FLOWERS, CHOCOLATES, AND THE HEART OF FENG SHUI

Written By Kim Klein

There is a certain holiday, all pink and red, wine and roses, Hallmark cards and hearts And while many people love this day, it seems that oftentimes their partners block it from their minds until the drive home, and then, a quick stop at the supermarket where they luckily pick up one of the last bouquets of mixed flowers, a rather generic greeting card and maybe even a box of those horrible store-bought chocolates Yes, you know the ones

If you’re in a loving relationship, it’s a day to show your partner appreciation, to get romantic To turn your back on the day-to-day responsibilities and small irritants and revel in each other’s love and admiration But if you’re single, whether by choice or by circumstance, it can be a rather dreaded occasion as you sit home downing a pint of Ben and Jerry’s Chunky Monkey and watch reruns of Sex and the City

Being somewhat of a non-conformist, I by no means believe that everyone should be in a relationship that entails “till death do us part.” But for those of you that are in a relationship and feel it could stand a little improvement (and don’t kid yourself, all relationships could use a little key in the ignition now and then) or for those of you looking for love, keep reading.

In Feng Shui, where our environment mirrors our lives, we want it to look it's very best We want it clean, happy, filled with items we love, items that have a purpose and that serve us well

We want to be able to relax, feel comfortable, to feel at “home ”

Our home in Feng Shui is divided into several life areas, and one of those areas rules the “romance” area, as does our bedroom There are specific guidelines for adding or removing items in this area to attract or maintain a wonderful relationship

They make perfect sense when you stop and think about them

If you’re looking to attract a partner, you’ll want to make sure that your bedroom is ready for two You’ll want to have two nightstands (they do not have to match but should be of equal size), and two table lamps (again, of equal size to promote equality) and you’ll want to balance the yin and yang.

That means not too masculine and not too feminine. If you’re unsure how to do this, get inspiration from your favorite hotel rooms (I’m talking the Santa Barbara Biltmore people, okay, that’s my favorite, you can choose your own).

Google them.

Copy them

Add some of your personality and make it your sanctuary But notice how most of them are nonbinary - they feel comfortable with whoever is staying there

If your bedroom is too feminine, with lots of pastels, lace, teddy bears on the bed, one little night table, and one small reading lamp, you’re basically saying that you’re happy with what you have and maybe not ready for a relationship.

Now, if your bedroom is too masculine, still sporting a ratty old sleeping bag as your comforter, there is a naked girl auto shop calendar adorning your wall, and a trophy fish hanging proudly over the bed, it might be time to change things up! Trust me on this. The idea here is to make someone feel at home and comfortable in your space

Some more tips:

Add items in pairs, use the most luxurious linens you can afford, remove the TV, or at least put it behind closed doors or cover at night, remove items from under the bed, don’t sleep under heavy beams, and as much as you might not like me saying this, if you have a King size bed, consider a Queen Much better Feng Shui Contact me and I’ll tell you why

If you’re currently in a relationship look at this room with fresh eyes.

Does it best serve both of you?

Do you both feel comfortable, and enjoy the colors, and the art? You both live here and you should both love it.

In Feng Shui, bedrooms are best used for sleep and intimacy They are not to be used as workspaces, exercise rooms, or catch all’s

Clear out any clutter and make this space as extraordinary as you would like your relationship to be

Unfortunately, we tend to pay more attention to the rooms in our homes that are public spaces and neglect the areas that should be our private retreat

We spend the most amount of concentrated time in our bedrooms, we sleep here, heal here, and love here

Clear out any clutter and make this space as extraordinary as you would like your relationship to be Unfortunately, we tend to pay more attention to the rooms in our homes that are public spaces and neglect the areas that should be our private retreat. We spend the most amount of concentrated time in our bedrooms, we sleep here, heal here, and love here.

When most of us think of romance we are usually transported to a place with soft music, candlelight, fire in the fireplace, beautifully set tables, and a delicious aromatic meal, possibly by the sea. This is just one example of how sensitive we are to our surroundings and how much they affect our thoughts, moods, and actions. Work to recreate this ambiance in your own home.

Let’s try treating ourselves like the gifts we are, every day, all year long We all need love, to give love, and to get love So, make room for that special someone, make room for yourself, and treat each other like every day is Valentine’s Day

Klein is a Life Coach, Certified Holistic Health Coach, Certified Feng Shui Practitioner, and author. She is the founder of Kim Klein Life Coaching and Wabi-Sabi Women and is the author of Damn, the Pusherman ~ Sugar, The Legal Drug that is Keeping You Sick and Fat, and Nine Degrees North, a young adult fiction novel. https://kimkleincoaching.com/ https://www.facebook.com/groups/boomerwomen/ https://www.linkedin.com/in/kimberklein/ kimberjklein@gmail.com