April
2011
HAVE FUN CAMPING with the family
life with two
AUTISTIC CHILDREN local mother shares her story
Summer camps can teach CHARACTER and LIFE SKILLS PICK THE RIGHT CAMP FOR YOUR CHILD
Where the pieces of the PUZZLE come TOGETHER ... PROBLEMS TREATED INCLUDE: • ADD/ADHD • Depression & Anxiety • Oppositional & Defiant • Autism & Asperger’s • Learning & Academic Deficits • Divorce & Separation
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Table of Contents pg. 23-28 Summer Camp Guide
mom 2 mom 8 Loving the Child You Have 10 How to Throw a Greener Birthday Party 11 Camping with the Family
moms R women 2
Dear Readers, his has been a month of tests. Kayden, who will be 5 in May, has been trying my nerves. He’s talking back, being defiant, arguing and pretty much every other word out of his mouth is “no!” Ugh! Last night, I’m giving him a bath and he kept chewing on a plastic “saw tooth shark” toy he was playing with in the tub. I asked him to stop chewing on it. He said, “no.” So I told him if he put it in his mouth again, I was going to take it away. Five seconds later, it was back in his mouth. So I took it away and put it on the floor outside the tub. Of course, this made him angry so he started to cry and whine. I continued to bathe him and a few minutes later, he asked for the toy back. So I said, you can have it back, but if you chew on it again, it will be gone permanently. I give him the toy back, and take Camille out of the tub to dry her off. Kayden moves to the back of the tub and crouches over in the corner and starts chewing on the toy, again! He thinks he’s being sneaky and that I can’t see him! So I take the toy away and put it in the trash can in the bathroom. Of course this causes him to flip out! He says, “next time you
T
12 Five Consistent Breastfeeding Messages
letter from the editor
April 2011
leave for a meeting, I’m going in the trash can and taking my shark out!” Then he says, “I wish I didn’t have a mommy!” Ouch! The conversation continued to spiral downhill quickly. It didn’t result in anything nice. I realize I probably could have handled things differently, but in the middle of his blatant disrespect, I was so frustrated with him. It was the end of a long day of him being sassy and rude and I had had enough! How can my sweet, loving boy be so nasty?! Eventually he apologized and we talked about how he could have handled his anger differently. I’m sure this is a phase...and this too shall pass...but in the mean time, he is surely testing my patience. I think a lot of his behavior has to do with the changes in our home. Since my husband is laid off, he’s home all the time...and I’m working more. Amazing how much this change in routine and what they know as “normal” really affects them. We will all be happier when Daddy goes back to work!✲ Your Friend and Fellow MOM,
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know 2 grow 20 Play it Safe: Preventing Sexual Abuse 21 The Art of Apology, Teaching Kids the Power of “I’m Sorry” 22 Fun Easter Crafts for Kids
features 18 A Brother and Sister...and Their Life with Autism
Is your child the CUTEST KID IN TOWN?
also in this issue 3 5 6 14 17 26 29 30
editor’s note nana’s 2 sense life sentences her story just born business spotlight things 2 do resource guide
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April
MOM 2011
CEO/Publisher: Christopher Ognibene • (609) 670-1794 chris@superiorgx.com Executive Editor Adrienne Richardson • (856) 305-3490 adrienne@southjerseymom.com Director of Sales and Marketing Bill Wilson • (609) 280-1741 bill@superiorgx.com Marketing & Business Development Specialist Randi Bresalier • (856) 986-9606 randi@superiorgx.com For General Advertising Inquiries: randi@superiorgx.com (856) 986-9606 bill@superiorgx.com (609) 280-1741 chris@superiorgx.com (609) 670-1794 Production Manager Lisa Celfo lisa@southjerseymom.com Photograper Shirley Magilton info@shirleymagilton.com Contributing Writers Kris Bordessa, Laurie Davala, Jeanette Giza, Kate Hogan, Carolyn Leigh Kellerman, Victoria M. Lees, Fran LoBiondo, Michele Ranard, Judy M. Schneider, Kim Seidel Submit Calendar Listing: calendar@southjerseymom.com
Goose Poop K
ids and parents are really lucky these days. Play places, junior gyms, indoor water parks and mall play areas help fill the void on boring rainy days. I am sure my children feel they were deprived. Even if those places existed when my children were little, they were out of our recreation budget (which was zero). A free mall play area would have been a Godsend. I like to think I was a creative mom. I did try to take advantage of every free opportunity for my children to have fun. On our way home from shopping one spring afternoon, we passed the neighborhood car wash. Behind the car wash is a lovely little lake, backyard to some of the finer homes in town and a plethora of water fowl. The girls notice them first; a family standing in the green grass at the edge of the lake throwing bits of bread to the ducks and geese. “Mommy, can we feed the ducks?” Well, having just gone grocery shopping with a loaf of bread in the car, I say “sure.” We pull into the parking lot of the car wash, grab the loaf of bread poking out of the top of one of the brown paper shopping bags and head across the grass toward the lake’s edge. The other family is gone now, so we have the place to ourselves. The girls toss a few pieces of bread and are disappointed when the birds do not immediately come running. “Maybe that other family fed them so much they are full.”
nana’s 2 sense
South Jersey
“Be patient, it only takes one. The others will get nosey and come running.” One very cautious duck comes to nibble. Then another, then three, then a goose, then agh…we are surrounded.The ducks are polite but the geese honk and nip the air as they charge toward us. We all freeze and scream! Now I have always taken pride in thinking clearly in the midst of a “crisis.” I throw the bag of bread as far as I can into the gaggle of geese, grab the girls’ arms and yell “run!” We all run to the safety of the car, get in, close the doors and roll up the windows. It works. The birds go for the feast. We catch our breath, laughing; the littlest one half crying. The oldest and more fashion conscious whines, “Mom, ewe, my shoes.” Our shoes were covered with green-gray slime that could only be duck muck…goose poop! I still wonder how long that experience traumatized my girls. I will not take my grandchildren to feed the ducks. I will leave that fun to mom and dad. Happy Spring.✲
—Nana
Jean
Nana Jean is a South Jersey grandmother with two daughters and six grandchildren. Enjoy her stories about her 39+ years as a mom and 20 years as a grandmother as she shares her experiences and lessons learned with lots of laughs and tears along the way.
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On the COVER Cutest Kid In Town Winners: Michael, Matthew, Adam & Emily of Mt. Royal. Michael, 7, loves to help take care of his younger siblings. He’s a yellow belt in Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu and won first place in Board Braking. Matthew, 4, (the oldest and biggest of the triplets) loves Spider Man, playing COOTIES and anything YELLOW – his favorite color. Adam, 4, (the second born triplet) loves to play Super Mario Brothers on the computer, dance to Laurie Berkner songs and play dress up! Emily, 4, (youngest of the triplets) and the only little girl in the household, knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to go after it. She enjoys taking care of her brothers, helping mommy cook dinner and putting on makeup – but not dresses! Photo by Shirley Magilton Photography. Outfits provided by Too Too Cute Tutus in Margate, www.tootoocutetutus.com
] April 2011 | 5
life sentences
Work at Home Mom: Opus
T
he last time the phone rang at 5:15 a.m. to tell me that school was cancelled due to snow, I hung up and just lay there thinking: If I put the pillow over my face, will my kids forget I’m here? But I knew they’d find me, so I sent up a prayer for perseverance and got up. I work at home and if I waited for an empty house to do it, I would have missed every deadline since December. Erma Bombeck once said that having no place to work while her kids were home, she hauled herself and her typewriter into the playpen. After cooking and cleaning up two separate breakfasts, I called my mother. She’s 86 and lives alone in a senior village, but she’s quite active in her church, so I can only catch her when it snows.When it doesn’t, she is out delivering Communion to people in the nursing home or driving shut-ins to the doctor, or to daily Mass or out to breakfast. In January, Mom was on the front page of the Newark Star Ledger, watching as Governor
6 | April 2011
Interruptus
Christie spoke at an anti-abortion rally on the steps of the Statehouse in Trenton. “Every life is precious and a gift from God,” is the Governor’s quote. Mom is in the front row of a crowd shot, in her long puffy beige activist coat with her hood pulled up to protect herself from the Alaskan chill. Speaking of Alaska, on the last snow day of the season, I cleaned up my cluttered e-mail list and nearly deleted a note from my long-lost cousin Tom who lives in Alaska. He is the eldest of Aunt Mary’s nine children and my mother always felt close to him. “Such a good boy,” she would say. No matter what he did. I knew Mom would perk right up when I told her I heard from Tommy. “Oh, I’m always so happy to hear from any of the kids,” she said a little wistfully. Because that’s how she thinks of e-mail. It’s a great way to communicate with her far-flung family, but she refuses to learn how. Two of my brothers have tried to teach her, but the minute she pressed the wrong button, her work disappeared and she took offense. She is cagey about what happened to that computer.
Either she gave it to charity or it met with shameful misfortune By Fran LoBiondo on the concrete patio. Even a saint has intemperate moments. Although she did not learn to e-mail, she still uses it. She dictates her messages to my phone with a list of relatives I should send it to. “When you write Tommy back, you tell him I love him and I pray for him, even though I don’t get time to sit down and write to him.” After all, she’s 86 and the designated driver for her whole village.Who has time for social networking? Leave that to the stay-at-home mom. She’s not really working, is she?✲ Fran LoBiondo of Vineland has children in grade school, high school and college. A Purdue University graduate with a degree in Journalism, she has written about parenting, food and fun for 25 yrs.
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mom 2 mom By Laurie Davala
Loving the Child You Have
ith so much research supporting inborn temperament, the days of believing children are born as “blank slates” are long gone.Yet parents still struggle with the underlying belief that our children’s emotions, intelligence, behavior, preferences, etc. are all products of our parenting and fully under our control. Thus, we often find ourselves putting greater effort into changing characteristics we dislike in our children than into appreciating them as unique individuals. The reality, that each child enters the world with a blueprint from which all characteristics must stem, is both freeing and confining—freeing in that our parenting is not wholly responsible for our children’s every flaw and confining in that we can only work with what we have. Jane Nelsen, Ed.D. and coauthor of Positive Discipline for Preschoolers, says “one of the most beautiful ways of expressing love for a child is learning to love that child—not the child you wish you had.” So how do we push aside our deep-rooted expectations and achieve such an expression of love? The following suggestions provide a solid start.
W
Keep Perspective Every one of us has undesirable traits—stubbornness, defensiveness, impatience, negativity, over-sensitivity, under-sensitivity—traits we may spend a lifetime working on and never quite overcome. No matter how perfect our parenting, our children are human and come into this world with certain challenges they will continue to face for life, just like the rest of us. Be Realistic In How to Talk So Your Kids Will Listen, child and family therapist Dr. H. Norman Wright states that “every child is predisposed toward certain personality characteristics.” Making children who are genetically prone 8 | April 2011
to certain characteristics suppress and replace them, is somewhat like making children destined for shortness, tall.You can raise them on whole foods and exercise, but they will never reach six feet. That’s not to say we shouldn’t provide emotional sustenance to help hesitant children experience adventure or negative children see the positive, but we must recognize each child starts from a different place and with different wiring. Remember Self-Esteem If we put incredible energy into changing our children’s natural temperaments, their temperaments inevitably remain, but their self-esteem suffers as they watch us try hard to change them. Sharon Smith says her 5year-old daughter Marie complains daily of the slightest bump or bruise despite Sharon’s attempts to downplay their significance. Since this attention to minor details appears to be part of Marie’s temperament, efforts to change it likely leave her feeling misunderstood or weak. Accepting such traits as differences in personality, rather than as flaws, reduces damage to self-esteem. But take heart, most “weaknesses” have strengths on the flipside, and the child who obsesses over the smallest detail today may be the brain surgeon of tomorrow. Avoid Comparisons Thoughts like, “Whenever Jesse fails, he just works that much harder,” or “When I was a kid, I ate whatever was on my plate without complaining,” can hinder perspective-taking. Each set of genes and upbringing results in different strengths and weaknesses. Leadership expert Donna ThomasRodgers tried to impose who she was on her daughter for years before recognizing that her daughter entered this world with a personality nothing like her own. Once she accepted and nurtured her daughter’s Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
differences, their arguments virtually disappeared and the two at last grew very close (and needless to say, enjoyed each other far more!) Acknowledge Development Most of us avoid reprimanding our young children for not performing cognitively beyond their years, yet may be quick to judge them for developmentally normal behavior such as failing to share a prized possession. (By the way, how often do we share our prized possessions?) Unfortunately, the latter is at least as damaging, and while reading and math are relatively black and white, behavior has incredibly complex intricacies even adults never fully master. Learning that letters make certain sounds is far simpler, for example, than learning that it’s okay to spend considerable energy practicing to defeat others in soccer, but not to reveal your honest feelings about winning in their presence. Value Differences We all know to value diversity in others or in characteristics our children possess that we admire. But what about those talents or interests that just aren’t particularly important to us? What if we’re a family who values academics and one of our children pursues gardening? Judy Davids said her son Dylan developed a passion for video games and Pokemon cards, a distress to his father who preferred “real” sports. Though Judy did not understand his enthusiasm, she recognized it and enrolled him in animation classes. At age 17, Dylan got accepted into two universities with game design programs. His parents’ acceptance allowed him to use the potent combination of passion and talent to excel in a career he loves. Focus on the Positive Everywhere, we hear advice to catch our children behaving and to acknowledge them for it. Of course this is great advice, but can we take it a step further? Instead of looking for the positive as another means of improving our children, can we look for the positive to improve our view of them? When we focus on positives, we find that what we perceive as negative, matters to us far less and often fades away. Do Unto Others… Our children do not need parents who find and improve upon their every “flaw,” but who celebrate and foster their unique personalities and love them as they are. If our message gets through, they will learn from our example and accept others. And if we’re lucky, they might even grow up Loving the Parents They Have.✲ Laurie Davala, mother of two, formerly taught early childhood special education and now writes children’s books and parenting articles.
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April 2011 | 9
How to Throw a
Greener
Birthday Party recent survey of mothers with children under the age of 12 indicates that the majority are looking for ways to green their everyday lives, however, when it comes to planning parties and holiday get-togethers, many are not sure how to make the festivities eco-friendly. Dr. Nadereh Afsharmanesh, the Director of Sustainability at Earth Friendly Products, has developed a variety of sustainable birthday party tips that can work for kid and adult parties and even have applications for holiday parties, housewarmings and eco-friendly weddings. Her tips include:
A
Invitations: Consider a simple phone call to invite guests or purchase seed invitations, like the beautiful ones from Botanical Paperworks. After the party, the invitee can plant the invitation in his or her garden and have a living reminder of the beautiful party. Party Supplies: Forgo the expensive, disposable cartoon-covered cups and plates and use real dishes. The environmental impact of washing dishes with an eco-friendly dish detergent, is far less than adding a bag full of plastic cups and coated plates to landfills. Consider using an old sheet for a tablecloth; put out markers and allow the kids to decorate their place at the table. Decorations: Paper balloons are far more eco-friendly than Mylar or plastic balloons and last longer. Kids can also make their own “balloons” with eco-friendly bubble solution and large, reusable bubble wands. Use flower petals, colorful leaves or blossoms that you gather, rather than plastic or paper confetti. Who doesn’t want to be showered in flowers? Food: Don’t overdo it on the food. Kids are more consumed with playing than eating at parties. If you have leftovers, encourage guests to take them home rather than throwing them out. Put out pitchers of filtered water rather than individual bottles of water. The Cake: Nothing says love like home-baked goods. Baking the cake yourself allows you to control the ingredients and let your inner Julia Child shine through. Baking the cake yourself also saves a trip to the store, where the sheet cake will likely be encased in plastic packaging – and more expensive than a homemade confection. Games: Games don’t need to involve paper, plastic or other disposable items to be fun. Try “old fashioned” games like Red Rover and Musical Chairs for low-impact fun. 10 | April 2011
Party Favors: Rather than spending money on cheap, disposable dollar store items, consider one item with meaning and place it in a reusable fabric bag, not a plastic bag. Favors can be as simple as homemade baked goods, potted seedlings or seed packets or another small, well-made item that a child can cherish, like polished stones. Clean-up: Turn clean-up time into a game with kids after the party has ended. See who can gather the most dishes, sweep the fastest or pick up the most wrapping paper. Reward the participation with a family movie night to wind down the celebration. Remember to only use eco-friendly cleaning products to wipe up the party.✲
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Camping with the
Family
F
rom Highpoint State Park in one corner to the beaches of Cape May in the other, New Jersey offers much to experience when camping with the family. Whether they are hiking in the mountains, forests or enjoying sandy beaches, parents need to plan camping trips well. A few tips can make family camping fun. Start simple. Involve the children. And be patient. Parents should determine the type of camping experience wanted. Start simple by renting or borrowing campers, tents, cook stoves, sleeping bags or simply stay in one of the camping cabins at commercial campgrounds and some state parks. The idea is to know how to use the equipment taken. Families should start with overnight or weekend trips. An informative website to locate both commercial and state park campgrounds in NJ is www.newjerseycampgrounds. com. Parents should consider their children’s abilities when choosing activities and campgrounds. Commercial camps offer full service amenities: pools, game rooms, playgrounds, scheduled activities and showers. Primitive campsites provide no electrical hook-ups—no lights, no pool or showers, although there are toilets and sinks. Battery or propane lamps are needed. Whenever camping, bring flashlights and extra batteries. At most state forests, Park
By Victoria M. Lees Rangers lead programs and hikes for visitors so families can learn about their environment. Suggested activities while camping with young children include playgrounds, lazy lakes, farms and zoos. Hiking in the mountains or through forests should be reserved for older children. Start with a short hike, a half mile roundtrip. When hiking with children, parents need to make sure they know the type of terrain and the round trip, or full length, of a hike before starting. Parents can find this on trail maps or at visitor centers in the parks. Hikes are usually rated strenuous, moderate or easy. Double the suggested time given for a hike with children. This information will help parents decide if the children are up for the challenge. Stay on the trail and always bring lots of water and pretzels or saltines when hiking in the summertime. Hike in a single file as trails in the woods or mountains tend to be narrow. One parent leads while the other follows behind the children. Nobody sits on the sidelines when camping — it’s a family affair. Involve the children whenever possible, from where to camp
and which activities to do, to camp setup and clean-up teams. Everyone needs something to do. Children feel important this way. Pre-plan. Make up schedules as to who helps with meal preparation or washes dishes [there’s always a few]. Pack clothes that can be layered, short and long-sleeved shirts, sweatshirts, windbreakers. Bring lightweight long pants for hiking in the woods or mountains and quilted raincoats to keep the torso warm should rain be in the forecast. Don’t forget hats, bug spray and sunscreen. Be patient. Everything takes longer when camping: setting up camp, making meals, campfires—especially when children assist. Simple camping plans can lead to happy family campers.✲ Victoria M. Lees is a substitute teacher and freelance writer living in Stratford with her husband and five children. She has published nonfiction and fiction and placed in poetry contests. She graduated from the University of Pennsylvania cum laude in 2009 with a B.A. in English, Creative Writing concentration. Victoria currently maintains a blog about the trials and tribulations of Camping with Kids http://campingwithfivekids.blog spot.com.
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April 2011 | 11
moms R women 2
Five Consistent Breastfeeding Messages By Judy M. Schneider
F
rustrated new moms complain that “everyone tells me something different.” The more a mom hears about breastfeeding, the wider the diversity of information. This undermines the confidence of a mom…especially her first time breastfeeding. Conflicting information can drive a sleep-deprived, overwhelmed, foggy-brained mom to quit because she does not know what to do. Here are five consistent messages for moms before the first breastfeeding. Message 1: Breastfeed early and often. Breastfeeding is like a dance between mother and baby and they need support while they are learning the dance. A mother should know to breastfeed early and often. That means right after birth, baby should go to mom’s breast. Keeping mom and baby together skin to skin helps both “dancers” learn this normal, natural skill. The instincts for learning are strong right after birth when snuggled skin to skin with quiet time together. Various medical emergencies can keep this from happening immediately, but usually the crisis is brief. Mom and baby need to be together as soon as possible. The two new dance partners learn by practice. In the early weeks, baby needs an average of ten to twelve daily feedings. Message 2: Mom and baby should be comfortable. Mom and baby should be comfortable during the breastfeeding dance. Baby should open mouth very wide, like a yawn, so that one and one half inches of the pigmented tissue beyond the nipple is taken into baby’s mouth. Mom needs to hold baby very close. A well latched baby’s suck should feel “stretchy and tuggy,” not “pinchy and bitey.” It may take mom and baby some time in the early days to latch properly. If it hurts, then use your finger to release, then seek a wider, deeper latch so baby’s chin touches mom’s breast. Many moms need to be shown by a lactation consultant how to attain a deep, comfortable latch. When needing help for comfort, find help; do not suffer with a painful latch which may lead to more difficult problems. Message 3: Breast only until mom and baby are experts. It’s ideal to offer nothing but breast until mom and baby are experts. It’s best to avoid bottles and pacifiers, especially at first, since these may
12 | April 2011
confuse baby’s sucking and reduce mom’s milk supply. Mother’s milk alone is all most babies need, but reality is not perfect, so a family may face difficulties. Babies are sometimes given bottles for complications in birth recovery and for ongoing difficult circumstances. Problems latching can be created due to the introduction of bottles as a quick fix to latching or feeding issues. Avoid this if you can, but if life throws you breastfeeding challenges, find an expert who can help fix the issue. Message 4: Look for signs of plenty of milk. The number one reason mothers stop breastfeeding is because they think they don’t have enough milk. It’s critical that a new mom recognize the signs of plenty of milk. Signs of enough milk include: 1. Hearing swallowing sounds starting the second 24 hours. 2. Many wet diapers daily (after day 5, 5 to 6 disposables or 6 to 8 cloth). 3. By day 4, at least 2 to 3 daily yellow stools for first 4 to 6 weeks. 4. Baby is usually happy (all babies cry sometimes). 5. After a weight loss of up to 7 percent, back to birth weight by 10 to 14 days. 6. Normal weight gain of ½ to 1 ounce daily. Message 5: Call when you have questions. When you need help, seek it out immediately rather than waiting for things to get better. Call your pediatrician. Call your hospital’s lactation consultant. Hire a private lactation consultant or call La Leche League at 1-800-LaLeche. Helpful sites include www.lalecheleaguenj.org, www.kellymom.com and www.breastfeeding.com We all need help learning something new. Learn all you can about breastfeeding before the birth. Spend time around happy nursing moms. Every baby is different. You will know your baby best. Information may change, as new research changes the knowledge base in this rapid information-overloaded world, but breastfeeding does not change.✲ Judy M. Schneider, a Vineland native and resident of Pittsgrove is the breastfeeding expert for Cumberland and Salem Counties. A La Leche League Leader for 30 years and Board Certified Lactation Consultant since 1985, Schneider says breastfeeding is her passion. She also serves on the South New Jersey Breastfeeding Coalition and the New Jersey Breastfeeding Task Force.
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In their own words:
Parents of children with disabilities expect more from our schools, and they get it. We provide a host of unique services available in one location, tailored to each individual student.
“The staff tells us that he smiles and laughs from the beginning of every day to the end.� Our staff of New Jersey Department of Education certified special education teachers, licensed therapists and counselors provide expert instruction and support ... along with plenty of smiles.
“We know that the care and compassion they have for Joey extends far beyond the school day.� — Joe & Ann Marie DiCugno
We create a family-like environment where all children feel welcome and accepted.
“Joey has made great progress and we are so happy with the program.� Our staff can help answer your questions. To find out more about what programs may be right for your child, call us at
1-800-697-8555 —or visit our website at
Private special education is an option for many children, and provided at no cost to families. Finding the appropriate educational option for your child can sometimes be a complicated process. We have access to education and legal experts who can help you navigate through the process. For more information or for help in understanding your rights, call us at 1-800-697-8555.
www.privatespecialedsnj.com Brookfield Schools Garfield Park Academy Larc School Copyright
HollyDELL, Inc. Kingsway Learning Center St. John of God Community Services
2011 The Coalition of Southern New Jersey Private Special Education Schools
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April 2011 | 13
her stroy
Making Dreams Come True with the By Kate Hogan
N
icole Mayer has always believed in the importance of education, supporting those less fortunate than herself and freaky coincidences. In the past year, those three notions have propelled Nicole, and her husband Ryan, into the literary world and with any luck, will keep them there for a long time to come. In 2008, Ryan Mayer, a Cinnaminson police officer, was on leave for an arm injury. While convalescing at home, he decided to work on an adult mystery novel he had been conjuring in his mind. Ryan and Nicole’s four children, Alex, Hannah, Madison and Ava, decided they too, wanted to write a book. So Ryan and Nicole obliged and the Mayer family penned a story, drew some pictures and stapled it together – thinking that would suffice. Ryan’s oldest daughter Hannah had other ideas – she wanted a real, honest to goodness book. So Ryan really started thinking and contacted a friend, Russ Simmons, to do some illustrations. “I asked Russ to personify the letters of the alphabet, to make them characters,” said Ryan. Russ came back with some great concepts, so Ryan and Nicole sat down, developed a story line, added some educational points and exercises and from there, Alphabetown USA, Where is Ziggy? was born. At this point, they were still doing this for fun and just for their The Mayer Family family. The Mayers used an online service of Cinnaminson to have a copy of the book printed for each of their girls and a few others for family and friends. One day, Ryan was meeting Simmons at the mall to show him the book. Randomly, a woman came up to him, asked to see the book and inquired where she could get a copy. It was at this point that Ryan thought about trying to get the book published on a large scale.
AlpHABet
Unfortunately, life got in the way. Ryan went back to work and Nicole continued to raise their four children. For two years, publishing a book was never a consideration. In June 2010, Ryan was laid off from the police force and simultaneously, Nicole received a few emails from friends inquiring about “their book.” Although the thought had been shelved for two years, Nicole always felt the book needed to be published and at this point, really pushed her husband to inquire about submitting it for publishing. Nicole and Ryan had two more great ideas – to designate a portion of the proceeds to a specific charity and to submit it to the New York City Book Festival. Both ideas were a success. The Mayers collaborated for months with Alex’s Lemonade Stand and Where is Ziggy? won Honorable Mention at the festival. After that, one would think the Mayer’s would have publishers knocking down their door, and a few were, in fact, interested. However, they wanted the Mayers to dissolve the relationship with Alex’s Lemonade Stand and they wanted to have the illustrations redone. The Mayers felt that both of those requirements were out of the question and they decided to roll the dice and self-publish the book with their own savings. With a lot of support from family and friends, the Mayers have hit local street fairs, been endorsed by several South Jersey schools and initiated a large book donation program. To learn more about the book or to purchase a copy, visit www.alphabetownusa.org. With a little bit of luck, they will print their second Alphabetown USA book – Hannah’s Homework, in a few weeks and again, set the world of children’s literature on fire!✲
DOES YOUR CHILD STRUGGLE WITH SPEECH? u Therapy by an experienced professional that is
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PEARL SPEECH ASSOCIATES Sharon K. Pearl, M.A., C.C.C.-S.L.P. Licensed Speech Language Pathologist 18 Barclay Pavilion East, Cherry Hill, NJ (Located in the Barclay Farms Center on Route 70)
856.429.1505 14 | April 2011
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Need Help Fighting for Your Child’s Rights? Let Us Help...
MICHAEL I. INZELBUCH Attorney-at-Law • IEP Development • Due Process Hearings • Service Procurement Phone: 732.905.0325 Fax: 732.886.0806 Email: Michaelinz@aol.com Lakewoodlaw555@aol.com Member NJ & NY Bars
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April 2011 | 15
DOES YOUR CHILD’S MOOD GO DOWN…UP…DOWN…UP…DOWN? Too Sad
Too Happy
Low Energy Can’t Concentrate Loss of Interest Loss of Pleasure Feeling Worthless Sleeping Alot
High Energy Reckless Behavior MoreTalkative Feeling Grand Arguing /Angry Need Less Sleep
(Depressed)
(Manic)
If your child, 10 to 17 years of age, cycles in and out of depression and is currently depressed you may be interested in a research study of an investigational medication for bipolar depression in children. Qualified participants may receive at no cost study-related: Psychiatric Evaluations • Study Medication Follow-Up Visits Compensation for Time and Travel
ADULTS WITH DEPRESSION
Major Depressive Disorder Can Leave You Feeling Alone… Reach Out, We’re Here Major depressive disorder (MDD) takes a toll on both a person’s personal and professional life and can leave you feeling isolated and misunderstood. While there are may treatments available for MDD, finding the right medication with minimal side effects will likely take some trial and error.
STILL DEPRESSED EVEN THOUGH YOU ARE TAKING ANTIDEPRESSANT MEDICATION? You may be interested in a research study that is being conducted to evaluate an add-on investigational medication for people with Major Depressive Disorder (MDD). The study will last about one year. There are no placebos involved and you stay on an antidepressant. If you are 18 to 65 years old, currently experiencing depression symptoms and not responding well to treatment you may qualify to participate in this study. Qualified participants will receive study related: x Approved antidepressant medication plus x Investigational medication x Psychiatric and medical assessments x Follow-up visits Compensation for Time and Travel
For more information on these no cost clinical research studies call:
CENTER FOR EMOTIONAL FITNESS Cherry Hill, NJ
856-857-9500 (Extension 22)
Physicians in your area are conducting a clinical research study of a new investigational medication for people with MDD. To qualify you must be currently experiencing an MDD episode and have been successfully treated with an anti-depression medication in the past. Some study-related care including the study drug, laboratory and specialized tests will be provided to you at no cost. Compensation for time and travel may also be available.
16 | April 2011
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just born
Looking for the latest gadgets, toys, books or family related products? Look no further! Each month, we highlight the latest and greatest just for you. Take a look at these “just born” products and add them to your list of must haves!
VEGGIE TALES: TWAS THE NIGHT BEFORE EASTER DVD 6 THE BACKYARDIGANS: WE ARRRR PIRATES DVD The Backyardigans are setting sail with four exciting pirate adventures on this It’s Easter time in Crisper County and cable news reporter Marlee Meade is hunting for a brand new DVD. Preschoolers learn to mambo with Sinbad and become way to help others. On a tip that the old town theater will be shut down, Marlee cooks up heroes when they rescue King Pablo and his knights from the No-So-Nice a plan to save the stage and make a difference through the power of musical theater. But Dragon. Available where DVDs are sold, $16.99. when things go haywire, will it be curtains for Marlee’s dreams – or will she discover the true meaning of Easter and what helping others is really all about? Available where 7 TWISTED SISTA HAIR PRODUCTS DVDs are sold; $14.93. With little time to spare on complicated hair care at home, the products clean, nourish, protect, and style to meet the many hair care needs of busy, budget-minded and performBIRDKAGE STYLE APRONS ance-demanding women. Curly or straight, thick or thin, Twisted Sista’s high-performance Now we can all look stylish in the kitchen in our trendy birdkage style aprons! These super products can be used on all hair types and textures to create everything from effortless, stylish aprons are made from natural fabrics (linen and cotton canvas) and come in a vereveryday styles to sophisticated and sleek hairdos. Available at Target and satile array of patterns to accent any outfit. Matching tea towels available. A-Line, vintage Walgreens, prices vary. and full bib styles. In boutiques and at www.birdkagestyle.com; $42-55 for aprons and $22 for a set of two tea towels. 8 KRLY KIDS HAIR PRODUCTS The KRLY Kids line is for curly haired kids of all ages, as the products are extremely PLAY-DOH FLIP ‘N SERVE BREAKFAST PLAYSET gentle, moisturizing and easy to use. www.Ouidad.com; $12-15 Order up! This playset includes everything kids need to make their favorite breakfast foods. Mold pretend waffles, pancakes and eggs on the center “griddle” and watch as the 9 ALPHABET SQUIGGLE GAME “food” automatically flips over as it “cooks.” Swirl out “smoothies,” make “whipped Young children learn and improve letter recognition and handwriting while strengthening cream” topping, and create pretend extras like bacon and strawberries! Set includes four their vocabulary in a fun and creative way. Comes with a double-sided game board for 2-ounce cans of PLAY-DOH compound. Ages 3 years & up. Available at major upper and lower case letters. Ages 4-7. Available at Barnes and Noble; $19.99. retailers and www.HasbroToyShop.com; $14.99. 10 LIL BABY CAKES CROCS Looking for the perfect Christening gift for a new baby? Look no further than the “Jesus This spring, Crocs, Inc. is introducing several new men’s, women’s and kids’ styles that will Loves Me Diaper Cake.” This gorgeous 3 tiered diaper cake includes: 40 Pampers catch the eye of fashion savvy kids and parents. The new kids’ styles combine the comfort Swaddlers brand diapers, Gund musical lamb that plays “Jesus Loves Me”, Gund Jesus Crocs is known for with stylish twists kids love while the new women’s styles also keep the Loves Me wrist rattle and Gund Jesus Loves me plush. www.lilbabycakes.com; $69. Crocs comfort but will cause your fashion-forward moms to do a double-take when they 11 BLESSING BANK see the stylish new designs. www.crocs.com; all styles less than $35. The Blessing Bank is a modern piggy bank designed to teach kids to give back and help BERENSTAIN BEARS BOOKS others in need. The handmade keepsake banks are inspired by the biblical quote “it is In HERE’S THE CHURCH, HERE’S THE STEEPLE ($6.99), young readers will get to experimore blessed to give than to receive.” Available in handcrafted hardwoods for both boys ence one of their favorite rhymes through fun, liftable flaps that allow them to tour the and girls, hand-painted ceramic and also in a hammered, silver-plated option. Chapel in the Woods and its Sunday school. In GOSSIP GANG ($4.99), Sister Bear learns www.blessingbanks.com; $30. how upsetting gossip can be when the same friends she’s been gossiping with turn their gossip on her. Available at Borders, Barnes & Noble and other bookstores. 3 7
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April 2011 | 17
Caleigh, age 6 and Carter, age 9
I
never thought eleven years ago, when my husband and I got married, that I would be where I am today. I never thought I would have two kids on the autism spectrum,” says Patti Crockett of Millville. Patti’s son, Carter is now 9 and her daughter, Caileigh is 6. Both children are autistic. Both were born with no signs of autism and for the first few years, reached their milestones “on time.” At age 3, Carter began having meltdowns; however, these were not your normal temper tantrums. According to Patti, these “meltdowns” were temper tantrums times ten. Carter also had obsessions. He was first fixated on Blue’s Clues and Dora the Explorer’s backpack. Carter would wear the backpack everywhere, and if you tried to take it off, he would begin one his meltdowns. After some time, Carter began stimming. Stimming is a repetitive body movement that self-stimulates one or more senses in a regulated manner such as arm flapping, body spinning or rocking, lining up or spinning toys or other objects and repeating phrases. 18 | April 2011
SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS OF AUTISM • Problems with social interactions • Impaired verbal and nonverbal communication • A pattern of repetitive behavior with narrow, restricted interests • By age 1, most children should answer to their name more than half the time • Issues with textures
In December 2006, the family began noticing changes in Caileigh as well. They had just moved from Florida to New Jersey, but before leaving Florida, Caileigh received her MMR shot. “She wasn’t making eye contact anymore; she would just run from one thing to another. She was exhausting,” states Patti. Patti believes her autism has something to do with the MMR shot. According to Dr. Eric Dorn, a board-certified pediatrician at Advocare Pediatrics in Marlton, “there is no scientific basis for such a relationship between vaccines and autism.” Dorn says autism is diagnosed more frequently in boys than in girls, although the reason is unknown. “Some experts believe there may be a genetic component for that and also boys may be diagnosed sooner than girls because of some of their intrinsic behaviors,” explains Dorn. His advice for parents who think their child may have autism would be to be assertive with their pediatrician and to get the ball rolling with evaluations as soon as possible. “Nothing makes me feel better than to send a a child for further evaluation, and find out they do not have autism. I would rather be more cautious with developmental milestones and autism screening than less cautious.” The Crockett family was in need of medical advice when things began to take an arduous turn. Carter was 5 and they still didn’t have any answers for his actions. At the same time, their daughter Caileigh was becoming more demanding. Caileigh’s tantrums were now two hours long and included kicking and hitting about four to five times a day. She had trouble sleeping and would run out of the house. Caileigh had lost almost all of her language abilities and was mainly pointing to communicate with others. “All I wanted to do was lock myself in my room and never come out. I thought every day, how am I going to do this again tomorrow? I don’t think my family and friends knew exactly how bad it was for us or how depressed I was. I felt trapped and isolated,” explains Patti. The two children started receiving therapy from their school. According to Patti, Caileigh had an excellent intervention team at Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
the Millville public school. As soon as Caileigh began preschool, the intervention team approached Patti to evaluate her for autism. Patti admits at snapping back and saying, “She is not autistic. What mother wants to hear those words?” She did allow for the evaluation to take place though and since then, Caileigh has received, Occupational Therapy, Speech Therapy and Applied Behavioral Analysis with her and is making progress. At the same time, the family found a specialist for both children but had to wait a long time for an appointment. After meeting with specialists, Carter was diagnosed with Asperger’s with ADHD and Caileigh was diagnosed with Autism. It was at that point that Patti began to ask herself questions. “I just broke
down. Why me? What did I do wrong? I never drank or did drugs during either of my pregnancies. I felt like a total failure.” After some time, Patti got her confidence back and said to herself, “Ok, now I’ve got to get to work.” It has been a battle for Patti and her husband taking care of both children, however, things are more in control these days. Patti is so appreciative of Caileigh’s school. “If it was not for all the teachers and staff at the Child Family Center in Millville and our Behavioral Specialist, the principal, all the way down to the secretaries, my daughter would not be who she is today,” says Patti. “For the first time, my daughter told me she loved me.” “I love you” is a rare thing to hear from a child with autism.
Carter has been off and on medication and has recently been displaying more signs of stimming and scripting of television shows. They are now trying to make a decision whether or not he should be back on medication again. Patti looks forward to seeing what the future holds for their children and in the mean time, she has a team. “My husband is the best thing that ever happened to me, we are a team. Without him I couldn’t make it through this journey. They say more than 85 percent of parents with an autistic child get divorced; we are part of the 15 percent that are making it work!”✲
LOCAL HELP FOR PARENTS FACES Autism Support Network www.faces-autismsupport.org 609.412.3750 Autism Speaks www.autismspeaks.org 856.858.5400 Autism Society www.solvingthepuzzle.com 856.278.0798 New Behavioral Network www.newbehavioralnetwork.com 856.874.1616
The Center for Autism Research at The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia is looking for participants for a research study focusing on early brain development.
Who are we looking for? • Infant siblings of typically developing children • Infant siblings of children with autism
BANCROFT LAUNCHES RARE INCLUSIVE DAYCARE CENTER Little Butterflies, a new daycare center in Haddon Heights, is one of the only such programs locally designed for both children with autism and youngsters without developmental issues. Little Butterflies is operated by Bancroft, a leading nonprofit organization. www.southjerseymom.com
April 2011 | 19
know 2 grow
Play it Safe:
e s u b A l a u x e Preventing S by Kim Seidel
H
earing the chilling statistics on child sexual abuse can help caring adults become more aware and knowledgeable of this pervasive problem: One in four girls and one in six boys will be sexually abused before they turn 18. “We now know the only way to protect children is for parents to focus on preventing it, not waiting to react after the deed is done,” says Sax, author of Predators and Child Molesters: What Every Parent Needs to Know to Keep Kids Safe. MEASURES TO PROTECT YOUR CHILDREN Strive to raise assertive, confident children with a high sense of self-worth and self-esteem. “Such children are less likely to be targeted because they are more likely to say ‘no’ to a predator and more likely to report the incident,” Sax says. Educate yourself and take action in the following ways: Family, friends pose the greatest risk. Thirty to 40 percent of children are abused by people the family trusts. The greatest risk to children doesn’t come from strangers but from friends and family, Jeanne Meyer says, facilitator for the national project, Darkness to Light, a program that educates adults on child sexual abuse. A molester can be a priest, minister, teacher, coach, neighbor, friend or family member. “While it may be advisable to warn children of ‘stranger danger,’ I often remind parents that if they want to worry, they should worry about the people they know, as well as the ones they don’t,” Sax says. “To assume that we understand the heart and intent of every person in our lives is to turn a blind eye to the statistics.” Be aware of all adults in their lives. About 60 percent of abusers try to form a trusting relationship with parents. It’s common for single parents and busy parents to depend on help from other adults, Meyer says, but remain vigilant – even with close family members and friends. If your child goes to the movies or takes a trip with another adult, ask a lot of questions before and after to find out the details of the outing, she says. One-on-one relationships are valuable for children, but parents 20 | April 2011
need to ensure their child is not being taken advantage of. Check your state’s sex offender registry. By law, each state should have a database of all sexual offenders who have registered in the state. “As a parent, I suggest that you check whether any sex offenders reside near your home, your school, grandparents’ homes and other locations where your kids frequently hang out,” Sax says. “Be sure to share that information with co-parents, babysitters, nannies, grandparents, caretakers and anyone else responsible for supervising and caring for your children.” Beware of access, privacy. Sexually abusive acts do not occur in specific places but when two elements exist – access and privacy, Sax says. Predators seek opportunities to be with children – after school tutoring, giving rides home or paying a teen to do yard work. Sax advises, “Parents should ask themselves, ‘Why is this person willing – or even wanting – to spend so much time with my child?’” Trust your intuition. Rationalizing a sexual abuse situation is extremely common – and dangerous. “Our minds often don’t want to go ‘there’ to the possibility that this person is an abuser,” Meyer says. “We need to recognize and accept what we feel and see in situations.” Many times people don’t report a highly trusted and visible individual for fear of ruining his reputation. “I would rather inconvenience the life of one adult than devastate the life of a child,” Meyer says.✲
Communicating with your child about sexual abuse There is no “magic age” to begin safety discussions with your children to help prevent sexual abuse, says Sax. These talks should be part of your parenting as soon as you determine your child can understand what you’re talking about. Depending on their ages, it can be helpful to talk to your children together about sexual abuse. “Siblings can then hold each other accountable and help to keep one another safe,” says Meyer. “They can warn, ‘Remember what mom told us?’ Children can place expectations on one another.” Parents must discuss with their children that their body is their own and that nobody can touch them without their permission, Sax says. Emphasize that “no” means “no” and that anybody who refuses to respect that should be considered dangerous and reported to the police. Other topics to discuss include: getting a grown-up before answering the door in your home; knowing whom to approach if lost (such as another mommy); and learning what to scream if someone attempts an abduction (“You are not my Dad! Help!”). Keep the lines of communication open. “We need to let our children know that they can come to us any time, without fear or embarrassment,” Sax says. “If they have been touched inappropriately, they should know that it’s never their fault.” Childhelp is a national organization, staffed 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Phone calls are kept confidential at 800-422-4453. Darkness to Light Stewards of Children prevention program is offered regularly throughout the country. For more information, contact www.darkness2light.org. Robin Sax offers information at www.robinsax.com.
Kim Seidel is a wife, mother of two daughters and an awardwinning writing on parenting issues. Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
The Art Of Apology Teaching Kids the Power of By Michele Ranard, M.Ed.
“I
’m sorry.” Such lovely syllables requiring so little of us, yet so HUGE in their impact. Lately I feel as if I am a broken record with my teen son. No matter what daily dramatic social dilemma he comes home and recounts after school, I hear my stressed voice whispering “If you had just apologized immediately, you could have saved yourself so much grief.” His anger was apparent in his reddened face recently as he ranted about a scolding from his English teacher (undeservedly, he says) for omitting the date on an assignment. He was filled with righteous indignation the other day following a heated scuffle after an accidental tripping of an uncoordinated bully in P.E. And, I can attest to the intensity of a virtual kitchen death match which ensued when his older brother discovered his Aqua Man shirt was worn without permission. So much hostility and anger and so much resistance to resolve it peacefully! When We Resist Apology As a professional counselor, I understand well how unresolved conflict can fester. Relationships become fractured and strained. Sometimes we turn our anger inward resulting
in depression and anxiety. Or the anger is directed outwardly in the form of violence, abuse or misbehavior. Clinical psychologist Henry Cloud, in Changes that Heal reminds us that “We must learn to use our symptoms as signs that lead us to issues. Issues can be resolved; symptoms cannot. If we resolve the issues, the symptoms will no longer have a reason to be.” Often, an apology and submission is a step toward resolving such issues and restoring relationships. Apologies are especially challenging for my son in his present state of emotional development. The very thought of submission (which causes his eyes to roll) makes him feel vulnerable given the invisible armor he feels he must pile on daily for high school. A Five Gallon Container How can we as parents help our tweens and teens more deeply appreciate the power of apologies? Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas, authors of The Five Languages of Apology: How to Experience Healing in All Areas of Your Relationship, stress that apologies are important, because without them, our anger builds and pushes us to demand justice.
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When one’s sense of right is violated, that person will experience anger. He or she will feel wronged and resentful at the person who has violated their trust. In their book they propose genuine forgiveness to remove the barrier created by the offense. It’s forgiveness which re-opens the door to trust. The conscience, these psychologists say, is like a five-gallon container strapped to your back. Each time you wrong someone, a gallon of liquid is poured into the container. The weight of even a few gallons quickly grows uncomfortable. Yet the great news is that the container can be emptied simply through apology. Five Steps Thomas and Chapman remind us “Something within us cries out for reconciliation when wrongdoing has fractured a relationship… Genuine forgiveness removes the barrier that was created by the offense and opens the door to restoring trust over time.” They suggest five steps in order to offer a genuine apology: 1. Give voice to your regret: “I am sorry.” 2. Accept Responsibility: “I was wrong.” 3. Make restitution: “What can I do to make it right?” 4. Express repentance: “I’ll try not to do that again.” 5. Request forgiveness: “Will you please forgive me?” Upon stringing together the first letter of each step I noticed the acronym GAMER emerges. If you are parenting a tween or teen, perhaps this fun discovery will mean something to you as it does to me! Gamer is definitely an identity my Xbox obsessed son embraces, this adds another layer. I plan to tack this list to the refrigerator as a reminder of the power of apology not just for him, but for all of us. Let’s face it. Our kids need to see us modeling these steps. Learning the art of apology is a lifelong process, but knowing that improving this skill can heal relationship fractures, lighten our load and make every day more joyful is more than enough reason to pursue it with passion.✲ Michele Ranard is a mother of two teens, a professional counselor, and a freelance writer with blogs at cheekychicmama.blogspot.com and hellolovelyinc.blogspot.com..
April 2011 | 21
Fun Easter Crafts for Kids By Kris Bordessa
EGGS ROCK: • Thoroughly wash an assortment of rocks. • Dry rocks overnight. • Paint rocks with a base coat of acrylic paints. • Add decorative details using different colors of paint and an assortment of tools such as toothpicks dipped in paint to make tiny dots, cotton swabs to make bigger dots and fine point brushes to make stripes. You can even use paint pens to add names to your “eggs.” Kris Bordessa writes regularly about family activities. Her latest project is Attainable Sustainable: Reviving the Lost Art of Self-Sufficiency. Join her online at www.attainable-sustainable.net.
22 | April 2011
YARN EGGS: • Mix equal parts glue and water in a disposable, shallow container. One-eighth cup of each will do two eggs. • Cut cotton yarn into three foot-long lengths, about 10 for each egg. Use various colors or try it with multicolored yarn. • Blow up a balloon to a 3-4” diameter and cover work area with newspaper. • Place a 12” piece of waxed paper on top of the newspaper. You’ll need to set the balloon on it as you work. • Dip lengths of string, one at a time, into the glue mixture, making sure to hold onto one end of the string. • Wrap dipped strings around balloon, randomly overlapping and tucking loose ends under. Continue adding layers until the balloon is evenly covered. • Hang yarn covered balloons and dry overnight using a clothespin on the balloon’s tied end. Make sure to protect the area below the hanging balloon with newspaper as it will drip. • Once string is completely dry, carefully poke a hole in the balloon and pull the balloon away from the string as the balloon deflates.
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JCC Day Camps
For Ages 2-5 Located: Katz JCC 1301 Springdale Road • Cherry Hill • Adult Head Counselors • Creative Arts and Music
For Ages 3-14 Located: 400 Tuckerton Road, Medford
• Excellent Staff Ratio
• Sports Clinics • Creative/ Performing Arts • Boating/Fishing • Ropes Course • Daily Lunch & Snacks
• Lenny Krayzelburg • Weekly Themes and Events Swim Academy • Imaginarium Climbing • Extended Day and Play Structure • Daily Lunch • Sports and Games & Snacks • Indoor/Outdoor Pools
• Water Play Park • Lenny Krayzelburg Swim Academy • Excellent Staff Ratio • Extended Day • Free Transportation
JCC Camps at Medford
OPEN HOUSE
OPEN HOUSE
Sunday, May 1 • 10:00 am – 1:00 pm
Sunday, April 3 • 11:00 am – 2:00 pm
at the Katz JCC
at the Medford Camp Site
For more info please call 856-424-4444 x1242
For more information please call 856-751-1666
www.katzjcc.org
www.jcccampsatmedford.org
Katz JCC, Cherry Hill
Early Childhood Camps at the Katz JCC
Ask About Our 1 Week SPECIALTY CAMPS Sixers Basketball Camp Sixers Dance Camp
Challenger British Soccer Camp
www.sixerscamps.com
www.challengersports.com
Eagles Non-Contact Football Camp www.philadelphiaeagles.com www.southjerseymom.com
April 2011 | 23
summer camp guide
Summer Camps Can Teach CHARACTER and LIFE SKILLS
M
ore and more parents are looking for summer experiences for their kids that go beyond traditional camp activities. Already, families are planning for this summer, looking for programs that help kids build strong character and life skills to help them succeed in school and in life. Bobbi DePorter, accelerated learning and teen motivation expert, can help parents pick a summer camp that will make a real difference in your child’s life. Bobbi is founder of SuperCamp, the nation’s elite learning and life skills program with more than 56,000 graduates in the U.S., Europe, Asia and Latin America. Here’s a summer camp quiz for parents:
there’s far more downtime and unstructured free time than quality enrichment. is the staff’s training and expertise? 2. What If a summer program bills itself as providing new skills, research the background of staff who will teach these skills. Are the program leaders teachers themselves or experts in a particular field? What training do they have? a balance between learning and 3. Isfun?thereA good summer enrichment program gives students the feeling that they’re at camp, while incorporating fun into the learning. does the program enrich a student’s 4.How life? Look for programs that offer students growth in life skill areas that build their confidence, motivation and selfesteem, as well as communication and leadership skills to help them grow in school and in life.
enrichment activities have any practi1. Do cal application to your child’s academic future? Some camps position themselves as “enrichment programs” when, in reality, they are glorified and expensive vacations for kids. Before signing up, take a good look at the program’s schedule of activities. Close inspection may reveal
have limited value. Day camps don’t have the same impact as residential enrichment camps, where students get to stay onsite for the duration of the program. “Sending your son or daughter to the right summer enrichment program can pay longterm dividends for the entire family,” DePorter says. “Newly acquired academic skills, increased motivation or added confidence can translate into better grades, as well as new academic and personal interests. In turn, this growth can lead to better colleges, college scholarships and rewarding careers.”✲ Teen motivation and accelerated learning expert Bobbi DePorter has changed the lives of over 5 million kids through her SuperCamp and Quantum Learning school programs. SuperCamp is a learning and life skills summer program with more than 56,000 graduates in the U.S., Europe, Asia and Latin America. DePorter is author of more than a dozen books, including The Seven Biggest Teen Problems and how to turn them into Strengths (An Insider’s Look at What Works with Teens).
long is the session? A program 5. How that runs three or more weeks may be excessive and expensive. On the other hand, camps that last just a few days will
Little Lamb Preschool Summer Day Camp • Age group 2 yrs. old – to entering 1st grade • Hands on activities incorporated through weekly themes • Two large fenced play areas • Air conditioned facility • Highly qualified & experienced caregivers • Flexible scheduling: 3 or 5 days available
Nature • Music • Crafts • Water Play • Ice Cream Truck Skits • Snacks Provided • Special Visitor and Events
THE BEST DAY CAMP VALUE IN SOUTH JERSEEY!
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SUMME MER ER DAY AY CAM AMP
FOR BOYS & GIRLS ENTERING K-10TH GRADE ͻ ^t/D > ^^KE^ ͻ ' D ^ ͻ Z d/s Zd^ ͻ &/ > dZ/ /W^ ͻ ^W / >dz DW^ ͻ d, /' s Ed
Call for a tour today (856) 692-5390 Serving the Community for Over 26 Years! 1005 E. Wheat Road • Vineland, NJ 08360 24 | April 2011
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235 E. Red Bank Ave, Woodbury, NJ 08096 ϴϱϲ͘ϴϰϱ͘ϬϳϮϬ ͻ ǁ ǁǁ ǁǁ͘LJŵĐĂŐůŽĐŽ͘Ž Ž ƌŐ Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
Philly’s, South Jersey’s and the Shore’s #1 Choice for Summer Camp
Saturdays April 9 & May 21
• swim lessons • horseback riding • ceramics • archery • sports • rope courses Transportation, • nature • extended care Lunch & Snack • tennis • gymnastics provided • crafts • teen program with travel (peanut aware) • dance • half or full day, 3 & 4 year olds • drama • a/c buildings For registration rates and fees go to our website • golf • a/c vehicles • woodshop • free camp shirt
FULL DAY CAMPS Mon–Fri + 9:00am–3:30pm Boys/Girls + 7–13 years old
FULL DAY CAMPS Mon–Fri + 9:00am–3:30pm Boys/Girls + 7–13 years old
LITTLE SIXERS DAY CAMPS Mon–Fri + 9:00am–11:45am Boys/Girls + 5–7 years old
MINI DAY CAMPS Mon–Fri + 9:00am–11:45am Boys/Girls + 5–7 years old
OVERNIGHT CAMPS One and two week sessions available Boys/Girls + 9–17 years old
OVERNIGHT CAMPS Ages 9–17 years old
+ Meet Sixers Players, Coaches & other NBA Stars! + Learn the drills the pros use
+ Meet the Sixers Dancers! + Let the Divas of Dance teach you the latest moves.
Call today 856-262-3900
eh, better keep it movin’. I’ve got things to do & places to be... SAM PLAYCARE is just that exact place to be! Are your little ones too young for day camps & too big to be just sittin’ around all summer long? Are you looking for a safe, fun, and creative haven for your little ones this summer, while their big brother & sister are attending day camps? Well, Sports & More listened to your requests! We have now added a Brand New Playcare Center for kids ages 2-4 for the entire summer! And to top that, the playcare program will be extended into the fall. Full or half day options available.And as always, Sports & More provides only professionally trained staff. You can rest assured that your little guy or gal will be in good hands. Call for more info and be sure to visit one of our open houses! Camp runs from June 22–September 2, 9am–4pm, before/after care available. Flexible scheduling: 3 or 5 days. SAM Playcare, the newest addition to our awesome summer program, provides full or half day childcare for ages 2 thru 4 years all summer long & into the fall! of . . . ins
ide
Open Houses: Join us between 1-4 pm April 9 • May 7 • June 11 www.southjerseymom.com
1855 Hurffville Road, Sewell, NJ 08080 856.401.8111 www.sportsandmorefun.com April 2011 | 25
business spotlight
Patiently Building CHAMPIONS By Kate Hogan
ccording to the philosophies of the Universal Soccer Academy in Lumberton, New Jersey there are five “pillars” that define a champion soccer player: technical skill, tactical awareness, physical power, mental toughness and character. Apparently, they know what they are talking about! Currently, three of their students are playing for the United States National Soccer Team and one of those players is Carli Lloyd of Delran. For those of you unfamiliar with the name, Carli Lloyd scored the only goal in the 2008 Olympic Gold medal match against Brazil…in overtime. Ms. Lloyd openly credits her trainer, James Galanis as her biggest influence. Mr. Galanis is the founder of Universal Soccer Academy. “The Universal Soccer Academy specializes in the development of serious soccer players who want to go on to play in college and then become professionals,” says Galanis. The Academy’s main curriculum is the Full Time Player Program (FTPP), a year round regimen which requires an approved evaluation. “We look for players who have potential and passion for the game of soccer. A player has to have passion for the game in order to be committed to the practice that needs to be done.” The FTPP builds a soccer player patiently. For the first seven months of the program, coaches from the U.S. develop the individual skills of each player — making sure their soccer skills are crisp. During the final four months, players participate in micro games to transfer all the skills
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they have previously developed into a game setting. Currently, there are fourteen players in the FTPP representing New Jersey or the United State’s Olympic Development Program. In addition to the FTPP, Universal Soccer Academy offers several other programs. The Summer Youth Camp offers 1, 2 or 3 weeks of camp for kids age 9-16. Each week of camp is devoted to developing an area
Join the BEST Soccer Academy in the USA • Small but prestigious soccer school Carli Lloyd, USA Womens National Team
• Recognized internationally • True producer of elite soccer players • Accepting minimal amount of students to ensure all programs are effective • Programs improve all students, leading to peak performance on their teams!
USA Womens Heather Mitts, National Team
Medford, NJ
609.254.0335 www.universalsocceracademy.com info@universalsocceracademy.com 26 | April 2011
crucial to the game of soccer – juggling, dribbling, footwork, receiving, passing and shooting. Although players may choose to attend camp for individual skill development, major advancements come from the participation in all three weeks as each theme builds on one another. The High School Prep Camp is for players looking to prepare for their upcoming high school season. During the two week camp, all five pillars of a champion are developed and put to the test. The Academy’s Youngstar Camp offers year round classes for children age 5-8. Children are encouraged to develop the basic skills of soccer, as well as confidence in themselves in a fun and energetic environment. If you or someone you know has what it takes to be a champion soccer player, go to www.universalsocceracademy.com for more information.✲ Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
!
All Kids First SUMMER CAMP Gets All E's for EXCELLENT! An Exciting and Enriching program full of Enjoyable Exploration..
!
Open House Dates: Sunday, April 10 Sunday, May 15 1:00pm-3:30pm
!
!
NOW Enrolling: Ages 8 wks - 5 yrs
! Extended Hours – No Extra Charge
www.greattimesdaycamp.com
1385 Magnolia Road Vineland, NJ 856.405.0711 www.allkidsfirstnj.com
Our program is Energizing and Encouraging! Children Engage in various activites. Different theme each week. An Enthusiastic Environment at All Kids First!
BGCCC SUMMER
CAMP SUMMER2011
www.southjerseymom.com
Monday, June 27th – Friday, August 19th Days Monday – Friday 9am to 5pm Early drop-off at 8am and late pick up until 6pm. Available for an additional charge. NEW this year – Specialty Sports Camp Monday, August 22 – Friday, September 2 Open to all children 6-12 years old Counselor in Training program for 13-14 year olds Visit www.begreatcamden.org for more info
fantastic summertime fun Sports Camp Features – Tennis, Baseball, Golf, Basketball, Swimming and much more…For all levels of athletic ability.
856.966.9700 X235 & ask for Tyra Walls www.begreatcamden.org Licensed by State of New Jersey
April 2011 | 27
THE GYMNASTICS AND CHEERLEADING ACADEMY
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Camps Hockey & Skating ng nti Pla Special Activity
LIBERTY LAKE SUMMER DAY CAMP Liberty Lake is the place to be for ages 4-15; transportation available in Camden & Burlington Counties. CAMPERS create their own schedules, guaranteeing the BEST SUMMER! Tours available daily. Conveniently located just off Rte 295 (exit 52A). www.liberty lakedaycamp.com, (609) 499-7820. ENCHANTED DREAMS Haddonfield Voted Best Children's Party in South Jersey. Summer Princess Camp! A different Princess attends each magical week! Choose your favorite. Dressup, crafts, music, dance, tea parties. Making memories to last happily ever after! Ages 3 & up. (856) 429-9909, www. enchanteddreams.biz
28 | April 2011
Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
For a complete list of events, log onto www.southjerseymom.com
To submit your event, send an email to calendar@southjerseymom.com. Entries are due six weeks prior to the event and are filled on a first come first serve basis. Space is limited.
ATLANTIC COUNTY Atlantic City Boardwalk Rodeo April 1-3 Come watch bareback horse riding, tie-down roping, saddle bronc riding, team roping, barrel racing, steer wrestling and bull riding. Tickets $16$102. Family four packs are available for $79 and include four $31 tickets, four hot dogs and four soft drinks. Tickets can be purchased at the Boardwalk Hall Box Office and all Ticketmaster locations. Cirque Du Soleil Algería APRIL 6-10 Alegría really means joy, cheer, happiness. Cirque Du Soleil presents Happiness as a state of mind for this amazing show. Atlantic City Boardwalk Hall, 1-866-881-5373
BURLINGTON COUNTY Coppelia April 9 & 10 Join VBT for the debut presentation of the comic ballet, Coppelia. Set in a peasant village, the story of Coppelia follows an eccentric dollmaker, Doctor Coppelius, and his life-size dancing doll, Coppelia. Voorhees Middle School Theater, Holly Oak Rd., Voorhees. Adults $15, Children under 12 yrs, $12. To purchase tickets call (856) 753-2908 or visit www.voorheesballettheatre.com Stoy School Fair April 30 from 12 to 5 p.m. Featuring a huge Chinese auction with more than 60 baskets, 50/50, lots of games, pie-eating contest, moon bounce, dunk tank, dancers, magician, photo booth, nail/hair spa, book sale, food, and more. Raffles include: Phillies tickets, American Girl doll, and lots more. Contact Doreen DeCristofaro at (609) 334-9791. Stoy School, 206 Briarwood Ave, Haddon Twp.
CAMDEN COUNTY Button’s Birthday Bash April 16 to May 1 Who’s coming to a celebration big enough for a hippo? The Backyardigans™ that’s who… and you too! Celebrate Button’s 12th birthday and boogie down to some seriously www.southjerseymom.com
fun live kids’ music, shake it at the dance party, see Button and Genny devour gourmet “cakes slices” sing happy birthday, pose with a giant birthday cake and much more. Adventure Aquarium, 1 Aquarium Dr, Camden. $22.95 for Adults; $17.95 for Children 2-12. (856) 365-3300 or www.adventureaquarium.com. Dino Day & Bug Bonanza Festival April 9 & 10 Celebrate dinosaurs and insects while digging for fossils in our popular Dino Garden. This festival includes educational activities, a fun planting activity, and themed crafts. $6 for adults; $5 for children (3-11). Camden Children’s Garden, 3 Riverside Dr, Camden. (856) 3658733 or camdenchildrensgarden.org Godspell April 1 & 2 at 8 p.m. Godspell, the ground-breaking, Tony-Award winning musical based on the Gospel of Matthew offers a contemporary portrayal of Jesus’ teachings. The cast reenacts parables through song and energetic choreography. Mainstage Center for the Arts is located at Dennis Flyer Theatre, Camden County College, Blackwood. $13 for seniors/students and $16 or $21 for adults. www.mainstage.org or (856) 227-3091. Charity Auction April 16 at 5:30 p.m. Over 100 quality items will be auctioned including vacation and golf packages, sports tickets and memorabilia, restaurant and theater gift certificates, artwork, furniture and more. Free hors d’oeuvres served. Proceeds benefit The Saints Prison Ministry. (856) 866-9428 or www.saintsprisonministry.org. Live Auction begins at 6:45 p.m. Collingswood Community Center, 30 W. Collings Ave., Collingswood. Understanding Grief April 7 at 6 p.m. The Samaritan Center for Grief Support announces a free grief support group for those grieving the loss of a family member or friend. While there is no charge, pre-registration is
required by calling (800) 596-8550. Samaritan Center for Grief Support, 5 Eves Drive, Ste 180 in Marlton. www.samaritanhospice.org. Holy Eucharist MOPS presents Easter Family Fun! April 17 from 12:30 to 2:30 p.m. Egg hunts, My Gym Moon Bounce, face painting, crafts, pizza, drinks, desserts. Rain or Shine. Holy Eucharist Parish Center, 344 Kresson Rd, Cherry Hill. $5 in advance, $6 at door. Call Maria (609) 922-2024 or www.hemops.com. (MOPS = Mothers of Preschoolers) www.mops.org.
CAPE MAY COUNTY 35th Cape May Jazz Festival April 8-10 Great jazz bands, food and more. Tickets $25-135. For more info visit www.capemayjazz.org.
CUMBERLAND COUNTY Miss Kathy’s Tale Spin Stories Every Tuesday in April at 10:30 a.m. Miss Kathy brings over 25 years of theatrical experience to the FREE Tale Spin Stories, a complement to her many years of teaching drama, art, literature and history across all grade levels. With a colorful wardrobe enhanced by eccentric jewelry selections and vintage hats, Miss Kathy creates a story time experience that introduces children to social, listening and interactive skills each week. Cumberland Mall, Center Court, Routes 47 and 55, Vineland. Tales From the Vine: I AM Legacy April 14-16 at 7 p.m. Come check out this wonderful Easter Play at Calvary Chapel of Vineland. 930 N Main Rd, Vineland. $5/person. Appropriate for adults and children ages 7 and up. For tickets or more information call (856) 696-9409 or visit www.ccvineland.org.
things 2 do
April Calendar
Dr. Melissa Josselson will explain the science behind stress and offer solutions to stress related health problems at this free educational event. Vir tu, 239 Hurffville Cross Keys Rd, Suite 130, Sewell. These events are free and open to the public, but seating is limited. Reserve your spot by visiting virtua.org or call 1-888-Virtua-3.
Angels of God Yard Sale April 2 from 8 a.m. to 1 p.m. To help defray the cost of running the Clothing Closet and to purchase diapers and other needed items for those in need, Angels of God is asking for your help. Do you have items you are looking to get rid of? They are accepting donations of items in good condition for the yard sale. Items can be dropped off March 31, 9a–12p & 4-7p and again on April 1, 5-7p (856) 625-8652 or email angels@angelsofgod.org. Angels of God, 334 South Broadway, Pitman. www.angelsofgod.org. Cinderella April 14-16 Live Children’s Theatre. $7/person. Broadway Theatre of Pitman, (856)384-8381.
SALEM COUNTY Tri-State Dog Show & Pull April 16 & 17 Salem County Fairgrounds. 735 Rt. 40, Woodstown. (646) 316-1376. 10th Anniversary Gala and Silent Auction, “The Masquerade Ball” April 16 from 6:30 to 11 p.m. Entertainment by The Chatterband, Catered by DiPaolo’s Italian Ristorante. Formal Attire - Masks Provided. To become a sponsor or for ticket info call (856) 351-2601. Salem Community College Davidow Hall, 460 Hollywood Ave, Carneys Point.
GLOUCESTER COUNTY Solutions to Stress-Related Health Problems April 5 from 6 to 7 p.m. Everyday stress affects your physical, mental and emotional wellbeing, but did you know that it also causes a large number of health issues?
April 2011 | 29
resource guide
FOR THE HOME ARE YOU REDECORATING AND NEED HELP CHOOSING THAT PERFECT WALL COLOR AND FINISH? I can create a beautiful finish that fits your style and budget and bring your ideas to life. Hand-painted scenes, kids' rooms, baby nurseries & fine decorative finishes. Free estimates. Lori Gallo, Paint Impressions, (609) 254-9695 or loridesign@comcast.net. Fully insured; Licensed #13VH06058300.
GIFT IDEAS
GREAT PERSONALIZED GIFTS FOR ALL AGES At JUST FOR LITTLE PEOPLE (and others, too!) we specialize in new baby gifts both hand-painted or embroidered. Beautifully wrapped and available for pick-up at our new Gibbsboro location, or we can ship it for you. Call (856) 627-8901 or check out www.justforlittlepeople.com.
PARTIES ARTY PARTIES Abrakadoodle CUSTOMIZED Arty Parties are perfect for BIRTHDAYS, SPRING CELEBRATIONS, SCHOOL OR SCOUT EVENTS. All artwork FRAMED – the best PARTY GIFT ever! Hosted at your location; we provide ARTFULLY FUN teacher, materials & frames. Visit www.abrakadoodle.com/nj01 or call (856) 914-0521. BOWLING BIRTHDAY PARTIES AT MEDFORD LANES Children age 4 to 12 love Bumper Bowling! Bumper rails keep the ball heading to the pins. We have light balls, custom mini ramps and you can bring your favorite food. (609) 654-4021 or visit www.Medfordlanesnj.com for more info.
PEDIATRIC OCCUPATIONAL THERAPY NEED HELP GUIDING YOUR CHILD’S DEVELOPMENTAL JOURNEY? At The Schlinic, happy childhoods are our specialty. Kids come for awesome motor equipment, fun sensory experiences and developmental play. Parents come for answers, professionals who listen, assessments and research-supported intervention. Learn more at www.schlinic.com or call Dr. Jodi at (856) 692-9292.
New Toddler Program Opening September 2011
POSTPARTUM CARE TENDER MOMENTS MOM CARE Postpartum Doula, Mary Kling provides a helping hand for new moms. Providing in-home newborn education, breast feeding support, laundry, meal preparation, infant massage and a listening ear. Contact Mary at (856) 889-9800 or www.tendermomentsmomcare.com. Certified with DONA.
NAUDAIN ACADEMY
APRIL
Giveaways!
H Philadelphia Soul Tickets H Veggie Tales: Twas the Night Before Easter DVD H Berenstain Bears Books: Here’s the Church, Here’s the Steeple and Gossip Gang
A Montessori School • • • • •
Individualized curriculum Enrichment programs Half, full and all day programs Trained Montessori teachers State licensed, non-profit facility
• Two administrators on-site • Enrolling now for 2011-2012 school year • Ages 1 1⁄2 - Kindergarten • We offer a summer enrichment program
Naudain Academy 6 School Lane Voorhees, NJ 08043
Visit www.southjerseymom.com to enter to win these prizes 30 | April 2011
856-751-1510 www.NaudainAcademy.com
Family owned and operated non-profit organization Founded in 1977 Opened and still owned by Leddy M. Naudain
Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter
WHERE LEARNING MEETS CARING ONE CHILD AT A TIME
S CLASSE ST P FA U G IN FILL
G 2010 1 SPRIN 0 .691.76 Enroll for Summer Sessions and Camp Now!
856
ERS VOUCH
ED ACCEPT
For Ages 0-13 years INFANTS • TODDLERS • PRE K. • BEFORE & AFTER SCHOOL NIGHTS & WEEKEND CARE AVAILABLE
1940 Southwest Blvd., Building — B, Unit 104 • Vineland, NJ 08360 856.691.7600 • www.cclcvineland.com
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