A&U February 2016 (Niecy Nash) by A&U: America's AIDS Magazine

FEBRUARY 2016 • ISSUE 256 • AMERICA’S AIDS MAGAZINE

ACTIVE FAITH

REV. STACEY LATIMER DEVOTES HIS LIFE TO AIDS AWARENESS

Healing Spirit

Joyce McDonald Testifies Through Art

plus • Maria Mejia-Laing • David Fawcett • Precious A. Jackson • Pastor Mitchell Jones

niecy

NASH

MAKES HIV PREVENTION & PROTECTING YOUTH A PRIORITY

New Genvoya速 is now available

Actual Size

Onepill pill contains One contains elvitegravir, cobicistat, emtricitabine, elvitegravir, cobicistat, emtricitabine, and tenofovir (TAF). and tenofoviralafenamide alafenamide (TAF). Ask your healthcare provider Ask your healthcare provider if GENVOYA is right for you.

if GENVOYA is right for you. To learn more visit GENVOYA.com To learn more visit

GENVOYA.com

Please see Brief Summary of Patient Information with important warnings on the following pages.

Brief Summary of Patient Information about GENVOYA GENVOYA (jen-VOY-uh) (elvitegravir, cobicistat, emtricitabine, and tenofovir alafenamide) tablets Important: Ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist about medicines that should not be taken with GENVOYA. There may be new information about GENVOYA. This information is only a summary and does not take the place of talking with your healthcare provider about your medical condition or treatment.

What is the most important information I should know about GENVOYA? GENVOYA can cause serious side effects, including: • Build-up of lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis). Lactic acidosis may happen in some people who take GENVOYA. Lactic acidosis is a serious medical emergency that can lead to death. Lactic acidosis can be hard to identify early, because the symptoms could seem like symptoms of other health problems. Call your healthcare provider right away if you get any of the following symptoms, which could be signs of lactic acidosis: • • • • • • •

feel very weak or tired have unusual (not normal) muscle pain have trouble breathing have stomach pain with nausea or vomiting feel cold, especially in your arms and legs feel dizzy or lightheaded have a fast or irregular heartbeat

• Severe liver problems. Severe liver problems may happen in people who take GENVOYA. In some cases, these liver problems can lead to death. Your liver may become large and you may develop fat in your liver. Call your healthcare provider right away if you get any of the following symptoms of liver problems: • your skin or the white part of your eyes turns yellow (jaundice) • dark “tea-colored” urine • light-colored bowel movements (stools) • loss of appetite for several days or longer • nausea • stomach pain • You may be more likely to get lactic acidosis or severe liver problems if you are female, very overweight (obese), or have been taking GENVOYA for a long time. • Worsening of Hepatitis B infection. GENVOYA is not for use to treat chronic hepatitis B virus (HBV). If you have HBV infection and take GENVOYA, your HBV may get worse (flare-up) if you stop taking GENVOYA. A “flare-up” is when your HBV infection suddenly returns in a worse way than before. • Do not run out of GENVOYA. Refill your prescription or talk to your healthcare provider before your GENVOYA is all gone. • Do not stop taking GENVOYA without first talking to your healthcare provider. • If you stop taking GENVOYA, your healthcare provider will need to check your health often and do blood tests regularly for several months to check your HBV infection. Tell your healthcare provider about any new or unusual symptoms you may have after you stop taking GENVOYA.

What is GENVOYA? GENVOYA is a prescription medicine that is used without other HIV-1 medicines to treat HIV-1 in people 12 years of age and older: • who have not received HIV-1 medicines in the past or • to replace their current HIV-1 medicines in people who have been on the same HIV-1 medicines for at least 6 months, have an amount of HIV-1 in their blood (“viral load”) that is less than 50 copies/mL, and have never failed past HIV-1 treatment HIV-1 is the virus that causes AIDS. GENVOYA contains the prescription medicines elvitegravir (VITEKTA®), cobicistat (TYBOST®), emtricitabine (EMTRIVA®) and tenofovir alafenamide. It is not known if GENVOYA is safe and effective in children under 12 years of age. When used to treat HIV-1 infection, GENVOYA may: • Reduce the amount of HIV-1 in your blood. This is called “viral load”. • Increase the number of CD4+ (T) cells in your blood that help fight off other infections. Reducing the amount of HIV-1 and increasing the CD4+ (T) cells in your blood may help improve your immune system. This may reduce your risk of death or getting infections that can happen when your immune system is weak (opportunistic infections). GENVOYA does not cure HIV-1 infection or AIDS. You must stay on continuous HIV-1 therapy to control HIV-1 infection and decrease HIV-related illnesses. Avoid doing things that can spread HIV-1 infection to others: • Do not share or re-use needles or other injection equipment. • Do not share personal items that can have blood or body fluids on them, like toothbrushes and razor blades. • Do not have any kind of sex without protection. Always practice safer sex by using a latex or polyurethane condom to lower the chance of sexual contact with semen, vaginal secretions, or blood. Ask your healthcare provider if you have any questions about how to prevent passing HIV-1 to other people.

Who should not take GENVOYA? Do not take GENVOYA if you also take a medicine that contains: • alfuzosin hydrochloride (Uroxatral®) • carbamazepine (Carbatrol®, Epitol®, Equetro®, Tegretol®, Tegretol-XR®, Teril®) • cisapride (Propulsid®, Propulsid Quicksolv®) • ergot-containing medicines, including: dihydroergotamine mesylate (D.H.E. 45®, Migranal®), ergotamine tartrate (Cafergot®, Migergot®, Ergostat®, Medihaler Ergotamine®, Wigraine®, Wigrettes®), and methylergonovine maleate (Ergotrate®, Methergine®) • lovastatin (Advicor®, Altoprev®, Mevacor®) • midazolam, when taken by mouth • phenobarbital (Luminal®) • phenytoin (Dilantin®, Phenytek®) • pimozide (Orap®) • rifampin (Rifadin®, Rifamate®, Rifater®, Rimactane®) • sildenafil (Revatio®), when used for treating lung problems • simvastatin (Simcor®, Vytorin®, Zocor®) • triazolam (Halcion®) • the herb St. John’s wort or a product that contains St. John’s wort

What should I tell my healthcare provider before taking GENVOYA? Before taking GENVOYA, tell your healthcare provider if you: • have liver problems including hepatitis B infection • have kidney or bone problems • have any other medical conditions • are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if GENVOYA can harm your unborn baby. Tell your healthcare provider if you become pregnant while taking GENVOYA. Pregnancy registry: there is a pregnancy registry for women who take HIV-1 medicines during pregnancy. The purpose of this registry is to collect information about the health of you and your baby. Talk with your healthcare provider about how you can take part in this registry. • are breastfeeding or plan to breastfeed. Do not breastfeed if you take GENVOYA. – You should not breastfeed if you have HIV-1 because of the risk of passing HIV-1 to your baby. – At least one of the medicines in GENVOYA can pass to your baby in your breast milk. It is not known if the other medicines in GENVOYA can pass into your breast milk. – Talk with your healthcare provider about the best way to feed your baby. Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take, including prescription and over-the-counter medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements. Other medicines may affect how GENVOYA works. Some medicines may interact with GENVOYA. Keep a list of your medicines and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist when you get a new medicine. • You can ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist for a list of medicines that interact with GENVOYA. • Do not start a new medicine without telling your healthcare provider. Your healthcare provider can tell you if it is safe to take GENVOYA with other medicines.

How should I take GENVOYA?

• Take GENVOYA exactly as your healthcare provider tells • • • • • • •

you to take it. GENVOYA is taken by itself (not with other HIV-1 medicines) to treat HIV-1 infection. GENVOYA is usually taken 1 time each day. Take GENVOYA with food. If you need to take a medicine for indigestion (antacid) that contains aluminum and magnesium hydroxide or calcium carbonate during treatment with GENVOYA, take it at least 2 hours before or after you take GENVOYA. Do not change your dose or stop taking GENVOYA without first talking with your healthcare provider. Stay under a healthcare provider’s care when taking GENVOYA. Do not miss a dose of GENVOYA. If you take too much GENVOYA, call your healthcare provider or go to the nearest hospital emergency room right away. When your GENVOYA supply starts to run low, get more from your healthcare provider or pharmacy. This is very important because the amount of virus in your blood may increase if the medicine is stopped for even a short time. The virus may develop resistance to GENVOYA and become harder to treat.

What are the possible side effects of GENVOYA? GENVOYA may cause serious side effects, including: • See “What is the most important information I should know about GENVOYA?” • Changes in body fat can happen in people who take HIV-1 medicine. These changes may include increased amount of fat in the upper back and neck (“buffalo hump”), breast, and around the middle of your body (trunk). Loss of fat from the legs, arms and face may also happen. The exact cause and long-term health effects of these conditions are not known. • Changes in your immune system (Immune Reconstitution Syndrome) can happen when you start taking HIV-1 medicines. Your immune system may get stronger and begin to fight infections that have been hidden in your body for a long time. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you start having any new symptoms after starting your HIV-1 medicine. • New or worse kidney problems, including kidney failure. Your healthcare provider should do blood and urine tests to check your kidneys before you start and while you are taking GENVOYA. Your healthcare provider may tell you to stop taking GENVOYA if you develop new or worse kidney problems. • Bone problems can happen in some people who take GENVOYA. Bone problems may include bone pain, softening or thinning (which may lead to fractures). Your healthcare provider may need to do tests to check your bones. The most common side effect of GENVOYA is nausea. Tell your healthcare provider if you have any side effect that bothers you or that does not go away. • These are not all the possible side effects of GENVOYA. For more information, ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist. • Call your doctor for medical advice about side effects. You may report side effects to FDA at 1-800-FDA-1088.

General information about the safe and effective use of GENVOYA. Medicines are sometimes prescribed for purposes other than those listed in a Patient Information leaflet. Do not use GENVOYA for a condition for which it was not prescribed. Do not give GENVOYA to other people, even if they have the same symptoms you have. It may harm them. This Brief Summary summarizes the most important information about GENVOYA. If you would like more information, talk with your healthcare provider. You can ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist for information about GENVOYA that is written for health professionals. For more information, call 1-800-445-3235 or go to www.GENVOYA.com. Keep GENVOYA and all medicines out of reach of children. Issued: November 2015

EMTRIVA, GENVOYA, the GENVOYA Logo, GILEAD, the GILEAD Logo, GSI, TYBOST, and VITEKTA are trademarks of Gilead Sciences, Inc., or its related companies. All other marks referenced herein are the property of their respective owners. © 2015 Gilead Sciences, Inc. All rights reserved. GENC0001 11/15

c o n t e n t s February 2016

42 Cover Emmy-Blessed Actress Niecy Nash Talks to A&U’s Sean Black About Her 1995 Breakthrough Role In the AIDS-Themed Boys on the Side and Her Ongoing Commitment to HIV Prevention & Raising Awareness About School Violence

Departments

Features 32 Embracing Authenticity Pastor Mitchell Jones Fights Against Homophobia to Prevent HIV 34 Gallery Artist & Longterm Survivor Joyce McDonald Mixes Faith & Creativity 38 Of Lust, Men, Meth & Healing David Fawcett Explores Practices that Put Gay Men at Risk 48 Straight to the Point Precious A. Jackson Advocates for a Greater Focus on Heterosexual Men 50 Reverent Life Rev. Stacey Latimer Uses the Power of the Word to Help People Flock to AIDS Awareness 30 Nonfiction Love Wins by Tim Patten cover and inside photos of Nash by Robert Ector

Frontdesk

Mailbox

NewsBreak

Ruby’s Rap

viewfinder 19

Just*in Time

Our Story, Our Time

Role Call

Brave New World

lifeguide 54

Hep Talk

Destination: Cure

The Culture of AIDS

Lifelines

Survival Guide

A&U Frontdesk

Continuum of Care

ocus on the future, the next five years, the next ten years, and beyond—that was President Obama’s aim in his latest and last State of the Union address. It was a speech full of the promise of positive change, reiterating his policies to make Americans more secure in terms of their employment and healthcare, among other safety nets, in a new technological age. “We made change work for us, always extending America’s promise outward, to the next frontier, to more people,” he said. “And because we did—because we saw opportunity where others saw only peril—we emerged stronger and better than before.” I was heartened to hear President Obama include HIV/AIDS in his list of winnable battles to secure a brighter future for our next generation. “Right now, we’re on track to end the scourge of HIV/AIDS. That’s within our grasp....” Over the past fifteen years, our country has seen progress in the fight against AIDS in leaps and bounds. In the highest office in our land, President George W. Bush initiated PEPFAR and lifting the ban on HIV-positive visitors to our country, which President Obama put it into effect. Obama also developed our country’s first National AIDS Strategy and successfully passed the Affordable Care Act, arguably making it easier for Americans to obtain and expand their healthcare coverage. On the grass-roots level, advocates are still out in force and fighting for funding and to change HIV criminalization laws. Workers in public health are educating physicians about PrEP and organizing communities to break down barriers to testing and treatment. Researchers are committed to creating formulations of HIV meds that require less frequent dosing and do not tax the body quite as much. All of this is working—new HIV cases are down overall. Yet there is still work to be done—rates of infection are up among gay and bisexual African-American and Latino men and the South continues to be devastated. And too few individuals living with HIV are reaching undetectable viral loads. We need to take Obama’s speech as a guide and continue to focus on the future.

A M E R I C A’ S A I D S M A G A Z I N E issue 256 vol. 25 no. 2 February 2016 editorial offices: (518) 426-9010 fax: (518) 436-5354 Editor in Chief & Publisher David Waggoner

Let’s call it strategic nurturing. It’s a very maternal or paternal approach—caring about right now but also realizing that our children and others’ children will grow up one day. We need to continue to care about not only the next generation but the generation after that. We in the AIDS community are family, after all. That’s why I love that actress and AIDS advocate Niecy Nash, who graces our cover this month, describes herself as a maternal type, not only in the roles she takes but also in the nurturance of her family, her community, and beyond. “I really am a lover of people, and I want them to be well and better. I want them to be a little better after I leave than they were before I came. So, I am a natural caregiver and in that respect I find that I am in a very comfortable place with very comfortable footing when playing Denise ‘Didi’ Ortley,” she states about the nurse she played on Getting On. It’s a sentiment that spills over into her AIDS advocacy for APLA and The DIVA Foundation. Niecy’s notion of motherhood embraces the whole world! This issue celebrates acts of nurturance, whether it is self-care as an individual living with HIV/AIDS or the care of others impacted by the disease. As a reverend, an artist, and a longterm survivor, this month’s Gallery subject, Joyce McDonald, advocates for speaking out about traumas and how we can heal from them. Maria Mejia-Laing, this month’s guest columnist and also a longterm survivor, hopes to empower women living with HIV who are suffering from traumas shaped by abuse and intimate partner violence. Another longterm survivor featured in this issue, the Reverend Stacey Latimer, uses his experiences, knowledge, and compassion to bring his message of AIDS awareness to communities near and far. As we mark National Black HIV/AIDS Awareness Day this month, let’s remember that old chestnut in a new way: It takes a village to raise a child. It takes a village to ensure a continuum of care.

DAVID WAGGONER

Managing Editor: Michael Needle Senior Editors: Dann Dulin, Sean Black Editor at Large: Chip Alfred Special Projects Editor: Lester Strong Literary Editor: Brent Calderwood Arts Editor: Alina Oswald Consulting Editor: Nick Steele Copy Editor: Maureen Hunter Contributing Editors: Sarah Churchill Downes, Reed Massengill, Kelly McQuain, Lesléa Newman, Robert E. Penn Contributing Writers: Tyeshia Alston, Noël Alumit, V. Anderson, Heather Arculeo, Larry Buhl, Ruby Comer, Diane Goettel, Sally Hessney, George M. Johnson, Angela Leroux-Lindsey, Mark Rebernik, Dale Reynolds, Elizabeth Rodgers, David Rosenberg, Corey Saucier, Mariel Selbovitz, Justin B. Terry-Smith, Patricia Nell Warren, Chuck Willman, Jeannie Wraight, Robert Zukowski Art Director: Timothy J. Haines Contributing Photographers: Jordan Ancel, Davidd Batalon, Mark Bennington, Tom Bianchi, Sean Black, Adam Bouska, Brian Bowen Smith, Tim Courtney, Duane Cramer, Stephen Churchill Downes, Greg Gorman, Francis Hills, Renée Jacobs, Tara Lessard, Tom McGovern, Nancy Perry, Annie Tritt National Advertising Director: Harold Burdick, Jr. Sales & Marketing: David L. Bonitatibus Advertising Sales Office: (518) 426-9010 National Advertising Representative: Rivendell Media (212) 242-6863 Subscription Info: (518) 426-9010 Circulation Manager: Robert Schelepanow Bookkeeper: Richard Garcia Board of Directors President: David Waggoner Vice President: Harold Burdick, Jr. Secretary: Richard Garcia Founding Board Members: Mark S. Labrecque, 1961–1992, Christopher Hewitt, 1946–2004, Mark Galbraith, 1962–2011 In Memoriam: Bill Jacobson, 1939–2005 Rhomylly B. Forbes, 1963–2011 • Chris Companik, 1957–2012 Nancy Ellegate, 1959–2015 A&U (ISSN 1074-0872) is published by Art & Understanding, Inc., 25 Monroe St., Suite 205, Albany, NY 12210-2743, USA. For A&U advertising information please call 518-426-9010; for subscriptions and address changes please call 518-426-9010; for letters to the editor and unsolicited manuscripts write A&U Magazine, 25 Monroe Street, Albany, New York 12210; fax 518-436-5354; or e-mail: mailbox@ aumag.org. All unsolicited manuscripts that do not have a S.A.S.E. cannot be returned and will not be acknowledged. ©2016 Art & Understanding, Inc. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. A&U may not be reproduced in any manner, either in whole or in part, without written permission of the publisher. A&U and the graphic representations thereof are the registered trademarks of Art & Understanding, Inc., a 501 (c) (3) nonprofit organization. Individual Subscription rates: $24.95 (12 issues). Institutional rates: $80.00 (12 issues). For subscriptions outside the USA and possessions, $30.95/Canada, $49.95/international, payable in advance in U.S. currency. First North American serial rights revert to contributors upon publication. A&U retains the right to anthologize work in further issues, as well as in microform or reprinting on the Internet within the context of each issue. Statements of writers, artists and advertisers are not necessarily those of the publisher. Readers note: subjects and contributors to A&U are both HIV-positive and HIV-negative. In the absence of a specific statement herein concerning the serostatus of any individual mentioned in, or contributing material to, this publication, no inference is made with respect thereto and none should be implied. Letters written to A&U or its contributors are assumed intended for publication. Art & Understanding, Inc. assumes no responsibility or liability for unsolicited submissions and does not guarantee the return thereof. PostMaster: Please send address corrections to A&U Magazine, 25 Monroe Street, Suite 205, Albany NY 12210-2743, USA

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x o b l i ma Come On Aileen! I found the story and life of Aileen Getty to be very fascinating and illuminating [cover story, “Positive Connection,” by Dann Dulin, December 2015]. Her whole

daughter-in-law: “Aileen is magic. What a survivor. She’s been in and out of hospitals so many times but she fights. Aileen is a tiny woman yet she uses her courage, her brain, and every power in herself. Her spirit is keeping her alive.” What a great tribute from a great lady like Dame Elizabeth Taylor. —Wolff Edwards Pacifica, California

DECEMBER 2015 • ISSUE 254 • AMERICA’S AIDS MAGAZINE

aileen

GETTY

THE AIDS ADVOCATE BRINGS JOY TO THE WORLD

walking on sunshine

ANDREA JOHNSON FIGHTS STIGMA WITH A POSITIVE PHOTO CAMPAIGN

To PrEP or Not to PrEP The headline in your article is correct: Damon L. Jacobs is a “PrEP Pioneer” [by Chip Alfred, December 2015]. He is an educator and he wanted to teach people about pre-exposure prophylaxis. Damon took a chance and it seems that he has won. This is the new way in protecting people against HIV. Now, everybody is talking about the antiretroviral medicine commonly known as Truvada, though many physicians have never heard of it. I just went on PrEP myself and I feel really great. I encourage everyone to look into PrEP as an option. —Bill Farnesto Wilmington, Delaware

“I just love what the late Liz was quoted as saying about her former daughter-in-law: ‘Aileen is magic. What a survivor. She’s been in and out of hospitals so many times but she fights....Her spirit is keeping her alive.’”

METHOD OF MODERN LOVE

DAMON L. JACOBS WANTS YOU TO HAVE THE FACTS ABOUT PrEP

No-Brainer

connection to J. Paul Getty, Elizabeth Taylor, Michael Wilding (a very fine British actor) and his son Christopher is like a true Hollywood drama. I can remember the 1950s when Elizabeth Taylor was married to Michael Wilding. Yes, I am that old. Of course, later, it wasn’t a very happy time for Aileen. She went through hell with her addictions and her HIV diagnosis. Anyway, she seems to have overcome all the bad times and now the good times—or better times—are here. I just love what the late Liz was quoted as saying about her former

Not to take anything away from Aileen Getty and her struggles living with HIV, but I couldn’t help thinking when reading the article that individuals with far fewer resources have far greater chances of negative health outcomes. If you are poor, you hardly ever get a second chance for recovery and staying on top of your health. I thought the article should have addressed this disparity more directly. Not all of us have Getty’s resources. —Wayne Jarvis Putnam Bayonne, New Jersey

Send e-mail to: mailbox@aumag.org Send letters to: Mailbox, A&U, 25 Monroe Street, Suite 205, Albany, NY 12210 Or click on “Mailbox” on our Web site’s home page: www.aumag.org Tweet Us @au_magazine Facebook: http://on.fb.me/AUFANPAGE All correspondence requires name, address, and daytime phone number for confirmation. Letters may be edited for length and clarity.

A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

photo by Sean Black

Congratulations to Dr. Judith Feinberg and her fight against the establishment in the city of Cincinnati, Ohio [“On the Road,” by Larry Buhl, December 2015]. With the rise in HIV and hepatitis C cases in the country, don’t we need needle-exchange programs? I’m glad the federal government has loosened its ban on funding. —Maris Panamera St. Paul, Minnesota

NEWSBREAK

photo by Stuart Locklear

Pedro Zamora Scholarships Honoring six high school and college undergrads who have made an outstanding contribution to public service and leadership in the fight against HIV/AIDS, the Pedro Zamora Young Leaders Scholarship shines a light on the promise of the next generation. Like Pedro Zamora, the AIDS educator, activist and co-star of MTV’s The Real World (San Francisco) in the early nineties, these young students are using their voices and skill sets to make a positive difference at their schools, in their communities, or in their academic fields. Zamora, you may remember, shot into the public eye when he disclosed his HIV-positive status on the television show and used his on-air and off-air time to destigmatize the disease and educate about HIV/AIDS. He passed away from AIDS-related causes in 1994, but his legacy lives on. The National AIDS Memorial Grove, the San Francisco-based non-profit that grants the scholarships, recently announced the latest recipients. Launched in 2009, the scholarship Abdon Orrostieta (at podium) receives is open to high school seniors and college undergraduates, but this year’s recipients are all the scholarship during a World AIDS at the college level and hail from six different states. The scholarship program is primarily Day ceremony in San Francisco, as funded through grants provided by UnitedHealthcare, Wells Fargo, and Project Inform. Stu- (eft to right) Chanel DeLaney, Uniteddents may use the funds to support their ongoing educational endeavors in both their chosen Healthcare; Mark Ng, Wells Fargo; and fields and community work related to HIV/AIDS. The program awarded more than $40,000 Eric Ciasullo, National AIDS Memorial this year (with two students receiving two-year awards for 2015 and 2016), the largest distriGrove, look on. bution of funds in the history of the scholarship. The scholarships recipients include: Raymond Jackson • School: Essex County College, Newark, New Jersey • Currently working on: Associate’s degree in business administration • Goals & Activities: work with the Global Economics Department at the CDC to improve financial resources of individuals living with HIV/AIDS in developing countries; currently works as a peer educator at Project (WOW), where he uses his experiences and insights as an individual living with HIV to educate. Adrian Nava (second-year recipient) • School: University of Denver, Denver, Colorado • Currently working on: In third year toward a bachelor’s in International Studies and Sociology. • Goals & Activities: Work in the nonprofit sector, with a focus on health and healthcare access for LGBT people and people of color; already five-years strong in the sexual health field, at state and national levels. Uzo Okoro • School: Brown University, Providence, Rhode Island • Currently working on: A senior majoring in public health, soon to pursue her medical degree at The Warren Alpert Medical School of Brown University • Goals & Activities: Chosen to be a Youth Ambassador for NYHAAD (National Youth HIV/AIDS Awareness Day) by Advocates for Youth; advocates for HIV-positive survivors in community spaces and on social media; lead coordinator of the Sexual Health Awareness Group (SHAG), a sexual peer education organization at Brown. Abdon Orrostieta (two-year scholarship recipient) • School: University of Central Florida, Orlando, Florida. Currently working on: third year • Goals & Activities: Volunteers with Latino Salud, a nonprofit HIV services agency; member of the Health Awareness and Prevention Society. Shira Smillie • School: University of Richmond, Richmond, Virginia • Currently working on: sophomore double-majoring in American Studies and Latin American Latino and Iberian Studies; studies the intersections of identity, poverty, power and privilege in the United States. • Goals & Activities: Works at the University of Pennsylvania’s School of Nursing on an HIV/STI prevention program for black youth with mental illness. Manuel Venegas (two-year scholarship recipient) • School: University of Washington, Seattle, Washington • Currently working on: In third year, studying Latin American & Caribbean Studies with an emphasis on Global Health. • Goals & Activities: AIDS advocacy, organizing, and mobilizing on community, state, and national levels; chosen to be a Youth Ambassador for NYHAAD by Advocates for Youth; serves on the City of Seattle LGBT Commission, drawing on his own experiences as an individual living with HIV. For more information about the Pedro Zamora Young Leaders Scholarship and other National AIDS Memorial programs, log on to: www.aidsmemorial.org or reach the organization by phone at (415) 765-0497.

Long-Acting Injectable The first two-drug long-acting injectable might soon be available as a maintenance treatment option for individuals living with HIV-1 who have achieved viral suppression. A long-acting injectable formulation, delivered under the skin, would allow for less frequent dosing, potentially better FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

Benefiting

Rain or shine, this ride is amazing, and so important to the LGBT community living with AIDS/HIV. Being able to bring awareness to the AIDS epidemic before, during, and after the Ride is my reason for riding. I go into the Ride with one goal and finish accomplishing so much more. — Andrew, Rider No. 109

Boston 14

York w e n o t

016

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25, 2 – 3 2 r e mb

brakingaidsride.org 866-858-6877 A&U • NOVEMBER 2015

NewsBreak

safety, tolerability, and drug-interaction profiles, and the chance for improved adherence. The injectable candidate is based on two drugs: cabotegravir, a drug candidate of the integrase strand transfer inhibitor class from ViiV Healthcare (formed as a collaboration of GSK, Pfizer Inc. and Shionogi Limited), and rilpivirine, an already approved NNRTI from Janssen Sciences Ireland UC. Cabotegravir is also currently being studied as a once-daily oral tablet formulation as well as a long-acting nanosuspension formulation for intramuscular injection. “As a company committed to innovation in the field of HIV, this agreement with Janssen will enable us to progress the development of the first long-acting, injectable two drug regimen,” said Dominique Limet, CEO, ViiV Healthcare, in a prepared release. “If successful, this regimen would offer people living with HIV who have achieved viral suppression an alternative option to the standard oral daily, three drug therapy.” ViiV Healthcare has partnered with Janssen to develop the agent and initiate a Phase III study to test the efficacy, safety, and tolerability later in 2016. ViiV Healthcare and Janssen have collaborated previously when they began an investigation to develop and bring to market a single-tablet anti-HIV regimen that combined dolutegravir (ViiV) and rilpivirine. That agreement was made in 2014 and a Phase III trial began in May of last year.

Living Pos Though relatively new to HIV/AIDS activism and advocacy, writer and blogger Connie Rose Shearer has wasted no time in getting the word out on social media and beyond. Committed to providing forums for everyone who wants to discuss HIV, and other infections, she recently founded a blog site called LivingPos.com to help empower and educate others. As treatment is never a straightforward path and daily lives have their ups and downs, she plans to feature not only the successes but also the struggles. She also seeks to counter the stigma foisted upon individuals living with one or more infections. Shearer is adept at all things Internet, as her professional work involves writing blogs for various ticketing sites as well as videogame walkthroughs. Living in Las Vegas, the advocate has a daugher and grandson. A&U caught up with her to discuss her new website as well as the power of social media. A&U: Why did you start your blog and why did you decide to include voices other than your own? Connie Rose Shearer: Why did I start my blog? That’s a great story. I started it because I found out that my voice could save someone’s life. I started blogging on my own because I was banned from blogging on Positive Singles dating site for defending a friend who is HIV-positive from ridicule, and I lost my forum to discuss HIV. I had spent so long in the HIV closet and blogging six years on Positive Singles lit a fire inside me. A woman found me via Facebook and told me that reading my stories of happy, successful living with HIV on Positive Singles kept her from committing suicide after she was diagnosed with HIV. She currently lives in Africa, so she faces real stigma, real discrimination and many give up quickly. My stories prompted her to start medication, begin counseling, and want to live again. We are still friends today. She is why I started my blog. Why did I open the new site up to other bloggers? Because I am only one story and what if someone needs help about something else? What about the people who have a story to tell but are not sure how to create a blog or what to do? I opened my site up for those people because we are HEQUALS [an amalgam of the Hs she discusses below and “equal”]. The site is dedicated to all four incurable Hs, HIV, HSV [herpessimplex virus], HPV, HCV. (I mention HCV because not all genotypes are curable and some do not benefit from the currently available hep C cures.) Many people deal with co-infection or only one infection, and they need to understand their H, find ways to live with their H, successful ways to disclose, and so on. I thought of this while blogging on Positive Singles also, since that site is dedicated to all four Hs. I learned so much about HSV and HCV on that site that I knew that if I was going to have a website I had to offer all that information to everyone else. Is there a limit to social media when doing AIDS advocacy? Yes, reaching negative people. Many people using social media as advocates are advocating for people who are secretly living with HIV/AIDS and they cannot discuss, share, anything that has to do with HIV on their friend’s walls. So, social media has strict limits for an advocate. You featured Andrew Pulsipher, a man living with HIV whose photo featuring his HIV-negative wife and children went viral last year. Since then, he has launched a “viral wave” to unite other advocate voices on the Internet. Why did you think it was important to provide a platform for his story? Why were you excited about his “viral wave” idea? It was important for me to share his story because I need people to understand that there is no risky behavior needed at all to get HIV. If you’re human, you are at risk. My daughter Sami, who just turned twenty-one, was exposed to HIV during the C-section and when I breastfed and by the grace of God she is still HIV-negative. But she dealt with horrible stigma and ridicule growing up because people in our small community knew about my disease and she stood by my side and was my protector, my little shero her whole life. So I feel Andrew deserves my help because I could have been his mom; it’s my job. I chose to marry the man who infected me without asking for an HIV test, and I accept full responsibility for my actions; I am excited about this campaign because seeing these young people—like Andrew and Derek, or like Ieshia and Marissa, Erica and a few others I have met—be so brave in the face of unimaginable adversity [inspires me] and I do this because they deserve my support and encouragement. I am excited because they are alive to be here to do this with us, while so many others, like Ryan White, are not. I have never had a problem with my HIV; many others have, though. So I come along and keep an eye out for trouble because these are my people—this is my family. My family members, other than my parents, want nothing to do with me now that I speak about and try to bring awareness to HIV. When it comes to my friends, my community, my HIV family...I have a zero-tolerance policy. For more information, log on to: www.livingpos.com. Follow her on Twiter @Cricketlv. FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

by Ruby Comer

Ruby Comer: Cecilia, what a treat to meet you! I…am…such a fan! Your performance on Velvet leaves me spellbound. Cecilia Freire: Oh, Ruby, thank you. That’s very sweet. I’m honored to do this for such a wonderful publication. You do good work. Gracias, Cecilia. Say, how many awards have

you won playing Rita? None. I know it’s going to sound cheesy, but really the best award is getting inside people’s hearts. Well, you got into mine, Missy! Before we go further, what’s the proper way to pronounce your last name? Is it Free-air? It would be great if my surname was pronounced in such a poetic way as “free air,” but unfortunately it’s more like “freir-a.” Okay, let’s fantasize a minute! How do you think Rita would have reacted and responded to the epidemic if it had occurred during her life? Rita would have had lots of gay friends! She’s never judgmental and so generous that she always chooses to put others before herself. I’m one hundred-percent sure that she would have lent a hand if needed.

frog. I grew up in the city so having contact with some animals makes me really nervous.

That’s completely my take on it too. What do you have in common with Rita and how are you different? Well, I’m very loyal and I always try to speak from my heart. Though sometimes not thinking about it first brings me some bad consequences. [She pauses.] I’m very different because I’m more “girly” and sometimes even posh. I guess I care more about my looks than Rita does. But for heaven’s sake, I’m an actress! [She rattles off a few chuckles with a flippant cockiness.]

I can understand, yes. When I say AIDS, what calls to mind? The Normal Heart, the HBO TV movie. I was very moved.

Were there any challenges that you encountered by bringing Rita to life? I remember being awfully scared in two scenes when I had to handle a mouse and a

What a tender memory, Cecilia…. [She asserts with gravitas]...I have to say Ruby, as you well know, the epidemic was not handled properly. There wasn’t

A super film indeed. How has the epidemic affected you? I was a kid in the eighties, so I didn’t understand what was going on. Later on, a family friend died. I remember even in his last hours he shared a big smile with all of us.

A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

Ruby illustration by Davidd Batalon; photo by Antonio Terrón

admit it. I’m an addict. I’m obsessed with the Spanish series Velvet—the story of a Madrid haute couture store in the fifties and sixties. Imagine the American series Mad Men, only with hemlines. You can stream it on Netflix, darlings. I’m particularly mad about Rita, an effervescent plain-Jane who heads the sewing department. When she’s exasperated with life, her signature response is, “Ay Dios mio…!” Rita is fastidious, kooky, and always ready to put her own needs on hold to help someone else, even when she’s hungry for someone to love her. She could be a Pedro Almodóvar heroine on a caffeine-rush. I suspected that the actor who portrays Rita was also a “giving” person. My Euro contacts put Miss Ruby in touch with the actor who portrays “Ree-ta”—as the Spanish say it, with a trilling of the “R.” Cecilia Freire is a celebrated Spanish actor, sort of a Jennifer Aniston type. She studied drama in London and New York, and her CV includes stage, film, and television work. In fact, she starred for four years in a popular TV series called Physical or Chemical, which followed the lives of high school students dealing with sex and drugs. The series ended in 2011. The thespian’s favorite film is Tootsie and her choice role would have been Bette Davis’s character in All About Eve. Next month, the award-winning Cecilia performs a theater project in Madrid’s Maria Guerrero Theatre. Cecilia just wrapped filming season three of Velvet—I can’t wait! She’s in her Madrid home and I’m in my little Silver Lake hovel in Los Angeles and we both hop on Skype.

CECILIA FREIRE

Brian had his HIV under control with medication. But smoking with HIV caused him to have serious health problems, including a stroke, a blood clot in his lungs and surgery on an artery in his neck. Smoking makes living with HIV much worse. You can quit.

CALL 1-800-QUIT-NOW.

#CDCTips

HIV alone didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t cause the clogged artery in my neck. Smoking with HIV did. Brian, age 45, California

much information available, the government was very clumsy in confronting it and then they didn’t take immediate action. They simplified it, not wanting to address it. [She lets out a profound sigh.] It’s so embarrassing and horrible how awkwardly they handled the disease. [All of a sudden she cracks a smile.] I’m glad though, how step-by-step the [response to the] epidemic has been evolving. Now we’re able to speak about it openly most of the time and can prevent it. Day by day science is discovering how to live a better life with the illness.

scream. [She laughs.] Oh, you’re a hoot, girl. Last time I was in your grand city I visited Apoyo Positivo. They provide home assistance, day centers, and psychological support for those afflicted with HIV and AIDS. [She nods eagerly in agreement.] Have you been involved with any AIDS fundraising? I haven’t been directly involved. I’ve collaborated for years with a small NGO that helps the schooling of young girls in India. It’s called Amigos de Odisha. [The non-profit organization was established

especially how women suffer injustices that are inexcusable in the twenty-first century. I needed to do something about it so I started supporting a little girl through the organization, giving her the chance to have an education. She now has a better future. This is one of the most rewarding things I have done, Ruby. [Her smoky coal-blue eyes glisten.] Please give me the website for my readers, Cecilia. It’s www.amigosdeodisha.org.Thank you. Though the website is only in Spanish, there are people there who speak English. One of my dreams, Ruby, is to go there and directly lend a hand. See, I had an inkling that you and Rita were similar in your humanitarian ways! I just have to know: what was it like kissing Adrián Lastra who plays Pedro? He is so scrumptious! Kissing Adrián and getting paid for it is…unbelievable. Touching his amazing biceps…[she spins her eyes], I just can’t stop talking about it!

Tell me, what celebrity stands out the most for you who died of AIDS? I think my first remembrance was Freddie Mercury’s death. That awakened in me so many questions. He was so talented. It was so unfair that he had to leave us so young. Ahh, Queen. I went to one of their concerts in the day. Freddie was such a magnetic performer, struck down in his prime. I heard through the grapevine that you used to be a singer? [Her head tilts back, her mouth gapes open, and a shocked pain sweeps across her face.] I assure you it’s better that I never sing. Ever! Yes, once I did have a punk rock band, but all I had to do was...

Ouch! Thanks for being part of Ruby’s Rap... [She interrupts.] Talking to you has encouraged me to get more active in the HIV community. I’d like to find out more about UNAIDS here in Madrid.

in Zaragoza, Spain, in 1999, and Odisha is a State in India. Its mission is to not only provide education to those less privileged, but to maintain centers and programs for women of all ages, and incorporating projects that improve their socio-economical status.] Being that only a few people are involved with the organization, it enables me to have direct contact with the activities they develop.

Oh, I have friends there! I’ll connect you. No worries, girl. Well, it’s been too short and certainly sweet Rita— oops—I mean, Cecilia. [We both smile in earnest.] Gracias tambien, Ruby. Adiós mi amiga!

What inspired you to get involved? It started with a trip I took to India. I experienced firsthand how people there are abandoned by the system, and

Ruby Comer is an independent journalist from the Midwest who is happy to call Hollywood her home away from home. Reach her by e-mail at MsRubyComer@aol.com.

For more information on Amigos de Odisha e-mail them at: info@amigosdeodisha.org.

A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

photos by Manuel Fernández-Valdés/Bambú Producciones/Atresmedia

When you were coming of age in the mid-nineties, efficacious drugs became available to those who were infected. Were you taught about STIs in school? At my school sex wasn’t spoken about in any way. [She halts for effect, nodding her head.] Shameful....

Velvet touch: Rita with shopmate Ana (top); another perplexing moment for Rita (right)

Before we Skype-out, I’m dying to know a Velvet backstory. In the second chapter of the first season, Pedro and I had to do a little dance. Adrián lifted me up and hit my head on a lamp. It’s not cute; it’s funny!

Justin B. Terry-Smith, MPH, has been fighting the good fight since 1999. He’s garnered recognition and awards for his work, but he’s more concerned about looking for new ways to transform society for the better than resting on his laurels. He started up in gay rights and HIV activism in 2005, published an HIV-themed children’s book, I Have A Secret (Creative House Press) in 2011, and created his own award-winning video blog called, “Justin’s HIV Journal”: justinshivjournal. blogspot.com. Presently, he is working toward his doctorate in public health. Visit his main Web site at www.justinbsmith.com. He welcomes your questions at jsmithco98@hotmail.com.

Justin— We have been friends (on Facebook) for a while and we met [as fellow members of ] the leather community when you were Mr. Maryland Leather 2010. However, I would appreciate it if you keep my identity secret, seeing as how we are both well known in the leather community as well. Well, I noticed that there is a spike in syphilis cases among gay men, especially in the leather community. Do you think that has anything to do with pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP)? My next question is about post-exposure prophylaxis (PEP). In your opinion do you think that PEP gives people permission to have sex with others and then go get the pill the next morning? —Old Guard Leather DADDY Thank you for writing me and forgive me for responding a little late. Since Mid-Atlantic Leather Weekend just happened, I’ve decided to use your e-mail as the one that I want to showcase for this column. Recently, there have been surges of not only syphilis but other sexually transmitted infections (STIs) in the United States. According to the CDC (2015), in 2014 there was about 20,000 cases of syphilis that were reported. That was the highest rate since 1994 and a fifteen-percent increase over 2013. The CDC FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

stated that 458 cases of syphilis in newborn babies; this has been about a 27.5 percent increase since 2013. There were also a reported 350,000 cases of gonorrhea, which is a five-percent increase since 2013. The CDC is also saying that researchers have found that those individuals who are taking PrEP for HIV prevention did not contract HIV; however some did contract gonorrhea and syphilis. I should also note that some researchers are saying that syphilis is being better reported and that is why the number of infections is so high. I do not think we should stigmatize people because they choose to use PrEP or PEP. Let me first describe to my readers what PEP is and then what PrEP is. PEP is an anti-HIV drug that should be taken as soon as someone thinks they have been exposed to HIV. PEP is only effective if taken within seventy-two hours of exposure to HIV and it must be taken for twenty-eight days. It consists of two to three antiretroviral medications. It’s not a simple regimen as you make it seem—it’s not one pill the next morning. PrEP is a once-a-day medication taken specifically to prevent HIV, which is ninety-two-percent effective. Neither PrEP nor PEP are 100-percent effective in preventing HIV infection between humans. PrEP and PEP are both preventative measures that we need to make sure that the general population

know about, including when and how to use them. Also let me say this that there is no study that says that there is an increase of syphilis in the leather community. But let me say this: The early AIDS epidemic started right at the beginning of the sexual revolution for the gay community. People do not understand that that is one of the reasons why our community has such a big problem with HIV/AIDS. We were asked to suddenly adapt our freedom to a new situation and we were also increasingly stigmatized. We had to fight for our lives. Former President Ronald Reagan didn’t even say the word “AIDS” in a public speech until thousands of people had already died. Also being gay in the eighties wasn’t easy because we were so looked down upon; nobody gave a flying fuck about our community, except us and our allies. We went through years and years of burying friends every week. I was born in 1979 so I never did see the tragedy of the early AIDS epidemic, but my friends, especially my friends who are gay and men who have sex with men of color, are still dying. I would like to pose a question to my readers if they wouldn’t mind sharing their opinion. With the rise of PrEP and PEP do you think that the gay community has the ability to relive their sexual revolution or has the gay community already been there done that? ◊

BENEFITING

A&U • OCTOBER 2015

Love & the Whole Truth two halves make a whole, two wholes make a relationship

illustration by Timothy J. Haines

can honestly say that I have never been in love before. Don’t get me wrong, I have been in a lot of “lust” situations and I have definitely been in a lot of “like” situations, but “love,” I can’t quite say that I have been there. On this journey of walking in my truth, I was able to realize that for many years I was dating without really having all my shit together. I don’t mean surface level items, either. I mean really having a full understanding of who I was and whether I was truly happy with the person I was becoming. I lived under this belief that I was always looking for my “better” half. It really wasn’t until recently that I figured out just how disrespectful and flawed that statement is. Hear me out. To say that someone is a half gives the connotation that they are missing something. To say I am looking for my “better” half even furthers this belief that, even in the relationship, I am less than my partner and that there are certain areas of your life that are void and need to be filled. When you really think about it this way, it kinda hurts. The worst thing about that statement is that it pushes this narrative that me being my best only means that I am at fifty percent. Imma say that again. I. Me. Myself. Even when I have all my shit together, I am only half of the person I truly can be. This would mean that people who remain single, never reach their full potential in life. This would also mean that people who are in non-monogamous types of relationships are all kinds of crazy percentages of their full selves. Let me be clear. For February, the month that is the home to Valentine’s Day, I want single people and even those in relationships to work on being “whole.” This year, I want people FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

to do what makes them happy. If you are unhappy about body image, go to the gym on this day. If you always wanted to get a tattoo but worried about what others may think, get a tattoo. Buy yourself some flowers. Take yourself out to eat dinner. Show yourself some love because you are wonderfully created and beautifully designed and that deserves some selfishness! For me being whole isn’t just as simple as having my finances in order. Having a car, a job, a place is all surface level.

Having my shit together includes affirmation in myself of who I was, who I am, and who I will become. I now live my life working on filling my own voids on my own. If I am unhappy with body image, I am not looking for someone else to accept it before I am willing to accept it myself. If I have voids in certain areas of my life, it is my duty to fill those voids. It should never be someone else’s duty to fill voided areas in my life. Love starts at home. Love starts from within. It used to be that person who was upset about my “love life” never realizing that I was never in love with me. How could I expect someone else to love my flaws and all when I hadn’t fully come to terms with them myself? Even when we talk about HIV and

serodiscordant relationships we must be certain that we are affirming that having the virus does not make you less of a person. Having HIV is a just a small part of the entire person that you are. Being HIV-positive should not be a detriment to the dating pool. With advancements in treatment and the introduction of PrEP into the market, it is my hope that many of the stigmas around dating and loving a person who is HIV-positive will soon fade away. People who are living with HIV should not have to live with the fear of being alone. People who are black and gay should no longer think that they are not worthy enough to find love. I also want to point out the fact that love may not be in the cards for everyone and that is OKAY! Being single for the rest of your life does not have to be looked upon as some type of failure. Nurture the relationships you already have rather than being depressed about the ones you long to be in. Mathematically, all of us in the dating pool will not get married. All of us will not find a lifelong partner. To live under this belief is a disservice to yourself. Know that you are enough for you and that as long as you love yourself, nothing else should even matter. I conclude this by saying I will no longer chase my other “half.” I will do things that make me happy and make me whole. This in turn will show who I truly am. This is what I want the world to see. This is what I want my other “whole” to be attracted too. Happy Valentine’s Day all. Let’s do the work on finding our other wholes. George M. Johnson is an HIV advocate who works for Us Helping Us, People into Living located in Washington, D.C. He has written for Pride.com, Musedmagonline.com, Blavity.com, Rolereboot.org, and Ebony.com. Follow him on Twitter @IamGMJohnson.

COMPLERA is a prescription medicine for adults who have never taken HIV-1 medicines before and who have no more than 100,000 copies/mL of virus in their blood. COMPLERA can also replace current HIV-1 medicines for some adults who have an undetectable viral load (less than 50 copies/mL) and whose healthcare provider determines that they meet certain other requirements. COMPLERA combines 3 medicines into 1 pill to be taken once a day with food. COMPLERA should not be used with other HIV-1 medicines.

Just the

one

for me

COMPLERA is a complete HIV-1 treatment that combines the medicines in TRUVADA + EDURANT in only 1 pill a day.*

Ask your healthcare provider if COMPLERA may be the one for you. *COMPLERA is a combination of the medicines in TRUVADA (emtricitabine and tenofovir disoproxil fumarate) and EDURANT (rilpivirine).

Pill shown is not actual size.

COMPLERA does not cure HIV-1 infection or AIDS.

To control HIV-1 infection and decrease HIV-related illnesses you must keep taking COMPLERA. Ask your healthcare provider if you have questions about how to reduce the risk of passing HIV-1 to others. Always practice safer sex and use condoms to lower the chance of sexual contact with body fluids. Never reuse or share needles or other items that have body fluids on them. It is not known if COMPLERA is safe and effective in children under 18 years old.

IMPORTANT SAFETY INFORMATION What is the most important information I should know about COMPLERA?

COMPLERA can cause serious side effects: t Build-up of an acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which is a serious medical emergency. Symptoms of lactic acidosis include feeling very weak or tired, unusual (not normal) muscle pain, trouble breathing, stomach pain with nausea or vomiting, feeling cold especially in your arms and legs, feeling dizzy or lightheaded, and/or a fast or irregular heartbeat. t Serious liver problems. The liver may become large (hepatomegaly) and fatty (steatosis). Symptoms of liver problems include your skin or the white part of your eyes turns yellow (jaundice), dark “tea-colored” urine, light-colored bowel movements (stools), loss of appetite for several days or longer, nausea, and/or stomach pain. t You may be more likely to get lactic acidosis or serious liver problems if you are female, very overweight (obese), or have been taking COMPLERA for a long time. In some cases, these serious conditions have led to death. Call your healthcare provider right away if you have any symptoms of these conditions. t Worsening of hepatitis B (HBV) infection. If you also have HBV and stop taking COMPLERA, your hepatitis may suddenly get worse. Do not stop taking COMPLERA without first talking to your healthcare provider, as they will need to monitor your health. COMPLERA is not approved for the treatment of HBV.

Who should not take COMPLERA?

Do not take COMPLERA if you: t Take a medicine that contains: adefovir (Hepsera), lamivudine (Epivir-HBV), carbamazepine (Carbatrol, Equetro, Tegretol, TegretolXR, Teril, Epitol), oxcarbazepine (Trileptal), phenobarbital (Luminal), phenytoin (Dilantin, Dilantin-125, Phenytek), rifampin (Rifater, Rifamate, Rimactane, Rifadin), rifapentine (Priftin), dexlansoprazole (Dexilant), esomeprazole (Nexium, Vimovo), lansoprazole (Prevacid), omeprazole (Prilosec, Zegerid), pantoprazole sodium (Protonix), rabeprazole (Aciphex), more than 1 dose of the steroid medicine dexamethasone or dexamethasone sodium phosphate, or the herbal supplement St. John’s wort. t Take any other medicines to treat HIV-1 infection, unless recommended by your healthcare provider.

What are the other possible side effects of COMPLERA?

Serious side effects of COMPLERA may also include: t Severe skin rash and allergic reactions. Call your doctor right away if you get a rash. Some rashes and allergic reactions may need to be treated in a hospital. Stop taking COMPLERA and get medical help right away if you get a rash with any of the following symptoms: severe allergic reactions causing a swollen face, lips, mouth, tongue or throat which may lead to difficulty swallowing or breathing; mouth sores or blisters on your body; inflamed eye (conjunctivitis); fever, dark urine or pain on the right side of the stomach-area (abdominal pain). t New or worse kidney problems, including kidney failure. Your healthcare provider should do blood tests to check your kidneys before starting treatment with COMPLERA. If you have had kidney problems, or take other medicines that may cause kidney problems, your healthcare provider may also check your kidneys during treatment with COMPLERA.

Depression or mood changes. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you have any of the following symptoms: feeling sad or hopeless, feeling anxious or restless, have thoughts of hurting yourself (suicide) or have tried to hurt yourself. t Changes in liver enzymes: People who have had hepatitis B or C, or who have had changes in their liver function tests in the past may have an increased risk for liver problems while taking COMPLERA. Some people without prior liver disease may also be at risk. Your healthcare provider may do tests to check your liver enzymes before and during treatment with COMPLERA. t Bone problems, including bone pain or bones getting soft or thin, which may lead to fractures. Your healthcare provider may do tests to check your bones. t Changes in body fat can happen in people taking HIV-1 medicines. t Changes in your immune system. Your immune system may get stronger and begin to fight infections. Tell your healthcare provider if you have any new symptoms after you start taking COMPLERA. t

The most common side effects of COMPLERA include trouble sleeping (insomnia), abnormal dreams, headache, dizziness, diarrhea, nausea, rash, tiredness, and depression. Other common side effects include vomiting, stomach pain or discomfort, skin discoloration (small spots or freckles), and pain. Tell your healthcare provider if you have any side effects that bother you or do not go away.

What should I tell my healthcare provider before taking COMPLERA?

All your health problems. Be sure to tell your healthcare provider if you have or had any kidney, mental health, bone, or liver problems, including hepatitis virus infection. t All the medicines you take, including prescription and nonprescription medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements. COMPLERA may affect the way other medicines work, and other medicines may affect how COMPLERA works. Keep a list of all your medicines and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist. Do not start any new medicines while taking COMPLERA without first talking with your healthcare provider. t If you take rifabutin (Mycobutin). Talk to your healthcare provider about the right amount of rilpivirine (Edurant) you should take. t If you take antacids. Take antacids at least 2 hours before or at least 4 hours after you take COMPLERA. t If you take stomach acid blockers. Take acid blockers at least 12 hours before or at least 4 hours after you take COMPLERA. Ask your healthcare provider if your acid blocker is okay to take, as some acid blockers should never be taken with COMPLERA. t If you are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if COMPLERA can harm your unborn baby. Tell your healthcare provider if you become pregnant while taking COMPLERA. t If you are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do not breastfeed. HIV-1 can be passed to the baby in breast milk. Also, some medicines in COMPLERA can pass into breast milk, and it is not known if this can harm the baby. t

You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit www.fda.gov/medwatch, or call 1-800-FDA-1088. Please see Brief Summary of full Prescribing Information with important warnings on the following pages.

Brief Summary of full Prescribing Information COMPLERA® (kom-PLEH-rah) (emtricitabine 200 mg, rilpivirine 25 mg, tenofovir disoproxil fumarate 300 mg) tablets Brief summary of full Prescribing Information. For more information, please see the full Prescribing Information, including Patient Information. What is COMPLERA? COMPLERA is a prescription medicine used as a complete HIV-1 treatment in one pill a day. COMPLERA is for adults who have never taken HIV-1 medicines before and who have no more than 100,000 copies/mL of virus in their blood (this is called ‘viral load’). Complera can also replace current HIV-1 medicines for some adults who have an undetectable viral load (less than 50 copies/mL) and whose healthcare provider determines that they meet certain other requirements. COMPLERA is a complete HIV-1 medicine and should not be used with any other HIV-1 medicines. COMPLERA should always be taken with food. A protein drink does not replace food. COMPLERA does not cure HIV-1 or AIDS. You must stay on continuous HIV-1 therapy to control HIV-1 infection and decrease HIV-related illnesses. Ask your healthcare provider about how to prevent passing HIV-1 to others. Do not share or reuse needles, injection equipment, or personal items that can have blood or body fluids on them. Do not have sex without protection. Always practice safer sex by using a latex or polyurethane condom to lower the chance of sexual contact with semen, vaginal secretions, or blood. What is the most important information I should know about COMPLERA? COMPLERA can cause serious side effects, including: Build-up of an acid in your blood (lactic acidosis). Lactic acidosis can happen in some people who take COMPLERA or similar (nucleoside analogs) medicines. Lactic acidosis is a serious medical emergency that can lead to death. Lactic acidosis can be hard to identify early, because the symptoms could seem like symptoms of other health problems. Call your healthcare provider right away if you get any of the following symptoms which could be signs of lactic acidosis: – feel very weak or tired – have unusual (not normal) muscle pain – have trouble breathing – having stomach pain with nausea or vomiting – feel cold, especially in your arms and legs – feel dizzy or lightheaded – have a fast or irregular heartbeat Severe liver problems. Severe liver problems can happen in people who take COMPLERA. In some cases, these liver problems can lead to death. Your liver may become large (hepatomegaly) and you may develop fat in your liver (steatosis). Call your healthcare provider right away if you get any of the following symptoms of liver problems: – your skin or the white part of your eyes turns yellow (jaundice) – dark “tea-colored” urine – light-colored bowel movements (stools) – loss of appetite for several days or longer – nausea – stomach pain You may be more likely to get lactic acidosis or severe liver problems if you are female, very overweight (obese), or have been taking COMPLERA for a long time.

Worsening of Hepatitis B infection. If you have hepatitis B virus (HBV) infection and take COMPLERA, your HBV may get worse (flare-up) if you stop taking COMPLERA. A “flare-up” is when your HBV infection suddenly returns in a worse way than before. COMPLERA is not approved for the treatment of HBV, so you must discuss your HBV with your healthcare provider. – Do not run out of COMPLERA. Refill your prescription or talk to your healthcare provider before your COMPLERA is all gone. – Do not stop taking COMPLERA without first talking to your healthcare provider. – If you stop taking COMPLERA, your healthcare provider will need to check your health often and do blood tests regularly to check your HBV infection. Tell your healthcare provider about any new or unusual symptoms you may have after you stop taking COMPLERA. Who should not take COMPLERA? Do not take COMPLERA if you also take any of the following medicines: Medicines used for seizures: carbamazepine (Carbatrol, Equetro, Tegretol, Tegretol-XR, Teril, Epitol); oxcarbazepine (Trileptal); phenobarbital (Luminal); phenytoin (Dilantin, Dilantin-125, Phenytek) Medicines used for tuberculosis: rifampin (Rifater, Rifamate, Rimactane, Rifadin); rifapentine (Priftin) Certain medicines used to block stomach acid called proton pump inhibitors (PPIs): dexlansoprazole (Dexilant); esomeprazole (Nexium, Vimovo); lansoprazole (Prevacid); omeprazole (Prilosec, Zegerid); pantoprazole sodium (Protonix); rabeprazole (Aciphex) Certain steroid medicines: More than 1 dose of dexamethasone or dexamethasone sodium phosphate Certain herbal supplements: St. John’s wort Certain hepatitis medicines: adefovir (Hepsera), lamivudine (Epivir-HBV) Do not take COMPLERA if you also take any other HIV-1 medicines, including: Other medicines that contain emtricitabine or tenofovir (ATRIPLA, EMTRIVA, STRIBILD, TRUVADA, VIREAD) Other medicines that contain lamivudine (Combivir, Epivir, Epzicom, Triumeq, Trizivir) rilpivirine (Edurant), unless you are also taking rifabutin (Mycobutin) COMPLERA is not for use in people who are less than 18 years old. What are the possible side effects of COMPLERA? COMPLERA may cause the following serious side effects: See “What is the most important information I should know about COMPLERA?” Severe skin rash and allergic reactions. Skin rash is a common side effect of COMPLERA but it can also be serious. Call your doctor right away if you get a rash. In some cases, rash and allergic reaction may need to be treated in a hospital. Stop taking COMPLERA and call your doctor or get medical help right away if you get a rash with any of the following symptoms: – severe allergic reactions causing a swollen face, lips, mouth, tongue or throat, which may cause difficulty swallowing or breathing – mouth sores or blisters on your body – inflamed eye (conjunctivitis) – fever, dark urine or pain on the right side of the stomach-area (abdominal pain) New or worse kidney problems, including kidney failure. Your healthcare provider should do blood and urine tests to check your kidneys before you start and while you are taking COMPLERA. If you have had kidney problems in the past or need to take another medicine that can cause kidney problems, your healthcare provider may need to do blood tests to check your kidneys during your treatment with COMPLERA.

Depression or mood changes. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you have any of the following symptoms: – feeling sad or hopeless – feeling anxious or restless – have thoughts of hurting yourself (suicide) or have tried to hurt yourself Change in liver enzymes. People with a history of hepatitis B or C virus infection or who have certain liver enzyme changes may have an increased risk of developing new or worsening liver problems during treatment with COMPLERA. Liver problems can also happen during treatment with COMPLERA in people without a history of liver disease. Your healthcare provider may need to do tests to check your liver enzymes before and during treatment with COMPLERA. Bone problems can happen in some people who take COMPLERA. Bone problems include bone pain, softening or thinning (which may lead to fractures). Your healthcare provider may need to do tests to check your bones. Changes in body fat can happen in people taking HIV-1 medicine. These changes may include increased amount of fat in the upper back and neck (“buffalo hump”), breast, and around the main part of your body (trunk). Loss of fat from the legs, arms and face may also happen. The cause and long term health effect of these conditions are not known. Changes in your immune system (Immune Reconstitution Syndrome) can happen when you start taking HIV-1 medicines. Your immune system may get stronger and begin to fight infections that have been hidden in your body for a long time. Tell your healthcare provider if you start having any new symptoms after starting your HIV-1 medicine. The most common side effects of COMPLERA include: Trouble sleeping (insomnia), abnormal dreams, headache, dizziness, diarrhea, nausea, rash, tiredness, depression Additional common side effects include: Vomiting, stomach pain or discomfort, skin discoloration (small spots or freckles), pain Tell your healthcare provider if you have any side effect that bothers you or that does not go away. These are not all the possible side effects of COMPLERA. For more information, ask your healthcare provider. Call your doctor for medical advice about side effects. You may report side effects to FDA at 1-800-FDA-1088. What should I tell my healthcare provider before taking COMPLERA? Tell your healthcare provider about all your medical conditions, including: If you have or had any kidney, mental health, bone, or liver problems, including hepatitis B or C infection. If you are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if COMPLERA can harm your unborn child. – There is a pregnancy registry for women who take antiviral medicines during pregnancy. The purpose of this registry is to collect information about the health of you and your baby. Talk to your healthcare provider about how you can take part in this registry. If you are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do not breastfeed if you take COMPLERA. – You should not breastfeed if you have HIV-1 because of the risk of passing HIV-1 to your baby. – Two of the medicines in COMPLERA can pass to your baby in your breast milk. It is not known if this could harm your baby. – Talk to your healthcare provider about the best way to feed your baby.

Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take, including prescription and over-the-counter medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements: COMPLERA may affect the way other medicines work, and other medicines may affect how COMPLERA works. If you take certain medicines with COMPLERA, the amount of COMPLERA in your body may be too low and it may not work to help control your HIV-1 infection. The HIV-1 virus in your body may become resistant to COMPLERA or other HIV-1 medicines that are like it. Be sure to tell your healthcare provider if you take any of the following medicines: – Rifabutin (Mycobutin), a medicine to treat some bacterial infections. Talk to your healthcare provider about the right amount of rilpivirine (Edurant) you should take. – Antacid medicines that contain aluminum, magnesium hydroxide, or calcium carbonate. Take antacids at least 2 hours before or at least 4 hours after you take COMPLERA. – Certain medicines to block the acid in your stomach, including cimetidine (Tagamet), famotidine (Pepcid), nizatidine (Axid), or ranitidine hydrochloride (Zantac). Take the acid blocker at least 12 hours before or at least 4 hours after you take COMPLERA. Some acid blocking medicines should never be taken with COMPLERA (see “Who should not take COMPLERA?” for a list of these medicines). – Medicines that can affect how your kidneys work, including acyclovir (Zovirax), cidofovir (Vistide), ganciclovir (Cytovene IV, Vitrasert), valacyclovir (Valtrex), and valganciclovir (Valcyte). – clarithromycin (Biaxin) – erythromycin (E-Mycin, Eryc, Ery-Tab, PCE, Pediazole, Ilosone) – fluconazole (Diflucan) – itraconazole (Sporanox) – ketoconazole (Nizoral) – methadone (Dolophine) – posaconazole (Noxafil) – telithromycin (Ketek) – voriconazole (Vfend) Know the medicines you take. Keep a list of all your medicines and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist when you get a new medicine. Do not start any new medicines while you are taking COMPLERA without first talking with your healthcare provider. Keep COMPLERA and all medicines out of reach of children. This Brief Summary summarizes the most important information about COMPLERA. If you would like more information, talk with your healthcare provider. You can also ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist for information about COMPLERA that is written for health professionals, or call 1-800-445-3235 or go to www.COMPLERA.com. Revised: May 2015

COMPLERA, the COMPLERA Logo, EMTRIVA, GILEAD, the GILEAD Logo, GSI, HEPSERA, STRIBILD, TRUVADA, VIREAD, and VISTIDE are trademarks of Gilead Sciences, Inc., or its related companies. ATRIPLA is a trademark of Bristol-Myers Squibb & Gilead Sciences, LLC. All other marks referenced herein are the property of their respective owners.

lifeguide

s an Ambassador for Greater Than AIDS and one of the women who is part of its very important campaign, Empowered: Women, HIV & Intimate Partner Violence, I am here to be one of the voices of so many of us women who are going through this or went through this type of abuse, like myself. Statistics show that one in three women experiences intimate partner violence. For women with HIV, it is one in two. Intimate partner violence, including physical violence, emotional abuse and/or controlling behavior, is a major issue for many women in the U.S. Less often discussed is the concerning connection with HIV. I realized a long time ago that the trauma that I endured as a child, the sexual abuse as an infant, and mental and spiritual abuse I saw growing up by the man who was supposed to protect me, my father, was a predictor of future relationships and what I felt was normal to me: VIOLENCE, SELF-HATE, ABUSE and FEELING UNWORTHY. It took many years for me to understand that I am deserving! That I am worthy of love and respect! But I had to love myself first. We women who have experienced trauma and have endured abuse are more likely to contract HIV. Trauma and HIV goes hand in hand. From my own experience, I tell women and men that it is ok to seek help! That all of us are worthy of all the good things that we deserve! That we have to break the cycle. I found myself in relationships that imitated my mother and father’s relationship and thought it was ok for someone to hurt me, and it just made me feel how I always felt as a child, unwanted, unloved, and, if you put HIV in the mix, the abuse can get worse. Many women and men feel dirty and shame living with HIV and they feel that they will never find love—and abusers pick up on that! I had one partner who even told me that if I left them, no one would want me because I was living with HIV! HIV is used as a tool against us to abuse us. But we have to understand that HIV

Mejia-Laing

take action to break patterns of abuse

is nothing to be ashamed of and no one is less than anyone else just because of the virus. I am a twenty-seven-year survivor and forty-two years-old..it has taken me a long process to believe that. Healing is part of the process and I am still in that process. I do not have all my shit together and I still cry..which is ok! Many do not know this. I have a loving wife, Lisa Laing-Mejia, of nine years, yet our first year was very violent..me towards

her and her towards me. This is what was expected and normal for me. I was abused as I child and, even though I was in those violent relationships, I became violent myself and would fight back. It was a vicious cycle. We had to sit down and say, we can’t continue to go on like this....If we want to make it, we have to stop abusing each other and so we broke the cycle. So to anyone out there that is going through this...do not beat yourself up! This is something that in most cultures is not talked about. We have to start-up the conversation! Please get help. I am The Well Project’s Global Ambassador and CAB member; we focus on women and girls from all over the globe living with HIV or affected by it. This is a wonderful place for us women to empower each other, just like the campaign that I am in. We have resources and a sisterhood like no other. We are here to uplift each other in a world where many of us are dealing with depression, anxiety, and survivor’s guilt, like myself! We have

become very sociable on social media, but we are losing human contact. I know many of us isolate, especially when we are going through these situations, but we have to break this pattern—this is exactly what an abuser wants. So find support off-line, too. This past year, 2015, was one of the hardest years of my life. I basically broke into pieces. I realized I was just glued together and, even though I am in a healthy relationship, the demons of my past returned, and lurking in my brain, at times my own worst enemy, were those feelings I have of worthlessness and depression. This is when my real healing started! I realized that my biggest battle is with my own mind! I will continue to heal my mind, body and soul and I hope you all do the same. And always remember these words from a wise friend and sister, Diana Aguiar, who shared this quote: “I have permission to rest. I’m not responsible for fixing everything that’s broken. I don’t have to try to make everyone happy. For now, I take time for me. It’s time to replenish and that is what I will always do. I come first.” For more information and to seek help and support, log on to: www.greaterthan.org/ campaigns/empowered/empoweredwomen-hiv-intimate-partner-violence-about/; www.thewellproject.org. Domestic Abuse hotline: www.thehotline.org. An award-winning HIV activist, consultant and educator, Maria Mejia-Laing is the co-author of the book From a Warrior’s Passion and Pain, a real-life account of her twenty-seven-year battle with HIV. She is currently the co-chair of the Women and Minorities Outreach for the Dab the AIDS Bear Project. Maria is a part of the CDC campaign “Let’s Stop HIV Together,” and an ambassador for the The Stigma Project. She is an advisor for Janssen’s campaign Your Story, Your HIV Wisdom and is also an Ambassador for Greater than AIDS and its campaign Empowered: Women, HIV & IPV. Maria lives with her wife Lisa in Miami, Florida. She continues to build support, educate, and encourage testing and healthcare in a city with one of the highest new HIV infection rates in the country. A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

illustration by Timothy J. Haines

by Maria

Words of Empowerment

What the Brightest Minds Say

’m in the hospital again. I say again, because I am always in the hospital. Well not always, but often enough. I’ve had hip surgery, breast reduction, umbilical hernias, and tons and tons of butt stuff. At this point it’s really no big deal. So I’m in the hospital again, this time it’s for something to do with the kidneys…. And I’m hooked up to an IV, and they have put iodine in my blood, and they are measuring something about my output every few hours; and I am dressed in one of those backwards flower-patterned blue robes—that is only half a robe—because your butt is always out….And I’m almost naked accept for the robe, my socks, and a pair of cute Andrew Christian underwear—because I ALWAYS wear cute underwear; especially if I know somehow someone may see my bottom. And plus, hospitals are the best place to find cute doctors to marry. And believe me I love to flirt with cute doctors! Mostly the slightly overweight, socially awkward ones, because that’s sort of my type (not that I have a type,) but also, they are the ones who tend to make the most eye contact. And the brightest minds say that connection is about contact. And they give me tons of bare eye-to-eye contact. Maybe I’m their type too. So me and this overweight mildly awkward doctor are shooting the Shih Tzu: chewing the fat and passing the time with light flirty conversation. And he is tired. There is something about him that seems worn down, totally inappropriate, and unguarded in a way that physicians rarely are. So the conversation is moving easily and freely; and I’m bragging about how good of a bottom I am; and he blushes, and laughs a deep warm heterosexual chuckle…pauses…and then looks me directly in my eyes and asks: “How good are you?” And it’s my turn to blush….All of the highest minds say that the brightest minds say that connection is about contact: eye contact, physical contact, and social con-

tact. You have to meet people at their level, and connect in some fundamental way. He and I had a dirty sense of humor; and we bonded over that. The nurses are coming in and out— checking things—and measuring things: Touching me on my arm, and shoulder, and forehead—and comforting pats just above the knee—all the while giving scald-

ing glances at the doctor. And the televisions is playing some morning talk show up in the corner; the way hospital televisions do—and the chunky, charming-eyed doctor is obviously just here to observe the research, because he hasn’t gotten out of his seat once since I’ve been here. And he isn’t paying the nurses’ criticism no mind; because he is tired, or distracted, or maybe something happened at home last night that shifted his personal priorities… but whatever the reason, he is more real than I have ever seen any man in a lab coat. And he and I are flirting, and making off-color jokes, and trying our hardest to make the other blush. And after an hour of this, I eventually build up the courage to ask him the one question that I really want to ask him, because when am I ever going to get a doctor that is this human again? Plus, he and I are friends now: We’ve already exchanged first names, and I’ve pulled down my cute Andrew Christian underwear to show him the hip surgery scar across my right butt

cheek—and he’s told me that “your ass looks great, it’s almost like it’s never been touched.” And I’ve fired back, “Oh it’s been touched; it’s been touched plenty!” Both of us are blushing and making eye contact, and looking away, and making eye contact again. All of the brightest minds that research the highest minds say that the brightest minds need contact to build connection: eye contact for trust, physical contact for love, social contact for community, and sexual contact for “all of the above.” So I ask him the question that I’ve been wanting to ask, “What’s the deal with condoms? Are people really using them? I don’t know anyone who actually uses the things; but that is all you doctors talk about.” He winces, and shakes his shaggy head; looks to see if there are any nurses around, and says, “It’s my experience that none of my clients are using them either. Barebacking is pretty much ubiquitous among the men that I see. And I get it. I don’t use them myself. I get it.” He says again, “But luckily the conversations are changing right? It’s not all we talk about any more. Well, it’s not all I talk about….” So much of the human condition is about connecting with other human beings; and in order to connect we need contact. And luckily we have found hundreds of hundreds of ways to connect—and to protect ourselves from those connections—but the brightest and highest minds still say that a human being cannot survive without skin to skin contact. Corey Saucier is an artist and writer living in Los Angeles. He is a Lambda Literary Fellow in Fiction and Non-Fiction and is currently penning his first novel. His musings and wanderings on Love, Life, and Nonsense can be found at www. justwords.tumblr.com. A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

illustration by Timothy J. Haines

one man searches for straightforward answers to an ever-changing conversation

nonfiction

Love Wins

resident Obama was on TV! It was June 26, 2015, and the president was making a speech about marriage and how it now represented marriage for all. My eyes watered. Not that I had ever thought marriage would be good for me— but I knew many other queer people had been dreaming and hoping to marry. It was time to celebrate. I was wearing my Lady-Gaga, fifteen-inch, come-fuck-me pumps, ready to dance into the night. San Francisco’s Pride celebration was two days later, and my friends Sean Lee and Lars Johnson came to visit. We watched the Pride Parade live on TV. Other friends dropped in throughout the day. Everyone in my circle of friends and family was much younger than myself, and I could tell these events touched me differently. I was sixty-five years-old, and had been living with HIV for over thirty-two years. I had survived, but all of my friends and boyfriends from my life before AIDS had passed away. Sean and Lars were thirty years-old. It hit me that new generations of gay people will reach adulthood at a very different place in the continuum of opportunities—one that took me fifty years to reach. The 2015 marriage decision represented a monumental leap forward for an old sissy like me. There were deep emotions, and I was at a loss for words. *

Come along with me for a brief journey…back to a time when most queer closets were closed and dark. It was 1974, and I was a naive gay man searching for a new sexual identity in the post-hippie/pre-yuppie/pre-pre-tech-nerd culture of the City by the Bay: San Francisco. In the 1970s, freedom rang in the air, and our city was a chrysalis bursting with flavor. Closets were opening for a select few. In the ’70s, I was the belle of the ball in the city of liberty’s shimmering cocoon. My queer peers and I discovered our identities and unleashed upon the world our magnificent, tarragon-tinged selves. No one thought of marriage back then. We planned our disco attire, recreational drugs, and visits to the baths. We were searching for our hearts’ desire. We shucked off the usual, ho-hum, salt-and-pepper trappings, and assumed eccentric, thyme-infused, Worcestershire-sauced delights. We became exotic, zingy creatures wearing paprika-sprinkled get-ups to express our new, savory selves. For gay men, there was no need to feel down, because we could always stay at the YMCA. San Francisco girly men merged into a community of individuals, each of us expressing our needs, desires, and cotton-candy dreams. We wrapped our hot bodies in skintight clothing, and donned slog boots for the manhunt. Large, vacant buildings became dick-pounding bathhouses and sex clubs. Old dive bars sprouted glittering wings, and we danced as if morning would never come. The party queens reigned over weekends wrapped in goosebumps, but this dream world encompassed only a few butternut-rum ZIP codes. We knew how our hand-blown bubble of existence ap-

by Tim Patten

peared to those in the outside world: a Sodom and Gomorrah dungeon of carnal hedonism. *

My city has often been characterized as a cesspit of sin and excess, but people today are somewhat more enlightened. Society’s reappraisal and acceptance of our community has been an amazing evolution to witness, but it didn’t really hit home for me until the day I learned that my ex-flatmate, Sean Lee, and Lars Johnson were engaged to be married. Yes, California—and all states—now allow same-sex marriage. Mm-hmm. Sean Lee and Lars Johnson: gay married! Well, it made sense—hell, yeah! Pop the champagne cork, sound the party horns, and throw on some Katy Perry. Much like the inauguration of the first black U.S. President, it was a day I never thought I’d live to see. Sensing my jubilation at hearing the news, Sean invited me to witness the ceremony at City Hall. Through a flood of joyful tears, I managed to choke out the words, “Yes! Mazel tov!” I was so happy that I wasn’t just gay—I was Jewish, too. My heart skipped a few beats as I looked back into the black hole of gay history and saw the proud streetwalker strides made within this short, disco-to-hip-hop span of my lifetime. In that moment, I realized how the millennial generation is reaping the benefits of the struggles of the generations preceding them. In my early years of frilly faggotry, I had never expected that the freedom I enjoyed within my tiny, insular community would extend to the general population. At three minutes to eleven on the morning of the happy occasion, I stood at the corner of Filbert and Kearney streets, awaiting my Municipal Railway trolley. As I nervously bit my lip and watched the sun beating back the morning fog, a J-car soundlessly wheeled up. Grinning widely, Sean and Lars welcomed me aboard. Lars’s family was already seated, a flurry of nervous hands and friendly anticipation: his mom, dad, two sisters, and young niece. As the trolley sauntered forth, I teetered about on three-inch heels. I was introduced as Todd, Sean’s “gay godmother.” Warm smiles were beamed, giggles rippled, and handshakes proffered as we rattled our way into the underground and headed downtown. All of a sudden, finding my gay self socially conjoined with the heteronormative made me feel self-conscious. I felt as if I were wearing the lilac dance gown Rita Moreno wore in West Side Story and singing “America” right next to the Brady Bunch. To be myself and respectful at the same time was a death-defying balancing act performed in spiked heels (the good thing about spiked heels is they keep you balanced—or you fall over). As soon as my adrenaline spiked and my girlish excitement took control, I was able to relax a little. During the trolley ride, I learned that Lars’s family was nothing but wonderful and understanding. They were genuinely pleased that he had found happiness with the man he loved. After the trolley ride, we walked the short distance to City A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

Hall and entered the awe-inspiring domed building. I was familiar with the immense, art-laden complex, as I had worked there as a programmer analyst back in 1975. Feeling amazed and reverent, I recalled a somber moment in ’78, when I had stood uneasily beside the caskets of George Moscone and Harvey Milk, who’d been assassinated by a Twinkie-eating, gay-envious supervisor named Dan White. He’d actually gotten away with blaming his Twinkie addiction for the murder, which seemed doubly horrible. The murders and court process ended in an all-out fag revolt, a violent upheaval against injustice called the White Night riots, which destroyed millions of dollars in city assets by fire and destruction. I connected to that sense of judicial betrayal just as I have connected to the more recent Black Lives Matter protests. Our little party grew when we were joined by three of Sean’s homo-friendly cohorts. We all huddled outside of the office, listening to footsteps clack and echo across the polished granite floors. City Hall’s epic grandeur had survived much social and geological upheaval. The Loma Prieta earthquake of 1989 had nearly destroyed it, but thanks to painstaking renovations, the dome and lofty bulwarks still stood majestic. I observed handsome Sean interacting with the smaller children. He was every bit the doting uncle. I smiled to myself as he rocked each child in his arms, communicating familial affection with his warm hugs and gentle gaze. Watching him that day, I knew he’d be a great dad. He made the kids laugh. I felt envious of the fact that he might someday have a child. This was another possibility I had never had the luxury of considering. The magistrate emerged from the rear chamber wearing a long black gown, but no spiked heels. Smiling, with paperwork in hand, she escorted our group to the highest gallery. As we gathered beneath the vaulted canopy, the echoes of our whispered conversations and squeaky shoes ricocheted around its circular ridges. My legs and arms began to tingle with anticipation. Lars and Sean gazed into each other’s eyes. They seemed to embody the deepest possible connection between two souls. My heart took flight. They had been happy together for over a year, and legal marriage seemed the appropriate and necessary next step. I felt like a proud father. With the rest of us surrounding them in a circle, Lars and Sean stood shoulder to shoulder, facing the justice of the peace. “We are gathered here today to unite in matrimony Sean and Lars,” said the magistrate. “The marriage contract is most solemn and profound, and it is to be entered into thoughtfully, with deep appreciation for the meaning it imparts and the responsibilities it entails. My words do not marry you; it is the love in your hearts that binds you to one another. Today, you are taking a pledge to enrich each other’s lives, to stand together as partners, to cushion the difficulties and to celebrate the joys. Please remember that love, loyalty, and respect form the foundation of a happy home. Please face each other and hold hands. Do you, Sean, take Lars as your lawfully wedded spouse? To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish as long as you both shall live?” “I do,” said Sean. If the events of the ’70s and ’80s could be compared to an exploding nuclear bomb with the dust settling afterward, their wedding day felt like the first vestiges of a new life emerging from the rubble: a renewal of gay hope, cherubs making love atop the cultural detritus of the past. I felt giddy. It seemed that FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

all my growing pains and heartbreak had been worthwhile. To see gay love validated by society and sanctioned by law—I couldn’t believe what had just transpired before my eyes. My heart raced as the bright sun scattered its rays across the ancient sculptures. My chest filled with joy, and I could feel the tears clinging to my eyelashes. My face reddened. Was I about to cry? I hadn’t expected this. “Do you, Lars, take Sean for your lawfully wedded spouse? To have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish for as long as you both shall live?” “I do,” Lars said. “You may exchange rings.” Nobody made the obvious joke or snickered, which sort of shows how far we’ve come. Sean slipped one ring onto Lars’s finger, repeating the ceremonial words. Lars placed the other ring on Sean’s finger, and made his own pledge. Mrs. Johnson softly wept. Standing beside her, watching her son embark upon this journey, I felt paternal warmth toward Sean. All things seemed right and good. Tears spilled down my cheeks. I wasn’t embarrassed. “Now that you have joined yourselves in solemn matrimony, may you strive to meet this commitment with the same love, devotion, and friendship that you possess today. And have fun! Do you promise each other?” Well, that’s one promise any gay couple can easily stick to. Sean and Lars smiled into each other’s eyes in a silent pledge. “And so, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the State of California, I now pronounce you spouses for life. Congratulations! You may kiss if you wish.” As their lips touched, my knees weakened. I completely lost it. Bawling, Mrs. Johnson and I fell into each other’s arms. The magistrate beamed at our group, her eyes tearing up. “This is a love for all time. I just know it.” Outside City Hall, Lars and Sean posed for photos—first just the two of them, then the entire wedding party. The magistrate who had performed the ceremony came out through the big doors in normal street attire, and asked to have her photo taken with the couple. “I want to add my blessings. I have a good feeling about you two.” I, too, had a good feeling about them. I fully appreciated that Sean and Lars were entering a union that was just right for them. Perfect, in fact! My life had taken a specific course without the option of marriage or having children. Sean and Lars were my favorite lovebirds, and their relationship was so beautiful. * * * To this day, the wider social significance of this event astounds me. I’ve survived cancer, progressive multifocal leukoencephalopathy (PML), Miller Fisher syndrome, and HIV, which have caused me to form my own unique rainbow perspective. I see life as a pink ribbon of wonders. Yes, sometimes it’s complicated and difficult; but I am certain of one thing. Our magic is our love. Each moment you or I experience deep love for another—and feel that love returned—we have captured the essential prize of the universe. Tim Patten is a retired software engineer and author of the newly released Roller Babes: 1950s Women of Roller Derby. He also wrote his coming-out autobiography, My Razzle Dazzle, under the pen name Todd Peterson. He writes articles for many magazines that support the modern men’s liberation movement.

Embracing Authenticity Now True to Himself, A Gay Pastor Sees Potential for Black Churches to Fight HIV

Today’s question is this: How authentic are you living? Are you living life as you are; are you living life as you want to; are you living life the way that you were meant to?…It is worth everything that it will cost you to live authentic… and once you’re free, you’re free.—Pastor Mitchell Jones, #AskPastorJones video

column, “Ask Pastor Jones,” which he uses to respond to questions about faith and sexuality. And as Jones has stepped out into the light of authenticity, he cast light on how a religious environment steeped in homophobia can foster not only secrets and pain but also the spread of HIV.

reviously an anti-LGBT minister, Mitchell Jones came to accept himself and divorced his wife of five years. But he still had secrets: specifically, the five men he’d had affairs with during his marriage. For Jones, inauthentic living caused pain to himself and to his family. Still “Pastor Jones,” he ministers in a different way. He left the pulpit—though he has plans for an LGBT-affirming church—but continues to lead Bible studies and minister to others. He also started a social media-based advice

A Double Life In September 2015, Jones wrote an opinion piece for Advocate.com called “The High Cost of the Black Church’s Homophobia.” He wrote: “The black church is deceiving itself and its followers. By rejecting and isolating gay church members, it’s simply forcing individuals to live in the closet, and enabling them to engage in secretive, risky sexual behavior. “Strong, God-fearing believers often lead double lives….It’s a cosmic

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photo by Stanz Eyez Photography

by Stevie St. John

photo courtesy M. Jones

deception, whose consequences affect not only the gay person’s life, but everyone he or she touches. Well, the black church’s homophobia comes at a costly price tag.… “The incidence of HIV and AIDS consistently rises within our community because we refuse to admit that we indulge in intimacy with the same sex. We hide in the closet or remain on the down low in a desperate effort to preserve our faith, protect our loved ones, and gain acceptance as a normal man or woman, according to the expectations of our church and community. “But like the Bible says: What’s done in the dark comes to light.” Jones sees the potential for the black church to play an important part in HIV prevention—by ending taboos and judgment and offering education. “They don’t believe in having sex before marriage so to talk about sex…they think they’re giving permission,” he said. But Jones pointed out that people don’t need permission to have sex—and if sex is discussed openly, there are opportunities to educate people and to prevent HIV and unplanned pregnancies. “It is happening in your community. It is happening in your congregation,” he said. He noted that many congregants seek out ministers when they find out that their children are pregnant or HIV-positive—showing that premarital sex is happening and prevention opportunities ignored. “We only hide what we feel judged for and what is not accepted,” Jones said. “Education and acceptance will go a long way in prevention of HIV.” Jones himself lived a double life. It began with self-deception. Growing up in a black Baptist church, which had “a conservative view and a non-tolerant view of homosexuality,” Jones thought his same-sex attractions were “a phase” and something he had to fight to avoid eternal punishment. At one point, he believed that he had been “delivered” from homosexuality. In denial, he wed a young single mother named Tiffany, and the couple had more children together. Ultimately, Jones deceived not only himself but also his wife, having affairs FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

with men. His religious views evolved, and he eventually told his wife he was gay. The couple separated in 2009, and they finalized their divorce last spring. But Jones continued to keep his infidelities secret—until making a very public act of confession. Telling the Truth Jones owned up to his infidelity and deceit on the OWN network series Iyanla: Fix My Life, in which author

and inspirational speaker Iyanla Vanzant, according to the show’s website, “goes behind closed doors and deep inside people’s lives for emotional, riveting conversations.” It started with a letter Jones wrote to the series. One day, the producer called him and they talked about Jones’ story. That was the beginning of his and Tiffany’s participation in the episode “Fix My Secret Life as a Gay Pastor.” continued on page 62

Out of the Fire Anointed, Inspired, Delivered & Saved, Artist Joyce McDonald Rewrites Longterm Survival

“HIV

is not the end. Having no hope is,” Broklyn-based artist Joyce McDonald explains deep into our conversation. Also an AIDS advocate and an ordained, licensed reverend, McDonald shapes clay as deftly as she she shapes words. It’s no wonder her message has an impact no matter what form her expression takes, whether she is creating sculptures and paintings or conducting her AIDS and other outreach ministries around New York City. Hope has surely been a companion as much as her Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, on her journey, which might be encapsulated by one of the titles of her pieces: From Bondage to Freedom. The sculpture of a woman shows two faces, one side distraught, one side serene. Asked about her inspiration for the piece, she relates that she had been in constant “personal bondage” for over thirty years before her release. “That’s why I have it spinning—on a podium that spins. Because, finally, things came around,” she shares. “This woman is completely free of her past personal demons— past hurts, tragedies, drug addiction, all enmeshed together.” McDonald was diagnosed positive in 1995. Knowing of her past injection drug use, the Rev. Dr. Mark V. C. Taylor, her pastor at her place of worship, The Church of the Open Door, urged her to test and even offered to accompany her to the appointment

to test alongside her. It was a moment she will never forget, and she still admires his approach. “You can’t just walk into a church and say, ‘You have to have an HIV test.’ It has to be done in a Godly, loving way,” she notes. Later she learned she had contracted HIV in 1985. In late 1993, while waiting for the drug dealer to come, never intending to stop getting high, so deep in addiction that she told people with whom she did drugs that if she died she wanted them to bury the heroin in the casket with her, she heard God’s voice, went to church, and accepted Christ into her heart. “I just started telling it on the mountain. He set me totally free.” Twenty-two years sober, she has found peace. “Now I’m really grateful for everything I lived through....I was not happy that I was molested, not happy that I was raped, not happy that I was tricked into prostitution, not happy that I was abused, battered, kidnapped...all of that, but it was a blessing in disguise. God gets all the glory, but when I tell my story [the message is that] you can make it. You can get your mind back. I had doctors telling me I was going to be in the psych unit forever....My mind would never register right,” she says about a psychiatric diagnosis whose textbook outcome never came to pass. “I have a very strong relationship with the Lord Christ Jesus, who I believe in. And He has never failed me. Even at the times like Standing in the Time of Adversities, 1998, kiln-fired clay, 7 inches wide and 10 inches tall, 2 inches deep

when I went from HIV to AIDS he had me in everything.” When at Sloan-Kettering, when complications from thyroid surgery arose, doctors suddenly needed to make an incision in her neck while she was awake. She informed them she was positive. The doctors left and returned in “space suits.” Her daughter was bawling, but McDonald found herself thanking Jesus and smiling. “I had the strongest relevation for why I believe in what I do now for God because I felt Him holding me.” A little later, after she was all stitched up, her neck bled again. A Code Blue was called. Her close relations were phoned because the doctors did not think she was going to make it. But she did. Afterward, she created paintings in response. Your Faith Has Made You Well (20001) shows a despearate plea to Jesus. Says Joyce: “As I lay bleeding, doctors left the room. Mark 5:25 came up like a movie and the story ministered to me.” Another painting, Healing Power, shows figures more loosely rendered. Created when McDonald was homebound after the Code Blue incident, it is part of series where she closed her eyes and her hand moved as if directed by God. The healing power of the Lord is a theme she returns to time and again. Another one of her sculptures, Standing in the Time of Adversities, which shows a woman’s face and neck, pockmarked with holes, bears witness to the scars that remain after the storm, that are part of her now, as the artist explains. “I can feel peace in her face. If you can look past the scars and all those dots, A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

photo by Alina Oswald

by Chael Needle

A&U Gallery she has peace. Every hole in there was a moment of her pain, despair, all the things she went through and is going through even now. Every hole is something she survived or went through in her life [whether physical or mnetal].” McDonald goes on to point out her strong neck, her solid foundation. “She stands in her day of adversities,” she says, mentioning that it also echoes her God-given ability to stand after a period of immobility. “She’s fixed on not losing her peace in the midst of all those things.... And [that peace] was from God, because that peace that you see in her face can only come from God.” Her spirituality and creative expression see her through her struggles with physical pain, she says, referring to neuropathy and shingles, among other condtions, over the years. Her art, as she describes it, is often created in the midst of pain. She refers to Praise the Lord, which shows a woman in an awkward turn and produced while she suffered from nerve damage and shingles. It represents freedom, she says. From March 2009 to September or October, she would scream as “fireballs” rolled through her legs. Her mother would run to her and pour ice on her to try to relieve the unbearable pain, “Between the screams, when I wasn’t screaming, I would run and do art....[W]hen everything would stop I would go and find some clay and do some art. For that period of time it stopped.... all I could do is just pray to God, just pray, pray, pray, for I knew I had gotten past that horrific time.” Those times when pain is relieved often happen when she is in the creative zone, she says. While her neuropathy still flares up, sometimes twenty-four hours a day, she can produce at any time, though she has slowed. She recently found the strength to participate in Love Positive Women at Visual AIDS, however. McDonald has worked hard to recover her Victorious self. (For her, the V in HIV stands for spiritual Victory, she says.) And she has developed a deep well of resilience for struggling through any kind of pain. She recently mourned the death of her sister, Janet McDonald, an international attorney and writer (Project Girl) who had lived in Paris for twenty years, and the death of filmmaker Miriam Perez, who drowned before she could finish the documentary, Holler, that she was making of Joyce’s life. I offer that she does not believe in suppressing the negative, but McDonald corrects me, enriches the chronology. “Oh no, I was like that. That’s what kept me on heroin for so long. Because when I would FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

Praise the Lord, 2009, Crayola clay on canvas, Magic Markers, 9 by 12 inches, 1 inch deep come off it those [choices] would be staring me in my face. I’d be embarrassed, I’d be ashamed of all the things that happened, beyond my control and the things that I chose to happen because of my drug use. But I came to understand, way back in ’85, that not telling anybody all those things were those little dots, they all added up,” she says, explaining that’s partly how she came to empathy, a love-thy-neighbor approach to others who may be abusing their bodies. “Now I’m a little older, now I know that everything is connected—it was because of this then that happened and it grew and grew and grew. [They were all] things that I was hiding. I did suppress.”

Now, McDonald uses her voice, her experiences, and her perspective to pay tribute to those who have died before us and to help others in need. “My heart is burdened for a lot of people because there’s still a whole population of people who, before they made those new medicines, crossed that unspoken, invisible line,” says McDonald, who only started taking HIV meds in 2009. “You know in the early eighties we would see people. We saw the ravages of AIDS. We don’t see any of that now. We see Magic Johnson on the poster. We see posters of people smiling with the pills. People have a whole different understanding of what HIV and AIDS is about,” she says.

Healing Power, 2001, house paint on canvas paper, 11 by 15 inches Communities still need education about HIV/AIDS; the level of empathy is just not there yet, she decries. She has noticed that testifying about HIV in churches has declined of late. She mourns the closure of local day programs and residential treatment facilities for individuals living with HIV/AIDS, such as Rivington House and the Robert Mapplethorpe Residential Treatment Facility. (People were scattered—and devastated, she says, including her brother who is living with HIV/AIDS.) And she bemoans the fact that AIDS has become marginalized, even though people are still dying. She has noticed changes in the World AIDS Day event she has spoken at for the past ten years. This last year, she was shuttled to the end of the program and told to hurry up. The event itself morphed into more of a catch-all health fair. She sees this “disappearing” of AIDS happening in other public-health sites, too, where the disease is inadvertently occluded. “Of all the illnesses in the world, espe-

cially in the United States, AIDS should always be singled out until there is a cure. Why should it be singled out? Because people are still being stigmatized and discriminated against. It’s here in 2016.” Last year, she went to a prestigious Manhattan spa for a facial. She had just become mobile again and, on that day, she had been ministering to a close relation with cancer—all she wanted was some relaxation. She happened to mention that she was positive and suddenly the technician disappeared, only to return after a long while to inform her that she could not be provided the service. “Is it because I said I was HIV?” she had asked. He said, “Exactly.” Joyce was shocked. She had been twice on missions to the Dominican Republic (where giving your HIV testimony is not always a safe thing to do, she says); and she had testified on the streets of Brooklyn, on TV, in church, showing people that living with HIV/AIDS is not a source of shame, so she found it hard to believe that professionals were discriminating against her to her face. “I was in tears, because A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

A&U Gallery That’s the wrong thing to do to the right person.” She considered filing a suit, but has yet to do so. She explains: “I was not hurt for myself because I can handle it.... But I was hurting for the people who are hiding right now. Because I know many people do not tell people their status. They only go to their doctor. They go to the program. And then for the thousands who are living in nursing homes and the hospitals that have already crossed that line. I know people right now in 2016 that will not tell their families, anyone....I’m talking about the people—the people who are living in our buildings, the people who are next door, the people who are in families who hear what other people say,” she says, thankful for her own supportive church and family, which, besides her brother, includes her mother, two daughters, eleven grandchildren, and two great-grandchildren. She states that it is important Your Faith Has Made You Well, 2001, watercolor, Out of the Fire, 2009, canvas, Crayola clay, for people to see that people like canvas paper, Magic Markers, 9 by 12 inches Mod Podge, African fabric, paper towels, her are not ashamed, to see that black and brown Magic Marker, 8 inches you can survive. They need to hear tends to those who have fallen through tall (attached to canvas) the message from someone who the cracks. Her own neuropathy alerted is not hiding, she affirms. “HIV is not now I feel what other people feel. I underher to the fact that individuals may be the end. Having no hope is. You have to stood why people live in fear; I told recepin need of cushioned shoes. This past see it with a new eye,” she says, sharing tion, ‘That’s your policy?’ She said ‘Yep.’ December, she gathered fellow Good her relabelling of the viral acronyms. [I wondered] ‘Am I in the United States?’ Samaritans and collected over 180 pairs For “AIDS,” for example, she of house shoes in a little under a month. From Bondage to Freedom, reassigns the meaning thusly: 2007-8, air-dry clay, clear They went to an HIV care facility to A: Anointed, blessed by God; coat, 10 inches wide and 8 I: Inspired, by the Holy Spirit; deliver them, hoping to impress upon the inches tall, 5 inches deep residents that they are still remembered. D: Delivered, by the word of It was a joyous visit, full of prayers, song, God; S: Saved. “I have to see crying, and hugs. “People had hug deprithose words different.” Her activism is closely tied to her faith. vation, my brothers and sisters, all nationalities, all ages. They hugged us. We all She has been licensed through and is a were crying. Five of us—we hugged 156 member of the New York State Chaplain people on December 22, and then a few Task Force, which helps faciliate minof us went back on Christmas Day. istering, whether it’s a bedside visit or “Some had been there for years. Even raising awareness about systemic needs in that situation there’s still hope,” she like housing. She was the coordinator of reflects. Their condition might change, she an AIDS ministry from 2000 to 2014. At says. They might pick up a pen and begin nursing homes, she has set up spa and to write. They might create. beauty days, blessed barber shops, and other thinking-outside-of-the-box efforts. She started an initiative called Keep Your Pearls Girls, which teaches universal precautions and HIV-specific empathy to girls ages five to twelve at her church and at P.S. 287. She also conducts a clothes ministry and a ministry where people correspond to individuals, of all serostatuses, who are incarcerated. And she always has time to take a phone call for testing advice. Her Seemingly Forgotten ministy FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

Locate an archive of Joyce McDonald’s work at: www.visualaids.org. Find her on Facebook at: www.facebook.com/Joyce-McDonald-From-theShooting-Gallery-to-the-Art-Gallery-148166952524. Chael Needle is Managing Editor of A&U.

Of Lust, Men, Meth & Healing AIDS Activist David Fawcett, PhD, Explores the Intersection of Addiction and HIV Risk in a New Book by Alina Oswald

photos by Howard Zucker

irst thing you notice when meeting Dr. David Fawcett face to face is his height. I certainly did when I attended one of his book events last December at the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Community Center in New York City. Tall and slender, he gracefully moved around the room, shaking hands and welcoming people to the event that was about to start. His voice was warm and reassuring, as if to confirm that you’re in a safe space. Many might be familiar with his work through his writings for TheBody.com or Positively Aware. Many more might be aware of the workshops and training the substance-abuse expert offers around the country and the world. Others might know him through his work in Florida, where his private psychology practice is located, and where, among others, he is the founder and chair of the South Florida Meth Task Force, and the director of the Pride Institute in Ft. Lauderdale. The winner of several awards and recognitions, such as Broward Social Worker of the Year in both 2012 and 2015, David Fawcett, PhD, LCSW, is a certified sex therapist and clinical psychotherapist with thirty years of experience. After his HIV diagnosis in 1988, he became interested in

mental health issues and HIV, in particular among gay men. Nowadays, he is a national trainer for the HIV Spectrum project of the National Association of Social Workers, and facilitates workshops for gay men and individuals living with HIV/AIDS at retreats and national events, such as Positive Living, the largest conference for people living with HIV/AIDS. Dr. Fawcett is also the author of Lust, Men and Meth, his recently published book that he introduced at The Center, in New York City. The book is not a light read, but it’s a must-read for many people, especially those who are or know somebody who is struggling with drug addiction in general, or meth addiction in particular. With a foreword by longtime activist Mark S. King, Lust, Men, and Meth offers, as its subtitle states, A Gay Man’s Guide to Sex and Recovery and a unique, realistic look inside an individual’s struggle with issues such as drug use (methamphetamine in particular), sex, and recovery, while also providing vital tools for the professionals working with these individuals. Divided in three parts, Lust, Men and Meth offers a survival guide that people can use not only as they go through the recovery process, but also as they try to remain clean of meth, of drugs in gener-

al, for the rest of their lives. Extensively documented with numerous case studies, the read not only provides much-needed information, but also solutions. The first part, “The Perfect Storm,” examines the damaging effects of methamphetamine, on some gay men in particular; the dangers that lurk at the intersection of meth use and unprotected sex; and the strong connection between drug use and HIV transmission. “Remember when we only had black and white television and then came color TV—it’s the same with methamphetamine and sex,” a meth user is quoted as saying in Lust, Men and Meth. “Meth highjacks the brain’s reward system, which is designed to make activities essential to our survival highly pleasurable,” Dr. Fawcett writes in his book. “It intensifies sexual experiences to the point where the user feels that ‘meth-sex’ is the ultimate sexual experience, and expands personal sexual boundaries, resulting in riskier sexual interaction and a hightened interest in exploring more remote corners of sexual fantasies.” The second part, “Exploring the Sexual Universe,” tells the meth addiction story from a sex therapist’s perspective, taking on topics such as the role of dopamine and how its levels are dramatically triggered by A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

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and honest conversation about sex, drugs, meth, and HIV; and sets the stage for people to talk freely about their own experiences, ask questions, and seek answers, as they did at the event I mentioned. After Dr. Fawcett presented and talked about his work in a room full of people, which included, among others, PrEP pioneer Damon L. Jacobs [A&U, December 2015] and Visual AIDS’ former programs manager, Ted Kerr, questions poured in, covering a wide range of topics—from triggers (that enable the use of meth) to neurotransmitters and dopamine, from brain neuroplasticity to the damaging fusion between methamphetamine, chemsex and suicide Tuesday, unprotected sex and HIV, from using PrEP to finding a path to recovery. And the overall message that came through was loud and clear, and also promising: “There are solutions. People do recover.” But the recovery process, especially recovery from meth use, is often a long and winding road. To find out more, I called Dr. Fawcett after the book event, to learn more. During our phone conversation, he reminded me that the recovery rates, which, to an outsider, could seem quite disappointing, are slightly above ten percent for meth, sometimes as high as twenty to twenty-five percent for alcohol recovery. “It’s tricky,” he further explains, pointing

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LGBT Community Center photo courtesy D. Fawcett

meth use, the brain’s ability to change and adapt as a result to drug use and compulsive behaviors, and also drug recovery. Here, the author brings up the work of researchers like John Money and William Granzig, who “have made significant contributions to our understanding of sexual templates. This understanding of templates makes clear how a drug such as methamphetamine hijacks our brains and distorts our deepest fantasies into unrecognizable drives with supercharged and destructive erotic power.” Fawcett continues: “Once templates develop, they are, then, extremely resistant to change.” The third and last part, “Restoring Your Life,” takes a closer look at the process of recovery in particular from methamphetamine, while rebuilding relationships with oneself and with others. “Everyone getting clean should have a complete physical examination,” Dr. Fawcett writes, referring to the life-threatening complications related to chronic meth use. “This is especially true for anyone living with HIV/AIDS, since meth use nearly always disrupts adherence to antiretroviral medication. Resistance to antiretroviral medications may have occurred due to inconsistent adherence routines, so laboratory tests to determine the effectiveness of the current regimen may be required.” Maybe most importantly, Lust, Men and Meth offers a safe space for an open

out that recovery rates depend on the length of time during which an individual has been drug-free, and those lengths of time can vary drastically. “Sometimes it’s like comparing apples with oranges with those numbers,” he adds. Dr. Fawcett also reminds of the reason why recovery is so difficult nowadays. About a decade ago, when methamphetamine was considered the (then) new AIDS-like epidemic, as covered in Suicide Tuesday by Duncan Osborne, the drug itself was less pure, hence, less addictive. “I think it’s our job letting people know what’s out there,” he says. “Meth today is much more devastating than [it was years ago] because, instead of [using] the local mom-andpop laboratories, [nowadays] they do it industrially, they got it down to a science. The purity is much higher than we’ve seen before. So, people who could maybe handle using meth a couple times a year, at a circuit party of some kind, have a little more of a hard time now, because now it’s sort of a different drug than it was before. We [still] call it meth, but the purity has increased.” He points out a very “scary” chart that shows the present purity level in the ninety percentiles. “It’s a dramatic bump in the purity in the last ten years. And, ironically, the purity goes up and the price goes down. It’s a pretty bad combination.” Methamphetamine leads not only to more unprotected sex, which, in turn, could lead to more HIV infections, but the damage this particular drug can cause is multifaceted, and just plain scary. Meth leads to apathy; meth users interpret facial expressions as hostility. Also, while on meth, individuals are not eating, and not drinking water…hence they could end up in the hospital with kidney failure. “In my experience, what trips people up is that they think that [the negative effects] won’t happen to them,” Dr. Fawcett explains. “But there’s kind of a denial of their ability to control and handle [the drug]. And that kind of takes people by surprise.” Prevention messages about the dangers of methamphetamine need to be straightforward. A shaming approach doesn’t usually work. “[We have to] do our best to appeal to

people’s strengths that would give them what we call resistance skills,” he explains, “so that, if someone offers [meth] to them or if they encounter it somewhere by chance, they have more power to not pick it up.” When it comes to prevention, HIV prevention also comes to mind. Dr. Fawcett endorses PrEP, but cautions that PrEP can only be used for HIV prevention, not any other STIs. “If somebody is informed enough to take PrEP, they generally have enough knowledge and self-awareness about things, and are more connected to the healthcare system,” he explains. “The big problem with PrEP is that [some believed] that people would go wild and not take any precautions. And what we see is that those [on PrEP] actually become more careful. But I always have to make sure,” he reiterates, “[to inform] that PrEP [prevents just] HIV. It doesn’t prevent anything else. [Whether you’re in] Ft. Lauderdale, L.A. or New York there’s always a high risk of other sexually transmitted infections that are out there, which people should be aware of. But PrEP is a wonderful tool, and I think it’s a great advantage for people, but it’s not the only answer.” He further explains that people taking PrEP to prevent HIV often also try to prevent other health risks. What’s important is the mindset that comes with using this kind of prevention tools. Plus, those on PrEP go to see their doctor every several months, and that kind of care makes a big difference. There are some interesting brain scans showing the changes happening in the brain, when an individual is using meth. “There are switches in the brain, and it really makes it difficult for these individuals to go back and use those substances without control,” Dr. Fawcett explains. “That’s a tough pill to swallow.” His goal for himself—he’s been through his own journey of recovering from alcohol addiction—and also for his patients is to really be completely abstinent, especially with meth, because it is such a powerful, addictive drug. When it comes to recovery, the brain is

capable of rewiring itself through a long process called neuroplasticity, which could last up to eighteen months. Scientists are not yet sure if, during this process, the brain can go back to what it was before the person began using drugs. That’s always a game. For some people it comes back, but that’s not always the case. That being said, recovery is possible,

and it’s a lifelong commitment. The first steps are usually the toughest, because, oftentimes, when using meth, people burn all their bridges, and so they don’t really have a support network to see them through their recovery. “That complicates the issue dramatically,” Dr. Fawcett comments. “But I think, if they can reach out to a friend or to their doctor, to anybody, continued on page 62

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SOUL MOM

More than Hollywood’s funny ‘it’ girl, a title she quickly earned with Style Network’s home-makeover show Clean House and Comedy Central’s Reno 911! (both 2003), Niecy Nash is a self-proclaimed old-soul and mom who channels her own life experience to make her characters—like her role in the AIDS-themed Boys on the Side, her very first film gig—even more relatable. The Emmy Award-winning actress is garnering praise for her serious turns on and off the big screen while using her effervescent, maternal voice to urge youngsters to stay vigilant against HIV. by Sean Black 42

photos by Robert Ector A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

JANUARY 2016 • A&U

“When the power of love overcomes the love of power that is when we will know peace.... ”

f late, everything’s coming up roses for Niecy Nash; a happy home life, solid faith, and a booming acting career with three stellar, hit television roles (Fox Network’s Scream Queens, TV Land’s The Soul Man, in its fifth season, and HBO’s Getting On with the 2015 Primetime Emmy nom for Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series). She’s just gueststarred on Fox’s Brooklyn Nine-Nine, too. To say that the actress known early on for her popping, behindthe-ear flowers is busy is an understatement of immense proportions. All of this on the heels of her notable 2014 role in director Ava DuVernay’s epic film Selma about Martin Luther King Jr.’s historic Alabama march to secure equal voting rights, the glam in-demand triple threat opens up about life, the invincibility of youth, and why she finds comfort in her consummate role as Momma Denise. Carving out some time for this phone interview on the airdate of the season finale of Scream Queens Nash succinctly weighs in when we begin and I ask her

about the recent, disturbing San Bernardino shootings just 100 miles east of her L.A. hometown. “When the power of love overcomes the love of power that is when we will know peace,” she opens up and wisely shares. Through all the glitz and giggles of her comedic assent, life hasn’t been forever rosy for Niecy, born Carol Denise Ensley on February 23, 1970, in Palmdale, California. There have been thorns along the way for this actor, author and producer who spent her earliest childhood years in St. Louis. After returning to Los Angeles, growing up and chasing the dreams that TV sensation Lola Falana had planted in her head when she was just a child, she tragically lost her younger brother, Michael, to gun violence on his high school campus before his eighteenth birthday. Realizing then her gift for making people laugh and smile she slowly lifted herself, her mother and the loved ones around her out of the despair and sadness over the loss of their beloved family member. “Well, I think that for me how we treat one another goes back to our relationship with God. And I feel if there is anything askew in our hearts and our minds then we should go back to our manufacturer. I think the thing that we are all created for is love, and that’s the bottom-line.It’s the one thing too that I feel as a whole that humanity struggles with the most.” The heartbreaking event subsequently led Niecy and her mother to their ambassadorial roles with M.A.V.I.S (Mothers Against Violence in Schools) shortly after Michael’s death.Founded in 1993 by their mother, Margaret Ensley, an earlier victim to gun violence herself, M.A.V.I.S. teaches and advocates nonviolence as well as lending support to parents and schools in violence prevention. Nash has never steered away from calls to action and used her growth from personal pain as a source of strength. As part of her current philanthropy bound in

her own natural, maternal concerns, Nash has stepped up when original Dreamgirl Sheryl Lee Ralph has simply asked. “As you should. That is what you do when she calls,” declares Nash. “Sheryl Lee has been a champion for the prevention of HIV for a very long time and so many of the DIVAS have supported her events because we know how passionate she is about this cause.” In 1990, Sheryl Lee Ralph [A&U, 2008; 2015] founded The DIVA Foundation, a nonprofit organization seeking to raise awareness about HIV and AIDS and in particular its impact on women and children. It’s signature event, DIVAS Simply Singing!, has brought together top-notch singers and performers for a one-night-only extravaganza which has continued now for twenty-five years, making it the longest consecutive running musical AIDS benefit in the country. Over the years DIVAS who have responded to her call have included The Supreme Mary Wilson, Chaka Khan, Faith Evans, Jennifer Holliday, the late Natalie Cole and Teena Marie, Kelly Price [A&U, April 2011], Brenda Russell, Loretta Devine [A&U, January 2008], Jenifer Lewis [A&U, May 2005], Patti LaBelle [A&U, June 2005], Sharon Stone, Whoopi Goldberg [A&U, June 2000] and Nash to name only a few. Nash continues, “First of all, you believe in what she’s doing and she puts it together in such a way that is classy, fun and entertaining and at the same time you get a message. I call it edutainment because its education and entertainment at the same time. She’s been a tireless champion and I love to support her every chance I get.” Sheryl Lee Ralph tells A&U, “My friend, my sister, the divinely inspired victoriously audacious DIVA Niecy Nash has never shied away from using her voice or from getting involved in the fight against HIV/AIDS.” Ralph, Nash’s close friend and matron of honor at her 2011 wedding, adds, “Not A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

security photo by Matthias Clamer/FOX; all other photos by Patti Perret/FOX

As security officer Denise Hemphill in FOX’s Scream Queens, Nash grounded her zany character with a mother-knows-best sensibility to protect the sorority girls.

only has she raised her voice in solidarity in several DIVAS Simply Singing! Galas, but she has even tried to sing a song too.” Like Sheryl, Niecy was inspired to join the fight against AIDS because the disease hit her circle of friends. “We had a family friend who was infected back in the eighties. So that is when I first heard about it. That was back at a time when everyone was still really unsure of how it was actually contracted and how you could be affected if you were just even around someone who had it. So I learned about it and came to the awareness about it at a time when there was a lot of fear. And now there’s so much knowledge and so much information and so many ways to educate yourself—I just feel that this is the part that is absolutely necessary—the knowledge and the information is out there for everybody - for anybody who is sleeping with anybody,” as she uses dramatic inflection of her voice to punctuate her point. But individuals, especially youth, often have a hard time hearing the message. “I FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

think the thing about being young is you feel very invincible. Young people feel that because youth is on their side it automatically means they can do anything, and nothing will harm them. It’s just not wise, not to be safe. I just think that when you are young and in love you throw caution to the wind and expect that bad things that happen in the world will happen to everybody else except you. And that’s just not true. “The thing of it is—it’s a gift to yourself to protect yourself because the things that come along with having unprotected sex are not necessary. You can still achieve the same level of intimacy and be safe, that’s the thing. It is a gift you give to yourself.” As a mother of three, ages sixteen, twenty, and twenty-four, plus one stepson from her marriage now to Jay Tucker, Niecy’s maternal sense of protection always kicks in, knowing, as any good parent does, that the message needs to be tailored to young ears. “Every child is different,” urges Nash. “So you know when the conversations come

up and you feel like there is a certain thing on that particular child’s radar—then it’s something [at that time] to be discussed. Once they come into the awareness of what sex is then you have to address it and talk about it in ways that are healthy.” Unsurprisingly, her compassion and her caring heart allowed her to inhabit her first film role—in Boys on the Side—in a movie that touched on living with HIV. “At that time I think I was just so overwhelmed and grateful with the opportunity to have a scene with Ms. Whoopie Goldberg. I was so young I was just a baby back then I had never been on a first-class flight. So there were so many firsts in that whole process for me. While I was grateful to be telling that story there was another wave of gratitude that was just to be living my dream and that’s what I was the most present to at that time.” Asked about what Hollywood could do to bring more sensitive films like Boys on the Side to audiences, she responds: “Well, that goes back to the writers because for

scripted television you would have to have a storyline based around AIDS and HIV prevention and/or awareness, or you’d have to have a character in a situation where that subject matter is discussed. If you were going to incorporate it into scripted television, that’s the way that that would have that play out. I also think HBO and Ryan Murphy, who’s my boss on Scream Queens, did an amazing job doing the HBO film The Normal Heart from the screenplay by Larry Kramer. [For Murphy] to tell that story with grace and dignity and compassion was just a beautiful thing.” Ever since that “first-class flight” in

Boys on the Side, Niecy has brought a clear sense of self to her acting role choices. “I would say that I always try to find something in my real life that I can use to make a character relatable. I play Cedric the Entertainer’s wife on The Soul Man and I remember when Cedric first asked me to play his wife, the very first thing I said is: ‘Are we happily married? Because if we aren’t I don’t want to do it. I am not interested in being a smart-talking wife. If I am going to be somebody’s wife on TV then I want to be in love. I want children to be able to turn on the television and to see a [good] example of what love looks like

and people who are trying to co-labor.’ So to that degree I do bring a lot of who I am as a real wife even in terms of pet names and how I talk to my husband—I do bring that to my character.” Even with her role on Scream Queens, playing security guard Denise Hemphill who fancies herself a Columbo when clearly she’s not, Niecy was able to tap into her mother-on-a-mission sensibility. “I feel like I have been a mother for a very long time. I started having children when I was twenty-one so I have been like an old soul and a mom for a very long time. More than Officer Denise I consider that particular character Momma Denise, and her goal is to mother these sorority girls in the Kappa House. So that is a part of my real life that I would say that I bring to that. “And then with respect to Didi Ortley [her character on Getting On] I really am a lover of people, and I want them to be well A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

photos by Lacey Terrell/HBO

Top: Nash as Nurse Didi providing the calm center in a scene from the latest and last season of HBO’S Getting On, with Alex Borstein (left) and Brandon Fobbs; left: with Laurie Metcalf and Borstein, her fellow travelers on the show.

“I really am a lover of people...I want them to be a little better after I leave than they were before I came....”

and better. I want them to be a little better after I leave than they were before I came. So, I am a natural caregiver and in that respect I find that I am in a very comfortable place with very comfortable footing when playing Denise ‘Didi’ Ortley.” FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

While anyone who has seen Niecy on-screen knows she has the acting chops that can swing audiences from heartbreak to hilarity, her identity is clearly a throughline. “When it comes to my job off screen I feel that my role, my ‘who’ is to show up

whether it is on a set, or on the red carpet, or behind the scenes at some event and to be of service—that’s my goal—that’s my ‘who.’” Sean Black is a Senior Editor of A&U.

STRAIGHT

to The Point

Author Precious A. Jackson on Heterosexual Men, HIV Prevention & Thriving While Living with HIV by Stevie St. John Photographed Exclusively for A&U by Sean Black

hen it comes to HIV prevention, HIV-positive author Precious A. Jackson sees a need for more straight talk— meaning talk about straight men. Through her writing and public speaking, Jackson has shared many facets of her life, including her own story of living with HIV. In addition to her current professional work with the City of Pasadena Health Department, Jackson has in the past done other HIV advocacy work. However, she says that she has pulled back from activism and advocacy because of “unnecessary politics” in that arena. The Letter Jackson’s story began with a letter from her ex-boyfriend. He was HIV-positive, the letter said. Jackson got tested. When she learned she was HIV-positive, she said, “The first thing that came to my mind was, ‘Who is going to want me now?’” That was in 1998, the same year that President Bill Clinton acknowledged AIDS as a “severe and ongoing health crisis,” and just one year after antiretroviral therapy became “the new standard of HIV care,” according to AIDS.gov, a U.S. Department of Health & Human Services website. Jackson was twenty-six years-old. “I was young, outgoing, and vibrant and went to being depressed, and my self-esteem and self-worth was at its all-time low,” Jackson said. “It wasn’t until I went to my first HIV support group in August 2000 [and saw people] who looked like me living and thriving [that] I decided that I wasn’t going to be defeated by this disease.” Sharing Her Story After finding the support group that served as her turning point, Jackson wanted to share her story. She

A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

wasn’t a part of any of the groups considered most at-risk for HIV, yet she had become positive. She wanted others to realize it could happen to them, too. “I decided that I wanted to tell my story to other women,” she said. “I wanted women to see me in themselves, and I prayed they would listen to the message and make better choices for themselves.” In addition to public speaking, Jackson has shared her story in a biography, Revelation: Unveiling the Mask, which was published last year. She told the African Americans on the Move book club (www.aambookclub.com/unveiling-themask-in-the-situation-roomwith-precious-a-jackson) that “I needed to write about my struggles of making poor choices, which led me to being a survivor of intimate partner violence. During my journey, I learned how to love myself and understood my worth as a woman. My book is dedicated to women who still suffer in silence from intimate partner violence. I want to send the message just because you’ve been through it or going through this situation, there is life after abuse.” Away from Activism Previously a proclaimed AIDS activist who worked with an initiative to train ministers about HIV and AIDS, Jackson has retreated from those aspects of her work because of what she sees as “unnecessary politics.” “I feel the people who make the decisions for funding to be allocated to the various services for HIV-positive individuals look at them as numbers and not people. The humanity side has long been gone since HIV has become an industry,” Jackson said. Jackson also objects to HIV-prevention messaging that she believes excludes heterosexual men. “If I was involved in HIV advocacy/ activism, I would advocate for prevention messages be created and targeted to heterosexual men who are living with and FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

college graduates, working-class men, and men who are the ‘school of hard knocks.’ The messaging can say ‘I strap up,’ with a condom in his hand alongside a beautiful female. Or create videos on YouTube and other social media outlets showing a straight dude having a conversation with a female that he likes, discussing getting tested for HIV. I also would like to see more barbers having discussions with their clients around sexual reproductive health, and if they get tested then they can get a free haircut.”

at risk for HIV,” she said. “In this industry, they are not inclusive of heterosexual men. I’ve seen it firsthand since I’ve been in a relationship with my significant other… who is also HIV-positive. We’ve been in some of the HIV community meetings in Los Angeles, and I’ve seen how people dismiss him or don’t listen when he has had the floor to speak.... “Now the prevention messages address women adequately, but…for heterosexual men, [they don’t] at all. All of the prevention messages I see are for women, gay, and bisexual and transgender….Just because the numbers aren’t high like fifty percent or eighty-four percent doesn’t mean heterosexual men are not at risk of acquiring HIV…. “HIV-prevention messaging needs to have billboards of straight men from all walks of life from entrepreneurs,

“A Life of Wholeness” Nearly two decades since receiving the letter that marked the beginning of a life-changing journey, Jackson has come a long way from the young woman struggling with depression and poor self-esteem. “It’s been seventeen years I’ve been living and thriving with HIV, and my perspective has changed a lot,” Jackson said. “I know I can live a life of wholeness, achieve all of my dreams, and die of old age. I’m now discussing other struggles I’ve overcome like intimate partner violence, low self-esteem, [and not fully embracing] the importance of spirituality.” Jackson believes that addressing such issues plays an important part in HIV prevention. “I believe people engage in risky behaviors due to underlying issues they are not dealing with. Some of these issues are low self-esteem, trust issues, abuse (sexual, emotional, and verbal). I feel once people deal with their issues… they’ll feel better about themselves and make better decisions,” she concluded. Stevie St. John is an assistant editor at Brief Media, a veterinary medical publishing company based in Tulsa, Oklahoma. Her byline has appeared in many LGBT publications.

Reverent Life After Being Diagnosed in the Army, the Reverend Stacey Latimer Created a Line of Defense and Dedicated Himself to the Epidemic by Dann Dulin

photographed exclusively for A&U by Alina Oswald

ven as a child Stacey Latimer’s sole desire was to be a preacher. A native of Greenville, South Carolina and a Holmes Bible College alumnus, Stacey was ordained in 2005. Now fifty-three, he was recently appointed Bishop-designate. On World AIDS Day this year, he’ll be consecrated. As Auxiliary Bishop, he will be charged with keeping the epidemic at the forefront in communities of color, while connecting faith leaders and ministries, on a national level to resources in their own communities to the needs of the people. In 2010 Pastor Latimer founded the non-denominational ministry, Love Alive International Sanctuary of Praise Worship Center (LAISP), in New York City. A constant inspiration for Stacey has been Rev. Jesse Jackson [A&U, November 2000] and Rev. Al Sharpton. Despite his being diagnosed HIV-positive in 1987 when he was twenty-four, he kept racking up accomplishments. Outliers: The Story of Success by Malcolm Gladwell offers that one factor of being successful is investing 10,000 hours towards your goal. Latimer has succeeded way beyond that. He’s lived, worked, and volunteered in the field of HIV for nearly thirty years. That journey meant facing stigma and homophobia, attempting suicide, and being a test subject for the Walter Reed National Military Medical Center. (“It’s one of the ways to get a second opinion on my healthcare and a way that I give back to the fight for life. Research is a part of not only my medical team, but my critical support system as well.”) Serving in the U.S. Army from 1985 to 1991, in 2012, Stacey was inducted into

the New York State Senate Veterans’ Hall of Fame. That same year he was also presented with the President’s Martin Luther King, Jr. Drum Majors for Service Award. Latimer currently chairs the MSM committee on the New York State Prevention Planning Group, serves as a pastoral care representative in the Brooklyn AIDS Task Force, and is director of New York City Faith in Action for HIV/AIDS. He also serves as Director of Outreach for Watchful Eye, a community-based organization located in Brooklyn whose goal is uniting elected officials, clergy, and community leaders in the fight against HIV and AIDS. Earlier last year Stacey was invited to the White House, along with nearly 150 other African-American and Caribbean faith leaders, for a Day of Prayer. Stacey also writes (he contributed to The Journal of HIV/AIDS & Social Services: “Lessons Learned: Building the Capacity of Community-Based Organizations and Health Departments Implementing HIV Interventions in African American Communities”), has been a guest on radio shows, and has appeared on television news programs as well. On Stacey’s downtime he says he “mostly relaxes at my home.” If he’s feeling low, he’ll consult a therapist, pray, sing, take a walk, maybe watch an episode of his all time favorite sitcom, Sanford and Son, or “sometimes I bring other people in to lift me up.” Dann Dulin: What does HIV and AIDS mean to you? Rev. Stacey Latimer: When I hear those acronyms what comes to mind is “a blessing packaged inside a curse.” Why?

HIV is the very thing that I was told would kill me quickly by medical professionals June of 1987. The diagnosis has carried me through a process that has shook, broke, and quickened me to life anew. Though I have to admit there are times when I hear the acronyms and I think of lives in deep struggle. For most of us who’ve been diagnosed, there’s a great struggle before a great life comes. It’s almost as if HIV comes as the instrument that crushes the grapes (life) so that fine wine (life) may be served (lived). How many people have you lost in the AIDS epidemic? Over the last thirty-three years I’ve lost nine close people to AIDS. I have lost count of other friends, colleagues, and acquaintances whose lives were snatched away and consumed by the deadly effect of AIDS complications. The loss has been so tremendous that there are times I feel I can’t attend another funeral for the sake of my own sanity. When did you first hear the word “AIDS”? In 1981 when I was a freshman at Lander University in Greenwood, South Carolina, a time when I had just started to explore life outside parental controls. Life’s vision was promising and I had great plans. This was also a time that I, and most people of color, didn’t think much of HIV or AIDS. Our nation’s health authorities presented this disease to the world as a white gay male disease. Therefore it was assumed there should have been no concern for other demographics of the population. Now the “gay” part is just something we have never dealt A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

with as a people very well. So the mixture of denial and non-white compatibility, along with other factors that contribute to our high disproportionate number of health disparities, made black people prime targets for HIV infection. Tell us about your experience of being diagnosed. I received my diagnosis while on active duty in the Armed Forces. After donating blood, I was notified of my HIV status by certified letter from the American Red Cross. My commander was the first person I consulted. She proved to be a great support during this horrifying time. She personally took me over to the infirmary to see the physician. Here is where I was told that my days were numbered, less than 200 days to be exact. From there, arrangements were made to send me to Walter Reed Army Medical Center for assessment and staging. There were no medications at that time. AZT was just being tested, and its side effects were too severe. How did you get through this traumatic period? Without my commander, I would have been lost. My commander was very helpful with getting me to and through the proper channels for notification and disclosure. Unlike civilians, disclosure to anyone close to you or any of your sex partners, along with receiving medical attention, was not an option. It was Army protocol. It was an embarrassing time. I felt so ashamed. As I look back Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m so thankful for how the military handled the situation. They literally saved my life. Had I been a civilian, I would have probably become a statistic. God was really taking care of me and FEBRUARY 2016 â&#x20AC;˘ A&U

How did you maintain your stamina and health while in the military? My commander and I developed a plan to maintain my normal routine. I was allowed to continue my job assignment. I didn’t want to be sitting somewhere depressed and waiting on death. All was going well and then my commander was replaced with the “Grim Reaper.” The “Grim Reaper”? My new commander was a young, white, arrogant, West Pointer who had

issues with me from day one. My previous commander allowed me to miss physical training at 5 a.m., due to my depression and difficulty sleeping. The deal was that I had to pass my physical training tests, which I did. After the new commander took charge things drastically changed. Early one morning around 5:07 a.m. I was awakened to a voice screaming over the top of me, “Who the fuck do you think you are?” “You are not special!” “Get your ass up and get in my formation now, soldier!” This type of harassment from my commander continued in various capacities for about two weeks.

What happened after two weeks? I had to get away from that maniac! I packed a few things and checked into Walter Reed Army Medical Center. Once I arrived at the hospital and explained to the authorities in the Infectious Diseases Department what was going on, they intervened. My commander was notified about my whereabouts. A psychologist, psychiatrist, infectious disease specialist, and myself made a conference call to him. His derogatory statements and threats toward me during that notification caused the hospital to authorize my reassignment to Walter Reed Army Medical Center for my care and well being. It’s sad to know that almost twenty-nine A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

photo courtesy Watchful Eye

like a fool I was fighting him tooth and nail for a minute.

Left: Bishop-designate Stacey Latimer at World AIDS Day 2015 at Brooklyn Borough Hall, Brooklyn; top: “Turning the Tide Together” group on steps of church, 2012 International Conference on AIDS in Washington, D.C. There were even physicians and nurses that would not engage us. So much was unknown and unpredictable at the time. There was still fear that the virus was airborne. How did you deal with the profound rejection? I, and it seems the others, made the best of a bad situation as we continued life there in the ward. I have to admit that even in the midst of our despair there were some times filled with great laughter and fun. It was here that I was afforded the blessed opportunity of sitting with the sick, being the messenger of last words, and holding the hands of a few friends as they made transition. It was here at Walter Reed Medical Center that my HIV/ AIDS ministry was born.

photo by William Graham

years later some of that same harassment exists in the Armed Forces today. What ensued while you were at Walter Reed? I was placed on a ward already stigmatized and known as the “AIDS Ward.” This ward was initially used for the terminally ill who were able to care for themselves. Over time, it overflowed with HIV and AIDS patients. We clung to life and formed strong bonds amongst ourselves. HIV stigma caused people to be separated from their families, friends, and colleagues. In many cases, families had been notified and mothers, fathers, siblings, and ministers were unresponsive to the sick and the dying. FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

At this time there were no viable medications. How did you care for yourself ? Mental health became my first line of defense. Since the first week of my diagnosis, mental hygiene has been a major factor in keeping me on track. I believe as a people, if we would rid ourselves of the untruths surrounding mental health, we could take advantage of a resource that would resolve so many of our ills. What have you learned from your challenging experiences? My journey has taught me something profound: No matter who you are, one of the most challenging tasks that any individual will face along the way is authentically being who they are without fear or regret.

HIV became the instrument by which so many opportunities for growth and transformation became available. This knowledge has given me what I needed to learn to love and respect all of who I am as a person, as a man. What have you found is the most essential component in this fight? Treatment. Treatment is prevention. HIV is one hundred-percent preventable if proper prevention methods and best practices are followed. As for a person who is HIV, adequate healthcare and proper drug regimen adherence will suppress the level of the virus in the bloodstream. Consistency in such responsible behavior over time drastically reduces an HIV-infected person’s chance of transmitting HIV to someone else. Your life is devoted to the AIDS community…. I made a promise to God at Walter Reed Army Medical Center that if he allowed me to survive I wanted him to use me to make a difference. I remember what those early days were like. I know people need support. I also know how much hate is within the community, blocking access to important lifesaving and life-changing resources, as so many people are still dying in catastrophic proportions unnecessarily. Every life is worth saving. Black Lives Matter! For more information about Love Alive International Sanctuary of Praise Worship Center, log on to: www. laisanctuaryofpraise.org. Dann Dulin is a Senior Editor of A&U.

lifeguide

Exchange Change federal needle exchange funding could reduce hep c rates

grant to provide outreach to people with substance abuse disorders, maybe we can use this to fund a counselor at the syringe exchange program,’” Raymond says. But because there are no new dollars attached by Congress, states will have to move money around, maybe from HIV testing money, for example. Or they could wait until it’s time to renew their grants. Scott County’s wakeup call In the U.S., HIV rates associated with injection drug use declined substantially over the last twenty years. But the number of new cases of HCV has been rising as more opioid users began injecting the drugs. Last year Indiana was ground zero in the new wave of infections from IV drug use. Almost 200 people were diagnosed with HIV and HCV in the rural community of Scott County, largely due to residents sharing needles to get high with Opana, also known as oxymorphone, which became the drug of choice for a heroin-like high after OxyContin was changed in 2010 to make it more difficult to snort or inject. That outbreak was a wake-up call for lawmakers with districts similar to Scott County’s, largely rural or suburban. There is a new sense of urgency in addressing the IV drug use problem in the U.S. is coming from lawmakers who had previously opposed needle-exchange funding when drug use was a big city problem. The thinking goes, last year’s opioid-based crisis in Scott County could be this year’s crisis in Anywhere County, USA. In fact it was two powerful Kentucky Republicans, House Appropriations Chair Hal Rogers and Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell, both previously staunch opponents to federal needle-exchange funding, who pushed to end the funding ban in large part, they admit, because of the HIV and HCV crisis in

neighboring Indiana and the heroin epidemic nationwide. Rep. Rogers told National Public Radio that his district has seen the impact of unsafe needles. “In my own district, we’ve have a severe problem with OxyContin abuse and overdose deaths, and I’ve been in those emergency rooms and seen these young people die of overdose of OxyContin and other opioids. But now it’s shifting toward heroin. And that brings us to a different problem. And that is needles are used. We’ve got a needle problem.” A bigger boost to HCV prevention? Raymond tells A&U that preventing HCV that becomes a bulwark against HIV infections. “Rates of new HIV infections attributable to injection drug use have been on the decline and are at their lowest point in the last twenty years. They are already trending in the right direction. HCV infections are going up. If we can reverse that trajectory, if we can bend that curve, it will be easier to show an impact on HCV faster.” Larry Buhl is a radio news reporter, screenwriter, and novelist living in Los Angeles. His podcast on employment issues, “Labor Pains,” can be found at www.laborpainspodcast.com. A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

illustration by Timothy J. Haines

fter nearly three decades of entrenched opposition to funding programs that allow drug users to obtain free sterile syringes, the U.S. Congress in January finally unlocked access to the federal funding, giving states that receive federal treatment money more options for preventing HIV and hepatitis C. There’s a catch. The money can’t go toward the needles, but for everything else that a needle exchange relies on: bigger costs like staff salaries, transportation and facilities. Daniel Raymond is policy director for the Harm Reduction Coalition, an organization that helps communities establish and expand needle exchanges. He’s been advocating for this change in law for many years and he told A&U the new policy is a compromise he can live with. “The funding ban has starved programs of access to resources. In some progressive environments, states and cities have contributed their own dollars and we have benefited from the generosity of private foundations. But the lack of access to federal funding means a huge stream of resources that has been completely cut off, and it’s left these programs with a precarious position.” Raymond points out that states go through budget fluctuations. During the last recession, many states cut back on health budgets, leaving syringe exchange programs vulnerable to cuts, without the anchor of federal funds to fall back on. He also says that the CDC got the message over the years that Congress didn’t like these federal needle exchanges and therefore took a hands-off approach to exchanges. It was barely mentioned in the last National HIV/AIDS strategy. “This has pushed these programs to the margins of the HIV response when we realize they should be integrated a part of a continuum.” Needle exchanges are not yet part of a broader continuum of harm reduction and there will be incremental changes starting with the modification of Congress’s policy. Raymond says that immediately health departments and community groups and states will have more options. “They can say, ‘we have this federal

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Barcelona Promise

As with Timothy Ray Brown, such a procedure is limited to those with life-threatening cancer, and is a dangerous and potentially fatal procedure of last resort. After the stem cell transplant that cured Timothy of both HIV and cancer, only trace HIV genetic material could be found in his body. Extensive research with highly sensitive assays have found no infectious or replicatively competent virus. Approximately one percent of the population carries the genetic mutation used in the two procedures which prevents HIV from entry cells most commonly infected by HIV. News of the “Barcelona Patient” comes on the heels of an announcement this past October by researchers at Spain’s National Organization of Transplants (ONT) to initiate a five-patient clinical trial aimed at recreating the results of Timothy’s procedure. In a news article, José María Moraleda, president of the Spanish Society of Hematology and Hemotherapy, stated about the project, “It will allow us to gain more knowledge about HIV and parallely offer us a potential option for curing a poorly diagnosed malignant hematological disease.” The study will utilize 157 donors with the CCR5 mutation and will attempt to

cure the five participants of both cancer and HIV over the course of the threeyear study. A similar but much less invasive approach in HIV-positive individuals who are not suffering from cancer, is currently being studied by Sangamo BioSciences. A clinical trial was announced last March where stem cells are removed from the body and modified with zinc finger nucleases that disrupt the CCR5 gene expression, potentially making these cells resistant to HIV. As the modified cells reproduce, the number of HIV- resistance cells are hoped to grow, preventing the virus from infecting a large number of cells. Research on zinc finger nucleases in CD4 cells has previously showed some protective benefit in treated CD4’s against HIV infection. The new study will recruit individuals with suppressed viral replication, but who have not seen an adequate immune restoration. Jeannie Wraight is the former editor-in-chief and co-founder of HIV and HCV Haven (www.hivhaven.com) and a blogger and writer for TheBody. com. She is a member of the Board of Directors of Health People, a community-based organization in the South Bronx and an advisor to TRW (Teach me to Read and Write), a community-based organization in Kampala, Uganda. She lives with her husband in New York City. A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

illustration by Timothy J. Haines

esearch utilizing HIV-resistant cells in patients with both HIV and cancer is gaining momentum, in hopes of producing a population of cells resistant to the virus that causes AIDS. A new clinical trial and what may have been a successful procedure similar to the one that cured Timothy Ray Brown (formally known as the Berlin Patient) show that the use of donor CCR5-resistant cells may be a potential option for a small group of HIV- positive individuals. Whereas previous procedures to replicate the results achieved in Timothy have failed, researchers in Barcelona, Spain, achieved some success in transplanting cells from the umbilical cord of an individual who possesses the CCR5 delta 32 deletion (rendering him resistant to HIV infection), into a man with HIV and lymphoma. Prior to the procedure, doctors had attempted to treat the man’s aggressive lymphoma with numerous lines of radio-chemotherapy and an autologous transplant, but were unsuccessful. After failing to locate a suitable stem cell match, doctors attempted the procedure with blood from the umbilical cord containing the mutated CCR5 co-receptor gene. This procedure is similar to that performed on Timothy Ray Brown, the first man cured of HIV, although it should be noted that Timothy received a stem cell transplant instead of cells from an umbilical cord. According to researchers, after the procedure ultrasensitive assays were utilized to determine that plasma HIV DNA was undetectable and that CCR5-resistant CD4 cells expanded in number and were resistant to HIV infection. The man remained on antiretroviral therapy. Unfortunately, the thirty-seven-yearold man succumbed to lymphoma. This prevented researchers from long-term monitoring of viral reservoirs to determine if the amount of HIV in the reservoirs had decreased and if the man did indeed achieve a functional cure. However, doctors believe this research holds hope for future potential cures or remissions through the use of similar procedures.

new research looks at donor ccr5-resistant cells to help create a cure

AID OF

FILM

When AIDS Was Funny Directed by Scott Calonico AD&D Production, Ltd.

he dots just don’t connect when it comes to Ronald Reagan and the AIDS crisis. He and his wife, Nancy, had numerous gay friends, and he opposed California’s Proposition 6, which was aimed at keeping gays from teaching in the public schools. But Reagan “absolutely did not act fast enough to address AIDS, and he certainly was not as forthright and public as he should’ve been,” activist James Duke Mason observes. Mason, whose father was a top campaign aide for Reagan in 1980, doesn’t see him as a “devil”; many others do. “When AIDS Was Funny,” Scott Calonico’s documentary short, looks at the mishandling of the epidemic. The filmmaker/director has woven together audiotapes from three different press conferences (1982, 1983, and 1984) with still shots of patients with AIDS from the Bailey-Boushay House in Seattle. Reagan never appears in the film; like Godot, he is there but not there. The two main “actors” are journalist Lester Kinsolving and Deputy Press Secretary Larry Speakes, who play off each other. The conservative Kinsolving keeps trying to find out what the administration intends to do about the epidemic, while Speakes comes back at him with snarky and evasive remarks. “In other words, the White House looks on this as a great joke?” demands Kinsolving at one point. Speakes never really answers him then or at any other time: he just keeps making cracks, and the rest of the press corps keeps snickering, an ever-dutiful Greek chorus. The images of the patients provide a chilling counterpoint to these conferences.

The most poignant of the images is that of a man holding another man who’s wasting away in front of the camera. It is a Pieta for our times, with all the sorrow and compassion of Michelangelo’s sculpture; and it reminds us that the latter is what these conferences were lacking. For more information about the film, log on to: www.scottcalonico.com. —T.J. Banks

BOOKS

My Name is Lucy Barton by Elizabeth Strout Random House

n her short but stunning new novel, My Name Is Lucy Barton, Elizabeth Strout returns to one of her strengths, her beautifully drawn and fully realized female protagonists. It isn’t that she writes her male characters badly—the Pulitzer Prize-winner writes nothing badly—but more that her female ones become so dear to us by the end of her books. And, not only are the two main characters here female, they are a mother and daughter with a less-than-easy relationship, another theme explored by Strout in the past, especially in her moving piece Amy and Isobelle. The relationship’s resolution, although unusual, is the main premise of the book. This novel takes place entirely in a hos-

pital room where Lucy Barton, aspiring writer and mother of two, is recovering from a serious post-operative infection. Lucy has triumphed over a a difficult childhood of abject poverty and bad parenting. Abuse is inferred, but never spoken of clearly. She has built a successful life and family for herself regardless of this rough start. The mother with whom Lucy has a distant and strained relationship suddenly appears, called on by Lucy’s husband, and parks herself in a chair at the foot of Lucy’s bed for a week. They’ve barely spoken in years. Her mother is a seemingly cold and difficult woman, but Strout imbues her with a humanity that often redeems her. The story is set during the early eighties in New York City’s West Village and takes place in a hospital, so Lucy is a frequent observer of the AIDS crisis. A difficult childhood and a tough mother have made Lucy a sensitive person and a compassionate observer of the gay community and its decimation. In fact, Strout has made AIDS and its impact on a community almost an ancillary character in this novel. The dying but brave men walking her neighborhood and isolated in the hospital affect Lucy deeply. As a young man in New York just a few years later than the when the novel is set, I observed and knew some of these same men. Strout writes of them so evocatively that I can’t help but think she does so from personal experience. AIDS is not the central theme of this novel, but it provides an important piece of the background and Lucy’s response to the crisis tells us much about its main character. —John Francis Leonard T. J. Banks is the author of Sketch People, A Time for Shadows, Catsong, Houdini, and other books. Catsong was the winner of the 2007 Merial Human-Animal Bond Award. John Francis Leonard has enjoyed a lifelong love of books. A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

photo courtesy S. Calonico

E R U T L U C S THE

Bringing hearts together since 1998

P zMatch.c m

A Calendar of Events

f winter has slowed you down to a standstill and you need a little inspiration, check out Pure Motion, an evening of dance performances from choreographer Ray Mercer. A ongoing cast member of Disney’s The Lion King for thirteen years and winner of Joffrey Ballet’s Choreographers of Color Award, Mercer infuses his dance pieces with artistry and social consciousness. In demand, he has found time to create work for the New Jersey Ballet, the Pensacola Ballet, Dallas Black Dance Theatre, Philadanco and Ailey II, and perform as a guest artist for the Boston Ballet. A longtime and steadfast supporter of Broadway Cares, Mercer has won the best onstage presentation award seven times at the nonprofit’s annual Gypsy of the Year and Easter Bonnet competitions. Pure Motion, which is being

produced by and benefitting Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS, will offer two performances of seven contemporary pieces, including one premiere created especially for the event, and brought to life by some of New York’s best and brightest dancers. Broadway Cares provides vital grants to organizations across the U.S. It recently awarded grants to more than 100 food service organizations through Project: Food Grants, which provides for the nutritional needs of individuals living with HIV/AIDS and other life-threatening illnesses. Date: February 29; time: 7 p.m. and 8:30 p.m.; The Ailey Citigroup Theatre, 405 West 55th Street, New York, New York; tickets: $40–$250.Of special note: VIP ticket buyers for the second performance will enjoy a private reception with Mercer and the cast following the 8:30 p.m. performance. For ticket information, log on to: http:// broadwaycares.org/puremotion2016.

A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

something reassuring and healing. That’s what I mean by connection, being there for each other. I’ve trained a lot of therapists. Ultimately, it’s [about] sitting there in a chair… you could be talking about the weather, and somehow that could be effective, because [as a therapist] you might be the only person that that person can talk to. And it’s something very profound about it.” While February is the month of chocolates, flowers, love, romance and Valentines, when it comes to matters of love, Dr. Fawcett advises people, especially those in recovery from drug, meth abuse, to “give yourself a Valentine. I think we can’t love anybody until we love ourselves. That’s where the healing starts.” For more information about the work of David Fawcett, meth addiction, and to purchase the book, visit www.david-fawcett.com. His website also features many resources for support, including Crystal Meth Anonymous: www.crystalmeth.org. Alina Oswald is Arts Editor of A&U.

In a candid conversation with Jones, Vanzant drew circles representing and connecting Jones, his ex-wife, the men he had affairs with, and other members of the family. She emphasized the effects his actions had on others and urged a sobbing Jones to confess all to Tiffany—who would later have her own tearful on-screen moment. “Tell the truth about what you did,” Vanzant insisted. “Speak on your own pain, and that is what gives people permission to stand in theirs. The truth will set you free. You think this is your business? This is God’s business.” Set Free Previously, “I preached that it was sin because I wrestled with it myself,” Jones said. And now: “My spirituality is a lot different.” “Because my faith was settled, I was able to become the gay person I’ve always been,” Jones said. “My faith is what drives my action.” Many of Jones’ former flock did not understand his new spirituality, a spirituality in which he no longer sees homosexuality as a sin. “Nobody gets up and walks out,” Jones said, but some parishioners privately told him they would leave his church. Some asked questions and tried to understand—but “their actions speak because you don’t see them

again.” In a small town where people are not well-traveled or learned, Jones said, what they have heard about homosexuality is from Christian TV that has a “black and white” perspective the does not speak of inclusion. For an LGBT person, Jones says, that fosters the perception that “it must just be you.” But now Jones knows that is not the case, and he strives to live an authentic life. And he encourages others to do the same. After his appearance on Iyanla: Fix My

Life, a lot of people reached out to him. They were “conflicted in their faith and had lots of questions.” Does God love me? Am I going to hell? Am I gonna go to heaven? As an advice columnist, Jones does not want to simply say what he thinks but to encourage those who seek his guidance to consider their own opinions and values—otherwise, “you’re walking in my truth” rather than your own. Jones plans to share his own truth in a book called Coming Out: the Journey to Authenticity, which will include biographical and self-help elements. In addition to sharing stories from Jones’ life, the book will discuss principles he applies to living an authentic life. He hopes readers will “find something they can apply to their own lives.” “Being gay is a small part of who I am, but my focus is for people just to be themselves and do what they were meant to do,” Jones said. “To be you, to do you, and to be successful—successful, meaning to please yourself, and authentic, meaning true to yourself—that’s the real message that I want to convey, and it just happens that I’m a gay man.” Stevie St. John interviewed HIV advocate Precious A. Jackson for this issue. A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

Jones photo by Stanz Eyez Photography

continued from page 41

David Fawcett continued from page 33

Pastor Jones

and make a connection, [that’s] really the first step [they have to take], because the healing part about this is being connected.” And that connection better be a healthy one. “It’s so sad…sometimes [patients] meet people on Scruff or Grindr and don’t know [these people’s] last names,” he comments, explaining that that is not a support system. Finding that support network, and that healthy connection could be tough, but it’s important to try to reach out. “That’s why the twelvestep groups are so important. You can just show up. Being connected to a larger group of people who have a shared experience is really important.” Dr. Fawcett further comments that a support group can be beneficial in many ways—it can help those in recovery stay on track, and rationalize. “There’s something magical about the group that really is very powerful.” That human connection is important. “I think it’s something about being human,” Dr. Fawcett says, “I think we need that. It’s

FEBRUARY 2016 • A&U

Survival Guide

[a portrait by sean black]

Belkis Fonseca Medina

“‘Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts,’ Winston Churchill said. I sourced the courage to continue from the love I felt for all humanity, ill or not ill; love and faith is what we need to continue, and if it is in community….even better.”

A chemical engineer and university professor from Havana, Cuba, Belkis, fifty-five, was diagnosed with HIV in 2001 and it was a life-changing event. Helping with prevention efforts and supporting the communities in celebrating this new life has been her calling.

Sean Black is a Senior Editor of A&U. 64

A&U • FEBRUARY 2016

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97429-479-1015

Our HIV-specialized pharmacists offer personalized counseling to help you stay on track with your medications. They are also trained on therapies for hepatitis C and other conditions that can affect you now and in the years ahead. To learn more, visit HIV.Walgreens.com.