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CONTENTS

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

NOVEMBER 22, 2018

COMMUNITY Around the Community . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .6 Community Calendar . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 36

JEWISH THOUGHT Rabbi Zvi Teichman. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 32 Rabbi Steven Burg . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 38

PEOPLE 613 Seconds with Rabbi Avrohom Leventhal . . . 17

HUMOR & ENTERTAINMENT Centerfold. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 44 Notable Quotes. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 46

LIFESTYLES Dating Dialogue. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 52 Health and Fitness. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 58 Mental Health Corner. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 64 The Story of Chanukah. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 65 Gluten Free Recipe Column. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 70 Your Money. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 71

NEWS

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Israel News . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18 National News. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 26 That’s Odd. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 28

Dear Readers, In this week’s parshah, midrash describes how Yaakov Avinu was punished for hiding his daughter Dinah from Eisav. Why was he punished for protecting her from an older, violent man, with three other wives, to boot? Rashi says, quoting Bereishis Rabbah, that perhaps she would have caused him to repent. Yet we’re also told that Yosef was rewarded for hiding Rochel Imeinu “from the eyes of that wicked one.” So which one is it: Was it a good thing to protect the women or not? As with most questions in the Talmud, the answer is “it depends.” Dinah would’ve had a positive effect, whereas Rochel would not. Putting the technicalities aside, there is a very important lesson here. Asking a simple “but is it right or wrong” won’t always get the correct response. The answer could be “it depends.” For one person it’s a mitzvah, and for another it’s the opposite. The next time we see someone acting in a way that looks wrong when seen through our glasses, give him the benefit of the doubt; it may just be right on target when seen through his. And the next time we want to do something “because they do it,” we should take a moment to think if it’s still right when we do. Ultimately, the truth of all our deeds will only be revealed once Moshiach has arrived and ushered in the coming redemption. Wishing you a wonderful Shabbos, Shalom

The Baltimore Jewish Home is an independent bi-weekly newspaper. All opinions expressed by the journalists, contributors and/or advertisers printed and/or quoted herein are solely their opinions and do not reflect the opinions of BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME, their parent company or affiliates, and may have been previously disseminated by them on television, radio, Internet or another medium. The Baltimore Jewish Home is not responsible for typographical errors, or for the kashrus of any product or business advertised within. The BJH contains words of Torah. Please treat accordingly.

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THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Baltimore Chesed League Continues its Mission

he Baltimore Chesed League Girls division, sponsored by Blue Ocean Realty, continued its mission of engaging in chesed throughout our community. On November 11th all teams participated in Chai’s Good Neighbor Day. The girls truly got their hands dirty as they cleaned up the Cross Country stream and/or helped rake leaves of some of the elderly community members. One resident said she looks forward to this each year and she wanted to come out and help the girls rake her property! The last week of the league’s activities brought smiles to all who participated: Details by Dena met their new friends of The Friendship Circle at the Hunt Valley Home Depot where they helped build wooden Menorahs and toolboxes and got to give some of the parents a small break, which they learned can be very necessary for parents of children with special needs and different abilities.

Adina B. Cosmetics went to Levindale to help the residents get in the Thanksgiving spirit! They made turkeys and decorated bags that will be filled with candy and distributed on Thanksgiving day. The residents loved the girls’ enthusiasm. Mimi Boutique spent time with Menucha participants and provided entertainment in the form of various games, including one where participants could win pennies. They offered the players the option of turning their winnings back in to be donated to tzedakah and everyone made that choice! The team selected Chai Lifeline as the recipient of the pennies and they felt tremendous pride that they were able to give tzedakah. Team Mimi Boutique also left a craft activity that Menucha participants could use another day. Teams Nina Elman Interior, The Candy Story and Leba D. Photography joined forces to bring joy to the residents of JCS group homes. The girls set up the room with Bingo

boards, snacks and drinks and then jumped right into interacting with their new friends. They took turns calling out the Bingo numbers and running the prize table. The coordinator for this event, Rozi Rice, left the girls with an important message. She told them that sometimes you can’t see the results of what you do, but she reassured them

12/22/18

that even one small deed can have an impact, not just on each of them but for their whole community. Indeed, this message speaks true to all the teams. Every week the girls brought joy and kindness to their activities. We are looking forward to celebrating all their accomplishments at the final banquet next week!

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OCA400K Game ON! An Appeal for Greatness

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Ohr Chadash Academy’s Annual Campaign Kicks Off This Chanukah By: Tobey Finkelstein

ecember is approaching, a time for giving. With it comes envelopes, phone calls, signs, social media posts, texts, and emails for year-end charitable gifts. It’s rough. Who wants to give to avoid feeling guilt? We want giving to feel like the fabulous act that it is: that our gift makes great things possible for those we care about. You will have that opportunity next week, when Ohr Chadash Academy reaches out for their 2018 annual campaign. What does your gift do? What does it look like? It’s the puppets, tablets, electives, and special programs that excite our students about what they’re learning in school each day. It’s a student flying across the stage in an OCA theatrical production, colorful paper mache sculptures at an

OCA Art Show Student Board 2017-18.jpg Creative classrooms.JPG

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Brian Sacks Mortgage Loan Originator • NMLS #225050 Oﬃce: 443.471.8557 • Cell: 443.324.8424 bsacks@homebridge.com Apply Online: HomeBridge.com/BrianSacks Are You Renting? View the Renter Secrets Report Here: www.rentersecrets.com HomeBridge Financial Services, Inc.; Corporate NMLS ID #6521 (www.nmlsconsumeraccess.org); 194 Wood Avenue South, 9th Floor, Iselin, NJ 08830; (866) 933-6342. District of Columbia Mortgage Dual Authority License #MLB6521; FL Mortgage Lender Servicer License #MLD1222; MD Mortgage Lender License #12402; Licensed by the NJ Dept. of Banking and Insurance; PA Mortgage Lender License #20394. This is not an oﬀer for extension of credit or a commitment to lend. 06/2017 Rev.05.23.18 (0518-2409) LR 2018-352c

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OCA art show, and touchdowns on the field with the Coppermine gym coaches. It looks like support services for kids who learn differently. It’s helping our friends with tuition assistance as they’re building their careers and families. OCA recognizes that frontal teaching and lecturing for hours no longer reach our students. Instead of dismissing the challenge, we embrace it. Both general and Judaics classes include technology and hands-on learning to engage students - like building a 3-D printer, AlephBeta Academy and TorahLive videos, streaming connections with Israeli classrooms, and Parsha though STEAMM (that integrates parsha lessons with science, tech, engineering, art, math, and mindfulness) in preschool. OCA recognizes that kids are capable of helping others experience greatness NOW! They don’t need to wait until they are a grown up. OCA teachers create opportunities for our students to delve into

projects that are relevant and important. For example, the OCA first grade runs a Veterans Day assembly to spotlight the contribution of our soldiers. The classes collect items like new socks and energy bars for a platoon and send it from the OCA community - from Jewish kids, in a Jewish school. The students receive pictures and letters back and see how their actions matter - and make a unique kiddush Hashem. In the words of an OCA parent After last year’s campaign, we were blown away from a parent volunteer’s letter thanking the school. Here’s an excerpt: I have never been a part of something so much bigger than myself, and it is an honor to finally be that lucky. I never thought that I would feel so personally invested.... I feel incredibly blessed to be a part of this school. The way that teachers really truly feel for each and every child and want them to succeed. To be happy and contributing adults in society. Not worrying about the petty stuff. Only how each kid can reach their potential. I was amazed. I have never seen this before. I am so grateful to send our kids to the most exceptional school I have ever witnessed. I can officially say I am honored to be a part of it. A Gift to OCA: 300+ paths to greatness OCA, together with each of the day schools in Baltimore, knows that we are entrusted with a tremendously important and difficult avodat hakodesh: dedicating the youngest members of our community on their paths to finding THEIR avodat hakodesh, their greatness. OCA’s 300+ students learn that avodat hakodesh isn’t just one path, but many. OCA encourages its students to be themselves, to be active in the community, and to strive for THEIR best - to understand that their best is not the same as THE best or someone else’s best. In that way, we create a school where they continue to ask questions, try new things, make mistakes, help each other, and take on new challenges. Your gift this December helps Ohr Chadash fulfill its commitment to the community and to our students on the path to their own greatness. Donate at www.oca400k.com by Wednesday, Dec. 5 or call 410-999-2200.

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Women’s Institute Of Torah Seminary/Maalot Annual Career Day: Exploring Career Opportunities, Exploring You! By: Margie Pensak

n my day, girls mostly attended seminary after graduating high school because they were interested in entering the teaching field. Today, seminary is not only for prospective teachers. Every Temima, Devorah, and Chana goes to seminary and many of them have no clue as to what they want to do. Enter WITS/MAALOT’s annual Career Day, where WITS/MAALOT students, alumnae, and high school seniors are invited to explore a variety of triedand-true frum-female-friendly career opportunities. The event which took place on Sunday, November 4, is the brainchild of WITS/MAALOT Director of Development, Mrs. Ethel Fischer. WITS/MAALOT Menaheles Rebbetzin Ettie Rosenbaum introduced the program, sharing, “How lucky and fortunate are those women who are able to be stayat-home moms, but the reality of the world,

today, is that most women have to leave their homes to work and we do have to become expert jugglers because we still are the builders of our families and we want to keep our families as our priority.” Although Rebbetzin Rosenbaum encouraged the students to think about what profession will offer flexibility, parnasa, and a frum-friendly work environment, she emphasized a very important additional consideration. “There are a lot of challenges in the workplace—halachic and hashkafic—and they all need to be addressed,” noted Rebbetzin Rosenbaum, “but what we are here today to talk about is another aspect that many forget to consider and it is crucial. What profession should I consider that I would enjoy? What do I want to do?” Rebbetzin Rosenbaum stressed, “There are so many different opportunities out there. Pick something that you will love and enjoy. There is no doubt that if you are unhappy just a few hours a day, it is going

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to spill over and have a negative impact on your family…In Aishes Chayil, Shlomo Hamelech teaches us to use our talents, whatever and wherever they lay. You have to pick a profession that speaks to you, that you will enjoy. Whatever you do you must do it with integrity and be the best that you can be.” The program included panel discussions with working professionals focusing on specific career tracks. WITS/MAALOT Academic Dean Dr. Leslie Ginsparg Klein introduced the five moderators and 26 panel members—many of whom are WITS/MAALOT alumnae-in five career categories: Business & Technology; Education; Health & Medicine; Psychology; and, Rehab & Therapy. The attendees could decide which panel or panels to attend, and she encouraged the women and girls in attendance to experience all the concurrently running panels, to get a taste of careers they might have never considered. Just some of the fields represented at Career Day were: cybersecurity; bioengineering; intellectual property law; freelance sign language interpretation; behavior analysis; microbiology; cardiac sonography; school psychology; art therapy; certified child life specialist; and physician assistant. Some of the professionals are employed by prestigious institutions and companies, such as the Food & Drug Administration (FDA) and Carefirst/Blue Cross Blue Shield; others opened up their own businesses. Panelists discussed their work, their career paths, their pitfalls and challenges as a frum person, how they juggle their families with their work schedule and home responsibilities, and the type of personality one needs to be in their field. After the panels, participants had the opportunity to network and speak one-on-one with the panelists and other professionals in the field. A number of participants shared their rave reviews with me. WITS/MAALOT

student Sarah Aliza Tunick remarked, “I thought the panel this year was so eye-opening and interesting…I am even thinking about switching from what I thought I wanted to do in my career.” Another student, Avigail Afrah, mentioned, “I think it was really an enlightening experience. It was really nice to see how everyone on the panels really love their job and see both the bright and bad sides of all the fields that were available. I think it is really amazing that they have this program, because a lot of people don’t really know so much about what they are getting into, or what it is going to lead them into, and all the possibilities open to them.” Yocheved Soskil, a 12th grader at Bais Yaakov of Baltimore, commented, ““It helped me to understand a little bit more about the job fields I was interested in learning about and maybe going into. I was considering going into Speech before I came today and I now think I would like to go into it.” Dr. Beth Gordon, an internist who was the moderator for the “Health & Medicine” panel, said, “This is just a fabulous program…Mrs. Fischer has opened the horizons for frum women to have happy work experiences and broadened the field of options. It’s just tremendous and the students learn so much from it. It gives them so much more real practical openings in the work world.” Ms. Tehila Baalhaness, a two-year alumna of Maalot and a “Health & Medicine” panel member who is a Physician Assistant in the Internal Medicine department of Franklin Square Hospital, concluded, “I think a lot of frum young women have a lot of pressure to know what they want to do and to come out of school with a degree and get moving… They see jobs that frum women have done so they see it is possible and they see how it all fits together into one big lifestyle…They can see how these jobs play out on a day-to-day basis and how to get there. It makes it a lot easier.”

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The Lost Letters ‫„„יןין‬ƒ ‫ב‬ƒ ¿ ‫ֲחֲ ָחב ָבלל ַﬠַﬠלל„ּ¿ „ּ¿ ָ‡ָ ¿‡ב‬ Woe Woefor forthose thosewho whoare arelost lost (Sanhedrin (Sanhedrin111a) 111a) There There was was another another time time when when Rav Rav Shteinman’s Shteinman’s writings writings were werelost, lost,this thistime timetotoaafire. fire. One One day, day, Rebbetzin Rebbetzin Shteinman Shteinman smelled smelled smoke, smoke, and and she she hurried hurriedtotosee seewhere wherethe thefire firewas. was.To Toher hershock, shock,she shefound found Rav Rav Shteinman Shteinman burning burning some some letters. letters. When When she she asked asked what what he he was was doing, doing, he he answered answered that that these these were were letters letters ofof recommendation recommendationthat thathe hehad hadreceived receivedfrom fromthe theBrisker BriskerRav Rav zt”l zt”land andthe theSatmar SatmarRebbe Rebbezt”l. zt”l. “Why?” “Why?” she she cried cried out. out. “These “These are are precious, precious, rare rare letters! letters! Isn’t Isn’tititaashame shametotoburn burnthem?” them?” “They “They didn’t didn’t test test me me before before they they wrote wrote these these letters,” letters,” Rav RavShteinman Shteinmanexplained. explained.“I“Ididn’t didn’tdeserve deservethe theletters. letters.They They simply simply pitied pitied me me — — they they wanted wanted toto help help me me settle settle inin the the places placesIIwould wouldfind findmyself myselfin, in,and andthat’s that’swhy whythey theywrote wrotewhat what they theywrote. wrote.IIam amafraid afraidthat thatafter after120, 120,when whenmy mychildren childrenfind find these theseletters, letters,they theywill willmake makeaabig bigdeal dealabout aboutthem themand andwave wave them themaround aroundasasthough thoughthey theyare aregenuine. genuine.Then, Then,no noone onewill will be beable abletotodeny denythis. this.IIhave havetotoburn burnthe theletters letterstotoprevent preventthat that from fromhappening.” happening.” What Whatdid didthe theBrisker BriskerRav Ravreally reallythink thinkofofRav RavShteinman? Shteinman? Rav RavZeev ZeevEdelman Edelmanzt”l zt”lrelated relatedthat thateach eachtime timebefore beforeRav Rav Shteinman Shteinmanwould wouldcome cometotobe betested testedby bythe theBrisker BriskerRav, Rav,the the Rav Ravwould wouldsay, say,“The “Theiluy iluyAharon AharonLeib Leibisisgoing goingtotocome comesoon, soon, IIhave havetotoprepare preparewell.” well.” Another time, he said, “Rav Aharon Leib is a talmid Another time, he said, “Rav Aharon Leib is a talmid chacham. chacham.He’s He’smy mytalmid.” talmid.”

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Rav Shteinman. Shteinman.usua Atlly the bottom wou eat. for wou for e e and and s, hom s, with hom with at wine time cup of wine ing at bit of ush cup three time wait waiting Kiddush salt three was in salt drink aa bit the Kidd fill the then dip then drink dip itit in ld ld fill of signature of of the the page page the the was signature of and wou and wou rding n rding the n fish fish of of acco inma acco inma end the some Shte since the end it, since Rav taste some Rav Shte At the to it, ld taste soup.. At would waterr to He He wou of wate of fleishigig soup Rav bit of Rav Chaim Chaim Ozer Ozer Grodzensky Grodzensky bute of the fleish orderr In orde add aa bit Attribute from the and add fruit.. In the Attri fish from ed fruit wine wine and the fish olizess the cooked rate the of cook symbolize separate ert of of to to sepa dessert wine symb the bute of appeared Attribute alah, wine appearedas aswell. well. recitee the servedd aa dess ld recit the Attri Kabbalah, be serve to would ld be to Kabb olizess the he wou would he wou symbolize ions, he meal opinions, sents meal,, he waterr symb hic hic opin repre hako represents hakol”l” whilee wate halac halac “She “She wine wine e ce, whil all e all the the Justi recit Justice, recit date date into into and mmo waterr fruit and accommo ng wate to to acco When saw fresh fruit mixing When Rav Rav Shteinman ShteinmanMerc sawy,y,the the and and mixi on aa fresh eitz” on Merc “Ha’eitz” of “Ha’ ment.t. ing of bless judgmen blessing the judg whilee gg the excitement by the lu” whil excitement engendered engenderedswee bytenin the akol’ tenin echu echulu” ‘Shehakol’ ee‘Sheh swee “Vay “Vay of recit of recit I r. I r. kim kim long suga long suga on pesu on ush. week the pesu “All “Allweek Kiddush. say the “but ofKidd ld say semichah, ripped in, “but ingof semichah, he he took took itit and andHe ripped wou would explain, blessing He ld expla thebless would forthe he wou sitfor y,” he thensit ldthen honey,” at on wou on hone would meal at and itit to Rav ing, to shreds. shreds. “The “The Brisker Brisker Rav ing,and stand duringg aa meal stand ing, bos, durin blessing, Shabbos, to the the bless on on Shab ng preferr to pleti pleting d, II prefe gave me in com gave me me this this to to me in of the nhelp served, n com Upo wine Upohelp breadd isis serve the wine whic whichh brea since most most of sugar,r, since drink ld on suga ld drink ing on wou wou Switzerland,” said. “He didn’t for Switzerland,”he hehe said. “He didn’t bless he blessing years the years,, for the e e later later yy isis recit recit his his hone hone In that cup. In the cup. in drink ernedd that in the mean ld drink concerne meanwhat whathe hewrote.” wrote.” would am he am conc he wou I I h, h, .” .” healt meal healt meal of of the ns of the reaso reasons part of ideredd part ol. cons considere alcohol. sing out alcoh ld sing without would he wou wine wine with meal,, he was aa the meal ng the yim was Duri During yadayim uchahh who as yada “Menucha netilas se who and “Men those of His His netil fear of desh”” and are tho Mekadesh pure fear re are In of pure “Kol “Kol Meka The There us.” In rationn of Yedidus.” onstratio cientt ten “Mahh Yedid dem demonst or “Ma sufficien moisten ld mois chah”” or would ld he wou Vesim Vesimchah that that itit isis suffi would he he wou First,, he eve eve on en. First on beli beli ther, secti ther, Heav secti Heaven. y y toge se toge se ever cau them to cau and rub them almo almostst ever ns and not to and rub nations son not handss and explanatio his wash person his hand ld wash add expla for would for aa per and add he wou m stop stop and custom when he hat isis thecusto (“W that when (“What ld hadthe so so that also would ers alsohad ers rr wou He He oth oth wate ts. wate ts. to to the men the men m the m com com yim har har ah the yadayim seudah as yada the out netil netilas with everyy seud but without but the at ever ), ), ee at hand hand …” …” e e recit recit you you heim entir to heim entir to to to “Les his ful he chim:: “Les touc hate touchh his hateful Zevachim Then,, he in Zeva havee areas.. Then nah in dry areas also hav Mish ach.” Mishnah any dry nizbach.” you also ng any vachnizb leavi that you since,, leaving hazevach well, since rimhaze trut devarim truthh isis that hand ah handss well, ahdeva d his d his shish shish aa goo dry goo dry s ld s bled ld bled do do wou hand wou resem vely the hand table resem actively hah, the to acti his table halachah, ed, his try to to halac Inde to Indeed, to try rding to acco prior according sses dry prior dnesses kindne pletelyly dry complete be com ei’ach.. form kin to be mizb perform mizbei’ach hold have have to ld hold and and per would He wou yim. He yadayim. as yada ers. ers. in netilas ll in oth oth to to netil towe for towe for a a with with cup 130 130 ing cup washing right the the wash his right wash his and wash hand and left hand his his left

se Wise the Wi of the rds of Wo Words

From From Rav Rav Shteinman’s Shteinman’s will: will: “I“I request request that that II not not be be referred referred to to by by the the title title ‘tzaddik’ ‘tzaddik’ or or ‘yerei ‘yerei Shamayim,’ Shamayim,’ so so that thatIInot notbe bedisgraced disgracedasasaaresult resultininthe theWorld WorldofofTruth.” Truth.”

nce ference confere at aa con mann at einma Shtein Rav Rav Sht hen “When chim:: “W hanchim mechan for for mec ld, ld, chi chi a a ng ng cati educati eonee isis edu som someon ng cating educati he isis edu as ifif he feel as mustst feel he he mu ren ren.”.” hild hild ndc ndc gra gra own his his own

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The Theship shipmade madeits itsway waytotoEretz EretzYisrael Yisraelcarrying carryingpriceless priceless cargo. cargo.In Inthe theship’s ship’shold, hold,alongside alongsidegiant giantshipping shippingcontainers, containers, sat satseveral severalsmall smallboxes. boxes.These Theseboxes boxescarried carriedthe thebelongings belongings ofof Rav Rav Shteinman Shteinman that that remained remained inin Switzerland Switzerland after after he he moved movedtotoEretz EretzYisrael. Yisrael. He Hehad hadnot notbeen beenable abletototake takeall allhis hisbelongings belongingswith withhim him when whenhe heleft, left,so soRav RavMoshe MosheSoloveitchik Soloveitchiksaw sawtotoititthat thatthese these items items were were later later shipped shipped toto him. him. What What was was inin the the boxes? boxes? The The most most precious precious cargo cargo ofof all: all: notebooks notebooks containing containing his his chiddushei chiddusheiTorah Torahfrom fromthe thegood gooddays daysininBrisk Briskand andfrom from the the war war years; years; sefarim; sefarim; and and letters letters written written toto him him by byRav RavSimchah SimchahZelig ZeligRieger, Rieger,the thedayan dayanofofBrisk, Brisk, whose whosehome homeRav RavShteinman Shteinmanhad hadfrequented frequentedasasaa child childand andfrom fromwhom whomhe hehad hadheard heardmany manyhalachic halachic rulings rulings and and Torah Torah insights. insights. Rav Rav Shteinman Shteinman had had consulted consulted with with Rav Rav Simchah Simchah Zelig Zelig regularly, regularly, atat every every juncture, juncture, and and had had conducted conducted himself himself according accordingtotohis hisrulings. rulings. As As the the ship ship traversed traversed the the waves, waves, its its valuable valuable cargo cargo inched inchedcloser closerand andcloser closertotothe theport portofofJaffa, Jaffa,where whereititwould would be beunloaded. unloaded. But Butalas! alas!As Asthe theship shipapproached approachedthe theshore, shore,the theEgyptians Egyptians bombed bombedit.it.There Therewas wasaaterrible terribleexplosion, explosion,and andthe theship shipsank. sank. The Theprecious preciousboxes boxeswere werelost lostininthe thedepths depthsofofthe thesea, sea,never never totoreach reachtheir theirowner. owner. How Howmelancholy melancholywas wasRav RavShteinman Shteinmanover overthe theirreplaceable irreplaceable loss…. loss….

with with

con n aa con Rav him,, Rav to him I nsom closee to eonee clos someon namee the nam in the said,, in ee said

Around the Community

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Baltimore Mayor Names New Police Commissioner By: Staff Reporter BaltimoreJewishLife.com/Jeff Cohn

altimore Mayor Catherine Pugh has selected Fort Worth, Texas, Police Chief Joel Fitzgerald as the city’s next police commissioner. Pugh called Fitzgerald the “best choice to lead Baltimore City’s crime fight ... he understands the Consent Decree, need for reform, training and community engagement.” Fitzgerald’s name surfaced a month ago when he was on the finalist list. His name became public just a couple of hours after the mayor told the I-Team in an interview that she was looking for an outsider to lead the BPD. Details of the contract between the city and Fitzgerald are not yet known. Fort Worth police sent a statement

to 11 News, saying, “The city manager has been notified that Chief Joel Fitzgerald is the final candidate for the Baltimore police commissioner position. Chief Fitzgerald is currently in discussions with city officials in Baltimore. At this time, Chief Fitzgerald has not submitted a formal letter of resignation.” Fitzgerald, 47, has led the Fort Worth Police Department since 2015. Fort Worth is a larger city than Baltimore, but its police force is smaller, with 1,700 sworn officers and 500 civilians. Fitzgerald started his career in the Philadelphia Police Department before becoming chief in a small Texas department in 2009. He also served as chief of police in Allentown, Pennsylvania, in 2013. Fitzgerald’s resume includes leadership programs through the FBI and Harvard.

Joel Fitzgerald

Photo Credit - Fort Worth Police Department

Baltimore City Lodge No. 3 President Mike Mancuso tweeted a statement, saying, “Along with the citizens of Baltimore, our membership learned of the appointment of Chief Joel Fitzgerald as our new police commissioner through local media accounts late this afternoon. We were not asked to be a part of the search for this important position and as a result, know only as much about Chief Fitzgerald as can be found via a web search. As such, we cannot speak to his appointment; however, myself and members of our FOP

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leadership intend to perform our own due diligence when we travel to Fort Worth, Allentown, and Philadelphia over the next week to meet with union officials, and other law enforcement officers, in each of these cities.” Fitzgerald would be the fourth city Police Commissioner in a year. Former Commissioner Kevin Davis, now an occasional guest host on WBAL Newsradio 1090 and FM 101.5, was fired back in January of this year when Mayor Pugh cited a bigger push to reduce city violence. Shortly after Davis was fired, Pugh appointed Darryl De Sousa, a 30-year veteran of the department, to be next commissioner. However, three months into the job, De Sousa resigned amid charges that he did not file federal tax returns. In October, Interim Commissioner Gary Tuggle withdrew his application to become the next commissioner.

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By: Racheli Epstein, Chai Lifeline Volunteer

s our country celebrated Veterans Day, honoring the soldiers who defend our country, Alex, a Chai Lifeline Mid-Atlantic warrior, was busy on a battlefield of her own. Upon finishing her chemotherapy, Chai Lifeline volunteers asked Alex how she would like to celebrate. The

decision was not a difficult one for her; the date was, Alex, her three brothers, and two Chai Lifeline volunteers were going to go paintballing. At Sportsland Paintball, the members of Team Alex Corps, were given their guns loaded with paintballs, and they marched onto the battlefield. In the Chai Lifeline Mid-Atlantic Region, nothing is taken lightly, so the games became more and more competitive and fun as time went on. After running around and shooting each oth-

er for hours, Team Alex laid their guns to rest and wrapped up for the day. As they were getting ready to leave, the volunteers asked Alex, “Why was paintballing the activity you chose to

celebrate for the end of chemotherapy?”. Alex replied, explaining to the volunteers that during chemotherapy, her brothers had gone paintballing, and she really wanted to go with them. Due to her port used for chemotherapy, Alex was not allowed to go because it could have been hit. Now that Alex has finished chemotherapy and her port has been removed, Alex was finally able to go paintballing and prove to herself and others that she is a true veteran.

Bloomberg Donates ‘Unprecedented’ $1.8B To Johns Hopkins By: AP BaltimoreJewishLife.com/Jeff Cohn

ormer New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg announced Sunday he’s donating $1.8 billion to his alma mater, Johns Hopkins University, to boost financial aid for low- and middle-in-

come students. The Baltimore university said the contribution — the largest ever to any education institution in the U.S. — will allow Johns Hopkins to eliminate student loans in financial aid packages starting next fall. The university will instead offer scholarships that don’t have to be repaid.

University President Ronald Daniels said Bloomberg’s contribution will also let the institution permanently commit to “need-blind admissions,” or the principle of admitting the highest-achieving students, regardless of their ability to pay for their education. “Hopkins has received a gift that is unprecedented and transformative,” he said in a statement, noting the prestigious school was founded in 1876 by a $7 million gift from Baltimore merchant Johns Hopkins that was, similarly, the largest gift of its kind at the time. By way of comparison, the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation launched

the Gates Millennium Scholars program in 1999 with a $1 billion commitment over 20 years. The Chronicle of Higher Education listed it as the largest private donation to a higher-education institution in the U.S. earlier this month. Bloomberg said he expects the money will allow Hopkins to offer more generous scholarships and ease the debt burden for graduates. “America is at its best when we reward people based on the quality of their work, not the size of their pocketbook,” he said in a statement. “Denying students entry to a college based on their ability to pay undermines equal opportunity.” The 76-year-old founder of the global finances services and media company, Bloomberg L.P., is among the world’s richest people. He graduated from Hopkins in 1964, served as New York mayor from 2002 to 2013 and has for years weighed running for president — including in 2020.

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Rabbi Avrohom Leventhal We have found time and again that the core ingredients remain the same, even if requiring lengthier and more intense intervention: professional treatment and counseling, regular prodding and mentoring, and moral and material support. Who would you like to be for a day? This may sound corny, but I feel I have the best job in the world. I am doing meaningful work helping people every day, working with wonderful people that come to work happily with a deep desire to do chesed, and meet with community members and donors who strongly support our mission. One thing that might be nice, though, is to go back to a time before smartphones! What motivates you day in day out to give of yourself to others’ well being? Many factors motivate me; here is a more significant one. Our Rabbis teach us that to be healed, we should pray for the healing of others. With this in mind, I pray for all those who are in a good place- emotionally and financially- should never find themselves in crisis. And I pray for those in crisis, to sustain the willpower and bandwidth to reach independence. This motivation is strengthened by the many success stories of families and individuals whose lives have been dramatically changed for the better through their association with Lema’an Achai. Any last thoughts? To our supporters I thank you for having the insight and patience to “invest” your charity in the long-term goal of breaking the cycle of poverty. For many, the vision of a child with an empty soup

bowl motivates them to provide a “quick fix”. Smart Chesed looks to fill that bowl today while providing the tools for the family itself to keep on filling it in the future. Your support of Lema’an Achai allows us to help more people on the highest level of tzedaka and chesed. To our families: It takes a lot of guts and internal strength to come forward and say -- I need help. So I salute each and every person/family that does reach out to Lema’an Achai and declare that they want to help themselves to become independent. There is a well-known anecdote of a man who is stuck in a serious flood, so serious that a rescue boat comes to his house. He declines the offer and says I trust in Gd. The floods get worse and he escapes to a higher floor, and yet another boat comes and tells him to hop on and be saved. He again refuses and says I trust in Gd. The situation becomes even more critical and a helicopter flies low, ready to haul him in and again he refuses and says I trust in Gd. A few minutes later he drowns and finds himself in front of HKBH, he cries why didn’t you save me I have full faith in You? To which HKBH replied, I did -- I sent you 2 boats and a helicopter. Lema’an Achai families wisely choose to hop on the boat before it is too late. 40/7 39099 ,‫ רמת בית שמש‬,7/04 ‫נחל לכיש‬ Nachal Lachish, Ramat Beit Shemesh, Israel 972-2-999-1553 972-2-9992398 www.lemaanachai.org info@lemaanachai.org

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For a man who has been involved in Organizational Chesed since 1989, Rabbi Avrohom Leventhal’s declaring 5779‫תהא‬ ‫שנת עשייה טובה‬is significant and noteworthy. Rabbi Leventhal’s roots in communal tzedaka and chesed began here in Baltimore when he was involved in Ahavas Yisrael. What does it mean to him? What does it mean to Lema’an Achai Israel- the organization he has masterfully been running since 2006? To us, the average reader? We took a few minutes to hear from Baltimore native Rabbi Avrohom Leventhal . After many years as a TA rebbe, Rabbi Leventhal and family made aliyah in 2005. Who is your ‘chesed’ inspiration? My parents, they should be healthy and well. Even when times were financially difficult, they raised my siblings and I with the notion that it is fundamental to do for others. Their chesed, however, always

included elements of what I call today “Smart Chesed”. Sometimes it was to help with the notion of “paying it forward”. Other times, my parents would guide the recipients with the goal of helping them to help themselves. Another significant inspiration were the years that I was involved in Ahavas Yisrael of Baltimore. The dedication of the Ahavas Yisrael leadership and volunteers to the wellbeing of their neighbors motivated me to continue such work in Israel after making Aliyah. Your all time favorite Lema’an Achai success story? While there are countless success stories, there is one that stands out. Lema’an Achai works together with domestic violence shelters. After leaving the shelter we take over to help the (now) single mother acclimate back into society and to stand on her own. One courageous and determined woman left the shelter, entered our office and left with her own business, kids settled in school and a very active member of her community. Today this remarkable woman “gives back” in many ways. What are the common ingredients for successful rehabilitation? The first ingredient is the desire and determination of the family to change their current situation. From there we guide people how to better manage and provide for themselves. By instilling hope, by encouraging people to try new things, by sharing our experience and professional expertise, by advocating, and by simply being there with the consistent message: ‘you can do better and you’re worth it’!

NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

The Week In News

Airbnb: No “West Bank” Listings

According to Airbnb, if you want to vacation in certain parts of Israel, you’ll have to find a place to stay on another site. On Monday, the vacation rental operator announced it would no longer host listings in Israeli settlements

in the West Bank. The announcement immediately drew condemnation from Israeli leaders. Airbnb said in a statement posted on its website that after a reexamination of its policies, the company has “concluded that we should remove listings in Israeli settlements in the occupied West Bank that are at the core of the dispute between Israelis and Palestinians.” The decision was, according to the U.S.-based company, made after “considerable time” contemplating the topic. As a leader in the industry, Airbnb said it “must consider the impact we have and act responsibly,” adding that it had “struggled” over the move. The rule will go into effect in the coming days. In recent years, Airbnb has faced criticism from Palestinians for hosting Israeli listings in the West Bank that failed to mention the property was located on land claimed by the Palestinians. Senior Palestinian officials and a number of NGOs have urged Airbnb to join the internation-

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al movement boycotting settlement products or companies doing business in the West Bank. The Boycott Divestment Sanctions movement has claimed responsibility for pressuring some major companies to stop or alter operations in Israel or the West Bank, including carbonated drink maker SodaStream, French construction company Veolia, and international mobile phone giant Orange. Airbnb’s announcement this week drew immediate ire from the Israeli government as well as leaders in the West Bank area, who called on the company to reverse its new policy. Tourism Minister Yariv Levin urged Airbnb to walk back the “discriminatory” decision, saying in a statement that he had already instructed his office to draw up measures designed “to limit the company’s activity across the country.” Levin said he had also instructed his ministry to implement a special program to encourage tourism and accommodation in West Bank settlements. The mayor of the large settlement of Efrat, south of Jerusalem, said Airbnb’s decision was a capitulation to “extremists.” Oded Revivi added, “The decision does an injustice to Israelis living in [the West Bank], constitutes a surrender to extremists and is a mistake that distances peace.” Peace Now organization, a group against the Israeli West Bank settlements and a proponent of BDS, lauded Airbnb’s decision, saying the company was in line with the rest of the world in “distinguishing between sovereign Israel and the occupied territories.” “International companies are interested in doing business with the State of Israel, but are unwilling to accept the continued military control of millions of Palestinians,” the group said. “If the government really wants to eliminate BDS — then it will end the occupation.” Arvind Ganesan, business and human rights director at Human Rights Watch, said the group had lobbied Airbnb to drop the listings for years, and called on other companies to follow suit. “Airbnb’s decision to end its listings in Israeli settlements is an important recognition that such listings can’t square with its human rights responsibilities,” he said in a statement.

Early Elections Averted – For Now Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu retained his shaky coalition after the Jewish Home faction said that they would remain in the government, despite party head Naftali Bennett not being appointed defense minister.

Jewish Home leaders Bennett and Justice Minister Ayelet Shaked had demanded that Prime Minister Netanyahu nominate Bennett to replace Avigdor Liberman as defense minister. The duo vowed to leave the coalition if Netanyahu did not accede to their demands, which would have effectively toppled the government. A coalition needs at list 60 MKs to prevent the government from collapsing. Liberman’s departure meant that Netanyahu’s government hinged on the razor-sharp majority of 61 lawmakers. Had the Jewish Home pulled out, the coalition would have been left with only 55 Knesset members. However, Bennett and Shaked changed course and announced in a dramatic press conference on Monday that they would keep the government alive despite Prime Minister Netanyahu’s refusal to give the Defense Ministry to the Jewish Home. Despite heaping criticism on Netanyahu, who was blamed for “causing Israel to stop winning,” Bennett said that his Jewish Home party would stay on to continue its attempts at changing the direction of Israel’s defense establishment. “Something bad is happening on the inside, including during the last decade in Netanyahu’s governments – the State of Israel stopped winning,” Bennett said, adding that the IDF’s focus on following international law was hurting its ability to be victorious on the battlefield. “We impose constraints upon

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The Week In News constraints on our fighters, legal constraints and conceptual constraints. Our fighters are more afraid of the military prosecutor than of Yahya Sinwar,” Bennett alleged, referring to Gaza’s Hamas chief. The Israeli government had appeared to be on shaky ground after former Defense Minister Avigdor Liberman resigned from his position last Wednesday. Calling a recent ceasefire that Israel had signed with Hamas

“a capitulation to terror,” Liberman pulled his Yisrael Beytenu faction out of the government. Following Liberman’s announcement, Bennett demanded that he be appointed defense minister, something which Netanyahu refused to do. Elections appeared likely before the Jewish Home reneged on their ultimatum to topple the coalition. At present, the next round of elections is scheduled to be held November

2019.

IDF Special Forces Officer “Mem” Mourned An officer in a highly classified IDF special forces was killed last week after a deep-cover mission went

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awry in Gaza. Lieutenant Colonel “Mem,” whose real name cannot be written due to the classified nature of his unit, was leading his squad on a mission near the city of Khan Yunis in Gaza when he was accidently exposed at a Hamas checkpoint. “Mem” opened fire to protect his troops but died when he was hit during a shootout with Hamas gunmen. The unit killed senior Hamas commander Nour el-Deen Baraka, who was in charge of overseeing Hamas’ network of tunnels.

After the mission went awry, special operations units worked frantically to extract the operatives before they could be caught by the Hamas terror group. The exactification effort included a massive bombing campaign by the air force, which covered the escape of the trapped soldiers. Israeli Air Force helicopters killed seven Hamas gunmen during the escape, while an IDF captain was also moderately injured. Speaking fluent Arabic, the commandos had posed as Palestinians and were dressed in civilian clothes. Israel later bombed the specially-designed vehicle they had traveled in to ensure that the classified technology the troops used would not be recovered by Hamas. Israel forbade the media from mentioning the name of the fallen soldier, as well as the name of the unit he was in. Hamas shot over 500 rockets at Israel the following day in retaliation, killing a Palestinian day laborer and an Israeli woman. Sixty other Israelis were wounded as well. Hamas said that a preliminary investigation showed that the commandos were attempting to insert covert listening devices in the Gaza Strip, backing up Israeli claims that the soldiers had not intended to assassinate Baraka. “The Zionist enemy tried to achieve

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The Week In News a major security breakthrough. It apparently tried to install equipment and build something that would make it easy for it to kill, hack and abduct,” said Hamas’ deputy commander Khalil al-Hayya. The senior Hamas official added that the operation was intended to “make it easy for them to do anything. To make it easy to eavesdrop on all parts of the Palestinian people. It possibly could have made it easy for them to discover tunnels and other things.” Israeli defense officials stressed that the operation was not out of the ordinary and added that IDF Special Forces constantly operate behind enemy lines. Gaza’s Hamas head Yahya Sinwar said, however, that any future missions of the sort would cause his terror organization to rain missiles on Tel Aviv. “Our hands are on the trigger and our eyes are open,” Sinwar said at a Hamas victory rally. “Whoever tests Gaza will find only death and poison. Our missiles are more precise, have a

greater range and carry more explosives than in the past.”

U.S. Votes Against Resolution Opposing Israel in the Golan The United States broke its long-standing opposition to Israel’s hold on the Golan Heights when it voted against a UN resolution that condemned the Israeli presence on the strategic plateau. Signifying a dramatic shift in how the U.S. views Israel’s presence in the Golan, UN Ambassador Nikki Haley voted “No” on the annual resolution titled “The Occupied Syrian Golan.” The annual resolution, entitled “The Occupied Syrian Golan,” was scheduled for a vote on Friday, November 16. Israel had captured the mountain range from Syria during the Six Day

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War in 1967, after years of suffering aerial bombardments originating from the Golan. Initially holding onto the Golan in hopes of signing a peace deal with Syria, then-Prime Minister Menachem Begin ultimately annexed the territory in 1981.

sow terror,” said Israel’s UN Ambassador Danny Danon. Prime Minister Netanyahu added that “this important and just vote that is completely in keeping with my policy – Israel will always remain on the Golan Heights, and the Golan Heights will always remain in our hands.”

PA Police Chief Suspended for Helping IDF The United States, along with much of the rest of the international community, has consistently condemned Israel for retaining the territory until the groundbreaking vote on November 16. Haley said that the bloody Syrian civil war had caused the United States to reassess its traditional policy opposing Israel’s presence in the strategic territory. “In previous years, the United States has abstained from voting on this resolution. However, given the resolution’s anti-Israel bias, as well as the militarization of the Syrian Golan border, and a worsening humanitarian crisis, this year the United States has decided to vote no on the resolution,” said Haley. “The United States will no longer abstain when the United Nations engages in its useless annual vote on the Golan Heights,” she said. “If this resolution ever made sense, it surely does not today. The resolution is plainly biased against Israel.” Despite the United States’ decision to oppose the UN resolution, the declaration still passed 151 to 2, with 14 abstaining. The unprecedented vote to oppose the resolution was hailed by Israeli officials, who thanked the U.S. for “recognizing facts on the ground.” “The change in the American voting pattern is another testament to the strong cooperation between the two countries. I thank Ambassador Haley for her continued steadfastness with Israel and the truth. It is time for the world to distinguish between those who stabilize the region and those who

The commander of Hevron’s police force has been suspended after photos surfaced that appeared to show him assisting IDF soldiers change a tire. Palestinian Authority Police Chief Hazem Atallah confirmed to the Times of Israel that he had suspended Col. Ahmed Abu al-Rub and ordered another officer to conduct an investigation into the matter. Ahmed Abu al-Rub can be seen in the photos kneeling beside an IDF jeep that got stuck while on patrol in the Arab village of Yatta. While alRub is not seen assisting the soldiers, the picture was shared thousands of times on Palestinian social media, with many blasting him for helping the “occupation army.” Makhamra, a local Fatah official that had been with the police chief, confirmed that he had in fact helped the troops change the tire because the stalled jeep was blocking traffic. “On Sunday, we were undertaking an aid mission in Susya with several official and humanitarian bodies,” he told the Palestinian news agency Ma’an. “After we finished providing the aid, we tried to leave the area, but there was a vehicle belonging to the occupation army blocking the road.

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It then became clear to us that the vehicle’s tire had been damaged. So the soldiers asked us for equipment to change the tire and we gave them a tool. “Thereafter, the soldiers tried to change the tire, but they were unable to do so. Following a long wait, Col. Abu al-Rub approached the soldiers and offered to help. He then successfully helped them to replace the tire. After that, we left the place.” First established under the Oslo Accords in 1993, the Palestinian Authority’s police forces are tasked with combatting crime and lawlessness in Judea and Samaria. While the police cooperate with the IDF on a routine basis, there have also been policemen who have taken part in terror attacks.

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were from Jerusalem’s finest restaurants and included steaks and specially-prepared Chinese cuisine. Former Prime Minister’s Residence official Ezra Saidoff is also facing charges that he helped Netanyahu cover up the fraud by falsifying invoices and receipts. Under Israeli law, the prime minister and his family are only allowed to order meals up to 200 shekels a portion if there is no chef on hand. Sara Netanyahu had been indicted by Attorney General Avichai Mandelblit in June. The probe began in 2015 after the State Comptroller’s Office issued a damaging expose on the Netanyahu family’s high expenses for their personal residence. The case is not Sara Netanyahu’s only legal troubles. Reports say that she is a suspect in a mega-bribery probe known as “Case 4000,” which centers around claims that the prime minister pushed for the Bezeq telecom giant to receive special regulatory benefits in exchange for positive coverage by the Walla News online website. The highly trafficked-Walla News and Bezeq are both owned by businessman Shaul Elovitch.

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A fraud case involving Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s wife Sara will go to criminal arbitration. Sara Netanyahu is facing charges of fraud for spending more than $100,000 on exorbitant meals at the Prime Minister’s Residence despite having a paid chef. The arbitration proceedings will be headed by Jerusalem Magistrate Court Judge Mordechai Kaduri and will take place in conjunction with the criminal trial. The arbitration would force the Netanyahus to admit wrongdoing, something they have vehemently avoided doing until now. According to the indictment, Sara Netanyahu “took fraudulently from the state hundreds of prepared meals” between 2010 and 2013. The meals

The Palestinian Authority joined ten international conventions and the Universal Postal Union on Thursday at a ceremony at its Ramallah headquarters. The Universal Postal Union is an international shipping treaty that operates as part of the United Nations. In addition to the International Postal Union, the Palestinian Authority joined the Convention on the Nation-

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The Week In News ality of Married Women, Optional Protocol to the Convention on the Rights of the Child, Optional Protocol to the Convention on the Rights of Persons with Disabilities, and Optional Protocol to the Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination against Women. The PA also applied to the Basel Protocol on Liability and Compensation for Damage Resulting from Transboundary Movements of Hazardous Wastes and their Disposal, Vienna Convention of Road Traf-

fic, Protocol Concerning Countries or Territories at Present Occupied, Convention on Consent to Marriage, Minimum Age for Marriage and Registration of Marriages, Agreement Establishing the Common Fund for Commodities, and International Convention on the Arrest of Ships. The Palestinian Authority has been waging a form of diplomatic warfare against Israel by joining as many international treaties as it can. Its efforts became possible after the United Nations voted in Palestine as

a non-member state in 2012, which lets it join international treaties. While the PA cannot vote at the UN General Assembly, it can speak at meetings and ask international bodies to take action against Israel. Observers say that the PA’s decision to join a slew of international bodies and conventions is likely a means to pressure Israel. Recent negotiations with Abbas’ arch-rival Hamas over a long-term cease fire in Gaza has caused Abbas to feel irrelevant, leading him to pressure Israel

in international forums. Following the PA’s move to internationalize the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, the U.S. State Department said it was considering levying a series of sanctions in retaliation. “It has been the longstanding position of the United States that efforts by the Palestinians to join international entities are premature and counterproductive,” an official from the State Department told the Times of Israel. “The United States continues to make clear, both with the parties and with international partners, that the only realistic path forward is through direct negotiations aimed at achieving a comprehensive and lasting peace. We are currently reviewing possible consequences of the Palestinians’ recent actions,” the official said.

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Neo-Nazi Hate Not Free Speech A judge ruled last week that a hate campaign directed towards a Jewish real estate agent by Neo-Nazi Andrew Anglin does not fall under freedom of speech protections, enabling a lawsuit to move forward. “The Court has thoroughly considered his free speech arguments and finds that a decision for Anglin at this stage would, at minimum, be premature,” wrote U.S. District Court Judge Dana Christensen. Anglin, the publisher of the Nazi website The Daily Stormer, had filed a motion to dismiss the case before going to trial by claiming that the anti-Semitic campaign was protected speech. The case revolves around an incident that occurred in 2016. Jewish real estate agent Tanya Gersh, a resident of Whitefish, Montana, had been in contact with the mother of white nationalist Richard Spencer regarding the potential sale of her summer home in the area.

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The Week In News After the sale fell apart, Sherry Spencer published an essay in which she alleged that Gersh had pushed her to disavow her son. Daily Stormer publisher Andrew Anglin then launched an online harassment effort known as a “troll campaign” that targeted Gersh. “Tell them you are sickened by their Jew agenda to attack and harm the mother of someone whom they disagree with,” wrote Anglin, who flooded the neo-Nazi website with information relating to Gersh, including photos, phone numbers, and her address. “I’ve been told: ‘You really should have died in the Holocaust with the rest of your people.’ Sometimes, when I answered the phone, all I heard were gunshots,” recounted Gersh in an article for England’s The Guardian. “I’ve received emails, texts and voicemails threatening my life. I was told I would be driven to the brink of suicide. There were endless references to being thrown in the oven, being gassed. There were even suggestions: ‘Call her up, get her to take you on a real estate tour and get her alone.’” The Southern Poverty Law Center filed a lawsuit together with Gersh in 2017 against Anglin. The recent court ruling denying Anglin’s plea to have the lawsuit thrown out means that the case can now move forward.

U.S. Veteran a French Hero Retired Lt. Col. William Pollard was called a “true French hero” this week when he was awarded the French Legion of Honor from the French government during a special ceremony. The 100-year-old served in World War II and was being rewarded for bravery in battle. “You owe so much to America’s greatest generation,” Consul General of France Guillaume Lacroix said when he pinned the medal on Pollard. “The American people changed everything. ... Without this gentleman, my flag would not be flying. It’s as simple as that.”

the Korean War. Pollard Jr. said his father never spoke much about his war experience until 1994, during a trip to France to commemorate the 50th anniversary of the Normandy invasion.

In a written statement read by his son, Pollard said he was honored to receive the award, thanking his late wife and the soldiers he served with. “Today I am both happy and sad,” he said. “My thoughts today are with her and with my comrades from many years ago.” Pollard was 25 in 1944 when he landed on Omaha Beach, the code name for a portion of shoreline during the Allied invasion of German-occupied France. As he was one of the first soldiers to arrive, his job was to deploy concrete caissons that would form a temporary harbor to help soldiers rapidly load cargo onto the beach. Pollard’s son, William Pollard Jr., said his father helped rescue 14 soldiers from a caisson after it was hit by enemy fire. Pollard said his father and a sergeant got the men safely to shore, having to coax some soldiers who were frozen with fear at the prospect of jumping into the 40-feet-deep water. Kentucky Secretary of State Alison Lundergan Grimes, whose office assisted Pollard in receiving the award, noted his career included advancing into Germany with Gen. George Patton. She said his career included a scalp wound, which was later patched by a nurse. “You represent the best of Kentucky,” Grimes said. The Legion of Honor was founded in 1802 by French emperor Napoleon Bonaparte. Today, Guillaume said it only can be awarded by the country’s elected president. Pollard was born and raised in Lockport, Kentucky, a small town along the banks of the Kentucky River. He had an extensive military career, which also included running an orphanage in Korea near the end of

Bedazzled Bird

An animal rescue organization in Arizona is searching for the owner of a pigeon. This pigeon is no ordinary bird, though. She came bedecked in jewels, earning her the nickname the “rhinestone pigeon,” as she was wearing a flight suit with rhinestones when she was found. A woman discovered the bird on her back porch and brought her to the organization. Posting photos of the bird online, the rescue group hopes the owner will come to claim her. Well, they’ll either come to claim the bird or the jewels she’s wearing. In any case, you know what they say, the early bird catches the necklace – or was it worm?

A Ban on Do & Don’t Students do not be scared. We will not be using capital letters or the words “do” or “don’t” in this article. Just joking. We may use those words and we may capitalize other words, so you may want to take out your emotional support donkey before you read this. According to UK media reports, journalism professors at Leeds Trinity University in the UK have been

instructed not to use certain words when addressing students in case they frighten their sensitive souls. As such, the use of capital letters has been banned as well as the “overuse” of the words “do” and “don’t.” In an internal staff memo staff are told students’ “anxiety” can lead to academic failure. “Despite our best attempts to explain assessment tasks, any lack of clarity can generate anxiety and even discourage students from attempting the assessment at all,” it reads. “Generally, avoid using capital letters for emphasis and the overuse of ‘do’, and, especially, ‘DON’T.’”

It also urged staff to be “explicit about any inexplicitness” in assignment requirements and to be aware that “misconceptions or misunderstandings quickly spread” among students. “This can lead to further confusion and students may even then decide that the assessment is too difficult and not attempt it,” the statement reads. Lest we think that it’s just capital letters and do’s and don’ts that frighten students, back in September it was reported that The University of Manchester’s student union voted to ban clapping and cheering at certain events in order to avoid triggering those with anxiety or sensory issues. Instead, students were urged to use “jazz hands.” “It was argued that the loud noise of traditional clapping and whooping pose an issue to students with anxiety or sensory issues. BSL clapping — or, jazz hands — would be a more inclusive form of expression,” student newspaper the Mancunion reported. A clarification by Leeds Trinity University confirmed that the university did not ban capital letters; it just

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Puffy Politics

When it comes to peer pressure, children have it bad. Uniforms may help, but what if “all” the kids in school are wearing a certain headband or socks or coat? Doesn’t your kid want to fit in? School officials in Woodchurch High School in Wirral, England, feel for those kids. As such, the school recently sent home a letter to parents banning jackets and coats from Canada Goose, Moncler and Pyrenex, brands that charge exorbitant prices to keep people warm. The school said it’s part of its “poverty proofing” scheme. “As you are all aware,” the letter states, “from an email that was sent out yesterday, pupils will not be permitted to bring in Canadian (sic) Goose and Monclair (sic) coats after the [holiday] break. “The support from parents/carers has been overwhelmingly positive and we are very thankful for this. Some have also asked whether Pyrenex coats, which are also in a similar price range (with some also having real fur) will also be prohibited. I am writing to confirm that these brands will also be prohibited.” A spokesman for the school, which has 1,400 pupils, their policy has “always been to minimize uniform costs.” Most parents lauded the school’s decision to minimize peer pressure amongst teens. Wonder if a ban on crazy-expensive coats for kids in the Five Towns would ever work. Hmmm…let me think about it. Without Moncler coats, all these kids would have no coats to

wear. And it’s going to be a cold winter.

Ski Roof

If you’re looking for a place to ski where no one has gone before, consider Audemars Piguet Hotel des Horlogers in Switzerland. The new hotel, due to open in 2020, will offer guests the opportunity to ski down the hotel roof straight onto the ski trails below. The design will blend the top of the building with its snowy surroundings. Inside the hotel guests will have the opportunity to use the premise’s restaurants, spa and conference center. Next door will house a museum dedicated to Swiss watchmaker Audemars Piguet, whom the hotel is named after. “Being able to ski directly out of your hotel room into the landscape will give plenty of people a seamless and exciting way to explore their surroundings,” says architect Daniel Sundlin. “On the other hand, it will also give the local skiing community direct access to the hotel. “

Flipping a Coin Not a Game

After forgetting his coin in the locker room, referee David McNamara asked two captains to play

rock, paper, scissors to decide the kickoff before a Women’s Super League soccer game last month. But flipping the coin is no game – the league takes itself seriously – and so McNamara has been suspended. The incident took place ahead of Manchester City’s home game with Reading on October 26 and involved their England skipper Steph Houghton and visiting captain Kirsty Pearce. A coin toss to decide who kicks off is a requirement under the Laws of the Game but McNamara left his coin in the dressing room and allowed the captains to play rock, paper, scissors to determine kickoff and playing ends, the BBC reported. “The FA can confirm that referee David McNamara has been suspended for 21 days, starting from Monday 26 November, after accepting a charge of ‘not acting in the best interests of the game,’” a FA spokesman was quoted as saying. McNamara can fight his suspension, if he wishes.

Disgusting Food Museum

This museum is not for the faint of heart, nor for the light of stomach, or delicate of smell. In the Disgusting Food Museum, visitors to Sweden get to smell and taste what may be considered delicacies around the world but will turn stomachs in other places. Consider Anthony Bourdain on steroids and without any stops at a American burger joint along the way. The dead mouse wine from China has bodies of dead rodents floating on the bottom. The maggots in the cheese in another dish are white and energetic. And the sheep eyeball juice is red with a floating green eyeball on top. But according to Samuel West,

the curator of the museum, the most offensive dish on display is the Icelandic fermented shark. “It tastes like chewing on a urine-infested mattress,” he claims, and we’ll take his word for it. “It’s a fermented sort of rotten Icelandic shark. Anthony Bourdain, the late TV personality, called it the single most disgusting thing he’d ever eaten, and I totally agree with him.” West says that he decided to open the museum “to challenge [visitors’] notions of what is disgusting and what is delicious, and the aim is to get people to understand there is no objective measure of disgust,” West said. “For some, the revelation might be that ‘maybe insects aren’t as disgusting as I thought.’” It’s certainly a matter of taste. Some may enjoy the frog smoothies from Peru or Sweden’s “surstromming,” an infamously putrid fermented herring. Visitors are also introduced to “balut,” partially developed duck fetuses that are boiled inside the egg and eaten straight from the shell in the Philippines, as well as “casu marzu,” a Sardinian pecorino cheese infested by maggots. Vegemite from Australia is also one of the 80 items on display. Also included are items many Western visitors might not consider disgusting at all. Swedish visitors are surprised to find salty licorice, popular in Sweden but perceived as disgusting to many others. American foods on display include Jell-O salad, made of gelatin and typically fruit; canned pork brains with milk gravy; and root beer, a sweet soft drink which some say tastes like toothpaste. West said he has managed only to sample about half of the more exotic collected consumables. Asked if he ever vomited while preparing the exhibition, he said, “Every day.” Some of the delicacies are so smelly they are kept in glass jars. Additionally, the foods have to be changed regularly so they don’t rot. The exhibit will run until the end of January. Tickets to the museum double as barf bags; visitors have been known to use them when the smell and taste become too overwhelming. Should we say bon appetit?

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Torah Thought

Hugs and Kisses

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

By Rabbi Zvi Teichman

One of the greatest displays of affection towards those we feel closest to is an embracing hug and a gentle kiss. Whether a parent showing love to a child, a joyous reunion of friends, or the classic metaphor of affection of a groom towards his bride, which reflects the ultimate bond between the Jewish nation and Hashem, as so poignantly described in Shir HaShirim, a hug and a kiss conveys something very special in a relationship. In all of Torah there are only three episodes portraying this combined display of fondness.

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The first appears last week, when Lavan ‘warmly’ greets Yaakov, his prospective son in law. ‫וירץ לקראתו ויחבק לו וינשק לו (ברא־‬ )‫שית כט יג‬, he ran toward him, and embraced him, and kissed him. In this week’s portion an almost identical description is given when Esav, despite his hard feelings towards his ‘conniving’ sibling Yaakov, breaks down upon encountering him, in an unusual demonstration of love. ‫וירץ עשו לקראתו ויחבקהו ויפול על‬ )‫צוארו וישקהו ויבכו ( שם לב ד‬, Esav ran toward him, embraced him, fell upon his neck,and kissed him and they wept. The final exhibit of warmth through a hug and kiss is described when Yaakov Avinu, in his desire to bestow a blessing upon his beloved grandchildren, Efrayim and Menashe, asks Yosef to bring them near and proceeds to hug and kiss them. ‫ועיני ישראל כבדו מזקן לא יוכל לראות‬ ‫ויגש אתם אליו וישק להם ויחבק להם (שם‬ )‫מח י‬, Now Yisroel’s eyes were heavy with age, he could not see; so he

brought them near and he kissed them and hugged them. In contrasting these three occurrences there are several glaring disparities. By Lavan and Esav they are running eagerly to express their exploding emotion. In distinction, Yaakov calmly coaxes his grandchildren to come close to him before embracing them.

a display of oneness. In Halacha the process of '‫ 'השקה‬is employed when a body of drawn water, ‫שאובים‬, that is disqualified from serving as a liquid in a Mikva, ‘kisses’ a ‘kosher’ collection of forty seah of water, it becomes instantly purified, becoming one with qualified entity. A hug is not only a sign of unity, but more so of an embracing protection, as the verse describes the promise of Elisha to the Shunamite woman that she would conceive a child and be )‫חובקת בן (מלכים ב ד טז‬, embracing a child ‘securely’ in her arms.

What is there in the art of hugging and kissing that the Torah is teaching us?

Lavan, the paradigm of ‫תאוה‬, lust, sought to ‘embrace’ so as to consume rather than to protect, as Rashi there describes his intent to ‘feel’ for gems that might have been secured on Yaakov’s body. His ‘kiss’ was merely an effort to discover any jewels that might have been secreted in Yaakov’s mouth.

The Midrash )‫(ילקוט שמעוני רמז קלג‬ points out the similarity between the word ‫וישקהו‬, and he kissed him, and the word ‫וישכהו‬, and he bit him. This anomaly, the Midrash says, indicates Esav’s true desire to ‘bite’ rather than kiss Yaakov.

Lavan’s ‘protective’ embrace was intended to secure his personal agenda. The Torah therefore emphasizes first, ‫ויחבק לו‬, literally meaning; and he hugged ‘to him’, as opposed to Esav who ‫ויחבקהו‬, ‘hugged him’, indeed embracing Yaakov.

What is the deeper meaning behind this correlation between kissing and biting?

The objective was wealth, in Lavan’s case, not a relationship with Yaakov himself. The ensuing kiss was merely a deeper grasping for riches, without any desire for any sincere union with ‘Yaakov’.

In the first two incidents they initiate a hug then kiss afterward. Yaakov Avinu however firsts plants a kiss prior to his hugging them.

The Targum Yehonoson ben Uziel describes how Yaakov’s neck transformed into stone foiling the ‘vampire’ Esav and his intent to ‘suck out his blood’ (see Yalkut). That is the reason it states ‫ויבכו‬, and they both cried, in the plural, Esav in pain over his teeth and Yaakov over his neck! Why would Yaakov be in pain if Esav’s teeth never penetrated him? A kiss is a symbol of connection,

Esav in his moment of brotherly affection feels a connection to Yaakov, ‫ויחבקהו‬, and he embraces ‘him’. Esav the epitome of ‫קנאה‬, zeal for power and control, seeks to embrace his brother Yaakov under his patronizing ‘protection’. He too starts with a ‘shielding’ hug, for this is the power seekers claim. Esav’s ‘kiss’ of harmony, is tainted with his intent to stamp

Yaakov with his own identity. Esav sought to smother Yaakov with his love. The ‫נשיקה‬, the kiss, in this sense is similar to a ‫נשיכה‬, a bite which takes the entity within itself. Esav is ambivalent in that he feels an affinity but can’t disengage it from his own selfish goals. He is in pain, for Yaakov cannot exist as a part of him. His teeth are thus ‘blunted’. Yaakov too aches over this kiss that can only fall on a neck of stone. He longs for connection but it is not yet possible. Yaakov understands the science of hugging and kissing. It begins with respect for the one he kisses. The Seforno in describing the kiss Aharon placed on Moshe when he went to greet him in the desert, ‫וישק לו‬ '‫ 'כמנשק דבר קודש‬,)‫(שמות ד כז‬, as one who kisses a holy object. A kiss must represent an admiration and appreciation for the one we kiss. Only then can we proceed to place them under our sheltering embrace. The hug then is not one of expressing possession, but rather devotion to that precious entity we seek to protect. It must be contemplative and thoughtful and not merely an unleashing of frustrated personal emotion. When we hug and kiss those dear to us we must make sure it’s about our regard for them. We must treasure them like we would a article of ‘kedusha’, holiness. A healthy relationship is one where each side regards the other with appreciation for whom they are. Only then can we achieve true connection.

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Choosing the Best Credit Cards for your Business (Focus on Travel & Cash-Back)

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

By Pinny Akerman Partner at Get PEYD People often ask us - Which is the best credit card available? That’s like asking someone, what’s the best car? Well, it depends - for heavy commuting? for weekend fun? Hauling Cargo? Each business will have different needs, and that will determine which is the best card FOR YOU” There are a number of variables that can determine which credit card would be the best option for your business including your business category type, how you use your credit card, what kind of purchases are made each month along with your total spend, and whether you or someone in your business travels often. As such, there is no easy answer when it comes to determining which credit card product is best for you. Therefore, the best way to determine which card works best for you and your business is to provide a breakdown of the offers and credit card options currently available, and to list those that we feel are the best options and the reasons why. 1st Place - The Business Platinum® Card from American Express OPEN Similar to the personal Amex Platinum Card, the business version includes a few key elements that make it worthwhile for businesses and makes it unique in the credit card space. This card is ideal for small businesses with significant travel budgets. Here’s why: ● When you book flights and prepaid hotel stays through the Amex Travel Portal, you earn 5x Membership Rewards points per dollar spent. ● You also earn a 50% bonus — so effectively 1.5x points per dollar — on purchases of $5,000 or more, up to 1 million extra points per year. ● When you use points to book a flight through the Amex Travel Portal on your pre-selected — or business or first class flights on any airline — you’ll get 35% of your points back. ● The card includes $200 in airline fee credits each calendar year, essentially rebating part of the annual fee, is used correctly. (And because the airline fee credit is valid each calendar year, not cardmember year, you could qualify for the credit twice in your first 12 months of having the card). Additionally, the card offers a slew of other benefits, including access to more than 1,200 airport lounges, in-

cluding Priority Pass lounges, Delta Sky Clubs when you’re flying with the airline, and proprietary Amex Centurion Lounge locations. For this reason, it is our view that for business who have employees traveling often or those who consistently have purchases of over $5,000 the Amex Business Platinum Credit Card is the best option for you. 2nd Place - The Chase Ink Business Preferred Our second place for the best credit card for small businesses with significant travel needs is the Chase Ink Business Preferred Credit Card. That card earns valuable, flexible Ultimate Rewards points on your small business spending. These are the same points earned in the personal Chase Freedom and Sapphire cards. These points can be traded for cash back, transferred to frequent flyer and hotel loyalty partners, or used to purchase travel with a 25% bonus (or a 50% bonus if you move your points over to your Chase Sapphire Reserve Credit Card. The card also earns 3x points per dollar on the first $150,000 your business spends on combined purchases each cardmember year in several categories, including travel, shipping, internet/cable/phone, and advertising on social media sites or with search

engines, such as Google Ads. Purchases after you reach $150,000, or in any other category, earn 1x point per dollar. Among other benefits, the Ink Business Preferred offers cell phone protection. When you use the Ink Preferred to pay your cell phone bill, you’re covered for up to $600 for damage, loss, or theft of your cell phone — or your employees’ work-provided phones, if you provide them. You’re limited to three claims per rolling 12-month period, but this can save you a fortune. The cell phone insurance alone makes up for the $95 annual fee. 3rd Place – The Business Gold Rewards Card from American Express OPEN Our third place goes to the Business Gold Rewards Card from American Express. This can be the go-to for small-business expenses, especially since the card offers 3x points on expenses like Google advertising. With the $175 annual fee waived the first year, and plenty of great transfer options via the Membership Rewards program, this card might be the perfect option for small businesses who spend $100,000 in office and advertising expenses with travel needs. Those can be booked with the membership rewards points earned through the business spending. 4th Place – The Capital One Spark Cash for Business The Capital One Spark Cash earns unlimited 2% cash back on all purchases. No categories, no points values or conversions, no redemption minimums. Rewards won’t expire for the life of the account, and you can redeem any amount of cash back. The card has a $95 annual fee, waived the first year. At first glance, the Amex Blue Business Plus might

seem like a better option, since it earns 2x points and doesn’t have an annual fee. However, keep in mind that while 2x points may be more valuable than 2% cash if you redeem strategically for travel by transferring to partners, Membership Rewards points can’t be redeemed outright for cash. You can redeem them for a statement credit, but they’ll only be worth 0.6¢ each. That means that effectively, the Amex card only offers 1.2% “cash” back, compared to the no-strings-attached 2% from the Capital One Spark Cash. Finally, credit lines are often limited with Capital One credit cards, and businesses with significant spend may wish to go with the Chase or American Express options. Honorable Mention - The Blue Business Plus Credit Card from American Express This card usually doesn’t have a welcome offer, and that might be enough to turn many people away from it. However, it’s currently offering a limited-time bonus of 10,000 points, and despite the fact that the welcome bonus is not that significant, you’ll earn more through regular spending: the card offers 2x points on every dollar spent, on your first $50,000 in spending every year (after that, it’s 1x point). There’s also a 0% introductory APR on purchases and balance transfers for the first 15 months, and then a variable rate (currently 12.99%, 16.99% or 20.99%). While funding your startup with a credit card may not be the best idea, the introductory APR can help if you have a few larger purchases coming up and are still working to get cash flow regular. Best of all, the card has no annual fee. To learn more about your credit card options and for a free consultation, visit https://my.getpeyd.com/request-a-consultation

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

WHEN YOU THINK REWARDS MANAGEMENT israel

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

travel planning

Sunday

Kislev 10

Kislev 17

Kislev 24

Monday

Kislev 11

Kislev 18

Kislev 25

Tevet 2

Tevet 9

Mental Health Awareness

Bnos Yisroel Charidy Campaign

Kislev 26

Kislev 19

Kislev 12

Tuesday

6:15pm - 8pm

Tevet 10

Tevet 3

TA Chanuka Chagiga

5:30pm - 7:30pm @ Beth Tfiloh Auditorium

Family Chanukah Bingo

see Cover Page

Kislev 13

Kislev 27

Kislev 20

@ Beth Tfiloh

Tevet 11 Chai Lifeline Trivia Panoply 6:45pm - 10pm

Tevet 4

www.oca400k.com

OCA 400K Campaign

Wednesday

Friday

Kislev 15

4:28 PM

Kislev 22

8pm - 11pm

Kislev 16

5:28 PM

Kislev 23

Kislev 30

5:25 PM

Tevet 7

5:26 PM

5:29 PM

Bais Yaakov Middle School Production 8pm - 10pm

Tevet 14

WIT Melave Malka

Bais Yaakov mall night OCA Grandparents & Special Friends Day Middle School 8PM-11PM 5:26 PM

see page 39

The Baltimore Shabbos of Inspiration

4:28 PM

Tevet 13

4:25 PM

Tevet 6

4:24 PM

Kislev 29

4:25 PM

OCA Grandparents & Special Friends Day

10AM-12PM

Kislev/Tevet 5779

Kislev 28

Kislev 21

Kislev 14

Thursday

Suburban Chanukah

Tevet 12

Tevet 5

Next BJH Issue

Chagiga 6pm - 8pm @ Suburban

Saturday

2018 Community Calendar November December

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

TA Chanukas Habayis 10-11:30AM @4445 Old Court Rd see page 25

Chanukah Festival 2:30PM @Inner Habor

Tevet 1

see Back Cover Page

Tevet 8

10:00pm @ TBA

Lev Shlomo Concert: "This is Chanuka" 7:30pm -

The Fashion Shop Sale

7PM @Moses Montefiore Anshe Emunah see page 33

Ohel Moshe Siyum Hashas

10am-10pm @6303 Wirt Ave 8-9:30PM @Bnai Jacob Shaarei Zion see page 3

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

see page 15

Shidduch Center Educational Event 7pm-10pm

OCA Parlor Meeting

NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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Exceptional recently renovated 4BR/2.5BA home. Open concept floor plan. Spacious living room w/fireplace. Separate dining room w/doors leading to the screened porch. Designer kitchen w/stainless appliances, quartz counters, custom backsplash & island. Family room. Master bedroom suite w/renovated bath. Upper level has a huge bedroom w/2 walk-in closets (could be turned into 2 bedrooms) & full bath. Hardwood floors & tons of closets. Updates include kitchen, baths, doors, windows, roof, HVAC, hot water heater & much more!

Move right into this bright & spacious 4 bedroom, 3 bath rancher. Main level has a large living room, dining room, kitchen w/ island, den, master bedroom suite w/full bath, 2 additional bedrooms, full bath, mudroom & laundry area. Full partially finished lower level with family room, bedroom w/walkin closet & full bath, tons of storage space. Refinished hardwood floors & freshly painted throughout. Wrap around deck. Attached carport.

Move right into this lovely cape cod. Main level has sitting room; living room; dining room; beautiful updated kitchen with granite counters, island & breakfast bar, full bath & family room with doors to rear deck. Upper level has a large bedroom with walk-in closet, additional bedroom & renovated bath. Finished lower level has huge rec room, bedroom, 2 additional rooms that could be used as bedrooms, full bath & laundry area.

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Move right into this beautifully renovated 3BR/2.5BA porch front rancher. Gleaming hardwood floors on main level. New kitchen with granite counters & stainless appliances. Master bedroom suite with full bath. Lower level has a rec room, exercise room, .5 bath, laundry area and tons of storage space.

Bright & Spacious 2 Bedroom, 2 Bath Plus Den Unit in Full Service Building. Large Living Room. Separate Dining Room. Kitchen with Updated Appliances. Master Bedroom Suite with Dressing Area. Washer & Dryer in Unit.

Lovely 3BR/2.5BA home on quiet street. Main level features a living room, separate dining room, kitchen, bedroom, den which could be a bedroom and full bath. Upper level has 2 large bedrooms and full bath. Partially finished lower level has a huge rec room, powder room & laundry area. Hardwood floors. Beautiful yard. Property located in both City & County.

Charming 3BR/2.5BA cape cod on quiet street. Main level has a living room, dining room, modern eat-in kitchen, family room w/ fireplace, bedroom & full bath. Upper level has 2 spacious bedrooms with walk-in closets & bath. Lower level has a rec room & huge utility room with tons of storage space. Large rear deck & patio area.

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THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Kiruv

Reaching In By Reaching Out By Rabbi Steven Burg

Much has been bandied about regarding the health of the Kiruv movement and whether it is “dead.” Frankly, from where I sit at One Western Wall Plaza, I don’t know of a greater fallacy traveling around the Jewish World. At Aish HaTorah, we see over 10,000 people per month at the Dan Family Aish HaTorah World Center and over 1 million people online every month. Our Baal Teshuva Yeshiva saw over 600 young men cycle through in the last year. All this having been said, there is another rising issue in the Orthodox world that all of us must step up to solve. Week in and week out young men and young women from solid Orthodox families are turning up at what were ostensibly set up as Kiruv classes and seminars. They are yearning to learn about the basic foundations of Judaism that were somehow glossed over in their educational institutions. As one young women from a prestigious seminary said to me, “I know all the intricate laws of Borer. I’m just not sure that I believe in G-d.” The disconnect between observance and the Almighty is frightening. Many young Jews brought up in today’s world where we do not have to fight for our religiosity, are starting to take the beauty of Judaism for granted. There is a new generation of Jews that is culturally Orthodox. They are brought up to talk a certain way and dress a certain way but they are lacking a connection to the Almighty. The question before us is how can we stem this tide and reconnect these precious frum children to their Father in Heaven. The Rambam in the Mishne Torah discusses how idolatry became widespread in the world. He states that although the rejection of the Almighty

was wide spread, there were a few who knew the truth and were dedicated to HaShem such as Chanoch, Mesushelach, Noach, Shem and Ever. The world proceeded in this way until the pillar of the world, Avraham was born and made the Almighty relevant again. The Raavad immediately asks why the famous founders of the first Beis HaMedrash, Shem and Ever did not protest idolatry and break the idols as Avraham did. The Kesef Mishne gives what amounts to an explanation as to how Judaism was created. He says that Shem V’Ever taught the truth to a few who were close students of their Yeshiva. Avraham, on the other hand, chose to teach monotheism to the whole world. It is as if Judaism at its inception could have gone in two different directions. We could have stayed an insular people under the direction of Shem V’Ever and the lucky few who found their way into their Beis Medrash could continue to pass down the truth to a small selected group. It is clear that this is not the path that the Almighty desired as Avraham Avinu spread the knowledge of Hashem to the world at large. Outreach is not a passing fad that was created in the past few decades to round up some lost Jewish souls. Our entire religion was built on Avraham’s concept of Kiruv. It has been with us for 3000 years and will be a part of the Jewish soul forever. The question for us to understand is “Why?” Why was it so important for Judaism to be an outreach religion? Why is being a light unto the Nations, (and many times our own Nation), so important? There was a time in my career that I spent a lot of time lobbying. When you are in the capital wandering the

halls of power searching for the elected officials that you need to speak to, you become friendly with other lobbyists that ordinarily you would not have the chance to interact with. There was one time when I was sitting next to a lobbyist for the Mormon community waiting for a meeting to start. We started to discuss how children from each of our communities spent their post high school years. Before the start of university, the Mormons famously send all of their children on missions around the world to recruit converts. I asked the gentleman how successful were their missionaries, meaning how many people converted to Mormonism. His reply startled me. He said we have no idea. I asked him incredulously, you spend millions of dollars sending your adolescents out missionizing and you have no idea how successful they are? He said we don’t send them out for the converts. We send them out to strengthen their own faith. If you spend every day for two years knocking on doors and having to answer questions about your faith you become so much stronger. The ability of these young men and women to articulate what they believe after a mission is rock solid. It was then that it started to become clear why Judaism must be an outreach religion. Many would categorize Avraham as a “Kiruv failure” since none of the 100,000 people from Choron that he convinced to believe in the Almighty stayed “Jewish.” Yet, I would argue, that every time Avraham Avinu and Sorah Imainu had a conversation with someone about the splendor and grandeur of the Almighty they themselves became stronger. We are a strong Jewish Nation because of their outreach, not in spite of it.

The bottom line is that if Kiruv is dead then Judaism will die as well. The day that we are not passionate enough about the Almighty to want to share it with the world is a sad day for us all. I believe with all of my heart and soul that we must inculcate the next generation of Jewish children with a passion for Kiruv. We must invite Jews far from the Almighty to our tables so they can ask questions and our children must hear our answers. Our children must hear how much we love the Almighty. Our children must hear how He is with us in good times and bad. Our children must understand that Torah and Mitzvos are a means to an end. If at the end we don’t grow to love and come close to the Almighty then our Torah is for naught. Many of the Kiruv classes that were created to teach the basic tenets of Judaism must be taught in our educational institutions. Our children must know how to articulate their faith and love for the Almighty. They must all know that every Jew is a teacher at heart and every Jew must teach with their heart. I believe that as a Torah community we must cease having unproductive cynical conversations about whether Kiruv is “dead.” We have a job to do. We need to bring our brothers and sisters back to the Almighty. This is not just a job for Kiruv professionals. It is incumbent on all the members of the Jewish family to make sure the Almighty is reunited with ALL of his children. If we do this then rest assured the Almighty will bring us back to Him, rebuild His home on Har haBayis and send us Mashiach speedily in our days.

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Soft-Spoken. Hard-Hitting. Yes, it sounds like an oxymoron, but that is the only way to describe the incredible keynote speech by Caroline Glick at One Israel Fund’s 24th Annual Dinner this past Tuesday. As she is wont to do, Ms. Glick spoke forcefully and passionately about protecting Jewish lives, both in Israel and around the world, without raising her voice or causing a stir. The simple logic of her words resonated with the 400+ diverse dinner attendees who hailed from across the political and religious spectrum and across the globe. The backdrop of the Pittsburgh massacre gave import to her unapologetic message of Jewish strength and courage in the face of constant terror and anti-Semitism. She encapsulated her decades of expert experience on the ground in the Middle East, and echoed the clear mission statement that One Israel Fund operates by every day – building and securing the Heart-

land of our Nation. The speech was the highlight of a poignant evening which paid tribute to several outstanding individuals who devote their time and energy to

Israel and her people. Dr. Steven & Jacqui Herman of Englewood, NJ; Dr. Irwin & Donna Azman and Eli & Mila Burman of Baltimore, MD and David & Aurora Mosberg of Woodmere, all received awards for their exemplary devotion to One Israel Fund’s mission. The program included two emotional presentations to Miriam Holman a”h and Elisheva Kaplan a”h, neighbors and best friends who passed away this past year. Miriam was a devoted member of the One Israel Fund staff until she succumbed to a long illness at the age of 21. Elisheva, daughter of One Israel Fund’s cantor, Joel & Leah Kaplan, was murdered by a drunk driver, together with her chatan, Yisroel Leven a”h at age 20. Scott M. Feltman, executive vice president of One Israel Fund announced the organization would be building a new playground in the community of Yitzhar in the hills of Samaria in their memory.

Finally, the special Shomer Yisrael Award was bestowed upon Marc Provisor, the director of security projects, who has been One Israel Fund’s frontline fighter for more than a decade. His fearless love of Yesha (the Hebrew acronym for the communities of Judea, Samaria and what were once in Gush Katif) has earned him accolades far and wide and his advice is sought at the highest levels of Israel’s security apparatus. The eye-opening video presentation about Marc’s work shed light on the often under-appreciated group of heroes who ensure the safety and security of residents living in Israel’s most dangerous areas. The “master” emcee, Ben Brafman, expertly guided the program from welcoming the guests at the beginning of the program to the singing of Im Eshkacheich by Cantor Joel Kaplan at the conclusion and the cuisine presented by Main Event-Mauzone was over the top in variety, presentation and, of course, taste. To watch Marc’s video as well as all the award presentations, go to OneIsraelFund.org, or “Like” the One Israel Fund Facebook page.

The 18th Camel

As told by Rabbi Chaim Volozhin, a talmid of the Vilna Goan B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Told by Eli W. Schlossberg Machlokes is a very sad and unfortunate situation that may arise in families at times of Yerusha. Money is a bracha but can also be a curse. Over money, some families are torn apart and it is can be devastating to see siblings fighting and not speaking with each other. Total family disunity may come about as a result of inheritance issues. The following is a valuable mussar haskal I heard from Carmi Schwartz, a friend, and former Baltimorean. THE 18TH CAMEL There was a father who left 17 camels as an asset for his three sons. When the father passed away, his sons opened up the will. The will of the father stated that

the eldest son should get half of total camels while the middle son should be given one-third and the youngest son should be given one-ninth of the total camels. As it was not possible to divide 17 into half or by 3 or by 9, the three sons started to fight with each other. So, the three sons decided to go to a wise man. The wise man read the will patiently. The wise man, after giving due thought, brought one camel of his own and added it to 17. That increased the total to 18 camels. Then he read the will once again. Half of 18 = 9. So he gave the eldest son 9 camels

1/3rd of 18 = 6. So he gave the middle son 6 camels. 1/9th of 18 = 2. So he gave the youngest son 2 camels. Now add this up: 9 plus 6 plus 2 is 17 and this leaves one camel, which the wise man took back! Moral: The attitude of problem solving is to find the 18th camel i.e. the common ground. Once a person is able to find the 18th camel the issue is resolved. It is

difficult at times. However, to reach a solution, the first step is to believe that there is a solution. If we think that there is no solution, we won’t be able to reach any! The Mussar Haskal: as I see it! Clearly we see when it comes to Shalom Bayis, sometimes it pays to give in a little to make the necessary move to accomplish the goal of Shaalom. Hashem will reward those who make that Hishtadlus to create peace. Family unity is so important. The word Nosan Nun Tof Nun is a palindrome and back and forth it spells the same word. Thus when one gives tzedakah or gives something to create Shaalom, Hashem returns what has been given.

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TJH

You gotta be kidding Every year, Yankel and Moshe, who both had a fear of flying, would take the train down to Florida for the winter. One year, they met up for the train ride and Yankel only bought a ticket for the leg of the trip from New York to Baltimore. When the train got to the Baltimore stop, Yankel ran out and bought a ticket until Virginia, making it back onto the train in the nick of time, out of breath and sweaty. In Virginia, the same thing happened – Yankel ran out of the train and bought a ticket for the trip to North Carolina, making it back just in time for departure. This pattern continued on each leg of the trip. Finally, Moshe said to Yankel, “I don’t understand. Instead of running out and buying a separate ticket for each leg of the trip, why don’t you just buy a ticket for the whole trip from New York to Florida, as we always do?” Yankel replied, “You don’t understand, Moshe. My doctor told me that I have a weak heart and it could give way at any minute. Imagine if that happened and I bought a full ticket from New York to Florida!”

Well Visited 24/7 Wall Street recently put out a list of America’s most visited stores. Can you figure out the correct order of the top 15 stores which have the most visitors in the U.S.?

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Centerfold

See answer on opposite page

Shell Target Taco Bell McDonalds

Walmart 7-Eleven

Subway

CVS Pharmacy

The Home

Walgreens

Depot

Dollar Tree

Starbucks

Wendy’s

Lowe’s

Burger King

Riddle me

this?

Aliza and her mother Laura were on Central Avenue shopping when they decided to split up to save time. (They had to get back to the car before getting a ticket!) They agreed to meet back at the pizza store at 2:00 PM. Aliza realized several minutes later that she had forgotten her watch and asked a lady nearby for the correct time. The lady’s watch was five minutes fast, but she thought it was ten minutes slow. Laura also forgot her watch so she asked a passing gentleman for the time. The man’s watch was ten minutes slow, but he thought it was 15 minutes fast. Taking into account the errors in the watches, who arrived at the restaurant first and at what time did they arrive? See answer below on opposite page

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

There are really only 2 types! 9. Enter PIN

28. Back up to machine

1. Pull up to ATM

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12. Re-enter correct PIN

31. Get back in car

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13. Check balance

32. Put card in wallet

14. Look for envelope

33. Put receipt in checkbook

5. Drive away

15. Look in purse for pen

34. Enter deposits and withdrawals in checkbook

16. Make out deposit slip Type 2

17. Endorse checks

1. Pull up to ATM

18. Make deposit

2. Back up and pull forward to get closer

19. Study instructions

3. Shut off engine

20. Make cash withdrawal 21. Get in car

35. Clear area in purse for wallet and checkbook 36. Check makeup 37. Put car in reverse 38. Put car in drive

22. Check makeup

39. Drive away from machine

23. Look for keys

40. Drive 3 miles

6. Hunt for card in purse

24. Start car

41. Release parking brake

7. Insert card

25. Check makeup

8. Hunt in purse for grocery receipt with PIN written on it

26. Start pulling away

4. Put keys in purse 5. Get out of car because you’re too far from machine

NOVEMBER 22, 2018

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B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Answer to Well Visited: Most frequented stores, in order: 1. Walmart, 2. McDonalds, 3. Subway, 4. Starbucks, 5. Walgreens, 6. Target, 7. CVS Pharmacy, 8. Dollar Tree, 9. Taco Bell, 10. Burger King, 11. The Home Depot, 12. Shell, 13. Wendy’s, 14. Lowe’s, 15. 7-Eleven Answer to Riddle Me This: Aliza got there first at a quarter to two. She was told a time that was actually 15 minutes faster than the true time. Laura, however, arrived at twenty-five after two, as she was told a time that was 25 minutes slower than the true time.

Notable Quotes

NOVEMBER 22, 2018

“Say What?!”

Folks, get a life. There are more important things.

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- “Jeopardy!” host Alex Trebek, in a recent interview, talking about people panicking that he may retire soon

What bothers me is when contestants jump all over the board even after the Daily Doubles have been dealt with. Why are they doing that? They’re doing themselves a disservice. When the show’s writers construct categories, they do it so that there’s a flow in terms of difficulty, and if you jump to the bottom of the category you may get a clue that would be easier to understand if you’d begun at the top of the category and saw how the clues worked. I like there to be order on the show, but as the impartial host I accept disorder. - Ibid

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Former New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg pledged to donate $1.8 billion to Johns Hopkins University, setting a record for the largest ever donation to a college or university. Boy, was Bloomberg [upset] when the alumni society called him the very next day: “Hi. Would you like to make a donation?”

I had to play this morning before I came here… I will continue playing my numbers until this train runs out! - Robert Bailey, 67, of Harlem, at Resorts World Casino in Queens while claiming his $343.8 million winning ticket from the Oct. 27, 2018 Powerball, telling reporters that he still plays the lotto every day

- Seth Myers

I am pleased to announce that today’s lucky bird and guest of honor is named Peas, along with his alternate, named Carrots. The children will understand. The winner of this vote was conducted by a fair election on the White House website. Unfortunately, Carrots refused to concede and demanded a recount and we are still fighting. I will tell you we’ve come to a conclusion. Carrots, I’m sorry to tell you, the result did not change. – President Trump during the traditional Thanksgiving pardoning of a pair of turkeys

I found this in the salad – could you eat it? — Britain’s Queen Elizabeth writing to her chef on a note accompanying a slug, after she found it in her salad, according to the new book “Dinner at Buckingham Palace,” written by former royal servant Charles Oliver

I tried to remain calm and sat down and watch some shows I had on my DVR. I didn’t sleep the rest of the night. - Ibid., disclosing what he did once he realized at 11:30 p.m. that he won the Powerball

Amazon is not too big to fail. In fact, I predict one day Amazon will fail. Amazon will go bankrupt. If you look at large companies, their lifespans tend to be 30plus years, not a hundred-plus years… We have to try and delay that day for as long as possible. - Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos during a recent company meeting

MORE QUOTES

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

When do Jim Acosta’s 15 minutes of fame expire? Has there ever been anyone less deserving of the spotlight who has managed to hog it quite so thoroughly as CNN’s White House show horse? Most recently, on Nov. 7, Acosta gave President Trump a moral lecture in the form of a loaded “question” about why Trump called the migrant “caravan” an “invasion.” According to Acosta, it is not an invasion because the migrants were hundreds of miles away, and besides, the migrants aren’t going to be “climbing over walls and so on.” One week later, as we all know, members of the caravan (and of course it’s not really a “caravan”) were sitting astride the border wall and invading U.S. territory. So much for Acosta’s credibility. – Frank Miele, Real Clear Politics

This year people in New York are buying $200 designer turkeys. Who’s designing them, Dolche and Bubububana? - James Corden

These turkeys are raised in their natural habitat with plenty of space to roam around. Which means that they have a better quality of life than the people eating them in their tiny Manhattan apartments. – Ibid.

It was not a free and fair election. We had thousands of Georgians who were purged from the rolls wrongly…It was not fair to the thousands who were forced to wait in long lines because they were at polling place that’s were under-resourced, or worse, they had no polling places to go to because more than 300 had been closed. It was not fair to the thousands who had been put on hold with their registrations. And it was not fair to those who filled out absentee ballots, and – depending on the county you sent it to – it was either counted or not counted, assuming you received it in time. Brian Kemp oversaw for eight years the systemic dismantling of our democracy, and that meant there could not be free and fair elections in Georgia this year.

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

- Georgia Democrat Stacey Abrams who lost the governor’s race to Republican Brian Kemp, in an interview on NBC, refusing to accept the outcome of the election

Every time there is a thinning project out, who’s suing? With lawsuit after lawsuit by, yes, the radical environmental groups that would rather burn down the entire forest than, than cut a single tree or thin the forest. And it’s easy to find who, who is suing, and who promulgates these destructive policies. - Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke when asked about President Donald Trump’s comments that the radical environmentalists are to blame for the California wildfires

I used to love a Guinness. Every night I had a Guinness. In the winter, mom used to put the poker in the fire, get it right out, and then put it in the glass. And that was the iron and that done you good. That might have helped me a bit. - Irene Crump, of England, who along with her identical twin sister just turned 102, talking about the secrets to her longevity

If we work our [heads]s off to make sure that we take back all three chambers of Congress — uh, rather, all three chambers of government: the presidency, the Senate, and the House…. - Representative-elect Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (Democrat Socialist- Queens), who could use a quick crash course on what the three branches of government are, during a video conference with left-wing activists

New York City is going to start giving street carts letter grades. So if you see the letter A, B or C, that’s just the type of hepatitis you will get. – Jimmy Fallon

Ilhan believes in and supports the BDS movement. - Statement by Congresswomen-elect Ilhan Omar’s (D-Minn.) office, several days after Omar became the first Muslim woman elected to Congress, contradicting her statement during her campaign that she does not support BDS

MORE QUOTES

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B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

50 In an interview with Fox News Trump said that he’s planning his first visit to a war zone. People were glad to hear that until they realized that he was talking about Walmart on Black Friday. - Jimmy Fallon

I’m still considering it. I will not be intimidated. The measure of a person is how they get up when they are knocked down. -Trump-bashing lawyer Michael Avenatti telling USA Today that he is still considering a run for the presidency, even after his arrest on felony domestic violence charges

A man in Japan just spent $18,000 to marry a cartoon hologram. That explains why her side of the aisle didn’t have any friends...and his side didn’t either. - Jimmy Fallon

- Newsweek writer Nina Burleigh in a tweet

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OCTOBER 29, 2015 | The Jewish Home

Dating Dialogue

What Would You Do If… Moderated by Jennifer Mann, LCSW of The Navidaters

Dear Navidaters,

My wife has always been a strong woman and I guess, if I’m being honest, I’ve been a henpecked husband for my entire marriage. Somehow, it worked for me, otherwise I probably would have been out of here a long time ago. But I’m easygoing and can let things slide off my back and not react.

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

Our oldest daughter recently started dating. When the young men show up for the date, my wife feels she has to spend time with them, interrogating them to some degree and often making off-putting comments. In the past, I never paid an enormous amount of attention to what came out of her mouth, but now I’m suddenly taking notice of how truly offensive she can be. So far, there have been a few men who did not want to go out with our daughter a second time. I think our daughter is the greatest – though I’m sure I’m a little prejudiced – but I have to wonder whether these fine young men are running away because my wife is scaring them off. I think if I were a young man, coming into a strange home for the first date, I might get scared off. I’m not sure how to handle this. I’ve tried talking to my wife about toning it down a bit but she just laughs at me and tells me I don’t know what I’m talking about. I haven’t said anything to my daughter yet, but I wonder whether she is putting two and two together and considering the possibility that no one wants to get involved with my wife as a future mother-in-law. I know I should have stood up to her a long time ago – and I feel like it’s too late for me – but how do I protect our daughter and our other children who will eventually be in the same position?

Disclaimer: This column is not intended to diagnose or otherwise conclude resolutions to any questions.

Our intention is not to offer any definitive

conclusions to any particular question, rather offer areas of exploration for the author and reader. Due to the nature of the column receiving only a short snapshot of an issue, without the benefit of an actual discussion, the panel’s role is to offer a range of possibilities. We hope to open up meaningful dialogue and individual exploration.

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The Panel The Rebbetzin Rebbetzin Faigie Horowitz, M.S. ddressing both your marriage and communicating politely with young men who date your eldest daughter is a brave step. It is also an honest one. You are telling the panel that there is a deeper context to the immediate issue – your role in the marriage heretofore – and your strong desire to make some changes now that your children’s marriage prospects are at stake. Now you are motivated to work on your marriage, communicate with your wife, and work as a team. This is going to be real work for both of you. Your record of passivity and ineffective communication is going to be hard to change without investing a lot of time (and money) into therapy.

Even if your wife does not agree to see a professional, go ahead on your own. Learn to understand yourself, your patterns of response, why you accommodate, and how to be assertive. Keep your courage up; you will need it! In addition, besides understanding yourself and your role in the marriage, you are also going to have to figure out, together with the therapist, how to motivate your wife to conduct herself appropriately when a young man comes to the house. Spending a few minutes with parents is de rigueur but an interview and opinions are not. It’s a ritual to get acquainted. Since this is your first child in shidduchim, your wife may be concerned about your reputation as a family, as parents, as community members, etc. That may motivate her. Her friends and family members, and even your daughter, can clue her in to the need

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to navigate with discretion and dignity, both during the visits and in dealing with shidduchim in general. However, your interest goes beyond just getting her to “tone it down” during the pre-date pickup. You seem to want to improve your children’s future by working on your marriage and communication with your spouse. Get started and work on it. You are not the only parent whose loyalty to his/her children in shidduchim has motivated him/her to address deeper marital issues. It speaks well of your commitment to your children and your sense of responsibility. Use this motivation to keep yourself going through the expense and effort of serious work in therapy.

The Mother Sarah Schwartz Schreiber, P.A. ou are twenty-five years too late. For the last two decades you have been living in a lopsided relationship – serving as the weak, subservient foil to a strong, opinionated partner. You’ve been easygoing – perhaps enabling of this dysfunction – until now. It’s parsha time – aka shidduchim – where your family’s little secret may jeopardize your daughter’s future. You are not alone. Other families – e.g., where Dad is the shul bully or Mom is a hoarder or bro is an alcoholic – risk exposure and censure when their children start dating. Kudos to you for waking from your submissive slumber and seeking help for the benefit of your children. You have tried unsuccessfully (no surprise!) asking your wife to “tone it down” when the boys come a’courtin’. Your only recourse, then, is to confide in your daughter that you are aware that Mommy may come on a bit strong when meeting her dates and brainstorm how to keep Mom out of the picture at least for the initial few encounters. Some ideas: on date one your daughter greets Mr. Right at the door and makes a quick getaway or your

Your wife is like a subway graffiti “artist,” drawing a giant black mustache and black teeth on your daughter’s beautiful face.

daughter embarks from Aunt Bertha’s dining room where the guy meets only you, because Mom is away on a campaign tour or you take Mom to an AllYou-Can-Eat at the local Fresser’s Bar or you and Mom visit the local Shoprite for Can-Can specials. Choose one. Joking aside. The above options are merely Band-Aids – short term fixes for a larger issue that has been festering your entire married life. Now that you have identified the imbalance in your marriage (and the potential risks to your family’s future) I advise you to seek professional guidance. Only with the help of qualified therapist can you acquire the tools that will help you become more assertive and confident in your life and with your wife.

The Shadchan Michelle Mond ou are correct in all your concerns – your wife’s demeanor and comments are indeed scaring off prospective shidduchim! Unfortunately, your wife’s behavior has gone on for too long – it won’t be fixed in one day. As a shadchan, I’ve encountered multiple situations where a young man called off a shidduch after one date because the mother of a young woman came across as too strong and critical. This is a difficult predicament. It’s not too late to start attending

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therapy sessions with your wife to work on the communication issues between the two of you. In addition to improving your marriage, it will be healthy for your daughter to see her parents work on their marriage and witness your wife’s improvement. This is crucial: you need to ensure that she does not become the type of manipulative wife which she might have seen growing up! During this time, bring up and dedicate a nice chunk of time to the shidduchim topic and work on it actively. I don’t mean to sound like an alarmist, but the longer this persists, the more word on the street will spread about your wife’s phenomena. People will get wind of her reputation and will start to say no even before agreeing

to meet your daughter. You need to confront her strongly on the need to work on this issue, and there’s no time like the present. I sincerely wish you much hatzlacha!

The Single Tova Wein t seems you are realizing that you’ve done your entire family an injustice. Allowing and even enabling your wife to carry on the way she does is not a kindness to her or anyone else. Your lack of initiative to stand up to her – perhaps because it was the path of

Pulling It All Together

least resistance – has brought you to a meaningful moment in your life where now it is affecting your daughter in a major way. How sad. Clearly, you and your wife need couple therapy asap. But since your oldest daughter is already dating, nothing significant is likely to happen that will make her journey any less difficult and unfair. The cast is pretty much set for her. Hopefully, if you two are able to work hard together and, with the guidance of a professional, change how you interact with one another, your other children may be spared. But for your oldest daughter, she’s got a real problem to contend with. I suggest that the only option available for your daughter is to be picked up for her first few dates from locations that leave your wife out of the picture. Depending on your set-up, talk to your

Acknowledge the elephant in the room.

daughter about ways in which this can be orchestrated. I have no doubt that your daughter is well aware of what is happening but she has probably been too afraid to say anything to her mother, as your wife is clearly someone no one stands up to. Hopefully, some wonderful young man will have the opportunity to get to know your daughter and feel enough of a connection to her so that when he ultimately has to meet your wife he has enough positive feelings for your daughter to allow him to overlook your wife’s behavior. Honestly, some men won’t and some men will. And toward that end I say, mazel goes a long way!

The Navidaters Dating and Relationship Coaches and Therapists

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find it very commendable that you are being honest with yourself and want to protect your children. Maybe you could have spoken up sooner, or maybe speaking up would have been pointless and would have only caused discord in the home, I can’t say. Let’s deal with the here and now. Your eldest is dating and your wife’s interrogations and off-putting remarks are most likely the root of why your daughter isn’t getting the second date. Your wife is like a subway graffiti “artist,” drawing a giant black mustache and black teeth on your daughter’s beautiful face. Beneath the graffiti, you can see the beautiful, intelligent and worthy person in the picture…but that giant black mustache and teeth! My suggestion is that you find a marital therapist to work with – immediately. Hopefully it won’t come to this, but if you have to beg, bribe or throw a full-on man tantrum, you will do whatever it takes to get your wife to join you

in a session. “Honey, this is extremely important to me. So, what time works for you?” (If she won’t go with you, go alone. A lot of men would never consider going to therapy on their own but believe me when I tell you that once there, so many think, “This is incredible! How did I wait so long?” Your rav probably has a referral list of mental health professionals a mile long. My point is that this is accessible and doable.) One or two marital therapy sessions isn’t going to resolve issues that have built up over what may be half a lifetime, give or take. But this situation needs some new energy and a fresh set of eyes. In my very, very clinical opinion, your wife needs to be told to cool it; that what she thinks of as harmless behavior is indeed sabotaging her daughter’s dating. The professional will find a way to deliver this message

that hopefully will not antagonize your wife. It is my hope that you two will continue with marital work if you feel that you are unhappy and unheard in your marriage. But if for whatever reason marital issues can’t be addressed or resolved, hopefully your wife will be open to changing her ways as your children begin dating. Now, let me tell you what I have seen families do in situations similar to yours when getting the abrasive spouse/parent on board is an impossibility. You must speak with your daughter and acknowledge the elephant in the room. I have a hard time believing that your daughter doesn’t have strong feelings about this and her mother in general. Be a support for her. Letting her know that she can talk about this with you will probably feel wonderful for her and release a lot of her tension. Then, start brainstorming ways to keep Mom out of the picture. The panelists provided some wonderful suggestions. My last suggestion is to get your daughter into therapy, if she is open to it. As she dates, and G-d willing marries, she may need support and

guidance to find her way outside of the tutelage of her mother, as oftentimes mothers similar to your wife have a difficult time fostering their children’s healthy independence and allowing them to guiltlessly leave the nest. The reality is that you are in a less than ideal situation. Follow the suggestions, and reassess the situation one month from now. Break this down into small, manageable parts. Step one was reaching out for help through this column. A-plus! You’re already on your way! All the best, Jennifer

Esther Mann, LCSW and Jennifer Mann, LCSW are licensed psychotherapists and dating and relationship coaches working with individuals, couples and families in private practice in Hewlett, NY. To set up a consultation or to ask questions, please call 516.224.7779. Press 1 for Esther, 2 for Jennifer. Visit www.thenavidaters.com for more information. If you would like to submit a dating or relationship question to the panel anonymously, please email thenavidaters@gmail.com. You can follow The Navidaters on FB and Instagram for dating and relationship advice.

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Wishing you a Happy Chanukkah. associated.org

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Health & F tness

Lighten Up the Miracle of Chanukah

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

S22

By Aliza Beer MS, RD

hanukah is a time to celebrate the miracle of the oil and menorah with family and friends. Unfortunately, eight days of celebrations always include latkes and sufganiyot, in other words, foods heavy in carbs, oil, and sugar! Every party has to have them, and some people find themselves at 6-8 parties over the course of the holiday. How best to navigate through the Festival of Lights without diminishing the joy? Adhere to the following suggestions, and you will come through this chag maintaining your weight and good health. 1. Latkes, latkes, and more latkes: Traditionally, latkes are made with white potatoes and fried in lots of oil. Allow yourself one or two of the traditional, high-fat latkes over the course of the eight days. Consider introducing your family to an alternative, healthier option as well. Try making zucchini or cauliflower latkes instead. Take your bubby’s latke recipe and swap in zucchini or cauliflower instead of the potato. Fry them in Pam or very little olive oil and you’ve got yourself a healthy and filling side dish! Recently, cauliflower rice and zoodles have become all the rage, and for good reason. They mimic their pasta and rice counterparts, but

are carb–free, low in calories, and high in vitamins. 2. Time to Make the Doughnuts: It is actually better and healthier to eat a bagel than a doughnut. A doughnut is white flour that is deep fried and then a high-sugar, highfat, cream, ganache, lotus, caramel, chocolate, or custard is inserted into it and on top of it! A doughnut of this cal-

are attending a party that night, plan accordingly. Eat your breakfast and lunch and a couple of fruit snacks. Don’t skip a meal in anticipation of a heavy dinner. You will only come to the party starving and overeat. Try to find out in advance what the food selection consists of and offer to make or bring something if there are no healthy options. If you are uncomfort-

Set up a salad bar with various veggies, toppings, and low-fat dressings, and offer at least one fish option. iber can be upwards of 600800 calories. So what to do? How to resist? Allow yourself half of a doughnut at some point during the holiday. This will prevent you from feeling deprived. Eat it, enjoy it, and move on with your life. Or bake your own, not fried, and do it in mini muffin tins so they are small. Use no sugar-added jelly or melt some no sugar added chocolate chips. 3. Plan Ahead: If you know you

able with that strategy, then just make the best choice from your available options. You are never supposed to sit and starve. If there are only high-carb, high-fat options then take small portions of the least offending ones. If you are still hungry when you come home, have a light meal like veggie soup or eggs. 4. Exercise: It’s going to be an off week, so try to compensate by upping your exercise game

to work off the extra calories. Do some kind of cardio at least three times over the course of the week, for a minimum of 40 minutes. 5. The Hostess with the Mostest: If you are hosting the party, then provide healthy options for yourself and others that are trying to watch their weight and maintain good health. If the menu is dairy then include not only pasta and pizza – set up a salad bar with various veggies, toppings, and low-fat dressings, and offer at least one fish option. Fat-free frozen yogurt would be a nice addition to the mandatory doughnuts and cake. If the menu is fleishig, then offer grilled or baked chicken, not only breaded and fried options. Choose leaner cuts of meat and don’t drown your proteins in high sugar marinades! Try using herbs and spices to give them flavor. Sorbet or baked apples will make delicious dessert options. For both menus, roast or grill an assortment of veggies with Pam and spices – they are always a crowd favorite. Additionally, fresh fruit should always be a dessert option. Cont. on pg 60

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6. Drink Water: Drink 8 cups of water, seltzer, or flavored seltzer a day. At parties, opt for water or seltzer, and if none is available, then a clear diet soda or unsweetened tea should do. Avoid sugary juices, sodas, or mixed drinks.

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Chanukah should not produce

similar weight gains to Pesach or Sukkos, for it is a very different kind of holiday, but it does present with its own very specific set of challenges. These challenges can be overcome, or the negative effects at least diminished, with proper planning and a little self control. As I have said to many a patient: just because it’s there doesn’t mean you have to

eat it. By all means treat yourself, but not every day for eight days in a row! Teach yourself to be happy with savoring the taste of one cookie, not three or four. Utilizing the tools and tips I have set forth will help you traverse these eight sensational, joyous, light-filled days of Chanukah. Wishing all of my readers a frei-

lechen Chanukah! Aliza Beer is a registered dietician with a master’s degree in nutrition. She has a private practice in Cedarhurst, NY. Patients’ success has been featured on the Dr. Oz show. Aliza can be reached at alizabeer@gmail.com.

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Mental Health Corner

When Someone You Know Has Depression By Rabbi Azriel Hauptman When someone suffers from depression, the family or friends can be a tremendous resource for that person to turn to for emotional support. Very often, people do not know what to say or do for the depressed individual and end up avoiding the issue or dealing with it improperly. Obviously, every case is different, but here are some general pointers about the dos and don’ts of being a friend to a depressed individual. The Dos: • Educate yourself. Depression is an extremely difficult condition to comprehend if you have been fortunate to never have it yourself. The more you can learn about depression, the better you will be able to empathize with your friend.

• Listen. When your friend complains to you, it is usually unhelpful to try to explain to them that life is not so bad. Depressed individuals often feel invalidated and misunderstood when their friends try to “fix” them. Actually, just listening to your friend in a nonjudgmental way can be extremely helpful to your friend. • Express your unconditional support. You can be very helpful to your friend by simply telling them that you are there for him/her. • Maintain your friendship. Your friend will often not initiate reaching out to you. That is usually the result of the depression. Call up and maintain the relationship unconditionally even if your friend does not reciprocate. Offer to go out together as long as your friend does not feel

forced. • Offer assistance. Sometimes people with depression neglect their needs. If you feel that it would be appreciated, offer to take care of specific tasks. For example, if you see that the laundry is not getting done, gently offer to do the laundry. • Encourage treatment. If your friend is not seeking professional help, gently encourage him/her to pursue treatment. The Don’ts: • Do not invalidate their feelings. Do not tell your friend, “It is all in your head,” or, “Just snap out of it.” Depression is like living in a suffocating grey cloud with no end in sight. The suggestion that they are not experiencing something real is very counterproductive.

• Do not become impatient. It can be infuriating watching someone who looks fine and is nonetheless wallowing in their depression. Try your best to bear in mind that your friend is not doing this on purpose. • Do not use the “tough love” approach. Depression is a real illness, it is not a choice. Do not ignore suicidal gestures. Suicide is a real risk in depressed individuals. Seek out professional guidance to help you navigate the situation. This is a service of Relief Resources. Relief is an organization that provides mental health referrals, education, and support to the frum community. Rabbi Yisrael Slansky is director of the Baltimore branch of Relief. He can be contacted at 410-448-8356 or at yslansky@reliefhelp.org

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Meir Panim

personal relationships with those who walk through the door. “I immigrated to Israel from France 15 years ago,” Sophia stated, explaining that she lives alone and has no surviving family members. Sophia spoke about the importance of being treated with dignity at Meir Panim, explaining that “because the workers are so respectful, people who need food are not ashamed to come here to a soup kitchen.” Mimi Rozmaryn, Director of Global Development for Meir Panim, stated “Meir Panim clients are always telling us that they don’t know what they would do without our help. Our wish for the new year is for Meir Panim to be out of business –we hope that our clients find the safety net and employment they need.” For more information on Meir Panim, please visit meirpanimusa.org or call 888-404-3590.

Happy Chanukah FROM AMERICAN FRIENDS OF MEIR PANIM

Meir Panim works every day to alleviate the harmful effects of poverty on thousands of families across Israel through a network of Restaurant-Style Soup Kitchens, Meals-onWheels, After-School Youth Clubs, school lunch programs, and prepaid food card distribution.

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Arriving alone to Meir Panim’s Restaurant-Style Soup Kitchen in Jerusalem, Sophia quietly walked in and sat down at a table. Within seconds, a smiling volunteer came to bring her water and a hot meal – meat with stewed vegetables, chickpeas and potatoes. Meir Panim works to help the 1.8 million Israelis living in poverty through a network of Restaurant-Style Soup Kitchens, Meals-on-Wheels, After-School Youth Clubs, school lunch programs, and prepaid food card distribution. Many of the Restaurant-Style Soup Kitchen diners are elderly, like Sophia. Often their lunch at Meir Panim is their only social interaction of the day. Meir Panim staff and volunteers are inspired by the “Restaurant-Style” environment; they not only serve clients food like in a regular restaurant, but they also make a point to establish

NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Sophia’s Story: Meir Panim Brings Hope to Israel’s Hungry

Chanukah

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NOVEMBER 22, 2018

Fluffy Honey Cake

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

what you will need: 8 eggs- separated 2/3 cup sugar ½ cup oil 1 cup honey 1 ¾ cups Great Value Gluten-free All Purpose Flour ¾ tsp. baking soda ¾ tsp. cinnamon ½ tsp. salt Pinch of cloves

Mishpacha Magazine recently printed a recipe for Oma’s Delicious Honey Cake. This one is an adaptation of that recipe- adjusted to make it gluten-free. It freezes well, but in my house it never made it to the freezer!

preparation: 1. Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees. 2. Beat the egg whites until soft peaks form. 3. Add sugar slowly and beat until stiff. 4. Slowly add egg yolks. 5. Add oil, honey, and remaining ingredients. Mix all together until smooth and blended. 6. Pour into an oiled parchment-lined 9 x 13 inch baking pan. Bake for 45 minutes. 7. Cover loosely with aluminum foil and continue baking an additional 15 minutes or until a toothpick comes out clean. Enjoy!

The Jewish Home | OCTOBER 29, 2015

Your

Money

By Allan Rolnick, CPA

THE BALTIMORE JEWISH HOME

LeBron James Scoffs at These Taxes

NOVEMBER 22, 2018

able income,” and “auditors crawling up your you-know-what for a week and asking for every Staples receipt from the last three years.” The lane to the net can be even twistier on the corporate side. Multinational corporations have crafted strategies like the “double Irish with

board and call it good? It turns out that some governments are finding ways to do just that. In London, Treasury chief Phillip Hammond is proposing a “digital services tax” of 2% of gross revenue on U.S. companies like Google, Amazon, and Facebook. The new levy would

What if we could just bounce the ball off the backboard and call it good?

a Dutch sandwich” (yes, that’s really a thing) to shift income from high-tax countries like the U.S. (35%), to low-tax countries like Ireland (12.5%). Clever lawyers save their clients millions of dollars with these sorts of gyrations, which explains why they wear antique Swiss watches and drive pricey German sports cars. But what if we didn’t have to jump through all those hoops? What if we could just bounce the ball off the back-

raise £400 million per year, regardless of where those companies ultimately send their net to be taxed. The European Union and Spain have proposed similar taxes of 3%, and several more countries are eyeing that bandwagon. Those small percentages may not sound like much. But applying them over a broader base can quickly mean enormous revenue for those countries. Here in the U.S., several states impose revenue-based taxes instead of

traditional corporate income taxes. In Texas, businesses pay 1% of gross receipts over $1 million, or 0.575% over $10 million. In California, LLCs pay a fee of up to $11,790 depending on gross revenue. And in Ohio, businesses pay a flat Commercial Activity Tax of 0.26% on Ohio gross receipts over $1 million. Those amounts may look like small potatoes, but they add up fast. Plus, it’s easier for businesses to calculate revenue-based taxes and for auditors to verify them. The good news is that our oldschool income tax raised about half of our federal revenue last year. It would take a herculean effort to change that system, especially when Mitch McConnell and Chuck Schumer can’t even agree on naming a post office. And that means all your favorite tax breaks are still safe, at least for now. So make sure you have a plan so you’re not missing out on any free throws!

Allan J Rolnick is a CPA who has been in practice for over 30 years in Queens, NY. He welcomes your comments and can be reached at 718-896-8715 or at allanjrcpa@aol.com.

B A LT I M O R E J E W I S H H O M E . C O M

f you were coaching your kid’s basketball team, you wouldn’t win many games if you told them to aim for the backboard. Your opponents might love you, but there would be at least one dad in the stands screaming at you the entire time. So why have some tax collectors given up aiming for the hoop and settled for rebounds? At first glance, the tax code looks like 70,000+ pages of incomprehensible gobbledygook. (Sometimes you really can judge a book by its cover.) But scratch the surface hard enough and you’ll find a semblance of order. Add up total income from various sources. Subtract adjustments to gross income and standard or itemized deductions. Calculate the tax based on the remaining net income. Finally, subtract any available credits for doing things Washington is willing to subsidize, like having kids, sending them to college, or driving your kids to college in an electric car. Easy peasy, right? (Yeah, sure.) In practice, of course, it’s a lot harder, and leads to complications like “partnership capital account revaluations,” “tentative alternative minimum tax-

Experience makes a difference.

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410.581.1000

NOBODY SELLS MORE REAL ESTATE THAN RE/MAX.®

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