Volume 99, Issue 7

SNAPSHOTS | 06

THE WALLA WALLA UNIVERSITY

collegian VOLUME 99 | ISSUE 7 | 13 NOVEMBER 2014 |

TRAVEL | 20

TRAVEL | 10

As the weather goes from charming and brisk to bone-chilling cold, I’m reminded that this quarter, this year, this slice of my life is slipping by quickly.

The barn parties of the past and present begin to fade together with a blur of hay, costumes, lights, onesies, and even a few chickens to whom I got overly attached. Even the nights working late with The Collegian staff are becoming nostalgic too soon, with the curry and music and chai.

RICKY

BARBOSA Editor-in-Chief

Over the past several issues, our staff has tackled some difficult subjects, some of which have had personal as well as national implications. This week, we get a closer look at our own clothing. Our culture can be

02 context EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ricky Barbosa ASSISTANT EDITOR Karl Wallenkampf LAYOUT EDITOR Mindy Robinson HEAD COPY EDITOR Andrea Johnson PERSPECTIVE EDITOR Alex Lemnah CONTENT EDITOR Carolyn Green

@loganmcarter

08 perspective BACKPAGE & CREATIVE CURATOR Abigail Wissink

SCIENCE & TECH WRITER Daniel Hulse

CULTURE WRITER River Davis

SPORTS WRITER & PROMOTION MANAGER Alex Wagner

FASHION WRITER Alyssa Hartwick

TRAVEL & LOCAL WRITER Shannon Pierce

FOOD WRITER Rachel Peterson

COPY EDITORS Tyler Jacobson Kayla Albrecht Rachel Blake

HUMOR WRITER & OFFICE MANAGER Lauren Lewis NEWS WRITERS Savannah Kisling Morgan Sanker RELIGION WRITERS Benjamin Ramey Randy Folkenberg

ADVERTISING MANAGER Shandra Cady

So once again, I ask you to engage critically with our feature! But as “The Queen” has oft reminded my class, what really matters is the relationships we build. Don’t let this year slip away from you.

Opinion | 8 Religion | 9 Feature | 10-13

theguardian.com

Monica Culler

Editor’s Letter & Table of Contents | 2 News | 3 Senate & Infogr | 4 PDX Update & ACA/SM | 5 Photos | 6 Week in Forecast | 7

quite materialistic, and with that comes a varying level of concern for or even obsession with our appearances.

But how often do we question our clothes’ journey from fiber to factory to department store and eventually, our closet? Clothing is an important part of our daily lives, but its production has an oft-forgotten impact on the daily lives of those who make it.

DISTRIBUTION MANAGER Zachary Johnson LAYOUT DESIGNERS Matthew Moran Ian Smith Emily Brinley ASWWU HEAD PHOTO EDITOR Erick Juarez

14 life

Food | 14 Culture | 15 Fashion | 16 CW & CW | 17 #thecollegian | 18 Humor | 19 Travel | 20 Ads | 21 Science | 22 Sports | 23 The Other Cheek | 24

Corrections: 1. Brandon Pierce is an ACA student, not a missionary in Yap. (Issue 6) 2. Cathy McMorris Rodgers’ name was misspelled. (Issue 5) Congratulations to her on her win!

If you are interested in contributing to The Collegian, speak with one of our illustrious staff members. The Collegian is enhanced by regularly incorporating a wide range of campus perspectives.

Cover Credit: Feature Image - koreabridge.com; plzkthx.com; Monica Culler The Collegian is the official publication of ASWWU. Its views and opinions are not necessarily the official stance of Walla Walla University or its administration, faculty, staff, or students. Questions, letters, and comments can be sent to aswwu.collegian@wallawalla.edu or richard.barbosa@ wallawalla.edu. This issue was completed at 1:45 A.M. on Thursday, November 13, 2014.

For information about advertising, please contact Shandra Cady at aswwu.ads@wallawalla.edu.

The Collegian | Volume 99, Issue 7 | 204 S. College Avenue, College Place, WA 99324 | collegian.wallawalla.edu

7 an | 18

heek | 24

CONTEXT

MORGAN

sanker News Writer On November 9, 2014, in the Melvin K. West Fine Arts Center, distinguished faculty lecturer Linda Emmerson presented “I have Called You Friends: Implications for Morality of Human Friendship with the Divine.” Emmerson’s lecture explained the importance of the Divine’s relationship with humanity through Christian theology and through Greek and Roman figures. Her supporting points included the invitation of humanity to a relationship with the Divine and humans’ moral obligations to themselves and to the world.

relationships

03 NEWS

with the Divine Through the use of Christian figures, Emmerson established a connection between the Divine and humanity by showing the relationship between the two parties as “an achievement” rather than something “ascribed.”

Through Christian theology, Emmerson showed the relationship between the Divine and humanity to be an invitation to equality.

Many of Jesus’ teachings put

humanity and Christ on equal terms, instead of mortal below Divine. Jesus “no longer call[s humanity] servants… instead, [He has] called [them] friends” (John 15:15).

Emmerson also explained the importance of the Greek word philia in relationship to the divine and humanity. When in philia with the Divine, humanity enters into a special relationship in

which the Divine is autonomously authoritative. This specific form of a relationship is to be achieved rather than ascribed by the Divine.

However, the achieved relationship comes with moral obligations.

Humanity must understand that a relationship with the Divine is a way of life.

This way of life must be guided by a hunger for truth and a thirst for reason. Humanity is bound to love

and respect everyone while moving from ignorance into wisdom. By fairly evaluating all truths, humanity fulfills its moral obligations to the Divine as well as to others.

Emmerson ended by relating her claims to higher education. If we become active and hungry seekers of truth in education and push ourselves to employ reason in their everyday lives, all will continue to grow.

school of nursing accredidation extension SAVANNAH

kisling News Writer

Walla Walla University School of Nursing’s accreditation has been extended until June, 2015 on good cause from the Accreditation Commission for Education in Nursing (ACEN). The continuing accreditation was denied in July of this year because WWU was unable to hire all master’s-prepared nursing faculty. No fault was found in the curriculum or the quality of instruction. Over the summer, WWU was able to show ACEN that good progress was being made and that by January, 100% of the nursing faculty (both full- and part-time) would have at least a master’s degree in nursing. ACEN granted the ex-

tension. “We have two part-time nursing faculty who will graduate with their master’s degrees in Nursing this term, so we will have met this requirement by the end of December. ACEN will send site visitors in February to verify this and that other parts of the nursing program remain strong,” said Lucy Krull, Dean of the WWU School of Nursing.

Due to the extension, all nursing majors who will graduate in June of 2015 will graduate from an ACEN-accredited school. The accreditation is important to graduating nursing students because it ensures that their education meets

professional and institutional standards. The site visit in February will determine the accreditation beyond this current school year.

“We are confident that the ACEN visitors will find the nursing program to be compliant with all accreditation standards,” said Krull. “The WWU School of Nursing continues to seek the very best qualified Christian nursing faculty.”

Filling the faculty positions may become more difficult in the coming years due to a shortage of qualified nursing instructors.

Krull explained that only 3% of

nurses in the state of Oregon hold a graduate degree or higher.

“In addition, small towns like Walla Walla have an even smaller pool. We are fishing in a very small pond, but God has sent us some outstanding new faculty so that we will have a 100% master’s-prepared nursing faculty starting in January,” said Krull.

The WWU School of Nursing is approved by the Washington State Nursing Commission and the Oregon State Board for Nursing. More information about the outside accreditation process can be found at acennursing.org.

CONTEXT

ASWWU 04

Senate

TO BUILD A HOME

UPDATE

AIA FUNDRAISING WEEKEND NOVEMBER 14-16

Old Business F.L. 1 ASWWU 2014-15 Budget Approval F.L. 2 ACA Student Care Packages G.L. 6 Amendment to the ASWWU Bylaws

New Business P.L. 13 P.L. 14 P.L. 15 P.L. 16 Open Forum Senate Listens Update

FRIDAY THE PROJECT

Each year the Associated Students of Walla Walla University (ASWWU) adopts a mission project.

As a University, we are reaching out to help those in need. ASWWU’s project for 2014-2015 is “To Build A Home.” Our goal is to raise funds to help build a new orphanage for the children of Kasese, Uganda. We have partnered with a non-profit organization called Christalis whose mission is to “aid children who are orphaned, poor, exploited, starving, in danger, and simply lack basic needs.”

Thus, this has become our mission as well. Currently, the children live in quarters much too small to healthfully accommodate them. Since the current facility is rented, they also live in constant fear of eviction. Owning a home is essential to the growth and development of the facility and those involved. Christalis already owns 2.5 acres for a potential home, but they have yet to obtain the financial means to build one. With the help of ASWWU and its supporters, we will be raising funds and actively participating in the construction of a new home for the orphans. We need all the help we can get and hope that you will join us in our endeavor “To Build A Home.”

GOAL

Raise $100,000

SPRING MISSION TRIP

Vespers Duct Tape Offering Service begins at 8:00 P.M.

SATURDAY Warren Miller Film FAC Auditorium Film begins at 8:00 P.M.

SUNDAY To Build a Brunch WEC 10:00 A.M. - 12:00 P.M.

Over Spring Break 2015, a group will be heading to Uganda to help aid in building the walls of the new orphanage. If you are interested in being a part of this trip or want further details, please use the contact information listed on the page!

BECOME INVOLVED

“To Build A Home” is your project as well. A collaborative effort is needed to accomplish this goal.

There are numerous ways you can become involved.

Donate - Look for upcoming “To Build A Home” donation jars around campus and the community.

Or, use the contact information to ask about how you can become a donor.

Participate - Keep an eye out for upcoming events!

Volunteer - Email us if you want to help with events or if you are interested in the Spring 2015 Mission Trip to Kasese, Uganda.

Spread the word - Tell your friends and family about “To Build A Home!”

Social Team

POSITIONS

If you would like to work for the social team, email aswwu.social@ wallawalla.edu.

Student M

PERSPECTIVE

05 PDX & ACA/SM

AMBULANCE LIGHTS RIVER

davis Culture Writer

pl0x.com

The ambulance lights flash behind us. I pull over to let it pass as it speeds past our school and towards the hospital next door. I slowly turn onto our street, heading back to our warm dorm rooms and comfortable lives. At the same time, the ambulance screeches into the ER carrying someone whose life may have just changed forever. By the time I am comfortably back in my room, nurses will have an IV started, perhaps even a ventilator or chest compressions. Cuttingedge medicine will be pumped through IVs and high-tech machines will monitor the patient’s vitals. The doctors’ and nurses’ skilled hands will instantly call to the years of schooling they endured for that one fleeting, critical moment in the ER. All the studying, poring over drug reference dictionaries; all the skills labs, and all the tests that seemed so boring now may be the reason this patient will continue to live.

Sometimes I wonder if it’s all worth it. All the nursing care plans, the tests and quizzes, the drug memorization.

But at times like these, I realize the worth of this knowledge.

People essentially put their lives in our hands, and it’s our responsibility to make sure that life is safe and sound. This goes for any profession: Engineers, businessmen, graphic designers. Society depends on us, and it’s our job to make sure we don’t let them down.

So here’s to not giving up. Midway through the quarter we are all getting drained, but remember the bigger picture, and think of the difference you will make in the end. From our campus to yours, stay strong and study hard!

falling skies and the

P.M.

moon that keeps shining

KARI

gomez Student Missionary

Assumptions are the greatest deception. No matter how many times you are told that the mission field is nothing you can ever prepare yourself for, you cannot help but paint a picture of how things are going to be. You prepare yourself for poverty and an ever-present guilt about your privileged lifestyle. You prepare yourself as much as humanly possible for a life you do not end up living. I painted myself an illusion whose reality was a near polar opposite.

Truthfully, the reality has broken me more than my illusion did, and it all has to do with a little girl named Luna and a self-destructive world.

Expecting to be teaching children of the lower class whose parents run food carts for a living, I ended up teaching children whose parents were fashion designers, business moguls, restaurateurs, and everything of the like. I had eight-year-olds with iPhone 5s, high schoolers comparing Gucci to

fant-asiatravel.com

Juicy, and middle schoolers who spent every weekend in some of the world’s best vacation spots. While these children had seemingly everything money could buy, they lacked many possessions of no monetary value: support, understanding, respect.

I walked into a classroom full of students who ran out of the room in fits of rage, who threatened and bullied each other to tears, and who dreaded every moment of school because of it. My students’ wealth did nothing to change their living in a rather racist, sexist, ageist, and prejudiced culture. Although some of them were only three years my minors, I shot through like a Western boomerang, refusing to give up until things were changed. Somewhere between lectures on racism, teaching please and thank you, and insisting that they could do anything they applied themselves to, I fell in love with every single one of them. Amongst them all, there was

one twelve-year-old girl in particular, Luna.

Luna would loop her little arm through mine during reading and refuse to let anyone take her spot. She listened with intent, her big hazel eyes swimming in the curiosity of youth.

Always the first to arrive and the last to leave, she’d fill my days with the persistence of reading suggestions and explanations to vocabulary and social events she did not understand.

She was my little half-Japanese, halfNepali angel. She was my little moon.

As Westerners, we know that even the most privileged of places is not devoid of corruption, and though my heart was not ready to leave my babies behind, I left Bangkok three weeks ago with a heavy heart and an itchy throat.

Ubon welcomed me with everything I love — quiet streets and pollution free skies — yet all I could think about was the purple, starless sky of Bangkok,

illuminated by the moon.

I went through the motions; teaching, laughing with the friends I was finally reunited with, and screaming at the sight of cockroaches, but I couldn’t help but feel like the sky was caving in. Despite constant reminders that my departure was necessary, that things were better now, safer now, happier now, I couldn’t see a home here. My little moon’s emails left me in tears and I wanted nothing but to go back and read to her, sort through the library’s collection of Roald Dahl and laugh over his characters’ schemes. I missed hearing her insisting that I give her a piece of gum and giggle uncontrollably whenever I tripped on my heels or pushed the sliding door open. My missing her, and my other students, only made me resent my new location.

It happened one night, while riding home on my bicycle, that I came upon

a realization of sorts. Gliding through the quiet streets, trying to ignore the stares of the local people, I realized [foreign] missionary teachers here were few and in between. I turned the corner and tried to stubbornly quiet the thoughts I knew were to come.

The night was dark, with little lighting my path save for a few street lamps and a tiny little moon in the sky. Maybe I am here for a reason.

There are many hearts here that have yet to touch me because I’ve been so busy keeping my own heart hundreds of miles away. Three weeks ago, my body was in Ubon, but my heart was in Bangkok. Today, it’s slowly moving in the right direction.

It is my duty to make this place my home. It is my duty to love the people here, because this is where I am. I am growing to be okay with this because I know I will always have my little moon shining down on me, no matter where I am.

CONTEXT

SNAPSHOTS 06

Monica Culler

Caleb Riston

Erick Juarez

Monica Culler

ASWWU

ASWWU

Monica Culler

Monica Culler

Erick Juarez

Vitaliy Krivoruk

CONTEXT

07 WEEK IN FORECAST

Week in

Vitaliy Krivoruk

Mac Ford

THURSDAY

November 13

h 34°

Senior Class Organization ADM 116, 6:30 P.M.

16 lincolnrestaurant-dc.com

15

FRIDAY h

November 14 36°

Vespers, SAU Chaplain Brennon Kristein and TBAH Duct Tape Offering University Church, 8:00 P.M. Prayer, Praise, and Popcorn, Prayer House, 9:30 P.M.

SATURDAY 2

November 15 36°

Sabbath Seminar, Dan Lamberton

17 November 17

2 43°

456th Anniversary of Elizabeth I taking the English throne in 1558

241°

WEC 10:00 A.M. - 12:00 P.M.

Open Mic

The Atlas, 7:00 P.M. (Performers please arrive 30 minutes early.)

18

UPCOMING EVENTS

19 dpsinc.com

wikipedia.org

MONDAY

November 16

CTC 105, 10:30 A.M.

FAC Auditorium, 8:00 P.M.

Monica Culler

SUNDAY

TBAH To Build a Brunch

TBAH Weekend, Warren Miller Film

Kurtis Lamberton

ASWWU

leone-keeble.com Mac Ford

Monica Culler

FORECAST 13 14

TUESDAY 2

November 18 46°

CommUnity, Dale Partridge, “People Over Profit University Church 11:00 A.M.

WEDNESDAY w

November 19

ASWWU Movie Night, The Hunger Games: Catching Fire

University Church Fellowship Hall 9:00 P.M.

46°

Thanksgiving Break!

November 24-28

PERSPECTIVE OPINION 08

WE’RE ALL A LITTLE BIT METRO WHICH ONE OF THESE MEN IS WORTH MORE?

ALEX

lemnah Perspective Editor

“And why do you worry about clothes?”

-Jesus Metrosexuality is a word that originally referred to heterosexual men who cared quite a bit about their personal appearance. I will avoid expanding on recent conversations regarding sexual orientation by liberally applying this definition to the populace at large, regardless of sex or orientation. For our purposes metrosexual is one who cares overly much about their appearance. I am sure most everyone agrees that caring “overly much” is, by definition, never a good thing, so I will set out to explore what “overly much” might be on our campus in the 21st century.

Let me propose that of the relatively few different groups that are and are not recognized on this campus, the metrosexual population is the largest. The supporting evidence for this bold assertion is that if you look around at your peers between classes, you’ll notice that everybody looks so darn good all the time. Hair is generally groomed, shoes are generally stylish, and clothing is generally handsome.

This doesn’t happen by accident, of course. This is the result of expensive and devoted individual effort.

It isn’t surprising, either. Look on WWU’s website and you’ll notice we claim to be a Christian institution. Christians are, of course, generally well-groomed, conscientious individuals. Well, conscientious as in self-conscientious, as in self-con-

Ffashiongrunge.com

scious. Conscientiousness would be the awareness that false fronts of perfection shouldn’t be necessary, so perhaps our effort to look good as Christians speaks more to self-consciousness than anything else. I’ll get to why this is later, but first let me get everyone off the hook by saying that things are the way they are because we were raised this way.

We were trained to be good little boys and girls when we were young, so of course we still desire to fit into the category of “good” as little men and women — and what better way to do this than by the way we dress?

I can actually think of no worse way. To believe that our outer appearance reflects our inner state is to ignore the age-old advice that judging a book by its cover is silly.

Tell a sad man to wear an expensive suit and ask him if he is still sad (if his sadness is real, he will be). Are you a better person on Saturdays because you dress well? Obviously you’re a better person on Saturdays because you go to church, not because you dress well (I’m not-so-obviously being sarcastic). People believe that there is a link between the outer appearance and the inner being because, unfortunately, we have established one. Our physical appearance doesn’t express our emo-

tions; instead, we allow our emotions to fluctuate with our physical appearance. We become self-conscious the moment we allow our sense of self-worth to hinge on our

“For a group of people who claim to follow a dude who tells them to stop worrying about pointless stuff, we Christians sure do spend a lot of time concerning ourselves with pointless stuff.” outfits. This is where Christians very often prove themselves to be self-conscious. For a group of people who claim to follow a dude who tells them to stop worrying about pointless stuff, we Christians sure do spend a lot of time concerning ourselves with pointless stuff.

If you read this week’s feature article — which is brilliant, by the way — you might detect that the world’s obsession with clothing has only ever damaged the earth

rgbstock.com

and all of its inhabitants. As there are gradually more and more people who are gradually more and more concerned with their clothing, the destructive impact of fashion-awareness will only exponentially increase.

True Christian conscientiousness might require non-involvement in the trend of looking good all the time.

Or it might require redefining what “looking good” means. I’m sure you’ve been told you’re special and beautiful and unique just the way you are. You are. What would happen if you believed it?

It scares and saddens me to know that I have peers who can’t go to class unless they’ve applied makeup or gelled their hair just right. I write somewhat scathingly because a lot of preventable things have to go wrong before a person’s value matches the price tags on their clothing — and it angers me that these wrongs are often self-perpetuated in a Christian culture that was originally supposed to prevent these kinds of things. Jesus loves you no matter what, but of course you have to look respectable, right? To rationalize a concern for fashion is to not take Jesus’s words very seriously.

So what’s the difference between caring about appearing good and

caring “overly much” about appearance? Nobody wants to look shabby — I get that. What I don’t get is why people go to such great lengths to avoid “looking shabby” when they are actually trying to avoid feeling shabby about how they look. If the real concern is how you feel about yourself, it seems easier to base selfworth on something longer lasting than jeans or a jacket. If you’d like, you could read the rest of Matthew 6 for suggestions on what and what not to hold onto for self-worth.

The exciting thing about metrosexuality is that you are the only one who can determine whether or not its definition refers to you. You are in complete control of your own metrosexuality. If you are completely unsure whether or not you are a metrosexual, stop for a moment and check the tags on your clothing. If you are wearing an article of clothing that is partially made from a nonrenewable resource, has been shipped halfway across the world at least twice, has been handled by underprivileged underpaid citizens in a communist regime, or somehow or other contains fragments of your self-image, you may be a metrosexual. In other words, you’re a metrosexual if you are willing to buy clothes at the expense of the world.

Oops, we’re all a little bit metro.

PERSPECTIVE 09 RELIGION

larsarasota.com

MY Absolution

“For as the Father raises the dead and gives them life, so also the Son gives life to whom he will.

The Father judges no one, but has given all judgment to the Son, that all may honor the Son, just as they honor the Father. Whoever does not honor the Son does not honor the Father who sent Him.”

gbstock.com

— John 5:21-23 (ESV)

BENJAMIN

ramey

Religion Writer I cried.

It doesn’t happen very often, but when it does the tears fall hard.

I called a pastor/friend/counselor of mine and said, “I can’t handle not being able to do right. Why am I still making these same mistakes?”

My friend gave me a few simple tips of advice like, “If you feel bad about being alone with that girl, just decide to go do something that doesn’t involve fogging up the car windows,” and “Relax, since you were raised in an Adventist home you think everything that doesn’t involve reading the Bible or singing in church is wrong.”

I knew better, and I felt extremely guilty that I was continually screwing up; the guilt manifested as an intense pain in the pit of my stomach. I couldn’t eat or find motivation to do anything except feel guilty and sleep.

My shortcomings weren’t disastrous; most of us wouldn’t even label some of them as sin.

I was like that guy in class who always complains about how stupid he must be because when he got an 88% on a test that more than half the

“He raised His friend from the dead and allowed a prostitute to give him a foot massage at a dinner party to teach a lesson in humility.” class failed. All the while everyone else just wants to smack him across the mouth.

Then he told me about Jesus. He said I wouldn’t get over the way I felt until I truly understood who Jesus was. Now, three years later, I’m

still putting together the pieces that make the image of Jesus clearer in my mind.

According to the Gospel of John it is the Son of God who has the power of judgment. While it’s a false dichotomy to set up a difference between the judgment of the Son and the judgment of Father, being the good Trinitarians that we are, knowing that Jesus is our judge did me some good. Not because I was frightened by the fanciful idea of an end-time judgment when the books are opened and I stand condemned until Jesus reminds God for the billionth time that my sins are forgiven. Rather, I had it in my head that because my conscience was constantly troubled, I must not have been listening to the Spirit, which would have meant that I wasn’t hearing God’s voice, which would mean I’m not one of his true sheep, which might mean that I’m lost!

Deep breath, Benjamin.

Jesus was not after a sort of robotic perfection, I was. He called people to think and be passionate lovers, not to be so wrapped up in their own pious standards that they lose sight of what it means to be human. Following Jesus does not mean that I need to lock myself up in a cloister so that I will never face a dynamic situation.

Like Bell told Ebenezer Scrooge, “You fear the world too much.”1 Jesus dined with social outcasts because He wanted to; He raised His friend from the dead and allowed a prostitute to give him a foot massage at a dinner party to teach a lesson in humility. It is this man who is my judge.

When I insisted on living up to my own imagined standard of perfection before, I turned parts of my life that should have been full of beauty and meaning into guilt. Since then, I’ve moved past that self-indulgent perspective. While I still contribute to the destruction of the shalom that is supposed to be between me, the earth, and my God, I know that Jesus still calls me friend. His death, like the chivalrous buddy who sneaks their debit card to the waiter regardless of whether we wanted them to do so, paid for my sins.

“Do not marvel at this, for an hour is coming when all who are in the tombs will hear his voice and come out, those who have done good to the resurrection of life, and those who have done evil to the resurrection of judgment.”2 I have done both good and evil, but fortunately, according to these verses, it is Jesus who is my judge

at this resurrection. Jesus’ judgment is found in His humanitarian efforts and in His unwillingness to give up on any individual. Even when the rich young ruler turned away because the cost of discipleship was too great, Jesus remarked, “With man it is impossible, but not with God. For all things are possible with God.”3 I am not afraid of the judgment of Jesus because as I learn more about who He truly is, I understand that through this judgement He gives life. Judge away.

1

http://tinyurl.com/23hnkc

2

John 5:28-29 (ESV)

3

Mark 10:27 (ESV)

FEATURE koreabridge.net

FABRIC FABLES 10

Fabric Fables ARE WE WOLVES IN SHEEP’S CLOTHING?

U ALEX

lemnah

nless you are an avid streaker or belong with Tobias Fünke in the non-mythical category of Nevernudes (gymnophobia, it’s a real thing), you are likely in direct contact with some sort of fabric at least 23 hours a day. This means you spend 96% of your day touching foreign materials, which is actually a conservative sum. If you are similar to me you often take the liberty to skip shower day — we’ll leave it at that — and on the days you do shower you have better things to do than waste an hour’s worth of water down the drain. Yes, your shower habits affect the world; in fact, so do your clothing choices. In this featureI examine your choices to hang certain materials from your shoulders and I consider where these materials come from, where they are going, and why it’s ludicrous that the answer is almost invariably “Asia.” By the conclusion of this piece, the perspective of a hand-me-down king raised in too-large hemp t-shirts might make some sense. And if you don’t give a rip about this article, at least ask yourself what the story of your clothes might be, because here’s the plain and simple truth: you want your threads to tell your story but you don’t know the story of your threads.

Perspective Editor

Thread Trends

About fifty years ago, when our moms and dads were asking for peanut butter sandwiches from their moms and dads in the 1960s, shopping trends were drastically different. On average, households spent less than 10% of their budget on clothing and shoes and each person within the household acquired about 25 garments per year. Roughly 95% of these garments were manufactured in the U.S. Today things are a lot different. Households now spend less than 3.5% of their budgets on clothes and shoes, which would represent exceptional progress if it weren’t for the fact that each individual in a household now acquires about 70 garments a year (more than one purchase per week) and only 2% of these garments are made in the U.S.1 So what changed? Well, everything. We no longer live in the world our parents did when they were our age. To map all the changes in consumerism since the 60s would exceed the parameters of this article, so instead, I will explore just a few changes that have revolutionized the economy of fabrics. But first, a brief overview of what materials we are dealing with.

s

FEATURE

11 FABRIC FABLES

THE MAIN CULPRITS:

Cotton Some scientists have discovered samples of cotton tucked away in caves believed to be over 7,000 years old.2 Whether or not this timeline is accurate, it can confidently be inferred that Adam and Eve, had they known what we know today, could have thrown on some fashionable threads instead of those embarrassingly dull (and inadequate) fig leaves. Turning their Edenic cotton into deep V-necks would have required the same few steps that it does today: cotton is harvested and then machine-processed in steps that sound like dirty club dance moves (roving, spinning, weaving, warping) that separate the cotton fibers from their seeds. These fibers are then ordered into tight-knit webs that are woven around massive looms and can then be fashioned and sewn into clothing.3 Despite the fact that the U.S. has had a large cotton growing presence for the past 200 years — our history books should have made it abundantly clear why — most of the processing and fashioning and actual clothing-making process happens overseas.

In fact, over 65% of our home-grown cotton gets exported to foreign countries while only 20% gets shipped to U.S. textile mills.4 So where does our cotton go? China, of course. One third of all the cotton produced in the world is processed in China.5

Silk

Silk’s history is as seductive as its name suggests. Essentially, the Chinese held the secret to harvesting the silk from silk worms as long as they could, and eventually word got out (people were hiding worms in their hair) and the Western world got onboard with the magical silkworm around 550 A.D. It was once a luxury reserved only for the Chinese Emperor, then it was spread among the royalty of many different nations, and now it is circulated among the royally rich and those pampered with money enough to buy the fabric.

The process seems simple: silkworms, blind (and now) flightless moths, have to be properly cared for so that they happily cocoon themselves in silk before they are boiled to death and the cocoon is unwound onto a spool. One individual silkworm cocoon produces a single filament that is between 600 and 900 meters long, and between five and eight of these filaments are intertwined to form one thread of silk.6 In reality, the actual procedure for properly feeding and storing the finicky Bombyx mori silkworms is such a headache that it’s not surprising only the stupidly rich throughout antiquity were interested. Silk only accounts for about 0.2% of the global textile market, though due to its high value, it is still a multibillion-dollar industry. The price per unit of silk is about 20x that of cotton. Who produces the most? China, of course. France and Italy are strong competitors, so what about U.S. silk? We have no processing capabilities of our own, so we import almost all of our silk but we don’t import nearly as much as Europe does because our history with silk is relatively short and U.S. consumers demand the convenience of “easy-care” fabrics.7

Linen Polyester

It is said that flax, the plant from which linen is made, predates almost all other agricultural plants and has been dated back to use in Egypt around 3,000 B.C. Given that the other two naturally occurring materials (cotton and silk) are also dated to the time of Adam and Eve’s period of nude gardening, it is only important to know that linen comes from a real plant and real plants are as old as Adam and Eve are (figures range between 6,000 to millions of years old).

So we can’t really celebrate flax’s birthday, but we can celebrate the fact that before cotton became the cheapest textile option in the New World, thanks to our illegallyimported free labor, linen may have been the most important textile in the colonies during the small window between the first landing of the Pilgrims in Virginia in 1607 and the touchdown of African slaves in Virginia in 1619. Like the slaves that put it out of business, flax has been marginalized. Flax requires the most skilled labor to process and has therefore fallen off in the competitive market of who can make what the cheapest.

First, the long fibers just inside the bark of the flax plant have to be harvested. In theory, it sounds simple. The problem, however, is that harvesting this fiber requires difficult manual labor. Separating the fibers from the woody stocks is a task too delicate for machines but too difficult for American industry standards, so most linen production happens overseas, almost invariably in Russia. Russia produces about 90% of the world’s flax crops (is anybody detecting an alarming link between communism and textile production?). Of course there are a few hippies in the hills who harvest their own flax, but it is almost definitely the case that your nice linen bed sheets have passed through the hands of at least a few Russian field workers.

Polyesters are the bane of natural fibers, the arrow to the Achilles heel of the honest textile industry (and just like there was no Achilles, there has probably never been an honest textile industry). Polyesters were discovered in a laboratory in 1926 by W.H. Carothers, who was at the time researching what would eventually become nylon. The pace of their development was quickened as several companies bought each other out and squabbled over who would become the next megacorporation world power. A few emerged, like DuPont in the U.S. who released the fiber Macron in 1951. Needless to say, the material swept through the textile industry and left it forever changed.

It was instantly (and has remained) the fastest growing textile because it is easy to make and even easier to use.8 So what is it made of? Well, mostly petroleum (a fancy word for crude oil, which is a weird way of saying fossil fuel). Ethylene, which is combustible and has thousands of eerie uses, is the primary chemical. It is derived from petroleum and goes through a process of polymerization that renders it able to be pulled and strung out in long ribbons. Just a few simple steps and a few more chemicals later, polyester yarn is wound on big bobbins and is ready to be shaped for your back, or your legs or head or the couch or curtains or any number of its infinite applications. Yes, polyester clothing is plastic that is made to feel better than plastic.

FEATURE

FABRIC FABLES 12

Where are the Wears?

In the textile industry, the Darwinian principle of survival applies to those who can produce the most for the cheapest. It’s as simple as that. The U.S. was doing fairly well even through the 70s and 80s when textile mills began popping up in Asia and Latin America. In 1980, a few key companies like Gap Inc. and J.C. Penney began outsourcing their factories overseas so that they could furnish American closets on slave wages. The real clincher came in the 90s with the implementation of policies like the North American Free Trade Agreement that eliminated duties and restrictions on imported clothing. Things went to hell in a finely-woven Chinese hand basket as American manufactures were absorbed by the competition. In just 20 years, almost one million manufacturing jobs in America vanished. Though we as Americans represent the largest consuming force the universe has ever known, we literally can no longer afford to create the goods we consume.

Progress can only begin once we question the need instead of the price on the tag. A t-shirt made in a sweatshop in India will cost less than one made by hippies in Seattle, a

large reason being that the average American garment worker makes 38 times the amount that the boy or girl in Bangladesh makes. So I ask you: why don’t you buy half the amount of t-shirts for twice the cost? The cost isn’t the problem.

The problem is that we live so fat here in the U.S. that others have to be skinny somewhere else in the world. It is greed alone that has us shipping our largely petroleumbased products (try finding pure cotton clothing) on petroleum-guzzling machines to a country where the people are so oppressed that they’re willing to spend their lives cutting clothes and sheets to send back to us on our oil-guzzling machines all so that we can be up to date with the latest fall fashion. Look at the map of the journey a T-shirt takes to land on your back (see below) and know that it takes thousands of gallons of oil and lots of oppression to get from where it started to you. Unless you make your own clothes, don’t wear clothes, or buy everything second- and third-hand, your shopping habits are directly linked to modern-day slavery and the ethical regression and literal death of this world.

The Journey of a T-Shirt

theguardian.com aect.cuhk.edu.hk

Garment factory workers in Bangladesh

1. Cotton grown in Texas 2. Cotton shipped to China; t-shirt manufactured nytimes.com

3. T-shirt shipped to Washington D.C. 4. T-shirt put up for sale in New York 5. Rejected t-shirts re-purposed and sent to Tanzania

The extensive sock market in Datang, where factories produce more than a third of the world's socks. http://blogs.kqed.org/lowdown/2013/05/24/madeinamerica/ https://www.cotton.org/pubs/cottoncounts/story/ 3 http://www.cottonsjourney.com/storyofcotton/page6.asp 4 http://www.cotton.org/edu/faq/ 5 http://westernfarmpress.com/us-cotton-export-horizon-broadens

http://www.silk-road.com/artl/silkhistory.shtml http://www.tradeforum.org/Silk-in-World-Markets/ 8 http://www.madehow.com/Volume-2/Polyester.html 9 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/05/03/hemp-sustainable-crop_n_5243351.html

http://www.cottonsjourney.com/storyofcotton/page6.asp http://www.cotton.org/edu/faq/ 12 http://www.cotton.org/pubs/cottoncounts/what-can-you-make.cfm

1

6

10

2

7

11

FEATURE

13 FABRIC FABLES

One Bale of Cotton Can Make:

12

249 215 Bed Sheets Jeans 690 2,104

Terry Bath Towels

1,217

Men’s T-Shirts A large, modern [cotton] mill can produce enough yarn or thread in 30 days to wrap around the earth times.10

2300

What’s Next?

Boxer Shorts

99%

In 2013, of the U.S. upland [cotton] crop was planted in transgenic varieties — geneticallyengineered varieties resistant to worms, herbicides, or both.11

No, shopping at thrift stores doesn’t make you a hero, it still indirectly links you to the monster that is textile industry. However, like all recycling, it does lower the ratio of impact to use. It makes the sweat of a sweatshop worth a little more.

A great way to stop others from bleeding and sweating on behalf of your clothing is to shop locally. This means buying products made from relatively local materials. Washington State isn’t even on the list of U.S. cotton growers, but guess what it can grow in abundance? Hemp.

Requiring half the land and half the water that cotton does, hemp is just one of many smarter option fabrics that outscores traditional crops in sustainability.9 It doesn’t need to be the product of the future. With some concerted effort on the behalf of American consumers, it can be the progress of today.

Changing the amount of fabrics we consume is more important than changing the type of fabric. If individual greed is the culprit of the global disaster of capitalism plainly obvious in the textile industry, it will take individual effort to reverse the trends. Every t-shirt you don’t buy is another that won’t have to be produced for you. If you think it’s too inconvenient to revise your lifestyle, then at least own up to your impact and know that every convenience you experience comes at a high price for someone somewhere. You can either think about this article or ignore it, but you can’t take it seriously and carry on normally. Only if you were insane would you continue eating a cake that you knew was poison — unless you looked good while you ate of course, because that H&M jacket does look so damnably good.

Changing the amount of fabrics we consume is more important than changing the type of fabric.

LIFE

FOOD 14

CARAMELIZED ONION AND SPINACH ARTICHOKE QUESADILLA RACHEL

PETERSON Food Writer

I’d love to get feedback from you! If you have any comments or suggestions for recipes you’d like to see featured, send me an email at rachel.peterson@ wallawalla.edu

I don’t always make quesadillas, but when I do, I am reminded of how fabulous they are. Like a pizza or a sandwich, there is a wide variety of toppings that can be used depending on your desired flavor and your preferences. The idea of a quesadilla certainly isn’t anything new, but I find this recipe to be an innovative approach.

thegardengrazer.com

Feature

RECIPE: ONION AND SPINACH ARTICHOKE QUESADILLA

Makes 4 Servings 2 tsp. olive oil 1 yellow onion, sliced 1 orange bell pepper, sliced 2 c. spinach

I N G R E D I E N TS

4 large flour tortillas 1/2 c. spinach artichoke dip 1 c. shredded Monterey Jack cheese 2 tbsp. butter

I N ST R U C T I O N S 1. Heat the olive oil in a pan over medium heat. Add the onion and bell peppers and cook, stirring often until onions are soft and golden brown in color. Add spinach and cook until wilted. Remove from heat.

2. Spread one side of the tortilla with spinach artichoke dip. Layer with 1/4c. of the cheese. Divide the cooked spinach and onions evenly between the four tortillas, or save extra for later.

3. Heat another pan over medium heat. Melt a little butter in the pan. Add the prepared tortilla to the pan and cook until the cheese is melted. Fold the tortilla in half and flip from the cheese side over to the vegetable side. Use a spatula or a fork to press the edges of the quesadilla together. If making all four servings, repeat the process. Serve with salsa and any other of your favorite condiments.

Note: Folding the quesadilla in half rather than layering one tortilla on top of the other helps to keep the ingredients intact and eliminates the mess when flipping the quesadilla. This simple trick cuts out a lot of thegardengrazer.com

frustration and is also a great way to gauge a serving size.

Adapted from neighborfoodblog.com

r.com

LIFE

15 CULTURE

“DAD”

MUSIC

I used to think that music ages, but maybe it just gets different.

RIVER

DAVIS Culture Writer “Ah, finished!”

I exclaimed as I connected the last speaker wire to the car stereo. My little Saab 900 was all fitted with brand new, state-of-the-art speakers. Time to try these suckers out, I thought. I plugged my iPod into the auxiliary cord and blasted some old, Jay-Z tunes. Just as the beat dropped, my dad came trundling out of the house.

“How’d it go, son?” His dad-stache danced with every word.

“Good! The bass is great.”

“Here, let’s test them with some REAL music,” he suggested as he slipped an old Neil Diamond CD into the stereo. The thumping bass and crystal clear rap vocals were instantly replaced with an old guy crooning over a muffled guitar.

“Now THAT’S more like it. Just listen to that sound!”

I feel like we should invent a new genre. I would like to call it “dad music.”

Generally speaking, it can be described by us kids as outdated, boring, and definitely not fit for testing brand new car speakers. From my experience, this “dad genre” includes musicians like The Eagles, The Gaithers, Willie Nelson, Olivia Newton John, and the ORIGINAL Les Miserables soundtrack.

At some point, every child is forced into appreciating “dad” music.

Whether you were raised with that way of thinking or a conversion was attempted in your later years,

CAR TALK:

when dad is passed the aux cord, it automatically turns into a music appreciation class and everyone in the car must know that The Carpenters led the golden age of music. We would all roll our eyes and try to drown it out with our earbuds, blasting All American Rejects.

Eventually, we get tired of hearing the older folks brag about how good music used to be. I used to think that this was an ignorant statement because I thought our music was pretty revolutionary. Crystal-clear quality, heavy bass, and musically flawless tracks thanks to modern musical production technology grace our songs today. How could anything be better than that?

But I remember one warm summer night sitting in my old Saab 900 with my dad listening to his music. The song was “Desperado” by The Eagles, and I remember feeling a new, strange

appreciation for the music. I could actually hear the raw guitar tones, the simple drumset beat, and the clean, classy lyrics singing about a lost love. There was no overproduction of the song — no cheap electronic drum loops or sonic pitch correction bending the vocals, none of the loud over-compression that squashes all the music we hear on the radio today.

It was just a man and his guitar, with a few buddies jamming with him. It was revolutionary. At some point, we are all going to be “dads.” We will try and convince our kids that Taylor Swift was the best thing that has ever happened to the music industry, but they too will roll their eyes as they plug their iPhone 17s into the stereo and play their newfangled tunes.

So give dad a shot. If I had a nickel for every time my dad referenced Neil Diamond as God’s gift to the music industry, I would probably have a couple hundred bucks. Just the other

day I was at Goodwill and found an old Neil Diamond vinyl. A pang of nostalgia swept through me as I remembered. All of the long road trips growing up with dad at the wheel, blasting Neil Diamond through the car speakers. I picked up the record, paid money for it, and let it spin on my turntable back in my dorm room.

Well played, dad. Well played.

Some “Dad” musical artists to check out: -The Carpenters -The Original Les Miserables Soundtrack -Neil Diamond -Olivia Newton John -The Wedgewood Trio

This week I would like to use this space as a tribute honoring the passing of radio legend Tom Magliozzi. NPR aired the popular comedy radio program “Car Talk” featuring “Click and Clack the Tappet Brothers” (Tom and Ray Magliozzi) as hosts. Folks could call in and ask their automobile-oriented questions to these two brothers and receive hilarious banter in return. The brothers were famous for their infectious laughter, snide remarks, and brilliant car knowledge woven between jokes, snorts, and well-meaning insults.

For those of you who remember the lazy Sunday afternoons listening to the dynamic duo belly-laugh and make fun of the caller’s 1985 Buick, you will have fond memories of the clean, lighthearted humor of the Magliozzi brothers. Ray Magliozzi states that he would like NPR to continue to air reruns of Car Talk in memory of his brother. Here is to the many years of laughs and shady car advice shared with the world by this legendary man we came to know and love. May you rest in peace, and thank you for making this world a little more lighthearted.

LIFE

FASHION 16

take a

LOOK INTO Matt Hagele

20, Bio-Engineering I’ve had several requests to feature Matt as the next style profile candidate. Many of you have seen him around with his cool, polished look. When I asked him about his style inspiration, he pulled up the blog mentioned below and I was positively shocked. I love to see men who are actively searching for fashion inspiration. Keep it up!

STYLE PROFILE Q&A A: Who or what is your style insporation?

ALYSSA

hartwick Fashion Writer

M: Dan Trepanier from tsbmen.com A: If you could raid anyone’s closet whose would it be?

M: At the moment it’s gotta be Dan T.

ALYSSA’S TIPS FOR THRIFTING

A: Do you thrift, and if so, do you have any advice for aspiring thrifters?

There are several really great thrift stores in Walla Walla filled with M: I am quite new to thrifting but made two successful purchases potential treasures just waiting to be found. Although it takes quite a at the local Goodwill just a few weeks ago. I found a Canali blazer bit of patience and a sharp eye, thrifting is perfect for finding unique, and a Burberry jacket for the grand sum of $38. The only suggestion inexpensive, and recycled items.

I have is to make sure the jackets fit properly in the shoulders.

1. Skim racks for color and texture to save time. When you see Everything else can be tailored. something that pops out, pull it off the rack. Don’t waste time sorting through clothes on hangers.Try it on and make a decision from there.

A: Do you prefer to shop online or at a store? What is your 2. Determine if the piece has potential. There are a lot of items that favorite place and why? only need a bit a tweaking in order to make them ready-to-wear.

I once bought a consigned leather bag that was slightly worn. I M: I prefer to shop in a brick and mortar store, but will definitely cleaned and conditioned it and brought it back to life. purchase things online once I’m familiar with the quality and sizing the store offers. My favorite stores are probably Suit Supply, 3. Look over the item. Make sure someone didn’t get rid of J. Crew, Nordstrom Rack, and Taylor Stitch. The last one is a it because of any obvious defects such as stains, holes, or JACKET | Kane Unque brand new San Francisco based clothing store that designs and tears. If the item is defective, decide if it’s fixable. If it is manufactures all their clothes in California. It’s a pretty sweet fixable, decide if it’s a project you can realistically take up. place.

TIE | Robert Talbot If you aren’t willing, put it down and continue your search.

Happy thrifting! Be sure to check out: -Goodwill -SonBridge -St. Vincent De Paul -Antique Mall of Walla Walla -Yeehaw Aloha Thrift n’ Gift Store

A: What is your favorite piece of clothing and why?

M: My favorite piece of clothing would probably be a tie passed down to me by my grandfather. It’s a real Faconnable from back in the day and really shows that quality lasts and stays in style far longer than usual.

SHIRT | Show Supply SHOES | Kickers PANTS | Pants-Gant (Michael Bastian collaboration)

All photos by Alyssa Hartwick

PERSPECTIVE 17 CW/CW

Creative

Collegian

WRITING

ABIGAIL

wissink

WISDOM

THE DAY IS NOT YET DONE

If you’d like to submit your poetry, prose, songs, or any kind of creative writing, email me at abigail.wissink@ wallawalla.edu

Yik Yak?

BY: ANDREW WOODRUFF

Creative Curator Andrew attended Walla Walla University from fall of 2012 to spring of 2014, and will be returning to our fine institution next quarter. I am excited to see any new work that he brings to Open Mics, and am especially appreciative of his commentary on sleep as we get closer and closer to Dead Week and finals. I hope you enjoy his work as much as I enjoy his friendship. Happy reading!

U.S. scientists discover virus that makes humans more stupid

Two women stabbed in dog poop dispute Sounds like a ruff situation

My goal, to sleep

To count each breath

Nothingness envelop me

Instead of sheep

Waning stress and passion

For the day is not yet done

Fading feelings leave me now

One thing left undone

But the day is not yet done

It must be reached before the morn

Not clock, nor moon can govern me

The day is not yet done

No rhythm in this limbo

The sound of sleep

I confess, my eyes see little

The creek of night

My mind desires darkness

Call from friendly corners

Intent upon distracting me

Loudly my heart protests them

But the day is not yet done

One thing is all I need to know

I cannot move yet

That you sleep safe and warm

Mind and body paused in time

For the day is not yet done

Alike in their intent

Until I promise you goodnight

The wealthiest 0.1% have same share as bottom 90% of U.S. wealth Bottom 90% not surprised

CNN typo mistakes Obama for Osama

video vimeo.com/aswwu

POV: Barn Party

Radical Islamists offended, switch to Fox

Unemployment rate hits six-year low Statistics don’t include college graduates Lemur from Zoboomafoo passed away at the age of 20 Me and you, forever.

A freshman let us into his head at last week’s event.

Eric Weber

LIFE

#THECOLLEGIAN 18

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LIFE

19 HUMOR

thecollegian

SNAPCHAT

“COLLEGE ISN’T THE PLACE TO GO FOR IDEAS” Folks, it’s week seven, which means Thanksgiving Break is around the corner. As Will Ferrel would say, “Thank you Baby Jesus.” I’m ready for a break but will attempt to power ahead, keep it together, and only wear sweatpants three times this week, maybe four. To liven your mood, we will be exploring specific majors and some of their associated stereotypes. Enjoy or don’t. If I have forgotten a few, email me; I would love to hear some more.

COLLEGE MAJORS’ INNER MONOLOGUES ON SUNDAYS THEOLOGY HISTORY ENGLISH NURSING #JESUS

HIGNORANT

EMARGERD ERNGLERSH

NOTORIOUSLY NUMB

“The answer is always Jesus, homework is done. Now I can focus on finding a wife.”

“I guess I’ll sleep in till 11:00.

Catch up on Netflix. Bake a cake. Read a little and embrace the constant state of denial and ignore the four 20-page research papers due at the end of the quarter. Procrastination station.”

“I love coffee. I love talking.

I love cats. I love thinking of something to write regarding this obscure old person. I do not love that guy across the coffee shop that is using the word ‘whilst’ incorrectly.

Should I get up and correct him or just yell?”

“How do my teachers expect me to learn how to save lives while I am struggling not to take my own by suffocating myself with this textbook? I just want to sleep.”

AVIATION

“Ooooh, my studying consists of flying, recording hours and having fun. Must be sure to take a selfie, post on Facebook, and make all the losers on the ground and in the library jealous. Suckers.”

ENGINERDS

BIOLOGY

BIOLOOKING

BUSINESS BORED

COMMUNEMPLOYED

“Holy shiitake mushroom, I’m so overwhelmed; there is no time to shower or eat anything that is not prewrapped. Because I have no money or time to go to the Atlas, the stimulus of coffee will have to be substituted with the occasional adrenaline rush of interacting, smelling, or being within proximity of women.” If you are a woman engineer in Kretchmar: “Why is that guy staring at me and why does it smell in here?”

Looks in mirror for encouragement to finish O.Chem. assignment. “Oh hey there self, you look gooood.

Those eyebrows and nose hairs are trimmed to perfection.

You are going to look so good in scrubs in about 5-10 years.

Those dental hygienists and nurses at Loma Linda are going platz. However, that O. Chem. assignment, it doesn’t look so good.

“I have no homework, but all of my friends are doing homework. I guess I’ll just sit in the Atlas, drink a double chocolate shot, heavy on the whipped cream, mocha and look at fancy cars I may someday lease. BMW, Mercedes, or Dodge Gran Caravan?”

*Hangs up phone* “How many times do I have to convince my parents that my degree is meaningful? Wait… how can I tweet this moment and every one of my future thoughts in the best way possible?”

ENGINEERING

COMMUNICATION

LAUREN

lewis Humor Writer

Title Game: Whoever is the first to identify the author of my title and email me at lauren. lewis2@wallawalla.edu will receive a baked good (Hint: Disabled, but still awesome).

Competition Winner: Week 4 Brooklynn Larson

LIFE

TRAVEL 20

travel

& OUTFITS

plzkthx.com

imgur.com

timesunion.com

SHANNON

pierce

Travel Writer The most important question to ask yourself before going on a trip: do I want to wear a practical, a comfortable, or a classy outfit? This problem adds to the stress of packing and making it to the plane on time. There are four main types of travelers: the “I-just-rolled-out-of-bed-and-planon-sleeping-through-the-flight,” the “I’m-casual-tee-shirt-and-jeans,” the “business causal,” and the “too-casualfor-a-banquet-but-overdressed-forvespers.”

The airport is a lot like a university campus around 8:00 in the morning.

At this time, people are trying to get to their first class to sleep through, and no one cares what you’re wearing.

They can barely stay awake for class.

In the airport around this time, people’s heads are in books, staring longingly into a cup of coffee, or

sleeping. You are mostly safe from judgment. However, being a “casual outfit” girl, I tend to judge those who wear 5-inch heels for a flight that lasts for six hours.

People who dress up for flights are intriguing. What makes them want to dress up when there’s the possibility that a child may puke on them on the plane? However, I give them props for wearing heels and cat-walking from terminal to terminal. When I lived in the dorm, I could barely make it from the dorm to the church for vespers without stumbling. It’s awesome that they can do it so gracefully, but at the same time, why would you do that to your feet?

The business casual types are the ones that have no choice regarding what to wear. They have to wear suits because typically they have a work dinner or a meeting as soon as they get off the plane. However, you can see the longing for stretchy waistbands on some of their faces. If I had to wear a pantsuit from Walla Walla to Portland, MA, I would be less than thrilled. Trying to keep it looking fresh and smelling good is difficult with all the recycled air. On the bright

side, they look good — they’re not trying too hard, but they’re also not slacking.

The casual types opt for the jeans and tee-shirt. They’re not trying too hard; they’re still a little uncomfortable, especially if wearing a belt, but it’s the perfect outfit for a short trip if they’re not going straight to a meeting. Dark jeans hide the dirt, which means they can be messier people.

look abnormally padded and large.

The cheapest airlines only allow one free carry-on the size of a backpack, so you wear a ton of layers just to get everything on the plane. The bonus is that you aren’t cold and won’t bother a stewardess for one of the pitifully thin blankets.

Then there are the people who dress in sweats or yoga pants. I can never wear sweats outside of the house (my own personal thing — no judgment on others) but I finally bought some “hipster” sweatpants from H&M that I wear on long flights. I always wished I could be as brave as those souls.

They looked so comfortable in their sweats, Toms, and sweatshirts with vests. To those who wear these typical American passenger outfits, I say, “you go Glenn Coco!”

As the theme for this issue is fabric and clothes, my other concern on this topic and travel is shopping in Europe. It’s fun to say, once and only once, I got this in Europe, but there’s actually a lot of struggle involved with buying something from Europe. First, they size differently from the U.S., so you better get used to standing in line for the dressing rooms. Second, it’s almost depressing shopping in Europe, because a size 6 in the U.S. is equivalent to a size 10 in Europe. Even though size shouldn’t matter, it’s a psychological issue that gets me every time.

When you are traveling in a different country, let alone a different continent, the typical outfits change.

People in Europe tend to be dressier than Americans when the fly. How to spot a tourist in Europe: they’re sweating, their face is red, and they

When I visit a new country, I try to get a cultural outfit. Obviously, in some countries like England, Ireland, or Germany, it becomes more of coat or hat that says it’s from that country.

France, Switzerland, and Italy are the expensive high-end fashion countries.

However, in places like Greece, you can’t leave without getting something Greek. Just like visiting a third-world country on a mission trip or during a Student Missionary year, you may end up getting one or two outfits that are typical to the culture. It’s polite to the locals because it shows you respect their culture and you’re willing to fit in (even though you will wear them only a few times once you’ve returned to the States). The memories associated with the outfit will always bring a smile to your face.

reece, you something hird-world or during a u may end its that are olite to the ou respect ng to fit in them only eturned to associated ys bring a

21 ADS MOVIE NIGHT

Catching

FIRE

UDAYS| 15 At Walla Walla University

Know someone who should be here?

Invite them to U-Days! March 5–8, 2015. We’ll help with travel expenses (up to $250 available per visitor).

They’ll see WWU…and YOU! Text, call, email…tell them to sign up for U-Days right away!

Early bird deadline Dec. 15.

Nov 19th at 9:00 PM Fellowship Hall of the University Church Refreshments Will Be Served

thai cuisine

10% off 1 entree

with valid student id

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MARCH 5-8, 2015 WALLAWALLA.EDU/UDAYS

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dine-in, take-out, or delivery

LIFE

SCIENCE 22

CURRENTC: AN OVERVIEW

de.wikipedia.org

DANIEL

hulse Science Writer Over the past few weeks you may have seen something in the news about a new payment system called Currentc that has caused quite a controversy. Or you might not have seen it. Whether or not you’ve seen or read anything about Currentc or know what it is, here’s some background information for mobile payments, Currentc itself, and some of the reasons for the controversy. It’s worth knowing because the future of how we pay for things is dependent on the success or failure of this platform.

Mobile payment apps are apps that let users pay for items using just a cell phone. So far, the major players in this business are Apple, Google, Microsoft, Softcard, and PayPal, each of whom have implemented this concept in different ways. Google launched Google Wallet in 2011 in conjuction with Visa and Mastercard to work in all “PayPass” and “payWave” EMV terminals — terminals that work with the new “chip and PIN” cards that can be tapped instead of swiped

for increased security. Microsoft and Softcard (formerly Isis mobile wallet) both launched similar products in 2012, and Apple has since jumped on board in 2014 with Apple Pay, which uses specialized hardware in the phone to authenticate and has popularized the idea of mobile payments as a convenient method of payment.

Lastly, PayPal has allowed mobile payments through its app for quite some time without any NFC or PIN system instead using just like one would for online purchase. 1

payments use the same technology as cards, those fees still apply to mobile payments. Those fees can cut significantly into the profit margins of large retailers that depend on selling a great deal of product at low profit margins (like Walmart and the other retailers in the MCX), so any way for those retailers to cut that out would greatly increase the amount of money they make. To bypass those fees,

of money to the MCX. This is anticompetitive, and also caused many notable retailers like Rite Aid and CVS pharmacy, who previously took payments through Google Wallet and Apple Pay, to decline those forms of payment. There’s an obvious reason to be mad here: no matter how much customers say “shut up and take my money,” places with the equipment to take payments through Google Wallet and Apple Pay simply won’t.

There’s an obvious reason to be mad here: no matter how much customers say “shut up and take my money,” places with the equipment to take payments through Google Wallet and Apple Pay simply won’t.

Currentc is a mobile payment system developed

by Merchant Customer Exchange (MCX), a joint venture of many large merchants, including Walmart, Target, Lowe’s, 7-Eleven Inc, Sears, and Best Buy, to compete with the current payment service.

Unlike Google Wallet and Apple Pay, Currentc does not use NFC chips but instead requires customers to scan a QR code or enter a PIN. 2

While MCX claims the reason for introducing Currentc is to combine mobile payments and loyalty programs, it’s fairly obvious that they have an ulterior motive. Credit card companies and banks charge merchants fees for each transaction involving a card. Since most mobile

Currentc primarily pays directly from checking accounts. 3 So what’s all the controversy about?

What’s wrong with another way to make payments? Well, most of the issues with Currentc are because of bad implementation. Retailers who have joined the MCX are obligated to use only Currentc, which means that retailers who offer Currentc as a method of payment must use it exclusively for three years for mobile payments or suffer paying large sums

The reasons to hate on Currentc don’t end there.

Using Currentc seems to be one of the most clunky ways to pay for something, next to paying with a check. To pay with Currentc, one must scan a QR code generated by the point-of-sale with the Currentc app. If a QR code isn’t generated, the customer must then enter a 4-digit pin. In its first few weeks of launch, the app’s website was hacked, revealing the email addresses of an unknown number of users. On top of that, signing up for Currentc requires a social security number and a driver’s license, making the program’s poor security reputation beyond sketchy.

Because of all of these issues, the

Internet has lashed out at Currentc in ways that could possibly end it for good. Users in Reddit’s /r/apple and /r/android subreddits have started a boycott on all retailers that have joined the MCX. This same effort has dropped the rating on the App Store and Google Play store’s rating to one star. Before this outcry, it was unsure if Currentc was going to succeed, but now it seems fairly clear that it won’t, as the group who are usually the early adopters of technology have rejected it outright. This is all great news for the rest of us, who hopefully won’t have to put up with such a bad experience when paying for things. http://www.usatoday.com/story/ tech/2013/10/08/paypal-paymentcode/2939731/ 1

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Merchant_ Customer_Exchange 2

http://techcrunch.com/2014/10/25/currentc/

3

LIFE

23 SPORTS

NASCAR’S UPDATED ================

PLAYOFF SYSTEM

ago, NASCAR did not have a playoff system. A driver who had a good year could wrap up the championship with races still to go to.

pedia.org

img2.wikia.nocookie.net

ALEX

wagner Sports Writer Texas:

The green flag waves in Texas.

All of the scheduled 334 laps are completed, but a winner is far from decided. The race goes into overtime.

NASCAR has implemented a new playoff format this season which is comparable to a bracketstyle elimination tournament. This tournament is called The Chase, and puts more pressure on drivers than ever.

Needing a win to get out of the eliminator round and into the final championship race, Jeff Gordon led the field of cars to the finish line for a two-lap overtime shootout. Gordon and teammate Jimmie Johnson were side by side headed into turn one.

NASCAR driver Jeff Gordon

Gordon slid up the race track entering the turn, but made an attempt to slide back down on the exit. The problem for Gordon was fellow Chase contender, Brad Keselowski, believed he could get through this changing gap in the middle of the turn. Keselowski and Gordon collided, giving Gordon a flat tire. Gordon’s shot at winning the race was gone, but this wouldn’t be the last time these two came in contact that evening.

Johnson went on to win the race, and Keselowski finished third, but Gordon finished 29th, a huge blow.

As the cars filed down the pit lane in preparation for post-race inspection, Gordon pulled his car up next to Keselowski’s, got out of his car, and both teams jawed at each other. Words were exchanged between the drivers, resulting in a brawl. Both drivers came away from it with fat lips and blood on their faces.

So, what created this tension between drivers? Even before the Gordon/Keselowski incident, there have been post-race confrontations between drivers this season. The answer to this question really stems from the new Chase format. 10 years

Over the past several seasons, NASCAR has used a different version of the current Chase format. It rewarded the playoff-eligible driver who was the most consistent over the course of the final 10 races. This season the new bracket elimination style puts a tremendous amount of pressure on the drivers to win. Once Chase begins, every three races, four drivers will be eliminated. It takes winning or really strong finishes to help ensure a driver’s safety.

If Gordon had won the race, he would have been locked into the one race championship round as the highest finisher among the last four Chase eligible drivers. But because of his incident with Keselowski, Gordon’s chances have been severely hindered.

Was it fair, or right for Keselowski to challenge Gordon in trying to pass when there wasn’t really room? “I’d rather have enemies in NASCAR than have friends and be sitting at home.

When there is a gap [on the track] I have to take it,” answers Keselowski.

Gordon disagrees, “He made an over-aggressive move. Those moves are fine if you’ve got a slamming, banging race. But he cut my left rear tire and that was it for me.”

The next question is, was Gordon’s post-race behavior appropriate? The brawl drew national coverage across many non-sport-affiliated news networks and has been a hot topic of conversation. But it wasn’t really spun in a negative light like a fight.

One way to justify behavior is to analyze the subsequent results. This past weekend, one week after the Texas race, the NASCAR circuit moved on

to Phoenix for the penultimate Chase race. Eight Chase drivers in the field of 43 competing cars hoped to move on to the championship. But only four of them would advance.

Arizona:

All eight had their sights set on winning the race. For most of them, winning was the only way of assuring they would get into the championship.

The eight eligible Chase drivers ran a really strong race and put themselves in a position to compete as the race progressed.

As NASCAR hoped, the determination of seeing who would advance to the championship unfolded in dramatic fashion on the final lap, starting with race leader Kevin Harvick. Harvick entered the day eighth in points and getting a win was the only way he would be able to get in.

Fortunately for Harvick, he had the car to beat all day, and wound up winning, securing his championship spot. But here is where it gets interesting.

Jeff Gordon was able to put together a great race, and found himself up front most of the day. He didn’t have the car to beat Harvick, but Gordon was fast. Looking at the Chase picture, if Gordon finished second, and fellow Chase competitor Ryan Newman finished in 12th place or worse, Gordon would advance to the championship and Newman would miss the cut.

On the last lap, Gordon was running in second place, and Newman in 12th.

This held steady for three more turns, with Gordon finishing in second place.

In a matter of seconds if Newman stayed in his current spot, Gordon would compete in the championship next weekend. As Newman entered the final turn, he drove the car into it as hard as he could, with no intention

of hitting the brakes.

The extra speed was enough to get him right next to the car holding 11th place. The two cars collided, but Newman held strong. Ryan Newman came across the finish line in 11th, punching his ticket to the championship.

Gordon’s crew chief radioed into him what had happened, and that their playoff hopes were now over. This was a tough way to lose, especially after coming so close to winning the week before. Remember, Gordon dropped from first place to 29th because of that wreck, and that ultimately is what cost him his season.

While the results didn’t end up the way Gordon would have liked, the drama of the Chase format has been great for NASCAR. After his win Sunday afternoon, Harvick said, “This is what it must feel like to hit a walkoff in extra innings” Harvick is right; to win the race facing the circumstances he was up against is incredible, and the same applies for Newman. To make a last-second pass to move into the championship round puts the excitement of a NASCAR finish on a similar level of other great sporting finishes. A goal in stoppage time, a buzzer beating shot, or as Harvick said, a walk-off in extra innings.

This Sunday in Miami, Harvick, Newman, Denny Hamlin, and Joey Lagano will be the four Chase racers competing in a 43-car field, where the highest finisher among those four competitors will come away with a winner-take-all championship.

NASCAR is exciting again.

Other Cheek

the

EXACTLY WHAT YOU’D EXPECT

Fabric and textiles are everywhere. Many of the most memorable stories I can think of revolve around fabric in one way or another, whether it be fun Goodwill adventures with your friends to find your new favorite sweater, avoiding getting pantsed on the playground, or the awkward bikini mishaps that every Badventist girl has endured. These are just a few examples of how important fabric can be.

ABIGAIL

wissink Backpage Writer

One:

Two:

Three:

Last year during the throes of Dead Week, I was studying on a couch in the Reading Room of the library. One of those ridiculously oversized beanbag chairs was in the other corner, behind that wall where no one can see you. As I was reading/studying/hating life, I realized that someone in that hidden corner was snoring. I grabbed my phone and sent a disgruntled Snapchat to a few friends with the caption “Someone is snoring in the library. Loudly.” A few minutes later, all of these friends got a similarly structured Snap, except the caption read “Plot twist: it was my best friend. HA.”

When I was in elementary school, I had a friend whose family wasn’t doing well financially. They worked as hard as they could and put their kids through Adventist education without aid from the school. As we all know, private school isn’t the least expensive option, but the parents weighed the pros and cons and chose what they thought was the best for their kids, even if it meant not having enough money to afford the most “cool” clothing for their children.

My freshman year, I was in a production here at WWU called Mother Courage and her Children. I played Kattrin, Mother Courage’s mute daughter who sacrifices herself to save a town at the end of the play.

During the scene change after I died heroically, I had to lie down on a stretcher to get carried out at the end of the final scene. In one of the performances, I didn’t place myself 100% correctly and had my head a bit too far forward on the stretcher. When the poor fellow on my anterior side picked me up, we realized just how dire of a mistake I had made. Face, say hello to pant seam.

Beware the dangers of sitting on those plushy beanbag chairs, friends. They’ll get you every time.

“

“Do you ever just walk into a bathroom and know someone’s having a rough day?”

– Brooklynn Larson

“I’ll take my pipe home so no one’s afraid of it anymore.”

– Karl Wallenkampf

“Your paper’s format is interesting because it’s wrong.”

– Professor Dan Lamberton

“I dunno. You know who does know? Wiki-the-pedia.”

– Professor David Crawford

If you hear something funny, cringe-worthy, or that could be hilarious out of context, send the quote to me! abigail.wissink@wallawalla.edu

“

VERBATIM

My friend was bullied on a regular basis for the clothing he wore. The worst offenders? The pastor’s daughters, who received aid from the school to be able to attend and wore the “cool clothes” to school every day. My friend left the school three months later.

And yes, this is my go-to embarrassing story when someone asks for one.

HaikuREVIEW INTER

VIEW

Each week I write riddles in the form of haikus about places around campus, popular books or movies, or something random of my choosing. The first person to email me with a correct guess as to what I’m referencing will be mentioned in next week’s Review. Email me your guess at abigail.wissink@wallawalla.edu

Where is your favorite place to shop around town?

“The only place I’ve gotten clothes from so far is Goodwill.”

-Gabrielle Pahler

“There really aren’t that many places, are there? Don’t write that down. Honestly, one of the most fun places is Goodwill. But I also shop at Macy’s and Maurice’s.”

-Amanda Eldevik

“Uh, shoot, I don’t know. I don’t shop for clothes in Walla Walla.”

-Kai Kopitzke

This haiku leads to a room up three stories high with red carpeting.

Here is your last hint!

Extension two-one-two-one will help get you there.

Don’t forget to email me your guess! The first person to email in last week with the correct answer, Positive Life Radio, was Tyler Sherwin. Good job, Tyler!