Black & Pink News, Vol 9, Issue 4—July/August 2018

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July 2018

by Earl P. (AK)


‘In Your Skin’ by Christian Bendayan


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A message from Dominique... Hello family,

I’m sitting in my car listening to Fantasia’s version of the song “You Are Always On My Mind”. It’s very appropriate for there my mind has been the last six months. This ride of being at the head of this organization is something I couldn’t have planned for—but it’s been amazing. As we think back on Pride month, more than ever what Black & Pink stands for and who are are evolving as is at the forefront of my mind. I think of the evolution of my understanding of Pride. Coming out at 14 years old in Omaha, NE— my exposure to queer culture was minimal. Honestly it was going to Prison that opened my mind to the spectrum of queerness. The Queens walking the yard, the trade

pretending they weren’t living for us lol. My good Judy Carla was transgender. I remember when she explained that to me and at 19 I really didn’t understand but she was my sister so if she wanted to be referred to as she then that’s what we were going to do. I often advocated for her with staff and the administration. I even went toe to toe with her husband who was being too rough with her. Prison taught me that Pride meant unity. We ate together, we laughed together and cried together. Group survival. I was shocked when I came home in 2009 and realized that Pride in the community was a different creature. Bars, parades and cliques. Where was the solidarity? I think that’s why I joined our Pride organization here in Omaha. I wanted to build the

unity I experienced inside. It never quite came together. However, I’m grateful for the experience and introduction to non profit and organizing it gave me. I wouldn’t be where I am today without it. So for Pride month I ask y’all to lean on each other. Stand closer together. Find strength in each other. That’s what Pride is about. Women of color and drag queens in the streets saying no more shoulder to shoulder changing the world for us. Queer folks continue to shape the world whether it be outside the walls or inside. We are change makers. We are revolutionaries. We are Pride. Pride exists because of a woman. Pride exists because of a black woman. Pride exists because black trans woman. Pride exists because of a black trans woman who was a sex worker. Pride exists because of a black, bisexual trans woman who was a sex worker that threw a brick at a cop. Pride exists because of a black, bisexual trans woman, who was a sex worker, that put herself on the front lines of a revolution - regardless of the consequences to herself. Don’t lose this month in rainbow capitalism and unabashed racism because the privilege of being white while queer. Queerness doesn’t cure white guilt and racism. If you aren’t supporting the queer people of color, trans woman, and queer sex workers, you aren’t celebrating pride, you are celebrating rainbow capitalism and police brutality. Marsha P. Johnson gave us this season, make her proud.

Dominique


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In This Issue News you can use The Myth of PREA Zero Tolerance in Texas Prisons pages 5, 10-16 Jurors Thought a Gay Man Would Enjoy Prison. They Sent Him to Death Row Instead. pages 6-7 Victory in Missouri! pages 8-9 Call for submissions and interviews page 17

Black & Pink family Letters pages 18-38 Poetry pages 20, 22-23, 25, 31-33, 36, 37 Submit to Black & Pink! page 39

Black & Pink News Black & Pink Hotline The hotline phone number is (531) 600-9089. The hotline will be available Sundays, 1-5 p.m. (Eastern Standard Time) for certain. You can call at other times, as well, and we will do our best to answer your calls as often as possible. We are sorry that we can only accept prepaid calls at this time. The purposes of the hotline are: Supportive listening: Being in prison is lonely, as we all know. The hotline is here for supportive listening so you can just talk to someone about what is going on in your life. Organizing: If there are things going on at your prison—lockdowns, guard harassment, resistance, or anything else that should be shared with the public—we can help spread the word.

June/July 2018 work toward the abolition of the prison-industrial complex (PIC) is rooted in the experiences of currently and formerly incarcerated people. We are outraged by the specific violence of the PIC towards LGBTQ people, and we respond through advocacy, education, direct service, and organizing. Black & Pink is proudly a family of people of all races and ethnicities. About Black & Pink News Since 2007, Black & Pink free world volunteers have pulled together a monthly newspaper, composed primarily of material written by our family’s incarcerated members. In response to letters we receive, we send the newspaper to more prisoners every month! Black & Pink News currently reaches more than 9,400 prisoners!

Give us a call! (531) 600-9089 Sundays, 1-5 p.m. EST

We look forward to hearing from you! This is our first attempt at this so please be patient with us as we work it all out. We will not be able to answer every call, but we will do our best. We apologize to anyone who has been trying to get through to the hotline with no success. We are still working out the system. Thank you for being understanding. Restrictions: The hotline is not a number to call about getting on the penpal list or to get the newspaper. The hotline is not a number to call for sexual or erotic chatting. The hotline is not a number for getting help with your current court case; we are not legal experts. Statement of Purpose Black & Pink is an open family of LGBTQ prisoners and “free world” allies who support each other. Our

Disclaimer The ideas and opinions expressed in Black & Pink News are solely those of the authors and artists and do not necessarily reflect the views of Black & Pink. Black & Pink makes no representations as to the accuracy of any statements made in Black & Pink News, including but not limited to legal and medical information. Authors and artists bear sole responsibility for their work. Everything published in Black & Pink News is also on the internet—it can be seen by anyone with a computer. By sending art or written work to “Newspaper Submissions,” you are agreeing to have it published in Black & Pink News and on the internet. In order to respect our members’ privacy, we publish only first names and state locations. We may edit submissions to fit our anti-oppression values and/or based on our own editing guidelines.


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August 2018 (United States)

August 2018

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of Fidel Castro becomes 13 Birthday 14 India (1926), leader in Cuban independent from

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revolt begins 22 Slave Haitian Revolution

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ratified (1920), permitted women to vote

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“I Don’t Believe You, So You Might as Well Get Used to It” —The Myth of PREA Zero Tolerance in Texas Prisons Excerpts from a July 2018 report by Trans Pride Initiative Trans Pride Initiative, based in concerns about PREA ever being Dallas, Texas, “empowers trans and implemented effectively in a retribgender nonconforming persons to utive for-proft confnement system. The title of this report incorporise above social barriers to equal healthcare, housing, employment, rates a statement made to one of our correspondents reporting sexand education.” tpride.org ual abuse in a Texas prison. In the The intent of the Prison Rape Texas Department of Criminal JusElimination Act (PREA) is to pre- tice (TDCJ) system, the PREA convent, detect, and respond to sexual cept of “zero tolerance” is simply a abuse in confnement. These stan- means of covering up and denying dards are far from perfect in con- abuse: “The Texas Department of ception, and farther in implementa- Criminal Justice (TDCJ) has zero tion. Trans Pride Initiative (TPI) has tolerance for sexual abuse and sex-

ual harassment and requires all allegations of sexual abuse and sexual harassment to be thoroughly investigated”; this is the template-based response to every report of sexual abuse and sexual harassment in TDCJ. This statement is a sham nod to PREA compliance that belies a system that not only fails to thoroughly investigate abuse, it also uses information reported to endanger survivors in an effort to discourage further reporting.

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Jurors Thought a Gay Man Would Enjoy Prison. They Sent Him to Death Row Instead. By Jordan Smith The Intercept, June 13 2018 It was snowing heavily on the evening of March 8, 1992, when Charles Rhines used a key to let himself into the closed Dig ’Em Donuts shop on West Main Street in Rapid City, South Dakota. He’d been fired from the shop a few weeks earlier, but he’d kept a key. Using a flashlight, he made his way to the store’s office to steal whatever money he could find. But he was interrupted when a courier he knew from the shop, Donnivan Schaeffer, entered the office. Rhines pulled a black-handled buck knife from his bag and attacked Schaeffer, stabbing him three times. Rhines was convicted of murdering Schaeffer the following year and sentenced to death. But lawyers appointed to handle his case say that the sentence was tainted and should be overturned. Specifically, they argue that Rhines, who is gay, was discriminated against when anti-gay bias infected the jury room, violating Rhines’s right to an impartial jury and due process. Lawyers for the state say that’s nonsense and the heinousness of the crime was what sent Rhines to death row. So far, the courts have sided with South Dakota. Rhines’s lawyers have asked the U.S. Supreme Court to intervene; on June 14, the justices are slated to decide whether to do so. There were signs early on that the jurors deciding whether Rhines should be sentenced to life in prison or to death might have been considering more than the facts of the case before them. During deliberations, the panel sent a note out to the judge.

They had a list of pointed questions about what life in prison would mean. Would Rhines have a cellmate? Would he be allowed to “create a group of followers or admirers”? Would he be allowed to “have conjugal visits”? They apologized if any of the questions were “inappropriate,” but indicated that they were important to their decision-making. The judge declined to answer, telling the jurors that all they needed to know was in the jury instructions they’d received. Eight hours later, they sentenced Rhines to death. In the intervening years, Rhines appealed his conviction on various claims — including that his lawyers had provided ineffective assistance of counsel — but it wasn’t until late 2016 that the newly appointed federal capital defenders found the jury note and realized its significance. “That jury note jumped out at us,” said Shawn Nolan, head of the capital habeas unit of the Federal Community Defender Office in Philadelphia (often appointed to handle capital litigation in states like South Dakota, where there is no local capital habeas unit). “It was pretty glaring that there was some anti-gay bias going on in the jury room.” The lawyers went out to interview the jurors. What they learned, Nolan said, was “kind of horrifying.” One said the jurors knew that Rhines was gay “and thought that he shouldn’t be able to spend his life with men in prison.” A second recalled another juror making a comment that sentencing Rhines to life in prison would be “sending him where he wants to go.” A third said “there was

lots of discussion of homosexuality” in the jury room. “There was a lot of disgust. This is a farming community,” the juror said. “There were a lot of folks who were like, ‘Ew, I can’t believe that.’” Ordinarily, the law does not allow for a conviction or sentence to be overturned based on what took place in the jury room. It’s known as the no-impeachment rule, designed to protect the basic integrity of the jury system. But in this case, Nolan argues, the juror misconduct violated constitutional protections — so the rule shouldn’t apply. In a 2017 case known as Peña-Rodriguez v. Colorado, the U.S. Supreme Court said something similar. In that case, after Miguel Angel Peña-Rodriguez was convicted of unlawful sexual conduct and harassment, two jurors came forward to tell his lawyer that another juror had made racially charged statements about Peña-Rodriguez and an alibi witness, commenting about the likelihood that Peña-Rodriguez was guilty and the witness was not credible because both were Hispanic. Peña-Rodriguez sought a new trial based on the jury misconduct, but the courts said no because of the no-impeachment rule. The U.S. Supreme Court disagreed. “A constitutional rule that racial bias in the justice system must be addressed — including, in some instances, after the verdict has been entered — is necessary to prevent a systemic loss of confidence in jury verdicts, a confidence that is a central premise of the Sixth Amendment trial right,” the court

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Jurors Thought Gay Man Would Enjoy Prison continued from page 6 wrote. As such, the court concluded that “where a juror makes a clear statement that indicates he or she relied on racial stereotypes or animus to convict a criminal defendant, the Sixth Amendment requires that the no-impeachment rule give way” so that the court can consider whether the misconduct tainted the promise of a fair trial. It was on the basis of this ruling — along with a 2017 opinion in which the Supreme Court held that the law is meant to punish “people for what they do, not who they are” — that Nolan and his team last year sought again to challenge Rhines’s sentence. “To allow a juror to vote for a man’s death sentence on the basis of anti-gay animus and stereotypes unquestionably violates the Sixth and Fourteenth Amendments,” Rhines’s lawyers wrote in their pleading to the Supreme Court. “The logic of Peña-Rodriguez cannot apply to racial bias in jury factfinding without applying to capital jury sentencing and comparably dangerous prejudice.” The state of South Dakota disagrees, arguing that the alleged anti-gay bias is not at all like the racial bias demonstrated in the Peña-Rodriguez case. The Supreme Court’s ruling was “narrowly tailored” only for cases where a conviction was based on race and “did not create an exception for alleged homosexual bias,” Assistant Attorney General Paul Swedlund wrote in a court filing. Part of the Supreme Court’s logic in Peña-Rodriguez was that racism had played a distinct role in “thwarting aspirations of equality” in the system. The same could not be

said for anti-gay bias, Swedlund argued. Our history is “not replete with ‘stark and unapologetic’ anti-homosexual jury verdicts. No wars have been fought over it. No nationwide programs have been perpetrated for the enslavement or eradication of homosexuals,” he wrote. “No politician has ever proposed constructing a wall to keep homosexuals out of the country. The acceptance of equality in regard to non-racial distinctions has occurred largely peaceably and with comparatively greatly less controversy.” Chase Strangio, a staff attorney with the LGBT Project of the American Civil Liberties Union, [who was Chelsea Manning’s lawyer] agrees that there is “nothing akin to anti-black racism in the United States in the criminal legal system.” And he notes that the law treats race differently than it does sexual orientation in the context of equal protection, reviewing claims that invoke racism with the highest level of scrutiny. “That said, I think that the Sixth Amendment right that Peña-Rodriguez discusses should apply in general and that any bias is a significant problem. Just because there is a very distinct and deeply insidious anti-black and racist bias in the criminal legal system doesn’t mean there’s not a whole bunch of other biases that are also problematic and have infected and infused the operation of the system as a whole,” he said. “And anti-LGBT bias is one of those. Absolutely.” Indeed, the law has long discrim-

inated against the LGBT community — gay sex was criminalized until 2003; LGBT people have been discriminated against in accommodations and in military service. It wasn’t until 2015 that gay marriage was finally legalized. Anti-gay bias infiltrates every aspect of the criminal justice system. According to the results of a landmark survey led by Lambda Legal, 19 percent of nearly 1,000 individuals interviewed about their interactions with the court system between 2007 and 2012 reported that a judge, attorney, or other court employee made negative comments about a person’s sexual orientation, gender identity, or gender expression. Sixteen percent said their own sexual orientation or gender identity was raised when it was not relevant. Twelve percent of respondents who had served on a jury reported hearing “discriminatory language about sexual orientation or gender identity.” Strangio notes that Rhines’s case wasn’t even about sex, so there is no reason the issue should have come up at all. “It’s hard to imagine how there’s not bias just by evidence of the fact that this was being considered,” he said. “If this was a heterosexual defendant in a robbery-murder, would there be any mention of this? No.” “The law certainly has room to recognize that anti-LGBT bias in the criminal legal system taints the constitutional guarantees that criminal defendants should absolutely be entitled to, particularly capital defendants who are literally facing the deprivation of their lives,” Strangio said. “I hope it is troubling to the Supreme Court that someone would be executed under these circumstances.”


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Myth of PREA Zero Tolerance in Texas Prisons: IV. Recommendations Recommendations continued from page 5 Our position at TPI is that reform of the prison system as it exists today will not achieve sufcient change to end the harm done by this system, and many changes that are presented as “reforms” serve to increase harm rather than reduce it. Reform measures, in spite of the benefcent intent that is regularly expressed, seldom truly address the underlying causes of social harm. However, we recognize that some change may be helpful in the short term while not causing an increase in harm long term. PREA has the potential to help in this way if it begins to address the culture of oppression and dehumanization rampant in our prison systems. Keeping in mind that the ultimate goal of ending the carceral system that has evolved in this country and in the State of Texas may not necessarily be reinforced if reform advocacy is carried out carefully and with critical assessment, we propose the following recommendations that we hope will provide some relief of the harms caused by our current justice system while avoiding the tendency of many reforms to expand the system and it’s harmful impacts on our communities. We recognize that many items in this list were inspired by those proposed by Lydon (2015, pp. 6–11); we also recognize that this list—nor any list of recommendations—will be complete until this system is abolished. “The success of the PREA standards in combating sexual abuse in confinement facilities will depend on effective agency and facility leadership, and the development of an agency culture that prioritizes efforts to combat sexual abuse. Effective leadership and culture cannot, of course, be directly mandated by rule. Yet implementation of the standards will help foster a change in culture by institutionalizing policies and practices that bring these concerns to the fore.” —National Standards to Prevent, Detect, and Respond to Prison Rape, 77 Fed. Reg. 37105 (June 20, 2012) (final rule 28 CFR 115).

Reduce Incarceration Recommendation 1: Improve social support networks. The State of Texas should provide beter and more comprehensive social support structures for marginalized populations. One study specifcally focusing on LGBTQ persons notes that nearly 20% of LGBTQ persons in prison experienced housing instability (identifed as homeless or transient) prior to incarceration, more than one-third were unemployed, and a high percentage were involved in underground economy work for survival (Lydon, 2015, pp. 20–22). Substantial changes that work toward alleviating poverty and social marginalization, we believe, would do far more than any prison reform measure to reduce violence and abuse in the prison system. Recommendation 2: Remove incentives for incarceration. System changes that work toward ending the for-proft and retributive justice system that simply responds to social problems by locking people up should be prioritized. The current system rewards both for-proft corporations and governmental entities for keeping more people locked up for longer periods. All fnancial incentives that encourage incarceration in both private and public sectors should be reversed so that The Myth of PREA Zero Tolerance in Texas Prisons

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the incentives discourage incarceration. Active pursuit of alternatives to incarceration such as community-based transformative justice programs that strive to actually heal harm and violence and address the social causes of violence before it occurs should instead be the focus of funding.

Address Trial, Sentencing, and Parole Issues Recommendation 3: Increase funding for public defenders. Marginalized persons experiencing housing and employment instability are disproportionately affected by the justice system in part due to the lack of appropriate representation in the courts. This is even more keenly experienced by members of LGBTQ communities, where limited options may mean few if any available atorneys understand how discrimination creates marginalization in the world and in the judicial process for LGBTQ persons. Increased funding should result in increased staff and atorneys, allowing public defenders to more effectively address the needs of their clients, including trans and queer clients. Recommendation 4: Shift parole away from enforcement toward support. This includes ending rearrest for technical violations that are not new criminal charges. The function of parole should be shifted to near exclusive focus on assisting persons released from prison overcome challenges and successfully identify and access housing, education, training, employment, healthcare, and other social support so they have opportunities to participate in society without resorting to actions that cause social harm. Recommendation 5: Eliminate cash bail requirements. The requirements to post cash bail are inherently discriminatory and need to be eliminated in favor of support systems that will assist defendants make their court dates and avoid problems that participation in court mandated activities can create. Cash bail requirements disproportionately affect LGBTQ persons, especially LGBTQ persons of color, who tend to have less access to fnancial support.

Prison Culture Issues Recommendation 6: Reward accountability. Our experience shows that the TDCJ system very often rewards—with career advancement, fnancial benefts, and recognition—those who cover up issues of violence rather than those who expose issues of violence. Exposing problems in prison systems is often viewed negatively and as damaging to authority and security. When issues of violence by TDCJ staff are addressed, they generally target only single “bad actors” rather than examine and address systemic problems that create and enable those bad actors. It is imperative that the system be changed to reward accountability and transparency. Recommendation 7: Reduce staf trafcking in contraband. Although prison administrators make concerted efforts to blame the presence of contraband in prisons exclusively on incarcerated persons, contraband often—perhaps mostly—enters facilities with the complicity of prison staff. This problem directly and indirectly increases the level and incidence of violence against persons in custody. In large measure, the contraband problems would not exist without the active support and involvement of staff. Recommendation 8: Pay wages to incarcerated persons. The lack of pay in Texas prisons is frst and foremost an issue of modern slavery and should be abolished for that reason alone. There is also a high incidence of trading sex and other favors for food, supplies, commissary items, and protection The Myth of PREA Zero Tolerance in Texas Prisons

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within the system, so the slave labor system that severely disadvantages those without outside support helps drive prison violence. This disproportionately affects LGBTQ persons with less access to outside fnancial support. Our correspondents have noted providing sex for writing supplies and stamps to simply be able to communicate with outside friends and advocates. It is not a great leap to conclude that the system itself is guilty of coercing persons in their custody into providing sex and other favors in exchange for survival supplies. Puting persons in an environment where they receive no compensation for work but are assessed fees for surviving is barbarous and inhumane. Paying a decent wage to incarcerated persons for the labor they contribute to maintaining the prisons and working in production will help eliminate the enormous disparities experienced by those without outside fnancial support. It will also help alleviate the state’s continued active participation in the maintenance of a slave population. Recommendation 9: Eliminate blanket bans on touching and all sexual contact. Confning human beings in conditions that atempt to ban all personal contact is emotionally abusive and creates an environment where nearly everyone breaks the rules at some level, giving staff ubiquitous cause for select and arbitrary disciplinary sanctions. In one example, one of our correspondents was even given a disciplinary case for hugging a friend who was being transferred to another facility. These types of cases are often used disproportionately against LGBTQ persons due to widespread homophobia and transphobia in the prison systems. Recommendation 10: Eliminate anti-transgender policies and practices that increase risk of violence. This includes allowing all transgender persons the same access to clothing, commissary, and grooming options that are allowed to cisgender persons based on gender identity. Implement policy that encourages use of afrming names and pronouns for transgender persons and that disciplines consistent and intentional use of non-afrming names and pronouns. There is no need nor is there a legitimate security or other penological purpose for denying access to such items and identity afrmation; the practice has no purpose other than dehumanization. In fact, providing these serves a penological interest by reducing mental health issues and increasing self-esteem and willingness to work toward success on release. Recommendation 11: Eliminate barriers to healthcare. Expand healthcare access to provide the full range of options considered medically necessary healthcare treatment for transgender (and all other) persons. Eliminate the “Health Care Fee” charged to persons in TDCJ custody under Texas Government Code 501.063 for accessing health care. This is especially egregious since almost all labor performed while in the system earns no pay.

Policy and Procedural Issues Recommendation 12: Eliminate solitary confnement. Although TDCJ claims to have eliminated solitary confnement, it continues in practice. Single-cell housing in administrative segregation is still managed by the restrictive practices of disciplinary housing, and constitute solitary in all but name. Safekeeping persons on TDCJ’s Telford Unit have been moved into the former administrative segregation building, and they have been locked down for long periods of time in conditions that are very similar to solitary confnement. Transgender persons are also more likely to be placed in solitary confnement “for their own protection” when fling for an investigation into an incident of violence, sometimes spending a month or more in isolation, even if placement in solitary severely The Myth of PREA Zero Tolerance in Texas Prisons

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impacts their mental health and they request not to be isolated. We have received numerous non sequitur explanations from TDCJ staff that this is not solitary because it is not for punishment. Solitary confnement is housing as a single occupant with limited human interaction for 22 or more hours a day, regardless of the purpose of that solitary confnement. Recommendation 13: Institute independent grievance oversight. The grievance process at TDCJ is highly problematic and easily manipulated by persons in power at the units. Suggestions from advocates include establishing an Ofce of Independent Ombudsman or expanding the Texas Juvenile Justice Department Ofce of Independent Ombudsman to review grievances not handled at the unit level. Regardless of specifcs, the grievance process must be made more accountable through strong independent oversight with input from advocates with a vested interest in eliminating abuse and violence in prisons. Recommendation 14: End abusive interpretation of PREA § 115.42(g). Clearly defne that placing transgender persons together in a cell does not in itself infringe on prohibitions against “dedicated facilities” under PREA § 115.42(g) and may be the best way to house some transgender persons. Transgender persons should always be provided this option for housing where available.

Searches Recommendation 15: End routine strip searches. TDCJ and many prison systems engage in routine daily—sometimes multiple times a day—strip searches of persons in certain custody levels. These are conducted so often and unnecessarily that they exceed any legitimate security or penological interest. Unnecessary routine strip searches are a form of sexual abuse and have a disproportionately negative affect on LGBTQ persons, particularly those who have suffered sexual trauma and those for whom such searches increase the likelihood of additional victimization by others. This is especially problematic for transgender persons housed in gender segregated facilities that do not conform to their gender. Recommendation 16: Follow PREA search best practice guidelines. The four options for transgender and intersex persons are: 1) searches are conducted only by medical staff; 2) pat searches of adult inmates are conducted by female staff only, especially given there is no prohibition on the pat searches female staff can perform (except in juvenile facilities); 3) asking inmates/ residents/detainees to identify the gender of staff with whom they would feel most comfortable conducting the search, and 4) searches are conducted in accord with the inmate’s gender identity.

PREA Audit Reports Recommendation 17: Require external comments on audit reports where a potential confict of interest exists. PREA auditor certifcation allows employees of correctional agencies to conduct audits, and this is a potential confict of interest with the Auditor Code of Conduct requirement that “PREA auditors must be independent, objective, and credible in evaluating the extent to which confnement facilities comply with the PREA Standards” (PREA Management Ofce, 2017, p. 8). Reports for all audits where the lead auditor is a current correctional agency employee or has been an employee of any correctional agency in the past 10 years should be required to include review by an external advocacy agency.

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PREA and Transportation Department Abuses Recommendation 18: Extend PREA standards to transportation. TDCJ appears to not hold the Transportation Department to PREA standards because the standards are facility-based, a loophole the agency is unethically allowing. This is very likely a problem, or potential problem, in all prison systems. The existence of this loophole, however, does not abrogate agency responsibilities under section 115.11 to have—as an agency—“zero tolerance toward all forms of sexual abuse and sexual harassment.”

PREA Confdentiality Recommendation 19: Confdential correspondence for anti-violence advocates. Under PREA Standard 115.53, facilities “shall provide inmates with access to outside victim advocates for emotional support services . . . of local, state, or national victim advocacy or rape crisis organizations . . . in as confdential a manner as possible.” TDCJ and all jails and prisons in Texas should implement a class of confdential correspondence so that community advocates and sex abuse survivor advocates are not required to have an atorney on staff to receive confdential mail from incarcerated persons. Recommendation 20: Keep reports of violence confdential. PREA § 115.61(b) notes that “[a]part from reporting to designated supervisors or ofcials, staff shall not reveal any information related to a sexual abuse report to anyone other than to the extent necessary.” It is common practice for guards and administration to disclose, directly or indirectly, that someone reported violence or details about the report. Privacy is not respected; one of our correspondents, a transgender woman being transported to a SANE exam after being raped, experienced guards yelling across the yard that she was “going to get her but checked.” Not only does that disrespect personal privacy rights, it also increases endangerment by announcing she reported a rape. Information is passed to trustees or SSIs (staff support inmates), who provide the information to associates, endangering the lives of anyone fling a report. Staff and investigators discuss reports in non-private setings, such as at a distance with a loud voice through a cell door where others can easily hear, most likely to discourage further reports and encourage the case to be dropped.

PREA Data Collection and Disclosure Recommendation 21: Track and make available disciplinary cases against survivors. Track disciplinary cases received by all who are associated with reports of violence to identify potential retaliation. The cases should be available to victim advocacy organizations on request. Recommendation 22: Monitor transgender housing practices. Collect aggregate data noting the number of persons in the prison system identifed as transgender, the gender of the housing, and the presence or absence of genital reconstruction surgery. Unit level data must be provided to PREA auditors as part of the facility assessment, and audit interviewees must be clearly invited to discuss their housing as appropriate or inappropriate to their gender with PREA auditors. Aggregate data should be available to community advocate organizations on request. Recommendation 23: Track persons with non-substantiated reports of violence. Far too many incidents of sexual violence are found unsubstantiated or unfounded. Each person with an The Myth of PREA Zero Tolerance in Texas Prisons

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unsubstantiated or unfounded case needs to be tracked for subsequent incidents of violence of any kind, as well as subsequent disciplinary cases, to identify retaliation and repeat endangerment. This should somewhat encourage prisons and jails to actually prevent abuse instead of covering it up. The data should be available to victim advocacy organizations on request. Recommendation 24: Transparent incident data. Make information about all incidents of violence available to the public on a quarterly basis, with appropriate privacy protections in place. Recommendation 25: Transparent segregation. Provide aggregate data for all persons placed in involuntary segregation due to reporting violence, along with the length of stay and subsequent housing placement over the next 60 days after release from segregation, to victim advocacy organizations on request. Recommendation 26: Transparent reporting of sexual violence. All reports of sexual violence, along with the resolution or investigation status, should be made available to external advocacy organizations on a quarterly basis (appropriately redacted for privacy).

PREA Prevention and Protection Recommendation 27: Allow housing for safety. Incarcerated LGBTQ persons should have the option of being housed with other LGBTQ persons in their facility on a cell or pod level (less than 15 persons). Accommodating such should not be used to justify construction of new facilities. We also note that it is common for prison staff to place LGBTQ persons in cells with others antagonistic to the demographic, endangering their health and safety, while threatening to cite them with disciplinary cases for refusing to accept their endangerment. 13 Persons identifed as LGBTQ should be allowed to refuse housing that puts their health and safety in danger without receiving disciplinary cases. Prioritize housing of transgender persons by gender identity rather than by forced gender assignment at birth. All housing that is not provided based on gender identity must be justifed. Incarcerated persons must be allowed to specify their housing preference and have that preference given serious consideration, even if it seems to differ from their gender identity. Recommendation 28: Provide appropriate benefts access. Provide documentation on request by advocacy organizations for an individual in any type of segregated housing concerning access to programs, privileges, education, and work opportunities to track compliance with PREA § 115.43(b). Recommendation 29: Ensure staf accountability to endangerment. Hold all staff accountable, with clear paths to termination, for all violence against LGBTQ persons.

13. Lydon (2015, p. 5) notes that “Prisoners are over three times more likely to have commited sexual assaults on LGBTQ prisoners than prison staff. However, of those who report having been sexually assaulted by a prisoner, 76% also report that prison staf intentionally placed them in situations where they would be at high risk of sexually assault from another prisoner� (emphasis added).

The Myth of PREA Zero Tolerance in Texas Prisons

continued on page 16 30


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June/July 2018

PREA Incident Responses, Investigation, and Training choosing to not report, not the percentage of incidents that went unreported. In confnement Recommendation 30: End re-victimization of violence survivors. End the practice of re-victimizing environments, just as in the free world, many survivors experience repeat occurrences of sexual survivors of violence them solitary confnement absolutely necessary; stop abuse, and that mayby beplacing more true in in confnement where one iswhen oftennot marked as an easy target for endangering survivors placing them in the housing situation of with abusers; abuse after an incident, by especially if they do back not report. For same this reason, the percentage individuals acknowledge fully consider a victim’s statements about what will be safe for them; another and stop who do notand report probably represents a very large number of incidents. Corroborating, citing survivors with disciplinary cases to discourage reports of violence. researcher notes sexual assault in prison is about 65% unreported (Martyniuk, 2014, p. 1). Although there may be reasons for incarcerated persons toTPI falsely sexual victimization, the apparent Recommendation 31: Reward full investigation. hasreport recorded many instances where various high percentage of unreported abuse likely does much to offset any level of false reports in steps were taken to obstruct and discourage investigations, some of which were covered in this ascertaining a true picture of sexual abusethat in confnement. We up willand cover somecases of the document. TDCJ appears to have a culture views covering hiding of reasons violencesuch with abuse is not reported later in this document, but there are ample reasons—often created success, and identifcation of problems that need correcting as failure. Such a culture will alwaysorbe exacerbated bypolicy prisonthat operators—for to be low. abusive. Institute encouragesreporting and rewards transparency and full investigation with harm reduction steps to address sexual abuse and other incidents of violence, insteadthe of data stigmatizing If the national data concerning substantiated sexual victimization is appalling, providedthese by andTDCJ rewarding erasure of these issues.orders of magnitude. In fact, TDCJ data more than turns the is eventhe more atrocious by several truth-in-reporting32expectation its head. shown in Table 3, the agency claims 98% to 99% Recommendation : Confrm on training is As implemented. Surveillance video andthat documentation of alltoreports are either or fabrications. For the mostcompliance recent data available needs be available to unsubstantiated advocates to beter monitor that PREA training (covering is actually fscal year 2016), TDCJ shows that out of 1,567 reports of sexual abuse, only 13 were substantiated, implemented. which is TDCJ essentially claiming that only 0.83% of the incidents occurred.

Under PREA, what is sexual abuse? As per the PREA Standards (28 CFR § 115.6), sexual abuse is divided into two types, 1) abuse against an incarcerated or detained person by another incarcerated or detained person, and 2) abuse of an incarcerated or detained person by a staff, contract, or volunteer person. The abuse must be nonconsensual, coerced by overt or implied threats, or enacted against someone who cannot give consent. 1) The frst type includes all contact with the genitals or anus, including penetration by hand, fnger, object, or other instrument. It can also include any other touching directly or though clothing of the “the genitalia, anus, groin, breast, inner thigh, or the butocks of another person, excluding contact incidental to a physical altercation.” 2) The second type includes the same and • “contact between the mouth and any body part where the staff member, contractor, or volunteer has the intent to abuse, arouse, or gratify sexual desire”; • any atempt, threat, or request by the employee or volunteer to engage in any of these actions; TheThe Myth of PREA Zero Tolerance Myth of PREA Zero ToleranceininTexas TexasPrisons Prisons

• any display by the employee or volunteer of “genitalia, butocks, or breast in the presence of an inmate, detainee, or resident”; and • voyeurism.

What is sexual harassment? As per the PREA Standards (28 CFR § 115.6), sexual harassment also has two types, 1) that which is perpetrated by another incarcerated or detained person, and 2) that which is from an employee or volunteer. 1) From others in confnement, it includes: • repeated and unwanted “sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, or verbal comments, gestures, or actions of a derogatory or offensive sexual nature.” 2) From staff, contractors, and volunteers, it includes: • “repeated verbal comments or gestures of a sexual nature” • “demeaning references to gender, sexually suggestive or derogatory comments about body or clothing, or obscene language or gestures.”

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Volume 9, Issue 4

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Call for Submissions: Your experiences

The Marshall Project, a nonprofit news organization focusing on criminal justice issues, is now publishing writing by incarcerated people. We are looking for vivid, surprising nonfiction stories about a specific experience or event that happened to you or that you witnessed inside prison/inside the system; we are NOT looking for fiction, poetry, essays about your criminal case, or argumentative/opinion essays about more abstract issues. WORD COUNT: 1,000 to 1,500 words. COMPENSATION: We will offer a donation of $50 if your submission is published. Please include a filled-out trust fund slip or instructions for adding funds to your account.. Your submission will also be edited and fact-checked. If it is not accepted, it will be returned to you. MAIL TO: The Marshall Project 156 West 56th Street, Suite 701 New York, NY 10019 Or email ehager@themarshallproject.org Thank you!

Journalist seeks trans masculine guys I'm a journalist writing on an in-depth story on the experiences of trans masculine people behind bars, and looking for guys to interview! If you were assigned female at birth but don't identify as a woman -- meaning you identify as a trans man, or non-binary/gender-nonconforming in some other way - I'd love to speak with you. I want the public to understand the specific challenges and struggles faced by incarcerated trans guys, and what can be done to support you or improve your lives. I understand it can be difficult to trust reporters, so I'm happy to provide past samples of my work to folks who are interested, and cover whatever it costs for us to communicate. Thanks so much for considering this! Write me at: Aviva Stahl PO Box 205-329 Brooklyn, NY 11220

Art: Travis White Aviva Stahl is a Brooklyn-based journalist who primarily writes about prisons, national security, and immigration detention. Her work has been published by a number of outlets, including Rolling Stone, the Guardian, the Intercept, Harper’s, Vice Magazine, the Village Voice and many others.


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June/July 2018

Black & Pink News

Letters, Poetry from Our B&P Family Yo Brothers and Sisters of Black and Pink The name is Christian L. AKA Hash. Got the name from a transgender HomeGirl named Anothony Heads AKA Twan who also Gave me yall’s newspaper that I love so much she is also the one who got me to realize I am bISeXuail when It comes to feminine transgender I love that she was able to help me find my self out and Don’t worrie she Does not mind me saying her name in this letter we got such a good close bond She got such a great personality witch brings me to the newsletter of october/November 2017 were it explains what all The sister’s and brother’s have to go through and deal with in prison. I Don’t Know why people have to be so Judgemental they think Just because some is into men that when you come to prison that mean you will want any man and think that your up to do anything. That’s not true Just like straigh people have Their prefrences in women gay people have Their prefrences and they should not be treated like they are Pleasure machine example my Homegirl got a Job working in the kitchen her first Day Their Some Dude that Don’t even Know her never talk to her before ask her “Do you spit or swallow” he treated her like Just because she is gay or into men that she would hop right on that you know she is Human too with

emotions too and she got more self respect then that. I am at the SCIFayette prison and I hang with the transgender’s and gay’s and go to a LGBtQ surport Group and get hell for it. Because no one knows that I’m BI You could not tell by looking at me or talking. the only one that knows is my homegirl who I told I have a crush on and my surport Group this is new to me. But I’m fine with it So to all my brother’s and sister’s out their going through it. Keep on keeping on never give up and fight for what you believe in remember only God can Judge and he loves you. If he didn’t you would not be here remember good Days are coming stay standing and walking tall for your Brother’s and sister’s cause the bigger the surport Group the harder it is for other’s to denia us of our right and freedom of speech. remember when we fall get back up and do it again utell you overcome it. Two is better than one And Three make’s the bond stronger. remember the lord said tho pain might come in the night Joy will come in the morning if you Don’t give up. So when yall go Through all Yall’s trails, and tribulations, Do it with a smile on Yall’s face cause you know the your reward is coming the Day were you will be heard and treated equally. and I want to thank Black and Pink for everything yall Done for us because withoutyall we could not be heard like tay said his voices is are voice. Amen.

And I was wondering If Yall can start sending me the newsletter and put me on the pen-pal program please and Thank You will wait to hear back from Yall GoD Bless Black and Pink and all my brother and sister’s Your’s sincerly Chris L. AKA Hash. To My Beloved Black & Pink Family: Peace & Blessings to all you beautiful souls. My name is Bobbie V. soon to be Arya Serenity. I am presently being held in the Rhode Island Adult Correctional Institution (A.C.I) in Cranston. I am a 5’3”; 145 translatin@ and happy to bring forth some good news from the smallest state in the union. I’ve been reading Black and Pink for many years now and am a very active member in our Providence Rhode Island Chapter and proud to say that this small community has the biggest heart, love an compassion and understanding and were making moves out here slowly yet precise and with that being said the good news is that in the state of Rhode Island at the Rhode Island DOC/ACI I am the first openly transgender woman to transition behind the wall and to my surprise

Share your artwork with the B&P community! see mailing instructions on page 39


Volume 9, Issue 4

I’ve been met with great support by the RI-DOC’s medical staff Dr. Jennifer Clarke, MD MPH and my physician Dr. Radha Sadacharan, MD and will be receiving feminizing hormone therapy April 19th 2018 (estradiol) and hormone blocker (spironolactone). I come to bring this good news to my family not to boast but to bring hope into the hearts of those who live in doubt and are struggling in their transition behind the walls. I read the horrid stories of pain and hate and it’s the struggles and achievements of those who preserved and endured in other prisons that made it possible for me, for it was your cases in the courts that won and your prison system that the RI-DOC went to consult asking how they deal with issues of transitioning in their prison system that has allowed for me here in the RI-DOC to transition with such ease and I am forever grateful and indebted to you all. For those of you who continue to struggle and suffer in silence know that you must never bend that knee in defeat and fight the good fight. Your courage drives me in my activism and advocacy to follow your example in never giving up and to give voice to the voiceless and a face to the faceless. Family I am to parole very soon and will put theory to practice and do the work of and for our people for a true revolutionary is a lover of the people and love you all I do. I’ve been in the states oppressive systems most of my life as many different personalities from orphan to street thug to gang banga to political activist to a transwoman

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who is an ex-gang banga that politicized herself. I am very historically, spiritually and politically conscious and aware of the time of day of which we exist in. I’ve been through the fire of hades since a 3 yr old child beaten; then rapes and given up for adoption at the age of 6; I’ve been homeless without family and true friends; neglected and confused in orphanages, group homes and shelters yet all this hell, all this hurt and pain, all this hate and rage gave me experience and this knowledge (for experience is knowledge) gave me awareness and this awareness gave power to my conscious being to not only want to fight and change and save my life but also yours. This transition into a fiery hot spicy translatin@ is the beginning and end for me, it’s where I start living as the woman I truly am; dedicated to help my people and put an end to my haunting past. I want all you ladies and the greater LGBTQ family out there to know I am here for you. I cry, laugh and love with you all in spirit. I also want you to know we the Providence chapter of Black and Pink need your beauty; strength and intelligence in our community. You’re needed, wanted and loved so if any of you in the LGBTQ community of Black and Pink seek/ need to relocate and seek to build a community with us in Providence, Rhode Island, seek support, new friendships and family and are willing to fight the good fight to help save lives then contact us at: Black and Pink PVD P.O. Box 29444, Providence, Rhode Island 02907. Before I end I want to give a big loving shout out to our national

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director Dominique Morgen. I see you love and to my loving family Danie; Hanna; Trina; MJ; M; Sincere; Bethlehem and AJ and to anyone I may have missed. I love you all, soon the gates of hell will open to let this angel of god do the work of the righteous. Nuff said I’ve spoken. Arya Serenity (Rhode Island) There is a divine ordinance to life that most intellects, whether spiritual, or religious, or just conscientious to the existence of a higher power, fail to understand or acknowledge that the divine ordinance is not hands on regulated by this higher power pertaining to human life. It is governed by the principle of laws of nature and most importantly, the laws of attraction, which governs the karmic aspects of human beings every decision making in life. These natural laws of nature and attraction are what regulates the natural flow of harmony, which we see that is more predominant in the nature occurrence of animals and species who are governed by an unstable flow of migratory behavior or mating. It is human beings necessity to comprehend and try to understand such laws, but however, fail to do so, because it is a human beings nature to label, to identify, which is not the divine harmony or ordinance of nature of attraction. The divine ordinance is perfect in its harmony because the divine entity is magnificent, who instilled his essence within the ordinance to govern the flow of human life. So in essence words such as homosexual,


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Black & Pink News

gay, and lesbian is not the construct of nature. They are only just that, a linguistically design of man’s ability to label social and sexual behavior to identify with it. The laws of nature could be primal, instinctive, and or just for the mere simple fact of pleasure. This behavior is highly noted in many animals such as apes, horses, and a few aquatic animals who will indulge in the laws of attraction for reasons stated above or just out of a mere alignment of nature. The Gods of Greek mythology, some had two sexes and are neither male or female, as well as the most notable Greek god Zeus, known as Jupiter in Roman mythology, was recorded to have once turned to a giant eagle and swooped down from the heavens to take a young boy, who was the most beautiful he saw in the garden.

Black & Pink’s National Director Dominique Morgan sang R&B to a crowd at the Omaha, Nebraska Pride festival wearing a rainbow “Black Lives Matter” shirt! Black & Pink Board members (see picture on page 39) traveled to Omaha in late June to meet, discuss our strengths and room for improvement, and begin to plan for the future of our organization.

It always puzzles me as a mortal god of intellect when one describes the encounter of two human beings of the same sex as abnormal behavior. Nature with many plants and flowers are of both sexes. However, man describes the sexual encounter of two people of the same gender to be identified as homosexual, lesbian, or gay. When in all essence none of which titles actually exist. Because two people of the same sex is a natural facet of the laws of nature or attraction. The divine ordinance has no flaws. I studied species of insect that after mating, the male insect implants a spike-like object in the mating canal of the female to prevent and kill any other anticipated male insect who tries to implant his seed in the female. Humans would function

June/July 2018

almost similar. There would be a natural genetic inability for two of the same gender in any category of mammal, plant, insect, etc… to mate or be able to attract to one another. One may try to argue the fact of free will. However, humans are only able to do what is in their will that is in accordance with the natural divine ordinances of nature and the laws of attraction. Any level of attraction that one indulges in to a grave extent is a sin. Excessive philanderism or promiscuousness with the same gender or not because humans are not to succumb with a lack of discipline to any mortal desire or indulgence whether it is food, conversation, sex, or even idle time. Only the essence through integrity, sacrifice and moral discipline. This is only food forethought to share with the LGBTQ community, that only two governing factors exist in the order of human being. Any social facet is not what or how one should even level themself unless they desire to own the derogatory term used against them as a message of self-awareness and for pride for who they decide to spend their life with. Gary Cooper the Great (Maryland) 2Pac once stated: “with a brain to teach a whole nation.” I used to be called Rosalyn, but I changed it to Alyssa. I have chose to become one of the vanguards of the LGBTQ community with the sole purpose of bringing changed for the LGBTQ community. I also recognize that I will become a target of the American government who will either attempt


Volume 9, Issue 4

or succeed in assassinating me for my political views and activism, but I am willing to become a martyr for the people, especially the LGBTQ community. I am a true soldier of the people, especially the LGBTQ community, who recognizes that in order to put an end to the stigma, we must put an end to the fighting and disagreements amongst the LGBTQ community, and come together in unity and take a stand against the injustice and stigma. The community must fight for equality, freedom, and justice. We must put our boots on the ground and make our voices heard through the world. It’s time we realize that we are a beautiful, unique, and powerful community, but as a community, we must first act like a community, before we can start demanding our respect as a community of LGBTQ. Martin Luther King Jr. is the right man to use as an example. We must move in a peaceful manner and organize peacefully, because physical violence they can handle, but non-physical violence they cannot handle. The government has yet to figure out how to combat nonphysical violence; the silent mind that organizes and plans properly always has the element of surprise. Alyssa, a Maryland prisoner Brothers and Sisters! I'm writing with some encouraging news for everyone. First, let me say that I'm a 42 year old transwoman in the PA DOC. I've written to B+P several times with some letters published. I've been receiving B+P

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for about 5 years and at my previous facility, was sexually assaulted many times. When I did a nearly fatal OD on over 120 pills, I was transferred from a high level to a low level security prison. I haven't received any misconducts since nor sexually assaulted, except for an absence to county. I have a boyfriend who I love unconditionally. He loves me for me and doesn't just want sex. The PA DOC has started monthly transgender video conferences with other PA facilities and transcentral pa as host. The PA DOC has begun allowing HRT for those of us who qualify; as well as providing appropriate "gender" undergarments. The PA DOC is also allowing a community group for the GBLTQI - inmates. We've recently begun ours with about a dozen inmates. Just write to the facility's program manager to get the ball rolling. I personally am working with our Chaplain to begin wiccan services and studies. He found us a High Priest who is interested in volunteering. This is a big accomplishment because though the US Supreme Court recognizes the wiccan faith, no facility I've been at had any services or studies. With all I'm trying to organize here at SCIRetreat, I'm hoping to join some committees and be a CPS (Certified Peer Specialist). I'm on the next training list. We've also been lucky to have had a yoga instructor interested in coming in twice a week to teach a 3 month class. Again, I was lucky to be in the first class which is about to end so that a 2nd group can learn yoga. However, I am working with the instructor and the administration to allow the 1st group graduates an hour or two gym time set aside just for us. Our cells are too small and it's too cold to

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practice outside at yard and we can't practice at the gym at night because of sport games. I'm very proud the PA DOC has given us so much support and pray they continue to do so. Sadly, a week ago, I was roughed up by an inmate and was scared to tell staff, for in the past, they've always issued me a misconduct along with the perpatrator. I hated "snitching" but I realized that I had to protect myself and others who are weak. From the CO's, Sgt, Lt's, Cpt, and medical were all concerned. The video was viewed and the inmate received a misconduct and R4U time. I still felt nervous with my fellow inmates saying "You're a rat" but that wasn't the case. They patted me on the back and said I did the proper thing. Noone, not even the inmates Muslim brothers had anything negative to say about me. I did make it clear to whomever asked that I don't know what this inmates intentions were. He simply grabbed me and roughed me out. Luckily, I broke free before I discovered his true intentions. He will be returned to population, after his sanction, but I feel safe. I'm more worried about how people will react to him. Everyone will be in my prayers! Blessed Be! Your Sister Jada AKA Piper (PA) Live From The Plantation The point here is that the very mindset that gives police the license to kill gratuitously - ie, even when they are clearly in no danger, this situation also tells prison officials


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I Want To Be There

Thoughts of missing the days of watching you grow Hurt me so much that I think you should know That I want to be there, when you chip your first teeth... And boost you up, to help you climb your first tree

I want to be the one you come to whit your first cut Help you ride your first bike, & watch you fall on your butt I want to be there, when you become a teen And get your first job, makin’ your own green I want to be there, when you go on your first date And be there, the day you marry your soulmate I want to be there for those birthdays; 16...18...& 21 And to have those parently talks 1-on-1 But because of this prison bid I must do I can’t do the things I want to with you But just so you know, that through this poem I send My deepest apologies, through the greatest of women I speak to HIM daily, & in the words of my prayers I seek his help; from the torments...pains...& crosses that I bear And hope that one day you might wish for me That my release will be soon... sooner than you think.

By Queen City Shay (NY)

Black & Pink News

that they are entitled to inflict both physical and psychological torture on the people in their custody. These are patterns apparently well known to head prison officials but ignored because equal and human rights stop masters/the over-seer profits. This is slavery in upgraded form and its backed by the 13th amendment. Slavery is being kept alive through systemic impunity. When you let a certain group know that they are above the law, that they can do as they please to other people and they will be protected, you create sadists. When you promote higher wages and rank for only who show fascist tendencies, you create over-seers. I would like to say there are some good prison staff, proimperialist goons, but there are none. There is no such thing as a good prison staff member because the same ones who kick it with you and won’t be involved personally in you being brutalized by their colleagues and not only don’t try to stop the brutality, but don’t say a word, won’t even report it to the proper authority. Job scared, or in fear of friendly retaliation. We are warehoused, mistreated and this is the place where I’m supposed to be rehabilitated! DOC is afraid of genuinely rehabilitated, selfdetermined, independent thinking, politically conscious men and women. It’s no different from when the slaves learend how to read, they had to be freed. The system, this crooked fascist system is safe as long as the slaves/prisoners remain politically unconscious. Instead of “real” rehabilitation, they try their hardest to prevent the development of any kind of organized political movement or resistance to improve our quality of life. Since I’ve unfolded into a conscious prisoner, my goal to play a role in the

June/July 2018

upliftment of fallen humanity is at an all time high. THere is a systematic problem of cronyism which has created an environment that lacks transparency or accountability. If the common people don’t compare prison to slavery, I don’t know where they been living. I have done my part and will continue to passionately fight for the rights of the human beings who have been thrown away and forgotten about. May Black and Pink live and strive for greatest to free the minds of the people. We focus on things that have no merits while the capitalist class eats and we fight for the scraps. LEt’s build, grow, learn, smile, cry live our freedom. Travis H. (Missouri) “Doing My Prison Stay” A Prisoner in chains but saved by Grace. There is a story, about an inmate came to prison to save another inmate from a life without sentence. It was Feb 7, 2016, and low and behold with the sight that stood before me, my entire life was about to change. In that very second I knew that all my prayers were not only heard but answered. An angel sent from (above) personally picked to free my from being a prisoner in chains. So many nights spent alone just me, Jesus, and my bible. It was only a few weeks earlier that I heard a little voice whisper, sow a seed. A seed? To who and how much? 100 dollars, was all I heard, and that was a bit hefty, being there was no outside help. I listened, but the question still remain, to who? 2.7.16, I just knew when she arrived


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it was sowed on good soil and the harvest had flourished. A polite persian girl who was birthed all the way across the ocean in a whole nother part of the world. Truth be told she wanted to be anywhere but where she was sent (in my room). Then I heard another voice saying “Well aren’t you going to make her comfortable and put her things away?” “Oh my God.” So once again I obliged and comfortable we became. I told her I knew who sent her. Who she asked? Jesus, yes Jesus and I need your help, I need for you to take this case, a murder case. She ask me where’s all my paperwork? I flushed it, I gave it back to Jesus, it’s not mine. Specking on human kindness, persistent was one of my keys, with ask, seek, knock Matthew 7:7 followed by Parable of Persistent Luke 18:1-8. In my asking God must deliver as one of his gifts, it’s a promise from his son. Right before I knew it, I was back in court, she took me from the Supreme Court, back to District court, Matthew 18:18-19 says I tell you the truth whatever you forbid on earth will be forbidden in heaven. If two of you on earth ask (agree) concerning anything you ask, my father in heaven will do for you. 2011, I remember something the Judge said to me, he said it may not look good for you now, but whether by you or through help of an attorney, during Post-conviction things will get better for you. As of today, I’m in court still fighting for my life with Jesus and Yasmin a.k.a. my wife, and I will keep you updated on all of us. Amen. Lashana H. (NV)

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Born to Be Me

Well all my life, I’ve been criticized Wal in the room, size me up with eyes Like they don’t understand that I have my own life That they live theirs’ their way, get the hell out of mine

Chorus Why’s there so much hate in the world these days It shouldn’t matter God don’t make us all the same We’re all his children, all cleansed in the name Love your better half, with all you have One of these days they will understand Doesn’t matter if your LGBT With Jesus, God set us all free Stand tall, love your neighbor as thee Go ahead, believe and scream...I was...Born to be free.... I was....Born to be me Born to be me Don’t let the harassment bring you down Instead, be strong together, keep the family around Community has a way of

over comin’ the doubts Come out, love your spouse, these are our rights now Chorus

Ya know Macklemore, man he said it right It’s the same thing as fightin’ for Black and White Comments on a keyboard can cause suicide Can’t we all get along and learn to love life Chorus So I let the comments roll of my back They don’t phase me cause of the love I have Shouldn’t have to be behind a closed door to love my man Love was meant to share with your better half, remember that Chorus x2 By Matthew “Kowboy” (Oregon)


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My dear family, Peace and Blessed New Year to you all. Your brother, Omar T. (Omarvelous); your distant Sunshine seeking to warm you up close with rays upon rays of Peace, Love, Unity, and a proper dash of Swagg. It has been a while since I last wrote, and I apologize for the momentary pause; the famine is my fault and I humbly ask for your forgiveness. Before I submerge into the depths of my expressions, please allow me a moment to extend my shout outs. Big Ups to the warriors at Black and Pink for your unwavering persistence, the love and care you all pour into what you do. On behalf of myself and all of the family serving time, Thank You so much. Yall Rock, and the works yall are doing are truly the works of Angels. You are appreciated! I am serving time in Arizona State, and, as of late several people have asked me if I am Gay. They see my array of Black and Pink zines decoratively displayed... they witness me stand up and advocate for the LGBTQ community... they spectate at the solidarity, congregation, and open support we bask in regularly. I would like to address this question in an open format so as to remove any and all voids of clarity. First and foremost, I’m not one who subscribe to labels: when you label someone you often time run the risk of erroneously limiting that someone to the confines of the definition of that label. This is unfortunate, because, as an advocate for the abolition of Prisons everywhere I must first liberate my

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own self and stop restricting myself to classifications and other forms of separate-ideology doctrines. Secondly, I am a Spiritual being, a child of God created in that image and likeness. All of my family are children of the Most High as well, and, when I see them that is what I see; spiritual beings just like Me. Somehow, somewhere along the way, we seem to have forgotten this simple but sincere Truth. Furthermore, what one does and with whom does not define who one is. That’s backwards; who one is is what define what one does. Example, if I break into your house one could assume me a burglar. If a police break into your house most would assume him as on the job... Doing his duty... Must be protecting or serving someone in need. Finally, I am not a Gay man, I’m quite heterosexual. But, for all of my life I have been the epitome of Queer, and so I proudly embrace that descriptive “Q” in LGBTQ. As an African American man I know what it feels like to be discriminated against, for no other reason except the color of my chocolate-ass epidermis. Being born and raised in Compton California, freshdipped in street wisdom, body fully tattooed, and a Swaggalicious mastery of linguistics, my hood-peers backed away from my because my Academic feats didn’t compare to what was familiar to them, and yet, my class-mates at my Alma mater had preconceived notions about what to expect from “my kind” so when I breezed through advanced curriculums that they found to be a chore... when I articulated my ideas and effectively challenged the completion of what they thought they know... blasting their stereo-typical assessments to smithereens, I was cast aside as an

June/July 2018

“oddity,” although my professors exclaimed me as the “unexplained.” Yes, I am Queer. I’ve been in prison for 29 years. I arrived in 1989 for Aggravated Assault, although I touched nor injured no one in my case. I was sentenced to Life, not eligible for parole until 25 years are served. I completed that in 2014 yet here I still remain. I’ve watched murderers come and go. I’ve watched people get out and return, and yet I touched nor harmed absolutely no one. Feel free to see for yourself (Case # CR1989-09859 State of Arizona Vs. Thomas). Despite it all, I smile. My mind has remained opened even when they close the doors. I’ve educated myself beyond phenomenon, was placed in Solitary where by I discovered I’m NEVER by myself, because I’m always with myself. So, their failed endeavor to punish me morphed into a wonderful surprise. I have walked amongst killers yet I am unscathed. I am blessed to have a double-life, and, the powers that be only see me as a lucky lie who have lasted. Fact is, I’m a man with two Truths who continues to Triumph. I know intimately why the cagedbird sings. And so, to my kindred spirits...to my family... to my fellow LGBTQ siblings... I feel you, I know you, I love you, I AM you. Continue to be exactly who you are. Your uniqueness is your wings to fly. Our solidarity provides us with a Sky. Okay, in conclusion, listen family: I really crave a penpal to to share thoughts, feelings, and perspectives with. I’m quite opinionated but I’m a thinker so you can believe the dialogue will remain up to par. I want to develop some true friendships. Plus... (wait for it)... I am set to go to the parole board in 2019. My


Volume 9, Issue 4

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More Words from Black & Pink Family chances are pretty damn good that I will be emancipated, and it would be so nice to have friends out there to applaud my arrival. After being in this modern-day dungeon for close to three decades, I know I will need a guide. My only plan so far is to visit Masjid al-Rabia in Chicago; gotta offer up my servitude because I believe in what they are doing and I want to be part of it. Maybe we should establish a chapter of Black and Pink in Arizona. (???) Peace and love, Omar (Omarvelous) T. (Arizona) The empathetic child. It is said, “Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes.” (American Proverb) To have empathy is to be capable of understanding and identifying with another person such as a son or daughter. Feelings without having those experiences personally. Stop and think for a minute. How many times, just today, have you insulted someone, made assumptions about a tranny, peer, or a member of your staff, or felt as if you are better than them because of A, B, C? Then, answer to yourself; is it fair to think these things? Well I was that child, but time an experience has taught me well. My lifestyle is the best weapon for these haters holding one’s head high. And maintaining a good posture, your outlook on life will be so stress free because when you are in a circle its a place a square can’t fit. Dig that. You keep your circle small

and security tight. Enjoy my family we must teach our next generation. The evil we faced in the past can arise again in the future, let’s give the guidance to learn from the error of their ways. You know how rough it was for us, a little easier for them because of those footsteps before us, by us, for them. Keep yourself worth priceless, Mercedes (CA) Greetings Dream Weavers. I am Alan, residing in Cal. I am vexed by not knowing where I might find a place in the LGBTQ family. I, as I am, embrace all lifestyles, for you see, I am a mature voluptuary of decades. In my pursuit of sensual pleasures without limitations or restrictions I’ve roamed across fourteen countries on four countries and through three marriages with my pants around my ankles. In my time within the system I have endured a starvational diet sans any sensual pleasures to sate my cravings. The few attempts I have made were sorely lacking due to the lack of experience of my partner. Adequate in nut perhaps but still a mesphyte in pleasuring. I am unknowing how best to present myself to this microcosm. Should I be gay, a bisexual, histitutionally bi, or straight but in the down low. I enjoy sex, I pursue pleasure for pleasure’s sake. I relish it, hunger for it. Why is it so difficult to find such within these walls. Are there others of you in Black and

Going Home

I’m drifting back in my mind to the things I left behind. Remembering hot summer days The games we used to play Days of laughter and swings. There were bumps, scrapes, and bee stings Running so fast you thought you could fly There wasn’t anything you wouldn’t try The world was yours to explore those days are gone forever more. I’m all grown and old Maybe there’s one more adventure to be told One more horizon to head for to be free once more When it’s all been done as the last dance ends and the last song is sung I will be going home to God in Heaven with the new body I’ll be given There’ll be running, singing, and laughter This will begin my greatest adventure

By Jose Carlos H. (CO)


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Pink’s family with sage ensue for me. If so I’d love to hear from you so as to take advantage from your experiences and learned wisdom. I am not looking for relationships, yet if one presented itself capable of fulfilling my desires it would truly be welcomed and cherished. Alan (CA) Black and Pink.. I will join your fight... Let’s not give up... I would also like to join Black and Pink and share this letter I would like support from my new Black and Pink Family. Trans lives matter. LGBTQIA ours lives matters. Right to get feminine products. We fighting for our rights and respect as transgenders, our rights to be us. Hello, my name is Terry T. and I am a Transgender who goes by and preferred to be announce and write by the name of Ms. April Tamela Cassidine. as my former stage named. I’m here all alone in this prison in the need of a special friend; advice, help and support for me as a transgender. 1 incident cause me 25 years of my life and freedom. Sad but true my accidental crime change my life like a blink of an eye. I wish I could turn back the hands of time. I am tired of being pushed around by staffs verbal harassment, discrimination, emotional abuse. Every time I files incidents reports or write a grievances it always be swept under the rug like at times I just wanna give up I also pray at times too about my mistreatments and neglected verbal harassment and also my discriminations acts against the staffs here by most of all

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I know my God will answer me one day I even begged them with tears to leave me alone. But it’s like a child yelling for Help and nobody is there to save him I wanna file a suit but would it help. I even gets to the point where I would rather commit suicide by taking my own life but is it worth it. I just wanna be at peace. The wardens here don’t let me and others transgenders womens here get to treat ours hair nor buy feminine products off commissary they force us to live like other men please help us. However my new pink-black Family your support for this matter and concerns would make a big difference to a transgender like me. I have suffered a lot and damages hair because of failure of treatments due to our warden Aw. Pittman over treatments and operations and transgender inmates failure to take ours concerns and criticized us to force to live and act like guys. I mean why I can’t be me but we all know thats torture and discrimination why can’t we be happy and explore our sexuality. Everytime I ask her about our needs she always say mean and rude things and threatening me and other transgenders with segregations. We don;t have any access to anything to do with womens items like hair products gel, perm, relaxers, no womens body wash no salon for us. But the guys here got their own barbershop. Only thing we got thats feminine is bras/panties and the state had to get that for us. I am just writing the truth and my words. Please share this story any support or advice is great. Thanks. Homophobics are not welcome on, or in ours breakthrough. LGBTQIA lives. Respect etc do matters. Ms. April Cassidine (TN)

June/July 2018

Hi, my name is Haylee Tee Tee. wI’m 35 years old. I’ve known I’ve been a female since I was age 10 years old. I’m writing to my fam because there is a lot going on with me. I’ve been with the same husband Kyle Davis aka Blayz for 2 years now. Lately I’ve been really really depressed. I’m on J Block which is a lot like a jungle. They hate the LGBTQ community on this block. When I go out and sit at a table someone comes over and chases me away from the table telling me, “Man you’re sitting at the wrong table!” I’ve asked my unit manager, unit psychologist, unit counselor and the prison prison/ superintendent assistant and security Lt to please move me to the north side where I have people to talk to and socialize of my own lifestyle. ho tolerate and don’t mess with the LGBTQ community to much. All I want is to do my time in peace enjoy my time being the woman I am in peace with friends that I can talk to and and who understand what I am going through while waiting for my bed date, also my spouse but administration don’t seem to care. Every day and night my depression gets worse by the minute because I don’t have anyone to talk to. I pray night and day to God to take away the pain and hurt I go through every day because people can’t and won’t let me be who I feel I am and because I feel I am and because I feel so damn alone with my struggle of what I am going through at time I just wish to be with God and to have that one promise where there is no more pain or sorrow and every tear will be washed away because that’s all my life’s been these last 3 months is pain and sorrow and shedding of tears. I’ve done try to take the pain away my whole life by hurting myself I don’t want to


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continue down that road but it seems that’s the only way to erase the pain of being misunderstood because it seems the administration don’t care if I have peers who understand me and can help me through the pain and sorrow because I’ve written so many requests and all I got was “we will put you in AC/RC which is self lock up if nothing at all any input from my black and pink would be good I’m lost in a deep cycle of depression with no peers to understand where I’m coming from to help because they don’t live our life. Thanks for listening and hope to hear from you all some feedback. Love you all Black and Pink fam! Your Sister, Haylee Tee Tee Davis PA Houtzdale. PS. what is AC/ RC going to do for someone who is depressed but make them more depressed. just shows how much the administration cares for the mental health of their inmate. Please advocate and have our voices heard please.

To my Pride Nation & Black and Pink Heros, This is my first time writing a note to Black & Pink newsletter, so here goes nothing or in this case here goes everything. Hey LGBT Heros, my name is “Dell” from Pennsylvania. I’m currently incarcerated at Sci-Dallas prison AKA the “Pink Palace”…It’s called Pink Palace because they say this is the capital of LGBTQ for the prisons in PA. Don’t quote me on that. But it sounds cool, lol! Before I got into my character, let me say that every hero that had a part in the Black & Pink newsletter, thank you for your Art & poems,

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letters and everything else… Now back to the biz…I’m Puerto Rican, and I’m so hurt on what happened in Orlando, FL and the Pulse night club. RIP to my fall LGBT Pride Nation, and my heart goes out to the families that lost a: brother, sister, cousin, uncle, aunt, nephew, niece, father, mother son, daughter, husband and/or wife and friends…I’m so sick and tired of hate crimes. for me, it was two birds with one stone, Hispanics and LGBTQ’s going down…not freaking cool at all. My brain just aches thinking about it. Off subject…I’ve been dealing with an issue for quite some time now. I’ve been with may females in my lifetime and I love females but I’m so attracted to transgenders and males (but the males has to be pretty) does that make me bisexual!? I had sexual intercourse with a transgender one time, and sexual contact with 3 males at different times…Ever since the encounters, I’ve bee so hot for trans and pretty males… Here at Sci-Dallas prison, there is an inmate that is so sexy hot, but I don’t go the heart to say something because of a few reasons: No one here at the prison knows about my secrete, and if they did I would be shunned. They would hate me. I’m going home in about 9 months and Katana has life without parole. If I have a few more moths to know one another. i don’t want to hurt her. Anyways, I guess I answered my question. I’m bi-sexual… So I guess I should say, “Hey my pride nation,” my new extended

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family for life…I’m here and here to stay, for life..my hero are you guys, the LGBTQ world. May we continue to amaze and surprise the world with our many talents and gifts…I think I will get a tattoo of a tiger (Bengal) with its stripes the color of the rainbow. It represents power, pride and heart. I don’t know who’s behind the Black & Pink but I will be a part of it in and our of prison. So maybe the next time I write, I would have made that move to let Katana know that I’m feeling her. Wish me good luck B&P! Fermin F. (PA) This is William I would like to say this longest ride in my life I been gone 18 years 8 months in this concrete jungle. The world is going backwards like 60s and 70s instead 2017 my mind I see chaos because Donald Trump in office but we go have money to play with now we his investments go to see what this go turn out for us thats lock up like me I been lock up since I was seventeen I’m thirty-six now I see life in different perspective I keep my game face on because life is like card game life can change deal of the shuffle so you got deal with hand v. been dealt with so in my life I see ways to get paid the dumb mentality is really dead now you ain’t about getting cashing in on your investments live with what you invest in thats what life go give you what you invested in... So if you investor you like to invest is something productive you got to invest in something safe keep your product protected that


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what your life is to government is a investment you get in debt you lifetime investment just like prison we is state investments until we free you get lock up again than you they cattle for they plantation for life. William C. (TX) Well Oct 22, 2017 I turned 34 years old. Feeling it! =) I am still waiting on my att. to contact me about my court issue and deny this “modification of sentence” charge modifier... =( He was appointed to me on 7/25/17 so yea 3+ months :( In one of the black and pink newspaper I seen and wrote down the following information “Doe Vs Snyder” about risk factor! I’m hoping this case will help me get a lesser time put on me. I have nine years left and could just get six yrs added if not hope for the lesser time! My step uncle has now been writing me which he’s been dealing with a lot. Also my family, mom has been doing a lot of tests due to her system saying she’s about to have a stroke or heart attack...This I fear due to her brothers and sisters also have had strokes and heart attacks. I hope to God it won’t happen to my mother. Thanks to Molly Costello who found me on your page. She’s asked and used some art work from me and another inmate on my unit for our LGBT peoples! Chris M. (WI) Dear Black and Pink Family, I’ve only been receiving Black and Pink for a few months now, but I already look forward to hearing from my family each month. I

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recently got the October/November issue, and I had to share my story. My name is Phillip, I’m a 36 year old white Bi man that has been in a lot of bad situations in my life. Truth is, I’ve put my-self in most of them. I first started messing around with boys when I was just 5 years old. My family firmly believes that I was molested before that, and looking back, I probably was. But I don’t remember if it did happen. But I do know that from 5 on I was messing around with whatever boy would let me, however I could. I did mess around with a few girls along the way, including the one I went to T.Y.C. for molesting with I was 14. I was raised in a very strict, Bible based family, and they don’t accept homosexuality at all. So all of my life I’ve been the Black Sheep of the family. But they’ve more or less known that I’d been having sex with guys all along. They just didn’t approve and wanted me to “change my ways” to be more acceptable to God. Of course, coming to prison created two new problems. One was, yes, I could have sex with guys all I wanted to for the most part. The other problem was, alot of guys saw this pretty, young, white boy with a pretty, tight butt, and they all wanted to stick their cocks in it. So unless I wanted to be the new whore in town, and used like old toilet paper, I had to keep that part of me hidden. Now I’m on my third time down, and I’m all the way out. Why? Well, 5 years ago, this guy, who isn’t gay or bi, kept wanting to play gay games with me. Come on, you all know that I’m talking about.

June/July 2018

Well, one day, I finally got fed up with it and told him, “fine, yes, I’m gay , now shut up.” Well, it took a while, years in fact, but I finally got just about everyone that knows me trained. Don’t Play Gay Games With Me! You see, having been in T.D.L.J. since I was 18, going in and out that is, I have lost all of my inhabitions. I can quite literally walk down the hall naked and it won’t bother me. So I used that in playing the game. I was, and still am, willing to go to extremes. And most non-gay men just can’t deal with that, so they quite, and most never try to play with me ever again. Others set limits. Some are willing to play, and might even be gay, but just won’t come out. I did have two guys come out to me. But they both chose to stay in the closet. And I respect that. I had sex with one, and the other has wanted to be my girl, but we just can’t hook up. I support all who are struggling, out, in the closet, whatever. I’d like to say a few other things as well. Cassie in TX., if you were on Wynne, I’d like to say hi, and take care. Eric “Angel”, you and screw just need to get out of West Texas. Where I’m at, if you worth together, get on the wig together, you can get together, know what I mean? At the least, you can go to church, rec, and other stuff together. And then you can keep the the laws out of your business and hang out and show each other some love. You just got to find a way off of ya’ll’s unit’s to some place better. To Ti’anna, girl, you dream big, but it does sound good. If you can pull together 5 to 10 million, you should be able to get started at least. I wish you the


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Volume 9, Issue 4

best. To every-body else, this ole country boy wishes you the best, fight on, stay strong, stay beautiful, wonderful, and you/

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letter published and maybe get some feedback.

Emalyn, thanks for the card, George is Dashing, and so are we all. Much Love to all.

Just a quick sidenote. I didn’t get issues 6 or 7, not sure why. Anyway, thanks again for everything you do. Love to all my Black and Pink family.

Your Brother, Phillip (TX)

Luke E. (Maine)

Dear Black and Pink Family,

Hola Black & Pink,

First and foremost I want to say thank you for all the hard work you do and support you give. Everytime I receive one of your newsletters, it helps me to feel like someone is thinking of me. As I write this I have just gotten volume 8, issue 8 of Black and Pink. My condolences to the San Quentin News crew. Arnulfo sounds like I guy I wish I could have known. Secondly to Michalle Wright, I am proud of you for fighting for what’s right. Way to go. I am on my second prison sentence. My first was 4 years. This time I am doing 2 years. I had someone who called me family that I was in county with all of a sudden stop answering me calls and stopped writing to me. How is that supportive? I wish I was as strong as Ms. Wright.

Que paso? I thanks you for the special post card, and the magazine. Let’s get right to it. The 49 people slaughtered in orlando is reflective of the egregious error in human, psychological DNA. If you look at what it says in the Bible, in Genesis 1:26, “Let us make man (species) in our image,, after our likeness.” The you go all the way to John 4:8, “God is Love!” This what we have forgotten and as long as we run away from our true selves, then we can never be healed. I am 62 years of age now. I am a person of three different races: black, white and Native American. I am heterosexual, a liberal Christian. I am a student of metaphysics. I’ve studied most religions, philosophies, ideologies, sciences, political fields etc. I am an artist, and I write short stories, mostly fantasy, science fiction, and erotic adventures I’ve seen in prison on this term of life without, for 27 years I was found to be a habitual criminal on property crimes and given life without parole on each count. I was given your address by a fellow inmate who is now out on parole after serving 23 years. I hope to be pardoned in a couple of years as all of my criminal history is onviolent.

I am a 28 year old bisexual man and I’m afraid to tell people because of the judgement. I struggle with low self-esteem because I am a bit overweight and have always been picked on for it. So how do I handle being overweight and add to that being bisexual, and to other people it’s ammo for insults. I am a person who loves people. So I don’t understand how one can humiliate someone because of their orientation. I would love to get this

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element, violence, that reactionary extreme to usually heated emotions. The fuel is ignorance for when zealots of whatever persuasion start a campaign to purge a society of all of its sins, the it is going to turn ugly. Sadly, I as a Christian, must admit this, that Christianity is probably the most to blame in that Western interpretation of Jesus’ teachings coupled with racial superiority has spawned a form of religion that subtly engulfs that unaware the tentacles are the branches that have bred some extreme cults. The diversion is to blame radical Islam extremists. Certainly, it is evident that the prophet Muhammed’s visions. Hi message is laced more directly with seeming aggression? Yet, if you look at the Bible, the history is clearly that of a hellish retribution for evil nations. Look at the book of Joshua. The danger that Jesus’ followers often miss, is the leaders who push the congregation into the old political arena. Ah! The strangest of bedfellows and as the proverbial serpent are most wise in metaphysics it shows that the origin of all things is of the mind no matter what it is. The mind is the author if we look to physical DNA to override the mind’s power, then we will predispose ourselves even to unbreakable demons. This is what it means by putting life (God) into inanimate objects. As in anthropomorphisms, we do absentmindedly yell at things, that are simple instruments, designed first by us, then when they fail we cuss at them as if they have a mind. I close with this thought, no one person, group, nation, religion, whatever is to blame even if homosexuality is sin, even if it


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is unnatural? It is not my place to judge a guy person or anyone: Luke 6:37, for no one is effete, and we all are ignorant to one degree or another. When you deal away a of the aspects of us, that we form in our minds, when we finally grasp what love really is, what spirit (God) really is, then shall we begin to heal Deep down, we are all human beings, Christian, Jew, Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu, Atheist, Satanist, Black, White, Straight, Gay, Rich, poor; these are all titles of our own design, our creator gave us one common thread (human) and that should be good enough for now. The future is uncertain and we can not evolve in mind if we feat diverse aspects of the life we know, for who is to say what heaven of hell really is? Peace! James C. (NV) Hello to my Black and Pink family, My name is Ehtan.there are a few things I’d like to discuss but first I’d like to give you all my background with hopes of my story being an encouragement to those with a similar story. i will be 25 years old in February of 2017. I’ve been incarcerated since I was 15 years old. thanks to the “great” state of Texas who feels like they can charge a juvenile as an adult for any little thing, in my case burglary. My story is like so many others. My life of crime started as a result of a very broken home, no demolished home! when I was a baby, my mother was diagnosed with cancer. my stepdad tried but he was Hispanic with no education, so we were very poor. I learned how to cook ad take care of my baby sisters so my stepdad could work.

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At the age of 10 and half, my mother passed away and I took it very hard. I was forced to live with my aunt and her husband. Her husband was an abusive alcoholic, drug addict who would beat me, burn me and cut me on a regular basis. When I was about 13 years old, I wanted to hang out with my girlfriend for the day so we did and when it was time to take her home, my aunt’s husband offered a ride, I went along for the ride. On the way to her house, my aunt’s husband decided he wanted to stop at a ‘drug buddy’ of his’ house. What happened next is something that scarred my heart for life. He and his friend gang banged my 13 year old girlfriend and to this day I blame myself. In the months following this event, I ran away from home because I was scared to be at home. It was long before i was caught ad sent to live with my grandfather. For 2 months, he tried his hardest to show me love but my heart was too broken. I was an emotional mess. I ran away from his house, but this time I was on the run for a while. I slept outside. I broke into houses for food and money. A lot of bad things happened to me on the street including me getting raped in a drainage pipe. When I finally got caught, I was sent to juvenile on a nine month sentence. Once I successfully completed the program, my family would not take me back so the juvenile tried to keep me, I ran. 28 days later I woke up in an adult country jail being charged as an adult for a burglary. I blame a lot of my actions on myself but I release that it was a result of a broken home, broken heart and a very emotional personality. Today I am a man who is completely selfrehabilitated. Today, I make good decisions and today I know exactly what I want in life. I want a wife

June/July 2018

and eventually children. I want a family and a good home. I want to take pride in everything I do and be a role model father. There’s only one thing…I’m gay. 100% GAY. Something about a transwoman that is so much more beautiful to e than any born woman! I discharge my prison sentence in 2 1/2 year and I have no clue what to expect from my fellow LGBTQ people in the free world. I’ve been gay my whole life, but all I’ve been around is…I hate this term but “penitentiary gays” my whole life. One thing I hate most is the labels that the world has put on LGBTQ people as perverted, weak, confused, dirty and whatever else. i have values about myself. I’m a stiff ass white boy that fights hard for what i believe and I will ride until the end behind anyone who is LGBTQ. Like for real! But all I’ve ever seen is this cut throat penitentiary drama shit that I’m not down with. I love my LGBTQ people, but I have a question of my people locked up and in the free. Is it like this in the free world or is there LGBTQ people out there who have the same values as I do? I want a transwoman with good values who I can trust to be faithful and loyal. I want to know for a fact that she can be every bit of a wife and mom as a “real” woman. I want friends with good values who I can adopt as my family. Most of all I want this for all LGBTQ people. I want the world to see that we are strong, that we are not just a bunch of horny perverts. I want the world to see that we can blend in with society, raise families and do everything just as good as they can. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying


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don’t get freaky or express yourself sexually, because I will be the first to say, “I love to get down and dirty.” Real talk! But I feel like we should be respectful so that the world will se us as something they can embrace. Now please tell me I’m not the only one who feels this way? what are some things I can expect once I’m out? going to the free world as a grow man is new to me much less as an open gay man, so please give advice? If you wish to holler at me, you can find me on the Black and Pink pen pal site and if you incarcerated well…you must write through someone. I love you all, for real!!! Ya boy, Ethan Marshall S. (TX) I once read somewhere that our biggest fear is not that we are inadequate, but that we are powerful beyond measure. My greatest fear is abandonment, of love and loyalty lost. The thought of this society of ours continuing to act like gazelles in the presence of hyenas terrifies me deeply. We are lions, and we can’t ever forget the resilience and the unity of the lion pride, that’s where our core strength lies. We survive off that strength, the strength to keep going even when the task at hand seems to be too great. If we give this up, how do we eat? How do we protect our young? How do we conquer this jungle of life? We strive off the success we accomplish together and we try to build off our failures with the hope that we never make the same mistakes twice. Together we continue to walk the shadow of the valley of death with solid-vision / ambition because we are all soldiers

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of the struggle. In a pride of lions we make it out business to protect one another from the depths of our enemies because no one knows what we stand for but us. And though sometimes tactics are bent on destruction we must over-stand that we must first destroy the old to build the new. In us we find the courage to keep on fighting even though we’re outnumbered, the strength to move on even when they say we can’t. And in us we find the heart to make a historical mark on the land we walk. So profound and pronounced that our names will be mentioned in the mouths of our enemies for years and years to come. Being a true lion: We stand for something bigger than life itself. Our unity gives us strength because without it we would surely fail. “Perfection” can only be obtained through “precision,” precision can only be gained through “practic,” meaning that we cannot master our goals without studying our movements, strengthening our weaknesses, and working to maintain the balance. Our loyalty is the vision / understanding that we must have mixed without our soul, but first we must be a thousand with ourselves in order to know the meaning of 00% loyalty. If we don’t know ourselves we are our own worst enemy. We will fail in all that we do in life. We as a people control our own do’s and don’ts. So we can only be held back by the decisions we choose to make. As a wise mind once said, we are the masters of thought and even in our most weakened and abandoned state we remain the lords of our own thoughts. But in a

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state of weakness and degradation we become foolish masters and misgovern the household. When we begin to reflect upon our mistakes and start to search diligently (within ourselves) for the law upon which our being is established we then will become wise masters. Directing our energies will intelligence and fashion our thoughts to fruitful issues… Ponder this… only through searching and mining are gold and diamonds attained. We can find every truth connected with our being

Bear With Me God I’m yours My name is Sinn I was born in a split up home Bear with me I am a sinner born of flesh Nobody is perfect and could never compare to the one and truthfully you. God Bear with me I am gay, you told me to confess that it will bring happiness to my soul God Bear with me I am a prisoner who Motivation to steal, rob, and commit murder its trigger is lust i come to you in hope that you will never forsake me as i as grab your hand and walk God please “Bear with me”

By Sinn (SC)


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only if we dig deep into the mines of our selves and then we will see that we are the makers of our own character and the builders of our own destiny. But sometimes in order for us to realize this we must first go through the struggle of confinement. Good things come to those who are real, better things come to those who are patient, and the best things come to those who don’t give up or give in. Some people enter our lives as blessings. Some come into our lives as lessons, don’t waste your words on people who don’t deserve them. Sometimes it takes hurt to properly grow, sometimes it takes failure in order to conquer, most of all sometimes it takes disloyalty to know the true essence of a person.

A Sudden Death To know the Darkness is to love the Light to welcome dawn and fear the Night A gasp of Breath A Sudden Death A tale begun in this pain, I realize that behind these eyes I’ll be chastized that even my laughter shall be sin, because this skin I live within, All my life I have lived in fear, till my heart begins to sheer, find a friend true of Heart to make my fear fall-apart. By Jacob “Wolf” (TX)

June/July 2018

Black & Pink News

In the biological family that’s no longer here with us. Forget about them. And the masses that continuously berate, antagonize, and hate on us, don’t waste any time worrying about them. It’s not really us they hate. They hate themselves because we’re a reflection of what they wish to be. My familia, we all we got and all we need. It’s time that we recognize that and stop trying to fit in with the masses. Before we even entered this plane of existence we were who we are. Embrace it. Fall in love with it. I know you don’t know me but I urge each and every one of you to let your loyalty and devotion taste like fresh water to this family. Let this new year be the year we pay homage, pay tribute to those in this pride that we’ve lost. Remember this love is love, but loyalty is unconditional. I love you all, mi amor sun abridge. In solidarity, Mecca (OH) Dear Black & Pink family, I’m writing in response to Rob from Detroit, Michigan, that was printed in the Feb/March 2018 Black & Pink magazine. Rob, everything you wrote I agree. I been fighting my thoughts my whole life, when I knew I was attracted to certain type of guys. I’m from the Eastside, Wade, and Dickerson, near Chandler Park in teh Harper and Conners area. The Eastside is tough so I always held a facade. My first prison experience was at Carson City Correctional facility back in 2002. I was put in a cell with a queen from Detroit that used to prostitute down

Woodward Ave. I stayed in the cell for about three days enjoying myself, but felt embarassed of my behavior and moved out the cell. I stayed creeping like a 007 mission from facility to facility. At St. Louis facility, one of my Westside Dexter homeboys almost caught me up with a queen. I lied, told him I was getting this lawyer info from the queen. I always was attracted to the money shots in adult film, and was extremely turned on by seeing other male’s organs. Plus I like women so I was attracted to their beauty. And how they carried themselves. With my curiousity killing me, I eventually came out the closet to friends and all. Now doing everything a woman does with a man, and as I meet different guys, I fulfill their fantasies. I still like women, but this is something I’m going to have to live with, no matter who likes it. I’m in a federal prison right now in Arkansas. My release date is on May 1, 2018. I will be at the halfway house on Monica, on the Westside for about three months. Once I get out I will do more of reaching out to the gay community in Detroit, and to the many other cities in Michigan. Starting with Flint, Lansing, Grand Rapids, Saginaw, and Muskegon. So to all of my LGBTQ family in Michigan, y’all will see more of me soon. To meet up with me, just look for me in the gay clubs in Detroit. I’m definantly proud of you too, Rob, and I want to thank your lover Jae, for encouraging you, and helping you understand who you really are! Peace! True (Arkansas)


Volume 9, Issue 4

Dear Black + Pink family, Hi my name is Anthony. I’m a gay American CDCR prisoner. I came out of the closet in May 1996 and I’m writing to you and all because the issues of the new federal law say that they are going to distribute condoms to the prisoners but the situation is to have sex in prison is illegal. The situation is [conflicting] and you see I had sex in the jail and I was convicted of sex acts and ny law that if they allow same sex then I believe that I should be released back to society. Yes I admit that I’m gay and just because I am gay that the facts that doesn’t mean I’m a offender back in 1996 I was found guilty of sex acts. Not because of the sex acts. But me riley because I’m gay. Their was no justice for me. I’ve been wrongfully convicted due to the quite that even though I’m gay I feel as American Gay Man, I do have rights and I was found guilty of these acts the man that lied on me he got away with sex playin mean he and I never knew each other. And you see I was focused on due to e being gay and I have been down 20 years of my life because I let a desperate man have his way sexually. He got what he wanted sexually of me then when he was caught, he then told the cops I did him. He lied to the cops to the courts and I’ve been in the system for 20 years of my life and even thought I have been denied, deprived the right privileged to be gay and I’m on a PC yard basically a yard were this is to be true that the percentage of the yard is gay and transgender you see I when I came out of the closet, I had made a choice to stay out of the closet and due to coming out I had all bad happened. I lost

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everything and now I have passed a heavy debt to society and I love all gays and transgenders they are all my family. And I love to tell you that the law now has to be aware that they made a mistake by putting me away for 25 to life because of a sexual acts that was misunderstood and I have been even into sex acts in prison. And even though sex was great, my prison lover and I were together but now due to the facts he wanted to have sex with multiple partners, he used me. I was deeply in love with in my heart for this man and he touched me like no man has ever literally touched e he broke my heart. and yes i’m single and i have been hurt and this is about learning about the live same sex relationships and all my life I’ve been gay. Respectfully, Anthony Scott B. (CA) Peace Be upon you and yours, I’m another brother caught up in the drag-net of California Penology System Without Knowledge of Self, and my true - History and Culture. I’m a first termer in the penalsystem and as a 24 year old Black American my education in school as to history - consisted solely of Indians and Pilgrims. Up until last week I though the Alex Haylee’s, Roots picture was something that occurred in Africa, and not in the United States. I’m a blank canvas whose only picture - painting thereon, was the Christian faith because it was the religion taught in my house hold by beloved one’s grandparents, mother, etc. were miseducated, and on their way to Hell. Being frankly honest

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A Lily Among the Thorns A lily among thorns in the early morning dew, How could I have been granted this precious view? Visions of you, as I try to create that perfect phrase, promises of tomorrow, searching for better days. As I watch seasons pass, where memories grow Autumns of tomorrow, I long to know. Winters are fading; the rains will soon be gone. Flowers will then appear Our tomorrow will then be known. The wind will lose its fridgeting bite, The eagles will mate at t he highest of heights, The sea turtles will swim to shore to lay, And the flowers will have something colorful to say. Pleasant moments of love will again fill the air, Flowers will dance again, cooing doves in pairs. The meadows will blossom, feeding the spawning fawns. Then, and only then, will you see “A Lily Among Thorns.”

By Katness W. (TX)


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with myself kept me from learning what was the true religion of my ancestors… Teach me! One love. To love one’s at Black and Pink, I will like to take the time to say “thank you,” to the love one’s at Black and Pink for all the love and support you show to LGBTQ people inside and outside or prison. We as LGBTQ people need all the love, support, and positivity we can get in the struggle for survival and freedom. Thank you Black and Pink much love. Deonta (CA) Hello family! I am a 30 year old black male from (cali) everybody call me Bam. Here in California its different than other states. We can have transgenders or same sex partner in the cell with us without getting separated from each other. Everybody knows your business and don’t care at all. See if you do decide to start a relationship with somebody just keep everything to yourself so you or your partner won’t get separated. I have 30 yrs to do so this is gonna by my life for a while an I been in two relationships with transgender an haven’t been in trouble yet and will not get in trouble for it period. Don’t get me wrong you have guards that will clown with each other about consensual partner and etc. You will love California Department of Corrections if you was here real talk. I just wanted to fill you in on how things work out here in California and send my love to all the family here. (WE ARE EVERLASTING FAMILY.) Bam.(CA)

June/July 2018

Black & Pink News

Dear Black & Pink, First I just want to say thank you for supporting the LGBT community. And I also want to thank you for taking the time out to read this letter. My name is Robert, but my friends call me Redd. I’m a 20 y/o bi-sexual maile. I’m currently committed at southeast Missouri Mental Health Center in Farmington, MO. I did 7 years in the Missouri prison system for crimes I committed in 2008. April 1st will be my 10th year of being locked up. I recieved a 7 year prison sentence in 2008. I know everybody is saying, “why 10 years after serving a seven year sentence in prison?” Well, I was labeled as a sexually violent predator by Missouri’s Attorney general back in 2008. So now, I’m doing sex offender treatment to change my “risk rate”. I’m not here for something I did. I’m here for something the state thinks I might do. To Jack Patterson at Lovelock Correctional Center: I know what you’re going through. I served an entire 7 years in MODOC for crimes I committed back in 2008. At the end of my sentence, I saw a doctor for an evaluation. She used her position to give me (and many others) a high-risk assessment. And she used the same form, “Static 99”. I get judged by many people here because of who I am. I get judged by staff and other residents. I get called names such as: Fag, Homo, queer, and many more. I deal with homophobic people every day. Most act like they are homophobic, but engage in homosexual sex behind closed doors. And I get judged.

All I say Jack is keep your head up and your eyes open. Don’t let this shit get you down by no means. Put your faith in God and he will see you through your struggles. And to you, Ms. Jessica Hicklin. I congratulate you on your win against the Missouri prison system. You go girl! One of the guys here read your story. He said it was unconstitutional to give a teenager life without parole. You might want to check into that. I wrote you a letter too. I hope to hear from you. I know as we walk on this unpredictable and sometimes difficult road, others may turn their backs on us. But one thing I know for sure is that Black & Pink will always support the LGBT community. Thank you for your time. God bless each and everyone. Keep your heads up and your eyes open. THere is always something waiting for us on the other side. Love, Redd (MO) Dear Black and Pink, My name is Breanna H. and I am a member of your newsletter. I wanted you to know as well as other that as of February 14th, Valentines Day I took my 1st hormone treatment after a long battle with Corizon here at the All Male Indiana - New Castle Correctional Facility. I fought a true battle with the Facility to receive hormone therapy and finally won with the help of Kenneth Y. Falk from the ACLU - out of the Indianapolis Office. I had not started hormone therapy prior to my incarceration, all though I fought long and hard against


Volume 9, Issue 4

the health care provider Corizon/ Wexford and prison medical staff including administration. In Feb, Federal Judge - Jane Magnus Stinson ruled in my favor to receive hormone therapy. I also wanted to add to this letter that I miss the love of my life as we are living on opposite sides of the facility. I love and miss you dearly. So to all the others, sisters and brothers, out there fighting for your hormone therapy. Don’t give up the fight -without a fight. With much love, Breanna H. (IN) Hello Black and Pink, Just wanted to write you; I haven’t written for some time. I’m at Fort Dix, NJ, FCI. Someone had written to you about remembering their first time realizing their sexuality. I can remember when I was 10 years old. I idolized this teen who was 16 at the time. He was very popular in school and our neighborhood. He was a great athlete, DJ, skateboarder, and loved by all the girls and even some boys. I believed there was nothing he could not do. His name was Steve. He was like a dad that was always there when you needed him. We would tickle, horseplay, and wrestle each other all the time. We couldn’t keep our hands off of each other and I would grab his crotch and he would do the same to me. I liked that a lot and viewed it as natural fun and play. Steve would let me sit on his lap and he would hold me and we would cuddle like I was his boyfriend. We would kiss each

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other all over. I had heard that it was frowned upon, that guys would want to be with each other as though they were a girlfriend and boyfriend, but Steven made it feel like it was so normal. We would dance to music with each other, hold hands out in our neighborhood, and our friends didn’t have a problem with that. I didn’t call this gay until I was 18.

day.

I have spent a lifetime being in denial of who I really am. I’m now 49 years old. Even now, I still hide about 80% of the time. I feel I have to in order to avoid dealing with these inmates that are close-minded. I plan to be more open when I’m released.

Love y’all and thanks for allowing me to have someone I can talk and share with. Keep up the great job!

Love always, Jesse from Virginia

I sincerely hope and pray that this letter of “love” and encouragement find you all in the very best of health; and always in uplifting spirits. This is your homosexual (gay) sister Michelle.

To my brothers and sisters in this community, my community, one community: I appreciate all the work and help you guyz do for us, especially us behind these walls. I love y’all so much for it. I get a rush every time I wake up and see a Black & Pink mag on my gate and can’t wait to see what my family has been up to! Then, I can’t wait to receive the next one. I’m in a state pen in Pennsylvania and the one I am in is full of fake people or people who are not even worth talking to, because most of them don’t really have anything productive or constructive to talk about. We get new inmates on Tuesdays and Thursdays, so on those days I wake up hoping someone real will get off that bus! Someone I could be intimate with, someone I could hug a few times a

We take hugs for granted, even kisses on the cheek! I love transwomen pre- or post-op. But they don’t bring them to this jail and when they do, they get them out of here within a couple of months. I just feel so lonely all the time until I get my next Black & Pink issue.

“Dawg” (PA) Hello there! :) Smile…

I was laying here in my cell meditating and fantasizing...and I want each and every one of my brothers and sisters family of Black & Pink...as well as all my LGBTQ family...were heavy on my heart; and I just wanted to take a moment to let you all know that your always in my thoughts and prayers. And I love you all with all of my heart; and care deeply for you all. We are united in heart as a family; and must stand together. I am so very thankful for each one of the Black & Pink newsletters that I receive. Thank you for all your love, support, and dedication to all of us that are part of the LGBTQ family. I gain a large portion of my hope and strength from reading other people’s stories. It’s also very comforting


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Black & Pink News

REFLEXIÓN: “Contra Viento Y Marea” Hola mis queridos (@s) Hermanos (@s) LGBT Les escribo una vez más con el proposito de llevarles un mensaje de aliento y un muy caluroso saludo de todo corazón. Aun cuando los fuertes vientos soplen en mi contra trayendo consigo calamidad y tristeza; yo estaré en pie de lucha para soportar la tempestad sin importar su poder destructivo. Aun cuando la mar embravecida golpee con furia desenfrenada mi frágil embarcación hasta undirla en el profundo oceano; yo saceré la cabeza de las profundidades y me mantendré a flote para enfrentar con valor todas las adversidades. Aun cuando el dolor y la angustia golpeen mi corazón hasta quebrantarlo en menudos pedazos; tomaré cada pedazo con amor y derramaré mi amor sobre la angustia y el dolor hasta cubrirlos de amor. Aun cuando toda puerta se cierre y los caminos empedrados se llenen

de abrojos y espinos; yo seguiré tocando puertas hasta que alguna se abra, apartaré las piedras del camino y regaré los espinos hasta que broten las rosas. Aun cuando las tinieblas de la noche quieran opacar mis días para quebrantar mi Fe; yo seguiré alimentando esa luz de esperanza por el largo camino de la vida, porque se que triunfaré. Aun cuando el mundo entero me juzgue y me juzgue y me critique por mi Conversión y Convicción humana; no me voy a sucumbir ante las dificultades, sino que las tomaré como un nuevo reto con la frente bien en alto. Aun cuando el fracaso me haga caer en tierra una y otra vez; Una y otra vez me levantaré con más fuerzas para luchar y seguir adelante. Alguien dijo alguna vez: No te quejes por las espinas que crecen entre las rosas y da gracias por las rosas que crecen entre espinas.

By Alfredo R (OH)

June/July 2018

to know that I have so many Gay family member’s that support and love me for who I am. I was unfortunately born as male, but have always desperately wished to be a girl. I still live secretly as a girl within myself, never being bold enough to come out of the closet. But within is a precious and sweet little girl; that want’s more than anything in this world; to live openly as the girl I want so bad to be. But I just wanted to let all my Gay, Bisexual, Lesbian, and transgender sister’s know that you are being thought of...and I love and support you all. Thank you all for welcoming me with open arms into your loving Gay family. You all please take very good care of yourselves, and I’ll promise to do the same. Goodnite and God Bless! Stand firm for our rainbow! Love Always, Your Sister (Michelle) Thomas Also, I’d like to take a very special moment to wish everyone of the Black & Pink family; and all members of the LGBTQ Gay society know...that from the very bottom of my heart...I wish all of you a very special and blessed “Happy Valentine’s Day”! I wish nothing more than to have you all as my precious Valentine’s. It’s surely day of love...and is meant to be shared with the one’s you love the most. Give your heart to someone you love! Love you all dearly, Thomas (Michelle), Texas


Volume 9, Issue 4

Hey, What’s up? First off, my name is Shanelle, a.k.a. Mz Bubblez. I’m from Albuquerque, NM. I’m currently in the penitentiary of New Mexico here in Santa Fe, NM. I’ve been down 7 years. Now I”m 26 years old. I’m transgender and honestly very proud of who I am. I wanna send my love and most special shout out to all my beautiful Latina transwomen. Special shoutout to my wera’s negritas -- every mamacita doing time in the DOC around the world, you’re never alone. Always hold your head up high. God loves every single one of us. Always will. Haters are everywhere, but one thing I can say is: represent my bitchez. Ride, go hard, remember that together we rise. Together we’re stronger, brighter. Never look down, hold your head high, walk with style. Walk with attitude and pride. Love yourself, amor. My babies, Mz Bubblez will alwayz represent for us and future sisters to come. Thanks Black & Pink. Smile my ladies! Smile my vatos! LGBTI Transpride Shanelle L. - Bubblez - (NM) Dear Black & Pink family! Much love to the Black & Pink/ Hot Pink families, and the LGBTQ communities of true family, friends and precious loved ones. May peace, love and God be with you all and I pray that everyone is safe, warm and unwet during this messed up hurricane season! Well, your friend Edwin hasn’t

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written you in a long time and let me explain why. Well my friends, I’ve slid back from the organization I was in which I am an X member! But I have a lot of respect everywhere I go, you get tired of certain stuff after a certain age! I am in administrative segregation, I am housed by myself. Recently a tdcj guard was paid to put another inmate that was not supposed to be inside my cell. When I was being escorted back from rec, I felt something was not right and my natural instincts kicked in. When I stepped inside my cell and the door was closing, the inmate that was placed inside my cell, hiding, attacked me with a knife. While I was getting stabbed, the officer just stood and watch. He never tried to take the handcuffs off me, nor did he try to stop the attack! I got stabbed several times, and life flighted to the hospital, I went under surgery ASAP. I am blessed to say I survived that vicious attack, but that officer is going to bear the legal burden of what was happened and the crookedness of these texas correctional officers! I want to become successful and do some good inside urban communities, especially communities I was raised in! I’ve been there, done that, and lived that gangsta life since I was 15! When I am released from prison I am going to be a big brother motivational speaker and help those who wants to change! Even though I’m 28 I’ve seen and done things in my life most people would probably have nightmares from, but that is in the past. I have given my life to God and am on a new path! I am living with peace with myself, and am more focused and determined then I’ve ever been in my life.

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I want to send mad love to my home state New York, Bronx area! I’m hanging in there! Much love and respect to he LGBTQ community and everyone that’re supporters. Sincerely, Edwin (TX)

Believe I do believe the Lord above Created you for me to love He picked you out of all the rest Because he knew I’d love you best I had a heart and it was true but now it’s gone from me to you So take care of it as I have done for you have two and I have none. When our love will no longer share I’ll wait for you at Golden Stairs If you’re not there by judgement day I will assume you went the other way. Then I’ll return my Golden Wings My Golden heart and everything. And just to prove my love is true I’ll go through hell to be with you!

By Ms. Dream (TX)


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Hello BLACK & PINK FAMILY, My name is DEMIZ3, and this is my first attempt to write to BLACK & PINK. I have enjoyed reading the paper for many years, and have seen the progress. I feel proud knowing I am a part of such a strong, loving, and forgiving family. I have been incarcerated for a little bit over thirteen years. For the first time in my thirtyeight years sentence (FOR AGGRAVATED ROBBERY) I can see the possibility of getting out. IM SCARED. I have always known what I felt inside, and who I was. Except to the world I was something all together different. I was a womanizing, gun toting, drug abusing, gangster. All that to hide that I am a loving, artistic, realistic, woman. I accepted who I am a long time ago, but did not come out to the world till 2009. I lost some family and some so-called friends. I even lost a tooth in a fight with some one that did not think I should sit at the same table with him in the chowhall. I have been in population my entire time. This made things a little harder, but I never regretted my decision. I kept my head up no matter what the whispers said, or how the officers harassed and degraded me. I knew who I was, and for the first time I loved me. I think now, “When I get out, then what?” I see parole in 2023, and its coming fast. I do have my mom, daughter, nephew, and niece as my family support. I am grateful for each and every one of them. What worries me are the ones that use to know me, and what will come with that. I start my hormones soon and I know I will change in ways that I can’t go back, but that was never an option any ways. So I will stay strong and reach out to my community I have only read about. This is my way of

Black & Pink News

saying HELLO;), I want to come home. ALWAYS.. DEMIZ3, A TEXAS GIRL:) Dear Family, Royalty was the chosen name, I am currently serving time in a Texas Prison. I’ve chosen to write briefly about some real shit. I hope everyone will be able to dig me on. Ask yourself: what is my sole purpose of wanting to be a part of yet another organization? And when you discover the answer can I ask, have you truly found you? Because some people from the last 3 newsletters I got still feel offended by not being accepted in the public’s eyes when clearly all that’s stating is that you’re still ashamed of becoming the person you thought was really you. I am ROYALTY and yes I’m happy to be GAY. I been this way since I was like 6 years old. I didn’t join the LGBTQ organization to be accepted because I myself accept me for who I am and I love everything about it. Now I’m not gonna lie, I’m about to hurt some feelings, but hey it is what it is. Just as there are laws of the land, there are laws within jail/prison and we complain about the guards and the government breaking laws when in fact we are breaking them too. They tell us no sex in prison or jail - why go against it? I mean, that gives them every reason to buck that we are trying to continue getting established as a family first. We shouldn’t go into a prison worried, showing fear or even thinking like I’m not gonna have any friends... No! No! No! Be of good cheers. If we don’t be put on safekeeping, if that’s where we choose to go,

June/July 2018

don’t be scared that they denied you, follow the procedures and file paperwork. Prison was made to kill you mentally because once they capture the mind, your body too is dead to them... I have no family and I worried myself about nothing. I love everyone. I don’t even have sincere friends within this organization because they’re busy with their own lives and struggle and please understand it’s beyond wanted sex, fame and attention for real... Donald Trump still ain’t no match for us. We’ll defeat him too so please sisters I love y’all as myself. Be safe out there and in here and for those who are getting out anytime soon help those who truly need y’all because I have no one. I believe my info is on the pen pal list. I’m not seeking romance. I need friends who wanna sincerely be here not just me but all of us because really we forgotten... Royalty (TX) Dear Black & Pink Family My name is Bryan & I am not ashamed to say I’m a openly gay man stuck in this corrupt Texas prison on a messed up case which I have 14 flat years done on a 30 agg. I am 34 years old & I made a huge mistake when I was 20 & on all sorts of dope but since then I have lost every d**n thing imaginable! My family doesn’t want to write or come to visit me & all of my so called friends turned their backs on me. I am currently stuck in seg for a so called PREA violation becasue my “wife” was 2 faced & ran to the laws after we made love. I only receive the newspaper that Jason sends out & I’m so grateful to have my brothers & sisters. Love ya’ll & stay strong Bryan (TX)


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Volume 9, Issue 4

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Black & Pink Board of Directors

David Booth (Vice President), Tanya Nguyen (Clerk), Dominique Morgan (National Director / President), Douglas Rogers (Director), Zahara Green (Treasurer), Reed Miller (Director). June 2018 in Omaha, NE

Black & Pink Mailing Information Write to us at: Black & Pink — [see table below] 614 Columbia Rd. Dorchester, MA 02125 Please note that you can send multiple requests/ topics in one envelope! Due to concerns about consent and confidentiality, you cannot sign up other people for the newspaper. However, we can accept requests from multiple people in the same envelope. There’s no need to send separate requests in more than one envelope.

If you are being released and would still like to receive the Black & Pink News, please let us know where to send it! Penpal program info: LGBTQ prisoners can list their information and a short non-sexual ad online where free-world people can see it and decide to write. There will be forms in upcoming issues. Mail info: We are several months behind on our mail. There will be a delay, but please keep writing! Email us: members@blackandpink.org

If you would like to request: If you would like to request:

Address the envelope to: Address the envelope to:

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