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contents COMMENTARY: Why people die when we talk about gun control

by Joel Dyer

Stop missing out on what’s happening around you Stop missing out on what’s happening around you

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departments

25 34 37 39 45 46 51 53 54 56 59

7 LETTERS: Walmart in Boulder; Danish misfires; Nice art; Searching for good queso 7 THE HIGHROAD: Outlawing exposés of factory farm horrors 9 DANISH PLAN: Why would anyone need a gun or an abortion?

10 IN CASE YOU MISSED IT: Erie mayor is a fracker; Romanoff cocktail; a concert idea ADVENTURE: Dual Snowboards inch into the winter sports scene OVERTONES: El Ten Eleven’s nuanced sound ARTS AND CULTURE: A pen and paper hero at the Dairy BOULDER COUNTY EVENTS: What to do and where to go SCREEN: Holy Motors; Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters REEL TO REEL: Films showing locally FOOD REVIEW: The Parkway Cafe BOULDER COUNTY BEER TOUR: The loud table at Boulder Beer APPETIZERS: Where to get your grub ASTROLOGY: By Rob Brezsny BOULDER MARKETPLACE: Your community resource

Boulder Weekly

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letters

Publisher, Stewart Sallo Editor, Joel Dyer Director of Sales & Marketing, Hassan Evans Director of Operations/Controller, Benecia Beyer Circulation Manager, Cal Winn EDITORIAL Managing Editor, Jefferson Dodge Arts & Entertainment Editor, David Accomazzo Associate Editor/Special Editions, Elizabeth Miller Online Editor, Steve Weishampel Interns, Cayte Bosler, Abigail Faires, Stephanie Riesco Contributing Writers, Peter Alexander, Rob Brezsny, Chris Callaway, Paul Danish, James Dziezynski, Clay Fong, Jim Hightower, Dave Kirby, Jessie Lucier, P.J. Nutting, Brian Palmer, Chris Parker, Adam Perry, Alan Sculley, Tom Winter, Tate Zandstra, Gary Zeidner SALES Retail Sales Manager, Allen Carmichael Account Executives, Andrea Craven, Joe Fuchs, David Hasson, Chelsea Mack PRODUCTION Production Manager, Dave Kirby Art Director, Susan France Graphic Designer, Mark Goodman Marketing Manager & Heiress, Julia Sallo Office Manager/Advertising Assistant, Jamie Peterson CIRCULATION TEAM Dave Hastie, Dan Hill, George LaRoe, Jeffrey Lohrius, Elizabeth Ouslie, Rick Slama 13-Year-Old, Mia Rose Sallo February 7, 2013 Volume XX, Number 27 As Boulder County's only independently owned newspaper, Boulder Weekly is dedicated to illuminating truth, advancing justice and protecting the First Amendment through ethical, no-holdsbarred journalism and thought-provoking opinion writing. Free every Thursday since 1993, the Weekly also offers the county's most comprehensive arts and entertainment coverage. Read the print version, or visit www.boulderweekly.com. Boulder Weekly does not accept unsolicited editorial submissions. If you're interested in writing for the paper, please send queries to: editorial@boulderweekly.com. Any materials sent to Boulder Weekly become the property of the newspaper.

690 South Lashley Lane, Boulder, CO, 80305 p 303.494.5511 f 303.494.2585 editorial@boulderweekly.com www.boulderweekly.com Printed on 100% recycled paper with soy-based ink.

Boulder Weekly is published every Thursday. No portion may be reproduced in any form without written permission from the publisher. © 2013 Boulder Weekly, Inc., all rights reserved. cover photo: Susan France. Thanks to Theatrical Costumes Etc., Into the Wind, Dual Snow Boards and Fascinations for the use of cover props.

Boulder Weekly welcomes your correspondence via email (letters@ boulderweekly.com) or the comments section of our website at www.boulderweekly.com.

Preference will be given to short letters (under 300 words) that deal with recent stories or local issues, and letters may be edited for style, length and libel.

Letters should include your name, address and telephone number for verification. We do not publish anonymous letters or those signed with pseudonyms. Letters become the property of Boulder Weekly and will be published on our website.

Boulder Weekly

Walmart in Boulder

I just read an article in ICUMI about Walmart. (“Should Walmart come to Boulder?” Jan. 31.) Here’s my two cents: A few years ago our family traveled through small towns in the Southeastern states for three weeks. We found it was very easy to figure out if there was a Walmart in town: the smaller strip centers and small freestanding businesses were closed in all of the towns where there was a Walmart,

the

Highroad

without fail. And we figured this out without doing any “research.” I could beat the drum harder, but I think we all know what will happen over the next few years with the arrival of this bigbox chain in Boulder.

Mindy Mullen/Boulder County Well, the cat has finally allowed the bag to be removed from around it, and we now see it’s Walmart.

On Jan. 21, four months after we

chickens and other pastoral creatures into torturously tiny cages enclosed in metal, prisonlike buildings. The animals never see the light of day, they’re routinely dosed with antibiotics and growth hormones, and they are frequently ravaged by epidemic diseases.

In turn, we human animals suffer from widespread salmonella, E. coli and other food contaminants that are an inevitable by-product of CAFO production, as well as suffering from the gross air and water pollution caused by the unbelievable mass of manure coming out of these animal factories.

It’s ugly in there, but such a reckless system produces big corporate profits, so they want to keep the uglies a secret from consumers. Problem is, in this age of watchdogs and whistleblowers with cellphone cameras and direct access to the

Outlawing exposés of factory farm horrors

by Jim Hightower

B

ig Ag has a big problem — but it’s come up with a neat solution.

The problem is that the meat, eggs and dairy that are marketed to us as “wholesome” foodstuffs by such giants as Tyson, Smithfield and Borden are actually produced in mammoth, mega-messy, monstrous factory farms. Known by the baleful industrial acronym CAFO, these Confined Animal Feeding Operations amount to animal concentration camps.

They cram thousands of cows, pigs,

learned development plans were in the works, the company was still a “mystery grocer” creeping ever closer to obtaining the city’s permission to operate in Diagonal Plaza. Even though evidence from various sources pointed clearly toward the identity of the unnamed tenant, Boulder officials claimed they were still in the dark on the matter. But by the next day, city planning departsee LETTERS Page 9

For more information on Jim Hightower’s work — and to subscribe to his award-winning monthly newsletter, The Hightower Lowdown — visit www.jimhightower.com.

public through YouTube, there’s been a spate of barf-inducing exposés. But, problem solved: Big Ag’s lawyers and lobbyists have simply coughed up a nasty legalistic hairball called the “Animal and Ecological Terrorism Act.” Yes, it’s an “Ag-Gag” bill that criminalizes use of cameras to expose the horrors inside CAFOs and prosecutes participants as terrorists.

You’d think such a repressive act would gag a legislature, but Iowa, Missouri and Utah have already passed it, and at least 10 other states are considering it. To keep up and fight back, go to www.organicconsumers.org.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com This opinion column does not necessarily reflect the views of Boulder Weekly.

February 7, 2013 7

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danish plan Why would anyone need a gun or an abortion?

by Paul Danish

A

frequent refrain of gun child might get hold of it and shoot control freaks is “Why does herself. People who live in homes that anyone need a gun?” Good have guns in them are more likely to question. I’ll get to it in a get shot than people who don’t. You’re minute. an ordinary person and ordinary people But first let’s consider another ques- are too unstable and inept to own a tion: “Why does anyone need an aborgun. tion?”

Gun control advocates, who are disThe question is relevant because the proportionately abortion rights advocases for banning guns and banning cates as well, might argue that the comabortion are quite similar in principle parison is unfair because the primary and in a number of respects are similar purpose of guns (and assault rifles in in practice. particular) is killing.

Both the right to keep and bear Kind of like abortions. arms and the right to abort a pregnancy It is true that using an assault rifle are constitutionally protected rights — sometimes involves killing someone. abortion by virtue of Supreme Court Having an abortion always does. decisions (Griswold vs. Connecticut and You can argue that the “someone” Roe vs. Wade) and gun ownership by that an abortion kills is less than a fully virtue of the Second Amendment. Both formed human and thus can be killed, are under constant attack by self-righor you can argue that while a fetus is teous, arrogant entitled to be prohibitionists who called human, it think they have a does not have the natural right to same rights as a ADVOCATES MIGHT organize other child, anymore ARGUE THAT THE people’s lives for than a child has them. the same rights as COMPARISON IS Sometimes gun an adult, but you UNFAIR BECAUSE THE controllers and can’t argue that an PRIMARY PURPOSE OF right-to-lifers have abortion doesn’t embraced identical involve killing.

GUNS IS KILLING. KIND types of limitaBut back to the OF LIKE ABORTIONS. tions. For example, original questions. both have proposed Why would “waiting periods” anyone need an of several days or abortion? weeks before someone can complete the I can think of a lot of possible reapurchase of a gun or get an abortion. sons why you might need an abortion: Both gun controllers and right-toCarrying a pregnancy to term might lifers are fond of offering limitations on kill you. You don’t want to have a child and alternatives to gun ownership and that was fathered by a rapist. You don’t abortion (which they inevitably refer to have a job and can’t afford to raise a as “common sense”). kid. Your parents may abuse or kill you Abortion? There are lots of “comif they find out you’re knocked up. mon sense” alternatives to abortion — Having a child will derail your career putting the baby up for adoption, aban- plans. Having a baby and raising a child doning it on the steps of a church or would interfere with your lifestyle. police station, or getting your mother to You’re certain you would be a lousy parent. You’re just so not into the father of raise the kid for you. You could even your putative baby. You don’t like being consider raising the child yourself; hey, around children. billions of people all over the world Having access to abortion gives subhave done it, and until about 50 years stance and meaning to the natural right ago most of them were illiterate. How of determining whether or not you will hard could it be? reproduce and with who you choose to Gun controllers can give you an equally condescending list of reasons for do it, which empowers you and makes you free. not owning a gun. The police will provide all the safety you need, and you’re paranoid if you think you need more. A see DANISH PLAN Page 11

GUN CONTROL

Boulder Weekly

Really BAD Ideas

by Joel Dyer & Dave Kirby

e L o o k s li k i ng k tal t h e y ’re t r o l gun con ag a i n .

Ye p, h a pp e n s e ve r y t ime .

LETTERS from Page 7

ment approval was historical fact and a new Walmart Neighborhood Market was scheduled to open in the fall. A day later, Walmart executives, interviewed by the Camera, stated they had never hidden the company’s identity from the people of Boulder. That, fellow citizens, was a plain and simple lie.

Not only did none of the previously submitted paperwork for Walmart’s proposal display the company’s name, instead providing only vague descriptions of the tenant, but, according to the Camera’s Jan. 24 report, “Repeated queries made by the Camera to Walmart went unanswered.” Those queries, which also went to Walmart’s architecture firm and the property owner, weren’t answered because Walmart didn’t want us to know it was them coming to town. This was standard operating procedure for Walmart, which has, over the past decade, faced steadily increasing and increasingly successful popular and municipal opposition to opening new stores. Their scheme is to bypass such resistance, keeping communities unaware until full approval of their planned stores is a done deal.

So, Walmart has offered to us its corporate hand of friendship covered with the slime of blatant dishonesty. They know that the people of Boulder could well reject their advances — we did it to the Supercenter they wanted to open here a number of years back — so they made sure we couldn’t take such action this time around. But, as the city’s economic vitality coordinator, Liz Hanson, has reminded us, “the market will determine which retail stores succeed, and I think Boulder shoppers will decide where they want to spend their grocery dollars.” Check out the detailed Wikipedia entry,

“Criticisms of Walmart” to get a good picture of why the company is the antithesis of a good corporate citizen, and why we shouldn’t shop there, no matter how low the prices. Let’s put the new Walmart out of business!

John Russell/Boulder

Danish misfires

Regarding Paul Danish’s latest clumsy effort to smear the gun-control movement as racist (“Cops in the schools, gun control and race,” Danish Plan, Jan. 24), one question: If the guncontrol movement is racist, why are the most virulent racists in America (the Klan, the Aryan Nations, etc.) also the most adamant opponents of gun control?

Paul Dougan/Lafayette I’d hoped that Danish would outthink NRA’s Wayne LaPierre on armed guards in schools. Alas, gun-lust trumped analysis.

The problem is right in LaPierre’s opening statement, “The only thing that stops a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun”: How do you tell the bad guys from the good guys?

White hats and black hats won’t do it!

If you want armed school guards, you must screen them to near perfection; otherwise you end up with sickos with guns in schools.

Think numbers. Imagine that you can screen potential school guards to 99.99 percent accuracy — only one nutcase in 10,000 slips through. That would be amazingly good. But given the number of schools, that would mean you’ve got a dozen right-wing nuts in the U.S. armed-and-ready to commit the next Sandy Hook. Add to see LETTERS Page 11

February 7, 2013 9

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icumi

in case you missed it

ERIE MAYOR IS A FRACKER On the heels of The Denver Post naming Erie Rising, an anti-fracking group formed by local concerned mothers, among its “Top Thinkers of 2012,” the mayor of Erie apparently thought it would be a good idea to throw these forward-minded community leaders under the bus.

Nice career move.

Erie Mayor Joe Wilson wrote a Feb. 5 editorial for the Post about why Erie Rising, one of the groups that was on the leading edge of questioning the possible negative health and safety impacts of hydraulic fracturing, is just dead wrong.

While we agree with his claim that the standards for research and reporting at the state’s biggest newspaper have naturally waned in the wake of the 2009 death of its competitor, the Rocky Mountain News, we can’t abide the rest of his guest editorial, which flies in the face of the direction the rest of us are going when it comes to fracking.

Granted, the misguided actions of a few activists in harassing oil and gas employees after a 2012 Boulder County commissioners’ meeting were ill-advised. But sometimes, when elected leaders won’t listen to the people, stronger methods are required.

We understand it is mildly annoying to our public representatives when citizens don’t adhere to the strict three-minute public comment rules and take to the streets or, God forbid, wield signs and exercise their rights to protest and assemble, but Joe and other elected officials need to wake up and smell the methane.

The people are demanding answers and action, and when government officials decline to respond, top thinkers take matters into their own hands.

ROMANOFF COCKTAIL We took special notice of the fact that former Colorado House Speaker Andrew Romanoff has launched a bid for Congress, filing as a candidate from the 6th Congressional District.

As we reported in February 2010, when Romanoff was running against Michael Bennet for the U.S. Senate, it was an uphill battle. Bennet was the anointed one, the favored son when it came to Washington connections and donations from the Democratic Party and corporate interests. He was perceived as the chosen candidate when President Barack Obama came to Colorado to stump on his behalf at an event co-sponsored by the Colorado Democratic Party, even though that organization is supposed to remain neutral in a contested primary.

Sure enough, despite the fact that Romanoff seemed to have more grassroots support among the people of Colorado, Bennet won. We perceived it as yet another example of big money winning out.

So now Romanoff is hoping to win the seat currently held

by U.S. Rep. Mike Coffman, who was just re-elected to a second term last fall.

We wish him the best of luck. It is one of the wealthiest districts in the country, but it has reportedly become less of a GOP stronghold after the redistricting prompted by the 2010 Census.

Here’s to Romanoff overcoming the big-money interests this time around.

D

H T E F W O L EE K A E

FLOATING A CONCERT IDEA For all of those stoners who listened to the band Yes in the 1970s and 1980s, high as a kite in a tent in the woods or at one of the group’s concerts, times have changed.

We got a press release announcing that the band has, um, changed its approach.

The group is going to kick off a new tour by performing three of its classic albums live on a cruise ship. Yes, a cruise ship.

Apparently the generation of Yes followers has sobered up and gotten richer.

The maritime gig, dubbed “Cruise to the Edge” in an apparent nod to one of the albums the band will be performing — Close to the Edge, is slated for March 25-30.

The other two albums that will be performed live? We forget because reading the press release gave us a trippy flashback. Those of you who still have enough brain cells left can Google it.

Maybe the members of Rush will be inspired to compete by launching a tour via spaceship.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com Boulder Weekly

letters

DANISH PLAN from Page 9

And here are some reasons that you might want to own an assault rifle or a gun generally: To deter intruders who might want to break into your home — like an exboyfriend with a temper who drinks too much and doesn’t know the meaning of the phrase “no contact” in a court order.

You’ve lived long enough to know that when it comes to your personal safety, there is only so much the police can do, no matter how much you support them.

You want to have a way of defending LETTERS from Page 9

that, the idea of recruiting volunteers for this job, meaning you’re actively seeking nutcases for armed-guard school duty.

It gets worse: Many schools are large enough that one guard wouldn’t be enough to get around the campus.

But if there are two guards, either one could go rogue — so twice the guards means twice the risk.

Dick Dunn/Hygiene

yourself and your family if there is a breakdown in public order and rioting, looting and mob violence break out.

You don’t trust the government, and you think it might be deterred from laying too heavy a hand on Americans’ freedoms if it knows the country is armed to the teeth. You want to be able to go down fighting if the country turns tyrannous and there is a knock on your door at midnight. Like Obama, you’re into recreational shooting. To shoot varmints. Owning a gun gives sub-

stance and meaning to the natural right of self-defense, which empowers you and makes you free.

Some of the reasons on both lists may strike you as more legitimate than others, but that is beside the point.

That is because the real answer to people who ask why does anyone need a gun or an abortion is “Why do you need to know?” Where do you get off telling anyone what they need and don’t need when it comes to exercising their rights?

Access to guns and abortion are their

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Searching for good queso

Editor’s note: The following is an open letter to Boulder Weekly’s restaurant reviewer, Clay Fong.

Clay, I’m looking for good queso in town. Not the bright orange velveeta that some places actually have the nerve to sell, nor the queso fundido that reminds of a cheese pancake. But a good, creamy, flavorful queso.

Thanks!

Ralph Benton/Gunbarrel Fong replies: Ralph, I’ll be the first to admit that I may have limited queso credibility, having been raised on my Dad’s canned soup and Ortega green chile version. That said, I might check out either Agave on 28th, although their version is billed as a fundido, or Cantina Laredo at 29th Street. I can’t personally attest to either version, but I will say I’ve been particularly impressed by Agave’s guacamole and their seafood molcajete with cheese. If you don’t mind making your own, Mexican cooking guru Rick Bayless has published several recipes online, and his tequila-laced version looks both tasty and easy to prepare.

Boulder Weekly

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Nice art!

Thank you for the two exquisite photos by Susan France of the homeless man Onesimus in the Jan. 24 issue of Boulder Weekly. I also enjoyed David Mayhew’s photograph “The Tempest.”

Art of this quality in a newspaper is rare. Thank you again. Keep it coming!

Louise Love/Boulder

rights, and why they choose to exercise that right is no one’s business but theirs.

It’s no secret that a lot of gun rights advocates are right-to-lifers and a lot of abortion rights advocates are gun controllers. Well, a foolish consistency may be the hobgoblin of small minds, but this shared inconsistency is poisonous. Either we start respecting each other’s rights or we’re not going to have any.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com This opinion column does not necessarily reflect the views of Boulder Weekly.

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commentary The new era of conspiracy thinking Why people die when we talk about gun control

by Joel Dyer

W

hen it comes to the the U.S. government had been infiltrated emotional issue of gun by proponents of the one-world governcontrol, Harry Truman ment that would stop at nothing, includhad it right when he ing killing them and their families, in said, “The only thing order to take their guns. They used Ruby new in this world is the history that you Ridge as the proof that the conspiracy don’t know.” theory was true.

I’ve been thinking about Harry’s The racist leaders who planned and observation quite a bit over the past launched the movement were pretty weeks and months as I’ve been listening smart. They made the decision to downto our latest raging gun control debate. play their racial rhetoric in the beginning I’ve been waiting for someone, anyone, in order to make the movement more to talk about the gun-control elephant in appealing to mainstream Americans such the room, but so far it hasn’t happened. I as those in traditional churches, small think it’s time. rural towns, and members of the I admit that I have a slightly differNational Rifle Association whose antient concern than most folks when it government rhetoric following Ruby comes to the subject of gun control. In Ridge became the fuel for the new fact, my main concern, and also my main movement’s growth. area of expertise on this subject, really It all might have died down at some has nothing to do with controlling gun point, except for the federal governownership or trying to figure out the ment’s inability to learn from its misbest way to stop some of us from murtakes. At the same time the anti-governdering the rest of us with assault rifles ment movement was telling anyone who and the like, which I acknowledge is would listen that the feds would do anyquite disturbing and happening at an thing to take away your guns — unbeunprecedented rate. lievably, only a year after Ruby Ridge — Even so, I believe there is a darker the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, side to our current gun conversation.

Firearms and Explosives launched its The elephant is the impact that the gun monumental failure of a raid on David control debate is having on the conspiraKoresh’s Branch Davidian Compound in cy-driven anti-government movement.

Waco, Texas, for the purpose of taking When it comes to the dangerous world of the anti-government movement where Make no mistake about it. We are curguns that had not been properly regisconspiracy theories are taken as gospel, having a black president talking about gun rently setting the stage for things to lit- control on the heels of the worst recession in U.S. history is the perfect storm for tered and may have been converted from erally start blowing up again, big things inspiring violence. semi to fully automatic and, of course, like federal buildings. And as Harry arresting the offending gun owners. The Truman would surely have relished pointing out, it’s eral agents. raid resulted in a televised blood bath followed by a happened before for the exact same reasons.

Gun owners everywhere were beyond outraged by 51-day standoff that resulted in yet another bloodMy belief that history is repeating itself when it the government’s actions, and the leaders of the viobath and fire. comes to the radical right is based on my research of lent, racist right — including the heads of Christian For David Koresh, who was a conspiracy believer the subject over the past 20 years, including spending Identity churches, Aryan Nations, the KKK, Posse who taught his followers that they would know it was many months holed up with people in armed comComitatus and nearly every white supremacist and the biblical end times when the government came to pounds across the country, from Texas to Montana to separatist organization in the country came together get them, the ATF raid to take the Davidians’ guns California to Florida. I have written much on the in Estes Park shortly after the Ruby Ridge incident was their confirmation that the end-times conspiracy subject, including my first book, Harvest of Rage: Why and devised a plan to exploit the national anger over was true.

Oklahoma City is Only the Beginning, which I wrote guns and government. These racist leaders devised At the end of the siege, 76 people within the back in the mid 1990s, the last time things were and launched a plan that would eventually result in compound had been killed, most of them lost in the blowing up over the perceived threat of the governthe creation of a 3-million-strong anti-government fire on the last day of the standoff, many of them ment taking away citizens’ guns. militia/constitutionalist movement. women and children. The anti-government sentiment You may recall that it was a national furor over Recruits to these new anti-government organizaacross the country exploded after the Waco debacle the Second Amendment that launched the birth of tions that sprang up in every state in the union were and so did the number of people who joined the the modern anti-government militia movement in the told that the government wanted to take away their militia movement. Though no one knew it at the early 1990s. The catalyst for the movement’s birth guns so that it could declare martial law and/or sustime, a young former soldier by the name of Timothy was the government’s gun-related sting operation pend the Constitution and/or imprison American cit- McVeigh was in the crowd at Waco watching the against Randy Weaver at Ruby Ridge, Idaho. The izens on behalf of the Jews and blacks who were taksiege and growing angrier with the government with sting went badly wrong, and before it was over, ing over the world. The ultimate threat depended on each passing day.

Weaver’s family was shot to bits by federal agents for which group you were in; some were racially motivatWe all know what happened after that. On the ed, some were not. what was, at most, a minor gun violation. Weaver’s second anniversary of the Waco fire, Timothy These anti-government adherents were told that wife Vicky and son Sammy were both killed by fedMcVeigh blew up the Alfred P. Murrah Federal 12 February 7, 2013

Boulder Weekly

ASKMEABOUTMYGUN.COM ASKMEABOUTMYGUN.COM

Building in Oklahoma City, killing 168 innocent people, including 19 children in a daycare housed in the building. McVeigh and tens of thousands of other anti-government practitioners considered themselves to be at war with our government. For them and their innocent victims, the war was absolutely real.

I remind you of our tragic past in hopes that you will understand my grave concern when I say that the sociological environment that gave birth to the domestic anti-government violence of the 1990s has returned today, more powerful than ever.

If, as Truman said, history is an indicator of future events, then the level of anti-government radicalism that is on the verge of boiling over today far exceeds that which existed 15 to 20 years ago and led to so much racial, religious and conspiracy-fueled violence. Things are worse today because the large end of the anti-government funnel has gotten bigger, much bigger, in recent years.

The funnel Academics, journalists and watchdog groups who study the antigovernment movement have often used the metaphor of a funnel to describe how people transition from merely frustrated with their government into violent radicals at war with their government.

In the 1990s, there was little question by those of us researching the anti-government movement that the NRA represented one of, if not the, largest single organization pouring people into the top of the antigovernment funnel. Joining the NRA with their own ax to grind against government were the many rural refugees of the decade-long farm crisis and their urban cousins living in the Rust Belt, who had been likewise economically hammered by unemployment due to the outsourcing of manufacturing jobs and the recession of the late ’80s and early ’90s.

This isn’t to say that there is anything wrong with being a member of the NRA, an unemployed RustBelt worker or a foreclosed-on farmer. There isn’t.

The premise behind the funnel metaphor is that if you pour enough people into the large end who share a distrust of government — whether it’s a distrust based on their interpretation of the Second Amendment, or a distrust by people who blame the Boulder Weekly

These are the types of messages that drive people deeper and deeper into the antigovernment funnel by alluding to violence and, ever so subtly, the movement’s conspiracy theories. Thousands of websites today are pounding home these anti-government messages.

government for their economic troubles — a small quent repeating of the movement’s conspiracy theonumber of those people, when continuously exposed ries, from Obama’s birth certificate to “who controls to political, racial and religious-based conspiracy the- the Federal Reserve?” with its anti-Semitic innuendo. ories and associated rhetoric, will eventually become Then throw in the fact that a black man is president, true believers and be forced out of the small end of which is a primary motivator for the racist elements the funnel as fully radicalized, dangerous individuals of the movement — who believe that blacks are the who believe it is their duty to fight the government soulless, mud people henchmen at the command of and/or non-whites and/or non-Christians by any the Jews, who are trying to control the world — and means possible, including terrorism and murder. we have one full anti-government funnel.

The theory is that the more people there are It’s no wonder that the anti-government watchdog entering the top of the funnel, group The Southern Poverty the more violent radicals come Law Center is reporting that out the small end. the movement has exploded So who is entering the top since 2008 and is now bigger of the funnel these days? It is than it has ever been, much being filled by a true cornucobigger than it was last time pia of anti-government sentithings started blowing up. ment. As evidenced by current But as I said earlier, milmedia reports, the NRA is still lions of people get pulled into flowing into the funnel with the top of the funnel and never its inflammatory anti-governbreak the law or do anything ment talking points as a result more than exercise their right of the current gun control to free speech. So why do some debate, but it is no longer the people descend deeper into the largest group entering the funnel than others, and why anti-government funnel. are some folks such fertile The Tea Party, which ground for conspiracy theories? many observers believe is merely the reincarnation of Fertile ground the 1990s militia movement You could walk up to — that’s to say that it’s the almost anyone on the street same people, albeit with a and tell them that the reason more political than militaristic our government is trying to agenda, at least on the surface Some messages put out by the anticontrol guns and prevent us government movement are not so subtle. from owning assault rifles is — is likely the largest contribbecause U.N. troops are secretutor to the funnel. With highly massing on the Mexican side of the Texas border profile people like Sarah Palin, who had her own ties in preparation for an all-out attack on U.S. citizens to the anti-government movement in Alaska, and Ron Paul with his Federal Reserve and gold standard that has been sanctioned by our own now-corrupt government, which has, due to a series of complex conspiracies, and Michele Bachmann’s militialegal maneuverings in the courts, become nothing informed revisionist American history leading the way, being anti-government has become nearly main- more than a puppet of the World Bank, which is really just a front for the Jews, who have been plotstream.

Adding fuel to this dangerous fire is Fox News, See GUN CONTROL Page 14 with its constant anti-government whine and freFebruary 7, 2013 13

Outcry prompts Longmont school to remove pro-gun link from website

news

by Jefferson Dodge

A

fter a parent’s protest, a school’s home page. She says she wants Longmont middle school that to remain anonymous, and that other had a link on its home page parents she has talked to don’t want to go to political websites touting on record with the media about their gun rights and Tea Party mesconcerns either, due to potential negative sages has removed the link and apoloconsequences for their families in the gized. district or some kind of retaliation.

Altona Middle School Principal Altona is one of the highest-ranked Joseph Mehsling, who was named middle schools in the area, earning desigColorado’s middle school principal of the nation as a John Irwin School of year in 2012, says that when he included Excellence and a Distinguished the link on the school’s website in 2005, it Governor’s Award in 2010. was just intended to provide history about The link, which was changed last Altona’s motto, “Don’t tread on me,” and week after a parent complained, led to a an early image of the school’s mascot, the website containing the history of the rattlesnake. iconic image and motto, but also linked The symbol of the rattlesnake and the to sites with Tea Party blogs, a store sellA piece of clip art available from a website linked to the Altona home page. words “Don’t tread on me” date back to ing graphic T-shirts bearing guns with the pre-Revolutionary War era, when a flag bearing his political views via the public school’s website. messages like “Come and take it,” and photos of tatthat image and motto was carried by colonial Marines.

One parent of a prospective student says she was toos with snakes wrapped around guns and anti-gunMehsling is a Republican and a former Marine, raisconsidering Altona for her child but changed her See SNAKES Page 16 ing speculation among parents that he was promoting mind after seeing the websites linked to the middle See GUN CONTROL Page 13

ting this overthrow of America since the day that they spelled out their plans for a one-world government as described in the Protocols of the Elders of Zion … and you’d probably get a funny look as that person ran away bewildered and disgusted.

It’s easy to laugh, but it’s really not funny. As crazy as the above conspiracy theory sounds to most people, there are others, hundreds of thousands of others, who absolutely believe that most if not all of the above, admittedly oversimplified for space, conspiracy theories are true.

Conspiracy theories are a complex issue. While they just sound nuts to most people, these theories evolve over time with incredible detail and supposedly supporting data. At their core, conspiracy theories explain the secret reason that something that a person doesn’t like is happening to them. Enter the psychology behind the conspiracies.

You could write a book on this subject — I know, I did — so trying to explain it in a paragraph isn’t easy. At its core, when people become seriously depressed, often due to economic stress from things such as losing your job and not being able to find a new one, or losing a farm or home to foreclosure, their depression stems from blaming themselves for the problem. They believe they are failures who have let down their families. If unchecked, this 14 February 7, 2013

depression can lead to suicide, as evidenced by the fact that suicide was the number one cause of death on the family farm during the farm crisis.

But the human mind is always looking for a way out. When it comes to self-blame, scapegoating or blameshifting is the escape of choice. When it comes to blame-shifting economic problems, the number one choice is to blame the government or the banks or, more often than not, both, for what is happening to you. So when someone tells you that your problems aren’t your fault, it’s the banks’ or the government’s fault, and then they start weaving this incredibly detailed tale of how Satan is fighting God, and the government has been infiltrated, and how you are merely a victim in this cosmic war that now needs you as a soldier to restore America to its rightful place as the super number one most special and blessed country in the world … it feels like a salve to your unbearably painful psychological wounds. There is literally a pain-ending conspiracy salve for every problem a person can have. The closer you are to the bottom, the more fertile your mind becomes for the planting of a conspiracy theory.

Anyone can fall prey to conspiracy thinking.

For example, just a few months ago, a sitting Texas judge made headlines for publicly declaring that he was put-

ting together a local militia to combat U.N. forces massing at the Mexican border to attack us. We all laughed, but we shouldn’t have. The truth is, there were nearly a hundred grown men with guns, all products of the funnel, actually willing to drive south to the border and start shooting people if this judge told them to. This was occurring at a time when there was already speculation among law enforcement and those who monitor the radical right that American vigilantes may already be murdering undocumented migrants along the border. This stuff isn’t funny.

People are dying.

It doesn’t matter that you think conspiracy theories are stupid. What matters is that a shocking number of people believe them with every fiber of their body.

And for those people — true believers like Tim McVeigh and Olympic Park/abortion clinic bomber Eric Rudolph, tax protestor and Posse leader Gordon Kahl, Sikh Temple killer Wade Page, the seven anti-government radicals in Louisiana who just killed two cops, the old man who, just days ago, shot a school bus driver and took a 6-year-old hostage in his bunker, the 10 radicals in Georgia accused of killing a couple to get nearly $100,000 in weapons for the coming race war, the hundreds of thousands of people who call themselves sovereigns, and countless

others who believe that they are at war with their government — every time the issue of gun control starts making headlines, the ensuing debate becomes yet another confirmation that the conspiracy theories they have latched onto are true. And these true believers who have popped out of the small end of the anti-government funnel are willing to murder and terrorize and blow things up in their effort to win a war that the vast majority of us don’t even know is being waged.

There are few things more powerful or dangerous than a mind being driven by hate-fueled conspiracy thinking.

The conspiracy theories are always with us, as is the anti-government funnel, but there are certain times when the headlines, at least to true believers, appear to confirm the truth of those conspiracies, and that is when things can quickly get out of hand and dangerous.

Unfortunately, I believe that we have now entered such a time because we have been in the worst recession in U.S. history, with no thanks to our banks, and we have a black president who is leading the charge to restrict gun ownership.

It’s a conspiracy theorist’s wet dream that will likely unleash a period of sporadic, isolated anti-government terrorism.

I hope that I’m wrong.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com Boulder Weekly

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control messays. And the sages. linked site BW used with photos of the Wayback tattoos of Machine, an snakes online service wrapped that periodiaround guns cally archives with sayings websites as like “Liberty they appeared or Death” was at specific not as contropoints in time, versial at the to view the time. A BW “Don’t tread on me” examination of past link at the bottom of iterations of those the Altona home page sites via the Wayback that led to the controMachine confirms versial material. that they were much The parent intermore toned-down. viewed by Boulder Mehsling says he Weekly expressed conwas unaware that the cern about the prolinked sites had gun imagery in light changed so much of recent school since he created the shootings, and objecthome page.

A couple of the images on ed to the idea that a “I didn’t realize websites linked to the Altona publicly funded school Middle School home page this because, honestly, would have such politI haven’t clicked into ically charged messagthe website since the es so prominently featured on its home Tea Party,” he says. “It was a pretty page. The parent charged that Mehsling innocuous site back in the day, it just might have been using the school websold some Don’t Tread On Me paraphernalia, none of the right-wing stuff site to promote his own political agenit went to now. So when I found out da. about it last week, I was like, ‘Oh my Mehsling and school district officials say they addressed the issue quick- God.’ I’m the webmaster too, so that ly after being notified of it and changed day I removed the link, no problem.”

When asked about speculation that the link to refer back to the school’s he linked to the material intentionally own home page. because of his political persuasions, John Poynton, public information Mehsling says, “No, and if I was, I’d be officer for the St. Vrain Valley School a heck of a mind-reader in 2005.

District, says he got a call from a conWhen’s the Tea Party? 2010? I didn’t cerned parent last week. He and have a five-year plan.”

Mehsling say that unbeknownst to In response to a question about them, the websites linked from the Altona page became more political after whether he is a gun-rights advocate, Mehsling replies, “No, not necessarily.” the rise of the Tea Party in 2010.

He declines to reveal whether he owns Mehsling, who was notified of the guns or supports recent calls to have controversial link by his supervisor, armed guards or armed teachers in Mark Mills, an assistant superintenschools. He also says no parent should dent, says it was an oversight. He told have a fear of retribution.

BW that when the school first opened “If it led to other sites and other in 2005-06, he thought the “Don’t tread links that are displaying inappropriate on me” motto would be appropriate material, it shouldn’t be on a school’s since the school’s mascot was the rattlewebsite,” he says of the Altona home snake. Mehsling says that in response to page. “I’m a former Marine, so people parent questions about the motto and can probably make a lot of assumpthe snake flag in the school, he did an tions about me without talking to me.

Internet search for that saying, and … The Gadsden flag was carried by linked to what he thought was an colonial Marines in 1775, before there innocuous website about the history of was even a United States flag, and it the image, the motto and the flag. At just fit with our rattlesnake motto. … the time, the Gadsden & Culpeper It’s just a great kid motto, and it’s kind store that now features inflammatory of sad it’s been hijacked for other pro-gun goods was only selling simple uses.” images of the snake and the motto on Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com items like T-shirts and coffee cups, he Boulder Weekly

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Advocates: Chicken flap belies true egg industry practices

by Jefferson Dodge

W

hen Grant Family Farms in Wellington declared bankruptcy in December and announced that it didn’t have enough feed to keep its chickens alive, it prompted an outpouring of support from surrounding communities. People descended on the farm to adopt hens before they were killed.

But despite what may have looked like an inspiring outcry, local animal advocates are crying fowl. They say this isolated threat of a relatively limited slaughter pales in comparison to the thousands of chickens that are killed in inhumane ways every week because they were born male or exceeded their useful egg production cycle after only a couple of years.

Chickens are killed on a much broader scale in the mainstream egg production industry than they are at Grant Family Farms, and the advocates say there is only one way to stop the practice: by getting consumers to reduce the demand, to stop eating so many eggs.

Lynn Halpern, outreach coordinator for Peaceful Prairie Sanctuary and director of Bleating Hearts Sanctuary, is critical of the way that the story of Grant Farms and its chickens has played out. She says owner Andy Grant Boulder Weekly

made it sound like the chickens were going to die due to lack of feed, when in reality they were doomed soon anyway.

“If he wasn’t killing them now, he’d be killing them in a year or so,” she says, explaining that it is common practice in the egg industry to dispose of hens when they turn 2 years old, because their egg production drops off.

Since they are bred for laying eggs, they are lean and their meat is not usually ideal for human consumption, so they are sold to be turned into a variety of products, from pet food to fertilizer.

“This is a normal occurrence that happens all the time,” adds Jewel Johnson, who runs the Rooster Sanctuary at Danzig’s Roost in Bennett.

“You have to maintain standard practices to maintain a profit.”

While Halpern acknowledges that some simply consider chickens an agricultural product that is bred for the express purpose of human use, not unlike the planting of trees to create paper, she says the treatment of the hens is inhumane. Plus, she says, if the chickens weren’t killed at age 2, they would likely live eight to 12 years.

Another local animal advocate, Lisa Shapiro, who has a consulting business

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for vegan food manufacturers, says she has personally witnessed another abhorrent practice: Hatcheries inhumanely killing male chicks because only the females can lay eggs and turn a profit when sold to farmers. Shapiro says she has seen male chicks dumped into trash bins alive. Johnson says “grinding them up alive” is commonplace.

And according to Halpern and Shapiro, that’s to say nothing of the conditions in which most of the hens spend their short lives, crammed into warehouses, debeaked to keep them from pecking each other, piled on heaps of their own excrement. Johnson says that to meet the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s requirement that organic eggs come from birds provided with “access to the outdoors,” some farmers will cut a small hole in a corner of the warehouse and surround it with a pen, even though very few of the crammedin chickens have a shot at using the exit.

“The industry views them as production units and no more than that,” Johnson says, adding that one of the newer, more humane practices is to gas chickens with carbon dioxide, but the additional cost of that gets passed on to the consumer.

“It’s a great marketing tool, and people are eating it up,” she says.

Unfortunately, they say, there aren’t enough animal sanctuaries — or capacity in them — to adopt all of the chickens that would otherwise be killed, so change has to come from consumers, from decreasing the demand for eggs.

“If people didn’t buy them, they wouldn’t do it,” Halpern says. “They couldn’t do it without you.”

Shapiro adds, “If we did this with puppies, there would be an uproar.” **** Andy Grant says he felt like he was trying to do the right thing when the

money for chicken feed ran out: He and “Hen Again” program organizer Teresa Redmond-Ott held a massive adoption event Jan. 18-20.

But thanks in part to a misprinted address in a local paper, many concerned animal lovers apparently went to the wrong location on the farm that weekend and took chickens that weren’t part of Grant’s threatened population, as well as eggs, meat and personal property.

The farm, which ran one of the nation’s largest Community Supported Agriculture (CSA) programs, was home to some 12,000 chickens, many of which were saved.

When asked about the conflicting reports on how many birds were adopted and how many were killed, Grant now won’t divulge how many hens he had to “cull,” saying he has taken enough of a beating in the press. And he won’t describe the methods he uses to dispose of the chickens, although he acknowledges he hasn’t heard of the carbon dioxide gas approach.

But Grant insists that his approach in general is much more humane than the methods used at large-scale egg production facilities used by corporations.

“I love animals,” he says. “We treat our animals with absolute respect compared to the industry. … I know that the way we treat our animals is stellar, in the top half-percent. If there’s a farmer in Colorado that the animal rights activists should work with, it should be me.”

He says the industrialized model, even for organic eggs, is to let chickens produce for less than two years, 68 to 72 weeks, until their production drops below 80 percent (eight eggs in 10 days).

“They know to the day,” Grant says of the kill date set by large-scale commercial operators.

Boulder Weekly

news When that day comes, he confirms, those outfits sell the hens to be ground up for things like dog food and fertilizer.

Grant says he never sells his chickens to be used for those purposes when they outlive their economic viability. In fact, he says, he gets chickens of that age from the commercial operations, to the tune of 20,000 a year, and gives them another four months to produce eggs for him, living out their final days enjoying a better life on his farm. Grant says he never de-beaks his hens and they run free during the day.

“It’s really crushed my heart that people have been so vitriolic to a guy who tries to do it right,” he says, estimating the average chicken’s lifespan at closer to four years. “Holy cow, we’re rescuing birds out of industrial barns and giving them a longer life. … We rescue birds that are going to be ground up at 68 weeks and give them this wonderful Colorado retirement home.”

He does acknowledge that when their time comes, he “processes” them for sale to CSA members as “stewing hens” or sells live chickens to ethnic food markets.

Grant says he is not familiar with hatcheries’ procedures for killing male chicks, but he adds that eggs would probably cost about $17 a dozen if farmers were forced to care for equal numbers of hens and roosters. About 5 percent of the chicks he buys turn out to be roosters, but he keeps them all.

“It keeps the ladies happy,” he says with a laugh, “even though it’s stupid of me to keep an unproductive chicken.”

Grant blames Localization Partners for not providing him the money to buy chicken feed in December.

(Localization Partners is a for-profit company launched in August 2011 by Boulder County-based Transition Colorado to help fund local food and farming enterprises, and it raised money last year to keep the farm afloat.)

But Michael Brownlee of Localization Partners says Grant never intended for those chickens to live much longer anyway.

“Andy had told us toward the end of the year that most of that flock was scheduled for termination because they had reached the end of their productive life,” Brownlee says. “We knew those chickens were going to be destroyed or adopted or whatever. But to find ourselves being accused of causing the needless murder of thousands of chickens, that’s just absurd. That’s just drama.”

Brownlee says Localization Partners Boulder Weekly

couldn’t have provided money for the chicken feed because of Chapter 7 bankruptcy rules that freeze all assets.

Grant counters that he was asking for the money before bankruptcy, and that he has been painted as the bad guy.

“I’m not a bloodthirsty, machetewielding farmer,” he says. “We love these creatures.”

And as for the commercial indus-

try’s killing practices?

“It’s what the American consumer forces farmers to do,” Grant says. “It’s easy to point the finger at farmers.”

He adds that the controversies surrounding his farm have only hurt the small organic farming industry.

“This whole flap that has happened these last couple of weeks, and it’s been in the national media, it’s done more to

support industrial agriculture than anything that’s happened in recent history,” he says. “The ones that have won are the industrial corporations. They’re loving this. The heat has switched off of their practices and on to this dumbshit farmer in Colorado. … I’m not the PR and marketing department for Tyson Foods, I’m a farmer.”

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com

February 7, 2013 19

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Boulder Weekly

boulderganic

Bhakti Chai founder Brook Eddy

Kim Coupounas of GoLite

C

Women building a greener and profitable tomorrow

reating a forum for women to explore their own potential in the growing world of sustainable business practice motivated Seleyn DeYarus to bring together three of Boulder’s examples of women leading the way towards a vision for a green economy.

Hunter Lovins of Natural Capitalism Solutions, GoLite’s Kim Coupounas and Bhakti Chai founder Brook Eddy will serve on a panel at 5:30 p.m. on Feb. 12. The event, hosted by DeYarus of Colorado’s Best Organics, will also feature an open discussion with the women in attendance.

“Each one of us can articulate our mission — why are we doing what we are doing and that we are emboldened to do it because we feel like it has an important function to play in society,” DeYarus says of what each speaker shares in common. “So there is a much bigger motivation, and you have to have that if you are wanting to be an entrepreneur. Because the big bucks might not arrive, but if you are hitting the points that matter in terms of being a respectable part of the business commu-

Panel draws together female business owners who are leading the way

by Cayte Bosler nity: giving back and helping those around you flourish … Those are the intangibles sometimes, but where the real inspiration and motive come from.”

DeYarus is not alone in her conviction that underlying values of a business are just as important as a dollar sum, if not moreso. According to a spokesperson for Natural Capitalism Solutions, women own two-thirds of sustainable businesses in the United States. And the attention to tenets like care for the environment, empowering employees and creating a collaborative versus competitive workplace is proving financially successful as well. According to a study done by the Women’s Business Research Center in 2009, if U.S.-based women-

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Hunter Lovins of Natural Capitalism Solutions

owned businesses were their own country, they would have the fifth largest gross domestic product in the world.

“When you get into social mission and look at the companies that women are starting, a lot of the businesses are building into the DNA of the business from the beginning these sorts of conscious capitalism tenets,” DeYarus says.

So how are women generally doing things differently?

“The observation is that women tend to be nurturing by nature,” DeYarus says. “It is part of our mothering instinct, and seeing the connection between caring for the earth and how that translates into a healthier world for everything upon it is a native observa-

Seleyn DeYarus of Colorado’s Best Organics

tion that the feminine seems to understand rather more easily.”

For Coupounas, running a valuecentered business was important to her from the start.

“When my husband and I founded GoLite, it was important to both of us that the company be an expression of our deepest-held beliefs: getting ourselves and other people into nature, respect the environment and a systems approach to how we view the world and operate our own company,” Coupounas says.

Eddy, CEO of Bhakti Chai, considered a trip she took to India years before she decided to up the ante by turning home-brewed chai drink into a business.

“I was studying a movement that was based on the word Bhakti and I noticed that people were living their Bhakti by helping their neighbors,” Eddy says. “That is how they prayed instead of going into a cave or temple or meditating. Their way of devotion was through service, so that inspired me to make an impact that would help people.

See WOMEN Page 22

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boulderganic

eco-briefs

by Boulder Weekly staff GREENLAND’S ICE CORES MAY MAP FUTURE WARMING

A study released by a team of international scientists indicates that Greenland’s ice core layers, which date back 100,000 years, may shed light on the future of global warming.

The recent study is a part of the North Greenland Eemian Ice Drilling project, led by the University of Copenhagen and involving scientists from the University of Colorado Boulder.

Studying the Greenland ice core layers, formed over millennia by compressed snow, reveals information about temperature, greenhouse gas levels and moisture changes during the last interglacial period: the Eemian. Similar to tree-ring dating, the ice core layers house atmospheric gas bubbles and isotopes that aid in understanding annual climate variations of the past.

Isotopes found in the cores trace changes in greenhouse gas levels and temperature fluctuations of the past. Essentially, the cores provide a “road map” to show where the Earth’s atmosphere is heading in the future, according to a press release from CU. However, Jim White, lead U.S. investigator on the project, says that today’s anthropogenic warming could override episodic changes such as the Eemian in the future.

“Unfortunately, we have reached a

point where there is so much carbon dioxide in the atmosphere it’s going to be difficult for us to further limit our impact on the planet,” says White. “Our kids and grandkids are definitely going to look back and shake their heads at the inaction of this country’s generation. We are burning the lion’s share of oil and natural gas to benefit our lifestyle, and punting the responsibility for it.”

Susan France

fected cell proliferation, cell death and prolactin release.

“People automatically think low doses do less than high doses,” Cheryl Watson, a University of Texas biochemistry professor and lead author of the study published in Environmental Health Perspectives, told the Environmental Health News. “But both natural hormones and unnatural ones like [BPS] TIME FOR NEW WATER BOTcan have effects at TLES — AGAIN surprisingly low doses.”

A University of Texas The hormone study on Bisphenol S (BPS), changes are reportedly thought to be a safe enough to conclude substitute for the known Nicole Larson of the Southside Walnut that BPS could have endocrine-disruptor Bisphe- Cafe prepares a customer receipt. similar health effects to nol A (BPA), concluded that BPA, which has been Bisphenol S also disrupts cell linked to reproductive life. BPS has replaced BPA problems, obesity and cancers. in consumer plastics and thermal paper, like A Tufts University postdoctoral fellow who cash register receipts and the paper ultrastudies BPA said the new research makes a sound images are printed on. convincing case for eliminating BPS expoThe researchers exposed rat cells to BPS sure. and found that exposure even in low doses to the chemical led to changes in how the Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com cells respond to natural estrogen and af-

WOMEN from Page 21

When I decided to start a chai tea company I wanted to build in some of those tenets — doing good things for the planet and being sustainable.”

Lovins was out of the country and not available for comment at the time of Boulder Weekly’s interviews, but her business, Natural Capitalism Solutions, drives the idea of businesses for a greener economy home. The term Lovins has popularized, “conscious capitalism,” simply means a company that has values embedded in its mission and how it operates day to day.

“It’s always about getting the mes-

sage out because it’s a very competitive landscape, and it’s the challenge that you are operating on a principle-based business and that the whole motivation is a much bigger mission,” DeYarus says.

And getting the message out about how women can excel in their current organization or how they can stretch their legs and feel encouraged to grow as entrepreneurs is exactly what DeYarus and the event speakers are hoping women gain by attending.

“Entrepreneurship is fraught with all sorts of challenges, and you’re not guaranteed success, but we want people to

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come away with some practical ideas of how they can take sustainable business practices that help cultivate leadership and culture wherever you are, that inspire new ideas of how you can ratchet things up a notch of how to be more mindful of the bigger picture,” says DeYarus.

Keeping in mind the bigger picture is particularly important in this time when environmental and economic problems are complex and challenging, Coupounas says.

“I want attendees to have a clear sense of empowerment of how they can be a part of building the conscious capi-

talism of tomorrow,” she says. “That they understand how to put their own best foot forward, knowing that these problems that we are tackling in the sustainability realm are bigger than gender, or any company, and we can solve them only by working together. So knowing what our strengths are and why women tend to be dominant in this field is also a lens into how can we engage more men into this endeavor — and how we can work better with both women and men to contribute to the solution.”

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com

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February 7, 2013 23

adventure

Running out of sight

Michael Stone on his first road marathon ‘blind’

by Stephen Kasica

courtesy of Surf City Marathon

A

t the start of the Surf City Marathon in Huntington Beach, Calif., on Sunday, Feb. 3, the announcer asked the more than 2,000 people at the start line to raise their hands if they were running their first marathon.

Boulder resident Michael Stone put up his hand, but it was not technically his first marathon. In the last decade, he has run 26.2 continuous miles more than a few times — after each 2.4-mile swim and a 112-mile bicycle ride in the 11 Ironman triathlons he completed.

He was also wearing another label that was not exactly accurate: blind. He has known that he was legally blind since 2003, but this was the first race he

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would compete in with “BLIND” printed on a hazard-orange vest over his sleeveless triathlon suit. As his eyesight continues to degenerate, he decided he ought to wear the vest for the first time.

“But to say that I’m not using my eyes is not true,” he says.

Stone was born with vision, but never had perfect eyesight. For most of his adult life he has just read his phone extremely close to his face. It was not until Sept. 8, 2003 — a day he says he will never forget — that an optometrist diagnosed him and his younger brother with a genetic disease called Cone-Rod Dystrophy. It is a retinal degenerative see BLIND Page 26

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W

hen Liz Bailey first clipped her boots into a pair of dual snowboards two months ago, she was a little skeptical. An avid snowboarder, she wasn’t quite sure how these things on her feet would change the experience of gliding down the mountain.

“I thought, ‘How am I going to do this?’” Bailey says. Like many others new to the idea of two mini boards strapped to her feet rather than one bigger one, she was worried about keeping her legs steady and about how difficult it might be to maneuver on the snow.

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disease much like macular degeneration, Joanna Zeiger, an Olympic triathlete which Stone watched take his grandfaand friend of Stone’s, says she’s glad he ther’s sight. was doing a race on flat, even ground.

“I was no longer just this guy who “In terms of running the road maradidn’t see well,” Stone says. “I’m this guy thon, I think it’s a heck of a lot safer than who has a real problem.” when he goes out and does those At that point, Stone’s eyesight was Xterras,” she says. “I always get very nertwo times below the standard for legal vous when he does those things.” blindness, and it has only degenerated Halfway through the race, averaging further since then. If you were to put on a 7:55 minutes per mile, another runner pair of too-strong prescription glasses, pulled up alongside Stone to talk. When smear the lenses with Vaseline and shine the runner asked how fast he wanted to multiple flashlights in your eyes, Stone finish, Stone replied that he did not really says that would be very similar to how he care. sees the world.

Stone did not courtesy of Surf City Marathon Contrary to grow up playing what others might sports, and his expect from somevision loss preone who is “blind,” empted his interest Stone does not live in endurance in complete darksports. Stone says ness. He is so lighthe was especially sensitive that the attracted to indilight from a chanvidual sports after delier in a dimly lit his diagnosis restaurant will because they were require him to put one of the few on his sunglasses. things he could do So when the by himself anyrace started before more. When Stone dawn and Stone goes to a restaubegan running on rant, he has to have the palm-tree-lined the menu read to him. He cannot pick out groceries on his Pacific Coast Highway, the lighting conown. It has been more than 10 years since ditions were perfect for him. He was also he last drove a car. running this race without a guide direct“What it comes down to is that when ing him where to go and alerting him to you lose your independence, the last thing obstacles in his path. But using his hearyou want to be is more dependent,” he ing and limited sight, he was able to says. “Some of this is a matter of pride, eventually separate himself with a group and some of this is just that I want to go of 80 other runners clinging to the paceout and have that freedom. So running makers assigned to run the race in 3:30. and riding my bike is freedom to me.”

Ardy Azadgan was one of these pacWhen Stone passed under the balers, and he made an effort to alert Stone loon arch and American flag at the finish to rough terrain and obstacles in his path line in 3:30:35, he finished in 230th place throughout the race.

— out of 2,274 total participants. If he “He seemed very even, very smooth and wasn’t breathing hard,” Azadgan says. had not gone off course a dozen times, sometimes wandering for minutes before “That’s when I had a hint that he knew being redirected back onto the course, he what he was doing and how hard he was speculates that he could have run 3:20, or going to push himself.”

3:10.

Since being diagnosed with RodBut, he says, “to go out and run a Cone Dystrophy, Stone has completed three-and-a-half marathon, legally blind, more than 100 races, including 25 half by myself, it feels pretty damn good.”

Ironman triathlons and 15 Xterra offStone says he does not expect to be road triathlons. Along the way, he has doing this forever. In the last year, his eyelearned to adapt his senses and his race sight has degraded faster than ever, and it strategy. If the ground beneath his feet is possible that one day he could be totally suddenly feels like soft grass instead of blind. But until then, he plans to keep the hard boardwalk, he knows he has competing in the marathons and triathgone off course. The chatter, footfalls and lons. His goal is to break 3:00 in the marheavy breathing from other runners also athon within a year. cue him to where the course ebbs and But no matter how fast he runs, he flows. And, his limited vision gives him a says, his main goal is to savor the time basic guide to shapes that might be in that he gets to spend alone on his own front of him, although he says he is not two feet. able to distinguish a runner from a trashRespond: letters@boulderweekly.com can.

Boulder Weekly

Meredith J. Graham

adventure All things paint, including how to get it out of your kid’s hair.

Dual snowboard reps Matt Chiesa, Liz Bailey and Mateo Gomez

Bernadette, Paint Department.

Since 1992.

DUAL from Page 25

snowboards don’t look like anything else on the slopes. They differ from a snowboard in one key way — riders are afforded the freedom to move both legs independently, without having one foot unstrapped. That’s great on the lift, for getting off the lift, for doing tricks and especially for moving on flat areas where snowboarders often get stuck and have to scoot, jump or unclip to walk to steeper terrain.

“One major advantage is that you just strap in once,” Gomez says. “You can walk in them and create your own speed.”

Chiesa, Gomez and Bailey recently made a trip to Loveland Ski Area to show off their product to the mountain manager and events coordinator, discuss a demo day and get dual snowboards approved for use at the resort.

“I think I had heard of them before, but not much. I definitely had never seen them in person before,” says Duncan Maxwell, Loveland’s events coordinator. “I’m in the industry, so I get to see a lot of these things, but I’m sure a lot of people still don’t have a clue what they even are.”

During the visit, Loveland did approve the use of dual snowboards.

(Other things like snow bikes and skates are not allowed at many resorts for safety reasons.) Maxwell also seized the opportunity to strap on a pair to try them out.

“It’s very different,” he said. “But it’s pretty cool for someone looking for a new challenge.”

Vail Resorts also allows dual snowboards, but they’re not being spotted on the slopes very often. Maybe they’ll catch on, and maybe they’ll flash in and out like skate skis did.

One Eldora snowboard instructor’s response was that it might be cool to get on different edges, but bottom line: creative, and maybe a little stupid.

Bailey says that when she was still Boulder Weekly

learning how to ride them — and there is a learning curve because they’re so different from skiing or snowboarding — she started out holding the two boards together like a snowboard, then when she was more comfortable, she’d break one leg free to do something she couldn’t have done before.

“With a snowboard, when you’re going downhill, you’re riding on your heel side or your toe side,” Gomez explains. “With the dual snowboards, you’re not committed to heel or toe — you can lift one leg, whip around. … The only real limitation is in deep powder.”

Dual snowboards lack the surface area necessary to stay on top of the powder and they sink into it.

In addition to being a new way to get riders down a mountain, duals also offer new possibilities when it comes to tricks. A quick YouTube search will yield videos showing dual snowboarders grinding on rails and boxes and doing flips and in-the-air splits off ramps.

The boards, which took home the international sporting goods trade fair ISPO’s “Brand New” award in 2012 for best new product, are currently only available online in Colorado ($299 on both dualsnowboards.com and Chiesa’s own website, city2snow.com). They’ve been marketed mostly on the West Coast — and have become popular in Europe and South Korea — but recently made inroads in Utah and are working their way into Colorado.

“We have over 2,000 people riding Duals all over the world, and it may be a small percentage in Colorado now, but it is growing quickly,” Rickett says.

Demos are planned in the area for later this season (check for dates on their websites or Facebook).

“It’s just fun,” Gomez says. “I’ve been out 19 days this season, and I only brought my snowboard out on three.”

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com

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February 7, 2013 27

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Boulder Weekly

buzz

Not so endless love

Museum of Broken Relationships displays artifacts from romance gone wrong

by Elizabeth Miller Images courtesy of the Boulder Museum of Contemporary Art and the Museum of Broken Relationships

W

hen the Museum of Broken Relationships put out a press release in November announcing an upcoming exhibition in Boulder, it began with a question: Do happy people break up

too?

Boulder, the writer had read, was said to be one of America’s happiest cities. But the associate curator of the Boulder Museum of Contemporary Art (BMoCA) had called, having seen the Museum of Broken Relationships in Zagreb, Croatia, and had asked the staff to do an exhibition in Boulder. When the museum travels, it brings 50 or 60 items from the existing collection to join items collected from that local site — all donations to join the museum’s permanent collection.

“We will either be left empty-handed or we will prove that break-ups do not stand in the way of happiness,” the announcement reads.

They’re not leaving empty-handed.

BMoCA has been collecting donations since December, and the number of artifacts of relationships gone wrong are now crowding the corners and covering the desk in Associate Curator Petra Sertic’s office. And on Feb. 14, BMoCA will open the 26th traveling exhibition of an art display that is part art, part anthropology and part therapy.

“I was [in Croatia] and somebody said I should check it out, this funky little Museum of Broken Relationships, so I did. And yeah, it is really funky, but it’s also a really strong idea about offering an opportunity to deal with and overcome and let go of human emotions related to breakups, which is a part of our modern life more than it maybe used to be in previous times,” Sertic says.

“But although that is the case, there still isn’t a process where you can deal with it. You sort of lock yourself in a room where you can deal with it and come out when you’re done, right? But here we have an opportunity to have social engagement, something maybe that’s a ritual, something that can be acknowledged by everyone and shared with others. … You have to find a way to let go, and there aren’t really that many places to do so. We have rituals for everything else, markers of engagements and weddings and so on, even graduation, but nothing that marks a breakup, although there are so many emotions involved with that “Heart Padlock,” “Gold-plated Penguin Cufflinks” and “Unwanted Letters” were donated at the Boulder Museum of Contemporary Art for the Museum of Broken Relationships. “An Ex-Axe” came from a Berlin exhibition.

Boulder Weekly

see BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS Page 30

February 7, 2013 29

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BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS from Page 29

that it is a significant experi“After four years of ence in our lives.” traveling and seeing that The relics that have people react exactly the come rolling in arrive with same wherever we go, we curatorial details such as the decided to open a real location and dates of the museum in Zagreb,” relationship and a brief narGrubišić says. rative on the story of the What that’s meant, of object. course, is that he and For a pair of signs for a Vištica have continued to landscape architecture combe friends, working and pany, the story goes, “These traveling together in the signs have been lurking in years that have followed the back of my garden for their breakup. nearly 20 years. I don’t want “It wasn’t really easy, of to write about the relationcourse,” he says. “It takes a ship and its ignominious lot of self control and end. We worked together for “Unwanted Letters” is among the donations received from Boulder. understanding and so on, another two years until I but when we started with threw a tea mug (the big the museum it just transone) through the window, missing formed our relationship, and we’re his head by about nine inches — really good friends.” right where I aimed its flying The project, both in terms of through the air. He was wrong their experience and in terms of the thinking I would ‘just get over it.’” museum itself, challenges what Other items include a shadowbox seems to be the common knowledge of items from a wedding, less imporon how to handle a breakup. tant now that the divorce has been “One of the main things I always finalized; a wooden box full of notes say is, when you look at all the newsfrom a relationship that started in paper articles, self-help books and so high school and died in college; on, most of them deal with it like, stacks of love letters returned to the just destroy everything, get rid of everything and as soon as you get writer; a lock bought with a “love better, just jump on a new train and bridge” in Paris in mind; a toaster here we go again,” Grubišić says. taken in vindication from a splitting “And you know, I think if you spend household; a wedding dress that four or five years with somebody, I came with the story: “I met him “A Box Made of Matches” from Maribor, Slovenia presume if you’re a normal person when I was 22 and fell head over and you’re not pathological or someheels in love for five minutes. I thing, at least two-thirds of that time dreamed it would work. We dated with it is the thing that is the real was really good. If it didn’t work out, it for seven years and decided we should idea,” Sertic says. “It’s all these differdoesn’t mean you have to hate that perget married. I bought the first and only ent stories. It’s not just one person’s son, forget that person and so on and dress I tried on, not really thinking story, it’s really all of our story.” so on. That’s what life is. It isn’t a fairy about what I wanted.”

The story of the museum itself tale — you meet someone and live From a curatorial perspective, the starts, naturally, with a breakup. In happily ever after. Your life will consist objects present some challenges: how 2006, Olinka Vištica and Dražen to exhibit — in a way that’s tasteful Grubišić were ending their relationship of different relationships and different people who will influence you in a difand feasible — an object like a Post-it and moving apart. note. The Museum of Broken “We had a discussion of what to do ferent way, and I don’t think destroying everything that might remind you of it Relationships’ style is to go with a forwith the things that — not the useful is a good way to go.” mal approach, and BMoCA has freshly things, but the things that are sort of Vištica and Grubišić arrive in painted white pedestals for the occalike a token of love, things that you Boulder on Feb. 9 to help put the exhision. bought each other that really mean bition together. They’ll bring about 50 “They look really formal, like a nothing but just as a show of affecitems from their permanent collection, museum exhibition, and all these tion,” Grubišić says. “It was just like, plus 10 from the 110 donations everyday objects will be elevated, given wouldn’t it be great if there was a received at a recent exhibition in Paris, full attention, a little spotlight,” Sertic museum where you could store these to supplement the nearly 30 donated in says. “So it literally came out of the things so they don’t bother you so Boulder. closet; it’s out in public, put on a pedthey’re safe and your memories are “That’s the real work, choosing the estal for everyone to look at.” somehow safe because of that, and you objects and putting them in perspective On their own, these items wouldn’t can return to them if you want to.” and thinking where we’re going, so be considered a work of art, and plenty The two artists put in a proposal there will be some objects you will of them would be considered things for an exhibition in Zagreb, and won. really easily relate to, some objects that never meant to be shared with a person The collection began with items will surprise you, we try to create a outside that relationship, like love letfrom their relationship and those of roller coaster of emotions so people can ters. But the objects aren’t really the their friends’, and that first exhibition focus. was followed by invitations to bring the laugh and cry at the same time,” Grubišić says. “Between the lines of “The story, of course, that goes exhibition to other places.

Boulder Weekly

buzz really personal relationships between two people you can read out a lot of different things, economical problems, wars, racial problems — it’s all there, of course, because if it’s present in society it will show up in a relationship as well.”

Three years of collecting objects have presented ongoing surprises and “Wow!” moments, but, he says, there’s one object that still tops the list: an axe.

The axe was purchased after a livein girlfriend announced she was leaving for another woman, and she departed on a vacation with that new love interest. Every day the abandoned lover started to feel depressed, she’d take an axe to the left-behind furniture; when the girlfriend came home to collect it, she found it in tidy piles of pieces.

It’s the kind of train wreck of a story we all love to gather around and watch — and the end result of a tour through the museum’s collection is part funny and part heartbreaking, always layered with the gripping nature of watching someone else’s life fall apart.

“I love a good story. I feel like people are voyeuristic at heart, so who does not want to check out these remnants from relationships?” says Dan Condon, who donated a box of gourmet microwave popcorn from a relationship that ended in November. “I just, I had to part with it. We were supposed to eat it together.”

The ritual, and the storytelling, were healing, he says — and now, there’s the possibility of meeting someone new, perhaps at the Valentine’s Day reception for the exhibition’s opening. While it might seem counterintuitive to spend a holiday dedicated to romance at a museum devoted to its demise, Sertic says there’s no need to view the occasion as one for bitterness and misery.

“For me, it’s not so much a cynical approach, but rather one that sort of offers some kind of other opportunity that says that yes, this is also part of our life, but it can be dealt with funny or, if you feel sad, then that’s OK too, or if you’re still angry, let it all out,” she says. “It’s all OK. It’s nothing that we need to hide.”

“The thing is, it’s all very personal, it’s all very sincere and it’s strong just by that,” Grubišić says. “It’s not fake.

It’s the documentary of life. It’s the documentary of love.”

And what the record shows — among the happy survey-takers of Boulder just like everywhere else in the world — is that life and love really do go on, even after a breakup.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com Boulder Weekly

“Handcuffs” from Zagreb, Croatia

ON THE BILL: Olinka Vištica and Drazen Grubišić will be doing an artists’ talk at 6:30 p.m. on Feb. 13 at the Art Students League of Denver, at 200 Grant St., Denver, and will be at the opening reception at 6:30 p.m. on Feb. 14 at the Boulder Museum of Contemporary Art. The Museum of Broken Relationships exhibition will be on view until May 26. For more information, visit www.bmoca.org.

February 7, 2013 31

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Boulder Weekly

overtones ON THE BILL: Grant Farm with special guest Keith Moseley plays the Boulder Theater on Friday, Feb. 8. Frogs Gone Fishin’ and Gipsy Moon open. Tickets are $10 in advance and $12 at the door. 2032 14th St., Boulder, 303-786-7030.

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Growing a new sound

Grant Farm looks to add a little country to Boulder’s jam scene

by Stephanie Riesco

T

yler Grant has a National Flatpicking Championship under his belt, solo releases and a resume stacked with names of artists he’s worked with. Yet, even through his successes during his time in mythical Nashville, Tenn., the guitarist was always waiting for a chance to start something new.

“I had a longing to play more electric guitar, which is something I grew up doing and had been focused on the acoustic for so long,” Grant says. “And there comes a time when you just don’t want to work for other people any more.”

After a few years and a move to Colorado, Grant has more than started something. Formed in 2011, Grant Farm has already released an album, toured across the country, and carved out its very own niche in Colorado’s jam band community. For Grant, Colorado fans were crucial in getting his vision off the ground.

“If you have a good band and play in Colorado, the fans will come and they will love it,” Grant says. “In Nashville when you start a band you’re just playing for all of your musician friends. There’s not much gray area between just getting started and playing the big time. It’s a great place to see live music and hear live music, but there isn’t nearly the support that there Boulder Weekly

CLEASON DUNN WRIGHT Friday, February 15 – 8pm A ROCKIN’ VALENTINE’S PARTY WITH

HINDSIGHT

is on the Front Range.”

Grant Farm might be a newcomer in a place where jam bands are as common as hybrid cars, but the band has ties to top local acts in the area through Andy Thorn (Leftover Salmon) and Keith Moseley (The String Cheese Incident). While playing in the The Emmitt-Nershi Band in 2009, Grant and Thorn started working on a side project together, which eventually became Grant Farm.

Moseley joined on as bassist, until SCI duties dragged him away. Thorn had other duties as well, and The Grant Farm lineup now includes Chris Misner (drums), Adrian Engfer (bass) and Sean Foley (keyboard).

Despite this connection to the scene, Grant Farm’s sound aims to bring a new twist to a style they love.

“We’re definitely in the jam band scene, which is kind of the most powerful scene in these parts,” Grant says.

“But we’re bringing in a country music element that I haven’t seen too much from other bands in the area.”

Grant Farm combines roots, rock and “cris-co” (a melding of country and disco) to craft upbeat songs that spiral into energetic jams. But, in their selftitled album released in March of last year, each band member finds ways to stretch beyond these confines. Misner brings an element of jazz, R&B and

funk to their sound, and Engfer spearheads the band’s rock and reggae elements. Though Foley and Grant both have a background in country and bluegrass, Foley goes back to the classic American songbook, while Grant celebrates ’50s rockabilly. Especially when watching their Nicki-Bluhm-inspired Van Session videos, it’s obvious that the group’s dynamic allows these influences to come together.

“We really do take the guitars out in the van and work on songs and throw out ideas,” Grant says. “We’re always in that musical conversation, which is something I’ve never had before. We’re really that group driving down the road singing songs, playing accordions.”

With catchy songs like “I Come from the Country” and “Engineer,” it’s clear that, at its core, Grant Farm’s music is just about having a good time.

Grant says that the band’s laid-back, friendly personality really shines onstage.

“When we take the stage we try to not take ourselves too seriously,” Grant says. “There’s no use getting all nitpicky about missing a note here and there or something. We’re just doing our best to enjoy our music and hope that the audience picks up the same enthusiasm.”

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com

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February 7, 2013 33

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overtones Two guys and a process

Discipline and execution are key to El Ten Eleven’s nuanced sound

by Dave Kirby

E

Fonald Photography

xtending past 10 minutes in length, a dicey indulgence for any artist not conceding the mantle of prog or jamband, the title track to El Ten Eleven’s latest CD Transitions begins its journey as a humble, diffident down-tempo 4/4 meditation, with guitarist Kristian Dunn looping a tapped guitar figure and percussionist Tim Fogarty laying out a modest, accented house beat underneath. Traversing the murky perimeter around avant-garde, ambient and pure instrumental pop, this is familiar territory for the SoCal duo, now kicking off their second decade as an ongoing franchise.

And then, at about 4:55, the damn thing slips a beat, returns promptly to “But there was a whole theme musiits poised determination, slips again, cally — and personally — through the then again, and the duo suddenly halves whole song, Kristian and myself had the beat and torques the tempo into a gone through a whole bunch of things semi-gallop, Dunn throwing shimmerin our lives. Divorces, and he had a kid ing pastel washes across an unleashed and got remarried and moved, so there Fogarty percussion workout, before were all these kind of transitions. That yielding yet again two minutes later was kind of the concept, the song took into a skittering bass-heavy rock figure, a little while to work on, over the and eventually finding its way out with course of I don’t know how many an unabashedly months, just trying epic, rapturously to work it out so resolved coda. that it felt good.”

ON THE BILL: El Ten Eleven plays the Fox Theatre on Friday, There’s a grueWe couldn’t Feb. 8. Doors at 8:30 p.m. Slow some and paradoxihelp but wonder if Magic and Alex Klinger open. cal brilliance at process, for lack of a Tickets are $12 in advance, $14 day of show, plus $2 for under-21 tickets. work here, instrubetter term, is really 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-443-3399. mental and heavily the third guy in automated music this outfit. Where blasting with to use technology, humanity and spontaneity, cerebral but when let the loops carry a passage, or soulful. when to kick out the plug and just wail.

It was our intention to ask Tim Fogarty plays with electronic and conFogarty which of the CD’s seven tracks ventional drums, and a loop machine, was the most challenging to get just and Dunn plays a double neck guitar/ right (the band’s obvious obsession with bass standing over a NASA-esque bank meter and the now-precise, now-anarof pedals, and a loop machine. chic character of their music leaves little Shrugs the skeptic, playing over a doubt that getting it anything less than loop sounds easy. Sure it does, but put right wouldn’t cut it). up a guy playing guitar and bass over But “Transitions” was quite obvitwo looping tracks simultaneously, ously the masterwork. A suite stitched while the drummer is playing over his together with bits of uncompleted com- own loop, and the composition throws positions maybe? carefully placed tempo and meter “We ended up having parts that we changes into the mix, and without a actually chopped out,” Fogarty told us by strident dosage of discipline, the whole phone last week. “So it wasn’t like two thing can collapse into a mechanized medium-sized songs that we sandnoise fail. wiched together, it was actually a little So … discipline (note the partially bit longer than that. coincidental Robert Fripp reference) is

the third guy in this band?

“Yeah, for sure,” Fogarty says. “I mean, in a weird way, not having a third person is sort of a limitation, but it’s also sort of a freedom to just having two people working on this. And, yeah, the looper and the process is part of the overall sound. Definitely.”

It’s no small feat that these guys have plied these waters, an instrumental duo basically working a club and small theater scene, for more than a decade, regularly selling out their shows in Southern California and even gaining audiences from festival appearances.

Some of their popularity has been drawn as well from their work as soundtrack artists, with pieces featured in Gary Hustwit‘s Design Trilogy films, and as bed music for TV shows like CSI: Miami and The Real World.

But the club circuit is the duo’s bread and butter. The groove scene has gone a long way toward making the world a little safer for non-vocal music, but El Ten Eleven won’t be mistaken as foot soldiers in that regiment.

Fogarty says that he and Dunn retain some awareness that instrumental music — especially as it drifts toward the ambient fringes — isn’t always the easiest sell for a mainstream crowd.

“If people don’t get it, they don’t get it. But I also feel like, there is a lot of great music out there — classical, some oldies — that’s purely instrumental. So it can work.

“Plus we don’t have to deal with a singer. So beautiful.”

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com Boulder Weekly

th e boe decke r th eate r

the DaIrY Center FOr the artS

26th & Walnut Street theDaIrY.Org | 303.440.7826 x110

Fe b r uary 7, 8, & 9 - 8:30pm

BOULDERBALLET

2013 Stepping Out

C o n t e m p o r a r y Ballet Theatre

36 February 7, 2013

The Einaudi Collection Choreography by Jayne Persch (formerly ABT & Royal Ballet)

Anything Goes

Choreography by Alex Davison (formerly Miami City Ballet)

Pygmalion

Choreography by Peter Davison (Ballet Builders Award, New York)

Friday February 15 • 8 PM Saturday February 16 • 8 PM Sunday February 17 • 2 PM Dairy Center for the Arts 2590 Walnut Street, Boulder $25 Adult • $17 Student/Senior Box Office: 303.444.SEAT (7328) Melissa Heslep and Matthew Helms. Photo by Sue Daniels

www.boulderballet.org Boulder Weekly

arts & culture

Courtesy of Boulder Ensemble Theatre Company

Dictation from oblivion

A pen and paper hero at the Dairy

by Gary Zeidner

O

ver the past 10-and-a-half bial hand. Having seen BETC’s An years, I have seen numerEmpty Plate in the Café du Grand Boeuf ous theater companies rise and Curious Theatre’s version of Opus, and fall in Boulder. While Mr. Hollinger’s voice was instantly recperennial favorites like ognizable in Ghost-Writer, his most Boulder’s Dinner Theatre have tricomplex and rewarding play in my umphed year in and year out, other experience. companies have sprouted, blossomed, In 1919 New York, an author dies. withered and died. Staying power, it As Franklin Woolsey ( Jim Hunt) dicseems, is as hard to come by in theater tates his latest novel to his longtime as it is in any of life’s other endeavors. typist and collaborator, Myra Babbage (Unless, of course, you’re Ron Jeremy.

(Laura Norman), he pauses mid-senGet well soon, big tence, never to speak guy.) again. At least not ON THE BILL: Ghost-Writer, proIt is for that out loud. In the days duced by the Boulder Ensemble Theatre Company, plays through reason that I cannot following his funeral, Feb. 16 at the Dairy Center for the sing loudly enough Myra begins seemArts. Tickets are $19-$25. For tickets the praises of the ingly to channel or information, visit www.boulderensembletheatre.org or call 303Boulder Ensemble Woolsey, working to 444-7328.

Theatre Company finish his final tome (BETC). Founded from beyond the just five years ago, tomb.

BETC immediately announced itself as As Myra cranks out chapter after an up-and-comer to be watched. chapter, Vivian Woolsey (Anne BETC quickly proved its worth by Sandoe), the author’s widow, balances choosing challenging, enlivening mate- grief with incredulity. Her desire to rial and producing it deftly and sucbelieve something of her husband lives cessfully. It is happily and without hes- on crashes against her logical mind, itation then that I declare BETC to be one that dismisses séances and Ouija one of the absolute best theater compa- boards as charlatans’ tools. The nignies working in Boulder today. gling possibility that her beloved could BETC’s current show, Ghoststill be in contact with the living world Writer, is one of its finest. This is the but choosing only to commune with second play written by Michael Myra gnaws at her. In the end, her Hollinger that BETC has brought to conflicted emotions lead her to hire an the Dairy, and clearly Mr. Hollinger’s investigator to observe Myra and work fits glove-like on BETC’s prover- deduce whether she is a fraud sullying

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Franklin’s good name or something … else.

Despite the presences of Franklin and Vivian, Ghost-Writer is effectively a one-woman show. As Myra recounts her history working for Woolsey — both before and after his death — to the audience standing in for Vivian’s investigator, she takes part in every scene. For much of the play, Jim Hunt as Woolsey must stand silent and motionless in the background — no easy task itself — as Norman’s Myra recounts their past or works to finish his final tale. Sandoe’s Vivian, though a presence throughout, joins the others on stage only a handful of times.

Playing Myra for the second time, Norman becomes the character with graceful ease.

A deceptively layered play, GhostWriter may be seen by many in its audience to be a simple, albeit nuanced, story about the fairly commonplace relationships among Franklin, Vivian and Myra. Look deeper, though, and Ghost-Writer proves a puzzle box or, perhaps, an onion. After all, when each

layer is peeled back another is revealed, and in the end many a viewer will find him or herself in tears. Truly, this is a play that benefits from multiple viewings.

Given a few of Hollinger’s choices, most notably his decision to use an exchange between Woolsey and Myra to blatantly call attention to the subtextual cleverness of the play’s title, I felt certain that he must have penned Ghost-Writer prior to either An Empty Plate or Opus. As with my prediction that American Idol wouldn’t last a season, I was dead wrong. Ghost-Writer is Hollinger’s latest work, and in light of its delicate yet formidable narrative structure, it may come to be considered one of his best.

With Ghost-Writer, Director Josh Hartwell, Norman, Hunt, Sandoe and the rest of BETC’s crew have crafted a haunting piece of theatrical brilliance.

Viewed only on its surface or delved into deeply, Ghost-Writer will leave you counting the days until BETC’s next offering.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com

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Boulder Weekly

André Lyager

Thursday, February 7 music Curley Taylor Zydeco Band. 8 p.m. Oskar Blues Grill & Brew, 303 Main St., Lyons, 303823-6685.

Eat the Sun — With Shane Dooley. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303440-4628.

Eliot Lipp — With OG Status, Samples & VS. 9 p.m.

Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-443-3399.

The Feral West. 8 p.m. Jamestown Mercantile, 108 Main St., Jamestown, 303-442-5847.

DAVID ROVICS

Saturday, February 9 music Adam Bodine Trio. 6:30 p.m. St Julien Hotel, 900 Walnut St., Boulder, 720-406-9696.

AT THE GARY BALL MEMORIAL CONCERT FOR A BETTER WORLD, 7:30 P.M. FRIDAY, FEB. 8, AT THE UNITARIAN UNIVERSALIST CHURCH

Big Boi. 9 p.m. Boulder Theater, 2032 14th St., Boulder, 303-786-7030.

The Broken Everlys. 10:30 p.m. D Note, 7519 Grandview Ave., Arvada, 303-463-6683.

Cowboy Dave Honky Tonk Band. 8 p.m.

Oskar Blues Home Made Liquids & Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Dakota Blonde — CD release weekend. 8 p.m.

Swallow Hill Daniels Hall, 71 E. Yale Ave., Denver, 303-777-1003.

Gipsy Moon. 7:30 p.m. Swallow Hill Music Café, 71 E. Yale Ave., Denver, 303-777-1003.

Glitterbox. Conor O’Neill’s, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-1922.

Danny Shafer solo. 4:30 p.m. Oskar Blues Tasty Weasel Tap Room, 1800 Pike Road, Unit B, Longmont, 303-776-1914 x313.

Jahmin Brahmin. 10 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

GoodLuckSpider. 7 p.m. D Note, 7519 Grandview Ave., Arvada, 303-463-6683.

Jesse Garland Show. 6:30 p.m. St Julien Hotel, 900 Walnut St., Boulder, 720-406-9696.

The Goonies. Conor O’Neill’s, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-1922.

Kort McCumber solo. 5:30 p.m. Oskar Blues Home Made Liquids & Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Highway 36. 10 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

Open Mic. 7 p.m. The Dickens Tavern, 300 Main St., Longmont, 303-834-9384.

SEE FULL EVENT LISTINGS ONLINE, INCLUDING HAPPY HOURS. To have an event considered for the calendar, send information to calendar@ boulderweekly.com.

Please be sure to include address, date, time and phone number associated with each event. The deadline for consideration is Thursday at noon the week prior to publication.

Boulder Weekly does not guarantee the publication of any event.

Robert Wilson Blues. 7:30 p.m. Boulder Outlook Hotel and Suites, 800 28th St., Boulder, 303-443-3322.

Wandering Natives. 7:30 p.m. Nissi’s, 2675 N. Park Drive, Lafayette, 303-665-2757.

events Bad Apples or Bad Leaders: Explaining State Repression and Sexual Violence in El Salvador — With Michele Leiby, assistant professor of political science at College of Wooster. 12:30 p.m. Institute of Behavioral Science Room 155, 1440 15th St., Boulder, lbdv@colorado.edu.

Colorado Green Building Guild Brown Bag Series: 2013 EE Incentives & Rebate Round Up. 12 p.m. REI Community Room, 1789 28th St., Boulder, Megan@bgbg.org.

Coworking Sampler. 9 a.m. Boulder Digital Arts, 1600 Range St. #100, Boulder, 303-800-4647.

Fundraiser for Pi Lambda Chi Latina Sorority. 9 p.m. Shine, 2027 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-0120.

Jonathan Mooney — Writer and activist on neurodiversity and cognitive differences in education. 7:30 p.m.

Boulder Valley Christian Church, 7100 S. Boulder Road, Boulder, 303-604-6512.

Polar Bottle Red Cross Benefit Bottle Launch Party — An evening benefit for the American Red Cross. 5 p.m. West Flanders Brewing Co., 1125 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-447-BREW. Soup for the Soul — To benefit Porter Hospice patients and St. Anthony Hospital. 5:30-9 p.m. Sheraton Denver Downtown Hotel, 1550 Court Pl., Denver, 303-561-5790.

Friday, February 8 music

Chris Malley & Bob Schlesinger Quartet. 8 p.m.

The Laughing Goat, 1790 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-4404628.

The Cirque Side of the Moon — Voodoo Mardi Gras Masquerade with Moth Poetic Circus. 7 p.m. Casselman’s, 2620 Walnut St., Denver, 720-242-8923.

Dakota Blonde — CD release weekend. 8 p.m. Swallow Hill Daniels Hall, 71 E. Yale Ave., Denver, 303-7771003.

The Damn Sasquatch. 7 p.m. D Note, 7519 Grandview Ave., Arvada, 303-463-6683.

El Ten Eleven — With Slow Magic & Alex Klinger. 9 p.m.

Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-443-3399.

The Firing Line. 6 p.m. Jamestown Mercantile, 108 Main St., Jamestown, 303-442-5847.

Français Fantastique — With Boulder Symphony. 7 p.m. First Presbyterian Church, 1850 15th St., Boulder, 970-577-1550.

Blind Child. 8 p.m. The Dickens Tavern, 300 Main St., Longmont, 303-834-9384.

Gasoline Lollipops — With Robert Rhu and Broken Everlys. 8:30 p.m. Shine, 2027 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-0120.

Blue Krewe. 8 p.m. Oskar Blues Home Made Liquids & Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-4859400.

Grant Farm — Feat. Keith Moseley, with Frogs Gone Fishin’ & Gypsy Moon. 9 p.m. Boulder Theater, 2032 14th St., Boulder, 303-786-7030.

Brad Upton Quartet. 7:30 p.m. Caffè Sole, 637R S. Broadway, Boulder, 303-499-2985.

Highwater. Conor O’Neill’s, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-1922.

Boulder Weekly

Katey Laurel. 5 p.m. D Note, 7519 Grandview Ave., Arvada, 303-463-6683.

Kurt Bauer & Andy Bauer — An Evening of Tuvan Throat Singing. 8 p.m. Swallow Hill Tuft Theatre, 71 E. Yale Ave., Denver, 303-777-1003.

Lunar Light Parade & The Whisky Agreement.

9:30 p.m. D Note, 7519 Grandview Ave., Arvada, 303-463-6683.

Quemandita. 7 p.m. St Julien Hotel, 900 Walnut St., Boulder, 720-406-9696.

Rachel and the Ruckus. 10 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

Sammy Dee. 8 p.m. Boulder Outlook Hotel and Suites, 800 28th St., Boulder, 303-443-3322.

Something Underground. 7:30 p.m. Nissi’s, 2675 N. Park Drive, Lafayette, 303-665-2757.

The Yawpers. 8 p.m. Oskar Blues Grill & Brew, 303 Main St., Lyons, 303-823-6685.

events Gary Ball Memorial Concert For a Better World — A concert featuring David Rovics, with Laurie Dameron, Elena Klaver and David Merritt. 7:30 p.m. Unitarian Universalist Church, 5001 Pennsylvania Ave., Boulder, 303-444-6981.

Women of the Village by Judy Wahlberg — Art reception. 6 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1790 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-4628.

3399.

I’m With Her — Feat. Angie Stevens and Haley Rydell. 8:30 p.m. D Note, 7519 Grandview Ave., Arvada, 303-463-6683.

Ivy Rowe. 8 p.m. Jamestown Mercantile, 108 Main St., Jamestown, 303-442-5847.

Jazzebel. 7:30 p.m. Caffè Sole, 637R S. Broadway, Boulder, 303499-2985.

Mekit & Quinn. 8 p.m. Chautauqua Auditorium, 900 Baseline Rd., Boulder, 303-442-3282.

Mountain Standard Time — Feat. Jeff Austin, with Dead Winter Carpenters. 9 p.m. Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-443-

Ricky Earl — With Cherise. 8 p.m. Boulder Outlook Hotel and Suites, 800 28th St., Boulder, 303-4433322.

Sympathy for the Devil — A tribute to the Rolling Stones. 7:30 p.m. Nissi’s, 2675 N. Park Drive, Lafayette, 303-665-2757.

Steve Smith & The Hard Road Trio. 8 p.m. Swallow Hill Tuft Theatre, 71 E. Yale Ave., Denver, 303-777-1003.

Winchester Holiday — With Drew Schofield. 8 p.m.

The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-4404628.

events Angel Organics Fundraiser. 7 p.m. Shine, 2027 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-0120.

Chinese New Year — With Chinese Student and Scholar Association. 6:30 p.m. Glenn Miller Ballroom, CU campus, Boulder, 303-507-3800.

Chocolate Affair — Presented by the Arvada Festivals Commission. Includes chocolate tasting, treasure hunt and cookie contest. 11 a.m. – 3 p.m. Olde Town Arvada, 303-420-6100.

The Chocolate Lover’s Fling — Chocolate, wine, beer and cheese tasting to benefit Safehouse Progressive Alliance. 5:30-11 p.m. UCAR Events Center, 3040 Center see EVENTS Page 40

February 7, 2013 39

events

Theatrical Costumes, Etc!

ROSES

David Maisel’s Black Maps features photographs of copper, gold and silver mines in the West.

for our

Customers!

6 DAYS OF LOVE TIL’ VALENTINE’S DAY

Theatrical Costumes Etc! Theatrical Costumes Etc #2 669 S. Broadway, Boulder 695 S. Broadway, Boulder 303-494-1770 303-440-8515 theatricalcostumesetc.com Check our videos on costumesetc.com

Abandoned — Photography

by Mark Ivins. The Longmont Museum and Cultural Center, 400 Quail Road, Longmont, 303-651-8374. Through Feb. 17.

arts

ONE ROSE PER CUSTOMER WILL BE GIVEN TO SHOW OUR THANKS!

Alchemy — Bronze sculptures

by Kerry Cannon. Andrew J. Macky Gallery, Macky Auditorium, 1595 Pleasant St., Boulder, 303-492-4247.

Through March 24.

Art of the State — Featuring 160 Colorado artists. Arvada Center for the Arts and Humanities, 6901 Wadsworth Blvd., Arvada, 720898-7255. Through March 31.

Black Maps — A solo show by David Maisel. CU Art Museum, 1085 18th St., Boulder, 303-4928300. Artist/curator conversation at 6:30 p.m. on Feb. 8 in the ATLAS Building, room 100, CU campus. Through May 11.

Chief Niwot: Legend & Legacy. Boulder History Museum, 1206 Euclid Ave., Boulder, 303-4493464. Through Feb. 10.

From Cherry Blossoms to Snow Gardens — Japanese prints. CU Art Museum, 1085 18th St.,

Boulder, 303-492-8300. Through March 23.

Ira Upin, Erik Geschke and Aspen Hochhalter. Dairy Center for the Arts, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-444-7328. Through Feb. 26.

Joining Forces: Book Arts in Collaboration — With Kitty Maryatt and Sammy Lee. Norlin Library East Lobby and West Lobby, CU campus, Boulder, ucblibraries.colorado.edu. Through March 8.

Laura Letinsky: Still Life Photographs, 1997-2012. Denver Art Museum, 100 W. 14th Ave. Pkwy., Denver, 720-865-5000. Through March 24.

Out West: Photographs by Loretta YoungGautier. The Byers-Evans House Gallery, 1310 Bannock St., Denver, 303-620-4933. Through Feb. 23.

Primal Seen — Selections from the CU photography collection. CU Art Museum, 1085 18th St., Boulder, 303-492-8300. Through June 22.

Resonance — Solo exhibition by Greeley sculptor Hee-Hun Cho. Muse Gallery, 356 Main St., Longmont, 303-678-7869. Through Feb. 23.

Rethinking Western — Contemporary artists on the American West. Gallery 1261, 1261 Delaware St., Denver, 888-626-1261. Through Feb. 23.

EVENTS from Page 39 Green Drive, Boulder, www.safehousealliance.org.

Couple’s Valentine Boot Camp Class — Free. 8:30 a.m. Frequent Flyer Aerial Dance Studio, 3022 E. Sterling Circle #150, Boulder, 303-550-3491.

How to Make Money with Your Photography in Your Spare Time. 10 a.m. Boulder Digital Arts, 1600 Range St. #100, Boulder, 303-800-4647.

Mardi Gras Ball — With music by Hazel Miller. 6 p.m.

Beaver Run Resort, 620 Village Road, Breckenridge, 877864-0868.

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Playback Theatre West: A Night of Improvisational Theatre. 8 p.m. The Dairy Center for the Arts, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826.

Ed & Gordy from The Band of Heathens. 4 p.m.

Oskar Blues Grill & Brew, 303 Main St., Lyons, 303823-6685.

In Flames — With Demon Hunter, All Shall Perish & Battlecross. 7:30 p.m. Boulder Theater, 2032 14th St., Boulder, 303-786-7030.

Joel Katchel, Beth Preston and Luke Redfield.

8 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-4628.

La Maquinaria Cubana. 8 p.m. Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-443-3399.

Mello Cello Sundays — With Sam Rae. 7:30 p.m.

Shine, 2027 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-0120.

Romeo & Juliet — With Opera Colorado. 7:30 p.m. Ellie Caulkins Opera House, Denver Performing Arts Complex, 14th and Curtis, Denver, 303-468-2030.

Peek Performances Duo — With Susie Peek. 3 p.m.

Boulder Public Library Meadows Branch, 4800 Baseline Rd., Boulder, 303-441-4390.

Vertical Fusion Burlesque Show. 8 p.m. Dickens Opera House, 300 Main St., Longmont, 303-834-9384.

PJ Hahn. 4 p.m. D Note, 7519 Grandview Ave., Arvada, 303-463-6683.

Women of the West Group. 10 a.m. Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Prairie Scholars. 6 p.m. Oskar Blues Home Made Liquids & Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Sunday, February 10 music Acoustic Jam. 3 p.m. Conor O’Neill’s, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-1922.

Big Pick Bluegrass & Folk Jam. 8 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

Bluegrass Pick. 12 p.m. Oskar Blues Home Made Liquids & Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Blues Jam — With Heavy Cats. 7:30 p.m. Boulder Outlook Hotel and Suites, 800 28th St., Boulder, 303443-3322.

Diamond Jubilee All-Stars — With Shane Provost.

4 p.m. Swallow Hill Daniels Hall, 71 E. Yale Ave., Denver, 303-777-1003.

Wendy Woo Band — Presented by Blue Sky Bridge Child & Family Advocacy Center. 5 p.m. Nissi’s, 2675 N. Park Drive, Lafayette, 303-665-2757.

events Cupid’s Arrow — With Stories on Stage. 1:30 p.m. and 6:30 p.m. Su Teatro Cultural and Performing Arts Center, 721 Santa Fe Drive, Denver, 303-494-0523.

New Moon Women’s Circle. 2-4 p.m. Adi Shakti Kundalini Yoga Center of Boulder, 2014 Pearl St., Boulder, 720-252-3962.

Storytelling for the Young at Heart: Tales for Winter.

2 p.m. Caffè Sole, 637R S. Broadway, Boulder, 303-4992985.

Boulder Weekly

music Electric Blues Jam. 7:30 p.m. Oskar Blues Home Made Liquids & Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Feed Me With Teeth — With Mord Fustang. 8:30 p.m. Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-4433399.

Old Time Music Pick — With K.C. Groves. 7 p.m.

Oskar Blues Grill & Brew, 303 Main St., Lyons, 303823-6685.

Open Mic Night. 7 p.m. D Note, 7519 Grandview Ave., Arvada, 303-463-6683.

Romano Paoletti’s Open Stage. 6 p.m. Oskar Blues Tasty Weasel Tap Room, 1800 Pike Road, Unit B, Longmont, 303-776-1914 x313.

theater

Monday, February 11

42nd Street. Boulder’s Dinner Theater, 5501 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-449-6000.

Through Feb. 13.

Once Upon a Mattress is a musical remake of the Hans Christian Anderson fairy tale “The Princess and the Pea.”

Ed, Downloaded — Presented by the Denver Center Theatre Company. Denver Performing Arts Complex, 14th and Curtis streets, Denver, 303-893-4100. Through Feb. 17.

Ghost-Writer — Presented by Boulder Ensemble Theatre Company. Dairy Center for the Arts, 2590 Walnut St., Boulder, 303-440-7826. Through Feb. 16.

Grace, or the Art of Climbing — Presented by the Denver Center Theatre Company. Denver Performing

Arts Complex, 14th and Curtis streets, Denver, 303893-4100. Through Feb. 17.

Hard Times. Nomad Theatre, 1410 Quince Ave., Boulder, 303-440-4510. Through Feb. 10.

Jekyll & Hyde. Denver Performing Arts Complex, 14th and Curtis streets, Denver, 303-893-4100. Through Feb. 10.

Maple and Vine. Curious Theatre, 1080 Acoma St., Denver, 303-623-0524. Through Feb. 23.

Once Upon a Mattress. Lakewood Cultural Center and Performance Now Theatre Company, Lakewood Cultural

events Center, 470 S. Allison Pkwy., Lakewood, 303-987-7845.

Over the Tavern. Longmont Theatre Company, 513 Main St., Longmont, 303-772-5200. Through Feb. 9.

Romeo and Juliet — Presented by the Denver Center Theatre Company. Denver Performing Arts Complex, 14th and Curtis streets, Denver, 303-893-4100. Through Feb. 24.

Taking Stock — With 11 Minute Theatre Company. The Festival Playhouse, 5665 Olde Wadsworth Blvd., Arvada, 303-422-4090. Through Feb. 17.

The Unsinkable Molly Brown. Candlelight Dinner Playhouse, 4747 Marketplace Dr., Johnstown, 970-744-3747.

Through March 30.

events A Good Man. 6:30 p.m. Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Auditions for Dividing the Estate. 9 a.m. – 5 p.m.

Arvada Center for the Arts and Humanities, 6901 Wadsworth Blvd., Arvada, 720-898-7200.

Naturally Boulder — Networking night. 5:30 p.m.

Nissi’s, 2675 N. Park Drive, Lafayette, 303-665-2757.

Tuesday, February 12 music Fat Tuesday Celebration — With Jockamo. 8 p.m.

Oskar Blues Grill & Brew, 303 Main St., Lyons, 303823-6685.

Fat Tuesday Celebration — With The Potcheen. 7 p.m. Oskar Blues Home Made Liquids & Solids, 1555 S. Hover Road, Longmont, 303-485-9400.

Jimkata & Jon Wayne and the Pain — With Digital Beat Down. 9 p.m. Fox Theatre, 1135 13th St., Boulder, 303-443-3399.

Mardi Gras Party — With Zydecoasters. 10 p.m.

Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-2587733.

Open Stage. 8 p.m. Conor O’Neill’s, 1922 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-1922.

Pete Kartsounes Soulo Loop. 6 p.m. The Dickens Tavern, 300 Main St., Longmont, 303-834-9384.

The Thurston Group. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-4628.

events BIJA — Barefoot Dance. 7:30 p.m. The Avalon, 6185 Arapahoe Rd., Boulder, www.bijaboulder.com.

Introduction to Digital Photography. 6 p.m. Boulder Digital Arts, 1600 Range St. #100, Boulder, 303-8004647.

Main Library Renovation Community Input Vision Meeting. 6:30 p.m. Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Progressive Women of Colorado Forum — With Paddy McClelland on “Climate Change: Facts & Solutions.” 11:30 a.m. Unity Church of Denver, 3021 S. University Blvd., Denver, 303-587-6139.

Romeo & Juliet — With Opera Colorado. 7:30 p.m. Ellie Caulkins Opera House, Denver Performing Arts Complex, 14th and Curtis, Denver, 303-468-2030.

Steve O’Neill — Stand up comedy. 7:30 p.m. D Note, 7519 Grandview Ave., Arvada, 303-463-6683.

Women Leading Green — With author and environmentalist Hunter Lovins, GoLite co-founder Kim Coupounas and Bhakti Chai CEO Brook Eddy. 5:30 p.m. Sterling Rice Group, 1801 13th St., Boulder, 303-807-1042.

Wednesday, February 13 music The Boulder Blues Trio. 7:30 p.m. Caffè Sole, 637R S. Broadway, Boulder, 303-499-2985.

Blues Jam — With The Firebreathers. 10 p.m. Pioneer Inn, 15 E. First St., Nederland, 303-258-7733.

Blues Jam hosted by Todd Johnson. 8 p.m. D see EVENTS Page 42

Boulder Weekly

February 7, 2013 41

400 W. South Boulder Rd. Lafayette Plaza • 303.665.5599 www. herbalwellnesscolorado.com www. facebook.com/herbalwellnesslafayette

words

events Matt Samet reads from his memoir, Death Grip, on climbing and addiction on Feb. 12 at the Boulder Book Store.

Thursday, February 7 Hannah Allen — Poetry reading. 7 p.m. Innisfree Poetry Bookstore & Cafe, 1203 13th St., Suite A, Boulder, 303-579-1644.

The Last Outlaws: The Lives and Legends of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid — by Thom Hatch. 7:30 p.m. Tattered Cover, 1628 16th St., Denver, 303-436-1070.

Ski Town Soups — by Jennie Iverson.

7:30 p.m. Boulder Book Store, 1107 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-447-2074.

Friday, February 8 PBJ Friday. 7 p.m. Innisfree Poetry Bookstore & Cafe, 1203 13th St., Suite A, Boulder, 303-579-1644.

Sunday, February 10 Circle of Care — An open mic with Circle of Care Elder Enrichment, themed “Love in all its forms.” 3 p.m. Innisfree Poetry Bookstore & Cafe, 1203 13th St., Suite A, Boulder, 303-579-1644.

Monday, February 11 Between the Covers: An Evening for Bookclubs — Refreshments, gifts and a

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gathering of publisher representatives and booksellers. 7 p.m. Boulder Book Store, 1107 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-447-2074.

So, You’re a Poet? — Pre-Valentine’s Anti-Valentine’s Day open reading “Down with Love.” 7 p.m. The Laughing Goat Coffee House, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-4628.

Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking — by Susan Cain. 7:30 p.m. Tattered Cover, 1628 16th St., Denver, 303-436-1070.

Tuesday, February 12 Animal, Mineral, Radical: Essays on Wildlife, Family, and Food — by BK Loren. 7:30 p.m. Tattered Cover, 1628 16th St., Denver, 303-436-1070.

Death Grip: A Climber’s Escape from Benzo Madness — by Matt Samet. 7:30 p.m. Boulder Book Store, 1107 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-447-2074.

Living Poets Society Poetry Bookclub — On Slow Lightning, by Eduardo Corral.

7 p.m. Boulder Book Store, 1107 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-447-2074.

Weekly Open Reading. 7 p.m. Innisfree Poetry Bookstore & Cafe, 1203 13th St., Suite A, Boulder, 303-579-1644.

EVENTS from Page 41 Note, 7519 Grandview Ave., Arvada, 303-463-6683.

Bonzo Terks. 8 p.m. The Laughing Goat, 1709 Pearl St., Boulder, 303-440-4628.

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Cleason Dunn Write. 6 p.m. The Dickens Tavern, 300 Main St., Longmont, 303-834-9384 Delta Sonics Blues Jam. 7:30 p.m. Nissi’s, 2675 N. Park Drive, Lafayette, 303-665-2757.

Habib Koite & Eric Bibb: Brothers in Bamako & Memphis. 8 p.m. Boulder Theater, 2032 14th St., Boulder, 303-786-7030.

Friday Storytime. 10:15 a.m. Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Saturday, February 9 Mad Science: Fire and Ice — Discover the cool chemistry in the states of matter and learn the basics of air pressure. 11 a.m. Boulder Public Library George Reynolds Branch, 3595 Table Mesa Dr., Boulder, 303-441-3120. & 3 p.m. Boulder Public Library Meadows Branch, 4800 Baseline Rd., Boulder, 303-441-4390.

Sunday, February 10

Simon Townsend of The Who — Solo acoustic. 8 p.m. Swallow Hill Walnut Room, 3131 Walnut St., Denver, 303-777-1003.

Annual Boulder Bach Festival’s Kids For Bach.

2 p.m. Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Thom Sandrock. 6:30 p.m. St Julien Hotel, 900 Walnut St., Boulder, 720-406-9696.

Colorado’s Sweethearts — Nature for kids & parents.

On the great horned owl. 1 p.m. Chautauqua Ranger Cottage, 900 Baseline Road, Boulder, www.naturehikes.org.

events BED Talks — A Series on Women and Sex. 7:15 p.m.

Shine, 2027 13th St., Boulder, 303-449-0120.

Expert Talk with Olinka Vistica and Drazen Grubisic, founders of the Museum of Broken Relationships.

6:30 p.m. Art Students League of Denver, 200 Grant St., Denver, 303-778-6990.

Monday, February 11 Monday Storytime. 10:15 a.m. Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Silly, Goofy and Weird — Story time and children’s hike.

10 a.m. Chautauqua Ranger Cottage, 900 Baseline Road, Boulder, www.naturehikes.org.

KIDS CALENDAR

Tuesday, February 12

Thursday, February 7

Bilingual Spanish/English Storytime. 10:15 a.m.

Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

No Dogs Allowed — A children’s theater production. 10 a.m. and 12 p.m. Tuesday through Friday. Arvada Center for the Arts and Humanities, 6901 Wadsworth Blvd., Arvada, 720-898-7200 Thursday Storytime. 10:15 a.m. Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Friday, February 8 Family Game Night at Meadows. 4 p.m. Boulder Public Library Meadows Branch, 4800 Baseline Rd., Boulder, 303-441-4390.

Read to the Dog. 3:30 p.m. Boulder Public Library Meadows Branch, 4800 Baseline Rd., Boulder, 303441-4390.

Zumbatomic for Kids — Dance Fitness for Kids. 4 p.m., The Avalon, 6185 Arapahoe Rd., Boulder, 303604-9098

Wednesday, February 13 Reading Buddies. 4:30 p.m. Boulder Public Library, 1001 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder, 303-441-3100.

Boulder Weekly

Boulder Weekly

February 7, 2013 43

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Boulder Weekly

screen Holy Frenchman, Batman ‘Holy Motors’ is the weirdest film you will ever see and love

by David Accomazzo

T

here’s a moment in Holy Motors when Monsieur Merde, a dirty leprechaunlooking man in a tattered green suit with scraggly red hair, approaches the fringes of a highfashion photo shoot. The photographer is grunting, “Beauty, beauty!” with perverse glee at his model, until he sees the good Monsieur. He pauses and then redirects his camera, and excitedly proclaims, “Weird, weird! He’s so weird!”

That about sums up my feelings towards Holy Motors, by French director Leos Carax. It is a bizarre and bewildering journey through the twisted imagination of its director/screenwriter. And it’s fun as hell, one of the most mesmerizing and unusual films I’ve ever seen.

In the opening scene, a blind man stumbles out of bed over to a wall. He feels around for a secret keyhole, which he unlocks with his middle finger, which happens to be a key. The sound of gulls by the ocean comes in from nowhere.

Then he’s in a theater.

And that’s just the first five minutes of the film. It gets no less weird.

Holy Motors tells the story of Monsieur Oscar (Denis Lavant), an actor of sorts who is driven via white limousine to various “appointments,” applying costume makeup for each one.

We first glimpse Oscar as he leaves his mansion for his limousine and takes a phone call to discuss the urgent need for more bodyguards. Nothing is suspect until he uncovers a vanity in the back of the limousine and starts brushing the long gray hair of a wig. When we next see him emerge, he is a decrepit beggar woman, pitifully begging for alms on the street.

We follow Oscar throughout his day as he attends to appointment after appointment. At one, he wears a motion-capture suit and graphically dryhumps a leather-clad contortionist.

Then, he picks up a young girl from a party and scolds her when he catches her in a lie. Later, he leads an accordion-only

marching band through a church.

Turns out, Oscar works for a shadowy corporation only referred to as “The Agency.” His assignments are commissioned scenes being secretly filmed, and Oscar is growing weary of his job.

On one assignment, he enters a hotel and lies on a bed. A woman enters and they proceed to have a teary-eyed, heart-wrenching goodbye. Taken by itself, it would do a number on the heartstrings. In context, it’s absurd and hilarious, which serves as a testament to how thoroughly Carax has mind-fucked you throughout the film. Afterwards, with the woman’s head slumped on his

Diabetes: the real monster

‘Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters’ is insane

by Ryan Syrek

H

ansel ( Jeremy Renner) has diabetes. This is not a throwaway character trait, not a bit of bizarre nuance in a quasi-steampunk re-imagining of a Grimm fairy tale.

The fact that Hansel must stop combating the forces of darkness whenever his wrist-alarmthingie goes off so he can inject himself with insulin is a full-fledged, God’s honest plot point in writer/director Tommy Wirkola’s film. Oh, and Hansel and Gretel don’t have German accents but American ones. Oh, and in the climax a “white witch” fires a Gatling gun filled with magic bullets. Oh, and I think Gretel (Gemma Arterton) wants to get it on with a troll.

Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters is pretty much insane. And maybe it’s supposed to be. Maybe it’s supposed to be outright funny; after all, renowned funnyfolks Will Ferrell and Adam McKay are listed as producers. Intentional or not, it’s somehow vastly watchable. It is brief (88 minutes), has unique character designs for its witch posse and features copious abuse to Peter Stormare’s nose. All “pros” in anyone’s pro/con list.

The story goes that a young Hansel and Gretel Boulder Weekly

were abandoned in the forest by their father and stumbled upon a house made of candy (more on diabetes in a minute). The house was a trap that they escaped by shoving a witch into fire, which apparently they took as career counseling. Fast forward a nondescript “many years later,” and the brother and sister (who are a wee bit too “Leia and Luke” for comfort at times) are roaming witch murderers.

They do this for money, which is silly because they have invented machine guns and apparently diagnosed and treated Hansel’s “sugar sickness” with home-made insulin, so they could probably find non-witch-murdering work if they wanted. When they stumble upon evil super-witch Muriel (Famke Janssen) they discover secrets about their past and tangle with the most dangerous non-candy-based danger they have ever faced.

Give Hansel and Gretel this much: It goes for it.

From dudes who explode because they have eaten too

torso, Oscar politely excuses himself and leaves.

When you think the movie can’t possibly get more absurd, it manages to one-up itself, and does so for nearly two hours. Holy Motors might be a great way to introduce someone to art films. It may be outlandish, indecipherable and ridiculous to a fault, but there’s one thing it’s certainly not: boring.

Holy Motors screens at the International Film Series on Wednesday, Feb. 13, at 7 p.m. and 9:30 p.m.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com

many maggots to inventive and fun ways to disembowel and otherwise harm spellcasters, it relishes in its R-rating. What’s more, Janssen in particular tears into her wicked role as though she had been sitting around waiting for someone to invite her to “HamFisted Acting Prom.”

Renner is, well, Renner; kind of bored, super glowery and sufficiently cool.

Arterton, who is admirably treated as an equal co-protagonist and not a tool to be kidnapped, threatened or killed to motivate Hansel, is equally action-movie adept. Props on a flawless American accent too, even if it makes no sense why she has one.

Hansel and Gretel is just all kinds of dumb. It even engages in the lamest form of 3-D (the kind where things fly right at you). But it is also surprisingly original, completely self-aware and impressively light on its feet.

Do not take this as a begrudging recommendation so much as an acknowledgement a good time was had … a shame-filled, idiotic good time.

—This review first appeared in The Reader of Omaha, Neb. Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com

February 7, 2013 45

reel to reel

For a list of local movie times, visit boulderweekly.com/ movie-times.html

AMELIE

LES MISERABLES

Amélie is a fanciful comedy from Jean-Pierre Jeunet. He invokes his incomparable visionary style to capture the exquisite charm and mystery of modern-day Paris through the eyes of a beautiful ingenue (Audrey Tautou). At Esquire. — Landmark Theatres

Hugh Jackman gives his all as Jean Valjean, the unluckiest bread thief in history. Russell Crowe’s Javert and Anne Hathaway’s Fantine are also great. Unfortunately, director Tom Hooper filmed the beloved stage classic in extreme close-up, making for a hideous, excruciating endeavor. Rated PG-13. At Century, Colony Square and Twin Peaks. — The Reader of Omaha, Neb.

AMOUR

Georges and Anne are a couple in their 80s about to experience the perils of mortality.

When Anne begins sliding downward through dementia, Georges is left to try to pick up the pieces. Rated PG-13. At Century and Chez Artiste. — The Reader of Omaha, Neb.

LIFE OF PI 3D A storm ravages a boat carrying a zookeeper’s family and menagerie, and the only survivors are the family’s son, Pi, and a Bengal tiger. Shot in 3-D, the film is a visual feast.

Rated PG. At Century and Colony Square.

— The Reader of Omaha, Neb.

ANNA KARENINA Leo Tolstoy’s novel of love and infidelity comes to life thanks to director Joe Wright. A unique narrative device illuminates the theatrical behavior of randy Russian nobles who can’t help trying to sleep with each other’s spouses. Rated R. At Chez Artiste. — The Reader of Omaha, Neb.

IDENTITY THIEF

More money doesn’t really make for more problems, unless it’s not your money and the guy who’s money it is comes after you. And then — these filmmakers hope — it makes for funny problems.

ARGO Ben Affleck’s latest directing project (in which he also stars) is based on true events from the Iranian revolution in 1979.

Militants storm the U.S. embassy and take 52 Americans hostage. Rated R. At Esquire.

BATTLESHIP POTEMKIN Since its 1925 unveiling at Moscow’s Bolshoi Theater, Potemkin’s shockingly modern form has overshadowed its content so much that instead of fomenting worldwide Socialist revolution, it touched off a global revolution in filmmaking. At Boedecker. — Boedecker Theater BEASTS OF THE SOUTHERN WILD In a forgotten but defiant bayou community, a 6-year-old girl exists on the brink of orphanhood. Buoyed by her childish optimism, she believes that the natural world is in balance with the universe until a fierce storm changes her reality. At SIE FilmCenter. — Denver Film Society BROKEN CITY The mayor of New York City (Russell Crowe) hires a former cop (Mark Wahlberg) to spy on his wife. The private eye uncovers a scandal much larger than an extramarital affair. Rated R. At Colony Square and Twin Peaks.

BULLET TO THE HEAD Sylvester Stallone plays a hitman who unites efforts with a cop when both have a similar mission: bringing down their partners’ killers. Rated R. At Century, Colony Square and Twin Peaks.

DJANGO UNCHAINED Quentin Tarantino does to slave owners what he did to Nazis in Inglourious Basterds, taking therapeutic cinematic revenge upon them with Django, a freed slave. He and his partner, Dr. King Schultz, attempt to rescue Django’s wife. Rated R. At Century and Colony Square. — The Reader of Omaha, Neb. 46 February 7, 2013

HANSEL AND GRETEL: WITCH HUNTERS See full review on page 45. Rated R. At Century, Colony Square and Twin Peaks.

A HAUNTED HOUSE In the vein of the Scary Movie series he helped create, Marlon Wayans stars in this parody of found-footage haunted house films like Paranormal Activity and The Devil Inside. Rated R. At Twin Peaks.

THE HOBBIT: AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY 3D This adaptation of J.R.R. Tolkien’s original tale of hobbits and wizards is every bit as good as the Lord of the Rings series (and is, in some ways, even better). Rated PG-13. At Century and Twin Peaks. — The Reader of Omaha, Neb. HOLY MOTORS See full review on page 45. At Muenzinger Auditorium.

HOW TO SURVIVE A PLAGUE This Oscar-nominated documentary is an in-depth, riveting account of a small group of people who made a crucial impact on the recognition of and treatments of HIV/ AIDS. We follow the lead players of ACT UP and TAG from the early ’80s to present day. At Boedecker. — Boedecker Theater HYDE PARK ON HUDSON In June 1939 the King and Queen of England stay overnight at President Franklin Delano Roosevelt’s country estate in upstate New York. This was the first visit of an English monarch to America. Rated R. At Chez Artiste. — Landmark Theatres IDENTITY THIEF The director of Horrible Bosses returns with

the story of Sandy Patterson (Jason Bateman), who heads to Florida to find the woman who is living extravagantly off of his money after stealing his identity. Rated R. At Century, Colony Square and Twin Peaks.

THE IMPOSSIBLE Setting aside the oddly xenophobic premise that allows a horrific event, a 2004 tsunami, suffered by the entirety of Eastern Asia to be filtered through a decidedly Western lens, this is a beautiful-looking survival tale.

Rated PG-13. At Century, Colony Square and Mayan. — The Reader of Omaha, Neb. THE INVISIBLE WAR The Department of Defense estimates there were 19,000 violent sex crimes in the military in 2010. The Invisible War exposes the epidemic. At SIE FilmCenter.

— Denver Film Society KNIFE FIGHT

If a political candidate is personally flawed, but stands to make a positive difference in millions of lives, would you help him win?

That question looms over the life of Paul Turner, a savvy strategist maneuvering politicians out of scandal and into public office.

At SIE FilmCenter. — Denver Film Society LA SCALA’S DON CARLO A rich, nuanced score and a complex, emotional story: Don Carlo is Verdi’s ultimate drama. This production, captured live at opening night of La Scala, stars opera greats Ferruccio Furlanetto, Stuart Neill, Fiorenza Cedolins, and Dolora Zajick. At Boedecker.

— Boedecker Theater

LINCOLN This is all about the creation of the penny.

OK, kidding. This is Daniel Day-Lewis proving he’s the best there is (maybe ever) at embodying the emancipatory president as he works to get the 13th Amendment through a divided Congress in the midst of war. Rated PG-13. At Century and Colony Square. — The Reader of Omaha, Neb. MAMA Five years after they disappeared, sisters Victoria and Lilly are found in a half-collapsed cabin in the woods. But when they come to civilization to live with their relatives, the girls don’t come alone. Rated PG-13. At Twin Peaks.

THE MASTER

The Master tells the story of a veteran who arrives home from war and is tantalized by The Cause and its charismatic leader. At SIE FilmCenter. — Denver Film Society MOVIE 43 The biggest ensemble cast in history carries this comedy about three kids searching for a banned video. Rated R. At Colony Square and Twin Peaks.

OSCAR-NOMINATED SHORT FILMS 2013: ANIMATED Featuring all five Academy Award nominees in the category of Best Animated Short and more, this year’s program will be hosted by last year’s winners, directors William Joyce and Brandon Oldenburg. At Mayan. — Landmark Theatres OSCAR-NOMINATED SHORT FILMS 2013: LIVE ACTION Featuring all five Academy Award nominees in the category of Best Live Action Short, this year’s program will be hosted by last year’s winner: Luke Matheny, writer/director of “God of Love.” At Mayan. — Landmark Theatres

A LATE QUARTET

PARKER

The quartet returns for an “encore” at The Boe for more classical drama, starring Philip Seymour Hoffman, Christopher Walken and Catherine Keener. Rated R. At Boedecker. — Boedecker Theater

Jason Statham stars as a criminal with a troubling past but a strict code of ethics who finds a perfectly valid reason to fire a gun a bunch of times. Rated R. At Century, Colony Square and Twin Peaks.

Boulder Weekly

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SIDE EFFECTS PETER GABRIEL: NEW BLOOD Performing live with the 46 piece New Blood Orchestra, this London concert mixes cover versions from his Scratch My Back album with classic tracks from across his solo career. At Boedecker. — Boedecker Theater PHANTASM II The “Tall Man” and his strange little Killer Sphere return for a second round in this sequel to the 1979 cult favorite. Mike Pearson (James LeGros) is still plagued by memories of the Tall Man (Angus Scrimm), an evil mortician who has risen from the grave. This film is part of The Watching Hour series at SIE FilmCenter. — Denver Film Society QUARTET The rumor circling the halls at Beecham House is that a star is coming to the home.

For Reginald Paget, Wilfred Bond and Cecily Robson, this talk is par for the course. But they’re in for a shock when the new arrival is none other than their former singing partner. Rated PG-13.

At Century and Esquire. — Landmark Theatres THE RABBI’S CAT Based on the best-selling graphic novel by Joann Sfar, The Rabbi’s Cat tells the story of a rabbi and his talking cat – a sharptongued feline philosopher brimming with scathing humor and a less than pure love for the rabbi’s voluptuous teenage daughter. At SIE FilmCenter. — Denver Film Society THE ROOM

As the film depicts friendships and relationships in the lives of its five major characters, it raises life’s real and most-asked question: “Can you really trust anyone?” A midnight cult sensation, this quirky black comedy has been running for over 10 years in Los Angeles.

At Esquire. — Landmark Theatres SAMSARA Samsara is a composition in film and music.

The assemblage doesn’t tell a literal story, but there is a story arc. The film has about 18 discrete segments, each joined with surprising or inspired segues. At Muenzinger Auditorium. — International Film Series SEARCHING FOR SUGAR MAN How is it possible that a musician could bomb with two albums in the U.S., disappear into obscurity for years and then be resurrected as a successful, inspirational hero in a totally different country? At Mayan. — Landmark Theatres THE SESSIONS Based on the autobiographical writings of journalist and poet Mark O’Brien, The Sessions tells the story of a man confined to an iron lung who is determined — at age 38 — to lose his virginity. Rated R. At Chez Artiste. — Landmark Theatres Boulder Weekly

For this psychological thriller, director Steven Soderbergh and Contagion writer Scott Burns examine the tendency to overmedicate psychological issues. A depressed 28-year-old Manhattanite rotates through medications before landing on one with a side effect of “parasomnia” that leads to a grisly crime. Rated R. At Century, Colony Square and Twin Peaks.

SILVER LININGS PLAYBOOK When Pat is released from institutionalization after beating his wife’s lover, he meets Tiffany, a young widow struggling with grief.

Although the film has the trappings of drama, everything is sanitized and clichéd enough to make this a feel-good romance between attractive people. Rated R. At Century, Colony Square and Twin Peaks. — The Reader of Omaha, Neb.

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SISTER Simon and Louise (Kacey Mottet Klein and Léa Seydoux) live at the foot of a mountain, near the ski resort up top. Simon steals ski equipment while Louise hunts for a rich boyfriend. At Muenzinger Auditorium. — International Film Series STAND UP GUYS Three retired gangsters (Al Pacino, Christopher Walken and Alan Arkin) are reunited after jail time and a deal gone wrong with a mob boss for a final night out. Rated R. At Century.

STARLET Dree Hemingway stars in this quirky, sweet friendship flick. The paths of an elderly woman and a 20-something free spirit collide when the latter shops at the former’s yard sale. We learn about the power of friendship as each one’s motives are revealed. At Boedecker. — Boedecker Theater WARM BODIES Adding some laughs to the paranormal teen romance genre, Warm Bodies tells the story of unlikely love in the zombie apocolapyse. When zombie R (Nicholas Holt) meets still-human Julie (Teresa Palmer), human feelings begin filling his decayed heart. Rated PG-13. At Century, Colony Square and Twin Peaks.

THE WAITING ROOM A composite 24-hour period at Highland Hospital in Oakland, one of the nation’s busiest emergency rooms, offers an intimate and even uplifting view of how people navigate health care with limited resources.

At Boedecker. — Boedecker Theater ZERO DARK THIRTY Have you heard about the time we shot Osama bin Laden? Have you ever wondered the painstaking decade of research that went into that moment? Well, you’re in for a treat, as Maya (Jessica Chastain), the investigator who broke the case open, searches for bin Laden. Rated R. At Century, Colony Square and Twin Peaks. — The Reader of Omaha, Neb.

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Boulder Weekly

cuisine

B

efore bingo started, the drag queen on the microphone was ready to caution the crowd about safe sex.

But the woman seated front and center with a toddler — who she had brought to a drag queen bingo fundraiser for the Boulder County AIDS Project — was having none of it.

That was how the night started last November for Hayes Burton, drag queen bingo master of ceremonies.

This week, when Burton hosts the event at Alfalfa’s Market once again, he will address a Boulder crowd with deep pockets but sometimes, he says, relatively closed minds.

“Everyone thinks of Boulder as this liberal hotspot, and in some ways, that’s very true. But when it comes to the gay community, there’s a distinct kind of wall that goes up,” he says.

“There are no gay events in town, no gay bar, no place for the gay community to hang out in Boulder,” adds Craig Spalding, graphic designer at Alfalfa’s Market.

So, on Wednesday, Feb. 13, Boulder’s only drag queen bingo (DQB) will take place at Alfalfa’s Market. All proceeds from the event will be donated to the Boulder County AIDS Project (BCAP).

“Sponsor-driven events like these have double the benefit for a nonprof-

Boulder County AIDS Project gets boost from drag queen bingo

by Abby Faires it,” says Elisa Smith, marketing and special events manager at BCAP. “They are fantastic for raising needed funds and bringing the community together.”

This will be the local grocer’s second time sponsoring the event, with the first DQB night held back in November. After the success of the first bingo, Alfalfa’s has announced plans to host the event every three months.

“It is important to all those involved that people know Alfalfa’s is doing this ... It’s Alfalfa’s wanting to help the community and turning to BCAP to ask how we can do that,” says Burton.

Perhaps that’s why the entire DQB operation is being spearheaded by Sara Bruskin, supervisor in the cheese and specialty department at Alfalfa’s.

Bruskin says that the whole idea was sparked from a conversation she

We offer a variety of sandwiches, salads and soups.

We also have specials from diverse cuisines that change daily.

had with Oliver Retzloff, whose father, Mark Retzloff, is co-owner of the store.

“It was an amusing thing to talk about,” says Bruskin, “because it seemed ridiculous and out of the ordinary for a supermarket to do.”

Bruskin says she had previously lived with two gay roommates, one transgendered roommate and one person “who just loved to look at boobs.”

So, it only seemed natural that they had all been going to DQBs in Denver for some time.

“There just really isn’t anywhere in Boulder that does it,” says Bruskin. She estimates that between 60 and 70 people attended the November event.

Raunch is an inevitable part of drag queen bingo, but Alfalfa’s tried to give

Food happenings around town

tidbites

Courtesy of Alfalfa’s

A WEEK OF SPECIAL MENUS

With Valentine’s Day a week away on Feb. 14, and Mardi Gras Feb. 12, Boulder restaurants are lining up special menus. Jax Fish House on West Pearl will have specials for Mardi Gras, including chicken-fried frog legs, gumbo, a crab boil, blackened redfish and shrimp and grits.

Jax will also host a fourcourse meal for Valentine’s Day, offering oysters, scallops, lobster tail, ahi and halibut and ending with a choice of chocolate cake or beignets.

Call 303-444-1811 for reservations for the $55 meal, with $25 optional wine pairing.

At the other end of Pearl, French restaurant Mateo will offer a four-course meal Feb. 14 to celebrate Valentine’s Day. The dinner, scheduled to start at 5, 7:15 and 9:30 p.m., includes choices like quail, venison and scallops; desserts options include carrot cake and chocolate soufflé. The meal costs $75 per person and wine pairing is an additional $50.

FORT COLLINS CONSIDERS EXPANDING SMOKING BAN

City officials in Fort Collins are considering banning smoking on the patios of restaurants and bars after dozens of complaints about the see TIDBITES Page 52

see DRAG QUEEN BINGO Page 52

VALENTINE’S DAY DINNER special menu Call for Reservations

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Monday - Friday 11:00 a.m. - 9:00 p.m. • Saturday 4:00 p.m. - 9:00 p.m. • 1606 Conestoga Street, Suite 3, Boulder • Reservations: 303.442.0585 Boulder Weekly

February 7, 2013 49

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Boulder Weekly

cuisine review The Parkway Cafe 4700 Pearl St., Boulder 303-447-1833

A diner that Jack Reacher would like

L

ong before Tom Cruise portrayed what you’d expect for this kind of homespun Jack Reacher on film, I had been spot. Built on a foundation of iceberg lettuce, reading the popular series of novels it came with such expected ingredients as featuring this ex-military investitomato and cheddar shreds. But it also had a gator’s suspense-filled adventures. few unexpected touches, including a compelReacher, a hulking fellow well over six feet lingly crunchy sunflower seed garnish. tall, (I had always pictured Viggo Mortensen Next up was Keith’s $7.50 Denver omelet. playing him) spends the novels, as my brother puts it, booth, and we were quickly tended to by our amiable However, this egg dish may have been more accu“wandering like Cain.” Part of these books’ considerrately termed an Arvada or Lakewood omelet, as my server. She recited the daily specials, which included able appeal is in their unpredictable plotting, friend swapped out the traditional ham for bacon. a Friday standby, clam chowder. Intrigued, I ordered although a Reacher tale commonly results in uncovRegardless of the ingredients, the eggs were of a $2.95 cup of this New England-style soup, dusted ering dastardly small-town doings. Other recurring remarkably fluffy texture, an indicator of the chef ’s with a light sprinkling of paprika on top for color threads include Reacher’s voracious thirst for coffee, attentiveness — this main ingredient hadn’t gone and cellophane-wrapped saltines on the side. I was and a fondness for “adequate” diner food. rubbery. Diced bell peppers were slightly al dente, pleasantly surprised by this enjoyable preparation, In Nothing to Lose, Reacher has lousy luck finding which had a remarkably pure shellfish taste, not-too- and the bacon achieved an ideal level of crispiness. a place to eat in our fair state. His attempts to thick texture, and a respectable measure of clams.

An accompanying side of fruit featured fresh propatronize a diner in an Eastern Plains hamlet lead to For a first course, Keith had a $3.50 standardduce, as opposed to canned cocktail, including a his arrest and being hustled out of town. If Reacher issue green salad, which, at first glance, was precisely wonderfully sweet and juicy pear slice. were to ever return to Colorado and My entree was a $7.50 green chile wind up in Boulder, I suspect he’d make burger with lightly seasoned fries. a beeline for the Parkway Cafe. This Generously portioned, this burger was humble eatery is nestled among auto a tad messy due to the copious helping shops and other light industrial busiof green chile ladled over it. However, nesses; you’ll likely park next to a this issue was remedied with the help wrecked vehicle awaiting repair. Both of several napkins. While the chile erhaps one of the more compelling aspects of the recent Jack the ambience and menu are basic and itself was mild and the meat wasn’t Reacher film was the casting of legendary film director Werner inviting. Offerings include such breaklocavore grass-fed beef (which isn’t Herzog as the main antagonist. Herzog’s recent output has primarifast and lunch classics as basic egg exactly the point here), I enjoyed this ly consisted of erudite documentaries covering topics as diverse as prehistoric French cave paintings and the death penalty.

But in the plates, burgers, club sandwiches and sandwich as a fine exemplar of ’70s and ’80s, his narrative films were a touch intense in both protuna and cottage cheese salads. There’s American road chow. duction and viewing. Herzog’s film Fitzcarraldo focused on efforts also a smattering of Mexican-inspired I suspect a hungry Jack Reacher to hoist a cargo ship over a mountain. Rather than rely on special dishes like breakfast burritos and enchiwould approve of this unpretentious and effects, Herzog took the more authentic approach of actually ladas. reasonably priced meal as well. hoisting a cargo ship over a mountain.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com Friend Keith and I settled into a

by Clay Fong

Clay’s Obscurity Corner Werner Herzog

P

Boulder Weekly

February 7, 2013 51

Call for Reservations

tidbites

You Love Her, She Loves Sushi

Food happenings around town TIDBITES from Page 49

little-understood smoking ban exception.

Smoking is banned inside all restaurants and bars in Colorado. In Fort Collins, people can smoke on patios, but must stay at least 20 feet from doors or windows.

The city is hosting a survey online, available at fcgov. com/neighborhoodservices/smokingsurvey.php, until Feb. 15.

BRING IN YOUR BELGIAN

West Flanders Brewing Company is hosting a Belgianthemed homebrew competition. The “We Like It Belgian Style” competition challenges homebrewers to bring in an “audacious, unconventional and creative” Belgianstyle beer made with an original recipe.

The winner, chosen by West Flanders’ brewers, will be “the most creative and intriguing beer in the bunch,” with no strict guidelines for judging. The winning brewer will spend the day brewing his or her recipe with West Flanders Brewmaster Brian Lutz, and the beer will be served at the restaurant throughout March.

Participants can download an entry form from wfbrews.com. A beer sample and the entry form must be submitted by Feb. 28.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com

DRAG QUEEN BINGO from Page 49

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1136 Pearl St., Boulder 303.938.0330 www.boulderjapango.com Delivery • Catering • Gift Cards follow us @JapangoSushi 52 February 7, 2013

families a fair forewarning. Bingo didn’t start until after 8 p.m., and Alfalfa’s placed signs and fliers throughout the store well beforehand.

“It’s a sober event. So, obviously I’m not gonna get too, like, raunchy, but at the same time, just like I said at the last event, ‘I just spent the better part of three hours making sure my tits were even and taping my junk to my butt,’” Burton says. “You know, how much of a family show can it really be?”

But families still came, and the drag queen servers had to do a little self-censoring on the fly. Alfalfa’s decided to change the name of a DQB “mocktail,” made with organic chocolate milk and a dash of mint, from the “Naughty Girl Scout” to the “Girl Scout.”

Plus, Burton had planned to open the evening with a list of AIDSprevention talking points, which were sent over from BCAP. But the family with the toddler sitting front and center compelled him to hold off.

“I knelt down to the table and said, ‘Listen, we’re about to start a special event with Boulder County AIDS Project, and there are certain things I’m going to talk about. So, how do you feel about your daughter hearing the s-e-x word?’” Burton says.

The mother’s look alone was enough to make Burton wait until they were gone to start spouting off about safe s-e-x.

Burton played a big role as an advo-

cate for BCAP that night, and he plans to do so well into the future of DQB. “The HIV/AIDS awareness thing … I think as a gay man, no single thing has a stronger effect on our community,” says Burton.

For Burton, both the educational aspect of DQB and the money raised for BCAP are incredibly important. A big part of his life was his time spent singing with the Denver Gay Men’s Chorus, which Burton says lost 91 members to mostly AIDS or AIDSrelated illnesses during the 1980s.

“When you think about what it would have been like to be in the community at that time, watching your friends drop like flies, you know, well, it has forever changed our community. It is an irremovable part of our culture,” says Burton.

Burton says he’s impressed that Alfalfa’s has stepped forward in a city without much space designated for the gay community.

“I think for a small, family-owned business like Alfalfa’s, going up against [bigger competitors] to still vocally and you know, enthusiastically, show their support for the gay community, in a town where it’s a little taboo, is just incredibly powerful,” he says. “And it just makes me extra glad that I’m a part of this community here, even when I’m not in drag.”

Editor’s note: Abby Faires is an employee at Alfalfa’s.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com Boulder Weekly

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Dispatch from the loud table Boulder Beer helps solve our volume problem

by Steve Weishampel

W

eeks before we even conceived of a tour of Boulder County’s breweries, I made an uncomfortable discovery: When the Boulder Weekly staff goes out to eat — which is pretty often as we’re all wealthy and have tons of time — we’re the loud table.

It’s not even close. We talk a lot and we talk really loud. We interrupt each other. We get glances from other tables.

We make jokes to — not even with — the wait staff, for God’s sake.

Elizabeth and Jeff are quiet and I don’t think I’m too bad, but it only takes one, and we have several. David and Dave are pretty loud, but Joel takes the crown. You know that scene in Annie Hall that compares Annie’s silent Wisconsin family with Alvy’s chaotic relatives in New York? Joel is every Singer in that scene.

It’s OK. I just know I have to make a return trip to see the taproom atmosphere untainted by us.

Except this week. We failed to dominate in Boulder Beer Company’s sports-bar-like taproom, where pitchers and burgers abound. Colorado’s oldest craft brewery isn’t noisy, but every table’s full on Thursday afternoon when we sit down and order a taster of each of the 13 beers on tap.

Most Boulder Beer beers need little introduction. Hazed and Infused does its slightly sweet, slightly hoppy thing; Buffalo Gold still sets the standard for golden ales in this town; Mojo IPA packs a bitter and floral punch.

But as with any brewery, the best beers on tap are the limited releases.

Boulder Weekly

The Rum Porter earned literal Oohs and Aahs with its malt balance and complex finish. It reduced the normally loquacious Joel to subject-verb-object.

“That’s really good,” he says. “I’m really happy.”

While a certain anonymous colleague and I committed to Rum Porter pints, BW staff grabbed the two saisons on tap, the Belgian-over-honey Honey of a Saison and the deeper, smoother Wine Barrel-Aged Saison. (Yes, it appears after Hazed and Infused, the Boulder Beer naming crew took a long, long break.) The red-wine-aged brew won head-to-head, even winning a half-positive review from the Belgian Haters Coalition of Elizabeth and Joel.

Over a pair of aggressive darks, the Planet Porter and Obovoid Stout on nitro, Joel tried his best to earn us the loud-table title. But alas, Boulder Beer was just too popular to take over.

This week, we’re adjusting the schedule. Next alphabetically is BRU, but we’ve decided that the new brewer can wait just one more week, because Stout Month summons us.

We’re off to Pearl Street’s Mountain Sun, and — as we plan to do every week going forward — we’re inviting the public to come drink with us. We’ll be at Mountain Sun 5 p.m., Thursday, Feb. 7 chatting with our readers about the stouts, the news and whatever else we feel like. The following week, we’re dodging Valentine’s and heading to Jax Fish House — home of BRU — Wednesday, Feb. 13, also at 5 p.m.

See you there. Bring your megaphone.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com

t B o u ld e r ’s B e s

M O M O ’S !

Arapahoe & Folsom, Boulder 303.440.0882 • www.tibetkitchen.com

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February 7, 2013 53

appetizers

The Rib House

1335 Broadway, Boulder 303-442-RIBS

Synopses of recent restaurant reviews.

To read reviews in their entirety, visit www.boulderweekly.com.

T

he Rib House, formerly located in downtown Boulder, has relocated to University Hill, bringing with it loads of classic American barbecue meats perfumed with wood smoke. The hickoryscented offerings include the achingly tender baby back ribs, hauntingly smoky brisket and sides ranging from traditional cole slaw to mac and cheese wedges.

Top these off with the house barbecue sauces, such as the sweet and subtly peppery XXX hot version, and you’ll have a classic smokehouse experience.

bination plates spotlighting classic tacos, burritos and enchiladas, presented alongside chips and salsa, as well as rice and beans.

Comforting selections include the chock-fullof-pork chile verde and the complex chicken mole.

Ting’s Place

N EAT ALL YOU&CSAID ES RIBS

$

13

95

AYS ON WEDonNly. WhESileDsupplies last.

on er offers.

At Lyons locati ined with any oth Cannot be comb Expires 2/28/13 Dine in only.

24 BEERS ON TAP

1265 South Public Road Lafayette 303-666-9559

1395 Smoked recently reopened Ting’s Place Prime Rib Lafayette’s has all of the staples of Chinesefr $

iday nights

At Lyons locati on on Cannot be comb ly. While supplies last. ined with Dine in only. Ex any other offers. pires 2/28/13

Sachi Sushi

7980 Niwot Road, Niwot 303-652-0238

S

undays are ramen days at Sachi Sushi, nestled in the Niwot Market grocery store. The noodle soup here is a far cry from the dime-a-pack fare favored by starving students, and comes with a choice of salt, soy sauce or spicy miso broth. Toothsome noodles couple with such ingredients as pickled red ginger, sweet corn, fish cake and roast pork. For those desiring something other than noodles, this family-friendly spot also features reasonably simple sushi rolls and nigiri.

Pizzeria Locale 1730 Pearl St. Boulder 303-442-3003

B

303-823-RIBS

Basta

3601 Arapahoe Ave. (inside the Peloton), Boulder 303-997-8775

P

izzeria Basta recently changed its name to Basta — not necessarily a bad thing, as this eatery also dishes out exceptional contemporary fare in addition to its signature pies. Chef Kelly Whitaker makes the most of the restaurant’s impressive wood-fired oven and time-consuming sous vide slow-cooking techniques to turn out distinctive preparations.

These include wood-fired vegetable salads and Niman Ranch chuck flap beef sided with smoked potato.

West Flanders Brewing Company 1125 Pearl St. Boulder 303-447-BREW

P

earl Street’s West Flanders Brewing Company unsurprisingly features several Belgian-inspired brews of its own creation among its beverage offerings. These include the Daisy Cutter, which is a strong ale, the Trippel Lutz and the dark red St. Mark’s Dubbel. Besides beer, they also serve standout bar food like ale cheddar soup, grass-fed beef burgers and more atypical offerings such as pumpkin risotto and pork chops.

Moe’s Broadway Bagel 3075 Arapahoe Ave., Boulder 303-442-4427

T

he three Boulder branches of Moe’s Broadway Bagel have been pleasing local appetites for doughy discs for two decades. Bagel varieties include sweet staples like blueberry and cinnamon raisin as well as savory specialties like onion and tomato cheddar. The more complex bagel sandwiches are more than worthy of consideration and include The New Yorker, a classic lox bagel with such garnishes as red onion and capers, as well as the classic Reuben, piled high with corned beef and sauerkraut.

54 February 7, 2013

American cooking, such as sesame and lemon chicken and Kung Pao dishes of different stripes. But perhaps its strengths are in some of the more traditional and authentic offerings, such as the spiced duck with steamed buns, essentially a scaled-down Peking duck. Another top-shelf selection is the superlative steamed flounder, seasoned with such traditional Chinese aromatics as ginger, scallions and cilantro.

Rincon

oulder’s Pizzeria Locale has solidified its position as a go-to spot for wood-fired, 228 Main St., Lyons Naples-style pie. Starters such as arancini, an addictingly rich fried melding of risotto and (7427) www.smokindavesq.com cheese, and desserts like the sensual butterscotch budino, an upscale pudding, have also burnished this eatery’s reputation. First-timers might want to try the Margherita, perhaps the most emblematArgentino ic of Naples pie, with buffalo milk mozzarella, basil and tomato.

2525 Arapahoe Ave., #A05 Boulder 303-442-4133

T

he recently opened Rincon Argentino brings Argentine fare to Boulder in the form of traditional hot sandwiches and exquisite empanadas. This friendly, order-at-the-counter spot also features such beverages as Malbec wine and yerba mate, the traditional South American tea. Top choices include the archetypical steak sandwiches, available in both a basic and completo version augmented by ham and mozzarella. Can’tmiss empanadas include the spicy steak, and the vegetarian will likely enjoy the Patagonia, an open-faced number featuring garlic, onion and cherry tomato.

Piece, Love & Chocolate 805 Pearl St. Boulder 303-449-4804

T

he go-to spot for all things chocolate in Boulder, Piece, Love & Chocolate, might also be the place you’d most likely spot an Oompa Loompa peering out of the back room. Featuring an impressive selection of artisan chocolate bars, drinking chocolates and housemade truffles, cookies and cakes, there’s plenty here for the most ardent cocoa connoisseur. Top choices include the basil and ginger truffles, and the salted caramel chocolate truffle torte.

3 Margaritas

3390 28th St., Boulder 303-998-1234

B

oulder’s 3 Margaritas is a local outpost of a Coloradocentric Mexican restaurant chain. A self-described family restaurant, this ethnic eatery features reasonably priced com-

Dizzy’s Donuts 1606 Conestoga St. Boulder 303-494-5331

D

onuts seem to have supplanted cupcakes as the retro sweet of the moment, and Boulder’s Dizzy’s Donuts is riding this wave by offering fresh takes on this pastry. Dizzy’s brews Ozo coffee alongside unique creations like maple bacon donuts. Other new-school selections include S’More and pumpkin cheesecake varieties, although classics like the first-rate apple fritter are more than satisfying.

Kasa Japanese Grill 1468 Pearl St., Boulder 303-938-8888

K

asa Japanese Grill is unmatched in its design aesthetic and hospitable service. This Asian eatery offers all the standbys of Japanese cuisine, including fried tempura options, donburi rice bowls, yakitori skewers, noodles and, of course, sushi. Attention to detail is evident in offerings such as the perfectly steeped Sencha green tea and the agedashi tofu appetizer, and the bento lunches provide fine value.

Colterra

210 Franklin St., Niwot 303-652-0777

L

ow-key and locavore, Niwot’s Colterra spotlights fresh takes on traditional fare in a homey yet elegant setting. Weekend brunch options feature oatmeal, griddle cakes and egg dishes such as a reimagining of the classic Benedict with proscuitto and polenta cakes.

Other top morning choices include a Long Farm sausage frittata and Grand Marnier beignets.

Respond: letters@boulderweekly.com Boulder Weekly

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February 7, 2013 55

astrology ARIES

MARCH 21-APRIL 19:

Go to RealAstrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s EXPANDED WEEKLY AUDIO HOROSCOPES and DAILY TEXT MESSAGE HOROSCOPES. The audio horoscopes are also available by phone at 1-877873-4888 or 1-900-950-7700.

“What we need is more people who specialize in the impossible,” said poet Theodore Roethke. For the foreseeable future, Aries, you could and should be a person like that. I’m not saying that you will forevermore be a connoisseur of amazements and a massager of miracles and a magnet for unexpected beauty. But if you want to, you can play those roles for the next few weeks. How many exotic explorations and unlikely discoveries can you cram into your life between now and March 1? How many unimaginable transformations can you imagine?

TAURUS

APRIL 20-MAY 20:

North America’s most powerful and iconic waterfall is Niagara Falls, which straddles the border between the U.S. and Canada. In 1969, the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers managed to shut down the American side of this elemental surge for a few months. They performed their monumental magic by building a dam made with 27,800 tons of rocks.

Their purpose was to do research and maintenance on the stony foundation that lies beneath the water. I’m thinking that you Tauruses could accomplish a metaphorical version of that feat in the coming weeks: some awesome task that allows you to peer beneath the surface and make refinements that enhance your stability for a long time.

GEMINI

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National Geographic reports that dung beetles have an intimate relationship not only with the earth but also with the stars. Scientists in South Africa found that the bugs use the Milky Way galaxy to orient themselves while rolling their precious balls of dung to the right spot for safekeeping. The bright band of starlight in the sky serves as a navigational aid. I nominate the dung beetle to be your power animal in the coming weeks, Gemini. It will be prime time for you, too, to align your movements and decisions with a bigger picture and a higher power. (Read about the research here: tinyurl.com/GalacticBeetles.)

CANCER

JUNE 21-JULY 22:

You should go right ahead and compare oranges and apples in the coming week, Cancerian. Honey and butter, too: It’s fine to compare and contrast them. Science and religion.

Bulldogs and Siamese cats. Dew and thunderclaps. Your assignment is to create connections that no one else would be able to make … to seek out seemingly improbable harmonies between unlikely partners … to dream up interesting juxtapositions that generate fertile ideas. Your soul needs the delight and challenge of unexpected blending.

LEO

JULY 23-AUG. 22:

The collection called Grimm’s Fairy Tales includes the story “The Devil and His Grandmother.” In one scene, the devil’s grandmother is petting and rubbing her grandson’s head.

Or at least that’s what the English translations say. But the authors wrote in German, and in their original version of the text, grandma is in fact plucking lice from the devil’s hair. Your job in the coming week, Leo, is to ensure that no one sanitizes earthy details like that. Be vigilant for subtle censorship. Keep watch for bits of truth that have been suppressed. You need the raw feed that comes straight from the source.

VIRGO

AUG. 23-SEPT. 22:

In her book Jung and Tarot, Sallie Nichols notes that the sixteenth card in most Tarot decks portrays lightning as a hostile force: “jagged, zigzag strokes that slash across the sky like angry teeth.” But there’s one deck, the Marseilles Tarot, that suggests a kinder, gentler lightning. The yellow and red phenomenon descending from the heavens resembles a giant feather duster; it looks like it would tickle and clean rather than burn. I suspect you’ll be visited by a metaphorical version of this second kind of lightning sometime soon, Virgo. Prepare to be tickled and cleaned!

LIBRA

SEPT. 23-OCT. 22:

Years ago, “bastard” was a derisive term for a child born

to unmarried parents. It reflected the conventional moral code, which regarded a “birth out of wedlock” as scandalous. But I think we can safely say that this old dogma has been officially retired. According to recent statistics compiled by the CDC (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention), over 40 percent of the kids born in the U.S. are to unmarried mothers. Just goes to show you that not all forbidden acts remain forbidden forever. What was unthinkable or out of bounds or not allowed at one time may evolve into what’s normal. I bring this up, Libra, because it’s an excellent time for you to divest yourself of a certain taboo that’s no longer necessary or meaningful.

SCORPIO

OCT. 23-NOV. 21:

While trekking up Mount Katahdin in Maine, naturalist Henry David Thoreau had a “mountain-top experience” that moved him to observe, “I stand in awe of my body.”

You’re due for a similar splash of illumination, Scorpio. The time is right for you to arrive at a reverent new appreciation for the prodigious feats that your physical organism endlessly performs for you. What could you do to encourage such a breakthrough? How can you elevate your love for the flesh and blood that houses your divine spark?

SAGITTARIUS NOV. 22-DEC. 21:

How do you like your caviar? Do you prefer it to be velvety and smooth, or would you rather have it be full of strong, fishy taste? If it’s the first option, beluga caviar is your best option. If the second, sevruga should be your favorite.

What? You say you never eat caviar? Well, even if you don’t, you should regard the choice between types of caviar as an apt metaphor for the coming week. You can either have velvety smoothness or a strong taste, but not both. Which will it be? Set your intention.

CAPRICORN

DEC. 22-JAN. 19:

“Dear Astrology Guy: I have been reading your horoscopes since I was 19. For a while, I liked them. They were fun riddles that made me think. But now I’ve soured on them. I’m sick and tired of you asking me to transform myself. You just keep pushing and pushing, never satisfied, always saying it’s time to improve myself or get smarter or fix one of my bad habits. It’s too much! I can’t take it any more! Sometimes I just want to be idle and lazy. Your horoscopes piss me off! - Crabby Capricorn.” Dear Crabby: I’ve got some good news. In the coming week, you are completely excused from having to change anything about yourself or your life. Stay exactly the same! Be frozen in time. Resist the urge to tinker.

Take a vacation from life’s relentless command to evolve.

AQUARIUS

JAN. 20-FEB. 18:

Young art student Andrzej Sobiepan sneaked into Poland’s National Museum with a painting he had done himself and managed to surreptitiously mount it on one of the walls. It hung there for a while before authorities noticed it and took it down. “I decided that I will not wait 30 or 40 years for my works to appear at a place like this,” he said. “I want to benefit from them in the here and now.” This is the kind of aggressive self-expression I’d like to see you summon in the coming weeks, Aquarius. Don’t wait for the world to come and invite you to do what you want to do. Invite yourself.

P.S. The English translation of Sobiepan’s Polish last name means “his own master.” What can you do to be more of your own master?

PISCES

FEB. 19-MARCH 20:

Before any system can leap to a higher level of organization, says poet Susan Goldsmith Wooldridge, it has to undergo dissolution. “Unraveling or disintegrating is a vital, creative event making room for the new,” she declares. Guess what time it is for the system we all know and love as you, Pisces?

That’s right: It’s a perfect moment to undo, dismantle, and disperse … as well as to unscramble, disentangle, and disencumber. Be of good cheer! Have faith that you will be generating the conditions necessary for the rebirth that will follow. “To change from one reality to another,” writes Wooldridge, “a thing first must turn into nothing.” (Her book is Poemcrazy.)

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Boulder Weekly

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February 7, 2013 63

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