Issue #2: Fear November 2016
It's fair enough to say that we all experience fear. Some may even believe that we often spend more time in a fearful situation or state of mind than in a safety. In this issue, we aim to talk about the whole spectrum of fear ranging from things like arachnophobia and specific fears through to bigger topics such as xenophobia, fear and marriage, consent and many more. We are also happy to announce that we have recruited a few new members to our zine Bette, Maria, Jack and Seb. Like before, we want you to absorb these ideas with an open mind in order to encourage and inspire your own creative work. Hopefully helping you to grow as people. Thanks for checking out what we do and we hope you enjoy reading it! Lara
Photos by Hannah Grieve
Definitions of Fear A wave that breaks over your head at midnight the intake of breath when a car stops two inches away Your heart becomes a caged dragonfly vibrating against the bars Jagged devoured fingernails A creeping fungus, orange as warning An unlit alleyway Or the decaying underside of hope - Kayla Bashe
Photos by Yasmin Ingham
I guess I can only really connect this topic back to me and how it affects me personally for me to have a say on it, so please excuse me for sounding like an egotistical, self absorbed, idiot, I have very broad and opposite spectrum of fear: hating spiders, and the fear of the inevitable, inescapable event that is death. They are two very different types of fear ENTIRELY but they both possess the notion that is fear inside of me. One I encounter any other week, the other I will find out at some, unexpected point in my life. With spiders, I hate the massive ones that always end up menacingly in the bath or on your bed and make me devise a quick, not always effective plan that will remove them from a close radius of myself, and also knowing they are scared too and will run as they are panicked and don't want to be hurt, which helps calm me down. I can deal with that. Now, on the complete other side of that spectrum, the fear of death is a much more throat gripping, hands clenching fear that I can switch off but always comes back to haunt me. That doesn't make me or anyone stupid for fearing it; it makes us human. Death is such a massive topic up for debate so I won't go into full depth on my many, ever changing thoughts on it but if you're scared and in fact just human; know you're not alone. We all go in the end, and many before us have. That's something spiders have in common, I guess.
Maria Beardall 17 Year old blogger, dog lover and Instagrammer Favourite quote about Fear: Fear is a superpower
Jack Barber Loves Supreme and Palace. Listens to Tyler the Creator and Yung Lean Takes retro style film photos
This is one of Seb's customised skateboard decks at a disused airport in Berlin. He usually build or modifies skateboards adding his own artistic flair.
Seb Andreas Record Loves Gary Numan and skateboarding "I'd say I'm creative because I love to think of a design in my head and then build it and make it a reality."
Photo by Hannah Grieve
Bette Davies
After meeting in the back streets of Brighton. We recruited Bette to join our zine team. With a love for photography, drawing, poetry, filming and playing bass. We knew she had to join our team.
By Laina Deene
Photos by Jack Barber, Bella Fernandez & Seb Andreas Record
Combatting Uni Fears For me adulthood is a big flashy and neon billboard sign that has words "mature", "independent", "professional", "daring" and most of all *shudders* "responsible" Majority of us may relate to this so I opened up this topic because it’s sooner than we think it is. In my case, I’m eyeing on the chance to be able to move out during my time in university. Questions such as where I go and what course I am doing would through my head 24/7 to the point that it gave me a literal headache. The first step for me is establishing what course I really wanted to pursue, because it ultimately it leads me to the bigger picture which is my future job (ugh jobs) But how am I supposed to know what I really wanna be at age 18? How can other people seem to act so calm about the uncertainty? Second stage is of course, moving out. There are 2 types of fear: fear of your new surroundings and fear of how you cope with it. It can be anything from intimidating older students, to grades, or new places. Or it can be as simple as afraid of living without parents or any responsible adult. It sounds fascinating and exciting to me at first the thought of no rules and supervision. But I'd surely feel lost and shaken knowing that no one will ultimately make decisions but me. BUT. ME. Plus the amount of work load we need to put in order to fund ourselves in uni, as well as the actual uni work load we need to do twice as hard on (Am I successfully scaring you guys? It is a Halloween themed issue after all.) Article by Kyle Duyungan Photos by Hannah Grieve & Lara Antoine
All these seem to be a handful of stress but with the negatives there are always positives. The good news is we can deal with that. So I came up with 3 reminders that you guys may want to hear at this point in your lives . 1. To go out and see. Once you’re out there, the world is your oyster! You can do you and seize opportunities you’ve always wanted to take. Being out of your comfort zone every once in a while is never a bad decision, in fact it might just be the best decision you ever made! 2. Learn from the pros. And yes I’m talking about our parents, relatives and even role models. Keeping an eye or lending an ear on their mature values will help us understand the "adult world" better 3. Embrace it. One time, I was the oldest one among 2 other colleagues at work and I felt so responsible for them. I had the biggest fear of knowing that if something goes wrong, I was to blame because I was "the adult." I tried the method "fake it till I make it" and so pretended to take the challenge head on, and nothing went wrong! That day I learned that sometimes you just have to act like it, and the next thing you know you're adulting like a pro! Extra reminder know that you're never alone in this and I mean NEVER. Your age group is literally in the same crisis as you are in this everyone just copes with it in a different way. But if you keep calm and believe that if they can do it, so can you. ^_^ .
Closed Doors Give Me Claustrophobia Walking through the deep, dark, dank room surrounded by emptiness. Compressing at every corner. Every crevice The pressure is too much to bare Is it even there? Fumbling around the place only feeling empty space The room is neither small nor large and I am not the one in charge A sour echo shudders through the room of which I once knew Another door right in my face Feeling helpless in this place I want to scream I want to cry Most of all I want to die At least then I can fly out of this hell of more missed opportunities the deeper I dwelll Poem by Lara Antoine Photos by Lara Antoine and Alex Anderson
Photo by Kyle Duyungan
Article and photo by Bette Davies
The little things can get me so much more than the typical big things - like the fear of being stared at whilst waiting for the train and how it holds me back from even wanting to get on it. Or asking for help during work. But don't let that fear stop you - take a deep breath and face it, don't spend your life being in fear of fear.
One time when I was younger, I really wanted to go to this drama school so I begged my mum and she finally let me go. Then when I got there I was too scared to go in because I didn't know anyone.
Photos by Jack Barber
I can't actually walk down the path from my house cuz it's covered in things that I'm scared of. So some nights, in like the Winter, I have to walk the long way round or just not leave the house. It's really sad to be honest.
There was a spider infestation on NCS and dealing with them on the first night helped me overcome my fear.
At Truck Fest the fear of not being good enough of a fan or just being too awkward made me not go to the signing tent where Jack Savoretti was.
Photos by Alex Anderson
Be sure to check out his Facebook Page: Sebastian Schub Interview by Lara Antoine
Photos by Hannah Grieve
Photo by Bette Davies
Poem on Consent Dear 6 year olds, the ones who had their childhood taken from them at such a young age. The ones where your body was used for another humans privilege of a 30 second orgasm. This was not your fault. Dear 13 year olds, the ones where sex was a new thing to you and you had not known much about it before you were abused behind your school by men and women for their pleasure. This was not your fault. Dear 16 year old, the ones where your clothes were a little "too revealing", where your stomach may have been on show or the tip of your boobs may have slipped and you were blamed for being raped because of how you had dressed and when you went to report it you were made to believe that it was your fault. This was not your fault. Dear 20 years old, this is for you. The ones who went out on a Friday night expecting to have a good time with your mates getting drunk. But later being found at the bottom of a road with your trousers pulled down because someone spiked your drink. And were repeatedly blamed for drinking too much and not paying attention. This was not your fault. Dear 40 year olds, the ones who believe that you are too old to talk about what happened to you because you are classed as an "adult". What happened was not your fault and don't you dare let the person who did this to you get away with it. This was not your fault.
Dear younger me, the 14 year old. I'm sorry that you were forced to do stuff that you didn't want to. That the boy who you thought had liked you locked you in a room, took off your bra and played with the areas that you hadn't even explored yet. I'm sorry that I did not speak out about the abuse that you encountered for. This was not your fault. Dear those who have not spoken out about sexual abuse; tell someone. The abuser should not get away with this. And not matter what the circumstances were, you did not deserve the pain. No matter how much you drank, how much you turned them on, not matter how much skin you had shown. No is no, and no one deserves to go through the pain. This is not your fault. And lastly, how could I forget. Dear harassers, you ruined someone's life. You are the reason why people don't feel comfortable on going out by themselves. The reason that teenagers have to carry rape alarms on them. The reason that you let their self esteem run out of their body; you did this quicker than a runner winning a race. You are no longer going to get away with this, so don't believe you can. And lastly harasser, next time you see another person a sleep , drunk or revealing a part of their body you leave them the fuck alone. This was your fault. Yes is yes, no is no. Learn it and memorise it. From, The abused
Photo by Lara Antoine
Until death do us part...
blue Art by Sophie Kember
In general, I'd say going out at night is something I'm afraid of. I'd like to explore and stuff in the dark but I'm scared of getting raped or something
Photos by Alex Anderson Illustrations by Rebel Yuth
Fear resides on both sides of the border Existing is hard. Yet we all do it. We’re all living on the same planet fighting the same problems. We all face prejudice.
This takes toll on your educational expectations, what you wear (and unfortunately how that’s portrayed by other people) and even your mental health.
For some, it hits a lot harder than others it all On the other hand, there are further factors in which race creates a significant divide. I didn’t depends on the individual. We can’t compare the level of prejudice towards anyone of any want to bring it up but I realised that the fear flows ethnicity, gender identity, sexuality, ability, in both ways. We decided to leave the European religion or class. For example, whether you are a Union. There was a huge moral panic. Reports of White European woman who is an Atheist or a hate crime rocketed through the Earth’s White European woman who is a Christian. Your atmosphere. levels of prejudice will be different and incomparable it’s not an oppression People were driven by fear. competition. We should all help each other out. It was thought that there was a huge sense of However, one thing I’ll never understand is how Islamophobia as a result of various attacks going someone can have so much hatred, so much on within Europe; by voting to leave there was an resentment for another person based on their opportunity to reduce the chances of anything like complexion. Race has always divided people in that happening in the UK. Consequently, many some way especially in how we look at the Muslims are facing daily prejudice and being world. In a TEDtalk with Michael Kimmel he scapegoated not all Muslims are extremists. discussed a scenario in which two women were asked to describe what they saw when they Many Europeans and other ethnic minority groups looked in the mirror. The first woman said: have been victims of extremely outrageous and ‘When I look in the mirror, I see a woman.’ The even potentially lifethreatening xenophobic second woman said: ‘When I look in the mirror, I attacks because people are afraid that they’d see a black woman.’ Even in the most subtle cause some kind of threat to their lives. Yet Europeans who have lived in the UK all their lives way race has affected how these women view themselves. To have to view yourself as not just or have felt like a part of the ‘cosmopolitan’ British a ‘woman’ but a ‘black woman’ almost singles society are living with the incentive that they were you out like one is seen as the norm whereas never welcome there in the first place. Living with the other is different. a constant fear that they’d be attacked or their lives would be in jeopardy. Living with a fear of Also, as with many cultures, it comes with many being told to ‘Go back to their own country’, whilst negative stereotypes. Black women are often: standing in their place of birth. uneducated, hypersexual and overlyconfident or We need to do something about this because in other words ‘sassy’. fear
is residing on both sides of the border. In a ‘cosmopolitan’ world we should all be looking out for each other not tearing each other apart because of where we come from or the colour of our skin. So what can we do? Get talking about it. Raising awareness about what you feel needs to be done. You can do this by starting a hashtag like ‘#blacklivesmatter’ or ‘#freethenipple’ (not one of my favourite ideas but it’s a good place to start) You could also join/start a protest or even start a zine. Find other people that believe the same things as you. The more people you have the more consistent you can be because there’d be more opinions and ideas to help you change these stereotypical ideologies within your community. Accept the counterargument. You may not believe in it but you can’t become ignorant to it because less people would want to accept your ideas too. Just take everything with an open mind. Photos and article by Lara Antoine Protest hosted by PreQual (youthled proequality group from Brighton.) Keep uptodate with their projects & beliefs via their social media @Prequaluk
Photo by Hannah Grieve
These words are knives & often leave scars the fear of falling apart This is Gospel, Panic! at the Disco
If fear is in the mind then my mind lives in fear Turn to Dust, Wolf Alice
Photos by Bella Fernandez & Lara Antoine
Fear is a lie, if you know that you've got faith - Fear is a lie, Guvna B ft Hillsong Youth UK
http://avrazine.wixsite.com/avrazine
Contributors Social Media Hannah
Alex Instagram: @alexx_a5
Kyle Instagram: @klauriced
Instagram: @h.a.n.n.a.h.99
Laina
Yasmin
SEb
@lainamdeene_
@yasmin_ingham02
@legendaryseabass
Jack
John
Bette
Twitter: @theblankhand Instagram: j_barber69
@rebelyuth
Instagram: @banditry_mile @tre_imagery
Seb Schub
Zack
Facebook: Sebastian Schub
Soundcloud: Blnc
Lara
Bella Twitter: @bellawashere99 Instagram: @isabe11afernandez @placeslmao
Twitter: @larajklmnop Instagram: @lxrajklmnop Blog: www.larajklmnop.blogspot.co.uk
Maria
Twitter: @beardieeboo Instagram: @beardieeboo Blog: www.beardieeboo.blogspot.co.uk
Thanks for reading issue #2 of AVRA. We hope you enjoyed it. Issue #3 will be on Mental Health and Mindfulness. If you would like to contribute to this issue, email us: avra.zine@gmail.com Further details to follow on our social media/ website
Deadline: Thursday 15th December 2016