How can other family members and friends support me?

How can other family members and friends support me?

Bereaved parents often find it difficult to talk about their grief and to ask for help or support. You can share this page with family and friends to guide them on how they may be able to support you.

What do I say?

Often people are worried about saying the right or wrong thing to a bereaved parent. Acknowledging their bereavement and saying “I am sorry” as soon as possible, or saying “I don’t know what to say” is better than avoiding the subject completely.

Be guided by the individual, some parents wish to talk about their child, others may prefer not to. Use the child’s name and don’t be afraid to share any memories you may have. Don’t assume to know how they feel or what they need.

Be patient with them. Bereaved parents experience a whole range of emotions and it may sometimes feel like you can’t say or do anything right. Knowing you are still there to support them when they are ready, whether that is in weeks, months, or years is important.

What can I do?

Ask the parent what they need and be honest with them and yourself about what support you can offer.

Practical support, such as preparing a meal, offering lifts to school or appointments, and finding information can be very helpful for some families. Emotional support such as, listening, giving a hug and, remembering special days and anniversaries is just as important.