blankpages Issue 22

Issue 22 May 2010

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Dressing up box She clops in her mothers cast off shoes. Handbag dangling from the crook of her arm - a tight lipped black envelope clasped shut on a receipt from Sainsbury’s, a water bill, a bag of mint imperials a stump of pink lipstick.

Cate Jacobs Liverpool poet Cate Jacobs is a challenging and engaging reader; she has lived with HIV since 1995 and although she has written for most of her life, the profound change that this has made to her life underpins and influences much of her work.

Bright coloured scarves swaddle her neck like the too tight umbilical that lassoed her at birth.

A floppy sun hat from last years beach holiday drowns her in straw.

She dresses up, in a borrowed life that doesn’t fit, inherits the wrong sized dream.

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Missing person (i) There was no news bulletin, police search, tracker dogs or reward offered. I searched alone - through dreams, friends, cradled dollies, books, language, libraries. Tentatively poked sticks into poogle holes, the roots of trees, in rock pools and under up turned boats. I searched through my mothers pockets, un scrambled sweet wrappers, looked through her jewellery box for evidence knowing there was something to remember between the blankets on the babies pram.

(ii) In the eyes of my new born children something I cannot name is reflected - a fleeting ghost that wails I’m here.

Remember me!?????

Something in the scent of wet and melting things; the sterile smell of amniotic fluid, fresh wee on terry nappies, babies dribble, calamine lotion, rosehip syrup, rice water, butter, plastacine, wax crayons, wet skin.

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Milk Time (to be read in a Welsh accent) On the carpet, with the slowcoaches, sucking milk through a soggy paper straw; warm, white cow slime slides down my throat, coating it with the taste of chewed grass.

The smell of piss and plastacine hangs in the air like the teachers threat Drink your milk up quickly, bach and then you can go out to play.

Mary Tucker can make her milk last until Mrs Evans rings the bell.

Mary Tucker doesn’t like going out to play on account of her curly hair.

Duw duw Catherine Mason such a fuss!

Drink up now, it‘s good for you!

I hate milk and I don’t want to drink up or down, I just want to go out.

Wynn Morgan comes in late with his mum, he’s been to the dentist. Wynn Morgan is always first to finish, likes football see, Mrs Evans says he’s the fastest milk drinker in the west.

Mrs Evans talks to Wynn’s mum in Welsh, Wynn Morgan sees an opportunity, he drinks my milk. I wrinkle my nose and laugh.

I am going to marry Wynn Morgan when I grow up.

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Alchemy

When the milk turned, it didn’t curdle but gathered in pools, a cradle cup collecting the simple scent of him, a glass of something new to nourish my bones. Milk wells with wishing smells of clover, elderflower and earth after rain, leaked the colour of white tulips bathed in the solarized blue of the December moon, and stars parted to leave the sky empty a space for me to fall in love with him.

And the brother who slipped - a second son into the world, wide eyed and smelling of April freshly mown grass, lemon vanilla, wild strawberries; was a lost lamb, that I learned to love; like a Chelsea bun that unwinds in cinnamon, seedless currents and sweet bread dough, topped with a sprinkled surprise of sugar that crunches between your teeth and leaves a sweetness that lingers, long after the baby has gone to sleep.

The little sister - who wouldn’t be dislodged easily from her womb world - smelt of rain, peaches, sea air, custard and bitter chocolate.

When my milk turned, it didn’t curdle, you just took it in turns to feed her with bottles of formula milk, while I hid, beneath a worn out yawn and watched you counting her fingers and toes. I’ve always hated milk, but if you could make me a milkshake in the flavours of my children’s smells, I’d miss any playtime and suck slowly with a soggy straw and never give my milk to Wynn Morgan again.

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Lone twin I write your shadow between the lines in milk, muted whispers of a sea wolf howling reminders at the moon.

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The fast-paced, ever evolving information world continues to have a dramatic, irreversible impact on our lives, anything from simple street signs to global economics and media, it seems like there is no part of human existence that isn’t sheltered from data, it is this overwhelming bombardment of information that I try to convey in my paintings.

This barrage of information creates a type of visual Internet that references a multitude of sources from the ancient past to the present day, natural or synthetic and the entire history of art.

From this the subject matter becomes broken up as large amounts of data are juxtaposed over, into and next to one another and freely exist on a single plane

battling for our attention and challenging our interpretations and understanding of the depicted objects, what constitutes an image and its component parts.

As in the real world, reliable true data can become drowned out, corrupted and confusing as borrowed and injected alien data can find its way into the artworks, this conflicting information further twists and stretches the original function and possibilities of the narrative.

By producing this visual melting pot it allows me to explore and recycle different pictorial approaches and thus creates a sense of dynamism and energy throughout the whole painting.

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Nicholas Dedics is an artist living and working in Manchester. Born near Leeds in 1986 he went on to study BA Fine Art at Coventry University, graduating with a first in 2009 he then moved to Manchester and works from a studio based in the city centre. Exhibiting throughout the country he has up coming shows in Kendal, Manchester and London.

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“When you do something involving given variables

is the product�

plank:arsenick

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Hot off the press and not so fresh from lurking the backstreets of Manchester’s seedier side come brand new act Plank! Fusing dark rhythmic experimental instrumental sprawlings and electronic soundscapes with a motorik manifesto the debut EP is to be released by local DIY institution aA Recordings. In their short existence Plank! have already shared the stage and dance floor with like-minded souls Fujiya & Miyagi, The Phantom Band, Crystal Antlers, The Time & Space Machine, Zombie Zombie, Lung, Rotter And Seven and Oneida. Be sure to check them out at a venue near you soon...

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Blank Media Collective Team: Director: Mark Devereux Financial Administrator: Martin Dale Development: Dwight Clarke, Annette Cookson Information Manager: Sylvia Coates Web Manager: Simon Mills Exhibitions Coordinators: Jamie Hyde, Marcelle Holt & Claire Curtin Special Projects Coordinator: Victoria Jones Live Music Coordinator: Iain Goodyear Blank Media Presents... Steve Goossens Official Photographer: Gareth Hacking

blankpages Team: Editor: John Leyland Fiction Editor: Phil Craggs Poetry Editor: Baiba Auria Music Editor: Dan Bridgwood-Hill Visual Editors / Designers: Henry Roberts & Michael Thorp

Blank Media is kindly supported by lazy dasies &