February 2011 - South Jersey MOM Magazine

February

2011

Learn your

A,B,C’s– how to

CHOOSE the right

PRESCHOOL PROGRAM

Is your

THYROID

NO DRILLING REQUIRED important DENTAL QUESTIONS answered

the cause of your

WEIGHT GAIN? RECONNECT with your spouse on DATE NIGHT

Where the pieces of the PUZZLE come TOGETHER ...

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Table of Contents pg. 16 Show No Signs Of Prejudice

mom 2 mom 8 Learn Your A,B,C’s—How to Choose the Right Preschool Program 10 Be the Sports Parent Your Kid Can Be Proud Of

moms R women 2 11 Reconnect with Your Spouse on Date Night 12 What is the Relationship Between Thyroid and Weight Gain?

know 2 grow

Dear Readers, ince my children were born, I always knew the day would come when they would ask me about their skin color. I have thought a lot about how I would respond to this question since I am Caucasian and my husband is biracial: half African-American and half Caucasian. Children aren’t born biased against certain races or even noticing skin color. This is something that is learned over time.

My very best friend said her daughter was about 5 years old when she asked, “Mommy, why am I brown and you are pink?“ I wondered when our children would notice that daddy’s skin was darker than mine. Or if Kayden noticed that his skin color was different than mine and his dad’s.

My husband and I make every effort not to ever describe someone by their skin color.

We might describe them as tall, or having long hair or wearing a red shirt, but we never say, “the black guy or white lady,” in front of them.

Anyway, I knew the day would come when my children started noticing different skin colors. As early as a few short months ago, we were at Friendly’s and our regular waiter there is African-American. Kayden asked me his name one day, and I said, “Who are you talking about?” And he said, “You know, our server at Friendly’s with short hair.” I was so surprised that that was how he described our waiter. (Rather than using his skin color to describe him... as so many adults do).

S

13 Parents’ Guide to Braces 14 No Drilling Required: Important Dental Questions Answered 15 Seven Creative Ways to Tell Kids You Love Them

also in this issue 3 5 6 21 22

editor’s note nana’s 2 sense life sentences things 2 do resource guide

Every month, South Jersey MOM will feature a local child on the cover!

If you think you have the cutest kid in town, send a 4x6 photo and a $15 entry fee (per household) to P.O. Box 2413, Vineland, NJ 083622413. Please make checks payable to Superior Graphics.

If your child(ren) is/are selected, we will arrange a FREE professional photo shoot and they could be on our next cover for all your friends and family to see! Sorry, photos cannot be returned.

www.southjerseymom.com

Since that was so recent, I was really shocked tonight when we were walking through a store and Kayden asks, “Mom, what color am I?” I thought I knew what he was implying, but I didn’t want to assume. So I ask, “What do you mean?” And he says, “What color is this?” And he points to his cheek.

Again, I say, “What do you mean?”

And he says, “My body. What color is my body?” There was no denying it now. It was clear what he was asking. I had no idea what to say. So I ask, “What color do you think you are?” He says, “Ummm, light brown.”

I thought this was so precious and insightful from a 4 year old. “You’re right!” I say. “Everyone has a different color of skin.

Some are lighter and some are darker.” Then he says, “Like sissy and daddy.” Wow! I was even more shocked. He obviously noticed that his sister and father are darker than me and him. When did he start noticing that?

I didn’t want to make a big deal out of this. Race has never been an issue in our family. In our family, love has no color. So I just left it at that. I’m sure he will have more questions as he gets older, but for now, I want him to focus on liking and loving people for who they are, not what they look like.✲ Your Friend and Fellow MOM,

Is your child the CUTEST KID IN TOWN?

features 18 Local Moms Earn Extra Income with Home-Based Business

letter from the editor

February 2011

Parent Name: ____________________________________ Address: ________________________________________ City______________________ State_____ Zip__________ Phone: __________________________________________ Child’s Name & DOB: ______________________________ ________________________________________________ Email: __________________________________________ February 2011 | 3

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February

MOM 2011

CEO/Publisher: Christopher Ognibene • (609) 670-1794 chris@superiorgx.com Executive Editor Adrienne Richardson • (856) 305-3490 adrienne@southjerseymom.com Director of Sales and Marketing Bill Wilson • (609) 280-1741 bill@superiorgx.com For General Advertising Inquiries: bill@superiorgx.com (609) 280-1741 chris@superiorgx.com (609) 670-1794 Production Manager Lisa Celfo lisa@southjerseymom.com Contributing Writers Jeanette Giza, Kate Hogan, Julie Landry Laviolette, Fran LoBiondo, Heidi Smith Luedtke, Jamie Roes, Jan Udlock Submit Calendar Listing: calendar@southjerseymom.com www.southjerseymom.com Created by Markations Adam Nichols • (215) 825-7499 Superior Graphics Print Management LLC publishes South Jersey MOM monthly and distributes it throughout the region.

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It takes a lot of love t breaks my heart when the little ones are sick. So sick that even they know they need that nap; when they need extra hugs and when they need to be held and kept warm and cuddled, a lot.

I was so happy to see Kayden back to his perky, bubbly, energetic self after days of sleeping most of the time. He was sick with some sort of stomach ailment. As Kayden and Camille leave today, I give them my usual big hug, kiss and “I love you so much.” But today I give Kayden an extra squeeze and add, “I’m so happy you are feeling better and not sick anymore.” In his infinite 4-year-old wisdom he replies, “It takes a lot of love to get better when you are sick.” My heart swells. He gets it! He understands love. Children are so smart. I pray this little one keeps that feeling of love in his heart all his life. I am so proud of his parents. It’s easy to see when parents show their children lots of love.

How I wish those three words were said to me when I was a child. I do not ever remember my parents telling me they loved me; sad, but true. I do not remember them saying those words to each other either. I keep telling myself things were different then.

Parents were different. Raising children was a chore. We did not do “family things.” I saw other families having fun together and

I

nana’s 2 sense

South Jersey

wondered why my family did not. I was embarrassed to be seen with my parents because most of the time they argued, yes, even in public.

I think they simply did not like each other anymore. I wonder if they ever really did.

My little sister recently reminded me how wonderful it would have been if we had appreciated our children when they were little as much as we appreciated our grandchildren now. Is it because we do not have to concern ourselves with disciplining our grandchildren like we did our children? Is that why?

What if we really listened to our children the moment they “get it?” They do tell us, like my sweet grandson did. Why don’t we listen?

How can such epiphany come from such a tiny little person, seemingly so naive?

If parents would just say those three words more often and hug and be close to each other and their children, how much better would the world be today? So, no matter what, show them you love them. Tell them you love them, every day. ✲

—Nana

Jean

Nana Jean is a South Jersey grandmother with two daughters and six grandchildren. Enjoy her stories about her 39+ years as a mom and 20 years as a grandmother as she shares her experiences and lessons learned with lots of laughs and tears along the way.

All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part is not permitted without the authorization of the publisher.

Superior Graphics Print Management, LLC Publisher of South Jersey MOM P.O. BOX 268 Wenonah, NJ 08090 Main: (609) 670-1794 Fax: (856) 210-1524

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On the COVER Cutest Kid In Town Winner: Alexandra is an energetic 7-year-old from Williamstown. She enjoys playing soccer, video games, board games, drawing, painting, playing with friends and her dogs “Thor” and “Coco.” She also loves making people laugh and laughing herself. Photo by Shirley Magilton Photography.

www.southjerseymom.com

] February 2011 | 5

life sentences

Going Simple in a Tiny House

O

n day two of the big nor’easter, it’s colder than Nanook’s knickers and the drifts are thigh high. A howling wind speeds down our street fast enough to carry away a small child — I know, because I saw one mom try it. That little imp was the perfect weight to achieve liftoff.

Oh, don’t get offended. You know you’ve thought about it.

I hate cold weather, but I’m tempted to go outside just to exchange the stale air in my lungs. I know I can withstand the hostile climate; I have self-medicated for stress with a stream of butter cookies, so I am all about layers. My fear was that I might get stuck in a snow drift, and my kids might leave me there. I’ve been a little cranky during our forced paralysis.

During my unfortunate incarceration, I sat in my kitchen and read an article in The Wall Street Journal titled, “Move Over, McMansions: Living Simply in Small Houses.”

Yes, I read the Journal. After I do the crossword puzzle. Don’t laugh; those puzzles have expanded my knowledge of the world. For

6 | February 2011

instance, do you know the eight-letter answer to “One protected by Offica Pupp?” I do. “Krazy Kat.” (Youngsters: that’s an old comic strip.)

You see? Edifying.

Anyway, back to the article. It’s a growing trend in house design. For a fraction of the cost of a traditionally-built house, you can purchase these bite-size dwellings and I believe you can wheel them off the lot. They are that small.

According to the article, the average American home has 2,400 square feet of space.

Architects are now building micro homes that span from a few hundred to a little more than a thousand square feet, and contain most of the amenities of larger dwellings, including kitchens and bathrooms.

“Micro homes often rely on artful spaceenhancing designs. Still, the houses can only hold so much,” I read.

Exactly, I mused, looking around at my kitchen counters strewn with gifts unwrapped but not put away. Simple. Unencumbered. Can’t hold a lot of clutter. And surely only one toilet to clean.

But I have been there before. After our second child was born, it was the winter of ’96,

and I was housebound by a succession of ice storms which made it

By Fran LoBiondo irresponsible to go driving on treacherous roads with the boys. It was chaotic condo claustrophobia. The kids were hyper, their toys covered every floor. If I close my eyes, I can find myself right back in that kitchen, peering through curtains of killer icicles with the tic tic ticking of sleet against the panes. That winter went on forever, and I was moving ever closer to the edge of Xannie-Land.

By the summer, at my insistence, we moved to a house with two stories, a big yard — and three toilets.

Fast-forward 15 years, and here I am, once again snowed in, now dreaming of a one-person cell on wheels with no room for a dirty laundry pile. Perhaps I will park it on the grounds of a monastery.

In Tahiti.✲ Fran LoBiondo of Vineland has children in grade school, high school and college. A Purdue University graduate with a degree in Journalism, she has written about parenting, food and fun for 25 yrs.

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The Center for Autism Research at The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia is looking for participants for a research study focusing on early brain development.

www.southjerseymom.com

Who are we looking for?

• Infant siblings of typically developing children • Infant siblings of children with autism

February 2011 | 7

mom 2 mom

LEARN YOUR A, B, C’s —

By Kate Hogan

How to CHOOSE the Right PRESCHOOL Program

I

t’s hard to believe, but it’s time to start thinking about school for your precious, little one! It probably seems as if they just got out of diapers, but many preschool programs start around the age of three, some even younger. Although the curriculum may seem simple child’s play, some thought and planning is best.

Children are expected (somewhat unofficially) to know the alphabet and numbers before they enter elementary school. So for many, the role of preschool has taken the place of the kindergarten of yester year. Nursery school is very much about socialization, having fun and being happy. However, many schools have figured out how to teach academics without the kids even realizing it!

Some points to consider are class size, location, curriculum, teacher accreditations, even snack distribution. But after all is said and done, you should trust your gut instinct. Amy Baran of Cherry Hill and a mother of four feels “it’s often over thought and overdone. I have two criteria for preschool — safe and happy.” You want their first associations with school to be positive. There is plenty of time for your child to dread school!

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Unfortunately in this day and age, children’s safety is a big concern.

You are going to want to make sure that the school you choose has procedures and competent personnel in place. Any good school will share their safety procedures with you. If they won’t, take your check and run the other way.

“Preschool should be a warm and welcoming first bridge between home and school,“ says Diane Balfour, Director of The Schoolhouse Nursery School and Kindergarten in Cherry Hill and Mt. Laurel for the 2010-11 school year. “When you visit a school, you should be able to go into the classrooms, meet the teachers and get a good sense of the environment.” After all, your child may be there for several years and it might end up being your home away from home.

Nursery school should be a place where your child is set up for success at every turn. Not that they won’t have some difficulties along the way, but that is life AND socialization – learning appropriate ways to react to situations, both positive and negative. Although a temper tantrum at the age of 3 is perfectly normal, it’s really wrong at age 25. So preschool starts kids on the right path to acting like civilized human beings!

To help narrow down your search, consider the following: Location: How long does it take to get to the school? Is there a lot of traffic along the way? Remember, we are talking about very young children and the flu can come on quickly. You won’t want to be too far away when you get that phone call to come and pick up your child!

Philosophy: Is the school religious based? Is their emphasis on academics, socialization or strictly free play time? Almost any philosophy is fine, as long as it aligns with your parenting philosophy.

Credentials: Is the school licensed and accredited? Go to www.state.nj.us/dcf/divisions/licensing for a list of all licensed child care centers in New Jersey. Are the teachers certified? Will your child have the same caregiver every day? What is the teacher/student ratio?

Hours: Are you looking for your child to have a few hours of fun and learning or do you need full time daycare while at work? There is a difference between day care centers and preschools. Be sure the facility you choose is able to meet your needs. Your child’s preschool years are precious and few – don’t forget to savor them!✲

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February 2011 | 9

Be the Sports Parent Your Kid Can be Proud Of laying team sports is an important milestone in many kids’ lives. Team sports teach discipline, appropriate behavior in winning and losing, importance of physical exercise, self-confidence and more. Parents play an important role in this learning curve, because kids take cues from their parents on what’s appropriate behavior and what’s not.

All parents want their kid to do well and even to shine on the court. In the process of support and excitement, are you encouraging your child or are you being a pain on the field? Here are some guidelines to help you be the best sports parent you can.

P

Have a Conversation Talk with your kids about different team sports. What are they interested in? Discuss with your kids about playing sports and about the major benefit of team sports; that is, making friends.

Talk with your spouse and make sure it’s not your agenda for your child to play the sport you once played. Then sign him up and write the check.

“One of the primary reasons youngsters participate in sports is to have a sense of accomplishment and self-esteem. This is difficult to do when a parent is trying to vicariously live through his child’s performance,” says Joe Cummings, CEO and Executive Director of National Soccer Coaches Association of America.

Be Helpful Involvement with your child’s team speaks volumes of support to your child. Whether you bring snacks, take team pictures, coordinate parties afterward or your business sponsors the team, get involved. If the coach wants parent participation in the team’s practice, get on the field and help out.

Families’ calendars get crazy full when there is more than one child in the family playing on a sports team. However, make arrangements to attend as many games as possible. If only one parent at a time can attend the game, switch up parents so both parents attend everyone’s game. If you have nearby family members, invite them to a few games. If you do not have any immediate family members living close by, invite a neighbor or family friend to watch a game.

Coaches and other team players count on each other to be on time for both practices and games. “Ensuring that the players are properly equipped and that they are punctual for practices and for games are great ways parents can support their kids,” says Cummings.

It’s easy to believe sports equipment ads that say the right equipment will help your child become a better athlete. Do not buy into the hype.

Children do not need undue pressure put on them by having a parent buy the best or most expensive equipment. Your kid will shine even if he or she doesn’t have a pair of $120 sports shoes.

By Jan Udlock

At the Game There are different roles and responsibilities at a game. A parent’s job is to provide emotional support for the child and leave the coaching to the coach.

“Respect the coach’s expertise and, if they are volunteer coaches with little coaching experience, respect the time and effort they are devoting,” says Dr. Jim Taylor, sport psychologist and author of Positive Pushing: How to Raise a Successful and Happy Child.

Cheer for all the kids on the team regardless of how they do. Before the game, ask your child if he would prefer you to cheer for him loudly or softly. Some kids would prefer their parents to not cheer for them because it causes undue pressure on them. On the other hand, if you have a child that wants the loud banter, have a nickname for your kid.

He will hear the pet name among the screaming fans.

Let Your Kids Fail Watching your child strike out or repeatedly miss a basket is painful for a parent, yet allowing kids to fail is a part of the maturing process. Children are learning skills as well as character both when they achieve and when they are disappointed.

A Poor Call After a game, if your kid brings up the topic of a bad call from the referee, talk with him or her about it. However, do not let your child have a victim mentality that says their team lost because of the ref’s poor calls.

“Referees are human and are bound to make a legitimate mistake or two during any game.

However, there also is the matter of a “perceived mistake,” where the difference in viewing the angle can make all the difference,” says Cummings. Criticizing the umpire’s inconsistent calls does not help anyone in the long run.

Inappropriate Behavior Most sports organizations have parent conduct rules. Coaches normally review them with the parents before formal games begin. Referees are entitled to throw a parent out of the game for inappropriate behavior or ban him from the sports park for the rest of the game. If a parent does not stop the behavior, the child’s team will automatically forfeit the game. Dr. Taylor recommends that the coach or another parent not talk down to the offending parent, but focus on the offending behavior and explain how it hurts the child.

If you, as a parent, are getting a little too involved in your child’s sport, slow down a bit by sitting farther down the field away from the action.

“Winning is not the point, because few children will rise very far up the competitive ladder,” says Dr. Taylor.

Team sports can be fun for the entire family and can give a child a rewarding experience.

“The goal of sports is to instill a love of sport, exercise, physical activity, have fun, develop good motor skills and essential life skills,” says Dr. Taylor.

Now, go out and play ball!✲ Jan Udlock is a mom of five and a freelance writer. She had to sit farther down the third baseline to not get too involved in her sons’ games.

10 | February 2011

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moms R women 2

h it w t c e n n o c e R n o e s u o p s r u o y Date Night

By Jamie Roes

I

f you are like most parents, doctor’s appointments, soccer practices, dance classes and piano lessons are what fill up the dates of your monthly calendar; however, when is the last time that a “Date Night with Spouse” occupied a cherished Friday or Saturday night slot?

Sadly, parents’ schedules are more hectic than ever and the old adage, “Something’s gotta give,” is usually said with spouses spending quality time together at stake. While it initially seems to be the easiest choice to eliminate, it’s not the wisest or healthiest decision. Making time for your spouse strengthens your relationship, sets a good example for your children, and gives you something to look forward to on the busy schedule. Here are a few ideas that may help you get started on planning your Date Night: Learn a New Activity Together – Always wanted to learn the Fox Trot or how to make an amazing Coq au Vin? Why not do it together? Many community colleges offer a wide

F E B R U A RY

variety of evening continued education and personal growth classes that allow you to be introduced to something you may have always wanted to do, but never found the time.

Volunteer – If you want to do something good for others while doing something good for your relationship, then consider volunteering for part or all of your Date Night. You may already volunteer regularly, but if not, there are many web sites that offer hundreds of options according to your location, life passions and term of commitment.

Visit the Family Places without the Whole Family – Do you have season passes to the zoo, aquarium, or museum but only use them with the kids? You may be amazed to see the same things in an entirely different way when you visit without the kids. Best of all, since they are already pre-paid passes, there may be some extra money left over to share an ice cream cone.

Get Outside – Fresh air alters your brain’s level of serotonin, which helps improve your

mood. Couple that fact with spending quality time with your spouse and your cheeks may become sore from smiling so much after this date idea! A walk on the beach, a round of miniature golf, horseback riding, or even a run in your neighborhood together are a few simple ways to incorporate good life choices and quality time together.

Weekend Getaways – Sometimes, just a few hours to unwind and reconnect is not enough. South Jersey is such a convenient location that there are many wonderful options to explore, no matter the weather. A Bed and Breakfast at the beach, a ski lodge in the Poconos, or a historic hotel in Center City, Philadelphia are just a few options that are only about an hour drive from your home.

That means less time driving and more time enjoying your destination and each other.

While it does not matter what you do on your date, it does matter that you actually have the dates. So, place it on the calendar, line up the babysitter well in advance, make the reservations or arrangements needed for the date and look forward to having fun together!✲

Giveaways!

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February 2011 | 11

What is the RELATIONSHIP between THYROID

and

I

t has been appreciated for a very long time that there is a complex relationship between thyroid disease and weight gain.

The thyroid hormone regulates metabolism.

Therefore, if your thyroid is not functioning properly, could this be the cause of your weight gain? Read on to find out.

HYPOTHYROIDISM AND THYROID HORMONE

Since a person with hypothyroidism has a decreased basal metabolic rate (BMR), an underactive thyroid is generally associated with some weight gain.The weight gain is often greater in those individuals with more severe hypothyroidism.

The cause of the weight gain in hypothyroid individuals is also complex, and not always related to excess fat accumulation. Most of the extra weight gained in hypothyroid individuals is due to excess accumulation of salt and water.

Massive weight gain is rarely associated with hypothyroidism.

In general, 5-10 pounds of body weight may be attributable to the thyroid, depending on the severity of the hypothyroidism.

Finally, if weight gain is the only symptom of hypothyroidism that is present, it’s less likely that the weight gain is solely due to the thyroid.

that there is no significant weight loss after successful treatment of hypothyroidism. Again, if all of the other symptoms of hypothyroidism, with the exception of weight gain, are resolved with treatment with thyroid hormone, it’s less likely that the weight gain is solely due to the thyroid. Once hypothyroidism has been treated and thyroid hormone levels have returned to the normal range on thyroid hormone, the ability to gain or lose weight is the same as in individuals who do not have thyroid problems.

Can thyroid hormone be used to help me lose weight?

Thyroid hormones have been used as a weight loss tool in the past. Many studies have shown that excess thyroid hormone treatment can

help produce more weight loss than can be achieved by dieting alone.

However, once the excess thyroid hormone is stopped, the excess weight loss is usually regained. Furthermore, there may be significant negative consequences from the use of thyroid hormone to help with weight loss, such as the loss of muscle protein in addition to any loss of body fat. Pushing the thyroid hormone dose to cause thyroid hormone levels to be elevated is unlikely to significantly change weight and may result in other metabolic problems.✲ For more information, contact the American Thyroid Association at www.thyroid.org or contact your primary care physician.

How much weight can I expect to lose once the hypothyroidism is treated?

Since much of the weight gain in hypothyroidism is accumulation in salt and water, when the hypothyroidism is treated one can expect a small (usually less than 10 percent of body weight) weight loss.

Treatment of the abnormal state of hypothyroidism with thyroid hormone should result in a return of body weight to what it was before the hypothyroidism developed. However, since hypothyroidism usually develops over a long period of time, it fairly common to find 12 | February 2011

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know 2 grow

Parents’ Guide to Braces

By Julie Landry Laviolette mouth full of train tracks used to be just another awkward sign of puberty, almost a rite of passage for those entering their teens. But these days, it’s more common to see elementary school kids sporting a grin full of tin, as some orthodontic treatments are beginning at an earlier age.

With a price tag in the thousands, the need for braces is usually a pronouncement every parent dreads, bringing to mind the geeky metal smiles and headgear of years’ past.

But experts say better materials and new treatment strategies are making braces work more effectively these days, while giving the patient more options as to how they look.

Here are the basics every parent needs to know:

A

What’s the difference between a dentist and an orthodontist?

An orthodontist has completed dental school, then an additional two to three years of study on how to move teeth, says Dr. Robert Bray, president of the American Association of Orthodontists.

When should a child be screened?

The American Association of Orthodontists recommends children be screened at age 7, around the time when their permanent upper teeth are coming in. “We are trying to pick up on things that may be way out of line and trying to find things that may affect their growth or smile,” Bray says. “But this doesn’t mean every child will need to be treated that young; It depends upon the patient.”

Braces used to be for teens, why are kids getting braces at an earlier age?

The trend began about 15 to 20 years ago, when it was determined that early intervention could help in some specific cases, Bray says. For example, thumb sucking can create a functional problem that affects permanent teeth or the bone structure of permanent www.southjerseymom.com

teeth. It’s best corrected early. Though some treatments are beginning earlier, the average age of treatment is about 12.

How can a parent know for sure a child needs braces?

If you are seeing a problem in your child’s mouth, such as overcrowding or a severe overbite, see a specialist and listen to what they have to say, Bray advises. Most orthodontists will take photographs and tell you what needs to be improved.

“If you have doubts, or if something doesn’t make sense, you can certainly get a second opinion,” Bray adds.

How have braces improved over the years?

Today, instead of the metal bands that wrap each tooth, orthodontists have a number of tools to choose from. The most commonly used and least expensive are metal brackets that attach directly to the teeth. Wires that run through the brackets are held in place by tiny round rubber bands and apply gentle pressure to move the teeth. Different colored rubber bands and even metal brackets in the shape of hearts, footballs and flowers can allow the child to personalize their look.

There are several more expensive options that may be used, depending on what needs to be corrected. Tooth-colored ceramic brackets lessen the look of braces. Self-ligating braces are metal brackets that do not require rubber bands to hold the wires. Lingual braces fit behind the teeth. Invisalign are clear brackets worn over the teeth.

How do new braces materials affect treatment plans?

“The change is not so much in shortening treatment plans. But new materials have

changed treatments in other ways. For example, self-ligating braces can spare someone with a severely overcrowded mouth the necessity of having teeth pulled.

Mouths respond differently to these braces, which do not require rubber bands to hold the wires to the brackets, and work without stressing the tissue or bone or hurting teeth, Bray says. The downside is they cost 50 to 100 percent more than metal brackets.

How much do braces cost?

Prices range from $3,500 to $6,500.

What can affect the rate of success?

The patient has to do what they are supposed to do – take care of their teeth, follow instructions and avoid food that can break appliances.

How can parents help the process? Parents must be behind the choice 100 percent or they’re wasting their money. If a parent is feeding their kid Starbursts and Blow Pops and wires are popping and breaking off left and right, then treatment is going to take longer.

What is the average length of treatment?

About two years. But if the patient is not compliant, they’re eating the wrong things, appliances are breaking or they’re not taking care of their teeth, it can be longer.

What should a parent ask on a first visit to an orthodontist?

“First listen, and hear the person out, without worrying about the time or cost,” Bray says.

“Then ask, what absolutely needs to be done now and what can be done later?”✲ Julie Landry Laviolette is a mom of two who wore braces herself. Now she’s saving up for her daughter’s turn.

February 2011 | 13

NO DRILLING REQUIRED:

By Adrienne Richardson

Important Dental Questions Answered ccording to the CDC, over 19 percent of children age 2-19 have untreated cavities. Many parents are unsure when to start taking their children to the dentist, and what proper dental hygiene really means.

We spoke to local pediatric dentist, Dr. William Beck of South Jersey Pediatric Dentistry in Vineland and asked him parents’ pressing dental questions.

A

Q: Why does my toddler have bad breath and what can I do about it?

A: The number one cause of bad breath is poor oral hygiene. Bacteria in the mouth causes the odor, so brushing twice a day and flossing is the most effective way of getting rid of bad breath. If you are doing those things, and the bad breath persists, there may be other problems. Tonsilitis, sinus conditions, gastric issue and systemic problems may exist.

Consult your pediatrician if you suspect there is a problem. Also, seasonal allergies can also cause bad breath and this usually is resolved once allergy season is over.

Q: When should I start flossing my child’s teeth?

A: As soon as teeth are touching each other, you should start flossing in between them. If there are large gaps between the teeth, flossing is not necessary. But once they are fitting tightly together, flossing is very important.

Q: When should I start taking my child to the dentist?

A: For first time parents, I recommend parents bring in the child six months after the first tooth has come in. We like to take the time to educate the parents about proper oral hygiene and answer any questions they may have.

Q: Is it harmful for my child to swallow toothpaste with fluoride in it?

A: Yes! Children should use toothpaste without fluoride until they are able to spit the toothpaste out when brushing. It’s ok if they swallow a little bit here and there, but swallowing it every day can cause major tooth problems down the road.

Q: My 11 month old has four teeth. Do I need to brush them?

A: Yes! As soon as your child’s teeth come in, you should start brushing them.

Q: Is it ok for my 4 year old to chew gum?

A: Chewing gum occasionally is ok as long as it’s sugar-free gum. If your child has cavities, they should not chew gum as the chewing action together with the gum can push stuff down into the cavity space and make it worse.

Q: When will my child lose their first tooth?

A: On average, children start losing their teeth around age 6. However, if they got their first tooth prior to 6 months of age, they may lose their first tooth earlier. Children whose teeth

came in late, could lose their first tooth around age 7 or 8. The earliest a child will probably lose a tooth is age 4.

Q: How can I prepare my child for their first visit to the dentist?

A: Don’t make a big deal out of it. Children are smart, and if you make a big deal out of going to the dentist, they will start to wonder why such a fuss is being made and this could make them anxious. Act like visiting the dentist is just a regular every day experience. You could also bring them with you when you visit the dentist so they can see mommy or daddy get their teeth cleaned.

Q: Do you have any other tips for parents?

A: Remember that baby teeth have to be taken care of just like adult teeth. Brushing twice a day and flossing is very important.

Also, parents often think a sippy cup or juice box is better for their child than a bottle.

But what’s more important is what’s IN the container, not what type of container it is. The sugar in the drinks that are in those containers is actually what causes damage to the teeth and gums. If your child is using a sippy cup for comfort, fill it with water instead of juice. The longer the sugar is in touch with the teeth, the more damage will be caused. So brush their teeth often.✲ Dr. Beck’s office is located at 3017 E. Chestnut Ave, Ste D10, Vineland, NJ. For questions or to make your child an appointment, call (856) 205-0099.

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By Heidi Smith Luedtke

Seven Creative Ways to Tell Kids D

You Love Them

itch the heart-shaped box of chocolates and show your little cherubs how much you love them with these creative gifts and activities. You will make Valentine’s Day fun for everyone – and you may even help your daughter forget that she did not get roses from the boy she not-so-secretly likes.

1.

Worth a Fortune. Bake your own fortune cookies with personalized messages inside to remind your kids just how lucky you are to have them. Find recipes online at AllRecipes.com. Got bakers block? Order custom cookies online at E-FortuneCookie.com.

2.

Bursting with Love. Write a Valentine note on small strips of paper and slip each strip into an inflated balloon before tying the knots. Let your child hop and pop and then re-assemble the phrases of your love letter. Make sure to keep balloon bits away from little mouths – they can be a choking hazard.

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3.

Hungry for Love. Make lunchtime all about hearts by cutting kids’ sandwiches into a heart shape using a cookie cutter or knife. Want to go all out? Buy bread tinted pink at your local bakery to make sandwiches extra-Valentiney.

4.

Just Say “Spaaaaa.” Make bath time extra special with bubble bath, heartshaped soaps, and pink and red bath tub paints. To make your own, mix a few drops of food coloring into a dollop of shaving cream in a bowl. Let kids paint the walls of the tub or themselves for some foamy fun. Be careful to check that the paints will not stain fixtures or skin before indulging.

5.

Buy the Book. Give your child a book that says how much you love him or her.

For little readers, try I Love You Through and Through (by Bernadette Shustak, Cartwheel, 2005). Take an older child on a date to the bookstore and enjoy a hot

chocolate together while browsing. Call it a date.

6.

Puzzled by Love. Buy a do-it-yourself puzzle card or create one yourself by mounting a picture and message on cardstock and cutting puzzle pieces your child can reassemble. Decorate a box or envelope to hold the pieces.

7.

Can’t Hide My Love for You. Have a scavenger hunt at home. Hide chocolate kisses with clues attached to direct your child to a final family event – perhaps a love-themed movie night or an indoor dinner picnic, complete with a heartshaped pizza. Spending time together is the best gift of all.✲

Heidi Smith Luedtke fell head-over-heels in love with her son from the moment she saw him. Her blog on parenting as a leadership experience can be found at www.LeadingMama.com

February 2011 | 15

Show No Signs Of

PREJUDICE

By Gail Perry Johnston

February is Black History Month and no matter what your nationality, it’s a time to celebrate the strides our country has made toward its ideal of liberty for all and to remember those who have suffered along the way. n the fun side, it’s a time to remember the wonderful contributions from black individuals and the race at large: everything from gospel music to Cajun food to the 101 inventions listed on Biography.com (www.biography.com/blackhistory).

Let’s pause to examine ourselves and see if there may be any harmful prejudice—to any category of people—lingering in our minds and hearts and revealing itself to our children.

Since prejudice is usually passed down through generations, as parents we can refuse to pass it on and help put a stop to it. Since prejudice limits one’s ability to empathize and understand one another, prejudice will not serve our children well in this world of diverse people.

It’s imperative that you show no signs of it in front of your kids so that their future can remain wide open for them. Who knows where your children will be working, what hobbies and volunteer activities they will choose, or with whom they will fall in love? If they grow up free from prejudice, their opportunities will be far greater and their social interactions far less complicated than otherwise.

O

16 | February 2011

All of this is tricky, however, because you DO want to communicate your values, opinions and beliefs with your children. The challenge is to show respect to all kinds of people, even when you disagree with their viewpoints or life choices, and to keep your comments about people free from unfavorable generalizations. The tone of your voice is also important. Go ahead and tell your children, for example, how horrible smoking is for Uncle Joe, but keep the disgust for Uncle Joe himself out of your voice.

I am grateful that one thing my parents had in common was freedom from prejudice. They both put a high value on respecting an individual, whether a stranger, neighbor, politician, grocery store bagger or cleaning lady.

My father still delights in striking up conversations with people of all sizes, shapes, colors and ages. Sure, being a social kind of guy helps, but being free from prejudice is one reason he’s so social. The fact is, when you are without prejudice, you tend to be aware of

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the basic human traits that you have in common with others, which, in turn, makes you less afraid and uncomfortable around others, which makes you more social!

Have you noticed that I have used a form of the word “free” four times in this article? We are truly talking about freedom here. Cast systems, communism and oppressive governments are rooted in prejudice.

Prejudice starts small, but can spread wickedly, and it’s to be avoided with diligence.

For the purpose of your parenting, I would like to reiterate that you can have firm opinions about certain matters, but still be without prejudice. For example, you can believe in longer prison sentences for sex offenders, but still be a forgiving person. It’s not hypocritical to make a distinction between the need for social justice to prevent a society from falling apart and the importance of compassion in your personal relationships.

At the kid level, prejudice may be experienced through the common “clique.” If your kids find themselves in a clique, let them know how happy you are that they have special friends, but do your best to explain that they must think for themselves and not make decisions based on the mood of the group or the whim of its leader.

In other words, if someone in the group tries to get everyone else in the group to diss an outsider, encourage your child to remove him or herself at that time or to stand up for the victim. Such bravery is easier for some, but all kids can be taught to refrain from the kind of talk and behavior that puts others down, that essentially says, “We are better than you,” and is akin to prejudice.

Teach and model for your children life without prejudice…and let freedom ring.✲ Gail Perry Johnston is the author of The Social Cause Diet: Find a Service That Feeds Your Soul, available on Amazon and www.socialcausediet.com. Johnston also authored The Wish & The Wonder: Words of Wisdom for Expectant Parents and coauthored A Rumor of Angels: Quotations for Living, Dying, & Letting Go. Visit www.gailperryjohnston.com for more info.

www.southjerseymom.com

February 2011 | 17

Local Moms Earn EXTRA INCOME with Home-Based Business I

f you are like most moms, you want to be home with your children to comfort them when they are sick, or be there for their special events. Many stay-at-home moms left careers to be home and care for their children full time. But in this economy, so many families are now struggling to live on just one income; leaving most moms feeling helpless, unable to contribute to their household income. Several South Jersey moms have found a solution to this dilemma and are teaming up and earning serious incomes, on their own time.

Brenda Regalbuto and family. Photo by VioletBrown Photography.

Brenda Regalbuto of Vineland was introduced to a national health and wellness company just over a year ago. Her friend, Adrienne Richardson (Editor and former owner of South Jersey MOM) approached her with a homebased business she had started. It was with a company that not only offered the healthier, non-toxic products that they wanted to use around their children but an opportunity like no other.

“As a homeschooling mother of five, I’m a busy mom. But when work was slow for my husband who’s self-employed, I needed to earn

18 | February 2011

some extra income,” says Brenda. “Putting my children in daycare was not an option for my family. Finding something that I could do whenever my schedule allowed was the key. So when Adrienne approached me with a homebased business that allowed me to set my own schedule, I jumped on board!”

Adrienne also had a very busy schedule.

While raising two small children, she was running South Jersey MOM magazine, working 60 hours a week. “I saw this opportunity as a way to have a second income. You never know what the future holds and I liked the idea of having a ‘back up plan.’ And since I could set my own schedule, this was perfect for my situation. Once I did my research on the company and tried the products, I knew I had to tell other moms about this!” says Adrienne. They decided to team up and help each other. Six months later, they were both earning over $1,000 a month.

As Brenda and Adrienne began working together, the local leaders in the business guided them every step of the way. They helped train them and armed them with the tools needed for success. “If you live in South Jersey, you really have an advantage in this business.

The top executives within the company live right here in the local area and help anyone who wants to become successful,” says Adrienne.

This health and wellness company makes more than 400 all-natural products that are safe for your family and the environment.

Families who have children with special needs can especially benefit from these products as it allows them to remove the toxins in the homes.This is very important for children with autism, ADD and those with allergies.

The company also makes gluten-free food and vitamins as well as healthy snacks and dietary supplements. “All of the products are safe for you, your children, and they even have

Adrienne Richardson and family. Photo by Lisa Ward Photography.

natural dog snacks, vitamins and shampoo,” Adrienne says. “My family and friends all love the environmentally-friendly products.”

All of the products are made in the USA and cost less than grocery store prices, as they are concentrated and last longer. The company ships the products right to your front door. “I don’t have to take orders or deliver products.

Customers place the orders themselves online or over the phone and the company ships their order directly to their house,” says Brenda. “I don’t even have to collect their payment. I just enroll the customer and the company handles everything after that!”

Many other home-based businesses require you to collect money, deliver orders and to keep on holding parties. “The best part about this business is that you are helping people get healthy all while saving money. I feel good about supporting an American company and helping other moms contribute financially to their family,” says Adrienne.

If you would like to learn more about how you can earn supplemental or career level income, call Adrienne today at (856) 3053490. (There is a one-time enrollment fee of $29 and you can cancel at any time, without hassle.)✲

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For a complete list of events, log onto www.southjerseymom.com

To submit your event, send an email to calendar@southjerseymom.com.

Entries are due six weeks prior to the event and are filled on a first come first serve basis. Space is limited.

and over. Garden State Discovery Museum, 2040 Springdale Rd, Cherry Hill. (856) 424-1233, www.discoverymuseum.com.

Love is in the Air February 11 & 12 at 7 to 9:30 p.m.

George Perez singing classic standards and oldies by Sinatra, Dino, Darin, Nat King Cole, Bennett, Elvis and others. Original Art Exhibit, trivia contest, food and wine available.

Crepe Maker Cafe @ The Back Room Lounge, 607 East Landis Ave, Vineland. Tickets $15/person.

(856) 205-0027.

CUMBERLAND COUNTY

GLOUCESTER COUNTY

Godspell Junior February 4, 5, 6 A groundbreaking and unique reflection on the life of Jesus, with a message of kindness, tolerance and love. In this production, Jesus arrives to help mold the other actors on stage into adults through lessons played out with games and music. 7:30 p.m. and 3 p.m. Sunday Matinee. $13/person. Landis Theatre, 830 E Landis Ave, Vineland. www.landistheatre.com or (856) 691-1121.

Charlotte’s Web February 18 & 19 Live Children’s Theatre. Broadway Theatre of Pitman. $9/person. Visit www.thebroadwaytheatre.org or call (856) 384-8381 for times and tickets.

ATLANTIC COUNTY Sleepover at the Library February 3 at 7 p.m.

Wear your pajamas. Bring a stuffed animal and tuck him in for a sleepover at the library. Please pick up your animals by Noon, Friday February 4 and ask them about their night at the library! Suggested for ages 3 1/2 to 5. Registration required. Atlantic County Library System / Hammonton Branch.

(609) 561-2264.

BURLINGTON COUNTY Parenting Classes Throughout February The following parenting classes will be offered at Ashland Church in Voorhees. Classes are offered at 9:30am and 5pm. 2/6: Every Child is Different: Parenting Your Unique Child; 2/13: Anxiety in Children; 2/20: Effective Discipline; 2/27: Building Good Character in Kids.

Childcare provided. Call Janine at (856) 429-8844 or visit www.ashlandchurch.org for info.

CAMDEN COUNTY Valentines Around the World February 12 &13 from 12 to 3 p.m.

The language of love is universal!

Make a Valentine for a loved one and some special treats for yourself, all with a multicultural twist. $10.95 for adults and children 12 months

Have

Valentine’s Day Family Night February 8 from 6 to 7 p.m.

Bring the family to the library to enjoy Valentine’s Day-themed storytelling and crafts. Age 12 and under. Registration required.

Vineland Public Library, Landis Ave. (856) 794-4244, www.vinelandlibrary.org.

"When the Child Cries" February 4 & 5 Special performance in recognition of Black History Month. When the Child Cries is an electrifying and spiritual account of a woman and her child and their struggle to survive in a city that is too large and too cruel for a naive young woman.

This nationally recognized production is a statement of social struggle and the determination to keep pushing forward, to not lose sight of one's dreams, and to become a positive force in society. $25/person.

Rowan University, Pfleeger Concert

things 2 do

February Calendar

Hall, Glassboro. Call for show times and tickets.

(856) 256-4448.

SALEM COUNTY The Path to Freedom: Black Families of New Jersey February 5 from 3 to 4:30 p.m.

Walter Greason from Ursinus University will discuss and sign his recently released book Path to Freedom: Black Families of New Jersey. Liberty and equality required the sacrifices of many African Americans who lived and made a difference in New Jersey, including the Russell, Ham, and Brown families who appear in this book. This contemporary narrative of community uplift offers a fresh appreciation of just how long the path to freedom is. Friends Village, 1 Friends Dr, Woodstown. Call Jim Schulte at (856) 769-2708 for more info.

Click, Clack, Moo February 12 at 2 p.m.

Farmer Brown’s cows find out how to use his granddaughter’s laptop and soon are protesting their work conditions. $8 and $10/person.

Appel Farm Arts & Music Center, 457 Shirley Rd, Elmer. (856) 358-2472.

South Jersey MOM delivered to your home!

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4 Home delivery of South Jersey MOM, 12 monthly issues ❑ 4 Our monthly e-newsletter in your inbox ❑ To purchase your subscription via mail, cut out the form and mail with payment to: Superior Graphics P.O. Box 2413, Vineland, NJ 08362 or purchase online at www.southjerseymom.com

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February 2011 | 21

resource guide

FOR THE HOME DO YOU NEED AN ELECTRICIAN OR HANDYMAN IN YOUR HOME? Experienced electrician can install new lights, ceiling fans, light dimmers, receptacles and do service upgrades and additions, as well as any other electrical needs. Also offering general handyman help with fixing just about anything around your house that needs fixing! Call Eric at (856) 305-9809.

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CAN'T GET THE TOYS, LAUNDRY AND OTHER KID STUFF UNDER CONTROL? If you're feeling overwhelmed by all the “stuff� consuming your house, let BB’s Clutter Solutions reduce your stress, create order and help you find a place for everything...for good. Contact Barbara Berman at (856) 912-0077 or www.bb-clutter-solutions.com and get your house back today!

GIFT IDEAS GREAT PERSONALIZED GIFTS FOR ALL AGES At JUST FOR LITTLE PEOPLE (and others, too!) we specialize in new baby gifts both hand-painted or embroidered. Beautifully wrapped and available for pick-up at our new Gibbsboro location, or we can ship it for you. Call (856) 627-8901 or check out www.justforlittlepeople.com.

HEALTH & WELLNESS

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PARTIES ABRAKADOODLE ARTY PARTIES! Celebrate CREATIVITY! CUSTOMIZED Arty Parties perfect for BIRTHDAYS, SCHOOL OR SCOUT EVENTS. Children's artwork is FRAMED - the ultimate UNIQUE PARTY experience! Hosted at your location; we provide an ARTrageous teacher, materials & colorful FUN for ages 2-12. Visit www.abrakadoodle.com/ nj01 or call (856) 914-0521.

PEDIATRIC OCCUPATIONAL THERAPY NEED HELP GUIDING YOUR CHILD’S DEVELOPMENTAL JOURNEY? At The Schlinic, happy childhoods are our specialty. Kids come for awesome motor equipment, fun sensory experiences and developmental play. Parents come for answers, professionals who listen, assessments and research-supported intervention.

Learn more at www.schlinic.com or call Dr. Jodi at (856) 692-9292.

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www.totalfamilysolutions.com

856.772.5809

or email chris@superiorgx.com www.southjerseymom.com

February 2011 | 23

NJ’s Largest Indoor Water Park!

Huge, Modern Arcade! Full-Service Café!

From Rainy Day Activities to Group Events, we have something for you! © \w e } © iS {y w d{{z pecial Needs © X ~zw fw { Exclusive Events © iy j © fP{ |{y | Yw erfect for Camps © i j{w fw { & Schools Visit SaharaSams.com for upcoming events!

Have your birthday party with us!

Great value and unbeatable fun!

$30 OFF $40 OFF

Saturday and Sunday Party

Friday Party

Coupon required for discount. Please mention discount at time of booking and present coupon on day of party. Coupon not valid on Wacky Wednesday parties. Cannot be combined with any other offers. Coupon expires on April 30, 2011. Visit SaharaSams.com for additional details and birthday FAQs. SJMOMS

Buy your tickets online and save!

$11 OFF $9 OFF on Weekdays on Weekends Use Promo Code SJM1895

Use Promo Code SJM2095

Offer available for online purchases only. This offer is valid for up to 9 guests. Not valid for Group Admission or Birthday Parties. Cannot be combined with other offers. Discounts are only to be applied to full-price, general admission ticket of $29.95. Offer expires on April 1, 2011.

535 N. ROUTE 73 IN WEST BERLIN, NJ 08091 856-767-7580 U WWW.SAHARASAMS.COM