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VOLUME 12 APRIL 2016 NUMBER 4 SUPPORTED BY READERS LIKE YOU
SET SHORT AND LONG TERM GOALS MEMO FROM NARA... Freedom of speech is our right today. We are free to question everything and anything happening around us. There was a time we had no freedom to ask questions. In fact we were afraid and we were also not allowed to question. We accepted everything and anything even within our own family. In schools and colleges we just blindly followed what the teachers and professors said. We thought we have to follow the elders. But today, in the modern world education opened our eyes to ask questions to find sensible answers. Both boys and girls have the courage to question every activity in order to get a suitable answer. Even the government orders or court judgements are questioned! In our parliamentary system, we see how the majority party is questioned by the minority parties. People today ask questions like: ‘who says God likes topless men not jeans?’ and ‘why Science Congress is a circus?’ If such questions are not asked there will not be progress in these fields. In order to make improvements and progress we need to ask constructive questions which will lead to constructive planning and execution of projects. This is the positive side. At the same time, people question just t o block a project. Such protests sometimes lead to violence. We do see such activities everyday in our towns and cities. Free speech sometimes offends somebody. Last year (2015) in the month of January 12 people connected with Charlie Hebdo were gunned down in Paris because of the free speech phenomenon. Cartoons supposedly insulting the Prophet Mohammad were published in Charlie Hebdo. Writers want freedom to write whatever they want. Free speech has to be curtailed if it calls for violence or criminality. Respect for others has to be kept in mind when we speech or write. Questioning is not wrong, but protesting is wrong. Questioning is to find a solution. Protesting is a severe method used for finding solution. Freedom of speech has to be used in the proper way. We cannot speak irrelevant things in the name of freedom of speech. One has to be responsible to look the good and bad of an event or an idea or an opinion or a viewpoint. Then only one can find a solution. Preconceived hard ideas cannot solve a problem! Most of the politicians and lawyers employ a technique to achieve their goals. The technique is to simply crate fear in the minds of people. People with fear cannot be free. So they lose their freedom and never try to question. Such things are tried with individuals. At the same time, the fear is overlooked in a group of individuals. These groups revolt and question politicians and lawyers. In India, although it is free and democratic, freedom is somehow denied for a larger section of people even today. Only the braves stand up and question whereas the weak submit and keep quite. Probably that is the way of life – it appears!
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FOOD FOR THOUGHT... Surround yourself with people who know your worth. You don’t need too many friends in your life, you just need a few who can see who you are, and appreciate your uniqueness and value. Bad habits are like a comfortable bed, easy to get into, but hard to get out of.
RULES FOR LIVING
How DEALING to Stop Apologizing WITH REJECTION First, recognize that not everyone is like you. We have different likes and dislikes, we want different things, and we all see people and the world in different ways. Hence, it is natural that sometimes people will be upset, offended, or react differently from what we expected. It’s not necessarily personal – it’s more a reflection of the fact that we all are different. 2. Try and leave your emotions aside and objective analyse the situation. Ask yourself: “Is this person’s reaction triggering something me?” It could be that you are overreacting to a perceived rejection because of previous hurts, put downs and rejections. Alternatively, the other person’s reaction could be more related to what is going on in their life at the time (rather than being a personal rejection of you.) 3. Be alert to over-generalizing and over-personalizing. For example, look out for the tendency to think things like that “That means I’m a terrible person, and no-one likes me” or “I never do anything right. I always say and do the wrong thing. I’m always going to get it wrong and be rejected by everyone.” 4. Look for friendships and affirmation in other places. It’s wise to have a wide range of friends and acquaintances so that our self-image and self-esteem aren’t tied into how a few key people treat us, or react towards us.
- DALAI LAMA
JUST TO LAUGH... A rich businessman walks down the street when he spots an old man sitting with a fishing rod next to a puddle, trying to fish. The businessman takes pity on the old deranged man and invites him to lunch at the coffee shop close by. After the meal, the businessman asks him with a smile: “So? Did you catch any fish today?” “Sure did,” answers the old man “you’re my third one.” A little girl comes home from school and tells her mom ”Mommy, today I got punished for something I didn’t do!” “What?. What do you mean?” Her mother says, angry, “I’m going to call your teacher right now! What is it you didn’t do?” “My home work.”
LINES I LIKED...
Many good sayings are found in holy books, but merely reading them will not make one religious. Many men seek to destroy innocent lives in order to promote a cause or gain power over others. Many of our most baffling problems are pure illusion. Many of the great things in the history of our civilization have been achieved by the independent will of a determined soul.
5. Accept that snubs and rejections are part of life. We can’t please all of the people all of the time – we can only please some of the people some of the time. And while it’s wise to check to see if we display certain habits, traits or behaviors that often annoy others (and it is wise to work on changing those), at the end of the day we just have to be ourselves. We can’t spend our lives walking on egg shells, or trying to be someone we were never meant to be.
TO QUOTE... We fail to see the opportunity for joy that is right in front of us when we are caught in a belief that happiness should take a particular form. – Thich Nhat Hauh Kindness in words creates confidence and kindness in thinking creates profoundness. – Lao Tzu Rising inequalities is one of the great challenges of our time: Thomas Piketty. There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so. – William Shakespeare No matter where you go, there you are! Meet you next month – May, 2016
Professor A. Narayanan, Ph. D., FISPP E-mail: arumugakannu@gmail.com Ph : 0422 4393017 Mobile : 098422 42301 www.nara.tumblr.com (NARA’S DIGEST) www.nara2007.blogspot.com (NARA’S NOTEPAD)