26 minute read
Finding Your Way
Finding Your Way Helpful hints for your leadership career path
By Kristen Main
Working toward your career goals can sometimes be a daunting task. It can feel like you are in a forest of trees with multiple paths without the ability to see if it is a dead end. You try to choose wisely and follow the signs, but you still end up lost and frustrated.
Having a guide to show you the way or explain where each path may take you is valuable. You do not have to travel the road alone. There are others who have gone before you, and can share their experience and knowledge to help you. At the end of the day, the decision to walk right, left or straight ahead is yours to own. Leaning on others to gain confidence in your decisions will enable you to move forward.
I have 15 years of experience moving from a frontline role into leadership in Corporate America. I would like to share some of my journey and what has helped me achieve success in my path.
A career path is not always up and forward, it may be a side-step to gain experience and exposure. There is a misconception that career paths are straight. Many describe it as “climbing the corporate ladder.” You do not have to make any decisions about where you are going when you are on a ladder—it is either up or down. Since lateral moves are not feasible on a ladder, this narrowly focused journey can cause you to miss what is to the right or left. I will never forget what Facebook executive Sheryl Sandberg said during a webcast I attended. Sandberg, author of the bestselling book “Lean In,” compared trying did her career path to a jungle gym, where sometimes you may reach the bar above you to go up, and sometimes you move left to right.
It is unpredictable, exciting and unique to you since you get to decide where to go next. There is nothing wrong with a lateral move. It may open an upward climb that you could not see from your previous vantage point. Sandberg’s simple concept had a significant impact on me personally. I was always looking straight up and did not see value in a lateral move. I became frustrated when upward mobility was not happening or opportunities did not exist. It was not until I started to look laterally that I identified valuable next steps in my career.
While it was scary since it was not as clear where I would go next, it enabled me to learn new skills and work with different people. This experience was pivotal in the most significant career shift I encountered from leadership in the business to leadership in IT.
Take calculated risks that challenge you and help you grow in your career If I am being honest, risk taking is not easy for me. I am naturally risk averse. I have worked in the insurance industry for years—a market where this personality trait aligns very well.
Early in my career, I did not have the confidence or see the value in pursuing career opportunities that were not 100% aligned to my skill set. That all changed when my company went through a “Lean” transformation. It was uncomfortable being a manager at the time and feeling like a new hire. I had to learn new ways to do my work and how to use the system we were implementing. It was the most difficult and rewarding experience I have had in my career, changing the path I was on tremendously.
I realized I had strong problem-solving capabilities that I was not only able to use for what I was facing, but to help coach and train others, too. I recognized I was not as strong in the analytical aspect, so I went back to school to earn an MBA with a concentration in Six Sigma. I did not need this degree for a specific role or career move; I needed it for my own growth and confidence. In fact, I will never forget a colleague’s response when I told him. “Well that is similar to an engineering degree,” he said with a surprised and skeptical tone in his voice. At first, I had butterflies. His doubt nearly shook me. I ended up graduating
with a 4.0 and I am now in a higher-level position than he is. There will always be people around you who support you and believe in you, and those who doubt your decisions. Find your internal voice and confidence, and know that you can learn new things and achieve success when faced with a challenge. Going after a sure thing will deliver some satisfaction when you are successful. But trying something out of your comfort zone will bring you the greatest feeling of satisfaction, especially when you conquer it and achieve success.
Building relationships is essential to your career I currently work remote. I am not in the same office as the team I work with. Sometimes I go to a local office several times a week, even though technically I could work from home. I used to be a manager in the department, where I was able to see familiar faces daily. It is critically important for me to stay connected to people in the company and maintain relationships. Not only does this help me down the road, it also brings an element to my job that I find motivating and inspiring.
Early in my career, I had a manager I worked closely with on a special project. When the project ended, I took a promotion and moved across the country into a new role. I occasionally tried to keep in touch with that manager by offering to help when he had a question that involved my department. We both moved into different roles. Six years later, he had an opening on his team I was very interested in. I ended up working for him for a couple of years. I believe that by helping him when it was not required kept my name relevant to him. It ended up positively impacting my chance at earning a spot on his team.
Over the years, I have also helped others around me find opportunities for a career move based on connections I have. I encourage you to find a company that has a culture of teamwork and collaboration where people help each other and value relationships.
So how do you get into leadership? Sometimes there is an opinion that only managers are leaders and that you must achieve a certain level within a hierarchy to be a leader. I believe leadership is needed at all levels within an organization and should be demonstrated regardless of your title or position. You should try to motivate and inspire others. Remember: We are all in this together. Set an example of high performance and exceptional work ethic and try to help others work at that same level. Make yourself available to help others and ensure that you are someone they look up to and respect. This attitude and effort will not go unnoticed and will bring job satisfaction beyond just achieving your own results. Management positions can feel like thankless jobs, but you are trying to get work done through others by coaching and developing them. to take the plunge. Family can be a great source of encouragement, but they can be bias. Having work friends in your corner is very important.
I made a life-changing decision to post for a position that resulted in my family moving across the country. I remember sitting at my desk staring at the application, struggling to decide if I should post. My husband supported me 100%, but the doubt I felt was more about my ability to do the job successfully.
Suddenly, my phone rang. It was a manager I had worked with briefly in the company. I did not know what to expect when I answered. After she asked me about the posting, I shared my thoughts. She encouraged me to go for it. That two-minute phone call was all I needed to nudge me forward. That simple gesture had a significant impact on my career. We do not always know what someone
Sometimes, they will be successful and sometimes they will not. Try different things and find what works for each person. Be willing to identify when you might need to do something new. The best leaders are humble and willing to take advice from others and demonstrate agility in how they approach things.
Find your cheering section We talked about relationships, but this is different. Your cheering section looks out for and supports you through the good and bad. I have three women on my team who are my cheering section. They send me postings of jobs they think I would be excel at and encourage me to take risks when I am feeling self-doubt. I do the same for them.
We all have had situations where we need someone to give us a nudge needs or what they are thinking, so we should reach out and encourage others and be their “cheerleaders.” Over the years, I have achieved exceptional results, and received many awards and accolades. But what I am most proud of are the people I have been able to help move forward in their careers. I was recently brought to tears by a former employee who told a group that I was her hero. They looked at her strangely since I am not famous. She went on to tell them how I had helped her find success and that she would not be where she was without me. It was by far the best compliment I have ever received and I will cherish that forever. Who have you helped recently?
All for one Why WBDC is the resource today’s women entrepreneurs can count on
The Women’s Business Development Center (WBDC) is a nationally recognized nonprofit leader in the field of women’s economic development. Originally founded in 1986 to provide programs and services to support and accelerate women’s business ownership, WBDC has since grown to serve all underrepresented business owners.
The organization aims to drive business diversity and fuel innovation to increase the economic impact of startups, emerging and established business owners. WBDC and its dedicated team members empower entrepreneurs to succeed through business advising and coaching, certification and procurement opportunities, financial education and capital assistance. The WBDC serves a nine-state Midwest region with headquarters in Chicago and offices in Minneapolis, Kansas City, St. Louis, and Milwaukee. Within this region, WBDC is a partner for the Women’s Business Enterprise National Council (WBENC), the country’s largest third-party certifier of women-owned businesses. They are responsible for certifying Women Business Enterprises (WBEs), a powerful tool that has helped thousands of women entrepreneurs compete for contracts with the government and major corporations.
WBDC offers tailor-made programs to help business owners chart their path to success. These programs help business owners actualize their innovative potential to better serve their customers, increase their impact on their communities and achieve their business goals. Large-scale innovation across industries and micro-level innovation within companies is essential for business growth. Ignite: Women’s Innovation Network is a space for women-owned companies to partner with corporations and other business owners to innovate and improve supplier diversity ecosystems. Top Shelf: High Volume Retail Growth Insights Program helps retail business owners expand their market to national retailers. Plan for Profit helps business owners create a profitable business plan.
Since its inception, WBDC has served more than 85,000 women, held over 13,000 entrepreneurial training workshops, secured $82 million-plus in financing, and facilitated in excess of $1 billion in government and corporate contracts. WBDC also certifies approximately 1,900 Women Business Enterprises (WBEs) annually.
WBDC’s success is owed to a very dedicated team of business leaders, including women’s advocate and current president and CEO Emilia DiMenco. Her career began at BMO Harris N.A., where she spent 30 years in corporate banking before joining the WBDC.
DiMenco rose through the ranks at BMO Harris, eventually being elevated to executive VP in the corporate and commercial bank. She also led BMO Harris’ Women in Business Initiative, which made the bank the choice for many women business owners.
During her time at BMO Harris, DiMenco also served on WBDC’s Board of Directors. She then refocused her career and joined the WBDC as COO to work under its original co-presidents, before transitioning to president and CEO in 2013.
Since DiMenco’s arrival, WBDC has dramatically expanded its direct lending program, which now offers a pool of more than $3.3 million.
DiMenco is proud to advance the mission of WBDC as an advocate for women and other underrepresented business owners. But she credits her trusted team for WBDC’s ongoing innovation and success. The WBDC team consists of a group of experts who specialize in a variety of business categories and can advise business owners in any industry at any stage. The entire team embodies WBDC’s mission, and together are leveling the playing field for women and minority business owners.
Through the years, WBDC has a built a long list of success stories and entrepreneurs that have benefited from their services. One such client is Kimberly Meek, owner and CEO of Hacha Products Corporation. A certified Women and Minority Business Enterprise, Hacha is the only lab solely dedicated to testing and treating water for PFAS—pollutants that have been linked to cancer, high cholesterol and other medical condition.
With help from WBDC’s Ignite: Women’s Innovation Network, Meek and her team began partnerships with world-class research institutions and best-in-class industry leaders like Agilent Technologies to scale their technology. Hacha now has a dedicated private laboratory in Chicago where their team can prepare, test, and analyze samples collected by field technicians.
Through the innovative partnerships established by WBDC, Hacha is addressing this large-scale issue with reduced testing times while informing policy, infrastructure, and treatment planning for future protection of our water and our communities.
Another example is Jana Farmer of Ms Jana’s Candy, who turned her avocation into a full-fledged business in 2018 at age 67. What started as a hobby of making homemade treats
Emilia Dimenco
soon turned into a booming business. WBDC was able to guide her through what came next. By connecting with WBDC, “Ms Jana” gathered tools to grow her business. In fact, she recently secured her first loan from CIBC bank, and was approved within two weeks with guidance from WBDC, helping her financially grow her business. She was also certified as a WBE in 2020.
Sue Tierno and her sister Kathleen Wood, co-owners and founders of Suzy’s Swirl, a frozen dessert company, are expanding their business thanks to the WBDC’s Top Shelf program. Following their success with frozen yogurt and sorbet, their next venture led them to the WBDC, where its team of experts guided them through the process of working with big name retailers to sell their new Suzy Swirl Spiked pints, an alcohol-infused frozen yogurt.
As a result, Tierno and her business partners are in the process of arranging deals with several national retailers to sell Suzy’s Swirl Spiked Pints on their shelves.
For years, WBDC has served as a resource for women and minority entrepreneurs and business owners like this. As the business landscape continues to evolve, WBDC is committed to evolving its services to best support their partners and clients. The organization will adapt existing programs and fill any gaps in the business landscape necessary to help businesses flourish.
For more information or to connect with one of WBDC’s experts, visit www.wbdc.org.
Embracing your ‘enoughness’
By Cat LaCohie
5 ways burlesque can positively impact every area of your life
If you are looking to improve your confidence and charisma—from the bedroom, to the boardroom and everywhere in between—look no further. Burlesque is more than just flirtatious tease—it is an attitude of confidence that can positively impact every area of life. Here are five ways to show you the way:
1. Enhancing your "enoughness" Working on your “enoughness” in the world of burlesque trains this muscle for your everyday life. There are several things my new Burlesque students worry about when they first come to me, but usually it boils down to two main points: 1. Body image 2. Self-doubt in their ability
What I love about creating solo acts with my students is that “it’s all about pleasing you.” I am not teaching group choreography where everyone compares themselves to everyone else. We create a solo act to celebrate you in whichever way you see fit.
› What do you want to express? › What fires you up? › You make the rules to suit your needs and your strengths.
Burlesque is about embracing your uniqueness, in life and onstage. For anyone who experiences self-doubt throughout the day—“I don’t belong here,” “I’m not good enough”—I would advise them to follow up that question with, “by whose standards?”
By whose standards are you feeling that your body has flaws? Who says you should not proudly show off these areas of your body just because they have not been air brushed by photoshop? By whose standards are you judging your performance abilities? Your intelligence? Your achievements? Is the voice of judgment in your head created by a parent, a co-worker, a sibling, a supposed friend? (Hint: Stop hanging out with these people wherever possible.)
I advise all my students to avoid the mentality of going on stage asking the audience, “Is this doing it for you? Is this sexy? Do you like what I’m doing?”
It is not about asking the audience if you are good enough and if you are meeting their standards., it is about saying, “Look at me, I am awesome. Witness me in my height of glory.”
Once you give yourself permission to do this on stage, you will find yourself instinctively walking into all rooms with the same confident attitude.
2. Remove any stigma about flaunting your sexuality People feel guilty for wanting to look and feel sexy, especially in the world of business, which can be so masculine orientated. Too often, we shy away from embracing our feminine power and sexuality in order to be “taken seriously” (FTS!).
Newcomers to burlesque may worry about what everyone else thinks of them. “Are my parents going to think less of me?” “What if my co-workers find out?” Again, these doubts are related to other people’s standards. Remember, when people judge us or prevent us from doing something, it is because it causes fear in them. Your action highlights their inaction, their inability to do the very thing you have the confidence to do.
Burlesque is too often misinterpreted by those who have never experienced it. It is not solely about stripping
and revealing flesh, in the voyeuristic sense. Your act is about a peeling and revealing of layers and concepts. Rather than saying, "I’m naked and vulnerable,” you are actually rebelliously and joyously saying, ‘“I’m ripping off this mask that society has made me wear.” You are not doing this for anyone else. You are not taking your clothes off to titillate "some guy." You are celebrating yourself, peeling back the layers you are wearing in order to celebrate the beautiful human underneath.
3. Find your political voice Yes, you can use your burlesque stage as a public soapbox. If you feel you cannot voice your opinion at the dinner table or water cooler, whether that is because other people shun your opinion or you do not articulate enough to join the conversation, try Burlesque.
Be political. You are making art. And for what other reason do people create art than to say something to the world? That is the essence of Burlesque. It is therapeutic and cathartic for the performer, and the audience gets something out of it, too.
4. Re-invent yourself (it is never too late) You never have to settle for the “you” that you are now. Just because you grew up a certain way, with specific experiences, does not mean you must keep that identity for the rest of your life. If you are stuck with something you do not like, change it. Large or small, you can move, quit your job, break up with somebody, or just color your hair. Some changes may take longer than others, but it is better to slowly crawl in the direction you want, than to sprint the other way. With this in mind, a huge life change and self-reinvention may seem overly daunting, so start with the Burlesque stage. Allow this to be your arena for a new persona.
Embrace your brazen alter-ego. Give it a name. Let it take the blame for your newfound style and behavioral choices. Allow it the freedom to not “fit in” or
meet somebody else’s expectations of you. You can gradually allow your new persona to filter into your everyday life and realize that the people who matter will fall in love with the quirkiness and weirdness that truly is you.
5. Draw attention to your “flaws” and make them your USP (unique selling point) Rather than hide the areas you have been made to feel bad about in your everyday life, your burlesque act is the perfect opportunity to draw attention to (and celebrate) those qualities. Maybe these qualities are not accepted or celebrated in the work environment or around your family, but those rules and regulations do not exist when your burlesque persona hits the stage.
In the burlesque world, these qualities are no longer tainted as negative flaws, they are just a quality that makes you different from the person standing next to you. These qualities are what make you uniquely you—and you can start to embrace them as your USP.
As you gradually get used to confidently flaunting those areas, you will see it filter into your everyday life. The more confidence you have in every element that is you, the more you can start to surround yourself with those who value you for the person you truly are, rather than feeling the need to change for others.
For anyone craving more tips on self-confidence and celebrating yourself, both on and off the stage, check out my intro to burlesque class, “Unleash Your Inner Vixen,” with me in Los Angeles. For more information, visit www.vixendeville. com/classes/introductory-workshop/. If you are outside the LA area, you can sign up for a free consultation with me online at www.vixendeville.com/ consultation-questionnaire.
Cat will be exhibiting at The Best You Expo at the LA Convention Centre, March 20-21. Check out her seminar, “Revealing The True You — No Apology Needed!” in the Empowering Women room, March 21, 11:30 a.m., and join her in the Inspiration Zone, March 21, 2:30 p.m., for the interactive session, “Walking on Broken Glass… and Other SelfDiscoveries.” For more information, visit https://thebestyouexpo.com/us/ speaker/cat-lacohie/
The Secret to a Passionate, Purposeful Life
Just as the subtle morning sun casts its first rays into the canyon, I hit “send” on the final edits to my book editor. My living room is wall-less, and from the three acres of untamed jungle land I steward with my life-partner, Manex, comes a cacophony of squawking, squeaking, chirping, clicking and howling. This is the place I chose as sanctuary for healing and self-realization, and now seekers on the precipice personal change, comes to the Nicoya Peninsula, our little piece of paradise on Costa Rica’s pacific coast. It is no coincidence that the walls between me and the natural world have dissolved, just like the barrier between my dreams and reality.
From where I sit, it all feels orchestrated by some divine design, but of course it did not always feel like that. A decade ago, everything I had spent years diligently achieving had been unapologetically desecrated like an unsuspecting Midwestern town at the hands of a violent twister.
Just shy of 30, I had attained a successful life that looked really good on paper. I was continually ranking No. 1 nationally at a top Fortune 100 company and living in a beachfront penthouse with my internet tycoon boyfriend, jetting off to extravagant vacations. The only problem was, when I got really real with myself, which was not too frequently back then, I knew that something big was missing. I just had no idea what it was or how to go about finding it. Adrenaline-pumping activities served as brief refuge from this pervasive apathy, and shiny things momentarily brought me to life. High falutin’ parties and friendship drama were temporary distractions from a deep-seated sadness churning inside of me. In my limited scope of consciousness, I blamed the man I was with. Obviously, he was not doing enough for me—for us.
What I had yet to discover was that the spirit is always working on our behalf, guiding us into situations so we can wake up to our truth and power. And spirit guided me into the most devastating creation of my life, where I was stripped of everything I valued. It was then, when the boy broke my heart, I lost my luxe lifestyle, and my friends cut their ties with me, that my quest By Emily Pereira
inward began. Much to my surprise, what felt like the most painful breakdown of my life, gave way to the most pivotal breakthrough I could ever imagine.
It was then that the forces of the universe converged to connect me with powerful spiritual teachers, and I saw the greatest source of my pain was not from losing this man or this so-called perfect life; it was from unconsciously following a script I did not write.
I had soaked up messages from the fabric of what was around me, and internalized these messages as my own. My narrow script left little room for creative risks, because taking chances might expose me as not being the image of perfection I had gotten used to portraying. This script urged me to find the most successful alpha-male in the room, and bask in his glow, so I would feel worthy and safe. Now mind you, I had no idea I was doing any of this. The most devious thing about my script was that it had me believing it did not exist at all.
The first rule of the script is that there is no script.
After my breakthrough, I pulled back the layers of illusion I had carefully constructed around me and got real with myself. I recognized that I had created a life based on external validation and in doing so, became an unwell, uninspired and unhappy woman. I wanted to be a woman who strode confidently in the direction of her dreams, but I could not identify anything I had a burning passion to do. When a teacher urged me to explore my creative side, I was like, “Um, what creative side?”
For 32 years, I had always assumed creativity was a genetic thing and that gene had unceremoniously passed me by. I soon learned that “blah” feeling I could not shake was merely fear of failure masquerading as apathy. My script had me believing that unless I was going to be perfect and do it perfectly, I may as well not even try.
As I gained greater consciousness, I discovered that I did not have to be perfect to participate creatively, I just needed to be the beginner. In the book, “Zen Mind,” Shunryu Suzuki says, “In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities. In the experts mind, there are few.”
The beginner is Teflon armor against fear of failure because The Beginner is not supposed to know a damn thing. With this utterly simple, yet revolutionary insight, I gave myself permission to be the beginner and began to write. After literally writing nothing in 11 years but emails and, oh, I don’t know, the occasional thank you note, I was amazed that by suspending judgment. My creations flowed freely, and a most unusual thing occurred: I began to reveal myself authentically and vulnerably in a way I never had before, which restored a sense of integrity I had lost somewhere along my path.
Then, it was as if a wildfire caught a tail wind and suddenly creative passion was tearing through every facet of my being. A 600-page book poured out of me (being published later this year). I began playing guitar, singing and writing songs. I started painting big canvases full of bright colors. I built an art studio in my home. I began taking improv classes and dancing burlesque. The overwhelming desire to create generated such a monumental shift inside of me, triggering a cascade of spiritual changes. I had no idea the creative and the spiritual were so intricately woven together, propelling one another forward like happy bedfellows. For the first time in my life, I was genuinely awake, alive and inspired. The resentment I had been harboring toward my ex-boyfriend finally evaporated like stubborn condensation on the bathroom mirror. I realized it was not he who had abandoned me; I had abandoned myself and my dreams a time long ago in a bid to gain approval and acceptance. Like a seesaw, as my belief in myself went up, I watched my competition with others go down. I developed a genuine camaraderie with other women who were courageously following their dreams, and a sincere compassion for those still trapped in their own private prisons of perfection. It was then when I knew that my life’s work would center around helping women access the source of their feminine power.
The way to an adventurous, passionate, fulfilling existence is the exact opposite of what most of us have been programmed to believe. Life’s gifts do not come from being perfect and doing everything perfectly; they show up when we simply give ourselves permission. Permission is the golden key that unlocks a treasure trove of astounding passion. And passion is no accident. It is the compass directing you to your purpose.
In my personal experience, and in the experience of the women with whom I am honored to work, I have witnessed a universal truth. When we are lit up by our own lives, and inspired by our own creations, living on purpose, competition and comparison fall away and genuine sisterhood becomes possible. Women truly supporting one
another—all on the same side—is the beginning of a whole new earth.
My professional path unfolded organically. I began intensive coaching, facilitating online writing programs, speaking and hosting workshops internationally. I combined my passions—writing, surfing, yoga, clean eating, spirituality and empowering other women—and created a one-ofa-kind wellness retreat, where women can do all of this together. We call it “The Mermaid Sisterhood Retreat,” and I love watching how this carefully curated experience returns women to their innate, alluring, radiant light.
Watching the monkeys swing from the Guanacaste tree through my wallless living room, as my second child grows in my womb, not a day goes by that I do not marvel at the silent intelligence of spirit, constantly working on our behalf. Life does not happen to us, it is happening for us. The secret is not to let the hardships break you down, but instead, let them break you open. It is then that you will find yourself facing an exciting new horizon again and again, even more astonishing than the last.
Best contact info: Website: emilypereira.com Email: hello@emilypereira.com Instagram: @emilybegins
