Vol. 30, No. 2, January 25 - February 7, 2008

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TALKING TRASH Eclectic Junkyard Gamelan Go Dumpster Diving to Make Beautiful Music

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LOCAL NEWS BRIEFS Majority of Marylanders Support Same-Sex Unions; Sen. Britt, Sponsor of Marriage Bills, Dies; Fake Fliers Call Gilchrest Friend of Gays. By Scott Baum

NATIONAL NEWS BRIEFS Log Cabin Denounces Huckabee; Gay Men Likely Spreading 'Superbug' Staph Infection; Midler and Manilow Were Thrilled to Sing in Bathhouses; Log Cabin Lashes Out at Bill Clinton; Do Tell, Don't Go; Dykes on Bikes Wins Trademark Case; Sen. Craig Expands Legal Strategy; Trans Official Returns HRC Award. By Rex Wockner

INTERNATIONAL NEWS BRIEFS Protester Found Guilty in Riga Pride Attack; Scotland to Pass LGBT Hate-Crime Law; Homosexual Convictions of Six Moroccans Upheld; Wrongly Arrested BBC Host Awarded Damages; ILGA to Meet in Quebec City; Gay Nursing Home Opens in Berlin; South African AIDS Leader Marries; Brazilian Gay Activist Murdered; Dutch Artist Receives Death Threats Over Gay Muslim Photos; Straight Bouncer Called 'Breeder' Wins Discrimination Case; Traveling Government Exhibit Celebrates Czech Gay History; Gay Canadian Organ Donors To Face Extra Scrutiny; Moscow Polling-Place Protesters Acquitted. By Rex Wockner FEATURE Trash Talk: Terry Dame's Electric Junkyard Gamelan Brings Inventive Polyrhythms to Baltimore.

By Rahne Alexander OPINIONS Bisexual, Stage Right. By Leslie Robinson The Beginning. By Robert Maril Someone Like Me? By Gwendolyn Ann Smith Farewell. By Scott Baum Heath Ledger: More Than That “Gay Cowboy.” By Miles Christian Daniels

PENCIL ME IN Theater: Cirque Dreams Jungle Fantasy at the Hippodrome, and Mrs. Warren’s Profession at RepStage Calendar. By Scott Baum MOVIES Cassandra's Dream, Cloverfield, First Sunday, The Kite Runner, Mad Money, and 27 Dresses HEALTH Caregivers, Take Care. By David Haltiwanger, Ph.D. HEALTH Family-Building Options. By Hilary Neiman

Q SCOPES Curb Your Enthusiasm, Aries! By Jack Fertig Q PUZZLE Re-tractions

BSCENE Pictures from around town. By Jay W Photos QUOTE UNQUOTE By Rex Wockner

Gay Life is a publication of the Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Baltimore. Gay Life is published every other Friday in Baltimore, Maryland, with distribution throughout the Mid-Atlantic region. Copyrighted 2008. All Rights Reserved. Gay Life is copyrighted and may not be reproduced without the expressed written consent of the publisher. Opinions expressed are those of the writers and do not necessarily reflect those of Gay Life or its publisher.

Brian Flottemesch President of GLCCB

241 W. Chase Street Baltimore, MD 21202 Phone: 410.837.7748 Fax: 410.837.8889 Email: editor@baltimoregaylife.com

Scott Baum Editor

editor@baltimoregaylife.com

Ron Crognale Art Director

Maddy Dwertman Sales

sales@baltimoregaylife.com

National Advertising Rep. Rivendell Media 212-242-6863

CONTRIBUTORS Rahne Alexander Miles Christian Daniels Jack Fertig David Haltiwanger Robert Maril Leslie Robinson Gwendolyn Ann Smith Rex Wockner

art@baltimoregaylife.com

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LOCAL NEWS

Compiled by Scott Baum

Majority in Maryland Support Same-Sex Unions Civil Unions Favored Over Marriage

A new poll conducted by the Baltimore Sun shows that the majority of Marylanders – nearly three out of five – favor either marriage or civil union rights for same-sex couples. Both of those issues – along with a constitutional amendment to ban same-sex completely – are being taken up this legislative session in Annapolis.

Of the registered voters polled, 19 percent said they support same-sex marriage and 39 percent support civil unions. Another 31 percent said they disagree with granting either marriage or civil union rights to LGBT Marylanders. The other 11 percent of those polled said they were unsure or declined to answer the question.

Of those Marylanders who would deny same-sex couples any type of access to marriage or civil unions, only half believe the state’s constitution needs to be amended.

"This is a state that is much more open-minded to a legal arrangement between two people of the same sex, whether they call it marriage or civil unions," Steve Raabe, president of OpinionWorks, told The Sun. "It's not a state characterized by a large evangelical constituency but rather a more liberal electorate."

OpinionWorks, an Annapolisbased polling firm, conducted the survey for The Sun. The difference in public opinion is being played out in the halls of the statehouse this year. Gov. Martin O'Malley has said he prefers civil unions, while gay-rights activists such as Equality Maryland are pushing for a marriage bill with a provision that makes it clear that no religious institutions or clergy would be compelled to perform or

recognize same-sex marriages.

House Speaker Michael E. Busch has endorsed civil unions, and Senate President Thomas V. Mike Miller opposes both civil unions and same-sex marriage.

On the other hand, some Republican lawmakers are again advocating a constitutional.

The poll of Marylanders from across the state shows that the strongest support for same-sex marriage is in Baltimore City and the Washington suburbs. Support is highest among people younger than 35 and among whites. Respondents who identified themselves as Jewish were more like to support same-sex marriage or civil unions (70 percent), which evangelical Christians are more opposed (45 person said the state should not recognize samesex relationships).

Only about one in six, want to change the state constitution to completely ban same-sex marriage, but according to Raabe, that number could increase significantly with a high-profile campaign similar to those launched in other states.

Only Massachusetts allows same-sex marriage. Civil unions or domestic partnerships are offered in nine other states, including Connecticut, New Jersey, New Hampshire and Vermont.

"Where we end up in this larger debate remains to be seen, but if we don't ask right off for what we want then we're never going to get it," Del. Heather R. Mizeur, a Montgomery County Democrat, explaining to The Sun why she and others are seeking same-sex marriage and not a separate legal institution such as civil unions.

IN MEMORIAM

Eric McGary, AKA Erica Meadows Eric McGary, an entertainer who performed as Erica Meadows, passed away on January 22. He was 40 years old.

Erics Meadows was the producer of “Night of the G.O.D.S.” (Good Old Drag Show) the fourth Friday of every month at Club Hippo.

He grew up in Cohoes, N.Y., and moved to Baltimore after high school.

He started doing female impersonation and acting in 1992. Since coming to Baltimore he held several titles in Maryland, Washington, and Delaware, including Miss Hippo 1992, Miss Charm City 1993, Miss Glamour Girl 1994, Miss Stonewall Pride DC 1995, Queen of Pride Baltimore 1996, Miss Allegro 1996, Miss Gay MD (1st runner up) 1996, Miss Drag-a-thon MD 1996, Miss Sweetheart DE 1996, and Miss Northeast MD 2001.

Sen. Britt, Sponsor of Marriage Bills, Dies Sen. Gwendolyn T. Britt died unexpectedly of a heart attack on Saturday, January 12, at Doctor's Community Hospital in Lanham.

The 66-year-old Democrat from Prince George’s County was the lead sponsor of The Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Protection Act, which would legalize same-sex marriage.

"She taught us to keep the faith,

never to waiver from our commitment to a cause and to speak truth to power, no matter what obstacles stand in our way," Dan Furmansky, executive director of Equality Maryland, told the Washington Post.

This was the start of Britt’s fifth year in the Senate. She was a mother of two and grandmother of five who lived in Hyattsville and reprecontinued on page 4

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sented Landover Hills, Langley Park and Adelphi.

In a letter to Equality Maryland constituents, Furmansky called Britt a hero. “When Equality Maryland approached Sen. Britt about being a lead sponsor on The Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Protection Act, she did not hesitate or ask to think it over first. Her answer was definite, her pride apparent, her convictions solid.”

Last September, within hours of the state’s Court of Appeals handing down its decision to uphold the state’s ban on marriage for same-sex couples, Britt signed as a lead sponsor of the legislation.

Up until the time of her death, Britt prepared to file marriage equality legislation and continued to advocate other senators on the issue. “She made us at Equality Maryland feel that with her by our side, anything is possible,” Furmansky wrote. “She taught us to keep the faith, never to waver from our commitment to a cause, and to speak truth to power no matter what obstacles stand in our way."

"The whole Senate is devastated," Senate President Thomas V. Mike Miller Jr. (D-Calvert), told the Post. "We've been proud of her, enjoyed working with her and will

Sen. Gwendolyn T. Britt (D), the lead sponsor of The Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Protection Act, died unexpectedly of a heart attack on Saturday, January 12. miss her greatly."

"Senator Gwendolyn Britt was smart, hard-working, dedicated and honest. She was a true public servant," Gov. Martin O'Malley (D) said in a statement. "The Maryland State Senate and the entire General Assembly will not be the same without her."

“At a time in our nation's history where LGBT people seek champions for the equal protection of our families, Sen. Britt rose up and declared our cause her own,” Furmansky said.

Fake Fliers Call Gilchrest Friend of Gays

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Pink political fliers in Maryland’s 1st Congressional District say that Rep. Wayne Gilchrest has been a friend to the LGBT community, according to The Baltimore Sun. "That took courage, conviction and ... family Loyalty," the flier says.

"Wayne's Brother David married his 16-year partner at a service on the beach in Massachusetts."

The fliers were supposedly paid for by a group call Progressive Marylanders for Social Justice.

While Gilchrest does have a gay brother who married his partner in Massachusetts, the supposed sponsor of the flier, Progressive Marylanders for Social Justice, is a fictitious organization. The flier, according to the Gilchrest campaign, is a dirty political trick staged by one of his Republican rivals, state Sen. Andy Harris.

Harris, a state senator from Baltimore County, is trying to unseat Gilchrest who is seeking a tenth term in the U.S. House of Representatives, representing the 1st Congressional District, which encompasses all nine counties of the Eastern Shore along with substantial portions of Harford and Baltimore

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Rep. Wayne Gilchrest (R), who is seeking reelection to his 10th term in office, is the victim of a fake pro-gay flier produced by a fake pro-gay organization.

Counties, and a small part of Anne Arundel County.

In 2006, the Human Rights Campaign gave Gilchrest a score of 67 out of a possible 100. The state’s other Republican representative, Roscoe Bartlett, scored a zero. Gilchrest scored higher than Maryland Democrat Dutch Ruppersberger that same year.

Equality Maryland, the state’s

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NATIONAL NEWS

The Log Cabin Republicans have denounced Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee. "Gov. Mike Huckabee is establishing an unfortunate pattern on the campaign trail – making statements about gays and lesbians that demonstrate he's out of touch with the vast majority of Americans," said LCR President Patrick Sammon. (Photo: Huckabee Campaign)

Log Cabin Denounces Huckabee

The national gay group Log Cabin Republicans denounced Republican presidential candidate Mike Huckabee as an anti-gay extremist on Jan. 18.

"Gov. Mike Huckabee is establishing an unfortunate pattern on the campaign trail – making statements about gays and lesbians that demonstrate he's out of touch with the vast majority of Americans," said LCR President Patrick Sammon.

"Voters should take a close look at the governor's pattern of illinformed and extreme statements," Sammon said. "Gov. Huckabee should remember it's 2008, not 1968, and he's running for president, not preacher."

In his latest anti-gay remarks, Huckabee told Beliefnet.com on Jan. 17: "I don't think that's a radical view to say we're going to affirm marriage. I think the radical view is to say that we're going to change the definition of marriage so that it can mean two men, two women, a man and three women, a man and a child, a man and animal. Again, once we change the definition, the door is open to change it again. I

compiled by Rex Wockner with Bill Kelley

think the radical position is to make a change in what's been historic."

Sammon responded, "People of good conscience can disagree about marriage equality, but Americans deserve an honest discussion rather than false hysteria about bestiality, pedophilia and polygamy."

Huckabee also recently said he favors writing God's laws into the Constitution to save marriage from the gays.

"I believe it's a lot easier to change the Constitution than it would be to change the word of the living God, and that's what we need to do is to amend the Constitution so it's in God's standards rather than try to change God's standards."

Huckabee's longstanding hostility to gay people came into national focus in December, when the Associated Press published excerpts from a 1992 interview in which he made these statements: "I feel homosexuality is an aberrant, unnatural and sinful lifestyle, and we now know it can pose a dangerous public health risk."

"It is difficult to understand the public policy towards AIDS. It is the first time in the history of civilization in which the carriers of a genuine plague have not been isolated from the general population."

"In light of the extraordinary funds already being given for AIDS research, it does not seem that additional federal spending can be justified. An alternative would be to request that multimillionaire celebrities, such as Elizabeth Taylor, Madonna and others who are pushing for more AIDS funding be encouraged to give out of their own personal treasuries increased amounts for AIDS research."

Gay Men Likely Spreading 'Superbug' Staph Infection

A "superbug" staph infection that can cause nasty boils or worse on the genitals, buttocks and elsewhere is spreading among gay men in San Francisco, Boston and other cities.

The "pUSA03-positive USA300" strain of methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus is resistant to numerous types of antibiotics but still can be treated with surgical drainage, the oral antibiotic Bactrim and intravenous drugs.

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The findings were reported by the Annals of Internal Medicine on Jan. 14.

Gay men in San Francisco are 13 times more likely to catch the superbug, and one in every 588 people living in the Castro district already has it.

Washing with soap after possible exposure is the best way to protect oneself from the bacteria, which sometimes manifest as the "flesheating" variety.

It is likely the microbe is being transmitted during sex, the research suggested.

Midler and Manilow Were Thrilled to Sing in Bathhouses

Bette Midler and Barry Manilow were "just thrilled" to have gigs performing at gay bathhouses in the 1970s, Midler said Jan. 10 in an interview with TheStripPodcast.com.

"We were both so happy to have a gig that, you know, we didn't care because it was, you know, the guy was really nice to us and he was paying us what was really good money in those days, which was like $300 a night. I mean, that was an extraordinary amount of money in those days and we were just, like, we didn't care. We would have, you know, been at the zoo singing, we didn't care. We were just thrilled."

Midler said she was not taken aback by whatever else was going on at the baths.

"I know people expect me to have been, you know, appalled and stunned and all that stuff. I mean, maybe they're surprised that I was so blasé," she said. "I had seen plenty by that time, so, I have to say, it was not a big surprise.

"I had a great time. They were great to me and I had a chance to learn all these songs and play all these songs and move into the mainstream, and it was just like a dream come true."

Log Cabin Lashes Out at Bill Clinton

The national gay group Log Cabin Republicans sharply criticized former President Bill Clinton on Jan. 18 for allegedly rewriting the history of his "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" policy on gays in the military.

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"President Clinton should be embarrassed," said Log Cabin President Patrick Sammon. "He needs to take responsibility for the legislation he signed, instead of trying to blame others."

Campaigning for his wife Hillary on Jan. 18, Clinton said: "'Don't Ask, Don't Tell,' as articulated, as I worked it out with Colin Powell, who was then the chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, meant literally that – that people would be free to live their lives. As long as they didn't go march in gay rights parades or go to gay bars in uniform – in uniform – and talk about it on duty, they would be all right. Now, as soon as he [Powell] left, the anti-gay forces then in the military started using it as an excuse to kick people out."

But LCR's Sammon isn't having it.

"President Clinton either didn't understand the legislation he signed or he's lying," Sammon said. "From the very beginning of 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell,' there was no doubt what the law meant: gay and lesbian Americans could only serve if they lied about their sexual orientation or kept it a secret.

"This is another example of the Clintonian excuses and rewriting history that we've come to expect from this president – a man who gladly took support and money from gays and lesbians and then delivered 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' and the so-called 'Defense of Marriage Act.'"

Do Tell, Don't Go

U.S. Army Sgt. Darren Manzella came out on the CBS-TV program 60 Minutes last month, complete with a video of himself and a former boyfriend kissing.

Manzella figured that'd get him kicked out of the military under the Don't Ask, Don't Tell policy, which says members of the armed forces can be gay only if they keep it a secret.

But nothing has happened to Manzella. At all.

"I thought I would at least be asked about the segment or approached and told I shouldn't speak to the media again," he told USA Today on Jan. 8.

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real LGBT civil rights group, accused Harris of a similar ploy in November 2006, when he when ran against Democratic challenger Pat Foerster. During that election, constituents in the conservative district received middle-of-the-night robo calls from the nonexistent "Gay and Lesbian Push," urging them to support Foerster. Equality Maryland complained at the time.

Harris’ campaign denies any involvement in either case.

In a fundraising letter sent out by

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Harris last fall, he said he wanted to unseat Gilchrest because the congressman "believes gays should be able to get married, adopt kids and promote their lifestyle to your children."

Ironically, last year Harris hired Arthur J. Finkelstein, a Republican political consultant who married his gay partner in Massachusetts and adopted two children with him.

At the time, Harris told The Sun, "I don't ask for marriage certificates for every person who works for the campaign."

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NATIONAL NEWS

U.S. Army Sgt. Darren Manzella came out on the CBS-TV program 60 Minutes last month, complete with a video of himself and a former boyfriend kissing. (Photo: SLDN) NAT’L NEWS - continued from page 5

Manzella's case apparently is not unusual. The Servicemembers Legal Defense Network says there is now a record number of openly gay members of the military – at least 500 that the organization knows about.

Discharges under Don't Ask, Don't Tell have fallen sharply since the United States invaded Iraq in 2003.

Dykes on Bikes Wins Trademark Case

San Francisco's Dykes on Bikes motorcycle club won the right to keep its trademarked name Jan. 7 when the U.S. Supreme Court declined to hear the appeal of a man

who claimed the phrase is antimale, scandalous and immoral.

Attorney Michael McDermott of Dublin, Calif., had challenged the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office's acceptance of the trademark, claiming the word "dyke" is widely understood to describe "hyper-militant radicals [who are] hateful toward men."

He appealed to the Supreme Court after the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Federal Circuit dismissed the case in July, saying McDermott hadn't demonstrated how the organization's name harms him.

Asked for comment on the case's resolution, McDermott told the San Francisco Chronicle via e-mail that the Supreme Court "has largely signed on to the so-called homosexual agenda."

Sen. Craig Expands Legal Strategy

• Karsnia couldn't have been upset by Craig's actions – which allegedly included peering through a crack into Karsnia's stall, moving his foot invitingly and repeatedly sliding his hand under the stall divider – because Karsnia was moving his own foot enticingly.

• And disorderly conduct must be "offensive, obscene, abusive, boisterous or noisy," which, the lawyers argue, Craig's conduct was not.

Craig has repeatedly said he isn't gay or bisexual and doesn't cruise men's rooms, even after The Idaho Statesman newspaper published the stories of eight men who claim they had sex with him or experienced sexual come-ons from him.

Craig has maintained his foot moved into Karsnia's stall because, "I'm a fairly wide guy [and] I tend to spread my legs when I lower my pants so they won't slide," and that his hand went below the stall divider because he was fetching a piece of toilet paper that was underneath or stuck to his shoe.

U.S. Sen. Larry Craig, R-Idaho, who was arrested last summer for allegedly seeking sex with an undercover cop in a Minneapolis airport men's room, is trying some new legal arguments in his quest to have his guilty plea reversed by the Minnesota Court of Appeals.

In a brief filed Jan. 8, Craig's lawyers argue:

Trans Official Returns HRC Award

The president of the San Francisco Police Commission, Theresa Sparks, returned her 2004 Human Rights Campaign Equality Award during a meeting with HRC President Joe Solmonese in San Francisco Jan. 5.

Sparks, who is transgender, told the Bay Area Reporter she can't stand to look at the trophy anymore, given HRC's behavior during the continuing controversy over whether to include gender-identity protections in the federal Employment Non-Discrimination Act. In November, HRC supported a version of ENDA that protects gay people but not transgender people, after gay U.S. Rep. Barney Frank, DMass., insisted the bill would pass the House, which it did, only if "gender identity" were excluded from the language.

Hundreds of other national, state and local LGBT groups refused to support the "trans-free" ENDA, leaving HRC nearly alone in backing Frank's version.

The House-passed bill moves next to the U.S. Senate.

• Minnesota's disorderly conduct statute under which Craig pleaded guilty requires that "others" (plural) be alarmed by the conduct and, in Craig's case, only one other person was involved, decoy cop Sgt. Dave Karsnia.

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threatened or harassed.

The Scottish Conservative Party opposes the change. The party's justice spokesman, Bill Aitken, said, "In Scotland, we pride ourselves in the fact that we are all equal in the eyes of the law but some it now seems are more equal than others, which cannot be right."

LGBT-inclusive hate-crime laws already are in force in the rest of the United Kingdom.

Anti-gay protesters at the 2006 gay pride events in Riga, Latvia.

(Photo Nikolai Alekseev/ GayRussia.Ru)

Protester Found Guilty in Riga Pride Attack An assistant to Latvian MP Dainis Turlais was found guilty of gross public disorderliness Jan. 15 for throwing what was likely a bag of feces at celebrants attending the 2006 gay pride events in Riga.

Janis Dzelme was sentenced to 100 hours of compulsory labor by the Vidzeme District Court for demonstrating what the court called an obvious lack of respect toward the public by ignoring universally accepted norms of behavior.

"This is an enormously important precedent which will send very strong signals to those people in Latvia who believe that freedom of assembly and freedom of speech should be limited with violence," said Kristine Garina, chair of the pride-organizing group Mozaika.

Turlais is among the parliament's more anti-gay members. He reportedly has called gays "faggots" and "scum."

Last year's Riga pride went relatively smoothly but in 2005, when activists first attempted to march,

Scotland to Pass LGBT Hate-Crime Law

Scotland's hate-crime laws will be expanded to protect gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people, the Scottish Executive pledged in a Jan. 15 media release.

"I am delighted to announce today Government support for a bill which will extend statutory aggravations to cover crimes motivated

the 150 marchers were heavily outnumbered by around 1,000 anti-gay protesters who hurled insults, bottles and rotten eggs; blocked the streets; and forced the parade to be rerouted. The protesters chanted "No sodomy" and "Gays f--- the nation."

Then, in 2006, the City Council banned the parade. Organizers responded by holding a religious service at a church and meetings at a hotel. Attendees at both were attacked by Christian, ultranationalist and neo-Nazi protesters who pelted them with eggs, rotten food and feces.

Last year, armed with a court ruling that the 2006 ban was unconstitutional, more than 500 LGBT people marched around a fenced-in park under heavy police protection, dodging only a paint-bomb, an icecream cone and a few firecrackers.

Police outnumbered the marchers and the approximately 100 jeering anti-gay demonstrators.

by malice or ill will towards victims based on their sexual orientation, transgender identity or disability," said Justice Secretary Kenny MacAskill.

"Our clear aim is to prevent and deter crimes. But where crime does happen it will not be tolerated."

According to the LGBT Equality Network, a quarter of Scottish gays have been a victim of homophobic violence and two-thirds have been

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Homosexual Convictions of Six Moroccans Upheld

A Moroccan appeals court Jan. 15 upheld the convictions of six men from Ksar el Kbir who were jailed for homosexual acts in late November after a YouTube video showing them at a supposed gaywedding celebration provoked public outrage.

The 10-month sentence against the party's alleged organizer, who also was charged with selling alcohol, was upheld in full, while the other five men saw their sentences reduced from between four and six months to between two and four months.

Amnesty International says the men are prisoners of conscience, and the men's lawyers claim that prosecutors have presented no evidence that any crime took place.

Morocco's Penal Code Article 489 bans "lewd or unnatural acts with an individual of the same sex" under penalty of six months to three years in prison and a fine of $15 to $150.

Human Rights Watch has said the men were convicted "without apparent evidence."

"The men's rights to privacy and freedom of expression have been violated," said North Africa programs director Sarah Leah Whitson.

"They should be set free."

Wrongly Arrested BBC Host Awarded Damages

The host of the British Broadcasting Corporation program One Man and His Dog has received a $4,000 payout and an apology from the Gloucestershire Police after he was wrongly arrested for making a joke that referred to blacks and lesbians.

Robin Page was taken into custody on suspicion of inciting racial

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hatred several months after a 2002 speech at a pro-hunting rally in which he said, "If you are a black, vegetarian, Muslim, asylum-seeking, one-legged lesbian lorry driver, I want the same rights as you."

He was held in jail for 40 minutes until he agreed to be interviewed without a lawyer present, then was released without charge.

Page said the police accused him of committing a hate crime and that documents he later obtained using the Freedom of Information Act show his name is on a homophobicincidents register.

"I believe I have scored a significant victory over the ludicrous and sinister, politically correct 'hate crime' culture that is currently doing so much to prevent free speech in this country," Page said in a Jan. 15 statement.

"How can you be included on a homophobic-incident record for using the word 'lesbian' once in a speech? It is just incredible.

Political correctness is the new McCarthyism."

One Man And His Dog went off the air in 1999 after a 23-year run.

ILGA to Meet in Quebec City

The 24th World Conference of the International Lesbian and Gay Association will take place in Quebec City, Canada, May 14 to 18.

ILGA is a 30-year-old federation of more than 600 LGBT organizations and associated members, such as city governments, from 90 countries.

It has played a key role over the years in developments such as Amnesty International's decision to adopt persecuted homosexuals as prisoners of conscience and the World Health Organization's decision to remove homosexuality from its list of illnesses.

Gay Nursing Home Opens in Berlin

The first gay nursing home in Europe opened in Berlin this month.

The state-of-the-art facility will house 28 patients, who will be allowed to bring their own furniture and sundries.

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activist and architect Christian Hamm, told the Deutsche PresseAgentur news agency that gay people often feel ostracized in ordinary nursing homes.

"When you are old, the last thing that you want to do is to have to hide," he said.

The home is the first piece of a planned complex that will include apartments, a cafe, function rooms, a gym and a health-care center with doctors and therapists, DPA said.

South African AIDS Leader Marries

Well-known South African AIDS activist Zackie Achmat and his activist boyfriend Dalli Weyers were married near Cape Town Jan. 5.

South Africa is one of six nations where same-sex couples have access to full marriage.

Hundreds of people attended the wedding, including Mayor Helen

Zille. Gay High Court Judge Edwin Cameron conducted the ceremony, sporting eye glitter for the occasion.

The wedding cake was a chocolate-brownie tower with a king and a cowboy on top.

Achmat, 45, is the founder and chairman of the Treatment Action Campaign, South Africa's leading AIDS-activist organization.

"We decided that the marriage statement as a same-sex couple was a profound one and we want the union to be seen as equal," Weyers told the Sunday Times before the wedding.

Same-sex marriage also is legal in Belgium, Canada, the Netherlands, Spain and the United States (Massachusetts only). Numerous nations (and eight U.S. states and the District of Columbia) offer civil unions or registered partnerships that grant same-sex couples some, most or all of the rights and obligations of matrimony.

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by Rex Wockner

Brazilian Gay Activist Murdered

Brazilian gay activist Francisco Técio de Oliveira Soares was stabbed to death Jan. 3.

His naked body was found in the hair salon he ran in the northeastern city of Crato.

Police have speculated the killing was a crime of passion, given that nothing was stolen from the salon.

Técio, 38, organized several local gay pride parades and had been involved in gay activism for more than two decades.

Dutch Artist Receives Death Threats Over Gay Muslim Photos

Dutch artist Sooreh Hera, an Iranian exile, has received death threats and gone into hiding after a museum in The Hague planned to display her photos of gay men wearing masks of the prophet Muhammad.

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"They said to me, 'We're going to burn you naked or put a bullet in your mouth,'" Hera, 34, told London's The Times.

"They condemn homosexuality but in countries like Iran or Saudi Arabia it is common for married men to maintain relations with other men," she said.

The municipal museum later decided not to mount the photos because, said director Wim van Krimpen, "certain people in our society might perceive it as offensive."

Hera accused van Krimpen of "censorship" and caving in to "pressure from Islamists," and withdrew the rest of her pictures from the exhibition.

A museum in Gouda then said it will put up the photos. The director of that institution has received death threats and is under police protection, The Times said. continued on page 14

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TRASH TALK I

by Rahne Alexander

n some ways, it works best to introduce Electric Junkyard Gamelan with a joke: What do you get when you cross the ecstatic polyrhythms of Balinese gamelan with a wildly inventive composer who is not afraid to dumpster-dive a new instrument? That way, we're all in on the joke when we finally hear them perform their delightful but difficult-topigeonhole music.

TERRY DAME'S ELECTRIC JUNKYARD GAMELAN BRINGS INVENTIVE POLYRHYTHMS TO BALTIMORE The brainchild of composer Terry Dame, Electric Junkyard Gamelan (pronounced “gam-uh-lan”) has been evolving since 1998. The group consists of five musicians including Dame, Julian Hintz, Mary Feaster, Lee Frisari and Robin Burdulis who perform on innovative instruments such as the Rubarp and Big Barp (electric rubber band harps), the Sitello (an electric cello/sitar combo) and the Clayrimba (a three octave tuned clay pot "marimba").

While they have performed across the U.S., their first appearance in Baltimore will be at the Charm City Kitty Club February 1 & 2.

The musicians of the Electric Junkyard Gamelan are all prolific professional musicians in their own right, with dozens of musical projects between them. Dame, for instance, is a saxophonist who performs with a number of New York City-based artists, and she also composes music for films.

Gay Life interviewed Dame by phone from the Sundance Film Festival in Colorado.

What exactly is gamelan?

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Gamelan is traditional music from Indonesia. They have different forms of it, because Indonesia has a million countries. I was particularly inspired by gamelan from Bali.

Probably the most well-known music is from Bali and Java. The word "gamelan" refers to both the body of music and also the actual orchestra of instruments itself. It's a collection of xylophone-like metal instruments and gongs and lots of other things. It's fascinating music.

Does gamelan have a structure that differs from most western music?

You have a partner player, where one player plays mostly on the beat and the other player plays mostly off the beat, and together they make these really complex interlocking rhythmic patterns that are so cool.

The other thing that is really cool is those two instruments are slightly detuned from each other. When they play together the waves kind of [bounce] off each other because they're not exactly in tune. It makes these choirs of overtones; you'd think there were a hundred flutes playing along. It's really upbeat, high energy.

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What are the differences between Balinese and Javanese gamelan?

Balinese is much more upbeat. In Javanese [gamelan] the instruments are similar xylophone-type instruments; you play them will little mallets, but the actual keys that you strike are more wooden ones. The music is much mellower, it's slower whereas the Balinese is really high energy.

What attracted you most to compose and perform gamelan?

It's really hard to learn, so it's one of those musics that when you get it it's so satisfying to be in the middle of it. It's an incredible aural experience to be surrounded by this ringing choir of beautiful sound. There's all this rhythm going on. It's completely exciting. It's really fun. The Balinese people are really beautiful people, and they love music and art.

It's infused in every element of their culture. As opposed to our culture, which does not necessarily celebrate music and art. I used to be a regular member of the traditional Balinese Gamelan at the consulate in New York. We did a couple of double bills, sort of "Gamelan: Old and New." That was kind of fun. We do some world music events, but some people have a hard time knowing what to do with us, because we're kind of unclassifiable.

Has Electric Junkyard Gamelan worked with other gamelan acts?

We're not in any way a traditional gamelan. We're playing on invented instruments. [Since] the original inspiration for the group ten years ago, we've incorporated tons of other stuff. We've evolved in many other directions. All of that is included in our sound now. We still have the basic sound that many people come to and say, "Wow, in spite of these weird instruments you're playing, you really do get a gamelan vibe." I just like to make it clear off the top that no one should come expecting to hear any traditional [music]. Our music is all original.

How have your compositions evolved over the years?

Electric Junkyard Gamelan consists of Dame, Julian Hintz, Mary Feaster, Lee Frisari and Robin Burdulis who perform on innovative instruments such as the Rubarp and Big Barp (electric rubber band harps), the Sitello (an electric cello/sitar combo) and the Clayrimba (a three octave tuned clay pot "marimba").

The project grew out of my thesis concert in grad school. I teamed up with a choreographer and we did this piece called "Women's Work."

My task was to compose music for objects that were found in traditional domains of women's employment. So I had a piece that was all done on kitchen implements. We did an office supply thing with typewriters. That's where I invented the first instrument. It's called the Rubarp, which is [short for] rubber band harp. Its frame is coat hangers and rubber bands, the strings. We originally played it with paper clips on our fingers.

What drove you to make your music on invented instruments?

The first incarnations of the group were mostly found objects. It was a percussion ensemble, and then I started building string instruments and things like that. I've been a

www.baltimoregaylife.com • G A Y L I F E •

builder, putterer and inventor my whole life. I love making things with my hands. Those two things kind of fused. When I got back to New York after grad school a friend of mine asked me to be in this piece.

I can't remember the exact title, but it was something to do with butches and femmes in the auto shop. She said, "Make some music using car parts and stuff." I started with the ringy metal things and we were using tools and all kinds of crazy stuff. Out of that I was like, wow, that's a really similar sound.

Your instruments, like the Rubarp, are fascinating objects. Did you have a specific vision when you created them, or did they develop over time?

I don't even know how I came up with that idea of putting rubber bands on coat hangers, to tell you the truth. I definitely had my vision

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of making instruments with office supply. I was in grad school at CalArts, which is a really creative place, so who knows. I think I may have been taking some kind of electronics-building thing and made the pickup, because they're miked with little contact mics. I recall building contact mics and going around my house, sticking them on everything I could find to see what made a cool sound. The Big Barp was just an extension of that. That frame was a folding table base I found on the street. I wanted a bass-sounding instrument, so that's where that came from.

Electric Junkyard Gamelan will perform at the Charm City Kitty Club February 1 & 2.

For more information, visit www.terrydame.com/tdame_ejg.html or www.charmcitykittyclub.com.

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INT’L NEWS - continued from page 11

Straight Bouncer Called 'Breeder' Wins Discrimination Case

A straight bouncer at the Bournemouth, England, gay club Dreams was awarded $12,400 in compensation Jan. 4 because the club's manager called her a "breeder" and fired her, the BBC reported.

An employment tribunal in Southampton agreed that Sharon Legg, 33, was unfairly dismissed from her job.

She received $6,000 for hurt feelings and the remainder for the firing itself.

"It's an achievement basically for gay, bi and straight people," Legg told the network. "It's about basically proving a point that you just don't treat people like that ... whether you're straight, gay or bi."

"If ... the shoe was on the other foot, I don't think it would be tolerated," she said.

Traveling Government Exhibit Celebrates Czech Gay History

A government-curated exhibition documenting and celebrating Czech gay history has opened in Prague

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and later will travel around the nation, including to small towns, Radio Prague reported Jan. 9.

The exhibition's curator is the government's minister for human rights and minorities, Dzamila Stehlíková, and its coordinator is veteran Czech gay activist Jirí Hromada.

"Twenty years ago homosexual citizens were the first group who began to speak about human rights," Stehlíková said. "Now, after 20 years of gay and lesbian development, we have a registered-partnership law, and the homosexual minority is part of democratic society, with its own structure and with a very interesting cultural and social life."

The exhibition, now at the capital's House of National Minorities, includes gay magazines, old photos, and videos of the disturbing debate in the Chamber of Deputies over the registered-partnership law.

Openly gay singer Pavel Vítek told Radio Prague: "What I have been most taken by is ... the history, which you now forget, of the period at the end of the 1980s and the start of the '90s. And I have also really been struck by the discreditable language used by our politicians, both men and women, when registered partnerships were being discussed.

It's certainly worth hearing Justice

Minister Parkanová and others again!"

Stehlíková is excited about taking the exhibit on the road.

"In some small towns many people with homosexual orientation have complications with coming out and this exhibition will help them to understand their own identity and to begin to live their own lives," she told Radio Prague.

Gay Canadian Organ Donors To Face Extra Scrutiny

Males who had sex with a man within the past five years will face heightened scrutiny in the organdonation system under a Health Canada policy enacted in December, The Globe and Mail reported Jan. 10.

Health officials will speak to the donor's family and friends to glean information about the individual's behavior and warn potential recipients of the details.

Even though organs are tested for such things as HIV and hepatitis B and C, officials worry that the testing may not be definitive.

Canada bans blood donation by any man who has had sex with a man, even once, in the last 22 years.

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Moscow Polling-Place Protesters Acquitted

Thirteen gay activists detained Dec. 2 at a Moscow polling place have been acquitted by a local magistrate's court.

Some of the activists had "voted" by writing "No to homophobes – No to Luzhkov" on their ballots.

The activists – including Moscow Pride organizers Nikolai Alekseev, Nikolai Baev and Alexey Davydov – were taken into custody by police and security forces and held for seven hours at the Tverskoi district police station for allegedly picketing without advance notification to the authorities.

But the court determined that no picket had occurred and that police were unable to specify a crime the activists had committed. As such, it also was illegal for police to detain the activists for more than three hours.

"This is our first considerable victory in courts in the legal fight with Moscow authorities and Moscow mayor personally," Alekseev said Jan. 11. "Lawlessness of the authorities can be witnessed during all our actions but up to now we never won in court. This is a positive signal."

He said the activists may sue the police for illegal detention and arrest.

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OPINIONS General Gayety Bisexual, Stage Right

I've long supposed that some women are truly bisexual. I've long known that I'm not one of them.

Such matters are on my mind now thanks to a new study of bisexuality in women. The study, sure to generate a lot of chatter, followed 79 non-heterosexual women over 10 years. The key finding is that bisexuality appears to be a distinctive sexual orientation, and not a stage women go through on their way to being lesbians.

I do believe that for some women bisexuality isn't a transitional phase.

It's who they are. For me, bisexuality was indeed a stage. I entered the stage door a bisexual and exited it a homo.

Over 15 years ago I was firmly ensconced in therapy, working through, by and around several issues, including my orientation.

Though I'd managed to suppress the gay hints over the years, the truth lurked ever closer.

But which truth? I knew I was physically attracted to men, and also pulled in some sort of deep, mysterious way to women. What did this make me? Besides addled, of course.

Without ever having been involved with a woman, I accepted that I must be bisexual. Then I settled down to do nothing about it, because of my long-term relationship with a guy.

Mercifully for us both, we split, and I was free to explore my "other side" as we called it, making me sound like a werewolf. I started attending the local lesbian group, billed as being open to bisexual women. After a few months it seemed to me the group was entirely lesbian-focused, so one evening I screwed up my courage.

I raised my hand, outed myself as bi, and said I hoped this group really did welcome everyone. One woman whispered to me she was bi, too, and none of the other members threatened my person, so the effort seemed successful. I'd made the local lesbian group safe for bisexuals. Huzzah.

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by Leslie Robinson

In those early days I ventured to gay bars with new friends. One club had both male and female dancers on display. Well, the woman danced; the man stripped. I didn't know whom to look at.

I was there to check out women, but I still felt a sexual pull toward men. I'd spent a lot of years being hetero-directed; it wasn't going

without a fight.

I finally began dating a woman.

At one point she said something about the risk she was taking, dating a bisexual. It turned out I'd taken the bigger risk, dating a woman with the emotional knowledge of a frying pan.

I did get some important things from that relationship, including the discovery that sex with a woman seemed natural to me. After all those hetero impulses, I feared bedding down with a woman might send me screaming from the room.

Instead, I knew I was on the right track.

I never diverted from that track.

After about a year of being out, I realized I no longer called myself "bisexual." The word had simply dropped away without any conscious thought. It no longer applied.

dirty laundry

The Beginning

by Robert Maril "Amanda just called and told me that she's moving out," I told my boyfriend Paul on the phone, standing in my sister's new bedroom in Wichita, the only place in the house that I had any privacy. It wasn't even her room, really. Her room was back in our hometown and this one was different, foreign. It had all of my sister's furniture, the whitewashed princess-style bedroom set she'd grown up with and left behind when she'd moved out, but the room wasn't hers. It was as if people had taken the place I'd grown up in and thrown it into a bag, shaking it out and letting the pieces land where they may. The bedroom where I'd grown up hadn't even fared as well as my sister's: when I went home now I slept in the den in my parents' new finished basement.

Now, my roommate back in New York City had told me that she was doing exactly what I'd feared she'd do for a while, ever since I'd started spending most of my time at my boyfriend's place and stopped sleeping at ours. She was getting rid of the apartment we shared.

I'd have until the end of the month to find a new place to live.

"There's no way I can afford to keep that place," I said, "and I don't know anyone that I can move in with."

What would be the point in that, anyway? I'd only been visiting my apartment every two weeks to pick up things J A N U A RY 2 5 - F E B R U A RY 7 , 2 0 0 8

"Gay" did.

So ended my bisexual phase. It was a stage I needed to go through – at age 30 – for the same reason a chicken crosses the road, to get to the other side.

I was so mentally and physically entrenched in heterosexuality, and so blooming scared, that I needed this bridge of bisexuality to help get me where I really belonged. I'm not one for making a quick change.

Some 15 years ago, this overanalyzing, uptight gal was more likely to become a Hare Krishna overnight than a lesbian.

Leslie Robinson is not a werewolf, chicken or Hare Krishna. Email her at lesrobinsn@aol.com, and read more columns at www.generalgayety.com

that I needed and to make sure that it hadn't burned down. Was I really going to search Craigslist for a roommate so that I had somewhere to put my things? I wasn't going to spend any less time with Paul, whether or not I'd had to find a new apartment.

When I'd told my mother that Amanda was moving out and that I'd have to find a new place to live, she'd suggested that I move in with Paul. She'd said that it was only logical: I'd been living with him for the last five months anyway, and I was throwing away money paying for an apartment that was increasingly nothing more than a glorified storage space.

I didn't want to hurry it, though, moving in with Paul because it was convenient for both of us. Since we couldn't get married (or even have a civil union, for that matter, since we lived in New York and not New Jersey or Massachusetts), the decision to move in together meant a lot more than just cohabitation, a lot more than it did to straight people who could take each other for a test drive before deciding to tie the knot. Being with Paul, I'd finally let myself relax and be happy. After he moved to New York, I felt like I was at home for the first time in ten years. But were we ready to move in together? Was he?

"Put your stuff in storage," he said, "because there's not enough room for it here. You've pretty much been living here already, and it's totally stupid that you've been paying rent in Queens. Just move in with me." He made it sound so simple, as if it was the easiest thing he'd ever said.

I sat down cross-legged in the dark of my sister's new room and let out my breath, not realizing that I'd been holding it. I wouldn't have admitted it to anyone, not even to myself, but it was exactly what I was hoping he'd say. We'd have to find a storage space, have to talk about rent and bills and where he'd fit me into his apartment, but those were just details. There was no way for us to know what living together would bring, what taking this step would mean. But I had a distinct feeling that it was really just the beginning.

Robert Maril lived in Baltimore before moving to New York, where he's trying to make it as a classical singer. In the meantime, he's a secretary. Read more at www.reluctantreceptionist.com.

• G A Y L I F E • www.baltimoregaylife.com

OPINIONS

Farewell

In May 2003 I stepped in as editor of Gay Life to help out for a while.

Now four and a half years and 123 issues later it’s time for me to wrap up my final edition as editor and say my good byes. I’m moving on to other projects but want to acknowledge the people without whom Gay Life would never have been produced.

TRANSMISSIONS

Someone Like Me?

Nearly one year ago, I wrote an impassioned article supporting Susan Ashley Stanton in her fight to keep her job as Largo, Florida city manager. Like so many transgender people before her, she was being forced out of the job over her transition. Unlike most, her transition was taking place under the scrutiny of the National stage. In the end, she still was forced out of her job, then was not chosen for a similar position in Sarasota, Florida.

When I did that write up, I discussed an interview on “The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” with Largo’s former mayor, Robert E. Jackson. On it, he expressed his hope that Stanton would “not do what so many of them do. They get some ungodly make-up and some ungodly get-up and they mark it.

Say ‘I’m a transvestite.’”

He may have gotten his wish, in at least one way.

A year after the story broke, the St. Petersburg Times did a follow-up on Stanton. The piece was what I typically expect from the media when discussing transgender issues – every possible stereotype and salacious detail seems to be there – but included some quotes from Ms. Stanton worth noting.

In referring to being around other transgender people, she said it was “like I’m seeing a bunch of men in dresses.” Further, she does not fault groups such as HRC keeping transgender people out of the Employment Non-Discrimination Act (ENDA), because “Most Americans aren’t ready for us yet.

Transgender people need to be able to prove they’re still viable workers – especially in the mainstream.”

“The biggest issue against the federal legislation is that politicians think the ladies’ rooms will be invaded by guys in drag, instead of someone like me.”

Needless to say, when this story broke, the majority of the transgender community was stunned. Many felt like they were sold out, that a person they might have fought for last year was making it clear that

by Gwendolyn Ann Smith

she was not going to fight for them.

Many have assumed it to be a prelude to her working for the Human Rights Campaign, taking an “Uncle Tom” role in future attempts to get ENDA through congress.

Her boilerplate response to a mound of email after the article shifted the blame onto poor writing.

While she called the author of the article both a “gifted writer” and “personal friend,” she was left unsure how her words could be “so terribly misunderstood.” She did not, however, offer any clarification for her words to help those writing understand them any better, simply a somewhat callous sign-off.

“I am truly sorry you believe everything in the paper you read. I wish I could be so absolute in my trust.”

Her comments, presuming they were all quoted in-context, smack of elitism and belie an attitude familiar to anyone who has seen the socalled “transgender hierarchy” – a belief that some transgender people are more equal than others – in action.

For myself, I’m not outraged nor shocked. I’ve heard comments like hers many times from some in the larger community. I don’t want to spend much time playing “armchair shrink,” but it sounds to me as if Ms Stanton is still feeling her way through some of her own feelings about being transgender. The difference between her and so many others who have had to work through this is that Stanton is getting feature stories put out about her.

In the St Petersburg Times article, it mentions that a documentary crew is also busy shooting her. I suspect that we’ll see much more then.

Of course, if the documentary is like so many others, we’ll also get to see many wonderful images of Stanton trying on makeup in her bathroom mirror, or perhaps picking a favorite dress out of the closet.

Indeed, I think there are many lessons to come out of this, few being directly focused on the words continued on page 19

www.baltimoregaylife.com • G A Y L I F E •

To the many contributors over the years: Rahne Alexander, Michael Alvear, David Andrews, Rodney Ankeny, Josh Aterovis, Waris Banks, Beth Barnes, Kim Baydarian, Sydney Besen, Wayne Besen, Elisa Blum, Elizabeth Bolton, Everett F. Boyd, Natasha Brown, Robert Bruce, Robert Buchanan, Lady Bunny, Sean Cahill, Christopher Cappiello, Jennifer Carman, Kip Castner, Kevin Cathcart, Nancy Codori, Gina Coffman, Justin F. Collins, Sue Comstock, Suzan Cooke, John Corvino, D.C. Culbertson, Aimee Darrow, Arthur Dash, Diana Davies, Paula Davis, Patrick Dean, Kathleen DeBold, Anna de Jong, Meghan Devine, Jim Dietz, Elizabeth Disney, Dale Duncan, Mary Beth Dyer, Julie R. Enszer, Michele Evers, Madeline Feinberg, Lawrence Ferber, Rob Ferguson, Jack Fertig, Mike Fila, David B. G. Flaherty, Eia Folk, Anna Forbes, Tracee Ford, Erica Freudenberger, Dan Furmansky, Donna Wolfe Gatti, Steve Gdula, Eric Gray, Bill Green, Ken Green, Renee L. Green, Patrick Guerriero, David Haltiwanger, Paul Harris, Lauren R. Harrison, Kaitlin Haws, Rebecca Heck, Eva Hersh, MD, Julian High, Eric Himan, Phyllis L. Hubbell, Sarah Humble, Charlie Hunter, James Ireton, Shelton Jackson, Cheryl Jacques, Max Jiminez, Jon Kaplan, Jeffery Jensen, Adam Kelley, Deborah Keene, Dean Kirschner, Michael A. Knipp, Karen Konkel, M.D., Levi Kreis, Laura Laing, V. Holland LaSalle-Ricci, Rudy K Lawidjaja, Michael Lemmon, Tangier Lennox, Franny Lerner, Ed Lowe, T. Stewart Lucas, Zazembi Lumumba, Martha Macgill, John Parker Manwell, Alistair McCartney, Michael Jay McClure, Ian McIntosh, Steve Mandes III, William J. Mann, Robert Maril, Catherine Maslen, M.D., Chip Medford, B. Meekins, Nicholas Messing, J. Lawrence Miller, Ph.D., Tim Miller, Meredith Moise, Trisha M. Moore, Tom Musbach, Tim Nasson, Cara Michele Nether, Reginald Nettles, Andrew Noyes, Dan Odenwald, Mark Panos, Pauline Park, Jim Parks, Donna Payne, Rich Peters, Clare L. Petersberger, Tony Philips, Brian Pizza, Gina Pizza, Jeremy Polk, John Polly, Lisa Polyak, Holly Pruett, Rajeev Ramchand, Tara Reilly, Alexander Renault, Kianna Rhodes, Emily Richie, Glenda Rider, Pam Rigby, Charles T. Robinson, Leslie Robinson, W. Michael Rochelle Jr., Albert Rodriguez, Richard J. Rosendall, Mitch Rosenwald, Ann Rostow, Ben Ryland, Tracy Mitchell Salaam, Stephanie A. Saunders, Cydney Savage, Bill Schaefer, Dawn Scroggins, Jason Victor Serinus, Judy Shepard, Abigail Skillman, Jeremy Skinner, David Smith, Gwendolyn Ann Smith, Kindra Smith, R. David Smith, Joe Solmonese, Bob Steele, Heather Swain, Bruce G. Swanson, Harris Thomas, Paul K. Thomas, Sarah Tobias, Charles A. Towsley, Jr., Jorge Treviano, Dawn Tritaik, Matthew J Viator, Brandon Voss, Jay W Photos, Christopher Wallenberg, Dakini Weatherdyke, Ariel Whitworth, Stella Williams, Rex Wockner, Brooks Woodward, Tammy Wooliver, Arthur Wooten, Prudence Worthington, Jason Young, Matthew Zeiberman, and Joe Zuber.

To the other folks who have served on the newspaper staff I am grateful: Anthony McCarthy, Maddy Dwertman, Robert Blount, Alan Lesard, Marc Beachy, Tina Lazar and Brian Armstrong.

To Ron Crognale who is also wrapping up his stint as art director.

Thanks for helping produce a minor miracle every two weeks!

And thanks most of all to our readers and advertisers. Any community newspaper – like the community itself – is only as strong and vibrant as what each individual makes it.

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Cheers, Scott Baum

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OPINIONS SMITH - continued from page 17

that came out of her mouth.

Almost a year later, she cannot find work. To use her own words, she is having to prove she is still a “viable worker,” while the former city manager is given leads for low-end secretarial jobs. As a transwoman who has been there, I can relate to what must be a frustrating experience for her – stripped of the job she excelled in, she has been reduced to picking over the jobs no one else wants – and even when she applies, there is no guarantee the potential employer won’t turn her away simply for being transgender.

If only there was some sort of legal protections that could have helped her and people like her.

She’s had to deal with the media sensationalizing her life. I know this experience myself, from having to tell reporters that no, I will not adjust my makeup in a mirror for them, to reading articles that should be focusing on my work, but intend

spend their time picking apart my eyeliner and nail polish.

If anything, I feel a level of empathy – and sorrow – for Ms Stanton. I’m sorry that she might feel the need to lash out at other transgender people over what the Largo City Commission did to her, how the media presented her, and the continuing challenges of balancing her transition and family while struggling to find at least some viable employment.

I wish there was some way we could have reached out to her a bit better, helped her be better prepared for all that might befall her after that fateful day she began her transition.

Maybe it isn’t too late for Susan Ashley Stanton. Maybe then she could see that she, too, is someone like me.

Gwen Smith agrees that the St Petersburg Times writer is gifted, but that doesn’t make them fair. You can find Gwen at www.gwensmith.com.

Heath Ledger: More Than That “Gay Cowboy”

by Miles Christian Daniels It’s funny how we remember famous people.

Tammy Faye Bakker will always be remembered for her eyelashes.

Richard Nixon for Watergate. Luciano Pavarotti for his sprawling tenor voice.

And, if headlines are any indication, Heath Ledger for his Oscar-nominated performance in Brokeback Mountain.

Celebrities, for the most part, have little or no say in how they’ll be thought of. They put themselves out there and whether it’s baseball, singing, televangelism or acting, we, the public, decide their legacy.

I’ll admit. I wasn’t a huge fan of the “gay cowboy” film. Maybe it was the hype. I saw it late in its release and was expecting – I don’t know – something more. Could be I had accepted my sexuality years before and so much of the pain I had experienced through that process had been tucked away in my closet of now-fading memories.

Whatever the reason, I left thinking the film was just okay.

What I did come away with, however, was an appreciation for the bravery of both Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal for accepting the roles many of their counterparts had rejected for fear it might just ruin their respective careers.

And in spite of my disappointment with the film, Ledger and Gyllenhaal helped challenge a notion many of us in the gay community have battled with since our coming out, that we’re all effeminate, fashion gurus whose sexuality is defined entirely by stereotype – and even worse – by choice. This is why I have never been attracted to shows like “Will and Grace” or “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.” These, in my opinion, only confirm what many already assume.

In a 2006 interview with Fordham University’s The Observer, an unassuming Ledger said “… [we] wanted to tell a story of someone who transcends the label of straight or gay; he's a soul that falls in love with another soul within the vessel of a man.”

Ledger went on to say that his character, Ennis Del Mar, “was the most kind of complex and internal character I've been offered to play and it would take a very mature performance out of me to complete this character.”

Ledger received a Golden Globe and an Oscar nomination for his careerdefining performance in Brokeback Mountain. But, beyond the accolades and whether he meant to or not, Ledger also helped those like my father, three brothers, and friends I’ve known since grade school, come one step closer to understanding that being gay has nothing to do with stereotype and everything to do with love. Because of this, my hope is that Heath Ledger be remembered as an individual who made life just a little bit easier for folks like me.

Miles Christian Daniels lives in New York City and is the director of the documentary film, Dixie Queen. His columns have appeared in more than one hundred newspapers and magazines. He can be reached at danielsm@hmrifken.com.

Opinions expressed are those of the writers and do not necessarily represent the opinions of the GLCCB or Gay Life.

We welcome your letters and opinions. Submissions should include a name, address and phone number for verification and may be edited for content and length. Send submissions by e-mail to editor@baltimoregaylife.com or fax to 410.837.8889 or by mail to Editor, P.O. Box 22575, Baltimore, MD 21203. www.baltimoregaylife.com • G A Y L I F E •

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THEATER

Mrs. Warren’s Profession

Cirque Dreams Jungle Fantasy The Hippodrome Theatre is transformed into a jungle fantasy with 25 musicians and performers – aerialists, contortionists, clowns, strong men and balancers from around the world. Cirque Dreams Jungle Fantasy plays through February 3 at the Hippodrome Theatre. For ticket information, call 410-547-SEAT or click on www.france-merrickpac.com. (Photo: Carol Rosegg)

On the Stage Argonautika Through March 2 The Shakespeare Theatre Company, D.C. 877-487-8849 or www.shakespearetheatre.org The Brother’s Size Through February 10 Studio Theatre, D.C. 202-332-3300 or www.studiotheatre.org The Comedy of Errors February 15 - 24 Baltimore Shakespeare Festival, Baltimore 410-366-8596 or www.baltimoreshakespeare.org Doubt February 13 through March 9 Olney Theatre Center, Olney 301-924-3400 or www.olneytheatre.org Ella Through February 24 Arena Players, D.C. 410-728-6500 or www.arenastage.org

George Bernard Shaw’s tale of Mrs. Warren (Lisa Bostnar), a prostitute who Shaw described as "on the whole, a genial and fairly presentable old blackguard of a woman," and her prude of a daughter, Vivie (Natasha Staley). Cambridge-educated Vivie is horrified when she learns that her mother’s fortune was made managing high-class whorehouses and even more horrified when she finds out the business remains in operation.

At Rep Stage in Columbia through February 24. For tickets or more information, call 410-772-4900 or click on www.repstage.org.

(Photo: Stan Barouh)

The Glass Menagerie February 22 through March 29 The Bay Theatre Company, Annapolis 410-268-1333 or www.baytheatre.org

Light Up the Sky Through February 10 The Vagabond Players, Baltimore 410-563-9135

Six Dead Queens and an Inflatable Henry February 15 through March 8 The Mobtown Players, Baltimore 410-467-3057 or www.mobtownplayers.com

Glory Days Through February 17 Signature Theatre, D.C. 800-955-5566 or www.signature-theatre.org

The Mousetrap Through February 3 The Audrey Herman Spotlighters Theatre, Baltimore 410-752-1225 or www.spotlighters.org

The Sound of Music Through February 15 Toby’s Dinner Theatre, Columbia 410-995-1969 or www.tobysdinnertheatre.com

Hedda Gabler February 7 through March 9 Washington Shakespeare Company, D.C. 703-418-4808 or www.washingtonshakespeare.org

No Child…

Through February 17 Woolly Mammoth Theatre, D.C. 202-393-3939 or www.woollymammoth.net

Swimming in the Shallows February 6 through March 8 Catalyst Theater Company, D.C. 800.494.TIXS or www.catalysttheater.org

Killer Joe February 8 through March 8 Maryland Ensemble Theatre, Frederick www.marylandensemble.org

Off the Map Through February 17 Fells Point Corner Theatre, Baltimore 410-276-7837 or www.fpct.org

The Tricky Part January 29 through February 17 Signature Theatre, Arlington 703-820-9771 or www.signature-theatre.org

La Cage Aux Folles Through March 9 Toby’s Dinner Theatre, Baltimore 410-995-1969 or www.tobysdinnertheatre.com

Rosencrantz & Guildenstern Are Dead February 1 through March 8 CenterStage, Baltimore 410-332-0033 or www.centerstage.org

The Turn of the Screw Through February 24 Everyman Theatre, Baltimore 410-752-2208 or www.everymantheatre.org

See more theater listings online at www.baltimoregaylife.com.

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PENCIL ME IN Sunday, January 27

For the Bible Tells Me So Reel Awakenings is screening the doc For the Bible Tells Me So, a portrait of five Christian families – including Richard Gephardt and Episcopal Bishop Gene Robinson – and how they handle having a gay child or sibling. $7 at the Maryland Theatre (21-27 South Potomac Street, Hagerstown) starting at 3:00 p.m. For more info, click on www.reelawakenings.org.

Sunday, January 27 Sunday Sailaway Pride Nights Annapolis just got a little rainbowier with “Sunday Sailaway Pride Nights” featuring complimentary appetizers, $2 Fordham drafts, martini & wine specials, and of course, you and all your fabulous friends! At the Weather Rail Sports Bar in the Loews Annapolis Hotel (126 West Street, Annapolis) from 5:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m. To find out more, contact Randy Barnes or

by Scott Baum

Allison Trinkle at 410-295-3215 or 410-295-3216 or email rbarnes@loewshotels.com or atrinkle@loewshotels.com.

Friday, February 1

An Evening with Cleo Manago The Portal is hosting a discussion with Cleo Manago, a self-described social architect, activist, community organizer, essayist, media commentator, health and wellness expert and recipient of numerous awards. In 2005 Louis Farrakhan invited Manago to speak at the Millions More March, in Washington, D.C. Hear him at the Metropolitan Community Church of Baltimore (401 W. Monument Street, Baltimore) from 7:00 p.m. to 10:00 p.m.

Saturday, February 2

Trixie & Monkey Present “High Brow” Everyone’s favorite pixie and primate duo, Trixie Little & The Evil Hate Monkey, return with a high

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brow show featuring the triumphant return of Scotty the Blue Bunny (apparently the bans have been lifted after his last visit) plus the debut of Captain Elastico – “stretching the limits of justice” – Snacks (sound scientists Dan Breen and Tom Boram) and more! At The Ottobar (2549 N. Howard St., Baltimore) starting at 10:00 p.m.

More info at 443-850-0853 or www.trixielittle.com.

Thursday, February 7

The Eye in the Door Pat Barker’s novel The Eye in the Door is the story of British soldiers traumatized by WWI. Tormented Lt. Billy Prior is trying to figure out is he a coward or a hero? Gay or straight? Hero or coward? The GLCCB book group talks about The Eye in the Door at its next gathering at 7:30 p.m. at the GLCCB (241 W. Chase Street, Baltimore). For more info on the group, call 410-837-5445.

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Thursday, February 14

“This Is Burlesque” I won’t tell you to get out of town often – and then only if it’s for a very good reason – but in this instance, grab your sweetheart and head down to Northern Virginia to see Murray Hill – "the hardestworking middle-age man in show business" – Angie Pontani and The World Famous Pontani Sisters, and a host of others in this special Valentine’s Day burlesque show.

Murray Hill owned the stage at Baltimore Pride a few years ago, warming up the crowd for RuPaul.

“This Is Burlesque” at The Birchmere (3701 Mt Vernon Ave, Alexandria) starts at 6:00 p.m. For more info, click on www.pontanisisters.com or buy tickets at www.ticketmaster.com.

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MOVIES Cassandra's Dream

Ian (Ewan McGregor) needs cash to fund an investment that will support the posh lifestyle he imagines with his new actress girlfriend (Hayley Atwell). At the same time, his brother Terry (Colin Farrell) has racked up huge gambling debts.

Their rich uncle Howard (Tom Wilkinson) agrees to give them the money, but only if they murder his business partner. Woody Allen's third British outing is a straight drama with few laughs and little suspense as the morality tale spins not on what the boys actually do, but on how their consciences react.

The yarn is tissue-thin and contains only one real mystery: How did Allen manage to take McGregor and Farrell, two of today's most charismatic actors, and bleed them of all charm and personality?

Grade: CKinsey Scale: 1.5 (McGregor was bisexual in The Pillow Book and gay in Velvet Goldmine; he also starred in the Rock Hudson/Doris Day homage, Down with Love. Farrell played bisexuals in A Home at the End of the World and Alexander. Atwell appeared in the queer miniseries The Line of Beauty, and Wilkinson played transsexual in Normal.)

Cloverfield

Rob (Michael Stahl-David) is leaving Manhattan for a new job in Japan. A going-away party is being held in his honor. A friend is holding a video camera to document the party. And then the city is attacked.

What happens next is nearly 80 minutes of intense, hand-held camera point-of-view horror and madness.

To divulge more plot would cruelly spoil the excitement. But the filmmakers have absorbed all the good lessons of The Blair Witch Project and learned from the mistakes of sloppy action directors like Michael Bay and created a blast of explosively horrifying fun. It’'s the first summer movie of 2008, thankfully delivered in January, one that the real summer movies are going to have a tough time beating in the thrills-perminute department. Prepare to come out of your seat.

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Grade: A Kinsey Scale: 1 (Co-star Lizzy Caplan played "Janis Ian" in Mean Girls. Screenwriter Drew Goddard formerly wrote for Buffy the Vampire Slayer.)

First Sunday

Desperate for money, best friends Durell (Ice Cube) and LeeJohn (Tracy Morgan) break into a church, meaning to relieve it of its building funds. The caper quickly turns into a hostage situation when they interrupt Pastor Mitchell's (Chi McBride) church committee meeting and discover choirmaster Rickey (Katt Williams) holding practice. Slow, tone deaf, and completely predictable, this is more calamity than comedy, populated as it is by unfunny gags and rank stereotypes instead of characters. Ice Cube, McBride, and some of the supporting cast manage to transcend the bad writing and deliver decent performances, but Morgan's shrill, annoying turn dominates every scene. Williams garners the only laughs with the flamboyant and presumably queer Rickey's acerbic quips.

Grade: D Kinsey Scale: 2 (In addition to Rickey, another character is a transgender masseur, in a scene that uses LeeJohn's homophobia as a punch line. One of the church ladies is clearly a man in drag. Co-star Keith David was in Johns. )

The Kite Runner

Long ensconced in California after fleeing Afghanistan as a boy during the Soviet occupation, Amir (Khalid Abdalla) reluctantly returns to Kabul. As a child, he witnessed the rape of his best friend (and servant's son) Hassan (Ahmad Khan Mahmidzada) and said nothing, but in trying to save Hassan's young son from the Taliban, he gets a shot at redemption. This richly atmospheric drama – with China standing in for Afghanistan and the San Francisco Bay Area playing itself – limns not just heartrending conflict but also conflicting cultures. English actor Abdalla is excellent as a lifelong moral coward who finally learns to

Rob (Michael Stahl-David, left) and Beth (Odette Yustman, right) are terrorized by a monstrous creature in Cloverfield. (Photo: Sam Emerson)

transcend fear, but the soul of the movie lies in the moving performances of Afghan children Mahmidzada and Zekeria Ebrahimi, who plays the young Amir.

Grade: B+ Kinsey Scale: 2 (Hassan's attacker is portrayed as an adult still preying on young boys, presumably having grown into a gay pedophile.)

Mad Money

Bridget (Diane Keaton) is an upscale woman whose husband (Ted Danson) has been "downsized" by his well-paying corporate employer.

A quarter million dollars in debt and with their home on the block, Bridget takes a job at the Federal Reserve and convinces two coworkers (Queen Latifah, Katie Holmes) to help her steal money that's about to be destroyed. The comedy should begin here, and Keaton's presence alone should be enough to carry the movie, but she's battling a rotten script and limp direction that muzzles her talents.

As a heist movie, it's unimaginative and derivative, as a comedy it's flat and lifeless, and as a women's buddy-movie it lacks a strong point of view and interesting characters to make audiences care enough. Only hardcore fans should even bother sneaking in.

Grade: D Kinsey Scale: 1 (The movie is directed by Callie Khouri, screenwriter of Thelma and Louise. Queen Latifah has played a lesbian in both Chicago and Set It Off. Holmes co-starred in Wonder Boys.)

27 Dresses

Jane (Katherine Heigl) has been a bridesmaid 27 times and is obsessed with the idea of getting married.

Into her life walks a reporter (James Marsden) who is simultaneously falling for Jane and also bent on secretly manipulating her into participating in an article that will mock her and rip the lid off the scam that is the wedding industry.

Meanwhile, Jane's self-absorbed sister Tess (Malin Akerman) is about to marry the man Jane loves (Edward Burns), forcing Jane to help. Onlyin-movies plot machinations ensue, Jane and Tess are both humiliated, and a bizarre ending where happy fairy-tale resolutions trump female dignity turns this dull, unfunny "chick flick" into a nightmare for enlightened female viewers everywhere. Avoid at all costs.

Grade: DKinsey Scale: 1 (No queer content, but co-star Brian Kerwin played Harvey Fierstein's boyfriend in the film Torch Song Trilogy.)

See more movie reviews online at www.baltimoregaylife.com.

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www.glccb.org Services. Groups. Events.

Our calendar is now online.

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HEALTH

CAREGIVERS, TAKE CARE

by David Haltiwanger, Ph.D.

There are only four kinds of people in this world: Those who have been caregivers; those who currently are caregivers; those who will be caregivers; and those who will need caregivers.

Rosalynn Carter As America ages, the LGBT community ages too. Many of us are part of the Baby Boom generation. If we are getting gray, then our parents are really getting old! When I run into a peer that I have not seen in a while, it has become sadly predictable that our conversation will at some point get around to an update on aging parents.

It may just be sharing our worries about how to meet their increasing needs, but some in our community are already coping with the responsibilities of being a family caregiver.

You may not think of yourself as a caregiver, but you have entered “caregiver” territory if you are regularly assisting another person with routine activities previously performed without assistance. Maybe you drive your mother to and from medical appointments. Maybe you even step in to facilitate her communication with her health care providers.

Perhaps you stop by your parents’ house every weekend to do home repairs, house-cleaning, or yard work that has become difficult for them to manage. Maybe you are helping an older relative who is unsure about financial decisions or even needs help with monthly bill paying. If needs are greater, some of us may move back home to be of assistance or conversely take an elderly parent into our own home.

When there is a need for help with personal care, such as bathing and dressing, it can approach a 24-7 responsibility. Juggling this with other demands on your time – like a

job, a partner, children, etc. – can lead to major stress.

Gay sons and lesbian daughters may be even more likely to find themselves serving as the family caregiver. This happens because our married heterosexual siblings are often seen as too busy with the demands of their own families.

How accepting the family is of our homosexuality, however, can complicate matters. Your partner might be very willing to take some of the stress off you by helping out, but this is not likely to work if he or she has never been accepted by the family. I also remember the sad story of a Chase Brexton patient who had been kicked out of the house when she came out to her mother as a young lesbian and suffered years of hostile rejection by her family. When her mother was diagnosed with an advanced case of cancer, she was the daughter who was asked to come home. She did so and took care of her mother until she died. Imagine the added burden provided by their conflicted history and by the hope that this time it would be different, that this time she would find acceptance and love. The stress of the caregiving relationship can exacerbate old wounds, but it can also provide an opportunity for emotional healing.

It should not be overlooked that it is not just an aging parent that can place us in the family caregiver role.

The early days of the AIDS epidemic certainly saw many of us in the LGBT community stepping up to provide incredible caregiving for

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Caregiver Resources Caregiver Regional Resources – Maryland www.caregiver.com/regionalresources/states/MD/support/index.htm

Brain Injury Support Groups (Md., D.C., Del.) www.biamd.org/support_groups.htm

Grandparents & Relatives www.grandsplace.org/gp8/md.html

Area Hospitals (Variety of diseases within Md., and some in D.C., Del.& Va.) www.carefirst.com/mycarefirst/html/supportgrps.htm

University of Maryland Medical Systems www.umm.edu/resources/support_group.htm

Baltimore City Caregiver Resources (support, training, financial assistance) www.baltimorecitycaregivers.org

Baltimore City/Baltimore County www.caregiver.com/regionalresources/states/MD/support/baltimore_city.htm

Catholic Charities www.catholiccharities-md.org/Seniors/seniorinformation.html

Howard County General Hospital www.hcgh.org/events/list2.asp?id=3&pnid=13&cid=14 partners, friends, and neighbors.

Today, there are still people living with AIDS who rely primarily on assistance from family and friends.

There are also a variety of circumstances that can put us in this caregiver role, temporarily or long-term, when we really were not expecting it. In the blink of an eye, your hot and healthy boyfriend can be brought low by a serious car accident. Your full-of-life sister can be diagnosed with a terminal illness.

The birth of a child with special needs can instantly magnify the time demands of parenting.

However we get there, whether complicated by sexual orientation or

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gender identity or not, whether it is a full-time responsibility or just one more thing we struggle to fit into a hectic schedule, the caregiver role comes with stress. Not wanting to let down their loved one, caregivers sometimes neglect their own needs.

The truth is that if we do not take care of ourselves, we ultimately cannot be of much help to others. Leslie Ahern, a Family Care Advisor at ETHOS and the Caregiver Alliance in Boston, suggests that the new year is a good time for family caregivers to resolve that they will nurture and nourish themselves in order to stay in good emotional and • PA G E 2 9

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HEALTH FAMILY-BUILDING OPTIONS

by Hilary Neiman

Adoption and surrogacy are two rewarding and wonderful ways for couples and singles to build or expand their families. However, the continually changing and often confusing legalities governing adoption and surrogacy make it difficult to understand what countries and states are LGBT friendly. A brief review of the current adoption and surrogacy laws will help clarify family building options for the LGBT community.

In December 2007, Pres. Bush signed the Hague Adoption Convention, which protects children and their families against the risks of unregulated adoptions abroad and ensures that intercountry adoptions are in the best interests of the children. The Convention also serves to prevent the abduction of, sale of, or traffic in children.

Countries where the U.S. was formally able to adopt from that were LGBT friendly, such as Guatemala, are no longer adoption options for the U.S. because these countries are not signatories of the Hague Convention. To further complicate matters, many countries around the world, are also in a period of transition and are changing their own adoption regulations. For example, China, which used to allow adoption by unmarried persons, is now prohibiting adoptions by parents who are unmarried. China’s reasoning is that they wanted to increase their own domestic adoption program. Consequently very few, if any countries, are currently open to the LGBT community.

Although the adoption climate is not favorable for international adoptions, the domestic situation is still a great option for the LGBT community. In fact, there is a huge demand for parents and singles to adopt in the U.S. Families can choose either foster care adoption, domestic independent adoption, or domestic agency adoption.

In foster care adoption, families adopt children who are in the U.S. foster care system. The children tend to be older (ages three and up).

Foster care adoptions are created through public and state agencies.

An agency domestic adoption is when parents work with an adoption agency to help them match with a birth mother. The birth mother relinquishes parental rights to the agency. In an independent domestic adoption, families work with an attorney to help network and advertise. In this type of adoption, families play a more active part in their selection of birthparents.

All types of birthparents pick LGBT families for reasons that are personal to the birthparents.

Contact with birthparents range from completely closed, no access to medical records or any information from the birthparent, to more open, such as a card or letter each year. In most states, LGBT parents will have to adopt as a single person and have their partner go through a second parent adoption. However, in some states, parents can adopt together.

Despite the current difficulties with the international adoption climate, LGBT families should not be discouraged from adopting.

Domestic adoption remains a terrific way to build or expand families.

Another great family building option is surrogacy. There are two types of surrogacy; traditional sur-

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rogacy and gestational surrogacy.

Traditional surrogacy is using the surrogate’s ovum and the intended father or donor’s sperm.

Gestational surrogacy is using donor egg and the intended father or donor sperm. Also, adopted embryos can be used in a gestational surrogate.

In many states, such as Maryland and California, two dads’ or two moms’ names can go directly on the birth certificate. In other states, only one parent would be able to go on the birth certificate and the other parent would have to go through a second-parent adoption after the child is born. However, in some states, second-parent adoptions are not legal. Therefore, it is important to work with a surrogate in a surrogate-friendly state.

It is also important that parents and their surrogate enter into a carefully and properly drafted contract.

CAREGIVERS - continued from page 29

physical health so they can carry on the demanding role of family caregiver. After discussing with her, I want to share with you here my slightly revised version of the resolutions she suggested for caregivers in their latest “Caregivers Connections” newsletter.

In order to nourish and nurture myself, I will: • Learn to take one hour out of each day just for myself to read, enjoy a hot bath, journal my thoughts or call a friend.

• Remind myself several times each day that “I am not in this alone.”

• Reach out to my family and friends to help with my loved one so that the weight of my responsibility can be lifted and shared.

One way I can do this is to keep a list of needs handy so that when help is offered, I can be ready with an answer.

• Attend at least one caregiver support group a month to realize that I am not alone and that I can learn from others.

• See my doctor for a physical exam and give my own health needs more priority.

• Consult a mental health professional if stress is having a consis-

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It is necessary that all parties understand their rights and responsibilities. A surrogacy contract should detail each party’s duties and all the critical issues involved in the surrogacy process, such as confidentiality, abortion/selective reduction issues, medical/psychological screening, parental rights, contact, compensation, and expectations.

Both the parents and the surrogate need to feel comfortable with the contract before moving ahead.

Whether pursuing adoption or surrogacy, it is important to consult with an adoption and/or surrogacy attorney to make sure that you are well protected before you start down your road to parenthood.

Hilary Neiman is the founder of The National Adoption and Surrogacy Center in Rockville. Learn more at www.adoptionandsurrogacycenter.com

tently negative impact on my mood and my usual level of coping.

• Seek out one new resource to support my caregiver role, such as chore services, housekeeping, home care programs or delivered meals.

• Exercise at least 20 minutes three times a week for heart conditioning and stress reduction.

Even if all I can do is walk around the house, up and down the stairs, or put on some music and dance, I will do it.

• Try to find a way to laugh or find humor each day even amidst any sadness or discouragement I may also feel. If I am having a day when I am feeling that I cannot do this on my own, that is a signal that I should call a friend who always makes me laugh.

Actually, as I look again at those suggestions for caregivers, I see a lot that is good advice also for those who are not yet caregivers. So to all of you in this new year: Take Care!

David Haltiwanger, Ph.D., is director of Clinical Programs and Public Policy at Chase Brexton Health Services (www.chasebrexton.org).

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Q SCOPES "Curb Your Enthusiasm, Aries!"

by Jack Fertig

Venus and Jupiter, aligned in Capricorn, get a boost from the Sun and Chiron.

Opportunities abound through carefully planned teamwork. Efforts to heal – yourself, your community, your world – offer immediate satisfaction, although the real benefits will take a long time to become apparent.

ARIES (March 20 - April 19) Like the lead dog in a sled team, you may have to curb your enthusiasm and work better with others to get ahead more effectively. It will help to review or even revise your goals in consultation with your colleagues.

TAURUS (April 20 - May 20) New ideas that recently seemed radical and crazy begin

to make sense. Before committing to any of them, discuss them with an expert. If at work, talk them over with your boss. You are onto something big, but it needs work.

GEMINI (May 21 - June 20) New sexual adventures are impacting your libido and

also the way you think. In such cases, listening to new ideas is better than expounding on new half-baked notions. And if it was the sex that got you thinking, keep that up, too!

(June 21 - July 22) Any couple's sexual harmony is always evolving; yours is due for a Pleistocene event. Be open to big changes, but treat them as explorative – at least at first – and keep talking! Single? You're also up for experimentation, but with a wider choice of lab partners.

CANCER

(July 23 - August 22) Work on making your colleagues sparkle, and you'll shine all the more brightly. You may be feeling absolutely marvelous, but if anyone, especially your partner, makes any suggestions for your health, diet, or exercise, pay close attention!

LEO

VIRGO (August 23 - September 22) Staying healthy can be fun. Asian martial arts, dance classes, or any kind of sports activity can do wonders for your well-being, both physical and mental. Think of it more as a hobby than an exercise.

(September 23 - October 22) If you're looking for a new hobby or entertainment, try an old one. Follow the example of elder (preferably female) relatives, or look to them for inspiration. Your creative verve could start something great in your community.

LIBRA

(October 23 - November 21) Contact with your family can provide new information that's surprising and even profoundly healing. It is unusually easy now to heal old rifts and disagreements. It's also an excellent time to broach difficult issues with roommates.

SCORPIO

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 20) Small, spontaneous acts of generosity will be amply rewarded. However, having that as your motivation jinxes it, so be sure you give in ways that reflect your heart's desire and your best wishes for others.

(December 21 - January 19) Take a good, long look in the mirror.

What does your look say about your values and your aims? A friend's input should be helpful. New attire for the fashion statement you want to make can be an excellent investment.

CAPRICORN

AQUARIUS (January 20 - February 18) A big birthday party should be fun, but a

quiet retreat with a few people who are really important to you offers deeper satisfaction. Listen to your inner voices, especially when shopping for "new" clothes at thrift shops.

(February 19 - March 19) It's an old cliche that charity does more for the giver than the receiver. Get some pals together to work on a project that will do good for everyone involved. This could lead to bigger and better things, so think ahead to the next one!

PISCES

Jack Fertig, a professional astrologer since 1977, is a founding member of the Association for Astrological Networking. More info at www.starjack.com.

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Q PUZZLE Re-tractions

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Across

Down

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It tops a queen George O'Malley, et al.

Human Rights Campaign fundraiser, e.g.

One who screws around Switch end Put out The Most Happy ___ Bouncer for Amelie Mauresmo Director Norman of Prelude to a Kiss Local for gay people?

Anderson Cooper's network Sleep (with), to Shakespeare They come before chickenhawks Cock ending Language of Emily Dickinson?

Cut into cubes Wicks of the WNBA ___ fan tutte Subj. for those of a different tongue American Beauty director Mendes Came upon Where to find gay.com The Boys ___ Brazil Noise of the lambs Boneheads Pimp that solicits tops?

Big name in Canadian pumps Hot to trot Gaydar, for example A. Earhart concern Very short work of Albee?

Positions for Patty Sheehan Barbra's Funny Girl guy Gone With the Wind heroine Scarlett Drag queen's leg scraper Mouthful for a stallion "Over my dead body!"

Kristy McNichol sitcom Empty ___ You may go down on one Mortimer, with a wooden head

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Petty squabble with a lover, e.g.

Like Everett, as a movie husband ___ Children Make easier to bear Asian inland sea Gets the crabs out?

Juicy fruits Gladiator area Opera highlight Tree with a straight trunk Upright members First name in drama Place of the first fig-leaf codpiece "___ out!" (cry by Pallone) Not poz RN's offering Wood and more Born, in gay Paree Makes advances to, with "on" Good with the hands One from the land of the cut Places for men who don't date women Prez who shared a bed with Joshua Speed Doty's boyfriend?

Provincetown souvenir Realtor's letters See-through sheet Virginia Woolf's maiden name Bonheur, to herself Six Feet Under auto Alice portrayer on The Brady Bunch Master's partner Fruit peeler Cumming on The L Word Hidey-hole Singing duo Two ___ of Fun Male enhancement exaggeration?

Posed for Annie Leibovitz

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B-SCENE HEALTH & WELLNESS FAIR AT THE GLCCB PHOTOS BY JAY W. PHOTOS

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COUNTRY WESTERN TEA AT THE HIPPO PHOTOS BY JAY W. PHOTOS

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QUOTE UNQUOTE "We [Barry Manilow and I] were both so happy to have a gig that, you know, we didn't care because it was, you know, the guy was really nice to us and he was paying us what was really good money in those days, which was like $300 a night. I mean, that was an extraordinary amount of money in those days and we were just, like, we didn't care. We would have, you know, been at the zoo singing, we didn't care. We were just thrilled. ... I know people expect me to have been, you know, appalled and stunned and all that stuff. I mean, maybe they're surprised that I was so blasé. ... I had seen plenty by that time, so, I have to say, it was not a big surprise. I had a great time. They were great to me and I had a chance to learn all these songs and play all these songs and move into the mainstream, and it was just like a dream come true."

Bette Midler on performing in gay bathhouses in the 1970s, to TheStripPodcast.com, Jan. 10.

"The UK has gay marriage and I applaud you for it. But are you really going to tell me that everyone is now out of the closet? You may have gay marriage but you still have gay shame."

Actor Harvey Fierstein to London's Pink Paper, Dec. 20.

"In high school, everyone was like, 'I wanna be a doctor!' I was like, 'I wanna be on Survivor.' And I did it!

So now I'm like, cool, I'm 22 and my goals are accomplished. What next?

There's always a possibility of going back to college, but it's a possibility of not knowing what to go into, ultimately."

Openly gay Utahan Todd Herzog, winner of the most recent season of TV's Survivor, to the gay newspaper QSaltLake, Jan. 3.

"I find the city fulfilling in the same ways I always have. It's so physically dazzling; it has a small-town vibe with cosmopolitan attitudes. And nowadays it's quite simply my home. And something I am so heav-

ily identified with I probably would feel weird living anywhere else."

Tales of the City author Armistead Maupin talking about San Francisco, to The Out Traveler, spring 2008 issue.

BY REX WOCKNER "This bill would establish a clear rule that the federal government will provide the same benefits to all its employees regardless of sexual orientation. This is not only the right thing to do, it is smart policy. This bill will treat domestic partners with the equity and fairness they deserve."

Presidential candidate and U.S. Sen. Hillary Clinton, as she co-introduced the Domestic Partner Benefits and Obligations Act in late December. The measure extends all spousal rights to federal workers' same-sex partners – in areas such as health, long-term care and retirement benefits, and the Family and Medical Leave program – as well as spousal obligations in areas such as anti-nepotism and financial disclosure.

"Except on gay marriage, [Barack] Obama has hit all the right notes on the gay rights issues of the day, and he has refused to pander. He has chastised conservative black pastors and white evangelicals alike for opposing gay rights and aggressive HIV prevention. He even refused the demand from gay activists that he reject the support of Grammywinning gospel singer Donnie McClurkin because he claims to be 'ex-gay.' Obama is the only candidate who talks regularly about gay rights, including civil unions, in front of national audiences, and he is the candidate best suited to reach out to independents and Republicans in the general election and in fulfilling the promises he has made as a candidate. If you can vote in the Democratic primary of your state, there is no better candidate on gay rights than Barack Obama."

"Gay rights are inevitable. How long the road, how painful the journey, how expensive the struggle are the only details. And they are just details."

Actor Harvey Fierstein to London's Pink Paper, Dec. 20.

"I seldom read The New York Times.

It's written as if every one of their readers is a heterosexual white male. To me they almost speak a foreign language."

Actor Harvey Fierstein to London's Pink Paper, Dec. 20.

"Really, has there ever been a phonier, flip-flopping panderer in the history of politics than 'Full of Mitt' Romney? He is so plastic that I bet he has 'Mattel' tattooed on his behind. If Romney became president, it would be like watching a four-year video loop of the movie IRobot, minus the action scenes.

How anyone could actually pull the lever for someone so utterly devoid of character, conscience and consistency is a mystery."

Syndicated gay-press columnist Wayne Besen, Jan. 2.

read more quote unquote @ www.baltimoregaylife.com

Syndicated gay-press columnist Chris Crain in a Jan. 3. filing.

"New Hampshire's decision to recognize civil unions and grant gay and lesbian couples the same rights granted by the state to heterosexual married couples is an important step forward on the march toward equality, fairness and justice."

Presidential candidate John Edwards in a Jan. 1 statement.

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MARKETPLACE Employment Disease Intervention Specialist

Baltimore City Health Department is seeking qualified candidates to work for the Baltimore City Health Department STD/HIV Prevention Program

Improve the health of Baltimore City residents. Be part of an innovative team. Interview patients infected with STDs to prevent the spread of disease. Identify, locate and inform their social contacts and assist them with testing and access to treatment. Obtain urine or blood specimens in the field for STD diagnostic testing according to established protocols and transports to clinic. Develop valuable interviewing, time and case management skills. Supportive workplace environment and excellent benefits.

Salary: $29,870-$47,380, $1.00 / hr given upon completion of field phlebotomy is included.

Requirements: Bachelor's degree in science, one year experience in health education, or social science field or equivalent required.

Please send resume and cover letter to the address below by January 31, 2008.

Attn: Glen Olthoff, Program Manager Baltimore City Health Department STD/HIV Prevention Program 210 Guilford Avenue, 3rd Floor Baltimore, Maryland 21202 Fax: (410) 625-0688 Email:glen.olthoff@Baltimorecity. gov EOE

LADIES, LADIES, LADIES Interested in a DJ position? Please send a resume and current (2007) CD of your music to: DJ Search 241 W. Chase St. Baltimore, MD 21201 PA G E 3 8 •

LOVE CANDLES? I'm looking for Fun People to join my team- Be in Business FOR Yourself, Not BY Yourself. Call Laurie 571-723-3053.

House For Rent 2129 CORALTHORN: COMPLETELY RENOVATED 3BR IN HAWTHORNE AREA All brick, end of group home. L/R, D/R, Kitchen with bar and appliances. All hardwood flrs, ceiling fans. Finished club bsmt with separate laundry room. Gas heat, gas dryer hookup. Shed with electricity. $1350/mo. Call 410-483-4876.

FOR RENT

From $1400/mo. Mt. Vernon/Sta. N. NEW 3-4 bdrm. 2.5ba GARAGE, TH in Arts & Ent. Dist. 2 blks from Penn Sta.,/Univ. of Balt. Near JHU & MICA.

Call 410-367-3278

DO YOU WANT TO START 2008 WITH A BANG! DOES BAD CREDIT AND OVERDUE BILLS MAKE IT LOOK IMPOSSIBLE? GIVE D.B.G. CREDIT SPECIALIST A CALL AND APPLY FOR A LOAN NOW! 1-888-414-0006 WE CAN MAKE THE IMPOSSIBLE LOOK EASY!

Massage GREAT MASSAGE Swedish or sensual, by attractive guy with awesome hands.

Incall/Outcall, reasonable rates, 15 years experience.

Craig 410-336-8956 or Craiginbaltimore@comcast.net

BALTIMORE’S BEST MASSAGE Leave your stress behind & feel your best. Available days, evenings and weekends. $5.00 discount for appointments before 6PM. Gift certificates available. Call Marc @ 410-653-3084.

FULL BODY SENSUAL MASSAGE 6'1 200lbs, Athletic. Sessions for Both Men, Women, & Couples.

Call Tony @ 443-286-8173

PROFESSIONAL MASSAGE Certified massage therapist experienced in Swedish and Deep Tissue.

Conveniently located studio in private home near JHU. Flexible hours. Gift certificates available.

Paul 443 803-2538 BRAD'S SPECIAL TOUCH A hot full body/full satisfaction massage in your home, hotel, or my NEW waterfront Studio. Guys or couples. Visa/MC. (443) 6950141 or baltomann@hotmail.com

Anytime, online @ www.baltimoregaylife.com

Open Thur-Sat 11-6 EHO

House For Sale GORGEOUS TUDOR FOR SALE $230,000 4 Bedroom, 1 1/2 bath stone and brick tudor for sale. House has a 2 car garage in prominent neighborhood. House is in need of TLC and owner with a vision. House has equity. Call Marie to see @ 202-3212791 or Jerry at 443-858-0790.

Roommate Wanted ROOMMATE TO SHARE HOUSE Looking for responsible professional to share 3 bedroom house. Nice neighborhood, close to highway and downtown. $600 utilities included. Call 443-889-0366.

It’s easy to place your

Solution to puzzle, page 33

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