Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 by Blessed Magazine Ministries

Can Someone Be Born with the Wrong Gender?

October/November, 2017

How Are We Supposed to Ask God for Money? Are You a Bootleg Christian?

M A G A Z I N E

To Spank or Not To Spank Guidance for Parents Forgiving Dad A Personal Testimony

Using Sex as a Weapon or a Reward in Your Marriage The Worst Hypocrite of Them All Rejecting Jesus! You’re Not Ready, But Ready

Alpha Woman Syndrome: When Submission Isn’t Easy

8 Ways to Improve Your Walk in the Spirit

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Contents October/November, 2017

Inside This Issue

 Are You a Bootleg Christian? – 23  8 Ways to Improve Your Walk in the 23 Spirit – 25  The Worst Hypocrite of Them All – 29  Rejecting Jesus! You’re Not Ready, But Ready – 33

Relationships:  To Spank or Not to Spank? Guidance for Parents – 37 37  Using Sex as a Weapon or Reward in Your Marriage – 39  Alpha Woman Syndrome: When Submission Isn’t Easy – 50

Personal Wellness: 55  Can Someone Be Born with the

Wrong Gender? – 55  How are We Supposed to Ask God for Money? – 58

Feature Story:  Forgiving Dad - 63

16 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

Photo Courtesy of Shutterstock 2867356

Spiritual Wellness:

Forgiving Dad “I didn't understand how the man who taught me right from wrong could commit such a sin”

Cover Photo Shutterstock 121062757

Also in this issueâ&#x20AC;¦ 21 47 71 79

Letter from the Editor 8 Tips to Keep Your Bathroom Organized Soul Food Recipes for a Thanksgiving Feast Just For Fun

Question: Do You Know

Jesus?

Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 17

HELP SAVE MY CHILD! PLEASE SHARE EVERYWHERE

If anyone has seen or know the whereabouts of this little boy, please contact

Bryan Keathley pukydo@gmail.com 573 660 2346 cell 573 785 3713 home

Any Attorneys who would kindly help this family in need of assistance to get their little boy back is encouraged to contact Mr. Keathley

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Editor’s Corner

First, I always give all glory and honor to my Lord Jesus Christ for without Him in my life, nothing I could ever do would amount to anything!

It‘s one of my favorite times of the year. Thanksgiving!!! You know why? Because I have so much to be grateful for. God has been so wonderful to me and my family, I can‘t even begin to tell you how much without writing a novel or two. But even like me, you too have much to thank God for this Thanksgiving! I want to personally thank all of our fans and readers for their continued support of this ministry which has continued to strive and for that I am grateful to our Lord, Jesus Christ Our goal is to continue being a resource for Christians and others for years to come and with your support we can keep this publication available free of charge always on our digital platform Pray for us as we continue to pray for you and thank you for reading this issue of Blessed Magazine God bless you! Your Humble Servant in Christ,

Laraine Turner Editor-in-Chief

Letter From the Editor

Praise the Lord My Brothers and Sisters in Christ!

Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 21

22 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

Spiritual Wellness

Are You a Bootleg Christian? by Basic Ministry

There is nothing like having the REAL THING. There is nothing more in the world that upsets me more than PHONINESS. Whether it‘s things or even more irritating, phony people. Bootleg is when you make an illegal copy of something without permission. There are people that go around everyday selling Bootleg CD‘s and DVD‘s. They are making a profit off someone else‘s hard work. Did you know that there are even BOOTLEG Christians ? Well there are. Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 23

Spiritual Wellness 1st I should probably continue to explain what BOOTLEG is. Not only is BOOTLEG phony, it‘s made to look like the real thing.

pleasures. I don‘t want to cheat on my wife. Like it or not, that‘s just the way it is. If you can go on living like that that‘s you, but I choose to not be a BOOTLEG Christian looking like I‘m saved, but my actions & lifestyle say another thing.

Lets look @ what the Word of God has to say. 2 Timothy 3 says, ―But mark this: There will be terrible times in the last days. People will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, without love, unforgiving, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not lovers of the good, treacherous, rash, conceited, lovers of pleasures rather than lovers of God – having a form of godliness but denying its power. Have nothing to do with them. WOW ! That sounds like the day we are living right now. Notice they have a ―form of godliness‖. Now before I go on I must tell you that I am not here to dog anyone out about what they do in their on lives. Because if the truth be told I‘ve got issues also. LOTS OF THEM ! Matter of fact. there is a UNDER CONSTRUCTION sign posted on me. The point I‘m trying to make is that if you & I are going to live this life the way Christ wants us to live there are some things that should not be spoken of when we are in it. Some ―CHRISTIANS‖ trip on me because I choose not to drink. I don‘t drink because just like in the verses we read, I Love God more than I do

24 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

Bootleg Christians go to church, but don‘t want to live HOLY. Bootleg Christians read the Word, but don‘t live by it. Bootleg Christians sing songs of the Lord, but don‘t know the Lord of the songs. They look like they know God, but God is nowhere to be found when they are around their friends or co-workers. Notice what it says in the last verse of those scriptures, it says, HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THEM ! Now that does not mean that you can‘t be nice or talk to them, but don‘t partake in their CRAZINESS. Did you know that BOOTLEGGING is actually illegal ? So it is also in the spirit. Stop trying to access the things (Spiritual) of God without putting in time with God. God is not 2 be PIMPED ! ****A NOTE 2 REAL CHRISTIANS: Don‘t feel bad when people say that you are 2 Holy. Being Holy is a good thing ! 4 without it NO MAN shall see the Lord. Bootleg is not the original. Only God is Truth. He is & will always be the Truth. There is no phoniness in Him.

Spiritual Wellness Most people who by BOOTLEG are either to cheap or looking for a easy way to get something or want to look like other people. Notice all the BOOTLEG items that are out there. (Fendi, Gucci, L V) Get the real thing & that only comes from Gods son, the Lord Jesus Christ.

by Beliefnet

8 Ways to Improve Your Walk in the Spirit Walking in the Spirit, is living out of the Divine nature that God has given us. Here are 8 ways to help you along your spiritual journey! 1) Embrace Your Identity – Grab hold of who you are in Christ. Understand that you are a spirit, who has a soul and live in a body. The Bible says that we are children of God, meaning you have an eternal parent that cares for you, is on your side and cheering you on in righteousness 2) Deny Your Flesh – Yes, that‘s it allow your spirit to say no to your flesh. Every time you do this, you are asserting spiritual dominion and letting your flesh know that God is in control. It may be difficult at first, but keep pressing into God‘s power for breakthrough

Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 25

Spiritual Wellness 3) Kingdom Thinking – Jesus tells us to ―Seek first the Kingdom of Heaven…and God‘s righteousness.‖ This means prioritize your thought-life around the Kingdom of God. Think about the things that God thinks about, concern your heart with the things God is concerned about and fashion your thought patterns after what Paul teaches in Philippians 4:8 4) Pray and Listen – Have you ever talked to someone who just dominated the conversation and never let you say one word? This is what it‘s like when we pray ‗at‘ God and do not take time to listen to Him. Think of prayer as Divine dialogue… listen just as much as you talk 5) Avoid Strife – Walking in the Spirit means walking in harmony with God and others. Guard your heart and tongue from bickering, bitterness and conflict. Learn to rest in Him and He will fight your battles. You need only to be still 6) Self Examination – Allow the word of God to examine you. Get real with yourself and put yourself on the altar of examination before God. This will help you remove the ‗weeds‘ before they take root 7) Know Your Weakness – This is important and cannot be over looked. You must learn your weaknesses, because the truth is the enemy knows your weaknesses better than you do. Understanding this area and yielding them to the Holy Spirit will strengthen you and help you discern and avoid temptations and pressures 26 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

8) Remember Your Helper – The Holy Spirit is your best friend and your eternal mentor. Lean on Him and remember Jesus sent Him to walk along side you in your spiritual journey on Earth. Take your troubles to Him daily. Some days will be better than others, but He will be there to keep you on the path

Tom Hanks is not affiliated with Blessed Magazine or any of its agents

Remember, if you are ashamed to confess Jesus before the world, He will likewise deny you before His Father which is in heaven â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Matthew 10:32

Spiritual Wellness

The Worst Hypocrite of Them All As I write this article, I am humbled by the conviction of God's Word in my life. I dedicate my time to tell people about the Lord. Steer them in the right direction. Hope and pray all who I come in contact with will fall in love with Jesus, but there is something wrong with this picture...

I am a hypocrite... Yes, and probably the worst one of them all because as much as I try to live this life of dedication; I find myself doing just the opposite

Don't get me wrong... I love God, but in my own way and I am constantly reminded that if you don't keep His commandments, you really don't love Him, but who's to say I don't...yes, you guessed it - God says it Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 29

Spiritual Wellness I can relate to Paul when he stated in Romans 7:14-20:

"14 For we know that the law is spiritual: but I am carnal, sold under sin. 15 For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I.

16 If then I do that which I would not, I consent unto the law that it is good. 17 Now then it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me. 18 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. 19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do. 20 Now if I do that I would not, it is no more I that do it, but sin that dwelleth in me I can sit here and type the old saying "God knows my heart" and yes He does, but to live this life as I teach and preach it is only a reflection in the mirror as I see myself totally opposite in my actions and my thoughts I teach don't lie, but I lie. I teach love one another, but I find myself hating on certain

30 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

people. I teach people how to get close to God, but I don't apply those words to my life. I teach pray more, fast more and read your bible, but I only pray when someone asks me to pray, never the initiative to pray on my own and read the bible and fast....well...wow what can I say I don't write this to discourage anyone from living and loving the Lord; for this is not my intent, but my intent is to employ the prayers of those who truly have a connection with God to pray for my deliverance from the life of carnality to that of spirituality

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Spiritual Wellness

Rejecting Jesus! Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re Not Ready, But Ready By Laraine Turner

In spite of the fact that some people think living for Jesus is about living a life of doom and gloom, no fun, living in poverty, hard and difficult, this is certainly not true! It is a common phrase you hear from people when asked "Have you given your life to Jesus?" and they will reply..."I'm not ready to do that now" Not fully understanding what they are really saying is that they are not ready to live for Jesus, but ready to die without Him! Christianity is viewed as taboo for individuals because of the countless doctrines of churches comprised by man that hinders would be Christians from repentance and turning their lives over to Jesus Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 33

Spiritual Wellness Living for Jesus is simple and does not come with rules on top of rules. His way is to love and honor. Love and honor God and love one another. When you love God, you will do all you can to not disappoint Him. No commandments would be broken and loving people would be easy Today I want to illustrate to all who read this post that the misconceptions the world has portrayed about turning your life over to Jesus is exactly what it is...a misconception

Jeremiah 29:11 - For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope Isaiah 54:17 - No weapon formed against you shall prosper, And every tongue which rises against you in judgment You shall condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the LORD, And their righteousness is from Me," Says the LORD

I want to point out a few of the good things about living for Jesus...

John 14:27 - Peace I leave with you, my peace I give to you; not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid

He‘s able to protect you from everything and everyone He‘s able to supply all your needs He‘s able to be with you every step of the way (never leave or forsake you)

Matthew 6:33 - But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well

1. 2. 3.

Jesus doesn't want us to live in poverty or live unhappy. He wants the complete opposite. Nothing but the best for us when we give our lives to Him Here are some scriptures which reflect the life Jesus desires for those who trust Him with their lives...

Philippians 4:19 - But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus Luke 12:7 - But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows

34 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

God is love and everything about Him is love. There is nothing hard about serving Him

Relationships

To Spank or Not to Spank Guidance for Parents

By Kirwin Narine

"Don't fail to discipline your children. They won't die if you spank them. Physical discipline may well save them from death." Proverbs 23:13

I see the government is interested in parenting the nation. Physical discipline is an act of love towards a child, however many parents abuse their children out of frustration, anger or even hate. No child wants "Zorro" for a parent.

Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 37

Relationships It is constantly reported that our daughter is one of the most obedient children in her school. The secret ingredient is pure love. Unfortunately, many parents turn to the rod not as a means of discipline but as a means of venting. I would like to suggest to parents some strategies for discipline - the goal is discipline not blows. 1. 2. 3. 4.

Love your child unconditionally Talk to your child and explain the danger of their behavior Use creative ways of discipline â&#x20AC;&#x201C; No TV, No games, etc. Share some licks when needed

If you fill your home with love, you will find that physical discipline is mostly needed in the early years of your child. Let's suppose your child (2 years) kept on trying to stick a fork into the electrical socket. You might not be able to explain the workings of electricity, however a swift lash on the child's hand says - Danger, although, I don't understand I must stop now! - you might save their life....better a loving lash than an electrical one... As your child grows, your love will be sufficient for them to believe and trust your words. My daughter begins to cry once we speak to her sternly. I think she would prefer the licks than hurting her mom or dad. As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Who ever heard of a child who is never disciplined by its father? 38 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

The VERY WORST thing a parent could do is spank their child and enforce destructive identity beliefs verbally at same time. For example: "You stupid! You are a bad boy! You are just like your father! I didn't raise a foolish child!" The pain of "licks" creates the doorway to implant destructive beliefs into the heart of a child. These beliefs can shape your child's identity for the rest of their lives. Always CORRECT the action but AFFIRM your child's identity as a child of God. So when I correct my daughter, it normally starts like this, "That's not you...." or "You are a Jesus girl...." When your child is disciplined they should feel intensely loved by you and feel that your correction is bringing them back to their true identity. Your face should be filled with love, compassion and even tears as you physically discipline your child. If you are angry - STOP! - discipline yourself - think! There is no more contradictory sight than to see a parent screaming and shouting "you mad, you crazy" - while this parent demonstrates true madman behavior! Whatever you do, love your children unconditionally - always make sure that they know that their behavior good or bad will never affect your love for them. Then you can say, "Oh baby, daddy loves you, if I didn't love you, I would leave you to do wrong but because I love you, I must correct and discipline you..."

Relationships Hebrews 12:6 - "For the LORD disciplines those he loves, and he punishes each one he accepts as his child. As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as his own children. Who ever heard of a child who is never disciplined by its father? If God doesn't discipline you as he does all of his children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really his children at all."

Question: Do You Know

Jesus?

Using Sex as a Weapon or a Reward in Your Marriage? By Neil Rosenthal

Differing sexual appetites is often the nature of romance and marriage. But if your mate is angry with you, or if he/she wants to fight, distance or control you, then withholding sex may be the most powerful way to get your attention. Withholding sex–or using sex as a weapon–is used in many intimate relationship to punish, win a power struggle or to get you to do things your partner‘s way Withdrawing sex is often related to not wanting to feel controlled or dictated to. If you feel controlled or consumed by your mate‘s demands, the one power you always hold is to not choose to give your body up to him or her. One doesn‘t withhold sex as a weapon because he or she feels powerful,

Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 39

Relationships confident and secure. It‘s done because he or she feels powerless and insecure. Paradoxically, the person who is sexually rejecting or closed is usually perceived by their mate as being very powerful and controlling. Being sexual with someone you love, care about and are committed to means that you are offering nurturance, TLC, affection and closeness. Withholding sex may mean that one person feels the need to distance things a bit in order to keep him or herself feeling safe and protected.

tremendous conflict, anger and retaliatory behavior, and can easily threaten and destabilize an otherwise healthy relationship. One solution to this dilemma is to ask your mate what he or she needs in order to freely and unreservedly give you what you sexually want. This is the ―I‘ll spoil you, and I need for you to spoil me also‖ attitude.

This is about adopting the attitude that the best way to not get hurt again in a relationship is to not give anyone the chance to get close enough. The problem then becomes how to be ―safe‖ without being too withdrawn or distant, or how to be close while still feeling protected from possible rejection. If someone emotionally and/or sexually withdraws from their relationship, the price for such withdrawal is likely to be that he or she will feel indifferent, distant and unloving. So of course over the long run, there is also likely to be less sexual desire. The problem is that one person in the relationship–simply by not having sex– will feel safe, while the other person won‘t feel desired, nurtured, cared for or given to. This can, and often does, lead to

40 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

Secondly, too much emotional safety in a relationship is a form of death. You‘re protected, but you can‘t be happily engaged in a relationship with another person because you‘re emotionally shut down. Challenge yourself to not be so safe and self-protective. You may need to take some emotional risks and learn how to let go of your fears and grievances so you can trust.

Relationships If you act fearful, safe or self-protective in a relationship, you will not love. So find ways of not being so self-protective. Allow your relationship to be more important than your fear or anger youâ&#x20AC;&#x2DC;re experiencing at the moment. Thirdly, a man is likely to get more sex if is acts as if he values his woman and continuously woos her. There are exceptions to the above rule, but most women will respond well to a man who is obviously trying. Finally, the two of you need to directly confront the causes for the self-protection, and how your relationship can feel safer and more secure.

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Want to be part of a ministry to encourage, uplift and inspire individuals? Blessed Magazine is now recruiting individuals who desire to make a difference in the lives of others through responding to posts If you are interested, please send us a short paragraph outlining why you would be a candidate to become a part of the Blessed Magazine team Send inquiries to contact@blessedmagazine.org Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 41

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For Your Home

8 Tips To Keep Your Bathroom Organized By LTD Commodities

It may be a small space, but the bathroom can potentially have a lot of clutter. If your bathroom is in need of some organization, here are 8 tips to get you started in the right direction. Purge & Pitch Before you start organizing, it's best to get rid of the stuff you don't really need or the expired stuff that should be thrown away. Check expiration dates on medications and vitamins in the medicine cabinet, and keep tabs on how long you've had your makeup. Each product, from lipstick to mascara, has a different shelf life. If you have a hard time remembering when you purchase cosmetics, add a small label with the month and year so you'll know when it's time to toss.

Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 47

For Your Home Contain The Clutter Once you've decided which cosmetics and beauty products you want to keep, it's time to get it organized. A simple makeup organizer adds instant order to your daily beauty products, and keeps your favorites within easy reach for your makeup routine. Find one with individual compartments and drawers to separate brushes, lipsticks, eyeliners and compacts

Add Bathroom Storage A slim cabinet or shelf unit is an excellent way to add must-needed storage to the bath. If floor space is at a premium, however, consider installing bathroom storage shelves. Look for shelves that will securely hold your beauty products, styling tools and other daily essentials

Double-Duty Bath DĂŠcor Don't let decorative items take up precious counter space. Instead, incorporate style and a splash of color with items that offer both form and function. Transfer cotton balls, cotton swabs and hair accessories to pretty storage jars. For a fresh take on mouthwash, pour it into a modern decanter with a tight lid

48 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

For Your Home Bathroom Cabinet Organizers The cabinet under the sink often becomes the place where everything just gets tossed and forgotten. Cut through the chaos and pitch what you don't need, then add caddies or other storage bins to keep things organized. Even underused home accessories like decorative baskets can find new purpose in a bathroom. If your cabinet is deep, consider purchasing a basket or drawer that pulls out so you have easy access to what's in the back

Creative Towel Storage If your towel rack isn't big enough to hang the family's towels, add hooks to the bathroom. Towel hooks are inexpensive, easy to mount, and create a space for each member of the family to hang their towel.

Do More With Doors

Tame The Toilet

Make the most of vertical space behind closed doors. Try additional shelves, racks, hooks and hanging baskets on the back of existing vanity or closet doors. Add hooks to the back of the bathroom door for jewelry, robes, scarves and hair accessories.

Create added storage space with a tank shelf, or mount some over-the-toilet shelves and cabinets. You can organize a large amount of toiletries, towels, tissues and more within just a small amount of space

Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 49

Relationships

Alpha Woman Syndrome: When Submission Isn‘t Easy By Anna Diehl

Some women are born to lead. When they get in any group situation, they instinctively assume the alpha position: giving the orders, claiming the highest authority, and exuding domination. If this is you, then you‘re who we‘re talking to in this post. 50 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

Relationships Now if God has created you to be an alpha, you probably recoil at the thought of submitting to anyone. To you, submission means quietly following, acting passive, and holding back. None of these things are you. You don‘t follow, you lead. You aren‘t quiet, you‘re loud. You don‘t hold back, you charge ahead. If you tried to sit on yourself enough to come across as passive, you‘d probably explode. There are many men and women in the Church today who will try to make you feel bad for being an alpha woman. But God doesn‘t see this as a bad thing at all. God likes His alpha women, and He always makes sure He has some around for when the alpha men fall down in their duties. God has used alpha women to save the day on countless occasions throughout history. God loves variety, and you‘re like a pungent spice: a little of you goes a long way, but your presence adds so much to the group that things seem terribly dull without you. Don‘t let anyone convince you that being an alpha woman is a flaw. It‘s not a flaw, it‘s a beautiful part of your design. You‘re like a wild stallion in a field: full of fiery determination and independent drive. You don‘t need other people to affirm your decisions for you because you know your own mind. You‘re not afraid to go against norms and take on new challenges. You are brimming with potential and God has glorious plans for you. Now for a wild stallion to be useful, it must learn to submit to a human trainer. In the same way, you also need to learn

submission if all your energy and passion is going to be funneled in the right direction. But here‘s the important bit: the target of your submission is God, not men. As an alpha, you are wired to dominate other humans. Submitting to them just isn‘t how your brain works, and if you try to pull these skills out of the air, it‘s going to be a train wreck.

You‘ll end up feeling suffocated and depressed, and your efforts to submit will only end up making you hate the person you‘re submitting to. Why? Because in your mind the whole thing is stupid. Submitting to a human just because of their gender doesn‘t make any sense. You don‘t think men are superior to you, in fact, you‘ve met many men who you really don‘t respect because they seem too spineless. You admire strength. But too much strength leads to conflict, which is why you are best suited to marry a nonalpha man. A man who is happy to let you

Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 51

Relationships lead is a far better match than a man who wants to lead as much as you do. When two alphas try to get together and function as equals, the result can be an endless battle for rank. You want harmony in your marriage, not constant bickering, so you‘re better with a man who doesn‘t mind you taking the lead in most areas.

But the day is still going to come when the man‘s instincts are better than yours, or when God wants you to let your husband have his way in something. In these moments, if you try to base your motivation for submitting on the fact that your husband is a male and on a handful of annoying verses in the New Testament, you won‘t get very far. The only way for you to see submission as a positive thing is if the one you‘re submitting to is far more glorious than you are. Then your submission will be sincere, and then you‘ll be able to put your whole heart into it. Your three glorious Creators are the only 52 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

Ones who qualify as being worthy of total submission. It was never Their intention for you to submit to other humans to the degree that you submit to Them You need to see your Gods as the only Ones you will submit to in life, but then you need to submit to Them 100%. No holding back, no half measures. You need to use that charge ahead temperament of yours to your advantage and give your Creators everything you have, asking Them to have Their total way in your life and asking Them to make pleasing Them your greatest passion. Then you‘ll no longer have to worry about this whole godly submission in marriage package, because it will be taken care of. When God asks you to let your husband have his way in something, you‘ll be glad to do it out of loyalty to your King. A proper submission mindset will fill you with inspiring motivations. Pleasing God, honoring God, showing your loyalty to Him: these are goals you can get into. Contrary to what many people think, alphas love to please, but they aren‘t motivated by the same rewards. Pleasing people and preserving harmony in groups just doesn‘t do it for them. Alphas aren‘t built to be peace keepers and diplomats, they are built to be warriors who will gladly cause division and strife in order to accomplish important goals. They need their reward to come down from someone higher ranking than themselves, and since they rarely feel outranked in social groups, this isn‘t easy to arrange. But God is the

Relationships supreme Commander–He is the exalted King who no one can ever come close to dethroning. This makes His commendation priceless. Pleasing God and being rewarded by Him–that‘s motivating for an alpha woman.

make you less than an alpha woman, because that is one request He just isn‘t going to grant.

God loves His alphas and He knows how to talk to them in ways that inspire their souls. He is never going to tell you to sit down and shut up. He isn‘t going to tell you that you need to be less. That‘s how humans talk because humans are threatened by your natural fire and they‘re always trying to find some way to douse it. But God loves your fire and instead of telling you to stop blazing, He‘s going to teach you how to blaze at the right moments. There are times for charging in and times for strategically holding back. It‘s never about trying to morph into some shrinking violet who views herself as the inferior gender. No one is inferior in God‘s Kingdom. We are all of great value to Him, and we all have designated roles that He has equipped us to thrive in. Don‘t let bad teaching in the Church convince you that God has no use for strong-willed, alpha women. He most certainly does. If God had wanted you to be some quiet, shy little thing, then that‘s how He would have made you. But instead He made you a wild stallion: eagerly pawing the ground, always ready to charge into the fray, and brimming with courageous confidence. Surrender yourself entirely into God‘s hands and ask Him to make you all that He wants you to be. But don‘t ask Him to

Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 53

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Personal Wellness

Can Someone Be Born with the Wrong Gender? We live in a confused and fallen world, and that confusion extends everywhere, so that even the most basic questions, like ―what gender am I?‖ become difficult for some people to answer. Some people claim they were born as the wrong gender, or at least in the wrong body. A man may believe he is actually a female, but his soul is ―stuck‖ in a male body. Such claims receive support from others who advocate a ―gender-neutral‖ society. But those who view gender distinctions as nothing more than arbitrary labels or a ―box‖ to be broken out of are actively rejecting God‘s design in creation. Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 55

Personal Wellness Fundamental to our understanding of human sexuality is that God created two (and only two) genders. Currently, the world likes to consider gender (based on a social construct) as having nothing to do with sex (based on physicality), but the Bible makes no such distinctions. The Bible cuts through the world‘s confusion simply: ―Male and female He created them‖ (Genesis 1:27). All the modern-day speculation about multiple genders—or even a gender ―continuum‖ with unlimited genders—is unbiblical. An individual may claim to be transgender or ―gender-fluid,‖ but that doesn‘t nullify God‘s design and purpose in creating him or her. Children growing up in this confused world are bombarded with messages of confusion. Little boys are told they don‘t have to be boys; girls are told they might not really be girls. Whatever they feel they are is what they are—boy, girl, or a mixture of the two. The world tells them it doesn‘t matter. The confusion and ambiguity are reinforced in many ways: gender-neutral days at school, the banning of terms such as boys and girls in the classroom, the proliferation of unisex restrooms, curricula that promotes homosexual marriage, etc. It‘s little wonder that some people grow up struggling with their sexual identity. But our Lord warned against leading children astray: ―Jesus said to his disciples: ‗Things that cause people to stumble are bound to come, but woe to anyone through whom they come. It would be better for them to

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be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around their neck than to cause one of these little ones to stumble‘‖ (Luke 17:1– 2). Some people today state that they have ―felt like the opposite gender since they were children.‖ But how would one know that? To what are they comparing their feelings? How people feel is all they know, and, for each person, how he feels is ―normal‖ for him. Any comparisons to other people‘s feelings would only be an assumption. Some people may become convinced that they ―felt like the opposite gender‖ at some point in their lives, but they don‘t truly have a baseline comparison. Given enough conditioning, any one of us can be convinced that we identify more as the opposite gender. Too often, certain individuals are labeled as cross-gendered because of natural differences in mannerisms and responses, and those individuals ―back-paint‖ the concept into their understanding of their childhood. But this reimagining of one‘s childhood is different from wishing to be another gender. A person can wish he was the other gender for many reasons, but that doesn‘t make it internally so. A parent can instill that desire in a child, or a child can observe benefits enjoyed by the other gender and desire them. The child can also desire to be seven feet tall, but it doesn‘t change reality.

Personal Wellness The Bible says that God created ―male and female‖ and He pronounced His creation ―very good‖ (Genesis 1:27, 31). God‘s plan was perfect, but, as with everything in mankind‘s sphere, perfection was corrupted by sin. Sin brought anomalies, and we would be hard pressed to understand where the touch of this contamination ends in the creation. Could an anomaly sometimes occur in gender, physically or mentally? We acknowledge that a person can be born with a combination of male and female organs— although one‘s true, biological sex can be determined through medical tests. This we know, that we are involved in a spiritual battle for our souls. The world seeks to conform us to its mold, which is why we must be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:1–2). Satan attempts to deceive us and urges us to question God‘s plan. One of the devil‘s ploys is to make us dissatisfied with how God made us. To some he whispers, ―You‘re fat and ugly.‖ To others, ―You‘re stupid and clumsy.‖ And to still others, ―You look like a boy, but you‘re really a girl.‖ In each case, the underlying message is the same: ―God messed up on you.‖ This we also know, that the whole creation groans for release from the curse and damage of sin (Romans 8:20–22). The ruin wrought by sin is addressed through the redemption of Christ. Through salvation, Jesus Christ grants us forgiveness of sin, reverses the effect of our poor choices, and compensates for our brokenness.

Each of us faces a different set of battles. Yet Christ sets us on the path to victory. Hebrews 12:1–2 states, ―Let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.‖ The cross is key. Jesus pioneered our faith, and He will perfect it. His victory will be ours as well. Some may battle heterosexual temptation, greed, pride, anger, or any number of sins. Someone else may battle gender confusion. Regardless of the battle with sin and the devil‘s lies, the question we must answer is, ―Is Christ and His redemptive work sufficient for our battles?‖ Jesus definitely claims to be sufficient for any and all of our battles, and He desires to sanctify us through His Word of truth (John 17:17). As children of God, we should be content in this life (Philippians 4:11; 2 Corinthians 12:10). We realize that we all have limitations, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. But through Christ those limitations will not interfere with the plan God has for us to honor Him and serve Him. ―Do not be afraid, little flock, for your Father has been pleased to give you the kingdom‖ (Luke 12:32). If a person feels he or she has been born as the wrong gender, the answer is not Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 57

Personal Wellness gender-reassignment surgery, hormone therapy, cross-dressing, etc. Those are simply worldly ways of acquiescing to the devil‘s lies. ―Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth‖ (1 Corinthians 13:6). And God does not make mistakes. The one who feels he or she was born in the wrong body needs, first and foremost, to experience the transformative power of Christ. When we ―participate in the divine nature,‖ we escape ―the corruption in the world caused by evil desires‖ (2 Peter 1:4). Article Shared with Permission by Got Questions at www.gotquestions.org

How are We Supposed to Ask God for Money? By Anna Diehl

In this world, money is revered as a god. We‘re taught to believe that money has the power to make our lives more comfortable and give us access to health, fame, power, and friends. And once we have all of these things, how can we not be satisfied? Once we buy into the lie that money is the magic solution to all of our problems, of course we will want more of it, and in the Church you will find many teachers and preachers encouraging you to make money your god. Of course they won‘t put it to you this way, but this is their bottom line, for once we‘re willing to dishonor the real God in order to squeeze more money out of Him, it‘s quite clear where our priorities lie. Many Christians love money more than they love God, and they were guided into that position by shepherds who claimed to be teaching them how to apply biblical promises. We don‘t want this to happen to you, so we are going to teach you how to pray about the subject of money with the right attitude. 58 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

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Personal Wellness Whenever we talk to God, we want to be totally honest. We all struggle with greed, fear, and a lust for nice things that we can‘t afford. These things come with the fallen flesh package, so don‘t try to deny it and don‘t beat yourself up about it. Just be honest. “God, I really want more money. It seems like it would make my life so much easier.” This is how you start, but don‘t stop here because this focus isn‘t going to take you in the right direction. We don‘t want to spend our prayer time just focusing on our flesh. We want to acknowledge our desires, but then we need to go further and apply the wisdom God has given us. As Christians, there are three critical truths we need to bear in mind when we‘re thinking about money. God is intimately involved in every aspect of our lives. This means He is the One controlling how much money we have access to. God knows what we need and He knows what is best for our souls. His priorities are far better than ours. We need to trust His wisdom. It would be extremely foolish to ask God to compromise His best plan for our lives. If we want to thrive, we need to submit to His will in all things. With these key principles in mind, we now continue our prayer.

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―Even though I want more money, I know that my relationship with You is the far more important thing and I don‘t want You to give me anything that would compromise that. I want Your best plan for my life. I want You to be pleased with me and honored by the way my life unfolds. I can‘t help hoping that more money fits into Your future plans for me, but if it doesn‘t, help me to stay aligned with You and to trust Your higher wisdom. Fill my soul with so much love for You that nothing else ever comes close to taking Your place in my heart. I want You to be my First Love, and I want pleasing You to be my first priority. Thank You that I can talk to You about everything. I know that By You understand my Anna Diehl human perspective and that You care about all my concerns. Make me everything that You want me to be. Help me find total satisfaction in You alone, and make everything else in my life go the way You want it to go. I love You. Help me to love You more every day.‖ If this is the way you pray about money, then you are going to experience great progress in the faith. A prayer like this is keeping your focus where it needs to be: on God, not on material things. Notice that you are totally honest about what you want—this is how God wants it. Don‘t try to pretend something isn‘t important to you when He already knows that it is. Be honest. Be real. If you‘re frustrated about your tight budget, say so. If you‘re afraid of not being able to pay the bills, be honest about it. But then let the Holy Spirit guide your focus onto the things

Personal Wellness that really matter. God is with you. He is directing your life in a very purposeful way. He loves you more than you can even fathom. He has wonderful plans to satisfy your soul and He will fill you with deep joy and peace if you will align with His priorities. So by all means, present your requests to God. But always end by acknowledging that His ways are far better than yours and surrender your situation into His hands. This is how you will avoid getting sucked down the path of greed and bribery that so many Christians have strayed onto. Don‘t try to butter God up in the hopes that He‘ll feel obligated to bless you. Don‘t throw extra money into the offering plate in hopes that He‘ll return your gift tenfold. God detests this kind of hypocrisy. Can you blame Him? Do you enjoy being manipulated and schmoozed by your friends? God is not just some blessing vending machine. He is your King, Counselor, Father, and Friend. Treat Him with respect, cherish your relationship with Him, and you will go far in the faith.

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Feature Story “I didn't understand how the man who taught me right from wrong could commit such a sin”

By Amber Penney

I don't think I heard a word of the sermon that Sunday. The whole morning seemed to move in slow motion. I didn't greet my friends with the excitement typical of a college student home for the weekend. I was more like a zombie. My family sat together in our usual row, each of us dreading what was to come. As we stood for the reading of Scripture, my mind returned to a hot and humid morning in May several months before … I had just finished my freshman year of college. I had only two weeks to spend with my family before heading off to a summer missions project. I was busy unpacking and re-packing when my dad told me he needed to talk to me about something. We walked outside, and as he leaned against my car, the look in his eyes told me he had something very serious to say. Standing in uncomfortable silence, I tried to anticipate what that something might be. My heart quickened as tears choked his efforts to speak. He must be dying, I thought. "Haley is your sister," he said through his tears. My expression changed from fear to shock.

My dad said all he needed to say. In that one sentence he told me his friendship with a co-worker had been more than friendship, and as a result, I had a 2-year-old Sister. .My mind reeled. I had babysat her when she was a baby. "Does Mom know?" I asked. "Yes, she's known for a while," he explained. "We waited to tell you because we didn't want you to have to deal with this while you were away at school. "You probably won't want to talk to me very much," he said. "But I want you to know you can say whatever you need to say to work through this."

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Feature Story At that point I couldn't imagine not wanting to talk to him, and I certainly didn't want to say hurtful things. I could see he was in enough pain already. I pulled him close and hugged him fiercely, wanting him to know I still loved him. "Daddy, I forgive you," I said. "If I couldn't forgive you, then I wouldn't deserve forgiveness.â&#x20AC;&#x2022;

I meant what I said. But I had yet to experience the hurt and the bitterness of betrayal. I was still in shock. So I really couldn't understand what forgiving him meant. I went on to the missions project and had a good summer. But all the while I was trying to ignore questions which left me feeling uneasy. How could he? was usually the one that got me started. Then I'd begin thinking about God's punishment. How is God going to punish Daddy? Will he punish me, too? Sometimes I'd think about my little sister. Her life can't be a mistake, can it? Then was her birth a part of God's plan? When I headed back to school in the fall, I was still trying so hard to be strong, despite the questions that clouded my mind. I read that "all things work together for good" (Romans 8:28) and assumed God could somehow use the experience in my ministry to others. I told myself the pain would make me stronger, so I should be joyful. I didn't know it

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was OK for me to hurt first and maybe even get a little angry. So I bottled up everything inside. Then one night as I was attempting to study in the library, I reached the breaking point. I was staring at pages of notes, but not really seeing any words, when it hit me: My dad had an affair, and I have a little sister. A forceful tide of emotion swept over me when, as if for the first time, I acknowledged the reality of the situation. I jumped up from my seat and began to run toward the door, afraid I wouldn't make it before the tears began to gush. Once outside I kept running in the cool night air, searching for a secluded place to unleash the pent-up emotions. I think I cried for two hours straight. They weren't the sort of tears that just trickle down your cheeks, either. They were screaming, coughing, suffocating sobs, the kind that make your lungs burn. I was still thinking about that night of tears when the last verses of "Just As I Am" brought me back to the packed sanctuary. I scanned the congregation, thinking about all those who would hear my dad confess his sin of adultery and wondered how they would react. My mind was in turmoil. On one hand I respected him for taking responsibility for his actions. He could have run from it, but instead he faced it head on. Yes, I was proud of him for that. But on the other hand, I felt a deep sense of shame, as if I were the one who had committed the act. I wanted to keep it a secret to save myself from embarrassment. But then what about Haley? How could we keep her a secret?

Feature Story My heart began to beat faster as I watched my dad make his way to the front of the church. He and my pastor had already talked about his decision to share his confession. I can't believe this is happening, my mind screamed. Surely I'm going to wake up from this nightmare! As our pastor motioned for the congregation to be seated, I locked my arm around my older brother's and squeezed his hand firmly. He extended his other hand to my mom, who, with head bowed, prayed silently. As my dad began to speak, I could see his lower lip quivering. Tears streamed down my face. This has to be the hardest thing he has ever done, I thought. "What I do now, I do for one reason and one reason onlyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;obedience, that the name of God may be glorified," he began. He went on to confess his sin of adultery. He also admitted lying to members of the church when they confronted him about the affair. "What I did, I did to protect my family," he explained. "While I'm ashamed of what I've done, I'm not ashamed of my daughter, Haley," he said. He asked for forgiveness, and then he walked back to his seat. By this time my mom, my brother and I were all sobbing, but to my amazement, we weren't treated as if we all had scarlet A's embroidered on our chests. Our church family surrounded us after the service, embracing us in love. Men my dad had lied to came and hugged him. They cried together as they began the process of reconciliation.

I left church that day with a better understanding of what the body of Christ is supposed to be. But I still had a lot of questions. That morning was only the beginning of the healing process. I would go on to learn that forgiveness is a daily choice of moving toward the one who has hurt you, a daily choice to endure the pain caused by that person.

I would later come to the conclusion that, yes, God was in control of the whole situation, but it was never his will for my dad to sin. However, because of his awesome grace and mercy, he can take even our sins and use them for his glory. As for the fear of punishment, I had to come to a whole new understanding of the gospel. I'm sure I had heard a million times that Jesus' death paid the penalty for our sins, but it didn't really occur to me that the payment covered not only the wrongs we had already committed but all that we would ever commit in the future as well. God satisfied his anger against sin by pouring out all his punishment on Christ. Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 65

Feature Story Since my dad is a Christian, God did not and will not punish him. However, my dad and my family suffer the consequences of his sin. We've all experienced a lot of pain. The past few years have been tough ones as we've accepted a new memberâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;Haleyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;into our family. My mom has definitely modeled forgiveness by relying on God's grace to raise my little sister, whom we adopted. I can honestly say that I wouldn't change what happened. God has taught me so much about who he is and about trusting in him alone. My family is stronger, too. And my parents will be the first to say that their marriage is better than it ever has been.

But there are still times when wounds are reopened. During those times I'm often tempted to hold onto my anger, but then God reminds me that while I was still a sinner, Christ died for me. That says to me that I should love and forgive others as he has loved and forgiven me. 66 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

If I'm really honest with myself, I see I'm just as capable of doing the same things my dad did. That's why I needed Christ in the first place, and that's why I must depend on his grace each day. Article Shared from Ignite Your Faith Photos Credited to Shutterstock

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Soul Food Recipes for a Thanksgiving Feast By Amber Dorsey

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Thanksgiving Recipes by Lauren Prep Time: 15 minutes Cook Time: 45 minutes Ingredients (serves 8) •6 c. cubed sweet potatoes •1/4 c. coconut oil or butter •1/3 c. brown sugar, packed •1 T. molasses (optional) •1 t. cinnamon •1/4 t. ginger •1/4 t. nutmeg

Instructions  Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Bring 1/2 c. water to a boil in a large pot over mediumhigh heat.  Once the water is boiling, add in the sweet potato cubes and put the lid on. Allow the potatoes to steam for 10 minutes, or until the potatoes turn bright orange in color.  While the potatoes are steaming, bring the oil, sugar, and spices to a simmer in a skillet over medium-low heat. Whisk together over the heat just 72 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

until the sugar is dissolved and the mixture thickens.  Remove the sauce from the heat and whisk in the molasses (if using). Set aside.  Drain the potatoes and place them in a large bowl.  Pour the hot sauce over the drained potatoes. Gently mix with a spatula to coat the potatoes in sauce.  Bake in a 350 degree oven for 30-45 minutes, or until the potatoes are tender and brown.  Cool and serve.

Thanksgiving Recipes Course: Side Dish Cuisine: Southern Servings: 10 Ingredients (serves 10)  1 (8-ounce) package elbow macaroni, cooked  16 saltine crackers, finely crushed  1 teaspoon salt  1 teaspoon seasoned pepper  1 (8-ounce) block sharp Cheddar cheese, shredded  1 (8-ounce) block extra-sharp Cheddar cheese shredded  6 large eggs, lightly beaten  4 cups milk

Instructions  Preheat oven to 350 degrees.  Layer 1/3 each of macaroni, crackers, salt, pepper, and cheeses into a lightly greased 13X9-inch baking dish. Repeat layers twice.  Whisk eggs and milk together and pour over macaroni mixture.  Bake for 55 to 60 minutes, until golden brown and set. Let stand 10 minutes before serving.

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Thanksgiving Recipes Course: Gina's Best Collard Greens Cuisine: Southern Servings: 8-10 Ingredients (serves 10)  5 Bundles of Collard Greens  4 Cups of Salted Water  3 Large Smoked Ham Hocks  1 Cup of Sugar  Salt  1 Teaspoon of Crushed Red Pepper Flakes

Instructions  Thoroughly wash collard greens. Be sure to pull leaves apart and remove any sand. Chop collard greens.  In a medium saucepan, bring 4 cups of salted water to a simmer. Place smoked ham hocks in salted water and cover for about 90 minutes. Cook ham hocks until slightly tender. In the same saucepan, add remaining ingredients and collard greens.  Cover and cook greens for 1 to 1 1/2 hours. 74 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017

Thanksgiving Recipes Course: Slow Cooker Creamed Corn Cuisine: Southern Servings: 6 Ingredients (serves 6)  3 (15.25-ounces) cans whole kernel corn, drained  1 cup milk  1 tablespoon sugar  1/4 teaspoon pepper  8 ounces cream cheese, cubed  1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, cut into thin slices

Instructions  Place corn into a slow cooker. Stir in milk, sugar and pepper until well combined. Without stirring, top with butter and cream cheese. Cover and cook on high heat for 2-3 hours.  Uncover and stir until butter and cream cheese are well combined. Cover and cook on high heat for an additional 15 minutes.  Serve immediately.

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Thanksgiving Recipes Course: Cornbread Dressing Cuisine: Southern Servings: Varies Ingredients  1 batch corn bread (see my corn bread recipe)  1/2 cup (1 stick) butter  2 medium onions, diced  4 stalks celery, diced  1 1/2 teaspoons poultry seasoning  1 1/2 teaspoons dried sage leaves  2 cups chicken stock  1/2 cup heavy cream

Instructions  First prepare corn bread; set aside. Preheat oven to 350 F. In a large saucepan melt butter over medium heat. Add onion and celery; sauté until tender. Stir in poultry seasoning and sage. Crumble in corn bread and combine well. Stir in chicken stock and cream; mix well.  Pour corn bread mixture into a greased13x9x2-inch pan. Bake for 30 to 35 minutes or until golden.

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Thanksgiving Recipes Course: Sour Cream Pound Cake Cuisine: Southern Servings: Varies Ingredients 1/2 pound butter 3 cups sugar 1 cup sour cream 1/2 teaspoon baking soda 3 cups all-purpose flour 6 large eggs 1 teaspoon vanilla

Instructions 

 

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Preheat oven to 325 degrees. Prepare a 10-inch bundt or tube pan by spraying very generously with non-stick cooking spray. In a small bowl, shift together the baking soda and flour; set aside. In a large mixing bowl, cream the butter and sugar together. Add the sour cream and vanilla extract mixing until incorporated. Add the dry ingredients to the creamed mixture alternating with the eggs, beating each egg 1 at a time. Pour the mixture into the prepared pan and bake for 1 hour 20 minutes.

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Thanksgiving Recipes Course: Easy Peach Cobbler Cuisine: Southern Servings: 6-8

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Instructions Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Pour the melted butter into a 13 by 9 by 2-inch baking dish. In a medium bowl, combine the flour, 1 cup sugar, the baking powder, and the salt and mix well. Stir in the milk, mixing until just combined. Pour this batter over the butter but do not stir them together. In a small saucepan, combine the peaches, lemon juice, and remaining cup of sugar and bring to a boil over high heat, stirring constantly. Pour the peaches over the batter but do not stir them together. Sprinkle with cinnamon or nutmeg if desired. Bake in the preheated oven for 40 to 45 minutes or until the top is golden-brown. Serve warm or cold. Recipe courtesy of Dori Sanders

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Ingredients •1/2 cup unsalted butter, melted •1 cup all-purpose flour •2 cups sugar •3 teaspoons baking powder •Pinch salt •1 cup milk •4 cups peeled, pitted and thinly sliced fresh peaches (5 to 6 medium peaches) •1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice •Several dashes ground cinnamon or ground nutmeg (optional)

Just For Fun

Random Bible Facts

Unscramble to Find the Hidden Word

Answers on Page 85 Blessed Magazine October/November, 2017 79

Just For Fun Answers Answer to Random Bible Facts

Answer to Hidden Word

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