Volume 99, Issue 2

THE WALLA WALLA UNIVERSITY

collegian VOLUME 99 | ISSUE 2 | 9 OCTOBER 2014

viral conflicts THREE PROFILES OF VIOLENT EPIDEMICS EBOLA

UKRAINE

ISIS

TRAVEL | 10

Don’t be frightened by this week’s cover – we weren’t attempting to sensationalize the horrific events that are continuing to unfold in places like West Africa, Ukraine, and Iraq. These catastrophes are ongoing situations, and each of them could have implications on American life. The feature story this week is a comprehensive breakdown of these emerging conflicts.

RICKY

Living on such a beautiful campus in a peaceful valley, it’s easy to get consumed in the smaller ups and downs of college existence. Should we really be concerned with the unpleasant business of empathizing with the rest of the world? Will these threats be hitting closer to home in the near future?

Photo by Erick Juarez

Editor’s Letter & Table of Contents | 2 News | 3 Senate & Info | 4 News & Portland | 5 Photos | 6 Week in Forecast | 7

02 context EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ricky Barbosa ASSISTANT EDITOR Karl Wallenkampf HEAD LAYOUT EDITOR Mindy Robinson HEAD COPY EDITOR Andrea Johnson HEAD PERSPECTIVE EDITOR Alex Lemnah HEAD LIFE EDITOR Carolyn Green

Opinion | 8 Religion | 9 Feature | 10-13

08 perspective AFTERWORDS WRITER Carly Yaeger

SCIENCE & TECH EDITOR Daniel Hulse

CREATIVE WRITER & COLUMNIST Abigail Wissink

SPORTS WRITER & PROMOTION MANAGER Alex Wagner

CULTURE EDITOR River Davis FASHION WRITER Alyssa Hartwick

Within the 24 pages of The Collegian this week, you’ll find a robust selection of information, entertainment, and opinions. You’ll find an ode to poetry, a cheat sheet to ASWWU’s lesser known services, and a killer quinoa salad recipe. I encourage you to keep an eye on the local events and to enjoy the vast array of content! But above all, I call you to think critically about current events, join the discussion, and affect change.

You’re more than capable.

Photo by Alyssa Hartwick

Editor-in-Chief

images.christianpost.com

BARBOSA

I challenge you, reader, to educate yourself on what is happening around this world that we share. A catastrophe isn’t important because it happens at home; it’s important because it happens to people. Gather the facts and decide what you can do to make a difference!

TRAVEL & LOCAL EDITOR Shannon Pierce

FOOD EDITOR Rachel Peterson

COPY EDITOR Kayla Albrecht Rachel Blake Tyler Jacobson

HUMOR WRITER & OFFICE MANAGER Lauren Lewis

DISTRIBUTION MANAGER Zachary Johnson

NEWS WRITERS Savannah Kisling Morgan Sanker

LAYOUT DESIGNERS Matthew Moran Ian Smith

RELIGION EDITORS Randy Folkenberg Benjamin Ramey

ASWWU HEAD PHOTO EDITOR Erick Juarez

14 life

Food | 14 Culture | 15 Creative Writing | 16-17 #thecollegian | 18 Humor | 19 Travel | 20 Fashion | 21 Science | 22 Sports | 23 AfterWords | 24

If you are interested in contributing to The Collegian, contact our section editors, page writers, or the editor-in-chief at aswwu.collegian@wallawalla.edu. The Collegian is boosted by regularly incorporating a wide range of student perspectives.

Cover Credit: tarnews.co.za The Collegian is the official publication of ASWWU. Its views and opinions are not necessarily the official stance of Walla Walla University or its administration, faculty, staff, or students. Questions, letters, and comments can be sent to aswwu.collegian@wallawalla.edu or richard.barbosa@ wallawalla.edu. This issue was completed at 5:42 a.m. on Thursday, October 9, 2014.

For information about advertising, please contact Shandra Cady at aswwu.ads@wallawalla.edu.

The Collegian | Volume 99, Issue 2 | 204 S. College Avenue, College Place, WA 99324 | collegian.wallawalla.edu

or

(the

CONTEXT

03

NEWS

lasagna or enchiladas?

(the longest table)

Seven WWU students and one professor traveled to Pucutuni, Peru, this last September to SAVANNAH complete a project for the small village in the AnNews Writer des Mountains.

The goal of the most recent trip was to build a working, gravity-fed water system in Pucutuni, to collect data for an upcoming EWB project in Pampa Chiri, and to strengthen relations with members in the community there.

kisling

5 Writing |

Students Wesley Centerwall, Josue Hernandez, Alexa Luke, Chris Ghazal, Braden Andersen, and Leighton Edward, traveled to the small village with Dr. Curtis Nelson and professional mentor Jim Wodrich. Because of the Mac Ford

gian | 18 9

21 22 3 s | 24

ENGINEERS WITHOUT BORDERS SUCCESSFUL IN PERU

MORGAN

sanker News Writer The highly-anticipated annual Longest Table potluck took place on Saturday, October 4th on 4th Street alongside Kretchmar Hall and the University Church. Hungry souls were excited to devour a plethora of casseroles and accept the love of University Church members.

Preparation for this event included church members signing up to host tables and greet students, as well as the recruitment of the WWU soccer team to set up and tear down the event.

On the morning of the joyous event, energy ran high and appetites bearing the same ravenous spirit could not be placated. The promise of home-cooked meals rang in the hearts of all; hope was as far as the eye could see.

extreme altitude of Pucutuni (14,000 ft), the working conditions were quite chilly; the team even saw snow one day.

Besides altitude, Pucutuni had a unique set of challenges in completing the project. Alpaca made the water unsafe to drink, they had no electricity, and the water system had to be moved to a new location away from a landslide zone.

“Our work included improving their spring source catchment system, laying hundreds of meters of pipe, building a concrete foundation for two 2500 L water tanks, building four concrete tap stands, and finally connecting all the pipes to the spring source, the two tanks, and the tap stands,” EWB President Leighton Edward said. “We successfully completed our project.”

The WWU students also took the opportunity to educate the community on how their new water system worked and the importance of keeping grazing animals away from the source.

The water system was researched and designed completely by students. It was funded by their efforts as well; the majority of EWB’s fundraising is done during the school year at several major events, the largest of which is the gala during winter quarter.

Besides starting a new water project in Pampa Chiri, EWB is currently in the process of working on a water project to impact the Walla Walla valley.

If you would like more information about EWB or want to get involved, contact Leighton Edward (leighton. edward@wallawalla.edu) or Ian Cooke (ian.cooke@wallawalla.edu).

“Fun, food, and fellowship” are what Melissa Guzman anticipated from The Longest Table. She also relayed that she “was very excited to go meet different families in our community” and that “getting to know new students is always a great experience . . . almost as much as Mexican food is!”

Upon arriving at the event, all participants were forced to make the hardest decision of the day: lasagna or enchiladas? Curry or piroshkis?

Tres leches cake or made-with-loveand-a-mother’s-touch brownies? In essence, everyone was forced to make this decision: Which group of loving church members should we devote ourselves to for this short but dear experience?

The choices culminated into a heterogeneous assortment from around the globe: India, Russia, Mexico, Thailand, Italy and many more countries. Appetites were satisfied and hearts were made full. Everyone went their separate ways with happiness on their minds and smiles in their hearts.

The Longest Table outdid itself once again.

Photos from: EWB – WWU

NEWS

0405

ASWWU

ASWWU FOR YOU VOTEFOR Senate

UPDATE

SENATORS

THE TREAD SHED

on

Who We Are: The Tread Shed is a bicycle repair shop that offers free repairs and tune-ups for any type of bicycle – all you pay for is the parts!

OCTOBER

14

Campus advancement, inquisitive discussion, passionate service, and a lasting legacy: these embody ASWWU Senate. Your significant contribution to maintaining a powerful student voice on campus is crucial: ASWWU Senate energizes student life by funding tangible and intangible improvements– from water-bottle fillers to Hillsong-style vespers.

Vote for ASWWU Senate.

ASWWU Bikes: The ASWWU bikes are maintained by the Tread Shed for your enjoyment. Please treat them nicely. Also, please don’t ride them if they are broken. Just drop the broken bike by the tread shed and we will fix it and bring it back out for you to use.

ASWWU OUTDOORS

Location: Small garage/shed with a red door behind (east) of the Atlas.

Mission Statement: ASWWU Outdoors is committed to increasing enthusiasm for the outdoors, promoting outdoor education, and making new outdoor activities accessible for WWU students while strengthening and developing new connections with fellow students and Christ.

Hours: Tuesday-Thursday: 12:00 pm - 4:00 pm

Outdoor Group Email Lists: These are a great way to connect with other students and friends who love to do the same outdoor activities as you! Join a group and you will receive group messages and have the ability send messages to the entire group easily. These groups are great for planning your own trips with friends and fellow outdoor enthusiasts.

Available Groups: Backcountry (for backcountry skiers and snowboarders) Backpacking (for hiking- and backpacking-related activities) Camping Climbing (for rock climbing and other mountaineering) Mountain Biking Paddling (for kayaking, canoeing, rafting, and other water activities involving a paddle) Surfing

MOUNTAIN RENTS

Who We Are: We rent out outdoor gear: river rafts to backpacks to cross country skis to mountain bikes to waterfilters.

Go to the ASWWU website and look under ASWWU – Mountain Rents to find the entire list of gear we offer.

Location: North side of Kellogg Hall, just around the corner from the SAC

Send an email to ASWWU.Outdoors@wallawalla.edu to request to be added to a group or to suggest a new group that you would like to start.

Hours: Monday: 5:30 pm - 7:30 pm Thursday: 5:30 pm - 7:30 pm

AIN S

NEWS

05

VARIOUS

Senior ANNOUNCEMENT Hey Seniors!

Collegian

POSITIONS

Head News Editor

Don’t forget that your graduation contract and senior outline are due tomorrow:

WELCOME TO PORTLAND

Layout Designer RIVER

APPLY NOW Visit ASWWU.com and select Work for ASWWU! from the dropdown menu Fill out the form and send it to aswwu.collegian@ wallawalla.edu.

davis

“Let’s see. I merge south from I-84 to the 205 in three miles.

Shoot, is that 205 North or South?”

The rain patters against my Culture Writer windshield and blurs the big city lights as I try to navigate through the legendary metropolis of Portland. I am on my way to nursing school and the rain started falling almost on cue as if Portland herself were welcoming me into her strange and diverse family. I finally find my way to SE Market Street and the tiny campus next to the big hospital. The rain falls lightly on my shoulders as I trundle to Hansen Hall, which looks slightly deserted due to my early, nocturnal arrival.

“Welcome! I’m glad you got here safe. Here is your room key, and let

aswwu video vimeo.com/aswwu

Thursdays at 9:37 p.m.

Watch the To Build a Home update from the ASWWU video team!

me know if you need anything else,” the dean said cheerfully. I silently moved into my room and finally sat down in my bungee chair when it was all finished.

It already feels a long way from Walla Walla. I have heard we are generally a little forgotten over here, and I can see why this could happen: the big city, this little campus, a few relatively devoted nursing students. But as I feel melancholy at the thought of saying goodbye to the festivities of main campus, I listen to the steady rain pounding at my window. New adventures fill my mind.

Hipsters, coffee shops, food carts, the coast, Portlandia, real clinicals, I.V.s, concerts, evergreens, and the ultimate goal of becoming an RN finally seem so close I can taste them. And as rain pattered against my dark window that night, I could almost hear it saying,“Welcome, River. Welcome to Portland.”

October 10 If you haven’t already, make plans to meet with your advisor to make sure you’re on track for your last year. You’ll also want to make sure you know about any senior projects or exit exams you’ll need from your department.

Congratulations, you’re almost there!

context

0607

SNAPSHOTS

Snap

Photos by Erick Juarez

SHOTS

NEWS

07

WEEK IN FORECAST

Week in

FORECAST 10 09 THURSDAY

October 9

1 79°

12

FRIDAY 2

October 10 79°

Timothy Torres

Timothy Torres

Erick Juarez

Timothy Torres

11 SATURDAY 2

October 11 73°

Andrews University PT Interviews: Campus Center, 8:00-5:00 P.M.

Week of Worship: University Church, 11:40 A.M. Speaker: Pr. Iki Taimi

Biology Club at Jubilee Lake All Day

Week of Worship: University Church, 11:40 A.M. Speaker: Pr. Iki Taimi

Swim Club’s Clinic: WEC Gym, 2:00 P.M.

Sabbath Seminar CTC 105, 10:30 A.M. Speaker: Martha Mason

Graduate School Fair: Kellogg Hall, 4:00 - 7:00 P.M.

Vespers: University Church, 8:00 P.M. Business Club Manhunt: University Church steps after Vespers

Drama Club Movie Night Black Box, 8:00 P.M.

14

October 12

1 70°

Chamber Series Recital FAC Auditorium, 7:30 P.M. Joseph Brooks

UPCOMING EVENTS

Impact by BSCF: Conard Hall Chapel, 9:30 P.M.

13

SUNDAY

15

Surf Trip: October 17-19

Photos by Erick Juarez

MONDAY

Octobor 13

W 72°

October 24-26

Kurtis Lamberton

Mason Neil

Erick Juarez

Family Weekend:

TUESDAY 2

October 14 66°

ASWWU CommUnity: WEC Gym, 11:00 A.M. Hispanic Ministries Worship: Prayer House, 8:00 P.M.

WEDNESDAY W

October 15

Service Day: CTC Bowl, 8:00 A.M.

66°

perspective

0809

OPINION

THE “PROBLEM”

OF HOMOSEXUALITY MICAH

hall Contributing Writer My name is Micah Hall, and I am contributing to The Collegian this week. You may remember me from my work as a columnist last year.1 I thought writing about something other than myself2 would be a nice change of pace, so I was very excited when I was asked to write this week.

I want to state upfront that I firmly believe there is no Biblical precedent against same-sex relationships, and that God blesses committed same-sex relationships in the same way he would heterosexual relationships. However, this article isn’t about that.

I have talked to a lot of people here at Walla Walla University about the issue the church has with homosexuality. I have friends who believe celibacy is the only option for someone “struggling” with homosexuality; I have friends who believe, like I do, that there is no Biblical reason to condemn same-

sex relationships, and there are many people in-between. There is one thing that every person, every church, and every theologian seems to agree on: we should treat LGBTQIA Christians with the love and acceptance that Christ would.

However, I don’t want to spend this article arguing about the possible interpretations of the few Biblical passages involving same-sex, sexual encounters. If you want to talk to me about these things in person,

I was talking with some friends about the experiences homosexuals have had in the Adventist church.

In almost every story, the church’s response to their sexual orientation was the same: you may attend our church, but you may not preach, teach Sabbath school classes, or sing praise music. In other words, you can sit in our church services, but you may not contribute to the body of Christ.

ent kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.” – 1st Corinthians 12:4-6

This begs the question: what role do LGBTQIA Christians have in the church? Even if being attracted to someone of the same gender is a sin, it doesn’t make that person any less able to tell a children’s story or sing special music.

We need to start accepting people fully into the body of Christ. “Loving the sinner” but not allowing them to be a full member of our community doesn’t show love. Christ didn’t tell us to “love the sinner, but hate the sin.” He said we should love the sinner but hate our own sin. When confronted about the adulterous woman,3 Jesus didn’t tell the Pharisees to love her but hate what she did; he said, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.”

“We need to start accepting people fully into the body of Christ. ‘Loving the sinner’ but not allowing them be a full member of our community doesn’t show love.”

I will be happy to discuss them with you. This article is about how we should treat LGBTQIA Christians, not about what you believe.

“There are different kinds of gifts, but the same Spirit distributes them.

There are different kinds of service, but the same Lord. There are differ-

Even if being part of the LGBTQIA is a sin, it doesn’t inhibit a person’s ability to serve the church, but we, as a church, act like it does.

When was the last time you saw an openly lesbian woman give a sermon, or a gay man lead the praise team?

Even if being LGBTQIA is a sin, God doesn’t call us to be the Phari-

sees, pointing out other people’s sin in order to make them pure; he calls us to love and accept every person we meet while striving to become more like Christ. Until we, as a church, start accepting LGBTQIA Christians as contributing members of the church, we are ignoring what Jesus taught us. Our job isn’t to fix people to fit our own beliefs; it is to accept them and let God figure out the rest.

1

http://tinyurl.com/micahissogreat

2

http://tinyurl.com/micahisevengreater

3

John 8:1-11

PERSPECTIVE

09

RELIGION

e12

ui @s

THE AGE

TO COME @tyrannicaltim

memory would be a game changer. The way you look at the scriptures could never be the same.

BENJAMIN

ramey

alit

enn

@j

Religion Writer For thousands of years, the ancients dreamed and speculated about an eternal realm that one could enter after death. The Egyptians talked about the afterlife in the Book of the Dead, a place beyond the stars to where souls traveled only if they could bypass the hazardous areas and evil demons armed with knives. Early Jewish writings depict a great mountain where the master party entertainer known as the “Lord of hosts” will “make for all people a feast of rich food, a feast of well-aged wine, of rich food full of marrow, of aged wine well refined.” 1

@ittybittyeileen

96

ars

est

eth elik

hin

@s

Jesus was asked by the Pharisees when the kingdom of God would come.

He answered, “The kingdom of God is in the midst of you.”2 Now stop and imagine for a moment that you are a first-century Jew who grew up reading and studying about a literal mountain feast with the Lord. There, you and all the other pious folk would spend eternity counting how many times you asked the waiter at Denny’s to remove the bacon from your Grand Slam. The idea that the kingdom of heaven is already here, present, and flowing through our each and every action, experience, and

@mollyann607 @c_sutton16

If the divine kingdom spoken of by the prophets and hoped for by their followers is indeed available and intimately connected to this life, then everything here on this earth must be spiritual.

Two distinct places are featured in the creation story. There is the physical realm, composed of the earth, sun,

“We are spiritual beings, and every one one of us that lives and breathes testifies to the existence of a divine presence.” moon, and stars, and there is the spiritual realm where the Spirit of God abides. But, when the Creator forms man from the dust, He breathes into him the Spirit of God.3 Get this: God takes the very thing that encompasses His existence and He gives this to us.

We are spiritual beings, and every one one of us that breathes testifies to the existence of a divine presence.

The kingdom of heaven is not something that can be attained or won: it can’t be bought; it’s not something than can be physically handled or a place that you can drive to. Heaven can be found everywhere we go and is a part of everything we touch. The kingdom of heaven is found in our midst, in the everyday things that capture beauty and

have meaning. It can be experienced through a cup of coffee, romantic sex, or a painting. Humanity is a collective of beauty, meaning, and purpose — we must choose to understand it as such.

Therefore, it is up to us to affirm goodness whenever we experience it, love wherever its enchantment is seen, and truth everywhere its vibrant song is sung. There is radical freedom in Jesus.

Nothing is off limits!

Of course, destructive forces are still at work, fighting against the peace that should be among us. But the power to bring justice to the hopeless and strength to the weak is in our hands.

This is why the kingdom of heaven is in our midst, because we have the power to bring it here.

Too often are heaven and salvation made out to be an evacuation plan; we run and retreat behind a figment and miss what is right before us. The focus is not on what the age to come has to offer but what we can offer this age.

When and how the Messiah comes to establish His kingdom is irrelevant.

Whether the world is going to end today or in a thousand years, we will still continue to fight to alleviate the suffering of others and contribute to the vast infrastructure known as the kingdom of heaven.

1

Isaiah 25:6 ESV

2

Luke 17:21 ESV

3

Genesis 1

FEATURE

1011

VIRAL CONFLICTS

KARL

wallenkampf Assistant Editor

VIRAL CONFLICTS THREE PROFILES of VIOLENT EPIDEMICS

On the 19th of September, Thomas Eric Duncan returned from Liberia to the States, carrying Ebola.[1] Two others, humanitarian workers who contracted the virus, have already been treated at Emory University Hospital in Atlanta, Georgia.[2] (Yesterday, Duncan succumbed to the virus.)

Viruses have two ways of attacking their hosts. The first, identified in studies of bacteriophages, is called the lytic cycle. The lytic cycle involves a virus adsorbing onto the bacterial cell, injecting the DNA contained in its capsid/ genetic envelope into the host

cell, using the host cell’s apparatus to assemble copies of itself, and finally releasing itself—tearing apart the cell with up to 200 phage particles spreading out to invade more bacteria. The lytic cycle is fast-acting and immediate. [3] The other form is more insidious.

Called the lysogenic cycle, some bacteriophages “choose” to integrate their DNA or RNA into the host’s DNA and simply sit a while, biding their time before their bioputsch, when they convert quickly to the lytic cycle. Because they are not truly alive, viruses cannot be “killed” by normal means. Likewise, they have deadly efficiency

“The western world, itself an interconnected living system of people, thought, and culture, suffers today from infections of all kinds.”

because they simply rely on a host cell’s pre-existing cellular machinery.[4] Though this cellular-level activity may not obviously spark one’s mind to politics, could this deadly progression be recognized in different sorts of systems? What if ideas were the virus and society the system?

The western world, itself an interconnected living system of people, thought, and culture, suffers today from infections of all kinds. Some are benign, others malicious. Society ingests and issues them, both figuratively and literally. Today, we wish to sub-

ALEX

LEMNAH Perspective Editor

mit to you the potential of viewing not only Ebola, but two other current issues—the current spread of the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria, as well as the Slavic struggle in the Ukraine—as forms of political virus. It is possible that at the same time Duncan was returning to the U.S., there was a radicalized individual leaving the U.S. to join forces with ISIS in Syria or Iraq.

Viruses enter and exit from cells, humans, nations. Our goal in this article is to view current issues as viruses, and allow you to draw other connections as you form a greater understanding of these issues.

FEATURE

11

VIRAL CONFLICTS

TROUBLING FACTS ISIS

EBOLA

UKRAINE

U.S. INVOLVEMENT “Now, it will take time to eradicate a cancer like ISIL.”

U.S. INVOLVEMENT

U.S. INVOLVEMENT

Assigned 3,000 U.S. forces to Monrovia, Liberia, to provide command and control support in the region, facilitate coordination of U.S. and international relief efforts.

Imposed economic sanctions on Russia and provided nonlethal technology to the Ukrainian military.

President Obama

VICTIMS

VICTIMS

VICTIMS

The United Nations estimates that militants with the Islamic State in Iraq and Syria have forced nearly 180,000 families — or more than a million people — from their homes in Iraq.

Liberia has the most victims: 2069.

Guinea has the second most: 739.

5000 wounded on all sides since mid-April, says UN. 155,800 have fled to other parts of Ukraine, 188,000 to Russia.

CASUALTIES

CASUALTIES

CASUALTIES

The violence in Iraq has killed more than 5,500 civilians over the first six months of this year.

3,431 (however, there may be as many as 3x the amount of unreported deaths)

Current death-toll at 3543 (including 298 international from Malaysian flight 17), though likely higher, says UN.

PATIENT HISTORY

ISIS

EBOLA

UKRAINE

[1] http://science.howstuffworks.com/life/cellularmicroscopic/virus-human2.htm [2] http://abcnews.go.com/Health/ebola-patients-texascontacts-zoom-80-authorities/story?id=25912405 [3]Mark F. Sanders and John L. Bowman, Genetic Analysis: An Integrated Approach, Benjamin Cummings: Boston, 2012,

ISIS has grown from a problem that has been confronting the U.S. for over a decade. In short, the Islamic State of Iraq and Syria (ISIS) formed by branching and then splitting off from al Qaeda.

Its formation was officially announced in October 2006, over seven years ago. Its goal is simple: establish a caliphate (Islamic state led by a Caliph) in Iraq and Syria. [5] ISIS’ strain of terrorism is peculiar from al Qaeda’s in that it is more brutal and radical. The Guardian writes that it is “a militant group so hardline that it was disavowed by al-Qaida’s leader, Ayman al-Zawahiri.”[6] Part of what distinguishes the group from other terrorist organizations is its lucrative economy and the success with which it recruits young radicals, including Westerners.[7]

DIAGNOSIS ISIS is backed by an economy that is, alarmingly enough, mostly selfsufficient. The group has control of large oil operations and, as indicated by the Wall Street Journal, demands “tribute from a population of at least eight million.”[12] The issue with confronting this force is more complicated than simply making a military push to end its operations.

One Western counterterrorism official brings the complications to light by explaining that, “if you disrupt trade in commodities like food, for example, then you risk starving thousands of civilians.”[13] The symptoms of violence now being witnessed are symptoms stemming from religious tension between Sunnis and Shias that have been stewing and boiling over for hundreds of years. Concerning ISIS, it appears that the invasion of its hosts has advanced well beyond the stages of entry, replication, and even assembly. ISIS is a virus that is now releasing itself with cruelty upon the system at large.

Though the eery name “Ebola” is relatively new to headlines, it is in fact not a new virus. The Ebola virus gets its name from the Ebola River in the Democratic Republic of Congo. In 1976, in a village on this river, one of the first cases of Ebola was reported.The official name of the disease is the “Ebola hemorrhagic fever,” and it strikes in five different strains, one of which only affects animals. Officials aren’t yet positive, but it is generally thought that the virus’s natural host is the fruit bat. [8] Though it is not a new phenomenon, the outbreak in March of this year is unprecedented in that it is the largest and deadliest since the virus first landed on the map 38 years ago.[9]

One of the largest issues surrounding this outbreak, besides the heavy loss of life, is that there is currently no vaccine to treat the virus. Why is it that after 38 years of being privy to a virus, we have yet to develop a medical solution? Dan Gorenstein of Marketplace makes clear his opinion: “There is little incentive for drug manufacturers to develop vaccines and drugs for diseases that affect the poor.”[14] Economist Frank Lichtenberg says there are two things a pharmaceutical company wants to know: “the number of potential customers and their ability to pay.”[15] The current Ebola market doesn’t pay well. With outbreaks mostly affecting countries like Liberia and Sierra Leone that still struggle with economic stability, it’s no wonder that drug companies aren’t licking their lips at the prospects. Stressing about the illnessness of capatilist priorities can be deferred for another time: the best thing that can happen for these countries and their victims has already happened: America has officially been infected and affected.

Long the victim of malevolent powers, Ukraine has been both a target in the evil Nazi dream of a “Jew free” Europe and as potential real estate for Russian expansionism.[10] Itself a part of the Soviet Union created by Josef Stalin, it was in 1991 that Ukraine declared independence from Russia, with 90% popular approval.[11] The whole history is complex and difficult to manage, especially recently.

In November of 2013, a pro-Russian President, Viktor Yanukovych, was democratically elected, but strains on his economic policies eventuated in massive protests throughout Ukraine which were violently resisted by the pro-Russian government. Pro-Western protesters wanted closer economic ties with the EU, and worried about rampant corruption in the government. These protestors got what they wanted: Yanukovych left Ukraine, however the new leaders these protestors desired, namely the current pro-Western president Petro Poroshenko, were not to the liking of many eastern Ukrainians. Thus, in April, pro-Russian protesters stormed government buildings in eastern Ukraine, causing government crackdown and the violence we have seen carried out, even this week.

Many of the issues inherent in this debate boil down to internal debates that go back for years. We see East-West tensions like those in the Cold War as the EU awkwardly supports the current pro-Western government in Ukraine while an increasingly militarily-involved Russia admits more and more to its involvement in supporting Ukrainain rebels, much as it gradually admitted to its invasion of Afghanistan in 1980.[16] We area also seeing the results of a trend begun in 2008, when Russia illegally invaded Georgia.

After that invasion the Russian parliament amended their laws to allow for more efficient troop deployment “with less judicial oversight:” Putin received parliamentary thumbs-up for military involvement in Ukraine in March.[17] While a group of 5,000 Russian paratroopers is ostensibly in eastern Ukraine as “peacekeepers,” the BBC notes that the Russian translation of the word “mirotvorcheskiy” is more aptly translated as “peacemaking”—a troubling shift in meaning. In fact, the BBC reports that in a phone conversation with a Russian general, the general stated that Russian soldiers being called “peacekeeping forces” “[is] the only way you can move troops across another country’s borders with a band playing and with everybody pleased to see them.” Also noxious is the Russian annexation of Crimea in March, which was a political area whose governance was moved from Russia to Ukraine in 1954.[18]

pp. 202-205 [4] http://science.howstuffworks.com/life/cellularmicroscopic/virus-human2.htm [5] http://www.cnn.com/2014/08/08/world/isis-fast-facts/ [6] http://www.theguardian.com/world/2014/jun/16/isisislamic-state-iraq-levant-q-and-a

[7] http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/ wp/2014/06/17/how-isis-persuaded-thousands-ofwesterners-to-fight-its-war-of-extremism/ [8] http://www.who.int/mediacentre/factsheets/fs103/en/ [9] Ibid.

[10] Anne Applebaum, Iron Curtain: The Crushing of Eastern

Europe 1944-1956, Doubleday: New York, 2012, 8 [11] http://www.bbc.com/news/world-middle-east-26248275 [12] http://.wsj.com/articles/islamic-state-fills-coffers-fromillicit-economy-in-syria-iraq-1409175458 [13] Ibid.

[14] http://www.marketplace.org/topics/health-care/why-

there-no-ebola-vaccine [15] Ibid.

[16] http://www.bbc.com/news/world-africa-28971901 [17] Ibid.

[18] http://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-28969784 [19] http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-

TREATMENT PLAN

PROGNOSIS

Worse still is the virulent magnetism that is drawing more and more individuals to the battlefield to join arms in its religious campaign of terror. Richard Barrett of the Soufan Group strikes a chilling note when he explains that Westerners are joining ISIS because “people are seeking a greater purpose and meaning in their lives” and because there exists the “desire to witness and take part in a battle prophesized 1,400 years ago.”[19] The Washington Post states that over the last year, as many as 3,000 Westerners have “become militarized and radicalized.” According to Barrett, the average recruits are young converts to Islam who usually “express their motivation as a religious obligation to protect Muslims from attack.”[20] So what do we – as a “nation under God” – do? With more than 31,000 radical Sunni fighters, ISIS is a force the U.S. has to take notice of.[21] However, the suggestion to take arms appears at the surface laughably hypocritical – how does that make us any different from those we oppose? All other suggestions, however, appear alarmingly insufficient. Is it even possible to exterminate this disease? Obama believes so, and has initiated a campaign of air strikes against ISIS.[22] The air support the U.S. military is providing is supposed to bolster the resistance of Iraqi and Syrian troops on the ground.

Now that Ebola isn’t a boogeyman over the ocean and could actually be the neighbor knocking at the door, things are picking up in the search for a medical solution. The UN Security council held “its first emergency meeting” regarding a “health crisis”[23] and decided on five priorities: “stopping the outbreak, treating the infected, ensuring essential services, preserving stability and preventing further outbreaks.”[24] This statement—made by a council composed of members representing nations hardly affected by this outbreak—falls flat when the actual figures are considered. Though there is hope that there will be a releasable vaccine by January or February 2015,[25] the CDC has projected that by then there could be anywhere between 20,000 and 1.4 million cases.

[26] Cases in Liberia are doubling every 15-20 days and cases in Sierra Leon are doubling every 30-40 days.

Every day represents more lives. Unfortunately, these lives don’t represent profit to the private industries that can make the biggest difference, so medical attention has largely been left to philanthropies and half-living federal governments.[27] The U.S. has, however, declared some specific initiatives outlined in the graphic at the beginning of this article.

Currently, treatment is non-invasive. The EU, US, and Japan are all involved in sanctions on Russian material, which may be causing some Russian economic distress.[28] However, Ukrainian general Oleksandr Kikhtenko claims that France and Germany, specifically, are more than willing to let Russia swallow up Ukraine.[29] However alarmist the statement, it is true that European and American sanctions are not at their fullest possible extent: Russian international assets have not yet been frozen like Iranian assets have been during Western analysis of Iranian nuclear programs. Why? US interests are indirectly linked to Russian funds, financial expert Roman Yermakov notes.[30] However much Western states may be decrying Russian incursions, Ukrainian reporters seem to think it is not enough support.[31]

mix/wp/2014/06/17/how-isis-persuaded-thousands-ofwesterners-to-fight-its-war-of-extremism/ [20] Ibid.

[21] http://www.newsweek.com/2014/10/10/air-strikeswill-never-work-say-troops-fighting-isis-274491.html [22] Ibid.

[23] http://www.un.org/apps/news/story. asp?NewsID=48746 [24] Ibid.

[25] http://time.com/3453022/ebola-vaccines-are-beingexpedited/ [26] http://news.sciencemag.org/africa/2014/09/who-cdc-

One field commander on the front against ISIS questions the U.S. tactic, pointing out that “the US air strikes in Syria have been ineffective so far because the United States is not making joint efforts with the Syrian opposition troops on the ground.’’[32] He calls for full military support from us and our other allied forces.

Many do. Many others, however, questionour past achievements in the Middle East. Has our involvement in Iraq treated the deepseated conflict that spills over with acts of terrorism and coalitions of brutality? The answer is an indecisive “no.” Will involving ourselves in the campaign against ISIS yield different results than before, or will the virus endlessly resurface in mutated forms? If looking backward doesn’t provide a clear enough answer, we will have to settle for the prospect of looking towards an equally obscure future.

Thomas Frieden of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention confidently states that there is “no doubt we will control this case of Ebola.”[33] His optimism is paled by the estimation the World Health Organization has released, but perhaps more hopeful than anything else is the fact that key forces of global health and wellness are now finally rising to the task that has long been in front of them.

A clear outcome is not in sight. Some in the U.S. may start sweating at the prospect of catching an illness that’s been largely overlooked until now. Some think we’ve already been suffering the symptons of a less obvious illness for quite a while. Discussing Ebola inevitably involves considering issues other than the organic virus. There is obviously desperate need to reform what drives our drug companies. Until this happens, we will always be scrambling to deal with illnesses that are the headlines of other countries before ours. Now that Ebola is in the headlines of first world countries, we will have to just wait and see if we can play catch up with a very fast-paced virus.

Whether or not EU or US solutions for the Ukraine conflict will have effect is dependent on their ability to follow through on their supposed support. Interestingly enough, energy independence is an important topic in the EU’s response to the crisis in Ukraine. The EU cannot be brash: it receives one third of its oil from Russia, half of which flows through the Ukraine.[34] But oil is simply one concern among many. Another important concern is in Western military resolve. Though NATO is restructuring its units to provide for more rapid striking ability to hopefully scare off potential aggressors, no concrete progress has been made, and, even if NATO posed an immemdiate military threat to Russian incursions, Ukraine is not a NATO member state and thus Russian intrusion does not legitimize military retaliation.

Military “solutions” are further complicated because nations are increasingly relying on covert operations to estabilsh dominance: in this conflict soldiers without badges or identification stormed Crimean buildings in March—Russia later admitted to that incursion—and the United States gives “non-lethal military equipment” to the Ukrainian military.[35] This leaves us with an important question: how does the West deal with military situations in nations where there is no direct military threat, but rather moral imperative? The answer is still nebulous.

Currently, sanctions are the strategy. However, with a Russian government that may have more resolve in its expansion than the West has in its resistance, Ukraine is caught in a difficult and dangerous position. As for the vile manifestation of greed and territorial expansion gone viral in Ukraine, cures still elude us and the symptoms continue to worsen. Western leaders have yet to recognize and act on this truth: palliative care can only go so far.

publish-grim-new-ebola-projections [27] http://www.marketplace.org/topics/health-care/whythere-no-ebola-vaccine [28] http://www.nytimes.com/2014/09/25/world/europe/ ukraine-russia-nato-withdrawal.html?_r=0 [29] http://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-28983398

[30] Ibid.

[31] Ibid.

[32] http://www.newsweek.com/2014/10/10/air-strikeswill-never-work-say-troops-fighting-isis-274491.html.

[33] http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/to-your-health/ wp/2014/09/30/cdc-confirms-first-case-of-ebola-in-the-u-s/

[34] http://www.bbc.com/news/scienceenvironment-27239734 [35] http://www.bbc.com/news/world-europe-28969784

LIFE

1415

FOOD

QUINOA: THE LUNCHTIME HERO

RACHEL

peterson Food Writer

To help balance out all the baked goods we will be eating this fall, mainly copious amounts of pumpkin bread, it seemed appropriate to gift you a couple of salad recipes. Don’t worry, plenty of baked goods will be featured; stay tuned. But honestly, when these salad recipes are so delicious, who really needs dessert? These recipes are vibrant in both color and flavor, not to mention they’re incredibly good for you! Enjoy as a side or a main dish. Pass the quinoa, please!

I’d love to get feedback from you! Send me an email if you have any comments or suggestions for recipes you’d like to see featured at rachel.peterson@ wallawalla.edu

authoritynutrition.com

Feature

RECIPES: CALIFORNIA QUINOA SALAD I N G R E D I E N TS For salad: 1/2 cup dry quinoa 1 cup water, to cook quinoa 1 large mango, chopped in small pieces 1/4 small red onion, chopped 1/2 red bell pepper, chopped 3/4 cup unsweetened shredded coconut 3/4 cup almond slices or slivers, toasted if preferred 1 cup raisins 1 cup frozen shelled edamame, thawed 1/4 cup chopped cilantro, or parsley if you don’t like cilantro

For dressing: juice from 2 limes 2 tbsp balsamic vinegar 1 tbsp honey 1 tbsp olive oil salt and pepper to taste

ZESTY CILANTRO LIME QUINOA SALAD I N G R E D I E N TS 1 cup quinoa 2 cups water 1 1/2 cups halved cherry tomatoes 1 (15 ounce) can black beans, drained and rinsed 5 green onions, finely chopped 1/4 cup chopped fresh cilantro 1 avocado, chopped salt and pepper to taste

Dressing: 1/4 cup olive oil juice from 1 1/2 limes 2 teaspoons ground cumin 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes (or more to taste)

I N ST R U C T I O N S

(Will keep around 5 days in the fridge.)

1. Bring quinoa and water to a boil in a saucepan.

Reduce heat to medium-low, cover, and simmer until quinoa is tender and water has been absorbed, 10 to 15 minutes. Set aside to cool.

2. Whisk all the dressing ingredients together in a small bowl.

3. In a large bowl toss all the salad ingredients together including the cooled quinoa and add the dressing. Toss well and serve cold.

(Will keep about 5 days in the fridge)

I N ST R U C T I O N S 1. Bring quinoa and water to a boil in a saucepan. Reduce heat to medium-low, cover, and simmer until quinoa is tender and water has been absorbed, about 10 to 15 minutes. Set aside to cool.

2. Whisk olive oil, lime juice, cumin, salt, and red pepper flakes together in a bowl.

3. Combine quinoa, tomatoes, black beans, and green onions together in a bowl. Pour dressing over quinoa mixture; toss to coat. Stir in cilantro and avocado; season with salt and black pepper. Serve immediately or chill in refrigerator.

Recipe adapted from: Allrecipes.com

jcooks.com

Recipe adapted from: triplantstrong.blogspot.ca

es.com

LIFE

15

CULTURE

when WORDS make you WEEP RIVER

davis

SPOKEN WORD:

Favorite Poetry:

I used to think that poems were simply boring, middle-school assignments, but then I realized that they often hold enough power to change your life.

Listener – “Wooden Heart”

Culture Writer Many of us have written a poem at some point. I remember when I was about twelve, I went through a “poem phase” where I logged on to our Windows 95 computer and spent hours picking the perfect Word Art for my title. The poems were usually about the beach or an eagle or something majestic like that, and I would print them out and tape them to my wall, staring at my work with proud dignity.

I was a poet.

Pretty soon, poems became nothing more than a required assignment in school. I made sure all the lines rhymed just right, and yet another lame poem about the beach was laminated and put in my binder.

Last year, spoken word caught my interest after I heard an artist named Anis Mojgani. When he speaks his words sound like crisp autumn leaves or the break of ocean waves on rocks; his poems are so deep and inspirational that I want to jump out of my seat and hug a homeless person and tell them life is beautiful.

So when I was recently referred to a

mysterious spoken-word artist named “Listener,” I decided to give him a chance. The poem entitled “Wooden Heart” began to play from the speakers with mild electric guitar and a soft bass. All of a sudden a voice that sounded like a drunken homeless man from the South began to passionately spit out words over the music.

We’re all born to broken people on their most honest day of living /And since that first breath, we’ll need grace that we’re never given.

I tried not to laugh at the sound of his brash southern drawl. Usually poets speak with the utmost tenderness, but this dude was off the chain.

This war-ship is sinking and I still believe in anchors / Pulling fistfuls of rotten wood from my heart, I still believe in saviors / But I know that we are all made out of shipwrecks, every single board / Washed and bound like crooked teeth on these rocky shores…

My amusement faded as I digested his words. The music was building and the images in my head were dancing with the raw beauty of the words. It

the kaleidoscope New discoveries, far and near. Songs, books, art, it’s shared right here.

was a strange feeling, unexpected. It blindsided me.

I am the barely living son of a woman and man who barely made it / But we’re making it, taped together on borrowed crutches and new starts / We all have the same holes in our hearts… / …And I know there are churches made out of shipwrecks / From every hull these rocks have claimed / But we pick ourselves up, and try and grow better through the change.

It was then that a mysterious phenomenon took place. Despite the fact that men never ever cry, I found myself holding back a small tear. Why I would become emotional to some southern dude slamming his way through a poem is beyond me, but somehow the words and the music combined and it all hit me just right. There, I said it. It was beautiful.

But why is this? Why did this poem hit me like it did? I later showed it to a few friends with the hope of changing their lives with it, but the most common response I received was, “his voice is weird.”

Spoken word is a strange art form.

It’s not a poetry reading, and it’s not quite rap. But whether you like poetry or not, I believe spoken word can do things music cannot. Somehow the words are often written in such a way that they reach a part of the soul that has yet to be tapped by anything else. In the words of slam poet Bobby Esnard, “You do not get poetry, poetry gets you.” We can study the stanzas and alliterations all day long, but when a spoken word poem hits you in the right way, it sends shivers down your core. I remember when I first heard “Shake the Dust” by Anis Mojgani; I was floored. This is no grade-school poetry; these are raw hymns of the human condition.

I want to share this with you. Some people don’t care for spoken word, and it just sounds like weird half-rap from skinny white guys. But this week I challenge you to check it out and see if the beauty takes you. I’ve provided a few of my favorite poems, but like we’ve all learned from Reading Rainbow, “Don’t take my word for it!”

Propaganda – “G.O.S.P.E.L.”

Anis Mojgani – “Shake the Dust”

Shane Koyczan – “The Crickets Have Arthritis”

Jefferson Bethke – “The Greatest Artist of All Time”

TELESCOPE American Sniper: Clint Eastwood directs Bradley Cooper as the soldier who recorded the highest number of sniper kills in the U.S. military. Based Allie Brosh: The creator of on a true story and Chris the blog “Hyperbole and a Kyle’s autobiography, the film Half” and the beloved “all is projected to give us an inthe things!” character has tense view inside of the dark published a book of her world of a Navy Seal sniper. stories and blogs. Available at

SCOPE

MICROSCOPE

KWE: Our very own Kevin Ellis is on the run with rap. His newest release in September is entitled “No More” and encompasses his feelings major bookstores, the book on turning 20. Previous works include the EP Riding Hyperbole and a Half contains Vibes and the single “Numbers.” Keep watch on this hilarious illustrations of simulblooming artist who made his debut with the renowned taneously funny and serious ASWWU “Can’t Hold Us” parody, because we may very well be topics, seeing the beginnings of a successful musical career.

LIFE

1617

CONTRIBUTION

Who We Are: WWU is proud to have a student-run coffee house on the corner of Whitman and College Ave. The Atlas showcases and sells student art, hosts open mics, and makes great drinks.

Location: 6 N College Ave. Hours: Mon – Thu: 7 a.m. – 7 p.m.

Fri: 7 a.m. – 4 p.m.

Sun: 10 a.m. - 7 p.m.

NORMAL LIFE Let’s talk about living in a foreign country for a year.

I came to Bangkok expecting to have a difficult transition, to be completely overwhelmed by the language, people, culture, food. But I’m not. I don’t believe I ever was.

They said to take photos during the tourist phase, but I think that wore off about the same time as my jet lag. So far, I’ve only taken a few photos with my camera in the past few days. And some with my iPhone. While the language is different and so are the streets and food and so many other things, being abroad is intriguingly normal.

Seasonal Specials: “The OCTO-BEAR!” “Charlie Brown’s Great Pumpkin Latte”

I know perhaps this is because I’m 23, already have my bachelor of arts degree, have worked (if only briefly), and have traveled before. However, I think there’s an important point here: As an American (and perhaps other cultures do this too), I grossly misjudged what I would find here in Bangkok. There are far more similarities than differences. Everyone here is human (surprise!) and not really that different than you or me.

It goes beyond basic needs. When I walk down the street and buy crepes and fruit and smoothies and tea from street vendors and eat chicken pineapple fried rice in a slightly-moredirty-than-in-America restaurant, I’m

just like any other Thai (except, of course, for my pathetically white skin and inability to communicate without someone laughing).

We all work, try to save some money, think of our families, plan for the future, remember the past. We shop in the same markets and malls and watch the same subtitled movies. Sure, Thailand is different, but it’s so much the same.

One of the most pathetic human tendencies (and the most prevalent, sadly) is our tendency to label people, cultures, places. The beauty of the world isn’t that everything’s different, but that everything’s the same. At it’s core, people all around the world want the same thing. The reason we perpetuate differences is often so that we can elevate ourselves and our own culture.

As an American, I can testify to this happening. I can’t be so sure about other cultures elevating themselves by suppressing others as different, but I’m sure it happens.

I think I’ve realized that people are all basically the same, I’ve started to understand that beauty is similarities expressed differently. Instead of eating at chain restaurants, I eat at no-name food carts (by the way, where has the ice cream man on a tricycle been?).

PHILIP

duclos Contributing Writer So if people wonder why I don’t blog for two weeks, it’s because to me, it feels like blogging about college or my summer job. I’ll try to keep my blog updated on a semi-regular basis, but only because I know I will have stories, and my blog is for sharing stories.

In all honesty, if I wanted to be a teacher, I would seriously consider staying in Bangkok. While I would miss the cold, clean air of the pacific northwest, I would have the same nostalgia even in the US. And I know my experience is probably different than others, but here’s my advice for living abroad: make local friends; some of them will undoubtedly become close. They also know how to get around better than you do. Try to learn local words, but even when you don’t know, communicate as patiently as possible. The locals will appreciate your efforts, and so will you. Avoid judging others: you don’t know their circumstances. And finally, expect that your experience will be normal.

Seek the similarities; not because what you’re used to is the best, but because it will make your transition easier to recognise that, for example, your street vendor Thai tea is just like Starbucks, only better.

OPINION

17

CW

Creative

WRITING

Coming again The constant refrain

Creative Writing

ed to be a y consider e I would the pacific same nos-

Todays and tomorrows

Its joys and its sorrows A grand life we have

(Untitled) Brandon Pierce

Enjoy what’s at hand Not things yet to come If we live above it all Aren’t we all numb?

100 US Marines Sent to Fight Ebola -Quick, shoot it!

Google uses camel for desert street-view.

-Check for photobombing cactus.

Fly away, say I Silver ship high in the sky Again alive, I

Edward Snowden possible Nobel Peace Prize Nominee -Would be arrested during acceptance speech

Fly away again Farewell to Columbia I seek pastures green

Muslim Woman Barred from Co. Pool

From New to Old World Goodbye my Columbia Hello Europa

4-year-old Took Mom’s Heroin to Daycare

For promise abound But light on the ground

WISDOM

- #obscene

We ignore what we have Keep your feet planted

Collegian

Richland Wa. School Bans Swings

Sit still and remain Blind to this world

ot because e best, but transition r example, is just like

wissink

If only we wouldn’t

hy I don’t ause to me, college or ep my blog basis, but ave stories, tories.

ce is probbut here’s oad: make m will unThey also better than words, but w, commusible. The fforts, and others: you ances. And experience

ABIGAIL

If you’d like to submit your poetry, prose, songs, or any kind of creative writing, I’d love to see your work! Email me at abigail.wissink@ wallawalla.edu

You’re freaking me out Please kid stop staring at me Too tired for this

Travel Haikus Brandon Pierce

-Modesty, anyone?

-Thought it was candy.

Clean-shaven portrait of Jesus unearthed in Spain -Beardless men gain confidence Beer Shoplifters Slip During Getaway -Shoulda been wiser, bud.

LIFE

1819

#thecollegian

@micromatty @melsnee09

@johannachevrier

@sarah_fierce33

@_misshall

@terridickinsonneil

@scirocco

thecollegian

INSTAGRAM

@hungryangelsfan

LIFE

19

HUMOR

THIS IS EYE-CATCHING. and awkward sympathetic cuddling from your body pillow. At least you get to skip class if you have Ebola.

hall

fan

LAUREN

LEWIS Humor Writer My native Walla Walla University humans, below are my few observations of the week. Enjoy.

First, I love WWU Vespers, and last friday night’s service was especially spectacular. The music was thrilling (I suggest more cowbell, Kurtis Lamberton) and the Campus Ministries video was hilarious.

However, as the 13-minute film played, I came to a grave realization: my legs will never be as toned and well-formed as Tommy Poole’s. Does he lunge from office to office?

“...my legs will never be as toned and well-formed as Tommmy Poole’s.”

Second, we are in week number two, which means the women dwellers of the dorm are beginning to sync their special time of the month. Beware, men: the Foreman, Conard, and Meske women will be collectively attacking campus with exaggerated emotions very soon.

Arm yourselves with Dove dark chocolate and compliments!

Third, I’ve decided I would rather catch Ebola or the swine flu than catch emotions. Emotions may cause mass consumptions of baked goods, selfloathing, Grey’s Anatomy marathons,

Fourth, somebody awesome said, “You can’t control your emotions, but you can control your actions.”

This is great because a new scientific study is suggesting that sleeping without underwear, a.k.a. commando style, is healthier for your body.1 Consequently, I say control your emotions, let your beans fly and enjoy the freedom of pantie-less pajamas!

“At least you get to skip class if you have Ebola.”

And last, beginning today, oodles of high schoolers will descend upon the Walla Walla valley for the yearly soccer tournament, Fall Classic.

The WWU faculty has asked all University students to welcome the helpless high schoolers and to avoid hitting them on College Ave. They do not yet know the ways of college life or how to cross busy streets. I suggest we educate the visiting uninformed masses of the realities of college life, which include being exhausted and sporadically having fun. Therefore, encourage the hoards to drink gallons of caffeinated fluids and to prance wildly late into the night.

Due to the influx of people on campus this weekend, I will be initiating my personal favorite game called “Hide and Watch Netflix in My Apartment with a Large Mug of Wassail.” Have a splendid week, and may the weekend come quickly — Gilmore Girls is on Netflix! www.sheknows.com

tty

1. Medicmagic.net. “Sleeping Without Underwear Is Better for Health.”MedicMagicNet. Medi Magic, n.d. Web. 06 Oct. 2014.

thecollegian

SNAPCHAT

LIFE

2021

TRAVEL

Corn Maze in Walla Walla — http://unionbulletin.media.clients.ellingtoncms.com

THE FALL EXPERIENCE SHANNON

pierce

Travel Writer

Fall is starting to hit. Maybe not in College Place, but it’s officially October, which means pumpkin everything, sweater weather, and couples finding themselves snuggling more than usual. However, the one thing that really defines fall season is the changing leaves. One of the best places to really see these colors is the East Coast. Everywhere you look there are trees. I would know; I’m from Maine.

In New England during October, there’s a definite chill outside; frost coats the morning ground, and every day there are more and more leaves on the ground just asking to be jumped in; the smells of apple pies are in the air with juices running down the sides of the pans – or your face, if the temptation is too great; in the evenings, through the breaks of trees, fire pits glow and the smell of smoke fills the air. The only thing that’s missing is the corn maze.

pintrest.com

Walla Walla, however, has its own fall charm. A few times a month, I’ll be talking about what our town has to offer. So, freshmen and transfer students, pay special attention to this.

The Walla Walla valley acts as home for nine months to students of three colleges: Walla Walla Community College, Whitman College, and Walla Walla University. Suffice it to say, it’s a college town and this means there’s a plethora of coffee shops and restaurants that are great for studying and just staying cozy.

The most popular places to run into into another WWU student include Starbucks (at Plaza Way and Main Street), Coffee Perk, the Colville St. Patisserie, Blue Palm, Graze, the Olive, Maple Counter, Worm Ranch, Sweet Basil, and many others.

While it’s still warm, take an opportunity to go to Rooks Park or to Bennington Lake, especially to enjoy Sabbath afternoons. The best place to watch a sunset is on top of Whitman Mission. The roads around the campus are great for those who run or bike. In October, the corn maze is open Thursdays through Sundays and the fee is only $7; it’s a big attraction for club events. So go, my dear readers, find the fall experience before it gets too cold. Instagram your adventure with #thecollegian. pinterest.com

LIFE

21

FASHION

WANT TO SHOW OFF YOUR PERSONAL STYLE?

STYLE PROFILE

Submit an image of your personal style for a chance to be featured as the next style profile candidate to aswwu. collegian@wallawalla.edu.

cms.com

nterest.com

Photos by Alyssa Hartwick

Saige Chiakowsky

18, Freshman, Forensic Psychology I am honored to feature my beautiful cousin and best friend, Saige, in this year’s first style profile. Her trendy look is inspired by where she grew up: Orange County, California. Here, she is wearing a relaxed yet edgy outfit, perfect for fall. It features a khaki jacket, striped crop top, highwaisted skirt, and my favorite part, jellies. Sandals made from a rubbery material that are usually closed-toe with an ankle strap popular in the early 90s. I think they are simply amazing, so I’ve provided information for where you can buy your own pair.

get the look

Top | Forever 21 Jacket | Urban Outfitters Skirt | American Apparel Shoes | American Apparel Bag | Irene’s Story

ASOS, HEELED JELLY SHOES $34.28

Sunglasses | Her Own

Photos by Alyssa Hartwick

interview AH: How would you describe your personal style?

SC: I would say lots of dark clothes and girly pieces with borderline edge.

AH: Where do you get most of your style inspiration?

SC: Tumblr!

AH: If you could raid anyone’s closet, whose would it be?

SC: I would have to say pre-VMAs Miley Cyrus or Cara Delevingne.

AH: What is the craziest fashion item you’ve ever purchased?

SC: A crop top covered in bright pink lips.

ALYSSA

hartwick Fashion Writer

PERSPECTIVE

2223

SCIENCE

meaningless words Chemical-Free DANIEL

hulse Science Writer It’s common knowledge that “chocolatey” Cocoa Puffs don’t contain chocolate, “buttery” microwave popcorn doesn’t actually contain real butter, and Cheetos, which pride themselves on being as “cheesy” as possible, aren’t actually made of cheese. Why? Because “chocolatey,” “buttery,” and “cheesy” are words that aren’t connected to actual facts about the food itself rather to how they taste, which isn’t regulated like actual food content is. While the use of the words above is relatively inconsequential, similar verbal trickery can have much more wide-reaching effects.

As an introduction, I’ve compiled a list of marketing words that don’t mean anything.

Free Range While free range should mean that your chickens have a considerable amount of free space to walk around in, the USDA definition is weak enough to allow for abuse. Producers are only required to “demonstrate to the Agency that the poultry has been allowed access to the outside,”1 which means that a single facility with thousands of chickens can provide a mere four square foot patch of open air and still legally be able to call their chickens “free range,” even though those birds will spend the vast majority of their lives without moving much.2 3

Chemical-free is one of the most ridiculous phrases used to describe food. Literally every consumer good labeled “chemical-free” is made of chemicals because that’s what chemicals are. You can’t really make something if it isn’t made of matter, and you can’t really have matter without a definite chemical composition. There really isn’t anything else you can make things out of. If the products were really chemical-free, they would be made of nothing — they would be vacuums.

Peak Horsepower Peak horsepower is the highest amount of power a motor will produce at maximum performance.

While peak horsepower does have a technical definition, its use in power tools and other equipment isn’t a good measure of the equipment’s performance because it isn’t the horsepower you should be getting from that tool on a day-to-day basis.

If the consumer wants to check the power of a piece of equipment, they need to check the steady-state horsepower rating, the horsepower developed under normal conditions, because that is the power the consumer is actually going to use.

When the motor is pushed to its peak horsepower, it will quickly wear and fail.

Watt Ratings (Sound Systems)

There’s a lot of deception in the stereo industry because like many other common products, most people have no idea how sound systems actually work. One of

the more common sources of this deception is the emphasis on watt ratings. While the amount of watts an amplifier produces is definitely related to how sound systems work, it can be essentially meaningless if the speaker efficiency isn’t known.4

Natural One of the the most deceptive words is natural. Natural gives the impression that some timehonored method was used to make something. Anything labeled with “natural” wants you to think it was made with simple ingredients in a “close to nature” way, the way you might at home or using some process or substance found in a plant. Unfortunately, there is no legal definition for “natural” foods in the United States5, so while “natural” might conjure up those ideas, legally it does not denote anything at all.

Part of the reason for this is that the word itself is so ill-defined; the

“Companies will try to stretch reality a bit to try to get you to buy their product.” many meanings of natural make it difficult to really pin down. A natural process or substance could be one that only happens away from human intervention: natural mosses collected only in remote fjords in Norway. It refers to a process that is standard or normal; a well-known or simple process: This applesauce was made in the most “natural” way

possible — we sliced, cooked, mashed, mixed, and seasoned the apples using household items. It could just be something that was was convenient or obvious: We chose the processes most natural to us from our physics class to design this atomic bomb or We naturally used the battery acid instead of the olive oil. Natural can even refer to being made or existing in accordance to the laws of nature: That isn’t a ghost but a naturallyoccurring optical illusion.

Most importantly, the appeal for “natural” items is ill-informed.

Many things marketed as “natural” products are just as or even more dangerous than the unnatural alternative. Many totally naturallyoccurring plants will kill you if you eat them, such foxglove, bane berries, or oleander. Many commonly eaten natural foods can even have negative longterm effects, like bananas, which contain small traces of radioactive potassium-40. In many cases the “scary chemical” household products we use are not only more effective than the natural “homemade” solutions, but better for the environment simply because they have been engineered to be that way. Roundup, for example, is less toxic than an alternative vinegarand-salt weed killer you can make at home.6 So even if there was a welldefined legal definition of “natural,” the reasoning behind needing one doesn’t make much sense.

So we’ve established that companies will try to stretch reality a bit to try to get you to buy their product. While you may be more informed about buying things and looking for meaningful words to describe those products, it’s important to remember that other people may not be so good at recognizing that a certain word

doesn’t really mean anything. There are proper regulatory agencies that are supposed to control how companies are allowed to describe products, and they ought to be doing something about this sort of thing. Aside from being wrong from a purely ethical standpoint, this type of dishonesty is wrong from the most conservative of Christian standpoints. The Bible flat-out says “The LORD abhors dishonest scales, but an accurate weight is his delight.”7 So the next time you see something a bit askew about the way something is measured or described, make a fuss about it. It’s not just funny, it’s wrong.

1

http://www.fsis.usda.gov/wps/

portal/fsis/topics/food-safety-education/ get-answers/food-safety-fact-sheets/ food-labeling/meat-and-poultry-labelingterms/meat-and-poultry-labeling-terms 2

http://www.humanesociety.org/

issues/confinement_farm/facts/guide_ egg_labels.html 3

http://www.peta.org/issues/animals-

used-for-food/free-range-organic-meateggs-dairy/ 4

http://stereos.about.com/od/

stereoscience/a/amppower.htm 5

http://www.fda.gov/aboutfda/

transparency/basics/ucm214868.htm 6

http://weedcontrolfreaks.

com/2014/06/salt-vinegar-and-glyphosate/ 7

Psalm 1:11 NET. That’s right folks, I

just used a spiritual appeal in a science article.

PERSPECTIVE

23

SPORTS

baseball

playoff theories What does it take to win in the playoffs? I thought I knew in July when it was announced ALEX that the Oakland Athletics made a move to get both Sports Writer all-star pitcher Jeff Samardzija and the equally competent Jason Hammel from the Chicago Cubs. A great offense would be complimented by a great pitching staff. See you in the playoffs, Oakland Athletics!

wagner

I had written off the current Athletic pitcher, Yoenis Cespedes. So when the A’s traded him to Boston for Jon Lester a few weeks later, I was ready to go all in on Oakland. Lester, a true left handed ace with a nice 1.97 ERA in 11 career postseason starts, was exactly what could take this team to the playoffs. At that point, I was consuming an unhealthy amount of A’s Kool-Aid. The same day as the Lester trade, the Detroit Tigers looked at what was going on in Oakland, and decided to make a power move. They acquired the only available pitcher on the market who may have been better than Lester — David Price of the Tampa Bay Rays. The Tigers’ roster, already stacked with batting and a healthy rotation of Cy Young Award winners, now had a killer pitcher.

“See you in the ALCS, Tigers and A’s!” or so I thought.

It is now October, and the Tigers and Athletics are among the first teams to get bounced from the postseason. Oakland had a major collapse following the Cespedes trade and barely even made it to the wildcard game. They then faced off against Kansas City where Mr. 1.97 layoff ERA Jon Lester gave up six earned runs leading to an early playoff exit for Oakland. The Tigers were swept by the Baltimore Orioles following losses from Price,

Scherzer, and a poor performance from Verlander. In the premier pitching series between the Dodgers and Cardinals, National League MVP Clayton Kershaw gave up eight earned runs in a loss against St. Louis and their ace Adam Wainwright, who allowed six.

Photo by: Jeff Robertson

This unexpected situation is kind of like that homework question that you just can’t figure out. Instead of coming up with a nice, easy solution, you keep crossing potential answers off of the list. The crazy thing about baseball, particularly this season, is that we don’t know the right answer.

“having the best individual hitter in the game is not enough to win the world series.”

This brings me back to my original question: what does it take to win the playoffs? My original theory, trading for big time pitchers, has been proven wrong. Conversely, having the best individual hitter in the game is not enough to win the world series. Even the top regular season record has not altered the results — we’re looking at you, Angels and Nationals.

So, as the playoffs progress, I will keep developing a winning formula.

At this point, I am open to any ideas about what it really takes to succeed.

So far, my theories, which have yet to be proven wrong, include placing a bubble machine in the dugout, which apparently instills Matt Kemp with enough strength to carry the entire Dodger’s team on his back to victory. Maybe, if you think like

an Oriole, having a whole stadium continuously chant the baseline of the White Stripes “Seven Nation Army” will provide the team with enough huzzah to pull off a win. Or maybe everyone should follow the example of Kansas City, because it seems that after losing for 28 straight years, it should be impossible to lose anything over the next 28.

Photo by: Wally Caddow

Photo by: www.wallown.com

Afterwords

TECHNOLOGICALLY CHALLENGED

CARLY

YAEGER Afterwords Writer

On a scale of 1 to 10, how user friendly is an iPhone or a Droid?

What about a MacBook, or an iPad? For most of us youngsters it’s probably a 1 or 2, and for those of us who are a little more technologically challenged (**cough cough** me) maybe a 4. But for the most part, running them is fairly intuitive.

Now rate your parents on this same scale. I will be the first to volunteer my parents: Dad in particular. This number is much closer to a solid 11. I remember when he first got an iPhone.

He was one of those people who did not understand how the phone could function with only three buttons, none of which are digits to dial.

After he accepted the touch screen, it took him months of strict training to touch the screen gently without messing up everything.

“Daddy, just hold down the app until it shakes and then move it to the next page!” But when your father still refers to an app as “that blue box,” it can be a lengthy process, ultimately resulting in the translation, “Dad. Put your finger on the blue square and don’t lift it off the thing! Dad! You have to slide your finger across it until it moves to the next screen! Dad don’t let go of the

“Bonjour, I’m British! Oh wait, that’s Italian.”

– Hunter Garecht

“Your buttcrack isn’t centered.”

- Mikeky Jennings

“What does Ellen White know about coffee?

She never went to college.”

For confessions, check out Collegian-Confidential on Tumblr.

Since then, he’s gotten the hang of it. It’s funny, because no matter how many cool tricks, tips, and apps my sister and I show him, he continues to only use the iPad to search Craigslist for cars or watch Top Gear on Netflix.

The last time I went home however, he and my mom both expressed major interest in Snapchat. After an entire afternoon of helping him capture snaps, he finally got it. My mom, on the other hand, was an instant Snapchat pro.

I get hundreds of snaps from her every day – photos, videos, drawings, filters, hashtags.… She is particularly adept in the art of hashtags. #herwholecaptionisusuallyinthehashtag

My dad’s latest frustration lies in the new iOS 8 update, which many of you can relate to. My dad loathes the, and I quote, “dots” above the pages. That’s the other thing about dads and iPhones — those dots, even though they in no way hinder his use of his iPad, irk every fiber of his being and practically ruin his entire Apple experience.

I find that it’s the little things in life that make it so sweet. It’s not about the latest iPhone, or the newest toy.

It’s not even the bigger-than-usual paycheck we occasionally receive. It’s about laughing at yourself, enjoying the company of your homies, and appreciating the beauty we see everyday around us. So, if the stress and boredom of school have set in, I’m telling you right now, set your parents up with a Snapchat: you’ll be entertained for days.

CONFIDENTIAL

HAVE YOU EVER WONDERED...

- Johnel Lagabon

If you have a quote for Verbatim or a “Have You Ever Wondered?” e-mail me at carly.yaeger@wallawalla.edu.

square! Dad! Just do what you would naturally do! If this was a 3D thing, what would you do to move it?!” And don’t even get me started with teaching him Facebook Mobile.

Collegian

VERBATIM

“

“

After years of my sister, mom, and I being iPhone owners, we were unable to convince my flip-phone using dad to make the upgrade. Instead, we treated him to an iPad for Christmas one year. In hopes of making him “hip,” my sister and I spent the remainder of Christmas break coaching him through all the ins and outs of his new toy. We quickly learned that daughter-to-dad translations would have to happen for him to understand successfully.

“Why is there a ‘d’ in fridge but not in refrigerator?”

Dear Carly, I really like this girl, but she is dating someone. Is it bad to let her know how I feel?

?

Dear Anonymous, Appropriately, it depends. Also, that’s unfortunate; but there are definitely other fish in the sea. That aside, think through the consequences before you take action. Sometimes certain fish are worth casting for over and over again (Pretty profound quote there by C. R. Yaeger, eh?). Remember, the most important thing remains: don’t ever regret being honest. It’s the best thing people can be these days. No matter the outcome, you’re only responsible for your honesty, not for their reaction to it. Fisherman + Honesty = super hot.

“If a redhead worked at a bakery, would that make him a gingerbread man?”

“What would happen if Pinocchio said ‘My nose will now grow’?”

Dear Carly, my first roommate in college would cry about being broken up with and listen to 50 Cent at the same time. I tried really hard not to laugh.

Dear Anonymous, I prefer Eminem, but I can respect their taste. Practicing compassion might be helpful in the future; break ups can hurt. Laughter is the cure to most everything, I’ve found. Perhaps memorizing a few bars of Fiddy Cent can help your friend through their next break-up.