PERSONAL HEALTH

Do you get angry more often as you grow older?

In a Psychology Today article There’s little reward for and blog, Morton Shaevitz notes yelling at the neighborhood kids the old saying: “You’re only as old to stay off your property. as you feel.” Then, he adds: “Yet, “Otherwise, you’ll waste all of to the outside world, you’re only your energy patrolling your yard as old as you behave.” and yelling at kids to get the hell

“Being grumpy, negative, off it,” Kershner wrote. judgmental, Closer to critical, rigid, and home, 80-yearcomplaining doesn’t old Dunwoody really feel very good, resident Barry and guess what? It (I’m using first doesn’t make the names only, at people around you the request of feel good, either.” the interviewees)

A recent “anger agrees. “Many management” of my retired survey found that male friends find Georgians (in they have time general) were angry Judith L. Kanne, on their hands about six times per week during RN, BSN, BA and say they will take a closer look 2020 (comparable is a registered nurse and at their daily to our national freelance writer who lives surroundings and average). The survey in Atlanta. voice opinions on (from Alcohol. what they see.” org) included 3,003 To others, this Americans. may seem like criticism and may

Many said that spending be viewed as “grouchy” behavior. more time at home for But Barry sees it as leading social distancing during the to “the popular description of coronavirus pandemic was ‘grouchy old men.’” a major contributor. A slow Jim (also in his 80s) and a WiFi connection or an excess long-time friend of Barry’s said, workload can add to one’s “In recent years, I have become irritability. The pandemic more ‘grouchy’ or impatient. brought with it a wave of This has only been exacerbated negative emotions, such as fear, by the arrival of COVID last stress, anger and frustration March!” at these unprecedented Jim and Barry both say their circumstances, according to the activity since retirement includes survey. keeping healthy and being

The survey also found that involved with non-profit groups. 68% of the Georgians who have It has been very rewarding. anger based on the pandemic In asking about Jim’s opinion have used alcohol as a coping of women and irritability, he mechanism, and two of three indicated their “forbearance has of them admit that alcohol only improved by several degrees,” makes them angrier. and he says he is thankful for

So, in these angry times, here that. are some thoughts on getting Paul, a colleague and editor mad as you grow older. on aging issues says, “I’m always on the lookout for ageist Grumpy Old Men Here’s what Jim Kershner, in The Spokesman Review, suggests to aging men: “Do not turn into a ‘Grumpy Old Man’ — shift your still not-inconsiderable energies into new, constructive pursuits, [the] ones that make sense for a 60-year-old man.” stereotypes, of course, and have had my aging self as a primary source. I do find that in some ways I’ve become less patient with things I used to let slide — with a bit of subvocal grousing — ‘Good grief, Charlie Brown, who’s got time for that?’” “I think that’s true of many men and women as we look back on what we had to put up with before. But if one can learn not to take it out on people — store clerks, loved ones, politicians and their office staff, and mainly on yourself — you can possibly realize the challenge of making a point more creatively.” Paul calls this strategic impatience.

Senior lecturer Louise Brown Nicholis wrote in a 2019 article that “not all negative emotions are necessarily bad. If you’re stuck in traffic and running late, anger with the situation might motivate you to find an alternative route, which will then relieve your stress. But anger is less useful if you’re in the same situation but stuck on a motorway with no option to divert.”

However, Nicholis also reminds us that, “Emotions have physiological effects, such as raising the level of cortisol in your bloodstream, and can affect your health. Indeed, a study, (published in a Canadian Psychology and Aging article) shows that high levels of anger are associated with poor health in older people.”

According to Nicholis, “[N]ew research shows a link between emotion and health in older age — we do not know whether anger causes inflammation and illness or whether health problems make people angrier.”

Grouchy old women

“A major study of cultures all over the world identified six basic human emotions—and not surprisingly, anger was one of them,” Rosalind Barnett and Caryl Rivers state in a 2020 Psychology Today article. “Girl babies may scream until their little faces grow red with rage. But the older they get, the less such behavior is tolerated.”

“As adults, women get the message that anger is alien to them. We simply have no script for female anger that does not involve such words as “crazy,” “out of control,” or simply “bonkers,” state Barnett and Rivers.

Writer Ann Richardson says she has a “… good life and little to complain about.” She believes most people who know her see her as a cheerful older woman. Yet, at the same time, Richardson says she feels herself turning into a Grumpy Old Woman.

“I don’t know whether I am more annoyed by other people or by the increasing presence of modern technology,” Richardson writes. “All I know is that sometimes all my good cheer gets taken away.”

Bonnie Marcus, who coaches executives, talks about a woman’s “double whammy” in the workplace. These are items that can add to a woman’s grumpiness, she explains in a Forbes article. “What’s clear from my conversations with women over 50,” says Marcus, is that the majority are still ambitious and don’t want to retire.”

“Their motivation is not always financial,” states Marcus. “They‘re seeking fulfilling work and have the desire to utilize their skills and experience and remain in the workplace as long as possible.”

These women have a lot to contribute and want to be productive. If that’s your case, Marcus says to “declare your ambition and let others know that you have no intention of slowing down.”

Anger Doesn’t Discriminate

If you find yourself feeling angry when you’d rather not, there are plenty of ways to help control and manage the emotion, from journaling feelings, to meditation, to exercise, or to talking things over with a trusted friend, loved one or professional.

Some “silver lining” ideas for all of us come from Shaevitz (and others). Over the next week or two, be enthusiastic and see what happens. Text your grandchildren and reconnect. Don’t try to win every argument — instead, listen to what the other person is saying.

But most of all, don’t be a grouch. facebook.com/AtlantaSeniorLife

From Big Bird to rock and roll to the circus, the Omni hosted them all

In 1972, a new structure appeared downtown. It was called the Omni. This Omni Complex, now home to State Farm Arena and CNN Center, had everything in those of many who did. The amazing, strange, cool structure that could accommodate all these events was itself a marvel. Maybe, unlike other venues, it cost a couple of a ton of funky soul bands, and artists. We saw the Godfather of Soul, James Brown, perform there and there was no doubt as to why he held that title: James and the Flames had the place as funky as it had ever been…and possibly was until its demise. Later, crackers and cheeses with mineral water to drink! Not the afterparty one would expect. Both times we saw Bruce Springsteen, he played for two hours, took a 30-minute break, and then came back and played two more hours. The Boss gave you your money’s worth. days from ice skating, extra bucks to park we saw a Burt Reynolds restaurant, a game FROM THE CRATES -- I mean this was downtown. And one Michael Jackson. arcade to restaurants Kelly McCoy thing I learned…park Some of and bars. To say it was different from anything making up a part of Atlanta’s cityscape, is beyond is a veteran Atlanta broadcaster who writes about the days popular music only came on vinyl records, which often were stored near the exit! It was grand going in, but if you left with everyone else, there were just too many people and not enough asphalt so his moves were not human, but he didn’t have a whole lot an understatement. in crates the getaway could be a on JB. It definitely was what mess. Omni the city needed to begin meeting I chuckle when I think about shows the entertainment demands how much the area has changed. made from a growing public…locally, Thank goodness in 1979, a room for and statewide. MARTA train station opened. all sorts of

The Omni addition had a Some parking stresses were acts. We significant impact on Atlanta relieved, but there were still saw Steely becoming a major city. The hundreds of people who didn’t Dan… Omni Coliseum could host any and every kind of event imaginable, from tractor pulls to Big Bird to every major music act touring America. Not to mention the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey Circus. The list goes on and on. There were Atlanta Flames Hockey matches, pro basketball games with the Hawks, professional tennis matches, even performances by motorized vehicles. After an evening of motocross or monster trucks and the fumes of their fuel, I’d imagine a shower and fresh air were welcomed. I never attended either, but knew The Omni take the train because it didn’t travel in their direction home. While the building was a great place for most events, for concerts or any kind of musicbased show, it could turn into an acoustical nightmare with cement and steel walls set at various angles. Still, I would bet that every genre of music known to mankind performed there. The Omni hosted loud rock and roll, gospel, metal, and they were perfect. Rumor has it they brought their top producer, Gary Katz, along to assist with “tuning the room.” Another artist whose show was perfect: Stevie Wonder. His amazing songs and energy were incomparable. And, for showmanship, I remember standing on the floor at a Bob Seger concert as his sax player flew over our heads while hoisted to a cable from above. I had a 15-year-old niece who was a Billy Squire fan. I was lucky enough to get free tickets to his show and a backstage meet and greet. Billy opened for Queen, and Freddy Mercury’s group got the star treatment, which meant more hospitality space. We wound up on Billy’s tour bus. Here is this rocker dude who was as nice and polite as a southerner. We had fruits, Probably the best experience we ever had was sitting onstage with the Eagles. Yes, I said on stage. There were 12 of us. We were so close to guitarist Joe Walsh that he could give us all high fives. The afterparty backstage was anything but calm. I remember meeting Jann Wenner, the founder, and publisher of Rolling Stone magazine, along with Irving Azoff, the top dude at Frontline Management, the Eagles management company. As I said in the first article, I began my career in 1978, six years after the opening of the Omni. When the building closed in 1997, I was left with countless experiences over the 19 years of entertainment memories there. While putting this together, I had flashbacks of so many things I didn’t get to mention that there may be “The Omni, Part Two” column coming in future editions.

Above, Kelly McCoy with Steve Wonder and Motown Records representative James Bishop backstage at The Omni