Whenever I attend a Hachnasas Sefer Torah, I am struck by the immense joy and heartfelt celebration that accompanies the event. Despite the fact that many shuls today are blessed with an abundance of Sifrei Torah, the addition of one more Torah to an already full Aron Kodesh inspires unparalleled jubilation. What is it about a Hachnasas Sefer Torah that stirs such profound emotion and unites the hearts of Jews in extraordinary simcha? I heard an answer from beloved Rebbe, Rabbi Yissochor Frand Shlita, who said the following in the name of Rav Asher Weiss. He explained this phenomenon as rooted in the deep, mystical connection between every Jewish neshama and the Torah, with each soul linked to a specific letter within it. This intimate bond transforms the celebration into a deeply personal experience, much like rejoicing at one’s own simcha, such as a child’s wedding or Bar Mitzvah.
This connection is powerfully illustrated in the story of Rav Chananya ben Tradyon. When he was martyred by the Romans, wrapped in a Sefer Torah and burned at the stake, he famously declared, “I see the parchment being consumed, but the letters are flying off.” His disciples understood this as a profound message: while physical destruction can extinguish the body, the eternal essence of the Jewish people—their souls and their connection to Torah—endures forever. Just as the letters of the Torah transcend the physical parchment, the soul of Klal Yisrael transcends the challenges of galus and persecution, ensuring the Torah’s survival and the continuity of the Jewish people. This eternal bond between the Jew and the Torah is what makes a Hachnasas Sefer Torah such an extraordinary celebration.
This past Sunday, I had the privilege of attending a Hachnasas Sefer Torah for a new Torah dedicated to
Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah (Zidichover Rebbe). The celebration was not just a simple ceremony but an entire weekend of joy and reverence centered around the Torah. From the inspiring tish on Friday night to the learning programs, gala kiddush, siyumim, shalosh seudos, and expanded Avos U’banim programming, every moment reinforced the centrality of Torah in our lives. The pinnacle of the weekend was the regal procession: children wearing crowns carried flags and torches, while a vibrant Torah truck, complete with the Shira choir and lively music, set the tone for the spirited dancing. Men, women, and children dressed in their finest Shabbos attire danced with heartfelt joy under the chupah as the new Torah made its way to its new home.
When the procession finally reached the shul, an awe-inspiring sight awaited us. The other Sifrei Torah were held aloft in a gesture of honor, forming a magnificent welcome for the new Torah as it entered its new home. The simcha only intensified, with leibedig dancing filling the shul as the crowd celebrated with unrestrained joy. The Torah was then placed in the Aron Kodesh with a sense of reverence and triumph, sealing the weekend’s message: the Torah is the heart of our existence, and our lives revolve around its eternal wisdom. Witnessing this celebration, I couldn’t help but feel a deep connection to the Torah, its letters, and the shared essence of our people. It was a reminder that the Torah is not just a scroll—it is the source of our being, uniting us across time and space in an unbreakable bond of simcha and dedication.
Wishing everyone a peaceful Shabbos
Aaron Menachem
and mazal tovs to
Around the Community
Igud N’Shei Ha’avreichim Hosts A Super Fun Carnival
An inspiring new initiative, Igud N’Shei Ha’avreichim of Baltimore, hosted an extraordinary carnival Thursday afternoon in Bnos, for the wives and children of the Kollel Yungerleit, who were learning while many enjoyed Thanksgiving off. With inflatables, snow cones, popcorn, a pizza supper, an acrobatic show, and over 15 exciting booths run by the children of the Yungerleit, the event brought together women from the many Kollelim in town. The idea behind this initiative is to unite and honor the dedication of these women who are all part of one family supporting their husbands’ learning.
Each woman received a special package with iced coffee, a danish, and an inspiring poem as well as a beautiful planner, while the children left with bags filled with prizes and treats. The energy was palpable and the women left feeling energized, appreciated, and united in their shared mission.
Inspired by the words of Rabbi Akiva, “Shela Hi” – “it is hers,” this initiative aims to continue offering meaningful events and programs for these incredible women.
Mercaz Torah U’Tefillah Celebrates A Hachnasas Sefer Torah
individualized Jewish wisdom sessions
1000unique individuals engaged in Etz Chaim programs this past year - most attended multiple programs.
100 group Jewish wisdom sessions
14 Wine and Wisdom events that engaged almost 150 unique individuals
25events for YPs /StudentsGraduate
Yeshivas Toras Simcha Hears Words Of Torah From Local Rabbonim
Recently, the 5th through 8th grade Bochurim of Yeshivas Toras Simcha heard beautiful Divrei Torah from two local Rabbonim. Rabbi Shmuel Kimche shared two phenomenal sto-
One week later, the Bochurim were zoche to hear from Rabbi Menachem Goldberger, Rov of Tiferes Yisroel, who shared insights and depth on the sugya of Allowing the Ohr HaGonuz, hidden form Ma’aseh Breishis, into
Neuro Clics helps people struggling with the following symptoms:
Reading Dif culties
Dyslexia
ADD / ADHD
Social Awkwardness
Poor Memory
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Easily Overwhelmed
Darchei Noam Visits Sterling Care
Sterling Care Assisted Living was honored to be visited by 21 young men from Darchei Noam Montessori. The students were from 1st - 6th grade, however their poise and presentation made them appear to be much older and mature. They sang gorgeous songs for the group of seniors ranging from 70 years old to 95 years old, who all appeared much younger as they were clapping along and enjoying the music.
Songs included classic pre-Chanukah music such as Al Hanisim and Yevonim, as well as newer and recently recorded numbers. The group sang as a well-rehearsed choir, including stunning solos and duets. Afterwards they took the time to share beautifully created cards with individual residents.
The final song was Ani Maamin after which the boys marched out while
singing Leshana Haba B’Yerushalayim. We hope that displays of chesed of achdus like this will indeed result in the Jewish people’s return to Yerushalayim Habenuyah.
JCFL By Your Kitchen Spot Completes Week 5 Of The Season
Read below for highlights from Week 5 of the JCFL season:
Allstate Insurance – Yaakov Schmell 27
Y&L Landscaping 7
On a blistery cold December morning, Allstate-Schmell faced off against Y&L Landscaping in a crucial matchup between 2-2 teams, each vying for a playoff spot. The first half was a defensive battle as both teams traded goal line stops and end zone interceptions. Allstate-Schmell managed to convert a crucial 4th down TD pass to Dany Donaty on the last play of the half to take a 6-0 lead into the break, aided by a diving grab by Zach “Wienel” Schnitzer. Despite the lead, Allstate-Schmell was frustrated going into the half and the emotions spilled over into the locker room.
Out of nowhere, Yehuda Abedon (recently called up from the practice squad), who had shown up to the game in just shorts and a T-shirt, gave a rousing and impassioned speech that would make Jameis Winston blush. Abedon’s speech inspired the Allstate team who began the second half with 3 consecutive TDs and 3 consecutive defensive stops. 2 of the touchdowns went to Dany Donaty whose 3 TD game highly impressed his sons (whom he had forced to come watch him play.)
After the game, Donaty credited his performance to his chemistry and familiarity with Yudkowsky, built up through years of mild acquaintanceship. The story of the day though was the dominant play of Allstate-Schmell’s offensive and defensive line of Neil ‘Ironman’ Gerstman, Ezra Rosen, and Yehuda Abedon.
AMP Solutions 31
Baltimore CTC 31
AMP led CTC 15-13 at the end of the first half — which featured a Pick-6 by CTC supersub Dovid “Cole Slaw” Shugarman from the goal line with 1-second remaining, followed by a Pick-1 by AMP Captain, Yaakov Rosenblum, on the
ensuing conversion attempt!
In the second half, CTC QB Mahyer “Rocket” Reischer hit Avromi “Olive” Gartenhaus for his second TD (as well as many short passes throughout the game) and on the next drive, connected with Aron “Feisty Meisty” for another score. CTC took a 25-15 lead.
AMP scored two late TDs to go up 31-25, but Reischer found Meisty in the left corner of the end zone to tie the game with under a minute left for a dramatic TD.
And then came “The Play,” which will be debated about for years to come. Going for a 1-point conversion and the lead, Reischer threw to the right side of the end zone. Mitch “Crunchberry” Gross made an incredible diving catch ... the ball moved as Mitch hit the ground, and he came up with it... but had the ball hit the ground, or only his bottom hand? The back judge, standing right behind the play, signaled incomplete. (Refer to Shloimy Scheinfeld’s Pulitzer-winning Zapruder film of “The Play” and then harass Commissioner Dovi Ziffer with your opinion.)
In the closing seconds, Rosenblum heaved the ball downfield to a seemingly open receiver in back of the end zone ... but Meisty outran the ball’s speed for the last 10 yards, dove and tipped it just enough to alter its trajectory and it fell incomplete, sealing the tie. (In one of life’s mysteries, 66 years after the Baltimore Colts won the first NFL overtime game, the JCFL continues to not play overtime during the regular season.)
ActualEyes
quarterbacks, none of whom found a rhythm. ActualEyes’ David May intercepted Tiger’s first throw of the day for a touchdown. On offense, ActualEyes strung together a successful first drive led by a 20-yard catch and run by offensive coordinator, Aryeh Pliskin.
Later, ActualEyes WR Yoni Gugenheim caught a deep pass, 15 yards behind the defense, for a touchdown. Chaim Baruch “CBL” Lefkowitz added another long touchdown just before the 2-minute warning. Despite ActualEyes’ overall dominance, the game was still close thanks to a long TD catch by Asher Meth and his effective scrambling.
ActualEyes tried running out the clock, but May ran untouched thanks to tremendous blocking. Trying to control the clock, May awkwardly slipped at the 1-yard line. However, May shoveled it to Gugenheim on the next play for a touchdown. With a glimmer of hope, QB Asher Meth heaved a “Barad Miryam” downfield, which was ultimately intercepted by May. He returned the ball to midfield and slid to end the game, opting not to run up the score and living up to ActualEyes’ well-earned reputation as a team with excellent midot.
24
Tiger Heating & Air 12
It may have been Rosh Chodesh Kislev, but the weak and the few would not prevail over the many and the strong in week 5’s matchup between ActualEyes and the substitution-less Tiger Heating and Air. ActualEyes’ Strum-Luchansky D-line harassed QB Ezra Bregin to his body’s breaking point (Refuah Shleima). Tiger used three different
Evergreen Benefits Group 66 Bunny’s Home Care 21
In the week 5 battle between Evergreen and Bunny’s, Evergreen took home the win.
Bunny’s started off in control, as QB Chaim “not Finkelstein” Fink connected with WR Avner “Shotz Shotz” Shotz for two impressive TDs. Evergreen responded with a TD to TE/DL Avrami Freund and con-
verted the 2-pt attempt, but Bunny’s held a 13-8 lead midway through the first half.
From that point forward, it was all Evergreen. The “Boys in Black” (and white) exploded for 50 consecutive points, scoring on every offensive possession and one defensive possession. Highlights included multiple TD passes from Evergreen’s VP of Business Development and weekend QB Chaim “not Fink” Finkelstein, multiple TD receptions by all-JCFL WR Shloime Scheinfeld, and highlight reel TD catches by Avrami Freund, Benzion Shamberg, and Yoni Finkelstein.
Yoni’s TD (which has since been described by Yoni as “the play of the year”) was an impressive, back shoulder, toe-tapping catch in the corner of the end zone.
On the defensive side, Evergreen was equally dominant as Chaim Finkelstein had a pick-6, Freund sacked Fink in the end zone for a safety, and Yoni Finkelstein had a red zone INT of his own.
New from
Another Fascinating Volume of Kisvei HaRambam
Discovering the Gifts of Chanukah, Tu B'Shevat, and Purim THE EOM EDITION
Enter the thought-world of one of the greatest Rishonim — and see how other great Rishonim discuss his works. In Kisvei HaRambam, selections of Rambam’s writings are elucidated and annotated, with additional insights illuminating the many concepts he discusses.
THIS VOLUME INCLUDES:
Shemonah Perakim • Commentary to Avos • Letters: To Ovadiah the Convert; Regarding Man’s Lifespan; Regarding the Music of Yishmaelim; and Management of Good Health of the Soul • Selections from Mishneh Torah Hilchos Dei’os and Hilchos Teshuvah • Chapter 12 of R’ Avraham ben HaRambam’s HaMaspik L’Ovdei Hashem • Ramban on Bamidbar 20:8 and Ritva’s Sefer HaZikaron on Parashas Chukas
New!
by Rabbi Yaakov Feitman
Rabbi Yaakov Feitman, a beloved Rav and author, shares his wise, discerning and often witty perspectives on Chanukah, Tu B’Shvat, and Purim. Rabbi Feitman has a gift for making profound ideas relatable and practical. He weaves together stories and insights from across the spectrum of our gedolim and shares new and refreshing ideas that give us a deeper appreciation of these special days — and the unique nature and power of each one. This is a book that will enrich these “days of gratitude” — and our lives — throughout the year.
INSPIRING JEWS ... ONE BOOK AT A TIME
New!
New! Volume 2
THE
TORAH BEHIND TODAY’S HEADLINES: Fascinating Discussions on Halachos of War and Defending Against Terrorism
by Zvi Ryzman
As Israel battles so many enemies, and Jews throughout the world face an upsurge of anti-Semitism, Zvi Ryzman turns his enormous scholarship to these issues.
Among the many captivating topics explored are whether congregants may bring firearms into shul, whether soldiers should risk their lives to recover the bodies of fallen comrades, and whether Shabbos may be desecrated in response to a mere suspicion of a terror attack.
This timely book provides a compelling and insightful exploration of the halachic issues at the heart of today’s headlines.
Greater Washington: Around the Community
Israel Portnoy Shines In Silver Spring With An Intimate Bonfire Performance
This past week, a small and intimate crowd in Silver Spring had the unique opportunity to experience a soulful performance by Israel Portnoy, a rising star in the Jewish music world. Portnoy, a talented singer-songwriter known for his authentic sound, took center stage around a cozy bonfire, offering a blend of original songs and classic Jewish tunes that resonated deeply with the audience.
Israel Portnoy, who hails from the famous Portnoy brothers—a wellknown musical family—has long been immersed in the world of Jewish music. Growing up surrounded by the harmonies and melodies that define his family’s musical legacy, Israel developed a passion for music that has only grown with time. Over the years, he has carved out his own path in the Jewish music scene, blending traditional sounds with contemporary influences. Each year, he garners more recognition, building a growing fanbase for his heartfelt compositions. Portnoy’s original songs, many of which draw inspiration from his child-
hood and personal journey, were deeply moving. His lyrics, which explore themes of faith, growth, and community, captivated the crowd, creating an atmosphere of reflection and unity.
“I grew up surrounded by music,” Portnoy shared with the crowd. “It’s always been a part of who I am, and it’s a blessing to be able to share this music with all of you. A lot of my songs come from my experiences growing up and my time on the Carlebach Moshav in Israel. It’s my way of connecting with my roots—and with you—through song.”
Portnoy’s time living on the Carlebach Moshav in Israel has profoundly influenced his music. “Living on the Carlebach Moshav was a life-changing experience for me,” Portnoy reflected. “It was a place of prayer, music, and spirituality—a place where I could truly connect to my roots. Even after the moshav burnt down, the lessons I learned there continue to shape my music and my journey.” Portnoy survived the devastating fire with nothing but the clothing on his back and his cherished 12-string guitar.
As Portnoy’s music continues to evolve, his blend of original compositions and timeless classics, infused with the wisdom and spirituality he gained from his time on the moshav, strikes a chord with Jewish communities worldwide. His authenticity, passion, and ability to connect with his audience on a deep level are
WEEKLY CALENDAR
what set him apart in the Jewish music scene.
For those fortunate enough to be there, the night around the bonfire was one to remember—a celebration of faith, music, and community that will stay with them long after the embers faded.
DECEMBER 9TH- DECEMBER 13TH
Monday December 9th
9:30 am
Yoga with Deborah Bandos
10:00 am
Baking with Ms. Hirschman
11:00 am
Discussion Group with Rabbi Karp
1:00 pm
Arts & Crafts with Shifra
2:00 pm
Piano with Mr. Taragin
Tuesday December 10th
9:30 am
Yoga with Deborah Bandos
10:15 am
Anagrams with Malka Zweig
11:00 am
Discussion Group with Rabbi Karp
1:00 pm BINGO
1:45 pm
Guitar with Yossi K
Wednesday December 11th
9:30 am
Yoga with Deborah Bandos
10:15 am
Anagrams with Malka Zweig
10:30 am
Bais Yaakov Middle School Visit
11:00 am
Discussion Group with Rabbi Karp
1:00 pm
Arts & Crafts with Shifra
1:45 pm
Guitar with Yossi K
Thursday December 12th
9:30 am
Yoga with Deborah Bandos
10:15 am
Anagrams with Malka Zweig
11:00 am
Discussion Group with Rabbi Karp
1:00 pm
Arts & Crafts with Shifra
1:45 pm
Guitar with Yossi K
Friday December 13th
9:30 am
Q and A with Nurse Shaindel
10:00 am
Baking with Ms. Hirschman
11:00 am
Discussion Group with Rabbi Karp
2:00 pm
Music with Aharon Grayson
LANDAU
Kulam Partners With Chaverim Of Greater Washington To Teach Yeshiva Boys Tire Changing Skills
This past week, Kulam, a youth organization dedicated to providing boys in yeshiva with healthy outlets outside of school hours, teamed up with Chaverim of Greater Washington for a hands-on learning experience. The collaboration focused on teaching the boys an essential life skill: how to change a flat tire.
Members of Chaverim, known for their community service and emergency response work, demonstrated the different tools used to change a tire and provided step-bystep instructions. The boys were then given the opportunity to try it themselves, practicing their newfound skills under the guidance of the experts.
“We are so grateful for this partnership with Chaverim,” said Abba Florans, Executive Director
of Kulam. “Not only did the boys learn something practical, but the experience also helped build their confidence. By learning a useful life skill, they are better equipped to handle challenges and feel more self-assured.”
Kulam also extends a heartfelt thank you to Chabad of Silver Spring for generously allowing this event to be held in their space. Without their support, this handson experience would not have been possible.
Kulam hopes to continue collaborating with Chaverim and other community organizations to offer more opportunities for the boys to develop practical life skills. Kulam believes teaching our boys these hands-on skills is crucial for their growth. It’s about more than just knowing how to change a tire—it’s about building
confidence and helping them feel good about themselves.
Both Kulam and Chaverim are excited about future collaborations, aiming to provide the boys with more valuable life lessons in the coming months.
November 1 st - January 15 th
Beyond the Headlines
A weekly glimpse into the Israel you won’t read about in the news
By Sivan Rahav Meir
Everything They Taught Us in Kindergarten Is Still True
We are now in the Hebrew month of Kislev, with the light-filled holiday of Chanukah soon approaching. Did you learn about Kislev and Chanukah in kindergarten? Because everything we learned then still holds true today! Here are a few points:
• Kislev is a month in which the light defeated the darkness.
• It is a month that highlights the struggle between the forces of good and evil. The side that will ultimately emerge victorious is not the stronger one, but the one that represents the truth. All our enemies will soon find themselves in the “dustbin of history.”
• Kislev is a month of military as well as spiritual strength.
• There are times when we need to maintain our courage over an extended period, making it difficult to keep up the momentum. But the month of Kislev reminds us that we must continually grow as we move forward. In Hebrew, this is called “mosif v’holeich,” referring to the fact that each day of Chanukah, we add another candle until the entire menorah shines with all eight Chanukah candles. Nevertheless, each day has its own light. Similarly, if we manage to carry on our daily routine during these challenging days, we will see success in each day.
• Finally, this is a month of miracles, prayers, and salvation. History has taught us that anything can happen, and we can be surprised by something good we never anticipated. A small container of oil miraculously provided enough oil for eight days, and in the end, the light was greater than we could have ever imagined.
May we see the miracles of those days recurring in our times, God willing, very soon.
Higher!
Sheryl Sandberg addressed the Jewish leaders gathered at the General
Assembly in Washington, DC, with a simple yet profound experiment. “Everyone, raise your hand as high as you can,” she instructed.
As the audience complied, she added, “Now, raise it an inch higher.” Remarkably, each person managed to lift their hand even further. “See that?” she said. “When we think we’ve done all we can, we realize we can do more—and we do. And we have!”
Sandberg’s message reflects the resilience and determination unfolding among Jews worldwide in the wake of recent tragedies. This collective awakening has even been given a name: “The Jews of October 8th”—those who rose anew the day after.
A billionaire and former COO of Meta, Sandberg also spearheaded the production of Screams Before Silence, a film documenting Hamas’ atrocities against women on October 7th. On stage, she described her shock at the lack of response from women’s organizations and the global community. “The silence was deafening,” she said on stage. “All the work we did together for years for women, it was as if none of that had ever happened.”
The events of that Simchat Torah fundamentally changed her, but in a profoundly positive way. “In the past, people would ask me: Are you a Jewish-American or an American-Jew? Which part of your identity comes first? Since October 7th, I sit here as a different person. Today, being Jewish is as central to my identity as anything else. I sit here as a proud Zionist and a proud Jew, in a way I couldn’t have imagined a year and a half ago.”
Sandberg urged the audience to focus not solely on antisemitism or anti-Israel sentiment, but on the strength and beauty of Jewish identity. Quoting journalist Bari Weiss, she emphasized: “Our identity as Jews has to be more rooted in Sinai than in Auschwitz. That’s true, because being Jewish is a wonderful thing—a tradition of charity, of caring for others, of knowledge, of study, of family, and of community.”
She shared a personal story: “Last January, I asked my daughter what she wanted for her birthday. She wasn’t
particularly affiliated but she said she wanted a Jewish Star, and she’s worn it every day since then. So have I, and so have my two other daughters. My middle daughter is president of the Jewish affinity club in her school. She wasn’t a member a year and a half ago! I am born again, and that has had some beautiful moments. I am part of this community in a different way.”
Will October 7th be remembered not only as a day of unspeakable tragedy but also as a turning point—a day of global Jewish awakening? Can we all raise our hands just a little higher? Thank you, Sheryl, for inspiring us to try.
Bringing Torah to Bezalel
Last week I received a message about a hachnasat sefer Torah that took place at the Bezalel Academy of Arts and Design. This was a notable occasion, since it was the first sefer Torah ever brought to this prestigious college. Established back in 1906, Bezalel once prided itself on its left-leaning, anti-religious agenda. Today, that is slowly changing.
The new sefer Torah represented a joint effort: The parochet was designed by Bezalel students; the Torah mantle was donated by the family of fallen soldier St. Sgt. Shilo Amir; and the sefer Torah itself was a gift from Chabad on Campus. This particular scroll was restored after being damaged during the Simchat Torah massacre in one of the Gaza border communities.
“In a beautiful moment of unity, we all came together to write the final letters of the sefer Torah,” wrote the Bezalel student. “It’s fitting that Bezalel, the academy’s namesake, was the artisan who built the Mishkan for Bnei Yisrael in the desert.”
The Woman’s Role
This week’s parasha contains one of the most difficult verses in the Torah. During her painful years of being childless, Rachel lashes out at Yaakov: “Give me children, and if not, I am dead.”
Commentators have given various explanations for this emotionally charged exchange between Rachel and Yaakov. Six hundred years ago, Spanish Rabbi Isaac Arama wrote that every woman has two purposes in life. The first is to give birth to and bring up children and the other is “to be educated in wisdom and piety.” Rabbi Arama wrote that Rachel’s words were misplaced because she only focused on one of her missions but ignored the second one: to study and become educated, to learn Torah and do good deeds. That is also an integral part of a woman’s mission.
Professor Nechama Leibowitz quotes Rabbi Arama’s explanation in her books and explains how fundamentally important it is. She writes that Rachel is fleeing from fulfilling part of her mission; Rachel did not understand that she had additional functions in life beyond giving birth. Later in the parasha, we are told that Rachel gave birth to Joseph and then to Benjamin.
We can only contemplate what Professor Leibowitz herself thought of what she had written. She was highly successful in being “educated in wisdom and piety” but never merited to give birth.
Translated by Yehoshua Siskin, Janine Muller Sherr
Want to read more by Sivan Rahav Meir? Google The Daily Thought or visit sivanrahavmeir.com
The Week In News
The Week In News
China Releases 3
U.S. Prisoners
Last week, China freed three American prisoners and the United States released four individuals to China.
China, in its statement on Thursday, said that three of the Chinese citizens released by the U.S. had been imprisoned for “political purposes.” The fourth individual, Beijing added, was a U.S. resident wanted by China for crimes. Those released from the U.S. were not named, while the prisoners freed by China were identified as Mark Swidan, Kai Li, and John Leung.
Swidan, Li, and Leung were, according to the U.S., wrongfully detained, with Li and Leung facing espionage charges and Swidan facing a death sentence for allegations of drug use. The three re-
turned to the United States late Wednesday night, having been brought by plane to a military base in San Antonio, Texas.
Just two months ago, China also released Californian pastor David Lin, whom Beijing imprisoned for twenty years for contract fraud.
On Thursday, President Joe Biden said he talked with the three men and was “really happy they are home.” Their release was also praised by lawmakers on both sides of the political spectrum, including by Republican Texas Sen. Ted Cruz, whose state is home to Swidan’s mother. Cruz attributed their release to senior Biden administration official’s efforts.
Chuck Schumer, the Democratic Senate Majority Leader, was particularly invested in freeing Li, a Chinese immigrant and businessman living in New York who was arrested in September 2016 during a
trip to Shanghai. China accused Li of giving state secrets to the FBI and sentenced him to ten years in prison, a decision that his family called politically motivated.
Last year, China accused Leung of spying after arresting him in 2021. His arrest prompted the United States to put into effect a level three travel warning against U.S. citizens traveling to China due to the “risk of wrongful detention.”
On the day of the three men’s release, the U.S. lowered the travel warning to level two, declaring that Americans should still “exercise increased caution” in China because the government “arbitrarily enforces local laws, including exit bans on U.S. citizens and citizens of other countries, without fair and transparent process under the law.”
Nazi Guard to Face Trial
Gregor Formanek, 100, is being accused of aiding and abetting the murder of 3,300 people while working as a guard at the
Sachsenhausen concentration camp, near Berlin, during World War II. Now, Formanek will be facing justice.
Earlier this year, a German regional court suspended the proceedings against the Nazi guard due to a “permanent inability to stand trial.”
This week, a higher court overruled the ruling, which opens the door to a trial in the near future.
Formanek is suspected of playing a role in the “cruel and insidious” murder of thousands of prisoners at Sachsenhausen between July 1943 and February 1945.
A later document drawn up by the East German Stasi secret police notes that Formanek, who was a teenager at the time of the alleged offenses, “continually killed prisoners.”
Greater Washington Weekday Minyanim Guide
6:15 am Young Israel Shomrai Emunah M-F
6:25 am Southeast Hebrew Cong., Knesset Yehoshua M-F
6:30 am Beth Sholom Congregation M-F
Beit Halevi (Sfardi) M, T
Chabad of Silver Spring M-F
Ohev Shalom Talmud Torah OLNEY M-F
Young Israel Shomrai Emunah S YGW M, Th
6:35 am Ohr Hatorah M, Th
6:40 am YGW S, T, W, F
Magen David Sephardic Congregation M-Th
6:45 am Beit Halevi (Sfardi) S, T, W, F
Kemp Mill Synagogue M, Th
Ohr Hatorah T, W, F
Young Israel Shomrai Emunah M, Th
6:50 am Woodside Synagogue/Ahavas Torah M, Th Silver Spring Jewish Center M-F
Chabad of Upper Montgomery County M-F
6:55 am Young Israel Shomrai Emunah T, W, F
7:00 am Kemp Mill Synagogue T, W, F
Southeast Hebrew Cong., Knesset Yehoshua S Silver Spring Jewish Center S
Woodside Synagogue/Ahavas Torah T, W, F
Young Israel Ezras Israel of Potomac T,W,F
7:05 am Kesher Israel M, Th
7:15 am Kemp Mill Synagogue M, Th Kesher Israel T, W, F
Ohev Sholom Talmud Torah/The National Synagogue M-F
Ohr Hatorah S
7:30 am Chabad of DC M-F
Chabad of Potomac M-F
JROC M-F
Kemp Mill Synagogue T, W, F
Southeast Hebrew Cong., Knesset Yehoshua M-F
Young Israel Shomrai Emunah S Young Israel Shomrai Emunah (Sfardi) M-F
7:45 am YGW (Yeshiva Session Only) S-F
8:00 am Beth Sholom Congregation S
Kemp Mill Synagogue S Kesher Israel S
Ohev Shalom Talmud Torah OLNEY S
Southeast Hebrew Cong., Knesset Yehoshua S
8:00 am Chabad of Upper Montgomery County S
Woodside Synagogue/Ahavas Torah S YGW (High School; School-Contingent) S-F
Young Israel Ezras Israel of Potomac S Young Israel Shomrai Emunah (Sfardi) S
8:15 am Ohr Hatorah S Kehilat Pardes / Berman Hebrew Academy S-F
Silver Spring Jewish Center M-F
8:30 am Chabad of DC S Chabad of Potomac S JROC S Ohev Sholom Talmud Torah/The National Synagogue S
Silver Spring Jewish Center S YGW (Summer Only) S-F
8:45 am Young Israel Shomrai Emunah S-F
9:00 am Chabad of Silver Spring S Kemp Mill Synagogue S
mincha
12:30 pm YGW Sunday
1:00 pm Silver Spring Jewish Center M-F
1:10 pm YGW M-Th
3:00 pm YGW Middle School School Days
mincha/maariv
Before Shkiah (15-18 minutes), S-TH
Beit Halevi (Sfardi)
Beth Sholom Congregation
Chabad of Potomac
Chabad of Silver Spring
Chabad of Upper Montgomery County
JROC
Kemp Mill Synagogue
Kesher Israel
Magen David Sephardic Congregation
Ohev Sholom Talmud Torah/The National Synagogue Ohr Hatorah
Formanek was charged in August 2023 when he was 98 years old.
Since 2011, Germany has been prosecuting ex-Nazis for crimes they committed decades ago, with prosecutors racing against time to secure convictions before the defendants die of old age.
Sachsenhausen was used by the Nazis to imprison political prisoners, Jews, Soviet soldiers, gypsies and Roma people. Tens of thousands of people were murdered by the SS, either by execution, forced labor, starvation or medical experiments.
It would not be the first time a centenarian former Nazi is put on trial in Germany. In 2022, Josef Schütz, then 101, was found guilty of complicity in mass murder at Sachsenhausen. Though he was given a five-year prison sentence, he appealed against the verdict and died in April 2023 without spending time behind bars.
Oskar Gröning, the so-called bookkeeper of Auschwitz, also escaped jail time as he filed a series of appeals and then died in 2018 while they were still being processed by the courts.
Vietnam: Pay or Go to Jail
Real estate tycoon Truong My Lan was convicted in Vietnam in April of embezzlement and bribery amounting to $12.5 billion, equivalent to 3% of the country’s GDP. She had been the chairperson of the Van Thinh Phat real estate firm and illegally controlled Saigon Joint Stock Commercial Bank between 2012 and 2022, allowing 2,500 loans that cost the bank $27 billion in losses. Lan was sentenced to death for her crimes.
This week, a court upheld the death sentence but said it could be commuted to life in jail if she reimburses around $11 billion, or three-fourths of what she defrauded in the country’s biggest financial crime.
Lan’s lawyers argued that she had repaid the money but the court disagreed since there were legal issues with some of the seized properties and prosecuting agencies couldn’t assess their value.
Lan’s lawyers also noted several mitigating circumstances — she had admitted guilt, showed remorse and had paid back part of the amount.
“I feel pained due to the waste of national resources,” she said last week, according to state media.
But the court noted that Lan’s actions were not just personal. The fraud had negatively impacted banking, caused public disorder and eroded people’s trust.
Lan’s arrest was among the most high-profile in an anti-corruption drive in Vietnam that intensified after 2022. The so-called Blazing Furnace campaign touched the highest echelons of Vietnamese politics.
Lan, 67, and her family had set up the Van Thing Phat company in 1992.
The company grew into one of Vietnam’s richest real estate firms, with luxury residential buildings, offices, hotels and shopping centers. This made her a key player in the country’s financial industry.
The scale of Lan’s crime meant the case was split into two trials, and Lan was sentenced to another life sentence in October. At that trial, she was accused of raising $1.2 billion from nearly 36,000 investors by issuing bonds illegally through four companies, state media reported. She was also found guilty of siphoning off $18 billion obtained through fraud and for using companies controlled by her to illegally transfer more than $4.5 billion in and out of Vietnam between 2012 and 2022.
Trump’s Senior Advisor on Arab Affairs
Donald Trump, the former and now-incoming president, selected his senior advisor on Arab and Middle
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Eastern affairs on Sunday. His choice was the father-in-law of Trump’s daughter Tiffany, Massad Boulos.
In Trump’s future administration, Boulos is expected to work closely with Arab countries, while Trump’s special envoy for the Middle East, Steve Witkoff, will likely focus on Israeli affairs. Trump’s Middle East priorities include ending the wars and expanding the Abraham Accords, an agreement that normalized relations between Israel and the United Arab Emirates, Bahrain, and Morocco.
Boulos played a major role in boosting Trump’s appeal among Arab and Muslim Americans, thus helping the president-elect win Michigan, a state that voted for President Joe Biden in 2020.
Boulos has also been a channel between Trump and Mahmoud Abbas, the president of the Palestinian Authority. Boulos transmitted a letter from Abbas to Trump, in which the Palestinian leader condemned the assassination attempt against Trump in Butler, Pennsylvania. In September, Boulos met with Abbas in person on the sidelines of the U.N. General Assembly. And in November, he organized a phone call between Abbas and Trump – their first call in seven years.
Boulos is a “highly respected leader in the business world, with extensive experience on the international scene,” declared Trump on Truth Social.
“He has been a longtime proponent of Republican and Conservative values, an asset to my Campaign, and was instrumental in building tremendous new coalitions with the Arab American Community,” Trump added. “Massad is a dealmaker and an unwavering supporter of PEACE in the Middle East.”
Boulos was born in Lebanon and has ties both to allies and enemies of Hezbollah. As a teenager, he immigrated to the United States, where he attended the University of Houston. He became a lawyer and, eventually, a billionaire with major business dealings in Nigeria.
Recently, Trump picked another one of his children’s in-laws to serve in his administration. The president-elect
selected Charles Kushner, the father of Jared Kushner, Trump’s son-in-law, to be the U.S. ambassador to France.
Terror Attack Near Ariel
On Friday, a Hamas terrorist shot at a civilian bus in Gitai Avisar Junction, which is near Ariel, a village in Judea and Samaria, injuring eight or more people.
Three people sustained serious injuries, including Hassan Elsachen, the bus driver. One was moderately wounded. Four people sustained light injuries after being hit by broken glass, according to the Magen David Adom ambulance service. Of those injured, four were soldiers.
The attack was claimed by Hamas’ military wing, the Al-Qassam Brigades, who identified the terrorist as Samir Muhammad Ahmad Hussein, a 46-year-old Einabus resident who was one of the Brigades’ members. Security forces shot Hussein dead at the scene of the crime.
The Israel Defense Forces suspect that a third party provided the terrorist with the M-16 assault rifle and car that he used. However, the IDF does not believe that there was a second terrorist involved since no one was found after the military scanned the area.
Initial investigations into the attack indicate that Hussein arrived from Nablus, driving through Tapuah Junction to Gitai Avisar, where there are no internal checkpoints. Around 150 meters away from a bus stop, Hussein parked his vehicle. As he walked towards the bus, he began shooting with his assault rifle. He was quickly eliminated by nearby IDF troops.
Since the October 7 massacre, when Hamas invaded southern Israel, murdering 1,200 Israelis and kidnapping 251 others, Judea and Samaria has seen a significant rise in violence.
Cpt. Omer Neutra, HY”D:
On Monday, the Israel Defense Forces confirmed the death of Cpt. Omer Maxim Neutra, a soldier who was among the 251 people kidnapped during the October 7 massacre. Until now, authorities believed that Neutra was alive in Gaza.
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Neutra, 21, was the tank platoon commander in the 7th Armored Brigade’s 77th Battalion. When Hamas stormed southern Israel, he was stationed near Kibbutz Nahal Oz in a tank on the border. After getting attacked by terrorists with explosives and RPG fire, he, along with Sgt. Shaked Dahan, the driver, Sgt. Nimrod Cohen, the gunner, and Sgt. Oz Daniel, the loader, was kidnapped.
In November 2023, Israel confirmed Dahan’s death. Daniel’s death was confirmed in February. And now, the Military Rabbinate has declared Neutra’s death based on findings and new intelligence information. It is unclear whether Cohen is still alive. However, Cohen’s father said on Monday, “We have received indications that Nimrod is alive. I am sure my son is alive, and I am fighting.”
A sports fanatic who headed his
high school’s basketball, volleyball, and soccer teams, Neutra grew up in Long Island, New York. Though he initially planned to attend Binghamton University, he decided to spend a gap year in Israel in 2020, after which he elected to join the IDF. His parents last spoke to him on October 6, 2023.
On Monday afternoon, Omer’s family released a statement: “Over the past 423 days – nearly 14 months –we have been working non-stop doing anything and everything possible to bring Omer home alive. It was an unimaginable nightmare to be acting based on the hope that he was alive, despite having little information or signs of life since he was seen on video being taken on October 7.”
Omer’s parents, Orna and Ronen, said their beloved son was a natural leader “who made others around him better with his warmth and ability to engage and encourage others to be their best.”
They added, “The grief is heavy. Sadly, time has run out to bring Omer home alive and words alone have no power to comfort.”
Leadership will only be revealed in actions and results going forward, the
Neutras wrote.
“We call upon the Israeli government to work with President Biden and President-elect Trump, to use all of their leverage and resources to return all 101 hostages — living and the deceased — to their families as soon as possible.”
Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu sent his condolences to Neutra’s family, promising to recover his remains for burial in Israel.
“Omer was a man of values, blessed with talents and a Zionist in every sense of the word,” said the premier. “He immigrated to Israel to enlist in the IDF, chose a combat path and was chosen to command and lead.
“[Israel] will not rest or be silent until we return him home for a Jewish burial, and we will continue to act resolutely and tirelessly until we return all of our hostages,” Netanyahu added.
Omer’s parents, Orna and Ronen, spoke about their son at the Republican National Convention a few months ago, urging the U.S. and Israel to work tirelessly for the safe release of their son and the other hostages.
In a statement responding to the
news, President Joe Biden said he was “devastated and outraged.”
“A Long Island native, Omer planned to return to the United States for college. He dreamed of dedicating himself to building peace,” the president said.
He recalled meeting Omer’s parents last month at the White House where they again shared their story. “They told me how Omer’s grandparents were Holocaust survivors and how their family’s strength and resilience has been carried through the generations,” Biden said.
“To all the families of those still held hostage: We see you. We are with you. And I will not stop working to bring your loved ones back home where they belong,” Biden pledged.
On October 7, 2023, 251 people were kidnapped by Hamas and brought into Gaza. Now, 97 remain in Gaza, 35 of whom are believed to have died in captivity. There are three Americans who are still being held hostage who are believed to be alive: Edan Alexander, Sagui Dekel-Chen and Keith Siegel. The bodies of four other Americans — Omer, Judith Weinstein, Gadi Haggai and Itay Chen — are still being held in Gaza.
AYESHA FASHION
HONG KONG
TAILOR
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Trump: Release the Hostages
This week, President-elect Donald Trump threatened those holding hostages in the Middle East with unprecedented American firepower if they are not released by the time he enters office on January 20.
“Everybody is talking about the hostages who are being held so violently, inhumanely, and against the will of the entire World, in the Middle East – But it’s all talk and no action!” Trump wrote on Truth Social.
He added, “Please let this TRUTH serve to represent that if the hostages are not released prior to January 20, 2025, the date that I proudly assume Office as President of the United States, there will be ALL [HECK] TO PAY in the Middle East, and for those in charge who perpetrated these atrocities against Humanity,” he continued.
“Those responsible will be hit harder than anybody has been hit in the long and storied History of the United States of America. RELEASE THE HOSTAGES NOW!” Trump added.
The post was made just two days after Hamas released a propaganda video showing American-Israeli Edan Alexander pleading to be released. It was also made just hours after the IDF announced that American-Israeli Omer Neutra – who had been believed to have been alive and had been held hostage for over a year – had died on October 7, 2023. His body is being held by terrorists in Gaza.
Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s wife Sara said she raised the plight of the hostages during her dinner on Sunday night with Trump at the president-elect’s golf resort in Florida.
Supposedly, the Biden administration
is still working to secure a deal before January 20. U.S. President Joe Biden met with the families of the remaining American hostages last month in the Oval Office.
“I don’t care if Trump gets all the credit as long as they come back home,” Biden told the families during the meeting, according to one of the family members in the room.
After securing a ceasefire between Israel and Hezbollah last week, Biden said he would launch another effort to secure a similar deal in Gaza, by leaning on Turkey, Qatar, and Egypt, which all have ties with Hamas, in order to lean on the terror group to agree to a deal.
National Security Advisor John Kirby said during a Monday press briefing that Hamas remains “the main stumbling block.”
But Arab mediators insist that Netanyahu has been holding up talks.
The family of Omer Neutra, the American-Israeli hostage whose death was announced by Israel on Monday, said words alone would not bring them comfort and called on the leaders of Israel and the United States to act to bring home the remaining hostages.
“In the 423 days since October 7, we expected our leaders to demonstrate the same courage displayed so bravely by Omer and rise to the occasion on behalf of those who were killed and kidnapped, just as our beloved Omer showed until the very end,” Omer’s parents Ronen and Orna and brother Daniel said in a joint statement, expressing their gratitude for the support they have received around the world during their struggle.
“Sadly, time has run out to bring Omer home alive and words alone have no power to comfort. Leadership will only be revealed in actions and results going forward. We call upon the Israeli government to work with President Biden and President-elect Trump, to
Sitting Pretty
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use all of their leverage and resources to return all 101 hostages — living and the deceased — to their families as soon as possible,” they added.
Edan Alexander, Sagui Dekel-Chen and Keith Siegel are the last remaining American hostages believed to still be alive. The bodies of four other Americans — Omer, Judith Weinstein, Gadi Haggai and Itay Chen — are still being held in Gaza.
Israel Builds Bases in Gaza
The Israeli military has been expanding its presence in the central Gaza
and satellite images, a move that suggests it may be preparing to exert long-term control over the area.
Since the early months of the war in Gaza, Israeli forces have occupied a 4-mile road, known as the Netzarim corridor, that bisects the enclave, to keep hundreds of thousands of displaced Palestinians in Gaza from returning north. That has slowly grown into an 18-square-mile block of territory controlled by Israeli forces, according to the Israeli military and a New York Times analysis of satellite images and video footage.
Over the past three months, soldiers have demolished more than 600 buildings around the road in an apparent attempt to create a buffer zone. They have also rapidly expanded a network of outposts equipped with communications towers and defensive fortifications.
The buildup suggests a shift for Israel, which had largely avoided holding territory in Gaza, creating a vacuum that has allowed Hamas to reassert control in some parts of Gaza. The military said the expansion was for operational reasons.
the ability to regulate travel across the length of the enclave, keeping hundreds of thousands of displaced Palestinians in the south. In recent months, the Israeli military has extended its power over territory on either side of the corridor, roughly 4.3 miles wide and 4.3 miles long, to make it easier for Israeli forces to hold onto the area, Lt. Col. Nadav Shoshani, an Israeli military spokesperson, said in an interview.
Israel captured and occupied Gaza in the 1967 Arab-Israeli war, maintaining Jewish settlements and military bases there. The country withdrew from the area in 2005.
Some Israeli ministers have said the military control in Gaza should pave the way for renewed Jewish settlement, although Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu of Israel has ruled that out for now. The former Israeli settlement of Netzarim — for which the military corridor is named — lies within the area now fully under Israeli control.
Driving in one of the hottest places on Earth can be quite dangerous. Last week, a truck carrying 44,000 pounds of dried chickpeas “burned up” after illegally driving through Death Valley National Park. It was the seventh vehicle fire in the California national park this year.
The tractor-trailer’s brakes overheated while it was descending on a road that is closed to commercial truck traffic. The driver was able to pull over on flat terrain and was unharmed.
“When a commercial truck has a wreck or catches on fire, we worry about what it will release into the park,” Superintendent Mike Reynolds said in a news release. “However, there’s very little chance that stray chickpeas not cleaned up will become invasive species in the driest place in North America.”
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Vehicle fires have become an increasingly common occurrence at the hottest place on Earth, most of which are caused by the same issue that plagued a truck last month. Brakes can quickly burn up going down steep grades, Abby Wines, a spokesperson for the park, noting that Death Valley has seen more vehicles impacted this year in comparison to previous years.
The national park broke all-time temperature records in July; that same month, a truck was completely destroyed in a brake fire as it descended Towne Pass. Another vehicle caught fire at Dantes View a week later. Wines called the fire at Dantes View “an unusual one” because the car was at the top of the mountain and caught fire due to an unknown cause, not overheating brakes.
From August 8 to August 11, temperatures at the park’s Furnace Creek did not fall below the triple-digit mark. A travel trailer burned to the ground on the last day of the heat wave, and four days later, a soft drink truck was engulfed in flames near Mesquite Flat Sand Dunes. It’s not just high temperatures that can cause fires there. The weather on November 21 – the day the truck filled with chickpeas caught fire – was just hovering around 75 degrees.
Trudeau Meets with Trump
Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau met with President-elect Donald Trump at Mar-a-Lago on Friday. The Canadian leader requested the meeting, hoping to avoid tariffs on his country that Trump had proposed.
Last week, Trump had threatened to impose major tariffs on products coming from Canada and Mexico if the countries do not help to stem the flow of illegal immigrants and drugs into the U.S. He said on social media last week that he would impose a 25% tax on all products entering the U.S. from Canada and Mexico as one of his first executive orders.
Trudeau had hoped to impress upon Trump that the Canadian border is different from the southern border.
Canadian Public Safety Minister Dominic LeBlanc, whose responsibilities include border security, attended a dinner with Trump and Trudeau.
“The prime minister of course spoke about the importance of protecting the Canadian economy and Canadian workers from tariffs, but we also discussed with our American friends the negative impact that
those tariffs could have on their economy, on affordability in the United States as well,” LeBlanc said in Parliament.
Canada is already examining possible retaliatory tariffs on certain items from the U.S. should Trump follow through on the threat.
Trump called his talks with Trudeau “productive” but did not back down from his pledge.
“The idea that we came back empty handed is completely false,” LeBlanc added.
“We had a very productive discussion with Mr. Trump and his future Cabinet secretaries. ... The commitment from Mr. Trump to continue to work with us was far from empty handed.”
Joining Trump and Trudeau at dinner were Howard Lutnick, Trump’s nominee for commerce secretary, North Dakota Gov. Doug Burgum, Trump’s pick to lead the Interior Department, and Mike Waltz, Trump’s choice to be his national security adviser.
Canada’s ambassador to the U.S., Kirsten Hillman, said that “the message that our border is so vastly different than the Mexican border was really understood.” Hillman, who sat at an adjacent table to Trudeau and Trump, said Canada is not the problem when it comes to drugs and migrants.
On Monday, Mexico’s president rejected those comments.
“Mexico must be respected, especially
by its trading partners,” President Claudia Sheinbaum said. She said Canada had its own problems with fentanyl consumption and “could only wish they had the cultural riches Mexico has.”
Flows of migrants and seizures of drugs at the two countries’ border are vastly different. U.S. customs agents seized 43 pounds of fentanyl at the Canadian border during the last fiscal year, compared with 21,100 pounds at the Mexican border. Most of the fentanyl reaching the U.S. — where it causes about 70,000 overdose deaths annually — is made by Mexican drug cartels using precursor chemicals smuggled from Asia.
On immigration, the U.S. Border Patrol reported 1.53 million encounters with migrants at the southwest border with Mexico between October 2023 and September 2024. That compares to 23,721 encounters at the Canadian border during that time.
Canada is the top export destination for 36 U.S. states. Nearly $3.6 billion Canadian (US$2.7 billion) worth of goods and services cross the border each day. About 60% of U.S. crude oil imports are from Canada, and 85% of U.S. electricity imports as well.
Canada is also the largest foreign supplier of steel, aluminum and uranium to the U.S. and has 34 critical minerals and metals that the Pentagon is eager for and investing for national security.
Torah Thought Like A Man Whose Mother Consoles So I Will Console You
By Rabbi Zvi Teichman
As I commemorate the fourth yahrtzeit of my dear mother, I would like to share an exquisite handwritten document we found among her papers that she evidently penned many years ago. It is entitled ‘The Prayer of the Mother of a Ben Torah’. As a mother of five sons, but no daughters, she articulated in her inimitable way her hopes for the daughters-inlaw she would merit.
My mother who lived to the ripe old age of ninety-six, adored my weekly divrei Torah, as only a mother can, reading and comment-
“G-d, grant my son all the brachos of the Torah.
Long life, good health, wisdom, respect for his parents, and favor in the eyes of his fellow men - with all these please endow him.
But - above all, bless him with a good wife!
How shall her virtues be measured?
Beauty? She need not be “fashion model” beautiful, but only possessed of sufficient attractiveness to find appeal mainly in his eyes. May her goodness shine from her eyes and illuminate her
often “wears” one’s attractiveness. Sarah was truly stunning, but it reflected a beauty that radiated an inner purity and absolute innocence, like that wholesome charm of a pretty child.
Avraham viewed Sarah for who she was, an exquisitely spiritual woman who transmitted and inspired greatness of the spirit. He never saw anything one-dimensional and merely physical.
Intellect? May she have training in limudei kodesh, only not simply a mastery of a body of knowledge but an intense understanding of the basic purpose for which Hashem created her as delineated by our Chachomim. May she have learned enough to appreciate the great zchus of being the helpmate of a ben Torah, and the difficult but eminently worthwhile life she must accept, wherever she and her husband are destined to live.
One must first prove how determined one is to reach their spiritual goals by enduring the physical challenges that seek to quash our determination and defeat our ambitions.
Rachel had to first submit her maidservant to beget children from Yaakov. Only one who is motivated by the selfless goal of bringing the Tribes of Israel into existence, not simply stemming from the natural maternal instinct every female has, even among the strata of animal, would be able to withstand not becoming deflated or deterred when seeing their maidservant be privileged, rather than they themselves, mothering those children.
When one is willing to sacrifice one’s own personal aspirations for
the greater ‘Honor of Heaven’ that is when G-d situates Himself on the throne of compassion, permitting His beloved Rachel to defy the laws of nature in meriting to bear a child, as indeed she went on to mother, both Yosef and Binyomin.
Friends? May she be able to befriend all varieties of people and find zechusim in them rather than faults. May her standards for friends be based on the same traditional qualities with which our Imahos were judged - Generosity, tact, and the ability to place the needs of others before their own. May she not repulse them with excessive self-consciousness and or unwarranted fear of rejection.
In a departure from other commentaries, Rav Samson Raphael Hirsch offers a remarkable and innovative understanding of the events that transpired in the dudaim/flower exchange between Leah and Rachel:
Rather, the whole matter appears as an instance to show a state of the two sisters living together in the most confidential intimacy. While Yaakov is out in the fields the two wives sit together. His evenings he spends alternatively with each one of them. Reuvein, who was still a boy, brings some wildflowers home to his mother. “Give me some of them”, says Rachel. “What audacity to ask for my precious flowers, etc.” says Leah jokingly, but of course she gives her some. “Now”, says Rachel, “because you have been so kind, he shall come to you this evening”. (RSRH)
There is no indication Leah initiated a barter as she makes no
evident request. She seems to have given from her flowers before the ‘deal’ is struck, indicating it was the loving sister Rachel who was gladly offering to give the night to her sister.
But what precipitated this new friendship? Wasn’t the undercurrent in the house of Yaakov stormier just a bit earlier?
The Zohar (:דלק ףד תולדות) says the word םיאדוד is rooted in םידוד, friends, perhaps a reference to the alliance between the body and the soul who are dear and loyal friends or to the quality of this fragrant flower that can induce love and camaraderie in others.
So often we get caught up in the struggle for our own definition. Our personal hopes and aspirations cloud our ability to see accurately the master plan of God. We allow ‘our’ expectations to drive our ambitions which so often lead to resentment.
We have to stand back a moment and ‘smell the roses’ reflecting on the larger picture that is being played out.
May she ideally have come from a loving, happy home where all its members were taught to share and give of themselves for the welfare of the others. And toiling that good fortune, may she at least have acquired these qualities from some other source for without this ability, no marriage can prosper, however desperately she desires it.
Devorah, the wet nurse of Rivkah is not initially mentioned by name when she is first referenced as merely ‘her wet nurse’ when Rivkah is dispatched by her family to travel back with Eliezer to meet her mate
Yitzchok, where the verse describes how they escorted Rivkah and התק־ נמ. The Targum Yonoson translates it as אתיגוגדיפ, a pedagogue, she was Rivkah’s teacher. The Targum Yerushalmi interprets it as אתיב רמ, implying a foster-mother. This woman was clearly more than just a provider of physical nourishment. She was the woman who despite the challenges Rivkah faced being raised in a home where the likes of Lavan and Besuel abided and where deceit, dishonesty and selfishness were the currency of their relationships, was nevertheless able
to nurture Rivkah in becoming the epitome of kindness and selflessness and instilling within her remarkable self-confidence so she could buck the tide of corruption that was the credo of this home.
The illustrious Gaon, Rav Simcha Wasserman explained the concept of ‘nursing a child’ which is used throughout the Talmud as a metaphor for teaching Torah. A nursing child must be fed by its mother solely with the child’s need in mind. The mother cannot simply nurse for the sake of disgorging her milk, for then the child may choke. Neither can a mother squander her milk, withholding it from the hungry child.
This is true in all facets of raising healthy children, we must be selflessly attuned to their needs, not too much nor too little, each child with its unique requirements. Exaggerated praise or insufficient encouragement will stifle the development of a healthy sense of self.
Rivkah exhibited both confident courage and absolute humility throughout her life. She stood up
to her conniving brother Lavan asserting unequivocally her intent to leave with Eliezer. Upon sensing the greatness of Yitzchok, she falls off her camel donning a veil in submission to his spiritual stature. She can shoulder the responsibility in encouraging Yaakov not to fear snatching the blessings from Esav.
Devorah the ultimate ‘wet nurse’, implemented this strategy of ‘nursing’ in all aspects of Rivka’s emotional and character development, enabling her to become the matriarch she was and remains for eternity.
May her concept of ‘love’ not be based only on a reflection of herself in her husband’s eyes but on a willingness to enhance his image in Klall Yisrael, just as Rachel, the wife of Rabbi Akiva, did for her husband.
You may reach the author at: Ravzt@ ohelmoshebaltimore.com
PARSHA
OVERVIEW
Yaakov leaves Be’er Sheva, and he experiences a vison at Moriah; the ladder dream. Yaakov meets Rachel by the well and removes the heavy rock. Yaakov wants to marry Rachel, and works for seven years for Lavan (her father). Lavan deceives Yaakov, and substitutes Leah for Rachel. Yaakov marries both Rachel and Leah (and Bilha/Zilpah) and the shevatim (tribes) are born. Yaakov builds his family, prospers, and ultimately flees from Lavan.
TSorahparks
Inspiration Everywhere
Pesukim
QUICK VORT
Quotable Quote “ ”
Holiness is the space we make for G-d.
Rabbi Jonathan Sacks zt”l
GEMATRIA
There are 148 pesukim in the Parshah. 148 is the gematria of חמק , which means flour. Our Sages teach us that:
without flour, there is no Torah. One way to understand this is that without “flour” - i.e., parnassah - someone will not be able to learn Torah. Another way to understand this, though, is that Torah is our flour; Torah provides us sustenance.
In our Parshah (see Rashi), we are told that Yaakov studied in the Yeshiva of Shem/Ever for 14 years. Surely, it was these formative years which provided him true sustenance and vitality!
Rabbi Ori Strum is the author of Ready. Set. Grow. (Mosaica Press).
His shiurim and other Jewish content can be found on Torah Anytime and Meaningful Minute. He also likes your feedback: rabbistrumo@gmail.com
There are three symbols of Avodas Hashem (service of the Divine) that were manifested by the three Avos: Avraham, Yitzchak, and Yaakov.
Avraham connected to Hashem through a רה , a mountain. Yitzchak connected to Hashem through a הדש , a field. And Yaakov connected to Hashem through a תיב , a home.
Our Sages tell us that the preferred method for Avodas Hashem is the תיב , a home.
Rav Moshe Shternbuch shlit”a points out an amazing thing. Whereas a mountain is hard to climb and a field can be tough to cross, a home is relatively simple and easy to open up and go inside.
If you think about it, a mountain and a field are things that you can walk on. But only a home, תיב , is something that you can walk inside! In Avodas Hashem, we want to be able to “go inside” and experience Hashem directly!
Have a holy Shabbos!
Yaakov Avinu is blessed תצרפו, which connotes spreading forth without limits.
The Lubavitcher Rebbe says that this ability to break beyond all the physical parameters and constraints is the inheritance of Yaakov Avinu!
Usually, inheritance is limited to whatever physical “items” are being given over. However, imagine being given over a spiritual inheritance that knows no bounds? Yaakov got this type of inheritance.
On some level, each of us - as yiddenalso have this spiritual inheritance!
Think about the Chazal which equates the Avos to a mountain, field, and house.
Why these three things?
What imagery do each of these portray?
What are the pros and cons of each?
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EVENT SCHEDULE
ON YESHIVA CAMPUS
2:30 PM Mincha 2:45 PM
Divrei Pesicha
From Harav Beryl Weisbord, א“טילש, Menahel Ruchani
Followed by Seder and Shiurim from your Rebbeim (Details To Follow) AT THE BALTIMORE MARRIOTT WATERFRONT HOTEL
Many noted the irony. Last Thursday, families throughout the United States sat down together for a family meal to express thanks for all they have. Hours later, they got up and proceeded to shop excessively, buying some items necessary and others less so.
This is the time of year when consumerism is at its highest. My inbox is inundated with sales being announced – all limited time only so I had better rush. The kids are not immune, and they share with each other their latest desired item, all hoping their parents will be in a generous mood.
Our community isn’t exempt, and the kids are making their lists of preferred Chanukah presents. No matter how many times we may remind them, they still fail to fully grasp that gift giving is not a Chanukah chiyuv.
I’m not against taking advantage of the good sales prices. With the many expenses of a frum family, it is wise to purchase needed items when the price is lower. Kids are continuously outgrowing their clothing and destroying their shoes. Household items need replacing, and there is a never-ending “to buy” list for each household. Enjoy the sales and
Parenting Pearls The Season to Shop
By Sara Rayvych, MSEd
ensure your family has all they need. Rather than denounce the steep sales, I wanted to bring up a discussion on some of the ways current consumerism relates to our children.
The Challenge
It’s shocking to hear the ever-increasing list of “needs” today’s child has. Even young children know which companies are status symbols. A simple sweatshirt with the “right” logo can cost tens more than a standard one. One of my older kids remarked, “You can get the same sweatshirt at Store X for much cheaper and better quality.”
I hear the kids listing companies I’ve never heard of. This one makes fancy socks, another the sweatshirt everyone owns, and yet another has the ideal makeup. I don’t think we even heard of these companies five years ago. They are not nicer or better quality. The clothing is only desirable because it carries a particular logo with a matching exorbitant price tag.
The kids must realize what a sickness this is because they will tell you which item has “gone viral.” As kids, we had the “in” thing, but it was never to this degree
or as widespread. With the increase in social media (and all media), children are being continuously influenced. Individuals – often with no qualifications other than popularity – are telling the kids what item they “need” to own. These children then pass on the knowledge to other children they meet. It’s so widespread that even homeschooled children without social media access are aware of the latest fad.
I want to stress that these items are not popular because they’re better quality or function better than the competition. They are desirable simply because the children are led to believe everyone has it.
Gishmei Bracha
On that same day the main shopping frenzy began, there was a major rainstorm. I had just finished working out – contorting my body into painful positions that were probably good for me –when some workout buddies and I looked out the front door. As we saw sheets of drenching rain, we hesitated to leave knowing we’d instantly be thoroughly soaked. Remembering the recent drought warnings, a friend sent up a “thank you” to the Provider of all rain as we took a
moment to appreciate the blessing of water. With that gratitude in our hearts, I hurried out to my van that was parked too far away. It would take hours for my clothing to dry, but it served as a reminder of the bracha we had received.
With so much to be grateful for in our lives, it is truly sad that we miss out on these “small” sources of happiness. We complain about the rain until we have a drought. The weather is too cold, too hot, or too wet. There are so many opportunities to feel gratitude and appreciation in our lives. Taking the time to experience these feelings (and share it with our children, when appropriate) can help pass on this wonderful middah.
Balance
Like most areas of life, balance is important. The question is finding the perfect balance. Sadly, just when you think you found it, something changes. Parenting involves periodically checking in to make sure we are still properly meeting each child’s needs.
It’s unhealthy for children to receive every new shtick. We could make a list of each new thing that has come and gone over the past few years, laughing at the
waves that came and then quickly left. The list of wants just increases, and the same child will soon lose interest and no longer be happy with that once coveted item. As Chazal teaches, one who has one hundred desires two hundred. There is no end to the list of new narishkeit, and it’s not doing a chessed to feed into the insanity.
Additionally, this leads to unfair financial strains on families. With expenses soaring, purchasing luxurious fad items is not within the means for many. The same item can be purchased at a far more reasonable price point from a normal retailer. It’s unreasonable to expect families to pay the extra expense that comes with having “the right” brand name. As more and more children walk around with these expensive items, the pressure increases on more financially challenged families.
For many children, the need to fit in and elevate their status is what pushes them to desire these items. Many of these viral items are plain- or ugly- looking, yet the fame and price tag make the child feel
Despite all the previously mentioned negatives, it’s also unwise to deprive a child. A child that never gets anything may become desperate and hyper-focused on acquiring what they can’t get. Occasionally getting a treat may be helpful in preventing a child from reaching this point.
I want to differentiate between items that are inherently problematic versus those that are simply foolish. There are clothes and other items that are unacceptable to a family’s hashkafic or halachic standards; examples may include shirts with offensive words or that are too tight (for either gender). This is in contrast to something such as a simple sweatshirt that meets all halachic requirements yet is simply overpriced or “branded.” It’s better to “give in” on something that otherwise meets your family’s standards. There are options for parents who would like to allow their child to have some of these items without all the “give me”s; I’d like to include a few of these possibilities. One option is to purchase
Our children need to appreciate who they are and their unlimited worth –regardless of their shoes, bags or socks.
important owning them. Sadly, for many children, the desire behind these items is because of feelings of inferiority.
Our children need to appreciate who they are and their unlimited worth – regardless of their shoes, bags or socks. It takes years to build this feeling of selfworth, and teens – in particular – are known for being focused on fitting in among their peers. Still, this goal should be in our minds.
We also need to help our children appreciate their peers, whether or not they own the latest shtick. Just like our children should never be judged by the brand name of their clothing, our children should learn to be as generous with the kavod of others.
Some of these items are makeup or other items designed to make someone more “attractive.” It’s truly sad that our beautiful youth are struggling to appreciate how their Creator made them. This, too, is a long-term goal that doesn’t emerge immediately, but it still needs to be on our radar.
the item as a birthday (or other occasion) gift. Another idea is to allow the child to pay for it themselves. By saving up and earning towards something special they will naturally have a greater appreciation for it. Children can also earn the item as a prize for accomplishing a special goal. Perhaps the child needs encouragement to attend minyan on time, study a challenging subject, or some other longer term goal. This, too, allows the child to appreciate the item and feel good about owning it.
Ensuring our children have all they need while also meeting their emotional needs is tricky. Educating our children to value both themselves and others takes years of nurturing, but with Hashem’s help will yield beautiful dividends.
Sara Rayvych, MSEd, has her master’s in general and special education. She has been homeschooling for over 10 years in Far Rockaway. She can be contacted at RayvychHomeschool@gmail.com.
camp for Bais Yaakov girls, run by Mechanchos FOR GIRLS GRADES 6TH-10TH
Going on a family vacation is the highlight of my year. I’m not going to honestly say it is a vacation because I work my head off, but I enjoy the special time we spend together for a few days each summer. We rent a house with a lake and enjoy each other’s company.
This year, I had an extra gift from Hshem that actually helped make my vacation an actual vacation. My cell phone didn’t have service at all. The other members of my family had working phones, but mine had not one bar of service and I was completely unreachable. It was amazing. I was completely focused on my family and was able to relax in a way that I usually don’t
have the luxury to do. Now that was a dream vacation.
DID YOU KNOW:
Jewish Streaming Devices, like 24Six and the Zing Player, are now trending in the Jewish market. While these devices do not appear to have internet vulnerabilities, they do require WIFI access periodically to install updates. They also provide an internet-like experience, modeled after apps like Spotify. The audio-only player highlights trending music and popular playlists, while the video capable model has playlist sharing, music videos, and even Jewish podcasts - some inappropriate for children. The devices are constantly updating, so it is unclear what new
features may be introduced in the future. Very different than simple mp3 players, they are much more internet-dependent and engaging, plus their unlimited access to music has led to constant song-hopping and overstimulation. Parents should consider whether these features are a proper fit for their family’s needs.
On the flip side, these devices are a welcome alternative to the
highly objectionable content on Spotify and Apple Music. They offer exclusively Jewish content, and they prevent a child from loading other types of music or videos onto the player.
I GO TO HIGH SCHOOL, JUST LIKE YOU.
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Health & F tness
Foods That Boost Your Immunity for the Winter
By Aliza Beer MS, RD, CDN
As winter settles in, many of us are battling colds, flu, fever, and aches. This demonstrates the importance and crucial need for a strong immune system to fight off the seasonal bugs. How can we keep our immune system strong?
There are many different foods that are rich in specific nutrients that play an important role in immunization. Foods rich in antioxidants, essential vitamins, herbs, and proteins are all great options. Making sure that your diet is properly filled with these options can keep you feeling strong and healthy throughout the chilly season.
Antioxidants
Antioxidants boost your immune system by protecting your cells from damage caused by harmful molecules called free radicals. Free radicals are unstable molecules produced during normal metabolic processes or due to environmental stressors. These molecules can damage cells, proteins, and DNA in a process called oxidative stress, which weakens the immune system. Antioxidants neutralize free radicals, preventing them from causing harm and stabilizing their reactive nature. Antioxidants also keep immune cells healthy and function well, reduce inflammation, and support the repair of damaged tissues. This helps your body fight infections more effectively and stay strong against illnesses.
Including these foods in your winter diet can make a big difference:
• Green Tea: It is packed with catechins, a type of antioxidant known for its disease-fighting properties. Green tea is a comforting winter beverage that can help ward off colds and physically keep you warm!
• Berries: Even in winter, frozen
blueberries, raspberries, and strawberries retain their high levels of antioxidants like anthocyanins. You can sprinkle the frozen berries into your
tem by helping your body produce more white blood cells, which fight infections. It also protects these cells from damage, reduces inflammation, and strength -
Vitamin C boosts your immune system by helping your body produce more white blood cells, which fight infections.
yogurt or oatmeal in the morning or cook them with other fruits to make a delicious compote.
• Dark Chocolate: In moderation, dark chocolate with at least 70% cocoa provides flavonoids, another type of antioxidant that supports immune health.
Vitamin C
Vitamin C boosts your immune sys -
ens your skin, which acts as a barrier against germs.
• Citrus Fruits: Oranges, grapefruits, clementines and lemons are great examples of citrus fruits that are rich in vitamin C.
• Bell Peppers: Surprisingly, red bell peppers contain more vitamin C than oranges and can be roasted or tossed in a salad for flavor and texture.
• Kiwis: These small fruits are packed with vitamin C and are perfect for a refreshing dessert or snack.
Herbs and Spices
Herbs and spices not only add flavor to your meals but also contain compounds that enhance your immune response. They boost your immune system by providing natural compounds that fight inflammation, protect cells from damage, and help your body combat infections.
• Ginger: Ginger is known for its anti-inflammatory and antioxidant properties. It is perfect in teas, soups, or even grated into baked goods.
• Garlic: This herb contains allicin, a compound that boosts the immune system and helps fight off infections. You can easily add it to your soups, poultry, meat, or roasted vegetables.
• Turmeric: This spice, with its active compound curcumin, has powerful anti-inflammatory and immune-enhancing effects. You can use it in soups, on roasted veggies, and hot drinks.
Vitamin E
Vitamin E boosts your immune system primarily because it is a powerful antioxidant that protects cells, including immune cells, from damage caused by free radicals. This protection keeps the immune system functioning effectively. Additionally, vitamin E enhances the activity of T cells, a type of white blood cell that plays a key role in identifying and destroying pathogens. It also helps regulate other immune processes, improving your body’s response to infections. By supporting cell membranes and preventing oxidative stress, vitamin E strengthens your immune defenses, especially in older adults, whose immune systems naturally weaken with age.
• Leafy Greens: Kale, spinach, and Swiss chard are full of vitamins C, A, and E. Use them in hearty soups, stews, or salads.
• Sweet Potato: Sweet potatoes provide moderate amounts of vitamin E alongside beta-carotene (a precursor to vitamin A). The combination of these nutrients offers strong immune support. The vitamin E in sweet potatoes helps protect your cells from oxidative damage, while beta-carotene supports the skin and mucous membranes, your body’s first line of defense against germs.
• Almonds: Besides for the large amount of vitamin E that almonds have, they also contain healthy fats that support the absorption of fat-soluble vitamins, further boosting immunity.
Protein
Protein boosts your immune system by providing the amino acids needed to create immune cells, antibodies, and enzymes that fight infections. It also helps repair tissues and maintain the strength of immune barriers like skin and mucous membranes, keeping your body better protected from germs.
• Lean Meats: Chicken and turkey are rich in protein and zinc, which helps your immune system work efficiently. Chicken soup is a great option that is quite flavored and keeps you hydrated.
• Legumes: Lentils, chickpeas, and beans are excellent plant-based protein sources packed with nutrients like zinc and iron, which support immune health.
• Eggs: High in protein and selenium, eggs can be made in many different forms and are perfect for winter breakfasts.
Fish
Fatty fish contain ample amounts of healthy omega-3 fatty acids, which can enhance immune function. Omega-3s may help to reduce inflammation and could increase your body’s ability to ward off illnesses.
• Salmon: Salmon is rich in omega-3 fatty acids to reduce inflammation and support immune cell function.
• Tuna : Tuna contains vitamin D and selenium, helping regulate immune activity and protect cells.
Meal Suggestions
Breakfast
• Scrambled eggs with sautéed spinach and a side of kiwi slices.
• A bowl of plain Greek yogurt topped with blueberries, slivered al -
monds, and a drizzle of honey with a cup of green tea.
Lunch
• Lentil soup with garlic, turmeric, and ginger, served with a leafy green salad with kale and a citrus vinaigrette.
• Grilled salmon with Brussels sprouts and mashed sweet potatoes sprinkled with fresh parsley.
Dinner
• Grilled chicken and quinoa salad with garlic and olive oil.
• Garlic-onion soup and seared tuna with broccoli and sweet potatoes.
Snacks
• Oranges
• Red bell peppers with hummus
• Cocoa roasted almonds
Chicken Soup
Chicken soup, also known as “Jewish Penicillin,” is a comforting and nutrient-rich remedy often associated with boosting immunity and easing cold or flu symptoms. It helps keep the body hydrated while providing essential nutrients like protein, vitamins, and minerals that support overall health. The soup’s heat can help thin mucus, relieving nasal congestion and promoting easier breathing. Ingredients like chicken and vegetables contribute to the anti-inflammatory properties, which may help alleviate symptoms like a sore throat and reduce inflammation. Chicken also contains cysteine, an amino acid that supports immune function, while the vegetables add antioxidants and immunity-boosting vitamins such as C and A. Beyond its physical benefits, the warmth and flavor of chicken soup provide a sense of comfort, reducing fatigue and promoting recovery during illness.
By focusing on these immunity-boosting foods, you can nourish your body, stay healthy, and strong throughout the winter. Fill your meals with antioxidants, vitamin C, Vitamin E, protein, fish, herbs, and spices. A strong immune system is the best way to approach this season!
Aliza Beer is a registered dietitian with a master’s degree in nutrition. She has a private practice in Cedarhurst, NY. Patients’ success has been featured on the Dr. Oz show. Aliza can be reached at alizabeer@gmail. com, and you can follow her on Instagram at @alizabeer
Chicken Vegetable Soup
Ingredients
• 1 tablespoon extra virgin olive oil
• 1 yellow onion, chopped
• 3 carrots, chopped (about 1 cup)
• 3 celery stalks, chopped (about 1 cup)
• 2 garlic cloves, minced
• 1 teaspoon dried thyme
• 5 cups of water
• 1½ cups fresh or frozen green beans, cut into 1-inch pieces
• 1-pound boneless chicken breasts
• 1 tablespoon fine sea salt
• ½ teaspoon of ground black pepper
Instructions
1. In a large pot, heat the olive oil over medium heat and sauté the onion, carrots, and celery until softened, about 8 minutes. Add garlic and thyme and stir for another minute.
2. Add water, green beans, chicken, salt, and pepper. Bring to boil, cover the pot, and lower the heat to simmer for 15 minutes.
3. Check on the chicken by lifting it out of the pot and testing it with a meat thermometer. When the temperature reaches 160ºF, you can use the tongs to remove the chicken and let it rest for 5 to 10 minutes, so it can finish cooking and reach a safe internal temperature of 165ºF.
4. Use two forks to shred the chicken, or cut it into small, bitesized pieces. Return the chicken back to the soup pot and adjust any seasoning to taste. You can add 1 more cup of water, for extra broth, or add in a squeeze of lemon juice, to help brighten the flavor. Ladle the soup into bowls and garnish with freshly chopped parsley.
5. Leftover soup can be stored in an airtight container in the fridge for up to 4 days. Recipe
• Timers • and more...
To Raise a Laugh
A Throaty Laugh
Ihave a >kchugh-kchugh< sore throat.
Yeah, I know. A lot of people, when they say they have a sore throat, feel the need to cough in middle of the sentence so you believe them.
I’m not even sure how my throat got like this. My guess is that it’s because I’m a parent and a teacher. But that doesn’t make sense. I’m ALWAYS a parent and a teacher.
There are different kinds of sore throat, though. I have the kind where you have to clear your throat every five seconds. And it doesn’t even help. You know how when you’re trying to concentrate on something, and there’s someone in the room that clears his throat every five seconds and drives you crazy? Well, trust me; it’s more annoying to him. He doesn’t want to be coughing every five seconds either. He’s trying to get rid of something. And he keeps trying to do it in small coughs, because he doesn’t want to annoy you, but those aren’t very effective, which is why he has to do it more often. And at this point it’s too awkward to just try one big cough and hope that’s it, because you’re already annoyed about all the little coughs.
I definitely have to do something about this, though. So I’ve been drinking a lot of tea. That way, instead of annoying people with constant throat clearing, I can annoy them with sipping, slurping, and blowing. And wet teabags at the side of my plate.
I don’t even like tea. I don’t even understand tea. I put it in the water, I take it out of the water, no leaves stay in the water, so what am I drinking? Isn’t it just water? Which is now dirty from the tea leaves? Brown water? This is mysteri-
ously going to help me? Also, I literally have not bought tea since I got married, yet we always have tea in the house. Did it come with the house? I think the British left it here.
Also, I have no heat tolerance.
Either way, I’m drinking it like crazy, which isn’t great, because all our tea has caffeine. And we have no plans of buying any that doesn’t until we use up all the tea that we have. So for example, last night I had 5 cups of tea, apparently so I could lie awake all night, clearing my throat. Because otherwise, who else is gonna do it?
Another issue that I have right now, aside from the constant need to annoy those around me, >heCHUM!<, is that it hurts when I swallow. So my wife gave me some random pills to take care of it.
“Here,” she said. “Swallow these.”
Yeah, that’ll hurt less. Especially this big one.
I’ve also been sucking on cough drops. They don’t really help, but they’re delicious. Plus I can eat candy all day and I won’t get fat, because it’s medicinal.
People have been trying to be helpful, though. Whenever you tell people that you have a >siiip< sore throat, they give you advice. Even if it doesn’t make sense. Mostly they want you to go away from them, so they give you something to do.
For example, some people advise you to gargle with warm salt water. Yeah, this may sound gross, but it doesn’t have to be salt water specifically. Just a warm, salty liquid. You can gargle on chicken soup.
Watch out for knaidlach.
Another home remedy that people do for a sore throat is keep swallowing
By Mordechai Schmutter
every two seconds to see how the pain is coming along. That doesn’t really work to heal it, but at this point I don’t know if anything works. I don’t think you cure a sore throat. I think you just do these things to pass the time until it goes away.
But what do I do in the meantime? I’ll tell you this as a teacher: If you tell your students your throat hurts, you do not get sympathy. When a teacher walks into class and goes, “I can’t yell today,” the kids don’t say, “Well then we’d better not give him a reason to yell.” They say, “Well, I guess we’ll yell instead.”
When my wife has a sore throat, she stops talking altogether. Just like that. It takes me about 24 hours to figure out that she’s not actually mad at me, and by then she’s mad at me. For spending 24 hours asking why she’s mad at me.
ME: “Are you mad at me? Why?”
WIFE: Shakes her head “no”.
ME: “No? What did I do?”
WIFE: Glares
ME: “See? You ARE mad at me.”
Maybe I should try that in class. I should just stand there and not say anything until the kids ask, “Why are you mad at us?”
No answer. Just a prolonged sip of my iced tea, for effect.
But that won’t work. Probably, my students won’t even notice that I haven’t talked for the entire period.
Mordechai Schmutter is a freelance writer and a humor columnist for Hamodia and other magazines. He has also published eight books and does stand-up comedy. You can contact him at MSchmutter@gmail.com.
HOURS
Sun-Wed 11:00-8:30
Thursday 11:00-9:00
Fri 11:00-2:00
EST 1984
Mental Health Corner
The Third Date
In the Shidduch system that is practiced in the Yeshiva-oriented community, the third date (approximately) has become the moment in time when a dating young man or woman will disclose information that the other party must process before continuing. The justification for this approach is that
if it is disclosed before the first date, they will be rejected out of hand. On the other hand, if it is disclosed later in the process it is considered dishonest, as one may have become emotionally involved and can no longer objectively process the information. The third date offers the perfect balance. The process
is far enough along that one can see the other person’s qualities and look past the “skeletons in the closet”, but it is still early enough in the process that the decision to continue or not will be relatively objective.
The information that is disclosed is sometimes related to mental health. The question then becomes how does one decide whether or not to continue dating someone who has a history of mental illness. This question has many parts to it, and in this article, we will focus on one specific point, and that is the importance that the person you are dating owns their mental illness. Just to clarify, this article is focusing on a disclosure involving a diagnosable mental illness.
For the purpose of illustration, let us imagine two different types of disclosures.
“Two years ago, my OCD really flared up, and I was briefly hospitalized. Boruch Hashem, I got the help that I needed, and my OCD is cured. I am telling this to you so I can be completely open and honest, but in reality, it is in the past and is completely irrelevant to my future.”
“Two years ago, my OCD really flared up, and I was briefly hospitalized. Boruch Hashem, I got the help that I needed, and my OCD is under control. I am still taking medication, because my therapist and psychiatrist both feel that the risks of going of off of meds outweigh the benefits. Even though I feel fine, I see my therapist once every couple of months just to touch base and review some pointers of staying healthy. I know that I have a predisposition to anxiety, and therefore I try my best to be proactive in my mental health.”
Do you see the difference between these two different disclosures? The first individual wants to be honest with the person they are dating, but is being unwittingly dishonest with themselves. A bout of mental illness that required hospitalization a mere two years prior cannot simply be dismissed as an irrelevant part of their past that they are disclosing just to be transparent. On
the other hand, the second individual is not trying to pooh-pooh their mental illness. They are taking full ownership of their mental illness and are staying one step ahead of their mental illness.
One of the differences between these two individuals is how they will handle a flare-up. The first person might ignore the early signs of an emerging problem, and by the time they recognize the problem they might be in the midst of a relapse. The second person stays one step ahead of their mental illness and does not lose sight of their need to be vigilant about their condition.
This may be analogous to someone who has high blood pressure. One approach may be that right now everything seems fine and if there is a flare-up they will deal with it then. The other approach is to be proactive. Proper diet, exercise, and regular checkups to stay one step ahead of their medical condition.
Marriage does not solve problems. Quite the contrary, it aggravates issues that each individual brings into the marriage. If someone does have a mental illness and is not being proactive in their self-care, there is a risk that the stress of marriage may be a trigger. However, a growing person who is proactive in their personal development and well-being may have actually grown and matured as a result of their mental illness, and makes them a more suitable partner in a marriage.
It is often the deepest pain and suffering that helps one grow into their highest self. When facing a prospective marriage partner on a Shidduch date with a history of mental illness, you might be pleasantly surprised to discover that their mental illness has propelled them to levels of maturity and growth that is hard to find elsewhere.
This is a service of Relief Resources. Relief is an organization that provides mental health referrals, education, and support to the frum community. Rabbi Yisrael Slansky is director of the Baltimore branch of Relief. He can be contacted at 410-4488356 or at yslansky@reliefhelp.org
Jewish History
Jerusalem Liberated Chanukah 1917
By Larry Domnitch
In 1917, as the world was engulfed in brutal armed conflict of an unprecedented scope, fighting raged in the Holy Land between Allied troops and the Ottoman-Turks (allied with the Central Powers) who had ruled the land for most of the past 400 years. On October 30, the strategic city of Beer Sheva fell to the Allies who then drove towards Jerusalem.
A London dispatch on November 24, reported that the mosque containing the tomb of the Shmuel HaNavi was bombarded. The ancient site of Mitzpeh, 5,000 yards west of Jerusalem-Nablus road, had been stormed by the British (American Jewish Chronicle, November 30, 1917, p. 91).
The major battle for Jerusalem was in full swing. British cavalry fought their way into the holy city. In the words of a commander, “When ‘charge’ sounded, I think every man went stark mad. Guns were belching their shells at us in one sheet of flame and bullets by thousands swept past, but no man seemed to get hit as on we went, with drawn swords flashing in the sun, in a long straight line, horses going like mad and everyone shouting like fury. Now, we could see some of our pals falling, yet straight at the guns we charged” (American Jewish Chronicle, February 15, 1918, p. 408).
On December 9, Turkish leaders of Jerusalem surrendered. On December 11, the second day of Chanukah, British troops marched into Jerusalem. British commander and chief General Edmund Allenby respectfully entered its walls by foot through the Jaffa Gate as the city’s thirty-fourth conqueror.
the roofs of their houses. Swarms of children, Arab, Jew, and Christian, ran with us as we marched along, and the populace clamored to any point of vantage, waving and clapping their hands, cheering and singing. Jews clad in European dress came running up, singled out any one of us, wrung him by the hand, and – talking
“On this day 2,080 years ago, the Maccabees freed the Holy City from the heathen oppressor and thereby changed the spiritual future of humanity.”
Excited crowds lined the streets to welcome the city’s liberators. Their very presence signified an end to the terrible suffering the people of Jerusalem had endured during the war.
One British officer described his entry into Jerusalem and the reception by its residents, “People of all ages and apparently of all nationalities, thronged the roadway, crowded at their doors and windows, and squeezed themselves on
excitedly in broken English – said that they, the people of Jerusalem, had been waiting for that two and a half years”
(Bernard Blaser, Kilts Across the Jordan, H.F.& B. Witherby, London, 1926, p. 120).
A Jewish periodical, The London Jewish Chronicle, headlined the event as “The Rising of Jerusalem,” describing the Allied conquest as an “epochal event.” Rabbi Hertz, chief rabbi of the British Empire, issued a statement linking the British
entry into Jerusalem to the holiday of Chanukah; “Jerusalem which, for ages, has been the majestic pole of love and reverence of the world, is now in British hands. And this soul thrilling news reaches us on the day that the Jews are celebrating the Maccabean festival. On this day 2,080 years ago, the Maccabees freed the Holy City from the heathen oppressor and thereby changed the spiritual future of humanity. Who knows but that today’s victory may form as glorious a landmark in the history of mankind” (London Jewish Chronicle, December 14, 1917, p.24).
Zionist leader Chaim Weizmann, who played a significant role in the negotiations leading to the issuing of the Balfour Declaration just six weeks earlier, which called for a Jewish homeland in the Land of Israel, phoned The London Jewish Chronicle and stated, “The news of the British victory will raise the hopes of Jews all over the world. It opens the prospects of the realization of hopes which have existed in their kinds for centuries” (ibid.).
On the day of the taking of Jerusalem, the citizens of the city awoke early and went out to the streets; first with hesitation just to see if indeed the Turkish front had indeed fallen. Then as if in a dream, to see the crowds, emerging from
General Edmund Allenby entering Jerusalem on December 11, 1917
Kever Shmuel HaNavi before the war
Mayor of Jerusalem El Husseini surrendering to British troops on December 9, 1917
their “holes” and all marching west (to the Jaffa Gate) to witness the ceremony in which the city is passed to the British conqueror. And then the city was joyful and rejoiced (David Benveniste, HaGedud HaIvri: Bimei Milchemet HaOlam HaRishona: Yoman, B’iton HaTzibur HaSephardi Va’Edot HaMizrach, Jerusalem, 1977, p. 5).
It would take time for the city to recover.
In the first month after the surrender, not much had changed. The residents had not yet recovered from the famine which had devastated the city during the war and were not healed from their sick-
nesses. There were students who were still serving in the military in countries abroad. Everyone was waiting for additional aid that would hopefully come from afar. In the meantime, communication with Tel-Aviv Jaffa residents was renewed. They were liberated a few weeks before Jerusalem.
However, soon the city began to be revitalized. New infrastructures and facilities were constructed. Significant quantities of wheat were imported from Egypt every month. Pipes were installed to allow water to be brought into the Old City of Jerusalem.
A noticeable sign of revitalization and
growth was when the cornerstone to the future Hebrew University was laid upon its future site on Mount Scopus on April 10, 1918.
Jerusalem had yet again endured.
Seventy-five years later, on December 10, 1992, Jerusalem resident Anna-Grace Lind again watched Allenby stride into Jerusalem. This time, she was viewing Viscount Allenby, the general’s great-nephew, entering the city with Jerusalem’s Mayor Teddy Kollek during events commemorating the 75 th anniversary of Ottoman surrender to the British. Kollek stated, “The British were welcomed equally by Jews, Christians,
and Muslims, all of whom suffered under 400 years of Turkish rule.” (JTA, December 10, 1992)
Today, the Jaffa Gate is a reminder of the scene of the triumphant march into Jerusalem.
Jerusalem is the magnificent and bustling capital of Israel. The British conquest of Jerusalem was a step in that long journey.
Larry Domnitch is the author of The Impact of World War One on the Jewish People, released by Urim Publications. He lives in Efrat.
Turkish troops passing through Jaffa Gate in 1914
Kotel,
TJH Centerfold
FBI Slang Terms That Work Well in the Dorm
“Juice Card”: Refers to an agent’s level of influence or authority within the Bureau. (Trying to convince the cook to let you have cholent on Thursday night? You need someone with a good juice card to talk to him.)
“Black Bag Job”: Covert break-in operations. (Climbing over the wall to get into the kitchen to steal cholent because the cook said no.)
“Dead Drop”: A prearranged secret location for exchanging messages or items. you succeed with the black bag job and have the cholent, you need a dead drop where you can split up the goods with the boys.)
“Canary Trap”: A technique used to track down leaks by giving different individuals slightly varied information. (Need to know who told the Rosh Yeshiva that guys break into the kitchen to get cholent? When you have a suspect, stand near him
and tell someone else in confidence that you are the culprit. If the mashgiach calls you into the office, your canary trap worked.)
“10-7”: Radio code for out of service. (The Betty Crocker in the dorm kitchen is 10-7... which is why you needed to sneak into the kitchen to steal cholent in the first place!)
Backstopping: Creating a false identity or cover story to support an undercover operation. (Telling the janitor who spotted you with the cholent that you are in charge of the kitchen.)
“The Bubble”: Slang for FBI headquarters in Washington, D.C. (Once you eat the cholent and are ready to try to sleep a “full bagel,” you go under the covers in your bubble and it’s lights out for the next 12 hours!)
You Gotta Be Kidding Me
An FBI agent, Mossad agent, and a KGB agent are all trying to prove they are the best at catching criminals. There is a widely publicized contest to put them to the test. A rabbit is released into a forest, and each of them has to catch it.
The FBI receive 1,000 tips about the rabbit’s location but refuses to investigate.
The Mossad agent sets up a bunch of beepers to explode all over the forest but does not find the rabbit.
The KGB drags a man out of the forest and beats him as he screams, “OK, I’m a rabbit!”
FBI Trivia
1. How long did the first FBI director, J. Edgar Hoover, serve as Director of the FBI?
a. 6 months
b. 12 years
c. 28 years
d. 48 years
2. Approximately how many FBI special agents are there in the United States?
a. 13,000
b. 22,000
c. 34,000
d. 120,000
4. What is the name of the FBI’s training academy?
a. Quantico
b. Fort Meade
c. Langley
d. Vault
5. What is the FBI’s yearly budget?
a. $2.4 billion
b. $10.7 billion
c. $34.1 billion
d. $110 billion
3. What is the motto of the FBI?
a. Fortitude, Balanced, Intelligence
b. Fidelity, Bravery, Integrity
c. Service, Loyalty, Honor
d. Truth, Law, Courage
Riddle me This
John and Bob go out for drinks.
6. Since its inception in 1950, the FBI’s Ten Most Wanted Fugitives list has featured 532 individuals. How many have been apprehended?
a. 47
b. 112
c. 243
d. 494
Answers:
1-D
2-A
3-B
4-A
5-B
6-D
Wisdom key:
5-6 correct: You are qualified to be the next FBI director. Too bad for you, Trump plans on nominating Kash Patel for the job.
2-4 correct: You are a middle of the road guy. It’s people like you that we need to watch out for. Next thing we know, you will be on the FBI’s Most Wanted list…. “What?! That guy?!”
0-1 correct: You don’t know anything about the FBI. That’s why the FBI agent doesn’t even mute himself when he sneezes while tapping your phone.
It’s a blazing hot summer day, so while they are waiting for their meals, they’re both served a glass of ice water.
John is sweating a ton and is extra thirsty, so he chugs down three glasses of ice water right at the start.
Bob only takes sips of his water
throughout the meal.
Later that day, Bob texts John that he is violently ill and feels extremely weak. Before midnight, Bob is pronounced dead by the police.
John is brought in for questioning, and it’s found out that both his and Bob’s drinks were poisoned.
You are the FBI agent on the case and have to figure out why only Bob died.
Answer: The poison was in the ice. Since John was so thirsty, he drank his glass so fast, and the ice cubes never had a chance to melt and poison him.
Notable Quotes
“Say What?!”
Tammy and I had dinner with Donald Trump. He lives part of the year in New Jersey. I spoke to him Monday to congratulate him
– New Jersey Gov. Phil Murphy (D) at an event this week disclosing that politics is really just a game
He’s a very different animal privately than he is publicly, which is fascinating to us. I spoke to him last Monday to congratulate him. – ibid.
That’s the game… We say things up on a stage to get people riled up that is at least packaged in a way that is more extreme than they really are. – ibid.
We are actually good friends, as are our wives. - ibid.
Hypocrisy isn’t illegal, nor is it particularly unusual in politics. It’s not like he’s ever going to run again, so why not take care of your kid, even if you said you weren’t going to? I respect it. I don’t have a problem with it. The problem is, the rest of the Democrats made Biden’s pledge to not pardon Hunter the foundation of their defense of America.
- Jon Stewart
My views have changed a lot from October 6 until today.
- Louis Har, who was rescued from Gaza several months ago, on a podcast
I don’t trust any of them. I know that in some way, everyone in Gaza is involved. They were born to hate. They are given weapons when they are babies. They’re happy to sacrifice their children to kill Jews. That’s how they live.
- ibid.
To achieve dialogue and coexistence, several generations of proper education in which hatred isn’t taught need to pass. That does not exist. There is no one to talk to. Before I was abducted, I wanted to live in the country in peace and coexistence.
– ibid.
The ICC has decided to delay arrest warrants for Assad, Kim Jong Un, Putin and Khamenei until they become Jewish.
- Tweet by Hillel Fuld
Angola, a vibrant city. Look, not the city. The city, I know, is not Angola. But in Angola, in a vibrant city.
- Pres. Biden speaking in the African country Angola
Never again do I want to hear, “Oh, Donald Trump’s a liar. You can’t believe anything he says. Donald Trump will abuse his power. Donald Trump will only use the system to benefit himself and his family,” and so on and so forth. Never again.
- Conservative commentator Scott Jennings on CNN after Pres. Biden pardoned his son Hunter despite saying many times that he would absolutely not pardon him
It’s a terrible development for the men and women of the FBI and also for the nation that depends on a highly functioning, professional, independent Federal Bureau of Investigation.
- Former FBI Deputy Director Andrew McCabe, who was one of the key figures in the Russia hoax, on CNN decrying Kash Patel being picked as the new director of the FBI
That’s just the California way!
- Senator Alex Padilla (D-CA) on “Face the Nation” saying that California will use taxpayer money on “legal assistance, legal advice, legal support” for illegal migrants
We’re totally powerless.
– Democrat strategist James Carville
“The Resistance” is gonna have trouble raising money. These fundraisers are burnt. They’re really pissed now. And the damage that the 2024 campaign has done – the damage that this decade has done – to the Democratic brand is almost unfathomable.
- ibid.
I’m telling you, without complete transparency, the campaign we think raised a billion and a half dollars. We know that [Political Action Committee] Future Forward, the last we heard was $900 million. So we can assume that they got to a billion before the election. That’s $2.5 freaking billion dollars. Do you have any idea where that money went? Does anybody have any idea where that money went?
- ibid.
Donor’s dollars weren’t just burned — they were incinerated. - ibid.
This pardon is just deflating for those of us who’ve been out there for a few years yelling about what a threat Trump is. “Nobody is above the law,” we’ve been screaming. Well, Joe Biden just made clear his son Hunter is above the law.
- Liberal and honest radio host Joe Walsh on MSNBC
Dating Dialogue What Would You Do If…
Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW of The Navidaters
Dear Navidaters,
Thank you for your thought-provoking column. I was wondering if you could help me with something.
I am 29 and have been dating a really nice girl for the past month and a half. (I’ll call her Adena.) Things are going well. We share similar interests and goals; we respect each other. I can see that she would be a great wife and mother. What worries me is that she seems to like shopping a bit too much and is pretty high maintenance. She invited me to Thanksgiving at her family’s home, and in her room she has a walk-in-closet full of the highest end shoes/ clothing. When we have conversations, she often mentions things she has ordered that she’s excited to get. She also loves going to the mall with friends more than anything.
I make a nice living, but I don’t believe in overspending on things like that. I probably wouldn’t even have noticed this if it wasn’t for my best friend having issues in his marriage due to his wife’s requests for constantly ordering new clothes, watches, jewelry, shoes,etc. He is in kollel and not yet working, so I’m not sure what his wife was thinking to begin with marrying someone knowing it would be a kollel lifestyle and that he was not yet working. I know he can’t keep up and he is very unhappy that he can’t afford the things she wants to spend their limited budget on. I don’t want to end up like that –even if I could afford it, I don’t believe in it.
Are these things I have seen in Adena true issues or am I just overly sensitive based on my best friend’s experience?
Thank you,
Naftoli*
Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions. Our intention is not to offer any definitive conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.
The Panel
Dear Readers,
We want to offer YOU an opportunity to be part of the discussion! Please email us at MichelleMondShadchan@gmail.com, subject line “reader’s response,” if you would like to participate in the new “A Reader’s Response” columnist spot. We will send you a question and publish your answer in an upcoming Navidaters edition. Looking forward!
Michelle, the “Shadchan”
The Rebbetzin
Rebbetzin Faigie Horowitz, M.S.
Naftoli, your concern about Adena’s spending and high maintenance are legitimate. It’s smart to put it on the table and discuss it soon. People come to marriage with different patterns, different attitudes, and different histories with money and finances, and these differences are hard to navigate as it is, without it being a surprise. Therefore, consider yourself blessed that you noticed this and see how the conversation goes. Obviously, you are not going to jump on this difference. Rather, you may want to broach it in terms of family differences, family cultures, history connected with money, etc. Be sensitive and careful yet honest. Talk about yourself and that you are a person who will always live within a budget and why. Talk about your friend’s
experience. Talk about the awareness today of financial education for young people in yeshivos and seminaries. Talk about the organizations that help people navigate the high costs of Jewish life today such as RSK, Mesilah, Living Smarter Jewish, etc.
This is a serious issue that must be discussed to see where it goes.
The Shadchan
Michelle Mond
You are in a very difficult conundrum.
I am sure that after dating many girls over the course of the last many years, you recognize how rare it is to come so close to finding the right one. It is because of this that I am especially impressed that you are able to look realistically at problems that may potentially arise. It is easy to look at the shidduch with rose-colored
Pulling It All Together
Dear Naftoli,
Thank you for writing! Your dilemma is understandable and valid. The short answer is that communicating with Adena is going to be your best bet. Before a couple gets engaged, they need to speak about a whole host of topics and ideas to see if they are generally compatible, share similar goals and values and if they are all-over aligned. This may or may not be a deal breaker.
glasses when you are excited. Many young women and men jump quickly to engagement because they are simply excited to get to the next stage rather than honing in on details of compatibility.
The way you describe it, it does indeed sound like the two of you have very different standards of spending and living. It does not matter how much money you make. If you are mindful regarding spending and you have a wife demanding a new Van Cleef bracelet every milestone or constant online shopping sprees, you will end up resentful. The story with your friend heightens your worries because you see how such a mismatch can play out.
You have to talk to Adena as soon as possible about your worries and concerns. Be very honest with her, while remaining caring and compassionate. After having open communication about this topic, you will be a lot more equipped to make an informed decision about how to proceed. Hatzlacha!
The Zaidy
Dr. Jeffrey Galler
What you are describing is precisely why it is so important for singles to date long enough and really get to know each other.
It does not matter if you, or her parents, can afford her high maintenance lifestyle.
The incompatible problem here is that
The most important thing to look out for in any type of conversation is kindness and respect and validation around a subject matter that is dear to your heart. Should Adena tell you that this lifestyle is deeply important to her and she can’t imagine living without it, you will have an important decision to make. Should Adena tell you that she is open to hearing what you have to say, makes you feel heard and understood (and you to her as well), and is willing to compromise in a way that makes you both feel comfortable, then there is a path forward. Though completely natural, try not
she enjoys shopping and spending, while you detest overspending. No amount of pre-marriage communication, compromise, or counseling can succeed in reconciling such a core difference in values. She might be a wonderful girl and you might be a wonderful guy, but it’s time for both of you to move on and find more suitable partners.
Remember Rudyard Kipling’s observation: “East is East and West is West, but never the twain shall meet…”
The Reader’s Response
Sarala Cohen
When it comes to spending, it all comes down to budgeting. You need to make sure to spend within your means and set aside money for emergencies, simchas and whatnot. It would probably be good to talk about finances before getting married so you’re both on the same page. There are ways if one is thrifty to have nice clothing and the fancy brands and to get them at a much cheaper price.
With your friend, it sounds like there were unrealistic expectations when heading into his marriage. But with Adina, if she is indeed the future wife that you see will be the one, you need to be able to sit down and have a mature and open discussion about finances and shopping budgets.
to look too deeply into your friend’s marriage to make decisions about your own relationship. It is quite possible that your friend is in the place he is in because he and his wife did not communicate before marriage, or he doesn’t know how to make boundaries and express himself, or that she is not interested in his comfort, or that she has a shopping addiction. We simply do not know.
My hope is that you will open up to Adena and talk. You will have more information once you do.
All the best, Jennifer
Jennifer Mann, LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist and certified trauma healing life coach, as well as a dating and relationship coach working with individuals, couples, and families in private practice at 123 Maple Avenue in Cedarhurst, NY. To set up a consultation or to ask questions, please call 718-908-0512. Visit www.thenavidaters.com for more information. If you would like to submit a dating or relationship question to the panel anonymously, please email JenniferMannLCSW@gmail.com. You can follow The Navidaters on FB and Instagram for dating and relationship advice.
The Magic of Dr. Fluency Treating Stuttering and Saving Lives
By Eliyahu RosEnBERg
TJH: Let’s rewind a bit. Can you give me some background on how Dr. Fluency got started?
David Harris: When dealing with dysfluency, which could be stuttering, stammering, or cluttering –any disruption of fluent speech – it turns out there was no viable solution. People would spend years and years doing speech therapy and were getting nowhere. Even if they’d experience partial improvements, relapse was inevitable. It turns out that there was a missing component: this problem, just like many other problems, needed to be technology based.
It’s kind of like hearing problems. Back in the day,
people were branded deaf and dumb because, if you couldn’t hear, you couldn’t develop the ability to speak. But in the 1970s, there were emerging computer technologies where people could speak into a microphone and get visual feedback of whether they were making a shh sound or fuh sound, and that’s how they were able to learn how to speak. Until then, they only had sign language. But in the ‘70s, these children were learning how to speak, and now with amazing implant technology they can really hear.
So, it seems there are certain problems that can’t be solved without technology. And it was the same with
Twenty years ago, a recovering stutterer teamed up with a software engineer to finally create an effective therapy to treat dysfluency – stuttering, stammering, and cluttering – thus allowing anyone to achieve fluent speech. Born from their efforts was Dr. Fluency, a program that leverages ai technology to treat the condition. so far, the award-winning program has granted 2,500 patients in israel the gift of fluent speech. and just recently, the program expanded to the Five Towns.
last week, TJh interviewed one of Dr. Fluency’s founding members: software expert in the field of computer recognition and CEo of Fluentech David harris. During our discussion, we touched on Dr. Fluency’s humble beginnings, how the program works, and the causes and side effects of stuttering, among other topics.
stuttering and dysfluency, where it turns out that, in order to overcome this problem, going once a week to a speech pathologist is useless because what you need to do is relearn how to speak correctly.
Dysfluency can be defined as a loss of control. What do I mean? The person knows what he wants to say. When you’re speaking to someone who stutters, he knows exactly what he wants to say and exactly how to say the word, but sometimes when he tries to say the word, he blocks; he loses control and he can’t get the word out. That could lead to a whole slew of side effects, which we will discuss later. But the real prob -
The Dr. Fluency tablet
lem is that he’s losing control.
And when a person loses control, the only way to solve the problem is to rebuild that control, and that requires technology. Without the feedback from The Dr. Fluency tablet computer, the AI-based technology that we developed, you’re not going to be able to learn how to speak correctly.
It’s kind of like learning how to play the piano. The piano teacher has to have a piano to teach you. And when you go home, you must have a piano or at least a keyboard to practice what you learned during the lesson. Now, imagine if the boy doesn’t have a piano at home. He’ll go once a week to his teacher trying to learn how to play, but he won’t have the means to practice it at home. It would be a waste of time. Now, the current situation in speech pathology is that the teacher himself or herself doesn’t even have a piano but is still trying to teach a kid to play the piano.
Can you expand on that?
When you go to a speech pathologist, and they don’t have the necessary technology, trying to learn how to speak correctly will be a waste of time. Without a real piano, you cannot teach a kid to play the piano. And going home, if he doesn’t have a piano, he has nothing to practice on. So that’s how Dr. Fluency is, like my brother Eli who is CEO of Dr. Fluency USA calls it: “the piano for stuttering.”
With our program, the speech pathologist has the technology to teach you the correct techniques: how to breathe correctly, how to use your vocal cords correctly, how to use your articulators correctly, the amount of pressure to apply—you constantly get feedback from Dr. Fluency that is telling you all the time if you’re doing it correctly or not. So, without this technology, the speech pathologist can’t administer effective therapy, and the patient won’t have the correct tools to practice at home correctly to actually create and establish his abilities and make the therapy effective.
So, the program is like the piano that you need to be able to practice what the speech pathologist shows you in sessions. I can understand how important that is in order to make real progress. How did you get involved in this program?
As software professional whose expertise is computer recognition, artificial intelligence, and voice recognition, I was teamed up with a fellow who actually did
turn this therapy into a computerized system. The investors matched him up with me, and the rest was history.
We started twenty years ago. We recently opened up Dr. Fluency USA in the Five Towns and Brooklyn, and we have already successfully treated 25 patients here. In Israel, there have been 2,500 patients that we’ve treated successfully. On our website, you can see hundreds of them coming to our annual conferences. At the end of the year, we hold an annual conference where the graduates and the parents come, and after a quick review of the year with the clinical staff, the patients’ families and people from the professional community join us, and the patients, from young kids to seniors, get up and speak in front of the crowd of usually 150 to 300 people. So all those people on our website are talking in front of a tremendous crowd of hundreds of people.
That’s super impressive – public speaking in front of such a large audience! Tell us how the program works.
Basically, it’s a 15-stage course where you’re learning different targets. We’re learning the different elements of speech such as how to breathe correctly, how to use the voice and the vocal cords correctly, and how to use one’s articulators correctly. Basically, we’re learning how to speak from scratch. This is a process that requires hundreds of hours of practice; nobody is going to sit with their speech pathologist for hundreds of hours. And it turns out that the human ear isn’t sensitive enough. We won’t even know if this person is doing the exercises correctly, while the Dr. Fluency technology will immediately tell the patient if he did it correctly or not and give specific feedback for each and every syllable so that the person can, next time around, correct and constantly improve.
“After a minute and a half of not being able to get his name out, he tapped his father on the knee to say his name for him.”
intensive therapy at a hospital in Israel, where they had specialized equipment. They were able to teach him in a three-week intensive course how to speak correctly. Turns out, he was speaking beautifully after three weeks of intensive therapy. But going home, he was instructed to practice half an hour a day, but he didn’t have the correct feedback and the tools to see if he was practicing correctly or not. And sure enough, three months later, even after daily intensive practice, the stuttering was back. So, he came up with the idea to
If you’re practicing half an hour a day, you’ll complete the course within two, three months. We’ve had people who were more anxious to get through it, and they practiced for a few hours a day, and they completed the course within a couple of weeks. Of course, if you slack off with your practice during that first critical year, then you might experience a certain amount of relapse. But the beautiful thing is that, within a couple of weeks of good practice, you’ll be back on the horse.
So, they use Dr. Fluency to brush up after they meet with the speech pathologist?
Well, the speech pathologist will teach them what to do using Dr. Fluency. And then, they go home with their own personalized tablet and practice with that. The Dr. Fluency tablet will give them feedback if they’re practicing correctly what they learned in the session. By the way, when they come back a week later, unlike with the piano teacher who has to take your word for it, here, every single exercise is recorded, and the speech pathologist sees exactly what transpired during that week: how much you practiced, when you practiced, how successful you were. We see everything.
What causes dysfluency? Is there a psychological component to stuttering or stammering?
They don’t know much about the disorder itself. But
what they have come up with is…that it’s very similar to most neurological disorders. They know it’s transferred genetically, just like many other problems in the human body. They’ve actually pinpointed the specific genes that cause the problem. And if something is genetic, you also know that this is not a psychological disorder.
However, dysfluency does have a tremendous psychological impact on the person suffering from this problem. Because, as you know, speech is our most essential component. Communication is the most essential component of the human psyche—of our nefesh. So, when someone has trouble speaking and conveying their message correctly, that’s going to have a tremendous impact on them psychologically.
So, it’s the opposite of the stigma – a speech disorder isn’t caused by psychological phenomena, but it can have a psychological impact on the sufferer. And it’s a very cruel stigma.
The speech system happens to be the most complex system, motorically, in the human body. You’re activating over 200 muscles when you speak, even if you’re just sitting down… The problem is that these people lose control over those 200 muscles, and they can’t get the word out. Now, eventually, they’ll regain control and be able to say that word, but at the most critical moment, they lose control, causing them to block.
Take stuttering, for instance. What’s stuttering? It’s when you repeat syllables. A child might come up to you and say, “Me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, also.” So, you might think that he stutters because he’s repeating that “me” sound. But why is he actually doing it? He’s trying to say, “Me, also.” He says “me,” but the word “also” gets stuck in his throat. His vocal cords lock up, and he can’t get the word out. What is he going to do? He’ll put it in reverse and try again. “Me” – block again. “Me” – block again. “Me” – block again. Until he can finally break through. So, what you’re actually hearing is not the problem. They think he has a problem with the word “me.” No – the word “me” is coming out great! His problem is the next word that you don’t even hear because it’s stuck in his throat. It’s this tip-of-the-iceberg effect, where what you’re hearing and seeing is just the tip of what’s hiding beneath the surface.
By the way, there are a lot of side effects. Many kids, when they block, they’ll apply pressure to try to get the word out. That could lead to facial contortions, head jerking, eye blinking, and body twitching. It’s so frustrating – you’re trying to get the word out, you’ll do anything to get it out! Other kids will use filler words like “uh” or “like” until the word comes out. Many kids will take this whole problem in the opposite direction. They’ll develop a very rapid speech rate because when the kid knows he’s going to block, he wants to get as many words in while he can. He may also swallow and slur his words…
So we don’t treat stuttering. We don’t treat cluttering, which is fast speech. We don’t treat stammering, which is the pressuring of words out and blocking. Because all of these are side effects. We treat the dysfluency. When parents come in, the first thing we do is a full free eval to make sure that there really is a fluency issue.
Despite the title, this is not a miracle cure. This is hard work. It’s half an hour a day for a whole year—not because it takes a year to improve (the improvement will come very quickly if you spend half an hour a day within a couple of
months). The problem is that that’s not enough to improve your speech permanently. You also have to keep up the practice to A) turn it into second nature; and B) maintain your progress.
Is the program generally easier for younger people than for older patients?
It’s a double-edged sword. On the one hand, someone who’s very young might be less motivated and may have trouble being consistent. And then it’s going to be the parents who are actually doing the course, so they will
You probably have so many heartening stories from dealing with thousands of patients in Israel and quite a few in the United States. Is there a specific story you’d like to share with readers?
There are two stories that I’ll tell you. The first is of a 15-year-old boy, a Vizhnitz chassid, who was blocking on every single syllable when I originally met him. And a couple of months later, he was speaking fluently. And half a year in, he was made Purim Rav in his yeshiva! It turns out he’s a very funny boy, but nobody knew that because he couldn’t complete a sentence. And now he’s melamed in cheder
“Without this technology, the speech pathologist can’t administer effective therapy, and the patient won’t have the correct tools to practice at home correctly to actually create and establish his abilities and make the therapy effective.”
have to be very motivated. On the other hand, when you treat someone who’s 18, 50, or 70, you’re dealing with life habits that are much more powerful and more entrenched. So, catching it at an early age is tremendously valuable, although the challenge will be that the parents will have to be much more dedicated than with older children.
The other story is of David, a boy who we met a year ago here in New York. When I met with him, he would block terribly. And then the words would burst out of his mouth. And you’d ask, “What?” And then he would start all over again. When he walked in, and we started the assessment with the speech pathologist, we asked his name. And after a minute and a half of not being able to get his name out, he tapped his father on the knee to say his name for him. When I asked how old his sister was, he held up both hands to tell me that she was ten.
After finishing the program, he’s now trying to get accepted to a very prestigious college. He put together a resume, and he has a podcast now. He originally couldn’t say his name, and now he’s doing a podcast!
Any last thoughts or ideas that you want to share with the readers?
Don’t give up. I know that people have tried everything. There are so many charlatans out there who take advantage. There are so many well-meaning speech pathologists who don’t really have the tools and the ability to help. But don’t give up.
I’ve had tremendous nachas from doing this. You know, coming from high tech, I’ve had opportunities for a much better parnassah than I make now. But I’ve never experienced a better way to make a parnassah. My brother always kids that I’m invited to more bar mitzvahs and weddings than his rabbi in shul!
It’s amazing nachas. Just hearing from the boys who, for the first time, gave a presentation in class, got up to be chazzan, got an aliyah; the bar mitzvah boys who were giving drashahs they never dreamt they could do. Or kids going out on shidduchim and being able to say a simple thing like “Harei at mikudeshet li ,” which was something they feared their whole life. To experience with them their sudden ability to do things they never dreamt of—is an amazing zechus. It’s mamish a life saved, every single time. Even when it’s just your quality of life or being able to fulfill your full potential, it’s a whole new level of living.
By the way, we also urge professionals in the field and family and pediatric MDs to contact us as we are happy to provide more info face-to-face. And we often give talks to educational staff – providing enlightening info regarding this problem for perplexed educators who don’t know how to deal with a child suffering from this problem.
Our website is chockfull of info and hundreds of videos of our patients speaking at the conferences and being interviewed. I do suggest anyone dealing with the problem or professionals to visit the site at www.drfluencyusa.com and contact us for further information and set up a meeting.
Ari Purec & Aliza Yudkowsky
Chaim Singer (Potomac) & Shira Charna David (Lakewood)
Levi Yitzchok Klein (Brooklyn) & Esti Muller (Baltimore)
Want to see your simcha here? Email mazeltov@baltimorejewishhome.com or text 443-675-6507 to submit your simcha!
Avrumi & Mindy Weiner on the birth of a son
Jacob & Ilana Dorfman on the birth of twin sons
CJ & Malki Elefant on the birth of a daughter
Chemi & Sara Leah Lefkovitz on the birth of a daughter
Rabbi And Mrs. Aron Tendler on the birth of a son
Nema & Sarah Rich on the birth of a son
Isaac & Jennifer Ouzana on the birth of a son
Want to see your simcha here? Email mazeltov@baltimorejewishhome.com or text 443-675-6507 to submit your simcha!
Eliezer S., 9
Yehudis Neuberger, 10
Note: Not all submission have been published. Keep sending in your artwork for another chance to be featured!
Tali Stern, 4
Hadassah Reva Michelsohn, 8
Zecharia Khoshkheraman, 7
Temima Gryll
Ariella, 6
B.M., 9 (and Y.M.M., 10)
Elisheva Schwartz, 6
Shira Michelsohn, 5
Yehonatan Baron, 5
Yosef Tzvi Michelsohn, 3
Note: Not all submission have been published. Keep sending in your artwork for another chance to be featured!
Blima Leah S., 8
Michali Sinaie, 9
Sara Schwartz, 9
Tzipora Loewy, 4
Racheli Schwartz, 3
Tzipora Feigenbaum, 11
Eitan L., 7
Dovi S., 6
Chani Waxman, 7
D.S., 10
Ayala Khoshkheraman, 3
Chava S., 6
Akiva T., 4
Eitan Noff, 4
Leah Edeltuch, 4
Dalya Cohen, 9
Danny Edeltuch, 8
Chana Rotberg, 10
Elchanan Attar, 6
Avraham Sharp, 6
Arielle Kastner, 6
Chaya K., 7
Avigail T., 6
Ari & Rivka Rosenbaum, 8 Akiva Attar, 3
School of Thought
“Are We There Yet?”
By Etti Siegel
Iwas visiting a second grade math class in my role as a teacher’s coach, ready to help the teacher with clarity of instruction during a lesson. I made myself as comfortable as I could on a decidedly uncomfortable student’s chair and watched as the teacher raced around the room giving out a worksheet she had created specifically for this lesson. I did not think much of the fact that the children who received the math sheet first were taking out scissors and beginning to cut up the page until the teacher went back to her desk, looked at the class, and I saw her face fall.
“Girls,” she said exasperatedly, “Morah did not tell you to cut anything!”
I quietly excused myself and went to a different classroom, giving her space to deal with this small hiccup without my presence causing her undue stress.
But the question remained: Why did her students, who adore her and want to behave perfectly for her, cut up a math sheet they were given?
The teacher was a very skilled graphic designer and loved creating her own sheets for the class. This time, she designed the page with a dotted line design.
Dotted lines usually mean “cut here,” and so her students did.
When we met, I explained that clear instructions would have prevented the whole fiasco in the first place. Children want to do what is right, so tell them beforehand!
This is something every adult should do whenever embarking on a journey, educational or otherwise, with anyone!
For example:
“Alright everyone, we’re heading to the park today! We’ll be driving there for about 15 minutes, and once we arrive, we’ll have a picnic lunch under the big oak tree. After that, we can play on the swings and slide, and maybe even explore the little wooded area near the playground. Remember to bring your water bottle and wear comfortable shoes for walking and running!”
Key points to include when giving information to kids about where they’re going:
• Destination: Clearly state where you’re going (e.g.,
“the park,” “the beach,” “the zoo”).
• Travel time: Give a rough idea of how long the journey will take (“about 20 minutes in the car”).
• Activities: Mention what activities you plan to do there (“play on the swings,” “build sandcastles,” “look at the animals”).
• Important items: Remind them to bring necessary things like water bottles, snacks, sunscreen, or hats.
• Simple language: Use clear and easy-to-understand words appropriate for their age.
• Visual aids: Consider using a map or pictures to show them the location and route if needed. It would have been so helpful if the teacher would have started the lesson holding up the math sheet and said, “Okay, girls, it’s that wonderful time of day when we get to do math. I am going to give you a math sheet that will help us understand the type of math problem we are going to be working on today. When you get this sheet (holding it up to show the class) please write your name on the top line and then turn it over, white side up. When everyone has a sheet, Morah will instruct the class to turn it back over.”
Since time immemorial, children like to know where they are going, when they will get there, and what will happen when they get there.
In classrooms, that means writing the schedule on the board for the day, holding up sheets and booklets while explaining what will be happening and what the children are expected to do, and giving over our expectations before going to an assembly or even before having recess.
In our homes, it means giving a five-minute “heads-up” that supper or bedtime is coming up so children can wrap up what they are doing. It means explaining and reminding children of the steps needed for the event (“please put your plate and cutlery in the sink when you are done”).
I see children at the supermarket having meltdowns and I feel sorry for them and for their parents, but I also wonder if the children were given the heads-up (we are going to the supermarket and you will be allowed to help Mommy put the food we need into the cart, but we will not be choosing any nosh today/ we will only be choosing one nosh today) so they know what to expect.
She shares the destination (math), the time and activities (write your name and turn it white side up, and when everyone gets one, we will turn it back over), and she uses simple language. By holding it up, she adds the visual aid for those children who comprehend better with that assist. It sounds so obvious and simple, right? But in class after class, and outing after outing, I notice teachers and parents who don’t remember the simple fact: Since time immemorial, children like to know where they are going, when they will get there, and what will happen when they get there.
Let’s provide clear and concise instructions before starting any activity or assignment or going to any specialty or assembly, ensuring students fully understand what is expected of them by outlining the task, key steps, deadlines, and any specific requirements, while also checking for comprehension to avoid confusion and maximize student success.
Let’s tell children of all ages where they are going before buckling them or herding them into the car, and give them a clear understanding of the time, destination, and what will happen while there. (Letting them know how long they will be staying is wise, too.)
Children like to know where they are going, when they will get there, and what will happen when they get there –so let’s tell them!
Mrs. Etti Siegel holds an MS in Teaching and Learning/Educational Leadership and brings sound teaching advice to her audiences culled from her over 35 years of teaching and administrative experience. She is an Adjunct at the College of Mount Saint Vincent/Sara Shenirer. She is a coach and educational consultant for Catapult Learning, is a sought-after mentor and workshop presenter around the country, and a popular presenter for Sayan (a teacher-mentoring program), Hidden Sparks, and the Consortium of Jewish Day Schools. She is a frequent contributor to Hamechanech Magazine and The Journal for Jewish Day School leaders. She will be answering your education-based questions and writing articles weekly for The Jewish Home. Mrs. Siegel can be reached at ettisiegel@gmail.com.
