May / June 2014
F E A T U R E
RIVA TIMS Passionate Powerful and Persevering
Declutter Your Life WORSHIP AS YOU WORKOUT
HOW TO HANDLE SETBACKS Conquering the Storms of Life
Get Emotionally Healthy
Fighting Jesus-style inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
Where Have All the Children Gone Trilogy Part 1
GOD, WHERE IS MY HUSBAND?
WHY ARE YOU DOWNCAST? dealing with anxiety 1
may / june 2014
inspiredwomenmagazine.com Contributing Writers Karin Syren Jennifer Workman Tiffany Lynn Lepp Laurette Willis
in this issue
Barb Wiles
3 | Publisher’s Note
Ashley Marivitorri Gorman
4 | But God, Where Is Mine?
Natalie Hall
8 | Never Say Never
Mia Green
10 | Say No and Organize Your Life 15 | Transform you workouts into Worship!
inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
18 | Riva Tims: A Woman of Faith and Perseverance
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Dania Hernandez Ad Sales 305-720-5841 contact@inspiredwomenmagazine.com
23 | Wise Advice 24 | Where Have All the People Gone? 28 | Fighting Your Way Out Of Emotional Unhealthiness 31 | Anxiety a Weight too Heavy to Carry 34 | Spending Time with God 38 | The Emotional Side of Beauty
PUBLISHER’S NOTE
W
e all struggle with different emotions in our lives, but as women because of our physical make-up we seem to struggle a little more. Add everyday life situations to the hormonal component and we’ve got some potential for becoming emotionally unglued. Many people assume that because we are Christians we walk around happy all the time… the truth is, we are still human and we have historical experiences that contribute to how we deal with certain situations. So it’s important to rely on the Word and our faith in God to get us through trying times.
I pray that this edition will empower you to walk out into your season. May doors begin or continue to open widely and may you feel the peace of God as He leads you.
Be Inspired, inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
In this issue we feature Riva Tims as a great example of a woman who has weathered the storm through faith
and perseverance in a God she knew would see her through. We also have other articles to encourage us to get emotionally healthy. The goal is not to be free of the emotions but rather free from them controlling us and we can only do this through the help of God’s Holy Spirit.
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But God, Where Is Mine?
inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
By Karin Syren, Vision & Planning Coach
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The month of June is upon us, traditional month of lace and orange blossoms and you may be feeling the sting of singleness, wondering what is wrong with you, perhaps even questioning your faith, or worse yet, whether your heavenly Father has overlooked you! One of the ministries in which God has placed me is facilitator for our church’s Fresh Perspectives Recovery Programs. The Divorce and Relationship Recovery Program is one in which we identify and deal with the pain of failed relationships and participants learn accountability and to apply Scripture to the pain they may be suffering. That done, each group member makes a conscious decision to stop circling the mountain of disappointment and regret (Deuteronomy 2:3) and turn north, switching focus to the vision they have begun creating for the future, allowing it to draw them forward! During the journey northward, the ques-
tion of new and lasting relationships arises. It is at this point that each must learn to step very carefully for there are explosive landmines and subtly dangerous snares underfoot! A large part of the danger is the misconception under which most of us labor, thanks to society’s definition of single. The other part is the focus that results from buying into that misconception. A feeling deep in your soul says 1 You were half, now you’re whole. No more hunger and thirst But first be a person who needs people.2 I was in college when Funny Girl stormed Broadway and I too bought the premise that I 1 People from the musical Funny Girl. Writer(s): Music, Jule Styne, Lyrics, Bob Merrill. 2 Emphasis is mine
was somehow only half a person, fatally flawed and doomed to walk the earth visibly crippled and outcast, less than significant, without my other. Society suggests that we are not only abnormal, but that we must surely also be lonely. But loneliness, a normal longing for companionship and natural fleshly satisfaction, need not take center stage and interfere with time with your Maker/Husband. This essential “honeymoon” is one that must take place before your earthly marriage can be satisfactorily covenanted and consummated! Needing people and expecting them to ease our pain and fulfill our needs and desires is the world’s way, not the Kingdom way. The only Kingdom reason to need another person is to share the overflowing of God’s abundant love toward us, flowing through us into the world around us!
BEAST OR BLESSING?
of living which describes existing as a complete, functioning, nothing missing, nothing broken, effective unit in society. It is not a picture of lack! Singleness describes a state of completeness, maturity and perfection that is ideally attained before any healthy union with another person can be covenanted. Singleness is a state of oneness, unity, individuality. “Our God is one, or rather very oneness.”3 El-Shaddai is the all-sufficient God. Genesis 1:27 assures us we are created in that image, that same oneness. Though our flesh nature may desire union with another, spiritually we can only be complete in Christ, and there it must begin. Hear, O Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord is one! Deuteronomy 6:4 The Scriptural concept of single describes a state utterly beautiful in its simplicity and clarity. In Matthew 6:22 (KJV), single means “pure;
You may be surprised to learn that, singleness, as characterized in Scripture, is the state 3 Webster’s 1828 Dictionary
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sort that is, that peace] which transcends all understanding shall garrison and mount guard over your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.6 Philippians 4:7 (AMP) Paul teaches that singleness is a calling to such a state of oneness, wholeness, and completeness in Christ that it allows the single person to focus with a joyful intensity on God. Not everyone is called to such singleness for a lifetime, but all are called to a time of being set apart with Christ, a time of precious sanctification, a honeymoon, learning the maturity of singleness, before entering into meaningful relationship with another.
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simple; incorrupt; unbiased; having clear vision of divine truth”4 One definition lists “uncompounded; not double; not complicated; the “state of simplicity; sincerity; purity of mind or purpose; freedom from duplicity.5 Surely pure contentment follows this revelation.
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Not that I speak in regard to need, For I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content Philippians 4:11 NKJV
SINGLE uniqueNESS And God’s peace [shall be yours, that tranquil state of a soul assured of its salvation through Christ, and so fearing nothing from God and being content with its earthly lot of whatever 4 5
Ibid Ibid
The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, That she may be holy both in body and in spirit: But she that is married careth for the things of the world, How she may please her husband. And this I speak for your own profit; Not that I may cast a snare upon you, But for that which is comely, And that ye may attend upon the Lord without distraction. 1 Corinthians 7:32-35 For your Maker is your husband - the LORD Almighty is his name - the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; He is called the God of all the earth. Isaiah 54:5
SPIRITUAL LIFE AS A SINGLE During this honeymoon, what can you do to 6 Emphasis is mine
foster God’s plan and experience the contentment Paul speaks of in the process? 1. Know where you stand on the subject of singleness. 2. Become comfortable with your own company – not reclusive. 3. Learn a new reliance on the Holy Spirit. 4. Enjoy your time of freedom to fellowship with the Lord. Fall in love with Him all over again, relishing the lack of distraction, luxuriating in His presence. 5. Get serious about the Word, setting aside time to learn who you in Christ and what is rightfully yours in His plan. 6. Determine what He has equipped you for, taking ownership of what you have been given. 7. Step out and use your Gifts. 8. Refresh yourself in the Plan for your life as He is daily revealing it to you. 9. Take time to clarify your Purpose, your life Mission and to begin Visioning.7
IN THE MEANTIME…
3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9.
a degree. Make a reading list. Then join or start a book club. Get season tickets to … Start a small side business based on something you enjoy. Write some articles and submit them online. Start that book. Volunteer at church, or in the community, etc… STEP OUT! The people you encounter will be like-minded and you will form new friendships, virtually effortlessly.
Do not allow single, as defined by society, to become your identity, a brand. See it as a commentary on your personhood, your oneness in Christ. Be identified by the perfection of one, and by your unbreakable connection, your covenant, with the One who desires above all else to be in oneness with you, to supply your every need for love and companionship! Copyright ©2014 Karin Syren All rights reserved Material Compiled, Adapted & Reprinted with permission from Various previously copyright articles and programs
Do not hesitate at any time to refresh yourself with reminders of Who He Is. Consider a study of the names of God, the ways in which He has revealed Himself as a personal God throughout the Bible. *** Finally, begin to consciously build a fulfill- Click to order your soft cover or Kindle copy of The ing lifestyle, not in anticipation of what will be Bible Minute at Amazon.com someday, but in appreciation for what is today. 1. Take a class, or teach a class. 2. Pursue a certification or licensure, or get 7 For more on this important process, see Karin’s website at www.solushunz.com
*** Karin can be reached at Ksyren@solushunz.net. For more information about Solu’shunz Leadership Services, go to www.Solushunz.com.
Never Say Never Conquering the Storms of Life with Unshakable Faith and Perseverance by Jennifer Workman
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to grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. (GaHow do you usually respond to setbacks or what latians 6:9, NKJV).” You must constantly remind appears to be deterrents in your life? Are you yourselves that “I can do all things through Christ quick to be very negative and condescending? which strengthens me (Philippians 4:13, NKJV).” What is your response to life’s difficulties? Are you quick to recover when things in life don’t go I guess many would say that, ‘it is easier said than the way that you plan or are you quick to “throw done’. I would agree from a human standpoint in the towel” and say, “What’s the use?” I believe that that statement is true. Life can be very overthat in order for us to be all that God intends whelming and we can go through many things for us to be, it requires an unshakable resolve to in life that seem to shake us at the core of our press forward when it seems we have nothing being. Many times we question, “Why so much on which to stand. The Bible clearly tells us “not suffering and so much pain? If there i s a God,
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why did I lose my child, or why did my husband walk off and leave me after many years of unwavering faithfulness to him?” I can’t answer those questions, but what I know to be true from my own personal experiences is that God is sovereign and still is in control.
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though this is the case, I am thankful for God’s unfailing love and His standing by my side and when I feel overwhelmed with the perplexities of life. I can go to Him because He says, “I will never leave you nor forsake you (Hebrews 13:5, NKJV).” That scripture and many others have been a source of strength to me I remember a few different instances in in different seasons of my life. From challengmy life being in very distressing situations es such as divorce, financial strains, loss of whereby many times I felt alone. One par- loved ones and the like, I know God is present. ticular instance in my life was when a dear friend of mine was tragically killed in a car Similarly, as I know undoubtedly that God accident. That particular situation caught me is my “refuge and strength, a very presoff guard and I was left feeling confused and ent help in time of trouble (Psalms 46:1, perplexed. I asked God to give me strength NKJV), likewise, I know he is for you.” You to understand overall what had happened don’t have to go through life bearing burand the strength to move forward. Although dens that are too hard for you to bear. God he answered my prayer, it took a while for me sees us, knows us and loves us dearly. We to heal and move forward. Another instance, have a father that is concerned about us. was when I lost my home and found myself Nothing can bring true peace, happiness and homeless with nowhere to go. At that time, I contentment than what comes from God. I really felt abandoned and alone. As I slept in want to encourage all of you to stand firm. my car many nights, I cried and prayed to the Yes, I realize that we live in difficult times, Yes, Lord for help and the strength to endure the I realize that life can make you want to give “wilderness season” that I was in. Although up, but don’t, I didn’t. Feel what you feel beI didn’t want to be in that situation, God cause that is O.K. just don’t give up. Resolve used that situation to empower me spiritu- in yourself that things will get better no matally, emotionally and mentally. He gave me ter what. Speak it, for the Bible says that “life the resolve to persevere in spite of my cir- and death are in the power of the tongue cumstances and when he taught me what I (Proverbs 18:21, NKJV).” And, ‘Never say Nevneeded to be taught in that experience, He er’ because the Word of God states “As a man sent help so that I was able to move forward. thinks in his heart so is he (Proverbs 18:21, NKJV).” There were and still are many different transitions that I am facing at this point in time. Al-
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Say No and Organize Your Life by Tiffany Lynn Lepp, COC, CPO Let your yes mean yes, and your no mean no. Anything more than this comes from the evil one. (Matthew 5:37 CEB) While these are natural emotions for us to have as imperfect humans, the truth is that it Decluttering our homes is a two-step process: does us more harm than good to say yes for Get stuff out AND don’t let more stuff in. those reasons. Say no and organize your life.
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The same is true for our time.
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WHY IT’S UNHEALTHY TO SAY YES WHEN YOU MEAN NO
Do you want a shorter to-do list? Do you want more free time on your calendar? Do The trouble with saying yes when you mean no you want to feel excited about each day? is that: The best way to declutter your time is to get comfortable with the word no. • Your intentions are wrong. God doesn’t want us to say yes out of fear, shame, guilt 5 REASONS IT’S HARD FOR US TO SAY NO: or pride. He wants us to say yes out of love. “Each of you should give what you • We want people to like us. have decided in your heart to give, not • We don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. reluctantly or under compulsion, for God • We want to show others that we can do and loves a cheerful giver.” (2 Corinthians 9:7 NIV) have it all. • We want to avoid having tough God cares about our motives. It’s not enough conversations. • We don’t want to feel bad or guilty. to just go through the motions. He would
rather us do one good work for the right reason, then 100 good works for the wrong reasons. If you are going to say yes to a request, but then complain or be resentful, say no. Remember, “God loves a cheerful giver.” (2 Corinthians 9:7 NIV) • You are more concerned with making people happy than making God happy. You might be pleasing others by performing the actions, but disappointing God because you are doing it for the wrong reasons. “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” (Galatians 1:10 NIV)
Financial experts tell us to pay ourselves first and before we pay others. The same idea is true about our time. First thing in the morning Jesus took some time for himself and to be with God. As women, we need to remember that taking time for God and for ourselves is not optional, but necessary. • Jesus has perfect timing. In John, we learn about a man named Lazurus who was sick. Mary and Martha went to tell Jesus about Lazurus and Jesus said that he would help. But, Jesus waited two days before going to see Lazurus. (John 11) Sometimes, for one reason or another we may have to say no to someone or something, but that doesn’t mean that we can’t change our minds and say yes when the timing is right.
• Jesus said no. In Luke, we learn about a man who was covered with leprosy. Jesus HOW JESUS SAID NO healed this man and told him not to tell anyone. But still, “News of him spread I think there is a misconception that in order to even more and huge crowds gathered to be true followers of Christ we must always say listen and to be healed from their illnesses. yes. But, Jesus taught us otherwise. But Jesus would withdraw to deserted • Jesus took care of himself. In Mark, it says places for prayer.” (Luke 5:15-16 CEB)
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Fear and judgment from others can cause us to do many things we wouldn’t otherwise do. John the Baptist tells us that many people believed in Jesus, but they were afraid that the Pharisees would kick them out of the house of prayer if they admitted to it, so they didn’t. “For they loved the glory that comes from man more than the glory that comes from God.” (John 12:43 ESV)
that “Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed. Simon and his companions went to look for him, and when they found him, they exclaimed: ‘Everyone is looking for you!’” (Mark 1:35-37 NIV)
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Doesn’t it sometimes feel like your spouse, children, parents, friends, and coworkers are clamoring for your attention? But, if Jesus can walk away from a crowd of sick people can’t you walk away every now and again?
WORDING TO HELP YOU SAY NO. If saying no seems too blunt, try some of these alternatives: • No, thank you. • I appreciate the consideration, but will have to pass. • I am unable to assist you. • No, thank you, but I would be happy to pray that you find someone to help. • Thank you for the opportunity, but I cannot accept this responsibility. • This particular request is not in-line with my strengths. Would you like me to help you find someone who would be better for the job? (Note: only say this if you do have time to find someone else.)
party might respond with: I don’t need it done right now, how about next week? Can you help next month? Okay. Is there a better time that you might be able to help?
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If you really do want to say yes to something, but now is not the right time then by all means HOW NOT TO SAY NO express that, but if you don’t want to do it then There is a right and wrong way to say no. let your no be no. Here is how NOT to do it:
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• I appreciate the consideration, but will have to pass right now. • I am unable to assist you. I have a very full month. • Thank you for the opportunity, however, I cannot accept this responsibility at this time.
SELF-DISCOVERY QUESTIONS Is there anything you’ve said yes to that you’d like to go back and say no to? How will you stop yourself from saying yes, until you’ve had time to think it through?
What opportunities would you like to say yes Do you notice what was wrong with those too moving forward? responses? It leaves the no open-ended. You are implying that now is not the right time, but What no longer interests you and you’d like to it may be the right time in the future. The other say no to in the future?
A FINE LINE There is a fine line between yes and no. We should not say no so often that we miss out on Tiffany Lynn Lepp is the opportunity to be servants of Christ, but a Christian Organizer we should also not say yes so often that we Coach, Certified put ourselves in harm’s way because we are so Organizer Coach®, and overworked, overstressed, and burned out. Certified Professional Organizer®. She is the author of the “How to Say NO” eGuide. Tiffany Whenever in doubt, refer back to your intentions. coaches women on how to live a less cluttered If someone you love needs help, sometimes the and more Christ centered life. She does this best way to help them is to not help them, but through her one-on-one and group Simplification to let them experience personal and spiritual Coaching Programs. Visit her online at www. growth. If your intentions are always focused TiffanyLynnLepp.com on God and love then you can’t make a bad decision.
Previous Issues Available
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visit: www.inspiredwomenmagazine.com
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inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
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inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
nature, such as brushing your teeth, washing your face or fixing yourself something to eat. There are other things you do on a regular basis which have become habit, yet require a bit more preparation, such as going to Have you ever said this, “I don’t have TIME to church, remembering to acknowledge friends’ exercise”? Some of us have said that more than birthdays, and shopping for groceries. once! In reality, it’s not about having time to exercise (we all have the same 24 hours each Making fitness a part of your regular routine day); we need to make time to exercise if we can become a habit—especially if you combine want to be healthy. it with something you are already doing, such as prayer, reading the Bible, or worshiping the Think of some of the things you already Lord. make time to do each day. Some of these things have been part of your daily routine How Can You Combine Faith and Fitness? since childhood and have become second
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The Surgeon General recommends 30 minutes of exercise a day to remain healthy Here’s a quick example. Take a brisk walk for ten minutes praying for your family, our country’s leadership, the peace of Jerusalem, God’s will for your life, and however the Lord leads you. At the end of ten minutes, turn around and briskly walk home praising the Lord. There, you’ve just transformed your workout into worship! Tell me what part of your life the Lord does NOT want to make part of His life – and ADD life to that part. After all, He IS the Author of Life! I believe that Jesus wants to be Lord over ALL parts of your life – even exercise!
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The Surgeon General recommends 30 minutes of exercise a day to remain healthy – and more if you want to lose weight – so why not use that time to build your relationship with your Heavenly Father?
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your heart, “I praise and thank You, Lord!” There, you’ve done it! You have just transformed a workout into worship! Sure, it took less than a minute, but it’s a start. If you have more time, take a walk, get on the rebounder (mini-trampoline), or treadmill. Work out to an exercise DVD (such as PraiseMoves, where the Scripture and worship are already provided for you – just join in!). Ride your bicycle, jump rope, dance and praise the Lord – the choices are limited only by your imagination. Add prayer, singing praises, reciting Scripture, purposefully counting your blessings (“name them one-by-one!”) – anything that helps center your focus off the world and onto the Lord. He is worthy, able and faithful – and His Word will NOT return to Him void (empty or unfulfilled)!
The foundation scripture to our PraiseMoves Make the decision today that you will transform Fitness Ministry reminds me of the responsibility your workouts into worship! and opportunity we have to invite God to help us become what I call a “Fit Witness for Christ.” Check out Laurette’s new book First Corinthians 6:20 says, “You were bought & DVD set from Destiny Image with a price; therefore glorify God in your body Publishers: “40 Days to Fit & Fabulous with PraiseMoves.” and your spirit, which are God’s.”
Christian Fitness Expert and Certified Health Coach Laurette Willis is the Director of No matter what time of day you are reading PraiseMoves Fitness Ministry with DVDs, Training, this article, you can do something to move your and Classes by Certified PraiseMoves Instructors on six body and honor God at the same time. Even if it continents (http://PraiseMoves.com). Join the 40-Day is just to reach your arms up right now as high Fitness Challenge at http://40DayFitnessChallenge.com as you can, take a deep breath and say with all ©2014
What Can You Do TODAY?
Luke 1:45 God’s Word ® Translation
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“You are blessed for believing that the LORD would keep His promise to you.”
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Riva Tims
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A Woman of Faith and Perseverance
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he is beautiful, soft-spoken, gracious, and humble. But, her beauty is not only skin deep, Riva Tims, Pastor of Majestic Life in Orlando, Florida is a powerful, passionate and persevering woman whose desire is to fulfill not only her destiny, but also to help others walk into their own too. Pastor Riva’s smile and spirit radiate with sincerity and love when in the same room with her. As many know, Pastor Riva went through a very tough season the last few years. It will be three years this August, her former husband was found dead inside a New York City hotel room. Prior to that, she endured a very public and hurtful divorce after her husband admitted to an adulterous affair. In her book, When It All Falls Apart, Pastor Riva describes how she became “physically ill, emotionally drained, and spiritually depleted”. The life Pastor Riva knew was becoming unglued. And though she describes that there were very difficult moments to withstand, she persevered in her faith and has watched how God has re-built her life one step at a time. Today, Pastor Riva has weathered the storm and the peace of God has been her anchor. Together with her children, she is living the ‘majestic life’. Pastor Riva is a true leader, Pastor, and lover of God. Watching her live her life you know that she is a role model who walks her talk. Pastor Riva is an inspiration to all of us and recently, I had the absolute great pleasure of asking Pastor Riva some questions.
IWM: So what’s been happening in your very testimony. Transparency is freedom for me and others! busy life? IWM: You have shared the emotional roller RT: A lot has been happening. Our church coaster of your marriage with Dr. Zach. Was moved into our new facility this year. It’s a total your marriage always this way? Why do you miracle. We’ve got lots of projects to complete think it changed?
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as we prepare for our Grand Opening and 5th year Anniversary in October. RT: No my marriage was not always an emotional roller coaster. We were in our early 20’s when we IWM: One thing I know about you is that you got married. Had four children in first five years are very transparent. Why do you feel it’s of marriage and moved about ten times within 13 years. So it was a whirlwind. Things changed important? emotionally when our finances changed for the RT: Where the Spirit of The Lord is there is liberty. better. The ministry became the mistress and I I found when you are not transparent you stifle could feel a distancing between us. the Holy Spirit from moving in your life to help someone else. We overcome the enemy by IWM: How do feel today after everything you the blood of the lamb and the WORD of our have been through?
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RT: I feel humbled. As I look back over the journey a pastor should be a conduit of the supernatural of my life and see how far God has brought me, I through prayer, word and worship. can’t help but feel amazed at the goodness and faithfulness of God. IWM: An area many women struggle with
is single-hood. How do you deal with being IWM: What has been your greatest or toughest single or have you found Mr. Right? challenge that you’ve overcome?
RT: No, he hasn’t found me yet, but I know he’s RT: The toughest challenge was in the coming. Singlehood is lonely at times. I’ve been rebuilding process. I was literally stripped of able to deal with it because I’ve stayed busy on almost everything after my marriage failed. The this journey. I do desire to be married. rebuilding process was painful and exhausting. If it wasn’t for the grace of God I don’t think I IWM: What advice beyond the usual would you would be alive today. God recovered my joy, give to women in their 40’s, 50’s that are still home, ministry and love. God was with me every step of the way even though there were waiting to be married? times I couldn’t hear His voice. RT: Do something different or go somewhere different so you can meet new people. IWM: I have seen you start up Majestic Life and Sometimes women do not make themselves one of the areas I’ve admired about you is your available to be found.
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humility, love and just plain being “real” what has gone wrong in so many of the churches IWM: What’s next for Pastor Riva? today?
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RT: I’m working on my next book and releasing RT: Unfortunately many church’s today don’t my music CD Access Granted on my record realize their purpose. Some church’s think their label Zion Records. My television show Majestic goal is to acquire as many members as possible Moment with Pastor Riva is now airing. and to put their name in lights. Our assignment is to be servants and equip the church to do IWM: How are your children who are so grown the work of the ministry and to lift the name of doing? Jesus. When our focus is not on us but on God, the Lord can trust you with people and finances RT: They are doing great. I’m so proud of how to advance the Kingdom of God. resilient they are. I can hardly believe I have four teenagers.
IWM: In your opinion, what is the true role of a Pastor?
IWM: What does Pastor Riva do for herself to
RT: A Pastor is someone who serves God’s people with the Word of God and communicates unwind and disconnect from everyday life? the vision that God gave to the church. A pastor leads people to God not to themselves. The RT: I haven’t been too great with unwinding. pastor shepherds the church to make sure no That’s an area I need to do better. I will take wolves or false doctrine enters the house. Lastly, suggestions. Lol
IWM: What makes you happy? RT: Peace and no drama. I’m the happiest when my family is all together and the members at church are growing and maturing in the things of God. I can witness the change.
IWM: I know you are working on project that will honor the life of Dr. Zach Tims. Can you tell us about it? RT: Absolutely! April 2013 the Tims family announced the plans to establish the Dr. ZT Enrichment Center. We have a five-year goal to obtain property and staff. The center will be a facility that will be an oasis and treatment center for pastors and executives who may be burned out, depressed or struggling with addiction and/or infidelity. Professional help will also be available for their families.
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Adriana Zamot is editor and publisher of Inspired Women Magazine. IWM began as a two page newsletter when she wanted to share with a few friends some of the highlights of Christian conferences that she had attended. She enjoys writing and sharing of the Lord’s goodness and mercy. Her hope is that IWM will inspire, motivate, and encourage other women towards their divine excellence. Most people refer to her as “AZ.” She has a Master Degree in Human Resources Administration and Development. She attends Majestic Life Church in Apopka, FL. You may contact her publisher@inspiredwomenmagazine.com
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SPEAKER
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Deborah is an award-winning financial consultant and holds numerous professional designations in that arena. Her first book contribution, The Secret to Winning BIG: Top Strategies for Winning BIG in Life and Business, is a best-seller. She writes for numerous lifestyle magazines and blogs and has been featured in the Wall Street Journal, Boston Globe, Forbes, Chicago Tribune, The Charlotte Observer, Miami Herald, Dow Jones Market Watch, Morningstar, CNBC, NBC, CBS, FOX, ABC and other news outlets. Whether speaking at conferences, faith-based occasions, fundraising events, or corporate boardrooms, she encourages others to reach, stretch and grab the opportunities that lay in wait. email: deborah@deborahhightower.com facebook: DeborahHightowerInc twitter: @pennedbydeborah linkedin: deborahhightower
Popular Topics POISED, PREPARED and in Hot PURSUIT of Your PASSION Work/Life Balance: Finding Greater Fulfillment and Happiness Motivation: Find it, Pass it on‌ Expand Your Boundaries: Outreach The F’s of Life: Faith, Family, Friends, and Finances
For All Bookings: (478) 719-0881 or
www.deborahhightower.com
Wise Advice by Lanette Kissel
The evangelist, Paul, imparted his wise advice, words that can help us to find our way, to keep us from stumbling in our walk with Christ, to help us make the most of each day. We should not become a house divided, lest Satan attack us from behind. We must be careful not to quarrel among ourselves, but to be one in thought and mind.
Avoid idolatry and immorality. Whatever we do, do it for the Lord, and we’ll receive the gift of immortality.
And when we’re not so wrapped up in ourselves… When it’s love that dictates every step we take, If our goal is to imitate the life of Christ, then everything we do is done for His sake. Our Father will lead and guide our choices. And we’ll never need question our worth. Nothing can separate us from God’s love, no power in hell or here on this earth. For along with Christ, we are heirs with Him, of a miraculous eternal rebirth.
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Stand firm in our faith and never waiver.
We should lift each other to God in prayer, for the needs of every sister, every brother. And remember, our greatest gift is love. Above all else, we must love one another.
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PREFACE:
Where Have All the People Gone? Except from Book One, The Journey Series, A Child Shall Lead Them
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by Barb Wiles
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Emily Samuel hummed distractedly as she looked over her work schedule for the day. As usual, she found herself thinking of Pops, her father. After Clint had gone, getting ready for the day had been their special time together. Every day he had been with them had been a day filled with his teachings—important lessons on how to live, not only in this place and in this time, but also in the time to come. Pops never wavered in his beliefs. She, on the other hand, hadn’t been as sure. In hindsight, she wished she hadn’t been so hesitant to listen to him.
As much as she missed Pops, she missed her husband more. He’d been gone much longer—doing what needed to be done. Clint had been so certain of what he had to do. He was a man with a mission and he would not let anything get in the way of accomplishing it. Even though she hated that he was gone, she admired his courage and knew he was right. All that remained was to wait for him to come home. In the meantime, she had kept Pops’ teachings in place and even added some of her own. She took the precautions, planned each day, prepared the children as thoroughly as she could, and hoped it would be enough.
ily’s shocked face. “Emily Samuel, it is hereby ordered that….” She didn’t hear the rest. She was not ready for this. She needed more time with her children! Thoughts raced agonizingly through her head, but even then she knew the futility of her situation. It was her time to be taken, just like Pops, and nothing could change that. There was no escape. As she stood unmoving, he grabbed her arm tightly, his fingers sinking deep into her flesh. She winced. He smirked as he gripped her upper arm even more fiercely. It seemed like his fingers must be curled around the very bone in her arm. “We can’t have you running away now,
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Time to get going. She would kiss Adam, Kimmie, and Casey goodbye and head to Garden Seven. Emily took a deep breath and stood up. It would be daylight soon, and she didn’t have time to worry about something she couldn’t control anyway. As she rounded the corner into the living room she stopped, stunned. The front door was open! How could that be? Just then, a short, stout man waltzed in. It was clear he knew exactly what his purpose was and it amused him. “Nice of you to open the door for me, Emily.” He held a document but he didn’t look at it as he read. Instead, his eyes bore into Em-
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can we? You’ve evaded us much too long as it is.” His superior sneer oozed evil. She expected nothing less. “Emily.” Startled she searched for the source of the new, gentle voice. “I am here.” At that moment, time stopped. The most beautiful, serene, peaceful man she had ever seen had suddenly materialized in her living room! He was bathed in brilliant, dazzling light, his clothes the purest white. All around the shimmering light was darkness. Only the beautiful man glowed. She could see nothing but him. The excruciating pain in her arm was gone. The beautiful man spoke again. “Even when you resisted, you knew this day would come. You have prepared the best that you could in your own strength. Now, let me protect you, even as I protect the ones you love.” “I have to go?” “Yes.” “And the children, you will protect my children? “It is done as I have said.” Overcome, it was all she could do to nod. “Thank you. I…I…I’m so sorry! I should have…You are he, aren’t you? The one Pops spoke of?” “I am.” “What happens now? Will my children be taken too?” “Fear nothing.” The beautiful man, surrounded by his glorious light, drew closer to Emily, enveloped her in his brilliance. She glimmered too—reflected in his radiance.
“Remain in my light, even as you leave this place. I will never leave you. Believe in me.” “I will. I do believe in you.” In that moment time began again. Emily watched the beautiful man withdraw to the edge of the room. Looking down, she saw that the short man was indeed still there and still holding her arm, totally unaware of what had just happened. “What are you looking at?” he sneered. With one last look at the man of the light, she turned and allowed herself to be jerked through the door and out of the house. “You won’t find the kids, you know.” “We’ll see,” he said, with the faintest of smiles. “And you won’t win either.” “Well, now, we’ll just see about that too, won’t we?” Emily looked back toward her house, the house where her children slept unaware of what was about to happen. The man in the light said that he would protect them. It was more than enough. “Copyright 2014, Barbara Wiles. All rights reserved. Adapted from The Journey 1: A Child Shall Lead Them. After a successful career in the staffing and non-profit arenas, Barb is now the author of The Journey Series, an adventure trilogy for young people, and co-founder of Women Living Boldly. Look for “The Journey Series, Book 1: A Child Shall Lead Them” which will be published later this year. You can reach Barb at barb@ womenlivingboldly.com.”
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Fighting Your Way Out Of Emotional Unhealthiness by Ashley Marivittori Gorman Bright, amazed, soaring, beaming. Disappointed, sad, upset, angry. Sometimes as women, we feel like we are constantly caught in the whiplash between these two emotional extremes. Perhaps everything went well this month and you feel on top of the world. Perhaps you feel like God pulled the rug out from under you and you can’t understand why. The truth is, we as women feel a great deal of emotions on any given day. And most of the time, we don’t know what to do with those feelings.
the Scriptures experiences all sorts of emotions: love, determination, sadness, betrayal, excitement, tenderness, frustration, and joy. So being made emotional is a good thing when we realize that our purpose is to show off something that the world usually forgets: the God who feels. Feelings do great things for us, and they are hardwired in us by the Lord for a reason. He crafted them to help us navigate life. When something is wrong, we feel it. When we feel disturbed or hesitant in a situation, that’s a built-in signal from the Lord to perhaps change paths or stop, wait, and think. When we feel joy or excitement or giddiness, that’s also a built-in signal to celebrate a situation instead of walking right past it without much notice.
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There are two things that are true about you today that you can claim: one, you were made an emotional being by God on purpose, and that’s a beautiful thing. And two, you are not a slave to those emotions, and that’s a beautiful thing too. When you feel overwhelmed by your feelings, claim these two simple statements So we see that emotions were meant to be throughout your day. navigational guideposts, helping us respond Declaration 1: “I AM MADE AN EMOTIONAL accordingly to life. But we forget that they are BEING BY GOD ON PURPOSE, AND THAT’S A not laws to live by, that we are not to give them GOOD THING” full allegiance. This introduces our second point.
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God made males and females with different qualities on purpose. He wanted both sexes to embody various and different parts of His own character; that’s what it means to be made in His image, in His likeness. So when man and woman live harmoniously in this world, we represent a full picture of the character of God. As a woman, you get to reflect so many things about The Lord! For one, you get to represent the emotional side of God. The God we see in
Declaration 2: “HOWEVER, I’M NOT A SLAVE TO THOSE EMOTIONS RIGHT NOW. I CAN CHOOSE WHAT’S TRUE OVER HOW I FEEL.” Although emotions were hardwired in us for an amazing purpose, due to the nature of sin in all of us, we sometimes let those feelings have a heavier weight in our life than they ought. For example, we let disturbance and hesitancy morph into anxiety that lasts all week. Or we
let excitement and giddiness over a situation transform into fixation or obsession. Although the original intent of our emotions was to direct
“God has given you His Word as a weapon against unhealthy emotions, so fight Jesus-style!” us forward in a healthy way, a lot of the time, our emotions paralyze us instead. Sometimes we get so worked up about a situation in life that our rational side flies out the window! I know this due to the season my husband and I are in. We really need to buy a car since his car is on its last leg. I feel anxiety about this decision, as we want to make a wise, non-excessive choice with our money, but we also want to truly enjoy the car we choose. My emotions range from excitement to despair and back again so many times throughout the week. I go from “I’m so excited about this car I saw online, so let’s buy it NOW!!” to “We’re never going to afford what we really want; we might as well just stop looking altogether.” Have you ever been in a similar emotional situation?
So what’s the way out? How do we escape from feeling trapped inside a storm of feelings throughout the day? How do we reign in our
inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
The truth is, I shouldn’t make a huge financial decision when I feel overrun by my feelings. I shouldn’t just go buy any car I like online without vetting it first. But I also shouldn’t give up the search just because I feel disappointed sometimes. In this case, my feelings aren’t helping me navigate at all; they are taking over, sending me wrong signals, and overwhelming me. Before I let them help me make a decision, I need to get them in check.
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competing emotions and end up on the healthy those negative emotions get combated with truth. God has given you His Word as a weapon side of decision-making? against unhealthy emotions, so fight JesusWe simply tell ourselves this truth: “My feelings style! today do not have the last word today. God has What do I mean by Jesus-style? Can you the last word.” remember what Jesus did when He went And how does God get the last word? through that season of temptation from Satan in Matthew 4:1-11? With every lie, Jesus fought You listen to His words in Scripture more than you back with these three words: “It is written.” He listen to all the emotional voices wreaking havoc would quote verse after verse that put Satan in in your heart today. Think of it this way: your his place! Now, if Jesus Himself had to combat feelings fluctuate like water does when a storm lies with truth from Scripture, you better believe rolls in. Emotions send you swaying and they toss we need to do the same! you up and down, left and right. God’s Word is your anchor that keeps you steady amidst all the In conclusion, sister, I’d tell you to fight back! fluctuations of your heart. It keeps you grounded Your feelings are a gift, yes, but they don’t own and wise instead of spiraling and impulsive. you. You should give thought to your emotions, but ultimately, they shouldn’t master you. You So do this: locate the source of what’s really got should master them and put them in subjection you in a tizzy, and fight your feelings with what’s to what God says. You can choose your way out true about God and about you today. There of a funk by trusting what God says over all the is usually a big, fat lie undergirding our most emotional voices in your head. God has given emotional moments. The lie I believe most is you a powerful weapon with His Word, so use this: God isn’t going to pull through for us. What’s it! Let God define what’s true, not how you feel. your biggest lie? What gets you all out of whack? Don’t take the hits of overwhelming emotions Is it that God won’t provide? That He’s not really lying down. Don’t respond like God has given for you? That He isn’t with you during this hard you no resources to win. That’s not our God. season? That His way isn’t as good as yours? That He’s better than that. Sister, it involves a fight, He’s not really powerful? That He doesn’t care? but emotional victory is on the table for the taking. It’s up to you to use the resources He’s Once you find the lie that undergirds most of given you and grab hold of emotional health. your emotional distress, it’s easy to find Scripture So locate the lies, find the truths that combat to combat that lie. Find passages that really them, and remember that you belong to the speak to you, that really rev you up and infuse Lord, not your emotions! faith in your heart. Plaster them everywhere, so you’ll have something to tangibly look at Ashley Marivittori Gorman when your emotions start surging up within Blog: ashleymgorman.com you. Do you usually freak out in your car? Place Twitter: @ashmarvgorman a strategic verse on your dashboard. Do you Instagram: @ashmarvgorman get overwhelmed when you get ready in the Facebook: facebook.com/ morning? Do you struggle with image issues? Ashleymarv My book on dating: Write out a verse regarding beauty with a whiteTheBookofMatches.com board marker across the top of your mirror so
Anxiety a Weight too Heavy to Carry by Jennifer Workman “Why are you cast down, O my soul? And why are you disquieted within me.” (Psalms 42:5, NKJV)
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oes that sound familiar? If you’ve answered yes to this question, then you are definitely not alone because that has been the heartfelt cry of many people. A cry for help and relieve amidst the constant weights and pressures of life. Life is very difficult. We as human beings are inundated with various stressors on a daily basis from unexpected family issues, to unending financial strains, to marital issues, etc.
According to the Bible, there is nothing wrong with honestly facing and trying to deal with our problems of life. But it is wrong and unhealthy to be immobilized by excessive worry (Christian Counseling-A Comprehensive Guide by Gary Collins, pg. 79).” Having this in mind, we really need the help of the Lord to effectively and adequately deal with anxiety. As David states, “Search me, O God, know my heart; try me, and know my anxieties (Psalms 139:23).” Whatever plagues us and is at the center of an “anxious heart,” needs to be brought to God in prayer, and it is through prayer, that we connect with God and receive help from
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The pressures of trying to live up to a false picture of what the world views as “perfect” and one that is able to be “all things to all people” is a daunting feat indeed! We are in a constant state of arousal and it is “no wonder” why we deal with such a high level of anxiety. The body wasn’t created to be under a continual “adrenaline high.” You do a lot of “undoable” damage to your body because it isn’t equipped to “function effectively when it remains in a perpetual state of tension and arousal (“Christian Counseling-A Comprehensive Guide”By Gary Collins- Pg. 78).” One of the manifestations
of being under a constant state of arousal is Depression. The Bible tells us that “anxiety in the heart of a man causes depression (Proverbs 12:25, NKJV).” Also, there are many other mental, physical and emotional affects that anxiety causes on our overall well-being from heart disease, to panic attacks, to aches and pains, to headaches, to anger and “the list goes on and on.”
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The body wasn’t created to be under a continual “adrenaline high.”
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God to be able to successfully maneuver the people are able to receive his love without limitations, then, we know unequivocally complexities of life. that we can turn over all our cares and God is the source of all comfort and is concerns of life to “present” to ease him because he is our anxious hearts our Father and our (Psalms 46:1, NKJV) “refuge” (Psalms and (Psalms 94:19, 46:1). “When you NKJV). “He cares can’t count on no about us and he one or nothing else doesn’t want us to you can count on carry loads that are God!” impossible for us I implore you to carry but release today to relinquish those burdens on his whatever control strong and capable you may have over shoulders (I Peter your situation and 5:7) and (Hebrews place it in the 12:1, NKJV).” For God powerful hands of promises to always be with us through our trials and tribulations God almighty. We spear ourselves from (Hebrews 13:5, NKJV).” Thank God for his sickness, death and unnecessary pain, unwavering and indescribable love towards when we recognize “who can really handle our problems” and it definitely isn’t us all of mankind! but God! I know that this isn’t something An unwavering love so strong that he sent that some of you can do instantaneously his only begotten son Jesus to atone for the but honestly, “is anything else working? sins of all people (John 3:16, NKJV). “Having The Bible tells us emphatically for us to exemplified that, do you think that God cast all our cares upon Him for He cares would leave you in the predicament you’re for us (I Peter 5:7).” Try God because in the in, to crumble under all the negativity and long run, what do you have to lose other problems of life?” My answer to you is “no!” than “weight” that you were not meant to God loves you unconditionally and if we as carry!”
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inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
Living Longer, Living Smarter
A woman’s work is never done — which includes planning for her future. Let Decide.Create. Share. show you just how easy it is to take the first step.
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Spending Time with God: In His Presence Is Fullness of Joy
inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
by Natalie Hall
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During these stressful and turbulent times, to spend additional time with God, we may find it is easy to become depressed, discouraged, ourselves depleted of our joy and our strength. and disheartened. I have come to realize that According to Psalms 8:10, “…the joy of the Lord spending time with God and being in His is your strength.” Therefore, the joy that comes presence is a victorious way to defeat those from God, is the spiritual weapon we need to destructive and negative feelings. In God’s defeat negative emotions. It is your decision presence, there is the fullness of His joy, and His to put aside all electronics, and to shut out the joy gives us the spiritual strength we need to business of life so that you can set aside a time go through difficult and painful circumstances to spend precious moments with God. without feeling hopeless and ready to stop living according to the word of God. It is comforting to know that our joy is not Spending time with God is like exercising. After dependent on tangible objects such as houses, exercising for a few days, and experiencing cars, and clothes. These objects are perishable the benefits, you will start to look forward to and may bring only temporary happiness; but exercising daily, and if you skip a few days, you our joy comes from our relationship with God will feel like something is missing. Since in His and His Son Jesus Christ. After we accept Jesus presence there is joy, peace, and love, once you Christ as our personal savior, and after we receive start spending alone time with God, you will the gift of the Holy Spirit, The Holy Spirit will definitely desire to be in His presence each and bring us into God’s presence and in His presence every day, So, let’s get started. is complete and full joy. How wonderful that the joy we receive from God is not perishable, but
Guidelines for spending time with God:
Many times, we pray quick prayers and “make
in secret will reward you openly” (Matthew
our request known”, but the fact is if we neglect
6:6).
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eternal and gives us peace. God’s joy helps us RETREAT to go through any adverse and heartbreaking • Retreat to a private place where there situation because our hope is in Him. Psalm are no distractions. “But you, when you 16:11 proclaims,” You will show me the path of pray, go into your room, and when you have life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; At Your shut your door, pray to your Father who is in right hand are pleasures forevermore.” the secret place; and your Father who sees
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• After you have made your request known, PRAISE choose to spend additional time with God. • Begin to thank the Lord and give him the You may also choose to select a separate highest praise. “Praise the Lord! Oh, give time to just be alone with Him and be in His thanks to the Lord, for He is good! For His presence. mercy endures forever” (Psalm 106:1) • You may want to listen to worship music, sing spiritual songs, meditate on God’s word, or be inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
still and experience the sweet peace of silence.
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You are preparing to go into His presence.
REST • Rest in the Lord and focus on Him and not on anything else. He is waiting with open arms. “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” Matthew 11:28).
• Keep praising Him and you will begin to feel a quietness and calmness in your spirit, your mind, and your body.
WORSHIP • Worship Him, tell him how much you love Him and how wonderful He is to you. Bless the Lord, O my soul; And all that is within me, bless His holy name!” (Psalm 103:1)
FELLOWSHIP • He will fellowship and communicate with you and you will feel such love and tenderness in His presence. He will encourage, enlighten, guide, counsel, and strengthen, you. He will have whatever you need. “You will show me the path of life: in your presence is fullness of joy; at your right hand there are pleasures forevermore.” (Psalm 16:1)
ENJOY • Enjoy being in His presence. When you are in His presence, is just you and God and complete and total joy. “Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice!” (Philippians 4:4). Finally, as you begin to spend more time with God, you will develop your personal way for entering into His presence. This fellowship can
in·spire (n-spr)
take place anytime. All it takes is finding time to be alone with Him; just the Lord and you fellowshipping and communing together. Being in His presence is what will help you during those times you feel like you cannot make it, or difficult hardships. So, let us eagerly develop a lifestyle of spending alone time with God. “Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” (Romans 15:13).
~To fill with enlivening or exalting emotion: ~ To stimulate to action; motivate ~ To affect or touch ~ To breathe on. ~ To breathe life into
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during those times you face unfavorable and
v. in·spired, in·spir·ing, in·spires ~ To affect, guide, or arouse by divine influence.
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The Emotional Side of Beauty by Mia Green
As women we have been designed to be nurturers. It’s how we are made and it’s what we naturally do. For many of us we are the strength in our families, the glue that holds everything together, and if we breakdown and lose it then our entire family (we feel) will completely fall apart. Because of this, we spend time taking care of others while we neglect ourselves and fail to deal with the areas in our lives that cause us to be emotional wrecks. When this happens we sometimes have a tendency to use fashion and cosmetics to “mask” what’s going on within us and that should never be the case. Cosmetics should enhance and uplift. I always say, “You look the way you feel and you feel the way you look.” So in the midst of dealing with the area(s) in your life that cause you discomfort, yet find you’re in a season of “taking care of you,” then try these three beauty staples to enhance your glow:
Mascara Bronzer Lip Gloss inspired women magazine MAY / JUNE 2014
Apply mascara to your upper and lower lashes to open up the eyes and make them look vibrant and full of life.
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Dust bronzer across your Brush on a little (or A LOT) of cheeks and around your face your favorite lip gloss to add a to create the illusion of a warm touch of color to your face. sun-kissed glow.
Life happens to all of us, but when it does, remember to use your cosmetics to uplift how you’re feeling---not to mask it. Mia Green is a professional makeup artist, and the owner of Les Fleur Cosmetics a makeup studio that specializes in ethnic skin and custom blended cosmetics. For more info you can visit www.lesfleurcosmetics.com
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