scope week nine
The Captain’s Corner Mid-Sem has now vanished from the horizon, and it’s onwards towards the dread finals. For Law students, that template you should have started weeks ago sits empty on the desktop, and for the rest your notes are probably strewn through your room. Things look grim, but don’t despair, if you’ve made it this far it’s all upwards from here. To take you away from the hum-drum of study, there’s plenty packed into this week to make the burden that much easier. For those of you who haven’t quite let go of the childhood gone past, the Drama Society is hosting the Triwizard Tournament. If you have the courage of a lion, and the liver to match, this will be for you. And don’t forget to get down to Don’s to enjoy the culmination of this week long event. For those of you with an enjoyment of the finer things in life the x event hosted by BBIAS with BUFEC ‘Classy of F••k’ will be an excellent event to find your next favourite tipple. With only fine craft beers, french wine and Champagne, if you enjoy anything more than the goonsack this will be the event for you, and as it’s before Thursday @ Don’s, what better way to loosen up before the main event. For you intellectual types the great dissenter, Michael Kirby, is at Bond this Thursday to host a few big events; chiefly, the Miscarriage of Justice Moot, and the Great Animal Welfare Debate. Come down to watch them and listen to him speak. It’ll be a great way to get around those whove slaved through this week to get to the finals. Concluding the week will be a trip to the lost city of Atlantis. Throw on your whites, polish the charm, and for those with tickets, don’t forget to take the sea-sickness tablets before you set sail to the loosest night of the trimester so far. While this week is packed tight, don’t forget to find an odd hour or two to study. Enjoy the week, and keep it classy, Jeffers
Mister Vice-President (Recreation) Welcome to Week 9 my fellow Bondie buddies! I hope you’ve all found some well-deserved time over the weekend to relax after a week full of nonstop studying, exams and events! I’d like to take this opportunity to thank all of those who were involved in the organization and participation of our Don’s Tavern of Terror Mid-Semester Halloween Bash - last Thursday evening. I must say, the effort and creativity invested into certain costumes and make-up was impressive! This is the Bond spirit that we appreciate and continue to encourage! For updates on events, photos and all other on/off campus activities, be sure to like our Facebook pages at: Bond University Student Association: https://www.facebook.com/Bond.BUSA Bond Sport & Recreation: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Bond-Sport-Recreation/218072054884811 Bond Scope Magazine: https://www.facebook.com/scope.bond Bond University Don’s Tavern: https://www.facebook.com/BondUniversityDonsTavern The Recreation Pod saw a temporary change of venue with Wednesday By The Water at the HSM rooftop in conjunction with the Bond University French Enthusiasts Club (BUFEC) and MEDSOC, for their health and medicine week. The day also consisted of entertainment from our very own talented musicians, Zoe, Courtney and Ben. Wednesday By The Water continues to attract and engage with a variety of students from all faculties, cultures and degrees. If you’re interested in performing or having your club, association or event in conjunction with WBTW, please feel free to contact Anna Lane directly on: <anna.lane@student.bond.edu.au>. Last week, provisional club Bond Food Association proved to hold a successful officiating ceremony consisting of cuisines from all over the world. Michelle, the Cultural Clubs and Societies Director continues to work toward the organization of Executive Drinks later on this semester along with assisting and mentoring clubs such as: Bond Food Association, Chinese Students’ Association, Indian Students Association, Bond Salsa Club, and the Muslim Students Association. For all inquiries regarding the start-up of a new club or more information on the activities of the Cultural Clubs and Societies Director, please feel free to contact Michelle Pham directly on: <michelle.pham@student.bond.edu.au>. It is important that all students are aware that Don’s Tavern is open 24/7 to students. We encourage you all to take full advantage and utilise this space. For students running an event and require BUSA equipment, these forms can be found online on the BUSA website at <http://www.busa.com.au/busa/resources/category/clubs>. For approval, these forms need to be signed by Social Director Alex or myself. This week at Don’s on Thursday evening from 5:00pm - we’ll see a Bond first, the ‘Classy as @#$%!’ event held by the Bond British Isles Appreciation Society (BBIAS), in conjunction with BUFEC. We will see the finest in crafted beers and French wine tasting with tickets at only $10 per person! These can be purchased under the arch this week from 10am Monday-Wednesday. Places are limited so get in quick! For all other inquiries about booking Don’s or more information on the activities of the Social Director, please feel free to contact Alex Kinloch directly on: <alexander.kinloch@student.bond.edu.au>. In preparation for Bondstock 2014, I will be soon to release a call-out to all students interested in becoming apart of the committee for 2013/2014. This will be an opportunity for students to be involved in aspects of events management, corporate relations, multi-media and design, sports, entertainment, hospitality and so on! If you’re full of innovative ideas and creativity or have networks/contacts within the industry, I’d like to hear from you! If you’re a business owner and would like the opportunity to have worldwide exposure, I’d like to hear from you! If you’re a passionate Bondie who loves to meet new people and learn about different cultures and traditions, I’d like to hear from you! If you’re willing to make this Bondstock potentially the greatest one yet, I WANT YOU!!! For all other inquiries regarding the activities of the Recreation Pod or Bondstock 2014, please feel free to contact me directly on: <ben.thangkam@ student.bond.edu.au> Time is money. Carpe diem. Have a great week! Ben Thangkam
content 06
09
Racism
Boat People
11
14
Multiculturalism
Photos
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16
Bondy Life
Bondy Banter
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The Scoop
scope Editorial
23 Sport
James Jeffree Editor Sowmya Ram Features Editor Nick McLean Bondy Banter Andrew Wilson Bond Life David Simmons Scoop Editor Rizal Redzuan Sport Editor Bridie O’Sullivan What’s On
Team Hal Quin Features Elin Jonsson Features Justine Landis-Hanley Bond Life Antony Scholefield Scoop Nicholas O’Hara-Boyd Scoop Teagan Ridley Sport
Photography Ben Thangkam, James Mulholland
26
What’s On
The views expressed in Scope are not necassarily the views of BUSA or the editorial sub-committee. © Bond University Student Association 2013
Is Australia really racist?
by Sowmya Ram The dispute starts from the very fundamental definition of racism. By definition racism is the belief that all members of each race possess characteristics, abilities, or qualities specific to that race, especially so as to distinguish it as inferior or superior to another race or races. By this very definition every one of us is racist one way or another. Type “Racism” into Google and one of the top suggestions is Racism in Australia. We can’t help but wonder why it is so. Surely the definition of racism is flawed. Every human on earth thinks his/her race is superior. This is called being proud, not racist. The problem here lies in the expression of this pride.
Of course, any discussion about racism in Australia will inevitably veer towards a discussion of Australia’s past. Being a country founded by colonialism, racism was in one form or another part of the foundation on which the country was built. When Australia was claimed by the British in the 1770s, it was legally considered “terra nullius”, or “land belonging to no-one”. This was convenient for claiming land without having to go through the land laws that Europeans acknowledged at the time. But it also obviously ignored -by lower
estimates- the roughly 300 thousand Indigenous people living on the Australian mainland at the time. Anyone with even a very loose understanding of history would acknowledge that the next 200-plus years would be horrific for Aboriginals. Colonial expansion would see them forced into land reserves or missions, the conditions of which facilitated the spread of smallpox and the collapse of entire communities. On a theoretical level, all of this could be justified by the belief that Aboriginals were “sub-human”. After the publication of Darwin’s “On the Origin of Species” in 1859, for instance, it was argued by anthropologists that Aboriginals were a “missing link” in the evolutionary chain between apes and humans. These beliefs were the natural predecessors of the government policies that would see thousands of Aboriginal children forcibly removed from their homes by state governments as part of the Stolen Generation. The list of bad things that have happened to Aboriginals is too long to print.
Most Australians will be familiar with this aspect of Australian history. More recent commentary has tended to focus on the glacial pace at which Australia sheds
its colonial-era racism. Aboriginals only received the right to vote in federal elections confirmed in 1949, although Queensland and Western Australia only acknowledged their right to vote in the 60s. Aboriginals officially became citizens of Australia in 1949, and were only officially counted in the population following a 1967 referendum. The Stolen Generation practices only completely ended in the early 70s. In 1975, the nationally-passed Racial Discrimination Act made racially-based selection policies illegal.
the Cronulla race riots and by American commentators after the “blackface” incident on Hey Hey It’s Saturday in 2009.
There still is a lot being done against race discrimination, one excellent example is the ‘Racism. It stops with me’ campaign started by the Australian Human Rights Commission. Sports bodies such as the AFL Players Association,
A lot of the beliefs that perpetuated that kind of racism go hand in hand with racism that extended beyond Australia’s shores. In the 19th and early 20th century, Queensland’s sugar cane industry and farms famously “black birded” Melanesian workers and Cape York Aboriginals, to effectively work as slaves on plantations. Arguably Australia’s most famous racist policy was the White Australia policy, which comprised a series of legislation that favoured migration of Europeans to Australia over other ethnicities. The fact that it only officially ended in the 70s was focused on during the international attention Australia received in 2005 during
Australian Rugby Union, Golf Australia and Basketball Australia are on board with the campaign, as is a large number of regional and city councils including the Greater Dandenong City Council, the City of Ballarat, the City of Perth and the City of Port Adelaide.
Although, over one in 20 Australians say they have been physically attacked because of their race, and one in five Australians say they have experienced race-hate talk such as verbal abuse or racial insults. More than ever, Australians recognise that racism undermines social harmony and cohesion.
At the same time, the World Values Survey shows Australia is one of the most tolerant countries in the world. The survey asked individuals what types of people they would refuse to live next to, and counted how many chose the option ‘people of a different race’ as a percentage for each countr THE MOST TOLERANT COUNTRIES 0 to 4.9% United States, Canada, Brazil, Argentina, Colombia, Guatemala, Britain, Sweden, Norway, Latvia, Australia, New Zealand 5 - 9.9% Chile, Peru, Mexico, Spain, Germany, Belgium, Belarus, Croatia, Japan, Pakistan, South Africa 10 - 14.9% Finland, Poland, Ukraine, Italy, Greece, Czech Republic, Slovakia 15 - 19.9% Venezuela, Hungary, Serbia, Romania, Macedonia, Ethiopia, Uganda, Tanzania, Zimbabwe, Russia, China Source: World Values Survey
However, SBS reports one out of ten Australians have racist tendencies. About 11 per cent of Australians report they have been excluded from workplaces or social activities based on their racial background, and more than one in 20 Australians say they have been physically attacked because of their race. Also, recent videos capturing racist abuse on public transport in Melbourne and Sydney have caused a stir across the Australian media. The Easter Saturday abuse of a Korean student and his aunt on a Sydney bus this year, captured on video, is the third recent example of a racist attack on Australian public transport that has made headlines. It follows on from Mike Nayna’s video of a xenophobic attack on two French women in Melbourne last November, and the abuse of ABC news presenter Jeremy Fernandez on a Sydney bus earlier this year.
But what about recording these incidents? Yes it’s a kind of intervention, and it ends up creating a public conversation about racism. The main question posed by these attacks is how Australia has become a country where racist behaviour is accepted by many and where attacks on minorities are ordinary. Perhaps then, it’s surprising how much outrage and publicity these videos get, as if people are watching something unprecedented. The future of racism certainly has a lot to do with the media. With the evolution in mass/social media and increasing access to cameras (thank you mobile phones), the tiniest unrest gets blown up into a hot air balloon for the whole world to debate and gossip about. When people of two different races fight for totally non-racist reason, the first speculation is - It’s visible, it’s obvious, it’s racism. Instantly filmed and shared for millions to see. No one cares about why the incident happened, when it finally is explained. Too late – the damage is already done. For some it’s their chance at 5 minutes to fame, for others it’s a moment of sensationalism that makes them feel important. The amount of attention these stories get is sickening at one point. Racism is to be strongly condemned. Racial violence is not at all a joke. Where is the line between racist remarks at home and racial discrimination in public? Jumping to racism as a natural conclusion does not apply in most cases. It’s time the definition of racism got revised. Yes, Australians are racist. And so are Chinese, French, Americans, Indians, Brazilians and New Caledonians. No country has overcome the problem of racism, and it is unlikely that it will ever be completely eradicated in this country or any other. The real question, however, is whether we simply shrug our shoulders and say, ‘’Well, we may be racist, but so is everyone else’’, or do we take it upon ourselves, as a nation that has already made great strides in reducing racism, to keep up the fight to make Australia less racist. We have the ways and means to keep raising our standards, and that potential is uniquely Australian.
Everything you wanted to know about ‘Boat People’ but were afraid to ask… by Hal Quin
If you’ve paid any attention to your television, radio, the Internet, social media, newspapers, magazines, billboards or basic human interaction, you’ll have heard the term “boat people”. It’s the literal definition of a political issue, a term that both sides of politics have used to alternatively sell their own policies and beat the policies of the other side senseless. Extremists at both ends of the political spectrum will tell you that it encapsulates everything that’s wrong with Australia, although both for completely different reasons. And like all good contentious political issues, it has various competing sets of facts. So, for the sake of completion here is everything you wanted to know about boat people…but were too afraid to ask.
and were refused. The incident had elements all the complex political wrangling that go on today, and gave rise to the “Pacific Solution”, whereby asylum seekers were processed in Nauru before being transferred to the Australian mainland. The key reason was that Nauru was outside of Australian waters, thereby making sure that only genuine refugees were allowed to make their way into Australian territory.
So, what is a “boat person” anyway? The term “boat person” used to be normally used to described refugees from Vietnam, Cambodia and Laos who fled by boat from Vietnam. During the 70s, Australia took about 137 thousand of these people as refugees. In the 90s, the term came to refer to people who attempted to enter into Australia as refugees.
However, in July 2013 then-Prime Minister Kevin Rudd implemented a policy that would see asylum seekers arriving by boat transferred to Papua New Guinea to be processed. Even if they were found to be “genuine refugees”, they would be resettled in Papua New Guinea instead of in Australia. One of the aims of the policy was to dissuade refugees from attempting to enter Australia by boat.
Is that still what happens? Well, sort of. Go to the section below to see what the current policy is. The Nauru detention centre was closed in 2007. Prior to 2013, there were 8 detention centres on the Australian mainland where refugees would be processed, as well as a detention centre on Christmas Island.
So this has been happening for a while? Yes, although arguably the era of Australian refugee policy that we’re currently in started with So, what is a “genuine refugee”? the Tampa incident. There, a Norwegian freighter The United Nations “Convention relating to the carrying a group of 438 refugees from a distressed Status of Refugees” defines a refugee as a person fishing vessel attempted to land at Christmas Island who is unable or unwilling to return to their
country of citizenship due to a legitimate fear of being persecuted for reasons to do with their race, religion, nationality, membership of a particular social group or political opinion. An “asylum seeker” is a person who is seeking this status. When someone is processed in a detention centre, the Department of Immigration and Citizenship is assessing whether or not they meet the Refugee Convention’s definition of a refugee. However, under the 2013 refugee laws, anyone who arrives anywhere in Australia by boat must be removed from Australian territory to be processed, and would be processed under the laws of the country they are sent to.
So, what’s the controversy then? On the one side there are people who claim that Australia has an international obligation under the international Refugee Convention to accept and process asylum seekers, and that taking them offshore to process them and refusing to settle them in Australia is breaching that obligation. There is also an argument that the issue is being overblown: Australia accepts about 3% of refugees internationally and accepted 200 thousand legitimate immigrants in 2012, a number much bigger than those that arrive by boat.
On the other side, there is the argument that those who arrive by boat are “jumping the queue” and taking the place of refugees awaiting resettlement So, how many refugees arrive by boat? in a refugee camp. More broadly, there are concerns In 2011-12, Australia accepted applications for about Australia only being able to support so many 7, 036 refugees who didn’t arrive by boat, and 7, people and “opening the floodgates” to illegal 379 who did, for a total of 14415. According to a migrants. 2010-11 study, the majority of refugees arriving in this manner were from Iraq, Burma, Afghanistan, Bhutan or the Congo. Tony Abbott said he would “stop the boats” and he’s Prime Minister now. What’s his plan? The percentage of boat arrivals who are genuine Tony Abbott’s policy focuses more on stopping refugees has varied from year to year, but overall the “people smuggling” trade allows boat people the figures seem to show that the majority of people to arrive in Australia, and phrases the issue as seeking refugee status by boat are granted refugee one of national security. “Operation Sovereign visas. Of the 1637 people who were detained on Borders”, headed by a 3 star military commander either Nauru or Manus Island between 2001 and reports to the immigration minister directly. The 2008, 70 per cent were found to be refugees. In policy will see any boats that arrive turned back to 2011-12, the percentage was 91%. their country of origin, and any boats that arrive to Papua New Guinea or Nauru. The policy is still being implemented and both sides are arguing over its success though, so watch this space.
Jimbelunga - encouraging multiculturalism by Elin Jonsson
Jimbelunga nursing centre was established in 1994, to For this year’s NAIDOC week, she helped the Multimeprovide an extensive range of aged health care and sup- dia and Citizen Journalism students find suitable places to port services and meet the cultural and spiritual needs of visit for the content of their stories. Aboriginals and Torres Strait Islanders. With NAIDOC approaching at the time of my visit to JimEven though the centre was originally for Indigenous peo- belunga nursing centre, preparations were in full swing. ple, it’s now known for welcoming people in need from all cultures, with a vision to provide the best practice and cul- Clinical Nurse Manager Renee Cole is one staff member turally appropriate quality care for all residents; effective who plans the centre’s NAIDOC celebrations. management of all clinical, administration and operational activities of Jimbelunga; as well as promote Jimbelunga as “We do all sorts of activities, it’s very dependent on the a home for high quality and holistic nursing that is neces- residents’ interests and needs,” she said. sary in aged care. “And coming around to NAIDOC week and things like Centre Manager Stan Kramer highlights the importance of that, we do spend more time looking at Aboriginal apthe meanings of the centre’s heritage. propriate artwork, so the residents have been working on some paintings for our celebrations.” “What happened was, back in the 70’s to 80’s, a lot of the Indigenous people were homeless, and a group of people On the day of the celebrations, they start off at 10am outgot together and identified that Indigenous people needed side, enjoying the hopefully good weather and singing a place specific to them,” he said. from the performers coming to Jimbelunga, as well as some underground cooking. “They approached the government, and that’s how Jimbelunga came to be formed.” Activities Officer Tamara Hobden has been helping them all prepare for the day of the events. Today, one of those group members lives at the centre. “We have traditional dancers that come in and do dances Last semester, Multimedia and Citizen Journalism stu- for us- it’s just a big party day, it really is,” she said. dents teamed with ABC Open producer Solua Middleton to produce content for NAIDOC week and get published “We invite the families in to come and celebrate the week on the local ABC website, with the audio component air- with us and they love it, they look forward to it every sining on ABC Extra Digital Radio. gle year.” Solua Middleton is an experienced print and television journalist from the Torres Strait Islands. She has worked as a journalist and photographer for the Koori Mail Newspaper as well as a producer and video journalist for the NITV National News team. She established the monthly Indigenous newspaper for the Gold Coast called ’Be Counted’, aspiring to contribute and make a difference to her community. In 2005, Solua won the Henry Mayer Media Prize for a story she wrote on child abuse in a Queensland community and has been a sought after speaker and facilitator at a range international media conferences.
NAIDOC week is all about honouring the centre’s heritage, including all staff, residents and their relatives. Apart from Indigenous residents, people from Germany, Papa New Guinea and the Netherlands also reside here. Future hopes and plans for the centre is for it to expand on the neighbouring tribal land, hopefully by securing funding from external resources which would help it keep up to date with other nursing homes.
week nine Photographer: Ben Thangkam|James Mulholland |Sowmya Ram Events: BASIC Memberâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Night | Blues Awards | Mid-Sem Bash
bondy life Another week at Bond by Andrew Wilson
Miss Bond While you’ve all been out to play, Miss Bond’s been hard at work rummaging through the dirt.
My little young ones how are you all? How are those hangovers? Now before we get started with that gos-
A Halloween theme, nine-hundred other Bondies had the opportunity to kick back after a hard week of examinations; it was no wonder that close to a thousand Bondies packed Don’s Tavern last Thursday for the Mid Semester Bash. With typical exuberance, students threw themselves into the theme, attempting to be different from last week’s Physical Comicon. Once more, costume shops on the coast as well as online retailers, experienced a flurry of sales as Bondies splashed out on face paint and props in order to look their scariest.
But it was not just Bondies that made up the numbers on Thursday; after the announcement of Mashd N Kutcher headlining the event, many external partygoers brought themselves to Don’s to see the renowned mashup DJ’s spin their decks. And they certainly did not disappoint! The dance floor was packed during the night, and I do not think I was the only one that was lifted onto another’s shoulders to fist pump above the crowd.
sip you’re all chasing, let’s talk about that skirt you boys have been chasing… or lack thereof… in terms of material that is. But there were exceptions… the lovely ZK, you looked stunning girl!
Now a little bit of sporting news, accusations of bribes are as common as the bottles of wine sculled at Blues awards. But well done to the netty girls, those short skirts paid off #fuckthetouchclub.
Except for Greeny – HB mate! BASCIALLY you shouldn’t be able to remember it! You know what
The after party at Vanity Nightclub in Surfers Paradise saw a good turnout of students who packed the booths. else we’ve heard? That BASIC has competition, a DJ Jake Carmody played a great set once again, which ‘classy’ event this Thursday… I’m not biased tothe crowd responded well to as usual.
The Mid Semester Bash however was not the only event wards my fellow beer appreciators but they’re bigger of the week. BASIC threw its members night at CBD than you in both popularity and executive girth… so tavern Varsity Lakes on Tuesday night. All members, enjoyed the infamous VIP benefits that BASIC members careful who you go slagging BASIC off to. have become accustomed to. This night was another great success on the Bond calendar with many turning up to the event. Bondie Dj Kinloch had the dance floor packed with trap mixes. All in all, week 7 proved to be a big week for semester Speaking of weirdness and BUSA, Oi Mr VP of 133, as students now look forwards to their end of semester exams and the study that needs to be done Recreation! DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW TO for them. PARTY?! Or is that why you have a social director?
Because we heard you haven’t graced the bond-vomit glazed paths of Surfers.
bondy banter Now on to another popular topic on the grapevine: our favourite moustache man -Boy you could do so
DR
ond
much better. Dear Dr Bond,
Now I have to leave you as we have a big night of sinning ahead, for the Anti-Christ’s birthday #hesurvivedto25. There you go #kristobitch, two mentions in two weeks, that’s all your birthday gifts and wishes until you hit half a century.
All I want from a future partner is someone to lay in bed with and sip hot chocolate when the rain is pouring outside, someone to stand by my side through the good times and the bad, someone to spend the rest of my life with. Is this so much to ask? – Mr. Nice Guy A: Dear Mr Nice Guy, when you find her, ask if she has a friend; we can go on a double date and utilize our senior discounts.
But to all my little minions gracing the paths of Cav-
Dear Dr Bond,
ille, careful creepers. Keep it clean and classy, I’ll see you on that pristine white ship.
I have recently been spending a lot of time with two of my closest guy friends; I know it’s wrong but I can’t help being a serial flirt, constantly dropping suggestive hints and just generally stringing them along for the ride – Little Miss Tease
Bond voyage my lovelies.
A: Dear LMT, don’t start what you won’t finish. Dear Dr Bond,
xoxo Miss Bond
P.S. any tantalising tales can be sent to scope.missbond@gmail.com and the sordid details may grace my pages next week.
Recently, a younger stallion has been seen trotting through my community paddocks, after escaping a neglectful owner; he’s a cheeky foal with a long blonde mane and a wistful gaze. My query then, is this: considering he now runs free, how do I tame him and bring him into my stables? - The Ranch Owner A: Dear Ranch Owner, I would just to remind you that Doctor Bond is not a medical, nor vetinery, doctor. However, I have extensive experience in helping others tame young studs. My advice is simple – lure him in with treats, then once you have isolated the animal, you must bend him to your will until such time that he can be safely released into your domestic herd.
the scoop
The Undateables by Nicholas O’Hara-Boyd Perhaps as a kid who’s grown up passing notes to girls under tables, madly lusting after smoky-eyed blondes whose tongues are destined to explore deep inside the throats of every other tattooed asshole in the club, and self-sabotaging with the playing hard to get mentality when it’s suddenly smooth sailing in the Bermuda, the most liberating thing to find is someone who’s astute and audacious enough to admit they just want to be loved. Not from behind Buddy Holly shades, not through a cutting turn of phrase, or in an endeavour to harvest pity texts at 2am – I’m talking about the unequivocal declaration that they have love to give and fantasise of winning it back. That, it would seem, is so rare to come across in this universal soul mate search that when, last week, I was hit with it by an off-hand comment during ABC2’s The Undateables, my eyes glazed and skin chilled. Honesty offered without riddle is one of the most powerful tools at our disposal, and one of the last we recognise as having any practical merit. The Undateables is a British reality program about folk with physical and mental health disabilities getting into the dating game. Their disorders range from Tourette’s to Asperger’s to Down syndrome. By its very nature,
the program’s as funny as it is heart-warming. Dating’s awkward at the best of times, let alone when the fellow you’re dating shouts out “fucking slut!” whenever he’s turned on, or when the woman you’re attempting to woo has such severe OCD she can’t bear you being within a metre-and-a-half of her.
A little while ago I read a publication by Geoffrey Miller called The Mating Mind. He suggests that, throughout evolution, humans, males especially, have developed a certain set of skills to attract a mate. Like a peacock’s deliciously elegant and feathery plumage, it’s something non-essential for survival – we don’t need it to eat or procreate; its sole purpose is to impress potential suitors. Miller suggests that, for us homo sapiens, this advanced mechanism is our wit, humour, artistic and articulate sensibilities. A collection of characters born without an ability to draw on these forms of love artillery makes for essential viewing. The Undateables screens on ABC2 Wednesdays from 8.30pm. It’ll melt your soul.
Fall Out Boy - Gig Review The last time Fall Out Boy appeared in Brisbane they were playing their last gig – a fact completely unknown to everyone in the audience and perhaps even the band themselves. When Fall Out Boy went on a hiatus late 2009 I remember a 14-year-old version of me feeling as if everything was over. The era of feeling sad about mostly nothing, and having a sweeping front fringe the envy of every other teenager, had to come to an end. That night I whispered, “believers never die”, before I reluctantly fell asleep. Of course, in the years following the apparent death of Fall Out Boy there was a serious decline in the popularity of emo, replaced by the new trend of the hipster. So earlier this year, when Fall Out Boy released a brand new song and video, a day after frontman Pete Wentz dispelled rumours of the band getting back together, all the scene kids rejoiced; their heroes had risen again. The show at The Brisbane Convention Centre was very professional. Though a bit older than they were back in ‘09, Patrick, Pete, Joe and Andy were every bit as energetic and excited to play for a crowd of allsorts as they were in the golden days. Opening with one of the biggest anthems off their latest release Save Rock And Roll, ‘The Phoenix’, the band whipped the crowd into an absolute frenzy. Stepping out in balaclavas with the band’s logo etched into the fabric, the quartet looked as if they were spurring a revolution. They waved giant FOB flags as they got the crowd to chant, “Put on your war paint!” They progressed through their catalogue of hits such as ‘Sugar We’re Going Down’ and ‘This Aint A Scene It’s A Goddamn Arms Race’ to the joy of the crowd. Songs off their new album were also crowd pleasers. A personal highlight was during ‘Young Volcanoes’, when giant black balloons were released from the ceiling to be bounced around the crowd during the anthem. A short acoustic set was a magical moment on the night. ‘Me & You’ went from pop-punk ballad to a pretty love song just by adding an acoustic guitar, and ‘Grand Theft Autumn’, a hit off their Take This To Your Grave album, was a real throwback to the old days of FOB. The greatest message on the night was during one of Pete Wentz’s spoken interludes. “Sometimes it’s important to look up and see someone who’s a freak, just like you.” And whilst I may have grown up since those crazy days of 2009, I know the insecure, confused 14-year-old in me would’ve held onto those words with vehement passion.
REVIEW
by Antony Scholefield It’s ironic that “alternative” music often gets consistent For an album of candyfloss pop, Prism is a teenage balreviews, while straightforward pop divides people. Prism
ladeer’s dream. Forget ‘Unconditionally’, another likely
is proof: while the all-hating hipsters sharpen their pitch-
single, which is overblown. Forget the sickeningly twee
forks, the hive-minded fangirls are fainting with admira-
‘Double Rainbow’. Check out album X-factor ‘Spiritual’,
tion. I usually sit on the fence. I’ve been doing that so
closer ‘Choose Your Battles’, and the Sia-penned ‘It Takes
long, however, I’ve got a crease in my arse the size of the
Two’. They’re catchy yet vulnerable, gooey yet lovable;
Marina Trench. So today I’ll commit.
they’re proof that Katy has talents beyond getting her
Prism’s predecessor, Teenage Dream, spawned five num-
cleavage on camera.
ber one singles. Prism won’t match that. Aside from ‘Roar’ I’ll upset the fangirls by saying that Prism isn’t Katy’s - which needs no description, it’s bloody everywhere - the
album. Songwriters made the lyrics; producers made the
most obvious single is ‘This Is How We Do’. It’s shit. The music. Anyone could’ve sung it. I’ll also upset the hipsters alternative, ‘Birthday’, is marginally better. Also, I’m ex-
by saying that it’s still good. The potential singles aren’t
cited for Katy’s video, given the lyrics “Let me get you
Dream-level, but the album tracks are great, and constitute
in your birthday suit” / “It’s time to bring out the big bal-
70% of the record. Give another 10% because the shitty
loons”.
songs will still chart, and that’s a distinction. Kudos to
Before the fangirls kill me with baseball bats, a la the ‘Hot Katy; I’ve fallen on the fangirl side of the fence. N’ Cold’ video, I’ll explain that other potential singles ‘Walking on Air’, ‘Legendary Lovers’, ‘Dark Horse’ - are
Rating: 8/10
much better. Ethereal, exotic and moody, in that order,
Top Track: ‘Spiritual’
they’re different enough to demand attention, without entering Gaga territory. ‘Ghost’ and ‘Love Me’ combine fascinating little beats with tender vocals, and foreshadow an exciting tone shift.
VOX POPS James Fitchett
Favourite song: I’ve Just Seen a Face by The Beatles Favourite artist: Alex Turner. The guy just relates to my ear drums Guilty pleasure: Whole lotta porno Favourite book: Happy Slapped by a Jellyfish written by the wisest man with a head like an orange, Karl Pilkington Favourite Movie: Annie Hall Always cry watching: The mirror Celebrity crush: Chloe Grace Moretz... she’s 18 now, right? Most hated artist: The ‘artists’ that just put up a blank canvas in a gallery and call it ‘art’. Get off your ass and do some work. Would have sex to: Become eligible for the government’s child allowance scheme Roz McFarlan Favourite song: Rock the House, Afrojack Favourite artist: Avicii Guilty pleasure: Real Housewives Favourite book: To Kill a Mocking Bird Favourite movie: Kill Bill 1 Always cry watching: Crash Celebrity crush: Lil Wayne Most hated artist: Ke$ha Would have sex to: Old school Usher
Morgan Lipchitz Favourite song: Love Cats Favourite artist: Salvador Dali Guilty pleasure: Singing when I don’t know the lyrics Favourite book: The Sun Also Rises Favourite movie: Cool Hand Luke Always cry watching: Click Celebrity crush: The Olsen twins Most hated artist: Paris Hilton Would have sex to: Silence
WHAT’S ON THIS WEEK: SEE: Catch famed comedian Steady Eddie in the basement at the Gold Coast Arts Centre this Friday at 8:00pm. The space opens at 6:30pm with a fully stocked bar. After the show, the place stays open until 12:00am with karaoke and tapas platters.
Photograph: By Duong Dang
DO: Head to Marina Mirage this Saturday
MY NECK OF THE WOODS: Clothing Well, it’s official. The Gold Coast has officially skipped Spring and taken up its love affair with Summer, submerging our city in a sub-tropical haze of humidity. The air is so thick with heat you could practically swim in it. And we do what we locals do best: shed our overcoats, kick off our converse, and take the to the beach in as little clothing as humanly possible to soak up the sun. But if the beach isn’t your thing (sand is the glitter of the natural world) you may want a little more coverage on campus than what Speedo has to offer. Sure, Robina Town Centre and Pacific Fair are awesome (food courts and airconditioning are as great a match as peanut butter and chocolate), but if you want to indulge in unique pieces and support local business at the same time, check out these four independent fashion shops on the Gold Coast.
1. Craveyard
This place is for the dark, edgy and quirky at heart. Craveyard endeavours to satisfy your cravings for clothing that thrills. Think high waisted skirts, sleeveless skull-printed shirts, leather overall dresses and ripped denim. This place also stocks some equally awesome men’s clothing, including some seriously sweet vintage print high-collar tees and hipster backpacks. With brands like Minty Meets Munt, Evil Twin, All About Eve, Komono and Thrills, you’re bound to find something here to drive your campus fiend’s a little bit cray. Even if you don’t, the shop’s interior featuring bulb lighting, cement slick floors and oversized black writing on the walls, is enough incentive to pop down to Palm Beach and check it out. Shop 3/1166, 7th Avenue, Palm Beach QLD 4221.
morning between 7am-11am to indulge in the Farmer’s Market. Check out the prawn station for the freshest seafood, as well as the lovely people who make and sell their own bratwurst, or the father and his little kid who roll and stuff middle-eastern pastries as you order.
EAT: After the Farmer’s Market, pop by the grourmet deli/ restaurant Providore in Marina Mirage to feast on the most delicious salads and down-to-earth dishes.
2. Coin Laundry
“B***ches be tripping”. That is the DP of The Coin Laundry’s Facebook page, a freaking fierce fashion boutique located in none other than James Street, the indie fashion capital of the Coast. A true advocator of Lady Gag’s ‘Born this Way’ motif, this shop is a total free spirit. Stocking brands like Motel, Brixton, Staple, Chaser and Dime, this store is for the wild at heart. Shop 2/25 James St. Burleigh Heads, QLD, 4220.
3. Free People
If you daydream about lying in open meadow, draped in white lace, braiding daisy chains and eating the fresh cheese made that morning from the milk of your baby goat named Delilah, than Free People is the brand for you. Sure, it’s an international brand run by serious fashionista Janine Edwards with several locations throughout America, it only has one shop on the Gold Coast, located in Marina Mirage. The clothing is exclusively for women (boys, Christmas is about 1.5 months away. Hint hint) and features a gorgeous array of crocheted, lace and gathered pieces in seductively dusty bohemian hues. So, if you feel like recreating Woodstock trends this summer, head to Marina Mirage and start layering those hippie threads. 74 Seaworld Drive, Main Beach QLD 4217
4. Le Deux
Le Duex. It sounds like the fancy name of some super upmarket, chandelier-clad, look-down-their-nose-at-you-asyou-walk-in-wearing-your-cat-jumper-and-dungarees sort of place. Classy? Yes. Stuck up? Anything but! Apparently, the two lovely owners Jody and Emma spend a good deal of time in store and take the time to learn their regular’s names. Tucked away on James Street Burleigh Heads, this industrial, cement-clad space stocks an edgy array of hard-to-find brands, like House of Harlow, Low Luv X by Erin Wasson, Stolen Girlfriend’s Club, Maurie and Eve, and some sweet metal trinkets to grace your neck.
sport Sachin Tendulkar, Cricket Legend Retirement After 198 test matches, 463 One Day Internationals and 24 years of legendary cricket the Little Master calls it a day. With Diwali and all the other festivals around the corner I don’t know if its time to celebrate or be upset about him saying goodbye. But one thing is for sure, watching cricket would never be the same for me and the other millions of fans across the world after his final series. When the sun sets in Mumbai on November 18 2013 that will be Little Master’s final day in creams. It will be the end of second Test against the Windies, fittingly 200th cap, and in Sachin’s home city- the perfect finale to a stunning career. Cold hard stats are one thing but when you compare it with the other legends it has more meaning.
Looking at his career it seems that he has set up marvellous records which would take some quality cricketing skills to even reach near it. Only player to score 100 centuries, only player to score 50,000+ runs in all 3 formats and the list goes on and on. He holds just about every batting record worth owning the game. In the last 24 years everything about Sachin has changed, there has been one constant - his modesty and humility. More than his talent and his achievements on the cricket field it is his modesty that endears him to millions across the globe off it. Inherited from his father Ramesh Tendulkar, Sachin has not changed even a tiny bit over the past years in this respect. One example will demonstrate the point well. When India toured down under in 2011-12, it was extremely hot in Melbourne. With temperatures hovering around the 40-degree mark, it was really tough on the players. After rigorous practice sessions, Sachin, fully drenched, stayed back to sign 50 autographs when all his teammates had made it back to the comfort of the air-conditioned coach. When a news reporter asked him why he did so this is what he had to say, “If a signature of mine brings a smile on someone’s face I should consider myself lucky. I’d much rather bear the heat for a little more time than see someone who has been waiting patiently for three hours go home disheartened”. It won’t be wrong to say that the news for his retirement was expected for some time, but when it did come, there was a sense of numbness. Never the less even before the start of the landmark game the preparations have already begun to mark the ceremony a special one.
ABERGOWRIE Social Justice Trip, 2013 CULTURAL WELCOME EVENT Tuesday, Week 10 On August 18th, Bond Indigenous Awareness Society commenced the 4th trip to Abergowrie all-‐boys boarding school.
124/11/13 4:30pm Undergraduate Lounge
~ FREE FOOD ~
INDIGENOUS ART +
“I am grateful that I got to spend time to get to know the boys at Abergowrie and offer them career advice, tutoring and mentoring.” – Nathias Warkill
ARTEFFACT EXHIBITION
“This trip was one of the most rewarding and inspirational initiatives that I've ever taken part in. I would highly recommend anyone that ever gets the opportunity to apply.” – Ajuma Ogiji
ABORIGINAL AND TORRES STRAIT ISLANDER DANCE TROOPS COMMUNITY LEADERS INFORMATION OF FUTURE ABERGOWRIE TRIPS