HE SAID, SHE SAID We

8M I N I 0 f a l l ‘21

HE SAID, SHE Said

Undoubtedly one of the most creative couples ever to grace the internet with their presence, JEFF and KELLY MINDELL (Studio DIY) have put their heads together on numerous projects, from Pinterest-perfect Halloween costumes to their own colorful home renovation. We were delighted to chat with the content-creating duo (and parents to son, Arlo) about raising their toddler in Los Angeles and here’s what they had to say.

KELLY ON THE CLOCK

IF I HAD MORE TIME

“I would take a dance class!”

KIDS MOVIE “Up.”

NOW PLAYING “Show tunes!”

GROWING UP, I WANTED TO BE

“A cat house designer.”

I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD

“Say things like, ‘Please take your mouth off the wall.’”

FAVE LA KIDS SPOT “Merci Milo, the most magical toy store in Highland Park!”

MINI | What do you love most about motherhood?

KELLY MINDELL | I love that I have the opportunity to watch this little human discover and understand the world. I love watching his brain work as he masters a new skill or discover something he’s never seen before. I love seeing what he loves, and what he dislikes, and watching his personality blossom daily. It is so magical to watch a child exploring life and become the person they’re meant to be.

MINI | What do you think is the greatest challenge of motherhood?

KELLY MINDELL | The amount of information and opinions you’re hit with as a mother is overwhelming. Weeding through that to find what works for you and your family, and leaving the rest behind without guilt or judgement, is a journey I’m still working on.

MINI | What has surprised you most about parenting?

KELLY MINDELL | I grew up with four older brothers. I knew what a chaotic big family life was like, but I still somehow had no idea one toddler could have so much energy.

MINI | What is your greatest parenting worry or fear?

KELLY MINDELL | Getting caught up in the chaos of everyday life and missing the moments that matter most.

MINI | On the flip side, what is your greatest joy of parenting? KELLY MINDELL | Holidays as a mom are some of my greatest joys. I love being able to pass down family traditions, and start new ones of our own. I love the crafts, the baking, collecting books to read each season, and spending intentional time with family creating memories.

MINI | What makes Jeff a great dad?

KELLY MINDELL | Jeff loves to explore and try new things, and his excitement for life is infectious. I love that he teaches our son the importance of always remaining curious, and the new things you can discover, even close to home, if you look closely enough.

MINI | What traits do you hope your kids pick up from Jeff?

KELLY MINDELL | His curiosity, his loyalty, his boldness and the importance he places on the ones he loves.

MINI | What makes you two a great team?

KELLY MINDELL | I’m a homebody who likes hands-on projects and a plan. Jeff is spontaneous and loves being out and about exploring. We complement each other nicely by giving our son a bit of both!

MINI | If you could give your kids one piece of advice, what would it be?

KELLY MINDELL | Fight for what you believe in and don’t be afraid to go after what you want. I’m certain I will regret this as a teen parent, but more certain it’ll serve him well in the long run.

MINI | What do you love most about fatherhood?

JEFF MINDELL | The conversations I have with my son. Sometimes, I will just sit and let him go on and on about whatever is on his mind. It’s my favorite thing ever.

MINI | What do you think is the greatest challenge of parenting?

JEFF MINDELL | That as soon as you feel like you’ve mastered something, life slaps you across the face and says “JUST KIDDING!” and all of a sudden they aren’t sleeping through the night and now vehemently hate avocado.

MINI | What surprised you most about parenting?

JEFF MINDELL | How little patience I have. I really always thought of myself as a patient person. I was wrong. Working on it.

MINI | What is your greatest parenting worry or fear?

JEFF MINDELL | That I’m somehow going to screw him up. It’s (mostly) irrational, but he’s such a sponge at this age and there are certain choice words he might or might not hear at home that keep getting repeated and I’m honestly just waiting for the note from school.

MINI | On the flip side, what is your greatest joy of parenting? JEFF MINDELL | Seeing the world through his eyes. The unapologetic curiosity is just incredible to walk him through.

MINI | What makes Kelly a great mom?

JEFF MINDELL | Her dedication to instilling a sense of wonder and creativity into every single day. She can make breakfast a magical dance party and I’ve never seen a human being construct an entire (functioning) ferris wheel out of popsicle sticks before 8 am. It’s exhausting and I love her for it.

MINI | What traits do you hope your kids pick up from Kelly?

JEFF MINDELL | A love of creativity and imagination along with an affinity for song and dance.

MINI | What makes you two a great team?

JEFF MINDELL | We can navigate an all-day marathon of activities for our son like nobody’s business. I handle the outdoor activities (hiking, running around the park, bike rides) and by the time we get home, Kelly will have a baking project in the kitchen followed immediately by a craft in the backyard. The goal is to completely tire him out by end of day. We have literally never succeeded.

MINI | If you could give your kids one piece of advice, what would it be?

JEFF MINDELL | Being unique is so much better than being the same.

JEFF ON THE CLOCK

IF I HAD MORE TIME

“I would socialize with friends I can’t ever see because of crazy schedules.”

GROWING UP, I WANTED TO BE

“A contestant on Double Dare.”

I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD

KIDS MOVIE “The Sandlot.”

NOW PLAYING “The Weeknd.” “Want to be home more than wanting to be out.”

FAVE LA KIDS SPOT “Beaches in Malibu, Griffith hiking trails, or any of the city parks!”

SLEEP SAGA

One of the most important facets of parenthood (for both babies and adults alike!) is also one that’s met with the most confusion. Enter sleep experts STEFFI EDWIN and LAUREN WOLF, both on the Sleep Team at Coterie, the authority on innovative and sustainable diaper design, to answer parents’ most pressing questions.

8M I N I 6 f a l l ‘21

WHEN IS THE BEST TIME TO TRY TO START BABY ON A SLEEP SCHEDULE?

LAUREN WOLF | Around four to six weeks many babies start to show their first signs of sleep maturity. This can mean a longer stretch of night sleep, or just sleeping in a more consolidated way at night (i.e. eating and returning to sleep with less disruption). I encourage an eat, awake, sleep routine starting around six to eight weeks. This means offering baby feedings upon waking from naps, then having some awake time, then back to sleep. This cycle can promote baby learning to put themselves to sleep without a feeding. Between four to five months when baby’s daytime circadian rhythm is more developed, I recommend moving to a three nap schedule with an earlier bedtime.

HOW CAN YOU TELL IF BABY IS GETTING ENOUGH SLEEP?

LAUREN WOLF | The AAP has guidelines for sleep needs by age. That being said, the ranges are very wide. It’s always helpful to check in with a sleep consultant on this. We work with so many babies and are very knowledgeable on the averages for daytime and nighttime sleep. It’s also important to pay attention to your baby’s demeanor. Are they cranky, rubbing eyes, or fussy a lot of the time? If so, then they might need more sleep. Are they waking up happy and refreshed or crying? Sometimes waking up grumpy means they didn’t sleep long enough.

STEFFI EDWIN | A baby who is well rested is less fussy, has optimal growth and development, is happy and pleasant all the time.

WHAT ELEMENTS ARE CONDUCIVE TO GETTING BABY TO SLEEP THROUGH THE NIGHT?

LAUREN WOLF | There are many factors to this and it’s important to know that every baby sleeps through the night at different ages. That being

said, one thing to consider is the baby’s weight. Not only how much they weigh but also are they consistently gaining weight and staying on their curve. Those are objective measures many pediatricians take into account. Having a strong bedtime routine and age appropriate schedule can help a baby sleep through the night. If a baby goes down overtired, then their bodies produce excess cortisol which leads to struggles falling asleep and staying asleep. It can also cause early wakings. Sleep environment is also very important. We are looking for cool, dark (think cave-like) and quiet. Ideal temperature is 68-72 degrees. A white noise machine or fan can aid in sleep as well. Lastly, if a baby can fall asleep without parental intervention at bedtime, they’re more likely to sleep longer stretches, or through the night depending on their age.

WHAT TIPS OR TOOLS CAN PARENTS TRY IF BABY IS HAVING A HARD TIME SLEEPING?

LAUREN WOLF | The four pieces of the baby sleep puzzle include sleep environment, routine, schedule, and independent sleep. All are important ingredients. A sleep consultant can walk you through some quick and easy fixes to promote better quality sleep. For starters, try black out shades in your baby’s room, a white noise machine, and a short bedtime routine. If you’re doing all of that, then consider how your baby is falling asleep. If

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they are relying on feeding or rocking for example, you may want to work to slowly remove that association so the baby can work towards independent sleep. There are a few ways to achieve this goal. Some methods are more direct, some more gradual.

STEFFI EDWIN | I like to recommend that parents start with following age appropriate wake windows and implementing a consistent bedtime routine, then remove any dependent sleep associations (i.e rocking/bouncing nursing to sleep), and place their child down awake. They may use a sleep training method that aligns with the parenting style to teach their child to fall asleep independently. A child who falls asleep independently is able to put themselves back to sleep independently when they wake up through the night.

WHAT ARE SOME OF THE MOST COMMON MISCONCEPTIONS ABOUT BABY’S SLEEP OR “SLEEP TRAINING?”

STEFFI EDWIN | Some of the most comon are sleep training means leaving your baby to “Cry It Out.” The CIO or Extintion Method is only one method of teaching a child to fall asleep independently. There are many other sleep training methods that do not require a parent to leave their child to Cry It Out. [Another is that] sleep training will affect a baby psychologically. Research shows that implementing sleep intervention in

children leads to healthy gains for infants and also maternal mental health.

LAUREN WOLF | So many! For starters, every baby is different. I think the internet, social media, and books in general have pressured parents to think their baby should be sleeping 12 hours by 12 weeks and if they’re not, then you’re failing. This is just not true. Many babies don’t sleep through the night until 6+ months. Baby sleep is constantly evolving in the first 3 years. Sometimes hiccups happen. Often they are tied to developmental milestones (crawling, walking, talking) but other times for no apparent reason other than your child is still learning how to sleep and that’s ok. Another misconception is that all sleep training is “Cry It Out.” This is of course one method that many parents use and is perfectly acceptable, however there are a few other methods that offer higher parental involvement such as checking in on your child to soothe them or staying in your child’s room the entire time. Sleep training does not have to mean you close the door and don’t go back in until morning. You can also keep night feeds and sleep train. With baby sleep, everything is normal. Babies wake early, take short naps, and fight sleep. That is normal. I really try to coach parents on this topic. Are there often things we can work on to improve those pain points? Yes, of course. But knowing that most babies go through the same setbacks is comforting and not talked about enough.