debate issue 8, 2011 by Debate Magazine

issue 8 2011

www.ausm.org.nz

issue 08 2011

ISSUE 08 2011 5 Editorial 6 Letters 7 News 9 UniGames Photos 10 Sport 11 How To/Recipe

on the cover

12 Pres Sez/AuSM Update 13 Sequels Debate

14 Labour: The Next Contender 15 NZ’s Dirty Little Secret

Hayley Burrows and Matthew Cattin argue whether Hollywood should ban sequels

Untitled by Angel Guanlao

editor

Samantha McQueen samantha.mcqueen@aut.ac.nz

designers

Deanne Antao Nonavee Dale

sub-editor Alisha Lewis

contributors

advertising contact

Kate Campbell kate.campbell@aut.ac.nz

Danny Nemani busts myths about burning fat

This publication is entitled to the full protection given by the Copyright Act 1994 (“the Act”) to the holders of the copyright, being AUCKLAND STUDENT MOVEMENT AT AUCKLAND UNIVERSITY OF TECHNOLOGY INCORPORATED (“AuSM”). Reproduction, storage or display of any part of this publication by any process, electronic or otherwise (except for the educational purposes specified in the Act) without express permission is a break of the copyright of the publisher and will be prosecuted accordingly. Inquiries seeking permission to reproduce should be addressed to AuSM.

disclaimer

Material contained in this publication does not necessarily represent the views or opinions of AuSM, its advertisers, contributors, PMP Print or its subsidiaries.

debate is a member of

Alisha Lewis looks at our shocking child abuse history

16 Home Hobbiting

Danielle Whitburn explains why Aucklanders aren’t leaving the nest

17 Death By Auto-tune 18 Laying Down The Law Alisha Lewis looks at the new copyright law

20 Transport Diaries 22 James Franco Q&A 23 Royal Wedding Hysteria 24 Columns 25 Tom Hanks Is Your Father 26 Agony Aunt/Words of the Week 27 Suggestions/Horoscopes 28 Fashion Heather Rutherford interviews shoe designer Kathryn Wilson

printer

PMP Print Ltd.

29 Reviews

debate magazine is brought to you by

• 10% permanent student discount* • We buy and sell second-hand textbooks* - instant cash if you sell • Over 100,000 books in stock* - no waiting weeks for books to arrive • Four stores Auckland wide • Open Monday to Friday or buy securely from our website 24/7

www.ubsbooks.co.nz www.ausm.org.nz

City Campus Phone 366 4550 Fax 366 4570 Email aut.city@ubsbooks.co.nz

Akoranga Campus Phone 489 6105 Fax 489 7453 Email aut.akoranga@ubsbooks.co.nz

issue 08 2011

directory reception

was 12 when I downloaded my first song illegally. I was relatively late to the P2P boat, having missed the whole Napster era because my computer was still trying to connect to dial up. I can’t remember the exact song that was just soooooo great I had to have, but it was probably something ultra “hip” like Ashanti, R Kelly or Avril Lavigne. With the speeds that our internet was wheezing along at, it would take a week to compile one mixed CD of songs, so my five finger digital discount didn’t happen at the lightning speeds kids today operate at. There was no iTunes back then, and even if there was, who would give a 12-year-old a credit card to digitally swipe and purchase songs to their heart’s content? Not that I had money to begin with. In fact, my first job would have seen me make smoothies and salads for five hours at a measly $8 an hour to afford one CD. I hadn’t even thought of downloading movies or television shows onto my computer. For starters, it probably would have taken a month to download, and back then there was no such thing as “spoilers”. I could happily watch Desperate Housewives on a Monday night after school knowing that my Bebo page wouldn’t be filled with comments about what had just happened in the states. Seven years ago, I planned my days around what was on television. These days, thanks to MySky and the internet, I can catch up when I have a spare moment. It’s not hard to get left behind or to have your favourite show ruined, thanks to New Zealand television’s schedule. We might only be a week behind in Glee and American Idol, but we’re still six months behind Brothers and Sisters and The Big Bang Theory, a year behind How I Met Your Mother and two years behind America’s Next Top Model and Friday Night Lights! No wonder people turn to other means. The reason downloading has become such a hot topic lately is all thanks to a new copyright bill the government passed into law under urgency last month. The government has taken it upon themselves to act like big brother and will watch our internet usage to make sure everyone isn’t helping themselves to movies, music and television shows on the internet. Needless to say, it’s caused some controversy among our generation (see page 18 for our feature on the bill). Everyone has different opinions on what counts as “stealing” when it comes to internet downloads and I can’t see how the government is going to be able to properly enforce this new law. I share my internet usage with the rest of my flat and while I don’t download, a couple of my flatmates do. To add to that, the account is in our landlord’s name, so how can they pinpoint exactly who the culprit is? It’s the same with families with technology savvy children, people stupid enough not to lock their wifi and the thousands of others in flatting situations around the country. If iTunes had episodes available for a few bucks here as they do in the US I will gladly pay for my favourite shows each week. Not everyone will share the same view as me, but even if 10 per cent adopted the pay method, that would be a lot more money for the producers. That’s all it comes down to in the end – money. I understand that copyright theft is a growing problem and needs to be tackled, but the solution they’ve come up with doesn’t seem like it’s going to solve the problem.

City Campus Level 2, WC Building 921 9805 8am-5pm Mon-Thurs 8am-4pm Fri North Shore Campus Level 2, AS Building 921 9949 8.30am-3pm Mon-Fri Manukau Campus MB107 921 9999 ext 6672 9am-3.30pm Mon-Thurs

management

Sue Higgins General Manager 921 9999 ext 5111 sue.higgins@aut.ac.nz

representation

Veronica Ng Lam AuSM Student President 921 9999 ext 8571 vnglam@aut.ac.nz

advocacy

Nick Buckby Liaison Manager 921 9999 ext 8379 nick.buckby@aut.ac.nz

marketing/events

Rebecca Williams Marketing Manager 921 9999 ext 8909 rebecca.williams@aut.ac.nz

advertising

Kate Campbell Marketing & Sales Coordinator 921 9999 ext 6537 kate.campbell@aut.ac.nz

media

Samantha McQueen Publications Co-ordinator 921 9999 ext 8774 samantha.mcqueen@aut.ac.nz

sports

Melita Martorana Sports Team Leader 921 9999 ext 7259 melita.martorana@aut.ac.nz

vesbar

Zane Chase Vesbar Manager 921 9999 ext 8378 zane.chase@aut.ac.nz For a full list of contact details plus profiles of AuSM staff & student executive and information on clubs visit:

www.ausm.org.nz

Letter of the week wins two movie tickets for Event Cinemas!

Letter of the week:

Dear Alisha

In response your article on sizeism last issue, I would like to make it a point that sizeism is in now way on equal footing with real discrimination such as sexism or racism. Your race and your sexuality are never a concious decision, you are born that way. There is nothing you can do to change that, and discrimination based on these is outright wrong because they are not judgements of character. I’m not sure how you so easily passed this up in your little rant, but last I checked, heart disease is highest cause of death in Western countries. It is NOT NORMAL to be over, or underweight, and people should be encouraged to maintain a healthy lifestyle. Does your opinion of someone differ whether they are a chain smoker or not? The two are very similar, but NZ society is a lot harsher to smokers than they are on overweight people. Sure, genetics means some people are larger than others, and discrimination based on pure appearance can never be justified, but I seriously think you are downplaying a very serious issue in today’s society. We should NOT be teaching people that it’s okay to be overweight, and that discriminaton against fat people is the same as against homosexuals or certain races. Ricky Gervais put it very well: http://www. youtube.com/watch?v=LIix5bh8n1g M.

squash tennis hockey touchrugby wheelchairrugby

debate letters policy: Letters need to make it into debate’s mailbox before Wednesday, 3pm each week for the following issue. You must give us your name when submitting letters to be eligible for letter of the week, but you can use a pseudonym for publication if you wish. Any letters longer than 250 words may be subjected to editing. Spelling and grammar will not be corrected. The editor reserves the right to decline without explanation. Most importantly, the views contained on the letters page do not necessarily represent the views of AuSM. Send your letters to debate@aut.ac.nz or if you want to kick it old school, PO Box 6116, Wellesley St, Auckland.

aware that the danger to it is that I may be unable to memorize the lyrics when the prompter and the booklet are taken away from me. If I was watching a movie or TV, I need subtitles, partly people who aren’t watching the TV are having their own conversation. Even in English, where you are exposed to so many Dear Ashleigh & Ben accents is not easy. For example, I would love Because I am from Hong Kong, where almost it if The Jeremy Kyle Show will be subtitled. every TV program, every music show, music They may talk very fast, bicker and swear a lot videos and the news are subtitled or captioned in their north-eastern accents, but I can’t try to without the need for Teletext across three understand their real issues or concerns if I can’t languages, I am still having ‘subtitle withdrawal understand what they say. syndrome’, even after almost 15 years! It hardly Is there any danger to us relying on subtitles ever gets distracting even if I was watching a too much when we watch TV programs? Sure. In subtitled action film. But I guess it all depends on a live concert, if you sing the words wrong, the what you are listening to and watching. subtitle writer will also get it wrong. In TV shows In terms of music, I hung out in CD stores a lot and movies, especially in English films translated before Sounds and ECM folded. Even now, when I back to Chinese, some translations and spellings borrow a CD from the library (not vinyls. Nothing are so far off the mark. Having known that fact, against it, but they are as fragile as fine china), the when I’m the one learning another language, I first thing I do after I put on my earphones was sometimes take the subtitles and translations with to read to the lyrics book, even to songs I already a grain of salt. know. Other than looking at the pictures and Who said one can relax to a movie or a CD? No, maybe to collect those limited edition souvenirs not me, not I. so one day I’ll get their autographs, I want to learn But whether it would be better if we were in a the songs so I can understand how the correct bar and our conversation is subtitled, I wanted it lyrics are written as they are being ‘read’ to me, or too, but then there is the ‘live chat syndrome’. To to check whether I’ve misheard any words (crucial be continued... in other languages, even in Mandarin, which I Rocky speak because of various homonyms). But I am

PS: I am male and I am underweight, and I blame no one except myself for my physical condition. The fact I’m constantly reminded that this is not healthy is good, because it gives me motivation to improve my own health.

fencing netball rowing basketball wakaama

issue 08 2011

Bald heads winter’s hottest fashion trend

AUT plays host to 2011 Uni Games by Vaughan Alderson

by Jessica Beresford

Bald heads will be more common around campus this semester as university students shear their locks to raise money and awareness for cancer. Shave for a Cure is an annual event that began in 1999 and helps fundraise for the Leukemia and Blood Foundation (LBF). Participants shave their heads to raise money and show empathy for cancer patients who have lost their hair during treatment. One of the teams, Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch, has raised more than $3000 and the total is still rising as people reach into their pockets.

Team member and AUT student Oliver Church has shaved his head, and raised more than $200 for cancer by himself. “I psyched myself up to do it after wanting to for the last couple of years,” he says. Church was a little anxious at first but says he needed the haircut anyway. One of the girls in the team, Karla Rickards, was nervous but knew it was for a good cause. “I saw all the boys were doing it and I knew a whole lot more money would be raised if there was a girl on the team,” the University of Auckland student says. Friends and family donated over $1000 for Rickards to shave off her curls. “I had second thoughts at first but once you start raising that sort of money there’s no way you can back out.” LBF does not receive government funding, so it aims to get 10,000 people to shave their heads and raise money for the 10,000 New Zealanders currently suffering from blood cancers and other related conditions.

NZ finishes 10th in world wheelchair rugby comp by Cameron Leslie A New Zealand development team finished 10th in the world’s biggest wheelchair rugby tournament held in Germany on April 15-17. The team, dubbed Te Waka Hou, included two of AUT’s own, Cameron Leslie and Tainafi Lefono. While disappointed to finish winless Leslie, 21, and Lefono, 25, remain upbeat and say the tournament has been valuable. “The tournament has shown us that we need to lift our game considerably. Being in New Zealand we often only have each other to play against so we think we’re better than we really are,” said Leslie. They were unlucky to finish winless after pushing the tournament favourite to within one goal. Lefono says there were opportunities to secure a win but inexperience caused the team to fall behind and could never claw their way back. “We need to learn from our mistakes here, go back home and work hard on the little things that let us down. “In the end the purpose of the trip was to learn and develop and that’s exactly what we’ve done,” said Lefono.

www.ausm.org.nz

Hundreds of competitors gathered on the North Shore on Tuesday last week for the official opening ceremony of the Super City Uni Games. AUT’s sport and fitness centre at the North Shore campus welcomed competitors and officials with a traditional Maori p¬owhiri. Around 1100 students from 15 universities participated in the games, including students from the Australian Catholic University. AUT boasted 234 competitors, more than double any other university’s contribution. Special thanks were given to Canterbury and Lincoln universities for sending competitors despite the recent earthquake disaster in Christchurch. The ceremony was hosted by ZM’s Mark Dye and featured guest speaker Sir John Walker, former gold medallist runner for New Zealand. Walker gave a motivating speech to the young athletes encouraging them to follow their dreams and achieve greatness. “If you go through life not using your talent you will regret it for the rest of your life,” he said. “Because time goes by so fast.” Photos of the Games are on page 8-9. The full list of winners for the Super City Uni Games are available on the AuSM website.

Disability Resource Service The Disability Resource Service offers information and a range of services for Deaf and disabled students, including: •

Advice on scholarships, grants and funding

•

Information and advice regarding specific learning disabilities, assessments and supports

•

Assistance to access specialist equipment or software

•

Study materials in alternative formats

•

In-class and examination supports

•

Access to designated parking areas

(09) 921 9999 extension 8262 (09) 921 9999 extension 7778

disability.office@aut.ac.nz www.aut.ac.nz/student_services/disability

AUT lose out on Waka Ama by a gold in nose by Alexander Winkler

in twenty20

cricket

by Vaughan Alderson

The AUT Titans added another gold to their collection on Thursday after literally taking the cricket by storm. Heavy rain and bad ground conditions forced the event to move indoors to Planet Sports in Glenfield. Though the venue was changed, attitudes did not. Players and supporters alike enjoyed their day of cricket. Not all participants took the event so seriously, including a wise-cracking umpire with a microphone. Although AUT B were unable to take a win from the two day competition AUT A remained undefeated, winning a total of eight consecutive matches. Their climb to the top did not always look so certain as some games came within one point of defeat, including a near-loss to Unitec in the seventh round. The Titans faced Auckland in the final but could not be stopped on their way to the top and were declared the Uni Games champions.

1. What natural disaster tore through seven US states last week, killing at least 259 people?

4. Who is the new Act leader, replacing Rodney Hide?

a) b) c) d)

Tsunami Tornado Floods Volcano Eruption

2. Auckland Blues player Kurtis Haiu has stopped playing rugby indefinitely after announcing what? a) b) c) d)

He has bone cancer in one of his ribs He pulled his left hamstring He was moving to England to raise a family He has a broken wrist

3. Which band is Matt Bellamy the lead singer of? a) b) c) d)

Kings of Leon Band of Horses The National Muse

The AUT Titans have emerged victorious as the undefeated champions of the Uni Games Rugby Sevens on Wednesday. The competition was turned into a one-day double round-robin after the Waiariki Institute of Technology withdrew, leaving only three teams. After scoring 129 points and conceding only 20 in four games, the AUT Titans emerged as the clear winners. The wet and muddy conditions did not seem to faze AUT as ball control was very much in their favour. Line breaks were all too easy and the Titan’s ball control made the opposition look unprepared. Much of the Titan’s success is owed to their captain, Theo Hermans, a representative player for North Harbour. Hermans was very pleased with his team’s effort saying that they “put them away easy”. While the competition was not on the same level Hermans is used to, he said he enjoyed the day anyway. “I think the unique factor about Uni Games is the social aspect. It’s a cool chance to mix with your uni mates in a different arena than just the classroom.” Auckland representative player, Rocky Khan, also wore the AUT jersey on Wednesday. Khan also said the competition was not what he was used to but admits he enjoyed the day too. “There’s a good bunch of boys here,” Khan said. Hermans said he has national level sevens in his sights. Khan, however, just wants to get his sport and recreation degree “out of the way”.

John Banks Diane Foreman Winston Peters Don Brash

8. What is the chemical symbol for Sodium? a) b) c) d)

Sd So Na K

5. What is the capital of Cambodia?

9. Who did the Breakers play on Friday night at North Shore Events Centre?

a) b) c) d)

Phnom Penh Prey Veng Koh Kong Thmar Puok

6. What county was Kate Middleton born in? a) b) c) d)

Surrey Wiltshire Berkshire Dorset

7. Which New Zealand city had parts of it evacuated last week after flooding and slips? a) b) c) d)

by Vaughan Alderson

Christchurch Whangarei Hawkes Bay Whakatane

Sydney Kings Cairns Taipans Perth Wildcats Melbournce Tigers

10. Which US billionaire is considering running in the next presidency elections? a) b) c) d)

Mark Zuckerberg Bill Gates Warren Buffet Donald Trump

Answers: B, A, D, D, A, C, C, C, B, D

ld AUT takes go

AUT caught the attention of the National Olympic Committee with a silver medal performance at Uni Games last week. After a clear 2008 win in Rotorua - the last time Waka Ama was part of Uni Games - AUT was an odds-on favourite. AUT students Brad Anderson and Phillis Meti, both New Zealand national representatives in Waka Ama, were part of the winning team in 2008. They knew it was going to be a difficult race against the paddlers from the University of Auckland and Waiariki Institute of Technology. The Waiariki team had one Olympian and another five national paddlers in their canoe. In the end it is a clear win over all races for the Waiariki team, beating AUT in the 200m sprint by a nose. After the medal ceremony, New Zealand Olympic committee member and former Olympian swimmer Danyon Loader congratulated the teams. He also uses the moment to promote the campaign for the 2012 London Olympic Games. “What better start is there as with motivated sports people at the Uni Games,” he said.

ed at Sevens AUT undefeat

issue 08 2011

Photo by Vaughan Alderson

d Kyle Richmon All photos by rwise. he ot ed at st unless

Photo by Vaughan Alderson www.ausm.org.nz

Photo by Vaughan Alderson

Dude. Perfect by Scott Moyes

We always claim that sport isn’t what it used to be. Gone are the days of true grit, determination and pride. We’re always told that the heroes of yesteryear were 10 times the man of any sport star today. “Colin Meads,” we’ll say. “He walked 25 miles to training each day in his bare feet with the rain coming down like Niagara Falls.” You’ll never shut up Richie Benaud about his cricketing era, back when a strike rate of 30 made you a scoring sensation. Sport has supposedly been replaced by glitz and glamour. It’s no longer about the hard yards you ran in torrential rain and a pool of mud. Everything is a highlights reel. Franchises must consider which players are going to steal the show with blockbusting performances; the ones that are going to sell tickets and put bums in seats. As sports fans, it’s only natural to want bigger, faster and better. We want to see plays that will completely blow our minds that we can say to our mates before lectures on Monday morning, “dude, did you see the game on the weekend?” On Easter Sunday, the Breakers played the Cairns Taipans in game two of the final of the NBL. The Taipans are down by three points with just seconds to go in extra time. If they lose this match, their season is over. Then out of nowhere, from metres behind the arc, Ron Dorsey lands a three point shot to send the game into double extra time, eventually going on to win the match. It was quite remarkable to watch. But now the definition of remarkable is being pushed to new extremes with unbelievable feats that have many people scratching their heads. I’m talking about videos that appear to be home made, of people doing absolutely extraordinary things, usually sports-related. One such example is the new line of television adverts featuring the All Blacks in the backyard, where Ma’a Nonu practices hitting targets with a watermelon. There’s a wealth of these videos online, many going by the name of ‘Dude, Perfect’. All are nothing short of spectacular and most still have me bamboozled. Here are three of my favourites:

Roger Federer’s bottle skill shot:

World’s longest basketball shot:

NFL fantasy teams ad:

The thing is though, whether these videos are authentic or not, most of their achievements aren’t actually that far from what they’re doing on the field. To even contemplate that these amazing skills are real is a compliment to the sportsman’s ability. Our sporting stars of today may not walk 25 miles to training or get up at 4am to milk the cows, but they’re doing things that Colin Meads couldn’t have dreamt of in his day. It’s extremely easy to get caught up in the millions of dollars they’re getting paid and the life of luxury they lead. But in the end, they’re the ones who give us something to marvel at and aspire to. You can’t put a price on that.

In this video, we are told we are on location for a Gillette ad filming. Federer has an argument with one of the producers about the Hawk-eye ball prediction system he is renowned for hating. So Federer places a bottle on top of the producers head, and shoots it off with one of his 200kmph serves. If that ball connects with the producer’s forehead, he gets knocked out. All my instincts tell me this is fake, from the fact Gillette sponsors it to the over done home-made feel of the video. But every time I try to freeze the frame to the moment I see the tennis ball disappear from sight, I come up empty handed.

This one is really wicked. It’s basically a collaboration of videos of NFL players doing unbelievable things to prove they’re a cut above the rest so that you should choose them for your fantasy team. It includes Chris Cooley catching a ball through a wall, Mason Crosby kicking the ball to make the church bells chime and my personal favourite of Laurence Maroney jumping straight through two open windows of an SUV. Again it’s for an advert so it’s a little hard to believe. However again I can’t fathom how they possibly made it.

10.

This is from the fellows from ‘Dude Perfect’. It is a basketball shot taken from the third deck of the Texas A&M University Football Stadium. Out of the three, this one seems the most authentic. The ball never disappears from view and we get a view of two continuous shots at the end. He gets nothing but net. A perfect arc in the air and then swish.

issue 08 2011

by Alicia Crocket

Fat Burning

Serves 6 Gluten free if you make GF cheese sauce or buy GF cheese sauce mix Cost per serve: $1.50

by Danny Nemani

If you haven’t heard of moussaka it’s like a lasagne, but layered with potato instead of pasta. You can make it with meat, but I prefer the vegetarian version. Moussaka is traditionally made with eggplant but I’ve used slices of zucchini instead. I’ve added ingredients and instructions for making your own cheese sauce but you can just as easily buy a packet if you don’t want to make sauce.

Your body burns protein, fat or carbs depending on the intensity and length of your activity. You burn some fat even when you’re in couch potato mode. When it comes to losing weight, calories are calories; you have to burn more calories than you eat if you want to lose weight. Despite the simplicity of this message, there are still myths about burning fat.

Myth 1:

Low Intensity exercise like walking is better at fat burning than other high intensity exercise like running.

Truth:

This myth is kind of true because exercising at a lower intensity requires less quick energy and so a higher percentage of fat is burned. However, working at a lower intensity means that you’ll burn fewer calories than if you went hard out for the same amount of time. If your aim is to lose weight you want to burn as many calories as possible in the time you’re exercising. Burning a higher percentage of fat doesn’t mean you’re more likely to be lighter next time you step on the scales; it’s the total number of calories that will make the difference.

Myth 2:

Running, cycling, or other cardio activities are more ‘fat burning’ once you’ve been doing them for more than 15 or 20 minutes.

Truth:

Once again, there is an element of truth in this myth. Once you’ve been exercising for 15 or 20 minutes, your body changes to using a higher percentage of fat as its fuel. This is because the quick-energy carbohydrates are used up in the initial stages of exercise. BUT remember it’s the difference between how many calories you eat and how many calories you burn that determines whether you lose weight or not. Which fuel source you’re using doesn’t make any difference. So you might be using a greater proportion of fat for fuel but if you’re not burning those calories you’re not going to be losing any weight. Put another way, if burning as many calories as you can is the best way to lose weight, anyone can figure out which activity of the following is going to give the best results (answer: jogging and sprinting). So, despite what the myths say, if you want to lose weight it doesn’t matter whether you’re burning fat, protein or carbs. If you burn 250 calories every day from a short, fast jog, you’d see a bigger difference in weight and fat loss than if you walked everyday for the same amount of time. So take my advice and stop worrying so much about what sort of fuel your body is using and start concentrating on using more fuel than you are right now!

www.ausm.org.nz

Ingredients 2-3 large potatoes, sliced into 1cm rounds 2 zucchini, cut lengthwise into 1/2cm strips (optional for when in season) 1 cup brown lentils (or other legume) 2 bay leaves (optional) 1 Tbsp oil 1 onion 1 clove garlic, chopped OR 1 tsp minced garlic ½ tsp each of cinnamon and ground nutmeg 1 can chopped tomatoes with ¼ cup tomato paste OR 1 can pasta sauce 2 cups chopped vegetables (carrots, peas, capsicum, mushrooms, pumpkin, zucchini, cauliflower, celery) ¼ cup breadcrumbs Cheese sauce 2 Tbsps flour 2 Tbsps margarine, oil or butter 1-1½ cups of milk ½-¾ cup of grated cheese Directions 1. Wash the lentils and boil in water with the bay leaves added for 10 minutes 2. Prep the rest of your veges 3. Slice your potatoes and cook in boiling water for approximately 5 minutes until they are JUST starting to go soft. Rinse with cold water and put aside 4. While potatoes and the lentils are cooking cook the zucchini strips in a hot pan until they are just starting to go soft 5. Heat oil in a saucepan, sauté onion and garlic for a few minutes then add spices and salt and pepper to taste 6. Add chopped vegetables and tomatoes and the cooked lentils when they’re done and simmer for 10-20 minutes 7. Make cheese sauce a. Melt butter/margarine and add flour on a low heat and stir until it starts to go frothy b. Take the pan off the heat and some milk and stir/whisk until it starts to thicken c. Add more milk and return to the heat. You must keep stirring because otherwise it will go lumpy d. Keep adding milk and stirring until the sauce starts to boil and you have reached the desired consistency. The sauce will not get any thicker once it has boiled. You may not need all the milk so that’s why you don’t add it all at once e. When you’re happy with the consistency of the sauce, stir in the grated cheese. Don’t return the sauce to the heat no matter what. If the sauce gets too hot once the cheese has been added it will go stringy 8. Place half of the potatoes in the bottom of a casserole or baking dish 9. Sprinkle over the breadcrumbs 10. Add half the lentil/tomato mix 11. Put the zucchini slices over the top and the remaining lentil/tomato mix 12. Top with remaining potatoes and the cheese sauce 13. Cook for about 20 minutes or until the top has browned

11.

smoothly as possible. To AUT for their commitment to hosting the games with us and patience to deliver no matter what circumstance. To the AUT sports council for their guidance and input in breathing life into the games and imparting wisdom all the way through. To our club development officer Melita, you can begin to breathe a little as the hard work was hopefully paid off with some good results. To the event organisers and the fantastic volunteers – you were superb! To the coaches, managers family and friends – you guys rock! And last, but certainly not least, to the AUT Titans. Well done! I enjoyed representing our university in lawn bowls and the wheel chair rugby demonstration was a hit! There will be many highlights throughout the week and I hope all of you who participated enjoyed the games and played in fair play and good sportsmanship. As Margaret Thatcher once said: “The desire to win is born in most of us. The will to win is a matter of Veronica Ng Lam training. The manner of winning is a matter of honour.” So no matter what the results were Titans, WE ARE PROUD OF YOU! AuSM President Before I end, I would like to pay tribute to student associations around 921 9999 ext 8571 New Zealand, for USNZ is made up of your student associations and veronica.nglam@aut.ac.nz without them many of you would not have the opportunity to experience Welcome back to the last half of our first semester! this remarkable event. Uni Games, like many of our other services, is I trust some of you had enough time to relax and enjoy a little down time another example of how student initiatives have benefited students on before the final push to see this semester done and dusted. For those who a large scale. So make sure if you see your student president around give didn’t have any breaks either due to work, more assignments or just because, them a thumbs up as 2012 there will be some big changes for us. Do not fear this is the reality of student life. though as the student voice will be a voice that will we will always fight for Now as I write this blurb I am in great hope that we have hopefully reclaimed no matter what. our Uni Games title from 2005! AuSM was extremely proud to co-host the Once again I welcome you back to the last half of our first semester, I wish University Games in partnership with AUT and was also delighted to continue you well for this week; dress warm and remember to stay AuSM! sponsoring the AUT Titans! I want to thank University of Sport New Zealand Ia manuia (USNZ) for annually delivering the opportunity for tertiary students to come Your fellow president in solidarity together nationally and celebrate a core value of pure competitiveness. To the Auckland Council for their patience and allowance to see the games go as

Veronica

Free movie with snacks

You are all invited to the AuSM movie screenings, Your Highness (May 4) and Burke and Hare (May 11) at Event Cinemas, Queen Street. Seats are limited so you must RSVP to rebecca.williams@aut.ac.nz to come. Popcorn and drinks provided by AuSM!

Save money and win brownie points

We have more Entertainment Books in stock and they are flying out the door. Visit your nearest AuSM office to buy a copy for $65. It’s the perfect Mother’s Day gift!

Cheap trip

The AuSM Lodge is filling up fast so make sure you get online (www.ausm.org.nz) and book before it’s too late. The lodge is available year-round and sleeps up to 20 people at a time. You can rent the whole place from just $130 per night.

AGM – All students should attend at least one!

Monday, May 16 at 12pm. Lunch is provided and you could win a spot prize. Agenda includes president’s report, audited 2010 accounts and appointment of auditor. Don’t forget your student ID.

Pool comp kicking off soon

Email kyle.richmond@aut.ac.nz to sign up for the Vesbar pool comp happening every Wednesday from May 11. This year we have a snowboard up for grabs plus loads of other cool prizes. Entry is free.

Ready for round two?

Currently the AuSM events department is putting together your Re:Orientation for semester two. If you have some ideas or would like to volunteer to help during the event (starting July 18) please email: rebecca.williams@aut.ac.nz

Battle on

If you haven’t signed your band up for AuSM Battle of the Bands visit: www.ausm.org.nz. You could win a day at the Red Bull Studio, bar tabs and a slot at Orientation 2012!

The AuSM AGM will be held in the Marae on

This Week (May 02-06) MONDAY

12.

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY

FRIDAY

5 More AuSM events at www.ausm.org.nz

Join ausm1 on Facebook

issue 08 2011 Follow ausm1

Join ausm1 on Facebook

Like “ausm1” Follow ausm1

Follow “ausm1” on Twitter

Should sequels be banned in Hollywood? by Hayley Burrows No one ever sets out to see a bad movie, but it happens a lot; especially when there is a ‘2’ or ‘3’ after the title. Yet sequels are still being made. Hollywood has gone gaga over them over the last few years, spitting out sequels as if their drug problems depended on it. There’s a reason why the stars of the first film often don’t return for the sloppy seconds of a sequel and that’s because they know it sucks! If they do, their heart is never really in it. Sequels never really make it into the top box office hits, unless Harry Potter or Twilight is mentioned in the title. Sequels only ever work if their name is Toy Story. Now that is one movie franchise I would not F with. However, ever other sequel in the history of the world sucks! Why mess with a good thing? The first movie is where all the action is and often ends on a high that leaves its viewers happy and satisfied. Sex and the City anyone? Then the sequel comes around and destroys said movie. 112 minutes of nothing while the menopausal stars amble around a desert and try not to look so old. And how about Legally Blonde 2? I cringe just hearing the name. You couldn’t help but fall in love with Elle Woods in the first film, but in the second, all I wanted to do was hit her with that giant pink bag she carries around. The whole plot focused on her finding her dog, Bruiser’s, birth mother. Yes, that really is the plot. How about Oceans Twelve? How the heck did they get an all star cast to agree to this sequel, which is probably one of the worst of all time. The whole film is all inside jokes, including Julia Roberts impersonating Julia Roberts? They should have left it with the first one, but it is a mistake Hollywood keeps making, and probably always will. Sequels will never die, not when there is an ounce of money that can be made out of it. That’s why we have to put up with Scary Movie, Disaster Movie, Epic Movie and all those other Shit Movies on the cinema listings each year. It’s the only reason why all those Bring It On movies have been made, because seriously, how many times can you watch cheerleaders competing without repeating every storyline? Even Disney has been sucked into the vortex, with a whole range of straight-to-DVD sequels. I have to admit, I was excited to see the Mean Girls sequel but I had to walk out of the room during it. I found it so cringe worthy; even Lindsay Lohan would have turned the role down – and we all know she could probably use the money right now. One by one, sequels are slowly tearing apart the film industry. Why re-make something that you know is going to be bad, when there are hundreds of original stories just wanting to be told? Well kids, that’s because, Hollywood runs on one thing – money – and they sure are hell know how to get it. Scream icon Neve Campbell, sums it up best: “There are sequels and all theses prequels to all the sequels. It’s a terrible situation, it truly is. It makes me sad because there are so many great stories out there waiting to be told. Do you know an author pitching a book nowadays is asked to consider whether there’s a possibility of making a film from it? So films are even limiting the kinds of books we’ll be able to read.” There you have kids, Sequels suck.

Yes

www.ausm.org.nz

by Matthew Cattin What’s better than watching Marty McFly trying to fix the Delorean so he can go back to the future? Watching him do it two more times in the sequels. Great Scott! For the record, I’d be wasting my breath trying to deny the absolutely appalling quality of some of the film sequels out there. So I’m not going to. But as an example, did you know there was a Titanic 2? Well there is. I kid you not. I watched it a few weeks back while procrastinating. Yes they made another ship, yes it sunk and yes it was the worst film I have ever seen. And it’s not the so bad it’s funny kind of bad either. It’s the “getting down on Friday” kind of bad. But then again, people tend to love bad films. Not everybody digs the tragically artistic, subtitled wonders (except you hipsters out there with your rolled up skinny jeans and shoes with no socks). Most people watch films to be entertained, not to find a sentimental screen portrayal to relate their oh so unique emotions to. If a film has ripped actors, actresses with ripped clothing, a ripped off story line and ripping CGI, it will succeed. Nobody cares much for originality these days; we just want to be entertained. I admit sequels are not always the best idea. In fact sometimes they are the very worst ideas. But rather than take it out on the sequels, how about direct your anger to the shit films that started the ball rolling. Don’t hate on Fast and Furious 5; hate on the original for bringing the franchise into existence in the first place. Or better yet, just hate on Vin Diesel for being the ultimate tool. All of the worst sequels around are just spawn of their horrendous predecessors so don’t get mad at the sequels when the originals were just as bad. In saying that however, some brilliant films have sequels that should never have been made. Donnie Darko, The Lion King and Jaws to name a couple. But in my eyes, these don’t count as legitimate sequels as they rarely have anything in common with the original except the film title and the general plot idea. The actors, screenwriters, directors, production team, EVERYTHING is different. I suppose you can compare it to a really bad cover band that takes a classic song and rebrands it with their own, awful sound, changing all of the lyrics and singing it off key. In my opinion, films of this description should be regarded as loosely based remakes rather than sequels. Sequels have the magical ability to expose several generations to the same cinematic brilliance. Look at Toy Story as an example. The original came out in 1995 and it was one of the defining films of our generation. Last year, Toy Story 3 was released to a new generation of kids, many for whom it would have been their first experience with Buzz and Woody. But for people our age, it took on a very different meaning with its themes of mortality and closure. The ending had just about everyone I talked to in tears, including myself for a wee while. To watch such an outstanding sequel to a childhood favourite is quite a special experience an original film couldn’t manage. You can’t build a film franchise on one film alone. Make one brilliant film and you have a cult classic; Rocky Horror Picture Show, Fight Club, Pulp Fiction. Make one brilliant film with a couple of good sequels and you have yourself a film franchise; Star Wars, Alien, Terminator, Indiana Jones. You can’t fight the franchise! Without sequels, the world of cinema would be such a different place. We would never have heard Darth Vader tell Luke he was the fruit of his loins or seen Sylvester Stallone star in five more Rocky films. It would just be plain weird to sit through a film and not eagerly anticipate a sequel! And finally, the cherry on top; some sequels are just plain and simple better than the originals. Some stories are just meant to continue. What if The Beatles stopped after Please Please Me? It’s the same with films! How pissed would you be if Christopher Nolan quit after Batman Begins? Sam Raimi after Evil Dead? Francis Ford Coppola after The Godfather? Sequels are around to stay and with good reason. Sure they are responsible for some of the worst movies ever made, but some film ideas just get better as they go along.

13.

by Ashleigh Muir

he Labour Party have been spiralling out of control in the last few weeks as issue after issue and comment after comment leaves leader Phil Goff floundering for public approval. With his MPs insulting one another as a “gaggle of gays” and resigning while the legal system runs its course, Phil Goff’s lack of media suave is letting him and the Labour Party down. Less than eight months out from the 2011 election, the Labour Party should be presenting a strong, united front to take on the ever increasing public support for the National Party. Despite the gap between now and November 26 slowly decreasing, the popularity gap between National and Labour is quickly increasing. A Reid Research poll conducted showed that National is favoured by 57.5 per cent of those surveyed, while Labour has the support of a mere 27.1 per cent. 3 News political editor Duncan Garner commented on the results stating National’s absolute highest popularity in a 3 News poll was 60 per cent, a mere 2.5 per cent higher than they currently sit. If numbers continue as they are, National will be able to run the 50th New Zealand parliament without a coalition government, a first since the MMP system was brought into place in the mid-1990s. Over the past few weeks, on numerous occasions the media have questioned the state of the Labour Party and called into question the leadership of Phil Goff. This was partly sparked by the Darren Hughes affair but the New Zealand Herald quoted a source as saying there was also “a ‘bubbling’ undercurrent for change,” in a March 28 article. On March 26, The Dominion Post published a quote from an anonymous Labour MP saying “it depends if people like Charles Chauvel, Shane Jones, David Parker and Trevor Mallard have the balls to say something,” in regard to Goff’s handling of the Darren Hughes affair. Despite Goff’s continuous insistence of his party’s stability, this constant and consistent criticism of his leadership, from not only the media but his own party, surely cements the idea that Phil Goff is unlikely to win the election later this year. Even Goff’s ex-staff are critical of his behaviour. Goff’s former senior advisor John Pagani told the New Zealand Herald that Goff was isolating himself from his voters by attacking John Key and the popular National-led government. “Every time Labour attacks policies and a government that voters generally approve of, they alienate themselves further from potential supporters who are swinging between Labour and National,” Pagani said.

14.

We often see Goff in the media criticising the actions of the National government, to the point of suggesting finance minister Bill English should resign over the South Canterbury finance debacle. Yet Labour seems to have forgotten how far into the red they left the country when they left power in 2008. National were handed over a country further in debt than anyone expected. The contrast between National and Labour’s media coverage is huge. John Key appears comfortable in front of the lens; he answers questions calmly and to the point. Phil Goff on the other hand looks like a young groom, talking to his shot-gun-wielding father-in-law. Phil Goff stumbles his way through interviews, fumbling his words and stuttering over basic aspects of the English language. He begins answering every question slowly as he builds up his response before spilling it out in quick succession. In contrast, Prime Minister John Key comes straight out with his opinion on major national issues and strongly backs them up with facts. He calmly answers questions asked of him, with consistent tempo and a passion for his reforms and legislation. He is always present at some charitable event, function or major New Zealand crisis. Despite Phil Goff’s failings as an opposition leader and contender for the next prime minister, his position is relatively stable due to the lack of anyone else willing to take the position. Deputy Labour leader Annette King is never heard of; while Goff is terrible with the media, he is at least seen. List MP David Parker is involved with a married woman and David Cunliffe is disliked by his party because he is “too ambitious, too clever and too confident,” something his party is in dire need of. The election ‘race’ will be amusing to watch. Goff, if he can hold his party together, will probably continue with his current strategy of slamming everything National suggests but offering no reasonable alternative. Dirty politics will spill out of the Labour camp while National ignores the immature stabs and suggests that given another term, they can improve our financial situation further. The Greens will continue to gain the votes of those who live in England or further afield and New Zealand First, well, who are they again? All in all, the 2011 election is likely to be quite boring compared to what it could be. National is proving they can run a more than adequate government. No one will oppose the electorates Epsom or Te Tai Tokerau. There is no next contender, as yet.

issue 08 2011

New Zealand is projected to the world as a kind of Utopia. It’s the garden of Eden, the land of the long white cloud. We’re peaceful, we stay out of wars, we protect the environment and we protest against nuclear power. But nothing in this world is perfect and this rings true for our country. We have a secret. We’re not as gentle as we seem. While we put so much energy into protecting our environment and our way of life, we’re failing to protect something far more important. Our children. As a country, we have one of the highest rates of rates of child abuse in the whole world. Considering we think of ourselves as a non-violent, propeace nation, this fact is staggering. When we crucify those who endanger our indigenous animals, we sign petitions to help protect whales in Japan and we sponsor orphans in Africa, why are we not putting as much effort into protecting the most vulnerable members of our own society? Every year our children are suffering or dying at the hands of New Zealanders. In almost all cases, the perpetrators are family members – mothers, fathers, step-parents and extended family who lash out or simply don’t know better, because they were abused too. It’s not a new problem. Child abuse is often the product of a cyclic pattern of abuse and neglect that runs through our society. Those who are abused, often go on to become abusers. Child abuse has been a part of our society for a long time, but only in the past decade has it really been brought to our attention. The most prominent reported case is probably that of toddler Nia Glassie in 2007 who, after a brutal death at the hands of extended-family members, became the poster child for child abuse in New Zealand. Nia’s story made headlines around the world because of the horrific brand of violence inflicted upon her. She was reportedly hung from a clothesline and spun in a clothes dryer. She died in hospital after being taken off life support and it’s believed she was subjected to months of torturous abuse. She was three years old. These ‘months’ of abuse would therefore have made up a significant portion of her short life. While there are many stories of similar abuse occurring in developing nations, where often corruption is rife and value for human life is low, it was shocking to see such brutality in New Zealand – a developed nation. After Nia Glassie’s death, the government stated that “child abuse is inexcusable”. Almost four years later, nothing has changed. The news over the past few years has been peppered with stories of brutality aimed at children, toddlers and babies. Sixteen children were killed by family members in 2009 alone, a staggering amount when you consider the size of our population. And that isn’t even taking into account the number of reported cases of battery and assault – or the unreported cases. Just last Wednesday, the national headlines included a story titled ‘Three infants in hospital with non-accidental injuries’. The story reported on www.ausm.org.nz

two unrelated cases of alleged infant battery. Three babies, between the ages of six and 15 months, were admitted to hospital within a timeframe of 20 hours. This needs to be the wakeup call our country needs. We’ve been sweeping the problem under the carpet for too long, watering it down and making up excuses. Many people use the excuse that New Zealand is actually not really worse than other countries when it comes to child abuse, and that the Child, Youth and Family (CYF) system is so alert to reports and good at detecting cases that a lot more cases get recorded here than elsewhere. This may be true, and maybe we should pride ourselves on knowing that we are working hard to detect cases, but it doesn’t make the huge number of children affected any smaller. The problem still exists; our seedy underbelly of society is just slightly more exposed than others. So we’re good at detecting it - that’s a start. But now we need to be thinking about what we can do to prevent it. Politicians have begun to take note of the fact that this is a serious problem. The anti-smacking bill came into effect in 2007 and generally aims to prevent child abuse by making it easier to prosecute abusers. The bill was hugely controversial, with over 80 per cent of New Zealanders against it. While it’s understandable that parents didn’t want to risk being labelled criminals for disciplining their children with a firm hand (within reason), this attitude is one of the reasons the issue of child abuse hasn’t been taken so seriously in our country by the general population. People would rather have the freedom to discipline their children with smacking than help make our country a safer place. The bill hasn’t proved to be very effective though. There has been no change to our rate of child abuse. When will people wake up and realise this problem is not going to go away? Abuse often occurs in houses with financial difficulties or drug dependencies. We need to get into these households and fix problems at their root. We need to stop pointing fingers at certain groups of people. We need to educate people and provide them with better ways to deal with anger. We need to honour the memories of the infants and children who have so far died or suffered at the hands of our own. We need to act.

15.

by Danielle Whitburn

Take a quick scan of your friends. How many still live under the comfort of mum’s meals and SpongeBob duvet covers? How many are proud of it? More to the point, are you still your parent’s pantry pirate, stumbling in at all hours of the morning with a phone call or two beforehand; your reward an onslaught of the Nag-O-Saurus rapping on your childhood door? I believe, because face-reddening research has told me so, that many of you still are homehobbits, whether you want to admit to it or not. We all love the perks: the home-made cuisine, the freshly-ironed laundry, the thoughtful taping-of-shows, and the Oprah-endorsed talks of “how was your day, honey?” (although perhaps not the cutesy names that follow after them). After all, as known by those who have left home and made the cowardly crawl back, who would prefer two minute noodles and toilet-scrubbing duties to Hotel Home? Yet, the shame lingers. Excuses are made by all of us. “Well, I was flatting/on O.E/am now too poor to afford to live elsewhere.” “My partner dumped me/my parents live in a nicer suburb/I can’t stand my smelly flatmates” are also some less plausible choices. But we must own up to it, my fellow slothful scavengers. We stay at home because we are just too damn lazy to do anything about it. We know, in our deepest, most embarrassed hearts, that the other generations loathe our idyllic idleness. Sometimes we loathe our freedom too, but in a glorious, KFC munching, emo Jeremy Kyle-exaggerated fantasy world of knowing we have the world at our feet. Let them be jealous: why wouldn’t they be? We’re going to be richer, more tech-savvy, less frownlined versions of them. It’s easy to hate your parents, especially when they’re better looking. They might try it on with the cougar-pants, lie about their age, get hideous Joan Rivers facelifts just to deny their ageing abyss of envy, but they

16.

know, too. We’re just that little bit cooler and, as they hate to hear being told, more “chilled out”. In fact, the main explanation for our lovable birthplace lounging is the fact that we are Generation Y, or the ‘Millennials’. What makes us so cool? In a bit of Millennial Wikiesque research, I am told it is because we are discerning consumers with high disposable incomes, think of ourselves as unique, more confident and neo-liberal. Damn. It’s no wonder many of us spend a bit too much time in front of the mirror with the GHD (hopefully minus the often-accompanied tragic mirror self-portrait posted on Facebook). But really. Do you want to know the real reason why we’re still molly-coddled by mothers minions? It’s actually because of our parents. This really should come as no surprise: we have had enough psychologically demanding TV shows, celebrity figures and colloquial advice to want to get into those Barney onesies. Who makes you who you are, according to our neoliberal philosophy? Half nature, half nurture. Who nurtures you? Your mother. The facts stand: you might want to take a deep breath and put your big-kid panties on. Millennials are confident because they are very much wanted by their parents. Millennials are confident because they are sheltered and protected. Millennials are confident because (can you take any more?) they have ‘helicopter’ (hovering) parents who organise and help them in anything. Remember those seemingly silly games where you didn’t have to win, you just had to participate? This PC filth has made us believe we are invincible. A confident and actually quite conventional generation, we are so because mum and dad (or one of the two and a big, annoying step-parent) held out the lollies while we performed the way they wanted us to. Ah, just when we thought we were the ones who had it going on.

Despite the apparent theft of a superb identity, you might be thinking: “I actually really love mum and dad.” You know, you’re really not alone. One of the things that make our generation Millennials is that we are the first generation to truly like our parents. In a recent university-conducted survey, students who were asked who they most admired in the world were the first to answer “mum or dad”. Aw. Dr Phil’s advice, blankly stared at on your sick days off, has finally been put to some use. For all that we love them and admire their good works, our parents really are very good at getting blamed. We’re, as Jerry Springer and Co proclaim, screwed up because mum didn’t give us enough attention, Dad cheated on mum, we missed that special karate class or didn’t get an egg that Easter. Turns out, though, we’re really the eggs. Either values have changed dramatically over the past 20 years or we’re avoiding becoming adults. We, as a Brigham Young University study found, are more likely to define ourselves as adults based on our personal abilities and characteristics rather than things we have actually been through. But weren’t we taught that experience equals knowledge? Is saying we are ‘mature’ and able to work a part-time job enough to say that we live at home, but are not still children? My home-hobbiter friends, it is time to say who we are. We rely on our parents. We cannot blame them for our luxurious lazing, but they do support it. Money’s not really the issue: otherwise where would all the iPods and laptops come from? We can’t seem to leave home because they are part of so much of where our confidence and happiness comes from: the haven called home. As one classmate puts it, “there’s just less responsibility”. Shove that in your SpongeBob and cuddle it.

issue 08 2011

by Brendan Kelly

“Music is the shorthand of emotion.” Leo Tolstoy on music and emotion “Ah, music,” he said, wiping his eyes. “A magic far beyond all we do here!” Albus Dumbledore on music and magic “Blah, blah, Umaga, car car, isobar, googaga roooomance.” Lady Gaga on magic and emotions

Greetings traveler. I haven’t had much time to contribute this year, however the mid-semester break has made me re-experience a sensation I thought was long dead to me – boredom. And so here I am, bringing you another misguided attempt to convince you that my opinions are gospel and yours are about as trustworthy as that little goblin dude from the Labyrinth. I see a lot of people writing articles about the death of pop music, but no one is nearly scathing enough. No one even attempts to put modern pop music on the stand, let alone find it guilty of being fucking awful and sentence it to death by disembowelment with a spork. The unfortunate truth of today is that Gaga, Kanye, Florence and Justin the hairless wonder are worse for the world than Saddam, Hitler and other bad people ever were. But the level of ineptitude in today’s pop scene is not solely down to the performers. There is something far more sinister afoot. There is a common misconception (read: everyone is ignorant) that pop music is short for popular music. It isn’t. Although the term does come from the word popular, pop music is a genre in its own right. The conventions of the genre are simple; the songs are short, they deal with themes that are tried and true, and they make the most of the latest technological innovations. At one point in time this might have meant being able to record the song at all; later, it would have taken the form of an orchestra plugging in the first wave of electric guitars in the ‘30s; later still, The Monkees would invest in the latest Moog synthesiser. But the latest modern innovations are not creating a unique, varied sound. The new technologies do not provide a revolutionary outlet for a multi talented performer. I speak of course of the auto-tuner, the cancer that is killing pop music. The modern pop icon is a messenger of www.ausm.org.nz

mediocrity, an advocate of averageness and a champion of the commonplace (fuck, did you see all that alliteration just now? That was fucking cool, people should send me money). Everything is auto-tuned, rapped, grunted or ‘avant-garde’ (a-vant-garde. -noun. definition: 1. shit but it’s allowed to be ‘cos we’re risque as. 2. La la, matildaaa, incarcerooomance). The time when you worked your way from the ground up is over; pop stars like Hannah fucking Montana and Bieber are churned out every second day, made famous through a combination of money, marketing and the safety in knowing that one day naked pictures of them will be leaked on to the internet. Talent falls behind all of these factors. Auto-tune is the worst fucking invention ever. In 1997 the evil masterminds at Antares Audio Technologies released the processor, and since then ‘musicians’ everywhere have leapt on the chance to make everything sound EXACTLY THE SAME. An advocate for auto-tune might say that it is used to correct slightly imperfect notes for singers who are otherwise flawless. Someone with a brain would argue that T-Pain and Britney Spears are using their auto-tuners for a little more than slight corrections. It allows for a ‘perfect’ performance, 100 per cent of the time, something which used to be achieved through raw talent, hours of practise and a cocktail of crack cocaine and heroin. Or rather, it wasn’t achieved at all – the individuality of a performer was their draw card, that which made them unique. Today an idiosyncrasy is the worst thing a musician can have. Artists like Gaga, Spears and Katy Perry are heralded as bringing about the ‘rebirth’ of pop music. In reality this claim makes one fatal error: crediting the performances to the musicians instead of the software which allows them to be successful. The point of any artform is that not everybody can do it. If we

could all do it, it wouldn’t be a rarity and we wouldn’t give a shit. You don’t buy tickets to watch someone buying a loaf of bread (unless you’re into that). Just as I wouldn’t consider the homeless guy on Queen Street who has somehow found a clarinet in a bin a virtuoso genius, nor would I consider some random scantily-clad slapper with an auto-tuner to be a musical prodigy. The road to fame was once paved with hard work and lousy money, littered with used syringes and shattered guitars; a road which served a dual purpose, sorting good performers from bad, while at the same time giving musicians things to write songs about. I hate to pick on Justin Bieber, but he’s too flimsy to fight back so it’s hard not to. The kid’s life experience is best seen through the lyric, “When I was 13, I had my first love/There was nobody that compared to my baby.” Same bro. Her name was Pokemon. Even in pop music, lyrics used to mean something. Now it seems they are merely a tool to spout utter drivel. The unfortunate truth is, auto-tuned music is everywhere. Producers are surprised when a musician requests to not use it. And although not everyone comes out sounding like the robot from Lost in Space, T-Pain is just the tip of the iceberg. And I will admit even I am forced to concede that at times, auto-tuned songs are not entirely terrible. But a song is always less impressive when you realise that the ‘talent’ is emitted from a pitch corrector. Auto-tuner may be a passing craze – at least, I would like to hope so. Sadly history would suggest that, like the electric guitar and the synthesiser before it, such an invention will be popular for a long time to come. And so I issue a warning to you, the people of Townsville. You are the catalyst for change. If you stop buying the shit, they’ll stop making it. So tell the auto-tuner to fuck off, and maybe we’ll get some real music again.

17.

THE LAW

won't be deterred by fine will be deterred by fine Already download legally

reactions to the new Copyright Amendment Bill tvnz.co.nz online poll

The Copyright (Infringing File Sharing) Amendment Bill was passed by parliament on April 14 by an overwhelming 111-11 majority. Come September 1, the government will be able to monitor the file sharing activities of more than three million internet users. It is an ‘amendment’ because it repeals a current clause in the Copyright Act – section 92A, which will be replaced by a new threenotice system for copyright infractions. This new system means that internet users found downloading movies and music without permission from the copyright owner – or without legally purchasing them – will receive warnings the first two times they are caught. If a person ignores these warnings, continues to download, and is caught a third time, they will be penalised. The ultimate aim of the law is to eradicate illegal downloading in the name of artists and in the hopes of protecting creativity. According to the New Zealand Herald, Commerce Minister Simon Power – who introduced the bill to parliament early last year – hopes the legislation will “discourage illegal file sharing and provide more effective measures to help our creative industries enforce their copyright”.

Paid to download a music album Paid to download a music track Streamed music on computer downloaded a song without paying for it watched music videos on computer

Which of the following have you done in the past three months? Nielson poll of more than 25,000 U.S users, conducted late 2010

WHAT THIS MEANS FOR DOWNLOADERS

Watch out kids, because the new law is bringing harsh penalties. From September 1, as per the three-notice system, illegally downloading copyright-protected material will be punishable by fines of up to $15,000. Copyright holders will also be allowed to contact Internet Service Providers (ISPs) if they believe a client of the ISP has been illegally downloading or sharing their material. A lot of people will be thinking, “so what? How will they catch me?”. The answer to that is: pretty easily, actually. Essentially, if you continue to use peer-topeer (P2P) file-sharing services, such as Bittorrent, copyright holders can find you and identify you using the digital download trail you leave on the internet. The copyright holder can then send you warnings via your ISP, although they will have to pay the ISP each time they want to do so.

18.

If two warnings are ignored, the copyright holder can take the downloader (or freeloader) to a tribunal targeted to deal with such issues. If the downloader is found to have behaved illegally, they will be fined and suspended from the internet. Internet suspension may be up to six months, as per the request of the copyright holders involved or if a person is a repeat offender. It all sounds a bit like being sent to the dean for misbehaving in high school. But at the end of the day, the penalties do seem severe enough to make people think twice before pressing the download button for that episode of Grey’s Anatomy. Imagine trying to get your assignments done with the internet cut off, or even worse – having to face your flatmates when they find out they can’t access Facebook because you’re a kleptomaniac downloader. An upside of the system however, is that you will be able to plead your case at the tribunal – maybe the neighbours tapped into your wifi, maybe you forgot to put a password on your network, maybe you were hacked by that little old lady down the road who you just know has a penchant for The Daily Show? It’s unlikely that the tribunal will accept your excuse though, unless you have proof. If you can provide evidence that Martians really did land in your backyard and furiously downloaded season one of The Office, then great, you may be off the hook. Otherwise, the new law generally means you are considered guilty until proven innocent. This ‘guilt upon accusation’ factor is just one of the reasons the new law has garnered a large amount of public backlash.

issue 08 2011

BACKLASH

One of the main groups to target the bill has been the Creative Freedom Foundation. While the foundation agrees that copyright infringement is wrong, they state that the “replacement to Section 92A is an Internet Termination Law that harms many people for the actions of one.” “We don’t cut off a family’s postal service if one person uses it to break the law. We don’t cut off electricity because someone plays music too loud. How can it be okay to cut off the internet?” The foundation further claims that illegal downloading can happen by mistake. “Twenty-five per cent of computers are infected with viruses that download and distribute material without the owner’s knowledge. What if that owner is a school or a hospital?” Another party that has vocally expressed their disdain of the new bill is ‘Anonymous’ – an international online collective which caters to ‘the art of being indignant’. Anonymous posted a voice-over video message to the New Zealand government on YouTube saying, “the passing of the Infringing File Sharing Bill is both a form of censorship and an invasion of privacy. Anonymous will not let this go unnoticed. Your belief that one is guilty until proven innocent is an unlawful and unjust policy”. Regular Kiwis are also finding the new law censoring and unrealistic. Student Ella Mikic-Trbojevic says the bill is “over-the top, infringing on rights and ultimately won’t work”. Even Kiwi ex-pats, like recent graduate Natasha Lewis who is currently working for the United Nations in New York, think the bill is a mistake. “It creates privileged communities who have access to information based on an outdated notion of ownership (via copyright) which can’t be properly applied to the emerging technology, like the internet, that now dominates information sharing”, Lewis says. A Facebook page, ‘Opposing the Copyright (Infringing File Sharing) Amendment Bill’, has even been established and has gained over 11,000 ‘likes’. It’s no secret that students are big time filesharers, so it’s also no secret that most students are opposed to the bill. However, there are some who are affirming the government’s decision. “It’s good of the government to stand up for IP rights”, says student Mary Dolan. “Stealing is wrong, and breaking the law deserves punishment.”

www.ausm.org.nz

WHAT NOW?

It will be interesting to see how effective this new law will be. Will it stamp out illegal downloading for good, will it have no major effect, or will the success be short lived? It’s possible that people may hold off on downloading for a while to see whether others are getting caught, or maybe just until they work out ways to get around the law. It’s only a matter of time before alternatives start popping up. We’ve faced similar, albeit much smaller, hurdles before. When the popular P2P software Limewire was shut down due to a court injunction, many people were left wondering what to do and where to go for their downloading. They didn’t have to wonder for long though because overnight, alternatives to Limewire cropped up. Local Internet Service Provider EOL has recently voiced this fact, saying people will start using encryption and IP tunnelling software to mask their activities on peer to peer networks. “They’re not going to be able to be seen and no one will be able to see what they’re downloading...the people on the internet who drive this sort of thing are a lot smarter than the people who make the rules, I think, or they’re certainly a lot more IT savvy, anyway”, says managing director of EOL, Terry Coles. Those who aren’t so brave have the option of streaming – which is still allowed under the new law. Streaming movies and music is alright, as long as you do not personally store anything to keep as your own. It’s not as good as downloading, but for those who aren’t overly tech savvy this might be the best option once the law comes into effect. It’s also possible a black market of previously downloaded media will spring up – particularly among students. One terabyte hard drives are so easy to come by now and will make storing and swapping movies or songs between friends very simple.

THE VERDICT

This may not be a popular law but the main point is – it is the law. The bill’s been passed, it’s a done deal. So the only thing we can really do about it now is suck it up and live with it. Look for alternative options if you have the IT smarts to, if not, maybe it’s time to start buying music and movies legally. Granted, iTunes may be expensive but it’s still cheaper than buying CDs. And back before MP3s were around, during the era of the discman, we wouldn’t have gone around stealing CDs from music stores because we didn’t want to fork out the $30. I can see both sides of the story here though. Music and film are forms of art – they are an integral part of global culture. Shouldn’t they then be readily available to everyone, and not just those who can afford it? Isn’t this what artist should be aiming for instead? It’s this very message that pop star Jessie J sings in her recent hit Price Tag. “It’s not about the money, money, money We don’t need your money, money, money We just wanna make the world dance, Forget about the price tag.”

19.

by Jarred Williamson

Over the past month or so we’ve heard about the increasing use of public transport in Auckland. But with this increase in numbers comes the realisation that the infrastructure cannot cope or work properly. For many of us living further outside the inner part of Auckland city we face this every day when commuting to and from university. On a slightly cheerier note, early April saw the HOP Card finally announced – a first step to true integrated transport. But I do have a few points on that. I live in the area of Botany, which has seen one of the largest population booms in Auckland in recent years, with areas like Mission Heights and Dannemora growing out of the fields. Despite this huge growth, the area has probably seen the least amount of infrastructure improvement – with the narrow and congested Ti Rakau Drive being one of the main routes out of the area, each year it seems the travel time increases. The former Manukau City Council, the ‘future planners’ they were, neglected the area and did nothing about transport or roading infrastructure. As with most things Auckland, it’s either been put off or not thought through entirely. Leaving town at 5.30pm will still take about an hour and a half to get home – the main issues are Newmarket and Ti Rakau drive. The other night (after my diary entry below) it took 25-30 minutes to get from Britomart to Westfield Newmarket. Botany is not blessed to have rail or a ferry service (although in a further neighbouring area there is Half Moon Bay). This means we rely on buses operated by Howick and Eastern to take us places. In the first seven weeks of university I’ve got a little ticked off about how inconvenient the buses are. At times it’s just as easy to drive your car. No bus lanes equals buses sitting in traffic jams. What’s worse is that putting in bus lanes isn’t that difficult in many areas – it just needs to be done. I promise I will stop complaining shortly, it’s just in the many hours of lost productivity I have had time to think. Why doesn’t Botany have an express route? This will be a good question to put to Howick and Eastern and Auckland Transport. The Pakuranga area has an express route, why not us? There are plenty of students who do sit all the way through to Botany; I’m sure they’d appreciate a faster ride home. As I mentioned before, in April the HOP Card was finally announced. At long last too, this will see Auckland move out of the stone age of slow bus boarding and ticket conductors into a more convenient system of tagging on and off buses. By doing this it will charge you the appropriate fare. This is all very painless and straightforward. What’s even better when you use this kind of system overseas is that you can use it across multiple modes

20.

of transport and in Auckland’s case, more than one bus provider. Oh, but wait. There is just a slight issue, private bus providers like Howick and Eastern, Ritchies, Birkenhead Transport and Fullers won’t be launching the HOP card and as far as I’m aware, the Northern Express buses won’t either. See? It just doesn’t go far enough. The local newspaper out here caught onto this issue and stated in an article that Howick and Eastern are still “researching ticketing systems” and to possibly expect the arrival of HOP by the end of 2012. I cannot comprehend why we cannot learn from international cities and their similar experiences and we must do things differently, to which they ultimately fail. From experience overseas, these systems work. They are attractive for convenience of using transport (we still need to work on frequency and routes) and they’re not rocket science to understand. I guess the best thing to do is watch the paint dry on this, though I won’t be letting go of the issue. I’m certainly going to be talking with the appropriate bodies involved with transport – so should you, it’s been long enough. To illustrate our frustrations I’ve enlisted some help from one of my fellow Communication Studies buddies, Stephanie ArthurWorsop from Papakura. We both live well over 30 minutes out of Auckland Central. We have written a diary of a typical day or week getting to or from university.

issue 08 2011

4.09pm: Boarded the bus, for once it’s arrived at Britomart on time. The bus driver’s name is Troy, he’s a young guy and pretty cheery. 4.15pm: Bus has left Britomart; we’re on time leaving! Reasonable boarding time, although the people with the $10 notes take a bit of time. 4.21pm: Arrived at the Symonds Street stop opposite AUT; thank goodness for this bus lane. Although the amount of students walking around is down (Auckland Uni is on break), seats are, however, filling up. 4.29pm: We’ve just stopped outside Auckland Hospital; the only hold up was the pedestrian crossing. It’s pretty clear boarding with a card is faster than coinage. 4.36pm: Just about to turn onto Broadway, Newmarket. Traffic lights are tedious between Auckland Hospital and Newmarket; if you get one red light, you get them all. Two students have just got on the bus and can’t decide on which seats to take. Rebecca Black springs to mind. 4.38pm: Just outside Westfield Newmarket. A handful

of people just got on. Oh, and another red light. This is quite reasonable thus far.

4.46pm: We’re on Great South Road; I can see Maccas in the distance. Just hit a long traffic queue, slowly moving now. 4.54pm: Reached Ellerslie! Long line of cars, someone is crossing the road. Wow, high school kids are still in their uniform? Dedicated.

Monday 7.30am: Train is late. Not only did I speed from my house to get to the train station in time, but upon arriving I hear a voice come over the intercom saying “Due to signal failures on southern lines at Pukekohe, Papakura and Otahuhu, the 7.30 service will be delayed by approximately 10 minutes, Thank you for your patience”. Eventually the train does arrive but it is already jam packed with passengers who got on at Pukekohe so half the people at my stop have to stand the entire way to Britomart... my stop is the SECOND out of seventeen. I’m sure it’s not too hard to be efficient and add extra carriages at peak hours?

Tuesday 6.10am: Train is cancelled. As if getting to university by 8am from Papakura wasn’t inconvenient enough, the intercom voice decides to tell me that I could have slept in for another half an hour because the train has been CANCELLED. For no apparent reason. Just because. Let’s not even get into the fact that I was then squashed into a TINY train when one did arrive. Thankfully though, I wasn’t late to my tutorial… I had to run up Queen St.

5.03pm: Just passed the intersection of Lunn Ave and the Ellerslie-Panmure Highway. This part of the trip is usually smooth. Spoke too soon! Another huge queue of traffic. 5.06pm: Still moving slowly toward the roundabout. This guy has pulled up next to the bus drinking a Heineken, long day huh? 5.08pm: Through the roundabout! A bus lane would be, well,

pretty helpful right about now. More traffic lights. *sigh*

5.12pm: We’ve left Panmure now and heading toward the Pakuranga plaza. 5.16pm: At the intersection of Ti Rakau Drive and the Pakuranga Highway. I wouldn’t like to be going up the highway; a traffic jam is an understatement. Oh, and of course, NO BUS LANES to be seen. Looks like fun for those on the 50, 51 and 52 services going that way. 5.19pm: Ti Rakau Drive is a mess. A lot of cars going in both directions. There’s no bus lane, so the bus basically just sits next to all the cars. 5.23pm: We haven’t got that far down the road, but

interestingly, we just passed the 681 service that left 10-15 minutes before us from Britomart.

5.30 pm: Energetic Troy has lost his smile. This is crazy, we still haven’t gone through this intersection! 5.38 pm: Just left the bus stop at Botany Town Centre, about three quarters of the bus got off at Botany. There are a reasonable handful of us left. Thank goodness for iPods and MP3 players; they make this long journey a little more bearable. 5.43 pm: Botany Road now. It’s a bit of a car park out there, slow progress. Bets in if I make the 6pm news or not. 5.52 pm: At long last I’ve reached my bus stop. Troy gives me a wave as I get off. A quick five minute walk up the road and I’m home. I did make the news.

Wednesday 7.30am: Oh what a surprise! Train is delayed. “Due to signal failures...your train will be delayed approximately 10-15 minutes. Thank you for your patience.” Well, actually, I’m not being too patient, and I am about ready to blow my top off at the people behind this. It’s easy enough for them to sit in their office and think ‘oh dear, another signal failure. What a shame’, all the while the rest of us are standing outside in the morning cold having to be ‘patient’. Auckland public transport? There’s not much transporting going on in my opinion.

Thursday 6.30am: FINALLY! A train that is scheduled and running ON TIME! Oh but wait, about 20 minutes into the ‘pleasant’ (overcrowded, uncomfortable, third worldequivalent) journey, the train stops suddenly in the middle of Westfield and that dreaded voice pipes up on the intercom: “There has been a signal failure...” I had to be careful not to look at anyone in particular because the look on my face was enough to scare even the biggest, badass train conductors. To make matters worse, when the train started moving again, at the next stop, the train conductors told the people waiting to just “pack in there”. And I am paying for this service why? I am being charged ridiculous prices so that I can be treated like cattle in a third world country? GOOD ONE.

* Please note this bus diary was written when Auckland University was on break – there weren’t as many students on the bus. www.ausm.org.nz

21.

by Samantha McQueen/Q&A supplied

It’s hard to believe that just over a decade ago James Franco was an unknown actor who had just landed a starring role in the cult classic TV show, Freak and Geeks, which also launched the careers of Seth Rogan, Jason Segal and Judd Apatow. Nowadays he is Hollywood’s answer to a jack-of-all-trades. He’s one of Hollywood’s rare chameleons; he garnered a Golden Globe nomination for his role as a long-haired stoner in Pineapple Express the same year he won the Independent Spirit Award for his supporting role in Milk, a political drama with Sean Penn. He’s played a best friend/villain in the Spider-man trilogy, a tattooed criminal in Date Night, a performing artist called Franco on the soap General Hospital and most recently, Aron Ralston, an adrenaline junkie who has to amputate his arm after being trapped by a boulder in a Utah canyon in 24. The latter role earned him his first Oscar nomination at the 83rd Academy Awards – an event he also co-hosted with Anne Hathaway. It seems Franco doesn’t have an “off” switch. When he’s not juggling his extremely hectic workload, he’s not relaxing like most would. Rather, he throws himself into study and teaching. He’s currently working towards a PhD in English at Yale University and he just got accepted into his second PhD at the University of Houston, which he will begin in September 2012. That’s adding to his previous degrees he gained at UCLA, New York University and Columbia University, as well as a handful of other short courses at various universities. Next up on Franco’s list is Your Highness, which teamed him up with Pineapple Express director David Gordon Green and actor Danny McBride, Zooey Deschanel ((500) Days of Summer) and Natalie Portman (Black Swan). Best described as a movie where “medieval gets filthy”, Franco plays Fabious, the crown prince of the Kingdom of Mourne who embarks on a foul-mouthed comedy adventure with his younger brother Thadeous (McBride) when his fiancée is kidnapped. Read on for an exclusive Q&A with James Franco himself.

22.

Tell us what the medieval comedy Your Highness is about. Your Highness is about two brothers in a fantastical kingdom. I am, strangely enough, the older brother and the next in line for the throne. I play a very brave and honorable knight and Danny (McBride) plays the younger brother who is the opposite. We are forced by circumstances to go on a quest together and there are lots of fantastic creatures and comedy. You are offered a lot of films by top directors. What enticed you to make Your Highness? I had such a great experience on Pineapple Express and working with Danny McBride and David Gordon Green, so I didn’t have to think about it. David called me and said he was going to do Your Highness with Danny and he’d sent me the script. He was interested in the dynamic between the brothers. Did you enjoy the improvisation on the Your Highness set? I did. None of it was a surprise. I’d just made Pineapple Express with them and we improvised on that. The script was good so it wasn’t like it needed us to improvise. However, by improvising not only do you come up with lines not in the script, it adds energy to the performances that frees the actors because you’re not sure what is going to happen. It’s not just about coming up with the best line. It’s about making the behavior feel more authentic. You are known for delving deep into your character and undergoing a lot of preparation. To play James Dean you started smoking and in City by the Sea you lived on the streets. What about this film? Well, those movies are a while ago now. I used to spend eight months preparing for a role. There was a movie I did, Tristan + Isolde, where I did a lot of preparation and they ended up not using any of it. So, fortunately I could use all of the sword fighting and horse riding preparation from Tristan + Isolde for Your Highness [laughs].

It’s hard to define you because you have crossed all genres in film with recent choices dramas like 127 Hours and Milk, action movies like Spider-man, romantic dramas including Eat Pray Love, comedies such as Pineapple Express, the TV soap General Hospital and now the comedy fantasy Your Highness. Has that been a deliberate choice of yours? I’m at a point of my life where I do not like to be told what to do, whether it is explicitly or by expectations. So, certainly if there is something unusual or unexpected I am definitely interested. I really just engage in products that interest me. Public expectations and responses are unpredictable. I can’t depend on that or manipulate it in any way. It’s just about doing what interests me. You have now worked with Danny and David on two films. Can you describe how they work together? They really do feed off each other. If they ever show the outtakes of Your Highness you’ll see the dynamic of David and Danny. David is not a director who just sits by the monitor. He is up with the actors. It often seems like he’s up acting the scenes with us. It’s almost like David and Danny are both performing. It seems like working with people you like is almost as important as the script and other factors. I work with people I like. I get to do projects I like. I can say that for Your Highness and 127 Hours, I had a great time on both of the movies. I want to make good movies, but unless you know you are going to make The Godfather or something, you don’t want to work with people that make you feel bad and you don’t collaborate well with. Because I do have the luxury of working with friends or people I like, as a performer I have everything I can ask for.

issue 08 2011

by Alisha Lewis One of the benefits of being alive is, well, being alive when stuff happens. Events. Moments of significant global importance. It’s fair to say our generation has had our fair share of these. This year alone we’ve seen social revolutions, civil wars, earthquakes and tsunamis. While not all of these have been positive, it’s definitely been a year of witnessing history in the making. For many people though, another event has been added to that list. So sound the trumpet, alert the corgis, because we’ve just witnessed a royal spectacle. On April 29 Prince William and Kate Middleton got married. After a notso-whirlwind romance that spanned more than six years, the couple, both aged 29, finally decided to make it official. And ever since they announced their engagement last November the world has watched and scrutinised, with obsessive fervour, their every move. From details of the bachelorette and stag parties, to who’s designing the wedding dress, to who made the guest list, people hung on to every titbit of information surrounding what was touted as the biggest event of the decade. Though that’s not saying much – we’re only just over a year into the new decade – there’s no denying that this was a big deal. Writing this before the event has taken place is hard, but it was estimated that the ceremony, which took place in Westminster Abbey, would draw around one billion viewers. It was also being called the ‘biggest social media event’ and ‘biggest technological buildout’ ever. Not only is that a mouthful to say but it’s also a hell of a lot to take in. In a world where technology saturates our everyday lives, for a wedding – an age-old rite of passage experienced by most of the world’s population – to escalate to such a massive scale is borderline ludicrous. What’s with this insane level of hysteria surrounding such a trite tradition? Why do we care so much? This question applies particularly well to us here in New Zealand. We all became caught up in the hype and excitement surrounding the happenings of April 29. People planned royal themed parties for the night of the wedding, the Langham hotel had a celebratory ‘Royal Wedding Afternoon Tea’ and some Kiwis actually flew to England to experience it all in person. There was even talk of the wedding being broadcast live in 3D in movie theatres. I don’t know if I’d be willing to shell out the ticket price just for an up-close and personal view of Will’s receding hairline. It all seemed a little odd. Particularly since we’re way over on the other side of the world and haven’t really been connected with the monarchy since the early 1900s. There’s been the odd visit from a member of the royal family every now and then but other than that they don’t have much to do with our lives. In fact, a One News Colmar Brunton poll in 2002 showed that 58 per cent of Kiwis thought the royal family had little to no relevance in our lives. Especially since the idea of a monarchy has become so archaic within our democratic society. Yet despite how much we advocate independence and egalitarianism, we’re hesitant to relinquish our ties to this old family on the other side of the world. Surveys constantly show that the New Zealand public is generally in favour of the retention of the monarchy. Perhaps it’s because we’re a country of loyalists, reluctant to discard our past, or simply because we only have about two and a half minutes of national history and we’re just making the most of it. Whatever the reason, we’re holding onto this aspect of our heritage. We’re embracing it and we’re celebrating. But we’re not the only ones. In America, major television channels such as CNN and E! devoted all-day coverage to the event, along with hundreds

www.ausm.org.nz

of other international television stations. Most of them don’t have old ties to Britain like we do, but there were other reasons people were milking this royal moment. For one thing, William is to be king one day, making this more important than any other wedding. Mainly however, for people who were alive to see Diana become the Princess of Wales in a jaw-dropping gown with an eight metre train, there were huge expectations for Kate Middleton to create a similar awe inspiring moment. For many people, that was the moment when the magical world of princes and princesses in gilded carriages was not confined to the pages of a Hans Christian Anderson storybook. Diana was beloved by not only her country but the whole world. When she died, the world grieved. This wedding, the largest since Charles and Diana’s in 1981, has marked a new beginning. Speaking of magical worlds, another reason this particular couple has stolen people’s hearts is because of what I like to call ‘the fairytale factor’. They tick all the boxes for a classic fairytale couple. They’re both attractive for starters. Kate is undeniably beautiful, with a lovely figure, classy brown locks and perfect bone structure. The prince is also easy on the eyes. Granted, probably should have got a head start on some

hair loss prevention, he still has the looks that crowned him a total heart throb over the past decade. People like to see pretty people. That’s why Cinderella wasn’t plain with buck teeth and her Prince Charming didn’t have a paunch. There’s also a bit of a Cinderella story going on. William’s girl is referred to as a ‘commoner’ within the royal social circle. Despite coming from a millionaire family, Kate was often ridiculed because of the way her parents made their wealth – through an online party products company. She’s the ‘girl next door’ who fell in love with a prince. Aren’t you just waiting for the blockbuster biopic to come out? It may be irrational, it may be over the top, but I can see why people are falling for the fairytale. When there are so many horrifying things happening in the world today – natural disasters, unemployment, civil unrest, the release of Justin Bieber’s new movie – it’s understandable that people want to enjoy a little reprieve from the madness. It’s a celebration of love and a little bit of luxury we could all take part in. So I hope you swiped your mum’s posh china and got in the mood with a cup of Earl Grey. Pinkies out, of course.

23.

by Jason Burnett Like most of Auckland, I braved the traffic and ventured away for the Easter break to spend some time with family. After a few hours though, I was over the bickering and power struggles and decided to wet my whistle at the tavern. It wasn’t busy with a handful of locals sprinkled around the place, everyone appearing to keep to themselves, drinking deep in thought. Finding my place at the bar I sat down to enjoy a Heineken. Not long after, a portly man sat down next to me, his beer belly spilling between some blue jeans and a dirty t-shirt that read “Happy F*cking Easter?”. He was texting someone called Heyzeus asking what he was up to this weekend. “Alright, mate?,” he said to me between heavy sniffles, wiping away what looked like icing sugar from below his nostrils. “Hard night?,” I replied. “Mate, don’t even get me started,” he began. “I work hard all year and I look forward to a bit of time off. Pretty shitty this year though, not only did we miss out on Waitangi Day but Anzac Day falls on Easter Monday! I should probably jump on the bandwagon and move to Aussie with the rest of New Zealand; at least I’d get a couple more long weekends to party away.” Too true, I thought and took a sip of my beer. He was onto his second already and continued: “Mind you, I’ve had enough of airports. I got into a bit of strife recently with those new body scanning machines. I tried to take a few eggs with me for the flight and next thing I know I’m escorted to a private room, stripped and cavity searched! They thought I was trying to smuggle some exotic eggs back into New Zealand! ‘I’m in the free range business,’ I said, and they finally believed me but not after I missed my bloody plane. Pack a wankers! Be right back mate.” He disappeared off to the bathroom again. As quick as he shot off, he was back, sniffing like it was going out of fashion. Poor guy, must’ve had a cold! “Two for me love and another for my friend here,” he burped at the barmaid. Without me even saying thank you he started up again, “You got any kids?,” he slurred. “Not yet,” I replied. “Good on ya, it’s the end of ya life. I’ve got quite the brood and kids these days never stop wanting the latest fangdangled contraptions like a playbox or an xstation or one of those touch phones from the bloody fruit company. I got them some chocolate eggs for Easter and you’d think I’d given them herpes or something! Wait till they find out I’m not taking them to the Easter Show this year! Bloody expensive that too, and it’s just crap. Can’t afford to waste money on crap with this recession and all. Business is hard enough over Easter as it is!” I didn’t know what to say. “Plans for the long weekend, mate?,” he said pulling out his phone to check a text. “Just a quiet one with the family,” I replied taking the last swig of my beer, planning to make a hasty retreat. “Good man,” he chirped, “I gotta shoot – got a meeting with a CFYS case worker apparently its weird to hang out in a school playground handing out chocolate? What’s the world coming to eh? Then I’m gonna go see ma mate, Heyzeus, and carry on partying. He’s getting nailed this weekend with his PICs and probably won’t be up until Monday!” And with that, he hopped off the bar stool, put some rabbit ears on his head stumbled out to his car. Plus one to the holiday road toll right there I thought. Wait, was that a bunny tail he had? Hold on...was that the? No...Really?

by Jess Etheridge I’m feeling just a bit apathetic towards film at the moment. There are too many remakes, bad acting and superheroes for me, personally. Many of you will be like “oh man, superhero movies are the greatest” but I’m being saturated in spandex and capes. Instead, I turn to film’s nemesis* – television. I’ve been watching a lot more television than film (or should I say watching a lot more television series, instead of actually watching a box). This is a bizarre turn of events for myself, as all I’ve ever wanted to do in the past is sit in a nice, air conditioned cinema with a choc top. There is such a plethora of good television shows out at the moment; I can’t even express how overwhelmed and jubilant I am, all at the same time. And because I like to present listicles** and because I think you should listen to my opinion, here are my top four shows of the moment. Pretty Little Liars Ok I have to actually admit I still need to get around to finishing the pilot episode – I got busy, ok? –but so far it is such a guilty pleasure. I’ve never been a Gossip Girl fan, although the majority of my friends are, and I always feel left out when we have a get together and all of a sudden the topic of Blair and Serena’s friendship takes priority. Pretty Little Liars is sort of a Gossip Girl show for those who never jumped on the GG bandwagon, but it’s also a show GG fans everywhere love and will love. The first series sinks its teeth into some ground-breaking story lines too. Intelligent and ballsy guilty pleasure? Yes please! Skins (UK) I am 21-years-old and I still watch Skins (UK). It’s pretty sad, however the latest generation are just as good, if not slightly better than the first generation – don’t kill me! If you were like myself and many around the world, you would’ve been generally disappointed with the second generation of Skins kids but give the show another shot. The third generation offers more than superficial characters and issues, as well as an extremely talented and attractive cast. Survivor: Redemption Island Coming to TV3 this year at some point – as far as I can tell – the first episode is the most shocking, most explosive and most jaw-dropping I have EVER watched. I have never suffered such severe second-hand embarrassment as a result of one Survivor tribal council. A couple of familiar faces return to show the newbies how the game is played but a few loose cannons may prove difficult to control in the game where secrecy and lies are key. Glee Of course, Glee is my favourite show of all time. This second season started off pretty mediocre but after the Super Bowl episode, which screened here a month or so ago, the series has started to get back into a good routine. Glee tackles the serious issues this series, such as sexuality, body image and family, as well as trying to find a way to get to Regionals without being stomped on by Sue Sylvester. I am a self-professed, hard out Gleek and no one can stop me, not even my mother who, sometimes rightly, gets extremely annoyed at me belting out the classic Glee covers. I promise regular film viewing will return in a jiffy but right now, I am having a serious love affair with television. In the meantime, why not let AuSM know what films you’ve seen by popping a comment on their Facebook page? * I am calling it. TV is definitely film’s nemesis. It makes it slightly more exciting in my head than it actually is. ** Listicle is a mash-up of a list and an article. I like lists. I write articles. Perfect match.

24.

issue 08 2011

It’d be a sweet deal. Sure, he wouldn’t be around much because he’d be off shooting first rate movies or having lunch with godfather Steven Spielberg somewhere. But when he’d take time off shooting I think he would be totally fun. Growing up would be totally easy. If you ever got sad or needed cheering up, Tom could provide great entertainment by doing a one man sheriff Woody show or he could get his pal Tim Allen to join him in a Toy Story 4 improv session in your own house. He also remembers what it was like to be a kid, since he once was a 13-year-old trapped in a 30-year-old body after he played that weird fortune teller arcade game. He’d understand that a room should be filled with toys and candy and that playing chopsticks with your feet on a giant piano was a great achievement. As you get older, he’ll be able to teach you invaluable life skills, like how to catch fish with a wooden spear or make a fire without a lighter or a match. He’ll give you tips on how to outsmart the most cunning of bank robbers and he’ll be able to engage in philosophical discussions about religion, justice and the flaws in airport immigration. When you find that special someone, who better than Mr Hanks to teach you about matters of the heart? He can show you how to find love on the internet, and what to say to the girl (or guy) of your digital dreams. This time you’ll have broadband over dial-up, so there would be no issues with slow replies. Big budget films mean big pay checks. You could have free choice to choose the university of your dreams. Harvard? Yale? AUT? Somewhere else? The options are open to you. I doubt you’d get picked on at school if they knew who your dad was. Remember, he’s a ping pong champion, a really fast runner and he’s served in a couple of wars. It’d be an interesting upbringing that’s for sure. Parent teacher conferences may attract unwanted paparazzi and attention from other parents. You’d get invites to all the advance screenings, and Tom’s almost ‘legend’ status among his acting peers would always guarantee you seats within the first five rows at any big awards ceremony. That includes a tuxedo and an instant way to meet some stars. He’d provide good fatherly wisdom gained from his dozens of film roles which are all different in some way. If you’re a girl, that means you probably get to hang with Meg Ryan and Julia Roberts every once in a while which could be fun. Rita Wilson as a mother seems win-win; she doesn’t do many movies but she seems like she’d be a good role model. You never see her name turn up in the gossip magazines for stealing necklaces or violating her probation, which is definitely a good thing. Sorry Lindsay. Getting to go onto the set of the movies would also be a dream come true for any kid. You could say your dad has starred in films that have made billions of dollars, has been stranded on an island and in an airport terminal, played a gangster during the depression, found true love with Meg Ryan – twice – and been one half of the iconic Toy Story duo. That’s quite a resume, one that any kid would be proud of for their dad. I’m also sure that somewhere inside your house a trophy cabinet with the 1993 and 1994 best actor Oscars will be shining proudly. And more important than anything else, instead of auctioning it off, he’d probably have given you Wilson. What more needs to be said?

www.ausm.org.nz

by James Wheeler

25.

This Agony Aunt column is brought to you by the team at Health, Counselling and Wellbeing. If you have a question you would like answered email debate@aut.ac.nz and put Agony Aunt as the subject or drop it in to the Health, Counselling and Wellbeing office.

Dear Agony Aunt

Two months ago I had an abortion. I thought I was dealing with it okay and that I would gradually get better and get over it. I don’t have a boyfriend and I’m ashamed to say I don’t know who the father was. I was drunk and had sex with a boy, a complete stranger. I cannot believe that I did this. I told only my best friend who has been a great strength to me and looked after me after the abortion, but I’m not coping and I am crying most of the day and pretty much every night. I feel so guilty and so stupid to have gotten myself into such an awful situation. I know I need help, I just don’t know where to go. From Sad

Dear Fit

Even if some of us won’t admit it we all make mistakes. Don’t try to cope with this on your own, it’s too big. Come and talk to a counsellor or nurse at Health Counselling and Wellbeing. You need to acknowledge your feelings and work through them in a supportive environment. You will probably never forget what has happened to you but you will learn to come to terms with it so you can carry on and live a happy life.

I didn’t take my contraceptive pills over the holidays because I couldn’t get a doctor’s appointment to get a prescription in time. I have been having sex with my boyfriend and we have been using condoms but not all the time. My period is a week late and I’m starting to panic. Help, what I shall do. My folks would kill me if I was pregnant. From Forgetful

Dear Forgetful

If you have unprotected sex then you run the risk of getting pregnant. You should book an appointment to see a nurse or doctor and have a pregnancy test. There is no point worrying until you know for sure. Missing a period doesn’t always mean you are pregnant; you might get away with it this time. If you do, learn from this, go back on the pill or talk to a nurse about your contraception options. If you are pregnant there are people at university who can help you. Start by booking an appointment to see a nurse at Health Counselling and Wellbeing. Phone (09) 921 9992 for City campus or (09) 921 9998 for North Shore campus. Alternatively you can see a nurse or doctor at your local Family Planning centre.

by Katie Montgomerie

Welcome back to debate after the break! I hope it was a break for some of you; for unfortunate people like me, the two week “holiday” was full of stress, group meetings and 3000 word essays… fun. Now, for this week’s Word(s) of the Week I thought we could focus on all of the little things students do to save themselves money. Do we think of creating budgets and cutting down on costs by not buying lunch at uni? Of course not! For example, how about cutting down on stationary costs by practicing a little…

Cleptopenia

(Klep-toe-pee-nee-a) The act of unconsciously thieving pen’s from unsuspecting victims Example: “I swear, I left my pencil case at the table in the library for like two seconds, and when I came back it was gone!” “Ah, it must have been a poor student with cleptopenia.”

26.

There is another money saving tactic that students most commonly use. However, just like cleptopenia it’s still pretty much loosely disguised theft. This is…

Borrow to own

This is similar to making payments on a piece of furniture till you own it (rent to own). The major difference here is that ‘borrow to own’ is when people borrow your things and intentionally never give it back. This usually happens when you loan out stuff you don’t use anymore, so you forget you loaned it out. Example “Hey, don’t worry about buying that $200 textbook, my sister has one from last year and we can just borrow to own!”

For all you students who have an aversion to theft (I’m hoping all of you!) there is one other plan of attack. What about just going on a good old…

Saving Spree

The opposite of a shopping spree. You live according to a carefully planned budget that minimises on spending to maximise saving. Example “I’m on a temporary saving spree until I have enough money for an iPhone 4… No lunch, no midday V, no new clothes. The iPhone better be bloody worth it!” Well that’s all for Word(s) of the Week this time. Just remember, if anyone catches you stealing their pens, you can’t blame it on me!

issue 08 2011

Now that’s what I call Volume Eight

horoscopes ARIES (March 21-April 19)

Now Laughing

New Zealand International Comedy Festival

Seriously, make sure you check out at least one show at the comedy festival this month. Even if it’s only $10 to see a young up-and-comer, chances are, they’ll be funnier than you (or I). Last year I saw Hannah Gadsby, Steve Wrigley and the year before I saw Arj Barker and all of them had me crying with laughter. If you’re short on cash but still want to see a bunch of comedians, check out the Best of the Billys, which has seven comedians for the price of one and a half. Much better than the standard dinner and a movie date.

Now Planning

A Winter Getaway

We may be fresh from Easter break right now, but we’re in for a long, rough ride till the end of semester. With assignments and tests filling the pages of our diaries, our lives are soon going to slip into a black hole of due dates. So to help you plough through, make sure there’s a light at the end of the tunnel. Life won’t seem so bleak when you’ve got a Queenstown skiing holiday or a week in Oz to look forward to. We have four weeks off in June/July so there’s plenty of potential, especially if you keep an eye out for deals. So start saving and make Grab-a-seat your homepage for the next month!

Now Shopping ASOS.com

This website will soon become both your best friend and your worst enemy. Aimed at 16-34 year old men and women ASOS is a UK online retailer that offers over 35,000 own label and branded fashion items. It may seem a little pricey at first but head straight to the ‘Outlet’ section where there’s hundreds of clothes, shoes, accessories at hugely reduced prices. Brands such as MANGO, Kookai and Lipsy feature regularly. And the best part? Shipping is FREE. And they also offer free returns if you’re not happy with what you’ve ordered. So what are you waiting for? Get amongst it.

Now Eating

Packed Lunches

As students we spend way too much money on food (and alcohol). If we’re going to be saving for a winter holiday or shopping for cool new threads we’re going to need the dough. So cut back on the maccas and start bringing in your own food. It may be a bit naff to pull out your marmite sammie when everyone else is ordering pasta and sushi, but you’ll have the last laugh when you can finally afford that new pair of jeans or those platform boots you and your friends have been perving on for weeks.

A member of your family will be spreading rumours about you this week. My money’s on the shady uncle.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) Save power! Sleep all day!

GEMINI (May 21-June 21)

The stars see a pair of queens in your future this week. Head down to the casino!

CANCER (June 22-July 22)

Your energy levels will be amping this week. Fuel it with Red Bull, espresso and a bag of sherbet.

LEO (July 23-August 22)

The lines will blur between fantasy and reality this week. Beware of dogs wearing shoes.

VIRGO (August 23-September 22)

You want more of the finer things in life, like double rainbows and kittens playing with dolphins. Unfortunately, you won’t find any of that shit in Auckland. Make YouTube your happy place this week.

LIBRA (September 23-October 23)

The stars can see how many creme eggs you had this Easter and they’re judging you.

SCORPIO (October 24-November 21)

You may think texting someone 100 times a day is loving, but the stars suggest that you may be a stalker.

SAGITTARIUS (November22-Dec21)

You were struck with Bieber fever over the holidays. Don’t worry, if you put yourself in quarantine this week you may still be able to make friends by 2015.

CAPRICORN (December 22-January 19)

Screw fashion, make all your clothing out of duvets and faux mink blankets this week for the ultimate in warmth chic.

AQUARIUS (January 20-Febuary 18)

The stars predict that this week you’ll wake up, do a bunch of stuff at uni, eat some food and have a few sleeps. Monotonous, much?

PISCES (Febuary 19-March 20)

Just because the royal wedding’s over, doesn’t mean you need to stop wearing oversized hats.

If you think you’re on the pulse with what’s happening in Auckland, email debate@aut.ac.nz with your own Suggestions.

www.ausm.org.nz

27.

by Heather Rutherford Before Kathryn Wilson came along, the New Zealand footwear scene was looking pretty bleak. For our shoes, when not wearing jandals, we mostly looked to Australian or overseas designers and even then, there was never a wide range of choice available. Our own fashion apparel design industry has been well developed for years with the likes of Karen Walker, Zambesi, Nom*D and so forth but up until Wilson came along, no footwear designer had yet managed to make resounding fashion waves. On a worldwide scale, fashion designers specialising in high end footwear is no new concept. French designer Christian Louboutin has made a career out of this vocation for over a decade, and thanks to Sex and the City, we have all heard of Manolo Blahnik. But these designers are based out of the likes of Paris, have stores in New York, and stock in all the high end department stores all around the world. The whole concept of a fashion designer, who specialises in only shoes, is a concept that would have previously been deemed just a bit far-fetched in a social climate such as New Zealand. Being a small country do we even have the population base to support such a specialised fashion industry niche on a wide scale? And in a country notorious for its population’s tatty footwear choices (yes it’s true) will we even be interested? A few short years ago, these questions would have been very valid. That was until the arrival of Kathryn Wilson on the fashion scene. You don’t have to look far to see proof of her success in New Zealand, with stockists in every major city or town in the North and South Island as well as throughout Australia. As well as the obvious commercial success, the fashion industry as a whole has started to realise and take note of this shoe design trailblazer. In 2002 Wilson won the AMP ‘Do Your Thing’ Scholarship which set her on the right track to success. And to top it off, during last year’s 10th anniversary of New Zealand Fashion Week, Kathryn Wilson became the first New Zealand fashion designer to have a fashion show devoted entirely to shoes. Not only does this signify a massive change in the fashion consciousness of New Zealanders, it also opens the gates for new budding footwear designers to set up alongside. And not just footwear designers, but handbags, hats, accessories and more will now find a more receptive audience and cliental to more design-focused fashion. As she still continues to go strong, I caught up with designer Kathryn Wilson to talk about success, winning the AMP scholarship and of course, shoes. You design shoes; not exactly the most obvious career choice for a young designer in New Zealand. What was it that drew you to design footwear over clothing or anything else? I have had a love affair with shoes since I was young and after working part-time at Andrea Biani shoes while I was a teenager I realised I had an interest in the design and manufacture of footwear. I enjoy the challenge of learning the technical aspects of construction and use of technology and machinery developed specifically for the trade. I also realised early on throughout my studies that I needed to have a point of difference from other students in my Bachelor of Design degree so that I could gain employment once graduated.

Hopefully other design graduates are encouraged to enter the industry and create a reputation for New Zealand footwear design. We have such a strong presence in fashion design internationally and there’s no reason why we can’t be known for footwear also. It’s an exciting time as communication between Asia is becoming easier and more accessible with technology and affordable travel etc.

In the wake of your success, a lot of young New Zealanders would surely love to follow in your ‘footsteps’. Where did you learn the technical and design skills needed to be a master of your trade? I’m still learning each season! I studied footwear product, packaging design and trend prediction papers in the UK while on an exchange to Nottingham Trent University. The rest I have picked up along the way, while asking as many questions as possible to specialists and technicians in the factories.

Obviously a good designer has a strong personal design signature or style in their body of work. How would you describe your own design philosophy or style? Innovative, playful, unique and bold. We enjoy the idea that Kathryn Wilson shoes are a signature look and that they are recognised for being colourful and extremely comfortable.

Your success and prominence as a New Zealand footwear designer has surely changed the face of the New Zealand shoe design and the fashion industry. Where do you see the industry heading over the next few years?

28.

Where do you ideally see yourself and your own business heading over the next few years? We will be focusing on our exports sales over the next 18 months and hope to be supplying Hong Kong, Japan and USA within the next five years.

Has it changed or developed over the years at all? I had always hoped we could offer shoes that are not already available on the market in New Zealand, developed on a philosophy of timeless, sophisticated design with a point of difference. In 2002 you won the prestigious AMP ‘Do Your Thing’ scholarship. What made you decide to apply for this?

I was recommended this scholarship programme from a friend. I was told that the awards were open to entries of any age, from any industry, and applicants should have a goal in life that they were striving to achieve. It sounded like a perfect opportunity to gain financial support and advice at the time when I was ready to launch my career in shoe design. How did the scholarship influence or change your career? It gave me a great amount of confidence and self-belief knowing that a big financial corporation such as AMP believed in me enough to support my idea and passion, enabling me to launch my own shoe brand and sample my first designs with New Zealand factory. I truly believe I would not have had the courage and resources to follow my dream to design shoes at such a young age of 22 without the support of this scholarship from AMP. I still work closely with the advisors and marketing specialists in the Auckland AMP office who are there to offer advice and contacts on all areas of my business. Lastly, what is the best advice you can think to give young designers of tomorrow on how to break into the elusive New Zealand fashion industry? ‘Do your thing’! If you choose a job you love, you’ll never have to work a day in your life. For more information on the AMP Scholarships and how to enter, head to www.doyourthing.co.nz. Entries are open until May 31, 2011. issue 08 2011

Biutiful

Directed by Alejandro Gonzalez Inarritu Film Review by Danielle Witburn

(A)

The scene is stillness. The child’s hand wears a diamond ring. Father and daughter lie in bed reminiscing about their heritage, a close family shot. It is a spot of peacefulness, but it is one of the only within Biutiful, the latest Inarritu film featuring our latest on-screen lady-killer, Javier Bardem. Except in this film, Bardem isn’t so much lady-killer as nappywearer. An absorbing portrayal of life on Barcelona’s hard-worn streets, Biutiful tells the story of Uxbal (Bardem), an outwardly shady man with an inwardly pure heart. The ghetto which he calls home is a world-class example of crime, corruption, and exploitation; the feelings motioned by Uxbal, his broken family, and those around him are raw and real – the only motions they go through are the ones they need to stay alive. Uxbal himself is rather hard to pin down. A peripheral gangster, an aid worker, a dedicated father, a businessman, and a man who takes money in exchange for parents to hear the dying words of their children are all true, but conflicting, descriptions. Uxbal lives on the edge of life and death, both metaphorically and physically. Death as an everyday facet in his low-decile neighbourhood is one factor; his mausoleum visits, accidental part in a mass death, and role as an orphan is another. Yet Uxbal, too, is dying. His perspective changes quite slowly after he discovers his own demise: his imminent death is just another fact of life, the burnt crust on his daily bread. It all seems very primal. One of the things I find most Biutiful (mind the pun) about this film is, forecasted in its initial scenes, its stillness. There is no distracting, mind-numbing sound to go with it, the sound that blots out the humanity of a film and makes it some American circus blockbuster featuring Adam Sandler. Simplicity is beautiful, and this film knows it. I suppose what makes it intensely watchable (and actually quite captivating; you do find the time slipping away under you and your prerequisite popcorn) is that in itself, the film is actually so complex that its silence makes it profound, rather than boring. It is certainly one of those cinematic treats that take your mind hostage for some time afterwards. The mentioning of the cast somehow seems secondary to the content. There are many characters, the most central (and they would have to be for a film on a family man) his family, and a couple of other families surrounding him. Uxbal is certainly not lacking in family drama or unhappiness, but it is the love and protection that he gives them which gives his definitely-notnuclear family cohesion. The sense of what he has lost in his own childhood adds metaphorical imagery that, like many other instances in the film, rotates and reappears to make sense of the intangible, the misunderstood, and the indecipherable. It is beautifully circular, like life itself, and carries its inconsistencies and ironies upon itself like the scars on a heart. Watch it and you will see why Bardem won best actor at Cannes.

CMY

That wasn’t a stutter...just simple reinforcement of the facts. When we say we’re a Kiwi label, we actually mean it, and everything stamped with the wearingJACK name, is 100% designed, cut, sewn and printed here in lil’old NZ. Our laid-back tees, singlets and hoods are cut to perfection and feature sweet prints from designers around NZ. And are they crafted in shoddy sweatshops with third world toddlers working their scrawny backsides off? No, no, no. We pay real adults with the smarts and skill to make quality threads that’ll last longer than a steak at a vegan BBQ.

www.wearingjack.co.nz Upload a pic of you with this ad to www.facebook.com/wearingJACK & be in to win a FREE tee. SPECIAL OFFER

Use coupon code MATESRATES at checkout for a mean 20%* discount until the end of May. www.ausm.org.nz

*applies to products not already discounted

29.

Just Go With It

Directed by Dennis Dugan Film Review by Nicola Monera

(C-)

While sitting through Just Go With It, you can’t help but notice there’s something rather familiar about this film. The plot’s the same, the central characters are the same, and then ding!, you realise it’s every movie Jennifer Aniston and Adam Sandler ever made mashed into one predictable, tediously long and shitty rom com. Sandler plays a womanising surgeon (lol) named Danny, who pretends to be in a failed marriage to get pity sex from women. By putting on a fake wedding ring and hitting the bars, Danny manages to score some freakishly hot 20-ish-year-olds every night. The tables turn however when Danny meets Palmer, played by swimsuit model Brooklyn Decker, who falls for him without his wedding ring trick. The two have a romantic evening on the beach, which abruptly ends the morning after when Palmer finds Danny’s fake wedding ring in his pocket. Convinced he’s a lying cheating bastard of a husband, Palmer breaks it off with Danny no questions asked. As telling the truth would make the film end at 20 minutes, Danny of course spins an elaborate lie about getting a divorce. Trapped in this stupid lie and wanting to impress Palmer, Danny desperately convinces his secretary Katherine (Aniston) to the play the part of his soon-to-be former wife. And as the lies grow deeper, Katherine’s children get roped into being Danny’s fake kids. Eventually somehow, they all end up going to Hawaii for a family vacation, which of course gets out of control. Nicole Kidman’s performance as Katherine’s psycho frenemy Devlin is this film’s only saving grace from getting a D. She is refreshingly and unexpectedly hilarious, and brought out some genuine laughs from the crowd. So snaps for her. Otherwise, this film is recommended for strictly Aniston/Sandler/ Kidman crazed fans, or anyone who voluntarily wants to lose a bunch of brain cells. “Just Bare Through It” would have been a more fitting name.

30.

Justin Bieber Never Say Never Directed by Jon Chu

Film Review by Samantha McQueen (B-)

There’s only a certain kind of person who can make a movie about their (short) life, that will only appeal to people who have little source of income and have it become the highest grossing concert-themed film in the US. That person is Justin Bieber. Chances are, this review isn’t going to make you rush out to watch the pint-sized, androgynous singer in all of his 3D glory. But he must be doing something right; the theatre I’m sitting in to watch Never Say Never has started a chant of “when I say Justin, you say Bieber. JUSTIN! BIEBER! JUSTIN! BIEBER!” and everyone is joining in. The two 10-yearolds next to be look like they’re about to wet themselves – and the film hasn’t even started yet. For those who think that “Bieber fever” is only something that happens in the States, sit in a theatre when this film is playing and marvel at the hysteria. The film itself isn’t a cinematic masterpiece by any means, and the only reason it’s playing in cinemas around the world is because whatever Justin touches turns to gold. Even calling this a documentary is a stretch; there may be interviews with everyone from his parents to his seventh grade teacher, but there is rarely any face time with boy wonder himself. And the hard questions are never answered, like whether he writes his songs himself or what he really thinks of all the obsessive tweens. Die-hard fans won’t learn anything new, but for Bieber foreigners, they’re given a glimpse at how he went from the angelic Canadian who played drums on a kitchen chair to selling out the most famous concert arena in the world. It’s almost like an E! True Hollywood Story, but with better camera direction and no scandal. Still, director Jon Chu (responsible for the Step Up sequels) knows what the fans want is a backstage glimpse into their idol’s world, and he gives them that in spades. You get to see his old haunts in Stratford, including his room at his grandparent’s house. There’s the vocal lessons, the costume changes (is that a bare chest they see?) and of course, the home videos and baby photos that will melt girl’s

prepubescent hearts. There’s even the “dramatic” tension among his team when his vocal chords are swollen and they have to cancel a show two days out from Madison Square Garden. It’s a bit redundant though, seeing as the whole “countdown to The Garden” is contrasted with clips from the very concert they’re working towards. By the time he arrives on stage, the show is almost over. Not that the girls care though; they’re so wired on hormones and the occasional shirtless shot that Chu could have made a film about the Biebs eating a slice of pizza and they would have spontaneously combusted. Still, Chu manages to milk the power of “Bieber fever” for all its worth – there’s even a slow mo hair flip midway through the film that sends the girls beside me into tears. If you’re a Bieber loather rather than a lover, don’t bother torturing yourself by watching this film. Even if you are curious, wait for it to come out on DVD. The wrath of screaming teenage girls – and the loss of hearing – isn’t worth it.

Scream 4

Directed by Wes Craven Film Review by Hayley Burrows

(A+)

I saw this film opening night and I had high expectations. I mean HUGE! I have been a Scream fan for years and have dying for the chance to see it on the big screen. Scream 4 was everything I hoped it would be and more! Clearly the audience agreed as we all clapped three different times throughout the film. It was awesome. All the main characters revised their roles with Neve Campbell as Sidney Prescott, David Arquette as Dewey Riley and Courtney Cox as Gale Weathers. Only this time there is a younger supporting cast, lead by Emma Roberts and Hayden Panettiere. The film starts off 10 years after the last film and no Ghostface killings have occurred since then. That is until Sidney returns to the town of Woodsboro on the final tour of her book launch. The killings start as soon as she steps foot in town, the only difference being that they seem to be centred around her cousin Jill Roberts (Emma Roberts). It’s her friends that are slowly being killed, one by one. Is history repeating itself? Sid sure thinks so! The film goes on with the audience convinced they know who the

issue 08 2011

killer is this time, only to be completely slapped in the face when the real killer shows their face. Screenwriter Kevin Williamson has upped his game with this film. It not only had me clutching on to my friend’s arm and grabbing the stranger next to me, it also made me laugh. Scream 4 puts itself right back on top of its game, where it can proudly stand side by side with its original. It was amazing, a new Scream film for a new generation. People not fond of the film before will be left wanting to hire out the old films and watch it all from the start. Emma Roberts does a surprisingly superb job (obviously related to Julia Roberts). The only downside for me was Hayden Panettiere’s hair. It was so distracting throughout the entire film I almost wished she was the killer so I wouldn’t have had to see her face. You will be left buzzing after the film, its builds up the scream and you will be left on a high. Maybe even high enough to prank call your friends in your best Ghostface impression…. It’s what we did.

Source Code

Directed by Duncan Jones Film Review by James Wheeler

(B+)

Jeffrey Wright play characters that communicate and control the Source Code. On a lighter note, comedian Russell Peters also appears in the film as a citizen on the train who is looking to make it big as a comedian. Duncan Jones should be praised for his direction. The pace of the film varies throughout and always grabs you and forces you to watch. The emphasis on the past and changing things for a better outcome is an integral theme that Jones looked to amplify. This is probably the biggest theme of the film in my opinion. Anyone who has ever looked back on an event, a moment, a conversation, and wished they could have done something different will have an immediate connection to Gyllenahaal’s character. Gyllenhaal stands out as Captain Stephens but both Vera Farmiga and Jeffrey Wright annoyed me the entire film. It may seem like I’m bashing them as actors but you’d be wrong. Being secretive was the purpose of their characters, they had to contain information rather than release it. This just meant the actors accomplished their job. I also didn’t enjoy some of the dialogue. Some lines were extremely cheesy and cringe-worthy. If you can get past this tiny little detail then I’m sure it’ll be okay. Especially for any Gyllenhaal lovers who probably be focusing on him and won’t care what he is saying anyway. Source Code is something different. It will provoke thought while showcasing some great action. I’d call it a sci-fi/action mesh which utilises the collective talent of a small cast to extract maximum response from the viewer. There are a few scenes that may even get a tear or two out of some viewers. Movie-goers should come out of the theatre thinking they got value for their money, which is pretty hard to do these days.

Infuriatingly for all your comic lovers reading this, I know nothing of the comic to compare it. All I know is that Paramount are lining up their Marvel ducks – Thor, Iron Man and Captain America – in preparation for an ensemble film. I picked up one Iron Man reference; I’m sure there were many more. If any uber fans discovered some hidden references in the film – do share! Ex-Home and Away beach bum Chris Hemsworth beefed up big time to take the title role opposite Natalie Portman. Both play it casually and cute, which works well with the cheeky dialogue and helps to set the film apart from other comicturned-movie films. Following in the footsteps of fellow galah Russell Crowe, Hemsworth holds his own as a superhero and, like Russell, is one of the few actors that can fight while wearing a cape and still look cool. His future will be bright. Surprising cameos by Jeremy Renner (Hurt Locker) and a stellar support cast that boasts Anthony Hopkins, Stellan Skarsgård (Angels and Demons) and Kat Dennings (Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist) makes the film accessible to a wider audience. The 3D was the biggest low light of the whole thing. Rain and snow were about the only things they got right. Save your money and watch it in 2D, you won’t be missing anything.

Bruno Mars

Live at Vector Arena, April 18 Concert Review by Jess Etheridge

(A)

He may be short but he sure packs a performance punch. Bruno Mars graced our shores during Source Code takes the viewer on a journey from university holidays for a one-off, intimate gig at start to finish. You’ll see action, crime, sci-fi, Vector Arena on April 18 and left nothing to the a love story and at the heart of it all, a deep imagination. thinking drama. The action starts with a man The crowd may have been smaller than a Lady waking up on a train, unaware of where he is Thor Gaga concert but the air was still filled with or even who he is. Eight minutes later the train Directed by Kenneth Branagh ear-piercing screams and nauseating teenage explodes, killing everyone on board. Here is Film Review by Rebecca Williams (B+) hormones. Mars, a pop singer who has made where the film really begins. We learn that Jake crooning cool again, treated his audience to over Gyllenhaal is a U.S soldier on an assignment an hour of his own hits, as well as having a go at a to prevent a terrorist attack from taking place few classic pop mash-ups. in Chicago. How? Through Source Code, a top Opening the show with a stripped down version secret project that allows a person to enter the of The Other Side, a song he collaborated on with short term memory of a deceased person and Cee-Lo Green on Mars’ Doo-Wops & Hooligans, got see life through their eyes for the final eight fans racing and hands scrambling, trying to get minutes of their life. An interesting concept but closer to the pint-sized party popper. does it have potential as a film? I trudged along to Thor expecting to have my soul As quickly as he stole the audience’s hearts, he The principle cast is Jake Gyllenhaal, Michelle sucked out Sucker Punch style but I was pleasantly jumped into more of his upbeat tracks for a change Monaghan, Vera Farmiga and Jeffrey Wright. entertained. The film is fast-paced, well-cast and of pace, using dance and pelvic thrusts to entertain It’s a small cast, but collectively they all really enjoyable. the audience. Then Mars committed musical perform rather well. Jake stars as captain Colter After letting his ego get the best of him, Thor is blasphemy by not only playing but mashing Stephens, a soldier thrown into the middle banished to Earth where he finds a way to redeem Nirvana and Michael Jackson together – live. of a mission he doesn’t recognise. Michelle himself, save the planet and get the girl. It’s not What resulted was a Smells Like Billie Jean mashMonaghan plays Christina, a woman on the rocket science, but it is really fun to watch if you up of epic proportions. Bruno knows how to play a train within the Source Code. Vera Farmiga and can suspend your disbelief. guitar well but some of the Billie Jean notes seemed

www.ausm.org.nz

31.

to be a bit too high for the singer to hit. Mars then tackled his own version of Nothing On You, a B.o.B song he worked on, and chose one lucky girl in the front row to sing the final line to. He swiftly changed into his number one single Grenade and dedicated the same song to the front row girl, sending a few mixed messages that’s for sure. The most anticipated song of the night was Marry You, a song about getting married on a whim after a few shots of Patron. The song has never been a single but is so popular because it featured on Glee late last year. With synchronised dance moves and energetic backing musicians, Bruno brought the swing and the sass of his 1960s-inspired hit to the arena. After rounding off the show with Just The Way You Are, which seemed to drag out for 10 minutes longer than it actually is, a screaming and desperate audience pleaded for an encore. Their efforts were rewarded with one final song, Runaway, and then Bruno had to leave for good. There were tears and foot-stamping but it was over, as he assured the audience he’d be back another time and quickly disappeared into the darkness. A lively and fun show, Bruno Mars was definitely one of the highlights of this year’s events calendar. And at $70 a pop, it was affordable too.

32.

Deadmau5-headlined the Our House dance event

his set, Deadmau5 put everyone in a trance with Strobe. The audience compiled of some interesting Live at Vector Arena, April 21 characters that were all enthusiastic and ready Concert Review by Nicola Monera (A) to party, making the environment even better to Words can’t describe how absolutely phenomenal be in. People really made an effort to dress up, as this concert was. In fact, the Deadmau5 show there were a few people with their own versions can’t really be classified as a concert per say, but more a full-on sensational experience for the eyes of Deadmau5’s head, thousands of people with glowsticks, girls dressed in mini-mouse costumes, and ears. Deadmau5, aka Canadian producer Joel and of course that random token guy rocking Zimmerman, had the whole of Vector Arena in the morph suit. Needless to say, the team from the palm of his hand – not just with a heavy base St Johns had their hands full with some of out of line, but also with crazy lights and videos that control delinquents. stimulated the senses. However, I must mention that before the show, When Deadmau5 finally got on stage, sporting Vector could have managed the lines to get in his signature oversized mouse head (made from better. As expected, a hoard of keen ravers amassed silver reflectors), the crowd went insane. His set at the Vector gates causing a massive line around up resembled a futuristic spaceship command the block. People were bottle necked into a small deck, which had jaw-dropping digital graphics and explosions of LED lights. This combined with security checkpoint area, which felt like being epic cartoon-like graphics on a massive screen and herded like sheep. Some people had to wait an rows of blasting lights behind him made for a great hour to get in and others had to wait an hour to get their ticket. To the event management’s visual experience. His two hour set had a blend credit though there was free water and Vector was of his classic trance/electro style including crowd favourites like Ghosts and Stuff, I Remember, Reward sufficiently air conditioned, making it less sweaty and hot. I also found that this big great venue was Is Cheese and Some Chords, as well as playing a perfect for this event, as it was spacious even at the previously unreleased mix of Raise Your Weapon. front. He also dropped a lot of heavy dubstep, which All round, the event was a fabulou5 audio and was unexpected but fun. He had the whole house visual experience where you had to be a witness to amping so hard that even those in the seated areas were dancing up against the rails. Following understand the true scale of its awesomeness.

issue 08 2011

Spot the Difference

Correctly identify the five differences in the two photos then circle them and drop your entry into your nearest AuSM office, or the box on the side of the red debate stands, or post to debate PO Box 6116 Wellesley St before 12pm Thursday. What’s up for grabs? Two “squawk burgers” vouchers for Velvet Burger on Fort St, Auckland CBD. Congratulations to our issue 7 winner, Jessamy Acket from City campus.

Name Phone # Email Campus

Thinking about postgraduate study? Join us for Postgraduate Week at New Zealand’s leading university*. From 16-20 May The University of Auckland is providing free information sessions, displays and presentations from academics and postgraduate advisers to give you everything you need to know about studying for a world-class qualiﬁcation with us. We look forward to welcoming you.

16 20

MAY

Monday - Postgraduate Pathways Tuesday - Business and Economics, Education, Engineering, Law Wednesday - Science, Arts, Medical and Health Sciences Thursday - Education, National Institute of Creative Arts and Industries (NICAI) Throughout the week - Lunchtime lecture seminars, special exhibits, concerts & presentations

KingSt10506_DEB_A

* See www.auckland.ac.nz/leadinguniversity

For a full programme and to register visit:

www.auckland.ac.nz/postgradweek www.ausm.org.nz

33.

Lani McIsaac

Bachelor of Communication Studies

What are your thoughts on the new copyright law that will affect downloading from September? Stupid. Especially considering one of the politicians that passed the bill was caught with illegally copied music. Everyone now has illegal copies. It’s turning everyday New Zealanders into criminals How often do you download music, movies or TV shows from the internet (not from a paid source, like iTunes) and why? Hardly ever - I just grab movies off friends’ computers What is the worst thing about returning to uni after a two week break? School kids cramming buses, trains etc again What is your number one reason for staying at home rather than flatting? I’m from Napier, so wish I could live at home! It’s really hard to survive up here flatting; I’ve considered dropping out a couple of times because it is so hard financially Rugby, basketball or royal wedding - what did you watch Friday night? Rugby or basketball, cause I know people working for/in both

Rocky Mak

Bachelor of International Hospitality Management

What are your thoughts on the new copyright law that will affect downloading from September? It sends many on a guilt trip How often do you download music, movies or TV shows from the internet (not from a paid source, like iTunes) and why? That depends, but no more than twice a month on music off TV shows How many creme eggs did you eat over the Easter break? None. I’m not a fan of gooey chocolate What is your number one reason for staying at home rather than flatting? Cheaper as I am still looking for part-time work, and I am not that good at looking after myself in the domestic front Rugby, basketball or royal wedding - what did you watch Friday night? None of them. I don’t have Sky, and by the time the Royal Wedding start[ed], I [was] half asleep

Jasmine Bradley

Bachelor of International Hospitality Management

What are your thoughts on the new copyright law that will affect downloading from September? People will find ways around it How often do you download music, movies or TV shows from the internet (not from a paid source, like iTunes) and why? Probably a few songs a week (ones I just can’t get out my head) How many creme eggs did you eat over the Easter break? About two, didn’t see that many around What is the worst thing about returning to uni after a two week break? Knowing exams are coming up along with more assignments and no more loooong sleep ins What is your number one reason for staying at home rather than flatting? Cheaper. Spent $350 on makeup yesterday. No way could I have done that two months ago when I was flatting

Watchout for debate around campus - you could be the next micro-celeb!

34.

Romelo Joseph

Bachelor of Business

What are your thoughts on the new copyright law that will affect downloading from September? Stupidly idiotic and doesn’t make human sense. And doesn’t really deserve to be asked as a question because it’s stupid, so so stupid How often do you download music, movies or TV shows from the internet (not from a paid source, like iTunes) and why? That’s all I do. Can’t remember the last time I bought something like that How many creme eggs did you eat over the Easter break? Sadly none, watching my figure What is the worst thing about returning to uni after a two week break? What break?? No one told me there was a break What is your number one reason for staying at home rather than flatting? I wish I lived at home. But if I did I would just stay there for the wonderful support emotionally and most importantly financially and food-wise from my family

issue 08 2011

www.ausm.org.nz

35.

5% EE DI K TI O O N N LY A ! L

A W D IS

N A

SA V

Great specials on Student Training Packs

Paramedic Pack Usually $156.59 Now only

Midwifery Pack

$148.76 each

Nurse Pack

Usually $156.59

Usually $123.69

Now only

$148.76 each

$117.50 each

Paramedic Pack includes: Midwifery Pack includes: Nurse Pack includes: - Prolite Stethoscope - Prolite stethoscope - Prolite stethoscope - Dual tube Aneroid Sphygnomanometer - Dual tube Aneroid Sphygnomanometer Dual tube Aneroid Sphygnomanometer - Vertical Responder Jnr Holster - Foetal stethoscope Disposable Pupil Torch - Disposable Pupil Torch - Dressing scissors Dressing scissors - Dressing Scissors - Digital thermometer Digital thermometer - Medicut Cutting shears - Key ring CPR face shield - Key ring CPR face shield - Key ring CPR face shield

Specials available until 8/5/11 or while stocks last. All prices NETT - no further discounts apply.

AUT City Campus AUT Akoranga Campus 55 Wellesley Street East, Auckland City 90 Akoranga Drive, Northcote Tel: 366 4550 Fax: 366 4570 Tel: 489 6105 Fax: 489 7453 Email: aut.city@ubsbooks.co.nz Email: aut.akoranga@ubsbooks.co.nz Web: www.ubsbooks.co.nz Open Monday to Friday or shop securely online 24/7 issue 08 2011 36.