It’s Too Peoply Outside 03

Why did I say that?... everyone is staring at me… omg my voice is shaking… I knew the answer to that question, why didn’t I say anything?

These indexed words are a brief look into the mind of someone with social anxiety (aka my mind). Strangely though, whilst social anxiety has a high prevalence in university students (47% mild social anxiety and 25% diagnosed) there is a weird barrier around people actually recognising someone around you has social anxiety and not introversion (where a person is reclusive because they’ve chosen to be). Social anxiety is where a person (me) finds it difficult to act like myself in a normal setting, as the entire time I’m wandering do they even like who I actually am?

Social anxiety in university students

(47% mild social anxiety & 25% diagnosed)

Thus, when it comes to social settings at university and basically the most popular (and the only way really) option to make friends is to attend parties. Which means loud music, drinking and crowds. For some, what I just described is the highlight of their time at university, meanwhile for me environments such as this makes my bones tremor (and not in excitement).

To give you a better idea of how bad crowds affect me, here’s a peep into my life: walking into a crowded Woolworths causes my heart to accelerate and sends me skittering out the door seconds after entering. Moreso when I am in the library and have to hear the chaotic noise of everyone talking and keyboards typing, I near run out of the building screaming to escape my thoughts. What are these thoughts? They tend to range from is everyone staring at me? To am I hunching over? Why didn’t I dress nicer? Is my hair frizzy? Is someone staring at my laptop screen? And the list goes on.

Now, you could be wondering, why not just do university online? Well, the easiest answer is to tell you ‘it doesn’t do me any good to avoid my fears’. As a form of exposure therapy, I have made myself remain amongst a crowd of gossiping people in my lecture room rather then shifted seats to escape their noisy bubble. I’ve made myself stand before an entire class and present a 25-minute presentation rather than emailing my lecturer to request a private audience. The easiest thing to do if you have social anxiety is to avoid what causes your grievances, yet it doesn’t help you as a person nor your mental wellbeing.

Which is why I draw attention to the weird barrier about social anxiety being recognised and not classified as ‘introversion’. Social anxiety isn’t introversion, it’s a mental health disorder that will follow me into the future. However, by forcing myself to do these social interactions that is so easy for others I am promoting my own mental wellbeing as best as I can and learning in a way that will benefit others when I go into being a Clinical Psychologist specialising in Anxiety Disorders.

Which is why I draw attention to the weird barrier about social anxiety being recognised and not classified as ‘introversion’. Social anxiety isn’t introversion, it’s a mental health disorder that will follow me into the future. However, by forcing myself to do these social interactions that is so easy for others I am promoting my own mental wellbeing as best as I can and learning in a way that will benefit others when I go into being a Clinical Psychologist specialising in Anxiety Disorders.

Words by Charlize Mackie

Feeling a bit gloomy lately?

Let’s pour ourselves a cuppa and have a heart-to-heart yarn 05

We are nearly halfway through 2023, and you may be wondering what the rest of the year has in store. Whether you’re a new student at Bond or have returned after a break, starting a new semester can be overwhelming, and even just thinking about what to do next can be challenging.

It’s been a year since I first came to Bond, and I still remember waking up one morning feeling so anxious about the day ahead. Being an international student, I was scared of being alone and isolated since I didn’t know anyone from Bond or the city I had just moved in. The first few days were exciting as I got to meet my lecturers and some classmates, but that feeling didn’t last very long. Part of it was due to the numerous assignments I had to do, and the other part was figuring out how to spend my free time. For an entire week, I didn’t talk to anyone except my family back home. I reassured them that I was well, but I knew deep down that I wasn’t. The only places I visited were the building where I had classes and a nearby shopping centre to buy groceries. During classes, I interacted with some classmates, but our conversations hardly went beyond our subject matter. Remaining an introvert, I made excuses for not sharing much about myself, but later, I realised that I needed to make a move.

I started writing down in my journal how I felt each day, what food I ate, whom I talked to, and what activities I engaged in. It turned out that on days when I binged on Netflix and snacks, or scrolled through social media, I felt down and sometimes cried for no reason. I was aware that I was stressed and was relying on these things to cope.

Surprisingly or not, on days when I socialized with new friends during breaks, took a walk around the campus, or simply cooked for myself, I felt more upbeat and less procrastinated when it came to studying.

This makes more sense when you consider that when it comes to stress or anxiety, people tend to cope adaptively or maladaptively. Individuals’ coping mechanism depends on their interactions with the external and internal world. For example, if you believe that you can manage stress by making a priority list or getting help from other people, you’re more likely to view yourself as capable of overcoming it. However, if you experience a lack of confidence or any negative thoughts that affect your self-esteem, you’re more likely to avoid the problem by engaging in maladaptive behaviors such as binge-eating or doing something in excess. In her new book about mental health and self-help tips, Dr. Julie Smith writes, “When we feel anxious about something, the most natural human response is to avoid it. We know that if we stay away, we’ll feel safe, for now. But avoidance not only maintains anxiety, it makes anxiety worse over time.” This captures how maladaptive coping might bring more consequences than you can imagine. But how do we switch to adaptive coping and stay motivated?

I learned that finding motivation comes from your passion, dreams, and goals. The key is not to transform into someone you are unfamiliar with, but rather to choose better alternatives that benefit you in the long run. I’m sure we all love getting things done, practicing self-care, and bonding with others.

For me, I wanted to make the most out of my time here at Bond. I have been practicing to express more gratitude for what I have and appreciate the opportunity I have been given to obtain knowledge, learning about a new culture and place, and meeting new people. I have joined some friends going to the gym and swimming pool at Bond Sports Center, and these physical activities have proved to help a lot. I have browsed so many interesting books in the library and signed up for Bond student clubs that align with my interests. I have also been to the Bond Career Center to learn about volunteering opportunities that relate to my field of study. I have ended up being a research assistant at a local hospital and enjoyed my time there, though it is supposed to be only for a few months. After having become more engaged in the community, I noticed that I have grown to be more optimistic and gained a greater sense of purpose for my learning journey. Although there have been tough times when old habits kick in, I have been able to reach out to my support network and practice self-care activities, such as meditation or journaling. They not only calm me down, but also help me clarify my thoughts and gain new insights about my emotions.

If this sounds like what you are going through, and whether or not you are prepared to make adjustments to improve your mental health, remember to listen to your inner voice. It will lead you to where you want to go.

Words by Van