Volume 101 Issue 06

The Collegian Walla Walla University

Volume 101

NEWS

3 NOV 2016

The Final CountDown

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Issue 06

15 ACA

19 FOOD

dear reader,

Editor-in-chief Matthew Moran

context

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After many months of hearing the interesting and, quite frankly, horrifying remarks about and from the presidential candidates, the final days leading up to the 2016 Presidential Election have arrived. Many of us may be relieved that the pain of hearing about Hillary’s emails or Trump’s comments are finally over. At this point, you probably already received a mail-in ballot and made your choice about who would be best fit to lead America. However, since we have one last installment of our election series and one last chance to talk politics, we would like to inform you about political systems.

Before either candidate takes their place as president (or, perhaps, Gary Johnson or Jill Stein or Gloria Estela La Riva as I saw in my Los Angeles County ballot), we would like to examine the political environments that they might create or sustain.

You might notice that we have a couple of pages devoted to articles that

perspective

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ASWWU

Table of Contents | 2 Apologies & Responses | 3 Opinion | 4 News & Senate | 5 Week in Forecast| 6 ASWWU Photos | 7 Global Service | 8

editor-in-chief Matthew Moran

layout designers Anna-Marie Vargas Claudia Curtis Geoffrey Lopes

assistant editor Abigail Wissink

news writers Kyler Alvord Lauren Epperson

Head layout editor Fränk Ramirez Head Copy editor Sophia Rich Life editor Micah Hall backpage editor Lauren Wahlen

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contributing writers wished to publish in this week’s issue. If you want to publish something, simply let us know so we can make your opinion heard. The Collegian is designed to foster discussion and encourage student involvement.

You might also notice that we have an apology regarding last week’s issue.

I hope that you will read that apology and grant The Collegian your forgiveness for any misunderstanding. The Collegian strives to uphold the values of Walla Walla University and the Adventist church. If we present articles that do not uphold the values of the university and the church, or if we do not provide equal arguments in favor of the views upheld by the church, please send us an email immediately so we can ensure that The Collegian maintains its high standards.

We will ensure that this doesn’t happen in the future. We hope that The Collegian can continue to be a platform for various opinions and expressive works while upholding the core themes of Walla Walla University.

Copy Editors Katherine Beckner Lindsey Luna food editor Mason Neil feature editors Brandon Pierce Michael Jensen Ysabela Ramirez Bryndilynn Goodlyn humor writer Micah Hall religion writer Vixie Bailey Cartoonist Emmanuel Perry

If you have any comments, questions, advertisements, or contributions, you can email me at matthew.moran@wallawalla.edu or aswwu.collegian@gmail.com. Thank you for reading The Collegian. As always, enjoy and IPFY (i.e. I’m praying for you) every day!

life

PIXABAY

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Feature | 9-11 Devotional | 12 Opinion | 13 #thecollegian | 14 Religion & ACA | 15 Column & Creative Writing | 16 Travel | 17

opinion writer Yvanna Hammen-Alvarez Joshua Huh columnists Joni Harris & Emily Huso

ANGELICA CHAN

Humor & Snapchat | 18 Food | 19 Fashion | 20 Cartoon | 21 Science | 22 Little Woman | 23 Sunny Side Up | 24

If you are interested in contributing to The Collegian, speak with one of our illustrious staff members. The Collegian is enhanced by regularly incorporating a wide range of campus perspectives.

Devotional writer Christina Moran Fashion writer Angelica Chan Culture/travel writer Darling Su ACA/SM Editor Stephanie Septembre Science writer Jordan Brooks

Cover Credit: cnn.com/politics The Collegian is the official publication of ASWWU. Its views and opinions are not necessarily the official stance of Walla Walla University or its administration, faculty, staff, or students. Questions, letters, and comments can be sent to aswwu. collegian@wallawalla.edu or matthew.moran@wallawalla.edu. This issue was completed at 1:00 A.M. on Thursday, November 3, 2016.

Creative writing editor Mac Ford global service writer Daniel Villarreal Office Manager AnneMarie Vixie

The Collegian | Volume 101, Issue 06 | 204 S. College Avenue, College Place, WA 99324 https://issuu.com/aswwucollegian

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APOLOGY/RESPONSES CONTEXT

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AN APOLOGY I

n last week’s issue of The Collegian, we published a satire article entitled, “Jesus had Gay Grandfathers.” This article went through our multi-tiered review process and we made specific changes to the article and to the editor’s note to ensure this article was seen only in a humorous light. However,

we recognize that what we published wasn’t an appropriate joke for Family Weekend and crossed the line. We apologize for any misunderstanding and we hope to clarify that the views expressed in this article are not upheld by either The Collegian or the University.

We aspire to high standards at The Collegian and we seek to uphold the values of this university and the Adventist church. We represent and write for our fellow students, and we stand for the critical analysis of issues relevant to the University, the valley, the Adventist church, and the world at large. We

hope that everything we publish—whether that be a feature or a humor article—will be in accordance with Walla Walla University’s core themes: excellence in thought, generosity in service, beauty in expression, and faith in God.

WHAT YOUR RED HAT

TELLS ME ABOUT YOU: RESPONSES Brennan stanyer Contributing Writer

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n October 20, 2016, an article titled "What Your Red Hat Tells Me About You" was published in the Opinion section.

In this article, the author argued that those who support the Trump campaign by wearing his signature red hats are guilty of the same bigoted action and words that he spews.

This concerned me, as it was not a mature or well-reasoned argument at all.

Instead of telling us what “your red hat tells me about you”, the author showed what “your red hat” tells you about me. By stereotyping Trump supporters and treating

YsaBela ramirez Contributing Writer

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ver the last couple of weeks, it has come to my attention that the character (or lack thereof) of Trump supporters has come into question. It is worth pointing out that it is just as easy to question the character of Hillary supporters who are unphased by her rampant corruption and incredible ability to lie without blinking an eyelash. But I don’t think questioning one another’s character is particularly useful at this point. I really believe we all want what is best for our country and for the women and men in our lives. With almost 20 percent1 of our student body voting for Trump, it is only right that someone speak up to clarify what our red hats really say about us.2

LATIMES

them like caricatures of the worst aspects of the Trump campaign, the author has proven himself to be no better than those who he claims “[bother him] deeply”. It isn’t fair to criticize without offering an alternative position, so here it is. I would offer my opinion on and to those who choose to support “The Donald” openly on campus.

I will be following the “What Your Red Hat Tells Me About You” (and vice versa) formula in this article response, so without further ado, let’s get into it.

I’m not going to say that you are wrong for supporting a candidate. Instead, I’m going to say what your open support of Donald Trump tells me about you. If I’m wrong, please send me an email explaining why. Supporting Trump does not mean that

you yourself are a racist, sexist, etc. It does, however, mean that you are supporting a candidate who has proven many times over to be these things. Even if you plan to hold your nose and vote for Trump because he isn’t Clinton, you still fall into this same group. By supporting a candidate who holds these views, you are giving voice and validation to these divisive and hateful beliefs. By not standing up against these beliefs and actions, you are saying that at some level, you are ok with them. You are not guilty by association, but that doesn’t make you innocent either. Trump’s rhetoric is dangerous and represents the terrifying reality that millions of people live with every day, so by supporting his campaign in any fashion you are not standing up against his

dangerous behavior. That is why I don’t respect you and your hat. Not because it tells me you are a racist or that you hate women, but because it tells me you don’t care enough about the groups he oppresses to put aside political leanings and take a stand. I don’t respect racists, I don’t respect sexists, and I sure as hell don’t respect people like you who won’t speak out against them.

If you want to change my (and many other people’s) opinion of you and truly care about making America great again, then take a stand against racism. Take a stand for the women in your life. Speak up for those who have no voice. That is how you will gain my respect. Not by supporting a political candidate, but by supporting those in this world who truly need it.

My red hat tells you that I support a candidate who has fought real battles for equality between African Americans, Jews, and White Americans. In the 90’s Trump went against the southern social order by opening a golf course in Palm Beach that was open to all people, including Jews and African Americans. He believed so strongly in this ideal of equality that he filed a lawsuit against the city for discriminating against his business because of it’s openness to nonwhite customers.3 My red hat tells you I support a candidate who has helped propel women to executive positions through his career. A 1989 edition of "Savvy Women" published a cover story that detailed the career paths of three women who had made it to the top of Trump’s organization entitled “Surprise! Mr. Macho’s Inner Circle isn’t an All-Boy’s club.”

Today, Trump shows his appreciation for

women and families by dedicating an entire section of his platform to help women juggle motherhood and work—a plan his incredibly successful daughter Ivanka, who is an open woman’s advocate, has endorsed and worked on personally.

My red hat tells you I support a candidate who believes every child deserves to grow up in a safe neighborhood—no matter their race or socioeconomic status.

Donald Trump supports our police force because people can only thrive and move forward if they do not have to live in fear of violence and theft.

My red hat tells you I support a candidate who believes the quality of education you get should not depend on the neighborhood you are born into. Donald Trump has endorsed school vouchers for this very reason.

It is important in this turbulent election season to have some perspective. Instead of suggesting that people who disagree with us do not care about important issues such as racism and sexism, we should recognize that we are all working toward a better future. I don’t think it is really the ends we disagree on. Who doesn’t want a society that provides equal opportunity to all its people? It might be that it is the means to on which we disagree not the ends. If we can stop calling each other names, we might be able to get together and talk about those issues that matter most to us and exchange our ideas on how we can fix the problems we face and move into a better future.

1 See The Collegian, Volume 101, Issue 03, Oct 13 2 WARNING: These facts might be shocking and unbelievable.

If you don’t believe me: GO LOOK IT UP! 3 Because this may be too so shocking you won’t even know

what to look up, I have provided a link here: http://www.wsj. com/articles/SB862335923489989500

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CONTEXT OPINION

THE STAFF

Matthew Moran Editor-in-Chief

Abigail Wissink Assistant Editor

Micah Hall Life Editor & Humor Writer

Kyler Alvord News Writer

THE ART OF SMILING

SOMETHING MANY DO, BUT FEW ACTUALLY MEAN IT Frank Ramirez Head Layout Editor

ditor

son

Yvanna Yvanna Hammen-Alvarez hammen-alvarez Opinion Writer

Opinion Writer

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Christina Moran very morning we all walk down the Devotional sidewalk walking to andWriter from classes, passing hundreds of people on the way.

Some nod in approval of one’s existence, others smile, and others still don’t even look Angelicadevices.

Chan Why is it en up from their electronic Fashion Writer ter that the only people who look up and smile at you are the ones who already know who you are or know you personally?

Mac Fordwhat it is that I’ve often wondered Creative causes an unfriendly auraWriting when & passing Contribution Editor er people down the street. I refuse to believe

that that is to be a norm in our culture. This “feel-good chemicals” that make you want to society is so focused on self that we become continue with kind acts.1 Not only that, but Vixie Bailey Drew Sihotang blind to others. I know I’m at fault for this more importantly, it makes the receiver of Religion Writer Religion as well. I Writer fear initiating contact. I personally the smile feel important and loved. Showing do not enjoy stepping out of my shell and positivity and sharing appreciative vibes opening up to vulnerability by smiling at makes both parties feel better on a day-topeople and reaching others first. Many Joni Harris Emily Huso day basis.

Columnist Columnistenter my mind: What if they thoughts don’t Think back to the last time that smile back? What if they don’t look at me someone smiled at you and think about and someone else sees my failed attempt at the way you felt. It’s a sentiment of being friendliness? wanted, a feeling of being loved, and it is Darling Su Mason Neilthese are insecurities ICulture I know have, & Traveloften followed by an urge to do the same Food for others. It’s a positive chain reaction that but I’veWriter decided that it’s time to putWriter all these insecurities aside and tear down my walls. could potentially change the world and It’s time to rebel against what this society revolutionize what we think is “normal.” It is has set as “acceptable behavior. ” Narcissism not normal to ignore people as they pass by.

Daniel Villarreal Jordan Brooks is not acceptable Global Service & behavior in the least.

Science & TechThose people are just like you, just like me.

Focusing on other individuals instead of There is no valid reason to ignore a fellow Global Humanitarian Writer Engineering Writer yourself gives you a boost of self-esteem and human created just the same way we were.

Making sure someone feels appreciated or noticed is vital to our callings as Christians.

It is precisely what Jesus did and proclaimed we should do. There’s a reason for doing that and it is an important one. To feel loved is to feel you have a reason to live and a reason to make others feel the same.

This may very well be just another article in The Collegian, but reader, I challenge you. I challenge you to at the very least smile as much as humanly possible to all who pass you on the street. It is our Godgiven right to love all unconditionally, and that includes a smile.

1 Yam, K. (2015, March 20). 10 facts that prove helping

others is A key to achieving happiness. Huffington Post. Retrieved from http://www.huffingtonpost. com/2015/03/20/international-day-of-happiness-helping_n_6905446.html

NEWS/SENATE CONTEXT

ELECTIONS ARE COMING,

@CNN Politics

ELECTIONS ARE COMING Lauren Epperson News Writer

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s of Sunday, Oct. 30, 9:30 a.m., Hillary Clinton was favored to win this year’s 2016 president election. Clinton is currently leading at 45.6 percent, with Donald Trump following behind at just 40.7 percent, and independent candidate Johnson at 4.9 percent.1 After months and months of political campaigning and endless political advertising, the presidential campaign is coming to a close. With Nov. 8 quickly approaching, citizens all across the country are starting to make their final decision for who they think will best lead the country.

The democratic stance of the United

States makes it possible for its citizens to vote for who they think will make the best leaders for their country. No matter how you feel about politics, as an eligible voter it is your responsibility to make your vote count.

Some people don’t get a say in what is going to happen in their future, or their country. Don’t miss your opportunity.

Be a part of deciding the future; make a stand for what you feel is right. Elections are coming, don’t let them pass you by.

1 http://projects.f ivethirtyeight.com/2016-electionforecast/national-polls/

FAMILY WEEKEND Kyler alvord News Writer

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arents and siblings packed the campus last weekend for WWU’s annual Family Weekend activities and supported the community in the proces.

Every October, WWU invites the families of students to visit College Place.

Though it fills campus parking lots, creates three-hour wait times at Maple Counter and sparks awkwardness when Conard residents run into dads on the way back from the shower, there are a number of reasons why Family Weekend continues to make the schedule.

Family Weekend reunites students with their parents and gives families an opportunity to see #FallaWalla for

themselves. “Family Weekend let my mom meet all my friends and people I’ve made connections with,” freshman Alexa Bassett said. “We went to Tri-Cities one day to do some shopping and we visited the animal shelter in Walla Walla.”

The weekend activities also include the AGA Breast Cancer Awareness 5K, and the influx of parent visitors allows for more participation. The annual 5K run raises money for the Providence St. Mary Regional Cancer Center, helping local women receive the treatment they need.

While Family Weekend may seem unnecessary and inconvenient at times, the positive effect it has on our campus and in our community makes it worthwhile.

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SENATE G.L. 1 - Employee Eligibility Requirements was presented to ASWWU Senate this week. This bill proposes that, in order to hold any position in the ASWWU, an individual must be a dues-paying member of the ASWWU and physically attend classes on the Walla Walla University campus. Get in touch with your local senator if you have questions, comments, or suggestions on this bill.

F.L. 1 - 2016-17 ASWWU Budget was also presented this week by Paul Trapani, ASWWU Financial Vice President. Senate will review the budget, and amend or approve it as they see fit. Be on the lookout for your weekly senate email for a summary of the budget. The full budget will be made available to any ASWWU member upon request through their local senators.

WEEK IN FORECAST FRIDAY

THURSDAY

SATURDAY

nov 3

nov 4

nov 5

After Hour/Boba Tea 7:30-9 p.m. SAC

Ultimate Frisbee 2-5 p.m. Sittner Hall Field

Neon Pool Party 9-12 p.m. WEC Pool

Prayer, Praise, and Popcorn 9:15 p.m. Prayer House

Little Women: The Broadway Musical 8 p.m. Village Hall

SUNDAY

TUESDAY

coming up Nov 10 Screening of “Pride” 8 p.m. ADM 117

DRESS CODE? PATRIOTIC.

nov 6

nov 8ELECTION RESULTS PARTY

Little Women: The Broadway Musical 2 p.m. Village Hall

Election Day!

7–9 PM ON TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 8 STUDENT ASSOCIATION CENTER

HOSTED BY AMNESTY, WORK, ANDAmnesty, HISTORY CLUB Election ResultsSOCIAL Party with Social Work, and History Clubs 6-9 p.m. SAC

Nov 10, 12, 13 Little Women: The Broadway Musical Village Hall Thursday, Nov 11 Women’s Retreat with Janet Wilkenson ABC Mountain Retreat Center 2016 Distinguished Scholar Lecturer: Marilynne Robinson Friday, Nov 11 Essay Reading 6 p.m. University Church Saturday, Nov 12 Discussion 10:30 a.m. & 5:30 p.m. University Church Sunday, Nov 13 Mission Workbee 10:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m.

Blue Mountain Mission Church

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ASWWU PHOTO

ASWWU PHOTO CONTEXT

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CONTEXT GLOBAL SERVICE/CAMPUS MINISTRIES

WHEN HUMANITARIAN WORK GOES WRONG Daniel Villarreal Global Service & Humanitarian Writer

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henever there is a natural disaster, international organizations rush to the affected area. There is a need to provide food, resources, medicine, construction materials, and other relief items. After the 2010 earthquake in Haiti, it only took one day for international organizations to arrive in the disaster zone. 1 In many instances, however, well-intentioned people fail to assess the implications of their actions in both the short and the long term and end up hurting the economy, the infrastructure, and ultimately the lives of the people of the affected zone.

The country of Bangladesh is a clear example. Historical data shows that surface water in Bangladesh has

been contaminated with microorganisms “causing a significant burden of disease and mortality,” especially among infants.2 Some estimates show that about a quarter of a million infants died every year because of the contaminated water.

With this in mind, the United Nations Children’s Fund and the Department of Public Health Engineering worked together to find a safe source of water for the Bangladeshi people. After some debate, they decided that water wells were the most efficient way of providing safe water for a population of more than 60 million.3 They drafted the plans for the location of each of the wells and began drilling until they eventually created more than 10 million hand pumped tubewells.4 One thing they forgot, however, was to take samples of the groundwater. They failed to see that most of the water under Bangladesh contains more than 150 ppb

(parts per billion) of arsenic, more than the permitted 50 ppb.4 The World Health Organization estimates that anywhere from 25 to 77 million people are drinking arsenic contaminated water. This figure is troubling because most of the effects of extended exposure to arsenic, which include skin lesions, skin cancer, and internal cancer, will not be seen for another five to 20 years.2 After the threat was identified, the government of Bangladesh put forth measure to address this public health crisis. It provided water filters, reduced exposure, and closed highly contaminated wells. Yet, progress was slow: 45 percent of the water wells have not been tested for arsenic contamination; of the other 55 percent, 16 percent have been declared unsafe while 39 percent have been declared safe to drink.4 There are plenty of parties to blame, and many things that could have

@Nebojsa Babic

been done better. But there are also many lessons to be learned from this failed program. Knowing not only the need, but the best way to supply for it, is fundamental in humanitarian relief.

The group providing help should know the geographical conditions of the area.

And, after the problem is acknowledge, the humanitarian organization, the government, and certainly every party involved are responsible for fixing the problem.

Perhaps it is not the most romantic way of fixing these kinds of issues, but it is certainly the safest.

1 https://www.britannica.com/event/Haiti-earthquakeof-2010 2 http://www.who.int/bulletin/archives/78(9)1093. pdf ?ua=1 3 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Demographics_of_ Bangladesh 4 https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/

PMC3191694/

WORSHIP OPPORTUNITIES Here are some options for worship activities on campus this week.

Heubach Morning Worship – Mon-Fri 7:30 a.m.

Heubach Worship – Tues 9 p.m.

Fireside Worship – Thurs 9:30 p.m.

Hispanic Ministries Worship – Mon 7 p.m.

Hall Worships – Wed 9 p.m.

Prayer Meeting – Wed 7 p.m.

Vespers – Fri 8 p.m.

@AS

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@ASWWU

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FEATURE PERSPECTIVE

it’s Complicated ... GOVERNMENTS

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POLITICAL SYSTEMS Dictatorship: A dictatorship is characterized by absolute power for one person or party. In recent history, dictatorships have usually been tyrannical in that those in power will do whatever possible to stay in power, without regard for law or their citizens best interest. Famous dictatorships include Hitler’s Nazi Germany, Stalin’s Communist Russia, and Mussolini’s Fascist Italy.3 4 Monarchy: A monarchy is characterized by a single ruling head with power passed down through heredity. Monarchical figures do not always possess much power and may simply be figureheads for the purpose of uniting a nation. Famous examples include England’s monarchy, Egyptian Pharaohs, Israel’s kings, etc.5 Oligarchy: An oligarchy is characterized by absolute power for a small group. Groups exercising this power have often been classified as privileged and corrupt and has been accused of using its power selfishly and tyrannically.6 Famous examples include ancient Greece, China, and Rome. Although this term is used quite liberally when describing countries systems of government, there have actually been very few true oligarchies.7

THE FINAL COUNTDOWN AS A REFERENCE WE HAVE PROVIDED DEFINITIONS

bryndilynn goodlin Feature Editor Brandon pierce Feature Editor

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y this time in the election cycle, you’ve probably either decided who you are going to vote for and nothing we say will change your mind, or you already sent in your ballot, and even if we could change your mind, you can’t change your vote.1 In light of this, and the probability that you are as sick of hearing about the election as we are, we have decided in this fourth segment of the Election Series to talk about something other than the horrors of Clinton’s scandals and Trump’s runaway mouth. You’re welcome. Instead, this week we will be looking at some of the major political and economic systems, including how they function and popular examples of each.2

There are nearly as many different variations on the theme of government as there are countries. In order to make sense of the variety of ways in which people rule and are ruled-without that political science degree we all wish we had-we must first paint in broad strokes to better appreciate the finer details. Most systems of government can be classified and reclassified according to three important elements: 1) who makes the decisions; 2) on whose authority are they making the decisions; and 3) how (if at all) is power distributed. By asking these questions and evaluating any given system we can determine if power really does derive from a mandate of the masses or if some strange woman lying in a pond really is in fact a basis for a system of government. For the sake of simplicity, we’ll be using Walla Walla county as our makeshift example nation under the assumption that Walla Walla county is no longer part of Washington state or the Union, but is, rather, it’s own sovereign state.

Who makes the decisions and where is the power held? Societies such as Walla Walla that are ruled by a small class of

privileged people are said to have aristocratic attributes. Which group is in charge makes a large difference in the direction of the state’s interest. It would make sense, as a strong “nation” proud of its educational system and top-notch institutions, for Walla Walla to form a government based on Geniocracy: a system that requires the ruling class to be, above all else, intelligent. Unfortunately, all citizens intelligent enough to be included in the ruling class recognize that rule by a single class of citizen is doomed to fail.

Walla Walla soon pivots to the idea of a Technocracy, putting the educated and technical experts of a particular field in charge of society. How about all those technical specialists residing in Chan Shun?

While a society run by WWU’s engineering faculty may sound promising to some, not everyone is on board with the mandated use of engineering paper for every stationery need. Fearing a popular revolt due to the price of engineering paper and mandatory

CONT. ON PAGE 10

Republic: A republic is characterized by power distributed among periodically changing elected representatives and a president.

This power structure, although not infallible, is less easily corrupted and allows the people to have a say in the government. This seems to be the most popular among the political systems, as many countries-including the United States-employ it.8 Federalism: Federalism is a structure that splits government power into several levels.

For example, you can have the national government, the state government, and the county government. They all work together to run our country and create law and order. At the same time, however, they are separate entities and therefore perform separate tasks and have separate powers.

The United States is a prime example of a federalist government.9

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POLITICAL SYSTEMS CONT.

CONT. FROM PAGE 9

Democracy: A democracy is characterized by governmental power held by the people.

Democracy can be split into two types: direct and representative. In a direct democracy, the people hold complete power over the governmental system. In a representative democracy, the people elect representatives to hold governmental power. A representative democracy is pretty much another name for a republic, with the United States being a prime example. On a national scale, there have never really been any instances of a successful, long-term democracy. The only country that has been close to a true democracy was Classical Greece, and even then it didn’t last long.10

completion of the full calculus sequence, the faculty wisely abdicate and talks begin of new systems of class rule including Plutocracy, the rule by the wealthy; Timocracy, the rule of the honorable; and Meritocracy, rule by those according to their societal contribution. Amidst the discussion a new government is formed through the time honored traditions of “might makes right” and big army diplomacy. Walla Walla, that bastion of education set on the path of government with noble goals, soon falls to a Kratocracy: rule by the strong.

The ruling class of strong men and women, somewhat predictably, suffers infighting and the class system collapses all together, plunging Walla Walla into a despotic stage. Despotism is the rule by a single entity with absolute power, culminating in either the Autocratic residence of power in a single person-usually a dictator or monarch-or in the form of an Oligarchy, the rule by a small group of people. These two larger branches of Despotism grant power not based along classist lines, as in the aristocratic forms of government mentioned above, but rather based on who can seize and hold power.

Distinctions between despotic forms depends more on succession than actual structure-the residence and structure of power in absolute monarchies and dictatorships are virtually the same-other forms of monarchies offer concessions to the very historically common absolute rule of a monarch. A Constitutional or Parliamentary Monarchy offers a neat compromise between those who stay in power for the benefits and those who want more from their leaders through the limitation of monarchical powers through laws or formal constitutions.

The absolute ruler of Walla Walla, one King McVay, looks to precedents set by popular constitutional monarchies such as the United Kingdom and the Commonwealth, Japan, and Norway and concedes some rights to the general populace in order to keep his cushy office in the Administration building, while keeping other rights for himself and his designated heir.

Anarchy: An anarchy is characterized by no government whatsoever. Although it may sound wonderful to some, it has never been successful and usually results in the emergence of a dictator as a knee-jerk reaction to the loss of law and order.11

ECONOMIC SYSTEMS Fascism: A fascist state is an extreme right political state that assumes total power over labor and commerce without regard to the needs of the people. Usually extremely militaristic and nationalist, a fascist state does not believe in social equality and is very elitist. The suppression of personal freedoms in fascist states are often compared to what is found in a communist state. In recent history, some of the most famous fascist states have been Hitler’s Nazi Germany and Mussolini’s Fascist Italy.12 13 Capitalism: A capitalist state is a moderate right political state in which power over labor and commerce is controlled by the individual. The ideal of capitalism is bound up in the traditional notion of the American dream, which strives to offer equal opportunity. Ideally, in a capitalist society, the harder one works, the better off he or she will be monetarily. This, however, has been pointed to as a route to an unequal society since it allows for the individual to do better economically than his neighbor. America is an example of a traditionally capitalistic society, although recently has become more centralized between capitalism and socialism/welfare state.14

“

Most systems of government can be classified and reclassified according to three important elements:

1 Who makes the decisions

2 On whose authority are they making the decisions

3 How (if at all) is power distributed.”

Monarchy is a historically popular form of government, largely based on the divine right to rule by a god or gods. While Adventism is adopted as the state religion of Walla Walla, freedom of worship is guaranteed to all religions and our proud state continues. That is until a few unruly history students pay attention a little too closely to HIST 466, decide that there are too many Vice Presidents, and begin talking amongst themselves in those abominable centers of free thought and discussion: coffee shops.

Soon outlawed by the church and Head of State based on “religious doctrine,” coffee shops move underground and with them, the growing revolutionary sentiment. Protesting the increasingly intimate relationship between the state and the church, the collegiate youth of Walla Walla, a demographic majority and representative minority, begin fomenting rebellion and soon a full scale popular revolt envelops the state. King McVay and the church hierarchy flee to their holy city of Loma Linda. Revolutionary Walla Walla splits into two rival factions, each insistent their proposed system is best, and soon falls into Anarchy and Mob Rule (Ochlocracy).

While most of the populace agree that Anarchy is not the way forward and that changes must be made, ideological lines are drawn regarding how those changes should be achieved. The agricultural and industrial factions advocate a communal system that would grant more power to the large working class base of Walla Walla through the redistribution of resources based on need and not wealth. This proposed communal system, popular with the working men and women

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FEATURE PERSPECTIVE

America’s System: Now that you understand what the major political and economic systems are, we can help you to understand our own system. It is important to understand that governmental systems are composed of several layers of systems, all working together to create the overall governmental structure. America’s system is no different. Structurally, the United States is set up as a federalist, democratic republic. Economically, it currently functions as a capitalist welfare state.

of Walla Walla, draws ideas from variations of Socialism and Communism in watch the means of production are controlled by the state and not by the individual. However, their proposed communist system does not sound appealing to the capitalist business owners from downtown Walla Walla and the Business Department. They advocate a free market economy with private ownership of land and other resources. While both factions agree the new government should be representative of the populace and democratically elected, the economic differences are too strong to reconcile and the Valley splits into two separate states: the People’s Republic of Walla Walla and The United Federation of Walla Walla.

The United Federation adopts a system analogous to the Federalist system of the United States, wherein neighborhoods with their own discrete, local laws elect their own officials to represent their interests in the collective legislative body of the Federation.

These neighborhoods are required to follow local and federal laws, and disputes soon arise regarding interpretations of complex tax codes and bureaucratic red-tape. As some neighborhoods begin growing due to the relative strength of their constituent businesses thanks to the free market economy, other less economically advantaged neighborhoods look to the Federation for subsidies in order to benefit their constituents, some of whom lack the means to afford basic healthcare services. As the wealth gap grows between the rich neighborhoods and the poor neighborhood, the laws and regulations of the United Federation also begin shifting

to better accommodate those same rich neighborhoods who can afford to lobby their interests in the legislative body.

Meanwhile, across the valley, the People’s Republic of Walla Walla adopts a Democratic Socialist Republic, with state sponsored social services including healthcare, education, and public transportation.

While there are no large businesses due to the State control of important resources, quality of life is higher for the average citizen in the PRWW than in the UFWW. Unfortunately, something is rotten in the state based on Denmark, as the People’s Republic has to increase taxes in order to provide the many social services it provides, and due to the relatively lower number of wealthy individuals, those tax hikes fall squarely on the shoulders of the middle and lower classes. With a budget spiraling out of control due to growing corruption of the state, the People’s Republic soon faces an economic collapse and growing dissention among citizens who see their personal wealth shrinking as the state struggles to keep their system afloat.

Both nations soon slide backwards on the evolutionary government scale. While the super rich capitalists in the United Federation seize power after gradually buying off the representatives of poorer neighborhoods and installing their own leader as President, the leadership of the People’s Republic begins cutting social services which results in a decrease in the quality of life.

While the citizens of the People’s Republic still have a say in their cash-poor government, the average citizens of the United

Federation become complacent to the corruption plaguing their cash rich, socially poor government.

How did things get this bad for our fictitious nation? Governments derived from a mandate from the masses are the best types of government, right? Unfortunately, a common trend in democratic governments is the increasing polarization of the voter base. As more and more people voice their interests it becomes clear that the state can not, and should not, provide solutions for every problem, especially as those interests begin to diverge. The interests of an individual making minimum wage and the interests of the business owner paying that minimum wage can differ wildly, and as those with the means to advance their interests do so, those who do not have the means frequently find that no one is willing to listen. Not all governments are created equal; indeed, all forms of government have their flaws. Unfortunately, not all people are created equal either. The frequently touted values of Liberty, Equality, and Fraternity are becoming more exclusive to those who can afford to have a voice. Government is a necessary evil. However with a politically engaged populace, using methods of critical thought and following moral principles, a government of the people, by the people, and for the people can become something those same people are proud of instead of something they lament. Government is complicated and can be incredibly boring, but it is vitally important for those under the influence of the government to actively participate in all levels on a regular basisnot just every four years.

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ECONOMIC SYSTEMS CONT. Socialism/Welfare State: Sometimes seen as the antithesis to capitalism, a socialist state is a moderate left political state in which power over labor and commerce is controlled by the public. A welfare state is a type of socialist state that provides for all citizens economically and socially, but especially those who are on the bottom of society economically. The point of a socialist/ welfare state is to provide equality of outcome among citizens, although some have criticized it for weakening the work ethic of citizens. Countries such as Denmark and Canada are considered socialist economies 15 16 Communism: A communist state is an extremely left political state in which power over labor and commerce is controlled and owned completely by the community.

Communism is basically a more advanced form of socialism. However, pure communism is basically unheard of except for in groups like the early church because in order to get to a communist state, the government usually has to take control of the labor and commerce and ends up looking more like a dictatorship. Famous examples include Communist China, Communist Russia, and the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea (aka North Korea).17

Or you forgot to register and there’s definitely nothing we can do about that.

This is for all of you who slept through government class in high school. #secondchances 3 https://www.reference.com/government-politics/dictatorship-d72856592e963f3d 4 https://www.britannica.com/topic/dictatorship 5 https://www.britannica.com/topic/monarchy 6 https://www.britannica.com/topic/oligarchy 7 http://www.governmentvs.com/en/history-of-oligarchy/ model-17-1 8 https://www.britannica.com/topic/republic-government 9 http://www.ushistory.org/gov/3.asp 10 https://www.britannica.com/topic/democracy 11 http://www.wou.edu/~aramoshernandez06/Anarchy.html 12 Nazism is a form of fascism that includes extreme racism.

13 https://www.britannica.com/topic/fascism 14 http://capitalism.org/ 15 https://www.britannica.com/topic/socialism 16 https://www.britannica.com/topic/welfare-state 17 https://www.britannica.com/topic/communism 1 2

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PERSPECTIVE DEVOTIONAL

PROCRASTINATION I

’m pretty good at procrastinating.

In fact, during my freshman year of college, I mastered this “skill” to levels that I didn’t even know existed.

I used to procrastinate on everything.

I procrastinated on writing a compare and contrast paper on “The American Childhood” by Annie Dillard and “The Fire Next Time” by James Baldwin.

I studied for a calculus exam the night before, trying to distinguish the difference between the Washer Method and the Disk Method… It was terrible.

The outcome was terrible. Sound somewhat relatable?

I know I’m not the only one who has been through this tragedy. It’s a “skill” I am definitely not proud of harboring and one that I would not want to have for the rest of my life. Upon much pondering of how much this habit of mine has affected my life, I have, sadly, noticed that this habit not only has taken control of my academic life, but it has also stolen my relationship with Jesus. As I wile away my morning hours, scrambling to finish an assignment an hour before my lecture, I push aside quality time I could have spent with Jesus.

The deadline of His second coming approaches soon. And here I am, procrastinating on developing my walk with Jesus. To be completely honest, this thought scares me. I can’t simply procrastinate on knowing who Jesus is.

Sparknotes doesn’t have a crash course on knowing Jesus. I cannot simply read a flimsy Wikipedia article on the history and the life of Jesus and say to Him on Judgement Day, “I know You, Jesus! Let me into heaven!” It simply does not work this way.

My test of knowing Jesus and reflecting His character is a single impending test on that distant day in the future when the angels of heaven sound the trumpet and Jesus descends in all of His majesty. My walk with Jesus is tested daily. My daily “quiz” of being a faithful Christian is examined through my present actions: Will I be kind to someone who gets on my nerves? Will I return a pencil I said I would borrow for a couple of minutes? Will I openly offer a prayer with my troubled friend even though it feels awkward and uncool?

I have ignored these responsibilities, simply because I have convinced myself that I still have tomorrow to do what Jesus wants me to do. “I’ll do it when I’m finally done with school and become a medical missionary in Majuro...” or so I think. I don’t know when my last hour will come, and when it does come, I can’t simply try to cram in enough “Jesus hours” to satisfy the requirements of getting into heaven.

I’m going to have to spend quality time with Jesus everyday. Even if I clock in five minutes praying and reading the Bible every morning, it will be a good start. I’m not saying that solely reading the Bible and praying will get someone a ticket to heaven. There will be those who have done these things, and God will still say that He never knew them.1 I have learned that spending time with Jesus is more like spending time with a great friend who listens to all of your gibberish and yet, still cares about everything you have to say. I’m pretty accustomed to doing all of my work at the last minute and God has been warning me that I’ve been procrastinating on knowing Him. It’s time that I step up my game and stop procrastinating on my ultimate task— exploring more about my friend Jesus.

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Matthew 7:23 (KJV )

JOBS

Christina Moran Devotional Writer

@ASWWU

Looking to make some moola? Check out these job opportunities and fill out the ASWWU application online!

- Web Designer for ASWWU Web - Sports Writer for Collegian - Mt. Ash Copy Editor - Mt. Ash Layout Designer

DRESS CODE? PATRIOTIC. ELECTION RESULTS PARTY 6–9 PM ON TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 8 STUDENT ASSOCIATION CENTER HOSTED BY AMNESTY, SOCIAL WORK, AND HISTORY CLUB

OPINION PERSPECTIVE

ADDICTED TO ESCAPE YVANNA HAMMEN-ALVAREZ Opinion Writer

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his past weekend was the famed Family Weekend here at Walla Walla University. If you went to University Church on Sabbath, you most likely heard Paddy McCoy’s sermon, (unless you were distracted by the ever-popular iPhone or Samsung Galaxy). The question for the themed #askanything sermon was “Why aspire to the pearly gates and harps when we can ‘Netflix and chill?’”

There were many thought-provoking points from Pastor McCoy, but the one that stood out the most was the concept of escaping reality. One thing that every person can be accused of is that we’re trying to escape reality in some way. Because, really, who wants to be surrounded with the negativity and violence that corrupts our world today?

Clearly, we don’t have a choice in what surrounds us, but we do have a choice in how we deal with it.

Some deal with it by strengthening their faith and increasing God’s presence in their lives. However, most deal with it through distractions. To be distracted leads to ignorance and ignorance leads to bliss… for the moment. Do not for a minute think that this bliss is eternal. Nevertheless, we blindly look for an escape. These distractions are not unknown to us: movies, TV shows, music, the newest model of the iPhone, Netflix, YouTube, Facebook, Yik Yak, Twitter, Snapchat, Instagram, etc. The list goes on and on!

Like Paddy said, although these are not inherently evil things, they are distracting us from the ultimate goal: heaven. The sole thing that should be #goals is our desire to get to heaven and be with God. I don’t think we realize how huge that is: being with God. Can anything be better than that? Is that

15-episode binge better than being with God? We need to ask ourselves this question on a daily, hourly, and momentto-moment basis.

Again, technology and other distractions are not inherently evil: but the devil uses them to draw us away from reality—from the ultimate reality. It’s as if this world has forgotten that the devil actually exists. Something bad happens: violence, crime, war, pestilence, fallen governments, rape, injustice, death… and what does the world say?

“Why did God do that?”

How dare we? How dare we even suggest that God, who loves everyone and died for every person that has ever walked the earth; who created each person, from Mother Theresa to Adolf Hitler, with His very hands in hope they would follow His loving pathways would inflict pain and suffering on us? We forget that the devil exists and he is working.

Let’s stop getting distracted on what the devil wants us to focus on. God

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@Jeff Gould

has a way better, way bigger plan for our lives that shouldn’t be wasted on the 26th episode in a row of House of Cards.

Rather, let’s focus on the home God’s planning for us.

And that, my friends, is better than a binge.

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“FEEDING?” “THE HOMELESS?” “FEEDING” joshua huh Opinion Writer

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rowing up in a comfortable, suburban, Adventist environment for the majority of my upbringing, I had always been taught—albeit not explicitly—that homeless persons were delinquent, misfortunate people by their own fault, cast to the lowest classes of society for their lifetimes of poor choices.

Having had no real interaction with any homeless individuals, or “the homeless” as they were called, I accepted and believed my circles’ unfair assertions about

homelessness. When I would participate in food drives or volunteer at a shelter for homeless persons with my school or church communities, I felt an air of distance between these individuals and myself.

In recent years, I have found myself on numerous occasions having lengthy conversations with homeless individuals.

Many of these persons have physical and mental health problems. Many have no families or loved ones to support them. Most seem to live in inescapable economic conditions. I think often of my friend Stan, who is homeless—his wife and children left him over seven years ago; his legs don’t work, leaving him to walk on crutches; his speech is slurred, presumably from brain injury; he deals with issues of depression and heavy alcoholism, for which he cannot receive help because of his situation. Despite all his problems,1

I cannot view Stan as anything less than a real human being dealing with his own unique real issues.

Since coming to Walla Walla University, I have heard of several opportunities on campus to “feed the homeless.” This phrase, to “feed the homeless,” is deeply problematic. Its wording implies a thought that is both impersonal and condescending to homeless individuals—that one is “feeding” another in the same way that she or he might feed a pet animal, incapable of finding food for itself; that “the homeless” are an arbitrary group of non-individuals, referred to much in the same way that a bigoted person might refer to gay persons as “the gays.” While the action behind the phrase may be wellintentioned and innocent, the language of the phrase itself perpetuates a culture that separates itself from homeless persons by disregarding them as individuals—as real human beings.

In my many interactions with Stan, there have been a few times that I have shared food with him.

Though he rarely asks me for money, 2 he has often asked for food.3 Sometimes, Stan and I eat together—I do not “feed” him. I have learned that homeless individuals like Stan are seriously complicated and uniquely special, and I have changed my language to reflect that. Thinking about the power of words and the intricacies of phraseology, both explicit and implicit, I urge the reader to do the same.

1 2 3

And his terrible sense of humor, for that matter.

He tells me, “I don’t take money from my friends.” (or cigarettes, which also satiate hunger, apparently)

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PERSPECTIVE #THECOLLEGIAN

@tubbys__kitchen

@joshuahuhwhat

@wwudrama

@bananammmmmm

@kyalvord

@malulani94

@carrietheus

@techygrizz101

@amandadawn5

@sashajane

@paulglatts

@one.in.amelia

@borap3

@arvargasphoto

@thaciastirling

@natedob

#THECOLLEGIAN

IS BLOCK

CALLED vixie bailey Religion Writer

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was called to theology. When I first started college last fall, I was a social work major. I knew that I wanted to help people, but I thought that pastoral work was only for men, because I went to a highly conservative high school. Therefore, I was pursuing the next best thing in my mind. I quickly realized that I would not survive in social work because it meant helping people without using the most comprehensive resource I have: God. I know people that can successfully do that and they are amazing at it, but I could not. I felt a pull to theology, but again I denied it because I thought that my gender made it a sin to serve God in

RELIGION/ACA PERSPECTIVE

PEXELS

that capacity. So I went halfheartedly into religion with the hopes of becoming a high school teacher. I think that miffed God a bit, because He sent me to Alaska and made me a pastor for the summer. It was like He was telling me that this was where He wanted me, and if He had told me any louder, I would have gone deaf. I came back and now am a quarter into Greek and wondering what on earth God is doing, but I know that He will get me through this.

Now I want to ask an important question: When did you receive your call to ministry?

Don’t get me wrong: I am not saying that everyone is supposed to take theology or even religion. It’s a common misconception that the only people called to ministry are church leaders—this is a lie. Paul illustrates

the church as a body twice in the Bible.1 He says, “From [Christ] the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.”2 Let’s face it: a body wouldn’t work if it was made of just hands. Besides, that would look kind of strange. In the same way, not everyone in the church should be a pastor.

So I ask again, when did you receive your call to ministry? Have you always wanted to become a nurse? A graphic designer?

An engineer? Or maybe it’s just in the last couple weeks or months that you have felt you should become a marine biologist or a PE teacher. What makes you any less called to become an accountant than I am to be a pastor? Ministry is not just for church leaders. There are people that you will come

PICTURES W

STEPHANIE SEPTEMBRE

started grabbing at them, trying to identify an image of themselves or one of their children. I didn’t have photos of everyone present, so I promised them more. Over the course of the summer, I printed close to a hundred.

My favorite memory is of Abram. He’s a 10-year-old boy I met on my first trip. A

in contact with every day that may never meet a pastor or evangelist. There are lives that I can never touch that you will be influencing on a daily basis.

God is not limited in how He works.

No matter if you’re undecided for your second year or you’ve known what you were going to become since high school, you are surrounded by opportunities to serve here at Walla Walla University. So what is stopping you? You have been called; the only thing left is to act.

“There are different kinds of working, but in all of them and in everyone it is the same God at work.”3 1 Corinthians 12 & Ephesians 4, NIV Ephesians 4:16, NIV 3 1 Corinthians 12:6, NIV 1 2

PEXELS

stephanie septembre ACA/SM Contributor hen I traveled to Peru last Christmas break, one of my primary tasks was to conduct interviews with community members in the rural village of Japura, where Engineers Without Borders is currently working to install solar panels. At the end of my interviews, I would ask for a picture of my interviewee for publicity purposes.

Some of those photos went on to be used for EWB’s annual fundraising gala, and one photo was even featured in The Collegian.

However, besides the one or two who peeked at my camera screen after I’d taken a shot, none of my subjects had ever seen their own photo.

I returned to Peru over the summer, and almost as an afterthought, I figured it would be a good idea to print off those December photos and give them to the people in Japura. When I started leafing through the developed photos, I was suddenly surrounded by little children, fascinated with the images of their friends and family. Another minute or so, and I was surrounded by at least 10 adults, who upon realizing that I was giving the photos away,

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lot of the children in Japura were initially very shy, so his boldness and cheeky smile stood out. I had a lot of pictures of Abram’s family, which I hoped to deliver in person. I spotted him one morning, walking towards me, and he greeted me in perfect English. I spent the rest of the morning with him as he helped me deliver more photos. During that

time, he couldn’t stop staring at his own. I asked him, “Do you have any other pictures?” and he said, “No. Only these.”

It is twisted that on my computer I have hundreds of photos of people I don’t even know, and these people may not have a single photo of themselves. What’s more, many of the Western volunteers I met in Peru seemed completely oblivious to the fact. More than once, I saw volunteers grab the cutest children available (whether or not the children even consented) for a Facebook pic, afterwards making sure he or she looked good but not bothering to let the kids look.

My summer experience taught me a number of things about photography. One is to never flaunt my camera. As wonderful as it may be, it is a status symbol, a device many may never be able to afford. Second: I must always ask permission. Not everyone wants a photo, and that needs to be respected.

Finally, when someone does want a photo, it is a photo of them, so a printout (Polaroid anyone?) or even a peek at the screen is the very least anyone can do.

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PERSPECTIVE CREATIVE WRITING/COLUMN

NON-BORING NONFICTION mac ford Creative Writing Editor 1. “The Psychopath Test” by Jon Ronson An engaging pop-psych book that opens with an unsolvable puzzle passed along from neurologists and academics, Ronson’s “journey through the madness industry” exposes conspiracy theories, radical psychotherapy, and common issues with misdiagnosis surrounding the idea of the psychopath. It’s full of weird stories and fascinating people—the perfect conversation-starter book.

GOODREADS

COLUMN emily huso Columnist joni harris Columnist

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s your political system broken? Don’t despair. The good news is, with these five simple steps, you’ll be able to troubleshoot the problem easily. Your broken political system will be just like new in no time!

Step 1. Replace the batteries. If your political system is inactive, or only works within four-year intervals, then the solution may be as simple as replacing the batteries.

What an easy fix!

2. “This is the Story of a Happy Marriage”

by Ann Patchett Ann Patchett is one of my very favorite writers. Her collection of essays is thoughtful, funny, and warm. The subject matter ranges from her experiences in professional writing (great for aspiring writers), to the time she took the rigorous entrance exam for the LAPD Police Academy (with no intention of becoming a police officer), to her dog, Rose, to the week she spent in the luxurious, celebrity-filled Hotel Bel-Air for an article.

GOODREADS

Step 2. Look for signs of corruption. If your political system has been around for a while, it’s possible you’ve worn out your hardware. For example, using the same hard disk for more than two centuries can lead to all kinds of file corruption.

Step 3. Check for system updates. Make sure your hardware is up to date! Speaking of updates, do you have the latest OS? We recommend using democracy.2016 because it’s open source and gives the user more freedom to customize to their liking! You don’t have to worry about paying those huge corporations and special interest groups for additional features!

That’s right! It’s entirely possible that the only thing wrong with your political system is that it’s been around for so long.

3. “Yes Please” by Amy Poehler One of my favorite celebrity memoirs, Poehler writes about living and performing in Hollywood, moon-hunting with her sons, remembering the good and bad of her failed marriage, and finding more things to say “yes please” to. My favorite part was her beautiful chapter on her time in Haiti, especially the line when she describes the names of the people that she met: “I met girls with names like Jenica and Suzenie. When I said their names out loud it felt like I had jewels in my mouth.” Her writing is funny, smart, and highly entertaining.

GOODREADS

While the system’s design may have worked okay in the 18th century, things are different now, and your system needs to be up with the times.

We know it’s a pain adjusting to new things, but your political system won’t be functioning at its best if it’s not up to date.

Step 4. Check for other signs of damage.

Exposure to high levels of polarization can damage your political system. In some cases, it can even cause your political system to shut down. If you think this is why your political system is broken, you may have to restore your system or take it in for repairs.

What else could be causing your broken political system? Well, it’s possible you’ve got a malware or virus infection problem. Install AVG Antihacking so that you don’t have to

4. “The Still Point of the Turning World”

by Emily Rapp This one is heart-wrenching—Rapp struggles to find answers after her ninemonth-old baby, Ronan, is diagnosed with a terminal illness. She and her husband are “forced to re-evaluate everything they thought they knew about parenting. They would have to learn to live with their child in the moment; to find happiness in the midst of sorrow; to parent without a future.”1 The book is short, but intense, beautiful, and painful. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/15811585-thestill-point-of-the-turning-world

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GOODREADS

worry about those Russian horses sneaking in and pulling data from your private servers ;) Step 5. Wipe your drive and start fresh. In case the worst happens, you can always wipe your data drive with political revolutions and civil war! But if you do that we suggest you backup all your valuable information such as your photos, passwords, swiss bank accounts, 401K’s, and your life savings into a portable backup drive. You can restore them later whenever you want.

And that’s it! These five simple steps will make it easy to fix your broken political system. However, if you think your political system is beyond saving, there’s still hope!

Most stores offer full to partial refunds to dissatisfied customers—as long as you’ve still got your receipt!

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TRAVEL/COLLEGIAN WISDOM LIFE

LESSONS FROM RWANDA Darling su Culture Writer

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or those who don’t know Ivory Vogt, she is a senior international communications student and ASWWU’s Global Service director. ASWWU’s goal this year is to send 75 refugees from Rwanda to an Adventist boarding school. This means the project will have to raise $45,000, which will cover their tuition, books, food, and toiletries.

Before the school year started, Ivory and other ASWWU leaders spent two weeks in Rwanda to get an insight of the situation and hear stories from the refugees. In this week’s issue she shares the experience she had in Rwanda.

How did your experience in Rwanda have an impact on your spiritual life?

It made me realize that even without a lot of resources, and going through traumatic experiences, people still had hope and kept faith in God. All the refugee students expressed how much hope they had in God coming from a hard situation. Here, even though we might have much to be secure about, you can still lack faith. Having faith is

hard for me sometimes, but when I see people who have faith for such little things like their next meal, or whether they are going to see their family again, I realize I can have faith too. The overall impact was that I wanted to live life with meaning beyond myself.

Are there any cultural values you would to adopt from their culture?

Hospitality and generosity. Everywhere we went we were welcomed, and treated like we belonged to their family. Also, people praise one another for the good things they do.

When they ask for something, they know how to wait for right moment.

How did the language barrier affect the communication between yourself and the refugees?

You don’t necessarily have to connect with words to understand how people feel. The deepest connection we had was when we were singing when we were together, whether it was in English or not it brought a sense of unity. Even just a simple thing as a hug, could express a shared sense of humanity.

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WALLUP

Any funny moments?

Here it’s normal to have braces, but kids at refugee camps had never seen braces before so when I opened my mouth a crowd of kids started pointing and laughing yelling, “Vampire! Vampire!” #howdoyouexplainbracestorefugeekids.

Are you planning on going back?

I am! I’m planning on going back this summer because I want to see the refugees who will be sending to school through the ASWWU Global Service project this year, and I want to visit the friends that I made while being there.

Why do you think we should be engaged in helping people living across the world?

I consider my neighbor someone who lives across the world and who lives next to me.

The well-being of society rest on making sure that even the poorest are being taking care of. We can’t live for ourselves. Like me, my brothers and sisters in other parts of the world strive for a better future and a chance to help the community through by completing their education.

DARLING SU LEFT TO RIGHT: PAMRA, GENTILE, CINTHIA, IVORY

COLLEGIAN WISDOM Rapper behind song “Sell Drugz” is Accused of Selling Drugs Wasn’t titled “Sell Drugz Successfully” for a reason Thief Breaks into Car, Only Steals Kit Kat Bar Police give him a break Woman Passes Gas During Surgery; Causes Fire in Operating Room Adam Sandler has already purchased her life rights Brexit Drives up Cost of Tea by up to 10 Percent Europe: Making people angry about tea since 1773 Officer Gives Himself Citation for Running Red Light Obviously not CPPD

PEXELS

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LIFE HUMOR/SNAPCHAT

HIGHLIGHTS OF THE 2016 ELECTION MICAH HALL Satire Writer

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his is an unusual election in many respects. Clinton and Trump are the most unpopular major-party candidates in history.

This has left us with a lot of good election highlights. These highlights can be used as a quick recap, or as a way to decide who you should vote for.

Because of all the exciting things that have happened this election, this is not an exhaustive list. If you would like more information about the presidential election, you can find it on the internet.1

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Clinton announces her candidacy for president. 2 Trump announces his candidacy for president and also says Mexico is purposefully sending America rapists. 3 Other people also announce they are running for president Trump says McCain isn’t a war hero because he got captured. 4 Trump gives out Lindsey Graham’s cell phone number to the public. In response, Lindsey Graham breaks his

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cell phone with a blender, toaster oven, and a meat cleaver. 5 Deez Nuts becomes a presidential candidate. 6 Ted Cruz ate bacon off a machine gun. 7 Trump says Megan Kelly was unfair to him at the debate because she was menstruating. 8 Hillary Clinton tweets, “Describe your feelings on student loan debt in three emojis.” 9 In response to criticism of her emoji tweet, Clinton tweets “¯\_(ツ)_/¯” 10 Clinton says she loves Snapchat because “the messages disappear by themselves.” 11 Ben Carson said he believes the biblical Joseph built the pyramids to store grain. 12 Jeb Bush says, given the opportunity, he would go back in time and kill baby Hitler. 13 Trump got attacked by a bald eagle named Uncle Sam. 14 Trump says he could shoot someone on 5th Avenue and people would still vote for him. 15 Mike Huckabee made a terrible parody of “Hello” by Adele to get people to vote for him in Iowa. 16

SNAPCHAT

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Jeb Bush had to ask people to “Please clap” after a fundraiser speech.17 Donald Trump says Ted Cruz’s father was part of the conspiracy to assassinate JFK. 18 Paul Ryan endorses Trump. 19 Trump says Ted Cruz’s father was part of the conspiracy to assassinate JFK again even though no one believed him the first time. 20 Trump becomes the Republican nominee. 21 Clinton becomes the Democratic nominee. 22 Video surfaces where Trump brags about sexually assaulting women. 23 Paul Ryan still endorses Trump.

Trump says the election is rigged unless he wins. 24 The New York Times ran an article that found Trump has insulted 282 people, places, and things on Twitter while running for president. 25 Trump says most of the people he insulted deserved it. 26 On 01/20/17, Hillary Clinton becomes president.

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The internet is our gateway to the world http://tinyurl.com/wwuclinton 3 http://tinyurl.com/wwutrump 4 http://tinyurl.com/wwuwarhero 5 http://tinyurl.com/wwuphone 6 http://tinyurl.com/wwudeeznuts 7 http://tinyurl.com/baconmachinegun 8 http://tinyurl.com/wwupleasestop 9 http://tinyurl.com/wwuloans 10 http://tinyurl.com/wwuloans2 11 http://tinyurl.com/wwusnapchat 12 http://tinyurl.com/bencarsonisincorrect 13 http://tinyurl.com/wwubabyhitler 14 http://tinyurl.com/wwubaldeagle 15 http://tinyurl.com/wwu5thave 16 http://tinyurl.com/wwuhello 17 http://tinyurl.com/wwupleaseclap 18 http://tinyurl.com/wwucruz 19 http://tinyurl.com/wwuryan 20 http://tinyurl.com/wwucruz2 21 http://tinyurl.com/wwutrump2 22 http://tinyurl.com/wwuclinton2 23 http://tinyurl.com/wwutrumptape 24 http://tinyurl.com/wwurigged 25 http://tinyurl.com/wwutwitter 26 http://tinyurl.com/wwudeservedit 2

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FOOD LIFE

STRAIGHTFORWARD SOUP Mason Neil Food Writer

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very part of this recipe is testament to the fact that when I cook I am not detail-oriented—my ultimate goal in making a dish is usually achieving some feeling of success and not making the same thing each time. So with that in mind, here’s how to make a simple, flavorful soup that will keep you from dying of starvation.

oomph to the dish that otherwise might be missing. If veggies aren’t your mojo, you could substitute chicken or beef broth. Be creative and use day-old coffee. Do I care?

Once the stock is boiling, throw in the lentils and the bouillon cube. At this point set a timer for 45 minutes. Keep the mixture

at a low boil and chop all your veggies. After 10 minutes of boiling, add the carrots. After 10 more minutes have passed, add the onion, then the celery. This keeps each veggie from getting overcooked.

As the 45 minutes near an end, test the soup. Lentils are quirky little legumes

WHAT YOU NEED: • One 32-ounce box of vegetable stock • 1 ⅓ cup brown lentils • Bouillon cube • Half of a small onion • Carrots • Celery Approach your stove. Lay out all your ingredients real pretty-like. Just kidding. No one does this and those who do are likely trying to hide something. Pour the box of vegetable stock into a pot and bring to boil. Using stock helps add more flavor and

INA GARTEN? I DON’T KNOW HER.

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and I never quite know how much time to give them before they’re ready to shine. If it passes inspection, serve it up hot and invite a friend to come over and watch you eat it.

The beauty of a soup like this is that it easily lends itself to modification. Open the fridge and pull out the most offensive veggies—perfect fodder for a November soup. If you’re a die-hard vegetarian who really needs that weird TVP stuff in everything you touch, that could work too.

The most important part is to not spill it on yourself and have fun while making it.

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LIFE FASHION

LOOKS ON CAMPUS: SOFIA ANGELICA CHAN Fashion Writer

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elcome to “Looks on Campus”, where we explore Walla Walla University students’ unique style and fashion choices.

Today, we have Sofia Ladopoulos, a sophomore nursing major. I chose to interview Sofia because she always looks effortlessly put-together whenever I see her around campus.

Sofia’s outfit is all about mixing dreamy femininity with edgy-ness. If you prefer neutrals, it can sometimes be difficult to incorporate colorful statement pieces into your outfits, but Sofia’s long scarf adds the perfect pop of color.

If you’re in a rush and want to look put together, take a page from Sofia’s book and grab a leather jacket. It’s an easy way to tie

ASWWU PHOTO

together an outfit while adding some edge.

It might be hard to tell, but Sofia is wearing patterned black leggings. The subtle crisscross pattern gives her outfit an extra bit of detail while not going overboard.

Black booties are a staple in many wardrobes, but Sofia’s take it up a notch. The heels keep it classy, while the gold buckles add some glam to the look.

Who or what inspires your style?

My inner emotions.

How would you describe your sense of style?

Girly and dark. I tend to dress in cooler tones, and more on the glam side.

If you could raid anyone’s closet, who would it be and why?

Leighton Meester and Megan Fox, because they are both poised, and their clothes reflect their personalities.

Where are the items in your outfit from?

The scarf is from H&M. Why did you choose this particular outfit?

It has dark colors and some patterns that don’t clash with an accent item [the scarf ].

Where do you like to shop?

I like to shop at Nordstrom, H&M, and Abercrombie & Fitch.

What fashion advice would you give to other students looking to improve their style?

On Wednesdays, we wear pink.

POLYVORE

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CARTOON LIFE

HER0 ZER0 EMMANUEL PERRY Cartoonist

fear!!!

sewn-on getup?!

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LIFE SCIENCE

ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE FROM ART TO MEDICINE jordan brooks Science Writer

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he notion that pieces of consciousness, if not the whole thing, can be replicated into man-made objects is unsettling. Perhaps this is not only because we are conscious of our own limitations, but also because we do not fully understand human consciousness.

Artificial intelligence is colloquially defined as computing machines that utilize cuttingedge technology to “think” and solve problems that were previously only solvable by humans. While the field of AI was conceived with the idea for computational machines developed by Alan Turing, it was born at a convention held at Dartmouth College in 1956. Astonishingly, programmed computers began tackling “human only” tasks immediately, and by the mid-1960s computer limitations seemed absent. With some hubris, Herbert Simon, a leader in the AI community, stated, “machines will be capable, within 20 years, of doing any work a man can do.”

1. Film: And the Oscar Goes to … the Computer While the core idea of AI was being forged in the furnace of academia, its extremes were being explored in film. The relationship of AI to man is a common theme found in science fiction. In “2001: A Space Odyssey,” the infamous computer HAL seizes control of a spaceship resulting in the death of most of its crew. Similarly, in the recent film “Ex Machina,” an artificially intelligent robot outmaneuvers human counterparts and emerges victorious from the conflict. “The Matrix” is set in a dystopian future where the world is run by robots that harvest energy from humans. In their own way, each of these films is reflective of the discomfort that we as a society feel toward what is unknown about AI, the reality in which we exist, and the reality we are creating.

In June of 2016, Simon’s statement was put to the test when filmmaker Oscar Sharp and collaborator Ross Goodwin had an artificially intelligent program developed to write a science fiction short film. The program named itself Benjamin and was “trained” on the screenplays of classic science fiction films. For a film competition, the program created “Sunspring,” which was then interpreted and produced by Sharp and his team.1 “Sunspring” completely inverts the typical relationships of AI, humans, and film by making humans the machines through which the AIs work is fleshed out. From this perspective, “Sunspring” is the actualization of the fear that we have of robots seizing control over the most human of tasks. Of course, Sharp and his team were still in control throughout this whole process, and chose to be subservient to the screenplay created by Benjamin.

Interestingly, one of the main repeated lines/ thoughts expressed throughout the film is “I don’t know.” Written by a program trained on human-made films about AI, the core idea expressed in “Sunspring” is perhaps the core feeling we have about conscious, manmade objects—we don’t know. And perhaps this is the scariest idea of all.

2. Medicine: Tracking the Forgetful Alzheimer’s disease is a problem. Not only is it the sixth leading cause of death in the United States, but it is also a nationwide financial burden, as caregivers recorded $221 billion in unpaid care given.2 Alzheimer’s is both prevalent and devastating to individuals and economies, making it a top priority in medical research and new treatment developments. A particular area of difficulty in Alzheimer’s is its diagnosis.

Diagnosing Alzheimer’s is difficult in the early stages of its development. While cognitive impairment can be approximated based on blood flow throughout the brain, measured with magnetic resonance imaging, it is hard to distinguish between Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia.3 Recently, a method for improving the diagnosis of Alzheimer’s was published in “Radiology.”

Utilizing machine learning, an aspect of artificial intelligence that enables computers to independently learn while being exposed to new data, researchers have delegated the difficult task of distinguishing Alzheimer’s to the fine-tuned data analysis of computers.

The implementation of machine learning has caused the diagnosis of Alzheimer’s disease

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and its progress to increase in accuracy about 82 to 90 percent.3 The development of this technique represents a sliver of hope for the future.

The increase in diagnostic accuracy will have the benefit of earlier diagnoses and perhaps more effective preventative interventions.

In a perfect situation, this would translate to a decrease in people suffering from Alzheimer’s and a financial relief for a society no longer bound by the expenditure of treatment. However, these thoughts are simply wishful thinking. Using AI in the diagnosis of Alzheimer’s is a new technique which is under investigation. While this method may provide an excellent tool to measure Alzheimer’s, it seems prudent that an overly watchful eye be kept on utilizing computers to diagnose disease. It is my opinion that while machine learning may increase a computers capacity to learn and interpret new data, I do not feel confident in solely basing a diagnosis as serious and as complicated as Alzheimer’s on the output of a machine. However, the instillation of hope that comes with the accuracy of this technique is palpable.

From art to medicine, the use of computers has already permeated the infrastructure of our culture. The development of our machine backbone is being marked by daily strides to more effective computing, which is expressed in human-like computation, interpretation, and even expression. While there is fear when expanding into the unknown, there is also hope, and it seems necessary to emphasize both in order to ensure safe and productive growth.

1 https://thescene.com/watch/arstechnica/ sunspring-sci-fi-short-film?source=player_ scene_logo 2 http://www.alz.org/mglc/in_my_ community_60862.asp 3 “New artificial intelligence system can detect alzheimer’s disease early.” DNA Daily News & Analysis. 7 September 2016.

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LITTLE WOMEN LIFE

LITTLE WOMEN:

THE BROADWAY MUSICAL Abigail Wissink Assistant Editor

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aturday night is the debut performance of “Little Women: The Broadway Musical,” a collaboration between the music department and wwudrama. Performances are Nov. 5, 10, and 12 at 8 p.m. and Nov. 6 and 13 at 2 p.m. in Village Hall. The show is directed by David Crawford, with vocal direction by Dr. Christine Janis and musical direction by Dr. Kraig Scott. Cast members include drama minors and members of the select choir I Cantori.

Rehearsal for the show began during JumpStart week, and the cast and crew have been meeting five times per week to

prepare for the performance dates. The fall drama production typically premieres on the first weekend in December, but in order to work with the music department and avoid conflicting with the Christmas concert, the performance dates were moved a month earlier. Casting for “Little Women” took place at the end of last year, and the cast members received their scripts over the summer to begin learning their lines and their songs.

The musical will be accompanied by a professional orchestra. The conductor, Dr. Scott, sought out students and community members who could learn the music quickly, as the ensemble is only rehearsing together twice before the dress rehearsal.

Shows performed by wwudrama are

a part of the Kennedy Center American College Theater Festival. An adjudicator from the festival will be coming to watch a performance of “Little Women” to critique the show and nominate two actors for the Irene Ryan Scholarship Competition. The competition will take place during the festival in February.

“Little Women: The Broadway Musical” is the first mainstage musical production performed on the wwudrama stage since the performance of “My Fair Lady” in 2011.

Tickets can be purchased at drama. wallawalla.edu and at the theater an hour before each performance.

CAST OF “LITTLE WOMEN” Come see your friends in this show!

Lindsay Armstrong: Megv March Chelsea Bond: Jo March Johanna Chevrier: Amy March Micah Hall: Professor Bhaer Kristina Kosakova: Beth March Brandan Patchett: Laurie Sophia Rich: Aunt March Peter Thomson: Mr. Laurence Bryce Weber: Mr. Brooke Abigail Wissink: Marmee

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KANYE WEST CONTEXT

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Thanksgiving needs some Lovin’ lauren wahlen Backpage Writer

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hanksgiving1 is definitely the overlooked middle child of holidays. I feel pretty bad for it, tbh. I mean, think about it. Halloween is clearly the wild, dramatic baby of the family, always the life of the party. And Christmas definitely exudes oldest child vibes as it brings the whole fam together and reminds them that “peace on earth” should be everyone’s priority. And then there’s Thanksgiving, the happy child who’s always eating and is really into football. Everyone likes Thanksgiving of course, I mean who hates the kid who’s always offering you food? But still. We all know that Christmas always has to take the spotlight from Thanksgiving, and sometimes even Halloween. And we see the evidence everywhere: grocery stores, malls, people’s homes, even oh so beautiful Costco.

In society’s defense, it does get a little mundane when you’re only allowed to decorate with turkeys, pumpkins, and an assortment of leaves, but that is no excuse! Thanksgiving is a holiday. And it deserves its time in the spotlight. So for those of you who are already in the Christmas mood, slow. your. roll. I’m listing three main reasons why there should be no decking of halls until after Thanksgiving. On a rando side note, I never really thought “Deck The Halls” sounded very nice. It seems more like a threat tbh. Like, tell me you wouldn’t be scared if someone yelled out “AYO BETTER WATCH OUT OR IMA DECK YOUR HALLS!” Ok, moving on…

1. Music: Christmas music is bae. Well, besides “Santa Baby”...that song paints a somewhat disturbing visual that I don’t wanna imagine. But in general, Christmas music does always seem to make things better. Unless, of course, it’s played outside the month of December. I once heard my sister listening to “Jingle Bells”

in the middle of July and I was soooo tired of it by the time Christmas actually arrived. Which sucks, cuz who doesn’t like “Jingle Bells?” The Grinch. That’s who. My sister turned me into the grinch for a whole month. We need to savor the anticipation. Let’s just appreciate that Thanksgiving has exactly zero songs dedicated to it which means there will be no caroling after dinner; we are free to stuff our bodies with as much food as possible and slip into a coma on the couch.

2. Presents: Thanksgiving is like Christmas 2.0: same food but without the pressure to buy people stuff. While some people can’t enjoy themselves until they’ve bought all their Christmas presents in advance, I personally enjoy the thrill of running around in a panic two days before Christmas while trying to find literally anything my dad might vaguely enjoy. So this holiday season, I encourage you to wait till Thanksgiving vacation is over to buy presents. December 23 might be a stressful time to go shopping, but it’s

gotta beat getting trampled on Black Friday. Well, I wouldn’t know for certain, but it didn’t look like fun in The Lion King.

3. Decorations: Why set up your Christmas decorations now, when there’s still some life left in your pumpkins you carved for Halloween? True, ours are starting to mold, but that almost adds to the grunge aesthetic we were “totally going for.” I just rotated ‘em a little so no one will be able to see the triangle I carved (carving pumpkins is a lot harder than I originally anticipated, and a triangle seemed to be the easiest shape to accomplish). Also, please don’t put up mistletoe till like, December 24. Let us walk through doorways without the dread of being potentially kissed by distant relatives, for the love of God and all that is holy.

1 This article isn’t directed at Canadians. Your Thanksgiving is already over, so ya’ll are in the clear.

RANDO Q OF THE WEEK

VERBATIM

Which Disney character would make the best president?

“Harambe lives. I see him in the shadows.”

–Dr. Paul Dybdahl

“Percy the Pug from Pocahontas, because he has his eyes on the prize: food.”

–Caroline Theus “Snow White, because she could win over disaffected grumpy old white men who support Trump.”

–Zachary White

“Plant services is what you get at the corner of 9th and Poplar.”

–Dr. Bruce Toews “You don’t mess with the brainpower of T-Jeff and Big Frank.”

–Monty Buell, referencing Thomas Jefferson and Benjamin Franklin

“Pinocchio, because we would know for certain when he told a lie.”

–Natalie Wolske

Let me know if you hear faculty/staff say anything ridiculous or strange. Submit your quotes to lauren.wahlen@wallawalla.edu. Gracias :)

CONFESSIONS What’s the most embarrassing thing that happened to you or someone you know in junior high?

Let me know at lauren.wahlen@wallawalla.edu.

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