FEAR & UNCERTAINTY

I am beyond thrilled to welcome you into our next issue of BodyMind Living Magazine, focused on navigating fear and uncertainty. As humans, we have a deep need for safety and we also have a need for freedom. Those needs tend to push and pull against each other, and in this month’s issue you will see our amazing BodyMind Ambassadors exemplifying just that. It was a last minute decision that filled up the time between my son, James, waking up from his nap and dinner time. After wrangling him into the minivan and carrying his wiggly toddler body and the pool bag through the parking lot, locker room, and around the pool, we made it to our shady little corner of the pool. He was excited! This push and pull of safety and freedom showed up recently when my family went to the pool. dear reader, ................................................................................... about it creates a rush of oxytocin in my body. So, here we were in the pool. Casey, my partner, and I were playing with James, passing him back and forth through the water and spinning him in circles. It felt fun and safe. And then it happened. It was so soft and so unassuming. There was no grand expression to get our attention. There was just this moment where his grip around my neck lessened and his little hands slipped off. It took me a second to realize what had happened, and when I did, a wave of fear rose up in my body. My stomach dropped. My heart started beating faster. My focus narrowed. I turned my head quickly, scanning the water to make sure he was ok. And there he was with a big smile on his face, floating through the water on his own — fully alive and free in the moment.

Once his swim vest was on, he waddled towards the edge of the pool and jumped in. Immediately upon entry, his arms did what they have always done, they wrapped around my neck as he held on tight.

I love it.

I love that he needs me. I love how his eyes get super wide after being dunked in the water and he immediately reaches for me and feels safe. I love being his rock. I love being his mom. Just thinking I took a deep breath to calm myself down.

“Do you see this?!” I motioned to Casey to look at our son, contently chilling in the pool on his own.

A part of me wanted to break down. My uncertainty in his ability to be on his own and still be safe engulfed my body. Is this what it is going to feel like when he goes to kindergarten by himself? When he drives a car by himself? When he goes off to college by himself?

Another part of me was so proud, seeing and feeling the freedom of this moment. My son was finding trust in himself. He was willing to let go of me — his safety — to trust in the safety that was around him. The skill of knowing that he is always held by something bigger than himself — in this case, his life jacket — will serve him his entire life. As his mother, my goal is to foster that inner knowing as he grows. At that moment, I saw him trust in himself. And it was beautiful.

I also worry about him, his safety, his future, and the world he will grow up in. I can do my best to foster his inner knowing as he grows. And at some point, he will have to let go and trust himself.

That moment of him letting go is where my greatest fear lies. It is also where his freedom begins. I hear parents all the time say that

Fear and uncertainty are part of life. Part of where we find our aliveness in life is from the fear and uncertainty. How do we stay grounded in those moments where life likes to throw a curveball? (CLICK THE IMAGE

ABOVE TO PLAY THE VIDEO)

........................................................................................................................... they want their kids to have a better future, and yet they often grasp onto safety and materialism which only adds to the challenges our kids face — climate change, racial injustice, the list goes on.

If we as parents truly want to create a better world for our kids, maybe we need to start doing our own work to create a more equitable and just world for our kids. And that means we have to face our fears and uncertainties. We have to have uncomfortable conversations. We have to demonstrate to our kids what it looks like to step into the unknown. For me to support my son in living his life, learning how to navigate my fear and uncertainty is essential.

As I sit here writing this opening letter to you, dear reader, I can’t help but wonder what edge I get to let go of in my own life. In living bodymind, growing a socially conscious business empowering holistic leaders, I often have to let go of the edge to step into the unknown. Having done this time and time again as a mom, business owner, spouse, daughter, friend, and white woman, I know fear and uncertainty show up in these moments of stepping toward the edge. I feel the tug of safety, of what seems known and certain, pulling from behind, asking, “Are you sure? What if it doesn’t work out? What will we lose?” Simultaneously, I sense the heart-opening opportunity of what lies just ahead when I take a step in what’s possible, with fear and uncertainty by my side.

We invite you to consider what fear and uncertainty mean in your life in this month’s issue. Philip Shepherd reminds us that people who chase safety in hopes of finding freedom, find neither; where people who chase freedom, find both. We need to move through fear and uncertainty to find fulfillment; bodymind living is not about bypassing fear and uncertainty... this shit is hard and it’s messy. And, we are here for it all!

Here are some affirmations and questions I play with when facing fear and uncertainty...

Affirmation: I am smart enough to figure it out.

Question: When have there been other times that I’ve figured it out? What did I do to get through?

Affirmation: I’m never stuck.

Question: What resources are available to me now to help me get through this?

Life as an entrepreneur and mom means diving head first into fear and uncertainty. Fear and uncertainty are a lifestyle.

It’s not that I’m not afraid. I just know how to work with my body’s signals rather than fight them.

I also recognize that the theme for this month’s issue evokes different emotions for each of us; thus, we leave it to you, our readers, to trust your own intuitive selves in navigating this issue (or not).

We share our stories as a way of creating connection and compassion.

We hope to hear your stories on Instagram at @BodyMindLiving.

With love, Laura