Volume 101 Issue 25

The Collegian Walla Walla University

Volume 101

Issue 25

18 MAY 2017

18 SIGNS THAT YOU ARE #ADULTING: COLLEGE EDITION PAGE 6

OPINION

COLUMN

PAGE 10

FASHION

PAGE 12

PAGE 14

DEAR READER, Thank you to the amazing Collegian staff for making It’s been a long journey, but thank you for riding this year a success. Without their hard work, The Collegian through the year with us. Over the past 25 issues, we have couldn’t have become what it is today. If you would like explored a variety of topics and stimulated some valuable to meet some of the staff and hang out with some really conversations. I will admit, I was planning on creating cool people while picking up your copy of our special issue, a stronger online presence this year but, unfortunately, I come to the CTC Black Box on Thursday, May 25, from was unable to do so. However, what we were able to do 6-8 p.m. There will be food and an ambient atmosphere is create a year where many different opinions were free to close off the year. Also, I encourage you to look out for to be expressed. Both conservatives and liberals were able the first issue of next year’s team, which will be coming out to see at least glimpses of their worldview throughout the in a few weeks! I think the next editor-in-chief, Daniella year. And in the end, that is really what matters—providing Silva, is going to do a fantastic job and contribute another a platform where every person feels safe to provide their successful year to the tradition of excellence that has opinions and views. I hope that all our issues throughout characterized 101 volumes of The Collegian. the year helped you in your journey through life whether I bid you adieu and I wish you the best! that be through providing some laughter in a busy day or May God be with you till we meet again. some food for thought to mull over.

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF MATTHEW MORAN

CONTEXT

Perspective

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10 Table of Contents | 02 News & Letters to Editor | 03 Week in Forecast | 05

editor-in-chief Matthew Moran assistant editor Abigail Wissink Creative Director Frank Ramirez Head Copy editor Sophia Rich

columnist Joni Harris

news writers Kyler Alvord Lauren Epperson

Fashion writer Angelica Chan

food writer Mason Neil feature editors Michael Jensen Ysabela Ramirez Bryndilynn Goodlyn

Life editor Micah Hall

humor writer Micah Hall

backpage editor Lauren Wahlen

opinion writer Yvanna Hammen-Alvarez

religion writer Vixie Bailey

PIXABAY

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Feature | 06 Devotional & Religion | 09 Opinion & Creative Writing | 10 Food & ACA/SM | 11 Column & Culture | 12

layout designers Anna-Marie Vargas Claudia Curtis Geoffrey Lopes Hannah Chebeleu

Copy Editors Katherine Beckner Amelia Pekar

LIFE

Devotional writer Christina Moran

MASON NEIL

Column & Culture | 12 Humor & Contributor | 13 Fashion & #thecollegian | 14 Science | 15 Sunny Side Up | 16

If you are interested in contributing to The Collegian, speak with one of our illustrious staff members. The Collegian is enhanced by regularly incorporating a wide range of campus perspectives.

Culture/travel writer Darling Su ACA/SM Editor Stephanie Septembre Science writer Jordan Brooks Creative writing editor Mac Ford global service writer Daniel Villarreal

Cover Credit: ASWWU The Collegian is the official publication of ASWWU. Its views and opinions are not necessarily the official stance of Walla Walla University or its administration, faculty, staff, or students. Questions, letters, and comments can be sent to aswwu. collegian@wallawalla.edu or matthew.moran@wallawalla.edu. This issue was completed at 11:11. on Wednesday, May 17, 2017.

Office Manager AnneMarie Vixie distributor Victoria Ico

The Collegian | Volume 101, Issue 25 | 204 S. College Avenue, College Place, WA 99324 https://issuu.com/aswwucollegian

NEWS & LETTER TO THE EDITOR CONTEXT 3

YEARBOOK PICKUP KYLER ALVORD NEWS WRITER

S

ummer is approaching fast, and one of the annual ASWWU traditions is to design yearbooks and deliver them to each Walla Walla University student during the final weeks of the school year.

Anna-Marie Vargas, ASWWU head of publications, will be handing out copies of the “Mountain Ash” with her team at the ASWWU Block Party on May 30 at 5 p.m.

The Block Party will be on College Avenue.

SENATE

Along with the yearbooks, the department will provide a sweet treat.

The “Mountain Ash,” often stylized as “Mt. Ash,” includes ASWWU photos from various events throughout the year and Mask photos for every student. The “Mountain Ash” staff honors the graduating class by giving them more space and special photos.

The 2016-2017 yearbook will be volume 103. WWU released the first yearbook, then called the “Western Collegian,” in May of 1915.

The retitled “Mountain Ash” is named after the mountain ash tree, a shrubby green tree with red-orange berries. The same species of tree supposedly inspired the WWU school colors.

This week, Senate had seven bills in old business and zero bills in new business.

NEW BUSINESS P.L. 40 – Jared Jamieson for Head of ASWWU Video P.L. 41 – William Johnson for Financial Vice President

SNAPSHOTS

P.L. 42 – Jonathan Fitch for Head of the ASWWU Atlas P.L. 43 – Ryan Rabello for Head of ASWWU Web P.L. 44 – Daniella Silva for Head of the ASWWU Collegian F.L. 15 – Atlas Renovation F.L. 16 – Public Bike Repair Station F.L. 17 – ASWWU Budget 2017-2018

ANDREW YAMADA

CALEB RISTON

ANDREW YAMADA

G.L. 22 – SoVP Campaign Event Plan G.L. 23 – Updated Job Descriptions G.L. 24 – ASWWU Wellness & Diversity Officer

OLD BUSINESS G.L. 19 – Disciplinary Procedure Rework CALEB RISTON

F.L. 13 – Camera Equipment for ASWWU Photo

ANDREW YAMADA

F.L. 14 – Vacuums for Conard and Foreman These bills passed.

ANDREW YAMADA

ANDREW YAMADA

ANDREW YAMADA

If you have any questions about these bills, contact your senator. More information will be available in your Senate update email!

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CONTEXT NEWS & LETTER TO EDITOR

A CLOSER LOOK AT THE MAN BEHIND THE MIC: DR. GEORGE YANCY ELTON NARCISS CONTRIBUTING WRITER Education is dangerous. True education ought to be dangerous to those who want to keep a society that marginalizes others for their own benefit. When people are educated, they can and should speak out against a system that is complacent with the oppression of the wellbeing of all humanity.

This was the essence of Dr. George Yancy’s presentation for the Inaugural Conference for the Donald Blake Center.

On Thursday, April 20, Yancy said, “I want white people to leave my talk discontented, meaning, in the words of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., ‘being in the state where you are unhappy about the circumstances in which you live.’” He wanted to give his audience a sense of urgency about the work that has to be done today, rather than tomorrow. Also, to be politically conscious of the weight of their own whiteness and what it means. It is fair to say that Yancy has made it his mission to teach students in such a way that they too can speak parrhesically and be known as parrhesiasties. When looking at Yancy’s presentation, it is not only a message for white people, however; it is a challenge for all races to go out and make a difference, by changing one’s government system if needed.

A collaboration for the human race, by the human race, under these banners: peace, unity, and love. It is a job that must be completed by both the oppressor and the oppressed.

INTENTS LAUREN EPPERSON NEWS WRITER

Walla Walla University enjoyed InTents, a week of prayer organized by the Theology department, from May 8 to 13.

Eleven speakers shared their experiences and walks with God. Students and professors alike made themselves vulnerable and shared their stories of Jesus’ love. Students gathered in a tent on Kretchmar lawn and praised God together.

Yancy, professor of philosophy at Emory University, was born in North Philadelphia.

Yancy grew up in poverty as a project kid, and this shaped the way how he saw life in America. He came from a place which James Baldwin describes as “a place designed to produce mediocrity.” Later, when Yancy enrolled in New York University, he chose to study race. Today, scholars and philosophers regard him as an expert in those fields.

Yancy challenged Walla Walla University to think critically on race, racism, and racial embodiment.

When it comes to discussing issues regarding race and racism within contexts like this one, we mustn’t be like Odysseus who dared to be adventurous and yet remained safe.

When sensitive and intimate topics regarding race and how it is lived and experienced comes up, we must not avoid it. Rather, we must engage in what Yancy calls “the aleatoric.”

The aleatoric is the unpredictable space of openness that can fracture a calcified norm and unproductive practices. We must be open to the idea of being vulnerable, a position which is most feared, because it ushers in a state of uncertainty, and it opens us up to the unknown. It opens us up to the ignored, to the oppressed, to a shame, and a guilt of a bad past, a past this generation did not take part in, but still does not acknowledge regarding its effects on our society.

Whiteness is structurally binary. When looking at its structure, it presupposes the other, and, in this case, the extreme other is “the blacks.” Called the Manichaean Racial

Divide, this theory, Yancy said, could be best explained through Star Wars. Darth Vader represents the dark side, versus when you look at Luke (which means light) Skywalker, who represent the good side. There’s the light side and then there is the dark side of the force. Good versus evil. Yancy supported his argument by paragonrosine, saying, “The black-white binary is probably the paradigm of racism in America. Blackness at one end, and whiteness at the other end.” Yancy goes on to say whites created this binary; for whiteness to exist, it needs the other to sustain itself. He continues to say he sees this binary in America today. It was there from and the founding of this country during.

Will we ever reach the point where we have overcome racism in America or the world? Maybe not in the near future; however, there is a lot that needs to get done today that cannot wait for tomorrow. Yancy talked extensively on the way the church interacts with minorities from all backgrounds which includes LBGTQ+ people and women. “If you called yourselves ‘Christians’ why haven’t you done anything to improve race relations yourselves?” Yancy says. He goes on to say that we fail as Christians because we fail to talk about the issues that affect our brothers and sisters in the church. Essentially, we fail to love, which is the whole essence and subject of Christianity. He went on to say that if we truly love one another we will not be comfortable in our current state; instead, we would want our brothers and sisters who are marginalized to benefit from the same

privileges as white Christians do. Yancy went on to quote Baldwin by saying, “Love takes off the masks that we fear we cannot live without and know we cannot live within.” The church needs to talk about these sensitive issues if it wants to move forward progressively.

A lot can be said about Yancy’s presentation, but the truth is, he met all his obligations and objectives. He’s stirred the thoughts and minds of Walla Walla University to think critically and more seriously on race and ethnic cultures in America. He also made us think seriously of the sacrifice women go through daily for the male to enjoy his way of life. Dr. Timothy Golden, chairman of the Donald Blake Center of race, ethnicity, and culture, stated, “I chose George Yancy to be our keynote speaker at our Inaugural Conference because a lot of the things he had to say are still relevant in today’s America.” I must say, we kicked things off with a bang, and I look forward to next year’s conference when the subject matter will be oppression of Native Americans.

It is the mission of the Donald Blake Center to encourage students to be proactive with their research, particularly with subjects that relate to the study of race, history, and culture, and to open their perspectives and help them become well-rounded scholars.

The praise team, headed by Cameron Fitzgerald, led everyone in praise songs and set the mood for a great service.

CommUnity credit and worship credit were offered for people that attended. Snacks and refreshments were served after each service, sponsored by various clubs and groups.

Corbin Clark, junior bioengineering major, said, “My favorite part was that we came together and met outdoors.”

Mareliza Dejesus, senior business major, said, “I enjoyed Pedrito’s energy every night.

It was great!”

Students enjoyed the wide variety of speakers and topics that were shared. Despite the cold, windy weather, InTents was still a success and people from all over campus came together to worship God.

WEEK IN FORECAST FRIDAY

THURSDAY

SATURDAY

PIXABAY

TIMMY TORRES

may 18

may 19

may 20

After Hour 7-9 p.m. SAC

Agape Feast 6:30 p.m. Kretschmar lawn

WWUDRAMA Spring Show 8 p.m. Village Hall

Dedication Vespers & SM Reception 8 p.m. University Church

ReNew Church in the Mountains 9:45 a.m. Alumni Center parking lot Outdoor Church 11:45 Centennial Green Spring Choral Concert 5 p.m. University Church Sonnenberg Dorm vs. Village Basketball Games 9 p.m. WEC

SUNDAY

TUESDAY

MONDAY

THE MARCUS WHITMAN

GOOGLE MAPS

DAVID HARRIS

may 21

May 22

may 23

WWUDRAMA Spring Show 2 p.m. Village Hall

Erin Jones: “Understanding My Why” 4-7 p.m. WEC 209

Year-in-Review CommUnity 11 a.m. University Church

ASWWU Spring Banquet 6:30-10 p.m. Marcus Whitman Hotel

Outdoor Open Mic & Affogatos 7-9 p.m. The Atlas

Loma Linda U: School of Dentistry Info Session & Interviews 6 p.m. KRH 210

Coming up

Collegian Special Issue Release Party May 25

Block Party May 30

6 PERSPECTIVE FEATURE

18 SIGNS THAT YOU ARE #ADULTING: COLLEGE EDITION BRYNDILYNN GOODLYN FEATURE EDITOR

MATTHEW MORAN CONTRIBUTING WRITER

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s a child, oftentimes all you wanted was to be an adult. It was going to be so great: You would have no bedtime, you could buy anything you wanted, and you didn’t have to eat lentil soup if you didn’t want to.

Then you became a teenager and it seemed even greater: No one would tell you what to do, you wouldn’t have a curfew, and you could have pizza for every meal. Now you’re in college and you are finally an adult: You do your own laundry, you cook for yourself, and you grocery shop all on your own.

And when you see the U-Days kids you really feel grown up. But then you realize that you’re graduating in three weeks and the terror sets in because you have no idea how people actually adult all on their own.1 For our last Collegian issue, we have decided to help you feel like a more functional adult by pointing out some of the more adultier things that you might do. #adulting. So here are 18 things that show you how far you’ve come.2 You know you’re an adult when...

PERSPECTIVE FEATURE

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You realize you can go to the store at any time and buy a donut just because you want to-but then you don’t because it costs money and isn’t healthy for you. Childhood myth dispelled.

You realize the full value of Sabbath rest.You now understand why your parents wanted to take an afternoon nap because you do it too.

Sabbath naps are the best because you don’t have to feel bad about not doing homework.

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You can file your own tax returns without your parents’ help.3 If you can file your own taxes too, you are even more adult-like. Kudos to whomever this applies too. Please teach me.

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You voluntarily go to bed early because sleep is more important than Modern Family. This also applies to naps. I always feel a bit of disbelief at my childhood self that hated taking naps and looked forward to the day when I no longer had to have them. Sleep is life.

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You realize that you have to get good grades for your own sake and not for your parents.

This also makes it so much more motivational.

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You realize that other people’s opinions don’t have to define you. Although it’s good to be able to take constructive criticism and ask for advice from those you trust, letting other people define who you are and what you do is unhealthy. As an adult, it’s up to you now to decide who you are going to be and who you will let influence you. As a friend of mine once said, if high school is about finding yourself, college is about defining yourself.

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You realize that life is not all about you. Up to this point, life has been pretty focused on you, if you think about it. This is especially true in college. But a sign that you are really an adult is the ability to balance your self-care with your care for others.

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You start wearing makeup only when it’s #worthit because that time could be spent sleeping. Also, makeup is expensive and you are careful with your money now.

You really learn to appreciate your parents, because although they aren’t perfect, they’re doing their best to help you figure out this #adulting thing. And honestly, they’re probably still learning as well.

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8 PERSPECTIVE FEATURE

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You learn how to do your own laundry.

Although some students might only do laundry once a month (you know who you are), you realize that you can’t live life in a heap of dirty clothes for too long. The smell test might get you by for a couple weeks but, before long, you are going to have to do your own laundry.

You realize that dangerous, "fun" activities are not worth it. High school was a time to do all sorts of crazy things. You began college probably going all out but, as you grow up, you realize it’s really not fun and not worth it.

You are still able to have fun but in a better, safer context...like coloring in a blanket fort.

Or watching "Veggie Tales" with friends.

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You learn how to budget time. It has previously been said that a college student must pick only two of the following three life necessities: sleep, academics, or friends.

Unfortunately, this choice only gets harder as you learn how to be an adult. There seems to never be enough time in the day to get stuff done so you learn how to budget your time even to the minutest minute.

You realize that you need to be healthy. It was easy to exercise in high school because of sports and various other activities. Eating junk food never made you feel bad and you could probably eat Taco Bell every day without looking any different. However, as you get older, you start to see the effects of the Taco Bell on your body especially as you exercise less and less. You realize you have to be even more health conscious than you ever had to be before.

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You start reading the news. You might not have cared much about the world outside your small friend group and school but, as you grow up, you realize that you care about the world you are growing up in. You want to stay connected with the latest government politics or world events. You finally understand why your parents are always reading The New York Times, The Orange County Register, or (obviously) The Collegian.

You start sounding like your parents. You start to say things like “I remember when I was young” or “back in my day.” You realize what you are saying and try to stop yourself, but it’s too late. Frankly, you don’t really care that people know how old you are.

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You look at old photos of yourself and are astonished by your childish style. Did you really wear that purple hoodie everywhere? Did you even know how to dress nicely for jobs?

You establish your moral framework. You might never arrive at a definite conclusion, but you know you are an adult when you begin to define a framework for your life and sense of being. You become even more open-minded and willing to explore different things.

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This is me.

Get it? Because 18 is the legal age of adulthood in America…

3 #Istillhavenoideahowtodothis 1

You realize you don’t want to grow up.

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RELIGION & DEVOTIONAL PERSPECTIVE 9

PRESS ON VIXIE BAILEY RELIGION WRITER

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his is it. My phone tells me that I have 24 days until my flight leaves for Alaska.

My syllabi tell me that all my projects that I haven’t really started on are due. My grades remind me that I really need to start those projects very soon. But my mind, my heart, my body, they are already done. They are ready for Alaska, for classes to be done, for summer to be here. But it’s not.

Waiting is the worst part of life, and the first century Christians had their fair share.

Dealing with Jesus' death, waiting for the Holy Spirit to come, spreading the gospel,

and waiting. Waiting for Jesus to come back.

It’s no secret it didn’t happen, yet every generation people have proclaimed Christ’s soon return. It’s become like the story of the boy who cried wolf. He said there was a wolf so many times just to mess with the villagers, and when the wolf actually came, they didn’t help him. We’ve said and heard so many times “Jesus is coming soon” that we don’t actually believe that He’s coming.

I was talking to one of my friends recently and the topic of heaven came up.

We talked like you do when you’re in grade school; what animals we would own, what house we’d live in. But at the end, we both came to the same conclusion. First thing, we wanted to hug Jesus. When I see people that

are protectors of our nation and freedom, I want to hug them, and all the more I want to hug Jesus who has given me freedom to live without fear, to plan for heaven and the reuniting of loved ones, to have the childish dreams of finally overcoming my fears and touching a snake. I know Jesus, and I know He’s coming. I don’t know when, but I am determined to not let it become something I just say. I want it to be something I look forward to.

I recently had a close friend that I have been separated from tell me that because of the connection between us, they were actively trying to come back, to be united, even for a little while. That is the same thing that should be happening in our hearts and

minds. Jesus is actively coming for us, and we should continually be moving towards Him. Don’t let the phrase “Jesus is coming soon” ring hollow in our ears. Work towards Jesus, because He is working towards you.

Join the apostle Paul in saying, “Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.”1 Press on, my friends. Through projects, finals, summer jobs, graduating; wherever life takes you, keep your eyes on the prize and remember this: Faith is believing that no matter what lies ahead, God is already there.

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Philippians 3:12

CHILD-ING VS. ADULT-ING Then Jesus called a little child to Him, set him in the midst of them, and said, ‘Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Whoever receives one little child like this in My name receives Me.’” 1 CHRISTINA MORAN DEVOTIONAL WRITER

A

mong Jesus’ 12 chosen disciples, there was competition. They wondered, “Who then is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?”2 Instead of pointing out to one of them, I imagine that Jesus propped a child to sit on his lap, and as the other happy children gathered around Jesus, He says to his disciples, “Unless you are converted and

become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven.”3 Does Jesus suggest that we to act like children who are spoiled and ignorant, still learning how to be polite to others and how to be an individual? No. In the next verse, Jesus clarifies what He means by being “little children,” He says, “‘Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”4 It is the humility of the child that Jesus yearns for us to have. Humility allows one to be

recognize they are doing something wrong and allows them to be open for teaching and chastening. And through trusting and obeying the word of God, we become more and more a reflection of his perfect, holy, and loving character.

It is easy to lose this child-like humility when, especially as college students, we are constantly trying to adult (the verb form of the noun, adult, in which an individual learns how to take on the responsibilities of an adult). We lose sight of the adult God

wants us to become, and forget that we are not our own, but we are Christ’s, if we have chosen to follow Him. Even when we are adulting, growing into men and women and learning how to benefit ourselves and society, we are not to let go of being like a humble child, ready to recognize our faults and improve ourselves through the teachings of God. God prompts us to grow into men and women, but also does not want us to forget to be humble and teachable, like little children.

Pray: Dear God, You are a wonderful, awesome God, constantly in care of me. You are so loving and forgiving. Thank You for teaching me Your ways. I pray that you will instill in me the humility and teachableness as a little child. I pray that You will open my eyes to the sin I have done and You will help me turn away from evil, and with a strong trust in You, as a child trusts his mother, help me to lean on Your strength, as I continue to grow in You. In Your precious name I pray, Amen.

10 PERSPECTIVE OPINION & CREATIVE WRITING

THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT YVANNA HAMMEN-ÁLVAREZ OPINION WRITER

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dward Lorenz coined the term “the Butterfly Effect,” originating from a myth about a tornado that started due to a butterfly’s flapping wings. The idea is that small actions can prompt large results. There’s something about this effect that seems impossible, yet it fascinates me because I realize that it happens often. Throughout our daily lives, we tend to focus on our difficulties, homework, and personal struggles. It’s sometimes hard to realize that others are going through the same and, believe it or not, way more difficult things than we are.

I was shown a video of a man who wanted to implement kind actions in his life, so he went around asking people what he could do for them. Many people rejected his help due to fear of him having an ulterior motive. Eventually, some people let him help them. A lady in the video told him he was being altruistic, or focusing on others’ needs before his own. The things this man did were things that most people wouldn’t expect to

PEXELS

be appreciated, like holding an umbrella for someone or carrying someone’s groceries.

As I watched the video I wondered why I don’t do these things as much as I could. I guess I struggle with the same thing as everyone else, which is focusing on others’ needs instead of focusing on my own. Imagine how much good could be done from giving a simple smile and hello or opening the door for somebody.

I think part of being altruistic is focusing on what I would want someone to do for me

if I were in someone else’s situation. I know it sounds like a selfish way to go about it, but it's attached to the golden rule and it makes sense. I need to want to treat others the way I would want to be treated. The hard part is treating others in that way, even if it’s not reciprocated. But back to the point at hand: if someone is going through a tragic loss or even just a difficult homework assignment, why not go out of one’s way and ask them if they’d like to talk sometime or if one can help them with

their homework? Not only will that help them in their situation, but it would also allow one to realize purpose in life and how to make one’s corner of the world the best one possible.

The ultimate example of this altruistic attitude is Jesus Christ. Every action and every word reflected the selfless mindset He had and wants us to have now. Not all of His actions were appreciated by everyone, but that didn’t stop Him. He just went out of His way to do good deeds to help others, not to get glory and honor from it.

Dear reader, as you go from class to class, chill at The Atlas, or study in the library, notice the people around you. Sure, it may be difficult to realize if someone needs something, but I challenge you to go up to a person and ask them if there’s anything they need help with or if there's something nice you could do for them.

It sounds uncomfortable sure, but usually the best things in life come from breaking down walls and being proactive. I would love to hear about how this challenge goes, so you can email me at Yvanna.Hammen-Álvarez@ wallawalla.edu. Happy Butterfly-Effecting!

CREATIVE WRITING MAC FORD CREATIVE WRITING

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o wrap up the 2016-2017 Creative Writing Section, here’s an excerpt of a short fiction piece I wrote this year. I’ve really enjoyed sharing some of my favorite writers around campus, good books, and writing advice with you all. Thanks for reading and have an amazing end of the school year!

When I was eight, a swan broke my father’s back. I remember the white swell, wild chop of wings, the thrumming of heartbeats and hot blood. The snap, and prickle of hairs down my arms.

They all showed up in the span of a day: the lakes and ponds in Lower Township were overrun that year with mute swans, serene and antisocial, sailing wing to wing in

a mass glide. When provoked, they grunted and hissed and whistled hoarsely to the cygnets.

They filled our neighbor’s cranberry bog and attacked the dogs when they came too close. The nails on the swan’s toes left scratches across muzzles, and there were several reports of legs snapped by black beaks.

People were nervous. We avoided the ponds on the way to school and lakes were roped off, circled with caution tape. Life was re-routed. At night, some swore they could hear a hundreds of wings throbbing, rustling, shifting.

The police talked about population control. Maryland did it last year, they said. Over a thousand swans shot and their eggs crushed. “They’re not a native species,” Police Chief Stettler said. “They’re killing off the local tundra swans.”

“It’s all posture,” Jean Stein, gym teacher at Township Elementary claimed.

“Stand your ground, swan walks away.”

“I think they’re beautiful,” Carol Clark said. “I don’t like this talk of killing them.

Look at them all, so lovely out there.”

In the winter, the swans left the icedover lakes to hide in the nearby forest, rendering more land claimed. No one saw much of the birds, except when one or two came out to poke at the ice, pull out some dark, streaming vegetation, then strut back into the tree cover.

In January, a swan ventured into Alice Feldman’s yard, where she and her three brothers were building walls with ice-crust for a snowball fight. The high sun tinted snow and swan the same pastel-edged white, a dazzling eggshell. The children didn’t see the swan until it stood mere feet away.

Bradley, the oldest, cried out when he saw the black feet, and pushed the others into the fort. They built and packed up the walls desperately as the beak tore through

ice and dirty snow. The bony spurs in its great white wings beat the walls like long white fingers. Alice was crying, scooping desperately at the packed snow of the fort floor. She had taken off a mitten to sculpt the delicate facial features of a snowman who guarded the north wall, and now her fingernails cracked against the ice. She heard the swan hiss from outside.

Her father heard the screams and ran outside with his shotgun and terrycloth robe. The swan was moving so fast, made blinding by the sun, and the children were only covered with snow—he was trembling from the cold, could barely aim—but he finally clipped its neck and watched the swan sprawl S-shaped in the snow, blood mottling and melting the base of the fort.

Hysteria rose after this incident (as expected).

FOOD & ACA/SM PERSPECTIVE 11

LESSONS TO BE LEARNED FROM THE HAYSTACK

MASON NEIL FOOD COLUM-MMM, DELICIOUS!

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any Adventists would agree that the most stereotypical Seventh-day Adventist food is the haystack, which roughly resembles a taco salad but has many different interpretations. In my family, a haystack consisted of a base layer of corn chips (Fritos), chili (made vegetarian, because the good Lord told us to), cheese sprinkled on top, various chopped veggies (onions, tomatoes, olives, peppers, lettuce, avocado, etc.), salsa, sour cream, and guacamole. Though each person makes their haystack differently, there are a few important things that can be learned from this humble dish.

1. Be Inclusive The Adventist church recently took a major step backward when it approved a statement on “trangenderism” that ignores the experiences of trans individuals and disregards their needs in favor of “biblical principles” on gender.1 Unfortunately, the statement continued an already long history of LGBT alienation from the SDA church.

The haystack, on the other hand, is an inclusive endeavor. There is no set recipe or method to creating the haystack, and it is designed to include a whole array of ingredients. When the ingredients are mixed together, they create a food dish that is even more delicious than if you only enjoyed each ingredient on its own. Excluding an ingredient from the haystack, or excluding a demographic from the church, will

only weaken your entrée and make your congregation increasingly bland.

2. Be Adaptable Seventh-day Adventism is a global religion, and appropriately the haystack is a global food. It can easily be adapted to whatever foods are more common in a region.

While chips and beans may be more popular in the U.S., other regions may opt for a riceand beans-based combination. The analogy is simple: the haystack adapts to whatever is available and accessible. The recent rules created by the General Conference of Seventh-day Adventists that limit women’s ordination and LGBT church membership shows an intense interest on the part of a small group of individuals in controlling the lives of a much larger group of people. While the General Conference says “abide by our

rules and we’ll let you in,” the haystack says “show me what you got and we’ll make the best of it.”

It’s a simple metaphor that may seem funny, but the principles should not be hastily ignored. The SDA church has the opportunity of deciding whether it is going to be an organization of inclusivity and support or of exclusivity and degradation.

Unfortunately, it appears church leadership is currently more interested in shutting doors than opening them.

https://news.adventist.org/en/all-news/news/go/201704-11/seventh-day-adventist-world-church-vote-statement-on-transgender/

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THE WANDERLUST GENE STEPHANIE SEPTEMBRE ACA/SM WRITER

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ver heard of DRD4-7R? It’s called the wanderlust gene. Those with this gene are supposed to exhibit higher levels of curiosity and restlessness. When I first heard about it,1 I thought, “That’s me. I have that gene.”

Since my first intercontinental experience to Belize, I’ve been hooked. I’ve lived in four countries, travelled to 18, and I hope to reach 25 by the time I reach 25. I don’t know how to express it, but I can’t stay in one place for too long. There’s too much to see. So I figured if anyone has this gene, I do.

Then I read an article2 essentially debunking this whole “it’s genetics—you can’t help it” theory. It didn’t deny the power of genetics or even the possibility that those who have the DRD4 gene are more prone to travel, but it reaffirmed what any good scientist would tell you: Genes are only half the story. They can push you one way or the other, but your experiences have a lot to do with it too.

As ACA/SM editor for the past two years, I’ve had the immense pleasure of

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learning about people’s experiences. Some were overtly positive, and others were tainted by disappointment. I can relate to both sentiments: My experience in France two years ago was horrible, but my summer as an SM in Peru was probably the best three months of my life. I think if I hadn’t had such positive experiences traveling before France, I might not have wanted to travel again.

I get there are some people who will never like travelling, but I think almost everyone— DRD4-7R or not—would be willing to give

travelling a shot, and most would probably travel again if the experience was positive.

One theme that ran across all my interviews and submissions was how much being abroad changed students’ perspectives of the world. If only for that reason, I think students should go abroad. I say that with reservation, however. Since this is my last article (and no one can fire me), I don’t think all the ACA programs accomplish what they self-advertise, and I don’t think all SM positions have as effective an impact as they

should. I think a lot of students go abroad unprepared, and they come back jaded. I certainly did.

During my time writing/editing for this column, I tried to gather as much information as possible so students considering going abroad might know what they’re walking into.

I hope the issues that students have raised in regards to both the ACA and SM programs will not be forgotten. I don’t think either program should be immune to criticism if it is constructive.

Supposedly, only 20 percent of the population has the “wanderlust” gene.3 I hardly feel that’s indicative of who enjoys or is capable of enjoying travel.

If you’re a student thinking about going abroad, I encourage you to do so. But think about it first. Do some research and talk to people who have been there before you. You can’t prepare for everything, but you can be intelligent about preparing.

http://elitedaily.com/life/culture/wanderlust-gene-peopleborn-travel/953464/ http://www.huffingtonpost.com/map-happy/is-therereally-a-wanderl_b_7057672.html 3 http://elitedaily.com/life/culture/wanderlust-gene-peopleborn-travel/953464/ 1 2

12 LIFE COLUMN & CULTURE

BRICK IN THE WALL JONI HARRIS COLUMNIST

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he band Pink Floyd famously told us that “we don’t need no education” because education is simply “thought control” and “all in all you’re just another brick in the wall.”1 I don’t know what Pink Floyd meant by all of that, but let’s just say he was talking about how we're all just bricks in a wall, or cogs in a wheel. A part of an oppressive system that tries to churn us all out the same.

I think theorist Michel Foucault would agree. He theorized that authority, or the representation of an ever-present authority, such as a security camera, can cause people to lose their individuality. He says this

because the presence of a camera, whether it is on or not, causes people to behave in a way they know the authority wants them to.

Foucault claims that by operating out of fear to appease an authority prevents them from behaving how they naturally would without

any observation, and that this limits society and individuals’ creativity.2 However, I think that we as humans have the capacity to know when to follow the rules, and when not to. When someone tells us, for instance, to build a wall to keep

some people out of our country, we have the ability to think critically, to choose not to be a brick in that wall, and to fight against it. And hopefully that is what we are doing here at Walla Walla University—learning to think critically no matter which discipline we have chosen. And while classes can be difficult, "you can’t have any pudding if you don’t eat yer meat.” I for one am thrilled to be wrapping up my senior year. However, after graduation I’ll be heading off to grad school, aka “Another Brick in the Wall pt. 2.”

http://www.azlyrics.com/p/pinkfloyd.html https://foucault.info/doc/documents/disciplineandpunish/ foucault-disciplineandpunish-panopticism-html

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PEXELS

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EPIPHANIES: GOING BACK HOME DARLING SU CULTURE WRITER

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s the last weeks of school wind down, most of us are packing up our rooms and getting ready to head back home. It will be a bittersweet feeling to leave the responsibilities of college for a few months, unless you are a post-grad entering the job search in the real world, of course. The readjustment can take awhile, especially if you live in another country. But after being away from home for nine months, I realize I cannot wait any longer to reunite with my family, Gouda cheese, and my bike. Since it won’t take long until that day, I wrote a list of seven reasons why I am thankful to go home to Amsterdam in a few weeks.

• Laundry! If I happen to be lucky, someone else will do it for me, and I will not have to spend any of my quarters on it.

• Mother’s food. Au revoir, caf food. I cannot stress this enough. Since my college career started, I have learned

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to appreciate every meal made by my mother’s hands. Homemade chicken and free food are calling my name.

• Sleeping in my own bed. This is by far the most beautiful reunion I’ll ever have. I'll realize how much I’ve missed sleeping in my own bed after being away from it for so long.

• Good-bye, alarm clock. With no reason to wake up at 8 a.m., I will no longer

need to hear the annoying beeping and buzzing noises jarring me out of my peaceful sleep. Instead, I’ll be woken up by a dog licking my face, the smell of breakfast coming up from the kitchen, or by the sunrays blinding my eyes at noon.

• Soft, quality toilet paper. With the amount we pay for tuition, you would think they would at least give you some luxury in the bathroom. I have to admit,

I never thought there would be a day when I would appreciate the toilet paper at home. Well, it’s all about the little things.

• The joys of a clean bathroom. For the coming months, I'll no longer need to wear flip-flops in the shower. The glorious feeling of showering barefoot with my feet touching the clean tile is something too often underrated.

• Sleep. Why do I keep forgetting that sleep is such a wonderful thing? Maybe because I am not getting enough sleep to remember. The need to catch up on sleep lost during the week feels too real for all us as the school year ends.

Another thing, this may be weird but I hope you can relate to it: Whenever I am on break, I always have a dream about a major project that is due the next day. I then wake up in terrified confusion because it is summer, and I no longer should be stressing out about quizzes, tests, assignments, projects, or presentations. It looks like the stress and anxiety of school keeps haunting you, even on a break. Anyways, I wish you all good luck with finals, and finish out the year strong!

HUMOR & COLLEGIAN WISDOM LIFE 13

I AM FINALLY AN ADULT MICAH HALL HUMOR WRITER

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y college experience has lasted for four blissful years. This has given me plenty of time to read all the bad posts my acquaintances share on Facebook. I have noticed that many of my acquaintances have been posting things about adulting.1 Adulting is basically a verb that can be used whenever someone is doing something boring that their parents used to do. It is a way of expressing the realization that you are entering another stage of life.

Starting a new stage of life can be confusing, so I will give you a very important tip for managing all of life’s new challenges: just Google everything. To this day, I have never made a cover letter, filed my taxes, made a budget, or really any other

mature thing without first looking it up on the internet. Every time I have looked something up, it has appeared.2 Unless you decide to go into a field that cannot be Googled, that is all you need to know about being an adult.3 This is literally all you need to know about being an adult.

Unless something changes in the near future, every single thing you could ever want to know is on the internet.

Remember, if you have any questions, send me an email at micahhall@gmail.com.

Don't send it to my school email. I only use my school email for Spotify discounts.

Beginning a new stage of life is also difficult for me. I would like to let everyone know that this is my last article for The Collegian.4 I still remember my first day as a staff member my freshman year. I still remember the day where Lauren Lewis told us that we were not allowed to use

the words penis, testicles, and vagina. I even remember the day where John McVay called me to his office to let me know that he had read my article.

At one of the final milestones of this school year, I hope you can all look back and say that you had a good time at Walla Walla University.

COLLEGIAN WISDOM

A Creationist is suing the Grand Canyon for religious discrimination.

This is often stylized as #Adulting, but I will not do that for the obvious reason that it is bad and I do not like it.

I accidentally searched “How to do your taxes if you are poo” instead of “poor.” This is a good way to find tax advice that uses the phrase “poo-poo.” There are a lot of results and I suggest doing this.

3 Of course, if you can’t find something on Google, it probably doesn’t exist.

4 No, you do not need to send me flowers.

1 2

They are also suing the rest of science, nature, and observable evidence.

Washington driver offers police Taco Bell to ignore cocaine in car.

Think outside the pipe.

Idaho man is rushed to the hospital after a fidget spinner gets stuck in his anus.

Apply spinner directly to outlet of anxious behaviors.

Police recover over one million dollars of stolen bees in a raid.

It was quite the sting.

House Majority Leader McMasters says he thinks Trump is getting paid by Putin.

Paul Ryan asked everyone to please not leak this.

14 LIFE FASHION & #THECOLLEGIAN

STUDENT STYLE: CLAUDIA VELASCO ANGELICA CHAN FASHION WRITER

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elcome to Student Style, where we explore Walla Walla students’ unique style and fashion choices. Today, we have Claudia Velasco, a freshman nursing major. I asked to interview Claudia because her outfits always look girly and fun.

What do you do for fun—do you have any unique hobbies or interests?

I don’t know if working out is a hobby, but I like being outside in nature. I like photography and spending time with friends. It’s hard to schedule because of school. And I love traveling whenever possible.

Who or what inspires your style?

I really like to look at Vogue. I use Instagram and follow a bunch of beauty vloggers for inspiration. As far as celebrity icons go, I like Selena Gomez, Vanessa Hudgens, and Kendall Jenner a lot.

How would you describe your sense of style?

I like casual and girly stuff. I like a lot of bohemian inspired clothing, and I like to layer. I find that I don’t wear a lot of color. I love florals but also my basic colors and interesting fabrics and patterns.

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ANGELICA CHAN

What are your favorite trends right now?

Do you follow trends?

I haven’t really been following the trends this season. I really like the '90s comeback trend, and casual dresses with sneakers—kind of the Cali-girl vibe.

If you could raid anyone’s closet, who would it be and why?

That would for sure be the Jenner sisters or Gigi Hadid.

Where are the items in your outfit from?

Shorts: Hollister, Shirt: Pacsun, Choker: H&M Why did you choose this particular outfit (influenced by the weather, schedule, etc.)?

It’s probably both weather and schedule. Whenever I go out and don’t have time to carefully pick out my clothes, I have a list of outfits I wear when I don’t know what to wear, which was super helpful.

Where do you like to shop?

One of my favorite stores is Forever 21 because they have so many clothes—I love it. I like H&M, and I love going into Nordstrom. And I love the jeans from American Eagle.

What fashion advice would you give to other students looking to improve their style?

I’d say just be yourself. Look at social media at people who inspire you.

Be comfortable—that’s most important because then you’re not trying to be someone else. Don’t try to be someone you’re not. Explore and don’t be afraid to try new things.

#THECOLLEGIAN

@techygrizz101

@tim.kosaka

@wwuaviation

@sashajane

SCIENCE LIFE 15

THE NOT-SO-SURPRISING EFFECT NATURE HAS ON HEALTH

JORDAN BROOKS SCIENCE WRITER

“In every walk with nature one receives far more than he seeks.”

John Muir

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ith the warm weather of spring comes the natural urge to be outdoors; not only to be outdoors, but to be in nature.

Climbing a mountain, cycling through farmland, and relaxing in a grassy park are all medications for a deep, burning desire to commune with something more than humankind and its own creation. While already recognized as fun and relaxing, it seems there should be more vocalization about the measurable benefits spending time in nature has for individuals and greater communities.

How does interacting with nature benefit people? This question has been asked through different lenses by people in diverse fields of study. In 2013, the International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health published an article that reviewed the findings of hundreds of primary articles on this question.1 The papers they reviewed were published in diverse geographical and cultural contexts (Asia, North America, Europe, and Australia) and in diverse fields of study (social sciences, environmental sciences, health sciences, planning and design, and more). Through the review, they found that there is a plethora of measurable benefits to intentionally spending time in nature.

Spending time nature also has psychological and community benefits.2 Decreased depression and anger and increased self-esteem are associated with spending time in nature. Also, in more urbanized environments, going to community parks or gardens fosters group interactions and perhaps even shared work for a common community goal. One particularly interesting discovery is nature’s influence over cognitive ability. A team of researchers found that students who took a walk through an arboretum scored better on cognitive assessment than those who

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walked on a busy city street.3 The posited explanation is that when in a densely populated urban environment, there are many things competing for your attention, all of which are important. This leads to mental fatigue and stress, which decreases one’s ability to think and problem solve.

Interaction with nature also seems to have health and healing benefits, which may seem strange through our lens of sterile, surgical, and drug-based medicine.4 People who spent time in nature had decreased blood cortisol levels and decreased synthesis of salivary amylase, which both increase in response to stress. Also, a research group in Pennsylvania found that post-operative healing for cholecystectomy patients who had a window-view of nature was less than those who did not. Even for those not in

the hospital, researchers found a correlation between the presence of indoor plants and reduced occurrence of illness!

It is important to consider that the reviewers of this vast body of research noted that the studies carry with them culture-based trends and interpretations and some were completed without proper technique (including not having controlled experiments or not collecting data on age, gender, ethnicity, etc.). While some of the research is questionable, there is still an overwhelming body of evidence to support the commonly-shared anecdotal benefits of nature.

As humanity drifts to an ever-increasing state of urbanization, it is important to remember the benefits of nature. While not fully understood scientifically, the benefits

seem to be holistic–interacting with almost every part of our lives. Perhaps being in nature is inescapably hardwired into our biology. So when you start studying for finals in a couple of weeks, take a break and reap the benefits of going outside.

Keniger, L.; Gaston, K.; Irvine, K.; Fuller, R. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health 2013, 10 (3), 913–935. ibid 3 ibid 4 ibid 1 2

SIDE

SUNNY

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ALL THE VERBATIMS! LAUREN WAHLEN BACKPAGE WRITER

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’d just like to congratulate everyone for making it this far in the school year—we’re almost done! Well, maybe I shouldn’t say “we,” considering I have (I mean...get?) to do summer school #yayformasters. Speaking of, I’ve been thinking. I think it would be a good idea for you guys to stick around for the summer! Forget your plans of far-off

adventure and stay! No, for real. STAY! Why would you ever want to leave this beautiful, glorious campus? Wouldn’t you miss all the, um, the...ok so I can’t think of any reason you would want to stay off the top of my head, but I’ll be so lonely without you guys. Think of my social life. Bad things happen when I don’t have people to talk to. Like, I’ll probs befriend

a tree or something, and that would be weird.

Don’t make me weird, guys. Just stay.

Now that I’ve convinced you all that this campus is the ~place to be~ this summer, I’m gonna quit while I’m ahead and give you what you guys really turn to the backpage for: the verbatims. These are the rest of the verbatims I’ve gotten, besides maybe the first couple

weeks, when I told you guys to email me at lauren.wahlen@yahoo.com and then I realized that email doesn’t even exist…my b. So enjoy.

And thanks to everyone who contributed!

‘Cause without you, the Verbatim section would have just been a bunch of quotes about cognitive behavioral therapy and like, idk, poverty.

VERBATIM “Do you know how rockets take off? No, you don't, because all you think about is yourselves.”

– Professor Curt Nelson

“Old people read their Bibles more, cause they’re cramming for their finals.”

– Professor Bruce Toews

“I think we should chuck ordination out the window!”

– Professor Dave Thomas

“Hug an alumni and pick their pocket at the same time.”

– Professor Curt Nelson

“This is a spicy little number.”

– Professor Benjamin Jackson in relation to the sqrt(17)/4

“When you come to a fork in the road, take it.”

– Professor Curt Nelson, in relation to current division

“This is a nice Adventist circuit, it adheres to the 28 fundamental beliefs.”

– Professor Curt Nelson

“I feel like I could let you go early but my morals are too low to do that.”

– Professor Curt Nelson

“Oh. Good thing I didn’t go into art. Or maybe I did!”

– Professor Curt Nelson, on a circuit diagram

“I kind of like the bags of drugs!”

- Professor Shirley Anderson

“I’m feeling giddy!”

- Professor Curt Nelson, while clapping his arms.

“Men are barely civilized primates.”

– Professor Monty Buell

“But did any of you ask how this circuit feels? No, you didn’t, because you’re selfish.

How would you all feel if people were analyzing you?”

– Professor Curt Nelson

“Walla Walla University: Those beeping graphics professors.”

– Professor Brent Bergherm, being Brent

“There’s only so much you can take off and still do math.”

– Professor Benjamin Jackson complaining about how hot Kretschmar has been

“The world needs more rebels!”

– Professor Curt Nelson while writing 16,666.66 instead of 16,666.67

“Do you smell what I’m standing in?”

– Professor Curt Nelson, on understanding a circuit

“I took a minor in dance while in college.”

– Professor Roy Campbell, while doing a pirouette to explain a circuit

“There are only a few good shaped heads in the world. The rest need to be covered.”

– Professor Curt Nelson

“And all the peasants rejoiced!”

– Professor Ross Magi, after showing that the two mixed partial derivatives were the same

“I will be a good grandpa and only show you a few pictures, then fold my wallet away.”

– Professor Paul Dybdahl, on covering lengthy content from his dissertation

“First we will learn about stupid phasors, then the smart ones.”

– Professor Curt Nelson, in circuits

FOLLOW THE COLLEGIAN ON

“Most people go to Disneyland; English monarchs fight the French.”

– Professor Terry Gottschall, on Henry III’s war on France

“My objective is to remove your prejudices, and make you proper capitalists.”

– Professor Don Riley, on why vibrations tests could not be curved without violating the principle that nothing comes for free

“No one is going to turn in a one page article to me. I have matches in my office.

I will burn it.”

– Professor Nancy Semotiuk, on writing a long article

“There are places in the world where people don’t have the pleasure of eating themselves to death.” – Professor Benjamin Jackson, speaking about the carrying capacity of the Earth