Article Issue 12

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ARTICLE

Leisure: Living the Good Life.

Issue 12 The Leisure Issue Museums Drinking Shopping DIY Holidays

FREE warning: contains semi-explicit content

Leisure is a strange idea. It’s the word that denotes ‘fun time’ as opposed to ‘work time’. We engage in leisure when we are done slaving over a computer / workbench / cotton loom / student loan application, for peanuts or pay checks.

The history of leisure has taken some twists and turns, and the word drifts in and out of use. Loaded with two hundred years of connotation, leisure is commonly understood to have begun its seminal rise during the industrial revolution as the culturally sanctioned antidote to protestant hard-work and Victorian sobriety.

The nineteenth century saw the invention of package holidays along with the foundation of football leagues and the invention of Saturday as a ‘day off’. Free time wasn’t something new per se, but with machinery, work schedules and bosses, it was measured out and granted. It was a gift from the employer, the dictator of time. New industries sprang to cater for this allocated free time. Now in 2010, the Leisure Industry controls a massive swath of the economy. Everywhere from shopping malls to cinemas to restaurants to Wetherspoons provide places to spend hard earned cash in the pursuit of leisure. With this, leisure has become a defining feature of how we spend our lives, time, money and also, to some degree, how we define ourselves.

‘Hobby’ is a somewhat naff word to use in explaining what we do with our leisure time. It certainly conjures up images of backyard astronomy, ill-executed carpentry and ugly beaded bracelets. So perhaps understandably, it has fallen out of usage amongst the youth of today. One rarely says, my hobby is getting ratted on sambuca, going shopping, playing X-Box. Yet, if a hobby is what one does in ones leisure time, perhaps regular binge drinking

sessions are to be seen as a hobby, albeit an unhealthy one. Indeed, often it is these sorts of freely chosen activities that we use to define ourselves. I may work in a bar, but my real passion is civil war re-enactment and scrumpy.

Given the choice, I would do it all the time!

These hobbies often define who we associate with, to a further extent, who are friends are, and so some might argue, who we are.

Perhaps what is peculiar about defining oneself by a hobby is that what may be a hobby or a leisurely activity for one, most often, is work for someone else. The breadth of possibilities of leisure activities, whilst simultaneously allowing opportunity to define one’s individualism, inherently blurs its own line between work and play on a general societal level. Farming may be work, but for those following in the foot steps of Hugh Fernley W. it is certainly a hobby. Likewise knitting and bracelet making are often hobbies for alternative indie girls, but exist on the other side of the world as horrible sweatshop jobs.

Despite ambiguity, leisure, being the time we spend not working, both produces, and perhaps more importantly, appreciates ‘culture’.

Looking back with un-merited nostalgia, we can observe that the Greeks invented Western Culture, sitting around, getting drunk and talking, a tradition carried out in many neighbourhood pubs, city centres and student halls today. However, debating the chicken and the egg is not all that constitutes culture.

Art, film, music, design and food are all culture products often produced by people utilising leisure time in pursuit of their hobbies, often to be appreciated by others in their own leisure.

It is this relationship, of people producing and consuming that allows culture and its artefacts to develop, exist, undulate.

From this reasoning, one might conclude that if everyone was a professional artist, musician, designer, etc, the world would be a dreadful place. Instead of enjoying the works created, we would be simply left in a muddle of one-up-man-ship, passive aggressive compliments and sheepish apathy. Leisure and hobbies just make everything better.

2 friday

DQ: bigger than barry

special guests tba!!!

19 friday

dq: suckerpunch

Yes yes, that is what’s written on the ad. Evil Nine take on star night Suckerpunch with an epic two hour set. This is gonna be one big show.

10:30pm - late £6 adv / more on door

19 friday

upstairs: junk

coin operated boy adam smith +residents New boys on the Sheffield promoting scene, Junk bring a proper electro lineup upstairs featuring local lads Coin Operated Boy and Adam Smith, plus residents. Worth checking out what all the fuss is about.

11pm - late £4 / £3 with flyer

20 saturday

dq: threads

doorly bear skillz sandy turnbull Before leaving for a US tour and spending a summer DJing to massive crowds in Ibiza, Doorly will be gracing the stage DQ for an exceptional Threads line up. Big tunes, big remixes, big night.

10.30pm – 3.30am £3 before 12 / £5 after

april march

evil nine andy h mr shanks timmy dutch

26 friday

dq: club pony + krooked

riton roska

run hide survive up and atom Two rooms, one ticket, this night is gonna be HUGE. Downstairs sees Club Pony with London techno magician Riton, plus resident wonders, Run Hide Survive, Up and Atom, Six Foot Sick and Louis Louis.

Upstairs, Krooked has booked up and coming star Roska. Not to be missed.

10pm - late £5 adv / more on door

27 saturday

dq: threads

young blood residents party Letting the young ones run the night for a change, expect a joyous smorgasbord of all sorts from the likes of Fresh Fruits and Dane Howard.

10.30pm – 3.30am £3 before 12 / £5 after

Special guests have yet to be announced. Just know, Barry always has it large. Bass Bass, Wobble Wobble and more Bass Please.

11pm - late £5 adv

3 saturday

DQ: threads vs bbc raw talent

hiem starlings

renegade brass band live

djs iain Hogson

amy collin threads residents Live bands are always refreshng at club nights, and this week, Threads has got a veritable smorgasbord of ‘em. Plus guest DJs too boot!

11pm - late

10 saturday

dq regulars saturdays

threads The coolest, genre-less night in town is taking its weekly night to the next level.

Sheffield’s legendary club night plays a veritable feast of music, from Jay Z to Jefferson Airplane, Dizzee Rascal to the Doors, expect everything and anything.......live bands, DJ sets and no sniff of a music policy.

10:30pm - 3:30am

saturdays

DQ: threads

soul happening

little lost david, hyjinx and deano takeover

Playing rare grooves, soul, funk and disco with a few contemporary beats thrown in for good measure, Soul Happening makes the perfect boogie.

Sheffield Indie Hero, Little Lost David Team with Hyjinx, Deano anfdd the Threads Resident crew for this one of Threads Special.

10.30pm – 3.30am £3 before 12 / £5 after

9 friday

DQ: Club Pony

Run Hide Survive Up & Atom Six Foot Sick Louis Louis

Upstairs at DQ

sundays

charged Sunday clubbing at its best, soundtrack of the night is quality house music. The only place to be if you don’t want the weekend to end!

10:30pm-3:30am £2 b4 11/ £3 b4 12/ £4 after

It may be holiday, but Club Pony ain’t going nowhere! Resident Run Hide Survive will bring it large with the headline set.

11pm - late £5 adv

dq drinks offers Selected Bottles from House Spirit & Mixers from Shots from Jagerbombs

Midweek: £1 £1.50 80p £2

Weekends: Bottles from £3 Red Stripe Cans £3 Draught from £3 Single House Spirit & Mixer £3 Double House Spirit & Mixer £4 Jagerbombs £3 or 3 for £6 Double Vodka Redbull £4.50 or 2 for £8

dq fitzwilliam street sheffield S1 4HA www.dqsheffield.com 0114 2211668 design by pursuit www.impursuit.com

Andy Brown is a Sheffield-based photographer. You can see more of his work at www.envioustime.co.uk.

These images are from an ongoing project looking at coastal towns.

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ARTICLE Article is a Guide to the space that you are in. Connecting urbanism, pop culture, fashion, music, art and criticism. Article is driven by the desire to demonstrate that the normal and everyday is in fact fascinating and absorbing.

1. Introduction: Leisure

More than polyester slacks, golf and bbq. Leisure makes culture.

by Ben Dunmore

5. Sci Fi & Shopping

The future is a giant suburban shopping mall.

Orla Foster

8. From Behind the Bar

If you read Article regularly you may have noticed this issue looks a bit different. The decision was nearly arbitrary. After nearly two years of producing a black and white magazine, we felt like putting a bit of colour into our lives. Also, issue 12 is, well, issue 12. So we thought we would make it a bit special. We hope you like it.

Binge drinking considered, your actions have been noted.

Kate Lloyd

10. Casual Encounters

Free sex, the internet, company policy and regional etiquette. What the closure of Gumtree’s elicit encounters page might mean for the swingers of Sheffield.

Ivan Rabodzeenko

Article Issue 12 March 2010 The next issue of Article is due out in mid April. It will be made in collaboration with the Sensoria Festival, with 1200 copies printed. To enquire about advertising please email: ben@impursuit.com

For articles, comments, criticism and to view back issues www.articlemagazine.co.uk contact@impursuit.com Studio B4, Bank Street Arts, 32-40 Bank Street, Sheffield, S1 2DS Big Thanks to: The Site Gallery Team, PARTY WOO! Robin Beck and Mike Forrest and all concerned with Club Pony. Five Eighty, speed - its name of the game.

SCAF, Bank Street Arts, Debruit, Wee Bit Mean, Big Tuna, Sensoria, Rudi Zygadlo, Lord Bunn Team Zine, Jo and Nigel - pumped for the next issue, word! Ben Duong, always in there.

Edited and Produced by Ben Dunmore and Alasdair Hiscock More Design Ivan Rabodzeenko Photography: Sheffield Local Stuides Archive (Cover), Jo Crawford (Life Behind the Bar), Dedicated to the Unknown Artist used with permission courtesy of the Artist, Sheffield Contemporary Art Forum, Andres Kurg (Kunst Ja Kodu), Elliot Brown (Magna) Proof Reader Kate Lloyd Coffee and Cake Maker: Position vacant to apply email contact@impursuit.com 1 of 2000 copies Enjoy Article Responsibly.

12. Magna

History enforced

Alasdair Hiscock

14. Avant Garde DIY

How to customise your Estonian flat, and introduce minimalist art to your living room.

Alasdair Hiscock

19. Dedicated to the Unknown Artist

An essay on Susan Hiller’s seventies conceptual work Dedicated to the Unknown Artist and a look at Art Sheffield Life: A User’s Manual

Ben Dunmore

Interviews: 20. Rudi Zygadlo James Woodcock and Ivan Rabodzeenko 22. Debruit Ivan Rabodzeenko 27. Hobby Inventory Ivan Rabodzeenko 30. The Life Worth Living Kate Lloyd 31. The Man About Town Lord Geoffrey Crispin-Tiffin Hellier

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SCI FI AND SHOPPING “Silver domes resembling bargain basement kettles. Conveyor belts. Disembodied voices over a speaker system. Bizarre light fittings. Hordes of youthful creatures sealed in a pleasureseeking void.�

This and previous page: stills from Logan’s Run, 1979.

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When you were small, did you ever get assigned to write a story about being trapped in a shopping centre overnight?

After you finished the one about being shrunk to the size of a fingernail, or washed up on a desert island, it was all set to be your runaway bestseller.

In spidery Berol letters you set forth the horror of the urban shopping centre by sundown.

‘Nightmares In The Shopping Centre!!’ was the proposed title, and it was sure to reel in all the “Good Try” stickers from your teacher’s desk.

Back then, maybe, the English shopping centre was the stuff of nightmares. Good honest nightmares that didn’t pretend to be anything else.

A windowless, airless hall of mirrored escalators, where fried food outlets encircled shoppers like vultures, discoloured tiles stuck fast to the surfaces on which they had long been laid, and an overhead hanging bulb or two tarred the whole scene with a nasty yellow light.

In some cases, high street outlets would be interspersed with market stalls, and the smell of worn-out fish and animal flanks hovered over imitation clothes, cotton reels and discount bottles of nail varnish. There was never much impression of unity in these establishments. Get in, get your wares and get out. Nobody went there expecting a day at the races.

But gradually, as developers became aware of the untapped moneymaking potential of these zones, they set to work devising ways to get people to spend more time in them. The shopping experience was cranked up a gear and emerged as a legitimate pastime in itself. Gone were the tatty stalls: in swept the slick urban walkways, whose streamlined anatomy eliminated any chance of disorder or milling about.

It was this sanitised, wipe-clean environment which became increasingly embraced by the modern shopper. You know, The Modern Shopper. That well-heeled specimen which voluntarily spends its time flitting from one branch of TopShop to another. Maybe you fit the bill. How many times did you nod on hearing a friend sneer that Sheffield “has no shops?” How many times did you skim across to Meadowhall and pluck out your soul at the entrance, just because you wanted to find a pair of decent shoes in your size?

Like the High Wycombe shoppers who cheerfully mistook John Lewis for a B&B earlier this year, you may be at risk of enjoying a dystopian inferno. The film Logan’s Run, which came out in 1976, showcases a whole community of people in

your situation. Watch it, and wonder just when a vision once so gloriously alien began to accurately reflect your own surroundings.

Silver domes resembling bargain basement kettles. Conveyor belts. Disembodied voices over a speaker system. Bizarre light fittings. Hordes of youthful creatures sealed in a pleasure-seeking void.

No matter how Far Out such ideas might have seemed at the time of the film’s release, we are now well acquainted with structures that are designed to intrude upon the natural landscape, and all that lurks within them. They are not buildings you can casually sidle along into. They tend to be located in retail parks removed from the city itself, like a limb discarded to one side. If that limb sprouted arteries linking it neatly onto Junction 34 of the M1.

which we are led to believe that these structures operate exclusively at our convenience. Later closing hours endow shoppers with the dubious privilege of peering through clothes rails until past dinnertime, and those people behind you have wallets clasped to their chests as tight as bibles.

And you’re having your own hard-earned leisure hours ripped out of you for the sake of buying yet another nautical-striped top. The shabby old marketplaces never detained you like this.

If you hesitate for a moment, and drown out the choruses of “Found a really nice dress really nice dress really nice dress” from the surrounding din, you can almost sense that omnipotent presence in a board meeting in a shirt and tie, smacking its lips as decisions are implemented over your very head. Someone has taken pains to ensure that we all slot neatly into this environment, and there’s more than a lick of divinity about it.

Unfortunately for this sermon, the similarity Isn’t there? Like churches, retail zones are between retail zones and dystopian fantasies has characterised by their endless promises, with become such a commonplace observation that it billboards doing the hard sell on an afterlife you is hard to know where to run with it. Most people can buy into. Why is it that every forthcoming will have noticed at some point the giant plasma space must be advertised with a couple baring screens projecting endless superfluous footage their teeth as they clink flutes of champagne, eh? across every city, and if George Orwell had a Or a young blonde woman tossing her head back disused factory for every time someone muttered with alleged mirth as a diamond glints from her “It’s like 1984”, he’d be a little long in the tooth. neck?

No, it doesn’t take a socialist visionary to It might be because such images give us recognise the parallels. Everyone is well aware something to aspire to, and hopefully, if we’re that we finally caught up with the future, and for lucky, they’ll start putting into practice the the most part cloned shopping centres have gone Logan’s Run policy of blowing people up when down a treat. they hit thirty, so that we don’t have to experience

a world outside of the urban dream. And the So: cleaner surfaces, wider selection, fewer meaty security guards will no doubt take to shooting odours to contend with. What is there, exactly, would-be escapees and reducing them to slug to gripe over? Only that the modern shopping trails across the linoleum floor, in case you centre is no longer a place that lends itself well wondered. to primary school writing classes. Unless you’re

turning out a sci-fi potboiler, of course. Then At any rate, the end is nigh. Good luck and all the you’re in clover. Aside from a few test tubes and rest of it. I just remembered, I have a shopping an apron-clad robot, everything’s waiting for you. date with a world of difference. Guess I’d best

hop to that tram.

What is disconcerting, brethren, is the manner in

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Article 12

Photos by Jo Crawford.

“This series started out as a way to make my weekend job bearable. I had worked at this club for over a year prior to starting this series so I knew a lot of the faces that would come in every weekthis gave me freedom to walk around the club and photograph what I wanted. Im not judging these people in the photographs, I was fascinated by their behaviour in this environment, it was a different world to me. A lot of the people I got to know were genuinely good people, it was just so different to the places I would go out and my friends/family didn’t really understand exactly the kind of place I worked.”

FROM BEHIND THE BAR You wake up, after a night out, in a stranger’s bed. You’re £17.50 down, surrounded by unknown, inanimate, novelty items and covered in marker pen. You have no recollection of the past 12 hours of your life so start to fight your way through a barrage of missed calls and drunken texts in an attempt to piece together what happened. You soon realise that most of your friends were as intoxicated as you and that the night draws a blank for all concerned.

Getting blitzed seems to be a common interest of most of Britain’s twentysomethings, but it is a strange thing to enjoy.

Why is it that when the weekend arrives we enjoy drinking ourselves into oblivion and behaving in such an embarrassing manner?

Why is it that we often find that the only “hobby & interest” we can write down on our CV is that of “socialising”? We pay to turn ourselves into the confused old lady in the corner shop.

There is, however, someone who does know what happened, someone who was soberly watching you until four AM and who you probably didn’t even register: me, your friendly, neighbourhood bartender.

We don’t stop drinking when we are drunk or start running out of money. We drink past the point of no memories until we end up a foetal inebriated heap. I regularly see people stumbling towards the bar, their change falling like water through their fingers, their limbs flopping with the ebb of the queuing crowd and their eyes unfocussed and squinting. They’ll lean forward, stumbling a little, clinging onto the bar to stop the force of the pushing crowd dragging them under the sea of people, drag their handful of change forward and slur: “I don’t know how much I have, what can I get with this?”

I spend sixteen hours a week with Jager and Cherry Sours up my arms serving Sheffield’s binge drinkers. It’s a job that would be stupendously dull if it weren’t for the hilarity of such activity. By two in the morning, I’m on safari, watching drunks roam the great plains of clubland and it’s very entertaining.

One would assume that as a purveyor of what is, essentially, the cause of a slow and painful death, I’d feel a pang of guilt whilst slugging sambuca into the shot glasses of Britain’s youth or watching someone have a sly vomit into a pint glass. I don’t. The idea of avoiding something because it’s bad for you is, ironically, a dead one. The perception of brash, boozy, binging Britain as a terrible thing is just so noughties, man.

A youth spent enduring scare mongering safety adverts, numerous pandemics and the looming presence of health and safety legislation has left me tired of caring.

Binge drinking is an extreme sport. Like snowboarding, skydiving and water skiing, there is some danger involved, but that is significantly outweighed by how enjoyable it is to do and watch. Often the danger of an activity adds to its fun. Being told that we shouldn’t behave in a certain way because it’s detrimental to our health fires up our inner anarchist.

I have seen people perform a TATU karaoke striptease, have a competition to see who can swallow coins to the highest value (winner was £1.70) and attempt to fill up their shoe from the Carlsberg tap. I’ve seen you do things that you don’t remember, don’t want to remember and especially don’t want anyone else to remember. Why do we enjoy behaving in such a way?

As a bartender, I enjoy watching drunken, disgraceful behaviour and have starting to learn the core reason why getting battered is so fun for so many people. I think that it stems from the disconnection between being intoxicated and being sober. The same disconnection which means that I, soberly, see your behaviour as uncomfortable and you, drunkenly, see it as sexy, funny or cool.

The pleasure that we get from getting wasted doesn’t derive from the way we that we act whilst under the influence, it derives from the

feeling of escapism, fulfilling the desire to break free from life’s monotony but without too much obligation.

Escapism is sometimes easy; children use their imagination to play games and everyone experiences alternate worlds whilst dreaming: experiencing “virtual realities.”

Virtual realities allow us to experience a different kind of life to the one that we are living without the consequences or commitments that come with such behaviour in real life. Shooting someone on “Grand Theft Auto” won’t lead to your arrest.

As human beings we enjoy experiencing a different reality. Often, we pay for the privilege; middle aged mothers enjoying a good book before bed, hip young couples watching art house cinema or moody teenagers playing on a games consoles.

Drinking allows us to experience a reality that is almost virtual. When everyone is wrecked, nobody will remember much in the morning and nobody will have to deal with the consequences of their actions. A microcosm is created in bars of drunken people where anything could occur. Worries about getting in trouble or being ridiculed are dispelled. If no-one remembers, it didn’t really happen. When everyone in a bar feels as though they can behave however they want and starts to behave in such a manner; chatting up girls they’d normally find daunting, expressing their inner most feelings, dealing with arguments by fighting, the social norms of the microcosm move away from those of reality.

It’s a world without logic, restraint or self awareness and it is dissimilar to that of everyday society. It’s an easy, virtual reality that you can enter into with all your friends without paying too much money or having to use too much imagination. This is why we love the tipple so much.

As a bartender, I enable you to experience this virtual reality and have so much fun. A large tip would therefore be much appreciated.

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Article 12

ANCHORAGE I can host - m4w (27)

Some say that the best things in life are free.

Some. Whilst Christians, hippies, and most certainly hippy Christians hold this to be true, the remaining majority of society are at best sceptical of this tawdry maxim. Ok, so speech is free if you listen to the BBC. Love is free.

Article is free. Nature is free. Sex is free. The rub, however, seems that arriving at all of these cheap destinations tends to cost a bit of dosh.

The amount depends on your standards, status, preferences, skills and knowledge. There is always someone offering to teach / improve on / fake any of the above. Whole multi-milliondollar industries are built on getting you all the sex, nature, speech, shoddy journalism you want! Yet there are still some people who believe that sex should be free and getting it should not cost you a penny. Welcome to Gumtree culture, circa 2009.

Before the “urge” hits – after about eight in the evening – most normal people would go to the local bar or pub to get a few relaxers in. Those are followed by a casual stroll through a number of clubs and places of high entertainment in order to find the “one” for at least a night. This approach is far too medieval and requires lots of effort. High levels of stress are unavoidable.

To avoid this, a citizen of the 21st Century utilises the available technological advances, in this case - the internet. With 70% of British households connected to it, the number of possible partners available for action increases from the few hundred you will encounter on a physical night out, to tens of thousands connected to the global net in your area of operation.

With new technology, the final result – sex - is the same or even better. The rules of engagement are different. Preparations would start in the afternoon. Instead of pretending to listen to your middle-aged, alcoholic colleagues during a lunch break, you log on to Gumtree - a website offering charge-free advertising in every category imaginable – and browse through the “Dating – Casual Relationships” section. After reading through a few posts similar to “im very serious guys, so if you are interested in meeting up with a sexy single mum tonight while the kids are with their nan then please get in touch now and I promise you a wild nsa fun session. I haven’t had sex in a long time and I’m ready to explode tonite.

Only genuine guys please, no time wasters.” or “Really want a fella for later this evening – hi, I’m free later tonight so if any sexy fellas are interested then mail me.” you would find few that tickle you fancy and email back to them.

No registration is needed. Requests range from simple mutual masturbation to participating in a camouflage nature orgy and anything in between. If the posted items are not what you are after, you could offer the public your own scenario. After registration, taking a whole three and a half minutes and requiring no real details, the Gumtree community is ready for your wildest fantasies.

After a little wait, you get a few emails back some would be scams (schoolchildren trying to find gay partners for their head of school or the agencies “employing” Eastern-European staff trying to get your hard-earned dollar) but some would be from people just like you, liberated and unashamed individuals not afraid to expand their sexual horizons. Those will have

pictures, phone numbers and anything you need as proof of their compatibility with you. After a few more emails or phone-calls, you’ve got yourself a sure thing after work. To prevent getting raped, chopped up in to little pieces and scattered around skips of Yorkshire, it is best to first meet your potential lover in a public place and check if he / she is not a bi-polar, homicidal maniac.

This on-line method is a reverse of real-life pick-ups in the bars or clubs we all know.

Instead of dancing with – buying a drink for - and chatting up a stranger who might not want to be part of the sexual fantasy you have planned for the end of the night. You find a partner who agrees to the outcome of the night first, so everything non-sexual is just a redundant tradition. This way you are more likely to get exactly what you want – and you can cut the bar / club management people out of the equation. Plus if you happen to be insecure about certain bedroom “preferences”, the general public does not see or hear of your antics.

Gumtree has recently closed its relationship section, offering “too many complaints from customers” as a reason. It seems that some people felt browsing for second hand bikes and stolen electronic goods should not share the same forum as people cruising for a fisting.

Well, it could be that, or, as ebay now owns the company, maybe capitalism has something do with the issue, wanting to make Gumtree that bit more ‘upmarket.’ We are not here to cry about love for the people and the power of communism though. Luckily for you, there are number of other sites, providing similar services – for a price of no pounds, no pence.

Some of them are terrible, some have a female to male ratio of 1/100 and some provide prices for girls per hour. We will not bother you with their names; you can be sure that weeks of research went into this potentially useful and mind-expanding article.

I am looking for a woman who is a freak in the bed, I love to suck on boobs eat pussy and fuck all 3 of your holes. I am a white guy 190lb 6ft 7inch dick.

You bee clean and a none smoker, Married woman and BBW are welcome to. Put in the subject (Anal lover) for I know your not a bot.

Looking for love in all the wrong places - w4m I would like a partner to slow down and relax with. We can have some dinner, go out for movies, etc.. Could get a little more comfortable and get more intimate. I’m a independent girl with my personal apartment, car and [cat|dog|hampster (gottaí love him))#. Mid20’s, average assets and personality. Iím a lot of fun to hang out with, and am quite lively. It’s been a few months since the last time I had a guy and I miss that intimacy. Get in touch if interested.

Winter Fun - w4w I’m an outgoing, married, white woman who is in search of a FWB. I’m attractive, HWP, D/D free and femme. I am looking for someone who is femme, D/D free, fairly HWP, attractive and around the ages between 30-45 and someone who can be discreet!!!

Not really into someone who is into hopping into bed with anyone so I would like to get to know you. If you are interested in talking, tell me a little about yourself, along with a description of yourself--I perfer a picture. Put “Winter FWB” in the subject line so I know you are real. Talk to you soon, I hope.

CHICAGO A COUPLE IN SEARCH OF ANOTHER COUPLE WITH VOYEUR MALE - mw4mw (30) [voyeuer - a viewer who enjoys seeing the sex acts or sex organs of others] We are looking for a couple with a voyeur / cuckold male. We want to give him a show while we have fun with his girl. We are both open to some interaction with the male, but that is restricted to clean up. Mutual massaging is a possibly as well, if there was a want for all 4 to exchanging massages. Please send a photo and a description of your limits and wants.

Looking for my wife’s playmate - mw4m (26) Hi we are a married couple in our mid twenty’s looking for a playmate for my wife. I am twenty-seven six foot one inch tall and she is twenty-four five weighs one hundred and fifteen pounds with size thirty-six D boobs.

I am looking for a playmate for my wife I work a ton of hours and have little time to spend with my wife. I want to find someone to enjoy what my has wife has to offer. At first it might me as little as meeting and having drinks and just getting a good buzz on and enjoying a good laugh but then again it might be meeting and you getting to enjoy what my wife has to offer..... it all depends on her. A BBC is a huge pluss as she has never had one. I hope you are willing to travel becaues we love to go to casinos and bars. Only reply with pics if you want pics. If you seem intresting I will give you my phone number and we will talk. Hope to talk to you soon....

NEW YORK Is there black woman who loves white cock? - m4w WM, mid 30s, brown hair and eyes, down to earth, seeks a very naughty slutty black woman for fun. I love, love, LOVE eating black pussy. I am BBW friendly too. How about you? I am very turned on by the contrast of skin tones, white and black skins against each other is so sensual and I know that there has to be a black woman out there who feels the same.

So do you want to be a nasty girl, want to have your fantasy of a white man eating you out and possibly more? then you know what to do... open to chatting on the phone - very serious and expect the same.

A midnight encounter! w4m (24) Hello, I am looking for a casual encounter. Im looking for someone older than me because you will have more experience and you will be less immature than men my age. I just moved here a month ago so having someone to show me around town a bit might be nice. im about 5’4 and 130 pounds, brown hair and blue eyes but seriously you have to be older... looking for a man, not looking for some kid.

The one web-site we highly recommend to you is Craiglist, which was founded in San Francisco 15 years ago. You can practically smell weed every time you log on to the website – love is unlimited. Sadly, the people of Sheffield have not yet fully appreciated its power, so until everyone gets on board, you can only browse through sections of other parts of the world, but with a glass of wine it’s better than a night on the town! We have given you a small sample of ads to encourage you, our dear readers, to promote Craiglist culture in Sheffield as well as to give you the chance to compare the sexual fantasies of people in other parts of the world with your own. Enjoy!

GLOSSARY m4m – a man looking for a man m4w – a man looking for a woman w4m – a woman looking for a man w4mm – a woman looking for two men w4mw – a woman looking a couple bbw – big beautiful woman nsa – no strings attached bbc – big black cock d/d free - drug and disease free swm – single white male fwb – friend with benefits hwp – height / weight / proportionate

CASUAL ENCOUNTERS

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SYDNEY GLASGOW PARIS French lover for this week end - m4w (36) I’m free tomorow night and this week end, and I want to have fun with a french or foreign girl. I speak french, italian and little bit of english. I’m a tall guy, (1m83 - 70kg) short hair (brown), green/brown eyes, well educated, quite sexy when I want.

If the wether is correct we can have a “Paris by Night” ride on my motorcycle, always fun, panoramic view! We can have a drink and talk but what I prefer is to share something more physical. I dont need to know your CV, and it can be just for one time.

Hope to see you soon.

Please send a pic with you’r answer and I”ll send you mine.

No strings attached sex m4w (30) I am 30 Year old professional working in Paris who is to busy for a relationship but would like to meet a nice woman who is sexually attactive who knows how to have a good time and is adventurous! I would like to be as discreet as posible as I am in a very well known line of work and know a lot of people in Europe. I have my own apartment.

WINE + DINE + SEX = GOOD TIME Please respond with Photo This is a genuine advert

must accomodate this friday/saturday - m4w (29) Needing to service ladies next weekend. Very discreet, professional service that is totally free of charge. My only payment is your sexual pleasure.. please respond if you can accomodate fri/sat this week. Pics on request after you show me what you have to offer. xxxxx Looking for 3some/gangbang my gf - mw4m (23) We are both 23 and from Airdrie, looking for a local guy(s) to help me fuck my gf, looking to spit roast and dp her. Never done anything like this before, looking to surprise her. Anyone up for it? She is curvy, 36F, size 20. Im average build.

Topless/naked cleaner wanted - (30) Hello there. As the title says, I’m looking for a woman, preferably between 25-35, with a good body and an equally attractive disposition to come round to mine, maybe once a month, and give a dose of some topless/naked cleaning. I would like this to be something totally fun, bit of slapstick thrown in, so if you have a sense of humour then that’s a bonus.

Obviously, being the dirty boy that I am and having an over-active imagination, then a little more than just cleaning should be on the cards too. I’m just out to have a laugh, it’s total fantasy of mine this, so if it is yours too, or you’re curious and have a few questions you want to ask, then get back t0 me. Hope to hear from someone!

TOKYO

OXFORD

Hi. I really want to feel a hard hot cock in my hand........then rub and wank it until it explodes....... Ideally you will be younger and have transport, so we can meet outside, then you can get wanked off from a stranger :-))

SHEFFIELD Well...I’m tall, but guys like long legs right?? hehe i’m a teeeeeeeeeensy bit of an exhibitionist too LOL. Love getting drunk on bacardi to start the night off right, and clubbing with my girls. (25)

Looking for jack off budies, mutual fun - m4m (25) Looking for fit guys (i.e. slim, lean, toned, etc.; not overweight please) 20-29 for mutual jacking and perhaps oral. I’m in good shape 6’, 70 kg, 7” cock, big shooter. Looking for easy going people, preferrably other bi-curious guys like me, but masc gay guys also ok. Cannot host at my place, but willing to travel or possibly meet up outdoors, the gym, etc. Pics available, but please send yours first.

I am very discreet about this. I am drug and disease free - you be, too.

Cheers!

Woman to take student virginity required - m4w (19) Student needs the love of a good woman for the first time in his life...

Lecture me in love; school me in sex. Let me know the syllabus, and who will be teaching me... Cannot accommodate.

with nothing to do. And i need special healing.

Are you a female in need of some sexual experience?

Are you nervous about having sex for the first time or nervous about not having enough experience?

I’m an easy going good looking for meet up with a female who needs a bit of teaching. I will take things slow and take the time to find out what you want to learn and let you learn it in a safe non judgemental manner. If you’re looking for some experience, send me a message with what you’re looking for or what you want to learn and we can discuss and then organise to meet up. If you’re interested, write back with what you’re looking for and any experiences you’ve had so far. LADIES ONLY

LOOKS ARE NOT IMPORTANT,

RENT your wife .... - m4mw (45)

I just wanna hang out with someone FUN.

Interesting proposal isn’t it .... Ladies have you ever thought of the possibility of being with another man or even discussed it with your husband/partner? .. but were concerned with the dangers of an unknown man being intimate with you .. or the health risks or the required discretion ? but the thought persists .. the excitement still lives within you ? Guys.. lots of different motivations can be present here .. perhaps the excitement of seeing your woman penetrated by another man .. or the fulfilling of HER desire .. or more ... I am in my mid 40’s, fit (still do weights 3-4 times a week), virile and excited to please ... I am genuine, discrete, mature, intelligent, gentle and keen to fulfill a fantasy ... Interested ? .. email me .. let us see if this thought can become reality !!

I need some special healing - m4w (28)

Looking for cock to wank m4m (35)

Student looking to do it in an office - hi i am sexy looking girls with lot of sex experience i love to be fucked by any open minde person so if u thing u r the one just send me ur pic and i do the same make the pic more xx. i can accomodate as my parent went to holiday. No Time Waster Please. (26)

looking for fun tonight i am very adventurous looking for someone who would like to have some fun tonight, im tall, slim, and good looking, well hung - so much that i can self suck. i would like to act out eachtothers fantasies, without being afraid of things being to dirty.

Inexperienced? Need a sex teacher? - m4w (25)

I’m a black man from California.

Im good looking and kinda musclar.

I got in a skateboarding accident I’m off work for a week.

I can walk but I shouldnt walk far for now.

So Im basically trapped in my apartment

Mail me if you wanna see my pic.

Mature Japanese Female Wanted - m4w (26) Hi Ladies, A 26yrs old European white man seeking for a Mature Japanese nice and attractive Female, preferably around 45-50yrs old. I’ve heard that mature Japanese women are really awesome to have an affair with in the bed. don’t hesitate to take this chance and also, give me the chance to enjoy U, if U consider urself still worth a gold!!!

Just drop a line to this attractively active guy for any further details.

Waiting for U. Sincerely, W.

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Article 12

The Big Melt at Magna

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The Futurist Manifesto, in its odes to machinery and the sublime experience of speed, the straight line - man’s futurist destiny - the enemy is repose, passéism and romantic poetry. We must burn down the museums, no artwork shall outlive a man and a new generation will come forward to destroy the old, etc etc.

visit these machines, and see the process reconstructed in spectacular pyrotechnic effect. ‘The Big Melt’ runs hourly, and shows the great fiery beast in all its glory.

Industry has become a leisure activity.

In the late 1990s, Magna was born in a cloud of hope for the forthcoming millennium. The empty works were set to So you get the feeling that FT Marinetti, be transformed into a leisure extravaganza had he lived long enough, would not be emblematic of the regeneration of Britain’s rolling up in his red Fiat to Magna, the former industrial areas, a transformation ‘adventure science’ museum in Rotherham. that marked a shift from heavy industry to open, unplanned speculation.

Standing in the middle of a former steel works, at one point containing the largest The edges of towns have moved from an forges of its kind in the world, drunk industrial landscape to a leisure landscape. and unsteady, is a kind of affirmative The big shed architecture of factories is experience. It ticks all the boxes for imitated by a spread of unambitious retail a young middle class male in a post barns surrounded by acres of car parking. industrial environment; contextually The development of these out of town removed, in awe of the fading industrial centres is clearly built upon the industrial infrastructure, trying to get the right angle heritage - whether it be the site, the style or for a meaningful, expressive photograph a passing reference in name. You can move that has just the right amount of grey. in the same landscape that once produced coal, steel, power; between pieces of giant In its productive life, Magna was the infrastructure.

Steel, Peech and Tozer works, and was the world’s largest electric arc steel This is perhaps the inherent problem with producing plant. This attracted significant industrial heritage. What is preserved is international attention, including part of a much greater system which is features in American magazines such very hard to comprehend. As seen with the as Life. It also played a large role in the cooling towers in Sheffield, heritage is not manufacturing effort for the war. seen as valuable without a certain amount of context, and given this, the irony of The forges at the building’s heart looking at factories as museums is perhaps produceded enormous amounts of steel, in unavoidable. one massive process. Today you can pay to

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Article 12

AVANT GARDE DIY Fill your house with art.

For many, the term D.I.Y probably conjures images of middle-aged fathers with tools they don’t know how to use. Nineties sitcom staple Home Improvement saw Tim Allen and Richard Karn blunder their way through building wine racks, patios, and loft conversions. British day time television is full of do it yourselfers, from your budget channel five fixer up jobs, to poshovisionaries on Grand Designs. Our vision of this occasionally necessary hobby, is of one that separates the men from the boys, excludes most women, is more about tools, beer, plaid shirts, heterosexuality and chest hair, than actually making anything useful.

In seventies Estonia, DIY was a very different matter. Strict political norms on what art could and couldn’t be displayed, a lack of range of items in shops, and the fact that most people’s flats and fittings were standardised and identical meant DIY was an essential creative outlet for many people. Epitomising this movement was interior design and DIY magazine, Kunst ja Kodu, (Art and Home). By the seventies Kunst ja Kodu had become a subversive force…….

Andres Kurg has been researching the history of Kunst ja Kodu at the University of Tallin. We interviewed him via email.

Can you explain how these magazines functioned as a guide to home improvement did they offer practical, instructive advice on building like a DIY magazine?

Kunst ja Kodu (Art and Home) was started as a practical advice journal for new homeowners in the late 1950s, i.e. the period that is in general associated with liberalisation and modernisation in the Soviet Union. At that time it was indeed a very practical journal, featuring articles on where to put a TV or how to fit a piano into a small standardised flat. In addition to that, each issue had 2-4 detailed instructional drawings added to the article section, something similar to tracing-patterns used in clothes making, only these drawings were meant to help the

readers to make their own garden furniture, build armchairs or even construct lamps. It was a welcomed addition in a situation where there was not much to choose from in furniture stores and often the items sold were of rather poor quality. But the designers who published the magazine at that time and produced the drawings, also differentiated themselves on the basis of taste: producing unique objects not provided by mass production. The same publishing house that brought out Kunst ja Kodu had also a handicrafts magazine Käsitöö, teaching knitting and sewing and orienting itself mainly for women. So the DIY part of the Kunst ja Kodu journal was called “handcrafts for men.”

How did the shift into pop imagery develop with the new editors in the 1970s, and was the DIY element retained?

The magazine did indeed go through a major shift in the beginning of the 1970s, when Andres Tolts was appointed as the new editor and designer of the journal. He was a young graduate from the new department of industrial design at the Art Institute in Tallinn and had an unusually amount of freedom in deciding about the content and appearance of the journal. As he was also active as an artist in a grouping critical of the Soviet everyday life – the standardised housing, mass produced products but also what they saw as “uglyness” – he applied these ideas in the journal and asked his colleagues to write for him. Instead of practical advice the focus changed now towards the “environment” in general: landscapes, cityscapes but also home as an environment that could be designed or composed as a total work of art. The DIY section was retained, this was already a demand of the publishers, but its content now changed radically. In the first issue by Tolts he taught the readers how to build decorative wall assemblages from various patterned textiles.

These reminded very much of his own artworks at that time. In another issue the readers were taught to build storage units out of textiles, so-

called wall pockets, in order to “allow for the pretence of being exemplarily organised”, as an accompanying text explained. Most radical however is a piece from the end of 1970s, which introduced how to synchronise sound and colour at home, in order to achieve a greater emotional and synaesthetic effect, with sight and hearing being incorporated in the process of music listening. One of its suggestions was even that the whole design and color schema of a room could be made keeping in mind this kind of music listening: coloring the interior and all objects in it in primary tones and putting coloured spotlights in the four corners, the whole environment starts to play along with the music. Tolts himself has later called the things produced for the practice section “a kind of invented practice”, something that was not to be very practical. But also I think it is a good example how new technologies and new cultural practices (like listening to rock music) invade the space of the home and transform it rather fundamentally.

More experimental British housing projects such as Park Hill and the work of the Smithsons are closely linked to pop artists, was there anything in common here?

Yes, Pop art was influential for these artists and they saw themselves as developing a local version of Pop art that commented on and criticised Soviet forms of consumption and the changed everyday life, something that they called petty-bourgeois culture. It is interesting that if Pop drew from domestic culture then through this magazine this material was redirected back to people’s homes.

You have described the apolitical private sphere as a place in which avant garde art could develop because it was not concerned with style or aesthetics - has this remained as an idea today, as the world of art changes?

I think I am now rather critical on this idea of an apolitical private sphere being really possible.

It has been very much the case of presenting it as such retrospectively or it has been politically favourable to see it like that – as if the Soviet reality never really touched these practices.

The private sphere represented in the journal was clearly oriented for public presentation, very often illustrations for articles were staged in Tolts’ or his friends’ studios. I think the journal in a rather unique way used the means and infrastructure of Soviet system to insert an alternative idea to the public and even criticise the system. There intertwine things that are serious and things done jokingly, issues that are moralising and issues that are ironic. It is one of this paradoxical examples from late-Socialism where the border between official and unofficial or private and public has really become blurred.

What was the general reception of these magazines by the general public - how often were these designs realised in the home?

First of all, the magazine had a really amazing circulation, about 10 000 copies in Estonian and something like 30 000 in Russian (there was a Russian parallel issue of Kunst ja Kodu), I have found reference to the “style” of Kunst ja Kodu (in a positive sense) even in Russian novels of the period. Also it was only magazine of its kind in Estonia at that time and one of the few of its kind in Russia. So besides some East-German interior decoration journals that were available as well, there was not much else to follow.

Much of the furniture from the early issues in the 1960s was really tried out and built, and you can still come across these items in people’s homes. What concerns the 1970s, then among artistic people there definitely was something like the aesthetics of Kunst ja Kodu in the late 1970s and 1980s: white walls, dark geometric furniture and a vase with a single branch in it.

There were also other types of artists homes represented in the magazine, more colourful and patterned which were perhaps harder to copy. But all in all I think the influence was significant.

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16

Article 12

Spread from Kunst Ja Kodu

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Photo by Jo Crawford

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DEDICATED TO THE UNKNOWN ARTISTS

Susan Hiller at Art Sheffield 2010

Simple, wooden frames enclose one-hundred postcards laid out in clinical rows, like a nineteenth century collection of pinned butterflies and beetles. A corresponding sheet catalogues them, naming date (if known), artist (if known), place (if known). Apart from all being about 3”x6” in dimension, all of the postcards share one other thing, their title, rough sea. The temptation is to read them left to right as film stills. Doing so creates waves that rise and crash on the changing coastline, images alter, borders alter, beaches, strictures, boats too, but the sea remains constant.

Perhaps the sign of a great work of art is its ability to endure, to make itself relevant to generations of different time periods, to continue to adapt to its interpreters’ needs long after it is created. Made in the early seventies, Susan Hiller’s conceptual work Dedicated to the Unknown Artists is a collection of old postcards acquired between 1972 and ‘76. Her piece’s title is a reflection of the craftsmanship, kitsch style and artistic vision of these now forgotten, yet

once highly popular artists. However, her chosen process and method of display gets at something more than nostalgia for a bygone age of Great Britannia. In addition to venerating the fallen she also uses them to critique her own artistic contemporaries. The postcards are mounted on a sterile grid, catalogued and documented scientifically. This method of presentation reveals fascinating details within these mundane, otherwise generic, objects. Specific artists are credited with several works from all over the country. Variations in colour tinting of photo plates show pink, yellow and grey skies. When displayed together, out the context of dusty seaside shops, the collection is an inviting object of intrigue.

When first shown in the early seventies Hiller’s work met sharp criticism. The strongest accusation being that it was introducing pop art to conceptualism. In retrospect, such an allegation seems trivial, perhaps even humorous.

At the time, however, such criticism was serious.

Illustrating the extremity of the hostility the piece faced, Hiller explains in an interview from 2007: “I was told by a museum director that my work was too popular, that people liked it too much.”

We shouldn’t pity her too much though. Unlike criticism received in a middle school art lesson, such criticism most likely strengthened the work and ensured its longevity. By challenging the Conceptual movement, she served to advance it.

Today, Dedicated to the Unknown Artist forms the corner stone to Art Sheffield 2010, Life: A User’s Manual, the city wide biennial exhibition.

George Perec’s novel, Life: A User’s Manual, a

painstakingly detailed book about the minutia of the residents in a single apartment block is used as a springboard by Art Sheffield 2010’s curators. They attempt to explore the notion affect which claims that “the unspectacular acts of everyday ‘affect’ might be a way to chart a path through current circumstances.” If this all sounds slightly too academic for your liking, don’t worry. Simply put, the overall exhibition explores what appear to be small and minute details, in order to illuminate a greater whole.

In a walk through the gallery, Frederique Bergholtz, one half of the Dutch team of curators organizing the show, explains “the Susan Hiller piece was actually the starting point for thinking about this years’ Art Sheffield.”

It looks at detail, the small, the remote, the minutia, and in turn offers an understanding of ourselves, British obsession with weather, and how several different people managed to create works with identical titles, but immensely varied contents.

What is curious about this piece is its ability to mould and adapt. Its role, over thirty years ago, as a two finger salute to rigid norms in conceptual art means it now serves as a defining piece of the genre. Not to be ignored, however, are the postcards themselves. Many of which are beautifully crafted and rendered images of the ocean, hotel resorts, and waves of varying size.

The work revives and allows us to approach such forgotten common objects as the works of artistic merit they were based on. We look at them as contradictions, often the seas are not rough at all, they are images from the holidays that no one had, things that never happened.

         

21

Being the perfect example of intellectual revival in dance music, Rudi Zygadlo warped and skewered the DQ crowds at the first part of Wee Bit Mean’s two-parties-in-two-weeks bass injection. Integrating Eastern European folk vibes and rock experiments of the American Hippy Days into heavy analogy, piercing-synth, analogue electronica; Rudi is a new rising star in post-dubstep.

Recently signed to Planet Mu, the young Scotsman compiled the soon-to-be-released début album in austere comforts of his Glaswegian flat. Getting “bigups” from Mary Anne Hobbs and Starkey, Mr Zygadlo recently got a mix out for Electronic Explorations [ check that! ] After grabbing Rudi as he stumbled off stage in DQ, we got him to chat about the things what matter. Read on!

Your set was fucking wicked!

Rudi Zygadlo: You might be in the minority with that!

Josh: Just a little bit. Just... Just a tiny, wee bit. That stuff sends me... Hows the interview going?

literature. International Stuff. Quite a lot of Eastern European, a lot Russian writing.

And Rudi Zygadlo is a Russian reference?

I think this is an intermission.

Whatever! We loved it and that’s the only thing that counts!

You use really basic programs to make your stuff, right?

Yeah, just Reason and the standard package of sounds really, apart from my voice and any acoustic instruments which I record and use. Record them into Ableton or Garageband or just plug them in to the drum machine or Reason – so its really primitive. I’m not a technophile – don’t know how to use a lot of equipment. As I have been using Reason for so long, I’ve learned how to do what I need to do on it.

You only used your laptop tonight with a little keyboard? No plug-ins?

I was just dj-ing tonight. I usually play with a synth, microphone, audio FX box and a MIDI controller. Vocoder as well. Forgot to tell the guys I was playing the live set -my own fault.

So I ended up pulling out an old dj set – and just took that apart – a bit of a last minute emergency. Fucked it up. Was an old bunch of tunes...

You looked like you enjoyed it, man!

Yeah, I got into it, when I remembered what the set was about...

Do you want a key of mephedrone?

This is my second week on the magazine stuff and I’m trying to jazz it up a little bit. [loud sniff] I think giving people we interview mild drugs makes it more vibrant.

Ben: We usually write about architecture and urbanism and Ivan writes about sex and Nazis.

Which is great – livens the mood.

I’d rather talk about that than about my music to be honest.

How come you started to study Eastern European Literature?

Are you from Glasgow?

Probably, a large part, because of my heritage really. Also, I’m really interested in 20th century Eastern European literature under the communist regime.

Yeah.

Like propaganda tales?

So what’s your relationship with Buckfast?

More dissident stuff – like allegorical [stuff – replace] , how to survive under regime without being completely booted. Solzhenitsyn...

Stuff I enjoy mostly is Czech. Just because of the comical side. Compared with Poland and Russia, they took such a satirical angle to everything. So much of their stuff is to do with impotence. I like Kundera and Havel [ yes, the president of Czechoslovakia and after its break up, the Czech Repulic. Havel he also wrote books and poetry ].

Well, my relationship with Buckfast started before I moved to Glasgow – before I even left school. The relationship stopped when I moved to Glasgow – I grew out of it. And I’ve never been antisocial with Buckfast, contra to the popular opinion about the stuff!

Wasn’t there a campaign to make a Buckfast bottle plastic so people would just stop smashing it over other people’s heads?

Josh: In the past like 2-3 years there have been like 700 cases of people being attacked with Buckfast bottles. But I mean if it wasn’t Buckfast, it would be the next cheapest drink.

Whatever has the highest percentage and is the cheapest to buy – that would be the weapon of choice!

Go on then! Is that recording?!

Yeah, sort of! We are not really a proper newspaper.

No, that’s actually my real name. My paternal side of the family is Polish. So I got the Polish surname. “Zjhigalo”in Polish. And my middle name is Mikhail. Like Bulgakov and Barashnikov.

Ok, Rudi. What do you do when you are not making music in your room?

You are actually like my dad. His favourite author is Kundera and his favourite artist is Frank Zappa.

Aye, Zappa had a lot of connections with the Czech republic after ‘89. He was like a cultural trade ambassador for a while when Václav Havel came to power. And then Bush administration was like “You deal with Zappa – you deal with us!” And Zappa had to fuck off really [true story – read it up].

Let’s get back to leisure.

Music is always what I wanted to do. I was sort of disillusioned when I left school – with the prospect of being unlikely to make music for a living. When I was in uni, music was sort of pushed to the side. And I just sort of focused on academic stuff for a while. But not seriously.

Your musical connection to the intellectual background and to literature is very deep. All your pieces have snippets of fairy tales, cool little poems...

I just incorporate all that I know into my music. I spend a lot of time reading and have genuine interest in what I was doing prior to now. My recreational preferences in literature and things has also been fused into my work.

To exclude all academia from music would be impossible and be involved with it.

Sweet! Can see you are getting a bit bored.

Random questions!

Who would you want to see in the next 12 months? Who do you want to see?

I want to see Joanna Newsom - in a club.

Hmmm... Here is a hypothetical situation.

Imagine a dream club. My dream would be Daft Punk working the bar, Simian Mobile Disco in the cloak room – like doing different menial tasks.

What would that look like for you?

Zappa would be in the utility muffin research centre downstairs – making muffins. Joanna Newsom with London Symphony orchestra would be on stage...

And who would be in the toilet?

Beyonce.

Ok, you have to name 3 people. Who would you shag / marry / slap?

Well, I left uni last year...

[Sniff, coughs, shuffling in the background.] Is it o’right if my mate has a little bit? Josh, do you want a little bit of mephedrone?

What did you do?

I was doing a literature course – comparative

I read a lot, I listen to a lot music. Try to write. I write music and try to write prose.

Try to survive and have a social life. Being creative really. I left uni in order to do music.

Joanna Newsom, Jesus and Rupert Murdoch!

Sorry, I’m not very eloquent on the spot.

Let’s have another line!

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Article 12

Since Dubstep entered the mainstream last decade, crankstep and electro-funk soon followed as household names, thanks in no small part to all the cool cats looking for new genres to blog about. So when Skwee was injected into the Scandinavian music vocabulary someone in Sheffield thought: “Why aren’t we in on this?”

Clever... Skwee is a bastard child of electro, dubstep, hiphop and ethno. No man better represents this than cheery, French-man Debruit. Playing along British producers Bullion and Illum Sphere, he made his Sheffield debut at fresh night “Big Tuna” only a couple of weeks ago. A wicked producer and live musician, Debruit has recently moved to London after being signed onto Civil Music Label to join the likes of Drums of Death, Rusko and Reso. Using a hell of a lot of computer keyboards, pads and other nipple-twisters and button mashers, Debruit crammed together the goodness of pretty much every genre from Afro-beat to Hip-hop to Electro. After his set, we stepped out to the car park outside DQ to talk to the man himself.

First of all, your name is Debruit. Sounds French, but couldn’t find a translation for it...

quite a lot now and I know these live buttons like they are imprinted on the back of my eye.

On the different tangent. This issue is about leisure- what do you do in your spare time?

Debruit: “It’s a made up word. I had this name for ages, since I’ve been doing more experimental stuff at first. “Bruit” in French means noise, but for me the experimental thing was not noise. Then the people were calling my music noisy. So “Debruit” is the opposite of noise. That’s really deep and intellectual - now I’m all about fun! “Debruit” sounds similar to debris, when you break some glass – the way of sampling...”

And what did you use today [hardware – wise]?

Like the new Akai Contoller? And what was the red thing?

I like travelling when I’m not gigging. These are too different things. When I’m gigging I’m on my own, I’m not choosing my destination and most of the time I don’t get to see that I want to see. So you get very frustrated. You always get the bad part of travelling – waiting at the airport, checking your gear... Then you get the good part – gigging, but that is not travelling. Gigging is a leisure as well, it’s still a leisure for me.

The red thing is a live sampling device. So I sample separated channel whenever I want to. I sample live synths or drums – it’s a little more improvised and not as tight, but its cool – gives a lively thing going on, rough.

Do you have any big influences?

Kind of bi-lingual, I like it.

You played “Sonar” main stage last year. Did that find that everything got much bigger since then?

Everything influences me. I listen to a wide spectrum of music, and even in the music I don’t like there might be one element...

Sometime it’s even the structure of some African track and you just get influenced by it. You use other sounds and try to make it you own – not copying or stealing, but transforming. Every time I go to the gig, it influences me.

Ye, definitely. I got 10-15 gigs off Sonar. Next week I’m playing at Bahrain, at the Formula One Grand-Prix. The guys saw me at Sonar and if they didn’t I would be like: “Are you sure you know what I do?” “We heard the bass and your music and we came and it was fucking amazing!” Two weeks after Sonar they texted me.

To be honest I’m more influenced by a beginning of every genre – I always listen to where the style is created, whether it’s in the 60s or now. At the moment I do not have much time to listen to music, just because of gigging and producing so much – it’s too much information. I wish I could have like a 32-hour day!

They flying you Emirates or something? [laughs]

There is some amazing stuff happening right now – good energy. I don’t know if that’s because people are not buying as much records... Instead they go out and discover more music [live].

...take some pieces and make something else out of one shape... and you know. Wait, that is also a bit intellectual [laughs]. But not that much actually... I kept the name – its hard to pronounce.

Yeah, man – crazy! The gig at Sonar was kind of a threshold – not for making music and producing – but for live gigs. I was playing live and people saw me putting a lot of energy into my work – and it is a lot of work! I want people to have fun and I try to have fun myself, and communicate that fun.

Ye, we saw you! Your Ableton was mad then, all your little loops and stuff. Do you change [the set] around for every gig?

It never sounds the same – it can’t sound the same. If I wanted to make it sound the same, I couldn’t! It’s not easy to improvise, but I play

Since people stopped buying vinyl and stuff, it seems more important to go to gigs, especially around here.

I’m always happy with places like this. Today, probably 5-10% people knew me, maybe a few more listened to my stuff before coming.

So I have everything to prove to the audience.

If you are taking the piss, people would notice!

Travelling without gear and carrying stuff and planning your trip – so you get time to see things. Like recently I have been to Russia.

Was a bit of both. They asked me to play there and I said: “I can’t go to Russia for one day! Bring me over two days before and I will leave two days after. So I got to see Saint Petersburg and Moscow.”

What did you think of the scene down there?

I couldn’t say there is a scene down there, but I could see people were curious. There is an energy to go and see things they don’t know.

It’s the same in a lot of Eastern Countries. In

“These guys are taking the piss out of the audience, which is not fair.

[Sebastian] gets 10,00015,000 and Justice get 50,000 Euros a gig. Give me that budget and I’ll bring the craziest live set you’ve ever seen.”

Moscow it was more of an underground thing.

People were really open with no judgement before hearing things.”

What do you think about the scene in France?

I’ve got a crew in Paris called Music Large. We release records... and nobody respects us in France.

Debruit live at DQ

23

How come?

We don’t have a massive promotion budget.

We cannot be all over the place. Releasing good music is not enough, you need to have your image painted everywhere. We don’t sell many records in France, but we are sold out really fast abroad. There is only one shop selling our records in Paris. We are struggling because we do something different. There is only room for French Electro in France.

We love French electro. Did you see Sebastian Last year at Sonar?

Did you like it?! [with disgust on his face] Let me explain to you something about Sebastian!

You saw him at Sonar, I saw him at Sonar was his first live debut set. The guy had one Pioneer CDJ to play live. Did you feel like that guy was respecting the crowd? He was smoking a fag in front of 20,000 people and pressing play on his CDJ. Maybe a bit of FX flanger and shit. I was like “This is ridiculous!”

And you know the Justice thing. These guys are taking the piss out of the audience, which is not fair. [Sebastian] gets 10,000-15,000 and Justice get 50,000 Euros a gig. Give me that budget and I’ll bring the craziest live set you’ve ever seen. It gets to the business point. It has nothing to do with music. He [Sebastian] is smoking a fag, seems to be bored. I was like “Man, I want to punch him in the face.” That has nothing to do with his music, it’s just his playing live. And I know why he is not playing live, it takes a lot of effort and work.

The whole French electro thing is glamorous to a point?

It’s a long story – French Electro. I mean, I felt so outside of it. And every time I was on, the people were like “We are doing you a favour, we are putting you on as a culturally different thing.” I don’t need that. I don’t need any favours. I make the difference between the music and the people cos I know people making really bad music are nice people and I know the opposite as well. I’m talking about music, not about people.

One last question. Who would you Shag / Marry / Slap - name 3 people.

Famous people, I suppose? Cos I could say: my girlfrind / my girlfriend / my girlfriend.

Doesn’t count!

This is bad. How is she gonna like this? I’m not gonna show it to her. Who would I shag first? Hmmm.

Shag but not marry.

Oh no, no! Oh, man! Never, I would never!

Fucking not. I didn’t expect this question.

We were talking about leisure: I like to ride my bike, I like to go swimming in the sea in Brittany, cycling and shit... But who would I shag? I don’t know. Crazy question....

Moe: What’s going on?

Ah, man! They are asking me tricky questions!

Who would I shag and marry and slap... There is no name coming up.

OK, it cannot just be bang-bang-bang. Lets go on to “marry” then?

I’ve got an amazing girlfriend and I cannot think about any other names. I’m French and romantic. [loud banter] Come on!

That is very honourable of you! Ok then, who would you slap? Apart from Sebastian, who would you like to slap? Male or female – we are not going to discriminate.

That is an easy answer. Sarkozy, obviously. I’m going to slap him, but I might not open my arm, I might just keep it closed.

Moe: What about in the music world?

You always think about them. Hmmmm...

David Guetta.

Yeah, with that fucking hair style!

27

Inventory Hobbies

Making Conspiracy Theories

throw away

crop

crcl p ro x

This hobby can take just a couple of hours on evenings and weekends or it can take up most of your money and life. Dedication levels are yours to choose. First you need to start a blog or a website, informing people that you have been fingered by little green men, your apartment is under surveillance from the secret service and your mother is really a robot from the future. Your posts must warn people about all the conspiracies happening in the world today, ranging from the existence of mind-altering chemicals in your cereal bars to governments being in secret alliance with our alien masters. Use as much sourced evidence and references from other humanrace-preservationists as possible – your voice will sound stronger. No conspiracy is too big for you. Fidel Castro started a revolution with just 20 people and so can you!

cut and sharpen

x6

After you’ve accumulated a sizeable amount of visitors to your blog, you are ready to start writing articles about more conspiracies and sending alternative evolution and universe theories into highly-acclaimed and praised scientific publication like these below: www.vigilantcitizen.com www.weeklyworldinquisitor.com www.abduct.com You will soon adopt the title of “Space Real Estate Editor”, “Youth Armed Outreach Specialist” or plainly “UK Social Unpleasantness Correspondent” Well done!

After writing petitions to release government data on alien tracking and angry emails to representatives of global media to stop silencing the truth, you will be asked to present your views and opinions on various TV programs and shows. Under no condition must be you back away from your views or seem uncertain about things. Truth has many shades

If you think that normal hobbies are created by the government to bring the masses into quiet obedience or you are just too skint or too lazy to buy or do any of the things mentioned above, then there is a whole range of blogs, books and guides available for free, online to help you reach higher levels of perception.

'RRUV RI 3HUFHSWLRQ

Property of Sheffield Library - Do NOT Sell

side A only

Start with Aldous Huxley – Gates of Perception. Or even better, go to the library and get the book on tape!

EXCITINGLY

FRESH

After attentively listening for about an hour, press pause. You need something to further your understanding. Open your computer and search for home-made drug recipes. Peel some peanuts, collect the brown skins and smoke them.

Not enough? Go to Erowid and the household chemical section and try something inquisitive like mixing one part mouthwash, two parts vinegar, one part vodka in a small cup. Add three table spoons of paracetamol and half a teaspoon of baking soda. Mix thoroughly and microwave the mixture for 35 minutes on “high” setting. Wait for it to cool, drink and press the play button on your tape deck. You are on your way to enlightenment!

+

$OGRXV +X[OH\

D

Household Mind Expansion

MOUTHWASH

25ml

+

Водка

25ml

Drugdealer-Friendly

BAKING SODA

+

+ 1 table spoon

This hobby can potentially be free and can get you a spot on the front page of the local paper.

All you need is a 2m long and 0.4 m wide piece of wood, loads of string, a few wooden poles ( just break off the mopping end of the mop and sharpen it – who are you kidding?

– you’ll never do any mopping anyway! ), a tape measure, warm clothes and maybe a few mates to help keep you entertained.

Good design is the key. There are loads of free computer programs to help you make the most intricate of crop alterations with measurement techniques and order of execution all built in.

With advances in technology you can even get a iPhone app which lets you create a design in the palm of your hand, no need for a pen and paper.

After you’ve made the design, select the field you want to “improve” - use googlemaps, followed by a quick scouting mission to make sure the field still has things growing on it.

Be sure to think about access and potential escape routes. Foot marks should not be visible, use existing approach routes, such as farm machinery tracks. Plan the whole operation at home before going “into the field.”

+

50ml

Making Crop Circles

Back-to-Work PARACETAMOL

3 tablets

= enlightenment

Measure before starting – everything has to look perfect! Place poles in centres of future circles, stretch string between 2 points to make straight lines. First mark intersection points between shapes and then flatten out big areas. (Make the outline of the circle with a plank tied to the string connected to pole at the centre of the circle.) Use feet to move the plank forward until the circumference of the shape is complete. Flatten the inside. Continue until the design is crisp and professional.

Make friend with pilots at the local RAF base.

Ask them to make some surveillance shots of your creation. Then alert the media! Soon you will be able to laugh at the pictures in the “Boring Village Herald” along with your mates down the local.

29

Inventory Hobbies Nuclear-Holocaust / Regular Apocalypse Preparation Dog Clothing

If you happen to be a mormon or just want to ensure the safety of your loved ones against impending nuclear attack, preparation for such an event can potentially take up most of your spare time.

With every celebrity making clothing lines for people, the entrepreneurial thing to do at the end of the last decade was to make a clothing line for pets. Even Snoop Dogg was on it.

Your basement needs to be kitted out with radiation protection. Sleeping quarters and a food storage area need to be constructed. Luckily there are companies to help you do all that with style and comfort. DIY nuclear protection is the way forward. There are plenty of free books, guides and videos online to show you the exact steps you need to take to ensure cheap and reliable, man-made-apocalypse protection.

“Snoop Dog toys keep dogs and their hip hop loving owners grooving together.”

Your dog can get a stylish outfit with a hood and pockets on the back if they need to stash a pack of smokes or a cracker.

Then there are food supplies to be bought and regularly updated. There is an online calculator to help you figure out exactly how many hundreds of pounds of rice, rolls of toilet roll and tins of condensed milk you will need. http://lds.about.com/library/bl/faq/blcalculator.htm

Even American Apparel has made a sexy outfit for your four-legged friend. By applying their classic sex-in-your-face design style doggy style, pets can look as stylishly slutty as their owners.

http://www.radshelters4u.com/ - this helpful website offers “The Package”, including devices to measure the levels of radiation, tablets and serums against radiation poisoning as well as literature to help you at all stages following the blast.

If you don’t like what celebrities and top designers can offer you, you can make your dog’s desired outfit. Just buy toddler / kids clothes (depending on the size of your pet), cut few holes here, sew up a few there, add glitter and pop-poms and proudly parade your animal down Pitsmoore. Creativity can be practical.

“Study yesterday, prepare today and live tomorrow”

Sponsoring Rogue States Are you sick of letting the hard-earned dollars you spend on essential clothing go into the pockets of some soulless capitalist corporation? Do you want to make your friends think you are a free thinking politicallyinterested individual by just buying things on-line? Look no further. Buy clothing made in North Korea!

Not only do you get a pair of stylish black jeans ( they do not make blue jeans in North Korea as that is a sign of capitalism ) but you can also pretend to subvert the political power balance by directly sponsoring the economy of the rough states! They are only £140, so if you have any spare cash left from paying for the first deposit on your new Velocity Tower apartment, go online and be a radical individual! But don’t blame us when you have to learn Korean and wake up every morning at 6 a.m. to sing praise to your new Great Leader. http://nokojeans.com/

100th Anniversary Titanic Cruise

+ 1400 Pensioners

A unique package of 12 nights on a cruise liner with 1400 other elderly history and film enthusiasts, including memorial service at exact place and time ( 02:20 a.m. 14 Apr 1910 +100 years ) the original “Titanic” sank. Visit the graveyard in Halifax, where most passengers were buried and a place in the queue where you can hold your wife against the bow of the ship as she gently whispers carefully learned movie lines into your ear. Prices range from 2650GBP for an under-the-waterline cabin, with added bonus of engine noise, to a mere 6500GBP for the Premier Suite, offering you and your loved one 420 sq. feet of space with a sitting room, sofas, french doors, a veranda and a separate bedroom with king-sized double bed.

The cruise starts in the scenic port of Southampton and finishes in New York with the flight back to UK included in the price. You also have the option to go back via the same cruise ship for just 20% of a one-way ticket!

In the evenings there will be formal nights, informal nights, elegant casual nights and plain casual nights. There will also be various theme nights. If you don’t feel like socialising, you can also get pampered in the spa or get toned in the gym – on the boat! And if that is not enough, “Titanic” will be showing continuously on a loop throughout the whole journey. www.titanicmemorialcruise.co.uk

TITANIC mark 2

+ = FUN?

30

Article 12

The Life Worth Living Art Sheffield 2010 Life: A User’s Manual Organized by Sheffield Contemporary Art Forum, this is the fifth Sheffield Art Biennial. Curated by Dutch based duo Frederique Bergholtz and Annie Fletcher, the city wide art event focuses on the ideas of affect and attention to detail. 6 March - 1 May.

Sheffield’s favourite DJ gruesome twosome, ASBOa-GOGO, have gone digital with a suitably nsfw blog about sex, drugs and fem-rock. Lyrical prose and yorkshire slang make it worth a decent gander. http://asbo-a-gogo.blogspot.com/

No Limits Student Film Fest

Independent film makers unite for No Limits festival on the 17th and 18th April. Run by Sheffield’s students, the event showcases international, alternative and art house film making. Anyone can submit a film, making the annual festival a very democratic affair. It lures in guest speakers and offers networking opportunities for potential movie makers and outdoor screenings for cinema lovers.

Sensoria

In its third year, Sheffield’s annual festival of Film & Music brings acts, films and speakers from all over the world. This years packed out program includes British Sea Power performing live original film soundtracks, a collaboration between the Black Dog and Human Design Studio called Music for Real Airports, as well as film premieres and installations. Also, keep an eye out for the next issue of Article, which is being made in collaboration with the Festival Sensoria runs city wide from April 23rd -29th. www. sensoria.org.uk

On screen and stage, scenery is changed to affect our emotions. In the same way the landscape we are surrounded by sets the scene for our lives. The “Public Fear in an Urban Landscape” workshop gives individuals the opportunity to engage with and express their reactions to the city through photography and writing. The event will run twice on the 17th of March at the School of Law.

Fear and Loathing in Sheffield: Public Fear in an Urban Landscape After a year of photographing hard party goers, Guy Atkinson presents a series of shots, offering an inviting look into Sheffield’s vivacious and effervescent underground clubbing community. The unique scene is documented in exhibition “Night Works” at Access Space until April 14th.

The Night Works Exhibition

31

Chris Shelton Exhibtion at Access Space.

Perhaps an antidote to the commercialism of the ‘Art World’ or maybe just for fun, the upcoming exhibition at Access Space in April, allows visitors to the photocopy and take home the drawings of Chris Shelton.

Mapplethorpe: Sound and Screen, 18th March.

Spitscreen Collective presents an evening of music, sound, video and art celebrating the life and work of, photographer, Robert Mapplethorpe at the Graves Gallery. Bands, performances, video and artwork communicate the themes of his work enhancing the Mapplethorpe exhibition running and allowing visitors to immerse themselves in his world.

LADOZA PRINT

a message from our sponsor:

Twenty five limited edition silk screen prints are on sale now at The Old Sweet Shop, Nether Edge, to raise funds for this year’s Sheffield Hallam Fine Art Degree show, priced at just £20.

The Man About Town Adopting the colloquial resurgeance of 50s American surfer parlance, it seems fair to say, everyone around town is beginning to Wile Out a tad; with things going off in every conceivable manner.

First, there was the verbal punch-up between a Vicar and two Irishmen, alleged idolatrous worship of money, the pope, and non-Sheffield troubadours, resulting in a schism in the Church of Sheffield Music Festivalling. The Vicar, of semi-acclaimed Vicar and the Draftsmen, in a textbook demonstration of the dangers of internet spleen venting, seems to have created, perhaps inadvertently, a backlash against the Bus Timetable Music Festival. While it is not in this public servant’s interest to point fingers, choose sides, or slander individuals concerned, perhaps the Vicar’s reaction may have not only been unmerited, but totally ducking cupid.

The crux of the allegation, it appears, seems to be that of profiteering from a business venture. That the two involved in Bus Timetable took advantage, and profiteered wantonly. Without wanting to put a foot in, so to speak, I may have to break with my own patriotic and religious convictions and settle with the leprechauns on this one. Not everything can be socialist, utopian, or lurecal.

However, apparently this is what the Vicar wants, and the summer now looks like it may play host to two festivals. There will be a good one with a mix of acts from far and wide and a shite one, with lurecal bands, in lurecal bars for lurecal peep-el. Because music shouldn’t be about how good acts are, but where they are from and what sort of accent they affect. Oh, and Peace in the Park, which in the opinion of the Article staff is ‘effing wicked, mate.’

But enough infighting gossip for now. There is news elsewhere. Rumours have circulated that an illusive figure from Sheffield’s glory days is to return. Literally from the ashes, Gatecrasher is to be resurrected, in none other than Sheffield’s newly built, Cheese Grater, a building that is as iconic as the Cathedral in the City. The Article staff are hopeful that the two brands can integrate successfully. Coming out of the melting pot as the complex Gratecrasher; hosting the parmesan room, cheddar bar and Double Gloucester bogs. Whilst spectators may find this news brie-liant, we fear, if it is anything like the old Gatecrasher, the DJs could be stil-tone deaf. We hope whoever is running it knows how to polish a curd. It really feta be good and they’ll really have to try to make the opening night a fon-due, as any nightlife brand that is over twenty years old is likely to be a whey to ripe. But what the hall-oumi, another nightclub can do no harm.

In fact, it seems we need more! I am told there have been some ‘massive bookings’ of late and this is set only to increase. This being a new decade, there are new rules to the game. Rule number one, every club night is required to play Ms. Dynamite’s ‘Wile Out’ at least twice a night. If this simple requirement is not met, 50% of female punters and 28% of male punters will feel bored, unfulfilled and ostracized by the musical choice. A similar rule was in effect this time last year with a certain remix of a red-Leicesterheaded crumpet by a certain Mr. Skream-cheese. Rule number two, find a supply of Mcat. With summer fast approaching, and NME, Q and other such plebeian publications always in search of pseudo-edgy topics, we may well see June-September 2010 dubbed the Summer of Plant Fertilizer. The sixties had acid, the eighties cocaine, the nineties ecstasy, the noughties Facebook, the tweens cathitones. Without encouraging drug taking, if you are into jumping on bandwagons and generally being ‘down with the kids,’ (lord knows why!) you’d best get down to Homebase. As of yet, owning the substance is not illegal, and no one knows what it does to you, apart from encourage wisdom tooth growth, so it can’t be that bad…

Let us get away from this juvenile nonsense. There are actually some important engagements set to occur. Firstly, a Citywide Contemporary Art Event is set to take place. Without going into details, the events run between March and May Day. Should you find yourself awake at civilized hours and bored of playing X-Box in your jammies, go in to town and look around. There are some exceptionally well printed ‘Manuals’ kicking about as well.

Finally, we made it gentlemen, we did it. Indeed! Sheffield has made Shortlist for 2013 UK City of Culture. We will roger you senseless Birmingham, Norwich and Derry. Not a chance.

Sincerely, Lieutenant Geoffrey-Crispin Tiffin Hellier