The Pulse 16.30 » July 25, 2019

VOL. 16, ISSUE 30 • JULY 25, 2019

Knowledge.

Trust. Networks.

The question? Building wealth.

The answer? Building connections.

CHATTANOOGA'S WEEKLY ALTERNATIVE • WWW.CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

2 • THE PULSE • JULY 25, 2019 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

INSIDE THIS ISSUE VOLUME 16, ISSUE 30 • JULY 25, 2019 BREWER MEDIA GROUP Publisher James Brewer, Sr. FOUNDED 2003 BY ZACHARY COOPER & MICHAEL KULL

EDITORIAL Managing Editor Gary Poole gary@chattanoogapulse.com Assistant Editor Jenn Webster City Editor Alex Curry Music Editor Marc T. Michael Film Editor John DeVore Contributors David Traver Adolphus • Rob Brezsny Kevin Hale • Matt Jones Ernie Paik • Rick Pimental-Habib Alex Teach • Michael Thomas Editorial Interns Kelsey Fox • Ensley McFarland Cartoonists Jen Sorenson • Tom Tomorrow

ADVERTISING Director of Sales Mike Baskin mike@brewermediagroup.com Account Executives Rick Leavell • Cindee McBride Libby Phillips • Lisa Roche John Rodriguez • Danielle Swindell

CONTACT Offices 1305 Carter St. Chattanooga, TN 37402 Phone 423.265.9494 Email info@chattanoogapulse.com Website chattanoogapulse.com Facebook @chattanoogapulse THE FINE PRINT: The Pulse is published weekly by Brewer Media and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on music, the arts, entertainment, culture and local news. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publisher may take more than one copy per weekly issue.

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Knowledge. Trust. Networks.

“It almost brings me to tears.” I’m talking with Allyson Ford, GRI, real estate agent with Crye-Leike, in a spacious conference space at her office, and she’s not actually crying—she’s smiling.

RENOIR AND GLACKENS

10

UNPRETENTIOUS ART ROCK

20

The Hunter Museum of American Art has brought something truly unique to Chattanooga with their newest exhibit “William J. Glackens and PierreAuguste Renoir: Affinities and Distinctions”.

“You’re like an art rock band, but you’re not pretentious. You guys are fun!” That description of the group Kreamy ‘Lectric Santa is as concise and spot-on a description as one can get.

NOT YOUR REGULAR YOGA

On any given week, you can find hot yoga, power yoga, restorative and flow, each with benefits including increased flexibility, balance, strength, and endurance.

SUMMER CREATURE FEATURE

There isn’t better fodder for a horror film than apex predators. Despite the fact that humanity, the most apex of apex predators, have so dominated the planet.

5 CONSIDER THIS

16 MUSIC CALENDAR

22 ON THE BEAT

9 AIR BAG

19 MUSIC REVIEWS

23 JONESIN' CROSSWORD

21 NEW IN THEATERS

23 FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

12 ARTS CALENDAR

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • JULY 25, 2019 • THE PULSE • 3

CITY LIFE · BETWEEN THE BRIDGES

First Impressions With Renoir And Glackens

Cons ider This w ith Dr. Rick “Don’t blame a clown for acting the clown. Ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.”

Some of the greatest obstacles to becoming who we want to become include the stumbling block of taking things personally; the difficulty we have in caring too much about the opinions others have of us; and worrying that we aren’t enough—not smart enough, attractive enough, funny enough—on and on.

This, my friends, is the ego running amok.

In the book “The Four Agreements”, Don Miguel Ruiz puts it like this: “Nothing others do is because of you.

What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.”

And from “An Awakened Man” by Daniel Nielsen: “When you surrender the struggle and let go of the ego self, you reconnect with your heart and with the divine. In that place love comes alive, a new honesty openly embraced.”

— Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D.

Come savor the nuances of two art masters

By Kelsey Fox

“

Pulse contributor

Like many artists today, the two men were rebels in their field; Impressionism was not being taken well by either the French or American art academies.”

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T

HE HUNTER MUSEUM OF AMERICAN ART HAS brought something truly unique to Chattanooga with their newest exhibit. “William J. Glackens and PierreAuguste Renoir: Affinities and Distinctions” is now on display, featuring more than twenty works by each artist.

The exhibit highlights the stylistic similarities and differences of the two masters, and it does so with a beautiful variety of pieces by each, including landscapes, still lifes, portraits, etchings, and lithographs.

“Affinities and Distinctions” is set up wonderfully for both the art fanatic and the casual patron—each Renoir is placed next to a very similar piece by Glackens and vice versa. But if you want to go into this exhibit and really impress someone with your art knowledge, I’m here to give you the quick run-down on both artists and why this exhibit is definitely a must-see.

Pierre-Auguste Renoir is a wellknown Impressionist painter from

France who lived from 1841 to 1919. William J. Glackens, on the other hand, was an illustrator and artist-reporter in Philadelphia; he lived from 1870 to 1938. Glackens’ lifelong affinity for Renoir began with a trip Glackens took to France to hunt down art pieces for the collection of his good friend Albert C. Barnes.

On display at the Hunter Museum is Glackens’ notebook which shows the prices of varying artworks in France, as well as sketches of places that inspired him. Before leaving France, Glackens actually had Renoir’s exact paint palette ordered from the same paint shop (which is on display in the exhibit) so he could

EDITOONS

start his American take on the Impressionist movement.

Like many artists today, the two men were rebels in their field; Impressionism was not being taken well by either the French or American art academies. Both men paralleled each other by going rogue and funding a small gallery show that (surprisingly to many) went over wonderfully with viewers; the Hunter exhibit is able to perfectly recreate that same feeling of awe in art lovers today.

So how do you spot the differences between artists (without cheating and looking at the placard) and seem like you really know what you’re talking about? The exhibit takes you on a journey, with the earliest works of each to the left, and you can notice that Renoir clings to much more intense brush strokes than Glackens, as well as creating less forced perspective than the latter.

Once you get to the right side of the exhibit you will be faced with Renoir’s later works, which have a heavier fo-

cus on rounder shapes, whereas Glackens stuck to sturdy figures whenever doing portraiture.

The art pieces first debuted together in the NSU Art Museum in Fort Lauderdale last October, but before the exhibit opened the museum called the curator of the Hunter and asked if they could borrow a Glackens piece on display in Chattanooga.

The curator for the Hunter responded simply and said, “Well sure, but where else is this exhibit going?” and so began talks of the exhibit visiting Chattanooga for three months. In fact, this is the last stop before all the pieces go back to their respective collections.

Luckily, “Affinities and Distinctions” is sticking around Chattanooga for a bit longer and can be seen until September 22nd. Tickets are $20, which includes admission to the exhibit and the rest of the museum.

Come and see “Affinities and Distinctions” and create your own impression about these Impressionists.

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • JULY 25, 2019 • THE PULSE • 5

COVER STORY

Knowledge. Trust. Networks.

The question? Building wealth. The answer? Building connections.

By Jenn Webster Pulse Assistant Editor

“

Chattanooga is the Gig City; our median income is growing; but our income disparity is growing, too. About 20 percent of us live in poverty.”

“I

T ALMOST BRINGS ME TO TEARS.” I’M TALKING WITH Allyson Ford, GRI, real estate agent with Crye-Leike, in a spacious conference space at her office, and she’s not actually crying—she’s smiling.

“I had a liberal arts background, psychology, arts, music,” she continues. “My first exposure to finances and finance management and wealth building and home buying was real estate school...I learned how property and property investment works. I didn’t have family to teach me that.”

I’m in the same boat. As I explored concepts like money, income, property, and wealth, I found that these are all different and that, in fact, I lacked basic understanding of the terminology.

Over the last decades I’ve evolved from “OMG, which bill has to slide this month” to “I have two months’ rent saved in the bank” and while that, to me,

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feels wealthy, it’s also precarious. It’s a “haven’t died yet so I must be okay” mentality based on privileges that include race, an old-money speaking voice, and the ability to churn out copy very fast— and a lot of magical thinking. Like a lot of gig workers, I’m one hospitalization away from homelessness, yet I tend to imagine I’m a member of the empowered intelligentsia.

At the same time, for a Chattanoogan I really am remarkably privileged. This cheek-to-cheek dance of privilege and precariousness is not a good thing. It allows us to tell ourselves falsehoods; it underwrites perverse alliances while masking the need for real, solid social

connection—networks, in other words.

For those with the most precarious income and housing, I found out, networks are missing; yet, they’re key to stability.

Chattanooga is the Gig City; our median income is growing; but our income disparity is growing, too. About 20 percent of us live in poverty. Disparities fall across multiple, related vectors—neighborhoods are astoundingly segregated by income level. Census tract 120 (Lookout Mountain) has an average income of $124,028, according to Census data, while a stone’s throw down the hill, Census tract 19 (Alton Park) has a median income of less than a sixth of that, at $19,293.

Race and gender also impact wealth and poverty—though Black people only account for a third of our population, they make up more than 45 percent of Chattanoogans in poverty.

Race and neighborhood patterns aren’t accidental; they represent a shunting of populations around as some neighborhoods become more “desirable” and developments price existing communities out of their homes, leading to further community breakdown and exacerbated inequality. (Chattanooga Organized for Action has a collection of resources on neighborhood migration and housing.)

Moving from the city to the family level, The Times Free Press’s masterful “The Poverty Puzzle” series describes the struggles facing individual families as they strive—and often fail—to climb out of poverty. If anything, the

article argues, growing up poor in Chattanooga is a predictor of living in even deeper poverty as an adult. Similarly, passing barriers from lowmiddle to middle income becomes more difficult; the poles (wealth and poverty) are becoming, metaphorically speaking, “stickier”, while the middle is dwindling.

When asked to look at this puzzle through the lens of what the individual Chattanoogan can do to build wealth, or at the very least to escape the “next emergency” cycle familiar to poor and lower-middle class people, at first I felt like I was looking at an elephant through a magnifying glass. This is backwards! We’re talking systemic inequality! This is applying bootstrap logic to issues way too big for bootstrapping!

But as I talked to experts, I found that yeah, understanding wealth—or failing to understand it, in my case—is pretty important. And we develop that understanding through networks.

BANKING—YES, YOU NEED TO. NO, IT’S NOT SCARY. “How long ago was that [since you were afraid of banks]?” Dionne R. Jenkins, vice president of diversity and inclusion at Tennessee Valley Federal Credit Union, asks me.

I feel like I’m visiting a therapist. Less than two decades, I admit. Like a lot of people, I saw banks as black holes into which money fell and might not—what with fees and charges—ever come out again. I kicked and complained the first time a job made me set up direct deposit.

“

For people without experience having money—people without basic financial literacy—changing mindsets is difficult.”

“We still hear that today!” Jenkins says warmly. “But anybody can open an account with a credit union; we offer multiple accounts with no fees at all.”

For people without experience having money—people without basic financial literacy—“changing mindsets is difficult,” Jenkins says. “We’ll send wealth advisors out to talk to people with no money.”

People need answers to basic questions such as, “How do you start saving to gain wealth? How do you start saving to gain access to money?” Jenkins says. “We take experts in our organization to break it down to show steps to how you get there.

“We meet people where they are— we take the scary factor out of it, humanize it, here’s where I think you are, here’s how you can take the steps to get there. Once you see them as an individual and talk with them about how they can do it, it breaks down the

unknown.”

There are two sides to this conversation. On one hand, people who are unbanked benefit from regularizing their finances, even if it may seem scary.

On the other hand, institutions need to look at everyone, whether fast-food employees or gig workers, as potential partners, treating them with trust and respect. That, says Jessica McCosh, APR, marking specialist with TVFCU, is where organizations like TVFCU come in.

“When you go into our branches, financial services consultants are there to help members and guide them,” she says. “We are very intentional about building trust with our member base.”

For a simple illustration, Jenkins says, members and tellers generally look at computer screens together, rather than only the teller seeing the member’s information on the screen. TVFCU also works intentionally around areas of diversity and inclusion, she says, which

again manifests in how people are treated. Employees work to unlearn unconscious biases that may affect financial outcomes for clients. These include race bias as well as bias against non-English speakers and gender minorities.

Of course, Jenkins and McCosh add that credit unions are the best places to keep your money secure—no credit checks to become a member, dividends paid on even small accounts, no minimum opening deposit.

“We go into schools and talk about financial literacy and why it’s important to start saving,” Jenkins says. “The thought is, you are saving at home in a piggy bank, but move it to a credit union and you can earn dividends on your money as well.”

HOME OWNERSHIP, NOT JUST FOR THE HOUSE Back to Allyson Ford, the real estate agent. She sees her job not as making individual sales, but helping people “move forward in life and finances with home ownership.”

Home ownership, she continues, is empowering. New home owners “feel better about themselves; there is confidence, they have a sense of being in the community, more rooted…a sense of accomplishment.”

And indeed, home ownership can underlie a larger stability in life.

Still, how do you get there? Ford explains that realtors will work with young people, those with minimal savings, even those going through job loss or divorce. Mortgage companies can find options for people without money for a

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • JULY 25, 2019 • THE PULSE • 7

COVER STORY down payment—the Veteran’s Administration, Chattanooga Neighborhood Enterprise, the Federal Housing Administration, and other organizations can all provide down payment assistance, Ford says.

Whether or not you are moving into a home soon, Ford adds, it makes sense to build a relationship with a realtor early. Similarly, Jenkins says, ongoing conversations with lenders such as TVFCU can empower people with knowledge about home ownership.

“We send representatives with our real estate department to teach seminars for Chattanooga Neighborhood Enterprise’s home ownership program,” she says. “We make sure our real estate department talks with firsttime home buyers. [We help prepare you] not just to get it, but how to get financially sound once you are there.

We help you understand what comes after it. You want to be able to furnish it, feel safe, pay bills, have coverage if your A/C breaks, all of that.”

SPECIAL CASES—GIG AND POSTPRISON ECONOMIES Some workers may feel permanently excluded from stability in their work and homes. Gig workers, whether day laborers or freelancers, are some. Others are people with a history of felony convictions.

Timothy Mott, felony community corrections program manager with Hamilton County Corrections Department, works with people from teens to senior citizens with felony convictions. He says it can be difficult for people with convictions to obtain housing and employment. Many grant-funded housing programs, he says, reject applicants with felonies, as do traditional property management companies.

“Probably one of the biggest dif-

“

Networking is important for everyone who seeks stable finances and living situation, but who doesn’t have the traditional fallbacks of family support or regular employment.” ficulties we have now is housing,” he says. “I have a client who has been on our program nine months. She makes good money and is able to move out on her own but [the difficulty is] getting an apartment; she has been turned down 17 different times.”

Similarly, employers may discriminate against people who admit to felony convictions on employment; the alternative, to lie, can have even worse consequences.

Just as Dionne Jenkins made me aware that there are two sides to starting a bank or credit union relationship—the potential client ready to learn about finances and the employee empowered and willing to see the client as an individual—Mott tells me he appreciates landlords who are willing to give potential tenants a chance.

“Most independent landlords are

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more open and receptive,” he says, “but it’s difficult to get a list of them.”

In the meantime, Mott advises people to call ahead and ask about rental qualifications rather than wasting fees—sometimes as much as $45—on futile applications.

Employment, surprisingly, is rising for people with felony convictions, Mott tells me, though it can still be difficult to get a job.

“Unemployment in Hamilton County is the lowest in the state,” he says. “In a normal economy where competition is more tense, [people with felonies] tend to face a lot of rejection; even now they still face some rejection; but a lot of employers will hire ex-felons if the crime is several years old. We are able to place people who have been in jail for murder through numerous drug charges.”

A disciplined pattern of networking—with employers and with offenders who come back and report on who is hiring—makes up an important part of Mott’s work. He puts together other resources, such as affordable counseling and social services, for clients who can benefit.

While he can’t proselytize at work, he doesn’t mind letting people know that a strong connection with a church, mosque, or other religious organization can help build stability. And, like Jenkins, he tells his staff members to really notice clients as individuals, maintaining professional distance but making specific, positive comments with every visit.

Mott encourages employers, especially small business owners with the power of making decisions at a local level, to give applicants with a felony a chance.

“Give them an opportunity,” he says, “and don’t feel guilty or bad about watching over them until they prove themselves. Most are happy to have a job and understand that.”

Networking—creating a team, as Allyson Ford puts it—is important for everyone who seeks stable finances and living situation, but who doesn’t have the traditional fallbacks of family support or regular employment.

“As a person deeply rooted in Chattanooga’s arts community, I understand the needs of people who have chosen a freelance income,” Ford says.

“For every buyer, there is no expense in sitting down and talking to a real estate agent.” Even if you don’t purchase now, that person may become a team player you can draw on in the future.

As Ford says, “Who do you work with, who do you talk to, who do you build relationships with so you can move forward?”

COLUMN · AIRBAG

Cool Tips For Your Hot Wheels Helping your car beat the heat this long hot summer

I David Traver Adolphus Pulse columnist

“

Your car needs heat in moderation to operate, but these 80- and 90-degree days are not its friend, although you do get your best gas mileage now.”

F YOU HAVEN’T HEARD, JUNE WAS the hottest month. Period. For the Planet Earth, since we started keeping track 140 years ago. Don’t believe me?

Greenland has been having wildfires.

Greenland.

Not only do you have to have plants in the first place to have wildfires, but then those plants have to dry out and get hot, can catch on fire, and keep burning.

That’s true throughout the Arctic, which is, in general, on fire.

And July? July will be hotter. In fact, the last cooler than average month was during the Reagan Administration.

This has been particularly relevant to me, personally, as the AC in my car has decided that it will no longer C the A when the outside temperature gets over about 85. Which, as many of you will recognize, is pretty much exactly when you want it to work the most. It does cool for a couple of minutes, just long enough to get my hopes up, and then abruptly starts giving me lovely warm, humid air.

Your car needs heat in moderation to operate, but these 80- and 90-degree days are not its friend, although you do get your best gas mileage now. That’s about the only fluid that’s happy with these temperatures. So here are some things you can and should do during the hottest months to get you both through.

CHECK YOUR TIRES

David Traver Adolphus is a freelance automotive researcher who quit his full time job writing about old cars to pursue his lifelong dream of writing about old AND new cars. Follow him on Twitter as @proscriptus.

Things expand when they get hot, right? That’s true for the air in your tires, which get even hotter from friction than the 140-degree pavement they’re rolling on. Most blowouts happen on the

hottest days, so think about how much you want to be changing a tire on the side of Highway 153 at noon. Heating and cooling can cause your tire pressure to get low, so pump them up and don’t be the jerk driving around on them with no tread left.

TOP OFF ALL YOUR FLUIDS All fluids can boil, and when it happens to your brake fluid, you have no brakes. Ask any trucker making the trip down from Asheville. In addition to your coolant and engine oil, you have power steering fluid and transmission or clutch fluid. The inconvenience or danger of those failing varies, but they’re all pretty much avoidable.

DON’T IDLE Modern cars are amazingly good at being able to idle in hot weather, so

unless you’re driving a 1962 Plymouth Valiant (or my stupid ‘73 Chevy C/K), you’re not likely to vapor lock or boil over. But it’s also really bad for your car, and the environment.

If you’re idling in hot weather you’re probably running the AC, so your car is working hard which means it’s burning more gas. Cars depend on the flow of air through the radiator to cool the engine, and all that increasingly hot exhaust has no air to take it away from the underside of the car and shortly thereafter, your feet.

One of the skills of adulthood is thinking about the consequences of our actions. Not just the obvious or convenient ones, but all of them.

Understanding and thinking about what’s going on with your hot car is a recipe for avoiding a whole lot of problems.

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • JULY 25, 2019 • THE PULSE • 9

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Downward Dog, Cute Kitten, Giggling Goat Goats and kittens give yoga a delightful twist

ARTbeat Takes To The Streets A new event has sprung up in East Ridge this summer: a gallery show with live music called ARTbeat that will be happening every fourth Saturday until September.

The first event was received warmly, with about 200 people in attendance, and East Ridge Creative Arts who created the event are convinced the next three will be just as great.

The main focus of the event is to keep everything local, so it is only fitting that ARTbeat takes place at a coffee shop called Local Coffee of East Ridge that is known already for being a cozy place to stop in to try incredible coffee.

The event held there will include paintings and pottery done by local artists and, even better, all the pieces displayed will be available for purchase.

ARTbeat is sure to keep summer cool this year with a myriad of local talent. The free event runs from 5 to 9 p.m. with music starting at 6 p.m. at Local Coffee of East Ridge at 5330 Ringgold Rd. For more information about the venue or ARTbeat, call (423) 498-6060, and make sure to stop by this Saturday night for your monthly fix of local art. — Kelsey Fox

Y

OGA IS NOTHING NEW IN THE TENNESSEE VALley. Different studios and yoga classes have popped up all over town for years. On any given week, you can find hot yoga, power yoga, restorative and flow, each with benefits including increased flexibility, balance, strength, and endurance.

By Kevin Hale Pulse contributor

But in the last couple years, incorporating animals in the practice has become popular around the country. Goat yoga and now kitten yoga have found homes in Chattanooga, each practice with the health benefits of the ancient exercise, but go-

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ing beyond what’s expected by supporting some great causes.

You may have heard of goat yoga by now, but you couldn’t find it in the area until a year ago. Becca Caney started Goat Yoga Chattanooga, the first of its kind in town.

“Chattanooga is animal savvy but they did not have any kind of goat yoga,” she says. “We had a Face-

book event last summer that sold out.”

About 30 people signed up for the event, with proceeds going to the new Chattanooga Preparatory School for boys.

“We worked out the kinks with the first event and were able to offer to students at the University of Tennessee at Chattanooga last fall,” she says.

The UTC event was such a success that 1,000 students signed up for the classes.

“We found that millennials not having been around farms enjoyed the element of having goats jump on you,” she laughs. “We also saw

some mental health benefits where some students would hold the goats and cry. It’s a full sensory experience.”

Caney follows a business model she picked up in her hometown of Dallas.

“It’s very urbanized there,” she observes. “They come to you instead of you coming to the goats.”

Caney was unable to get her property rezoned for goats but found several studios and open spaces eager to welcome the herd. She started with two goats but now has six.

The goats are kept about 10 miles outside the city, at a facility that also boards sheep, donkeys, and other animals.

“Kids actually play with the goats,” she says. “You have to keep them socialized. They will normally run away from people but once you get them socialized they realize you are going to feed them.”

The goal is for Goat Yoga Chattanooga to have their own facility, like a barn, close to the city.

“We had to cancel our last four events since it’s been so hot and rainy lately,” she says. “It’s not conducive because the goats will cry if conditions are not good.”

Indoors you’ll need more crew for cleanup. And now might be a good time to provide a disclaimer.

“The goats are not potty trained,” she laughs. “No one ever complains

“

Research indicates interaction with animals lowers blood pressure and can temporarily affect the release of various neurotransmitters in the brain. ” even though it happens at least once a class. Most people know what they are getting into.”

Potty problems aside, goat yoga can be funny and more entertaining.

You’ve got people taking pictures and petting the animals.

Research indicates interaction with animals lowers blood pressure and can temporarily affect the release of various neurotransmitters in the brain.

Oxytocin levels (linked with bonding) and dopamine levels (involved in the reward-motivation system) are increased, while cortisol levels (an immunosuppressant associated with stress) are decreased.

Kitty Yoga is probably not as messy as goat yoga but its mission differs slightly.

“We started last summer and twice a month, and it sold out immediately,” says Taylor Hixson, development director with the Humane Educational Society.

Hixson says it’s been a great success and even remembers one special adoption story.

“There was a girl visiting from Florida who took the class,” she says. “She actually went back home but stayed in touch and ended up driving back up there to adopt.”

Barley Chattanooga hosts the onehour yoga classes. If yoga is not your thing, you can still hang out and tell the bartender you’re there for the Humane Society.

“People come to spend time with the kittens, have a beer and end up falling in love,” says Hixson. “There are all levels of yoga and kittens. Some are cuddlier and some are more wild.

It depends on the personality of the cat.”

Summer is kitten season and cats are procreating. The Humane Society has more than 500 available for adoption now.

“This whole kitten yoga is a fun way to raise awareness,” says Hixson. “Probably tickles while kittens are climbing on you, so you’re going to laugh. Purring is good—you’re [building] your health so it’s a sneaky way to get them adopted.”

THU7.25

FRI7.26

SAT7.27

Christmas in July

Little Shop of Horrors

Movies in the Park

Break out your ugly sweaters and come out to beat the holiday rush before the weather gets cold.

4 p.m.

Oddstory Brewing Company 336 E. MLK Blvd. oddstorybrewing.co

What happens when an alien carnivorous plant lands on Earth? Why, a great musical comedy breaks out, of course.

8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. theatrecentre.com

Gather your friends and family and come downtown for a free screening of Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse.

9 p.m.

Coolidge Park 150 River St. (423) 643-6311 CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • JULY 25, 2019 • THE PULSE • 11

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT CALENDAR THURSDAY7.25 TACP 5K Torch Run 7 a.m.

Tennessee River Park 4301 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 842-0177 parks.hamiltontn.gov Sensational Sharks 9:30 a.m.

Tennessee Aquarium 1 Broad St. (423) 265-0695 tnaqua.org Urban Farmers Market and Marketplace 3 p.m.

Miller Park 910 Market St. millerparkmarket.com Christmas in July 4 p.m.

Oddstory Brewing Company 336 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 682-7690 oddstorybrewing.co Naughty Knights Chess Meetup 5 p.m.

Hutton & Smith Brewing Co. 431 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 760-3600 huttonandsmithbrewing.com Wander Over to The Westin 5:30 p.m.

The Westin Chattanooga 801 Pine St. (423) 531-4653 marriott.com Alley Hour 5:30 p.m.

Cooper’s Alley 10 E. 7th St. Adulting Summer Camp: A Shot At Love 6 p.m.

The Chattery 302 W. 6th St. (423) 521-2643 thechattery.org Annual Shrimp Boil 6 p.m.

Lookout Mountain Conservancy 3085 Broad St. (423) 424-3882 lookoutmountainconservatory.org Yoga with Cats 6:30 p.m.

Naughty Cat Café 3742 Tennessee Ave. (423) 541-4316

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naughtycatcafe.com Cassandro, The Exotico 7 p.m.

Palace Theater 818 Georgia Ave. (423) 803-6578 chattpalace.com Divas & Drinks 7 p.m.

Virgola Wine Bar 608 Georgia Ave. (423) 771-7773 chattanoogawinebar.com Little Shop of Horrors 7 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com Etta May 7:30 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com Alcoholics Not Anonymous Comedy Open Mic 8 p.m.

Barley Taproom 235 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 682-8200 chattanoogabarley.com Country Line Dancing Class 8 p.m.

Westbound Bar 24 Station St. (423) 498-3069 westboundbar.com

FRIDAY7.26 Sensational Sharks 9:30 a.m.

Tennessee Aquarium 1 Broad St. (423) 265-0695 tnaqua.org Author Signing with KB Ballentine 6 p.m.

Barnes & Noble 2100 Hamilton Place Blvd.

(423) 893-0186 barnesandnoble.com (423) 498-1977 Etta May 7:30, 9:45 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com

Improv “Movie” Night 8 p.m.

Improv Chattanooga 1800 Rossville Ave. (423) 843-1775 improvchattanooga.com “Annie” 8 p.m.

Signal Mountain Playhouse 205-311 Rolling Way smph.org Little Shop of Horrors 8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com Video Game Night 8 p.m.

Stone Cup Cafe 208 Frazier Ave. (423) 521-3977 stonecupcafe.com Ruby Falls Lantern Tours 8:30 p.m.

Ruby Falls 1720 S. Scenic Hwy. (423) 821-2544 rubyfalls.com Good, Old-Fashioned Improv Show 10 p.m.

Improv Chattanooga 1800 Rossville Ave. (423) 843-1775 improvchattanooga.com

SATURDAY7.27 Day of Play 9 a.m.

Heritage Park 1428 Jenkins Rd. (423) 855-9474 Chattanooga River Market 10 a.m.

Tennessee Aquarium Plaza 1 Broad St. publicmarkets.us Pirates, Parrots, & Princesses Day 10 a.m.

Chattanooga Zoo 301 N. Holtzclaw Ave. (423) 697-1322 chattzoo.org Splash Summer Arts Festival 10 a.m.

Miller Park 928 Market St. (423) 265-3700

Beach, Please: Drag Brunch 11 a.m.

The Palace Theater 818 Georgia Ave. (423) 803-6578 chattpalace.com Dogs & Demos 11 a.m.

Woodcraft of Chattanooga 5824 Brainerd Rd. (423) 710-8001 woodcraft.com Feed the Endangered Red Wolves 11:45 a.m.

Reflection Riding Arboretum & Nature Center 400 Garden Rd. (423) 821-1160 reflectionriding.org 18th Annual Honey Harvest Noon Creative Discovery Museum 321 Chestnut St. (423) 756-2738 cdmfun.org The Bobby Stone Film Series presents: Pulp Fiction 3 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre 709 Broad St. (423) 757-5580 tivolichattanooga.com Cassandro, The Exotico 4 p.m.

Palace Theater 818 Georgia Ave. (423) 803-6578 chattpalace.com ARTbeat 5 p.m.

Local Coffee of East Ridge 5330 Ringgold Rd. (423) 498-6060 facebook.com/ERCreativeArts Salsa Night 6:30 p.m.

Mayan Kitchen 507 Broad St. (423) 682-7835 mayankitchen.com Stringer’s Ridge Contra Dance 7:30 p.m.

Lundy Hall 4315 Brainerd Rd. contranooga.com Etta May 7:30, 9:45 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com

“Annie” 8 p.m.

Signal Mountain Playhouse 205-311 Rolling Way smph.org Little Shop of Horrors 8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com Your Stories 8 p.m.

Improv Chattanooga 1800 Rossville Ave. (423) 843-1775 improvchattanooga.com Movies in the Park: SpiderMan Into the Spider-Verse 9 p.m.

Coolidge Park 150 River St. (423) 643-6311 Whose Line Chattanooga 10 p.m.

Improv Chattanooga 1800 Rossville Ave. (423) 843-1775 improvchattanooga.com

SUNDAY7.28 18th Annual Honey Harvest Noon Creative Discovery Museum 321 Chestnut St. (423) 756-2738 Chattanooga Market 12:30 p.m.

The Chattanooga Market 1829 Carter St.

chattanoogamarket.com The Bobby Stone Film Series presents: Amazing Grace 2 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre 709 Broad St. (423) 757-5580 tivolichattanooga.com Little Shop of Horrors 2:30 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com Cassandro, The Exotico 3 p.m.

Palace Theater 818 Georgia Ave. (423) 803-6578 chattpalace.com Hannibal Buress 7 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre 709 Broad St. (423) 757-5580 tivolichattanooga.com Dan Whitehurst 7:30 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com

MONDAY7.29 Summer Belly Dance Session 5:45 p.m.

Movement Arts Collective 3813 Dayton Blvd.

(423) 401-8115 movementartscollective.com

Beginner Macrame: Wall Hanging 6 p.m.

The Chattery at Chattanooga Workspace 302 W. 6th St. (423) 822-5750 chattanoogaworkspace.com Joggers & Lagers 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Brewing Co. 1804 Chestnut St. chattabrew.com

TUESDAY7.30 Wake Up & Run 6 a.m.

Fleet Feet Sports 307 Manufacturers Rd. (423) 771-7996 fleetfeetchattanooga.com Jam Making 101 10:30 a.m.

Pins & Needles Quilt Shop 6503 Hixson Pk. (423) 668-8734 pinsandneedlesquiltshop.com Chess K-night 5 p.m.

Mad Priest Coffee Roasters 1900 Broad St. (423) 393-3834 madpriestcoffee.com Beginner Handlettering 6 p.m.

The Chattery at Chattanooga Workspace 302 W. 6th St. (423) 822-5750 chattanoogaworkspace.com

THE PULSE ENTERTAINMENT SPOTLIGHT Winner of the prestigious American Comedy Awards “Comic of the Year,” this Kentucky woman is a comedy icon! The reigning Queen of Southern Sass delivers a high-powered,takeno-prisoners performance full of truth, irony, humor, and wisdom.

Etta May Thursday-Saturday The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. thecomedycatch.com

Tuesday Night Chess Club 6 p.m.

Downtown Library 1001 Broad St. (423) 643-7700 chattilibrary.com Paths to Pints along the Riverwalk 6:30 p.m.

The Tap House 3800 St. Elmo Ave. taphousechatt.com Open Mic Comedy 7 p.m.

Common General 3800 St. Elmo Ave. (423) 521-0065 Poetry, Pups + Pints 7:30 p.m.

Stone Cup Cafe 208 Frazier Ave. (423) 521-3977 stonecupcafe.com

WEDNESDAY7.31 Main Street Market 4 p.m.

522 W. Main St. mainstfarmersmarket.com CFF Presents: Forbidden Planet 7:30 p.m.

Miller Park 928 Market St. (423) 265-3700 chattfilmfest.org Speaker Series: Bobby Fulcher 7:30 p.m.

Rock/Creek 301 Manufacturer’s Rd. (423) 265-5969 udans.com Naughty Knights Chess Meetup 7:30 p.m.

The Bitter Alibi 825 Houston St. (423) 362-5070 thebitteralibi.com Film Night 8 p.m.

Cooper’s Alley 10 E. 7th St. eatonthehouse.com Map these locations on chattanoogapulse.com. Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@chattanoogapulse.com CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • JULY 25, 2019 • THE PULSE • 13

THE MUSIC SCENE

Unpretentious Art Rock Kreamy 'Lectric Santa is a psychedelic treat

We Definitely Hear Ya Do you love live music, local punk bands, and jamming with strangers who quickly turn into friends? If you answered yes to all or just one of these questions, I have the perfect festival experience for you. Do Ya Hear We? is back for its twelfth year this weekend starting on Friday evening and running until the early hours of Sunday night.

Do Ya Hear We? was started by Bryan Hensley and Scott Balch in 2007 as a way to showcase local bands and persuade some of their favorite punk bands to come back to Chattanooga. This year the festival is featuring 34 bands, 15 of them local.

“This year is particularly exciting to have some bands playing that have not played in quite some time. 50 Million has not played Chattanooga in over 20 years, and ADD/C, though from Chattanooga, have not played in a few years,” explains Tucker from Do Ya Hear We? For only fifteen dollars you can spend your weekend with some of the best punk bands.

Do Ya Hear We? will perform a kid-friendly show on Friday and Saturday at Sluggo’s with the first band going on at 5:40 p.m. and the last one at 12:30 a.m.

On Sunday the event will be 21 and up at JJ’s with the same time slots. Do yourself a favor and don’t miss this opportunity to have a few drinks and dance like no one’s watching. — Ensley McFarland

“Y

OU’RE LIKE AN ART ROCK BAND, BUT you’re not pretentious. You guys are fun!”

That description of the group Kreamy ‘Lectric Santa (KLS) came from Chris Cottie (from the Florida band The Eat), and it’s as concise and spot-on a description as one can get when trying to convey KLS’s sonically challenging, yet playful work.

By Ernie Paik Pulse contributor

When it comes to sheer wild diversity, few bands are in the same league as KLS. Core members Robert Price and Priya Ray answered some questions in advance of their Friday set (which, according to Ray, will be a “psychedelic hoedown”) at Sluggo’s as part of the annual Do Ya Hear We? festival.

Kreamy ‘Lectric Santa began in the early ‘90s in Miami, Florida

14 • THE PULSE • JULY 25, 2019 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

as a “freak collective” that was part of the local punk and noise scene but more rooted in psychedelia, post-punk, and experimental music, according to Price.

“Our aim was to be genreless, and for better or for worse, we have melded forms traditionally unmeldable,” said Price.

Within a year of the group moving to Atlanta, Georgia in 1998, Ray sustained a spinal injury from a fall, which left her a wheelchair rider.

“All of a sudden, we were airlift-

ed from a life that we knew of dysfunctional but wildly creative compounds,” said Price. “The days and nights of partying and losing our shizzitte were now focused on Priya regaining her independence and her recovery.”

“To keep my sanity, I brought myself to the cusp of carpel tunnel [syndrome] playing my acoustic obsessively,” said Price, about this period of uncertainty in the band’s history.

“I started developing a ton of these instrumental musical sketches I called ‘Sickly Sweet’.”

“The idea was to quickly compose these pieces on guitar, violin, and other instruments and toys lying around, thus capturing that initial spark one gets when a person first writes a song,” said Price, about the ongoing project, some of which can be heard on the group’s Bandcamp website.

“We have maybe 100+ tracks. It’s a never-ending obsession.”

Eventually, Price began finding long-

distance collaborators for the “Sickly Sweet” tracks, including artists like Peter Stampfel of the Holy Modal Rounders and Tori Kudo of the Japanese ensemble Maher Shalal Hash Baz. “We’ve utilized several Sickly Sweets on each new release and plan volume one to be released on a label called Crass Lips,” said Price. “Hopefully sometime in this millennium.”

The band’s creative process can take its time, and it’s been more than 10 years since the last full-length album from KLS. “We like to revisit, add, and revisit,” said Ray. “Our music is really more like art.”

“Or a fine stinky cheese,” added Price.

KLS is working on its next proper full-length album, which will be a concept album dealing with “power, greed, consumption, and the end of the world,” according to Price.

“Unfortunately the narrative, as with the times we’re living in, is under constant revision,” said Price. “I’m trying to somehow keep it funny and absurd and not be too preachy about it, but the subject matter is hardly humorous.”

“I also really don’t want to create music that is too specifi-

“

People tell us when they listen to us while driving their cars, they get lost, despite it being a route they’ve driven every day.

That’s the best thing to hear!”

cally tied to one timeframe and becomes dated in a few years,” said Price. “Like 1980’s hardcore about Reagan.”

Another work-in-progress for KLS concerns Ray’s challenges being a DIY artist with a disability.

“When I decided I wanted to continue doing KLS, it also became very evident to me about how little people understood about accessibility and why it is so important to think about it,” said Ray. “These experiences motivated me to start my grassroots group DIYabled to inform people about disability, and I decided I wanted to make a documentary about disability from my perspective.”

“Navigating the DIY world can be improbable and even dangerous at times, but it’s the lifestyle I choose to live,” said Ray. “If anyone is reading this and is interested in working with

us on our documentary, please get in touch!”

Currently, KLS resides in Asheville, North Carolina, and there’s a strong connection between the band and the Chattanooga punk scene, which began with former bassist Andrew Powell’s friendships with punks from Dalton, Georgia in the ‘90s.

“Visiting [Chattanooga] is always like a homecoming,” said Ray. “On a regular basis, people tell us when they listen to us while driving their cars, they get lost, despite it being a route they’ve driven every day. That’s the best thing to hear!” said Ray, when asked about her favorite bit of fan feedback, and when considering the twisty musical career and quarter-century history of Kreamy ‘Lectric Santa, it seems expected to end up in unexpected places.

THU7.25 Kelly Willis and Bruce Robinson This talented duo are out on the road showcasing their latest album "Beautfiful Lie".

7 p.m.

Songbirds North 35 Station St. songbirdsguitars.co

FRI7.26 Matthew Paul Revere & The ExLaws It's a night of local art and great music in the most eclectic gallery in town.

9 p.m.

Frequency Arts 516 Tremont St. facebook.com/frequencyarts

SAT7.27 West End Blend Funk, jazz, soul, hip-hop, rock, latin music, and afrobeat come together in one hgh-energy band that will get you dancing!

7 p.m.

Ross’s Landing 201 Riverfront Pkwy. riverfrontnights.com

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • JULY 25, 2019 • THE PULSE • 15

LIVE MUSIC CALENDAR THURSDAY7.25 Jerry Fordham 6 p.m.

1885 Grill 3914 St. Elmo Ave. 1885grill.com James Crumble Trio 6 p.m.

St. John’s Meeting Place 1278 Market St. stjohnsrestaurant.com Lady Dan, Riley Moore, Tandem Bicycle 6 p.m.

Handup Handle and Bar 1155 E. Main St. handleandbar.com Danimal & Friends 6 p.m.

WanderLinger Brewing Co. 1208 King St. wanderlinger.com Thursday Night Jazz 6 p.m.

The Palms at Hamilton 6925 Shallowford Rd. thepalmsathamilton.com Open Mic Thursday 6 p.m.

Stone Cup Cafe 208 Frazier Ave. stonecupcafe.com Nick Williams 6:30 p.m.

Westin Dorato Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Toby Hewitt 7 p.m.

Backstage Bar 29 Station St. backstagechattanooga.com Jason Lyles 7 p.m.

Charlies BBQ & Bakery 2309 E. Main St. charliesbbq.com Webb Barringer 7 p.m.

Edley’s Bar-B-Que 205 Manufacturers Rd. edleysbbq.com Kelly Willis and Bruce Robinson 7 p.m.

Songbirds North 35 Station St. songbirdsguitars.co Divas and Drinks 7 p.m.

16 • THE PULSE • JULY 25, 2019 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

Virgola Wine Bar 608 Georgia Ave. chattanoogawinebar.com Courtney Holder 7:30 p.m.

Westin Alchemy Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Fox Mountain Express 7:30 p.m.

The FEED Co. Table and Tavern 201 W. Main St. feedtableandtavern.com Jesse Jungkurth & Friends 7:30 p.m.

Mexi-Wing VII 5773 Brainerd Rd. (423) 296-1073 Mark Andrew 8 p.m.

The Social 1110 Market St. publichousechattanooga.com Open Mic Night 9 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com Megan Jean and the KFB 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com Jim Shorts, Tourist Trap, Sammy David 10 p.m.

Sluggo’s Vegetarian Cafe

505 Cherokee Blvd.

(423) 752-5224

FRIDAY7.26 Summer Music Weekends 8:30 a.m.

Rock City Gardens 1400 Patten Rd. seerockcity.com Do Ya Hear We Fest 5 p.m.

Sluggo’s Vegetarian Cafe 505 Cherokee Blvd.

(423) 752-5224 Maria Sable 6:30 p.m.

Westin Dorato Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Roger Alan Wade 7 p.m.

Songbirds North 35 Station St. songbirdsguitars.co Jason Lyles 7 p.m.

Virgola Wine Bar 608 Georgia Ave. chattanoogawinebar.com Edge Petal Burn, Golden Horse Shoe, Reverend Mother, Sofia Caterina, Bad Ties 7 p.m.

The Spot 1800 E. Main St.

LIVE MUSIC SPOTLIGHT

A dynamic performer determined to bring Ragtime and 1920’s style Dixieland jazz to new audiences, Blair Crimmins and his band The Hookers have a sound that is at once modern,

while being deeply rooted in the past.

Blair Crimmins & the Hookers Friday, 8 p.m.

Miller Plaza 850 Market St. nightfallchattanooga.com

spotvenue.co Tim Lewis 7 p.m.

El Meson 248 Northgate Park elmesonchattanooga.com The Red Rogues 7:30 p.m.

Gate 11 Distillery 1400 Market St. gate11distillery.com Amber Fults 7:30 p.m.

Westin Alchemy Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Toby Hewitt 7:30 p.m.

Puckett’s Restaurant 2 W. Aquarium Way puckettsgro.com Blair Crimmins & the Hookers 8 p.m.

Miller Plaza 850 Market St. nightfallchattanooga.com Robin Baker 8 p.m.

WanderLinger Brewing Company 1208 King St. wanderlinger.com Jordan Hallquist 9 p.m.

The FEED Co. Table & Tavern 201 W. Main St. feedtableandtavern.com Matthew Paul Revere & The ExLaws 9 p.m.

Frequency Arts 516 Tremont St. facebook.com/frequencyarts Maria Jordania 9 p.m.

Songbirds South 41 Station St. songbirdsguitars.co Jake LaBotz 9 p.m.

Tremont Tavern 1203 Hixson Pike tremonttavern.com Randall Adams 9 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com Sexy Beast 9 p.m.

HiFi Clyde’s 122 W. Main St.

hificlydeschattanooga.com Doktor, Section 8, Dado, Soundsystem Dub Collection 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com Gino Fanelli 10 p.m.

The Social 1110 Market St. publichousechattanooga.com Aunt Betty 10 p.m.

Bud’s Sports Bar 5751 Brainerd Rd. budssportsbar.com

SATURDAY7.27 Summer Music Weekends 8:30 a.m.

Rock City Gardens 1400 Patten Rd. seerockcity.com Julie Gribble 12:30 p.m.

Tennessee Aquarium Plaza 1 Broad St. publicmarkets.us Do Ya Hear We Fest 5 p.m.

Sluggo’s Vegetarian Cafe 505 Cherokee Blvd.

(423) 752-5224 Lewis & Clark 6 p.m.

American Draft 34 Choo Choo Ave. choochoo.com/american-draft Melange 6 p.m.

The Palms at Hamilton 6925 Shallowford Rd. thepalmsathamilton.com Tre Powell 6:30 p.m.

Westin Dorato Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Mark Andrew 7 p.m.

Gate 11 Distillery 1400 Market St. gate11distillery.com Christy Snow 7 p.m.

Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse 105 McBrien Rd. christunity.org The Other Brothers

7 p.m.

Edley’s Bar-B-Que 205 Manufacturers Rd. edleysbbq.com The Raghu Dixit Project 7 p.m.

Mad Priest Coffee Roasters 1900 Broad St. (423) 393-3834 madpriestcoffee.com Jubal 7 p.m.

Oddstory Brewing Company 336 E. MLK Blvd. oddstorybrewing.co Playin’ Possum Blues Band 7 p.m.

Hutton & Smith Brewing Co. 431 E. MLK Blvd. huttonandsmithbrewing.com Intimate Chronicles 7 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Angel Snow 7 p.m.

Songbirds North 35 Station St. songbirdsguitars.co West End Blend 7 p.m.

Ross’s Landing 201 Riverfront Pkwy. riverfrontnights.com Forever Bluegrass 7 p.m.

Westbound Bar 24 Station St. westboundbar.com Preston Ruffing 7:30 p.m.

Westin Alchemy Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Puckett’s Hitmaker Series with Barrett Baber 7:30 p.m.

Puckett’s Restaurant 2 W. Aquarium Way puckettsgro.com Makeshift 8 p.m.

Barley Taproom 235 E. MLK Blvd. chattanoogabarley.com Cheering Tokyo 8 p.m.

River Drifters 1925 Suck Creek Rd. riverdrifterschatt.com Neon Moon

9 p.m.

Songbirds South 41 Station St. songbirdsguitars.co Travis Kilgore 9 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com Rock Daddy 9 p.m.

HiFi Clyde’s 122 W. Main St. hificlydeschattanooga.com Genki Genki Panic, Buzzards of Fuzz, SLZSLZ 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com Rick Rushing & The Blues Strangers 9 p.m.

WanderLinger Brewing Company 1208 King St. wanderlinger.com Hugh Allen 9 p.m.

Trish’s Sports Bar 4762 Highway 58 (423) 269-8400 Aunt Betty 10 p.m.

Bud’s Sports Bar 5751 Brainerd Rd. budssportsbar.com

SUNDAY7.28 Summer Music Weekends 8:30 a.m.

Rock City Gardens 1400 Patten Rd. seerockcity.com Guitar Chattanooga 11 a.m.

The Chattanooga Market 1829 Carter St. chattanoogamarket.com The Bear and The Bird 11 a.m.

Flying Squirrel Bar 55 Johnson St. flyingsquirrelbar.com Mark Andrew 11 a.m.

The Edwin Hotel 102 Walnut St. theedwinhotel.com Carl Pemberton

11 a.m.

Westin Chattanooga 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Amber Fults Noon 1885 Grill 3914 St. Elmo Ave. 1885grill.com Danimal and Friends 12:30 p.m.

The Feed Co. Table & Tavern 201 W. Main St. feedtableandtavern.com The Wamps 1:30 p.m.

Flying Squirrel Bar 55 Johnson St. flyingsquirrelbar.com The Other Brothers 2 p.m.

WanderLinger Brewing Co. 1208 King St. wanderlinger.com Bluegrass Jam 4 p.m.

Fiddlers Anonymous 2248 Dayton Blvd.

(423) 994-7497 Open Mic with Jeff Daniels 6 p.m.

Long Haul Saloon 2536 Cummings Hwy. (423) 822-9775 The Molly Maguires 7 p.m.

The Honest Pint 35 Patten Pkwy. thehonestpint.com Do Ya Hear We Fest 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com

MONDAY7.29 Open Air with Jessica Nunn 6 p.m.

The Granfalloon 400 E. Main St. granfalloonchattanooga.com Monday Nite Big Band 7 p.m.

The Coconut Room 6925 Shallowford Rd. thepalmsathamilton.com Blues Night Open Jam 7 p.m.

Songbirds North 35 Station St. CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • JULY 25, 2019 • THE PULSE • 17

LIVE MUSIC CALENDAR songbirdsguitars.co Open Mic Night 7 p.m.

Fiddler’s Anonymous 2248 Dayton Blvd.

(423) 994-7497 Very Open Mic with Shawnessey Cargile 8 p.m.

The Well 1800 Rossville Blvd. #8 wellonthesouthside.com Cloak, Pale Rider, Mudsex 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com

TUESDAY7.30 Webb Barringer 6 p.m.

1885 Grill 3914 St. Elmo Ave. 1885grill.com Acoustic Bohemian Night 6:30 p.m.

Mexi-Wing 9 6925 Shallowford Rd. (423) 468-3366 Maya Trippe & Kyle Littleton 7 p.m.

Charlies BBQ & Bakery 2309 E. Main St. charliesbbq.com Danimal 7 p.m.

Backstage Bar 29 Station St. backstagechattanooga.com Space Jam Open Mic with Xll Olympians 7 p.m.

Barley Taproom 235 E. MLK Blvd. chattanoogabarley.com Mark Andrew 7:30 p.m.

Westin Alchemy Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Paperback 8 p.m.

The Spot 1800 E. Main St. (423) 803-5744 spotvenue.co Live Jam with Freddy Mc & Friends 8 p.m.

Granfalloon 400 E. Main St. granfalloonchattanooga.com Open Mic with Mike McDade

18 • THE PULSE • JULY 25, 2019 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

8 p.m.

Tremont Tavern 1203 Hixson Pike tremonttavern.com

WEDNESDAY7.31 Matt Downer 6 p.m.

1885 Grill 3914 St. Elmo Ave. 1885grill.com Amber Fults 6:30 p.m.

Westin Dorato Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Jesse James Jungkurth 7 p.m.

Backstage Bar 29 Station St. backstagechattanooga.com Webb Barringer 7 p.m.

BrewHaus 224 Frazier Ave. brewhausbar.com Cody James Harris 7 p.m.

Charlies BBQ & Bakery 2309 E. Main St. charliesbbq.com Papa Sway 7 p.m.

River Drifters 1925 Suck Creek Rd. riverdrifterschatt.com Preston Ruffing 7:30 p.m.

Westin Alchemy Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Randall Adams 8 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com Priscilla & Little Rickee 8 p.m.

Las Margaritas 1101 Hixson Pike (423) 756-3332 Outlaw 45 9 p.m.

The Palms at Hamilton 6925 Shallowford Rd. thepalmsathamilton.com Map these locations on chattanoogapulse. com. Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@chattanoogapulse.com

MARC T. MICHAEL’S RECORD REVIEWS

New Music From Neko Case, The Hu

Neko Case Hell-On (Anti-)

The Hu The Gereg (Eleven Seven)

Hell-On is the first solo release from Neko Case in five years. Case, whose ability as a singer/songwriter has been critically acclaimed since her debut, fully assumes the mantle of producer with this latest offering.

It’s a welcome move, influenced to no small degree by her collaboration with k.d.

Lang and Laura Veirs on a 2016 project that culminated in Case’s inclusion on a panel at “Woman Producer” summit later that same year.

It’s common for artists to gravitate towards greater control of their work over the course of a career, but desire and talent are two different things and for every blossoming creative genius, there are a dozen skilled performers who

probably should have stayed on the other side of the recording desk. Case, unsurprisingly, belongs to the former category, a creative genius whose full potential is only now being realized as she asserts full control over her work.

“Last Lion of Albion” is, so far, the most recognizable track on the album, and the most heavily promoted with an accompanying video that hearkens back to the day when videos were as much art as the music they were produced for.

Case’s new-found freedom is on full display in a seemingly sing-song tune whose darker nature is conveyed by a handful of accidentals and single minor chord. Case’s protest song against colonialism delivers its gut punch with the line,

“And you’ll feel extinction when you see your face on their money.”

Like any brilliant songwriter, Case never shies away from injecting the universal truths discovered in her own experience. Songs like “My Uncle’s Navy” recount the psychological stains left by a brutish “Uncle” whose casual cruelty towards animals and domineering nature inspired horror in the children even as it provoked amusement in the man himself and, more importantly, in the other adults who failed to consider how it all appears to the eyes of an innocent.

Case echoes a familiar theme prevalent in the work of Stephen King, namely that adults are too often blithely unaware of the damage they do to the very young not through the recognizable traumas of physical abuse or molestation, but from the less obvious impact of thoughtlessness and casual indifference.

Hell-On is the most powerful and sophisticated release yet from an artist who has never failed to create music that is honest, personally resonant, and sonically gorgeous.

Scheduled for release in September, The Gereg is the de-

but album from self-described “Mongolian Heavy Metal” group, The Hu. The two tracks released to YouTube in late 2018, along with a third released earlier this year, have been gaining significant traction on social media in the last few months especially.

Featuring traditional Mongolian instruments and, most fascinatingly, Tuvan throat singing, the group combines eastern steppe folk music with what is undeniably an aggressive “heavy metal” sound. The result so far is a number one position in April on Billboard’s Hard Rock Digital Song Sales chart.

Whether the band’s future is tragedy or triumph depends on the distinction between novel and novelty. Novelty, when applied to the music industry, is a disparaging term, a catch-all for unique acts who, having struck gold once, generally fail to do so again.

Novel, on the other hand, simply refers to what is new or fresh. The difference between being one or the other depends on staying power.

There is no question that The Hu is novel. Prior to the appearance of the group, throat-singing, in this hemisphere, was relegated to PBS

documentaries and the occasional pop-culture reference (The Simpsons did it!) In the span of six or seven months, this “novel” act has introduced a millennia-old tradition to a Western world whose mainstream popular music tradition goes back a century and some change.

Whether the novel becomes novelty is an unanswered question so far, but the impact of “Wolf Totem”, “Yuve Yuve Yu”, and “Shoog Shoog” is undeniable and while The Gereg may not wind up on many “Albums to Take to a Desert Island” lists five years from now, the exposure to a tradition from the same culture that produced Genghis and Kublai Khan will likely be remembered by many for a long time to come.

As martially stirring as any Scottish Great Pipe ensemble, the music of The Hu is essential listening to anyone craving a broader palate than the often tepid offerings of pop music.

The meteoric rise of the band (they have been touring constantly since their debut) and the burgeoning popularity of their sound may or may not be short-lived, but for the moment it seems that the Mongolians are once again poised to take over the world.

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FILM & TELEVISION

Summer Creature Feature Crawl is a bloody fine gator-fest

The Slits Were Here To Be Heard Sunday Slashers and the Palace Theater, along with the Do Ya Hear We? Chattanooga Punk Fest are proud to present Hear To Be Heard: The Story of the Slits, this Sunday at 2 p.m. at The Palace Theater on Georgia Ave. The all-female punk band The Slits formed in London in 1976 and produced some of the most influential and innovative music of the punk movement.

Contemporaries of The Clash and The Sex Pistols, they were the pioneering godmothers of the musical movement known as “Punky Reggae”.

The film tells the story of the band and the lives of the women involved, from the band’s inception in 1976 to its end in 2010, coinciding at the death of lead vocalist Ari Up. When Ari passed away she was working with tour manager and friend Jennifer Shagawat on a film about the band.

After Ari’s death, with the film not completed, Jennifer contacted her longtime friend Bill over at film production company Molasses Manifesto to come on and help finish the project.

Interviews and footage present a portrait of this revolutionary band from their formation to their end, a must see for fans of punk rock, women who rock, and anyone who enjoys no-holds-barred rock and roll.

Doors open at 1 p.m., and the tickets are just $5, with merchandise and records from the Do Ya Hear We? fest available in the lobby. — Michael Thomas

By John DeVore Pulse Film Editor

“

If you can think of an animal, it’s probably got its own horror film. The more domestic the animal, the goofier the film.”

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T

HERE ISN’T BETTER FODDER FOR A HORROR FILM than apex predators. Despite the fact that humanity, the most apex of apex predators, has so dominated the planet that most animals belonging to the apex category are endangered, we are still instinctively terrified of them on a grand scale.

To be fair, being eaten alive sounds in no way enjoyable, and these creatures are more than capable of killing humans in a variety of miserable ways given the right circumstances.

But we’ve engineered the world to avoid these dangerous animals at all costs, so we’re much more likely to be bitten by the guy standing behind us at Subway than we are by a bear or a shark (getting bitten by

a guy at Subway should be its own horror movie category).

Still, it’s not surprising that creature features are popular. If you can think of an animal, it’s probably got its own horror film. The more domestic the animal, the goofier the film (Cujo notwithstanding). There have been films about rabbits and sheep and cows and all manner of nonsense. But the ones we remember the best are the ones with teeth.

Alligators (and crocodiles) are a popular danger in film—Indiana Jones throws a cult leader to some in Temple of Doom, Betty White feeds a giant one in Lake Placid.

They’re a distinctly American one, as well, since we don’t have anywhere near the number of terrifying creatures as Australia or South Africa.

Directed by Alexandre Aja, Crawl is a new creature feature that highlights these animals in a mostly predictable (but fun!) way.

Haley (Kaya Scodelario) is student at the University of Florida, attending on swimming scholarship.

She seems to be good, but not the best, coming in second during a freestyle race at practice.

The beginning of the film is a highlight reel of her time in the water, often accompanied by her father and one time coach, Dave (Barry Pepper). We get the impression that he always pushed her, probably harder than he needed to, and that she harbors a sort of resentment towards him, especially now that he has split up with Haley’s mother.

After practice, Haley receives a call from her sister Beth, who says she can’t get in touch with Dave and is worried about him, as a hurricane is bearing down on the coast. Haley decides to drive to

“

There might be more going on in Crawl than alligator-eats-man horror. Most horror has something else to say beyond blood and guts.” their home town to find him, and like a true Floridian, ignores warnings about impassable roads from her friendly local police officers.

After a few missteps, she finds her father at their home, which he supposedly sold years ago.

He is stuck in the basement of the house, having been attacked by a large alligator that apparently came in through a storm drain. As the category five hurricane dumps sheets of water on the town, Haley and Dave are trapped in a basement gradually filling with water and alligators.

Like most horror movies, Crawl expects audiences to ignore certain realities in favor of new ones the filmmaker has chosen.

First, even though the basement is surrounded by brick shaped into diamond patterns that conveniently let water rush in from the outside, it would be impossible to break through these bricks by kicking the weak sections of the wall or, maybe, to use the shovel you’ve been fending the gators off

✴ NEW IN THEATERS ✴

with to create a hole large enough to crawl through.

Second, alligators absolutely never get full, can easily leap into a boat like the shark at the end of Jaws, and are very, very sneaky.

Third, a second-string college swimmer can easily outswim highly evolved aquatic lizards. However, if you choose not to think about these things and just enjoy the alligator carnage, Crawl is a pretty good time.

There might be more going on in Crawl than alligator-eats-man horror. Most horror has something else to say beyond blood and guts. It could easily be seen as a warning about climate change.

If we don’t get carbon emissions under control, storms like the one in the film will likely become more intense and more frequent, which could lead to some troubling scenarios.

Robert Frost holds with those who favor fire for the end of the world. I think I might prefer something more reptilian.

Once Upon a Time...in Hollywood A faded television actor and his stunt double strive to achieve fame and success in the film industry during the final years of Hollywood's Golden Age in 1969 Los Angeles.

Director: Quentin Tarantino Stars: Leonardo DiCaprio, Brad Pitt

Skin A destitute young man, raised by racist skinheads and notorious among white supremacists, turns his back on hatred and violence to transform his life, with the help of a black activist and the woman he loves.

Director: Guy Nattiv Stars: Jamie Bell, Danielle Macdonald

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • JULY 25, 2019 • THE PULSE • 21

COLUMN · ON THE BEAT

Justice Versus Double Standards Officer Alex goes head-to-head with clergy on a mission

I Alex Teach

Pulse columnist

“

I get that coppers are held to a higher one, but when that ‘higher’ standard becomes a ‘double’ standard, how do you expect either side to play the game with different rules (or at least rules of convenience)?”

When officer Alexander D. Teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he spends his spare time volunteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center.

WAS VERY INTERESTED TO SEE A group of pastors protesting on the sidewalk of the Hamilton County Courts building recently demanding three people resign for “egregious acts” not committed in their presence and otherwise not yet investigated.

They were basing this on a dash cam video of a handcuffed man who was recorded clearly trying to reach for something inside the back of his pants and two officers correcting this behavior with their hands and fists (the general admission price for the ticket he bought). Just as clearly we see the officers dropping his pants to see what the hell he was so determined to get at, and from his boxer shorts a small plastic bag is produced.

This was not a long sword or a Glock, but it was still an item he knew he wasn’t supposed to have and was charged with.

As for the search (as seen from a separate dash cam), while this is actually not the topic of my missive, let me touch on this for a moment (pardon the pun).

I’m one of the lucky few individuals in this world who has never had to have anything removed by force from my ass; everything inside of said cavity has egressed of its own accord as biology intended.

That said? If something I had (or had not) chosen to cram up there was to be removed...I really think my underwear would get in the way of this. Dude was still in his chonies and the slick plastic baggie was produced almost immediately.

Now I also have not chosen to hide anything between my butt cheeks (much less inside me) so I’m speaking out of assumptions here myself, but I think a reasonable person WOULD agree that something lodged in my colon would

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necessitate the removal of my undergarments.

“Getting up in there” with an unwilling participant just lends itself to the concept of access, particularly when forced. I say all that to say the Sheriff’s conclusion that he didn’t think this guy was cavity searched doesn’t seem that outlandish.

Hey, it’s video. Back to the topic though (despite that delightful detour down the Colon Road).

The topic of what happened will be decided in the hands of the Sheriff’s Office internal affairs and administration and eventually civil court so I’ll leave that there. But the irony of “demanding” people resign and or be fired without due process is worthy of a silver medal in this special-needs Olympiad because these are often literally the first to demand “due process” when it’s not the cops on trial.

Why the different sets of standards?

I get that coppers are held to a higher one, but when that “higher” standard becomes a “double” standard, how do you expect either side to play the game with different rules (or at least rules of convenience)?

Direct your anger here. Not towards why the same guy was in jail for violent

felonies three hours later (which really has nothing to do with the accusations), or what led him to a life that involves cramming drugs into your butt cheeks in the first place. Don’t march on the sidewalk as preachers and ministers about how one in five children in this country experience chronic hunger.

March because a convicted felon wrestled with deputies and didn’t have the sense to NOT reach for the baggie of drugs down the back of his pants. Because, “Justice.” Demand people resign or be fired without evidence between demanding people be released from prison who are there because of evidence.

Let’s compromise perhaps, and after you are finished giving into your emotions, let me know what the next steps you’ll be taking in the life of Mr. John Doe there are. Because surely this isn’t “it” is it? Job training? Drug rehab? Parenting classes? Getting him something other than possibly the worst defense lawyer in three states? Surprise us by not being one-trick ponies “of God”.

Otherwise, you look like priority-lacking profiteers. But what do I know?

I use pants pockets instead of “prison wallets” for storage, but at least I’m not claiming to be an expert.

JONESIN' CROSSWORD

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): The Queen of North America and Europe called me on the phone. At least that’s how she identified herself.

“I have a message for your Leo readers,” she told me. “Why Leo?” I asked. “Because I’m a Leo myself,” she replied, “and I know what my tribe needs to know right now.” I said, “OK. Give it to me.” “Tell Leos to always keep in mind the difference between healthy pride and debilitating hubris,” she said. “Tell them to be dazzlingly and daringly competent without becoming bossy and egomaniacal. They should disappear their arrogance but nourish their mandate to express leadership and serve as a role model. Be shiny and bright but not glaring and blinding. Be irresistible but not envy-inducing.”

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Congrats, Virgo! You are beginning the denouement of your yearly cycle.

Anything you do to resolve lingering conflicts and finish up old business will yield fertile rewards.

Fate will conspire benevolently in your behalf as you bid final goodbyes to the influences you’ll be smart not to drag along with you into the new cycle that will begin in a few weeks. To inspire your holy work, I give you this poem by Virgo poet Charles Wright: “Knot by knot I untie myself from the past / And let it rise away from me like a balloon. / What a small thing it becomes. / What a bright tweak at the vanishing point, blue on blue.”

“Starter Cash”—it’s on the money.

ACROSS 1 Kingdom 6 Abbr. followed by a date 11 TikTok, for one 14 “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf?” playwright 15 1980s Attorney General Ed 16 Head-smacking Stooge 17 British currency for entering a website?

19 “Blue Rondo ___ Turk” (Brubeck song) 20 Safe desserts?

21 Massage therapist’s subj.

22 Tuber in a sack 24 Adult ed. course 25 Before, to Longfellow 26 Provide diversion 28 Brazilian currency to be unearthed years later?

33 Dunderhead 34 Bus. alternative to a partnership 35 Sea on the border of Kazakhstan

36 “She Blinded Me With Science” singer Thomas 39 Run, old-style 40 Spray brand 41 Troupemate of John, Terry, Terry, Michael and Graham 42 Hot tub sigh 43 “Green Acres” prop 44 South Korean currency exceeding in frequency?

50 Not live 51 Exclamation of pain 52 Neither’s companion 53 Naomi of “Vice” 55 Tar’s tankardful 57 ___ Cat! (cat food brand that’s somehow still around) 58 Gas station offering 59 Multi-country currency sprung at the last minute?

62 Lupino of “Beware, My Lovely” 63 “If I Had a Hammer” singer Lopez 64 Brunch beverage 65 One complete

circuit 66 Antique photo tone 67 Beyond full DOWN 1 Logic, for one 2 Plaza Hotel girl of fiction 3 Grandma, in Granada 4 Microscope component 5 ___ school 6 Artist who originated the term “stan” 7 “Sonic the Hedgehog” company 8 Octopus arm 9 “Just ___ suspected” 10 All out of shape, like a wrecked bike frame 11 Open mic participants 12 End of the world?

13 Fruit cocktail fruit 18 Goa garments 23 Inspector who knows the gold standard?

25 Craft-selling site 27 Cheese partner, for short 29 “I’m not a doctor, but I play one on

TV” costume 30 Yale who helped found Yale 31 Language spoken in Vientiane 32 Pipe fitter’s joint 36 Morning moisture 37 Gold, in Rome 38 Dryer component 39 Exercise that’s easy to grasp?

40 MGM cofounder Marcus 42 Fed on 43 Cable streaming service launched in 2010 45 Surprise wins 46 Lack of foresight?

47 Have a hunch about 48 Formal informer 49 Chowed down on some grass 53 Sing the blues 54 Title girl of a Verdi opera 56 Pasta suffix, commercially 57 Blue-green hue 60 Ending for past or post 61 Night wear

Copyright © 2019 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents perminute. Must be 18+ to call. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle No. 946

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): I predict that between now and the end of the year, a Libran genetic engineer will create a new species of animal called a dat. A cross between a cat and a dog, it will have the grace, independence, and vigilance of a Persian cat and the geniality, loyalty, and ebullient strength of a golden retriever. Its stalking skills will synthesize the cat’s and dog’s different styles of hunting.

I also predict that in the coming months, you will achieve greater harmony between the cat and dog aspects of your own nature, thereby acquiring some of the hybrid talents of the dat.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Scorpio poet Marianne Moore (1887– 1972) won the Pulitzer Prize and several other prestigious awards.

She was a rare poet who became a celebrity. That’s one of the reasons why the Ford car company asked her to dream up interesting names for a new model they were manufacturing. Alas, Ford decided the 43 possibilities she presented were too poetic, and rejected all of them. But some of Moore’s names are apt descriptors for the roles you could and should play in the phase you’re beginning, so I’m offering them for your use.

Here they are: 1. Anticipator. 2.

The Impeccable. 3. Tonnere Alifère (French term for “winged thun-

der”). 4. Tir á l’arc (French term for “bull’s eye”). 5. Regina-Rex (Latin terms for “queen” and “king”).

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): It’s conceivable that in one of your past lives you were a pioneer who made the rough 2,170-mile migration via wagon train from Missouri to Oregon in the 1830s.

Or maybe you were a sailor who accompanied the Viking Leif Eriksson in his travels to the New World five hundred years before Columbus. Is it possible you were part of the team assembled by Italian diplomat Giovanni da Pian del Carpine, who journeyed from Rome to Mongolia in the thirteenth century? Here’s why I’m entertaining these thoughts, Sagittarius: I suspect that a similar itch to ramble and explore and seek adventure may rise up in you during the coming weeks. I won’t be surprised if you consider making a foray to the edge of your known world.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): When the dinosaurs died off 65 million years ago, the crocodiles didn’t. They were around for 135 million years before that era, and are still here now. Why? “They are extremely tough and robust,” says croc expert James Perran Ross.

Their immune systems “are just incredible.” Maybe best of all, they “learn quickly and adapt to changes in their situation.” In accordance with the astrological omens, I’m naming the crocodile as your creature teacher for the coming weeks.

I suspect you will be able to call on a comparable version of their will to thrive. (Read more about crocs: tinyurl.com/ToughAndRobust.)

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): “My only hope is that one day I can love myself as much as I love you.”

Poet Mariah Gordon-Dyke wrote that to a lover, and now I’m offering it to you as you begin your Season of Self-Love. You’ve passed through other Seasons of SelfLove in the past, but none of them has ever had such rich potential to deepen and ripen your self-love.

I bet you’ll discover new secrets about how to love yourself with the same intensity you have loved your most treasured allies.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “Poems can bring comfort,” writes Piscean poet Jane Hirshfield. “They let us know . . . that we are not alone—but they also unseat us and make us more susceptible, larger, elastic. They foment revolutions of awareness and allow the complex, uncertain, actual world to enter.” According to my understanding of upcoming astrological omens, Pisces, life itself will soon be like the poems Hirshfield describes: unruly yet comforting; a source of solace but also a catalyst for transformation; bringing you healing and support but also asking you to rise up and reinvent

yourself. Sounds like fun!

ARIES (March 21-April 19): After analyzing unusual animal behavior, magnetic fluctuations, outbreaks of mayhem on Twitter, and the position of the moon, a psychic has foretold that a moderate earthquake will rumble through the St. Louis, Missouri area in the coming weeks. I don’t agree with her prophecy. But I have a prediction of my own. Using data about how cosmic forces are conspiring to amuse and titillate your rapture chakra, I predict a major lovequake for many Aries between now and August 20. I suggest you start preparing immediately.

How? Brainstorm about adventures and breakthroughs that will boost exciting togetherness. Get yourself in the frame of mind to seek out collaborative catharses that evoke both sensory delights and spiritual insights.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): “Tell me what you pay attention to and I will tell you who you are,” wrote Taurus philosopher José Ortega y Gasset. You could use that idea to achieve a finer grade of peace and grace in the coming weeks.

The navel-gazing phase of your yearly cycle has begun, which means you’ll be in closest alignment with cosmic rhythms if you get to know yourself much better.

One of the best ways to do that is to analyze what you pay most attention to. Another excellent way is to expand and refine and tenderize your feelings for what you pay most attention to.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Uruguayan author Eduardo Galeano wrote that in Havana, people refer to their friends as mi sangre, my blood, or mi tierra, my country.

In Caracas, he reported, a friend might be called mi llave, my key, or mi pana, my bread. Since you are in the alliance-boosting phase of your cycle, Gemini, I trust that you will find good reasons to think of your comrades as your blood, your country, your key, or your bread. It’s a favorable time for you to get closer, more personal, and more intimate. The affectionate depths are calling to you.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Your emotional intelligence is so strong right now that I bet you could alleviate the pain of a loved one even as you soothe a long-running ache of your own. You’re so spiritually alluring, I suspect you could arouse the sacred yearning of a guru, saint, or bodhisattva. You’re so interesting, someone might write a poem or story about you.

You’re so overflowing with a lust for life that you might lift people out of their ruts just by being in their presence. You’re so smart you could come up with at least a partial solution to a riddle whose solution has evaded you for a long time

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