Forgiveness Buddy Session 1: Introduction

FORGIvENESS Buster’s Growing Grudge

Materials Book Corner

Arthur Character Cards: Buster, Binky Vocabulary List (optional)

Objective: Students explore the interactive comic with buddies to help them gain an understanding of what it means to let go of feeling angry, upset, or disappointed with someone who as hurt you or done something wrong. Bruchac, Joseph The First Strawberries Havill, Juanita Jamaica’s Blue Marker Jones, Rebecca C. Matthew and Tilly Marshalll, James George and Martha Mulcahy, William Zach Apologizes Rockliff, Mara The Grudge Keeper Udry, Janice May Let’s Be Enemies

20–45

minutes

FORGI v ENESS BIG B UDDY S ESSION 1: Introduction

Preview the story

Introduce the concept and main idea of the story. Tell students that the next story they will listen to and read with their Little Buddies is called Buster’s Growing Grudge. Ask students: Who knows what a grudge is? <pause for responses> A grudge is when you think badly of someone and are upset with them because you think they did something wrong to you. What do you think it means to “hold” onto a grudge? <pause for responses> It means you just can’t let go of your bad feelings about that person. Has that ever happened to you?

There are two main characters in this story: Buster and Binky. <Point to their Character Cards.> In the story, Binky does something to upset Buster. Buster can’t forgive Binky and develops a grudge against Binky. Buster needs to figure out how holding onto his grudge affects his feelings, his thoughts, his behavior, and the people around him. Tell students

they will be talking with their Little Buddies about why it’s sometimes hard to forgive someone and what can happen when you don’t forgive them.

Introduce and discuss: forgiveness

In Buster’s Growing Grudge students reflect on the concept of forgiveness as they explore what happens when Buster struggles to forgive his friend Binky. Introduce the topic of forgiveness by sharing real-life experiences you and your students have had with carrying around a grudge. This can help students begin to grasp the concept in a real-life context and give them practice talking about these issues when they meet their Little Buddies. After you share experiences, ask questions such as: Has anyone ever done something mean to you or hurt your feelings? This can make you feel angry, upset, and disappointed. If you can’t get over your bad feelings, it can be difficult to forgive that person, and you can develop a grudge against him or her.

What does it mean to forgive someone? <pause for responses> When you forgive someone, you stop feeling angry or disappointed. You might do this because someone has shown you that he or she is truly sorry or you might decide to forgive the person without getting an apology because you realize that getting rid of the angry feelings makes you feel better and it’s not worth it to stay angry anymore.

The following related issues are important aspects of understanding forgiveness, try to include these in your discussion on the topic: •Forgiving doesn’t have a time limit (it can happen quickly, or it can take a long time)

• Misunderstandings and perspective (sometimes a hurt was not done intentionally)

•Apologies matter (it can be more difficult to forgive if you don’t get a sincere apology)

•Taking responsibility for your actions (helps you forgive someone or helps someone forgive you)

Remind Big Buddies that by developing an understanding of the topic, they will be better able to help their Little Buddies talk about the issues raised in the story. Ask questions such as: •Have you ever had a hard time forgiving someone? Why? What helped you forgive that person?

•Has understanding someone else’s perspective ever helped you forgive him or her?

•How important are apologies? Are there “good” apologies and “bad” apologies? Explain.

Explore vocabulary

Review any vocabulary words that may be unfamiliar, and point out words that the Little Buddies may need to have defined (see Appendix, Vocabulary Lists). In addition to using the vocabulary in the story, encourage students to also use words to describe their feelings.

Review communication skills

Discuss any communication issues or other problems that came up during the previous sessions. Review solutions and strategies as needed. Ask students to share strategies they used to help keep the conversation going during the previous buddy sessions.

Explore Buster’s Growing Grudge

★As students go through the story together, brainstorm ways they can help their

Little Buddies understand the events in the story. In particular, they may need help in understanding that Binky “stole” the joke that Buster intended to use in his school report.

Note that Binky didn't think of his actions as "stealing" and did realize that what he did would upset Buster. ★ Point out the “grudge” gremlin that appears and continues to grow. Help the Big

Buddies understand the visual representation of a “grudge” and how it grows throughout the story. How do Buster's facial expressions and body language indicate the effect the grudge is having on him? ★ Let the Big Buddies go through all the different endings, but emphasize that they should let their Little Buddy choose the ending he or she prefers. ★ Gather the class together to answer any questions about the content or logistics of the interactive story.

Practice Being a Big Buddy

Here are a few ideas your students can use to practice their Big Buddy role: •Role play being Big and Little Buddies by asking and answering questions.

• You may want students to practice using the forgiveness Think About It cards (see Appendix, Think About It cards). •Review strategies in the Training the Buddy section (page 56). Encourage students to list a few strategies on can index card to use as they work with their Little Buddies.