October 2011 - South Jersey MOM Magazine

Page 1

October

2011

become a

HIGH ENERGY mom

new technology can help detect

BREAST CANCER EARLIER

FUN fall and winter

PARTY IDEAS



Table of Contents

Dear Readers,

letter from the editor

October 2011

pg. 16 Breast Cancer Awareness

Kayden, Daddy and Camille on our first crabbing trip

mom 2 mom 8 Become a High Energy Mom 9 Plan Ahead to Make Halloween Spooktacular Instead of Stressful 10 Asthma and the Flu: Will it Affect You?

moms R women 2 12 Life After Losing a Baby 14 Break the Cycle of Domestic Violence: Fight for Awareness

know 2 grow 18 A Life Full of Possibilities with Down Syndrome 20 Fun Fall and Winter Birthday Party Ideas 23 What’s Up With That Sassy Attitude?

also in this issue 3 5 6 25 26 29 30

editor’s note nana’s 2 sense life sentences just born business spotlight: the tutoring club things 2 do resource guide

ach month when I plan what topics we will feature, I often select subjects that coincide with whatever “awareness” month it is. When planning the October issue, I noticed there were several disabilities or illnesses that needed recognition. Topics like Down Syndrome, Domestic Violence, Infant Loss and Breast Cancer. I felt like they were all important and needed to be discussed. But I also didn’t want to put out a magazine full of heavy topics and talk of doom and gloom. So we didn’t. Instead, we are sharing stories of a mom who once faced uncertainty about the future for her child with a disability, who now has an inspirational story of triumph and overcoming. We are educating women on new technology to help increase early detection of breast cancer and we are offering advice for gaining control of your life and getting out of an abusive relationship. No, this issue isn’t full of doomsday stories…it’s full of hope. We have all had our share of trials and tribulations. We’ve had those moments when we feel like there is no way something good could ever come from the horrible news we just got. Spouses lose jobs, children get illnesses, houses flood…we are not in control of

E

these things. But we are in control of our reactions to these things. We can choose to be crushed by events that aren’t part of our “plan” or we can choose to have hope. Hope is having a desire to look forward with confidence, and trust that everything will work out for the best. Not necessarily what we might think would be “best.” Sometimes, we don’t see the “best” until long after the trial and suffering is over. Then one day, you look back and say, “Wow. If that hadn’t happened, I wouldn’t be where I am now.” It’s often not clear to us why “bad” things happen in our life, but we must trust that something “good” will come of it. I know I have learned the most when I’ve suffered the most. If you are in the middle of a trial right now…don’t give up HOPE. Temporary pain brings long term gain. ✲ Your Friend and Fellow MOM,

“ Like” South Jersey MOM magazine on Facebook and find out about local events, win prizes and connect with other moms in the area! www.facebook.com/SouthJerseyMOM

www.southjerseymom.com

October 2011 | 3


4 | October 2011

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


October

MOM 2011

CEO/Publisher: Christopher Ognibene • (609) 670-1794 chris@superiorgx.com Executive Editor Adrienne Richardson • (856) 305-3490 adrienne@southjerseymom.com Marketing & Business Development Specialist Randi Bresalier • (856) 986-9606 randi@superiorgx.com For General Advertising Inquiries: randi@superiorgx.com (856) 986-9606 chris@superiorgx.com (609) 670-1794 Production Manager Lisa Celfo lisa@southjerseymom.com Photographer Christina DeColli JCP Portraits—Deptford Mall (856) 845-2891 Contributing Writers Makema Douglas, Jeanette Giza, Jennifer Gregory, Tiffany Guerzon, Kate Hogan, Carolyn Leigh Kellerman, Victoria M. Lees, Fran LoBiondo, Mary Oves, Jeanne Stark Submit Calendar Listing: calendar@southjerseymom.com www.southjerseymom.com Created by Markations Adam Nichols • (215) 825-7499 Superior Graphics Print Management LLC publishes South Jersey MOM monthly and distributes it throughout the region. The publication is available free of charge at select locations. Subscriptions $29.99 per year. TM

All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part is not permitted without the authorization of the publisher. Superior Graphics Print Management, LLC Publisher of South Jersey MOM P.O. BOX 268 Wenonah, NJ 08090 Main: (609) 670-1794 Fax: (856) 210-1524

www.southjerseymom.com

nana’s 2 sense

South Jersey

Shut That Kid Up! very time I am out and about I gather more fodder for my column. It’s so easy. I look and listen and simply witness life. Good and bad parents are all around us.What disturbs me most is the embarrassing remnants of not so good parents that affect future parents: our children. It’s 4 p.m. on a Saturday in Wal-mart and a sweet looking elderly couple stroll down the aisle sharing a shopping cart. Nearby, a baby screams that ear piercing scream one step below serious injury; the “I’m going to scream until I get what I want,” tantrum. Grandpa blurts out so all can hear, “shut that kid up.” I wonder how this couple disciplined their children. I wonder if this grandpa spanked his child in public or took the belt to him in private. I wonder if his child grew up to treat his own children the same way; hopefully, the opposite. Hopefully, that child grew up and decided there is a better way to quiet his children. While it may not be our idea of a “justified” reason, kids cry and throw tantrums for a reason. Usually the reason is their inability to communicate with us. There is a lot of good information out there to help parents, but what if the damage is already done? You can’t take it back. Our actions, positive and negative, can have deep and long lasting effects. I still live with my mistakes. My children live with my mistakes. We cannot clear the slate. Sometimes the forgiveness does not come until well after the children are grown and have their own children; sometimes the forgiveness does not come at all. That, we have to live with.

E

[

On the COVER Cutest Kid In Town Winner: Ava, age 5, spends most of her time with her family in their Medford home. During summer, Ava enjoys going to Ocean City and riding the waves on her boogie board. Ava is a true girl at heart and loves playing with her stuffed animals and baby dolls. She also enjoys curling up with her parents to read them a book! Photo by Christina DeColli of JCP Portraits, Deptford Mall; www.jcpportraits.com. Shot on location at Duffields Farm, www.duffieldsfarm.com

I always say I am such a better grandma than I was a mom. I made lots of mistakes. The problem is, if you wait until your mind is mature enough to raise children, your body will be too old to have children. Mistakes are inevitable. Children are little people with the same feelings as adults. They should be treated with respect just as we expect them to respect us. What memories will your children have of growing up? Memories of love and the feeling of excitement knowing daddy is home with lots of hugs or memories of dread and fear with lots of yelling and punishment? My goal through the years has always been to entertain you, make you laugh and share the reality of being a parent. I tell you what bugs me and sometimes I offer advice. Sometimes we have to talk about the bad stuff. Sometimes it helps. My advice for dealing with the screaming children; think of the consequences and hesitate a bit before you react, before you open your mouth and show our next generation of parents the wrong way to react. Your unexpected moment of silence might just confuse them enough to quiet them down. My suggestion to those who don’t want to hear the children, shop after 10 p.m. when the little screamers are in bed. Wal-mart is open 24 hours. That’s my 2 cents worth.✲

—Nana

Jean

Nana Jean is a South Jersey grandmother with two daughters and six grandchildren. Enjoy her stories about her 39+ years as a mom and 21 years as a grandmother as she shares her experiences and lessons learned with lots of laughs and tears along the way.

] October 2011 | 5


life sentences

Taking the Larger Half of the 50-50

W

hen we were planning our getaway, my daughter asked, “what would be something you would want to do?� I said, “I would like a place to hike in the woods and maybe see a waterfall.� She said, “I’m thinking water park, shoppes and perhaps a spa treatment.� Seriously, I do wonder where she came from. Unless you count skin biopsies and brain radiation, her mother is not really a treatment kind of girl. I asked my sister along and my daughter brought her friend. It had to be even. If I couldn’t bring an adult and she brought a girlfriend, then it would morph into a Mom-Following-Tweens-Around-A-Mall vacation, which is, trust me, no day at the beach. It was to be a 50-50 trip. Half of the time we would do girl things and the other half mom things. Except, having spent a day and a half in the chlorinated steam of the ginormous indoor water park, riding all of the rides and rating them for their “intensity,� the girls were now ready to get up early and go on the most intense ones before they got too crowded. “We’re going to a diner for breakfast and then a hike at Bushkill Falls,� I announced on the third morning. “What?� snapped Her Ladyship, starting with the elaborate eyeroll and ending with the cross-armed pout. “I thought this was supposed to be equal!� I would not back down. Aunt Mair and I are diner rats from way back. We no longer go at 2 a.m. after a fun night out, but we still love our breakfast and coffee. There were two genetic traits in play here. From our mother, Mair and I have inherited a passion for coffee. We limit ourselves to mornings, but Mom’s a chain drinker. At 87, she can quaff a whole pot and sleep like a baby. We don’t know where the second trait came from, but we all have episodes of low blood sugar. Oh, excuse me. My sister and I have low blood sugar. My daughter is “not a morning person.� I usually just get the over-caffeinated jitters and drink a glass of milk. Mair has nearly blacked out a few times waiting to eat, so she carries emergency snacks in her purse. But don’t sit around negotiating. When she’s feeling peckish, she’s likely to grab your car keys and leave you in the dust.

My daughter, when her body is out of fuel, turns on her mother with the venom of a pit viper. Snarling, baring her fangs, hissing invective and, if not fed immediately, she gets to howling like a she-wolf. She calls this “not a morning person.â€? She pouted all the way to the diner and By Fran LoBiondo would not get out of the car when we got there. We left her in the parking lot, went in, and sat down. As a parent, my goal is to never do anything that makes me look stupid in the police blotter, but we sat where we could see just in case a social worker came by. Eventually she came in and sat glowering until we were almost done. She nibbled some toast and milk. Within minutes, the fangs retracted and my fair maiden reappeared, asking, “So what’s the plan for today?â€? We hiked a beautiful trail from which you could see rushing creeks and waterfalls at every turn. We have lots of pictures of our wood nymphs, posing and smiling as if nature hiking was their idea all along.âœ˛ Fran LoBiondo of Vineland has children in grade school, high school and college. A Purdue University graduate with a degree in Journalism, she has written about parenting, food and fun for 25 yrs.

Playdatess Just Just for Parents Children. P arents & Childr ren. en. presented b byy the Discovery Garden State Disco ver y Museum

2nd Thur Thursday sday y of each month at 11am 1am ˆ Macy’s Macy’s Court Court

Membership is free, Membership free, just register ister playdate at the pla aydate ydate event. event.. Receive Receivve a free gift when you you join. Each month, families will escape cape world to a w orld of play plaayy and discovery disco over y enjoyy a variety together and enjo varietyy of enticing activities,, including puppet shows, arts crafts, sho ws, ar ts & cr afts,, educational onal games and sing-a-longs.Visit games, moorestown-mall.com moor resto own-mall.com

for for details.

6SYXIW 0IRSPE 6SEH ˆ 1 6SYXIW 0IRSPE 6SEH ˆ 1SSVIWXS[R 1SSVIWXS S[ [R 2. ˆ 2. ˆ For a director hours and special events, evvents, ents,, please visit directoryy of stores,, mall hours moor resto own-mall.com m sign up ffor or our enewsletter enewsletter,r,r too! moorestown-mall.com AP Pennsylvania ennsylvania Real Estate state Investment Investment Trust TrrustŽ Proper Property ty

6 | October 2011

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


Love Of Learning ... Begins Here

Follow F ollow Us Us on on Facebook! Fa Facebook!

Early Private P rivate E arly Childhood Education Education For For Childhood eeks T o8Y ears 6W Weeks To Years

C

oome me let let your your child child explore explore the t he w wonder onder of of learning learning, w here they they will will create, create, discover discoveer where aand nd make make new new friends, fr i end s , nurtured n ur tured bbyy teachers teachers degreed d e g re e d iin n early early childhood childhood education education and and curriculum designed designed for for their t h e ir a curriculum age age and and their their iimagination magination.

Enroll E nro oll Today! To T oday!

Scan S c an w with ith yyour our smartphone smar tphone to to visit vi si t

malvernschool.com ma lvernschool.com

Locations L ocations In In P PA A & N NJ J

Call C all 11-877-MALVERN - 87 7- MA LV E R N ffor or N NAEYC A E YC a accredited ccre dite d schools scho ols

www.southjerseymom.com

October 2011 | 7


mom 2 mom

y g r e n E High MOM

Become a

ou hurry all day, tackling your too-long to-do list. By mid-afternoon, you want to collapse on the couch or get a quick fix of caffeine and carbs. Don’t. We have expert advice on how to get – and sustain – the physical and emotional energy you need.

Y EAT

You will be tired and cranky if you are low on fuel, says Rebecca Scritchfield, MA, RD, a health fitness specialist and registered dietician. Decide when to eat by attending to your body’s hunger signals, not based on the clock or your moods, she says. Eating when you are not hungry causes weight gain, and extra weight weighs you down. Manage energy levels by eating a balanced plate of high-quality foods at each meal. Make it simple: Aim for one third fruits and vegetables, one third starchy carbohydrates (like beans, brown rice or pasta) and one third lean protein. Do not cut out fats and sugars, Scritchfield says, they are important. Sugars give you energy and fats keep you fuller, longer. When you combine them, the fats slow the release of sugar into your bloodstream, so you do not get a sugar rush and a subsequent drop in energy. The key is to choose the right sugars and fats, says Scritchfield. Fruit, whole grains and dairy products are smart sugar sources for your diet. Eat omega-3 fats too. Found in salmon and walnuts, omega-3 fats help repair damaged cells and protect against inflammation. Unsaturated fats in olive oil and avocados also protect your heart. Bottom line: If you want energy, focus on nutrition not restriction.

MOVE When you are tired, exercise may feel like drudgery. “It’s counterintuitive,” says Kara Thom, an endurance athlete and co-author of Hot (Sweaty) Mamas: Five Secrets to Life as a Fit Mom. “Exercise helps frazzled moms save their sanity. It’s both calming and energizing.” If you are tired, get moving. You do not have to run a 5K; commit to a 10-minute walk.When you put on your workout clothes and start walking, you will get some quiet time and a change of scenery. Bonus: You will feel good and will likely walk further than you planned. Take the kids along for a ride or a run. “Me time” gets lost when you are a mom, Thom says. If you feel like you have to hire a sitter to 8 | October 2011

get a good workout, you are wrong. “Once I opened myself up to exercising with my kids, being a mom didn’t restrict my workouts,” says Thom, “it gave me new options.” She rides her stationary bike in the driveway while her kids cycle around the cul-de-sac. In the winter, she pulls them on a sled while she snowshoes. The opportunities are endless if you think creatively. Commit to fitness. Soon the kids will not be able to keep up with you.

WORK As moms, we do not just want energy, we want to feel focused. When you jump from task to task, productivity plummets, according to Dave Crenshaw, author of The Myth of Multitasking: How “Doing It All” Gets Nothing Done. What we call multitasking is really switching back and forth between two (or more) tasks that require our attention, notes Crenshaw. The costs of switchtasking are high. Constant stops and starts drain your mental and emotional energy and decrease your efficiency. When you are unproductive, you feel frustrated. To preserve your positive outlook, do one thing at a time. Schedule time for each task and use a timer to stay focused.Turn off your cell phone or close your email to avoid distraction. It’s a myth that women are better at multitasking, Crenshaw says, juggling work and family is especially challenging.When you do not give people your full attention, they notice. Be present, Crenshaw advises. Make sure you meet kids’ needs before moving on to other tasks. Giving minimal attention to people you love leaves everyone – including you – dissatisfied.

By Heidi Smith Luedtke, PhD

rhythm. A drop in body temperature signals it’s time to sleep. Mimic this natural occurrence by taking a warm bath or shower 90 minutes before bed, Kinosian suggests. Bedtime routines are good for grownups, too. Enjoy a cup of herbal tea or warm milk. Snuggle with your partner or read a good book. These rituals help you switch gears before sleep. Even if you are exhausted, you may have difficulty falling or staying asleep. Clock watching reminds you how little time you have left for sleep and how tired you will feel tomorrow, says Kinosian. Turn your clock away to keep from obsessing over the time. If your energy fizzles, be kind to yourself. Even high-energy moms have low-energy moments. Rest and regroup so you are ready for the next life challenge.✲

SLEEP If you want to bounce out of bed in the morning, get 7 to 9 hours of sleep. Keep a consistent bedtime. Do not work or clean house until you crash, says Janet Kinosian, author of The Well-Rested Woman, your body and your brain need time to unwind. Take advantage of your body’s natural circadian Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


Plan Ahead to Make

HALLOWEEN SPOOKTACULAR Instead of Stressful By Jennifer Gregory alloween can be a fun holiday spent watching your children looking adorable as a cowboy or princess. But it can also be a stressful evening spent looking for Dorothy’s left red shoe or dealing with hungry children because you forgot about dinner.With a little bit of planning and organization, you can have time to enjoy your children and make memories as a family.

H

Get Everything Ready Before the Big Night Several weeks before Halloween, sit down with your kids and plan their costumes. Make a list of everything they will need, including shoes, makeup and hair accessories and put everything in one place. If the weather will be chilly, be sure to determine the best way to keep warm, such as a long sleeve shirt or long underwear. Debra Holtzman, Child Safety and Health Expert, recommends using reflective tape to increase visibility to drivers and giving children glow sticks so parents can easily spot them in a pack of kids. “Kids love decorating their costume and bags with the tape and the glow sticks are always fun for them to use.” Find everything you will need to have in hand as you walk out the door on the evening of October 31st. Dig the plastic pumpkins out of the attic for your children to collect candy or purchase new ones if yours are broken or lost. Charge your cell phone and have it ready to take with you for the evening. Find as many flashlights as you will need and put fresh batteries in each one. Buy candy at least several days before and you can even pour it in the bowls if you will be especially pressed for time on Halloween. But be sure to hide the candy from both yourself and the kids so there is some left for trick-or-treaters. Determine a Trick-or-Treat Plan By coming up with a trick-or-treating plan before Halloween, your kids will know what to expect. Decide what approximate time you will go and be sure to keep in mind that the time change is not until November so it will get darker later than some previous Halloweens. Figure out the arrangements for trick-or-treating, such as which parents will be going with the kids. If your older child is going to trickor-treat without an adult, make sure they are traveling with a group of kids. Holtzman recommends children under age 12 be accompanied by an adult when trick or treating. “For guidance and safety sake, accompany younger children to the door of every home they visit,” says Holtzman. Think About Halloween Night Dinner With excitement of the evening, dinner on Halloween is often an afterthought and additional stressor. Come up with a plan ahead of time so you aren’t scrambling around the kitchen as your half-dressed ghosts and Jedi’s complain they are hungry. www.southjerseymom.com

Whatever you decide to do for dinner, keep it simple and have as much prepared before hand as possible. Some parents find that ordering pizza is a fun treat that saves time while other families have a tradition of making lasagna to heat up before heading out. Even sandwiches and some soup can be an easy dinner for the night. Suzy Buglewicz, mom of three, solves the Halloween dinner dilemma by making a big batch of chili in the morning to have ready whenever her crew is hungry. “My thought has always been that I can’t control how the trick-or-treating is going to go, but I can control the fact that I have a healthy meal that can be eaten whenever anyone is hungry, in between the candy bowl raiding,” says Bugelwicz. Address the Candy Issue The best part of Halloween for kids is the candy. While the worst part of Halloween for parents is the candy. Decide in advance what your rule is going to be about eating candy and stick with it. Will your children be allowed to munch on candy while trick-ortreating? Let them know the plan. Holtzman recommends not letting them eat the treats until you inspect the candy for safety and packing healthy snacks for munching along the route. Many parents do not want their children to consume the sheer amounts of candy they receive. At Hotlzman’s house, she has her children pick out their favorite twenty treats for her to pass out to them over a period of time. She then takes the rest of the candy to work for coworkers to munch on. Other families have their children leave most of their candy outside their bedroom door and the Halloween Fairy replaces the candy with a small toy or book. Another idea is to simply ration the candy out and let the kids know that each day they can have two pieces after dinner. By planning out the evening before October 31st, you will be on your way to a memorable and less stressful Halloween. And be sure to take lots of pictures.✲ Jennifer Gregory is a freelance writer who lives with her husband, two kids and three dogs. Her family always orders a pizza before heading out on Halloween Night. Her kids already have their orders in for their toppings of choice.

October 2011 | 9


AsthMA AnD the Flu Will it AFFect You?

t

he influenza virus, a single stranded RNA virus, is typically carried by wild birds, but does not cause disease in these animals. But in humans, influenza, a.k.a the flu, can cause infections characterized by fever, body aches, fatigue, headaches, sore throat, runny nose, nasal congestion and cough. The immune system of healthy individuals can usually eliminate influenza infections. But there are subgroups in the general population at risk of developing complications and even death from influenza. These subgroups include the young, the elderly and those with diabetes, cardiovascular and lung disease. Included in the subgroup with lung disease are those who have asthma. Influenza infections can trigger asthma exacerbations which lead to worsening cough, wheeze, shortness of breath, chest tightness and even respiratory distress. Asthmatics are also at risk for developing secondary bacterial pneumonia. What happens when we become infected with influenza? The virus invades the respiratory tract, destroying normal airway tissue. In response, our immune system fights to eliminate the virus. It does so by releasing multiple pro-inflammatory chemicals and recruiting white blood cells. However, the consequence of this immune response is that it causes inflammation of our respiratory tracts. This inflammation can trigger severe wheezing and

10 | October 2011

shortness of breath in patients with asthma. You can prevent being infected by the influenza virus by receiving the flu vaccine. There are two flu vaccines available: an inactivated vaccine (contains killed virus and is given by injection) and a live vaccine (contains weakened virus and is given by nasal spray). The Centers for Disease Control recommends everyone over 6 months of age receive the influenza vaccine yearly. The influenza season lasts from November through March with the peak season occurring between December and February. As such, the best time to receive the vaccination is between October and November because it takes a few weeks for the body to develop sufficient antibodies against the virus. Which type of flu vaccine should you receive? Most people can receive the live vaccine safely without any complications. But

By Min Ku, MD

those who have asthma should receive the inactivated vaccine because the live vaccine can potentially cause an acute exacerbation of asthma. Additionally, individuals with HIV or other immunodeficiencies and pregnant women should only receive the inactivated instead of the live vaccine. The flu vaccine is very safe. Because of the overall health benefit gained from the vaccination and the established safety of the vaccine, it’s strongly recommended that all individuals over the age of 6 months – especially those with asthma and other chronic medical conditions mentioned above – receive the influenza vaccine yearly. A word about egg allergy and the influenza vaccine: many asthmatics may have allergies, which might include egg allergy. Some fear the influenza vaccine can cause an allergic reaction because the vaccine is prepared in embryonated hen eggs and contains measureable levels of egg protein. But the true incidence of allergic reaction to the influenza vaccine in an egg allergic individual is extremely low. Seek the advice of an allergist to determine if it’s safe for your child if they are allergic to eggs.✲ For more information, contact Allergy & Asthma Care at www.aacallergy.com or call (856) 795-5600.

All Kids First II ...a place to love Private Infant & Toddler Pre-School, In or Out of District

All Kids First is proud to announce our second location for infants, toddlers and preschool ages! Our additional facility is located at 1321 Stewart Street, Vineland (From Magnolia Rd., turn onto Stewart St.)

For registration and inquiries please call

856.405.0711

Tender Loving Care along with early learning

Caring for your Baby & Toddlers 1 month to 4 years

Ask about our private Kindergarten which will also be available!

www.allkidsfirstnj.com Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


[ ] NOW HIRING!

BECOME AN ADVERTISING ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE WITH South Jersey MOM • Flexible hours - 20 hours per week minimum • Work from home - must have home office setup

Interested applicants should send cover letter and resume to chris@superiorgx.com *Experience preferred, but not required. Full training provided.

www.southjerseymom.com

October 2011 | 11


moms R women 2

Life after Losing a Baby By Carolyn Leigh Kellerman

C

ongratulations you are pregnant! The home pregnancy test read positive, you see your OB/GYN doctor and the pregnancy is confirmed on ultrasound. Heart rate is great, baby looks very healthy. You announce your pregnancy. You plan, decorate and do everything a mother does before the baby arrives and then the unthinkable happens. Your doctor tells you the worst possible news, “I am so sorry, but your baby has passed.” Do not question yourself. Do not blame yourself. It’s not your fault.There is no way you could have prevented it.There is no straight definition for infant loss. There are many types of infant loss: miscarriages, still births, SIDS death, medical terminations and other health related conditions. Miscarriage is a leading cause of death among infants as well as premature labor. Jen and Carl Beebe lost their first child at 32 weeks. Jen went in for her regular appointment and was told the baby was measuring small. They couldn’t schedule an ultrasound for about a week. Jen went in for the ultrasound and received the devastating news. The doctor took a look at the screen and said, “I’m sorry but there is no heartbeat.” Jen was immediately taken to the hospital to induce labor and delivered her stillborn child, Oron Carl Beebe III. Oron was buried next to his grandfather, his namesake. “I held him in my arms for a short time – a time I will always cherish. We chose not to do an autopsy. [The hospital] did run a lot of blood tests on him and me, but all tests came back fine – [doctors] were not able to find a reason for his death,” explains Jen. Coping with the loss was a difficult time for the Beebes. They began to isolate themselves from others and family members. “We were angry and jealous of people who had babies, because we did not,” says Jen. The Beebes started attending the HOPING (Helping Other Parents in Normal Grief) support group at Virtua Hospital in Voorhees. The support group was a tremendous help. The Beebes met friends and shared their story with others. Jen’s advice for other families who experience the loss of a baby is to get help. Do not think you can handle it on your own. Talk to your spouse – they are going through the same thing. Do not shut them out. Attend a support

The Beebe family of Mt. Ephraim

group, talk to people, yell and scream – it’s ok. The Beebes think about Oron every day. They will always hold a special place in their hearts for him. HOPING is run by Ann Coyle, a registered nurse at Virtua Hospital in Voorhees. Coyle has worked in the neonatal intensive care unit for 28 years. The grief support group is open to anyone who has lost a child (from conception to one year of life). The group holds a memorial service every December to honor and remember all babies who have died. “There are several online resources for moms, but Virtua’s HOPING grief support group provides face-to-face interaction with someone who knows exactly what you are going through, which is crucial,” says Coyle. There are many misconceptions about support groups. They are not just a bunch of people sitting around crying. Some members at HOPING make lifelong friends and go on to share in the joys of each other’s subsequent children. Remember, you are never alone. It’s important to speak to others or join a support group.You will never forget your precious baby, but speaking to a counselor, someone online or joining a support group will help you through the healing process.✲ HOPING meets at the Barry Brown Health Education Center across from the old Virtua Hospital in Voorhees on Evesham Rd. on the first and third Monday of every month from 7 to 9 p.m. Ann Coyle can be reached via email at tacoyle91@aol.com.

FALL 2011: Canlan Ice Sports all NEW Bounce Mania birthday party packages Customize your party around life's busy schedule. New this Fall! Guests can enjoy the use of our inflatables all day on Sat 11am to 5pm and Sun 1pm to 6pm 12 | October 2011

Call our event coordinator today to find out more! 856.691.2222 or www.icesports.com/vineland

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


Quality Care Resource and Referral Services, Inc. Before and After Care Subsidy Assistance • Parent Referrals Child Care Subsidy Assistance • Strengthening Families Technical Assistance on Early Care Issues • Professional Development for Child Care Providers • Parent Education Family Child Care Registration

Corporate Phone Number 856.462.6800 856.462.6801(fax) www.qcrrinc.org CAPE MAY OFFICE 1065 Rt. 47 South Suite A Rio Grande, NJ 08242 Phone: 609.898.5500 Fax: 609.898.5501 www.southjerseymom.com

CUMBERLAND OFFICE 415 West Landis Ave. Suite 202 Vineland, NJ 08360 Phone: 856.462.6800 Fax: 856.462.6801

GLOUCESTER OFFICE 6 North Broad Street Suite 300 Woodbury, NJ 08096 Phone: 856.628.8600 Fax: 856.628.8601

SALEM OFFICE 5 Route 45 Suite 100 Mannington, NJ 08079 Phone: 856.469.6100 Fax: 856.469.6101 October 2011 | 13


Break the Cycle of Domestic Violence

Fight For AwAreness By Makema Douglas

e

ver suspect someone was being abused but couldn’t put a finger on the specifics? Talk of domestic violence conjures imagery of crazed husbands battering their wives and children. But on the contrary, such thoughts only skim the surface of this quiet-askept health problem. What was known as domestic violence is now referred to as Intimate Partner Violence (IPV). IPV is abusive behavior by one or both partners in an intimate relationship such as marriage, dating, family, friends and cohabitation. It’s considerably one of the biggest bullies in existence. Fear, pain and dominance are its guise to strip victims of their self-esteem, self-worth, independence, privacy, identity and ultimately, life itself. Identifying the signs of IPV can be the difference between life and death. Like the serpent dragon that it is, domestic violence has many heads. Abuse can be emotional, verbal, psychological, sexual, physical and economical or threats of harm. IPV transcends gender, race, age, nationality, education, economic status and religious backgrounds. Nearly 3 out of 4 Americans personally know someone who is or has been a victim of domestic violence. Reportedly, 1 in 4 women will experience domestic violence in her lifetime. With these grueling statistics shouting from the roof tops, it’s imperative that teens and adults become fully aware. Physical Violence is physical force with the potential for causing death, disability, injury or harm. Physical violence includes scratching,

14 | October 2011

pushing, throwing, grabbing, biting, choking, shaking, slapping, punching, burning and any use of a weapon. Nationally, 70 to 80 percent of intimate partner homicides, regardless of which partner was killed, recorded that the man physically abused the woman sometime before the murder. Sexual Violence is any sexual activity without consent. Abuse may include rape by a stranger, forced sex within a relationship, peeping, sexual harassment such as stalking or harassing phone calls and sexual threats. Everyone has the right to protest and refuse unwanted advances. Psychological/Emotional/Verbal Violence includes behavior such as deliberately humiliating a victim privately or publically, attempting to control what the victim can do, withholding information from a victim, isolating the victim from family and friends, black mail, threatening to kill the victim if they ever leave the relationship and using language or gestures that involve disrespect, desecration and humiliation. Economic Violence is withholding finances from a victim, forcing them to beg for money and prohibiting employment and pursuance of education. Children become collateral damage. Violence interrupts development and may cause them to exhibit aggressive behavior and can also interfere with their school performance. The trauma of violence has lasting effects and spills over into the lives of its victims for generations to come unless the cycle is broken.

A local Jersey mom we interviewed broke her long silence of abuse with these comments, “When the violence kept repeating itself, I felt trapped. The aggressiveness and demands…he became forceful and there was no stopping him. I fought back in the beginning but I grew tired of fighting him. I prayed and the physical part stopped but then the verbal abuse began. The verbal abuse was worst than the physical part. Pray for the strength to walk away. There are systems in place to help you. Get out while you can!” Abusive conditions can lead to serious issues such as depression, eating disorders, drug dependency and consequently, suicide. There is hope. Regina Ridge, program director of services for Empowering Rights of Victims, a division of the Center for Family Services, serves Gloucester and Cumberland County. Empowering Rights of Victims is a program that provides assistance to domestic violence victims and includes crisis intervention, safe houses, court advocates, referrals and transitional housing. Ridge says domestic violence happens more often than not and is not always talked about. For immediate support call their 24hour hotline at (856) 881-3335 or 911. Whether a victim remains in the relationship or is planning an exit, Ridge suggests, “Have a safety plan. Keep a packed bag containing important documents, information, cash, contacts and phone numbers.” Find a safe place. Help is always available. And awareness is a step in the right direction.✲

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


• Over 60 exhibitors • Products, services and income opportunities for today’s modern woman • Daily seminars and demonstrations during all hours of event • Fashion, Health, Wellness, Handmade Jewelry, Kitchen Products and Services, Body & Bath Products,

Confections, Vacation Services, Arts & Crafts, Training Academy, Financial Services, Fashion Accessories, Home Remodeling, Networking Companies, Massage Therapy and Acupuncture, Non-Profit Organizations, Local Businesses, Women’s Business Organizations & More!

a new era in breast care. Malini Iyer, M.D.

Discover The Breast Center at Mullica Hill Commons When a woman discovers a lump in her breast, I realize it’s one of the worst moments of her life. Early diagnosis is key. That’s why, at The Breast Center at Mullica Hill Commons, we offer digital mammograms, ultrasounds, and, if needed, core biopsies with results in just 24 to 48 hours. As a Fox Chase fellowship-trained breast surgeon, I’m proud to partner with a team of experts using the latest technology to detect and treat breast cancer. Your wellness isn’t just our job, it’s our mission.

To learn more call 856.478.0136, or visit www.umhospital.org/breastcenter.

www.southjerseymom.com

155 Bridgeton Pike, Mullica Hill, NJ A service of Underwood-Memorial Hospital

October 2011 | 15


etting an annual screening mammogram is one of the most important things women can do. Early detection saves lives and increases treatment options for women who are diagnosed with breast cancer. According to the American Cancer Society, women should begin annual mammograms by age 40. Screening mammograms are important for all women, even if there is no history of breast cancer in the family. Many factors contribute to a woman’s risk of breast cancer. Research has identified some controllable risk factors. Contraceptive use and hormone therapy after menopause have both been linked to an increased risk of breast cancer. Having two or more alcoholic beverages per day increases a woman’s risk of breast cancer by 11⁄2 times over a woman who does not drink alcohol. And, maintaining a healthy weight throughout your life and being physically active can reduce your risk of breast cancer as well. However, there are factors that can cause breast cancer that cannot be controlled through lifestyle choices. Breast cancer can be hereditary. Booth Radiology has recently partnered with Informed Medical Decisions to provide genetic counseling to patients who may be at risk for breast cancer because of their family history. According to Sherrill Little, MD, head of Women’s Imaging at Booth Radiology, “A simple hereditary breast cancer questionnaire is completed when a woman comes in for a screening mammogram. The questionnaire tries to pinpoint whether there is a personal or family history of breast cancer and whether any relatives have had other forms of cancer such as ovarian cancer, fallopian tube cancer, pancreatic cancer, melanoma, sarcoma, thyroid cancer or uterine cancer.” “If there are any familial links, genetic counseling may be recommended,” says Little. Genetic counselors review a patient’s family health history and discuss whether the patient may be a candidate for genetic testing. Genetic testing looks for a mutation in the BRCA1 or BRCA2 gene which puts a person at a higher risk for various types of cancer, including breast and ovarian cancers. That gene can be passed down from a mother or a father, to a daughter or a son. A simple test can determine whether a patient is positive for the mutation in the BRCA1 or BRCA2 gene. A positive finding does not necessarily mean breast cancer will occur, but it does identify the person as being at a higher risk than the general population. Genetic counselors and the patient’s physician can then help to manage the potential cancer risk. A person at a higher risk may be advised to have a breast MRI in addition to a screening mammogram.The MRI can sometimes detect cancers not evident from a mammogram, but in other cases, a mammogram may pick up irregularities that an MRI does not reveal. Both tests, in conjunction with each other, can sometimes provide a more thorough evaluation for high risk patients, allowing for early detection of any significant changes to the breast tissue. Genetic testing that reveals positive results may also provide the opportunity to alert other family members to the potential risk of hereditary mutations that could be evident in more distant relatives such as aunts or cousins. While annual mammograms are important for every woman over age 40, it’s important to know whether you may be at an increased risk for hereditary breast cancer. Using every tool available to manage your risk is the best way to ensure early detection.✲

G

16 | October 2011

Risk Factors May Identify Need for GENETIC COUNSELING for Hereditary BREAST CANCER By Jeanne Stark

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


Need Help Fighting for Your Child’s Rights? DEEP CLEANING

Let Us Help...

MICHAEL I. INZELBUCH

The Ultimate Cleaning Systems Proudly Serving South Jersey for over 30 Years Residential and Commercial

Attorney-at-Law • IEP Development • Due Process Hearings • Service Procurement Phone: 732.905.0325 Fax: 732.886.0806 Email: Michaelinz@aol.com Lakewoodlaw555@aol.com Member NJ & NY Bars

H&L, Because Clean is Beautiful. Clean is Healthy. Breathe Easier, Beautify, and Renew • H&L removes dangerous allergens like dust mites, mold, & spores. • Stain-free carpets and upholstery smell fresh and new!

One Room Cleaned

$45.00

Two Rooms Cleaned

$32.50 each room

Furniture Steam Cleaning Sofa ..........................$49.95 ea. Love Seat ................$37.95 ea. Chair........................$24.95 ea. $45.00 minimum

Call 856.696.0040 • www.hljanitorial.com Emergency clean-up services available 24/7

The Center for Autism Research at The Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia is looking for participants for a research study focusing on early brain development.

www.southjerseymom.com

Who are we looking for? • Infant siblings of typically developing children • Infant siblings of children with autism

October 2011 | 17


know 2 grow

A Life Full of Possibilities with Down Syndrome

A

fter a year of trying to have a baby, Mia Bachman of Cherry Hill was thrilled when she finally got pregnant. The next nine months were so fabulous she “glowed.” However, upon giving birth to her daughter Ava, doctors gave her unexpected news that Ava had Down Syndrome. Mia describes that day as a “flashbulb” moment – one she will never forget. “It took me a good 48 hours to shake the feelings of sadness, anxiety and fear,” says Mia. “But I have a deep faith and felt God gave me this child and then asked, ‘What are you going to do now?’ So after digesting the news, we looked forward.” Mia armed herself with as much information as she could and surrounded herself with supportive people. She immediately found a BUDS (Bringing Up Down Syndrome) support group and established dear friends she still relies on today. For the first 3 months Ava progressed nicely and then one day, Mia realized she had stopped smiling. Mia casually mentioned this to the pediatrician, who reassured her everything was fine. And then, at 7 months, Mia mentioned that Ava kept raising both her arms over her head, repeatedly. Doctors sent them to a neurologist at the Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia. Ava was diagnosed with Infantile Spasms – a catastrophic, seizure disorder that can affect any child. Doctors said Ava would never walk or talk and she would eventually regress into a vegetative state for the rest of her life. There was no cure and very little hope.

OCTOBER

Again, Mia researched this new diagnosis and turned to her support network. She eventually came upon a controversial therapy for Infantile Spasms – the injection of a steroid called ACTH. Ava’s doctors felt this course would be toxic and advised against it. However, Mia spoke with two families whose children previously received the same diagnosis as Ava and believed ACTH was the only hope and cure. So Mia insisted on the treatment and for the next three months Ava was injected with ACTH. Within days, the seizures stopped and upon completion of her shots, Ava was smiling, laughing and fully engaged again. To this day, Mia feels that having Down’s saved Ava’s life because children without neurological issues rarely recover from Infantile Spasms. Since then, Mia has been by Ava’s side, cheering on anything she sets her mind to. “I stayed on top of her diet, activities and school. I really thought her first words were going to be ‘leave me alone.’ I feel the possibilities are limitless. Forty years ago, the prognosis for a child with Down’s Syndrome was bleak, but now there is much more hope.” Ava is now in fifth grade. She spends half the day in a self-contained class and the other half in an inclusion class. She is an avid reader

By Kate Hogan

Ava (right) with her cousin Katie

and this past spring, Ava was the first Down Syndrome contestant to compete in the Katz JCC’s Youth Triathlon. Over the summer, she swam 30 consecutive laps in a fundraiser for children with cancer. Ava eventually plans on attending college to become a dentist. Mia is amazed at all her child has accomplished over the last 10 years. “The day Ava first walked was like every Christmas and birthday rolled into one. Although it’s a challenge, having Ava has been a gift in so many ways. Her energy is positive and her joy is infectious! She has given me so much more than I have given her. She has enriched my life as well as the lives or our family, friends, teachers and those in our community.”✲

Giveaways!

H Care Bears DVD: Share Bear Shines H Umizoomi DVD: Journey to Numberland H Veggie Tales DVDs: Bob Lends a Helping Hand and Larry Learns to Listen H Dora’s Enchanted Forest Adventures DVD H Olivia Princess for a Day DVD H Dora’s Storybook Adventures DVD Set

Visit www.southjerseymom.com to enter to win these prizes 18 | October 2011

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


O C T O B E R I S B R E A S T C A N C E R AWA R E N E S S M O N T H

Take care of you... So that you can take care of them.

In the workplace and at home, women tend to be the ones that take care of others. But, it is important for you to remember to take care of yourself. Atlantic Medical Imaging would like to remind you that your breast health is an important part of your overall health and wellness. And making your annual mammogram appointment is simple. Just call to schedule your appointment at one of our convenient locations. Evening and weekend appointments are available. Once you arrive, you’ll discover a comfortable and friendly environment, where all your questions will be answered by our team of fellowship-trained breast imaging experts.

So take care of yourself and call today to make your mammogram appointment: (609) 677-XRAY (9729)

For more information or to obtain a full list of our services visit: atlanticmedicalimaging.com amiradiology

SOMERS POINT GALLOWAY 30 East Maryland Ave. 44 E. Jimmie Leeds Rd. www.southjerseymom.com

EGG HARBOR TWP. 3100 Hingston Ave.

CAPE MAY COURT HOUSE 421 Rt. 9 North

amiradiology

MAYS LANDING 4450 Black Horse Pike

WALL TOWNSHIP 2399 Hwy. 34, Unit B

BRICK 495 Jack Martin Blvd October 2011 | 19


Fun Fall and Winter Birthday Party Ideas

By Victoria M. Lees

P

arents of children with fall and winter birthdays rejoice! Here are some great ideas to make birthday parties exciting and fun. Fall is a time for mysteries. What happened to the birthday goodies or the thank you gifts? Pass out magnifying glasses and police detective badges to get the children in the mood to solve a mystery. The birthday child becomes Sherlock Holmes (complete with Holmes’ deerstalker hat, if you like) and the guests become the many Watsons and together the children search the home for clues using simple maps or, for the older children, simple written clues. Remember to keep all “clues” in the home and in familiar places. Make one clue in small font so the children have to use their magnifying glasses to “read” it. The idea of the clues is to take the “detectives” from one room to another, upstairs,

20 | October 2011

downstairs and back again. Maps depict a spot in the room to look for the next clue. Depending on how creative you want to be, you can use store circular cut outs or computer images for a living room, kitchen, bedroom, etc. and draw direction lines to seek the next clue around the coffee table, between the chair and end table, along the bookshelf to peek under a couch cushion or up the stairs, down the hallway and into the bedroom to look in the birthday child’s favorite book or backpack. For short written clues try: “This clue is cold” (in the refrigerator) or “The next clue has been washed” (in the washing machine or dishwasher). How about an “Indian Summer” birthday party? Hand out Indian feather headbands. Hang fall leaves from helium balloon strings or scatter some on the table. Serve popcorn instead of chips and apple cider instead of

lemonade. Have children bring a painting smock. Try a fall craft. Place vivid fall color washable paints on paper plates and have the children dip leaves or pinecones in the paint and then press them onto construction paper to make fall prints. As for those cold winter months, who wouldn’t want a little island fun when it’s snowing outside? How about a Hawaiian Luau? Decorate with old posters of tropical islands from a travel agency and turn the heat up a little. Tell your guests to wear colorful t-shirts and hand out leis. Straw hats and grass skirts are optional. Let them create the music with toy instruments like tambourines, bongos and maracas. Cut fresh fruit into flower or palm tree shapes, add cheese and lunchmeat cut into shapes—on crackers or cut bread if you’d like—all “floating” on “islands” of paper plates. Use silly straws in coconut-shaped plastic cups full of fruit punch. Add bright colored frosting to cupcakes or use colorful Jell-O cut into shapes.Try hula hoops and limbo for added fun. An insect theme widens the imagination in winter when you include a Winter Web of Wonder.You need to set a small room aside for this or do the web first. Tie a small wrapped package (children love to unwrap a thank you gift) to the end of a string and weave the string in and around and through various chairs, tables, drawer handles—nothing breakable—to make the strings look like a web. Design the web so that children need to climb through other web strings, over or under chairs or tables. Always include extra strings you can tie fast so the last participant in the Web of Wonder still has an interesting hunt to find a prize. One child hunts at a time, following his or her string to the prize. Use netting tied with ribbon or tack netting to pipe cleaners shaped like butterfly nets and fill nets with colorful bug or animal fruit snacks. Instead of birthday cake, try chocolate pudding filled with gummy worms. Fall and winter birthdays do not have to be boring. Use some of these ideas to jazz up any child’s party.✲

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


Quality OB/GYN care in your community Dr. Michael Geria at Physicians of Southern New Jersey Obstetrics and Gynecology in Vineland offers compassionate, quality obstetric services and gynecological care to women of all ages, right here in your community. Michael Geria, D.O., FACOOG, is a board-certified OB/GYN with more than 15 years of experience. He received an Outstanding Service Award from the American College of Osteopathic Obstetricians and Gynecologists in 2001. Delivering at the home-like birthing suites at the SJH Regional Medical Center, his practice now offers a quality choice for families who may have thought they needed to travel a long distance to deliver their babies.

Physicians of Southern New Jersey OB/GYN 1051 West Sherman Avenue, Building 1, Unit B, Vineland, NJ 08360 Phone: 856-363-1210 Fax: 856-363-1211

Where the pieces of the PUZZLE come TOGETHER ... PROBLEMS TREATED INCLUDE: • ADD/ADHD • Depression & Anxiety • Oppositional & Defiant • Autism & Asperger’s • Learning & Academic Deficits • Divorce & Separation

Specializing in helping children, adolescents, and their families achieve optimal mental and emotional health

KATHERINE PÉREZ-RIVERA, PH.D. NJ Licensed Psychologist #4352

(856) 383-0585 • PITMAN • MARLTON •

All services provided in ENGLISH or SPANISH EVENING & WEEKEND hours • SAME-DAY appointments www.southjerseymom.com

October 2011 | 21


Sam Playcare One Free Week!

F ERIN G N OW O F R FULL YEA ! S PROG RAM

FLEXIBLE SCHEDULING 3 or 5 Day Options!

Half or Full Day Programs!

New

Low Prices!

Tumble Times, Mini-Sports, Circle Time, Arts & Crafts and more!

5 Day Half Day: $119 5 Day Full Day: $199 3 Day Half Day: $70 3 Day Full Day: $125

20% OFF

819339

Siblings!

1855 Hurville Road Sewell, NJ 08080

Register for One Month and get

ONE WEEK FREE

856-401-8111

With this ad. Not to be combined with any other oer. Expires 12/1/11

www.sportsandmorefun.com

Home Care for Children with Special Needs )

,_WS VY L V\Y UL^ L_OP IP [

^P [ O H

HUK H

60206

) ) ) ) ) )

#! "

$

"# !" ' ! $ & $ " "

! ! ! " ' $ " " #! '! # ' !# ' !" !# !" " !

'

!

$ ! "

P G G B E N J T T J P O

V Q U P Q F P Q M F X JU I U $ I" J " T# "D P V Q P ' O

4 Q S J O H E B M F S P B E D I F S #S Z I J# M!"M O K # " !

22 | October 2011

800-305-3000 ( %%%

'

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


What’s Up With That

Attitude? y s s a S

By Mary Oves

y college roommate and her family visited us this summer, and as our kids watched cartoons after a day at the beach, I overheard a conversation my friend had with her daughter. The young girl was excited to watch the “The Wizards of Waverly Place” starring Selena Gomez because she was not permitted to watch it at home. Not having daughters, I asked my friend why she was so opposed to the show. She told me that her daughter was enamored by Selena Gomez, and although Gomez was beautiful and talented, she was also a smart aleck. She was sarcastic and rude to her parents and bragged about never doing schoolwork. She only treated her parents with respect when she wanted something. My friend became alarmed when her daughter started acting like Selena. She adopted the same sardonic tone of voice and neglected her homework. She rolled her eyes in response to simple requests, walked away dismissively when asked to help around the house and giggled her way out of conversations. At times she was surly, rude and contemptuous. Sound like a typical teenager? She was nine. What makes for a sassy kid? Although a child can be influenced negatively by media, there are many factors that contribute to sassy kids. And there are ways it can be thwarted before it becomes a problem. Joan Romeo, Certified Active Parent Educator/Coach and founder of Parenting Made Easier, publishes An Easier Way, a weekly newsletter with practical articles and tips that help make parenting less of a struggle.

M

We All Deserve A Better Closet!

“Typically,” Romeo says, “children will use sassiness to let their parents know they don’t appreciate the limits being placed on their freedoms.” “Some parents have a very difficult time accepting their child’s negative attitudes toward their rules and may come down hard on their child in the form of punishment, while others parents ignore it, and chalk it up to just a normal phase their child is going through.” Sometimes parents unknowingly make the situation worse. “If parents don’t take kindly to their child’s attitude and their approach is to push back against their child’s behaviors, even if

their child doesn’t get his own way, this style of parenting usually just invites more sassiness or misbehaviors later on, in the form of resentment and rebellion – it’s the child’s only way to let the parent know they can’t be bossed around.” Like in the Disney shows in which the parents rarely rebuke their children’s sassiness, kids in real life will continue to sass their parents if they are not taught that it’s wrong. “With a more permissive parent, who typically avoids any conflict with their child, and is willing to let things go, unfortunately their children learn that it’s okay to treat their parents and others disrespectfully,” says Romeo. Being too permissive or too rigid are both self-defeating. “Both approaches miss valuable opportunities to teach children to respectfully disagree. Parents and children are always going to come in conflict when it comes to rules and limits. But, they can be taught to do it respectfully, without sarcasm, hurtful remarks or any other form of disrespect, but it must work both ways.” Romeo agrees parents and children must decide that mutual respect in the home is the most important key to mutual admiration. “One of the best ways to foster respect in the home is to always give it first!”✲

Joan Romeo is a Certified Active Parenting Educator and Comprehensive Parent Coach. She teaches the Active Parenting method that teaches parents effective parenting skills and techniques to help them raise independent, responsible, cooperative and respectful children. This complete approach to parenting was developed by Dr. Michael H. Popkin, founder of Active Parenting Publishers, a leader in parent education programs since 1983. Parents can join Romeo’s mailing list at www.ParentingMadeEasier.com.

• Closets • Home offices • Garage cabinets • Pantries • Storage solutions • And more!

1.800.753.1334 • www.storagecreations.com 609.977.9648 • storagecreations@comcast.net www.southjerseymom.com

October 2011 | 23


24 | October 2011

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


just born

Looking for the latest gadgets, toys, books or family related products? Look no further! Each month, we highlight the latest and greatest just for you. Take a look at these “just born” products and add them to your list of must haves! 1

2

3

4

5

6

DREAM WATER Dreaming of a better night’s sleep? Then you are in luck: Dream Water is the first water that helps you relax and fall asleep! This all-natural sleep enhancer has zero calories, no preservatives and natural active ingredients (GABA, Melatonin,5-HTP). $2.99, available at Walmart, Walgreens & GNC AHH BRA Don’t feel blah in your bra! The Ahh Bra enhances your assets, eliminates discomfort and trouble spots and is perfect for everyday wear. Woman of all shapes and sizes will feel confident with Ahh Bra’s contoured fit, superior support and unique wearability. $19.95 and up, available at www.rhondashear.com BEARPAW SHOES The tiniest fashionistas will be sporting the most glam footwear on the playground this fall with Bearpaw Shoes new line of sheepskin boots designed specifically for young one’s tootsies. Hot pink with rivet accents, black on black with a leopard print sheen and zebra striped boots will delight little girls. $30 and up, visit www.bearpawshoes.com to find a local retailer. LEGRUFFLES Legruffles are a ruffle-themed legwarmer and armwarmer knitted with a beautiful cotton blend yarn giving a soft, flowing feel. A great way to protect legs from the cold, to show off that beautiful set of bloomers or to match perfectly with pettiskirts. $12.50 - $17.50, www.Huggalugsusa.com SMUCKER’S SNACK’N WAFFLES Smucker’s Snack’n Waffles are the perfect option when your family needs a breakfast or snack on the run. Convenient, microwavable waffles available in 4 flavors: blueberry, maple, cinnamon and chocolate chip. Ready to eat after 15 seconds in the microwave & already have sweetness baked right in. $2.99 4-pack, available in frozen breakfast aisle. GOODY GOOD STUFF CANDY Give healthier, natural candy this Halloween! Completely vegetarian and free of gelatin, gluten, dairy, nuts, soy, fat, preservatives, and food dyes, Goody Good Stuff

is a delicious, innovative alternative for kids as well as adults. 8 delicious varieties, including 4 vegetarian options. $1.99 per bag, available at Bed, Bath and Beyond and www.goodygoodstuff.com 7

MERRELL SHOES Merrell has reinvented its old-school icon, the Wilderness boots and had created super cute styles for girls and boys. The main goal of this style is to inspire more kids and families to get outside! $60-75, www.merrell.com

8

FASHION PLAYTES FashionPlaytes.com is a design-it-yourself fashion site where girls can design clothes that express their unique style! Pick your style, color and size and then add ribbons, ruffles and rhinestones. From rocker chic to sweet and sassy, there’s something for everyone. Prices vary, www.fashionplaytes.com

9

ANIMAL PLANET COSTUMES These unique costumes by Animal Planet will transform your baby during the Halloween craze and turn them into the talk of the party. Size 12-24 months. Choose from cuddly chimpanzee, love bird, scary raptor, cute little monarch butterfly and more. $34.99 and up, available at Party City and other locations.

10

HEAVEN, GOD’S PROMISE FOR ME A little girl and boy ponder the death of their dear grandmother and are taken on a wonderful tour of heaven in Anne Graham Lotz’s Heaven, God’s Promise For Me. The book helps parents talk to their children about tragedy in the world around them and adequately offers an explanation about what happens after death. $16.99, www.amazon.com and local book stores

11

PLAY-DOH PLAY SETS This fall, Play-Doh will keep the little ones happy and creative! Have a pizza party with the Twirl ‘n Top Pizza Shop playset or mix colors with Elmo with the Sesame Street Color Mixer playset or pretend to be a dentist with the Doctor Drill ‘n Fill playset. $12.99 and up, available at toy stores and www.HasbroToyShop.com

9

6

2 5

3

1

10 4 8

7

11 www.southjerseymom.com

October 2011 | 25


business spotlight

Tutoring Club’s Unique Methods Foster Learning Success

S

even yers after opening in South Jersey, Tutoring Club of Cherry Hill/Voorhees has helped over 3,500 students.With unique methods and a guarantee to raise each child’s academic level in less time and at lower cost than any other competing program, Tutoring Club teaches children to become successful learners.

All Kids Benefit For years, tutoring was seen as something for children who struggle academically. Now, however, that perception is changing and enrollments in tutoring programs have skyrocketed. “Many of the students at our centers are already at or above grade level. We are helping them hone their learning skills in the same way a child would go to a basketball or soccer camp to improve his or her playing ability,” says Alan Cohen, Owner/Director,Tutoring Club of Cherry Hill/Voorhees.Tutoring Club’s mission is to reduce stress and build confidence by starting students at a level they can handle and then progressing through grade levels as rapidly as they can. Leader in Curriculum Using the exclusive TutorAid Curriculum, the most advanced in tutoring, Tutoring Club maintains a low student-to-tutor ratio and provides qualified instructors, committed to each child’s success. The Club pinpoints problems and corrects them, motivates each student to keep trying and

confers with parents and classroom teachers to keep them aware of the student’s progress. SAT Preparation Every year more than a million high school students go through the hallowed ordeal known as the SAT. As important as cumulative GPA, SAT scores determine whether or not students gain entrance to their college of choice. Small wonder educational companies have made millions of dollars in SAT preparation courses. After all, what parent wouldn’t want to give their child an edge in what might well be one of the most important tests they will ever take? However, the time-honored SAT changed in 2005. The changes to the SAT have created an opportunity for Tutoring Club. Founded 26 years ago, and with centers in more than 100 cities throughout the U.S., Tutoring Club’s methodology lends itself perfectly to SAT preparedness. When students enroll at Tutoring Club, they are given a diagnostic exam to determine any areas of weakness in particular skill areas. As for SAT preparedness, these skill areas are matched to the test sections. The resulting curriculum is then tailored to these problem areas, enabling the problem areas to become strengths. The result: significantly higher scores. Tutoring Club’s unique reward system provides motivation for each student to succeed by earning tokens that can be redeemed for prizes. Since its founding 28 years ago, Tutoring Club has helped more than 100,000 children become successful learners.✲ Tutoring Club of Cherry Hill/Voorhees is located at 484 Evesham Rd. in the Short Hills Towne Center (behind Starbucks) on Evesham Road. They are open Monday – Thursday 11-8 and Saturdays 9-2. For more information, call (856) 616-8808 or email cherryhillnj@tutoringclub.com.You can also visit them online at www.tutoringclub.com. 26 | October 2011

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


SAVE THE DATE

QUALITY CARE RESOURCE & REFERRAL SERVICES, INC. Cape May • Cumberland • Gloucester • Salem

2011 Child Development Conference

October 10th

“Building Relationships for Our Children” FEATURING: • Dan Hodgins, Keynote • Continental Breakfast & Lunch Buffet • Market Vendors • Jazz on the Veranda PARENTS WITH CHILDREN (1-4pm) • Parenting Workshops Offered • Child Care Available for Attending Parents

WORKSHOPS: • Child Development Skills • Facing the Bully • Better Business Tips • Positive Discipline • Marketing Strategies • CDA Classes • Etc.

Call 856.462.6800 or visit us on our website at www.qcrrinc.org for more information.

www.southjerseymom.com

October 2011 | 27


KITCHEN RENOVATION & FLOORING SPECIAL LET US DESIGN YOUR DREAM KITCHEN!

• Kitchens • Bathrooms • Countertops • Entertainment Centers

• Carpet • Vinyl • Laminate • Hardwood • Ceramic

Come visit one of the largest showrooms in South Jersey—16 full kitchens displays

BIG SUMMER SALE! Kraftmaid, Shrock and Decora Cabinets on sale! Call for free estimate. “Cheaper than the Big Box Stores” 3.5% Sales Tax

20 Old Salem Road • Woodstown, NJ

856.769.2490 • www.matteokitchens.com

Students at our special education schools experience a school day as it should be—filled with discovery, achievement, learning and friendship. Here, they have people they know they can count on—outstanding teachers, therapists, counselors, psychologists and job coaches who constantly encourage and support them. Our students feel cherished, well cared for and respected for a very good reason—it is part of our mission and our commitment. Our schools are welcoming places where students feel at home and are able to enjoy a rich and rewarding social life. With individualized attention, on-site therapies and vocational training, our schools deliver unparalleled services for students with special needs. New Jersey Department of Education certified special education teachers, licensed therapists and counselors provide expert, advanced instruction and support … along with plenty of smiles. These unique services are provided at NO COST for families. Find out if private special education is the right fit for your child.

Our staff can help answer your questions. To find out more about what programs may be right for your child, call us at

Brookfield Schools

Park Academy And we make sure Garfield your Larc School —or visit our website at 1-800-697-8555 child is ready for it. www.privatespecialedsnj.com Copyright

HollyDELL, Inc. Kingsway Learning Center St. John of God Community Services

2011 The Coalition of Southern New Jersey Private Special Education Schools

Private special education is an option for many children, and provided at no cost to families. Finding the appropriate educational option for your child can sometimes be a complicated process. We have access to education and legal experts who can help you navigate through the process. For more information or for help in understanding your rights, call us at 1-800-697-8555. 28 | October 2011

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter


For a complete list of events, log onto www.southjerseymom.com

To submit your event, send an email to calendar@southjerseymom.com. Entries are due six weeks prior to the event and are filled on a first come first serve basis. Space is limited.

ATLANTIC COUNTY South Jersey Pumpkin Show 2011 October 8-9, 10a.m. to 6p.m. Shop from over 100 craftsmen and home show companies; everything from wreaths, pottery, jewelry, baskets to sunrooms. The big pumpkin weigh-off will be held on Sat at 12 p.m. and pumpkins will be on exhibit all weekend. The festival will showcase the Little Miss Pumpkin Show Pageant, friendly hayrides, festival food, farmers market, largest baked pumpkin pie, amusement rides, games, scarecrows and Dog Parade. Local bands performing country, classic rock, bluegrass and jazz! $2/person, kids 3 & under free, first 200 kids receive a pumpkin. Atlantic County 4-H Fairground, 3210 Rte. 50, Egg Harbor City. www.sjpumpkinshow.com or call (856) 765-0118.

BURLINGTON COUNTY The Haunted Prison October 7-29 from Dusk to 10 p.m. The Haunted Prison is a Halloween event featuring actors, scenery, etc. Historic Prison Museum, 128 High St., Mt. Holly. (609) 265-5476 or www.prisonhaunt.com. Family Funday Sunday October 23 at 2 p.m. Popular children’s performer Jackie Jester invites children to sing and dance along to a fun and active mix of songs, movements and storytelling. $5/person; 2 & under free. Medford Arts Center (the MAC), 18 N. Main St., Medford. (609) 654-6033. Father and Child Adventure Weekend October 21-23 YMCA Camp Ockanickon will celebrate the unique bond between a father and child with a father and child adventure weekend. Participants will have fun during the day learning survival skills, climbing a 50’ climbing tower or simply relaxing while on a leisurely canoe ride. Enjoy a variety of outstanding activities and programs, eat good

www.southjerseymom.com

food and strengthen the bonds of family. (609) 654-8225 or www.ycamp.org

CAMDEN COUNTY Stratford Fall Festival October 1 from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Rides, games, activities for the kids, live entertainment, car show, crafters & green fair. Yellin School Grounds (Vassar & Warwick Rds), Stratford. (raindate Oct 2nd) www.StratfordFallFestival. com. 20th Annual Blackwood Pumpkin Festival October 2 from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Enjoy a day filled with fun in and around the Blackwood Rotary Library, 15 S. Black Horse Pike, Blackwood. Food, games, live music and crafts with more than 200 vendors and 4 stages for entertainment. Hayrides, moon bounce, amusement rides, pumpkin carving contest, pony rides, face painting, pumpkin painting, costume contest & more. Rain date 10/9. (856) 227-3091 or (609) 405-0306. “The Rainbow Fish” October 7 & 8 A classic children’s story brought to life with a magical musical journey under the sea. A fun and lively story with colorful characters for the young ones and an interactive and funny script for the older ones. And a lesson for all–young and old. Oct 7 at 7p & Oct 8 at 1 & 3:30p. All shows in the Scottish Rite Auditorium, 315 White Horse Pike, Collingswood. $5/person. www.collingswoodcommunity theatre.com. Night of Reggae October 15 — 7 p.m. to midnight Featuring world renown Reggae recording artist and performer Mystic Bowie. The joint will be jumpin’ and jammin’ with lots of music, food & fun. Tickets are $25 to support our work on behalf of abused and neglected children in Camden County. Collingswood Community Center, Collingswood. Tickets available online at

www.casaofcamdencounty.org or call (856) 858-4488. Safe Trick-or-Treating October 30 from 12 to 4 p.m. Have a howling good time at the Camden Children’s Garden by using the Garden to do your trick-or-treating. Children must be accompanied by an adult. Trick-or-treat parade at 2 p.m. Stop by the Creepy concession stand to purchase some fall goodies. Camden Children’s Garden, 3 Riverside Dr, Camden. www.CamdenChildrensGarden.org or (856) 365-8733.

CAPE MAY COUNTY Making Strides Against Breast Cancer Walk October 16 at 8:30 a.m. Each step you’ll take is personal. And each dollar you raise will help save lives. Join others at 6th and the Boardwalk in Ocean City to raise money and awareness for Breast Cancer. While there is no registration fee or minimum fundraising amount, people of all ages are welcome to participate and encouraged to raise funds. If you’d like to help, sign up and walk! www.makingstrides.acsevents.org.

CUMBERLAND COUNTY Free CASA Advocate Training October 4, 6, 11 & 13 from 5 to 9p Court Appointed Special Advocates of Cumberland, Gloucester and Salem Counties is an independent, non-profit organization whose primary responsibility is to find safe, permanent and nurturing homes for children who have been abused and neglected. You can make a difference in the lives of one of these children by volunteering as a CASA advocate. Maurice Plaza, 1 East Vine St, Millville. If interested, call (856) 459-0061 or e-mail Janelle@casaofcgs.org. Children’s Harvest Crusade October 9 at 3 p.m. Bring the kids to Calvary Chapel of Vineland for a special day of fun FREE activities, including bounce house carnival, games, prizes and

things 2 do

October Calendar

food. All ages welcome. Sponsored by Calvary Chapel Philadelphia. Located at Calvary Chapel Vineland, 930 N. Main Rd, Vineland. (215) 969-1520, ext. 352 for info.

GLOUCESTER COUNTY 8th Annual Italian Heritage Festival of Gloucester County October 2 from 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. All day fun for all ages! Entertainers, Italian food, music, kid’s activities, crafts and more. Featuring Uncle Floyd. Free admission & free parking. RiverWinds Community Center, 1000 RiverWinds Dr., West Deptford. For info visit www.facebook.com/GCItalian or call (856) 494-3289. Family Friendly Halloween Adventure October 15 & 22 from 3 to 7 p.m. Bring the family to this fun day of crafts, games, food, hayride, campfire stories & scarecrow making. Costume contest & trick or treating each day at 6 p.m. Proceeds benefit Camp Fun ‘N Sun, a day and residential camp for individuals with special needs. $10/child. Camp Sun ‘N Fun, 1036 N Tuckahoe Rd, Williamstown. (856) 629-4502.

SALEM COUNTY 4th Annual Fido’s Festival USA® October 22 & 23 from 10a to 5p Fido’s Festival USA® presents “HOWLIN’ HALLOWEEN,” a funfilled weekend for dogs, dog lovers & families. Activities include a Howlin’ Halloween parade, Spooktacular Masquerade Contest, Spellbinding Frisbee contest, dock diving and lure racing, expert wellness presentations, vendors, food, entertainment & more. Advanced tickets $7 or $12 weekend pass. Gate tickets $10. Dogs & children under 12 are free. Visit www.fidosfestivalusa.com or call (856) 854-FIDO (3436). Salem County Fairgrounds, 735 Route 40, Woodstown.

October 2011 | 29


resource guide

CHILDCARE LOOKING FOR A HIGH QUALITY PRESCHOOL OR KINDERGARTEN PROGRAM? Cornerstone Montessori School delivers fun, safe and enriching Montessori programs. Highly experienced and certified Montessori teachers with MA degree. Cornerstone is an AMS member school. Call Today! (856) 685-3258 or email Jlee.cms@gmail.com or visit www.CornerstoneMontessoriNJ.com.

CLASSES CARA ASHLEY SCHOOL OF DANCE IN HAMMONTON Celebrating 9 years of quality dance education! Ballet, tap, hip-hop, jazz, contemporary, pre-school combo & acro for ages 3 and up and adult classes. Birthday parties available. Register now! Call (609) 567-6566 or email caraashleydance@yahoo.com.

EVENTS VISIT ABSECON LIGHTHOUSE Lighthouse Challenge of NJ – a weekend of exploration of NJ’s historic lighthouses, Oct 15 & 16. Open 10/15, 8a-8p, and Sunday, 8a-6p. See Atlantic City at night from the top of Absecon Lighthouse! Go to www.lighthousechallengenj.org or call (609) 449-1360.

GIFT IDEAS GREAT PERSONALIZED GIFTS FOR ALL AGES At JUST FOR LITTLE PEOPLE (and others, too!) we specialize in new baby gifts both hand-painted or embroidered. Beautifully wrapped and available for pick-up at our new Gibbsboro location, or we can ship it for you. Call (856) 627-8901 or check out www.justforlittlepeople.com.

South Jersey

Have MOM delivered to your home! For just

$29.99/year you will receive:

4 Home delivery of South Jersey MOM, ❑ 12 monthly issues 4 Our monthly e-newsletter in your inbox ❑

To purchase your subscription via mail, cut out the form and mail with payment to: Superior Graphics P.O. Box 2413, Vineland, NJ 08362 or purchase online at www.southjerseymom.com

Name ________________________________________________________________ Address ______________________________________________________________ City___________________________________State_____ Zip ____________________ Phone ________________________________________________________________ Email ________________________________________________________________

JOB OPPORTUNITIES EARN EXTRA INCOME ON YOUR SCHEDULE Are you a DRIVEN, MOTIVATED FEMALE who wants to earn extra income on your schedule? No selling, stocking or delivering products. National Health & Wellness Company with 26 yrs of proven success. Call Adrienne at (856) 305-3490 for more info. START YOUR OWN AVON BUSINESS FOR ONLY $10! Choose your own hours and determine your own income! Visit www.youravon.com/adamendez or call Ada, Independent Avon Rep, today at (609) 456-5467 for more info.

PARTIES CELEBRATE CREATIVELY! Abrakadoodle’s CUSTOMIZED CELEBRATIONS are perfect for BIRTHDAYS, PLAY DATES and SCOUTING events. Every child takes home a FRAMED masterpiece! Hosted at your location we provide an ARTFULLY FUN teacher, materials & frames. Call (856) 914-0521 or visit www.abrakadoodle.com/nj01. BONBON’S PARTIES IS OFFERING $10 OFF TO SJ MOM READERS! Face Painting * Balloon Art * Glitter Tattoos. For Older Children: Balloon University or Face Painting College. Characters * Super Heroes * Princesses. For availability call (856) 701-8734 or visit www.bonbonsparties.com. FINE COSTUME JEWELRY AND HIGH END HANDBAGS We specialize in baby earrings and wedding jewelry. We take designer handbags on consignment. Call 877-YES-5544 or visit www.yourelegantstyle.com. Book your home party today!

30 | October 2011

Is your child the CUTEST KID IN TOWN? Every month, South Jersey MOM will feature a local child on the cover! If you think you have the cutest kid in town, send a 4x6 photo and a $15 entry fee (per household) to P.O. Box 2413, Vineland, NJ 08362-2413. Please make checks payable to Superior Graphics. If your child(ren) is/are selected, we will arrange a FREE professional photo shoot and they could be on our next cover for all your friends and family to see! Sorry, photos cannot be returned. Parent Name: ________________________________________________ Address: ____________________________________________________ City______________________ State_____ Zip ____________________ Phone:______________________________________________________ Child’s Name & DOB: ________________________________________ __________________________________________________________ Email: ______________________________________________________

Visit our website and sign up for our e-newsletter



Mammograms on your schedule.

Stratford / Washington Township / West Deptford / Woodbury www.BoothRadiology.com / 856-848-4998


Turn static files into dynamic content formats.

Create a flipbook
Issuu converts static files into: digital portfolios, online yearbooks, online catalogs, digital photo albums and more. Sign up and create your flipbook.