The Pulse 14.18 » May 4, 2017

SPECIALTY TEES · MYTHICAL MOTORS · HANDMAIDENS TALE

MAY 4, 2017

The Return Of The Renaissance Of The Hairy Man BEARDS, GOATEES, MUTTONCHOPS, MUSTACHES AND SIDEBURNS…OH MY Follicular Research by Kevin Hale

CHATTANOOGA'S WEEKLY ALTERNATIVE

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VOLUME 14, ISSUE 18 MAY 4, 2017

CONTENTS 4

THE CARNIVAL IS IN TOWN: 100 DAYS OF CHAOS

Our first reality television president has blurred the lines between government, reality, and entertainment. Watching the Donald Show is as mesmerizing as a car accident.

12

A TROUBLING GLIMPSE AT A DYSTOPIC FUTURE

For whatever reason, sales of “1984”—the classic dystopian novel by George Orwell—skyrocketed after the election of our current president. For reasons that are somewhat obvious.

14

INSIDE THE ART OF THE SPECIALTY T-SHIRT

There are many good printing companies around town, but none are quite like pre•poster•ous.

The tiny North Chattanooga startup has been in the printing business for several years now.

20

MYTHICAL MOTORS ARE RUNNING THE SHINE

Mythical Motors, Chattanooga’s favorite powerpop quartet, has just put the finishing touches on their latest album, set for release later this month, called Running the Shine.

ALSO INSIDE

8

The Return Of The Hairy Man Current beard fashion encompasses a variety of lifestyles and for the better part of a decade the growth of facial hair has become integral to these groups to express everything from ornamental to evolutionary needs. However, mustachioed men and even those with goatees alike argue about the trend, instead calling it a beard renaissance.

FEATURED CONTRIBUTORS

5

CONSIDER THIS

24

MUSIC REVIEWS

7

SHRINK RAP

26

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

16

ARTS CALENDAR

28

OPINIONS & DIVERSIONS

19

ART OF BUSINESS

29

JONESIN' CROSSWORD

22

MUSIC CALENDAR

30

SUSHI & BISCUITS

Kevin Hale is a freelance journalist and experienced internet and television marketer living in North Chattanooga. He also enjoys chasing flying saucers and saving bees with his 5-year old son.

Columnist Dr. Richard L. Pimental-Habib, Ph.D., C.C.H., better known as “Dr. Rick”, is an author, psychotherapist, educator and minister, and holds a doctorate in clinical hypnotherapy with an emphasis in mind/body wellness.

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BEGINNINGS ∙ POLITICS

The Carnival Is In Town: One Hundred Days Of Chaos

By Terry Stulce

Pulse contributor

BREWER MEDIA GROUP Publisher & President Jim Brewer II FOUNDED 2003 BY ZACHARY COOPER & MICHAEL KULL

EDITORIAL

Managing Editor Gary Poole gary@chattanoogapulse.com Assistant Editor Brooke Brown Music Editor Marc T. Michael Film Editor John DeVore Contributors Thom Benson • Rob Brezsny Kevin Hale • Matt Jones Mike McJunkin • Tony Mraz Ernie Paik • Rick Pimental-Habib Terry Stulce • Michael Thomas Cartoonists Max Cannon • Rob Rogers Jen Sorenson • Tom Tomorrow

ADVERTISING

Director of Sales Mike Baskin mikebaskin@brewermediagroup.com Account Executives Chee Chee Brown • Brittany Dreon Rick Leavell • Libby Phillips Danielle Swindell • Logan Vandergriff

CONTACT

Offices 1305 Carter St., Chattanooga, TN 37402 Phone 423.265.9494 Fax 423.266.2335 Email info@chattanoogapulse.com Website chattanoogapulse.com Facebook @chattanoogapulse THE FINE PRINT: The Pulse is published weekly by Brewer Media and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on music, the arts, entertainment, culture and local news. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publisher may take more than one copy per weekly issue.

The Pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors.

Contents Copyright © 2017 by Brewer Media. All rights reserved.

R

EALITY TELEVISION BLURRED THE lines between reality and entertainment. Our first reality television president has blurred the lines between government, reality, and entertainment. Watching the Donald Show is as mesmerizing as a car accident.

You can’t look away even though what you are seeing is an abomination.

His Cabinet has more freaks than a carnival midway. Trump is the carnie barker screaming, “Come one, come all.”

“See the Secretary of Education who is uneducated but has a billion dollars for every IQ point she possesses,” he shouts to the rapturous crowd. “See Bannon, half man-half beast, who wants to destroy our country and rebuild it as the Third Reich.”

“Come see Jared, the super son-in-law, who will change the world with a mere wave of his hand. Reforming the entire U.S. government, ironing out the problems with England, Germany, Mexico, Australia, and Canada that his father-in-law created, and bringing peace to the Middle East will be achieved through his supernatural powers,” he continues to bellow to all who listen.

“See Tom Terrific of H.H.S. make underthe- table deals to enrich himself while destroying American health care. See Scott Pruitt turn the Earth into an uninhabitable planet cooked by CO2 in our atmosphere and poisoned by industrial toxins in our water and soil,” he screams to the heavens.

“This is truly the greatest show on Earth.”

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After the freak show, the midway barker revealed the following to the press: “Mexico has begun building the wall and has agreed to assume full financial responsibility for the construction. We have stopped all Islamic immigration and have repealed and replaced Obamacare

with a plan that allows Americans to choose any plan they want. Of course, these plans are affordable except for those people who are sick, drug addicted, mentally ill, poor, or geezers.”

“This whole business with Russia is just fake news and ‘sour grapes’.

Vladimir likes me better than Hillary and chose me to be President.

So get over it. As I’ve said before

neither I nor my lackeys colluded with the Russians. I have never met a Russian in my life. As for Attorney General Beauregard, he simply forgot those two meetings with that Russian spymaster when he was testifying under oath.”

“General Flynn did fail to register as an agent of a foreign government, but they paid him less than a million dollars so it just slipped his mind. And that telephone call to Kyslak was just to reassure him about the sanctions that acting President Obama leveled against the Russians for interfering in my election. So no harm done.”

“Yes, Eric Prince, Carter Page, Paul Manafort, Roger Stone, and my son-in-law, Jared are my good buddies and loyal stooges, but their contacts and meetings with the Russian agents were purely coincidental.”

“Oh, one last thing, don’t worry about North Korea or Syria.

I’m going to nuke them back to the Stone Age.” Note: For those American Rubes (35 percent) that conflate lampoon with reality even when it is labeled with a magic marker: this is fake news.

Terry Stulce served two combat tours in Vietnam, one with the 101st Airborne and one with the 69th Border Rangers. He was an LCSW and owner of Cleveland Family Counseling before retirement in 2009.

Consider This with Dr. Rick

EdiToon

by Rob Rogers

“Anything that costs you your peace is too expensive.”

— unknown

Latin Festival Comes To Highland Park Commons Experience Cinco de Mayo in the best way possible at the Latin Festival Saturday from 11-3 at Highland Park Commons in downtown Chattanooga. Like a carnival for all ages, the Latin Festival will feature musical performances by local and regional artists, a parade of nations, folkloric dance, an authentic food court, Latino-America soccer tournament and so much more!

Designed as a free community celebration, this event does more than just provide a fun, educational experience for the people of Chattanooga. All proceeds go to help fund Chattanooga

State Foundation’s Latino Scholarship Fund and the Chattanooga State’s Adult Basic Education and English as a Second Language programs that have been offered in Highland Park since

2001. Beyond having a great time experiencing the culture of Latin America, this event will provide funding to great programs that are bettering our community.

This year, Atlantic Capital Bank announced a donation to the festival of $10,000.

So spend your Cinco de Mayo weekend experiencing it in the proper way at the Latin Festival. Dine on authentic food, experience the sounds of musical performances, and know all the while you’re supporting a great cause.

— Brooke Brown

Okay, so you’ve been reading “Shrink Rap” for over 10 years. You’ve been following “Consider This” for over three. What have you discovered that helps your peace of mind? What are you doing to find your center, to go to that quiet, inner place of gratitude? And have you gotten loved ones to honor your need for occasional solitude?

Meditation? Tea on the back porch?

Long hikes in nature? Warm baths?

Blissful visualizations (aka your “happy place”?)

Well, whether your bliss time is now a regular, healthy habit in your life and you’re realizing all the beautiful, life-enhancing benefits; or you try to remember but only prioritize your inner peace sometimes; or you forgot.

Here’s something to consider, to help you commit to your healthful journey, from Joseph Campbell: “Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls.”

— Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D.

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COLUMN ∙ SHRINK RAP

When the Going Gets Really Tough The good doctor has practical advice on how to deal with extreme stress

Dr. Rick

Pulse columnist

E

XTREME STRESS IS A PART OF LIFE, as we all can relate to having moments where everything just feels like too much. Or we feel alone with our burdens.

We may suffer a health crisis, financial crisis, or a crisis of faith. Maybe it’s a relationship that’s in peril, hanging on by a thread. We may be experiencing feelings of hopelessness, helplessness, or feel so overwhelmed that it’s hard to think of anything but our problems.

Perhaps we’ve recently suffered a significant loss, and daily living feels shadowed by a persistent, dark cloud. Eventually our bodies show signs of the wear and tear.

These are times when we’re most prone to becoming ill and having accidents.

So how do we cope when life gets really hard? How do we not merely survive the experience, but develop the necessary skills to continue to fight the good fight…intact, with sound mind and body, still stopping to smells the roses each day, and feeling grateful to be alive?

When we face the really big challenges in life, it is time to reach deep into our “Big Bag O’ Tools” for help: 1) Let’s start with perspective. There’s the person whose house burns down and says, we’ve lost everything. And the person who says, let’s save the nails…we can rebuild.

If you’re glass tends to be half-full under usual conditions, that attitude will serve you well during hard times.

2) Inner fortitude. If you’ve seen your parents—or others from childhood—struggle and make it through, perhaps stronger and wiser for the experience, then you might have learned some very valuable lessons about being stronger than you think you are, and such lessons will come to your aid later in life.

3) Faith in the Universe (or in God, or one’s Creator, Source, the Divine, or however you understand your Higher Power.) There is going through the experience in fear, and going through the experience resting in faith.

4) It’s so important to have a quality support system—people who care for you deeply, accept you unconditionally, and provide everything from a shoulder to cry on to practical assistance when needed. Part two is reaching out to them. Knowing it’s okay—and important—to ask for help.

When I think of major challenges in life, I think of my dear friend and colleague, Craig, who passed away several years ago.

Regular Shrink Rappers will remember Craig, who helped us all with his attitude, inner strength and insights. Craig was an occupational therapist, who worked mostly with veterans struggling with deep psychological and physical issues.

Being a heart transplant patient, as well as an amputee who needed a wheelchair and a truckload of medication daily, he knew a few things about surviving hard times.

Photo by Marek Bernat

So when I asked Craig about what he felt is our most important survival tool, his answer was: Hope.

“With hope,” he’d say, “your life becomes more about what you want. What do I want? A cure?

Maybe, but what if there is no cure.?I may still want to live life to the fullest. Today is all I’ve got.

Hope is empowering. Everything changes with hope. This is true of us as individuals, but also of society. Society at large always needs to feel hopeful.

“Our lives can be pretty harsh.

Hope may be just getting a good night’s sleep for a change, or being able to say ‘I love you’ to the people in my life. I don’t believe happiness is a ‘state of being’ as others say. I think happiness is a decision. With hope I can make that choice. Without it, forget it.”

Until next time, I want to share some insights from Thich Nhat Hanh. Thich Nhat Hanh is one of the most respected and recognized Zen masters in the world, as well as being the author of over 60 books, a renowned poet, peace activist, and human rights advocate.

“The essence of love and compassion is understanding, the ability to recognize the physical and psychological suffering of others, to put ourselves ‘inside the skin’ of the other, and witness for ourselves their suffering. Understanding someone’s suffering is the best gift you can give another person. Understanding is love’s other name.”

Dr. Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D., is a psychotherapist, author, minister, and educator in private practice in Chattanooga.

Contact him at DrRPH.com, visit his wellness center at WellNestChattanooga.com

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COVER STORY

The Return Of The Renaissance Of The Hairy Man Beards, goatees, muttonchops, mustaches and sideburns…oh my

By Kevin Hale Pulse contributor

C

URRENT BEARD FASHION ENCOMpasses a variety of lifestyles and for the better part of a decade the growth of facial hair has become integral to these groups to express everything from ornamental to evolutionary needs.

However, mustachioed men and even those with goatees alike argue about the trend, instead calling it a beard renaissance.

History has seen its share of bearded men. Early humans used beards for warmth and intimidation. I can attest to this with my facial hair. I have been told by my girlfriend that I look mean and my own mother told me I look like a bouncer at a club. A beard on a man’s face creates the look of a stronger looking jaw line and this exaggeration helps them appear more intimidating.

Pulse music editor Marc T. Michael agrees his look gives him a long jaw line. “It’s not exactly a goatee,” Michael says explaining his appearance. “I’m not cool enough to get caught up in any current trend; I’m just too lazy to shave.”

But before fashion or dance clubs or any kind of modern housing existed, facial hair kept prehistoric men warm and it also protected their mouths from sand, dirt, the sun and many other different elements.

In 3000 BCE to 1580 BCE, Egyptian royalty used a false beard that was made of metal. This false beard was held onto the face by a ribbon that was tied over their heads.

This practice was done by both kings and queens. Ancient Egyptians were also known to die their chin beards with reddish brown to strong brown dyes.

Salon owner Mitchell Robert understands the importance of keeping up your beard and how to create an illusion simply by using tricks of the trade. “I’ve got a white stripe at 8 • THE PULSE • MAY 4, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

Travis Hale and his beard (and his wife)

the bottom of my beard but I didn’t dye the stripe, I dyed my whole beard dark and left the stripe.

Otherwise I would be all gray.”

Mesopotamian civilizations took great care of their beards. They would use products like beard oil to keep their beards looking healthy. “It is something you have to do,” adds Robert. “Twice a week I apply balm and oil to emulsify my beard then shape it up, especially if I’m going out.”

The Assyrians dyed their beards black, and the Persians died theirs an orange-red color.

They would also fashion their beards using ancient curling irons and make ringlets, frizzles, and

tiered effects. During ancient times, in Turkey and India, when someone had a long beard it was considered a symbol of wisdom and dignity.

Ancient Greeks considered beards honorable and commonly curled theirs with tongs in order to create hanging curls. Their beards were cut only as a punishment. Around 345 B.C., Alexander the Great decreed that soldiers couldn’t have beards.

He was afraid that opposing soldiers would grab on to the Grecians’ beards and use it against them while in battle.

Ancient Romans preferred their beads to be trimmed and well groomed. A Roman by the

COVER STORY

Walt Whitman

name of Lucius Tarquinius Pricus encouraged the use of razors in order to guide the city to hygienic reform in 616-578 B.C. Although Pricus tried to encourage shaving, it still was not generally accepted until 454 B.C. In 454 B.C., a group of Greek Sicilian barbers traveled from Sicily into mainland Italy. They set up barber shops that were situated on the main streets of Rome. Eventually shaving started to become the trend in ancient Rome, though philosophers like Socrates and Plato kept their beards as a sign of rebellion.

Little did they know how their grooming habits would influence all kinds of artists and musicians to this day.

In the early 1600’s, a painter named Sir Anthony Vandyke began to paint many aristocrats with pointed beards.

This style of beard was eventually called the Van Dyke. The men used pomade or wax to shape their beards, and they applied with tiny brushes and combs. The people of this time invented different gadgets in order to keep mustaches and beards in shape while they slept.

By the 1800’s poets like Walt Whitman embraced the beard as manly, and his 1855 hymn “Song of Myself” touted

Meadows recalls a time when beards were frowned upon and those who wore them were seen as troublemakers. “About ten years ago, I noticed a change in mainstream culture where beards became more accepted.” his physical vitality through facial hair declaring: Washes and razors for foofoos … for me freckles and a bristling beard Copies of the poem were sold with a full-length drawing of the poet, to show him true to his word. As Whitman suggested, beards were liberating and empowering, and were accordingly embraced by men of every rank.

My nephew Travis Hale recently got married in Palm Desert, CA and one of the most striking things about his wedding photos was his beard. “I have been growing my beard for al-

most two years,” he says. “People either love it or hate it. Most men compliment me on it, especially about how full it is. My mother hates it. My wife loves it.”

But like Michael, Hale doesn’t follow any beard trend, but is committed to taking care of it nonetheless. “It’s not as easy as you would think,” says Hale. “You gain respect for someone when you see that they have a glorious beard.”

Bear Meadows has taken the current beard trend so far as to custom formulate a line of products by men with beards called, you guessed it, The Beard Line.

“We hired a chemist and master barber to develop the line and we have been taking it to vendor shows for the last three years,” says Meadows. “Our beard oils help make the whiskers soft and manageable, while the beard balms help you to shape and keep even the most course beard looking controlled and managed.”

While Meadows realizes we are living in a beard renaissance, facial hair has always been a part of his lifestyle. “I had hair on my body when I was seven or eight years old,” he remembers. “I used to have to shave my chest hair.”

Meadows recalls a time when beards were frowned upon and those who wore them were seen as troublemakers.

“About ten years ago, I noticed a change in mainstream culture where beards became more accepted.”

He has always been a part of the Bear community, a subset of gay male culture which defines a “Bear” as a larger, hairier man who projects an image of rugged masculinity.

“We actually have a beard seminar twice a year at Burlap and Board where about 36 guys, both gay and straight, continued on page 11

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COVER STORY show up with girlfriends, boyfriends and spouses to check out the latest styles,” says Meadows. “Last time we had twelve beard models showcasing everything from short stubble to ducktail beards, Van Dyke beards to mutton chops. No matter our differences, we can still bond over the beard.”

There have been many beard styles throughout the ages. A style made popular by Abraham Lincoln, is called the chin curtain. This is when there is facial hair along the jawline which is long enough to hang from the chin. American essayist, Henry David Thoreau, had a style called the chinstrap beard. This style is achieved when sideburns are connected to each other by a narrow hair line along the jaw.

English heavy metal musician, Lemmy Kilmister wore his facial hair in a style called friendly muttonchops. Friendly muttonchops are formed when muttonchops are connected by a mustache and there is no chin hair. American professional wrestler Hulk Hogan was famous for the style horseshoe (or handlebar) mustache. This is a full mustache with ends that extend down in parallel strait lines all the way down to the chin.

In current times, beards continue to show masculinity, royalty, fashion, and

Various classic barber tools for beards

status. Specifically, the beard has long assumed an important place in music history. In folk and blues, a beard is required to demonstrate you have the necessary gravitas for the subject matter; in heavy metal and hard rock the beard is a sign of strength.

“There’s no question beards have a place in modern music but it is a fine line,” says Michael. “I think it more or less just fits the lifestyle of a musician but doesn’t necessarily de-

fine who they are.”

Although Michael recalls a time when he was 14 and had a final acting call in his hometown of Radcliffe, Kentucky. “The casting director told me to lose the mustache or lose the part,” he remembers. “I refused to part with my hair follicles.” The local paper did, however, print a front page story about the fracas.

No matter who I spoke to, they say they won’t be shaving their beards anytime soon.

“Wear the beard, be the beard is my motto,” says Meadows. Michael has only shaved his facial hair twice in 25 years.

Hale says when it has reached its longest point or once it stops growing, he will think about shaving it. Robert says his wife actually suggested he grow his beard.

“Happy wife, happy life,” he exclaims.

“You know mullets use to be in style, then it was high hair for women,” he says. “We will have to see if this is passing trend or if it’s here to stay.”

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FILM & TELEVISION

A Troubling Glimpse At A Dystopic Future The Handmaid's Tale holds up a mirror to modern society and a discomfortably possible future America

Experience The Fury & Force Of A Hurricane Hold on to your hats because a storm’s a-brewin’ at the Tennessee Aquarium IMAX 3D Theater. From May 5 to May 7, special screenings of Hurricane 3D, a new IMAX adventure, will fill the theater’s massive six-story screen.

Hurricanes are the most powerful storm systems the atmosphere can brew. On Chattanooga’s largest screen, audiences will learn more about the forces that contribute to the birth and the awe-inspiring power of these systems.

The film’s main “character” is Hurricane Lucy, a fictional storm whose growth is based on the development of several actual hurricanes the filmmakers documented over a five-year period.

Audiences will follow Lucy’s transformation along a 15,000-kilometer journey beginning with a gentle breeze over the African Sahel that grows into a lifegiving monsoon before swelling to monumental proportions over the Atlantic Ocean.

Ships are tossed on growing ocean swells, and the violent winds and torrential rains of Hurricane Lucy crash into the rainforests of the Carribean before causing immense storm surges in the Gulf of Mexico. Along the way, the film peeks into the lives of a host of supporting characters, the men, women, plants and animals in Lucy’s path who are affected by it, for better or worse.

— Thom Benson Hurricane 3D Friday & Saturday 4 & 7 p.m., Sunday 4 p.m.

Tennessee Aquarium IMAX 3D Theater 201 Chestnut Street (423) 266-4629 www.tnaqua.org/imax 12 • THE PULSE • MAY 4, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

By John DeVore Pulse Film Editor

F

OR WHATEVER REASON, SALES OF “1984”—the classic dystopian novel by George Orwell—skyrocketed after the election of our current president. It might be due to the new administration’s penchant for creating alternate realities during press conferences and television interviews, coining phrases like “alternative facts” and “Holocaust centers” and generally bewildering the news media, who are woefully unprepared for such open and willful deceit.

It might be simply because the populace recognizes that something very abnormal is happening at the highest level of government, and “1984” is easily the most recognizable dystopian novel in

history. Maybe, by digesting the themes put forth

by Orwell, they can get their bearings on what to expect.

Most would argue that the society in “1984” isn’t necessarily representative of what’s happening now. Our American dystopia will likely be one of our own distinct flavors, something unpredictable and unknowable. It could feature a few highlights from our most depressing authors, though.

If we are looking a distinctly American, feminist dystopia, we should look no further than Margaret Atwood’s “A Handmaid’s Tale.” Published in 1985, the book is as timely as ever (unfortunately), and has now been brought to life in a powerful and uncomfortable series on Hulu.

The story is set in the near future of New England, where the United States has been over-

FILM & TELEVISION

“What’s striking about the show is how it hints at the speed of society’s unraveling. It was a sudden shift in a long process. A person might never even notice until it was too late.” thrown and co-opted by a theocracy based on traditional Old Testament principles.

Fertility and birth rates have been in decline for generations, due to pollution, and the Christian fundamentalists in charge have taken a note from Genesis 30: 1-3, with the tale of Jacob and Rachel.

Rachel was barren and Jacob wanted children. To sooth the anger of her husband, she instructed him to impregnate her handmaid Bilhah, while she watched, so that she “may also have children by her.”

The Sons of Jacob (the oppressors in this world) have applied this idea by forcing “immoral” yet fertile women to become “handmaids” for their ruling class, where they are used for breeding by their masters so that their wives may have children.

The show does not cut away in its unrelenting depiction of this “ceremony”. In fact, the show does not shy away from anything at all, laying bare the world created by Atwood in blinding, excruciating detail.

The story follows Offred (Elizabeth Moss) as she tries to survive her harrowing ordeal, hoping to one day return to the daughter she lost as she and her husband attempted to escape into Canada.

What’s striking about the show is how it hints at the speed of society’s unraveling. It was a sudden shift in a long process. Offred

likens it to boiling to death in a bathtub where the temperature is increased incrementally. A person might never even notice until it was too late. The setting is modern and archaic, terrifying and familiar, as if we are only steps away from this reality.

This is, of course, the point of any good dystopia. It should always hint at underlying problems found in our own world.

The Handmaid’s Tale offers this in spades, building the world through Offred’s thoughts (which come from Atwood’s own words) and through the sinister background details peppered throughout the show.

The performance by Moss is exceptional and layered, as well as is the performance

by Alexis Bledel, Offred’s handmaid partner Ofglen. Bledel is best known for her work on Gilmore Girls, but The Handmaid’s Tale offers her a chance to step outside her Rory Gilmore inspired persona into a much more meaty, complicated role.

She more than rises to the challenge, particularly in the episode “Late,” which features a nearly silent performance.

As with all prestige television of this type, The Handmaid’s Tale is beautiful and expertly filmed. The only drawback is that it requires a Hulu subscription.

Of course, a free 30-day trial of the service is offered but the company only released the first three episodes during its debut, opting to release a new episode every Wednesday afterwards. To watch the series, you will have to pay for one month of the service.

If Hulu offered better content that can’t be found elsewhere, this wouldn’t be a bad deal, but there isn’t much on Hulu that you couldn’t find on Amazon or Netflix. Still, I’d say TThe Handmaid’s Tale is worth $12.

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ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Inside The Art Of The Specialty T-Shirt Topher Neal and friends take a pre•poster•ous approach to wearable (and washable) art

"Prismatine" by Sandra Paynter Washburn

Experience “Renewal” At In-Town Gallery Springtime is here and with it the beautiful greenery of our city has come to life once again. Just like our seasons (used to) rotate regularly, the artwork at In-Town Gallery rotates as well. Every six months the art collections are removed to be replaced with a new set of inspiring, handcrafted paintings, glassware, jewelry, and more.

This Friday, experience the new spring-inspired collection known as “Renewal” as well as the opening reception from 5-8 pm. Featuring a wide range of mediums, this collection will showcase handcrafted woodworkings, beautiful watercolor paintings like Margaret Park’s “Holding Strong,” which depicts a lonely tree, bare and leaning into the pale, muted cotton candy colored sky, and amazing oil on canvas by Gay Arthur, who actually spent this past Tuesday hanging the pieces for “Renewal.”

While there are many reasons to attend this opening, the range of pieces that will be featured in “Renewal” is the greatest. Whether you’re into reclaimed metals crafted into sculptures or you prefer the simplicity of a canvas and color, In-Town’s newest collection will surely inspire.

In-Town’s special collection of interestingly handcrafted jewelry and home decor pieces may just make the perfect Mother’s Day gift. A metal bracelet, an acrylic necklace featuring bright, funky colors.

Wearable art is certainly something unique, and InTown Gallery is full to the brim with unique art of all kinds. Experience their opening reception this Friday to get an intimate look at the newest collection.

— Brooke Brown 14 • THE PULSE • MAY 4, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

Photo by Nick Jones

By Tont Mraz

Pulse contributor

T

HERE ARE MANY GOOD PRINTING COMpanies around town, but none are quite like pre•poster•ous. The tiny North Chattanooga startup has been in the printing business for several years, and in that time they have built a reputation for design excellence. In terms of materials, they aren’t doing much different than the competition—but when it comes to design, there is no competition.

When somebody points at a t-shirt and says that they like it, it’s the imagery that speaks to them.

They don’t usually feel the material of the shirt and ask about the thread count—it’s the logo, design, or message that they are drawn to.

It is this idea that propels pre•poster•ous. The business started one fateful day when a group of friends, Jonathan Deguzman, Kris Horn, Nick Jones and Topher Neal, were hanging out having brunch. They got to talking about joke T-shirts, and wondered why there weren’t very many companies making them.

The reason is that in most cases, it isn’t costeffective to make just a few shirts.

They pooled their resources, and began making funny shirts for themselves (you may have seen some of their iconic double entendres pulled from Kurt Vonnegut and Douglas Adams books). A friend asked them to print some shirts, then some bands and local venues got involved, and before they knew it, they were doing work for local businesses.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

“They don’t usually feel the material of the shirt and ask about the thread count—it’s the logo, design, or message that they are drawn to.”

“Upload a picture and we’ll print it for you in China” always looks terrible.

It’s hard to peg down what makes a good t-shirt, because everybody likes different things in different shirts.

Longevity of the decal is important, and it is based on the way it is screen printed or heat-transferred.

Principal Graphic Designer Topher Neal tells us, “A good shirt will last longer than what’s on it. A bad shirt has uneven hems, a sleeve poking into your back, and holes start showing up after a few washes.”

Nick Jones adds, “We want the art to outlast the money you put into it. After you outlive it, you can take it to a thrift store, and somebody else can get it and enjoy it as well.”

Though they still do work for local bands and music venues, pre•poster•ous is now focusing on affordable

small batch printing for start-ups and small businesses.

Topher tells us, “We prefer the small businesses, because well, that’s what we are. That’s what Chattanooga’s made of. It makes for a better client. Every time I work with a small business owner, they are straight forward and easy to talk to. We don’t have to be on hold, and talk to all of these different corporate departments. It’s really nice.” pre•poster•ous has recently expanded their operation with new equipment that allows them to print on nearly anything. Decals, signage, handbags, pens, stickers, posters, hats, bags, mousepads, coffee cups, pint glasses, brochures, pamphlets, envelopes, business cards, graphics for social media and websites, custom pads of paper with letterheads, and any other promotional materials. “If you want your name on it, we can do it for you.”

One of the ways they do this is with dye sublimation, a simple ink process. With what looks like a reg-

ular desktop printer, they print to a special kind of paper that is then used for a heat transfer.

They have a four-color screen printing station, custom exposure unit, and are able to do heat transfers with high detail and infinite colors.

They use their new plotter to make solid color vinyl decals, and 1-2 color car decals. They use a heat press for dye sublimation shirts, a flash dryer for screenprinted shirts, and a heat press for cups.

Topher leaves us with some thoughts on his process, saying “People listen to music, and in the back of their mind, they’re gonna see something. I try to do the same thing. It feels a lot less forced. Posters are what got me into graphic design.“ He continues, ”I’ve always been a big fan of street art, and posters are one of the coolest forms. They’re informative, and you can have so much fun with them. You can have something that’s zany and insane that has nothing to do with the subject of the poster, but at the same time, it does. You can use imagery to say something that you would otherwise use text for.”

Check them out online at thatspreposterous.com

THU5.4 Krish Mohan

Come and be part of a live taping of Kris's "Approaching Happiness" comedy show.

Plus, he's really funny.

8 p.m.

McHale’s Brewhouse 724 Ashland Ter. (423) 877-2124 mchalesbrewhouse.com

FRI5.5 Cinco de Mayo @ Area 61

Area 61 celebrates the holiday with a double showcase of art from Anna Carll and Paul Fontana.

5:30 p.m.

Area 61 Gallery 61 E. Main St. (423) 648-9367

SAT5.6 Festival of New Plays: Old Ties

Your final chance to see one of the most intriguing plays this Spring season.

7 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8538 theatrecenter.com

DON’T LET SUMMER

CATCH YOU OFF GUARD! Come by and browse through all of our fun outdoor ideas!

2020 Gunbarrel Rd, Ste 150 (423) 499-2882 CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MAY 4, 2017 • THE PULSE • 15

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT CALENDAR Armed Forces Day Parade

THURSDAY5.4 Ooltewah Farmers Market 3 p.m.

Ooltewah Nursery 5829 Main St. (423) 238-9775 ooltewahnursery.com Throwback Thursday 4 p.m.

The Hunter Museum of Art 10 Bluff View (423) 267-0968 huntermuseum.org Signal Mountain Farmers Market 4 p.m.

Pruett’s Market 1210 Taft Hwy. (423) 902-8023 signalmountainfarmersmarket.com Old Ties 7 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com Chattanooga Lookouts vs.

Pensacola Blue Wahoos 7:15 p.m.

AT&T Field 201 Power Alley (423) 267-4849 lookouts.com Greg Morton 7:30 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com Approaching Happiness with Comedian Krish Mohan 8 p.m.

16 • THE PULSE • MAY 4, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

McHale’s Brewhouse 724 Ashland Ter. (423) 877-2124 mchalesbrewhouse.com

FRIDAY5.5 68th Annual Armed Forces Day Parade 10:30 a.m.

Market St. @ MLK Blvd. chattareaveterans.com Chattanooga Market at Erlanger 10:30 a.m.

Erlanger Hospital Medical Mall 975 E. 3rd St. chattanoogamarket.com Cambridge Square Market 5 p.m.

Cambridge Square 9453 Bradmore Ln. (423) 531-7754

cambridgesqauretn.com RENEWAL: New Art for a New Season 5 p.m.

In-Town Gallery 26A Frazier Ave. (423) 267-9214 intowngallery.com Cinco de Mayo with Anna Carll & Paul Fontana 5:30 p.m.

Area 61 Gallery & Showroom 61 E. Main St. (423) 648-9367 Open Studio Nights: Inspired II 5:30 p.m.

302 W. 6th St. (423) 822-5750 chattanoogaworkspace.com Bunny Hop 6 p.m.

First Tennessee Pavilion 1829 Carter St.

ENTERTAINMENT SPOTLIGHT The "human cartoon", Greg has shared the stage with such comedy greats as Dave Chappell, Chris Rock, Howie Mandel, and The Muppets.

Yes, The Muppets!

Greg Morton The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com

(423) 468-1130 chamblisscenter.org Opening Reception with Erin Gafill, Dennis Heckler 6:30 p.m.

River Gallery 400 E. 2nd St. (423) 265-5033 river-gallery.com Chattanooga Lookouts vs.

Pensacola Blue Wahoos 7:15 p.m.

AT&T Field 201 Power Alley (423) 267-4849 lookouts.com Greg Morton 7:30, 9:45 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com Wide Open Floor 7:30 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347 barkinglegs.org Old Ties 8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com

SATURDAY5.6 3 State 3 Mountain Challenge 6 a.m.

Finley Stadium 1826 Carter St. 3state3mountain.org Market Street Mile &

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT CALENDAR

Chattanooga Latin Festival Ruby Dress Dash 8 a.m.

Market St. Downtown (423) 842-6265 chattanoogatrackclub.org Ride to the Bone Benefit Run 9 a.m.

Thunder Creek Harley-Davidson 7720 Lee Hwy. (423) 892-4888 thundercreekharley.com Latino Family Festival 9 a.m.

Chattanooga Zoo 301 N. Holtzclaw Ave. (423) 697-1319 chattzoo.org St. Alban’s Hixson Market 9:30 a.m.

St. Alban’s Episcopal Church 7514 Hixson Pike (423) 842-6303 Red Bank Jubilee Parade & MoonPie Festival 10 a.m.

Red Bank Main City Park Tom Weathers Dr. redbanktn.gov Northside Farmers Market 10 a.m.

Northside Presbyterian Church 923 Mississippi Ave. (423) 266-7497 Chattanooga River Market 10 a.m.

Tennessee Aquarium Plaza 1 Broad St. (423) 648-2496 chattanoogarivermarket.com Chattanooga Latin Festival 11 a.m.

Highland Park Commons 2000 Union Ave. chattanoogastate.edu

Brainerd Farmers Market 11 a.m.

Grace Episcopal Church 20 Belvoir Ave. (404) 245-3682 Festival Reading: The White Rose 4 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com Tell Me Something Derby 4:30 p.m.

Black Creek Golf Club 4700 Cummings Cove Dr. (423) 822-2582 blackcreekclub.com Chattanooga Lookouts vs.

Pensacola Blue Wahoos 7:15 p.m.

AT&T Field 201 Power Alley (423) 267-4849 lookouts.com Greg Morton 7:30, 9:45 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com Old Ties 8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com Festival Reading: Fiddle of Gold 8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com

SUNDAY5.7 Chattanooga Market 11 a.m.

First Tennessee Pavilion 1829 Carter St. (423) 648-2496 chattanoogamarket.com Latino Family Festival 9 a.m.

Chattanooga Zoo 301 N. Holtzclaw Ave. (423) 697-1319 chattzoo.org 3rd Annual Taste of Ooltewah and Harrison 12:30 p.m.

Cambridge Square 9453 Bradmore Ln. (423) 290-2134 d9strong.com Free Fiddle School 2 p.m.

Fiddlers Anonymous 2248 Dayton Blvd.

(423) 994-7497 World Laughter Day 2 p.m.

Coolidge Park 150 River St. worldlaughterday.com Chattanooga Lookouts vs.

Pensacola Blue Wahoos 2:15 p.m.

AT&T Field 201 Power Alley (423) 267-4849 lookouts.com Old Ties 2:30 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534

theatrecentre.com Greg Morton 7:30 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com

MONDAY5.8 Red Bank Farmers Market 3 p.m.

Red Bank United Methodist 3800 Dayton Blvd.

(423) 838-9804

TUESDAY5.9 Tuesday Night Chess Club 6 p.m.

Downtown Library 1001 Broad St. (423) 643-7700 chattilibrary.com

WEDNESDAY5.10 Chattanooga Market 10:30 a.m.

Erlanger East Hospital 1751 Gunbarrel Rd. chattanoogamarket.com Main Street Market 4 p.m.

522 W. Main St. mainstfarmersmarket.com Map these locations on chattanoogapulse.com. Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@chattanoogapulse.com CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MAY 4, 2017 • THE PULSE • 17

18 • THE PULSE • MAY 4, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

COLUMN ∙ THE ART OF BUSINESS

The Spice & Tea Exchange Offering the finest herbs, spices, teas, exotic rices, sea salts and more

By Brooke Brown

Pulse Assistant Editor

A

S THE PULSE HAS NOTED ON many occasions, Chattanooga features some very unique shops and restaurants. A newcomer specializing in spices, salts, peppers, sugars and teas popped up on Gunbarrel last September and will be your new go-to for loose leaf teas, custom blended spices and rubs, and so much more.

Owners Mike and Diane Tobin have opened a passion project that is certainly going to spice up your kitchen! Spices in every color line the wall of shelves to your right, from deep reds to pale oranges, each glass container filled with varying aromas of rich seasonings. All spices are custom blended in the shop to create something truly unique and so much more than just a store-bought spice.

“We’re your neighbors, and we want to help you create a wonderful cup of tea or delicious dish for dinner,” says Diane.

The custom spice wall features everything from Bloody Mary and popcorn seasoning, to fish and steak rubs. But their number one blend, Tuscany, is truly to die for. The perfect blend for grilled chicken? Tuscany. For a to-die-for bowl of tomato soup? Tuscany.

For a delicious seasoning on pasta? Of course, Tuscany. It’s a blend you genuinely can’t go wrong with and will certainly spice up your weeknight dinners.

Do you pride yourself in your own per-

The Spice & Tea Exchange Open M-S, 10a-9p, Sun. 1p-6p 2115 Gunbarrel Road (423) 826-7707 www.spiceandtea.com

sonal spice blends?

“We can custom blend spices you already use in your recipes, and kick them up a notch,” says Diane. Spice and Tea Exchange can help you take the simplest of dishes and make them five star.

And with their custom blending, you’ll know that you’re getting a quality product without preservatives or additives. All spices that can be purchased in the store list the ingredients on the back of the packet, and not one filler will be found on any ingredient list.

Only the finest and simplest components make up the incredible selection of spices, teas, sugars, and salts The Spice and Tea Exchange offers. Unsure of what to make for dinner tonight? Check out one of their recipe cards for a little inspiration!

And as for tea, prepare yourself for a wall of wonder.

“We offer loose leaf teas, not baggies,” says Assistant Manager and daughter to the Tobins, Mary Tobin. “Black, green, and herbal are our choices. And the Blood Orange Smoothie is a favorite of mine and our guests. It smells and tastes like an Orange Creamsicle.”

A tea expert it seems, Mary can guide you on your journey to the perfect cup. If you’ve been drinking tea produced from pouring hot water over tea bags filled with tea leaf dust, you haven’t enjoyed a worthy cup.

Brewing loose leaf teas steeps a more flavorful cup, but if you’re feeling a little overwhelmed at the

“Only the finest and simplest components make up the incredible selection of spices, teas, sugars, and salts The Spice and Tea Exchange offers.” idea of learning to brew your own loose leaf, fear not because “Tea School”, a one hour closed door event, is offered every Sunday.

Call ahead to make a reservation for the 12-1 slot, 1-2, or 6-7 and enjoy the privacy of learning the subtle art that is brewing a wonderful cup of tea. They’ll provide you with the skills and tools needed to confidently recreate your perfect cup at home.

Beyond the savory spices and teas, flavor infused sugars are offered as well. Fruity flavors such as blueberry, lemon, and raspberry.

Fun flavors such as ginger, apple cinnamon crisp, or salted caramel.

Their vanilla sugar is made right

here in the store by blending fine Madagascar vanilla beans with organic turbinado sugar. It makes for an organically flavored sweetener that would be the perfect addition to a cup of coffee or any vanilla flavored baking ventures. Try sprinkling some flavor sugars on sliced apples or other fruits for a great afternoon treat the kids will love!

At Spice and Tea Exchange, you’ll be whisked away into culinary adventures you never imagined possible, all washed down with a cup of warm, homebrewed tea.

[An inside scoop: Ask for the Glorious Creme Blend. It’s a speciality blend of Diane’s own creation and not available on shelves!]

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MAY 4, 2017 • THE PULSE • 19

MUSIC

Mythical Motors Are Running The Shine Powerpop group hits their groove with new release

The Pretty Reckless Rocks Out Track 29 When I really like something, I surround myself with it.

For example, I really loved the show Gossip Girl in my late high school, early college days, and because I loved it so much I absorbed every piece of media to do with any of the major characters.

I’d watch previous movies they’d been in, shows they’d guest starred on, etc. So when one of my favorite characters Jenny Humphrey, (actually known as Taylor Momsen) debuted a rock band known as The Pretty Reckless, I was automatically in love.

The Pretty Reckless will be performing their alt rock sound at Track 29 on Sunday. Their music progressed as I grew up and out of that phase, and seems to have taken a very dark turn into a much more sinister sound and feel than what I experienced as a slightly edgy teen, but Momsen’s vocals and her band’s peak rock performance has held true.

Songs off their most recent album Who You Selling For feature names like, “The Devil’s Back,” “Prisoner,” and “Take Me Down,” whose single cover art featured a naked Momsen shrouded in a simple black robe and a giant black cross turned downward pointing arrow painted on her bare chest and stomach.

It’ll certainly be an interesting and electric show that surely won’t be lacking in angst and aggression. And lots of black clothing. — Brooke Brown The Pretty Reckless Sunday, 9 p.m.

Track 29 1400 Market St. (423) 521-2929 www.track29.co 20 • THE PULSE • MAY 4, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

By Marc T. Michael Pulse Music Editor

M

YTHICAL MOTORS, CHATTANOOga’s favorite powerpop quartet, has just put the finishing touches on their latest album, set for release later this month. Running the Shine is the title of this upcoming collection of sixteen new tunes by messieurs Addison, Brown, Smith and Wingo, and it is a sterling example of how a great band just keeps getting better and better.

Much has already been written about the band and its style, but two key identifying features are always worth mentioning again. The guitar tone is a perfect blend of raw and refined, or rather the tone is raw, the playing is refined.

It is the sort of rough-edged sound a hapless Nashville producer would sterilize and suck all the life out of; how fortunate the boys in the band are

too smart for that nonsense. Instead they opt to keep the “garage band” guitar sound, taming it with the kind of skillful and nuanced playing that comes from your garage band days being a few decades safely behind you.

Counterpointing the six-string sting are the cool, laidback, almost gentle vocals, evocative of psychedelic era Beatles and maybe a bit of Robyn Hitchcock.

There are plenty of bands that utilize either a similar guitar or a similar vocal style, but it is the alchemical combination of the two that gives Mythical Motors their signature sound and enduring popularity. The new album is replete with it.

It’s impossible to squeeze in a comprehensive review of sixteen tracks in a space this limited, so it becomes necessary to focus on a few stand-out tracks. That’s easier said than done since Mythical Motors takes such care in crafting their music that every song is a stand-out in its own right. That

MUSIC

“There are plenty of bands that utilize either a similar guitar or a similar vocal style, but it is the alchemical combination of the two that gives Mythical Motors their signature sound and enduring popularity.” being said, the opening track, “Let the Balloons Fly,” is classic Mythical Motors.

A rollicking guitar opens the tune which quickly settles in to a smooth, laid-back verse and then a chorus with interplay between major and minor scales from the vocals and chorus. Therein lays the genius of the band.

A tune that could have been pretty straightforward introduces a twist that is both unexpected and yet pleasing to the ear. It’s almost as though little gems and Easter eggs are incorporated in to the music adding a layer of unpredictability that sets them miles apart from other bands with a similar sound. The lead guitar on this particular tune is the final ingredient in a delightful new recipe. It is pure mid-sixties tone, slicing through the rest of the song like an Amboy Dukes era scalpel.

The album’s titular track, “Running the Shine,” captures what, for me, is a golden age in modern music. See, I’m “of a certain age,” and college

radio in the early to mid-nineties was a candy store of new and interesting music when you could set the dial, let it play all day and never hear a dud.

Perhaps there is just as much good stuff today, but it feels like the good stuff is watered down by a lot of not-so-good stuff so, yeah, mid-nineties alt-rock was a high water mark I think, and the title track of the album captures that era in a way that makes an increasingly grumpy old man decidedly less so.

“Spiritual West” is a sonically luscious Beatles-esque entry and “Place of Only Midnight” channels the ghost of a younger Elvis Costello. Yes, Old Elvis Costello is still alive and kicking, but this music hearkens back to a time when he produced pop with an edge, music that was hip but still radio friendly and maybe that’s the best description I can muster for what Mythical Motors is and does. Edgy pop, cool enough for the discerning snob, pretty enough for the masses. That’s a narrow line to walk, but Mythical Motors does it masterfully every time they play.

The album is Running the Shine and it drops May 27 on CD and cassette (yes, cassette!)

Find the band online via Facebook or the usual distribution points to get your copy.

Upcoming Shows You Do Not Want To Miss Two big shows on the radar so far this month.

The first is this Friday, May 5th, at Ziggy’s Cinco de Mayo party.

The roster features such heavy hitters as Sweet GA Brown, Baz Shaw and B. Kidd, The ExLaws, Derrtie Sanchez and Destiny Surreal, The Burchays, and finally, the triumphant return of the one and only Bob Carty. The show starts at 8 p.m.

Then on May 20th, the always kick ass PLVNET is proud to present “10,000 Days, A Night Of Tool” at the Revelry Room. The show is 18+ with Rye Baby set to open.

The boys, who are all huge fans of Tool, are working on a new album and have decided to fund it in a most intriguing and novel way, by actually, you know, playing a gig.

In an era where more and more bands seem to start a GoFundMe or Kickstarter to raise money for

PLVNET

recording, PLVNET is doing it the old fashioned way.

In an effort to provide the most authentic experience possible, they’ve set aside their own songwriting for the last several months in order to focus on mastering every aspect of this loving tribute show, from the songs to the tone of guitars and drums, right down to the lighting and stage tech.

It has all the makings of a killer show with the added bonus that your attendance paves the way for a new PLVNET album, always a cause for excitement.

— Marc T. Michael

THU4.27

FRI4.28

SAT4.29

Dexateens

Broccoli Samurai

Glass Hammer

Come on over to JJ's after the Drive By Truckers show for the afterparty with Dexateens and special guest Lew Card.

11 p.m.

JJ's Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jsbohemia.com

The band's synth-laden, drum and bass influenced, progressive electronica has been thrilling audiences throughout the country.

10 p.m.

Clyde’s On Main 122 W. Main St. clydesonmain.com

Legendary local progrock pioneers perform Valkyrie in its entirerty (and more) live. With special guest Sydney Heath.

7:30 p.m.

The Camp House 149 E. MLK Blvd. thecamphouse.com CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MAY 4, 2017 • THE PULSE • 21

LIVE MUSIC CALENDAR

Drive By Truckers

THURSDAY5.4 Bachata on the Bluff: Live Latin Music 5 p.m.

The Hunter Museum of American Art 10 Bluff View huntermuseum.org James Crumble Trio 6 p.m.

St. John’s Meeting Place 1278 Market St. stjohnsrestaurant.com Rick Rushing 6 p.m.

Backstage Bar 29 Station St. backstagechattanooga.com Forever Bluegrass 6 p.m.

Whole Foods Market 301 Manufacturers Rd. wholefoodsmarket.com Every Time I Die 7 p.m.

Revelry Room 41 Station St. revelryroom.co Legends of Jazz: John Coltrane, featuring Greg Tardy Swing Serenade 7:30 p.m.

Barking Legs Theatre 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Bluegrass Thursdays 7:30 p.m.

Feed Co. Table & Tavern 201 W. Main St. feedtableandtavern.com Jesse James & Tim Neal 7:30 p.m.

22 • THE PULSE • MAY 4, 2017 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

Mexi-Wing VII 5773 Brainerd Rd. mexi-wingchattanooga.com Keepin’ It Local 8 p.m.

The Social 1110 Market St. publichousechattanooga.com Open Mic Night with Hap Henninger 9 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com Drive By Truckers 9 p.m.

Track 29 1400 Market St. track29.co Dexateens, Lew Card 11 p.m.

JJ's Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jsbohemia.com

FRIDAY5.5 Somethin’ Else 6 p.m.

Las Margaritas Skyview 4604 Skyview Dr. (423) 892-3065 Sweet Georgia Sound 6 p.m.

Cambridge Square Night Market 9453 Bradmore Ln. chattanoogamarket.com San Rafael Band, Unprotected Rex 7 p.m.

Miller Plaza 850 Market St. nightfallchattanooga.com JJ Grey & Mofro 7:30 p.m.

Track 29 1400 Market St. track29.co

PULSE MUSIC SPOTLIGHT The free Nightfall concert series kicks off the year with the San Rafael Band, showcasing a Latininfused performance in celebration of Cinco De Mayo.

San Rafael Band Friday, 8 p.m.

Miller Plaza 850 Market St. nightfallchattanooga.com

Roughwork 8:30 p.m.

The Foundry 1201 Broad St. chattanooganhotel.com Cinco De Socro 9 p.m.

JJ's Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jsbohemia.com Hap Henninger 9 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com Broccoli Samurai 10 p.m.

Clyde’s On Main 122 W. Main St. clydesonmain.com P-B-R Band 10 p.m.

Bud’s Sports Bar 5751 Brainerd Rd. budssportsbar.com

SATURDAY5.6 Matt Downer 12:30 p.m.

Tennessee Aquarium Plaza 1 Broad St. chattanoogarivermarket.com Glass Hammer 7:30 p.m.

The Camp House 149 E. MLK Blvd. thecamphouse.com Imparables ft. Adrian Uribe & Omar Chaparro 8 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre 709 Broad St.

LIVE MUSIC CALENDAR

JJ Grey & Mofro tivolichattanooga.com The Pool: British Invasion Rock & Roll 8 p.m.

Songbirds Guitar Museum 35 Station St. songbirdsguitars.com Adam & Chris Carroll, Lew Card 8 p.m.

Barking Legs Theatre 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Roughwork 8:30 p.m.

The Foundry 1201 Broad St. chattanooganhotel.com Funk You 9 p.m.

Revelry Room 41 Station St. revelryroom.co Brother Hawk, ET, Sean Lucy 9 p.m.

JJ's Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jsbohemia.com Koko & Karma Duo 10 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com P-B-R Band 10 p.m.

Bud’s Sports Bar 5751 Brainerd Rd. budssportsbar.com

SUNDAY5.7 Play Along With The CSO 11 a.m.

First Tennessee Pavilion 1829 Carter St. chattanoogamarket.com James Hattem & The Transfers 11 a.m.

Flying Squirrel Bar 55 Johnson St. flyingsquirrelbar.com If Birds Could Fly 1 p.m.

Flying Squirrel Bar 55 Johnson St. flyingsquirrelbar.com Tommy Emmanuel 6 p.m.

Songbirds Guitar Museum 35 Station St. (423) 531-2473 songbirdsguitars.com Brian Wilson presents Pet Sounds: The Final Performances 7 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre 709 Broad St. tivolichattanooga.com Nathan Mell 7 p.m.

The BackStage Bar 29 Station St. (423) 629-2233 The Pretty Reckless 9 p.m.

Track 29 1400 Market St. track29.co

MONDAY5.8 Monday Nite Big Band 7 p.m.

The Coconut Room 6925 Shallowford Rd.

thepalmsathamilton.com Very Open Mic with Shawnessey Cargile 8 p.m.

The Well 1800 Rossville Blvd. #8 wellonthesouthside.com Open Air with Jessica Nunn 7:30 p.m.

The Granfalloon 400 E. Main St. granfalloonchattanooga.com

TUESDAY5.9 Danimal 6 p.m.

Backstage Bar 29 Station St. backstagechattanooga.com Bill McCallie and In Cahoots 6:30 p.m.

Southern Belle 201 Riverfront Pkwy. chattanoogariverboat.com Tim Moore, Dereke Wayne Martin, Ethen Marton, Jamion Williams 7 p.m.

Heritage House Arts and Civic Center 1428 Jenkins Rd. chattanooga.gov John Kadlecik Acousti’Lectric 8 p.m.

Revelry Room 41 Station St. revelryroom.co Open Mic with Mike McDade 8 p.m.

Tremont Tavern 1203 Hixson Pike tremonttavern.com

WEDNESDAY5.10 Noontunes with Swayyvo Noon Miller Plaza 850 Market St. noontunescha.com Toby Hewitt 6 p.m.

Backstage Bar 29 Station St. backstagechattanooga.com Free Old Time Fiddle & Banjo Show 6:30 p.m.

Fiddler’s Anonymous 2248 Dayton Blvd.

(423) 994-7497 Joel Clyde 8 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com Priscilla & Little Rickee 8 p.m.

Las Margaritas 1101 Hixson Pike (423) 756-3332 Jazz in the Lounge 8 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Blonde Bones 8 p.m.

JJ's Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jsbohemia.com Map these locations on chattanoogapulse.com. Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@chattanoogapulse.com CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MAY 4, 2017 • THE PULSE • 23

RECORD REVIEWS ∙ ERNIE PAIK

Alan Courtis Los Galpones, Various Artists Sammlung

Alan Courtis Los Galpones (Fabrica)

T

he album Los Galpones (“The Sheds”) from Argentinian musician Alan Courtis (also known for his work in the group Reynols) is the latest in a twisty and prolific career with a voluminous catalog numbering over one hundred releases and numerous collaborations.

A specific quote came to mind when listening to its first track, the 15-minute “Hombrear”: the famous, final words of Samuel Beckett’s “The Unnamable”, which read, “You must go on, I can’t go on, I’ll go on” with its strained determination; one must speak (or create) or risk being extinguished, silently

ceasing to exist (while sipping espresso, stroking a goatee and wearing a beret).

The track uses guitar drones, no-wave-style dissonance, squeaks and percussive thumps to pull the listener in closely with its unstoppable, unconventional march; it’s beyond persuasion, into the realm of compelling force.

The listener is instructed that “This album should be played loud,” and certainly, to get the full effect, it should not only be heard but also be physically felt.

Played on speakers at a volume that isn’t too loud to hit the pain threshold but loud enough so that various objects vibrate in one’s listening room. Primarily created using a guitar plus found objects, Los Galpones is not oppressively abrasive, but it is definitely dark and sinister.

“Hombrear” is followed by the shorter track “Aparcero,” which sounds more like an abstract percussion piece than a guitar piece, using what sounds like springs, string scrapes and backwards sound manipulation to offer a despairing rustling. “Estiba” uses a completely different

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sound palette, with vibrating metal and sustained gong-like tones; its minimalist rhythms phase in and out in entrancing ways, making its 15-minute duration melt away.

The final track “Corralon” is perhaps the most melodic number among the fascinating mess; while centered on a single tone, its unconventional counterpoint can be found lurking in the weeds, playfully dancing around the monolithic note with ringing tones—the sounds are melancholy, but not as much as the silence that follows.

Various Artists Sammlung (Bureau B)

T

he German city of Düsseldorf can boast of some

musical heavy-hitters such as the pioneering electronic group Kraftwerk, the punk band Die Toten Hosen and the new wave outfit Deutsch Amerikanische Freundschaft (a.k.a. D.A.F.), but there’s also its musical history that’s lost in the margins.

The compilation Sammlung, subtitled “Elektronische Kassettenmusik, Düsseldorf 1982-1989,” is a zeitgeist snapshot of Düsseldorf’s ‘80s electronic underground that is oddly charming, even if too obscure to be influential.

Some of Sammlung perhaps sounds like synth-heavy new wave but free from any pop obligations or aspirations, while other parts sound more like an extension of avant-garde electro-acoustic music.

There’s a sketchbook feel to many of these tracks, not because they’re unfinished or half-baked, but due to the unencumbered attitude with a freedom to explore.

Strangely, for this writer, there’s less of an evident Krautrock/kosmische influence at play here than expected, and post-punk and

industrial flavors only seep through occasionally, like on the moody closing number “Dörper’s Dream” from ADD. The opening track “F” from Konrad Kraft uses almost comical splat sounds along with horror-soundtrack synths, creating a bizarre disconnect among chimpy, staccato notes, and Dino Oon’s “Nr. 6” is a nightmarish stew with piercing, echoing sound-stabs.

“Boston” by Strafe Für Rebellion (“Punishment for Rebellion”) is one of the collection’s more unusual tracks, with the sound of howling dogs, snipping percussion and a twilight atmosphere; on it, a low male voice repeats the words “The cash box is empty,” which is hard to not hear as some kind of satire, parodying much-tooserious art wankery.

It would be too much of a stretch to call this a treasure trove of unearthed masterpieces, putting things in perspective; however, it’s evidence of an effervescent scene marked with curiosity, stoked by affordable technology, and percolating ideas.

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MAY 4, 2017 • THE PULSE • 25

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY on needless filler. But wait, there’s more: Clear thinking and precise speech just might be your superpowers. As a result, your powers of persuasion should intensify. Your ability to advocate for your favorite causes may zoom.

ROB BREZSNY TAURUS (April 20-May 20): When poet Wislawa Szymborska delivered her speech for winning the Nobel Prize, she said that “whatever else we might think of this world—it is astonishing.” She added that for a poet, there really is no such thing as the “ordinary world,” “ordinary life,” and “the ordinary course of events.” In fact, “Nothing is usual or normal. Not a single stone and not a single cloud above it. Not a single day and not a single night after it. And above all, not a single existence, not anyone’s existence in this world.” I offer you her thoughts, Taurus, because I believe that in the next two weeks you will have an extraordinary potential to feel and act on these truths. You are hereby granted a license to be astonished on a regular basis.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Would you consider enrolling in my SelfPity Seminar? If so, you would learn that obsessing on self-pity is a means to an end, not a morass to get lost in. You would feel sorry for yourself for brief, intense periods so that you could feel proud and brave the rest of the time. For a given period—let’s say three days—you would indulge and indulge and indulge in self-pity until you entirely exhausted that emotion. Then you’d be free to engage in an orgy of selfhealing, self-nurturing, and self-celebration. Ready to get started? Ruminate about the ways that people don’t fully appreciate you.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): In a typical conversation, most of us utter too many “uhs,” “likes,” “I means,” and “you knows.” I mean, I’m sure that… uh…you’ll agree that, like, what’s the purpose of, you know, all that pointless noise? But I have some good news to deliver about your personal use of language in the coming weeks, Cancerian. According to my reading of the astrological omens, you’ll have the potential to dramatically lower your reliance

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LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In 1668, England named John Dryden its first Poet Laureate. His literary influence was so monumental that the era in which he published was known as the Age of Dryden. Twentieth-century poetry great T. S. Eliot said he was “the ancestor of nearly all that is best in the poetry of the eighteenth century.” Curiously, Dryden had a low opinion of Shakespeare.

“Scarcely intelligible,” he called the Bard, adding, “His whole style is so pestered with figurative expressions that it is as affected as it is coarse.” I foresee a comparable clash of titans in your sphere, Leo. Two major influences may fight it out for supremacy. One embodiment of beauty may be in competition with another. One powerful and persuasive force could oppose another.

What will your role be? Mediator?

Judge? Neutral observer? Whatever it is, be cagey.

Homework: Which of your dead ancestors would you most like to talk to? Imagine a conversation with one of them. you are.” That’s the message I saw on an Instagram meme. I immediately thought of you. The truth is that up until recently, you have not been fully prepared for the useful but demanding gifts the genie could offer you. You haven’t had the selfmastery necessary to use the gifts as they’re meant to be used, and therefore they were a bit dangerous to you. But that situation has changed. Although you may still not be fully primed, you’re as ready as you can be. That’s why I say: RUB THE MAGIC LAMP!

inventory. Once you identify any mom-like qualities that tend to limit your freedom or lead you away from your dreams, devise a plan to transform them. You may never be able to defuse them entirely, but there’s a lot you can do to minimize the mischief they cause. Be calm but calculating in setting your intention, Aquarius!

P.S.: In the course of your inventory, you may also find there are ways you are like your mother that are of great value to you. Is there anything you could do to more fully develop their potential?

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Just this once, and for a limited time only, you have cosmic clearance to load up on sugary treats, leave an empty beer can in the woods, watch stupid TV shows, and act uncool in front of the Beautiful People. Why? Because being totally well-behaved and perfectly composed and strictly pure would compromise your mental health more than being naughty.

Besides, if you want to figure out what you are on the road to becoming, you will need to know more about what you’re not.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): You may have heard the exhortation “Follow your bliss!”, which was popularized by mythologist Joseph Campbell. After studying the archetypal stories of many cultures throughout history, he concluded that it was the most important principle driving the success of most heroes. Here’s another way to say it: Identify the job or activity that deeply excites you, and find a way to make it the center of your life. In his later years, Campbell worried that too many people had misinterpreted “Follow your bliss” to mean “Do what comes easily.” That’s all wrong, he said. Anything worth doing takes work and struggle. “Maybe I should have said, ‘Follow your blisters,’” he laughed. I bring this up, Sagittarius, because you are now in an intense “Follow your blisters” phase of following your bliss.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “We are what we imagine,” writes Piscean author N. Scott Momaday. “Our very existence consists in our imagination of ourselves. Our best destiny is to imagine who and what we are.

The greatest tragedy that can befall us is to go unimagined.” Let’s make this passage your inspirational keynote for the coming weeks. It’s a perfect time to realize how much power you have to create yourself through the intelligent and purposeful use of your vivid imagination. (P.S. Here’s a further tip, this time from Cher: “All of us invent ourselves. Some of us just have more imagination than others.”)

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): In addition to fashion tips, advice for the broken-hearted, midlife-crisis support, and career counseling, I sometimes provide you with more mystical help. Like now. So if you need nuts-and-bolts guidance, I hope you’ll have the sense to read a more down-to-earth horoscope. What I want to tell you is that the metaphor of resurrection is your featured theme. You should assume that it’s somehow the answer to every question. Rejoice in the knowledge that although a part of you has died, it will be reborn in a fresh guise.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): The versatile artist Melvin Van Peebles has enjoyed working as a filmmaker, screenwriter, actor, composer, and novelist. One of his more recent efforts was a collaboration with the experimental band The Heliocentrics. Together they created a science-fiction-themed spoken-word poetry album titled The Last Transmission. Peebles told NPR, “I haven’t had so much fun with clothes on in years.” If I’m reading the planetary omens correctly Capricorn, you’re either experiencing that level of fun, or will soon be doing so.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “Are you ready for the genie’s favors?

Don’t rub the magic lamp unless

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In what ways do you most resemble your mother? Now is a good time to take

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Beware of feeling sorry for sharks that yell for help. Beware of trusting coyotes that act like sheep and sheep that act like coyotes. Beware of nibbling food from jars whose contents are different from what their labels suggest. But wait! “Beware” is not my only message for you. I have these additional announcements: Welcome interlopers if they’re humble and look you in the eyes. Learn all you can from predators and pretenders without imitating them.

Take advantage of any change that’s set in motion by agitators who shake up the status quo, even if you don’t like them.

Rob Brezsny is an aspiring master of curiosity, perpetrator of sacred uproar, and founder of the Beauty and Truth Lab. He brings a literate, myth-savvy perspective to his work.

It’s all in the stars.

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MAY 4, 2017 • THE PULSE • 27

OPINIONS & DIVERSIONS

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JONESIN' CROSSWORD ∙ MATT JONES

“Freedonia”—just another themeless jam.

ACROSS 1 Contrary to 8 Bear or hare, e.g.

14 Having divisions 15 Meadow Soprano’s mom 16 Big-name celeb 17 Quechua dish served in corn husks 18 Adult Swim programming block 19 They create spots, slangily 20 Bone, in Italian dishes 21 Andy’s sitcom boy 22 Mail submission accompaniment, briefly 23 Flavor in the juice aisle 27 Dutch scientist for whom an astronomical “cloud” is named 28 1998 British Open winner Mark 29 “All-American” Rockne 30 In a shadowy way 33 Person pulling out 35 Hero of “Cold

Mountain” 36 Beer belly 38 Light horsedrawn carriage 39 Place to belt and belt 43 G, in the key of C 44 Benedict of “The A-Team” 45 Top pick 46 Unable to follow up with action, it’s said 48 Displayed derision 51 Napoleon’s hat, e.g.

52 Moderately sweet, as champagne 53 More like a sieve 54 Sashimi staple 55 Going to the post office, e.g.

56 Compilation album series with cleaned-up lyrics DOWN 1 Director of “The 40-Year-Old Virgin” 2 Half of a rainyday pair

3 Melodic passages 4 “Objection!”

5 1920s leading lady _ _ _ Naldi 6 Place for a wine charm 7 Actress Hatcher 8 2017 IrishCanadian film with Sally Hawkins and Ethan Hawke 9 French military force 10 2009, in the credits 11 Apportions 12 Individually, on a menu 13 Pixar Chief Creative Officer John 15 Westchester County town where the Clintons have lived since 1999 21 Paddle kin 24 Key of Dvorak’s “New World” Symphony (abbr.)

25 Pomade relative 26 Singer of the movie theme song that hit #1 on

August 11, 1984 27 Busted 29 It comes with a high proof 30 Ripe for the insulting 31 More wicked 32 Division for Road & Track, maybe 34 Skip-Bo relative 37 Doubleoccupancy ship?

39 Baked in an oven, like bricks 40 Name for Bruce Wayne’s underwater vehicle 41 Nivea competitor 42 Railroad station porter 44 “Beyond the Sea” subject Bobby 47 Plum variety also called bubblegum plum 48 Badlands Natl. Park site 49 Nostalgic soft drink brand 50 Actor/comedian Djalili of “The Mummy”

Copyright © 2017 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per3minute. Must be 18+ to call. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle No. 830 CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • MAY 4, 2017 • THE PULSE • 29

FOOD & DRINK ∙ SUSHI & BISCUITS

Betrayal Only Happens... ...where there is love. The love for a perfect meat sauce, that is.

Mike McJunkin Pulse columnist

It always starts so innocently and so full of hope. Promises whispered carelessly, kindling a fire that has burned quietly and passionately since its embers were first sparked so many years ago. The mere mention of tender, supple pasta being lovingly embraced by rich, tomatoey, meat sauce will inevitably, and immediately overwhelm my senses with bristling expectation.

But far too often, my beloved meat sauce has betrayed me. This betrayal is rarely a simple matter of taste; even craft-storeclearance-table-come-to-life Sandra Lee can cobble together a reasonable facsimile of basic meat sauce flavors. The betrayal that repeatedly dashes my hopes of a rich, pasta-cuddling sauce is one of depth and texture.

A proper tomato-based meat sauce* INGREDIENTS • 1 quart chicken stock • 1 to 1 1/2 ounces powdered gelatin (4 to 6 packets) • 1 (28-ounce) can peeled whole tomatoes • ½ pound finely minced chicken livers • ¼ cup extra-virgin olive oil • 1.5 pound ground chuck (about 20% fat) • 1.5 pound ground pork shoulder (about 20% fat) • Kosher salt and black pepper • 4 tablespoons unsalted butter • ½ pound finely diced bacon • 1 large onion, finely minced

should form a close, loving bond with its chosen pasta. Watching a garnet red meat sauce slide impotently off a raised forkful of pasta is a tragic betrayal I would never wish on even my greatest enemy (I haven’t forgotten about you Guy Fieri). Meat sauce must always cling to the pasta—no excuses and no exceptions.

Along with the proper texture, the flavor should have depth and complexity. If a meat sauce isn’t given the love and attention it deserves, the flavor will remain flaccid and unsatisfying, never rising to its full potential—and that is sad; so very sad.

After years of trial, error and disappointment, I have perfected the perfect meat sauce recipe. It’s thick and rich with a silky texture that wraps it’s loving, meaty arms around whatever pasta it is paired with. Yes, it includes non-traditional ingredients like gelatin, fish sauce and bacon, but it’s the chicken liv-

• 4 cloves garlic, minced • ¼ cup minced fresh oregano and basil • ½ cup minced fresh parsley, divided • 2 cups dry red wine • 2 bay leaves • ½ cup heavy cream • 3 ounces grated Parmesan cheese • 2 tablespoons fish sauce • Pappardelle or tagliatelle pasta DIRECTIONS Place stock in a medium bowl and sprinkle with gelatin. Set aside. Purée tomatoes until smooth. Set aside. Purée chicken livers in food processor or with immersion blender until smooth. Set

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ers that quietly and subtly turn this great meat sauce into the perfect meat sauce. Yes. Chicken livers.

Chicken livers may seem like a very unlikely ingredient for a meat sauce. Purée those chicken livers and they seem like an unlikely ingredient for anything other than catfish bait or an Eli Roth film. But done properly, they add depth, creaminess, and pasta-clinging body to the sauce without the livery taste (the liver flavor fades during cooking). To get the best out aside.

Heat olive oil in a large, heavy bottomed pot over high heat until shimmering. Add ground beef and pork, season with salt and pepper, and cook (breaking up the meat as you go) until no longer pink. Remove from heat and stir in puréed chicken livers.

Meanwhile, cook bacon in a large skillet over medium-high heat until fat has mostly rendered. Add onion, celery, garlic, sage, half the parsley and cook until vegetables are soft but not browned, about 6 minutes.

Put the vegetable mixture into the pot with meat mixture, add wine and cook, stirring, until mostly evaporated. Add

of your livers, buy the freshest you can find and soak them in milk overnight to draw out excess blood and tame the gaminess just a bit.

Stop squirming and try it—the livers will be our little secret. *I’m avoiding the word “bolognese” to inoculate myself against an attack from filone di renella wielding members of L’Accademia italiana della cucina.

Mike McJunkin is a native Chattanoogan currently living abroad in the Far East who has trained chefs, owned and operated restaurants. Join him on Facebook at facebook.com/SushiAndBiscuits

stock, tomatoes, and bay leaves. Season with salt and pepper.

Bring sauce to a simmer, then reduce the heat to low and cook (stirring occasionally) until liquid has almost completely reduced and sauce is rich and thick -about 3.

Carefully skim off all but ¼ to ½ cup of fat, then vigorously stir in heavy cream, Parmesan, fish sauce, and remaining parsley. Bring to a boil on stovetop, continuing to stir constantly.

Fine tune the seasoning with salt and pepper if needed.

Serve over tagliatelle or pappardelle with a generous sprinkling of Grana Padano.

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