Volume 97, Issue 1 by The Collegian

27 September 2012 Volume 97 Issue 1

AT ODDS WITH

PERSPECTIVE 5

2 EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

Emily Muthersbaugh

INTRODUCTION

HEAD LAYOUT EDITOR Ricky Barbosa HEAD COPY EDITOR Cedric Thiel

Emily Muthersbaugh

HEAD PHOTO EDITOR Josh McKinney CONTENT DIRECTOR Philip Duclos

Editor-in-Chief

NEWS EDITOR Jaclyn Archer RELIGION EDITORS Rob Folkenberg Nick Ham COLUMNIST Rebecca Brothers CREATIVE WRITING EDITOR Kayla Albrecht OPINION EDITORS Elliott Berger Grant Gustavsen FEATURE EDITORS Elizabeth Jones James Mayne Christian Robins Braden Anderson CULTURE EDITOR Grant Perdew

On behalf of the Collegian staff, I want to welcome you to a new school year and to a new edition of our weekly student publication. As the official publication of ASWWU, The Collegian seeks to present relevant information, foster thoughtful discussion, and provide genuine entertainment to our campus community. We will endeavor to offer objective news stories, diverse opinions, and features to enrich student life.

Additionally, we will seek to be a safe place for members of this community to express their opinions and explore their beliefs. As members of the Walla Walla University community ourselves, we will seek to uphold its mission as “a community of faith and discovery committed to: excellence in thought, generosity in service, beauty in expression, and faith in God.”

broader thematic categories. First, you will find Context, covering events both in our local and wider community. Next, Perspective explores just that — perspectives on issues relevant to the student body. Then, in our new Feature section, writers examine relevant topics in depth to both enhance and challenge our understanding of these topics. Finally, Life follows the everyday interests and activities that enrich student life. Earlier this week, I sat down with our WWU President Elect, Dr. John McVay, and asked him about his decision to return to WWU for another term, starting Jan. 1. I was encouraged by his reflection on his past presidency and his dedication to future improvement. I urge you take the time to read his interview in this week’s issue.

When you read through The Collegian, you will notice that it is organized into

DIVERSIONS EDITOR Eric Weber TRAVEL EDITOR Megan Cleveland HEALTH & WELLNESS EDITOR Karl Wallenkampf SCIENCE & TECHNOLOGY EDITOR Spencer Cutting FOOD EDITOR Amy Alderman SPORTS EDITORS Trevor Boyson Tye Forshee BACKPAGE EDITOR Julian Weller STAFF WRITERS Amy Alderman Annie Palumbo Liz Pham Danni Shepherd LAYOUT DESIGNERS Allison Berger Alix Harris Greg Khng Cory Sutton COPY EDITORS Amy Alderman Rebecca Brothers Carly Leggitt Ryan Robinson DISTRIBUTION MANAGER Alex Wickward OFFICE MANAGER Heather Eva SPONSOR Don Hepker EDITORIAL BOARD Emily Muthersbaugh Philip Duclos James Mayne Elizabeth Jones Rob Folkenberg Elliott Berger Grant Gustavsen

Photo by Josh McKinney

Context

Photo by Briana Chapman

3–7

General News ASWWU/Admin School News Week in Review Week in Forecast

Perspective Scholars Abroad Opinion Religion Creative Writing Snapshots Column

Photo by DA user Thundertori

8–13

Feature 14–17 At Odds with Perspective

Photo by Amy Alderman

Life 18–23

Culture Diversions Travel Health and Wellness Foodie Sports

Our staff works hard each week to deliver new and relevant content. If you are interested in contributing to The Collegian, I would encourage you to contact our page editors or myself as our publication is boosted by regularly incorporating a wide range of student perspective. Credit for Cover Photos: Anthony White, Josh McKinney, Josh McKinney, and Darin Berning, respectively. The Collegian is the official publication of ASWWU. Its views and opinions are not necessarily the official stance of Walla Walla University or its administration, faculty, staff, or students. Questions, letters, and comments can be mailed to aswwu.collegian@wallawalla.edu or emily.muthersbaugh@wallawalla.edu.

The Collegian | Volume 97, Issue 1 | 204 S. College Avenue | College Place, WA 99324 | collegian.wallawalla.edu

GENERAL NEWS

WELCOME BACK BASH 2012 Liz Pham

Staff Writer

Last Sunday, Sept. 23, the Welcome Back Bash was held in the WEC softball field to welcome old and new students, faculty, and staff to campus. This is a yearly event that provides a chance for students to sign up for clubs and activities, win great prizes, and to come away thoroughly enjoying themselves. According to Don Hepker, director of student activities, the Welcome Back Bash had been an annual event for nearly 30 years. The purpose of this event, he said, was to, “Let students know what they can do on campus, how they can develop their talents and leadership, as well as to give local businesses an opportunity to introduce themselves to the students.” Every year the Welcome Back Bash attracts about 1,200 to 1,500 visitors, including students, faculty, staff, family members, and people in the community. It has been held in the gym and on the track field in the past, and then it was moved to the softball field when the light system was installed. Since then, unless the weather was bad, this event has always been held on the softball field. This year, the Welcome Back Bash started at 6 p.m. and lasted for two hours, just enough time for visitors to check out ap-

proximately 80 booths presented. Each booth was decorated by different clubs and characterized the club it represented. These booths were set up on the day of the celebration, but the spots had been reserved ahead of time. Some reservations even dated back to May 2012.

Out of 80 booths, many could be divided into four categories: clubs sponsored by different academic departments, clubs catered to the spiritual need, clubs devoted to community service, and clubs created for those of various interests. Most of these clubs have been run by student leaders for years, but this year, new clubs also successfully drew the attention of visitors. As there were clubs letting students indulge in their hobbies, there were also clubs and programs that gave students opportunities to serve the community. Club HOPE (Helping Our People Excel) organized activities to raise community awareness of disabilities and services provided. His Kids in Action encouraged club members to create vespers for children. An ABC school– based program gave students a chance to assist teaching elementary schoolers. Beside clubs and programs focusing on hobby and community services, clubs supported by different academic disciplines were also very popular. There were a variety of clubs, ranging from the Pre-Professional Club to the History Club, from Pegasus Club (sponsored by the English department) to clubs sponsored by the engineer-

ing department such as ASCE, ASME, SWE, and EWB. This year, instead of continuing to build classrooms in Honduras as in previous years, Engineers Without Borders club decided to have projects of different levels: local, national, and international. One of their possible projects was to build a library or computer lab in Honduras. Besides clubs run by WWU students, local businesses were also interested in the Welcome Back Bash. Participants included clothing and gear shops such as Dusty’s, boarding equipment shops such as Lost, and food services like Blue Palm. Many of these businesses hold a spot in the Welcome Back Bash annually, for this is a great way to familiarize themselves students with themselves. At the Welcome Back Bash, students could sign up to be member of their favorite clubs. If they needed time to decide or missed the chance to sign up for any reason, it is also possible to sign up later by finding club officers and having them add their names to the member list, or by sending an email to Don Hepker at don.hepker@wallawalla.edu, stating their names, ID numbers, clubs, and amount of dues. It is also possible to discontinue membership by having a club officer cross off one’s name. The deadline to sign up for clubs is two weeks from the Welcome Back Bash.

WEEK OF WORSHIP, WoW! Liz Pham

Staff Writer

Next week, Oct. 1–5, is the Week of Worship with the theme Jesus.All. During this week, there will be CommUnity every day from 11:40 a.m to 12:30 p.m., where the students can get CommUnity credit. According to Paddy McCoy, WWU campus chaplain, Week of Worship “gives us a chance as a community to come together

and focus on Jesus instead of our studies and the busyness of life … It also helps us set the tone for the year on a strong spiritual focus. And what’s a better focus than Jesus. All.?” This year, some of the WoW speakers are part of the core leadership team of the One Project, which is a movement of people who wish to celebrate the supremacy of Jesus Christ in the Seventh-day Adventist Church. These speakers come from many SDA colleges.

Also, on Tuesday, Oct. 2, the first Areopagus, a bi-weekly program to create a safe place for discussions about the meaning of following Jesus in today culture, will be held in the Prayer House. The first Areopagus discussion will follow the theme Jesus.All., and there will be CommUnity credit given.

CONTEXT

THOUSAND Dead in Syria from the 18-month rebellion against Assad

Percentage of people who read a newspaper this week

534

New students at Walla Walla University

908

Nigerian women detained in Saudi Arabia in poor conditions for traveling without a male relative

BY THE NUMBERS

CONTEXT

There is always excitement about something new. One of the new items in this Collegian is the ASWWU/Admin Page. This page was created because some of us in student leadership saw the need for transparency in what happens on campus. Walla Walla University is blessed to have a strong body of student leadership which interacts well with a strong administration. Although there are many positive results of this collaboration, students do not always have a good knowledge of what is happening with campus leadership. This page aims to increase dialogue on campus, leading to a better mutual understanding between the leaders and the led. There will be opportunities to read about administrators and student leadership throughout the year. There will be opportunities to read about bills being passed which affect students. And there will be opportunities to promote discussion between faculty, staff, and students. We will be providing weekly senate updates in this sidebar to let you know what bills are being put through by your senators so you can contact them and provide valuable feedback. Through the year, we hope you will be enlightened by this page. It is our hope that you will become more involved with what is going on on campus and be encouraged that you can make a difference through ASWWU in the lives of your fellow students.

STAY INFORMED

ASWWU NEWS

MEET THE ASWWU EXECUTIVE TEAM PRESIDENT Emily Oliver Class Standing: Graduating Senior Major: Speech Communication Minor: Psychology Home Town: Sacramento, Calif.

“I listen to what the students want and do my best to deliver it to them with the help of my team.”

EXECUTIVE VICE PRESIDENT Jason Birkenstock Class Standing: Graduating Senior Major: Business Management & Finance Home Town: Sacramento, Calif.

“I preside over student senate, which is one of the most effective resources for a student who wishes to impact campus and help ASWWU to function as smoothly and effectively as possible.”

SOCIAL VICE PRESIDENT

Doug Wheeler

Class Standing: Graduating Senior Major: Business Administration Home Town: Sandpoint, Idaho

“We create environments that enable more people to get to know each other and to remember all of the good times at WWU.”

SPIRITUAL VICE PRESIDENT Matthew Randall Class Standing: Senior Major: Religious Studies Minor: Physical Education Home Town: Redlands, Calif.

“I’m in charge of student Week of Worship winter quarter, ASWWU Battleground, concerts, community outreach, agape feasts, and more.”

FINANCIAL VICE PRESIDENT Jono Pratt Class Standing: Senior Major: Accounting & Pre–Physical Therapy Home Town: Paradise, Calif.

“My department is in charge of managing the ASWWU budget, employment and timecards, and The Atlas.”

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Ca they lapto more

COLUMNS AND CREATIVE WRITING

CONTEXT

THE REBUILDING OF A COMMUNITY Danni Shepherd

Staff Writer

Engineers Without Borders is a club dedicated to “assisting in developing communities worldwide with their selfidentified engineering challenges,” but many students have the misconception that you have to be an engineering student to be a member. However, there are members from a variety of departments other than engineering, from math to humanities, involved in the club. Recently, a group of eight EWB members — five students and three sponsors — made a trip for six to eight weeks to Honduras to assist in the rebuilding of parts of Nueva Suyapa and Santa Ana, which were devastated by Hurricane Mitch in 1998. Since then, the projects that EWB has been helping with are improving inadequate sanitation, expanding an elementary school, and developing a public health program,

just to name a few. They have been working to accomplish this $50,000 project since 2010, and plan to do so in phases over the next five years. The most recent phase of this project has been working on assisting to expand the local elementary school, so that it may accommodate students from kindergarten through, possibly, ninth grade and up. Currently students who are entering the ninth grade have to travel to the nextclosest town for school. This relocation has forced their families to move closer to the new school and to find new housing and new jobs and has caused great difficulties for these already poor families. Their current purpose for being in this tiny city of only 200–300 homes is to assist in Photo by Josh McKinney the building of this expansion. With this being such an important project, they have to find the least expensive, yet strongest, method of construction. With the help of locals, EWB members were able to find the needed components

to ensure sturdy materials that the local residents will be able to repair in case of another natural disaster, such as a hurricane. Though this is an expensive project, all the money was raised with the help of individual donations as well as donations from local College Place and Walla Walla businesses. The support EWB has given the local Hondurans in accomplishing smaller tasks has encouraged, motivated, and reminded them of the importance of completing all the tasks at hand within a limited time frame. Many locals have shown their support and devotion to finish this building project to expand the school to accomodate everyone, from local children as young as seven years old to adults. Many even continued to work their regular jobs while helping with the construction. The children were extremely helpful in the project, giving them the ability to say, “I helped with building our school.”

stated WWU engineering student Alex Clouzet, when asked about his experience in Honduras. Many of the students who assisted in this project felt similarly. In order to raise the money for this project many students even had family and friends donate however much they could spare. Engineering student Bryce Hill stated, “It’s a real experience,” referring not only to the trip earlier this month, but also having to raise the money for it. EWB still needs help with funding and more student involvement. EWB is still looking for students in English, Spanish, business, graphic design, nursing, education, and more who are willing to lend a hand in helping out with future projects. In the opinion of EWB members Clouzet and Hill, “There is no other club that anyone, project-scale wise, could compare to EWB.” Many members and students that know about the work EWB does would agree that the work they do is a worthy cause in helping people worldwide rebuild their communities.

“It’s more meaningful than homework.”

The members of EWB who are Walla Walla University students were extremely excited and satisfied with the work that they had accomplished while in Honduras. “It’s more meaningful than homework,”

For more information on EWB’s recent project, visit ewb-wwu.org/blog.

IMPROVEMENTS UNDERWAY ON CAMPUS Amy Alderman

Staff Writer

The Peterson Memorial Library completed phase one of the “Refresh Project” this summer in the lobby. In addition to new light fixtures and paint colors, the ceiling has been completely redone and new furnishings are on order. Carolyn Gaskell, director of libraries, says they are working toward putting in more laptop outlets and are discussing placing more desktop computers in the building.

New windows will also be installed shortly, and a card access system will be fitted at the front doors, potentially extending evening hours.

The first phase of renovations in the WEC has also been completed, including expanded public restroom and locker room facilities, a new family bathroom, and a larger custodial storage and work area. Additionally, Following phases several new pieces of cardio of the library project equipment will be arriving are estimated to be in the Fitness Center shortly, completed by the and racquetball courts Photo by Josh McKinney end of December three and four have been and include updates repainted. in the reference room, south reading room, periodicals room, and a new technology group-study area.

Rodd Strobel, instructor and HPE facility manager, says, “The administration

is serious about improving opportunities for fitness in order to ensure a dynamic and vibrant future for recreation on this campus.”

College Place’s Whitman Drive project was completed in mid-June and the city plans to paint traffic lines and crosswalks shortly. The city has also proposed a one-totwo year reconstruction project of College Avenue and Rose Street, which may begin as soon as 2013 if passed.

CONTEXT

WEEK IN

REVIEW Photo Katie Palumbo

Photo Joshua McKinney

JumpStart

Welcome Back Bash

16–22 Sept.

23 Sept.

Four hundred and twenty-three new students began JumpStart Sunday, Sept. 16, beginning their transition between high school or transferring to the WWU campus. After settling in to the dormitories, students went to social mixers and sat in on workshops designed to help them succeed in college.

WWU clubs and local businesses set up booths in the WEC softball field as new and returning students socialized, signed up for clubs of their choosing, and received giveaways from various organizations.

Photo Josh McKinney

John McVay’s CommUnity Speech 25 Sept. The University Church was packed full of students, faculty, and staff as President McVay delivered an inspirational speech entitled “Truth is Tough” at the Convocation CommUnity. Photo Erik Sanders

CONTEXT

WEEK IN

FORECAST Photo Brad Lalonde

Photo Anthony White

Thursday | 27 SEPT.

Friday | 28 SEPT.

Saturday | 29 SEPT.

World Tourism Day

ASWWU Agape Feast

The Longest Table

Vespers with Paddy McCoy

Faculty Organ Recital: Kraig Scott

Multnomah vs. WWU Women’s Volleyball 6 p.m. Winter Educational Complex

6 p.m. Kretschmar Lawn

8 p.m. Walla Walla University Church

Photo Katie Palumbo

Photo Allison Berger

1:15 p.m. College Avenue

8 p.m. Walla Walla University Church

Photo Allison Berger

Sunday | 30 SEPT.

Monday | 1 OCT.

Tuesday | 2 OCT.

Wednesday | 3 OCT.

World Heart Day

WoW: Sam Leonor

WoW: Tim Gillespie

WoW: Lisa Clark-Diller

Mudbowl

10 a.m. for AGA 12 p.m. for OPS Walla Walla Valley Academy

11:40 a.m. Walla Walla University Church

LLU School of Medicine Interest Session 6 p.m. Rigby Hall 112

11:40 a.m. Walla Walla University Church

Presidential Debate 6–7:30 p.m. Major News Networks

PERSPECTIVE

SCHOLARS ABROAD

THREE SIGNS YOU AREN’T IN AMERICA ... Katie Palumbo Kenya 1. Within minutes of leaving the Jomo Kenyatta airport in Nairobi I realized that the rules of the road, or perhaps the lack thereof, are very different in Kenya. Here, the most aggressive driver wins. If you can manage not to get stuck behind a matatu, avoid hitting one of the many donkeys, and remember where the plethora of speed bumps are, you are a champion. 2. Another thing that became apparent was that being white, and female to boot, meant that for the next ten months, open mouthed stares and people calling out “Mzungu!” as we passed would become just another part of life. We make ourselves laugh when all eight SMs are together by yelling back “No! Wazungus!” In other words, “There is more than one white person here!” Along with my favorite sweater and some shoes I really wish I had, I apparently should have left my space bubble at home as well.

Mary Castrejon Egypt 1. There is no working trash disposal system. Trash is EVERYWHERE! 2. All the women in sight were wearing veils, burkas, or hijabs. 3. Every four hours, mosques blare the call to prayer as loud as their speakers permit. Photo by Kate Palumbo

Austin Short Egypt 1. The fastest way to your destination is the right way. This may include driving on the wrong side of the road, weaving in and out of traffic, and incessant honking.

3. The first trip to the market was enough for me to learn that if you can’t count neck hairs on the persons neck in front of you, you aren’t standing close enough. As different as everything is here, I love it. Each day is an adventure just waiting to happen. Embracing differences is what this year is all about. Photo by Austin Short

2. You are your own garbage service. Acceptable disposal can include burning your trash in the street or just throwing it in the closest river. 3. A college student is rich. Custom tailored garments for $25. Hallelujah for exchange rates.

Briana Chapman Thailand 1. I started sweating through every orifice on my body the instant I walked out of the airport.

Justin Walker Australia

2. Frequent comparisons to American celebrities: Even if we look nothing alike, we apparently look alike to them!

1. Everyone drives on the wrong side of the road.

3. Things such as squatting for toilets and showering with friendly geckos and cockroaches become normal.

3. Everyone sounds like Crocodile Dundee.

2. The power outlets are all weird.

Photo by Briana Chapman

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OPINIONS

PERSPECTIVE

WWU SPACE PROGRAM Elliott Berger Opinion Editor

Welcome and welcome back to Walla Walla University! For those of you who aren’t familiar with this quaint little town, the sunsets are beautiful, the onions are delightful, and the people are easily both. Rest assured knowing that during the scorching summers and bittercold winters you may simply kick back in your dorm room and continue studying diligently, undisturbed by the horrors these harsh seasons bring in. Until next year, of course, when you can’t focus on school work due to the incessant tapping on your window from the many shivering freshman camped out on the grass. After all, the dorms are packed full. What is Walla Walla University to do? With an 11.3-percent increase over last year’s freshman enrollment,

the university’s numbers are close to overflowing. If the future holds an incoming class of greater or equal size to this year’s, you can expect difficulty in finding free space in your dorms and classes. It would be practical to cap the school’s enrollment so that money, space, and time could be used for other causes, but I don’t believe that role should suit an Adventist university. As a Christian school we should openly accept any applicants who desire a Christian education. With Walla Walla holding one of the few Northwest-area Adventist schools, the importance of maintaining a consistent enrollment rate is essential in regard to our university’s growth, and with it the growth of our church and its teachings. In my opinion, WWU should invest interest in a NASA (New Adventist Space Accommodations) program where either the eligibility requirements for off-campus living would be lessened,

or the university would work out practical living situations for overflow students. If the university allowed for more students to take village housing, the number of dorm vacancies would sustain the future freshman classes while increasing enrollment as a whole. Of course, the planning for such a project is an exhaustive effort, but the closing of the school’s doors to new applicants upon over-enrollment would be a tragic solution to a problem perhaps fixed by seeking sources of alternative living before the calendar chimes September 2013. The question of whether or not to fill the school with so many students is enigmatically difficult to answer. There are simply too many factors to take into account for a “perfect answer.” Despite the number of students accepted or denied, the need for more teachers and space will always be changing accordingly. Adjustments will be made constantly and

both capping enrollment and registering more students hold many risks. So why not continue accepting more students, adding both potential and funds to the school’s projects? If plans for WWU’s growth are in the future, then nothing should delay the process of obtaining more housing for current and incoming students while the logistics of classes and finance are worked out along the way. I believe it could safely be called “worth the risk.” I have hope that Walla Walla University will continue its recruitment efforts as fervently as in the past, doing everything possible to attract students, teachers, and supporters, forever fighting the need for increased space along the way. I would hope that the university would, by whatever means necessary, promote the increased growth of enrollment and increase the academic and spiritual missions of Seventh-day Adventist higher education.

CAPPING GROWING PAINS Grant Gustavsen

Opinion Editor

Over the past few years, Walla Walla University has experienced a steady, systematic growth of students. Increasingly larger classes of freshmen, mixed with higher retention rates and greater numbers of transfer students, have led to a growing enrollment. This growth continued into this year, with a record number of students (423) attending JumpStart, which is up from last year’s record of 380. This year’s freshman class, expected to be between 390 and 400, is the largest class in recent history, and is an increase of 30 to 40 students over last year’s freshman class. In addition, last year’s graduating senior class was significantly smaller than the number of students coming in, and freshman retention rates appear to be at an all-time high. Growth is wonderful

for the university and for the mission of Adventist education, but it presents certain challenges: Dorms are at capacity, classes are full, and the cafeteria is crowded. I’m certain you’re all tired of waiting over a half hour for your daily wrap. While there should be a long-term plan that allows for a steady and healthy growth of students, capping the enrollment is the best solution to these emerging problems. This would solve the issue of overfilled onand off-campus housing, keep class sizes small, maintain the intimate setting that is so valuable to the students and faculty, and add a dimension of prestige to the university’s reputation. This year, men’s and women’s dorms are overfilling, to the point where the fourth floor of Meske Hall was planned to be opened to women, and storage rooms in Foreman and Conard have been converted to residence rooms. Village housing is also at capacity, and for the first time in

recent history, Village Life is allowing three students to an apartment. To avoid an overflow of students, the only logical solution for the time being is for the university to put a limit on how many students can attend. There is only so much housing available in the valley, and until more dormitories and housing can be built, renovated, or expanded (which I believe should be a priority), there must be a limit. One of Walla Walla University’s greatest assets is its intimate campus setting. Small class sizes and on-campus residences have created a tight-knit community of students. In order to handle additional students, the university may be forced to allow more students to live off campus, which could be harmful to an institution that has established itself as a residence campus. Capping enrollment would allow the administration to have a better idea of what to expect year to year for budgeting and academic planning. Rather than

scrambling to find last-minute contract teachers to meet the needs created by largerthan-expected classes, more attention can be focused on ensuring the highest-quality permanent teaching staff that can fully cover a comprehensive curriculum for the anticipated student population. A common perception is that it’s more difficult to gain admission to a prestigious university. By capping enrollment, WWU would have the opportunity to position itself as the Adventist university of choice for students with high academic achievements. It’s important that the university does everything that it can in order to comfortably accommodate more students and keep up with demand. But for the time being, capping enrollment is an essential step that should be taken in order to preserve the environment that is necessary for outstanding Adventist higher education.

PERSPECTIVE

Question “Why hasn't Jesus come back yet?”

RELIGION

WELCOME

Response The timing of the return of Jesus has captivated Bible believers, especially Seventh-day Adventists, since Jesus ascended to heaven (Acts 1:11). The apostles Peter and Paul, and the gospel writers, seemed certain that Jesus would be gone from them just a “little while” (John 16:16; 1 Cor. 1:7). Yet when Jesus spoke about his return, he seemed to leave his followers puzzled about how all the pieces of the “parousia” (second coming) fit together (Matt. 24:3). Still today, Adventists discuss the notion of a delay in the return of Jesus who promised to come back “soon” for his committed disciples (John 14:1–3, Rev. 22:12, 26). Apparently, Jesus was sufficiently vague for a reason in describing his return. He told the twelve that the exact moment of his return was known only by God the Father (Matt. 24:36). While Christ's followers have waited and debated for some two thousand years about when Jesus would fulfill that glorious promise, the counsel of Ellen G. White also pricks our conscience: “It is the unbelief, the worldliness, unconsecration, and strife among the Lord’s professed people that have kept us in this world of sin and sorrow so many years” (Manuscript 4, 1883). Not only will the gospel go to the whole world before Jesus returns (Matt. 24:14), but members of his church will clearly reflect the grace and love of Jesus toward one another. — Pastor Phil Muthersbaugh

Have—a Pastor good question? Email us at Troy Fitzgerald robert.folkenberg@wallawalla.edu

REAL QUESTIONS

Rob Folkenberg

Religion Co-Editor

Nick Ham

Hello! Welcome to a page of dynamic discussion regarding things that are important. Welcome to a page where questions can be asked and hard topics discussed, where religious news and relevant church issues will be explored. It’s here that new ideas for church and worship will be considered, honest reflections shared, and a real live religion tackled head-on. It’s where this campus can discuss, in print and online, things that matter.

A SUMMER CANVASSING Nathan Stratte “I have no idea why I’m doing this,” I thought, dragging my hand up to knock on a stranger’s door. It was the first door of a summer colporteuring and any excitement for the summer had vanished. Faced with this task — honey-oak colored and unbelievably frightening — I thought about turning around, scampering home with my book bag between my legs, and hiding for the rest of the summer. I didn’t. Prayers were answered every day. Ones said for specific book goals, energy, communication skills, divine appointments (which means clearly Godplanned encounters), Bible-study interests, kind people, and un-hungry and un-vicious dogs were answered in such unmistakably God-wrought ways. Thousands upon thousands of people were reached out to: drug dealers, Muslims, Buddhists, atheists, agnostics, Catholics, Baptists, Bahá’í’s, Wiccans, all sorts of Christians — even Adventists. However, the most profound effects seemed to be

on us. Sharing Christ every day forced me to examine my beliefs and my personal relationship with Him. Everyone else in the group seemed to think the same thing: By ministering to others, our relationships with Christ became more vibrant and whole-hearted. The summer I spent doing door-to-door for literature evangelism turned out to be the best summer of my life yet.

THAILAND MISSION TRIP Danielle Diaz This summer I was given the opportunity to spend a month in Thailand on the Walla Walla University Thailand Cultural Mission Trip, conducted by Pedrito Maynard-Reid. I absolutely love to travel, so I was very excited to have this opportunity, as I had never been to Thailand before. Our mission was to teach English to seventh graders at a school, to conduct an English camp VBS in the evenings, and to work on a local farm for a family in need. Originally I was on board to work on the farm. After the first day, however, I felt a calling to teach English.

“After the first day of teaching, I knew I had made the right choice.” After the first day of teaching, I knew I had made the right choice. I was so blessed by the students that we taught, and it was also very challenging to me, but all around an awesome experience. Our VBS English camp in the evenings was also very challenging, as I was in the group working with the little kids. They understood very

G TH

little, so it was difficult to find activities that would engage them as well as teach them. Since it was an Adventist community center, we were able to find common ground in some songs we sang with them, and they also taught us some in Thai! The last three days of the mission trip, the teachers joined the farmers and we spent the last little bit Pic on the farm weeding, mixing concrete, andan old building a new shed for the family. cliffs. Overall the experience was once in aflutes lifetime, and I am so thankful and feel soon ho blessed to have been given this opportunity.trail a I can’t imagine a better way to spend theride b end of your summer! hesita the f of th believ The r cry: “ been This summer was just another reminder Yes of why I love getting out of school. Not for all the free time or the lack of homework, but contr because I get to go to camp. Even if you just have never worked at a summer camp, you actua probably know someone who has. For the lived last four years I have worked at Camp IdaEmil Haven. Located on gorgeous Lake Payette but in central Idaho, it is one of the most white beautiful places I have ever been. But it’s ginge not just the location or being able to play of a in the sun on the lake that makes me love it disco so much, it’s working with the kids. Almost hot w all of my best memories of camp have to do with campers and the things they do 1. and say. From slapping mosquitoes onrunn their faces to getting launched off the innerup so tubes, they are always unpredictable andthis hilarious. Because Ida-Haven is a smallerand camp, every night we bring all the campershazar and staff together for worship. After a shortthose song service and a skit, the pastor comes outin W and gives the kids a message or story thatrealiz correlates with the theme (Know Hope).to An Every night I got the chance to listen andyou learn along with these younglings aboutwalki what Christ has done for us and the ways 2. He shows us those blessings every day. Itwater has been one of the greatest experiences ofrecom my life working at summer camp, and I willnowh continue to work there as long as I can. summ

KNOW HOPE Daniel Jenks

some

COLUMN AND CREATIVE WRITING

GREETINGS FROM THE LAND OF ONIONS Rebecca Brothers

Columnist

Picture with me, if you will, a scene from an old Western. There are cacti and sandstone cliffs. Crickets, coyotes, and Native American flutes dominate the soundtrack. A lone man on horseback comes around the bend in the trail and sees a small cabin. He’s just about to ride by when he hears a muffled shriek. He hesitates. A wizened figure stumbles onto the front porch and peers in the direction of the rider, shading her eyes as if she can’t believe what she sees. The rider hears a broken cry: “Has College Place been restored?”

“I could get heatstroke while walking to Andy’s Market.”

Yes, I’ve been here all summer, and contrary to the scene just described, it was actually pretty fun. I lived in an attic (like Emily Dickinson, but without the white dresses and gingerbread) and kept cool with the aid of a wet washcloth worn as a hat. I also discovered some surprising upsides to the hot weather. 1. You have a medical excuse not to go running. Don’t even think about getting up so early that it’s cool enough to run — this can result in disorientation, fatigue, and extreme grumpiness, which may be hazardous to your roommate’s health. For those unfamiliar with the local seasons, July in Walla Walla is the time of year when you realize, “I could get heatstroke while walking to Andy’s Market.” Then comes August, and you realize, “I could get heatstroke while walking out to get the mail.”

2. You finally start drinking enough water. We’ll gently ignore the fact that the recommendation of eight cups daily is nowhere close to “enough water” for the summers here. Your best bet is to move somewhere cool and moist, such as a

Even if you don’t bake or run, there’s plenty to do here during the summer if you’re proactive. If you’re taking classes and/ or working, you’d be surprised at how quickly the time goes by. One minute you’re hugging everyone goodbye at graduation, and then you blink and the bookstore is advertising deals for JumpStart. In another couple of blinks, I know, it will be June again and I’ll be standing on Kretschmar lawn with a tassel in my peripheral vision, wondering if it’s too late to go for that double major. But right now, freshmen, welcome! Everyone else, welcome back! Join me in a nostalgic moment, won’t you? Doesn’t it just seem like yesterday that you were rolling up to the dorm with your brand-new closet organizers? Do you remember feeling totally overwhelmed at JumpStart and thinking that your best career move would be to move back home right away, work at Dairy Queen, marry a blackjack dealer, and have seventeen children? Oh, that was just me? Regardless of your standing here, your thoughts about being here, or what crazy things happen in the next nine months (and if the last four years are any indicator, trust me, there will be plenty), here’s to the school year of 2012–13. Let’s make it a good one.

LIFE GOES ON

basement, the Oregon Coast, or an ant farm. 3. Dough rises faster than Dan Brown’s characters can stumble across yet another “top-secret” organization spanning centuries and continents. In the winter, making bread is a pain because you have to coddle it like a colicky newborn for three hours. You have to warm up everything — hands, bowls, countertops — that will come in contact with the bread dough, just to make sure the yeast won’t die. In the summer, this warming up is already done for you, and the dough is ready to bake in under two hours. Beautiful.

PERSPECTIVE

Kayla Albrecht Creative Writing Editor

The old man leaned back in his chair. He remained silent as the waitress refilled his water. I thanked her for the new iced tea. “Thanks for coming, dad. I know it’s been a while.” He looked at my eyes and I looked at the condensation on his glass. “Life’s been crazy.” I ran my hands through my hair, met his gaze, and wondered when he had lost his smile. “Marcy’s on maternity leave now. She hates it — she’s always so antsy. The house has never been so clean.” The waitress returned, this time with our food. We ate in silence. Once we were finished, the old man pulled something out from under the table and slid it across to me. I stared at it: The Giving Tree. Suddenly I was eight years old, and my father was smiling at me because I had just won the secondgrade spelling bee. I was twelve and had just hit my first home run. I was sixteen and was getting pictures taken for the sophomore prom. I was eighteen and getting my diploma. I was getting married and graduating college and reading the positive pregnancy test and I was terrified. I looked back up into my father’s eyes and they were so old, now; so old but the same. The same eyes that had read The Giving Tree with me every night until I was twelve. The check was placed on the

table, and I payed for it, and when the change was returned my father took a penny. He rolled it between his fingers. “Life goes on, kid. I promise.” He slowly stood up, and I had the impulse to beg him to stay, to explain how to be a good father, to promise me that I wouldn’t screw up and that my wife and my baby would be happy. I didn’t. Instead, I stood up as well, and considered the same advice he had given me for years. “It does.” He reached over and placed his palm on my shoulder, held it there. His head bowed and his arm returned to his side and I watched his back as he left the restaurant. I fell back into my seat and studied the storybook. I opened the front page and noticed my father’s harsh penmanship. To my first grandchild: Welcome to the family. Your father and I love you. I flipped through the pages, and a piece of paper slid out from the last. Another note. Son, live each day and that day only. You can’t live focusing on tomorrow because today will slip away. That’s the one thing that I’ve learned in all my years that’s worth mentioning. Life goes on, kid. I’m proud of you. I had walked out of the restaurant and had started my car before I noticed the penny on my windshield. Head facing in — lucky. My father had always believed in making his own luck.

SNAPSHOTS

Photos by Josh McKinney

SNAPSHOTS

Photos by Josh McKinney

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FEATURE

INTERVIEW WITH JOHN McVAY 2.0 This week John McVay sat down with The Collegian to discuss sandwiches, education, and his upcoming second term as president:

was, “If you’re prayed up about this and you’re not just saying, ‘Why don’t we ask McVay to do this to get out of a jam?’, then we feel that we need to be in submission to the call of the group and say ‘yes.’” C: Are there any changes you would make as a result of what you’ve learned? M: Yes, actually. We are at a different place now than we were at the beginning of my last term, and that demands a different approach. I want to focus on four things.

The Collegian: In your address today, you speculated about the contents of sandwiches named for noted figures on campus. What would the John McVay sandwich contain? John McVay: That’s a very big question. Maybe peanut butter and jelly. On whole wheat. C: When you resigned as president last school year, you cited a desire to return to the classroom. How has this desire changed? M: It hasn’t. I was very much looking forward to inhabiting these hallways and teaching bright, able students. And that hunger is still there. You’ll notice that I’ve maintained my study leave, which gives me a chance to take a good bite out of some projects that are pretty important to me. I’ll trust the Lord that there’s a way to exercise my calling for teaching, within the context of being president or in some other way that the Lord may have in mind. Through the twists and turns of the search process the group came back to me and asked, “Would you do this?” Pam and I prayed about it for some time. Our response

dollars to rebuild the infrastructure for campus, and to beautify our campus in order to be highly competitive in the world of higher education. The third item is to work closely with the VPs. Another way to put that would be to work through the VPs. I want to spend more individual time with them, listening to them, casting the vision as to where I see the institution going. The president frankly has done too much troubleshooting, and been too central to any crisis that comes up with an interdepartmental aspect to it. I intend to back off of some of that, to leave it in their very able hands. We have excellent vice presidents.

“I really believe in Adventist higher education and what it’s about. To me, it’s a very exciting mission. The president’s job thingThe wouldfourthbe “c o m m u n i n g description is all and communiIt’s awabout making sure cating.” fully easy to get too office bound: the institution is managing stuff, worrying doing everything and over things, and possible to fulfill its meetings, and scads of work to mission.” do. My hope is

The first thing is strategic planning and visioning. Thinking about the future of the institution and what we are going to be. Where are we headed? What types of programs are we going to offer? How big do we wish to become? What does our campus need to look like to facilitate that? What is the mission of the institution and how do we implement that vision in the future? One of the things I’ve learned is that intentionality in higher education pays dividends. If we sit around and let the storms bash us, hopefully we’ll endure, but we’ll be better off if we make our own weather.

The second is friendraising/fundraising. We’re sitting here in the administration building — the newest building on campus — but already this building is five years old. The average age of buildings on campus is now over 50 years. For the institution to be strong as we go into the future, to serve the church and to serve our students, we need to do some hard work. We need millions upon millions of

to develop some margin to the experience so I can spend more time with students on the five campuses that make up WWU.

It’s my intention to really emphasize those four. That doesn’t mean that I won’t write a report or a policy, but I want to really be able to look in the mirror at the end of 2013 and be able to say that those four things received my focus and energy. The support for stepping back in (as “John 2.0”) has been gratifying. The willingness of the chairman of the board, the board of trustees, the cabinet, and my colleagues on the faculty and staff to put some resources behind a shift in emphasis has been heartening.

C: How would you summarize your mission as WWU President? M: I really believe in Adventist higher education and what it’s about. To me, it’s a very exciting mission. The president’s job description is all about making sure the institution is doing everything possible to fulfill its mission.

C: Do you believe your presidential appointment at WWU is spiritual as well as administrative?

M: Unquestionably. This is not a secular institution. Our core values are framed bymov mentions of faith. We’re a community of faithseat committed to excellence in thought, generos-wha ity in service, beauty in expression, and faithtens in God. My personal calling, my personalnew identity, is probably more pastor/teacher. If Iwell can’t exercise that spiritual ministry throughthe the office of president, I probably need to do and something else.

food

C: WWU is an institution founded by the SDA church and represents Adventist views. Previous Collegian surveys indicate that a significant number of students may not hold Adventist values. How do you hope to be relevant to this diverse body without sacrificing these values or the university’s mission?

M: We live in a complex world today where the phenomenon of Adventism is not as monolithic as maybe it was perceived as being in the past. There’s greater divergence. We need to embrace our identity as owned and operated by the Seventh-day Adventist Church. Embedded in the church philosophy of education statement is a clear tag to the values and beliefs of the Adventist church. We don’t run from that; we don’t make excuses; we don’t shove stuff under the rug. But at the same time neither should it be our intention as an institution to hammer people over the head and say, “Now fall in line with this or else.” We seek to draw people in. That doesn’t mean for me that everything is negotiable, but it means that we have a willingness to engage, to converse, to think together, to reflect.

FEATURE

AT ODDS WITH

PERSPECTIVE S

ometimes simple stories illustrate the complexities and conundrums of life quite well. You may be at an institution of higher learning, but I’m sure that you have probably watched (and most likely loved) the movie Ratatouille. I want to remind you of the scene in the movie in which the infamous food critic (perfectly voiced by Peter O’Toole), Anton Ego, is seated in Gusteau’s restaurant. The waiter Mustafa approaches Mr. Ego and asks if he knows what he would like for the evening. Anton Ego replies, (read slowly with a heavy dose of pretension and arrogance), “Yes, I think I do. After reading a lot of overheated puffery about your new cook, you know what I am craving? A little perspective. That’s it. I’d like some fresh, clear, well-seasoned perspective. Can you suggest a good wine to go with that?” “With what, sir?”, the waiter says. “Perspective. Fresh out, I take it? ... Very well. Since you’re all out of perspective and no one else seems to have it in this BLOODY TOWN, I’ll make you a deal. You provide the food, I’ll provide the perspective, which would go nicely with a bottle of Cheval Blanc 1947.”1

Photo by DeviantArt user Thundertori

L IIllustration by James Mayne

et me relate another story. There is an old Korean tale about two frogs who lived in the valleys on opposite sides of a large mountain. Both wondered what the other side of the mountain looked like. Finally they summoned up the courage and, independently of each other, decided to climb the mountain to see what was on the other side. Arriving at the top at about the same time, they both had to chuckle about their adventure. But they had a problem. Being short, they couldn’t see the other side. So they decided to lock their frog fingers together and stand up on their hind legs in order to get a better chance at seeing the view. Since frogs have their eyes on the top of their heads, when they stood up together they looked back on their own side of the hill! Seeing it to be the same as where they came here, they decided that there was no reason to travel further as both sides of the mountain were the same.

quietly, subtly, uniquely, or unexpectedly.

James Mayne

Feature Editor

This simple story, and the scene from Ratatouille of Anton Ego, help illustrate the complex nature of perspective. Each of us leads a different life, with different circumstances and experiences. Some, like Anton Ego, have a perspective founded on an arrogance that makes people cringe. Others’ perspectives are affected by a blurred or faulty view, such as the frogs, whose perspectives were warped simply because of the location of their eyes. Others’ perspectives come out

Our perspectives are developed from a lifetime of experiences, learning, and impressions of the world in which we live. We cling to our perspectives with a tenacity that makes it incredibly difficult to change them, or to interact positively with people who hold perspectives antithetical to our own. When Anton Ego finally sat at his typewriter to review his dining experience, he wasn’t interested in what the chef, or other patrons, had to say; he had his view and that was all that mattered. Sometimes we are placed in situations that push us and force us to broaden our perspec-

tives, to see life from a different view, to more fully understand another person’s way of thinking. Becoming educated often has this effect on people, especially at the collegiate level. A college campus is a place in which hundreds or thousands of students, faculty, and administrators are thrown together in a wild mix of learning, ideas, beliefs, and worldviews. You will find many people with some truth to share, many with not much to say, and many who are just flat-out wrong. This menagerie of perspectives and varying degrees of truth can be frustrating, but it can also be exciting and stimulate knowledge, understanding, grace, and self-reflection. When we realize that other people’s ideas and

beliefs are not a threat but an opportunity for growth, we can exist amongst differences more adeptly and deepen our understanding of our own beliefs and values. So how do we deal with those who think differently than we do? How do we interact with those who are “wrong”? How do we gain new perspectives when we cling so closely to our own? How can we survive in this educational community, with the multitude of voices, and truly come away with an honest education? Or are we getting into college debt up to our chins just to have our preconceived ideas confirmed? Continues on following page

FEATURE

Continued from previous page

The first step is to take responsibility for our own perspectives and ideas. Recognize your background and how you have come to hold your beliefs, as well as how they are manifested in the way you interact with others. If you are a freshmen coming to college for the first time, take stock of who you are. What do you believe about the world? About religion? About society? What are the experiences that have formed your biases and understandings of how life should be? Every one of us is biased — it’s an undeniable part of the human experience. A second-, third-, or fourth-year (or beyond) student might think about how his or her perspectives have shifted, developed, and/or deepened over the last few

years. What have you learned that makes you see the world differently? A faculty member or administrator can look back on years of experience at Walla Walla University or another institution and think about the students, colleagues, ideas, and events that have brought them to the perspectives they now hold. Taking responsibility for the views you hold gives us a basis for expanding, changing, or even discarding those views when appropriate. Humility is also crucial. Although we are usually quite good at pointing out where other people have a warped view of things, it is sometimes (or often) the case that we are the ones who are wrong. As Aaron Sorkin bluntly reminded the Syracuse University

THE Fall SpEakER SERiES

THiS SERiES Will HElp you: • Learn about our community’s needs • Build stronger connections • Discover new ways to bless this valley

WHEN? 10:30-11:30 a.m. Sabbath mornings WHERE? WEC Room 209

BE HUMBLE.

a fairly abrasive way to put it, most of us will admit to the accuracy of his statements: The paradox of knowledge is that the more educated we are, the more we realize how little we know. When we are humble and take responsibility for the fact that we don’t always have the answer — that we can be dumb sometimes — we are better prepared to hear and constructively respond to another person’s views and ideas.

WWu Church Presents

aS CHRiSTiaNS WE aRE CallEd To livE iNCaRNaTioNally.

class of 2012, “Make no mistake about it, you are dumb. You’re a group of incredibly well-educated dumb people.”2 While this is

GuEStS inCLuDE • Sheriff John turner • State Representative terry nealey • Prison Minister Dan Preas • Principal Jim Sporleder • Whitman College President George Bridges and many more….

Another important aspect of dealing with different perspectives is to think about the very purpose of sharing/debating/arguing our diverse ideas and views. What is the point of two people with very different beliefs arguing about those beliefs? Some would say that people shouldn’t air their possibly controversial ideas at all, as doing so is “too polarizing.” But if we, as Socrates so wisely advocated, look at conversations and debates as mutual efforts at learning a greater truth about life, rather than as competitions to be won or lost, then we might find value in each person’s perspectives and contributions. We might not feel so threatened by an opposing viewpoint, as we would acknowledge that embedded

within this perspective so opposite our own might be a kernel of truth. We must also ask ourselves: What is the purpose of being at a university? What is the goal of education, and how does it relate to our perspectives and worldviews? An educational philosopher named Ellen White wrote, “Instead of educated weaklings, institutions of learning may send forth men [and women] strong to think and to act, men [and women] who are masters and not slaves of circumstances, men [and women] who possess breadth of mind, clearness of thought, and the courage of their convictions.”3 Walla Walla University was not founded to produce “educated weaklings,” but rather to challenge students to think and collaborate, to grow in their views, and to achieve — among other things — “excellence in thought.”4 Understanding the environment that we are in, the unique setting that is a college campus, is so important to the way we approach challenging beliefs and perspectives. A college campus, where the goal is to prepare our minds for a lifetime of thinking and grappling with ideas, concepts, and the abstractions that this world presents, is an ideal place for us to have our perspectives and beliefs challenged. It’s a place where we make room for ideas. There’s a give-andtake. Going into college and being upset that a professor is pushing you to reexamine how you view something is like going to a Chris Rock comedy show and getting of-

APPROACH DIALOGUES WITH THE MINDSET OF MUTUALLY SEEKING A GREATER TRUTH.

FEATURE fended at his jokes. As Rock talked about in a recent interview with NPR’s Terry Gross, if you’re offended by the jokes he makes, don’t pay $90 to go to one of his shows.5 Likewise, if we are paying to come to an institution of higher learning, we shouldn’t be upset when that institution tries to elevate us to higher learning by challenging our beliefs and/or preconceived notions of

RESPECT ANOTHER PERSON’S RIGHT TO THINK DIFFERENTLY. the world around us. Embrace it. Embrace the comedy, if you’re a Chris Rock fan; embrace the mental turbulence, if you’re a college student. Don’t be afraid of a little “fresh, clear, well-seasoned perspective” that may be different than your own. Finally, respect the differences that will THINK inevitably exist, ABOUT THE and don’t allow these differences PURPOSE OF to cause you to EDUCATION. disregard another person’s humanity. At the most elemental level we have an obligation to each other as people, an obligation to treat each other with respect and value. Employ whatever moral theory is at work within your life — whether you are a Christian, a Deist, a moral objectivist, or something else — and you will find a basic understanding of the need for respecting humanity. This forms the foundation for everything else that we have discussed, and greatly affects the way in which we treat each other. Later in Aaron Sorkin’s commencement speech, he summed all this up quite well: “Don’t

ever forget that you’re a citizen of this world, and there are things you can do to lift the human spirit, things that are easy, things that are free, things that you can do every day. Civility, respect, kindness, character. You’re too good for schadenfreude, you’re too good for gossip and snark, you’re too good for intolerance — and since you’re walking into the middle of a presidential election, it’s worth mentioning that you’re too good to think people who disagree with you are your enemy.”6 As we begin a new school year, think about how you interact with difficult people, or situations in which you feel at odds with another person’s viewpoint. Think about how you will respond when your beliefs are called into question, or when your perspectives are challenged, or when/if your misperceptions are corrected. Your response in these situations will contribute to or detract from the overall environment of Walla Walla University. Administrators, faculty, staff, and students all have a role to play in the timbre of dialogues, debates, interactions, and experiences that take place on this campus. So consider Socrates and the communal (rather than competitive) search for truth and meaning. For, as President Obama said, “We’re all in this together.”7

TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR YOUR OWN PERSPECTIVES AND IDEAS.

1. Ratatouille, 2007. 2. huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/14/aaron-sorkin-syracusecom_n_1515050.html. 3. whiteestate.org/books/ed/ed1.html. 4. wallawalla.edu/about-wwu/an-introduction/mission. 5. npr.org/2012/08/09/158443299/chris-rock-on-the-funnybusiness-of-finding-success. 6. huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/14/aaron-sorkin-syracusecom_n_1515050.html. 7. whitehouse.gov/the-press-office/2012/07/13/remarkspresident-campaign-event-roanoke-virginia.

“The unexamined life is not worth living.” —Socrates

“A true genius admits that he/she knows nothing.” —Albert Enstein

“I have never in my life learned anything from any man who agreed with me.” —Dudley Field Malone

“Intelligence plus character — that is the goal of true education.” —Martin Luther King, Jr.

“I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.” —Evelyn Beatrice Hall

LIFE

CULTURE

“GANGNAM STYLE” TAKES OVER Grant Perdew Culture Editor

“Gangnam Style” is taking over the globe. Right now, the entire world is fascinated by a mad South Korean pop artist, who goes by the pseudonym Psy (pronounced “sigh”). The new dance craze, with growing popularity comparable to the “Shuffle,” “Macarena,” and “YMCA,” soon will be the talents of every single person on the planet.1 The song is now a chart success in the United States, gaining radio play and a number-one spot on iTunes, thanks to the nearly 290 million views on YouTube so far.

Style” has spread across the internet like wildfire, and it is still burning strong. Now, Psy is bringing down the house, and “Gangnam Style” is likely to only get more popular in the coming weeks. And anyone who has seen the video can understand why. This song is exceptionally catchy and just downright funny. Also, the dance is surprisingly simple and anyone can learn it with a little bit of practice. And who wouldn’t want to be able to show off their “Gangnam Style” moves to everyone around them?

“The dance is surprisingly Since last week, simple and Psy has already beto make the anyone can gun rounds of many diftalk shows, learn it with ferent teach people his a little bit of tofantastic “invisible horse” dance. His practice.” appearance on The The song was released

in July on Psy’s sixth studio album. Before “Gangnam Style,” Psy was only mainly known in South Korea by his K-pop followers. But since the release of this new catchy anthem, “Gangnam

Ellen DeGeneres Show helped the show receive the highest viewer rating since 2003. On Sept. 20, “Gangnam Style” was recognized by Guinness World Records as the “Most ‘Liked’ Video in

YouTube History.” Now for those of you who want to know what the song is all about2, “Gangnam Style” refers to one of the most upscale areas of Seoul. According to Psy, it is the Beverly Hills of South Korea. The song is about this chic area, with the video including most scenes filmed there, and a galloping horse was (obviously) the inspiration for the dance. Fortunately, a horse is easy enough to imitate, and the dance has even spawned some flash mob events across the world.3 Last week, a flash mob organized by the TV show Extra in Los Angeles and another in New York City both featured appearances by Psy himself. So when this all begins to slow down, what will happen to Psy’s career? In the past, most of these song/dance crazes have been short-lived, just creating one-hit mar-

vels that go down in history. But chances are, Psy could continue to do well, at least in Korea, because he was already fairly popular in Asia before “Gangnam Style” was ever released. I doubt that Psy will have any more success with other songs on the U.S. chart; “Gangnam Style” is set on this high pedestal that cannot be moved. Psy has made glorious history. If you haven’t seen the video, please go check it out.4 Brace yourself for a wild ride of a video and prepared for the imminent possibility that afterward you may be parading around campus in “Gangnam Style” for the next few weeks.5 Use these steps to start your future of bringing “Gangnam Style” happiness to the world.

1. Hopefully ... 2. Unless you live in Seoul, Korea. 3. Hint hint, Walla Walla? 4. youtu.be/9bZkp7q19f0. 5. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing ...

AUTUMN ENTERTAINMENT DISTRACTIONS TUNES

Sept. 11 | The XX - Coexist

This ghoulish electropop duo is like butter to the ears, making a strong return with their sophomore album.

Sept. 18 | Carly Rae Jepsen - Kiss Buy me maybe?

SHOWS Sept. 13 | Glee

More music and drama with the 30-year-old high schoolers!

Sept. 25 | New Girl

Grab your hair chutney and watch out for youths, ‘cause Jess is back for season two!

Sept. 18 | The Killers - Battle Born

Sept. 27 | The Big Bang Theory

Sept. 24 | Mumford and Sons - Babel

Oct. 14 | The Walking Dead

“Somebody Told Me” they aren’t really Killers, but their music’s great. The banjo-pickin’, knee-slappin’ sensations are finally back!

Oct. 9 | Macklemore - The Heist

Seattle rapper with only 20 dollars in his pocket inspires great Goodwill shopping.

Oct. 9 | Ellie Goulding - Halcyon

The “Lights” are calling her home and British pop serenade has returned for album No. 2.

Oct. 22 | Taylor Swift - Red

I mean, this is exhausting, you know. But it will be the best album … like, ever.

Sheldon and Leonard are back for the sixth year of glorious geekiness.

Rick and Lori, please keep Carl in the house ...

CINEMATIC

Sept. 28 | Looper

Joseph Gordon Levitt, Bruce Willis, and explosions: What more could you want?

Oct. 5 | Taken 2

Liam Neeson searches for his stolen family … again.

DIVERSIONS

Eric Weber

Diversions Editor

LIFE

DEAR FRESHMEN ...

I am here to regretfully inform you that pop music has lied to you. Thankfully, this travesty has not gone unnoticed by moi. So I have taken it as my duty to inform you of the LIES that pop music has propagated. 1. You are not titanium. You are made of carbon and water and that’s sad. 2. “We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together” lies. You WILL eventually get back together and we will silently judge you because of it. 3. But the worst is from Carly Rae Jepsen convincing us that “Call Me Maybe” is an appropriate pick up line! Freshmen, a word of advice: If you want to date an upperclassman, have a financial statement and a copy of your credit score. These economic times are hard; pick up your game.

WACKY WASHINGTON LAWS 1. The harassing of Bigfoot, Sasquatch, or other undiscovered subspecies is a felony punishable by a fine and/or imprisonment. 2. X-rays may not be used to fit shoes.

FRESHMAN WORD SEARCH

CRAZY ° KERFUFFLE ° DRUDGERY OBLIVIOUS ° EXERTION ° WOEBEGONE

LIFE

SCIENCE & TECH AND HEALTH & WELLNESS

ENCODE me to explain what all of that meant.

Spencer Cutting

“The Human Genome Project gave us the sequence of the human genome, but now we actually know what most of it does.”

You may have heard before that much of the genome is “junk” DNA, or DNA that doesn’t code for genes. While this is true, the name is misleading: According to a study by the ENCODE project (a group of hundreds of scientists working since 2003), at least 80 percent of the genome is in fact functional–either as transcription factor–binding sites or as sequence coding for regulatory RNAs. While it has been known for some time that much of what was once called “junk” DNA is in fact functional, the ENCODE project has actually catalogued most of these specific functional sites. This is pretty big: The Human Genome Project gave us the sequence of the human genome, but now we actually know what most of it does.

The day-today function of cells depends on proteins. If a cell needs to do something chemically, it builds an enzyme (made of one or more proteins); if it needs structural support, it builds proteins to support it or enzymes that in turn build some non-protein structure. Proteins even mediate changes in cell shape. The normal function of cells, therefore, and hence the normal function of your body, depends on making new proteins.

If you haven’t had General Biology, allow

This begins in the nucleus with the tran-

Science & Tech Editor

scription of RNA from a gene, a segment of DNA that codes for a protein. That RNA exits the nucleus and is translated into a protein based on the sequence of RNA. Here’s where transcription factor– binding sites and regulatory RNAs come in. In order for RNA to be transcribed, transcription factors have to bind to transcription factor–binding sites. As they bind, they fold the strand of DNA so that they can stick together. When a bunch of them have bound, an enzyme called RNA polymerase binds to them, and then starts transcription of RNA. If all of this takes place when it

wasn’t supposed to, regulatory RNAs tag the new RNA for destruction, which helps prevent inappropriate protein production. What this all means is that your genome isn’t just a long string of characters coding for something meaningful — it is that, but it’s also an elaborate structure that works in conjunction with cellular products to orchestrate, through intricately complex mechanisms, everything your body does. Scientists knew that all this stuff was happening before the ENCODE project, but now we have a detailed map of where it all happens, which will help lead to a clearer understanding of normal human function, as well as of disease. If you want to know more, there’s a summary of the research project in Nature titled “Genomics: ENCODE explained” (including links to all 11 papers that resulted from their work) available for free at nature.com/ nature/journal/v489/n7414/full/489052a. html.

HEALTH, SWEET ONION STYLE Karl Wallenkampf Health & Wellness Editor

Hello and welcome, incoming students! You have reached the land of sweet onions, low hills, and no malls. However good or bad that might sound to you, my column is here to share the know-how to be healthy and well through the year! Here are my promises:

1. To encourage a healthy collegiate

lifestyle through informative, readable, and immediately applicable articles. 2. To provide a diverse range of material covering the different facets of the three main pillars of health and wellness: intellectual, spiritual, and physical. 3. To complete and verify any workout plan or health advice, and consume any food that I suggest.

You may have heard of the “freshman fifteen.” A reference to the weight gain many college freshmen experience due to stress and seated studying, some people fear it while others merely rely on their exercise routines (the few, the proud). If you reside in the more concerned category or desire some new research, read on. Gretchen Reynolds, a health contributor to The New York Times, reports on new research in her article “Dieting vs. Exercise for Weight Loss.”1 A team researched the hunter-gatherer Hadza tribe in Tanzania to find if hunter-gatherers have a higher metabolic rate (burn more calories) than a more sedentary, Western lifestyle. Surprisingly though, the average Hadza was slimmer than an average Westerner, “[T]he Hadza’s average metabolic rate … was about the same as the average metabolic rate for Westerners.”2 Dr. Timothy Church, who holds John S. McIllhenny Endowed Chair at the

Pennington Biomedical Research Center in Louisiana, verifies this research: “It’s been known for some time that, calorie for calorie, it’s easier to lose weight by dieting than by exercise.”3 These researchers might sound like another group swinging the discussion of health to another extreme, but the lesson is the necessity to have a balance and be aware of what you ingest. Many assume that exercise allows guiltless eating. Untrue! Exercise is essential, and does wonders for health, but what you put in your body still counts, especially if health is your goal. As for dieting, Adam Campbell, the Fitness Director at Men’s Health, states that a pillar of good health is to eliminate added sugars. The United States Department of Agriculture found the average American consumes 82 grams of added sugars daily: roughly 317 useless calories from soda, baked goods and breakfast cereals, candy, fruit drinks, and

sweetened dairy products such as ice cream.4 Eliminate added sugars and you may notice improvements within weeks. I will work to fulfill Campbell’s recommendation myself, yet you or I may slip up. Then, staying positive is absolutely necessary. Positivity is equally necessary academically. Encourage your friends in all their endeavors — your positive attitude will likely improve your own work, too. Good luck for the school year, and I hope this year brings you health and wisdom from the Giver of good gifts: “Oh that men would praise the Lord for his goodness, and for his wonderful works to the children of men!”5 1. Reynolds, Gretchen. “Dieting vs. Exercise for Weight Loss.” The New York Times, August 1, 2012. well.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/08/01/ dieting-vs-exercise-for-weight-loss. 2. Reynolds. 3. Reynolds. 4. Campbell, Adam. The Men’s Health Big Book of Exercises (New York: Rodale, Inc., 2009), 440. 5. Psalm 107:8 (KJV).

FOODIE

LIFE

DARK CHOCOLATE CHIP AND SEA SALT COOKIES Amy Alderman Food Editor

I love cookies. Peanut butter cookies, double chocolate chip cookies, molasses cookies, oatmeal cookies — the list could go on forever. Furthermore, I believe there is a cookie that will withstand the test of time again and again and again: the chocolate chip cookie.

While doing some research on how to bake cookies “properly,” I learned some valuable lessons that I’d like to share with you: 1. When a cookie recipe calls for a specific type of salt, use it. Table salt ≠ coarse sea salt. Ever. 2. You can soften butter in the microwave quickly by lowering the power setting on the microwave and zapping it in 5–10 second intervals until

softened. The butter will get soft and won’t melt. 3. If you like your cookies gooey instead of crunchy, remove them from the oven as soon as the edges begin turning brown. Let them finish baking on the pan for a few more minutes before removing them. Perfection.

5. Always double the batch of cookies and freeze half of them. You’ll thank yourself later. 6. Remember that the answer is always cookies. Always.

4. Trying to make a single cookie in a mug (like you may see on Pinterest) doesn’t work well. Don’t ever try it.

Dark Chocolate and Sea Salt Cookies Makes: Approx. 36 cookies | Total time: Approx. 60 minutes

What you’ll need: mixer, mixing spoon, measuring cups/spoons, cookie sheet, cooling rack 1 cup (2 sticks) salted butter, softened 2¾ cups flour ½ cup white sugar ¾ tsp. medium coarse sea salt 1½ cups packed brown sugar 1 tsp. baking soda 2 eggs 1½ tsp. baking powder 2 tsp. vanilla extract 2¼ cups dark chocolate chips or chunks

Photos by Amy Alderman

What’s In Season?

Cream butter, white sugar, and brown sugar until it is fluffy (about three minutes using a mixer). Add eggs and vanilla and beat for an additional two minutes. Add baking soda, baking powder, sea salt, and flour until it is completely incorporated into the batter. Add the dark chocolate chips or chunks and distribute evenly throughout dough. Drop about two tablespoons of dough onto a lightly greased or parchment-lined cookie sheet. Bake for 12–14 minutes until edges are golden brown. Remove from oven and allow cookies to cool on cookie sheet for two minutes before removing. Transfer to a cooling rack.

Apples - Beets - Carrots - Cauliflower - Corn - Dates - Figs - Grapefruit Grapes - Onions - Pears - Plums - Potatoes - Pumpkins - Squash - Sweet Potatoes

LIFE

SPORTS

LOOKING AHEAD

Events

Tye Forshee

Mudbowl

School Sports Editor

Sept. 30: AGA (women) at 10 a.m., OPS (men) at 12 p.m.

WWU Soccer vs. South Puget Sound Community College Sept. 28 at 2 p.m.

Women’s Volleyball vs. Multnomah University

Intramurals are getting a boost this year with some new equipment provided by funds from ASWWU. With intramurals rising in popularity, much of the current equipment has seen better days. Look for

Sept. 27 at 6 p.m.

Women’s Volleyball vs. Central Washington University

Trevor Boyson

NFL and referees reach agreement to end lockout.

Flag football is the main attraction in intramurals this fall as hundreds of students will play through the bitter cold that can come to Walla Walla. Sign up for flag football on the WWU website: wallawalla.edu/ life-at-wwu/intramurals/sign-ups. You can sign up a whole team, or sign up as an individual to be added to a team. Flag football will most likely start Oct. 1, so sign up if you have not already. The annual Mudbowl is this Sunday. Be prepared to get muddy and tackled during this fun game of football. It will be located behind the track toward WWVA. Women’s Varsity Volleyball and Men’s Varsity Soccer are underway right now, so come cheer them on throughout the quarter. Upcoming home games are listed to the left.

In a physical game on Sept. 21 marred by penalties, the Wolves showed that they would not back down from contact. The Wolves scored first from a header by Andres Diocares off an impressive corner kick 20 minutes into the game and never looked back. The second half became a physical game by both teams which included some minor injuries. Despite the physical play, the Wolves reaped the rewards of two penalty kicks by Daniel Escalante to put away the Wenatchee Knights for good.

I CAN’T STOP WATCHING

Oct. 1 at 7 p.m.

Breaking News

A new school year at Walla Walla University has just begun, and some change has accompanied it. The renovation in the WEC of the bathrooms and locker rooms is nearly finished. The newly renovated bathrooms will be much more accessible,and functional, as they will be completely notouch facilities. The locker rooms will be much improved over the previous ones, including upgraded shower rooms. The open floor plan will resemble that of a public pool, with specific qualities that will benefit students greatly. WEC renovations should be finished by the end of October.

new flag football flags this fall, new basketball jerseys in the winter, and new softball bats provided by the school in the spring.

WOLVES SOCCER BEATS WENATCHEE VALLEY CC 3–0

National Sports Editor The autumn heralds the football season and all its glory. Only there’s something different about this year: the referees. Nobody turns on the TV Sunday afternoons or Monday nights to watch the likes of NFL referees, yet the fact that the usual staff was missing quickly became stunningly apparent. The NFL and the referees were in contract negotiations that seemed to move in slow motion. In the meantime, referees were called upon from various collegiate positions to fill in the gaps. Analysts constantly try to judge whether players can make the jump from the collegiate to the professional level, and apparently that difficulty also stands in the way

of new referees. The adjustments resulted in blown calls, extra timeouts awarded, and a last-second call that cost the Green Bay Packers a game. The NFL is notoriously faster, more vicious, and more complex than what the replacement referees were used to in college games. Add the national stage and you have immense pressure, which seemed to cause mistakes in excess. Thank goodness things have been worked out. Negotiations between referees and the NFL were resolved after having been on pause since Sept. 1. Turns out, it was a stalemate. The NFL figured we would keep watching, and the referees predicted they’d prove to be indispensible as their replacements bungled their way through the season. The problem was that they were both right. Unfortunately, the catalyst to the solution came as a Hail Mary interception was called incorrectly, and gifted the Seattle

Seahawks a miraculous and perplexing win in a close game against the Packers. During the Falcons vs. Broncos game, broadcaster Mike Tirico said, “Honestly. It’s embarrassing. The command and control of this is gone.” Neither a fair nor smoothly administered game seemed possible under the replacement officiating teams, yet analysts and fans alike still showed up to watch and break down every game. We couldn’t peel ourselves away from the imminent train wreck. And sure enough, a baffling bad call finally ruined an entire game. This year is going down in the history books with an asterisk, much like the shortened NBA season. We saw the most dominant sport in America finally get its cage rattled. The good thing is we can finally move on and hope that one game doesn’t end up discounting an entire year of football for the Green Bay Packers.

SUMMER ESCAPADES

Megan Cleveland

LIFE

COLLEGIAN WISDOM

Travel Editor

Summer has finally come to a close and, finding myself back in Walla Walla, I took the opportunity to ask a few WWU students about their summer travels. Scandinavian Tourism Ellie Manley, Biology, and Hannah Myhre, Music

A Taste of Turkey Macie Sattelmayer, International Business and Marketing I was accepted into a summer program to be an English teacher as well as an internship at Bank Asya in Istanbul, Turkey. The first month, I taught English in Antalya where I lived with four Turkish women. Antalya is the third-most-visited city in the world because

of its great beaches and awesome day trips; however, my favorite thing to do was visit the incredible waterfalls. It was hard to say goodbye to my new Turkish friends after that first month, but I had to move on to new adventures in Istanbul where I interned at Bank Asya. On the weekends, I’d visit historical sites. Even with all my planning, I still only saw half of them, since the city is 5,000 years old, has over 15 million residents, and takes at least two hours to cross due to its poor infrastructure. The modes of transportation were numerous and inexpensive, but the ferry ride across the Bosporus was the best part, as it gave a great view of the city and all the mosques dotting the hills.

dehydration any longer, and was stared down by everyone within 100 yards. Go travel and make your own memories. Caribbean Cruising William Fandrich, Psychology Down at the very end of the Caribbean island chain, off the coast of Venezuela, lies the small and cultured island of Grenada. During the summer, I traveled here with my family and a small group of friends to get lost in the isles of paradise. We rented a small sailing boat from Port Louis and set sail for a marine sanctuary called Tobago Cays, roughly 100 nautical miles north of Grenada. Along the way we made stops at ports, snorkeled daily, and tried as much local food as we could on our 10-day voyage. While sailing we had ample

Photo by William Fandrich

Turkey is absolutely beautiful and rich in culture and tradition. Some of the traditions I quickly adjusted to were the amazing hospitality and incredible foods, as well as being offered black tea or Turkish coffee at every meeting and break. Despite a racing heart and the inability to sleep at times, all the caffeine was worth it when I saw people smile and become more welcoming as I accepted what they offered. I experienced all of Ramadan, which is essentially a month of fasting from both food and water from sunup to sundown. One day I pulled out my Nalgene while walking through the city because I couldn’t take the

Touchdown? Interception? Dual possession? Who cares? We’re Seahawks fans!

time to hone our deckhand skills, as all 10 of us sea-goers took turns at manning the helm, weighting anchor, and yes ... even swabbing down the deck. The trip resulted in indescribable views and unforgettable memories. While it remains a location difficult to get to, it is worth the trouble if you get the chance. From getting stung by jellyfish to sailing with a pod of dolphins, the trip offered endless surprises waiting to be viewed and experienced upon the horizon.

Norway, Denmark, and Sweden: The world leaders of delicious bread, scrumptious pastries, delightful coffee, and some of the most gorgeous scenery the world has to offer. At least, that is the conclusion we came to over the two weeks we spent traveling around these wonderful places. What made our trip somewhat unusual was that we didn’t spend all our time in and out of hotels, visiting every souvenir shop and museum these places had to offer. Since Hannah’s family resides in Norway, the first week and a half of our trip was spent living with the locals. We enjoyed rustic cabin life in the tiny town of Gol, Norway; university student life in Bergen, Norway; and busy city life in Norway’s capital, Oslo. Local grocery stores, coffee shops, and small boutiques consumed our days, and we took great pleasure in just relaxing at home reading books and eating home-cooked meals. After leaving Norway, the cities of Copenhagen, Denmark, and Helsingborg, Sweden, were the places where our true tourist selves emerged. Visiting multiple castles and museums, renting bikes, going on rides at Tivoli (an old-fashioned amusement park in the heart of the city), and having to pay ridiculous amounts of money just for a cup of coffee made us feel like true travelers and also made for a wonderful end to our little European vacation.

C Photo by Ellie Manley

The Seahawks win on a controversial call.

TRAVEL

Apple releases the iPhone 5. Imagine what Steve Jobs would have done.

Walmart turns 50. Almost old enough to be a greeter at itself.

Google Maps was replaced by Apple’s Maps. The world is changing.

Enrollment passes 1,900! Five to a room?

Julian Weller The Heel Editor

Hey girl, seeing you back on campus makes my heart burn with a joy hotter and brighter than a hundred Wenatchees. How are you guys? Welcome back to another year of cafeteria lines, lost keys, and CommUnity brilliance. Don’t lie, you missed it. And I bet you forgot how handsome President McVay is in those academic robes. Sheesh! Speaking of, President McVay’s CommUnity talk struck a chord with me. Normally CommUnity trains you to study in other noisy environments like the library, or class, or anywhere else people text. But I perked up faster than a cop on College

Avenue when McVay mentioned his visit to the Adventist archives in Collonges-sousSalève, and how it emphasized to him the importance of discovery to growth. That’s a good reminder, and universally applicable. Whatever you’re trying to get better at — an instrument, writing, socializing — you’re not going to advance unless you go somewhere new. Everything needs some structure to grow, but you’ve got to give yourself some room to branch out. Get out there! Meet new people, try new things, find out for yourself. Walla Walla is one of the friendliest places to try things out, as long as they aren’t spelled s-p-i-r-i-t-u-a-l f-o-r-m-a-t-i-o-n.

The Longest Table on the same weekend?) I know my pad is pretty zen-empty right now. Anyone need to get rid of a bed or a bookcase … or a desk … or a table … or some chairs? Anyways, this is The Heel — I hope you like it. If you don’t, tell me why. Friends abroad, have fun out there. Everyone else, don’t have any fun at all. Go do your homework. Eat your vegetables.

Useless Trivia: Russia was likely named by invading Swedes after the Gutnish word for pony: russ. For the last time: Eat your broccoli, child!

It’s been nice seeing you all this week. I’m looking forward to more, uh, seeing. Good luck organizing that room, blocking out that schedule, and figuring out what to do this weekend. (Really? Surf trip and

VERBATIM “A battery’s like a dog. It’ll give you all the love it can until it says, ‘I can’t physically do that.’”

— Curtis Nelson

“I’m so bummed … I didn’t have any deep man experiences last year.”

— Jon Anderson, on being at WWU while friends were abroad

“I don’t care if you break a window and sneak in the day it’s due.”

— Frederic Liebrand, on turning in assignments

“What would the ingredients be of a sandwich named the Linda Emmerson?”

— John McVay, in CommUnity

“You’re married, huh? No reason to take that morning aerobics class, then.”

— Don Riley, on physical fitness

Hear something funny? Report it! julian.weller@wallawalla.edu

SUPER JEWEL QUEST If you missed out last spring, here’s the deal: This campus-wide scavenger hunt (including school-owned properties like the DX and Mountain View) was inspired last year by an Oxford professor and my cheap English go-phone. Every week I’ll hide three jewels (pictured) on campus with clues to find them. You will quest for them to win prizes and minimal street cred. But hey, you could always team up with that one cutie-pie to solve them. The format might change around, you might have to search the web, but rain or shine I’ll riddle you silly, suckers! This week’s hide-ku:

Wenatchee inspires me to ponder what theft earned Prometheus’ ire. Where could I find such a thing? In three such berths jewels gleam.

Photo by Julian Weller

THIS SUMMER, WHAT DID YOU DO THAT YOU WEREN’T EXPECTING? “I became a rockstar.”

Chase Armayor, Jr., Art

“Hang gliding.”

Austin Beckner, Fr., Engineering

“Skydiving.”

Keyon Brown, So., Engineering

“Climbed the Grand Canyon.”

Megan Bartley, Fr., Spanish

“Have my hand inside of a salmon.”

Matt Collins, Jr., Business