Volume 99, Issue 1

PHOTOS | 08

HELLO, MY NAME IS THE

collegian VOLUME 99 | ISSUE 1 | 2 OCTOBER 2014

WALLA WALLA UNIVERSITY

TRAVEL | 10

03 Just as our cover is composed of many faces, The Collegian is a collective self-portrait of many facets. In other words, it is our goal as staff members of this publication to reflect the student body.

The best way for us to do this is to include you in the conversation! We are always open to student contributions for any section.

This is and always has been a part of this paper’s identity—the opportunity to make your voice heard. We hope you’ll enjoy the first issue of Volume 99 as much as we enjoyed putting it together and that you’ll decide to join the process as the year progresses.

RICKY

BARBOSA Editor-in-chief

Here are a few things you’ll find this week: a breakdown of

02 context

At our most basic level as students and as humans, all we really want is to live fully and The Collegian reflects that desire. Over the course of this year, we want to make sure you are fully entertained and informed, but also that you come to see your world more clearly and seize life accordingly.

P.S. My apologies to anyone involuntarily included on the cover! You’re all equal parts beautiful and hilarious.

Religion | 6 Opinion | 7

Photo by Tyler Sherwin

http://img4.wikia.nocookie.net/

Photo by Erick Juarez

Editor’s Letter & Table of Contents | 2 News | 3 TBAH Info | 4 Week in Forecast | 5

the newly implemented Higher One, an investigation into the bendability of Apple’s iPhone 6, a preview of ASWWU’s service project, and a few words taken out of context at just the right moment.

06 perspective

08 life

GO

kisl

you are find our quarter front of

Snapshots & #thecollegian | 8 Humor | 9 Travel & Creative Writing | 10 Food | 11 Culture | 12 Fashion | 13 Science | 14 Sports | 15 AfterWords | 16

At the your frie best thin was.

Senio “The bes favorite

Katie “I get to people.”

Josh student thing to own age people.”

While were po the onl looked f

Jon S what he Ranch.”

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ricky Barbosa ASSISTANT EDITOR Karl Wallenkampf HEAD LAYOUT EDITOR Mindy Robinson HEAD COPY EDITOR Andrea Johnson HEAD NEWS EDITOR Shelby Seibold HEAD PERSPECTIVE EDITOR Alex Lemnah HEAD LIFE EDITOR Carolyn Green HUMOR WRITER & OFFICE MANAGER Lauren Lewis

RELIGION EDITORS Benjamin Ramey Randy Folkenberg AFTERWORDS WRITER Carly Yaeger

CREATIVE WRITER & COLUMNIST Abigail Wissink FASHION WRITER Alyssa Hartwick

SPORTS WRITER & PROMOTION MANAGER Alex Wagner

NEWS WRITERS Savannah Kisling Morgan Sanker

FOOD EDITOR Rachel Peterson

HEAD PHOTO EDITOR Erick Juarez

CULTURE EDITOR River Davis

COPY EDITOR Tyler Jacobson Kayla Albrecht Rachel Blake

TRAVEL & LOCAL EDITOR Shannon Pierce SCIENCE & TECH EDITOR Daniel Hulse DISTRIBUTION MANAGER Zachary Johnson

LAYOUT DESIGNERS Matthew Moran Ian Smith

If you are interested in contributing to The Collegian, contact our section editors, page writers, or the editor-in-chief at aswwu.collegian@wallawalla.edu. The Collegian is boosted by regularly incorporating a wide range of student perspectives.

Cover Credit: Photos by Erick Juarez, Monica Culler, and Shannon Pierce.

The Collegian is the official publication of ASWWU. Its views and opinions are not necessarily the official stance of Walla Walla University or its administration, faculty, staff, or students. Questions, letters, and comments can be sent to aswwu.collegian@wallawalla.edu or richard.barbosa@ wallawalla.edu. This issue was completed at 4:59 a.m. on Thursday, October 2, 2014.

For information about advertising, please contact Shandra Cady aswwu.ads@wallawalla.edu.

The Collegian | Volume 99, Issue 1 | 204 S. College Avenue, College Place, WA 99324 | collegian.wallawalla.edu

CONTEXT

03

NEWS

GOOD TO BE BACK? kisling

At the Welcome Back Bash, I asked your friends and classmates what the best thing about returning to school was.

Senior Michael Wilkinson said, “The best thing is I’m able to see all my favorite people in the world.”

Katie Heinrich, sophomore, said, “I get to meet a whole bunch of new people.”

Josh McKinney, recently returned student missionary, found the best thing to be “being around people my own age and being around a lot of people.”

While seeing friends and people were popular answers, those weren’t the only things that most people looked forward to.

Jon Spracklen had two words for what he looked forward to: “Worm Ranch.”

Senior Rachel Blake said, “The best thing is getting out of the summer routine and not working forty hours a week.”

Jon Mack had a sentiment familiar to many: “I have to say getting into the routine of not knowing what to do next.”

“The best thing is the energy and the sense of community on campus.”

There are those that take joy in the little things. Chase Armayor, senior, said the best thing was restrooms.

Tim Tan, sophomore, said, “The best thing is that it’s not SoCal.” Kyle Santos found the best thing for him was organic chemistry—he then clarified, “it’s meant to be a joke.”

There are many good reasons students have returned to Walla Walla this year. According to Savannah Weaver, “The best thing is the energy and the sense of community on campus.”

Freshmen, take these words to heart as you shape your college experience.

blog.uheaa.org

Walla Walla and College Place are many things: quaint, well-cultured in food, rural chic, roomy, bumpy, SAVANNAH small, dusty, and typical, things you News Writer look for when you are settling down. Yet here we find ourselves, on the cusp of a new quarter with an entire school year in front of us.

HIGHER ONE DISBURSEMENT SERVICES

Walla Walla University officially subscribed to Higher One Disbursement Services on the 11th of September to decrease credit and debit card processing fees and to protect students’ confidential information. Higher One currently serves over 13 million students at over 1,600 campuses nationwide.

Last year, the University paid over $200,000 dollars in credit card processing fees. Switching to the Higher One system will allow the University to save hundreds of thousands of dollars during the years to come. However, Higher One charges a service fee of 2.75% for each payment made with a debit or credit card. The University will not collect any part of this service fee.

When asked to disclose her opinion, sophomore Johanna Chevrier stated, “Higher One is a great opportunity for students to learn how to handle money and it gives them a chance to use their student financial aid for things that they really need. Shopping at the bookstore won’t be as painful and charges for clubs will not be as complicated”.

http://leone-keeble.com/

All students have the choice to recieve a Higher One debit card to access WWU disbursements. Each card will be delivered to students’ school year addresses in a bright green envelope. In order to avoid processing fees, WWU strongly suggests the use of direct deposit or paper check to direct students their dues. For more information on how to activate your card, please contact Student Financial Services located in the CTC. “I believe that it is really dangerous to have this system in place. I know many students will get themselves into huge financial trouble because of their personal lack of willpower and reluctance to follow the university’s advice, and will instead invest in a new couch or TV,” sophomore Katelyn Swagger expressed. In 2012, the average college graduate debt amounted to a whopping $32,656 with an average of $15,607 in credit card debt.

Overall, the Higher One card can be used well or it can be used poorly.

One can choose to use their card to buy textbooks or for one too many deliveries of Hot Mama’s Coffee. In the end, the cards are in the students’ hands and should be used wisely.

MORGAN

sanker News Writer

In 2012, the average college graduate debt amounted to a whopping

$32,656 $15,607 with an average of

in credit card debt.

NEWS

0405

VARIOUS

TO BUILD A HOME RUN FOR Senate

UPDATE

What is To Build a Home?

SENATE

To Build a Home is ASWWU’s service project. So as a student, this is your project! Each year, the student body adopts a cause, and this year, we’re continuing the project we started in 2013-2014. Our goal is to raise 100,000 dollars to put towards building a new orphanage for children in Kasese, Uganda. There are currently three student missionaries serving there: two are helping with the children, and one is overseeing the construction process.

and

MAKE YOUR MARK Campus advancement, inquisitive discussion, passionate service, and a lasting legacy: these embody ASWWU Senate. Your significant, paid contribution to maintaining a powerful student voice on campus is crucial: ASWWU Senate energizes student life by funding tangible and intangible improvements– from water-bottle fillers to Hillsong-style vespers.

Run for ASWWU Senate.

Pick up a declaration form from the ASWWU offices, or go to aswwu.com and visit “SENATORS” under the ASWWU dropdown by October 9.

Summer Update This summer, a few members of ASWWU’s Global Service team took a trip to Kasese to assess the situation and the needs of the current facility. They were able to scope out the land, meet with the architect and local leaders, and build relationships with the kids. They also laid the groundwork for a student mission trip during spring break to build the new home.

Our Current Situation This fundraising campaign began last year, but there is still much work to be done. The Adventist Intercollegiate Association (AIA) has agreed to adopt our project and we’re having a collaborative weekend event where several colleges will help raise money. We need all the help we can get. Even the smallest contributions add up, and you can make a difference even if you think you don’t have much to offer!

WEEK IN FORECAST

Week in

FRIDAY

Ocotober 3

1 79°

Vespers: University Church, 8 P.M. Speaker: Paddy McCoy ASWWU Afterglow: Chan Shun steps, 9:30 P.M.

06

wikipedia.org

Timothy Torres

05

Mason Neil

Erick Juarez

FORECAST 03 04 SATURDAY

October 4

2 77°

SUNDAY 1

October 5 84°

The Longest Table: College Avenue, 1:30 P.M.

Mask Photos: CTC - 2 P.M. - 6 P.M.

Faculty Recital University Church 6 P.M. Kraig Scott

70th Anniversary of Women’s Suffrage in France

07

MONDAY

Fall Classic: Service Day:

Janelle Aguilera

Octobor 7

2

81°

Week of Worship: University Church, 11:40 A.M. Speaker: Iki Taimi

1 81°

Week of Worship: University Church, 11:40 A.M. Speaker: Iki Taimi

October 9-11

TUESDAY

October 6

UPCOMING EVENTS

08

Timothy Torres

e?

NEWS

05

October 15

WEDNESDAY 2

October 8 72°

Week of Worship: University Church, 11:40 A.M. Speaker: Iki Taimi Allied Health Interviews: Career Center, 8 A.M. - 5 P.M. Andrews University - PT LLU Allied Health

Family Weekend: October 4-26

PERSPECTIVE

0607

expectations

RELIGION

religion 101: ‘CAUSE YOU’RE IN COLLEGE

RANDY

folkenberg Religion Writer Happy Thursday and welcome/ welcome back to Walla Walla University. Let me just say that you made a great decision by reading The Collegian, and you have made one further and even greater decision: choosing to read the Religion page!

BENJAMIN

ramey

Religion Writer www.bigthink.com

“...begin challenging your own assumptions. Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won’t come in. If you challenge your own, you won’t be so quick to accept the unchallenged assumptions of others. You’ll be a lot less likely to be caught up in bias or prejudice or be influenced by people who ask you to hand over your brains, your soul, or your money because they have everything all figured out for you” — Alan Alda, Things I Overheard While Talking With Myself I am stoked for this new school year. We are awake, alive, conscious, and able to take part in the ongoing creation of the universe, a reclamation of shalom, that is to say, an invitation for peace among all people. It’s time to make our mark. We stand gazing at the footsteps left by those who came before us and brought us to where we are–its time we follow their path and lengthen the trail. Our ancestors traveled further and further into the realm of the unknown and emerged with new light, strengthening our understanding of reality. They call us to carry on the tradition, to better ourselves and progress humanity towards the divine intentions.

If our hope for college is only to earn a degree, get a job and make a living, our life will be focused only on survival and monetary success. We are intent on striving for more than just

survival—college is about seeking to understand and learn more about the things we love, letting the things that stir our hearts drive our innermost being. For some, that’s understanding the variances and complexities in music, for others it’s learning about the proper ordering of creation through business and administration. Let your desires move you, find that thing that when you do it an hour seems like a few minutes, the thing that focuses your mental capacities and makes you feel alive. True education gives you the freedom to study what you want to study and go where you want to go, be who you want to be. It is your life, your path, nobody else’s. As John Keating in Dead Poets Society would maintain, “Carpe diem, seize the day.

Gather ye rosebuds while ye may.”

Find what gives your life meaning and never let it go.

Myself? I study Theology and History as a double major and I write—I’m definitely not the best writer on campus, but I love it. I get to discuss things that matter with my readers and they in turn get to write in and respond, or find me at lunch and start a beautiful conversation.

When discussing concepts and beliefs, something surges through me—words and ideas turn into active proponents of change and not just abstract concepts.

Be an active participant with The Collegian, my fellow writers—I want to hear what you think. If you read a

piece that really moved you, write in and tell us about it. If something my co-religion writer, Randy Folkenberg, said gives you the chills, write in and tell him why. It’s always better to be an active participant than an inactive critic.

Nobody should coerce you to accept an idea or believe in something out of guilt or fear—that choice is rightly left to you. I can tell you about what I see, but it’s up to you to pour over the evidence and determine the argument’s value. Our beliefs influence every action we take, from our selection of attire to what we eat.

Establish your values and fight for the things you care about. Only you can pursue what gives your life meaning and gives warm breath to the cold dirt of our existence.

Want to be featured in the Religion section?

Questions? Comments?

Email us at: Benjamin.Ramey @wallawalla.edu or Randall.Folkenberg @wallawalla.edu

My name is Randy Folkenberg and I’m a junior theology major. This year my friend Benjamin and I hope to encourage you to make this great decision on a weekly basis. Many of you may associate the word “religion” with paragraph-long tongue twisters full of thus-es, thee-s, thou-s, and other archaic words.

Others of you may associate “religion” with the best days of your lives and with heart warming words like peace, consistency, forgiveness, fulfillment, and heaven. Others of you are sure to associate “religion” with some of the hardest days of your lives that make you think of words like stress, hypocrisy, condemnation, disappointment, or even hell.

Whatever your knee-jerk reaction is to the word “religion,” I ask that you set it aside as much as possible and in turn, be open to this page every week.

First of all, expect interesting content. We all know what it’s like to read religious material that sounds just like the Sabbath school lessons, Your Story Hour tapes, and simplified sermons we’ve heard in decades past.

On this page, we are going to make a deliberate effort not only to write in an interesting fashion, but also to cover topics that are relevant and important to college students who are growing in their personal understanding of God, whether as an ancient myth or as an ever-present Father.

Second, expect variety. One of the key components of higher education is growing our knowledge base. This

page will be no exception. To put it plainly, Benjamin and I view many, if not most, religious and theological things from different perspectives.

In other words, we disagree a lot.

But we are not haters! On this page we plan on taking time to present different and opposing positions on relevant religious topics in an effort to broaden your understanding of religion and of God. While Benjamin and I will write on a regular basis, we also plan on having fellow students write contributions to the page as Initial well as feature writings from notablegoing to individuals outside of our university.Back to Honestly, I’m pretty excited to read theheroic— page myself. the man Last, expect to be challenged. I knowacademi that there comes a time after long daysof real lif of studying when all the reading youmapping want to do is of memes on Facebook,a few ph but for the most part we read to learn,I’m here to be built up, to be challenged. If thisremain page does not challenge you and causewhy I w you to grow in your understanding of me illum God, don’t bother reading it. But I can inspired assure that this won’t be the case. lot of wh Besides our expectations for this page, there is one other thing we See, should all expect from this year:excited prepare for there to be bumps. Thereschool, c will frustration; there will be tiredness;disappoi there will be discomfort and therecollege t will be pain. How does this logicallurking c expectation and impending realitydarkenin affect us as we look forward to thisof my fr year? Should this make us look aheadonly th with dread or should it cause us tomy eye look ahead at all of eternity with hope?continui If your head is hurting, something isas if I liv not right. If your stomach is aching,hopeless you’ve got a problem. If a baby isabout em crying, something is not as it shouldabout th be. Yet somehow we see our friendsinsulates hurting, we feel our hearts aching,environm we constantly hear of families cryingthis dec over lost loved ones and we say, “Oh, between that’s just life.” Yes this is life today, educatio but it’s not life as it is meant to be or as achieves it will be. The hardships of this year only point to the beauty of eternity. You c Pain is an indicator of somethingOr mayb gone wrong. Something gone wrongthat you is an indicator of something thatfinancial should be made right. And this is thea good ultimate expectation: this world willclassmat be made right. are inter find hap

PERSPECTIVE

07

OPINION

to school or not to school?

ALEX

lemnah Perspective Editor Initially, the title of this article was going to be “Why I’m Not Coming Back to School.” It was going to be heroic—a last grand middle-finger to the man punctuating my turn from academics towards the blessed freedom of real life. Early in the summer I began mapping it out in my mind; I even had a few phrases penned by August. But I’m here, in school, and the article will remain unwritten. Before I get into why I won’t be writing that article, let me illuminate for you the process that inspired it. I think you’ll relate with a lot of what follows.

See, at some point between the excited confusion of graduating high school, college applications, and now, disappointment about this whole college thing crept into my life. The lurking cloud of disillusionment began darkening my skies towards the end of my freshman year. That cloud has only thickened since. Fortunately, my eyes have adjusted — and are continuing to adjust — and I don’t feel as if I live in the crippling darkness of hopeless expectations. I’m not talking about emotional darkness; I’m talking about the blanket of ignorance that insulates us from reality in a college environment. This unawareness, this deception, stems from the gulf between what we think a college education is for and what it actually achieves.

You came to college to learn, right?

Or maybe not. Maybe you’re here so that you can get a good job, ensure financial security, meet a spouse, have a good time, or keep up with your classmates. Maybe all of these reasons are interwoven into a vague desire to find happiness and it’s hard to identify

any one, specific reason. And maybe, just maybe, you really have no idea why you’re here. The scary thing about not knowing why you’re in college is that you probably don’t even know that you don’t know.

I’ve been told over and over in original and unoriginal ways that at the end of the day, college is supposed to “teach you how to think,” or “teach you how to learn,” or “teach you how to work.” I’ve been told to enjoy my four years, because it’s all about building relationships, enjoying myself, and getting a degree to show the world that I’m competent. I’ve been told all the junk that you’ve been told and, just like you, I believed too much of it. At the end of the day, college has nothing to do with us as individuals. Maybe it did long ago, when a few interested people gathered together to learn trades and exchange knowledge, but we’re too far removed from the early models of education to still buy into those core principles. No, the institution of collegiate education is no longer about you. It is about a collection of “yous.”

And yes, everything everyone says is true. It will teach you to think, learn, and work so that the hundreds of thousands of yous can be plugged like a cog into the machine of society and keep everything running smoothly.

Keep with me. I’m not just a longhaired hippie radical.

Think about the learning that actually occurs here on campus. I propose there are two types: learning that occurs inside the classroom and learning that occurs outside the classroom. The learning that occurs outside the classroom is the stuff of life: the experiences had, relationships formed, and internal processes that play out and result in growth.

Hopefully this growth is positive, but it isn’t always. Surprisingly enough, this growth — this thing we call “life” — doesn’t just happen on college campuses. No, this growth is in fact life itself and will happen wherever and whenever there is life. So, because life is inherently the great educator, we must all be here for the learning

that occurs inside the classroom, right?

I just registered for all of my courses for the year. Here’s how it went: After I was told what classes I would need to graduate, I went through the course lists and picked the classes that wouldn’t conflict with each other and would provide the credits I need to fulfill my degree requirements. Did the course titles really matter? The instructors? The syllabi? Of course not! We all know to ask what classes we “have” to take. It sounds odd to ask someone what classes they “get” to take. Granted, sometimes course material will overlap with our interests. This is why we declare majors: so that we can minimize how arbitrary, irrelevant, and uninteresting our program requirements will be. I am a declared English major, but this

The scary thing about not knowing why you’re in college is that you probably don’t even know that you don’t know. doesn’t mean I’m at all interested in grueling through advanced grammar courses or studying trite schools of criticism. To some of you, I may be coming off as an ungrateful, whiny, privileged prick who only wants to do what I want and doesn’t know the value of hard work. Higher education is a privilege, right?

I have yet to mention the cost of this classroom education that more than anything feels like a big, silly dance.

Because I sense this is a common frustration, I won’t spend much time trying to convince you that it’s asinine to spend tens of thousands of dollars you don’t have on classroom time that you don’t care that much about and that barely sets you up to pay off your ever-increasing debt. Yes, this self-perpetuating, inbred, and (might I say) elitist business of education is a

privilege. It’s a privilege from which, if I could do it over, I would excuse myself.

So then let me get to the point of the article: why I’m still here. I’ve walked you through the reasons why I was planning on not returning. In short, I can get the out-of-classroom education anywhere else in the world at any time, and a library card will get me all my inclassroom education and more. So, if I were the only person to account for in my universe, I would have checked out of this institution and never returned.

But I’ve been learning recently (even during vacation) that my journey is tied to dozens of others, and theirs with mine. My family, friends, church, and even distant acquaintances have all invested themselves so that I might satisfy the middle–class contemporary life requisite of earning a degree. I used to think college was the most selfish thing I have done, and I was right.

Every moment and dollar I spent was for me. Now, college seems like one of the more selfless things I can do. My reasons for remaining are as conflicted as the thing itself.

Now that I have relinquished my faith in the institution of education, I actually have more vision than before. Perhaps the fog I sensed in my first years wasn’t disappointment but was the illusion itself. Maybe I’ve developed intellectual “night vision,” or maybe the painful process of disillusionment has led me into clearer skies. Either way, the journey has been upward. And yes, this journey

has largely overlapped with my time in college and I am more than just financially indebted to this institution — or rather, to individuals within this institution. Individuals — friends, faculty, and peers — are the redeeming factor of my formal education.

So here’s the takeaway: before the fog overtakes you and blinds you to yourself and to reality, I suggest taking time to become an individual.

Distinguish the you from the yous.

Should you do this here in a collegiate “environment of learning,” or is this best done elsewhere? I suspect it’s better done somewhere where you aren’t encouraged to dive into a sinkhole of debt and unoriginality. I’m not saying college is a waste of time and money for everyone. There are those who know exactly where they want to go and who have rightfully determined that college is the best stepping stool to get there. Good for them. For the rest, college is a marvelously packaged safety net that promises security when individual intelligence and merit fails to do so. Do you really need to study business before you can work for one?

Before you can make one? Do I really need to study English before I can write a book? Often, it appears, the best in their respective trades don’t need this whole college thing. But there’s not a lot of sense considering stopping when you’ve already spent thousands of other peoples’ dollars — that is, unless you’re selfish enough.

Or would it be selfless? Ultimately, it’s up to you to decide.

I would like to keep the opinion column open to the voices of students wanting to be heard.

The above article contains bold, perhaps even inflammatory statements. Let my tone set a precedent of worry-free, conscientious writing. If you so choose, this column will be a forum for your writing. I want your articles with your thoughts.

You can let me worry about the filters. Submit articles to me at alex.lemnah@wallawalla.edu.

LIFE

0809

SNAPSHOTS

Snap

SHOTS

Photos by Erick Juarez

LIFE

09

HUMOR

HUMMUS, MY SWEET ONIONS Summer has ended—weep.

Classes have begun—screams of misery. George Clooney is no LAUREN longer single—all hope is lost. Now Humor Writer that we are back in the Onion Valley, it is the time to repeat scripted conversation about our summers for approximately two weeks.

lewis

These convos will be combined with awkward side hugs, unwanted full frontal hugs and handshakes with people you vaguely remember from years past.

Example: “You look familiar.”

Uncomfortable hug. “I’m pretty sure I met you at Waffle Wednesday last year.”

“Oh yes, I remember. You had Nutella all over your face and forearms.”

Before I slide into sardonic salutations, I must discuss, under the requisite two week contract, my summer. Sadly, my summer goals are incomplete and ongoing. The plans to watch all seasons of Friends, sit on the couch and study my cat, a fat and unhappy grey fluffball named Moose, are unfinished. Instead, my summer was filled with more lively activities. The most vigorous was a long backpacking trip with my father and aunt.

In 21 days, my legs carried my body and dragged a backpack along 220 miles of the John Muir Trail in California.

As my body hiked, blood rushed to my leg muscles and neglected my brain muscles. Many groundbreaking thoughts occurred to me during the most grueling trials. Below are a few of my genius revelations. I have titled this segment: “You’ve been in the woods too long if…” Enjoy.

… 75% of your conversations surround the smelly excretions that come from your crapshooter. Mine was tinted a yellow color today.

“...I hope this page brings you laughter, potty jokes, shenanigans, encouragement, bad advice, and a hint of naughtiness.”

… you consider murdering your hiking partners after they sing Friday by Rebecca Black repeatedly.

Remember, they don’t have Netflix in prison.

You’ve been in the woods too long if… … your infected blister makes your mouth water because the oozing puss reminds you of frosting. … your hiking partners begin comparing hiking gear to other objects. “I could never use a bivy sack.

It would be like pulling a giant condom over my sleeping bag every night.” … you laugh and scream in the face of a black bear as it tries to steal your toilet paper — a very precious commodity. Ain’t no one wanna gather and wipe with leaves. … you consider adding, “Never urinated on my legs in the woods” on your resume under “Achievements.”

… you have dirt permanently tattooed on your legs. … your leg hairs begin to collect lost ants and their fellow dead companions.

… you can identify other backpacker’s previous meals by the smelly farts wafting into your nostrils as you follow them up a trail. “Sir, did you have Backpackers Pantry’s beef stew last night?” … you’ve seen multiple genitals and butt cheeks as you follow hikers traversing granite steps while wearing hiking kilts, skirts or short shorts, commando style. The best way to hike!

Despite some of the unsightly things we may experience on a backpacking trip, they are the greatest adventures.

Before the weather becomes cold and soggy, get outside and enjoy the wonders of nature!

Throughout the school year I hope this page brings you laughter, potty jokes, shenanigans, encouragement, bad advice and a hint of naughtiness.

I would attempt to bring you moral support, but alas, my morals are a tad bit questionable. Welcome back to WWU! Prepare yourself for a fantastical school year.

http://upload.wikimedia.org/

thecollegian

SNAPCHAT

LIFE

1011

FOOD

A BETTER BREAKFAST RACHEL

peterson

After living in Walla Walla this summer I am excited that the campus is filled with students again. It’s that time of year when I start looking forward to carving pumpkins, going to the corn maze, playing intramural flag football. I begin to crave sugar and spice and everything nice. Baking

delicious goodies is one of my favorite parts of fall. This quick and easy recipe fits the fall mood and is convenient to eat between classes or on the go. Who needs to buy Kashi granola when you can make your own? This is definitely a recipe you want to keep.

Collegian

POSITIONS

Head News Editor

Food Writer I’d love to get feedback from you! Send me an email if you have any comments or suggestions for recipes you’d like to see featured at: Rachel.Peterson@ wallawalla.edu

Layout Designer APPLY NOW Visit ASWWU.com and select Work for ASWWU! from the dropdown menu Fill out the form and send it to aswwu.collegian@wallawalla.edu.

Rachel Peterson

Feature

RECIPE: OATMEAL COOKIE GRANOLA

(Can Be Made Vegan and Gluten free)

Preparation time: 10 minutes Cooking time: 30 minutes Number of servings: 12

I N G R E D I E N TS 2 ¼ cups old-fashioned (gluten free optional) rolled oats 1 cup sliced almonds ½ cup ground chia seeds (ground in blender of coffee grinder) 1 tablespoon brown sugar (or beet sugar) 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon ½ teaspoon salt

½ cup honey 4 tablespoons coconut oil 2 teaspoons vanilla extract ½ cup chocolate chips (you can use gluten-free, vegan, soy free – the Enjoy Life is a good option; I just used dark chocolate in my version) ½ cup dried fruit (I used dried cherries)

I N ST R U C T I O N S 1. Preheat the oven to 325 degrees and line a baking sheet with parchment paper.

2. In a large bowl, stir together the oats, almonds, chia seeds, sugar, cinnamon, and salt.

3. In a small pot combine the honey, coconut oil, and vanilla — heat so that the ingredients all melt together.

4. Pour the mixture over the oats and stir until all of the granola is coated. Spread it evenly over the parchment-lined baking sheet.

5. Bake for 10 minutes then toss the granola.

6. Bake another 10 minutes and then toss again.

7. Bake another 10 minutes, but toss at the 5 minute mark and right after you pull the granola out at the end.

8. Let the granola cool completely and then toss in the chocolate chips and the dried fruit and stir together.

Store in an airtight container or bag.

Recipe from: heatherchristo.com

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LIFE

11

TRAVEL

TIME FOR A

NEW ADVENTURE

Last year, I spent my time studying in France hoping to come away with some knowledge of French. So for a good portion of those who read my section, you don’t know me. This will be my first impression and hopefully it will convince you to read my section. I love traveling and the adventure that goes along with it. Writing is one of my favorite ways to communicate. I can be very social, but I prefer to be alone to read a book and I’m easily won over by coffee.

I’ve been to about 17 countries in my life and I can safely say that I love getting lost. It may be an odd thing to love, but when I allow myself to get lost, I don’t feel like a tourist anymore.

I’m allowing adventure to take me by the hand and show me the best places to eat, to observe, and to get a new perspective of the city. If I’m a tourist, I stay on the path laden with street vendors pushing their products and that’s where pockets get picked.

I’ve done the tourist things, of course, but I don’t spend my whole time doing them.

of us. We started piling through the door, causing this door bell to go off every time we passed the sensor. This quiet, yet full room of people looked up from their meals to stare. We awkwardly sat down and throughout the whole meal we tried hard not to laugh aloud – we got many glares and curious stares from the other patrons.

By the time we finished, it was almost midnight and everyone was trying to pay and leave.

However, there was only one server that night and no one could get her attention. So my friend stood up and walked over to the door to set the bell off. Everyone whipped their heads around to see the server peek her head out, but when she saw that no one new had entered the building she slipped back into the kitchen.

Meanwhile, everyone in the restaurant started laughing because they realized we all wanted to leave. Finally we were able to pay and everyone left at the same time, so that bell went off for a good two minutes. Once outside, we started laughing hysterically which caught a group of guys’ attention, so they started catcalling animal noises in our direction. This made us laugh even harder, but also encouraged us to run for a few blocks.

“...when I allow myself to get lost, I don’t feel like a tourist anymore.”

SHANNON

pierce

Travel & Local Writer

John Llennon Wall, Prague

Shannon Pierce stands with fellow WWU ACA students James Norton, Bryce Bower, Jon Spracklen, Colin Pummel, and Ryan Robinson in front of the Eiffel Tower.

A magical moment captured at the fountain at Promenade du Paillon in Nice, France.

aswwu video

One night in May when we were down in Nice, a bunch of us went out to find a Chinese restaurant. That night we were obviously Americans.

We walked in the wrong direction for 10 minutes, so we settled on a nice Thai place instead. The things you have to know about French dining is it’s very quiet, they take their time eating, servers aren’t assigned to one specific table, and in most establishments you seat yourself. Well, there were eight

Last year was, hands down, my favorite year. This is my cliche mark of the year: it’s time for a new adventure. We may be in a new place, or an old one, but we all get another year to try something new.

Collegian

WISDOM Restaurant owner serves food laced with opium to hook customers.

- What a downer.

Man staring at iPad causes airport evacuation.

-Product considered weapon of mass distraction.

Game of Thrones fan stabs intruder with medieval sword.

-Valour Morghulis

Thousands flock to ‘anti-Facebook.’

-Dislike

Bonne chance!

University of Rochester develops ‘cloaking device.’

-They can’t find it

vimeo.com/aswuu

Thursdays at 9:37 p.m.

If you could talk to your younger self, what would you say? Several WWU students reflect on their college years so far and offer helpful advice to those transitioning into university life.

Woman sues Disney, says Frozen was based off her life story.

-Let it go.

LIFE

12 13

CULTURE

the kaleidoscope

TELESCOPE

Taylor Swift: With the new single “Shake It Off,” Swift once again sweeps the world with her sassy pop message to the “haters.” The catchy song broke the record for the highest debut ever on Adult Pop Songs of Billboard’s radio airplay chart.

SCOPE Noah Gundersen: Our friend Noah is selling his exclusive new EP entitled “Twenty-something” only during the shows on his fall tour. It was recorded live with Gundersen, his guitar, and an analog tape.

MICROSCOPE This is YOUR spot!

New discoveries, far and near.

Songs, books, art, it’s shared right here.

If you or someone you know has anything they would likefeatured, let me know! Whether it’s painting, music, spoken word, short film, poetry, performance, or craft, I want to know about it. Message me at river.davis@wallawalla.edu or on Facebook with a link or picture and a short description.

I REALLY DON’T KNOW THAT MUCH I used to think culture was simply what we hear on the radio and see on TV, but it turns out there is a lot I don’t know.

RIVER

davis Culture Writer

I dismounted my longboard and pulled open the door to the dingy pawnshop in downtown Spokane.

The room was filled with old car stereos and subwoofers, a row of cheap beat-up guitars and knock-off amps.

Picking up a faded Yamaha acoustic, I ran my fingers across the corroded strings only to produce a nasty, outof-tune chord that rang through the store. “Beautiful, isn’t it?”

I jumped with a start. Behind me was a little Filipino man wearing an old Walkman. “Um, yes, it’s alright,” I said politely, trying to decide when

would be a good time to start backing away. He took the guitar and ran his rough hands down the chipped neck.

“This is a beautiful guitar,” he spoke softly, a faraway tone in his voice. He turned his eyes on me and smiled. “Do you know what music is?” I squinted at him as I tried to formulate an answer.

“Well, I guess technically it’s sets of notes and chords put together to make songs,” I suggested. Apparently that was incorrect.

He leaned in and knocked his knuckles on my longboard. Thunk thunk thunk. “THAT’S music!” he proclaimed excitedly. “Listen to the buses screech outside. That’s music!” He strummed the old guitar again. “Even that’s music! Music is everywhere,” he ended with a whisper. He cracked

another smile and set down the instrument. He may or may not have been completely mentally present, but he schooled me.

Honestly, I really don’t know that much. I like to think I do, but I really don’t. I could easily feed you all my favorite songs and claim to know ALL about the underground Portland scene just because I listen to Beautiful Eulogy, or preach about the art of spoken word just because I watch Anis Modgani YouTube videos. On the other hand, I can count on my fingers the number of books that I have read in the last few years, and I hardly ever go to the cinema. But the man in the pawnshop taught me something different. There are so many perspectives

on culture and so much depth in art that it is impossible to be an “expert”.

So let’s make a deal. Join me on this journey. This column hopefully won’t just be a few paragraphs of me blabbering about my favorite songs. It will be an account of the things that I am determined to learn about the culture around me, whether it’s attending a seedy poetry reading in downtown Portland or going to a Justin Bieber concert just to see what the hype is about. I want to replace my assumptions with raw reality, and I want you to come along on the adventure. So I really don’t know that much, but I’m willing to dive in and blow my assumptions to bits. And you never know, we might both learn something.

LIFE

13

FASHION

FASHION MONTH WRAP-UP “Fashion is a form of artistic self-expression and like any art form, more than being understood, it must be felt.”

Hugo Boss

Fashion Month, the time when prominent designers showcase their new collections for the upcoming season, just wrapped up. Fashion Month takes place both in February and September, starting in NYC, then London, Milan, and lastly Paris.

Since it’s fall right now, designers displayed looks for spring and summer 2015. “So what’s the big deal?” you may ask. Fashion is always in the future. However, fashion events play a bigger role in your life than you realize. Trends in fashion are highly influenced by what comes down the h in artcatwalk during fashion month. Lines expert”. such as H&M and Forever21 pull e on thistheir inspiration from the collections. ly won’t me blabs. It will hat I am e culture nding a wntown n Bieber hype is assumpwant you ure. So I but I’m assumpnow, we

It is very likely that you are wearing something right now that was inspired by a piece on the runway. These high fashion designers have a large impact: they determine what direction the industry heads.

I have met many people who don’t understand what they see on the runway. They say, “No one would wear that in real life.” I admit I have thought the same, but many people don’t realize there is a beautiful fairytale-like side of fashion that goes beyond function. Fashion is a form of artistic self-expression and like any art form, more than being understood, it must be felt.

@zimmerbladez

Delpozo

Fendi

DID YOU KNOW? Companies like H&M and Target often do collaborations with fashion designers. The Target collaboration with designer Altuzarra came out a few weeks ago—I snatched up one of those lovely dresses fast! Soon to launch is H&M x Alexander Wang on November 6. This is the perfect way to get your hands on designer pieces without designer prices.

ALYSSA

hartwick Fashion Writer

CollegianFashion

INSTAGRAM Follow the official Collegian fashion instagram for campus street style @CollegianFashion

@gfp6302

@malulani94

@shinelikethestars96

@gfp6302

PERSPECTIVE

1415

SCIENCE

we have to go deeper: DANIEL

hulse Science Editor Hello and welcome to the Science and Technology column. Before I get into this year’s first issue, here’s some background about me: I am a senior mechanical engineering major. I use desktop Linux on a day-to-day basis.

I might have even graded your math homework at some point. If I could describe myself with one word, it would be “deep,” which, as it turns out, is going to be a recurring theme with this column — taking ordinary and common things and looking at some of the science behind them so you can be better informed and make better decisions.

For example, you might have heard that the iPhone 6+ has a bad bending problem — it can bend permanently if the right forces are applied (i.e. in the pocket of your super-tight skinny jeans

“what you may not have seen is that the flexibility of phones has actually been tested scientifically.”

the science behind the iphone bend test of other similar phones. This was done using a three-point flexural test, a fairly common test for finding out how well a sample of material bends.

In the test, two ends of the object (in this case a smartphone) are held in one place while a force is applied to the center until the object deforms, at which point the applied force is recorded.

What the Consumer Reports bend test found was the HTC One M8 and the iPhone 6 both bent at 70 pounds, the iPhone 6+ bent at 90 pounds, and the LG G3 and iPhone 5 bent at 130 pounds. The Galaxy Note 3, the champ of the group, bent at 150 pounds. For reference, Apple designs the iPhone to perform at greater than 55 pounds at this test, or roughly the breaking force of 3 pencils.1 So while the iPhone 6 was one of the weaker phones of the group, all of the phones were strong enough to withstand normal use.

So why are the HTC One and iPhone 6 so much weaker than the

wwwbgr.com

other phones at this test? The answer may seem counter-intuitive, but it is fairly simple as far as I can tell. If you look at both of the phones, you’ll find they both have an aluminum back. While aluminum is a fairly nice material to make phones out of because of its premium feel and apparent inability to corrode, it’s also one of the more bendable metals — it has one of the lower moduli of elasticity (the measure of a material’s overall stiffness before it begins to permanently bend or deform) of the metals. Plastic, on the other hand, is in general much stiffer than metal, and therefore has a much higher modulus of elasticity.

“there’s always going to be a trade-off between the durability of plastic phones and the aesthetics of metal phones.”

As a result, the plastic phones, the LG G3 and the Galaxy Note, score better on the bend test because plastic, oddly enough, is stronger than metal (stick this in the footer: or, more accurately, stiffer — strength refers to the amount

that you, for whatever reason, decided to run a marathon in.) You might have even seen a Youtube video of someone bending the iPhone 6+ with their bare hands and comparing that to a similar test with a Samsung Galaxy Note, the obvious winner being the Note.

But what you may not have seen is that the flexibility of phones has actually been tested scientifically.

Consumer Reports did a study and found that, while the iPhone 6 models bent more easily than the iPhone 5, they were still in the bending range

stress a material can take before it breaks completely while stiffness refers to the amount of stress a material can take before it bends permanently in a three-point flexural test).

In a way, this means that unless the structural engineering of phones makes some massive leap, there’s always going to be a trade-off between the durability of plastic phones and the aesthetics of metal phones. So the next time you consider buying a phone, it might be good to remember that while the metal phones do look nicer and feel better in your hands, plastic phones are much, much more durable.

That was just one example of the sort of article you can expect from this column over the next weeks. If you have any article ideas for me, feel free to send me an email at daniel.hulse@ wallawalla.edu or find me on campus.

I’ll probably be in Kretschmar.

1.

http://www.consumerreports.org/cro/

news/2014/09/consumer-reports-testsiphone-6-bendgate/index.htm

www.stuff.co.nz

PERSPECTIVE

15

SPORTS

THIS IS WHERE

it begins

ALEX

wagner Sports Editor

When I was in the second grade, my class had a greenhouse and we were all given a few bean seeds. When I placed one in a small plastic cup filled with soil, I had crazy hopes and dreams, wishing for some sort of giant bean stalk to take off and crash through the roof. Spoiler alert: that didn’t happen.

But after a few days, when a healthy little green plant sprouted up, I was pumped. Seeing the emergence of the seed and its subsequent growth was a rewarding experience.

Growth and emergence are two words that are used fairly often in the world of sports when it comes to evaluating players, teams, and organizations. In this past year we have seen the growth of NBA guards Damian Lillard, DeMar DeRozan, and John Wall, going from nice, young players to allstars, helping their teams advance into the playoffs. In baseball, guys like Jose Abreu of the Chicago White Sox and Josh Harrison of the Pittsburgh Pirates came out of nowhere, becoming critical pieces to their respective teams.

Led by a multitude of mid-to-late round draft picks (including 4th- and 5th-round draft picks Russell Wilson

& Richard Sherman), the Seahawks emerged as Super Bowl champions.

Like I said, the process of growth really can be rewarding.

This year on campus we have a chance to be part of the development of an athletic program headed in the right direction. Several moves have been made in the last few months that really give me confidence.

Gerry Larson, the new athletic director for WWU, took over this past summer and has already been pushing the program in the right direction. It has been confirmed that the Wolves will no longer be a NAIA independent.

Instead, beginning in the 2015-16 season we will be joining the Cascade Collegiate Conference which is also part of the NAIA. This is important because the Wolves will now have a more competitive schedule, leading to more opportunities for recognition of athletic and academic achievements.

There will definitely be a bit of transition period as the program moves from where it was to where it wants to be when joining the conference next year. Larson is very upbeat and optimistic about the future: “We are very excited about this transition year for Wolves Athletics. We are looking forward to the exciting developments that will unfold over the next ten months.

These changes should greatly improve the Walla Walla University Athletics experience for the student-athlete and the Walla Walla community.”

Along with leading the move to the conference, Larson has played a hand in helping recruit student athletes into the program, including many freshman on this year’s volleyball team. The Wolves volleyball season is already underway. I’ve had a few chances to watch them play. For a team that is primarily made up of freshman, there has been a lot of growth and improvement already, and it’s a lot of fun to watch. Coach Don Hepker is doing a great job. The returning players — Melissa Barton, Alissa Casey, Maria Darling, and Amanda Preston — are helping the team out with their play and leadership.

Soccer season has kicked off and will continue for several more weeks.

With a solid core of returning players and some new players, they are set to continue in the right direction.

Featuring: Luke Spady

Featuring: Lauren Barlow

The men’s basketball team ended last season on a high note and is bound to build on that success. I can tell you, they are going to be very exciting to follow. There will be more on them in a couple of weeks, as there will be with women’s basketball and softball.

In the coming school year, I want to share the growth and emergence of Walla Walla’s athletic program. I am excited to follow these teams, and I hope you all support them by coming out and watching them play. Going to games is a fun, free activity that takes place right here on campus and I have to say it does create school spirit, which can’t hurt right? Go Wolves!

SPORTS SCHEDULE Volleyball

Soccer

Oct 13 – Multnomah University 6:30 pm

Oct 14 – Whitman College 7:00 pm

Oct 20- Blue Mountain Community College 7:00 pm

Oct 18 – Multnomah University 7:30 pm

Oct 25 & 26 – Northwest Indian College (TBA)

Oct 24 – Trinity Lutheran 3:00 pm

Featuring: Tyreek Luckett

Afterwords

NEVER TAKE THE STAIRS Have you ever had one of those moments...

CARLY

YAEGER Afterwords Writer

in my closet all winter long until the right season), and go on a run outside.

Now, I am not a runner, but I had taken Linnae’s jogging class, and figured,

that made you feel like such a total moron that it pains you to even recall it? A moment that, whether witnessed by friends or random bystanders, was so painfully embarrassing that you couldn’t even laugh about it afterwards?

It was the first sunny day of last spring, finally blue-skied and warm out. I decided to take advantage of this shocking phenomenon, put on my bright pink Nikes (which I had saved

“Ehh, why not?”

After about the hardest, hottest 30 minutes of my life, I finally got back to Foreman and faced the difficult decision: to take the stairs or not to take the stairs. At that point, I pulled it together and jauntily high-kneed my way up. First floor was easy, second floor: cake.

Third floor is where things went downhill.

“

– Terry Gottschall

“Say yes to condoms; say no to minivans.”

- Carolyn Green

“The freshman 15 will now be the freshman 50 with the new soft serve in the caf.”

“

-Brennan Hoenes

Wham!

Flat on my face. I didn’t even want to get up to check if anyone was around. After a few shameful seconds, I finally lifted myself off the floor just in time for the elevator doors to open

They had heard the massive thump and wondered if someone had “dropped a brick or something.” At least they were concerned about my brick.

#kindanice. #neverrunningagain. #obscene.

and release the entire Walla Walla maintenance crew.

Collegian

VERBATIM

“Have I talked about how Bill Gates is the anti-Christ?”

Exhaustion set in, but I climbed on. It felt like Everest, but at last I reached 6th floor… I gained extra pep in my step as my foot left the final stair. I had nearly made it when my shoe caught the end of the step and

CONFIDENTIAL

HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED...

Dear Carly, Who was that hottie talking up the Chemistry Club at Welcome Back Bash? Please tell me he’s single!

? ...why only freshmen hashtag college? #collegelife -Taylor D.

...why cars never stop at the crosswalk in the winter, but always stop when it’s warm out?

-Shawn E.

Dear Carly, Can I have a girlfriend at college and a girlfriend back home or is that wrong?

If you have a quote for Verbatim, or a “Have You Ever Wondered?” to mention, e-mail me at Carly.Yaeger@wallawalla.edu.

For confessions, check out Collegian-Confidential on Tumblr.