18.12 by boiMAGazine & boiMAG.com

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ISSUE 18.12 THE “BOI’S BEST” ISSUE Celebrating a Quarter-Century of Service TPAN’s 25th anniversary celebration, “The 25th Hour” on Thursday, Oct 4, at the Chicago Cultural Center will be a fun-filled celebration with special chef tasting, visual art, and live music by the soulful singer, Jamar Rogers from NBC’s The Voice.

3700 N. Halsted St. #2-S Chicago, IL 60613

773.975.0264

boieditorial@aol.com • boiads@aol.com

General admission is $75, VIP tickets, which include entry to the VIP Lounge, special raffle, and expedited entry are $150.

Publisher Mike Macharello Editor Rick Karlin Social Media Director Biggie Solis

The event is a celebration of 25 years of service that began in 1987 when Chris Clason brought together a group of people who were HIV positive, but had not been diagnosed with AIDS. These seventeen people were drawn together by the desire to share experiences, exchange ideas and information, and provide and accept support from each other. This was the beginning of Test Positive Aware Network.

layout & design Titanium Graphics, along with the generous support of: Art www.lizaragon.com by Liz Aragon *Thank You Liz, your creative generosity has made it possible for us to present this issue to our readers, and give them a visual experience, that without you, wouldn’t have been possible! It’s much appreciated!!

At the time Chris had sought out support groups in Chicago but found that the only ones available were for people with a diagnosis of AIDS. He felt he had come to terms with being HIV positive and was not “in crisis”. Yet, he also felt the desire for support and the desire to support others. Chris’ idea for a support group was rather simple. It would be a place for the exchange of information and personal experiences. It was to be a group where professionals provided input as information, not therapy, but a group where access to information was provided so that individuals could evaluate and decide their own treatments. A place for doctors to speak, but also alternative therapists, researchers, social workers, and other resource people. And finally, it was to be a place for social interaction, for meeting people. A place where one could “drop their guard” regarding their HIV status. Since that initial meeting of 16 people TPAN has grown, changed, evolved. Biweekly meetings became weekly meetings became multiple meetings each week. Social programs and gatherings were started, and ended and started again. Services evolved from just support groups to include the broad range of services offered today—support groups, one-on-one support, prevention services, community outreach, speakers bureau, a medical clinic, needle exchange, HIV services directories and Positively Aware. boi

advertising Freddie Dave

freddie@boimagazine.com dave@boimagzine.com

photographer Oliver Aguilar Eamonn Sexton Steve Starr editorial contributors Harry Taint Gregg Shapiro Anita Taylor Ace Magyar

VIEW BOI ONLINE AT

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SYMBOLS KEY

PAY ATTENTION: Something of Interest or Importance

CONTENTS

VOTED BOI’S BEST

VOTED BOI’S BEST (CONT.)

GAY & LESBIAN HALL OF FAME

LISA LAMPANELLI comes to chICAGO

GAY & LESBIAN HALL OF FAME (CONT.)

UNVEILING LEGACY WALK

boi’s best restaurants

CHICAGO SPOTLIGHT: CARRIE BARNETT

in the know, on the go!

ask ace (RELATIONSHIP & SEX ADVICE) LOCAL bars & clubs directory

17 22 25 29 30

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by Harry Taint Everyone has their own “best of” list, whether they take the time to write it down or not. My choice for “best’ pizza might not be the same as yours, but that doesn’t make yours any less valid. Recently we asked visitors to the BOI web site along with the BOI Blast Subscribers, to select their personal best in a number of categories. We compiled their suggestions and present them here for you. When the margin between the top vote and the runner-up were statistically close enough to call it a tie, we did so. Congratulations to all those who were selected. Don’t see your favorites here? Then join in and let us know next time. Best Video Bar or Club

Bar or Club with the Best Food

Halsted’s

Best Latino Bar or Club

Circuit Night Club

Best hip-hop Bar, Club or Promotion

Urbano

Best Irish Pub or Tavern

Lady Gregory

Bar or Club w Best Drag Performances

Spin

Best Lesbian Bar, Club or Promotion

Sidetrack

Parlour on Clark

Hydrate

Queen at Smart Bar

Jackhammer

Buena Bar

Touche

Slushies at Sidetrack

Kit Kat Lounge & Supper Club

Cocktail

Hamburger Mary’s

Hunter’s

Pie Hole

Smart Bar

Ping Pong

Cocktail

Angelina

Crew

Fal-a-Fill

Parlour on Clark

El Mariachi

Charlie’s

The Edge Bar & Grill

Best Dance Bar or Club Best Cruising Bar or Club Best Leather Bar or Club Best Patio at a Bar or Club Best Value Night spot a Club or Bar Best Suburban Bar or Club Best Mixed-Crowd Bar or Club Best Dancer or Stripper Bar or Club Best Sports Bar or Club Best Neighborhood Bar Best Country & Western Bar or Club

Best Funky-Groove Bar or Club best Dive Bar or Club Favorite Cocktail Best Neighborhood Restaurant Best American Food Restaurant Best Pizza spot Best Asian Restaurant Best Italian Restaurant Best Mediterranean Restaurant Best Mexican Restaurant Best 24 Hour Restaurant

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(Continued ....) Best Adult Bookstore

The Ram

Best Live Music Venue

Mayne Stage House of Blues

Best Comedy Club

Best diner

Laugh Factory

Favorite DJ

The Logan

Favorite Bartender

Music Box

Horizon

Frankie Knuckles

Roland @ Cocktail Brian @ Sidetrack

Best Pride Parade Entry

Best Small Theater Best Large Theater Best Multiplex

Century Landmark

Favorite Local Celebrity

P.F.L.A.G.

Circuit Mom

Bob Yeaworth

Freida Lay

AIDS Foundation

Night of 100 Drag Queens Dance for Life

Favorite Promoter Favorite Charitable Organization

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favorite local Drag Queen Best Charity Event

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Comedy’s Lovable Queen of Mean

Lisa Lampanelli

A cross between Don Rickles, Archie Bunker, and a vial of estrogen, has been heralded as “more than a stand-up, a standout,” by comedy legend Jim Carrey. The equal opportunity offender is a regular on “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno” and Howard Stern’s Sirius satellite radio shows. She has also appeared on “Late Show with David Letterman,” “Lopez Tonight”, “Chelsea Lately”, “Jimmy Kimmel Live” and was a finalist on NBC’s “Celebrity Apprentice” last season. Her HBO comedy special, “Long Live the Queen” and her autobiography, “Chocolate, Please, My Adventures in Food, Fat and Freaks,” were just stepping-stones to Lisa’s rise to the top of the comedy food chain. She is one of the few white comedians to perform on BET’s “Comic View,” cementing her huge crossover appeal. A year later, she rocked Comedy Central once again in her back-to-back appearances on “Premium Blend” and on the enormously rated “Roast of Jeff Foxworthy.” Lisa’s performances on the Comedy Central roasts of Pamela Anderson and William Shatner, among others, received national attention. A CD release of her Comedy Central special “Dirty Girl” got her nominated for a Grammy Award for 2007’s Best Comedy Album of the Year. Ms. Lampanelli will appear at The Chicago Theater on Friday October 5. 12 boi

Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame Inducts Twelve Individuals and Three Organizations by Rick Karlin

The Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame, (he country’s only government‑recognized hall of fame that honors members of the lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender communities will induct twelve individuals and three organizations at the Chicago History Museum, on Monday, Nov. 12. The reception and ceremony, which is free and open to the public, takes place at 6:00 p.m.

2012 Hall of Fame Inductees Lois L. Bates (1970-2011), for her 14 years as an advocate for transgender youth and other GLBT youth. St. Sukie de la Croix, for his 25 years as a social commentator and researcher on Chicago’s GLBT history. His book “Chicago Whispers” is the definitive book on local pre-Stonewall GLBT history.

Sanford E. Gaylord, for his 17 years as an actor, writer and HIV/AIDS activist. He co-founded “A Real Read”, an African-American GLBT performance ensemble; has written for GLBT-themed films and in columns for GLBT media.

William W. Greaves, for 25+ years as an activist iand as a member from 1995 to 2000 and as the director from 2000 through 2011 of the city Advisory Council on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender Issues. Keith R. Green, for 10 years of work on the HIV/AIDS epidemic among black gay and bisexual men. He was associate editor of Positively Aware, helped to establish the anti-AIDS group Chicago Black Gay Men’s Caucus and is on the AIDS Foundation of Chicago staff. Mark Ishaug, for 21 years of work as a Chicago social-service administrator concentrating on AIDS and as a political activist. He led the AIDS Foundation of Chicago from 1998 to 2011 and was on its staff since 1991. Bill Pry, a business owner, philanthropist, and advocate. As owner of BBJ Table Fashions he has donated tens of thousands of dollars’ worth of services to enhance local organizations’ programs and events. He has also been a vocal advocate for increased services to help GLBTQ youth. Chuck Rodocker, for his more than 30 years as an activist and communityminded business owner. In 1977, he purchased the bar Touché, which has been a place of community ever since, hosting benefits and meetings and responding to a variety of social needs. (Continued on next page)

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Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame Inducts Twelve Individuals and Three Organizations Heather C. Sawyer, for nearly 10 years of service in Chicago’s Midwest Regional Office of (Continued ) Lambda Legal and her subsequent efforts in Congress. As minority counsel for the House Judiciary Committee, she has continued working for marriage rights. Honey West, for more than 25 years as a cabaret singer and entertainer in Chicago nightclubs and restaurants. She has blended her transgender identity into her career, and during that career, she has often performed at benefits for AIDS and other charities.

Proud to Run, has conducted races during Pride Week each year. The annual events have grown to more than 1,400 participants and, in the past three decades, have raised more than $300,000 for local beneficiaries.

Non-gay allies are recognized with a “Friend of the Community” induction title. This year’s recipients include: David Orr, Cook County Clerk, and an out-spoken advocate for GLBT rights for more than 38 years. As Cook County Clerk, he has helped set up a county domestic-partnership registry, pass the state civil-unions law, win the current marriage suit, and oppose DOMA.

Organizations inducted include: Chicago Black Gay Men’s Caucus, for bridging gaps between traditional health providers and nontraditional providers that serve black men who have sex with men. Chi-Town Squares, and one of its offshoots is the well-known She Devils, for its 25 years of fund-raising and breaking barriers between GLBT and non-GLBT square dancers, while teaching and providing a venue for GLBT square dancing in Chicago. 14 boi

Laura S. Washington, for her 29 years of supporting GLBT communities as a journalist. She has illuminated GLBT goals and achievements through her columns in the Chicago Sun-Times and alternative media and earlier as editor of the Chicago Reporter magazine. For more info, visit glhalloffame.org

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BOI’S BEST RESTAURANTS AMERICAN___________ Ann Sather 929 W. Belmont 773.348.2378. 5207 N Clark 773.271.6627 & 3411 N Broadway 773.305.0024. These bustling hot spots, serving traditional Swedish pancake house fare, are best known for hearty fare and delish cinnamon rolls.

IHOP 3760 N. Halsted 773.296.0048. More than a

The Bagel 3107 N. Broadway 773.477.0300

the poplular sports at this friendly neighborhood sports bar. Known for their killer burgers. They offer a late night menu along with daily specials and even brunch on Sundays.

The quintessential Jewish style deli is the perfect spot for a corned beef or pastrami sandwich, some chicken soup, lox and bagels or a full dinner that tastes as if someone’s Jewish momma made it.

Chicago Diner 3411 N. Halsted 773.935.6696

This world famous vegetarian restaurant offers vegan and organic offerings. Organic beers, wine, and spirits are also available.

Clark Street Dog 3040 N. Clark 773.281-6690. Open until four in the morning and serving up all the deliciousness you can imagine after you leave the bar.

Crew 4804 N. Broadway 773.784.2739. More than just a sports bar, the menu includes a variety of hamburgers, sandwiches, salads & comfort food.

Golden Nugget Family Restaurants

2406 W. Diversey 773.252.8903. 1765 W. Lawrence 773.769.6700. A great option for after bar dining as they are all open 24-7, and have free parking. The large menu is sure to please, especially the classic breakfast and hearty dinners. Everything is housemade, known for fluffy buttermilk pancakes.

The Gardens at Cocktail 3359 N. Halsted

-773.472.1420 The Gardens serves delicious homemade pizzas, at a great price, with drink specials to match!

Halsted’s Bar & Grill 3441 N. Halsted

773.348.9696 This Boystown eatery serves up a wide array of tasty appetizers, burgers, sandwiches, and popular comfort food items at very reasonable prices in a fun and inviting atmosphere. Beers on tap are aplenty and the weekend brunch draws an attractive crowd.

Hamburger Mary’s 5400 N. Clark

773.784.6969. “Eat, Drink and be... MARY” at this fun and popular Andersonville restaurant which features a wide array of burgers and sandwiches, along with an interesting selection of tasty appetizers. Wash it all down with one of Mary’s home-brewed ales.

Horizon Café 3805 N. Broadway 773.883.1565.

This long-time popular Lakeview family restaurant serves up big portions of creative homestyle dishes as well as healthy fare at affordable prices. Breakfast served all day long. Delivery available.

pancake house, this 24-hour Boystown institution serves up affordably priced appetizers, sandwiches, and entrees that are sure to satisfy varying after-bar wants and needs.

Jury’s 4337 N. Lincoln 773.935.2255. Watch all

Kit Kat Lounge 3700 N. Halsted 773.525.1111.

Providing the best of diva entertainment along with a full dinner menu, they offer ½-price cocktails and Buy 1 Get 1 Free Entree on Wednesdays.. On Monday nights get 50% off your entire bill.

Nookies Tree 3334 N. Halsted 773.248.9888 and Nookies Edgewater1100 W. Bryn

Mawr 773.516-4188. A regular haunt for the locals of Boystown (also Edgewater) and popular with hangover recoverees, the diner serves made-to-order omelets, pancakes, waffles and other brunch fare all day. And it’s open 24 hours on weekends.

Melrose 3233 N Broadway 773.327.2060. This

Lakeview institution has been catering to the afterbar crowds for decades, serving breakfast anytime along with typical diner fare. Open 24 hours

Philly’s Best 907 W. Belmont 773.525.7900.

Authentic Philly cheese steak sandwich. Their meat is brought directly from Philadelphia. Also, medium crust pizza, oven baked grinders & fresh salads.

Pie Hole Pizza 3477 N. Broadway 773.525.8888. Their “hole” is open Sunday-Thursday from 11amMidnight and Friday & Saturday until 3am. Grab it and go or have it delivered.. your pizza, that is!!

Rainbow Pizza 3450 N. Halsted . Serving up pizza by the slice. Open late nights Wed.-Sat. and cater to the hoards on Halsted looking for a quick bite to eat.

Stella’s Diner 3042 N. Broadway 773.472.9040.

Friendly staff serve up delicious diner fare, such as; fresh salads, a large selection of wraps, sandwiches, hearty entrees, pastas, and homemade desert

The Edge 2720 N. Clark St 773.929-7024. A bar

and grill serving breakfast, steaks, seafood, ribs, with a full bar until 2am. Free parking lot and open 24hrs.

Wilde Bar & Restaurant 3130 N. Broadway

773.244.0404. This cozy upscale Irish pub offers a laid back and warm atmosphere and a wide ranging menu that is sure to please. Expect updated versions of pub favorites such as chicken pot pie, meatloaf, fish & chips, burgers and salads.

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BOI’S BEST RESTAURANTS ASIAN__________________

MEDITERRANEAN____

Dragon Lady Lounge 3188 N. Elston

Andies 1467 W. Montrose 773.348.0654. 5253 N

773.267.1970 Serving Korean-Latin fusion dishes from delicious fresh Bi Bim Bop and Kim Chi Veggie burgers, to delicious tofu tacos and beef Kim Chi burgers. ITALIAN_________________

Anna Maria Pasteria 4400 N. Clark

773.506.2662. Owned by sisters who hail from the Basilicata region of southern Italy, this neighborhood gem creates homemade modern and traditional Italian dishes that are authentic, delicious & inexpensive.

Angelina Ristorante 3561 N. Broadway

773.935.5933. Hosting the coolest and hippest Sunday brunch crowd in Lakeview, the menu includes Eggs Benedict, fritattas, Croque Monsieur and mufaletta sandwiches, almond-crusted stuffed French toast, and the free flow of Champagne mimosas. Brunch here is loud, raucous and FUN! Great for dinner, as well.

Club Lucky 1824 W. Wabansia Ave. 773.227.2300. Popular Bucktown/Wicker Pk. restaurant & unique cocktail lounge. Generous portions of traditional Italian specialties and daily specials. Outdoor patio.

Panino’s Pizzeria 3702 N. Broadway

773.472.6200. Panino’s has established itself as a Boystown favorite with its varied menu selections, including gyros and burgers, pasta entrees, and of course pizza. Delivery available.

Piehole Pizza 3477 N. Broadway 773.525.8888. From their hole to yours. Traditional pizza served in untraditional ways. Delivering until late at night.

Mia Francesca 3311 N. Clark St. 773.281.3310.

Celebrating over 20 years in Lakeview. A zesty, earthy cuisine of Rome and the surrounding areas of Tuscany, Umbria and Lazio. Encourages the lively art of dining with a contemporary, casually sophisticated trattoria ambiance, simple, rustic cooking, friendly service and fair prices. Beautiful private outdoor patio and weekend brunch.

Viaggio at the Park 401 W. Fullerton 773.747.3333, and Viaggio Ristorante & Lounge 1330 W. Madison 312.829.3333

Both locations provide a unique, memorable, dining experience by satisfying three essential must-haves, superior food-quality, a beautiful, comforting ambiance, and a service-staff that makes you feel like family. What more could you ask for?? 18 boi

Clark 773.784.8616. Specializing in Mediterranean and vegetarian cuisine, specialties of the house include steak kabobs, gyros, and poultry dishes such as Greek Chicken and Lebanese Style Chicken Kefta Kabob. And as befits the cuisine, desserts include a very tasty baklava. The Sunday buffet brunch is extravagant and reasonably priced.

Gyro-Mena 905 W. Belmont 773.935.2600.

Augments the Athenian Gyros by satisfying the American desire to pick our own toppings! True Athenian Gyros is a choice of all natural non-ground meat (pork or chicken) stacked and cooked on a rotisserie. MEXICAN/LATIN__________

Cesar’s 2924 N. Broadway 773.296.9097 and at

3166 N Clark 773.248.2835 This family-owned operation offers an enticing menu full of delicious Mexican recipes, popular house specialties, irresistible desserts, and their signature “Killer Margaritas.”

El Mariachi 3906 N. Broadway 773.549-2932

and at 3420 N. Broadway 773.549-7020. Quickly becoming one of the very best Mexican restaurants in the city, the focus is on using fresh, high-quality ingredients for its “south of the border” cuisine. Full bar featuring over 100 brands of tequila.

El Nuevo Mexicano 2914 N. Clark 773.528.2131. Cozy dining room along with authentic Mexican cuisine makes this a great place for delicious dining. Open for lunch & dinner, great patio for summer outdoor dining. Delivery available too!

Las Mananitas 3523 N. Halsted St. 773.528.2109. Traditional & regional Mexican dishes along with freshly squeezed limes for margaritas. Nice place to eat, drink and window watch people on Halsted St. Has a full bar & plenty of hardy dishes to satisfy any appetite. Serving the community for over 28 years. Fiesta Mexicana 2423 N. Lincoln Ave 773.348.4144 (2nd Location) 4806 N. Broadway 773.769.4244. Traditional favorites along with great ambiance. Nice place to bring your family, friends or bring a date to. The Lincoln location has daily specials & live music. Is your target market in our distribution area?? ADVERTISE YOUR RESTAURANT IN BOI MAGAZINE Call 773.975.0264 or email us at boiADS@aol.com More listings @ boimagazine.com, click on Dining link

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UNVEILING The LEGACY WALK Slated to be unveiled on ‘National Coming Out Day’, Oct. 11, The Legacy Walk will be an outdoor ‘walking museum’ celebrating the achievements and contributions of GLBT people to world history and culture. This installation will be the first exhibit of its kind in the world. Bronze plaques affixed to the signature rainbow pylons running up and down Halsted will commemorate important GLBT figures. The plaques feature a bronze relief portrait and a biography of the individual. Plaques which celebrate historic milestones, will feature an extended story about an occurrence of substantial change or import that marked a turning point in GLBT history or was promulgated by a GLBT person or persons. Among the milestones celebrated will be explanations of the significance of “The Pink Triangle,” and the fate of gays in the Holocaust during World War II; “The Harlem Renaissance,” about the first multi-faceted GLBT urban subculture created by African-Americans in the 1920s; “The American Psychological Association Vote,” which declared homosexuality was not a mental illness; and the “Stonewall Riot,” which signaled the birth of the modern GLBT Civil Rights Movement. In 1991, Chicago instituted the world’s only Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame (GLHF). The GLHF recognizes the contributions of its GLBT citizens both to the city as a whole and the GLBT community (see story in this year’s inductees elsewhere in this issue). Several years later Chicago once again chose to celebrate GLBT people by installing the first-of-its-kind “Rainbow Pylon” streetscape on Halsted. The combination of GLHF inductions and the 1998 dedication of the “Northalsted Corridor” as the nexus of the GLBT Community helped to crystallize the concept of the Legacy Project. The Inaugural Dedication of The Legacy Walk on Oct. 11, National Coming Out Day, will begin with a tented ticketed ceremony at 3 p.m. The reveal, which is is open to the public, will feature individual gatherings around each pylon for the simultaneous reveal at 4 p.m. Ticketed events are available at multiple levels. The $100 general admission ticket includes general seating at the tent ceremony, a keepsake program book, a commemorative pin and a post-ceremony reception at Sidetrack featuring a sponsored bar by Halsted vodka, buffet by J&L Catering and entertainment, The $200 VIP admission adds a pre-ceremony gathering with dignitaries and special invited guests, reserved seating at the tent and a gift bag. Tickets may be purchased at legacyprojectchicago.org/dedication_tickets.html.

THE 2012 Legacy Walk Inductees

JANE ADDAMS Nobel Prize-winning social justice pioneer and founder of the American Civil Liberties Union. ALVIN AILEY Internationally acclaimed choreographer and dancer who pioneered African-American cultural expression through dance. REINALDO ARENAS Cuban author and social justice activist imprisoned for protesting Castro’s criminalization of gay people. JAMES BALDWIN Pulitzer Prize-winning author of “Go Tell It On The Mountain” and “Giovanni’s Room”. DR. MARGARET CHUNG First U.S. born Chinese woman to become a physician and founder of the Women’s Naval Reserves (WAVES). BARBARA GITTINGS Activist who spearheaded the drive to overturn the classification of homosexuality as a mental illness in the 1970s. KEITH HARING Ionic artist whose work came to define the aesthetic sensibilities of the 1980s. BARBARA JORDAN First African-American woman elected to Congress from a southern state. She was awarded Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1997. CHRISTINE JORGENSEN First widely- known transgender person. She was catapulted from obscurity into the unprecedented role of spokesperson for people with “gender dysphoria”. FRIDA KAHLO Mexican painter, the forerunner of the NeoMexicanismo artistic movement and the first Hispanic woman on a U.S. postage stamp. DR. ALFRED KINSEY U.S. sex researcher whose 1950s study of American sexual proclivities continues to spark controversy. LEONARD MATLOVICH Pioneering serviceman whose declaration of homosexuality in the 1970s prompted the decades long struggle for the rights of GLBT people to serve openly in the U.S. Military, culminating with the repeal of “Don’t’ Ask, Don’t Tell”. HARVEY MILK Civil Rights icon who became the first openly gay man elected to a public office in the U.S., before he was assassinated. DR. ANTONIA PANTOJA Influential social justice advocate. She was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom in 1997. BAYARD RUSTIN A Civil rights pioneer. He was Dr. Martin Luther King’s speechwriter and the architect of the 1963 March on Washington. TWO SPIRIT PEOPLE U.S. and Canadian GLBT tribes-people who fulfill various mixed-gender roles and identities. ALAN TURING British mathematician, considered “The father of computer science”. He broke the Nazi’s “Enigma Code” to help bring down Adolf Hitler OSCAR WILDE His public trial for “the love that dare not speak its name” in Britain led to a nascent “gay consciousness” that would later become the foundation of the early GLBT rights movement.

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CHICAGO SPOTLIGHT: CARRIE BARNETT Interviews with leaders in Chicago’s GLBT community By Gregg Shapiro Carrie Barnett, a 1998 inductee to the Chicago Gay and Lesbian Hall of Fame. She has been active in the Chicago LGBT community is the former owner of People Like Us Books (open from 1988 through 1997), Chicago’s only exclusively gay and lesbian bookstore. Carrie continues her professional career as an entrepreneur. She is part owner of a software company that works in the health care field. When did you come out and what was the experience like for you? Coming out is a lifelong experience in some ways, but the bulk of the journey for me came between the ages of 12 and 28. At 12, I found myself, as some girls do, playing “practice” kissing games at a slumber party with my friends. That was the initial coming out to myself. My undergraduate education was at Stephens College, which is a small women’s college in Missouri. It was there that I learned about lesbian culture and found so much more of me. The last big coming out step was opening People Like Us Books. That was a more external coming out, with its own lessons and rewards. My adult life continues to present me with coming out moments and I continue to learn from each of them. The experience of coming out has been both terrifying and gratifying, the challenges still arise in professional situations. I continue to learn how to simply, “be me”. Name five of your LGBT heroes and say a few words about why you chose them. Brett Shingledecker; because when we were talking about opening the bookstore he told me not to fear telling people it was a gay and lesbian bookstore and to talk about it without shame or embarrassment which would, in turn, not give anyone the opportunity to respond in an inappropriate manner. David Feinberg; because he was brilliant and funny and (his novel) “Eighty Sixed” moved me so deeply and told a story of AIDS with humor and truth. When I met him we connected instantly. He was so present and real. I miss all the books he didn’t get the chance to write. 22 boi

Barbara Grier and Donna McBride; because they were fearless and paved the way for the explosion of lesbian and gay literature. Urvashi Vaid ; because her insight and leadership helped create a legitimacy to the GLBT political movement, which has brought us to this moment where the president used the word “gay” in his nomination acceptance speech. Harry Hay; because of his bravery and passion to help create community. Imagine him in the 50s and 60s. It was a much less tolerant environment. But, it didn’t stop him from being his true self. I was lucky enough to meet him. His energy was magical. What do you consider to be your most significant contribution to the LGBT community in Chicago and at large? The most significant is surely People Like Us Books. The bookstore was a place where anyone could come and learn about our city, our history, and our culture. We had the opportunity to talk with publishers and communicate to them the types of books people wanted to read. It was amazing to see these books published not long after. I think, too, that our decision not to segregate our books by gender was an important part of our philosophy. It exposed people to more books and, as a result, learn more about all aspects of our culture and sub cultures. Without gay and lesbian bookstores our literature and issues might still be represented by a single bookcase in (what’s left of) all the general bookstores. What are your future goals and aspirations?

Yikes! Goals and aspirations at 52? To continue to participate in the world by being the best me I can muster. Words of wisdom to the next GLBT generation? Enjoy the freedom but don’t forget the fight!

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in the Know, on the Go Night Moves

Run off and join the circus with Circuit Mom’s “Circuit Revolution” on Oct. 27 at The House of Blues... Monday, Oct. 1 United House “A Night of Unity in House Music” kicks off at Circuit Night Club where everyone is family (including black, white, Latin, Asian, GBLTQ and straight,) Presented by Cyon Flare... Sidetrack will celebrate the 50th anniversary (just kidding, it’s the 20th) of “Night of 100 Drag Queens” with a huge, special blow-out with a video retrospective.

Pressure Cooker

Pressures from Alderman Proco “Joe” Moreno have resulted in an internal company declaration by Chick-fil-A that they will no longer fund anti-gay organizations and that they have clarified in an internal document that the company will treat every person equally, regardless of sexual orientation according to a press release from The Civil Rights Agenda. Gr8!

Divas! Divas! Divas!

Don’t miss “ We’ll All Be Dead by Christmas 2012”, the new show by Orbitz spokeswoman, Miss Richfield 1981 at Hydrate on Friday and Saturday... The funniest lesbian on earth, Wanda Sykes, appears Saturday, Sept. 29, at the Chicago Theatre... Fran Lebowitz, the funniest lesbian who has never said she’s a lesbian, conducts her “A State of the Union Conversation” Tuesday, Oct. 2, at the Harris Theater... Antronios Bar & Grill, in Berwyn presents “Women’s Night Out: A Dance for All Women” on Saturday, Sept. 29. The event is sponsored by the Oak Park Area Lesbian and Gay Association ($10/person.) All proceeds will go to the Chicago Women’s Health Center... Michael Feinstein with Jeff Lindberg’s Chicago Jazz Orchestra on Saturday, Sept. 29 at The Auditorium Theatre. Performing classic songs that have delighted audiences throughout the decades, these two musical sensations will guide audiences on a journey through some of the most beloved music of our time.

Run, Don’t Walk

AIDS Run & Walk Chicago Sunday, Sept. 30, Soldier Field (southeast corner.) Wanda Sykes and Michael Feinstein will be at the start line, kicking off the race.

Underwear Lounge?!

Our friends at Cram are at it again! Thursday, Oct. 11 from From 8-10pm is the opening of their newly designed underwear lounge with models & music.

Gregg Shapiro’s Theater Scene

Academy Award nominee Diane Lane stars in Goodman Theatre’s production of “Sweet Bird of Youth” by Tennessee Williams, running through Oct. 25… Hell in a Handbag Productions revives the show that started it all for them, “SCARRIE The Musical,” the unauthorized “Carrie” parody/homage originally produced in 1998, at Mary’s Attic, Sept. 28 thru Nov. 10… A musical celebration of the life and work of the late Edward Kleban (“A Chorus Line” and others), “A Class Act,” subtitled “a musical about musicals,” is the opening production in Porchlight Music Theatre’s 2012/2013 season, running through Oct. 14 at Theater Wit… “Woody Sez” celebrates the music and life of folk troubadour Woody Guthrie, through Oct. 21 at Northlight Theater in Skokie… Based on the unintentionally campy movie of the same name, the intentionally campy stage musical adaptation of ”Xanadu,” runs through Oct. 28 at Drury Lane Oakbrook… Queen, you know you want to see “One Name Only,” subtitled A Different Kind of Reality Show, a tribute to the music of such Ladies of Soul as Aretha, Patti, Gladys, Tina and Whitney, at Black Ensemble Theater… Steppenwolf Theatre Company’s production of “Good People” by Pulitzer Prize-winner David Lindsay-Abaire, directed by out ensemble member K. Todd Freeman, runs through Nov. 11 in the Downstairs Theatre. boi 25

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Ask Ace

Relationship & sex Advice

Smell Him

I know this great guy, he’s one of my best friends. He keeps moaning about how he never can get a second date, much less keep a boyfriend. How do I tell him it’s because he stinks? He’s a heavy smoker and his clothes and hair reek of tobacco. Not only that, he’s not very good about his personal hygiene. We always meet at bars and clubs because I don’t want him in my house, the place smells for hours after he has left. Other than that, he’s perfect; he is smart, witty, good-looking and a sweet man. I don’t want to hurt his feelings, but he really doesn’t have a clue.

If he really doesn’t have a clue, give him one; be up front and honest with him. The next time he says something about not getting any second dates, tell him that you think he’s a wonderful guy and anyone would be lucky to have him, but that he may be turning people off because of his odor. Smokers often don’t have a very good sense of smell, so he may not even realize it. Mention everything you said in your letter. Even if he takes offense initially, he may come to thank you about it. If you can’t bring yourself to tell him face to face, send him an anonymous note, along with a bar of soap, some deodorant and a package of Nicoderm.

Lesbian Bed Death

My wife and I have been together for 10 years and I don’t think we’ve had sex together for the last three. She went through menopause and since then just isn’t interested in sex, she never makes a move on me. I still love her and think she’s hot and I’m not ready to give up on us. Any Suggestions?

LBD

First of all, it’s not “lesbian bed death” most long-term couples, gay and straight, face the same issue. It reminds me of Robin Williams’ line about people who oppose same sex marriage, “What are they fighting about anyone who has been married a long time

will tell you the sex is always the same.” You mention that you haven’t had sex together in a while, the key word is together. If your wife is masturbating instead of sex with you, then you need to discuss that. Perhaps she’s a little bored, try spicing things up. If she’s not having sex at all, it might be a hormonal imbalance, which often occurs as people age. She should see a physician to have that checked. I notice that you also mention that she hasn’t initiated sex, have you? If you have and she has declined, let her know sex is still important to you. Ask her to hold you while you masturbate. It may feel a little awkward at first, but you’ll still be close and, who knows, it may trigger a reaction?

Not Laughing

My supervisor at work is always telling jokes, mostly they’re harmless and most are somewhat corny. Lately there’s been a few jokes that are a little homophobic in nature. There were never any homophobic statements made in the past, so I was surprised by this. The jokes make me very uncomfortable. I’m not “out” at the office, so I don’t know how to let my supervisor know I don’t like hearing those kinds of jokes. What can I do?

You don’t have to be black to find racist jokes appalling, or a woman to take offense at misogynistic jokes. So objecting to gay jokes won’t necessarily “out” you. Are the other jokes of a similar nature? If so, you should be objecting to those, too. The first step would be to inform your supervisor that you don’t really appreciate the jokes because they make you feel uncomfortable. If the jokes continue, you can complain to your supervisors boss or see someone in your H.R. dept. (depending on the size of your company). If the jokes continue, you can always file a sexual harassment complaint. ______________________________________

Ace Magyar has a BA in communications, a MA in sex therapy and a PhD in zoology. He is a registered couple’s counselor specializing in the GLBT community. Send your questions to boieditorial@aol.com. boi 29

CHICAGO BARS & CLUBS Boystown / Lakeview

3160 3160 N.Clark G&L, LM,DS Berlin 954 W. Belmont G&L, D, 4 Bobby Love’s 3729 N. Halsted G&L Buck’s Saloon 3439 N. Halsted G Cell Block 3702 N. Halsted G, LF Charlie’s 3726 N. Broadway G, D, W Circuit 2.02 3641 N. Halsted G&L, D, 4 Cocktail 3359 N. Halsted G, GB Elixir Lounge 3452 N. Halsted G, 4 F. O’Mahony’s 3701 N. Broadway G&L, R Hydrate 3458 N. Halsted G, D, DS, 4 Kit Kat 3700 N. Halsted G&L, DS, R Little Jim’s 3501 N. Halsted G, V, 4 Lucky Horseshoe 3169 N. Halsted G, GB Manhandler 1948 N. Halsted G, W, 4 Minibar 3341 N. Halsted G, R North End 3733 N. Halsted G Roscoe’s 3356 N. Halsted G, D, V, DS Scarlet 3320 N. Halsted G Sidetrack 3349 N. Halsted G, V Smart Bar / Metro 3730 N. Clark MS, D, 4 Spin 800 W. Belmont G&L, V, 4 The Closet 3325 N. Broadway G&L, V, 4

773.327.5969 773.348.4975 773.525.1200 773.525.1125 773.665.8064 773.871.8887 773.325.2233 773.477.1420 773.477.1420 773.549.0226 773.975.9244 773.525.1111 773.871.6116 773.404.3169 773.871.3339 773.871.6227 773.477.7999 773.281.3355 773.348.1053 773.477.9189 773.549.4140 773.327.7711 773.477.8533

Chicago Northside CONTINUED

Crew 4804 N. Broadway G&L, V, R 773.784.2739 Davenport’s 1383 N. Milwaukee G&L, LM 773.278.1830 Debonair Social Club 1575 N. MilwaukeeAve. MS, D 773.227.7990 Fat Cat 4849 N. Broadway MS, R 773.506.3100 Green Dolphin 2200 N. Ashland G&L, D, LM, 4 773.395.0066 Green Mill 4802 N. Broadway MS, LM, 4 773.878.5552 In Fine Spirits 5420 N Clark MS, R 773.334.9463 Jackhammer 6406 N. Clark G, D, V, GB, LM, 4 773.743.5772 Joi de Vine 1744 W. Balmoral L, R 773.989.6846 Kinetic Playground 1113 W. LawrenceMS, D, LM, 4 773.769.5483 Marty’s 1511 W. Balmoral G&L 773.561.6425 Mary’s Attic 5400 N Clark G&L, D, V, R 773.784.6969 Parlour On Clark 6341 N. Clark 773.564.9274 Mary’s RecRoom 5402 N Clark G&L, D, V, R 773.784.6969 Scot’s 1829 W. Montrose G&L 773.528.3253 Scot’s 1829 W. Montrose G&L 773.528.3253 Sidecar Bar 6920 N. Glenwood 773.764.2826 T’s 5025 N. Clark G&L, R 773.784.6000 The Call 1547 W Bryn Mawr G&L, D, DS, V, LM 773.334.2525 The Glenwood 6962 N Glenwood G 773.764.7363 Touché 6412 N. Clark G, V, LF, 4 773.465.7400 Uptown Lounge 1136 W. Lawrence 773.878.1136

Chicago Downtown-Near north Chicago Southside

Baton Show Lounge 436 N. Clark DS 312.644.5269 Club 720 720 N. Wells MS, D, 4 312.787.8720 Crimson Lounge 333 N. Dearborn MS, D, R 312.923.2473 Downtown Bar & Lounge 440 N State G 312.464.1400 Dragon Lady Lounge 3188 N. Elston 773.267.1970 Excalibur/Vision 632 N. Dearborn MS, D, 4 312.266.1944 Funky Buddha 728 W. Grand Ave. MS, D 312.666.1695 House of Blues 329 N. Dearborn MS, LM, 4 312.923.2000 Krush/Prop House 1657 N. Elston G&L, D, 4 773.486.2390 Nikki 1543 N. Kingsbury St. MS, D, 4 312.857.5009 Second Story Bar 157 E. Ohio G, V 312.923.9536 Sound Bar 226 W. Ontario MS, D, 4 312.787-4480 Spy Bar 646 N. Franklin MS, D, 4 312.587.8779 Underground 56 W. Illinois MS, D, 4 312.644.7600 Vibe 1543 N. Kingsbury MS, D, 4 312.266.1900

Club Escape 1530 E. 75th G&L, D Escapades 6301 S. Harlem G&L, D, V, 4 Inn Exile 5758 W. 65th G&L, D, V Jeffrey Pub 7041 S. Jeffrey G&L, D, V, 4

Chicago Northside

Banana Video 4923 N. Clark G, BK Bijou Theater 1349 N. Wells G, GB, BK Man’s Country 5017 N. Clark G, GB, BH Steamworks 3246 N. Halsted G, BH, FC The Ram 35111/2 N. Halsted G, BK, D

The Anvil 1137 W. Granville G, V @mosphere 5355 N. Clark G&L, V, GB Big Chicks 5024 N. Sheridan G&L, D, R

773.973.0006 773.784.1100 773.728.5511

G------------------------------------------------------------------Gay Male L---------------------------------------------------------------------Lesbian G&L-------------------------------------------------Gay Male & Lesbian D-------------------------------------------------------------------Dancing V-----------------------------------------------------------------------Video GB-------------------------------------------------------------Go Go Boys DS--------------------------------------------------------------Drag Show R--------------------------------------------------------Restaurant, Food

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Chicago Suburbs

773.667.6454 773.229.0886 773.582.3510 773.363.8555

Hideaway 7301 W. Roosevelt Forest Park G, D, V, DS, GB Club Krave 13126 S. Western Blue Island G&L, D, V, DS, GB, 4 Hunters 1932 E. Higgins Elk Grove Village G, D, V, GB, 4 Mission 209 E. Chicago Downtown Elgin G&L, D, V Encompass 24215 Rush St. Lake Station, IN G&L, D, R, DS Velvet Rope 728 Lake St Oak Park G&L, D, V, R

Adult Entertainment

708.771.4459 708.597.8379 847.439.8840 847.488.0320 219.962.4640 708.358.8840

773.561.8322 312.943.5397 773.878.2069 773.929.6080 773.525.9528

4-------------------------------------------------------------Open til 4am MS--------------------------------------------------------Mostly Straight LF---------------------------------------------------------Leather / Fetish W-------------------------------------------------------------------Western LM--------------------------------------------------Live Music / Cabaret BH--------------------------------------------------------------Bath House BK----------------------------------Adult Book, Booth & Video Store FC-------------------------------------------------------------Fitness Club