Royal Devon and Exeter Hospital Bereavement Booklet
H e lp for th e B e reave
Making arrangements following a bereavement
“Memories are the loveliest thing, They last from day to day, They can’t get lost; They don’t wear out, And can’t be given away.”
(Anonymous)
The following is a quick-step guide to help
1. Consider organ and tissue donation
2. Contact a funeral director
3. Awaiting a call from the Bereavement Team
A member of the Bereavement Team will contact you the next working day to introduce themselves and guide you through the process.
If we have been unable to contact you by 2.00pm please call 01392 402349. Our office hours are Monday-Friday, 9am-4pm. We do not work weekends or Bank Holidays but messages can be left on our secure voicemail facility and we will get back to you as soon as possible.
If you come by car to the hospital to deal with any matters relating to your bereavement please ask nursing staff on the ward to organise parking clearance. This will allow you to park free of charge for the duration of your visit.
Our condolences
We would like to express our sincere condolences to you at this sad time. Bereavement is a time of grief and sorrow and the death of someone close can come as a dreadful shock.
Some people may feel overwhelmed, confused, even numb at first. Crying and feeling angry or guilty are also natural feelings that can last a while. Questions such as “why us?” and “if only?” are normal.
Your concentration, appetite and sleeping may be affected and you may feel more tired than usual. Some people feel anxious or experience feelings of panic and it is quite natural to feel depressed. Your life has been turned upside down and it will take time to adjust. Each of us will react in different ways at different times and there are no ‘set’ feelings that you ‘should’ have.
Mourning is an essential yet painful process and sharing our emotions with someone else can often help. An important first step to think about is whether there are people you might contact to support you, or even be with you, over the first few days.
Information to help you during a bereavement
Bereavement Team
We provide sympathetic support and assistance to bereaved relatives and carers to help them through the procedures following the death of a patient at the hospital. This booklet is designed to help you cope with these practical steps over the coming few days or weeks.
We are always willing to make this information available in other formats or languages.
If you need to receive this information in another format or in a language other than English, call us on 01392 402349 and we can discuss your needs.
How we can help
To ensure that the practical arrangements are handled in a caring, professional and timely manner the RD&E’s Bereavement Team can help you deal with the following people:
• The RD&E’s Mortuary staff
• Hospital Chaplains
• Medical Examiners
• Funeral Directors (undertakers)
• The Coroner and Coroner’s Officers
• The Registrar of births, deaths and marriages
• GPs (General Practitioner)
1. Tissue donation
Most people can be considered for tissue donation after death but there is only a short period of time for this to happen. All adults in England will be considered to have agreed to be a donor when they die unless they have recorded a decision not to donate. You still have a choice about whether you would like your loved one to become a donor. Our Trust specialises in cornea donation which would involve the whole eye being donated.
Following a death, staff at the hospital will check the Organ Donor Register to see if your loved one has made any decision regarding donation.
If you wish to consider donation, eyes for corneal transplant may be donated up to 24 hours after death. Donation will not delay funeral plans or alter the appearance of your loved one.
Each donation can help at least two people to see again and sometimes more. Some people find that donating tissue for transplant can help the grieving process.
If you would like to discuss this further or find out more please contact any one of the following:
• The Bereavement Team on 01392 402349 Monday – Friday 9am – 4pm
• The Mortuary Team on 01392 403060
• The NHS Blood and Transplant Service 0800 432 0559, option 1
• A doctor or nurse involved in the care of your relative
2. Making contact with a funeral director
Following a death you can contact a funeral director as soon as you wish to start making arrangements and you do not need to wait for the paperwork to be completed.
Funeral directors are available during office hours, however they can be contacted 24 hours a day, every day, for emergency calls. To minimise waiting time, it is helpful to telephone the funeral directors to make an appointment to see them. They will make all the necessary arrangements with you.
Once any necessary legal paperwork has been completed by the hospital, a member of the Bereavement Team will contact you to take verbal permission so that they can arrange for the funeral director to collect your loved one from the hospital.
The cost of a funeral varies and you may wish to see a brochure and price list or contact several funeral directors to compare prices, services provided and facilities available before making a decision.
A list of funeral directors can be found via:
• The National Association of Funeral Directors, 618 Warwick Road, Solihull, West Midlands, B91 1AA
telephone 0121 711 1343
• The National Society of Allied and Independent Funeral Directors, 3 Bullfields, Sawbridgeworth, Hertfordshire, CM21 9DB
telephone 0345 230 6777
• Funeral Guide - www.funeralguide.co.uk
3. The Bereavement Service Overview
Certain formalities must be dealt with following a death in hospital which can be divided into 4 stages:
1. You will receive a call from the Bereavement Team, usually before the end of the next working day. They will explain what is going to happen and give you an approximate idea of how long this process will take. If tissue donation is a possibility, they will also discuss this with you. They will ask if you know who your Funeral Director will be and if it is going to be a burial or cremation service.
2. You will then receive a phone call from the Medical Examiner’s Office (see Section 4) who will tell you the cause of death and answer any medical questions or concerns you have. They will also inform you if there will be a referral to the Coroner.
3. You will then receive a call from the Bereavement Team to let you know when all the paperwork has been completed. You will not need to come to the hospital to collect any paperwork. Your loved one can then be released into the care of the Funeral Director.
4. Lastly, you will receive a call from the Booking Team at Teignbridge Registry Office. This is to arrange a face to face appointment at your nearest registry office to complete the registration and to collect the Death Certificates (see Section 9).
4. Medical Examiner
Within a few days of the death of your loved one, you will receive a telephone call from the Medical Examiner’s Office. A Medical Examiner is a senior doctor who has not been involved in the care of your loved one. Their job is to independently review their medical notes and discuss the care they received.
They will discuss with you the cause of death which will be recorded on the Medical Certificate of Cause of Death (MCCD). They will also let you know if there needs to be a referral to the Coroner (See Section 5).
Following this call the Medical Examiner’s Office will release the MCCD and other legal documents to the Bereavement Team.
5. The Coroner (if applicable)
Under certain circumstances, it is a legal requirement to inform the Coroner of a person’s death. For example,
• If a patient dies after having a fall or an accident
• If the death was sudden or unexpected
• If they have had a recent operation
• If there is a possibility of it being an unnatural death
The Coroner will then decide if the hospital doctor can issue the Medical Certificate of Cause of Death or whether a post-mortem is needed.
If the Coroner requests a post-mortem, your permission is not required. You may then contact the Coroner’s Officers on 01392 225696 for further information. The office is open Monday to Friday 9.00am to 4.00pm.
If a post-mortem is needed, the Coroner will issue a certificate to the Registrar once the cause of death has been established and enquiries are complete. You should then proceed with registering the death as described in Section 9.
The Coroner will organise with you the release of your loved one into the care of your chosen funeral director. The Coroner will inform you when you can register the death and arrange a funeral service.
If a post-mortem is not needed, the Coroner will inform the Medical Examiner and the process will occur as in the Bereavement Service Overview on page 5.
The Bereavement Team will then contact you to arrange registration of the death.
Please let your funeral director know if a post-mortem is being arranged.
More information can be obtained in the Ministry of Justice publication:
A Guide to Coroner Services for Bereaved People (publishing.service.gov.uk)
6. Arranging to see your loved one
The Funeral Director will collect your loved one from the hospital as soon as possible and relatives can arrange to visit them there. Should you wish to arrange this please contact your Funeral Director to make an appointment.
If you wish to visit your relative while they are still at the hospital, please call the Bereavement Team on 01392 402349 Monday to Friday 9am – 3.30pm to arrange this.
A visit to our Chapel of Rest to see a loved one is by appointment only. The hospital will always try to facilitate a visit but sometimes this may not be possible. At weekends and bank holidays the Mortuary is closed so the possibility of a viewing at these times is very limited.
7. Collecting property and valuables
You should arrange to collect any property and valuables that have been held for safekeeping from the ward. You will need to sign for these so a member of the ward staff may need to seek authorisation if you are not the next-ofkin or executor.
Belongings are not stored at the Mortuary and anything being worn by your loved one will be released with them to the Funeral Directors.
8. Hospital Post-Mortem
Occasionally, the hospital doctor issuing the Medical Certificate of Cause of Death may ask you to consider a Hospital Post-Mortem and they will explain the reasons why. A Hospital Post-Mortem can provide more information about an illness, however it is not to determine the cause of death.
Please note that only certain family members can sign the consent form to allow this to take place.
A Hospital Post-Mortem does not normally delay funeral arrangements and registration of death can still take place.
9. Registering the death
Once the Medical Examiner has released the Medical Certificate of Cause of Death, the Bereavement Team will email this to the Teignbridge Registry Office. The Registrars will then contact you by phone within a few days to arrange a face to face appointment at one of the local registry offices. These are in Exeter, Totnes, Barnstaple, Tavistock, Exmouth, Honiton, Bideford, Okehampton, Newton Abbot, and Tiverton. You may register anywhere in Devon except Torbay or Plymouth as they are in separate unitary authorities and have their own registration services.
A death must be registered in the county that it has occurred. If you are unable to register in Devon you can Register by Declaration. When the Teignbridge Registry Office call, you will need to inform them of which office you would like to use. They will send the paperwork to your chosen office for you to complete and then it will be returned back to them. The Teignbridge Registry Office will then send the Death Certificates to you by post, which will take a couple of days.
In order to register a death, you must be a relative of the deceased or the person making the funeral arrangements. You may wish to take someone along to support you when registering.
The Registrar will ask you for the following information about your loved one:
• Information about when and where the death occurred.
• Their full name.
• Any maiden surname (if applicable).
• If they were married/widowed or a civil partner, the full name(s) and occupation of spouse or civil partner.
• Date of birth of spouse/civil partner if still married/in civil partnership at the time of death.
• Last known occupation.
• Address.
• Their birth and marriage/civil partner certificate (if applicable) - these items are useful but not essential.
• Medical card – (this is useful but not essential).
• A form of photographic ID for the person registering. After a death has been registered, one or more certificates may be purchased at the time of registration. Further certificates can be obtained at a later date if required. For further information please visit www.devon.gov. uk/registration_fees or call them on 0345 155 1002
This information is entered into the register and the person registering the death must sign this with their usual signature, using special registrar’s ink. You will be required to read the entry so please make sure you have your reading glasses if you use them.
The Registrar will give you a “Tell Us Once” service access code which, once registered alerts other government agencies to a death. To use this code you log onto Gov.uk website and search “Tell Us Once”.
A Certificate for Burial or Cremation (‘green form’) will be sent to your funeral director by the Registrar. This authorises them to proceed with the funeral although all funeral arrangements can be made prior to this.
You will need to get copies of the death certificate for a number of official purposes. We cannot say how many you will need as individual circumstances vary, but as examples you may need copies for such things as insurance, premium bonds, bank accounts and private pensions.
Please note that there is no free copy of the certificate and there is no legal requirement for you to register within 5 days.
People you may need to notify:
Legal/Financial
q Bank/Building Society
q Solicitor
Employment/Pension
q Dept of Work & Pensions
q Social Security office
q Inland Revenue
Domestic & Personal
q TV Licensing
q Gas/Electricity/Water
q Newspaper/Milkman
q Telephone company
q Rental companies
Items that may need returning:
q Pensions/Benefits books
q Driving Licence
q NHS equipment on loan
q Store cards/loyalty cards
q Insurance companies
q Credit card companies
q Employer
q Trade Union
q Vehicle Licensing
q Council Offices
q Cancel appointments
q Clubs/Associations
q Royal Mail deliveries
q Passport
q National Insurance card
q Library cards/season tickets
10. Other help available
As part of the Trust’s commitment to continuous improvement, we invite you to provide your views on the quality of care that your loved one received during their time with us. We are always happy to hear about experiences that have exceeded the expectations of patients and loved ones. We are also very keen to learn when we could have done better to meet the needs of our patients.
Where you wish thanks or praise to be passed on, we will ensure that happens. If you have concerns, we will look into the matter for you, include you in the review process and then share the outcome with you. You will have the opportunity to discuss any issues that you would like to raise with the Medical Examiner, who will contact you in the days following the death of your loved one (see page 5), and they will advise you how to take things further if you should wish.
Alternatively, you may make contact,
• Face to face: Patient Advice & Liaison Service (PALS) at the main hospital entrance weekdays between 9.30am-4.30pm (no appointment required)
• By telephone: The Bereavement Team on 01392 402349 or the Patient Advice & Liaison Service (PALS) are contactable on 01392 402093 weekdays between 9.30am-4.30pm
• Online: via the ‘Get in Touch’ button on the Trust website www.rdehospital.nhs.uk
The Hospital Chaplaincy is a team of experienced Chaplains and volunteers drawn from a range of religious and belief traditions.
For details of our Chaplaincy service please call 01392 402024 or call the hospital switchboard on 01392 411611 and ask them to contact the Chaplaincy. You can leave a message at the Chaplaincy Office next to the Hospital Chapel, Level 2, Area E, RD&E Hospital (Wonford). You can also ask your own Pastor, Minister, Priest or other religious or spiritual leader to contact them on your behalf.
You may wish to contact other services and organisations such as those listed below for ongoing help and support following your bereavement:
• Age UK Exeter 01392 202092
Support older people throughout Exeter. www.ageuk.org.uk/exeter
• Stop Mail 0808 168 9607
A service developed by the Bereavement Support Network to help families stop junk mail being sent to the recently bereaved. www.stopmail.co.uk
• Care Direct 0345 1551 007
• Carers UK 0808 808 7777
Advice and support for carers, including in bereavement. www.carersuk.org
• Citizens Advice Bureau 03444 111444 www.citizensadvice.org.uk
• CRUSE Bereavement Care 0808 808 1677
Support, advice and information to children, young people and adults when someone dies. www.cruse.org.uk
• Compassionate Friends 0345 123 2304
Support and care for bereaved family members who have suffered the death of a child or children of any age. www.tcf.org.uk
• Devon Carers 0345 643 4435
If you care, have cared or now need to care for someone, Devon Carers are here to help. www.devon.gov.uk/care-and-health/carers
• Good Grief Trust
Practical and emotional support for anyone who has been bereaved. www.thegoodgrieftrust.org
• Pete’s Dragons 01395 277780
Suicide Bereavement support for those left behind. Email: hq@petesdragons.org.uk
• Samaritans 116 123
Available day or night, 365 days a year. www.samaritans.org
• SANDS (Stillbirth and Neonatal Death Society) 0808 164 3332
Sands provides bereavement support services for families who are recently bereaved through stillbirth and neonatal death. www.sands.org.uk
• Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide 0300 111 5065
Available 9am – 9pm Monday to Sunday.
• Brake 0808 800 0401
Supporting families and friends who are bereaved due to a roads accident.
www.brake.org.uk
• Winston’s Wish 08088 020 021
Support for children and young people after the death of a parent or sibling.
www.winstonswish.org
11. Stopping Junk Mail to the recently deceased
If someone you know has died, the amount of unwanted marketing post being sent to them can be greatly reduced which helps to stop painful daily reminders.
By registering with the free service www.stopmail.co.uk the names and addresses of the deceased are removed from mailing lists, stopping most advertising mail within as little as six weeks. If you cannot access the internet you can call 0808 168 9607, where you will be asked for very simple information that will take only a few minutes to complete.
This free of charge service provided by the Bereavement Support Network will not only actively reduce the unwanted marketing mail but also can help reduce the likelihood of identity theft following the death of someone close. The information is not used for any other purpose and you only have to complete this once. Additionally to Stop Mail a comparable service can also be accessed from the Bereavement Register or Deceased Preference Service if you would prefer to use them.
Whilst the Trust is grateful for the support of companies advertising, we stress that any inclusion of any advertisement in this booklet does not imply approval or recommendation of the advertisers by the Trust, nor does the Trust necessarily support the product advertised.
Booklet ref: TW/05 002 004
Review date: June 2026
Publication date: June 2024
The Hospital would like to thank RNS Publications for publishing this information and the following pages contain some features from services o ering their help at this time.
Whilst the Hospital is grateful of their support it does not endorse or recommend any of the services that they provide.
�\\ bereavement ,�port network
stopping mail
STOPPING JUNK MAIL
It is distressing to deal with a bereavement and unsolicited mail can be insensitive and destructive during a grieving process.
By scanning the below QR code on your phone or visiting www.stopmail.co.uk, we are able to securely share this information with mailing organisations and under the Data Protection Act the information will not be used for any other purpose.
Other benefits reduce the possibility of identity fraud, such as assumed identity and you will only have to supply the information once.
