TheBluewaterFlow Spring 2013
Volume 13
John Dusseault
family rhythm There’s something about family that I just can’t get away from...oh yeah, my family! No matter how hard we may try to avoid or cling to certain members of our family, we are and will always be connected to family. God designed family to be this way. From the very beginning He created man and woman to be a foundation for spreading his fame and love throughout the world. Children would build on this foundation...or not. No family could make right what was broken from the time that Adam and Eve first sinned. No system, family or king could ultimately restore us in the way we truly need to be restored. Our sin eternally broke our perfect relationship with God. Ultimately, through the family line of Abraham, Judah and David, Jesus would be born.
So what if our earthly families point to this Heavenly family? What if the rhythm, pattern and habit of our life became a demonstration of the wonderful joy of being reconnected with God our Father?
Family Rhythm is a way of thinking about family life that promotes the message of God’s grace and truth in everyday relationship moments. As a ministry of Bluewater Baptist Church, Family Rhythm provides the opportunity to master simple principles and develop critical skills that build peace in your home and communities. All of us are a part of a family and we can all get better at the skill of living in our families. So grab your The Bible says, “To all who spouse, another did receive him, who believed in his couple, family or friend and name, he gave the right to become children begin building the Family Rhythm strategy of God” (John 1:12). Our earthly families are into your home. broken and filled with pain, but we can become part of the family of God.
inside family rhythm
1
sleep
2
3
life in canada
6
fellowship through service 7 album review
8
the final word
11
For more information about Bluewater Baptist Church please visit www.bluewaterbaptist.ca
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the wellsness report - sleep In the last edition of the Wellsness Report, we addressed the first of the big 4 areas in which we can profoundly influence our health - diet. While there is much, much more that can be said, that edition can get you well on your way. The next area that I’d like for us to explore is that of sleep. Sleep - it’s one thing we so deeply desire yet never seem to be able to get enough of. How many of us, when the clock startles us awake at 6am, have kicked ourselves proverbially for staying up too late and watching that last period of the hockey game, or that late-night talk show? Perhaps nowadays it’s more likely Facebook, Twitter, or Yahoo News that occupy our late-evening time, but all the same, most of us regret not getting to bed early enough. Our Creator designed our bodies masterfully to function according to a circadian rhythm, that is, the natural cycle of our 24 hour day. The primary factors driving the circadian rhythm are that of light, and its opposite, darkness. It wasn’t that terribly long ago that it was common for people to rise with the sun and to wind down with its setting. However, in our modern times where we have artificial light, televisions, computers, smartphones etc., the rising and setting of the sun has very little to do with most of our sleeping habits. You may have heard it said that an ideal amount of sleep is roughly 8 hours a night. Well, that seems to be true; Science bears out the conclusion that about 8 - 9 hours of sleep a night is ideal (caveat: as with most things in life there will be variation among people). The sad news is that the vasty majority of us operate somewhere below that ideal. In fact, nearly a third of adults get even less than 6 hours of sleep per 24 hour period. This departure from our designed rhythm has some significant consequences to our overall health. The negative effects and associations with getting inadequate sleep sound much like the side effects of one of those scary medications you see on TV ads from time to time: overweight and obesity, impaired immune function, type 2 diabetes, depression, anxiety, cognitive decline, systemic inflammation, increased risk of death, and others! In fact, the CDC has stated that shift work (and its effect on sleep pattern disruption) is a known carcinogen! To state the case more positively, adequate sleep enhances: memory, mental clarity, creativity, athletic performance, immune function, body composition, mood, and more.
Don’t use a computer for 2 hours before going to bed (I know this is a tough one, but artificial light, blue wavelength in particular, throws off that circadian rhythm we talked about earlier. If you simply must use your computer near bedtime, there is a program called f.lux that limits the blue spectrum of light from your screen at night) Make your room as dark as possible - use blackout shades if you can Cover up the digital read out from your alarm clock Turn off any digital device that “glows” Manage your stress during the day cortisol is released in times of stress and has a profound effect on sleep quality I realize that a few of those tips may be easier said than done, but do your best and work towards that ideal 8 hours of quality sleep a night. As I’m sure you know, a good night’s rest can work wonders. After all, that’s how God designed us!
The science behind each of these phenomena associated with inadequate sleep is quite detailed in some cases, and in other cases not understood very well at all. Getting into the detailed science of sleep is beyond the scope of this article, but for those who want to “geek out”, I’ll throw you a bone: many of the negative effects of inadequate sleep concerning overweight, obesity, diabetes, and systemic inflammation, involve the dis-regulation of the hormones cortisol, and HGH (human growth hormone). So, now that we know that too little sleep is significantly bad for us, and that the right amount of sleep is very beneficial, how do we go about ensuring that the quantity and quality of our sleep is adequate? Here are some tips for maximizing your chance for a good night’s sleep: Go to bed earlier - there is some truth to the saying that “an hour before midnight is worth two hours after”
2 ● Spring 2013 www.bluewaterbaptist.ca ● @BluewaterSarnia ● www.facebook.com/bluewaterbaptist ●
instagram Parents : A Word about Instagram There is so much information out there about internet safety and you should definitely read up on that, but internet safety isn’t exactly what I want to talk about. Over the past several months, I've been noticing some interesting stuff on Instagram from your students that I want to share with you. "Hey, weirdo, why are you following my kids on Instagram?" Good question, and I'll get to that. I am 26 years old, which is not just a fun fact, but important in the history of social media. MySpace started during my high school years, and Facebook started the year I went to college (when it was still just a site just for college students). So while my generation didn't grow up with it, we were the first to use it. We're bilingual, in a sense. Your kids, on the other hand, don't know a life without it and you're doing your best to learn and keep up with it. So would you mind too terribly much if I acted as a bridge for a second? Give you some thinking material? Let me back up. Almost a year ago now, myself and our fantastic SPLAT leaders were talking with some of our Jr. High students (some of the best grade 6,7&8 students out there!) about identity. The topic was "Finding your identity in Christ". I would have much rather talked to them about sex or drugs or something, because those are pretty concrete topics. We'd stand up and say, "Don't do it." End of talk. It would be so moving we'd be asked back to speak at every event, naturally.
Instead, we were tasked with talking about something that a lot of adults I know don't even know how to apply in their own lives.
I love the app. It's a lot of fun, but there are some components to it that I'm not sure we've thought all the way through.
What is identity? And how do you talk to a group of middle school girls about finding their identity in an invisible God? And if they aren't finding their identity in Him, where are they finding it?
Think back to when you were in junior high. How did you know you were "cool"? A popular girl probably wrote you a note and put it in your locker or asked you to sit with her at lunch, right? There were a few eyewitnesses and it was pure joy.
After much thought and prayer, we decided to talk about something we know: social media. We talked about Instagram specifically, since a lot of these girls aren't on Facebook yet and think Twitter is stupid. I'm sure you're aware of Instagram if your kids are on it, but if not, here's a rundown of what it is: 1. Your student gets an account and starts following other users. 2. In return, other users follow your child. 3. Your child posts a picture to his or her account. 4. Other users comment or "like" the picture. 5. Repeat. 87 times a day.
Do you remember back-to-school shopping? You bought the trendiest new shirts and shoes. But how did you know if your new shirt was cute? Someone told you, probably. How did you know if your new shirt was hideous? Again, someone probably told you. Or made fun of you, but luckily it was just between you and that person. Or - worst case scenario between you and that person and their posse. Still, not life altering. That was then. This is now: Your middle schooler buys a new shirt and what's the first thing she does? Takes a selfie (self-portrait, for those out of the loop) and posts it on Instagram.
An example: left is my Instagram profile; right is the photo feed of all posted pictures
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Think I'm joking? A quick search of Instagram shows us... oh, look! - this was posted 18 minutes ago:
Ok, so not a big deal, this is how the world is. Your kids feel the need to share every single decision they ever make with the world at large. It's just "kids these days". It's true. It is "kids these days". But does the feedback they receive on Instagram impact them? Do you think they base their identity in it? What happens when your daughter's new shirt picture didn't get as many "likes" or comments as the picture her friend posted of her new shirt? Do you think she even cares about that stuff? Yea, I'd say so. Your sons do, too:
T h i s g u y s p e c i fi c a l l y a s k s f o r comments AND a certain number of likes. 40, to be exact.
And if you think they don't actually pay attention to this stuff, read the hashtags on photos below:
[Side note: don't forget to read what your kids post in the hashtags of their photos. (That's the # sign with a bunch of words crammed after it, like #40likesplease.) They use it as an aside comment, which, parents, is just as important to pay attention to as the photo caption.] We're no longer in world of handwritten "circle yes or no" notes between two people; your kids are living social lives on a completely public forum. This is not new information. But, taking it a step further: have you considered that your child is given numerical values on which to base his or her social standing? For the first time ever your children can determine their "worth" using actual numbers provided by their peers! Let me explain... Your daughter has 139 followers which is 23 less than Jessica, but 56 more than Beau. Your son's photo had 38 likes which was 14 less than Travis' photo, but 22 more than Spencer's. See what I mean? There's a number attached to them. A ranking.
Do you see what's happening? #3newfollowers, #77likes # i # a m # s o # p o p u l a r , #morefollowersplease They're definitely paying attention. And it's definitely affecting them. It's not just about assumed popularity anymore. It's explicit. It's quantifiable. At arguably the most awkward time in their lives, a crucial time of development when they are trying to figure out who they are and where they belong, this is what they're up against. A quantifiable popularity ranking. So, back to the lesson we were supposed to teach. I started thinking
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about everything I've mentioned above and thought, "Maybe our girls are different. Maybe their faith buffers them from being caught up as deeply in this as their friends." Wrong. In talking to our girls, I was blown away by their responses: They know exactly - to the digit - how many followers they have (and who they follow that isn't following them back). They get their feelings hurt when the popular kids "like" the pictures above and below theirs on the Instagram newsfeed, but not their picture. They delete pictures of themselves when they don't get as many likes as they were hoping for. They don't get invited to parties, but see all the fun they missed out on in every photo posted from it. They post ugly pictures of their friends to get revenge for some heinous act they committed (like saying Louis is their favorite One Direction member).
here for good, in some form or fashion.) Remember: social media can be SO FUN. (I know you love you some Pinterest, girl.) Plus, not all kids are the same. Some place an unhealthy amount of self worth in their social media accounts, some could care less about it.
I have no idea. I can tell you what we talked about with our 8th grade friends: We talked about posting photos of things other than themselves, to avoid setting themselves up for insecurity about their appearance. We talked about g u a rd i n g t h e i r h e a r t s w i t h scriptures from God's Word and reminding themselves whose they were. We talked about inner beauty and encouraging their friends' strengths and...a whole host of other stuff.
Whoa. Before we all freak out and delete Instagram and all other social apps, may I just say (with approximately zero authority or expertise on the subject): This is no cause for mass hysteria. My intent is not to scare you away from these sites, because I don't think the solution is to write them off entirely. This is a part of your kids' communication that is here to stay. (I don't just mean Instagram - it could die tomorrow. But social media? It's
How do you regulate activity on these sites while keeping it fun for your kids? How do you talk to them about the numbers (likes, comments, followers) provided by their peers not being an accurate representation of their value and worth? How do you teach them to base their identity solely in Christ - to be confident daughters and sons of the King?
Regardless, it's important to think about no matter where your children fall on the spectrum. My intent is to dig a little deeper into the impact these sites can have on your kids. To start thinking about how to safeguard children’s hearts and minds against what appears to a 12 year old to be concrete numerical evidence about their value and popularity.
What we said isn't really important. What's important is where you come in, parents. You know your kids and you know the insecurities they face. I hope this information is helpful for you, or at least gets you thinking. I love your kids so, so much and I want them to know just how special and wonderful and unique they are. I don't want a stupid thing like followers and likes to tell them any differently. taylorandsarahbrooks.blogspot.ca/ 2013/04/parents-word-aboutinstagram.html
Hamilton October 4-5 www.actlikemen.com
Lecrae
Matt Chandler
James MacDonald
Mark Driscoll
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life in canada Bluewater launched a program called "Life in Canada" early in the year. The program was geared toward international students at Lambton College and was designed to help them with their conversational skills, to provide information on career pursuits in Canada, to assist them with their adjustment to Canadian culture and to build friendships between the students themselves as well as between Canadians and internationals. We met for four sessions and had a wonderful time getting to know the four young men who attended. The students were all from India and were extremely enthusiastic and eager to learn. We had so much fun together and, even though we met for such a short period of time, it was very rewarding and enjoyable. The teachers learned just as much as the students! Much of the program's success must be attributed to the gracious involvement of many of our church members. We had guest speakers come for the Careers session and share their expertise with our students in order to help them with their career plans. For nearly two hours we sat at those tables enjoying a lively back and forth conversation between students and professionals. One week we talked about Foods and Karen Kuykendaal generously invited us into the kitchen and taught a cooking class - custom made for vegetarians! We were
able to send home the extra vegetarian chili with the guys at the end of class. Fred Pentz was kind enough to come for our last session and share his knowledge of vehicle insurance with the students, who had specifically asked for information on this topic. And I can't go without mentioning our good friend, Srini, who faithfully attended every week in order to help us teach the class. He was so helpful and informative and was a great benefit to our program, as he often bridged that language gap between the Canadian teachers and international students!
Overall, I would say this program was a great success perhaps not in numbers, but in the value of the relationships that were built and in the assistance that was provided to the students. So a HUGE thank you to everyone who helped – Steph and John Hollingsworth, Linda Konrad, Jon Bennett and Kim DuChene!
Kingdom Rock our annual Kids Kamp will be the third week of July (July 15-19)! This week is packed full of great memories. This year's theme is "Where kids stand strong for God.”
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fellowship through service How many times have we heard Pastor Doug say during the Sunday announcements, “Lots of things going on this week”, and you know about only two or three things. That’s often the way it is in a busy church. I don’t know what all goes on during the week, but I know that a lot happens behind the scenes that makes a difference for Jesus’ kingdom. I’d like to make you aware of some recent Christian service activities where Bluewater folks have been involved. The ones I will mention involved mostly men but sometimes ladies have contributed and sometimes it was the Bluewater women who initiated the project. It always amazes me how God brings just the right people with the right skills at the right time! Let me expand! Some of our great ideas are hatched over Wednesday morning coffee hour at Timmie’s on London Line (by the way, there’s an open invitation to this event). One idea that started as a thought but quickly developed into a full blown project was cleanup of the annex. Once the decision to take this on was made, all the guys quickly offered trucks, trailers, safety equipment. It was an interesting sight….sort of like a crime scene….with guys dressed in white coveralls, boots, masks. Since many of the guys doing this project were retirees, it was a pretty exciting day for us. The annex was basically gutted and cleaned out and a garage door was installed at the west end. It is now available for safe storage of the garden tractor and other gardening equipment and has one end reserved for furniture being collected for the ladies’ Welcome Home ministry. Daphne approached us about help with the community garden. The gardeners (or wannabes) came out of the woodwork with rototillers, hoes, shovels. The garden was planned and planted and it’s been exciting to see the harvest that has resulted. You’ve likely seen the baskets of tomatoes available at the back of the church on several Sundays last Fall. A few handymen have put together a “prayer box” which will be placed in the garden and used to minister to needs in the community. Being involved in service at the Women’s Interval Home has opened up all sorts of opportunities. The ladies really
got involved here with helping set up an apartment and of course, our list of “strong backs” was tapped into for moving furniture. Another recent project here has been cleanup of the yard at the Home, so the children can safely play. One of the bigger challenges in this project was the “battle of the mulberry stump” ……3 men over 2 days battled with this stump and in the end, the stump finally succumbed and the men felt like warriors from another age. Another huge challenge was the jungle of English ivy that took most of the volunteers working together with great determination to conquer. Together we’ve replaced a steel door and repaired a deck, some stairs, a dish washer and a chimney, and someone always seems to turn up with the skills needed to make it happen. Recently the men took on a project to rebuild the deck belonging to the parents of a man on our Worship Team. Practically the whole Worship Team was there, and we more senior observers concluded that the future next phase of the church building would be in good hands. Besides group projects we appreciate the dedication of many individuals who serve behind the scenes. There are lists of people who have offered to help out with occasional rides to doctors’ appointments and weekly rides to church, and many other opportunities for service! Requests come in through the community organisation Neighbourlink, through Bluewater’s own God’s Resources program and often from other ministries in the church where needs are identified. Does this sound exciting? Do you feel strangely drawn to be a part of this? Connect with Daphne (383-3176) or Rudy (542-0425). No professional qualifications needed, just willing hands and hearts!
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album review: citizens
Over the years, Mars Hill Music has slowly been adding more and more bands to their bill. This Spring marks the release of Mars Hill's Citizens first full length self titled album. With 11 incredibly simple, yet beautifully written worship tunes, this album is a hit with me and is sure to be a hit among many others as well! To give a little background on Citizens, the band is fronted by worship leader Zach Bolen. Bolen leads worship at one of the Seattle U-District campuses of Mars Hill Church. Mars Hill Music partnered with BEC Recordings, (which also distributes the music of Hillsong United, Bebo Norman and Kutless) and they have managed to put out this high-energy indie rock album which is sure to make its way into the worship services of many churches! The album itself hearkens to the type of rock sound that we notice in bands like Switchfoot, but also brings in electronic indie sounds a la Hillsong United. One thing that this band does that allows them to stick out, is their ability to take classic hymns and recreate them to better suit a contemporary day and age. Pulling a few songs from their E.P Already/Not Yet, such as their rendition of "Amazing Grace", adding a couple more re-worked
hymns like "Praise to the Lord", "In Tenderness", and "I Surrender All", and lastly, a few of their self written tunes...this band has been able to draw people in with not only their creativity and musical talent, but more importantly the theology behind each song. For example, the CD opens with a song titled "Made Alive" in which a clear message allows us to reflect on our depravity but celebrate in the glory of Christ. The lyrics of the chorus You have bought me back with the riches of your amazing grace and relentless love. I'm made alive forever, with you life forever, by your grace I'm saved. Songs like "Sing of My Youth" gives us this theme of God’s redemption of our sin but in a more contemplative way – by being reminded of the gospel. As mentioned above, for those of you who are in love with hymns check out these songs! The band manages to make the song their own by updating the instrumentation, but also manages to keep aspects of the original song by maintaining the melody. Although this may sound like a simple task to do, reworking hymns has been attempted many times before. But before this album I have yet to witness someone who can accomplish it to this degree of excellence that gives you the desire to want to sing out the top of your lungs no matter where you are! The album closes out with a song titled "Oh God." This song, like many of the others, is incredibly simple. In regards to instruments and vocals, there isn’t much going on – just two voices and a guitar for the majority of the song. Regardless, it takes your breath away. The song beings with a mysterious kind of tone but is not slow to transition to themes of hope, joy, and celebration! It reminds us that even in the tough times, God never leaves our side, that nothing can pull us apart from our King! Citizens’ self titled album is geared towards the Christian who wants to be able to sing gospel-centred lyrics but not have to sacrifice the art and creativity of music. This stuff can work for private times of prayer, high energy worship nights, or even for your Sunday morning service! I know that one thing I struggle with when listening to Christian artists is feeling like I keep coming across the same lyrics, the same feel, and the same sound with each song, regardless of how "new" or "fresh" it is. If you want something to shake things up a little bit, if you're looking for a change, this album is for you!
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the final word – how to camp with boys Last weekend my 10 year old son had a "Boys' Extreme You may not remove the burning end from the fire to wave it Team" camp out that we both attended. The following is in front of your friend's face, even if he did it first before he an accurate description of our itinerary: stole your seat. 6pm- Arrival. Dads and their boys scramble for a bunk in Do not run anywhere with a burning stick. Even to the one of the many cabins to avoid sleeping on the floor. bathroom. 6:15- Most dads now realize that unless they took the afternoon off and got to camp two hours earlier, they are sleeping on the floor somewhere. Sons have picked up the "I Told You So" look from their mothers.
9:00- In a very timely move, one of the dads announces that it is time to start "Carving Wood". All of the boys grab the non-burning ends of their sticks and start hacking feverishly away.
6:30- Even though we all ate at home, the cook fires up 11:00- Still burning and hacking the same sticks. the grill for hotdogs, which don't count as food anyway. At Midnight- Dads announce that it is time for bed. The fire is the same time, two other dads set out to start a bonfire. doused and everyone heads for the sleeping bags. To avoid 7:00- Every kid in camp and most of the other dads are a lineup for the bathroom, boys are reminded that "the world now surrounding the two 'firemen' to offer words of is your toilet". encouragement, such as: "You really suck at this." and "I have a can of gasoline in the truck..." One boy states his 12:30- Lights out. As soon as darkness settles across the belief that dropping a grenade on the wood is really all we camp, the air fills with fart sounds and stifled giggles. need to do. Discussion ensues on how that wouldn't help 2:30- Most of the giggling has stopped. at all, depending of course on what TYPE of grenade was used and how quickly one would have to pick up the 6:00- Dads wake up to the sounds of more farting and more smouldering pieces after the explosion. giggling. Time to start the bonfire again. 7:30- The fire has been started and all males are sitting 8:00- Breakfast followed by more carving by the fire. around it as they fill their faces with hotdog. 10:00- Time for a 43 mile hike. 8:00- Interest has gone from "Eating" to "Finding A Long Noon- Time for lunch. Boys begin to doze into their chili. Stick And Poking The Fire" The following rules ensue: More fart sounds, this time the boys aren't the culprits.... You may find a stick and place one end in the fire. 2:00- Time to leave. There is a mad rush to the bonfire to If you get up to leave and find a stick you can't save your find "the stick", then a strained discussion in the parking lot seat, even if you have been sitting there since yesterday. over how to store an object that is needle sharp on one end and still smoking on the other. Setting fire to the end of your stick is okay. My Wife: "It doesn't sound like you did much at all this That end stays in the fire. weekend. I hope Ben isn't upset..." You may not, under any circumstances, remove the Ben (bursting into the room): "DAD! Thanks for the best burning end from the fire, even if it is to show your dad, weekend EVER! Fire! Knives! Camping! You're the best dad!" who is not paying attention. Me: "No problem son! It was a lot of work to organise but You may not remove the burning end from the fire to wave you are worth it!" it around and pretend it is a light sabre.
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caption contest Provide your best caption for this picture. Email responses to theflow@bluewaterbaptist.ca or use the QR:
from last issue: “New promotional ad results in drastic drop to airline ticket sales.” - Tess
Comments? Would you like to contribute to future issues of theFlow? We’re looking for contributions and pictures! Email theflow@bluewaterbaptist.ca Thanks to Steve, Tim, Beth, Daph, Rudy, Ryan, John and everyone else who contributed to this issue of theFlow!
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