Volume 101 Issue 13

The Collegian Walla Walla University

Volume 101

Issue 13

26 JAN 2017

AMERICA: WHY U IS DUM

5 8

GLOBAL SERVICE

14

SCIENCE

15

FOOD

dear reader,

These are a few of my favorite things

This past weekend has been a rollercoaster of emotions. First, about Walla Walla University…

Donald Trump was inaugurated on Friday. You can read our columnist’s experience of what it was like to be at this extremely controversial inauguration. Then, the next day, there were Women’s Marches all #1 There are many places to study around the world including Walla Walla, which you can read about in on campus the News and Humor section. All in all, it’s been one crazy weekend so I #2 Our school has a esoteric history about a “half-tree” hope this issue finds you in good health and sanity. symbol Anyhow, I’m gonna keep this short and sweet and to the point so I hope you enjoy our feature about “Y u is dum” (probably one of the best You may or may not have noticed the many “half-tree” symbols titles we have come up with as team) and all the other exciting tidbits around our campus. For many years, there has been speculation as to we have in store for you. weather this symbol signified anything. There have been numerous Thank you for keeping The Collegian alive through your generous ASWWU videos and Collegians that have tried to identify the origins of support, encouragement, and contributions. the “half-tree.” Regardless of if you will ever discover the truth behind the You can send any comments, questions, or contributions to aswwu. half-tree, I hope you will come to love all the little quirks like that half-tree collegian@wallawalla.edu or matthew.moran@wallawalla.edu. that make WWU so unique and special. And who knows...maybe you As always, enjoy and IPFY (i.e. I’m praying for you) every day! might be invited into the club of the “half-tree.” Be on the lookout for it will come when you least expect it.

Editor-in-chief Matthew Moran

context

3

Perspective

11

@Herb Landau

Table of Contents | 02 News & Senate | 03 Week in Forecast | 04

editor-in-chief Matthew Moran assistant editor Abigail Wissink Head layout editor Fränk Ramirez Head Copy editor Sophia Rich

columnist Joni Harris

news writers Kyler Alvord Lauren Epperson

Fashion writer Angelica Chan

food writer Mason Neil feature editors Brandon Pierce Michael Jensen Ysabela Ramirez Bryndilynn Goodlyn

Life editor Micah Hall

humor writer Micah Hall

backpage editor Lauren Wahlen

opinion writer Yvanna Hammen-Alvarez

religion writer Vixie Bailey

@ Angelica Chan

15

Feature | 05 Global Service | 08 Opinion | 09 Devotional | 10 Fashion & ACA/SM | 11

layout designers Anna-Marie Vargas Claudia Curtis Geoffrey Lopes Hannah Chebeleu

Copy Editors Katherine Beckner NOW HIRING

LIFE

Devotional writer Christina Moran

@Mason Neil

Religion & Creative Writing | 12 Humor & Column | 13 Science | 14 Culture & Food | 15 Sunny Side Up | 16

If you are interested in contributing to The Collegian, speak with one of our illustrious staff members. The Collegian is enhanced by regularly incorporating a wide range of campus perspectives.

Culture/travel writer Darling Su ACA/SM Editor Stephanie Septembre Science writer Jordan Brooks Creative writing editor Mac Ford global service writer Daniel Villarreal

Cover Credit: ASWWU The Collegian is the official publication of ASWWU. Its views and opinions are not necessarily the official stance of Walla Walla University or its administration, faculty, staff, or students. Questions, letters, and comments can be sent to aswwu. collegian@wallawalla.edu or matthew.moran@wallawalla.edu. This issue was completed at 2:00 A.M. on Thursday, January 26 , 2016.

Office Manager AnneMarie Vixie distributors Jaziel Villalvzo Victoria Ico

The Collegian | Volume 101, Issue 13 | 204 S. College Avenue, College Place, WA 99324 https://issuu.com/aswwucollegian

NEWS/SENATE CONTEXT

3

@MATTHEW MORAN

MARCHING FOR EQUALITY Kyler Alvord News Writer

C

rowds of people marched through downtown Walla Walla, Washington, on Saturday morning to partake in the Women’s March on Washington from afar.

The nationwide march is a response to the growing concerns of gender inequality and limited healthcare access in the United States. It was scheduled on Jan. 21, the day after Inauguration Day, not to boycott

SENATE This week, Senate had one bill in old business and six bills in new business.

President Trump but to send a message that they want their voices heard.

“At its simplest, the Women’s March on Walla Walla was to celebrate and support women, women’s rights and at-risk friends and neighbors,” said Courtney MacPhee, a participant in the march. “I had originally planned to drive home to Portland for the Women’s March, but I felt it was necessary to take action in the community I am currently in.”

The Women’s March on Washington in the District of Columbia was the largest one-day protest in U.S. history, and the

smaller protests in cities around the nation weren’t lacking participants either.

Whitman College students joined forces with Walla Walla University students to lead in chants, and a WWU professor even led out in song. The march built bridges between strangers and gave skeptics of the current political climate something positive to focus on.

“It seems harder these days to get people passionate and excited about social justice. It was really special seeing how such a small town can land on the map and make a difference,” MacPhee said. “Afterwards

everyone was just beaming. We were all on a high.”

Men and women of all ages joined the Walla Walla march, each with a different motivation. Some walked to bring awareness to the wage gap, some walked in support of the trans community, some walked to combat the hypersexualization of women and some walked to promote easy access to healthcare for future girls and women.

The one thing they all had in common?

“We came out to celebrate women, and to support them for all the trials they have gone through and are going through and will go through,” Mac Phee said.

OLD BUSINESS:

G.L. 8 - FACULTY AND STAFF ATTENDANCE REQUIREMENT This bill would remove the attendance requirement for faculty and staff senators.

F.L. 5 - PRE-PROFESSIONAL CLUB FORUM FUNDING This bill would provide funds to buy food for the Pre-Professional Club forum.

G.L. 9 - CONSTITUTIONAL STATEMENT OF INCLUSIVITY This bill would add a statement of Inclusivity to the ASWWU Constitution.

F.L. - DRUM KIT This bill would provide funding for a drum kit that could be used for on-campus events.

G.L. 6 WAS TABLED INDEFINITELY This bill would have given ASWWU access to the quasi-endowment in 10 years instead of 24.

NEW BUSINESS: G.L. 7 - EVP BILL AUTHORSHIP This bill would allow the EVP to present bills in Senate.

F.L. 4 - SM MEDIA FLASH DRIVES This bill would provide funds for Flash drives.

These flash drives would be sent to SMs with all of the year’s Collegians, ASWWU Videos, and ASWWU Photos.

If you have any questions about these bills, contact your senator. More information will be available in your Senate update email!

@LINDA IVY

PSI CHI Linda Ivy Contributor Writer

T

he Walla Walla University psychology program recently reactivated its chapter of Psi Chi—the International Honors Society in Psychology.

Psi Chi, founded in 1929, offers a variety of benefits to students who are eligible for membership, including access to journals, invitations to conferences, and opportunities for grants and awards. To be eligible, students must be at least at sophomore level, have a high GPA in psychology courses, as well as an overall GPA that places them in the top

@Herb Landau

ART AUCTION 35 percent of all students in their university class. Once inducted, students receive a lifelong membership.

This year, seven psychology majors qualified for membership, and they were officially inducted into Psi Chi at the end of fall term. On Jan. 19, the psychology department held a ceremony in Smith Hall to introduce and honor these students.

Pictured above, from left to right: Marissa Osborne, Senior; Diana Mignott, Sophomore; Elizabeth Harder, Junior; Hannah Jutzy, Junior; Kiri Fischer, Junior; Ellen Sperl, Junior; Linda Ivy, Psychology Faculty; Jasmine Haddad, Sophomore, Austin Archer, Psi Chi Faculty Adviser; Denise Dunzweiler, Dean, School of Education and Psychology.

Lauren Epperson News Writer

W

alla Walla University students will be showcasing their artwork at the Atlas Friday, Jan. 28 from 12-2 p.m.

Students are showcasing and selling their artwork, to benefit the ASWWU Global Service project.

Food, drinks, and live music will all be at this fundraising auction. Several student bands will be performing live music during the event.

Last year’s art auction was a big success and created a lot of buzz. Global Service partnered with the Atlas team to bring this year’s art auction to the community of Walla Walla.

Mareliza DeJesus, senior business major said, “I hope to sell t-shirts and artwork to be able to make a large dent in our fundraising goal.”

4

NO INFO GOES ON THI

CONTEXT WEEK IN FORECAST

WEEK IN FORECAST FRIDAY

THURSDAY

@GOOGLE

SATURDAY

@PEXELS

@ASWWU

Jan 26

Jan 27

Jan 28

Friendship Tournament

Friendship Tournament

Friendship Tournament

ASWWU Global Service Art Auction 12-3 p.m. at The Atlas

ASWWU Outdoors Avalanche Training

ASWWU Outdoors Avalanche Training

SUNDAY

Open Mic 7-9 p.m. at The Atlas

TUESDAY

MONDAY

@GOOGLE

@PEXELS

@KAIKOPITSKE

Jan 29

Jan 30

Jan 31

Sleeping Beauty was released in 1959 58 Years Ago

Humanities CommUnity 11:00 a.m. WWU Church

Music Recital 7:00 p.m. FAC Auditorium

Coming up

January 24-25 Auditions for Amateur Hour

February 4 ASWWU Social Movie Night

February 2-5 Black History Month Celebration

February 11 Battle of the Bands

February 24-26 42nd Annual AAUW Book Sale Marcus Whitman Hotel

IS BLOCK

FEATURE PERSPECTIVE

WHY U IS DUM

TOMMY MOEN

Brandon pierce Feature Editor

E

ducation in the United States is strongly correlated with a number of things, a better life being the most popular. “A strong education will result in a good paying job and a happy life” is a phrase you might have heard at some point in your life, either from a parent or educator. While statistics do suggest that higher levels of education lead to higher paying jobs, what happens to a nation that cannot offer each citizen the chance to go to primary, secondary, and postsecondary schools? Are the rest of these citizens out of luck? The answer isn’t so clear. No matter how you slice it-by neighborhood,

by state, or by country-areas with low levels of education also experience higher levels of unemployment and crime. While correlation does not equal causation, low levels of literacy do indicate low economic development in areas without access to quality educational services.

It’s a good thing we live in the United States right? With compulsory primary and secondary education nationwide, our nation should be up there with the best of them when it comes to test scores, literacy, and other measures of educational growth.

Even with a stellar literacy rate of 99 percent according to the CIA,1 there are still 27 nations with higher literacy rates. Literacy rate doesn’t tell the whole story of course, it is simply the most accessible way to compare education across international borders. The United States is far from illiterate, but liter-

acy should be the bare bones minimum of acceptable educational standards. Thanks to economic globalization the world economy is becoming increasingly technical and specialized, and education’s place as a national metric and as civic service is beginning to show the cracks beneath the surface of a 99 percent literate populace.

According to David E. Drew, professor of education and executive management at Claremont Graduate University, the three mistakes made by American educators that undermine student learning—or three things wrong with the American school system—are basing educational decisions on aptitude, failing to learn from research and experience, and relying on poorly designed testing programs.2 Drew argues that these three mistakes are crucial to understanding the United States’ perennial position near

the top of the international bell curve in regards to education. “I believe the single biggest mistake educators make is to tell some-actually many-students that they are not smart enough to master complex materials, e.g. mathematics,”3 argues Drew.

This mistake becomes manifest in the idea that students of color, female students, and students from poverty are somehow less able to understand the intricacies of finite element analysis, digital logic, or anything other subject in the economically en vogue STEM fields. “This is wrong 99 percent of the time. Yet, frequently students of color, girls and women, and students from poverty are discouraged or prevented from studying the subjects they need because of such erroneous judgments.”4

CONT. ON PAGE 7

5

6

NO INFO GOES ON THI

PERSPECTIVE FEATURE

WHAT CAN WE DO TOMMY MOEN

YsaBela ramirez Feature Editor

S

o we know that our schools are failing, but why and how do we fix the problem? Some may suggest that underfunding is the problem and money is the solution. After all, what better thing could we invest in as a nation besides the education of future generations?

The truth is, spending more money on students does not always mean students will perform at a higher level. As you might have noticed in the previous point, the lack of correlation between money spent and student performance becomes apparent when comparing the United States to the international community in terms of educational spending and performance. Japan spends an average $8,492 per student,1 and Korea spends an average of $7,652 per student,2 while the United States spends an average of $11,700 per student. Yet Japan ranked first and Korea second in the 2015 PISA international exam for math, science, and reading while the United States lagged in 32nd place. 3 A quick look at private school spending as compared to public school spending per student further illustrates the lack of correlation between funds and performance. Right here in the Walla Walla Valley, the public school district spends $11,889 per student6 while Walla Walla Valley Academy charges $9,647 per student7—that is $2,242 less

per person. 80 school districts spend more than $40,000 per student, yet tuition for America’s top ranked private school, Phillips Exeter Academy, is only $37,125. 5 On average, private schools charge $10,749 per year, almost $1,000 less than the national average and still NAEP 2013: READING REPORT CARD

PRIVATE

PUBLIC

BASIC

82

67

PROFICIENT

49

34

ADVANCED

14

8

GRADE 8 PRIVATE

PUBLIC

BASIC

91

77

PROFICIENT

49

34

ADVANCED

14

8

NAEP 2013: MATH REPORT CARD GRADE 4 PUBLIC

BASIC

82

67

PROFICIENT

49

34

ADVANCED

14

8

GRADE 8 PRIVATE

PERCENTAGE OF 2011 GRADUATES GOING TO A 4-YEAR COLLEGES PRIVATE HIGH SCHOOLS - 64%

GRADE 4

PRIVATE

consistently provide better results than their public counterparts. Don’t believe me, look at the data yourself8: Why do private schools perform consistently better than their public school counterparts? The simplest answer is: They have to. If they don’t perform

PUBLIC

BASIC

82

67

PROFICIENT

49

34

ADVANCED

14

8

http://www.capenet.org/facts.html

PUBLIC SCHOOLS - 40% CHARTERS - 37% http://www.capenet.org/facts.html

better they will not survive because no one will send their children there. For example, my eighth grade year at La Sierra Academy, the school hired a new science teacher to replace the excellent teacher we had lost. Unfortunately her performance was dismal: She rarely gave lectures and often fell asleep during class leaving the students unsupervised.

People complained and some students even took videos of her sleeping during class and showed them to the principal, but she was still hired for a second year of teaching. The parents who were spending money out of pocket to send their children to school there found this to be unacceptable and protested loudly. They signed petitions and even took the issue to the school board. The next year, she was not asked to return as a teacher and the school was able to find a replacement who was able to teach students effectively.

This scenario would not be possible in a public school setting due to tenure, as we will find out.

The single most important factor to a student’s schooling is the teacher. An excellent teacher can make the difference, even in the worst circumstances. Just look at the true story of a high school math teacher, Jaime Escalante (documented in the 1988 film “Stand and Deliver”), who takes a class of potential dropouts and transforms them into high achieving students. Using the tools of hard work and high expectations, he guides them through the principles of calculus. At the end of the year, the entire class of 18 passes a college credit calculus exam—a feat so unbelievable that the testing agency investigates them for cheating.

If teachers are the most important part of our school system, there should be a system in place that rewards good teachers, trains and supports new teachers, and eliminates chronically bad teachers. Unfortunately, our system does none of these things. In fact, it does the opposite.

Very few public schools pay their teachers based on merit and not even tenure is granted based on a teacher’s performance. In California, teachers are granted tenure after only two years of teaching (32 states grant tenure after three years, nine grant it after four to five, and four never grant tenure).9, 10 Tenure laws also hurt the ability of new teachers to develop their skills because schools fire and transfer teachers based on seniority—not on skill. When a school needs to cut jobs, they are forced

IS BLOCK

FEATURE PERSPECTIVE

2015 PISA AVERAGE SCORES OF MATH, SCIENCE, AND READING OECD MEMBER COUNTRIES INT. AVG. JAPAN KOREA SWITZERLAND ESTONIA CANADA NETHERLANDS DENMARK FINLAND SLOVENIA BELGIUM GERMANY IRELAND POLAND NORWAY AUSTRIA NEW ZEALAND AUSTRALIA SWEDEN FRANCE CZECH REPUBLIC PORTUGAL UNITED KINGDOM ITALY ICELAND LUXEMBOURG SPAIN LATVIA HUNGARY SLOVAK ISRAEL UNITED STATES GREECE CHILE TURKEY MEXICO 0

100 200 300 400 500

NOTE: This graph was created using data from the official web page of OECD: Better Policies for Better Lives, the organization that organizes the PISA test mentioned. https://www.oecd.org/pisa/data/

to fire the newest teachers first. “The Economist” tells the story of one promising teacher who was fired because of the seniority rule: “Josh, a young social-studies teacher working in a tough part of Los Angeles, had been on the job for less than a year when word came that it might not last much longer. Its public finances in ruins, California was slashing budgets and laying off thousands of teachers. Josh’s headmaster fought to keep him, but his hands were tied; under the state’s strict “last in, first out” seniority rules, enshrined in statute, the most recent recruits had to be fired first, regardless of ability.”11 One of the worst and most obvious effects of the tenure of high school teachers is the fact that it makes it almost impossible to fire bad teachers. In any given year, California will probably fire a grand total of two tenured teachers out of the 277,000 teachers it employs—that is .ooo7 percent. 12 To put that into perspective: more doctors lose their license

to practice medicine in the course of a year at a rate of .3 percent 13 Even when tenured teachers are fired, it is rarely because of poor teaching and is often due to much more serious and illegal offenses, such as sexual assault. In fact, 80 percent of teachers who are fired are fired for behavior other than poor teaching performance. 14 The LA Times describes the problem this way: “Building a case for dismissal is so time-consuming, costly and draining for principals and administrators that many say they don’t make the effort except in the most egregious cases. The vast majority of firings stem from blatant misconduct, including sexual abuse, other immoral or illegal behavior, insubordination or repeated violation of rules such as showing up on time.”

All this to say: money isn’t the cure-all for our educational system. Of course there is a threshold for the amount of money that is needed to run a school effectively and every school across the country should reach that threshold. But, once the school has enough money to run, the performance of that school will be based on the management of those resources. We need to look at the way the money is being spent and how it can be used more efficiently to benefit students.

We must streamline the systems in place so that schools are able to recruit and maintain good teachers and eliminate bad ones.

https://www.oecd.org/edu/EAG2012%20-%20Country%20note%20-%20Japan.pdf http://pisadataexplorer.oecd.org/ide/idepisa/ 3 http://www.oecd.org/pisa/pisafaq/ (the official site). One can request and find data sets here: http://pisadataexplorer. oecd.org/ide/idepisa/ 4 http://www.edweek.org/ew/section/multimedia/map-howper-pupil-spending-compares-across-us.html 5 https://www.exeter.edu/admissions-and-financial-aid/ tuition-financial-aid 6 http://www.edweek.org/ew/section/multimedia/map-howper-pupil-spending-compares-across-us.html 7 http://wwva.org/tuition-and-fees 8 http://www.capenet.org/facts.html 9 https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/undoing-the-harm-of-californias-teacher-tenure/2016/07/13/ ec56dd90-484b-11e6-bdb9-701687974517_story.html?utm_term=.9608c1e4c730 10 Washington Post, http://wap.st/2kv0Za7 11 http://www.economist.com/news/united-states/21599005reformers-want-make-it-easier-sack-bad-teachers-dancelemons 12 https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/undoing-the-harm-of-californias-teacher-tenure/2016/07/13/ ec56dd90-484b-11e6-bdb9-701687974517_story.html?utm_term=.9608c1e4c730 13 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/leonie-haimson/factchecking-waiting-for-_b_802900.html 14 http://www.latimes.com/local/la-me-teachers32009may03-story.html#page=1 1 2

CONT. FROM PAGE 5 In 2012 more than half a million 15-year-olds across the world participated in PISA, or the Programme for International Student Assessment. PISA is an standardized test administered by the Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development (OECD) that seeks to measure student skill in three key areas: mathematics, science, and reading. The findings of the 2012 PISA study indicated that the education system of the United States, the world’s largest single economy, is comparatively average against other OECD nations. While PISA notes that higher educational expenditure does not equal higher mathematics scores, the Slovak Republic, which scores favorably in on all areas, spent only $53,000 per student over a 10-year period. This is a difference of 46 percent when compared to the US, which spends roughly $115,000 per student. Only four nations, Austria, Luxembourg, Norway, and Switzerland, spend more money per student than the United States, yet, of the 34 OECD nations, the United States ranked 17th in math, 17th in reading and 21st in science. Not only is the United States scoring average for math and reading, and below average on science, we are paying more for the privilege to do so.

Looking at the data and through comparison to other sizable world economies, it is hard to argue that the American education system is not flawed in some ways. How can we fix our failing state of education?

One way we can improve overall education is through further investment in alternatives to the standard four-year college prescription. While it’s estimated that 82 percent of high school freshmen in 2014 will go on to graduate four years later,5 only 68 percent of those graduates will apply to higher education the following October, with 44 percent attending four-year colleges and 24 percent heading to two-year programs.6 Vocational schools, often called trade schools and defined in the 1984 Perkins Act as “organized educational programs offering a sequence of courses which are directly related to the preparation of individuals in paid or unpaid employment in current or emerging occupations requiring other than a baccalaureate or advanced degree,”7 offer a partial solution by offering advancement opportunities to the 18 percent of students not graduating and the 32 percent of graduates not attending two-or four-year programs the following year. Through

7

the appropriation of federal funds to the tune of some $1.3 billion, states apply and allocate their share of Perkins Grant funds with aims to increase the quality of technical education in secondary and post-secondary levels.

Vocational schools have received a stigma ever since their inception, and there doesn’t seem to be a clear reason why. By offering technical courses, such as carpentry, to students in secondary school and at standalone vocational colleges, not only are we offering more opportunities for people to receive an education, we are also providing alternative avenues to gain employment straight out of high school and to higher education, also with an alternative to the education a traditional liberal arts fouryear program offers altogether.

Not every student is cut for the rigors of academia, much in the same way not every student is cut for the hands-on, applied knowledge and tasks required of a certified plumber or welder. It takes a different mind to do different tasks well, and in our increasingly specialized world, it becomes a social and economic imperative to diversify our labor force. Recently, the United States shifted away from a labor-based economy dominated by “blue collar” jobs, where Americans produced the goods they would eventually consume, towards a capital-based economy dominated by the service sector, where the goods we consume are increasingly made in other countries thanks to globalization. Due to this shift, we must strike a healthy balance between preparing people for the jobs we have now and the jobs we might have a generation from now. By educating people in both the potential uses and limitations of computers we can not only future-proof the American labor force but also create more rounded individuals less reliant on technology. The best way to do so is to not only increase funding for vocational schools but also to end the stigma associated with going to a trade school instead of a four-year institution.

https://nationsencyclopedia.com/WorldStats/ CIA-World-Factbook-Literacy.html http://files.eric.ed.gov/fulltext/ED538236.pdf 3 Ibid.

4 Ibid.

5 www.oecd.org/pisa/data/ 6 https://nces.ed.gov/fastfacts/display.asp?id=805 7 https://nces.ed.gov/fastfacts/display.asp?id=51 8 https://nces.ed.gov/pubs/web/95024-2.asp 1 2

8

PERSPECTIVE GLOBAL SERVICE

NO INFO GOES ON THI

125th ANNIVERSARY HIGHLIGHT

OF SOOTHSAYERS AND AUGURS: A SHORT ACCOUNT OF THE HISTORY AND PHILOSOPHY DEPARTMENT DANIEL VILLARREAL Global Service Writer

DEPARTMENT MEMBERS Gregory Dodds Terrie Aamodt Montgomery Buell Linda Emmerson Timothy Golden Terry Gottschall

W

hen Walla Walla College was established, the Department of History and Philosophy was located in the Administration Building. Unlike today, however, in 1892 the Admin building contained two dormitory wings, a gymnasium, the president’s office, a chapel, classrooms, a chemistry laboratory, a library, a bookstore, a dining room, a kitchen, a bakery, a store room for the kitchen, a fruit room, and the business office.1 The agglomeration of different departments was reflected in the curriculums of the departments themselves, and history was no exception. The then called Department of History and Prophecy valued sacred history and included biblical prophecy as part of the curriculum. A 1907 Bulletin read, “the world’s history is studied from the standpoint of the working out the conflict between the opposing influences of good

and evil. The objects sought are to enable the student to see God at work in the affairs of men in accomplishing His purpose, to strengthen Faith in God’s Word by the study of prophecy, and through the lessons of history to develop strength of character and in insight into the events of our own time.”2 Whether studying history of antiquity, Medieval Europe, or modern history, students adhered to biblical interpretation and the application of prophecy.

History became part of the curriculum of Walla Walla College since it was established in 1892, and of the core set of classes required to graduate; it was not, however, referred as major in the bulletin until 1916, 24 years after the college was founded. Two years later the Walla Walla College Handbook introduced, under page 38, the Department of History led by Professor G.W. Rine.3 During the first half of the 20th century, professors such as W.C. Flaiz, G.W. Rine and William M. Landeen led the History Department. It important to note that William M. Landeen led the accreditation process of the college, which was finalized in 1935.⁴ In the 1960s, after a period of stagnation, the History and Philosophy Department went through a revival period led by Robert Henderson. By 1972, the department still shared the Administration Building with other departments. An official report by the Northwestern Association of Secondary and Higher Schools read, “the departments housed in the Administration Building rightfully [complained] of inadequate quarters—both the space allotments and the rat-warren maze arrangements defeat work and efficiency;”⁵ this remained for a few decades until the building burned down; only then the departments that decided to stay in the Administration Building had a chance to restructure their areas.

Today, the Department of History and Philosophy is still characterized by the commitment of providing students with the necessary tools to succeed. The current faculty includes Terrie Aamodt, Montgomery Buell, Gregory Dodds, Linda Emerson, Timothy Golden, and Terry Gottschall. Every one of them, in order to contribute to the high academic

professionalism of the department, is actively involved in publishing. Golden, who recently joined the staff and is currently Director of Legal Studies, has played an important role in enhancing the philosophy and legal studies minors. The quality and variety of the courses offered has allowed students who have graduated with a degree in history to go into fields such as elementary education, law, business, higher education, archeology, museum curating, and many more.

When asked why the study of history is relevant is today’s society, Gregory Dodds, who is currently the chair of the department, said, “The value of the study of history is not primarily in the memorization of facts about the past; history teaches us how to think critically, to read carefully, to express our thoughts and ideas, and to learn about different peoples, worldviews, experiences, and perspectives; it allows us to see the world through other people’s eyes.”

Historians are thought by some to be augurs, and they might as well be. In the past kings and rulers appealed to the powers of these figures because on they could ensure the safety and prosperity of their kingdoms.

Through the history of WWU, the History Department, though small, has played a crucial role in the development and preservation of this institution. Though its faculty, name, and curriculum have changed, this department still holds the high standards that have characterized it since its conception. Moving forward, it hopes to continue serving WWU as it has for more than 100 years, and train critical thinkers who act as ambassadors of truth across the globe.

1 Rogers, Clara E. A Brief History Walla Walla College.

Report. Walla Walla University.

2 The bulletins quoted are available upon request at archives of the Peterson Memorial Library.

3 Ibid. ⁴ Aamodt, Terrie Dopp. Bold venture: a history of Walla Walla College. College Place, WA: The College, 1992. ⁵ Northwestern Association of Secondary and Higher Schools. Commission on Higher Schools, Walla Walla University. 1972. A Confidential Report.

IS BLOCK

THE STAFF

Matthew Moran Editor-in-Chief

erson

Frank Ramirez Head Layout Editor

Yvanna Yvanna Hammen-Alvarez hammen-alvarez Opinion Writer Opinion Writer

F

eminism is said to be a movement for women’s rights to reachMoran gender equality Christina Devotional Writer in society. er Many times I’ve gotten shocked reactions when people discover that I am not a feminist. Responses can vary. hlen “But you’reAngelica an EnglishChan major!”

Fashion Writer Writer “Oh… okay…………” *insert face of disappointment here* “But you’re a woman!”

Mac Ford “You don’t believe in equal rights?”

Writing & And the listCreative can continue.

Contribution Editor riter To clarify, I am not saying that I think women are of lesser importance or déclassé.

That would be insulting myself, and I’m not a big fan of self-harm.

Katherine Beckner sales Let me reiterate that I understand very Copy Editor clearly that feminism is defined as a drive for equality. I like the idea of every human being under the sun having equal opportunities. e When I talk to some Lopes of my feminist Geoffrey main topics that they are Layout Designer ner friends, I hear two passionately against: rape culture and the Bryndi Goodlyn Feature Writer

Micah Hall Life Editor & Humor Writer

Kyler Alvord News Writer

sexualization of women. resemble those that would show up on an equally scandalous photo of a woman. “Hot” First of all, rape culture is deplorable.

Vixie Bailey and “sexy” would appear on both photos Women aren’t the only people getting Drew Sihotang Religion Writer Religion Writer Men get raped too. equally. In addition, the men and women in raped, though.

Maybe these types of suggestive magazine and media at this point someone would like to say, “Well, it happens more to women than pictures chose to have them taken. They are sexualizing themselves. Choice. Freedom of it does to men.” Does it though?Emily In 2010 Joni Harris Huso Columnist choice. Sounds like equal rights to me. a survey, which was published inColumnist the These two points make a lot of sense to American Journal of Public Health, April 17 me, but that’s not the reason why I’m not a edition,found the statistics to be shockingly feminist. I’m not so much against the movement equal.1 1.270 million women had affirmed Darling Su Mason Neil that they were victims of sexual Culture violence. & Travel of feminism—as far as feminists define it as Food Writer Writer “equal rights”—but more the attitude I have That number is huge! But so is the number perceived. I don’t agree with the treatment of 1.267 million. That’s the number of men men without respect when they offer a chair asserting that they, too, had been victims of Daniel Brooks or open a door. I don’t agree with the idea that sexual Villarreal assault. Even in its horridJordan state, rape Global & Science & Tech I need to snowball to a self-destructive place cultureService is equal.

Global Humanitarian Writer where I can do whatever I want with my body Did you know that sexualization isn’t Engineering Writer (abortion, sexual promiscuity, etc.) without just towards women? It happens to men expecting consequences. too. Men tend to check out women, yes, and What I have observed from “feminism” sometimes they’re vocal about it.Claudia But so are Curtis Lindsay Luna Layout Designer is not the same thing as equal rights. That women.

I’ve heard it on several occasions: Copy Editor would be egalitarianism. You could call me both men and women calling each other an egalitarian and be accurate. It’s just that out on their looks in aggressive ways, some decent and some not at all, equally. I am not I do not understand why I (an independent Michael Jenson woman who is not a feminist) would need saying thatPierce all men and all women cat-call, Brandon Feature Writer Feature Writer to call myself something to validate the fact but many have and do. Upon seeing a photo that I am an independent woman. I heard of a shirtless man, the comments would AnneMarie Vixie Office Manager

“I have to read seventy pages by tomorrow; I think I’m gonna kill myself !”

We hear the phrase almost every day, in regard to the pettiest things: too much homework, upcoming deadlines, studying for tests, or even being out in the cold weather.

I have heard peers and professors alike joking about suicide in everyday contexts.

The phrase has become somewhat of an American colloquialism, an exaggeration of one’s common stress and frustration.

However, this normalization of joking about killing oneself is deeply problematic; it

GOOGLE

an example once and I’m going to refine it: If I want to be a potato, for example, I am not going to call myself a “potato-ist.”

Instead, I am going to put on those potato skins and be a potato, and that’s all that there is to it. We don’t need a self-made title to define who we are. If you want to be a strong, independent woman, do it. I once read an anonymous quote that said, “A strong independent woman stands up for herself. A stronger independent woman stands up for others.” And that includes men.

God created man and woman. Two different genders. One thing I’m finding is that the word “different” has been compared synonymously with “bad.” Different isn’t bad, though. Each gender has been gifted by God with different, not necessarily bad, ways of being and that concept shouldn’t be condemned. If we were all the same in the way we are, then what excitement would there be in life? God made us all different for a reason—gender, race, personality. It’s all different and beautiful. I find that something to be celebrated rather than something to be protested.

http://www.slate.com/articles/double_x/doublex/2014/04/ male_rape_in_america_a_new_study_reveals_that_men_ are_sexually_assaulted.html

1

Cody Wilson Social Media & Photographer

“NOT A JOKING MATTER” joshua huh Opinion Writer

9

Abigail Wissink Assistant Editor

WE’RE MORE EQUAL THAN YOU THINK

Editor

rez er

OPINION PERSPECTIVE

reflects a culture that does not regard suicide as the serious health epidemic that it is.

Suicide is the second-leading cause of death among people aged 25 to 34 and the third-leading cause of death among people aged 15 to 24.1 College-aged women and men are among the most prone to experience risk factors such as depression, anxiety, feelings of hopelessness, and loss— all of which are linked to thoughts of suicide and self-harm. Furthermore, many people, including students here on our campus, have recently experienced the loss of a close friend or relative by suicide—this issue is neither distant nor irrelevant, affecting many of those around us.

As someone who has had extended periods of thoughts of suicide and self-

harm before, I am deeply triggered when others say that they would rather kill themselves than to engage in a particular task. It reminds me of a not-so-great time in my past when it seemed hopeless and unreasonable to continue life. Flippant remarks about killing oneself not only offend me, but evoke negative memories and ideas about myself and others that I would rather not return to.2 I do not write this to accuse or blame anyone for their choice of words. I have been accused of “speech policing” countless times before, but I think that this is different— issues of mental health and self-care cannot be made into a joke. Talking about suicide or self-harm, even facetiously, may be a cry for help: If someone brings up the issue, ask

if she or he is being serious, and make sure that she or he knows that there are resources for real care and help.3 I urge my reader to always remember that words are powerful and meaningful; certain subjects, such as suicide, must not go unnoticed or disregarded. If language is to reflect the way we think, then let’s be sensitive of others in our speech and actions.

1 http://www.emorycaresforyou.emory.edu/resources/ suicidestatistics.html 2 I’m actually doing really well at this point in my life. My reader has no reason to worry about 2017-Joshie: He is generally happy and excited about life.

3 Walla Walla University has free counseling services available for students. One may also contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255.

10

NO INFO GOES ON THI

PERSPECTIVE DEVOTIONAL

sing Christina Moran Devotional Writer

H

ymns are lovely. And as old and boring and square as you may think hymns may sound, I have learned that these ancient, seemingly archaic tunes are not as dull as we, millennials, think.

Growing up in a Seventh-day Adventist home, my family would have Friday night worships to open up the Sabbath. My older brother would play our slightly out-of-tune piano and my mom, dad, and I would open our hymnals to “How Great Thou Art” or “As Water to the Thirsty” and sing for half an hour, praising God together.

The hymns we sang have become a part of me. And sometimes at the pinnacle of worry and fear, when I feel like Jesus cannot possibly love—or even care a little bit for—a terrible student and disobedient stubborn daughter like me, I find myself singing my go-to hymn in my head, a hymn that I fall back on in times of loneliness. You might be familiar with this song. Anna Bartlett Warner and her sister, Susan Warner, wrote a novel titled “Say and Seal”, which was published in 1860. 1 Their novel and their name may have been forgotten, but the poem they wrote in their 1860 novel has been preserved throughout the years and has been taught to children around the world.2 It goes like this: Jesus loves me—this I know, For the Bible tells me so; Little ones to Him belong,— They are weak, but He is strong. 3 Sound familiar? In the novel, this poem was recited to a dying child.4 Hear-

@PAULGLATTS

ing the words of the poem, the child is comforted in his last moments.5 Shortly after its publication, this scene moved the book’s readers to tears and greatly affected William Bradbury, the man known for composing the hymn “Sweet Hour of Prayer” and other well-known hymns. 6 Two years after “Say and Seal” was published, William Bradbury, in love with the poem, gave it a simplistic tune and, to the end of the song, “Jesus Loves Me”, he added: Yes, Jesus loves me!

Yes, Jesus loves me!

Yes, Jesus loves me, The Bible tells me so.7 Simply by remembering this hymn I am constantly reminded Jesus has not left me because He loves me.

Isn’t music wonderful? The lyrics of the simplest tune can cheer us up and lift us out of our despair. And this is what the hymn, “Jesus Loves Me”, has done for me. Whenever I am overwhelmed with the cares of this world, I remember the hymns I have learned during Friday night family worships. Singing a hymn when I feel burdened reminds me to have confidence in the God who has promised to “stay, close beside me all the way”.8 That day when I “will take, up to heaven for His dear sake,” I will continue to sing of His love.9 Liles, Norma Lee. “History of “Jesus Loves Me, This I Know”.” Accessed January 23, 2017. www.whatistruth.info/ that/08/28.html.

2 Ibid.

3 https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Jesus_Loves_ Me&oldid=748081752 (accessed January 23, 2017).

4 Liles, Norma Lee. “History of “Jesus Loves Me, This I Know”.” Accessed January 23, 2017. www.whatistruth.info/ that/08/28.html.

5 Ibid.

6 Ibid.

7 https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Jesus_Loves_ Me&oldid=748081752 (accessed January 23, 2017).

8 Ibid.

9 Ibid.

1

@HANANALEU

WORSHIP OPPORTUNITIES Here are some options for worship activities on campus this week.

Heubach Morning Worship – Mon-Fri 7:30 a.m. (1 CREDIT) Heubach Worship – Tues 9 p.m. (2 CREDITS) Fireside Worship – Thurs 9:30 p.m. (1CREDIT) Hispanic Ministries Worship – Mon 7 p.m. (1CREDIT) Hall Worships – Wed 9:30 p.m. (1CREDIT) Prayer Meeting – Wed 7 p.m. (1CREDIT) Vespers – Fri 8 p.m. (2 CREDITS)

WORK FOR Concert Planner Spiritual Support

Marketing Director Graphic Designer

ASWWU Spiritual Peter.Flores@wallawalla.edu

Global Service Ivory.Vogt@wallawalla.edu

Filmmaker

Copy Editor

ASWWU Video Jacob.Patterson@wallawalla.edu

The Collegian Matthew.Moran@wallawalla.edu

Applications Available @ ASWWU.com. Email completed forms to department heads

#THECOLLEGIAN

@KTPALUMBO

@WWUAVIATION

@BACKSPINPOSE

@THELITTLEADVENTURIST

IS BLOCK

FASHION/ACA PERSPECTIVE

11

Student Style: annie Angelica Chan Fashion Writer

W

elcome to Student Style, where we explore Walla Walla students’ unique style and fashion choices. Today, we have Annie Gibson, a sophomore history major. I asked to interview Annie because she always looks elegant and classy without seeming pretentious. I also traveled through Europe with her, and I was very impressed at how she could pull a limited number of clothing items into many different outfits.

What do you do for fun—do you have any unique hobbies or interests?

“Urban trekking” —exploring cities by foot or public transit. Also, when the weather is good, some friends and I back in Portland will get together and play music on the streets for money.

Who or what inspires your style?

The Mexican painter Frida Kahlo. She embraced a colorful style that was traditional, yet very unique to the age that she lived in.

My rainy PNW is also an inspiration. I love the forest color palette and the edgy trends of Portland and Seattle.

ANNIE GIBSON - Sophomore - history major

How would you describe your sense of style?

It’s pretty much 21st century Nancy Drew.

Looking at my closet, I’ve got a lot of cardigans and skirts. My go-to shoes for school are a spiffy pair of BØrn oxfords and everything is accessorized with the dark plaid scarf I picked up in Edinburgh.

What are your favorite trends right now?

The low-ankle boot, it’s a wardrobe staple everyone needs (even you, guys). I’m also liking the elbow patches on sweaters and jackets. I know it’s such a small detail, but it adds a nice little retro touch.

Where do you like to shop?

Goodwill in downtown Walla Walla, and any other consignment stores. It’s great because they’re cheap, and you can pull together something chic and comfy while exploring and defining your personal style.

If you could raid anyone’s closet, who would it be and why?

Emma Watson. She’s got a style that works for looking professional while addressing the U.N., and also comfortable for one of her interviews. Almost all of her clothes and jewelry are organic and eco-friendly.

What fashion advice would you give to other students looking to improve their style?

Think ahead about the environment you’re going to be in. Are you going to school, or trying to impress someone? But also take into account other factors like the weather and the trek. First and foremost, be comfortable. Don’t walk to the church for Vespers in high heels.

Carry them in a bag and wear your Birkenstocks to get there. Or have your man pick you up in their Subaru. I’d also encourage people to keep a few staple items like the low ankle boots, a blazer jacket, an oversized sweater, and a scarf. These can allow you to go from study night to date night in .05 seconds.

Where are the items in your outfit from?

The sweater and skirt are from a consignment store in Vancouver called Deja Vu, and the red tights are from Fred Meyers’ Black Friday Sock Sale. I “borrowed” the shoes from mom.

Why did you choose this particular outfit? (influenced by the weather, schedule, etc.)

Because I was being interviewed. It’s like going on a date. Gotta dress to impress, but I also want something comfortable. I started with the skirt, and then built around it, adding on the sweater and tights (because winter sucks). Then I finished off with the only pair of shoes that matched the ensemble and allowed me to walk without slipping on ice.

Thinking of Studying Abroad?

CONSIDER THIS...

Stephanie Septembre ACA/SM Writer

F

or all language majors and minors, study abroad is mandatory. For everyone else, study abroad is an option, but it may be a bit trickier to justify the investment to whoever is paying the bills. If you are in that position, intrigued by the idea but not sure it’s worth it, here are a few things you might want to take into account:

1. Studying abroad increases your chances of finding work. According to one study, 97 percent of students who had gone abroad found jobs within 12 months of graduating, compared to 49 percent of those who hadn’t.1 Among study-abroad alumni, 90 percent had found jobs within six months. The students

who went abroad also had higher starting salaries by a whopping 25 percent.

2. Studying abroad enhances school performance. Nearly all who study abroad have higher GPAs after returning to their home university.2 3. Grad schools will love you. Ninety percent of study-abroad alumni were accepted for their first or second choice of grad school.3

4. You will change. That may not always be a good thing (depends on what parents want to hear), but most students would say they come back more mature, focused, open-minded, and perhaps with a better idea of what to do in life.

5. There are many English programs. If you do not want to struggle with a foreign

language, there are many study abroad programs in English which cater to specific interests, such as business, literature, social work, etc. The two best-known programs at Walla Walla University are through Newbold College and Oxford University. Our school is also connected to programs in Australia, Costa Rica, and India through BestSemester and Middlebury.4, 5 6. You will be just as safe—if not safer— than in Walla Walla. I’ve heard students share their concerns—or perhaps more accurately, their parents’ concerns—about the risks of going abroad. In reality, research shows it is safer to study abroad than at your home campus6. Tell your parents that, and they might send you abroad permanently.

7. Studying abroad is probably less expensive than you think. It does depend on the program, but comparing WWU’s tuition at

about $26,000 per year with the most expensive Adventist College Abroad program— Newbold College at $21,000, which includes room and board7—it is actually cheaper than a year at home. Of course, the numbers add up if studying abroad causes you to spend an extra year in school, but oftentimes credits can be counted towards general requirements or other electives. Scholarships may also be available through departments or the government, especially in case of language study, so it’s at least worth investigating your options. Who knows? Your amazing starting salary might balance it out in the end.

1 http://studyabroad.ucmerced.edu/study-abroad-statistics/ statistics-study-abroad 2 Idid.

3 Ibid.

4 https://www.bestsemester.com/locations-and-programs 5 http://www.middlebury.edu/international/sa 6 http://www.goabroad.com/articles/study-abroad/statisticsto-overturn-every-fear-about-studying-abroad 7 http://www.aca-noborders.com/

12

LIFE RELIGION/CREATIVE WRITING

THAT’S MY DAD vixie bailey Religion Writer

T

hat's my dad." If I could convey the depth of love and admiration on the face of the 6-year old camper, I would; but words cannot describe the amount of wonder on Benjamin's1 face knowing that his dad was driving that plane.

It was my last week of camp. Call me crazy, but after working at Alaska Camps for eight weeks, I spent about 10 hours at home and set out for a week of volunteer work at another camp. Wednesday afternoon, we were told that a special activity was happening and to hurry over to the field across camp. We got there just as a plane came into sight.

"That's Benjamin and May’s parents and grandpa in the plane," the director announced, “And they are here to do a prize drop.” Benjamin's eyes got wide as he looked up to the sky. "That's my dad,” he said with pride.

There was a very different scene in my house as a child. We knew that we were supposed to keep the house clean, do our schoolwork, take out the trash, and above all else, wash the dishes. However, somehow we forgot all that, and played Legos all day, hacked the computer password so we could watch movies, and wreaked havoc on our home. And as we lay there relaxing, we would hear the worst sound known to our little ears: the sound of dad’s diesel truck coming up the hill. My dad is an amazing person, and one of my

NO INFO GOES ON THI PEXELS

best friends, but at that moment, we would look at each other, and then at the mess we had made and scream, “DAD’S HOME!!!”

All four children would leap off the couch and run every which way trying to undo a day of damage to the state of our home in the time it took my dad to get out of the truck and cross the lawn to the house.

At the second coming, the Bible makes it plain that there are going to be two groups of people: those waiting, and those hiding. Revelation describes the second group saying, “They called to the mountains and the rocks, “Fall on us and hide us… For the great day of [the Lamb’s] wrath has come, and who can withstand it?”2 Just like my siblings and I, the people who haven’t been following what they

know they are supposed to do aren’t very excited when Jesus comes. The Second Coming will be the most terrible thing to them, even though Jesus loves them too; they will have made their choice, and it was not for Him. The time to act is now. Jesus is coming, and the time to start serving Him isn’t when we see prophecies about the end days fulfilled. The time is now. Today is the day to start building a relationship with Christ. Today is the day to be ready.

When Jesus comes again, I want to be one of the people that looks at the glory of the second coming and says, "That's my Dad." Do you?

The names have been changed.

Rev. 6:16-17

1 2

GET PUBLISHED mac ford Creative Writing Editor

I

t can be difficult to get published in college, but the experience is definitely worth a try! Here are six cool, reputable publications that are open to submissions from us lowly college students. You got this!

1. Local Wolves This internet-kid-era arts magazine has an open submission section in every issue, and they accept both photos and short written pieces (short nonfiction, poems, etc.). I actually submitted a short prose poem and a photo a few months ago, and they got in! (See Issue 43 with my YouTuber hero, Jenn Im, on the cover. So. Exciting.) And if you want to step it up a notch and write a full article, you could even email them a pitch! Local Wolves sometimes announces openings for article and photo spread pitches on their Instagram, so follow them (@localwolves) and keep an eye out for writing opportunities. To see what kind of content they're looking for, or just for a good read, you can check out all of their past issues on issuu.com/localwolves.

2. The Blue Route This national literary journal is open to submissions from undergraduate writers only. They publish short prose and poetry—check out their past issues at https://widenerblueroute.org/issues. Their submission guidelines note that they're looking for "good, highly imaginative writing about contemporary life as you see it."1 Also, they pay $25 for each published piece, which is pretty cool. Their next reading period is Jan. 1 through March 1, 2017, so get on that!

3. Odyssey Rebecca Gibson, the WWU Odyssey’s editor, gave me all the info you need to become a writer (or vlogger!) for Odyssey. To apply, go to https://muse.theodysseyonline. com/apply and fill in your information (make sure to select Walla Walla University for the community) and your preferences on position and content. Odyssey is the perfect place to write and create weekly content about being a millennial—Rebecca suggested topics like politics, gender equality, religion, drugs, and college life. It’s unpaid, but it’s great experience to add to

PEXELS

your resume. I wrote for Odyssey last year and found that it was a great way to gain experience and practice writing with a lot of creative freedom. So if you have lots of ideas, passions, and interests, and you love having space to make those ideas come to life, Odyssey could be the perfect option!

4. Rookie Magazine This goes to say for every publication, but I would especially recommend reading Rookie before submitting—if not for familiarizing yourself with their content, then to bask in the light of this informed, smart, funny, and dazzling online mag. (Side note: check out the Rookie Yearbooks for bound collections of their best pieces!) Rookie generally wants submissions from teenage readers, but they are open to adults' work as well, including "essays, photo sets, collages, poems, short stories,"2 and other projects.

They also feature articles from a wide range of celebrities, such as Mindy Kaling, Lorde, David Sedaris, Ariana Grande, Lena Dunham, Zooey Deschanel, and Joss Whedon. Basically, they are cool at an unparalleled level. Their submission

guidelines are pretty particular, so make sure you read through everything carefully at rookiemag.com/submit!

5. Gadfly Do it! Submit to the Gadfly! It's the perfect chance to get some publishing experience and super convenient to submit—just email your pieces to gadfly@wallawalla.edu.

The theme is Anything Elegant, and that includes everything from poetry and prose to paintings and chemical equations. Plus, if you get in, you’ll get to see your piece (and your name!) in print this year, which feels pretty great.

6. Right here!

Submit your writing to Collegian for a chance to be published in this section. The word limit is 400 words, but if you have something longer that could be split into serial sections, I'd love to read it! Send it all to mackenzie.ford@wallawalla.edu.

https://widenerblueroute.org/submission-guidelines https://rookiemag.com/submit

1 2

IS BLOCK

HUMOR/COLUMN LIFE

13

THE WOMEN’S TANTRUM ON WASHINGTON micah (lahren) hall Humor Writer

I

t is time for people to realize that “protesting” a fair election is nothing more than throwing a temper tantrum when you don’t get what you want. I can’t even go on Facebook without seeing hundreds of pictures and memes from my friends complaining that Donald Trump got more votes than Hillary Clinton.1 It is time for people to admit that this election was fair. There is no evidence of vote tampering. Russia may have done a little bit of hacking, but all they did was give people accurate information. Some people might say it is “treasonous” for me to say this but I am actually happy Russia interfered with our elections. I am tired of crybaby liberals winning so much.

I hate that half2 of our country can’t handle losing. I hate that half of our country is crying about potentially “losing their fundamental rights” when Trump hasn’t even been president for a week yet.

Thankfully, there is hope. We finally have a president who can show those crybaby liberals that throwing a tantrum isn’t how real men3 solve problems.

When someone says something mean about Donald Trump, he doesn’t cry about it. When people don’t like Donald Trump, he doesn’t complain about it on the internet.

Donald Trump just hikes up his suit4 and goes to work.

When SNL made jokes satirizing Trump, he did do a bunch of complaining on Twitter. When you think about it though, that made sense. Complaining is okay if people are mean to you. Trump has the right to expect that people will stop making jokes about him out of respect for the presidency. As you may recall, there were no mean jokes targeted at Obama during his terms in office.

PIXABAY

When Marco Rubio said Trump had small hands, Trump didn’t cry about it.

Instead he went on the stage at a national debate and told the crowd that he actually had very normal sized hands and also normal sized genitals.

This is the difference between Trump and the Women’s March protesters. When Trump is attacked, he handles it with grace.

These protesters were complaining before Trump was even president. I can see why they would be upset if Trump did something

like get rid of the Spanish language option the Whitehouse.gov website or delete the webpage on LGBT worker’s rights, but the protestors were protesting literally hours before Trump did either of those things.

When Trump’s inauguration didn’t have the same attendance as Obama’s in 2008, Trump didn’t complain about it. Instead of complaining that fewer people came to his inauguration, Trump took the high road and got his press secretary to lie about the size of the audience.5 I wish America would wake up and stop being outraged about everything.

Thankfully, America has just got a new role model who can show the American people how to take criticism without blaming everyone but themselves and complaining about it on the internet.

I know he technically got fewer votes from American citizens, but he got many more electoral college votes.

2 I know it is technically it is about 2.5 million more than half.

3 Go men!

4 A classic blue collar billionaire, Donald Trump does not buy suits that fit him. He is just like the rest of us blue collar folks.

5 As Trump advisor Kellyanne Conway later noted, it was not lies. It was actually “alternative facts.”

1

THE GOOD, THE BAD, AND THE UGLY joni harris Column Writer

I

n fourth grade, I learned how to crochet.

Last week, that skill finally came into use. I stitched up a pink cat hat, put on my Hillary buttons, and on Thursday morning flew off to Washington D.C. to protest the presidential inauguration. Here are few of the experiences I had along the way: The Good: I rode metro cars full of pink cat hats and MAGA hats sitting alongside each other, helping each other navigate the system and even laughing with one another.

While in the middle of a protest, an anarchist dressed in a full face mask and all black clothing swung me and my Hillary pins out of the way of a swinging riot shield.

After the inaugural ceremony, a Trump

supporter thanked me for being respectful and not retaliating to any of the pestering I received for my pink cat hat, Hillary pins, and protect immigrants sign.

Riot police, with pepper spray pointed at me, worked hard to keep both the protestors and Trump supporters safe.

Heading back to the airport, a man in Trump, Reagan, and Bush paraphernalia asked me, “Did you have a good day?”

I told him, “Probably not as good as yours, but I did enjoy being part of history.” “Well, I hope you got some good protesting in, everyone’s voice needs to be heard,” he replied.

The Bad: The second that president Trump concluded his speech with “God Bless America,” the crowd jubilantly begin to scatter. I was immediately approached by an elderly man who ripped a “Hillary 2016”

sticker off my purse. A couple college-aged men wearing Trump paraphernalia who were alerted to my presence by a yellow sign on my back reading “Protect immigrants,” then riddled me with questions about my stances on immigration and welfare. I gave them my opinions and the conversation ended in them storming off, declaring that I was “too level-headed” as if that was an insult. I was approached frequently for the rest of the day by people trying to pick fights or just wanting to hurl insults. While waiting along the parade route, men passing by yelled at me, “Liberals, stick together, die together”.

The protesters, largely anarchists, outside the DeploraBall on Thursday night lit fires in street to burn MAGA hats.

The Ugly: Large groups of protestors, women of color, and panhandlers received much worse comments than I did. Often being told

“get off welfare,” or “Trump won’t pay your welfare now.”

During Trump’s speech, the camera panned to a Muslim man in the crowd, and beside me three men in MAGA hats mockingly erupted in laughter. In horrific timing, the next line of Trump’s speech was a promise to wipe radical Islamic terrorists off the face of the earth, inducing even more laughter.

When Bill and Hillary were announced and came out of the Capitol building, the crowd began to boo and chanted “Lock her up”.

On Friday night, the crowd I had been protesting with grew angry after hearing all the climate change and LGBT pages were removed from the White House website.

They began to chant and some attempted to destroy a Trump decorated trailer.

14

NO INFO GOES ON THI

LIFE COLLEGIAN WISDOM/SCIENCE

PIXABAY

COLLEGIAN HOW SENSITIVE TO CAFFEINE ARE YOU? WISDOM jordan brooks Science Writer President Trump loves the “beautiful” White House phones.

Unfortunately, they are too big for his hands.

Trump asks National Park Twitter accounts to stop tweeting scientific facts.

Facts about the large inaugural crowd are both allowed and recommended “1984” is now the top selling book on Amazon.

Trump is already stimulating the economy.

Man claims Google Maps captured him punching an alien in the face.

Richard Spencer says he is offended by the name-calling.

Bristol Police taser their own race relations advisor.

This is not a good sign.

75 year-old Texas woman survives tornado in bathtub.

In other news, 67 year-old Harrison Ford survives a nuclear explosion in a refrigerator.

W

hy can some people throw down upwards of three shots of black espresso and still go to sleep two hours later while others will pull an all-nighter on a creamywhite chai latte? The answer to this question has many parts, including how caffeine acts on the brain, how caffeine is broken down in the liver, and genetic variations. Two terms that are important to define are caffeine tolerance and caffeine sensitivity. Caffeine tolerance is your body making cellular changes such that it responds less strongly to caffeine, so as tolerance increases more caffeine is needed to achieve the same stimulating effect. Caffeine sensitivity is different than tolerance, it refers to one’s genetic make-up and how that translates to caffeine’s effect. For the sake of exploration, we are going to focus on caffeine sensitivity and the specific components that go into making a spectrum of sensitivities to caffeine.1 Caffeine’s journey throughout the body starts with a sip. After enjoying the smells and flavors of a caffeinated beverage, the caffeine is

quickly absorbed through the intestines and is integrated into the bloodstream. Once in the bloodstream, caffeine travels all throughout the body but enacts its effects in the brain. In the brain, neurons are sending signals between one another that determine how the body is going to act. One specific type of signal is sent through the molecule adenosine which binds to adenosine receptors to cause a feeling drowsiness. Because caffeine and adenosine are structurally similar, caffeine blocks adenosine from binding to its receptor which causes increased alertness. However, it appears that variations in the genes that code for adenosine receptors directly lead to a spectrum of sensitivities.

Dr. J. V. Rétey and a team of researchers at the University of Zurich demonstrated that genetic variations of adenosine A2A receptor was correlated to people who self-rate themselves as either being sensitive or insensitive to caffeine.2 In other words, the group of people who rate themselves as sensitive have a different genetic code for adenosine A2A receptor than those who rate themselves as insensitive. In addition, the alteration of sleep recorded in those who rate themselves as sensitive is similar to that of diagnosed insomniacs. Amazingly, a simple change of one amino acid (cysteine

to threonine) in the adenosine A2A receptor protein sequence leads to caffeine binding and blocking adenosine from transmitting its “drowsy” signal more effectively.

While caffeine is circulating around the body and affecting the brain, it is also passing through the liver where it is being broken down into other molecules. Caffeine binds to an enzyme called cytochrome P450 1A2 (CYP1A2) which catalyzes its transformation into paraxanthine, removing it from the bloodstream. There are a wide variety of genetic variations of CYP1A2 in a population and the rate at which caffeine is removed from the body can vary 40-fold between individuals.3 In other words, CYP1A2 determines how long caffeine is in the body, and people who metabolize caffeine slowly have an increased length of caffeine stimulation. A standard way to measure the effectiveness of CYP1A2 is through a paraxanthine/caffeine ratio which compares the concentration of paraxanthine and caffeine in blood. The higher the ratio, the better CYP1A2 is converting caffeine into paraxanthine. A study completed by Roza Gohtbi and her colleagues in Sweden, found that Swedes on average have a higher paraxanthine/caffeine ratio than Koreans due to a version of CYP1A2 that is found in Swedish but not Korean populations.4 The genetic differences that lead to differences in the way caffeine acts on the brain and is metabolized by the liver make generalizing its effects on populations difficult.

Whether you find yourself to be caffeine sensitive or ins ensitive, the underlying mechanisms that lead to this qualitative assessment are many-fold. As we seem to continuously find in the exploration of new information and technology, things aren’t always black and white.

Caffeine Tolerance and Causes. Caffeineinformer.

Accessed 01/22/2017. http://www.caffeineinformer.com/ caffeine-tolerance 2 Retey, J.V. et al. A Genetic Variation in the Adenosine A2A Receptor Gene (ADORA2A) Contributes to Individual Sensitivity to Caffeine Effects on Sleep. Clinical Pharmacology and Therapeutics. 28 February 2007. 2007 May; 81: 692–698. doi: 10.1038/sj.clpt.6100102 3 Yang, A. et. al. Genetics of caffeine consumption and responses to caffeine. Psychopharmacology (Berl). 2010 Aug; 211(3): 245–257. 2010 Jun 9. doi: 10.1007/s00213010-1900-1 4 Ghotbi, R., Christensen, M., Roh, HK. et al. Comparisons of CYP1A2 genetic polymorphisms, enzyme activity and the genotype-phenotype relationship in Swedes and Koreans. J Clin Pharmacol (2007) 63: 537. doi:10.1007/ s00228-007-0288-2 1

IS BLOCK

CULTURE/FOOD LIFE

15

WHAT SHOULD WE LEAVE BEHIND IN 2016?

darling su Culture Writer

A

s much as 2016 was an interesting year, there are many things that hopefully will gradually become a distant memory.

Will 2017 offer something better? With just four weeks into the year we’ve already established some popular topics, such as: memes featuring Joe Biden and Obama; the Salt Bae—a video where a Turkish cook elegantly sprinkles salt over his chopped steak; the return of Game of Thrones; and of course Star Wars Episode VIII. But let’s talk about 2016. Here are some trends and topics I think would be better left buried and forgotten.

• “Closer” by the Chainsmokers At first, you thought it could potentially be a good song, until the radio decided to play it twice every hour. Just like any other overplayed song, no matter how hard you try, you know every single word.

• Everything Kardashian Whether they deserve the fame or not, the family surely gets the attention they want. We hate them or love them, but at the end of the day we continue to Keep Up with the Kardashians.

• Dabbing Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’re aware of the dabbing sensation on social media. Just like the Nae Nae

dance, hip hop artists featured the dance move in their music videos. It soon became a viral sensation once Cam Newton started doing it. Even Hillary Clinton gave it a chance on “The Ellen DeGeneres Show.” But thankfully, most of the world has moved on.

• Rainbow food The year of rainbow food, from bagels to grilled cheese and pizza. It may look beautiful, but it is packed with artificial food dyes. Other than a sugar rush and a cute Instagram picture, these foods bring nothing new to the table. Let’s keep the colors to nature instead of food dye.

• Every Single Viral Challenge Water bottle flipping, the mannequin challenge, the running man challenge, the backpack challenge, the hot pepper challenge, the list goes on. People come up with all sorts of ways to kill time, we don’t know exactly where they start, but as always, the internet does not fail to keep us entertained.

• The Rise of Fake News Fake News stories were particularly prevalent during the U.S. presidential election. It was a roller-coaster year for news; the involvement of social media led to the spread of many fabricated stories. Therefore, it’s important to consider the source and accuracy of your articles, because most credible articles won’t come off of Facebook.

GRAZE, A STUDENT FAVORITE Mason Neil Food Writer

background of the food industry and customer service. This past year they ended their catering operations, and are now focusing on sandwich market domination.

One of my favorite things about Graze is their seasonal menu items. Walla Walla has a rich agricultural community, and to not include the seasonal produce items in our

O

ne of my close friends won’t stop talking about Graze. Perhaps we all have that one friend who’s obsessed with that specific food or restaurant. If your experience is anything like mine, you’ve realized that the only way to get them to stop is to put food in their mouth. I don’t have strong feelings about the establishment, so after my friend berated me to go and do a dish comparison with them, I relented.

Graze has done incredibly well in the Walla Walla valley since starting as a catering business in 2006, and has also opened additional locations in Kennewick and Richland. I owe a bit of debt to Graze, as my job working for their catering business was my first introduction to the

MASON NEIL

region’s menus is a missed opportunity. Two weeks ago Graze introduced a new sandwich to their menu, the “CCB,” or Cauliflower/ Carrot/Butternut. Similar to the butternut squash panini, this sandwich stands out with a striking addition of the roasted cauliflower and a delightful muhammara schmeer served on the side. Muhammara is a spread made of red peppers and walnuts that originates from Aleppo, Syria, a city that has seen plenty of headlines in the past several years. If you’re scared of spice, Graze’s interpretation of the schmeer is a mellow rendition that adds a subtle kick to the laid back butternut squash and carrot.

Sandwiches are usually a solid meal choice, and Graze is consistent at delivering delicious sandwiches made with top-notch bread and great ingredients.

If you want to grab some for lunch and are worried about timing, order ahead at grazeplaces.com.

SIDE

SUNNY

P

KANYE WEST CONTEXT

HOW TO MAKE SOME EXTRA CA$H* *without breaking the law or anything lauren wahlen Backpage Writer

I

have a love-hate relationship with Thursdays...as in, I love 'em when I get paid, and I hate 'em when I don’t. The bi-weekly struggle is real. Week One, I’m living like a queen. 1 Week Two, I’m trying to convince myself that the expired protein bars in my cupboard don’t taste that bad. It’s rough times in these streets. And since I know I’m not the only one with financial probs (I see all y’alls cards declinin’ at the DX), I’ll share my money making ideas with you guys. Feel free to thank me in diamonds once these strategies make you wealthier than a Kennedy eating caviar on a yacht.2 Uh huh huh huh (that’s my “rich person laugh” fyi).

Sell your eggs: I realize that this seems a little extreme, but think about it: you lose an egg a month anyway, so why not get paid for them? My friend’s cousin legit paid off her student loans by selling eggs. Sure, it’s kinda extreme and I heard it may or may not “wreck your body” temporarily, but still. Think of the money, honey! Note: if you’re wondering how someone’s body could get wrecked by selling chicken eggs, just forget this section and skip to #2. Males, amiright?3 eBay: Toy Story is all lies, and despite what your heart may tell you, your toys don’t have feelings. They don’t love you. But you know who does? Middle-aged women on eBay. Don’t ask me why, but they’ll buy anything.

I had to stay home from my practicum in Kennewick for two days in a row thanks to the snowpocalypse, and after three whole hours of doing nothing, I started going stir crazy and started selling all my stuff. American Girl with hair partly chopped off ?4 Sold. Slightly crunchy hand-me-down dress with no tags?

Sold. I’m telling you, if you put anything up for sale and write “smoke-free environment” in the description, they. will. buy. it.

Costco: Costco is the place where dreams are realized, including the dreams you didn’t even know you had. You want it? They’ve got it: great customer service, good prices, never-ending piles of sweatpants, all-you-can-eat samples, 5 the list goes on. But I just learned something even more amazing: they let you return almost anything. My brother-in-law told us that he once saw this super old guy return a TV that was over 10 years old. His only argument was that it “just stopped working”, and they still refunded him. Amazing. So basically I’m saying, if you’re in need of some quick cash, 6 try to return your stuff from Costco that you don’t really need. It might not work, but hey, it’s worth looking like a fool, IMHO. Grandmas: I was asking my friends how I could make some extra money, and while some of them were less than helpful,7 a few told me about the easy money to be made by cleaning old ladies houses in the community. Apparently they pay pretty well, and if you do a good job, they’ll usually tell their friends. You could have a whole network of grannies, and do you know what that means? A whole network of free cookies, fresh bread, and other baked goods. I am so down. 8 1 And by “queen”, I mean that I can afford Walmart groceries #greatvalueismybrand.

2 In this future, I’m still a social worker, but somehow also a millionaire. I realize this is a fairly unheard of combo, but hey miracles happen.

3 I was talking about this with a friend, and after a good three minutes her boyfriend was all, “Wait, what? I thought you were talking about chickens.”

4 I used to want to be a hairstylist, what can I say?

5 You just have to be sneaky, that’s all.

6 My friend just told me a few days ago that she’s getting married in less than a month, so you know I’ma be trying this out right away. Plane tickets don’t buy themselves.

7 No, I’m not going to harvest my friends’ kidneys and sell them on the black market, my word.

8 “Man shall not live by bread alone," but I think I honestly could if I was just given a chance.

TWO TRUTHS

& A LIE

Last week’s lie: “The Express used to be a bar”

You should know the drill by now, but just in case you’re not a ~dedicated backpage reader~ (Lol jk I only have one, aka my editor), I’ll catch you up: I’ve written two truths and one lie about dear old WWU. The first student to email the lie to lauren.wahlen@wallawalla.edu gets ww a free Atlas drink card to get some #coffree. Get it? Haaaaa.

The campus tennis courts used to be where the University Church is now.

The campus pool used to be in between where Bowers Hall and the custodial offices are now.

The social work office building used to be where the Atlas is now.

VERBATIM “I want to be like Jesus. Jesus was always eating and feeding people. I want to be like Jesus.”

- Professor Pedrito Maynard-Reed “That’s why I study fish. People are constantly disappointing you, now FISH are reliable.”

- Monty Buell Email me at lauren.wahlen@wallawalla.edu if you hear a staff/faculty member say anything hilarious, scandalous, or just plain weird. I know it’s hard to pay attention in class, but do it for this section. Do it for the backpage. Do it for the Vine. (RIP Vine)

FOLLOW THE COLLEGIAN ON

3