March•April 2015
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Healthy Eats • Health & Fitness Tips • Crafts • Family Fun Events... & MORE!!!
Issue Six March • April 2015 publisher & owner Joey Coakley Beck jbeck@beckmediagroup.com editorial director Hayleigh Worgan hworgan@beckmediagroup.com contributors Jeremy Holmes, Decca Knight, LewisGale Regional Health System, Heather Quintana, Danielle Raymond, Hayleigh Worgan sales director Cheryl Matthews cmatthews@beckmediagroup.com advertising inquiries advertise@beckmediagroup.com poppyseed@beckmediagroup.com (540) 904-6800
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LLC
806 Wasena Avenue, Suite 101 Roanoke, VA 24015 540.904.6800 fax 540.904.6803 www.poppyseedfamily.com Poppyseed Magazine is the property of Beck Media Group LLC. It is a free publication printed bimonthly and is distributed throughout Southwest and Central Virginia and beyond. The concept and design of Poppyseed Magazine, as well as the design, advertisements, art, photos and editorial content is property of Beck Media Group LLC and may not be copied or reprinted without written permission from the publisher. ©2014 Beck Media Group LLC All Rights Reserved. PRINTED IN THE USA
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Smart phones, tablets, and computers have all become an integral part of our lives. So many important opportunities to connect are missed because of our growing addiction to social networking. Be honest, can you remember the last time you saw a flower blooming without feeling the compulsive need to Instagram it? Or the last time your family enjoyed a picnic with your phone in the car or silently stowed away in the bottom of a bag? It is important to let our children see us think creatively. We want them to remember us playing with them in the park, not glued to a computer screen. When they grow up and leave home, we want them to be able to picture our faces without the addition of a smart phone in front of our noses. If this issue has a theme, that theme would be forging a real connection with one another as a family. So, play a board game together. Make a butterfly feeder. Ride the bus together—but above all REALLY open up and talk to one another. And, if you need help, keep this magazine stowed away for reference. We’ve got you covered. As always, stay tuned to our Facebook page for great giveaways! You are going to love this month’s prizes. Happy Spring!
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A World of Butterflies
Putting aside our differences Did you know? Butterflies are often considered as a symbol for change and joy. The eyes of a butterfly consist of thousands of microscopic lenses, allowing them to “produce a mosaic view of the scene around them” (www.learnaboutbutterflies.com). We chose a butterfly theme for this issue for a variety of reasons. As many of you know, raising a child is not always as easy as following a certain set of guidelines. Life happens, and before you know it, that gorgeous baby develops thoughts and feelings of their own that are not always influenced by you. Even as a toddler, they exhibit a level of creativity or imagination that is solely their own. As they transition into a young adult, their freedom to make decisions and be their own person increases. Our goal, with some of the more sensitive and brave articles in this issue, is not to attack or exclude anyone. Simply put, we want to start a mature and productive conversation as a society. One of the scariest things we face as adults is rejection—and it often starts in our teenage years. Imagine facing rejection all day, and then being too scared to discuss your feelings with the people you love most because they might reject you also. That is a very unpleasant mosaic view of the scene around you. As your child transitions into the beautiful butterfly that you will send out into the world, we understand that you may not agree with all of their decisions. And that is ok, because your parents may not have always agreed with your choices. But we ask you to remember the first time someone listened to you—the first time someone told you everything was going to be ok and that they were proud of you. We implore you, once more, to put down your devices. Speak to one another and really listen. When the only way you feel comfortable speaking is to a status bar on a social networking site, the world becomes a very lonely place. Love is a beautiful and powerful thing. Ultimately, our wish for you and your family is that you will be surrounded by love. When the expectations of the world Page 4 March•April 2015
around you are so high, it is an amazing feeling to know that there are people who love you and will stand by you through your changes. Because that means no matter where life takes you, you will always have a home. And that brings us back to our butterfly theme. People change, situations change, and wouldn’t it be nice if somehow we were able to find some common ground and subsequent joy in all of this adaptation? If, instead of screaming at and accusing one another, we opened our eyes to the plights of those who are different? So, instead of destroying a unique and beautiful butterfly, we took the time to admire how its life contributes to the world around us? We think so.
Healthy & Convenient Choices Healthy Snacks for Hungry Kids
Written by Heather Quintana
Happy Healthy Cooks tm “Mommmmm.... I’m hungry, what is there to eat?” How many times have you heard this? Rather, how many times a day do you hear this? Growing kids can be hungry often. When they hit middle school many seem to develop a bottomless pit! Packaged snacks such as Goldfish, Doritos, fruit gummies, cereal bars, pretzels, and snack cakes, line our pantry shelves because they are convenient, taste good, and are quick to grab in a pinch. Unfortunately, most of them have little to no nutritional value and are loaded with chemicals, artificial flavors, dyes, and sugar. If you’re like many parents, you are looking for healthier alternatives that your kids will actually eat. Pre-made trail mix is usually loaded with added sugars and preservatives—make your own and keep it in a big jar. Most children, middle school and older, can learn to use the stove to make simple foods such as scrambled eggs or oatmeal. It’s simple to poke a few holes with a fork into a sweet potato and pop it in the microwave for a few minutes until it is tender. When it’s ready, split it open with a knife and sprinkle with salt and pepper, or cumin, and a little butter if you’d like. Teach your kids to read a recipe and safely use a knife and they will be empowered! Make a bowl of black bean salad with tortilla chips (see recipe on right) and keep it covered in the fridge for everyone to share for a couple of days. This is a recipe you can make together the first time and ask your children to make on their own the following week (make sure you teach them to clean up after themselves too)! Additional easy snacks to prepare ahead of time and grab in a pinch include homemade trail mix, rice crackers and tuna salad, popcorn (avoid microwavable as it contains chemicals), and organic corn tortilla chips with melted cheese. Teach your child to invest in their well-being by staying prepared with healthy, easy to grab-and-go food choices—it is a great lesson to learn early and carry through life!
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Simple Black Bean Salad
Teach your child to read a recipe and safely use a knife in the kitchen, and you will open up a whole new world of options for them! This recipe is loaded with protein, fiber, healthy carbs, vitamins and minerals.
Ingredients:
1 can black beans, rinsed & drained 2 cups frozen corn 1 red bell pepper, chopped 6 green onions, chopped (or 1/2 red onion, chopped) Juice of a lime 2 teaspoons cumin A couple dashes of hot sauce Pinch of salt (optional)
Directions:
Combine all of the ingredients and let marinate for 15 minutes. Serve with corn tortilla chips.
Heather Millar Quintana is a Certified Health Coach and Director of Happy Healthy Cooks in Roanoke, a program that turns kids and their families on to healthful whole foods because their lives depend on it. At any given time, you’ll likely find Heather cooking, teaching, mountain biking, relaxing by the water, or busy raising two happy healthy funny sweet boys.
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Written by Decca Knight
Parent-In-Training
The Comparison Game
Having interacted with hundreds of families, I have witnessed many damaging family dynamics. We all know how emotional and physical abuse, neglect, and shaming can impact our kids. But, often times, there are more subtle interactions going on, ones that most people would not see. One of those is the comparison of siblings. Many of us know, as parents, that it is hurtful to overtly compare siblings. We try to steer clear of saying, “Why can’t you be more like your brother. He is so smart.” Hearing such phrases makes most of us cringe. However, consider the more indirect ways we compare siblings. I can’t tell you how many times I have been introduced to someone’s children and the parent says, “This is Jimmy, our youngest. Isn’t he adorable? Just the cutest kid ever!” Meanwhile, Eric, the older son is standing by listening. It may be accurate to say that Jimmy is an adorable butterball with dimples that dominate his face and angelic curls that bounce when he laughs. But, what is the unstated message when a parent utters such phrases? What may Eric be thinking? Might he believe that his sibling is more adored than he is? I have also had parents say to me, in front of their children, “Emma is by far the easiest child. I never have to get on her.” Meanwhile, her sister Amy, who is more willful, is standing by listening. Might Amy begin to believe that she is the problem child? Might Amy begin to believe that her parents hold Emma in higher regard? In my experience, people sometimes pay more attention to the “small whisperings” than the “shouting.” This is especially true for kids. They begin to compare and contrast, forming belief systems that coincide with the sometimes subtle family dynamics. Jimmy is always being loved upon for his cuteness. Emma is always being praised for being compliant. Meanwhile Eric and Amy are beginning to believe that they are “less-than” or second fiddle. So, let’s work on paying attention to the understated ways in which we send our kids messages. Let’s “step back” and see our interactions through our child’s lens. We may realize that life from their vantage point is not so rosy.
Decca Knight is a wife, mother, counselor, and parenting educator. In an effort to further help kids and parents, Decca began studying a variety of parenting philosophies. She teaches classes, consults with other “Parents-in-training,” and runs Blue Ridge Parenting and Consulting LLC. For more information about parenting classes and consultation visit Decca’s website www.blueridgeparenting.com
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Sharing a Seat on the Bus
Using public transportation to bond with your family
Written by Jeremy Holmes
When Penelope was little and still bound to a car seat in the second row of the minivan, one of our favorite things to do was take the bus around town. Initially, I had dragged her with me because a project I was working on required me to take random bus trips at odd hours, and bringing her along was easier than working out a babysitter for an hour here and there. After our first few trips, though, she enjoyed the ride so much we started taking the bus and trolley whenever we could. At first, it was simply the freedom. Not bound to a car seat, Penelope could explore. She’d kneel at the window and watch unfamiliar houses and neighborhoods pass by, which no doubt to her was a revelation—Roanoke was bigger than she had ever imagined. More importantly, she could point out interesting sights and we would talk about them—something we’d never be able to do with me piloting the Dodge with my attention on the road rather than her. Then, all the calls of “Daddy, look at that” would have been annoying distractions. Now, they had become moments to share something with her. When she wasn’t looking out the window, she was looking at the people. Sometimes talking to them, mostly just responding shyly when they talked to her, complimenting her dress or her ponytails or her hair bow. We talked to each other. I don’t, now, remember about what, but I remember being able to pay attention to her, and only her, as the streetscape trundled past us. The bus trip wasn’t just a chance to escape the car seat; it was a new way of spending time with each other. Sure, sometimes those trips were longer than they absolutely needed to be, but that was only if we measured necessity by the time it took to get from A to B. Measured by what we did along that distance, the extra ten minutes on the bus, the extra five spent walking to and waiting at the stop, became something to look forward to. The longer trip was the better trip, because it wasn’t time spent trying to remember those defensive driving techniques I learned in high school, or censoring what I really wanted to shout at the lady who just pulled out in front of me to avoid teaching my daughter new and interesting vocabulary words (there has to be some data out there showing most profanity is taught to our children from behind the wheel). The demands on our time as parents are remarkable, and often hidden. In the rush to get things done efficiently and quickly, it is sometimes the case that we miss the opportunity for some good, old-fashioned, inefficient quality time with our kids. To this day, Jeremy Holmes is Program Director for RIDE Solutions in Roanoke. He is an advocate for families getting out of their cars and getting to know their there’s no better way to get Penelope excited about an otherwise inneighborhoods by walking, biking, and taking the bus together. nocuous shopping trip or lunch date than to add, “And take your coat, we’re walking to the bus stop.”
Gender
& Parenting Providing support & love to children Written by Danielle Raymond
Gender is a popular topic in today’s news. When a child says they are another gender, many parents find themselves wondering if it is a phase or something deeper. According to the American Academy of Pediatrics, children become aware of gender in the first year of life, and their gender identity is relatively stable by age four or five. “When children first become aware that some people are ‘girls’ and some people are ‘boys,’ it is not uncommon for them to play around with the ideas of what gender means,” said Dr. Laura Boyd Farmer, licensed counselor and professor of counselor education at Virginia Tech. “Kids are just soaking in this information and trying to make sense of it.” Page 12 March•April 2015
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Wes Cook, a transgender male attending Hollins University, knew he was a boy from a young age even while his mother tried to push away his desires and insisted that he was only a ”tomboy.” “The first time I knew I was different was when I was in the 4th grade,” Cook said. “I went over to my male cousin’s house where he lent me a pair of old jeans. I remember how baggy they were and feeling like I was home in my body. That night I prayed, which was unusual. I pleaded for some sort of higher power to grant me a male body.” While many children are sure of their identity, it’s normal for some kids explore their gender and the roles that they are taught. “When my daughter was two, she started saying that she was a boy,” Farmer said. “We would simply acknowledge her by saying, ‘Ok! You’re a boy.’ I think she was trying out her ideas of gender and imagining how life would be if she were a boy. After several months, she stopped saying that she was a boy and returned to identifying herself as a girl.” No matter if a child is expressing their true gender or if they are exploring the concept, how parents respond is important. “When I came out to my mom a year and a half ago, she cried over her chicken fingers at Cheddars,” Cook said. “I love my mother very much and she is trying, but I know I do not have her support. My mom raised a beautifully intelligent and kind son and doesn’t even know it.” The reaction of parents can either build or destroy a child’s confidence and trust, especially Wes Cook, above and left for LGBTQ individuals who are at risk of rejection by their family. The average age of homelessness for transgender youth is 13. “Kids who feel accepted and affirmed by their parents experience significantly less stress and have fewer mental health concerns,” Farmer said. “It’s important to try to be aware of what messages we are sending our kids through conversations we have throughout the day. Dr. Laura Boyd Parents can be their child’s greatest ally, advocate, and supporter.” Farmer, professor of “Young people dealing with this need to know that it gets bet- counselor education at Virginia Tech and ter,” Cook said. “You won’t magically wake up one day in the body you her 2 daughters want, but half of the fun is watching it transition and knowing how hard you have worked.” The process of coming out and finding oneself is challenging for all members of the family. Families can learn more from resources like the website TransYouth Family Allies at www.imatyfa.org and Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education network at www.glsen.org. Organizations like PFLAG with chapters in Roanoke, Floyd and New River Valley provide community support. Also, Roanoke DESTINY offers youth peer support with professional group facilitators.
No matter if a child is expressing their true gender or if they are exploring the concept, how parents respond is important.
Danielle Raymond is a freshman at Hollins University. She is studying English with a concentration in creative writing. She spends most of her time competing for her school’s swim team, journaling and talking about dogs.
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o t n i g n i r p S
y t i v i t Crea Unique finds to inspire your family
Psst. Keep an eye on our Facebook page where we’ll be giving some of these away!!
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We can’t wait for spring and warmer weather! Unfortunately, there will be a few cold days between now and then. So, entertain your family with a few great games, books, and art supplies that will help spark their creativity. Here are some of our favorite products to challenge and inspire your child: Disruptus is a unique game that asks players to look at objects and ideas and use different approaches to innovate using disruptive thinking. This way of thinking means looking at something and coming up with an entirely different way to achieve the same end. It has been used in the creation of digital music, camera phones, and car sharing programs. We love this game for the creativity it encourages in children of all ages, but we especially love that the image cards in this game can also be used by non-verbal children to help tell a story or identify something they want or need. Find out more about Disruptus and purchase the game for your family at www. funnyboneproducts.com. We do not mean to sound like snobs, but we really love Wee Can Too’s line of natural and organic art supplies, specifically their veggie crayons. Made from all veggie-based ingredients, including food grade soy wax, they are always hand-to-mouth safe. Visit www.weecantooart.com for more information and to purchase a set for your favorite little artist. It’s no secret that Tom Angleberger is one of our favorite authors. That’s why we were so excited to get our hands on a copy of his newest book, The Rat with the Human Face: The Quikpick Papers. This is the second adventure in the series, and it is perfect for your middle-school student. Robots and kids are a perfect combination. For your child that is fascinated with building and technology, check out Recycled Robots: 10 Robot Projects by Robert Malone. This is more than just an instruction manual for creating ten different robots—it is a kit that allows makers to use their creativity and imagination to solve problems. Each plan includes a materials list, step-by-step directions and fullcolor photographs. The kit also includes essential accessories like a battery-operated motor and two windup walkers, plus templates, dowels, beads, wire, mounting squares, and google eyes! For your favorite little fashion designer, The Fashion Designer’s Handbook & Fashion Kit: Learn to Sew and Become a Designer in 33 Fabulous Projects is a great outlet for creativity. This book is great for beginners because it teaches them how to sew doll-sized outfits first and then child-sized outfits. It encourages children to think and work like designers—from finding inspiration to sketching and developing a personal style. Most of these projects require little to no adult help.
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In the spirit of coming together as a family, we present a DIY that can require a little parental help. Set aside an hour or so on a Saturday morning, and create something to fill your house with spring! Create your own (ie. simple!) butterflies—spring and summer will be here soon! This craft comes from Make It & Love It. Visit them at www. makeit-loveit.com
r r r
To make your own butterflies, gather some plain white paper towels, food coloring, and pipe cleaners. Mix your food coloring with water in separate bowls. An earth-friendly option would be to use fruit and veggie juices for other beautiful color choices. Fold your paper towel in half, in half again, another time, then one more time…….into sixteenths. Allow your child to dip each corner of the folded paper towel into the colored water of their choosing. (Don’t dip the paper towel in too deep or for too long. Leaving part of the paper towel white in some spots also helps with the coloring and outcome. Let the kids experiment.) The bigger kids can probably do the dipping themselves after showing them a few times.
r r
Now, let the excess water drip back into the bowls after dipping each color, then open up the paper towel and lay flat to dry. Once each paper towel is dry gather along the center of each paper towel, wrap a pipe cleaner around the center, twist it off, even out the wings, flatten the body, and then curl the antenna’s. Now, hang from the ceiling with some string, pin to the wall, perch on a desk or just allow them to flit around the room. Page 17 March•April 2015
Building Young Engineers One Toy At a Time
Goldie Blox aims to “disrupt the pink aisle”
Goldie Blox is a toy company with a purpose. Created by Mechanical Engineer Debbie Sterling with the help of organizations like Techbridge, Girls Who Code, and the Society for Women Engineers, this company aims to “get girls building.” They are introducing products that will tap into engineering interests and inspire children to go into the STEM field later in life.
Each toy set has differing skill concepts, varying age ranges, and characters that are “cool,
interesting, smart and relatable.” Goldie Blox also claims their products’ storylines and tasks help Page 18 March•April 2015
with confidence as well as spatial and verbal skills that come with the reward of building things.
Cool Stuff
Written by Danielle Raymond
The set “Goldie Blox and the Dunk
Tank” was awarded the Gold Seal from Oppenheim Toy Portfolio’s Best Toy Award.
Children aged four to nine can explore hinge concepts while given the task to wash Nacho, Goldie’s dirty dog so that Goldie and her friends can get to the Carnival on time.
With the help of a construction set
to give ideas, beginner engineers can follow along with the book series to see how Goldie and her team progress. The solutions are unlimited and they learn the details of levers and hinges in the process. Their website has all the toy sets, t-shirts, a blog and BloxTowna sister website with games and building tutorials.
“My five year-old old absolutely
loves these,” one customer said. “It is a great toy that helps to cross gender stereotypes and develop a child’s creativeness while not pigeonholing them.” Visit www.goldieblox.com for
Danielle Raymond is a freshman at Hollins University. She is studying English with a concentration in creative writing. She spends most of her time competing for her school’s swim team, journaling and talking about dogs.
more information and to purchase the perfect construction set for your beginner engineer! Stay tuned to our Facebook page in March for your chance to win a “Goldie Blox and the Dunk Tank” set of your very own!
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Staying Healthy in the Spring Joyce Cummings, MD Pediatrician, LewisGale Physicians
Since flu season can run all the way until May, what precautions should our family take to stay healthy while flying and staying in hotels during Spring Break? One of the most important precautions to take while travelling during the flu season is the flu vaccine. Flu season can start as early as October, peaks in January or February, and as stated in the question, can last until May. While the vaccine does not protect against every strain of the virus, it plays a definite role in the fight against the flu. It is also a good idea to carry hand sanitizer and sanitizing cloths for airports, airplanes, car trips and hotel rooms. Try and keep your children from touching their eyes, nose and mouth.
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mings or To contact Dr. Cum ar you, ne ns ia other physic se® 24/7 call Consult-A-Nur at 877-242-2362.
My child has spring time allergies and I don’t want to keep them inside during recess. What non-drowsy allergy medicines are safe for children? I would recommend Loratidine, Certrizine or Fexofenadine, which are all available over the counter. If your child is taking any other daily medications make sure to check with their pediatrician first. If your child doesn’t have a pediatrician, make sure to visit LGPHYSICIANS.COM.
Our family is traveling internationally for Spring Break. Are there certain immunizations our child(ren) should have before we leave? I highly recommend the CDC travelers health website (wwwnc.cdc.gov/travel). You can search by destination and the site even lets you specify if you are travelling with children. You’ll learn what vaccines and medications you’ll need, how to stay healthy and safe, receive a healthy travel packing list along with health notices and what you’ll need to do after your trip. Page 21 March•April 2015
things to do
March 28
Audible Easter Egg Hunt: An opportunity for children with visual impairments The 2nd Annual Roanoke Valley Audible Egg Hunt is taking place at the Daleville Town Center on Saturday, March 28 from 1-3 pm. This unique event is perfect for children with blindness and visual impairments because it features beeping eggs! The inner workings of these special eggs are donated by the International Association of Bomb Technicians and Investigators and they are assembled by local bomb squad members. This is an amazing opportunity for children who experience difficulty with sight. After children have found the beeping eggs, they exchange them for “goodie” filled baskets of eggs, toys, etc. They are accepting donations of candy-filled eggs or items for baskets until March 16. Plastic eggs may be filled with wrapped candy, small prizes, and stickers. They are also in need of small toys, stuffed animals, games, and coloring books. Contact Mary Brown if you would like to help out with or register for this event. You can email her at mkbrown@rcps.info or call 540-853-1911. Registration is required by March 20, because funding is limited. See you there!
April 18
Blue Ridge Kite Festival: A great way to kick off the summer We can’t wait to enjoy a day of fun with the whole family at the 17th Annual Blue Ridge Kite Festival on April 18! Head over to Green Hill Park in Salem between 10 am and 4 pm for free admission, parking, kite kits, t-shirts, and ice cream (while supplies last)! Children must be accompanied by an adult at this festival— so make it a family outing! This is the perfect way to enjoy the warmer weather and welcome summer. In addition to kite-related festivities, arts and craft vendors will have items available for purchase. Check out any of the participating food vendors for a variety of lunch options. www.s-rcchamber.org