THESIS PROCESS BOOK
ANGIE WIJAYA
THESIS PROCESS BOOK
ANGIE WIJAYA
TABLE OF CONTENTS
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A VERY ROUGH START
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LET’S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS
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SO WHAT’S GOING ON NOW?
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SCOPE IT IN / SCOPE IT OUT
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A FUN STRESSFUL TIME! BUT ALSO, IT’S NOW OR NEVER!
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A VERY ROUGH START
APPROX. ALL OF 01/2020
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First project of the semester. So daunting and so scary. We started of the year with a bang. A confusing one. I had been dreaming about this semester ever since I first went to a BFA Thesis Show Reception. I was truly so excited to finally be able to push a project so much, that I could have a whole exhibition out of it. Our project delved into asking questions. And I was so confused. Mostly at myself. For wanting this exhibition to happen so badly, I hadn't really thought about what topic I wanted to explore. My first round of questions went something like this:
TO WHAT EXTENT IS MEMORY CHANGED BY OUR PRESENT THOUGHTS? HOW REPLACEABLE ARE WE? CAN REALITY BE IGNORED? HOW MUCH IS RELIGION USED TO JUSTIFY SOMEONE'S ACTIONS? ARE PEOPLE INNATELY GOOD/EVIL? CAN PEOPLE EVER COEXIST PEACEFULLY? HOW MUCH DOES OUR CHILDHOOD DEFINE OUR FUTURE? CAN WE EVER REACH A CONSTANT STATE OF HAPPINESS? HOW EASILY IS TRUST
BROKEN? HOW MUCH DO FIRST IMPRESSIONS AFFECT OUR OVERALL IMPRESSION OF SOMEONE? HOW MANY FRIENDSHIPS WILL WE BE ABLE TO RETAIN IN OUR LIFETIME? IS THE HUMAN RACE MEANT TO LIVE FOREVER? CAN OBSESSION BE A GOOD THING? HOW MUCH PAIN CAN WE ENDURE? TO WHAT EXTENT DO WE CRAVE STABILITY? COULD WE LIVE OFF THE SAME MEAL FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES? IF YOU COULD
LIVE FOREVER, WOULD YOU? CAN WE EVER BE SATISFIED BY LIVING THROUGH SOMEONE ELSE'S HAPPINESS? WHAT BARRIERS DOES LANGUAGE CREATE? CAN WE LIVE WITHOUT COMMITMENTS? IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE NO PASSIONS IN LIFE? WHAT DOES IT FEEL LIKE TO HATE SOMEONE? HOW DO YOU PRIORITIZE YOUR LIFE? TO WHAT EXTENT WOULD YOU SACRIFICE YOUR OWN HAPPINESS FOR SUCCESS? IS IT EVER
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And if you count them, there are not even 50 in total. We had to have 50, yet I could not come up with any. Round after round of these question creations, I realized that there seemed to be a pattern in the list of questions of my peers that I started to see a certain theme. But mine had none. I was just asking questions that seemed interesting to me. And so I went on. I went on and kept exploring and researching different points of interest in my life. And that is when I started getting the hang of it, they were not just about asking questions that you would find interesting but more about how this relates to me. These questions were ultimately to help me find my way to thesis. And so I had to start making and researching topics that mattered to me. And then it made things easier. If I could show you my mind map, I would. But let me describe to you that after editing these questions to things that I would care about if I knew the answers to, it got easier because it was more interesting.
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How can we break the barriers that language creates? How can we transform or harness hatred into good actions? How can we know when we need to prioritize our own wellbeing? How can we manage feeling overwhelmed? What if access to healthcare could be guaranteed? How can we retain childlike innocence? How can we be more comfortable with the idea of regret? How can we identify latent trauma in ourselves? What if girl and boy children were equally as valuable in Asian culture? How can we make deciding on a major for college easier? How can we be more comfortable with trusting our gut? What if we could have a redo of our past actions? How can we influence how we think of our memories? What if social media did not control our first impressions of people? How can we normalize paternity leave? What if starting a family affected women and men equally? How can Third Culture Kids feel more comfortable with the idea of home? How can we maintain a passion for learning? How can we cultivate empathy? How can we nurture creativity? What if we were more optimistic? How can we nurture optimism? How can we learn what our parents lives were like before we were born? How can we become more comfortable with not knowing? How can we make the electoral college more fair?
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How can we better prepare people for retirement? What if we were more fearless? How can we break habits? How can we learn how to be alone? How can we be less angry at ourselves? How can we vent out our frustrations in a non-destructive way? What if we could communicate with our pets? How can we influence and transform traditional family views? What if we could predict when we will fall in love? What if we could have a redo of our past actions? How can we create safe spaces for learning? How can we feel better about getting old? How can we repay our parents for what they have done for us? What if we could never return to the country we were born in? How can we justify meat consumption? What if we all spoke one language? How can we learn visually? What if the government provided more culturally responsive services with better languagebetter cross-cultural understanding, having better cultural competence and sensitivity? How can we make people care about voting? How can we be less replaceable in the workplace? What if siblings were not compared by their parents? What if we could live without commitments? What if we treated obsession as a good thing? What if siblings were not compared by their parents? What if our glory days were still ahead of us?
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Now that I had my 50 questions, I had to really focus on how to create a vehicle where these questions would be able to live. My way in into this was trying to show how much frustration this project brought to me. I resorted to my early freshmen year love for sculpture and decided that if this was going to help me learn what to make for my thesis, I should just try routes I have never ventured in before. And so I started playing with PLASTER. And well, I started using all the different materials I could think of. I wanted the audience to be able to have different experiences trying to open up these different balls of questions.
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I wanted to explore the process of trying to create these questions by pushing what the physical objects could be. I printed small pieces of paper with each question and dedicated many nights to the sculpture room. I have never tested out plaster before but with the advice from Angela and Jiayi, I managed to get it to work. But now, where are they going to live?
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SO I WENT WITH THIS IDEA AND IT VERY MUCH DID NOT WORK. I wanted to recreate stone displays with different sized spaces where these balls of questions could live. Because my questions ranged from more broad questions to more personal serious ones, I decided to also range out the different sizes that these balls could be.
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It was looking crafty and I very much did not intend it to do so. I needed to reshift my situation because time was running out. My classmates kept emphasizing that what was interesting about this project was the fact that they could physically try to break them. That act was the one that needed highlighting. And so, I decided to break them all myself. And record it as a video. I set up a phone holder, chose one night in the studio when it was more relatively empty and started getting to work. This smashing process was more fun than predicted and so, everyone wanted to break some to. Angela, Jiayi and Sharon were the only ones in the studio that night and they took part in this mess. Even though I wanted the pieces of paper inside each ball to reveal the question, it seemed that they had gotten more destroyed than I thought. So when I started making progress on my video I decided to create that sporadic energy of breaking the balls in the way that the questions popped up on the screen.
FOOTAGE OF CHAOTIC STUDIO ENERGY.
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And just like that, in a month and a half, we were done with this project. This project really made me think about thesis in a very special way. Now, looking back, I can see the resemblance of what struggles I kept having. Whether it be how do I look at the smaller picture and ask questions that matter to me, to looking at the bigger aspect of how is the viewer going to interact with it.
ULTIMATELY, I AM HAPPY THIS PROJECT GOT DONE.
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LET’S GET DOWN TO BUSINESS
02/2020
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Post- research anthology book is when I started looking at what I could really do with this topic of memory. And it really took a long time to figure out where I was going and where this thesis project could be leading. First off, we were asked to start crafting our thesis statements. I focused on these ones to start sparking ideas How can Third Culture Kids feel more comfortable with the idea of home? What if we could rework-revise-rewrite our What if we treated obsession as a good thing? own childhood-past-memory? How can we break habits?
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And that is when I started writing the first draft of my thesis statement. My main fear in life has always been being scared of the possibility of forgetting. Whether it be because of age, or our own mental capacity for remembering, I have always felt intrigued by the chance that all our experiences have no real grounding in our memories without photos, journals, or videos to help us relive them. This thesis project examines the capabilities of human recollection as the vessel for memories and experiences. It questions the accuracy of how we remember our past through the reconstruction of old memories based on artifacts. By the exploration of how our current mentality on a certain person or subject affects our recollection and memory associated with that person. With the increasing amount
of technology that helps us record day to day thoughts and actions, I want to explore how much an artifact of a certain moment will impact how we attempt to relive them. This body of work will challenge the belief that our actions are recorded and preserved in our memories without fallibility. Through the process of repetition and association, this project aims to both construct a more linear approach to remembering and reassembling what we think our memories are based on. But also challenge the viewer in the questioning of their more distant memories of childhood and home. By exploring the psychology and literature surrounding memory, these projects will be based on the manipulation of video and photography as a representation of our distorted memory. As well as an interactive installation that will further engage viewers in the examinations of human memory and recollection.
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But that was only round one. I trimmed it down and narrowed down to the aspects that made this thesis statement interesting to start exploring.
MECHANICS OF MEMORY- REFUGEES- IDEA OF HOME REMAINING IN THE TANGIBLE-INTANGIBLE OBJECTS 3. HOW IS MEMORY RECORDED IN THE TECHNOLOGY AROUND US
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Now here is to Round Two-
For my thesis project, I want to focus on the creating, storing and archiving of memories in the context of home, and identity. As a third culture kid, I have always played around with the idea of home as an indeterminate aspect of my identity. I have never really known how to define it, and have been perplexed every time I am asked to explain - where I am from. This made each memory I had from childhood, interaction with my family, seem to have more importance and grounding in how it relates to who I am today. The first one being the investigation of the mechanical and functional characteristics of the brain. I wanted to explore how the brain functions to actually retain, store, and use memories. I came across an article that detailed the differences between our perception of memory and what our mind is truly capable of. Unlike computers that are physically able to retain algorithms and programs that help explain what each content’s purpose is, the human brain works on the ability of generalizing memories. It highlighted the fact that we should not be concerned over how our memories seem to break down and deteriorate as we get older because the way that memories are created in our minds, are never truly intact to begin with. This is why when the connection of childhood comes into play, I want to analyze the relationship between the actual functions of the brain and our desire to remember. By probing into people’s restructuring of memories, I hope to question to what extent our memories are fragmented and reconstructed when recounting and retelling the past. The second aspect of memory I want to highlight is its importance in the matter of self-identity and home. With my estranged idea of home combined with the idea of memory, I decided to shift my research into the way it relates to those whose homes
have been forcibly taken away from them or those who have been denied the possibility of what they imagined home is supposed to be. In a more global scope, the topic of memory also becomes important when dealing with the idea of refugees. Through the exploration of how home becomes part of someone’s identity, I sought out to see how memory is formed and shaped by the different people that deny and accept new cultures and populations, especially when dealing with objects becoming representations of abstract ideas like home. This topic is also important to me because of the idea of always wanting to be an American citizen and how it doesn’t only take root in how it translates to refugees and immigrants but also in the concept of the American dream. Personally, I can see how seeking after the concept of the American passport and citizenship has affected and strained relationships. For example, my mom will tell me of how her only dream in life used to be to become an American citizen, and maybe that still is. Through my thesis project, I want to interview family members in how their idea of home has been distorted after living in the country they once dreamed about living in.
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With this project I want to further my research to put my ideas into context of what is relevant to today. I hope to delve into what it means to retrace, and restructure our memories and how it deals with our identity.
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This led to research. I had so much to go off of. But little content so far. That is why my research anthology was divided into three distinct aspects1. How does it work- Memory in the context of the brain. The actual function of recording data 2. How does it change- Memory in context of retention, representation, and distortion. 3. How is it reflected- Memory in the technology around us.
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HOW DOES IT WORK?
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HOW DOES IT CHANGE?
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HOW IS IT REFLECTED?
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“SO WHAT IS GOING ON NOW”
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03/16—03/22
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DEAR CHANGE, Change has never not been part of our lives and that applies especially to our circumstances right now. The hardest part that I’ve had to come to terms with was the inability to say goodbyes. With the semester cut short in the middle of spring break, I was unable to properly thank and cherish the last moments I had with friends, professors, campus and Boston. Change has messed up what I thought was the foreseeable future. Our senior last semester that we will never get back hurts to think about because I know how important it is in people’s memories. And yes, of course there are up-sides to this crisis. I’ve been able to talk to people for hours through facetime, play games online together, and even watch movies together. But it’s really dawning on me that for the next couple months I will be living alone and - I will only be able to see people through a screen. My theory is that here in Miami, where people STILL don’t see the severity of the problempeople are still outside walking together, in big groups at the pool and more- that it’s going to get really bad in the next 2-3 weeks and that people will really start to freak out and sell-out grocery stores. But I’ve mentioned this to many of mwwy friends that although I’ve been sad for days now, it’s hard to justify our sadness when there’s a pandemic that we need to worry about. Now onto the second part of this letter. I think that this past week has been as if I were in a limbo state of wondering how to approach a schedule that we have established for the past 4 years -in terms of studio work, brainstorming etc. My project has been on pause since we last worked on it but now that everything is official we really aren’t going back, it’s time to make
55 changes. My project is now going to adapt in the way that I approach the ultimate goal of this project. Now that we don’t have an exhibition, I’m wondering what the best possible outcome could be- in terms of how happy I am with the project, and what I can do with my resources. I think the best thing in my opinion right now is to deep dive into the digital since it seems as if attempting to create something physical will not satisfy what I thought the end exhibition could be like. At my disposal I have my room and computer and some paper. I want to limit the amount of materials that I purchase from the outside, not only because of safety reasons but also because I want to respect the current place that I am staying at by not creating a too much of a mess while I work- especially if it’s work that I will ultimately don’t know if I am able to keep. Impermanence in our work I think has never been part of my process because most of what I make is digital in a sense, and I’ve come to the realization that digital never dies. But I guess now our thesis exhibitions will have a very ephemeral quality about them. Not only in the limited time they could be displayed online but also the limited time that people care about them, not only the audience of the show but also us, as designers. It’s been hard to press play on the thesis project because of how little importance it seems that this holds in the big picture scale of things. I’m currently re-assessing how I can come to care about this project again- when it seems to be disconnected to our current lives. Love, Angie
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SCOPE IT IN / SCOPE IT OUT
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03/22—04/14
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Progress- Currently I felt like there was none. Or maybe it was mostly because that’s how I felt at the moment. My method of making had now shifted into taking it day-to-day. Our weekly one-on-one meetings, small group meetings, big group meetings really were the driving power
NAMES LOCATIONS LANGUAGE
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to my motivation to keep going. With the start of the quarantine it seemed as if thesis should be the last thing on everybody’s mind. But as I kept working on it, the realization that it was one of the only things that remained constant, made me more excited about how to keep going.
Now, my thesis notes were now scattered on separate pieces of papers. All attempting to make sense of this new thesis project that was now shifting to the digital.
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HOW DOES THE EXPERIENCE BECOME PART OF THE CONTENT?
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WHAT IS THE NARRATIVE?
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NON-LINEAR VS. LINEAR
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DISCOVERY VS. TELLING.
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WHAT IS THE ESSENCE OF THE STORY?
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And then after scoping out during the research anthology, narrowing in with the videos, to now, I have decided on a happy medium. For my post-quarantine, revised thesis project, I will be focusing on-
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RECLAIMING THE CHINESEINDONESIAN IDENTITY Through this process, I kept struggling having to compromise between the bigger and more personal narrative of the story. After meeting with faculty and alum, I decided to narrow it down to the core of the message. The core representation of the reason why the Chinese-Indonesian Identity is so important.
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Now finally, here is to my final round of my thesis statement.
As a third culture kid, home has always played an indeterminate aspect of my identity. But only recently have I put into question how my parents, who are Chinese Indonesians, might question and feel the same way. In my thesis project, I want to focus on the sense of belonging and identity in the context of home explored through the lens of language and names. My work explores the estranged idea of home combined with the idea of belonging, especially how it relates to those whose perception of home has been affected by others unwilling to accept new cultures and populations. By exploring a more specific case, I want to investigate how memory and acceptance relates to my parent’s identity as Chinese
Indonesians. Ethnically Chinese in Indonesians have always had a complicated history in terms of their identity and sense of belonging in Indonesia, as they have even had regulations and laws passed in order to limit and control the amount of Chinese culture that is able to be displayed in public or even to change their names. This body of work presents how identity is intertwined with the small traces and artifacts -tangible and intangible- of their ancestry and identity they still have. Through this thesis project I want to investigate how language, names, and history have been kept in the memory of Chinese Indonesians and especially in the reclaiming of the Chinese Indonesian identity.
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A FUN, STRESSFUL TIME!
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BUT ALSO, IT’S NOW OR NEVER! 04/15—NOW
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Now it was really time to get working. After all the rounds of back and forth, there was no time to question whether or not we were making sufficient progress- we just had to keep making. And so I started sketching out the wireframes for the website. I ultimately wanted it to be all a one-page website to help create a linear narrative and help guide people through the research, background, context and videos.
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CREATING TWO NARRATIVES.
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I wanted to utilize some coding within the website to create a more interactive experience for the users. Similarly to what I wanted to achieve with the first round of sketches, I wanted to create little interactive cards where people could hover or click on them and more information would be revealed. Although I had first used actual historical figures as the little
cards, people soon told me that it was not what they thought. The realization that he was not part of my family confused people as it was such a personal topic. And so this shift in direction led to the overlapping aspects of a timeline in the background with cards of how my personal narrative is tied to the political events that happened at that time.
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The video was my take on how I could visualize the change of name. How was I going to explain the transformation of how people had to erase their previous identity for a made up oneAnd so I decided to use my interest in motion graphics and push this concept through typography and movement. My first draft seemed quite basic and plain as it staggered one effect after the other, but as I continued adding layers I found another happy medium that I was really, really excited about.
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So, I have arrived to the end. The thesis project is now called WHAT’S IN A NAME? and I couldn’t be more excited that the end is finally here. With so many bumps and problems that we encountered this semester, finally being able to see a cohesive end to our four years at BU makes me so emotional. Through this experience, I have come to realize the amount of thought, care, and edits it takes to create a project that I can be proud of it being part of my BFA Thesis Show. The research made me question myself, investigate my past and look forward to what I can make as a designer in the future. Even though this semester was not what I expected it to be, it really forced me to venture into new territory, whether it be learning how to live by myself- or even, how to learn to get back to creating work. This process, although a little bit different from our past semesters, still had all the aspects of our design life that I held so special. Thankfully, we could still have crits, have long late nights at the studio, virtually of course, and also being able to constantly talk to our professor. I cannot believe it is finally here. A big, big, big shoutout to our thesis faculty advisor - Yael!!! And another big hug to my roommates- we truly have experienced everything together for the past four years, and our quarantine was no different. Also, to our class of 2020. WE DID IT. See you at commencement.
Thesis Process Book May 2020 Typeset in GT Super and Reglo Designed by Angie Wijaya Printed by Blurb