The Pulse 15.48 » November 29, 2018

NOVEMBER 29, 2018

CHATTANOOGA'S WEEKLY ALTERNATIVE

THE

CELEBRATING SOUTHSIDE MAINX24 IS BACK, BIGGER AND MORE EXCITING THAN EVER BEFORE

RYAN COOPER CARL ▪ DANI BELL & THE TARANTIST ▪ WHISKEY TRAVELING

THE

sponsored by tattoo wizards of

Main Line Ink

ConVEntion oF secREts

tO Be rE-OPenEd! iterary INK is a gathering of artists, tattooers, wizards, radio personalities, chefs, shopkeepers and all manner of non-magic folk, hosted by our very own Main Line Ink tattoo emporium. The Chattanooga Convention Center plays host for this one-of-a-kind magical tattoo convention.

G

houl and gore fans can snag an autograph or print from comic book artist and Walking Dead co-creator Col. Tony Moore! Tattoo Wizards from TV’s Ink Master and artists from as far as Australia will be in attendence for this enchanted weekend. For more details, check us out at literaryink.co!

TEACHER’S PET 3-DAY PASS AVAILABLE NOW! 2 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

ARTWORK BY @EARTHGRASPER

INSIDE THIS ISSUE VOLUME 15, ISSUE 48 • NOVEMBER 29, 2018

BREWER MEDIA GROUP Publisher James Brewer, Sr. FOUNDED 2003 BY ZACHARY COOPER & MICHAEL KULL

EDITORIAL Managing Editor Gary Poole gary@chattanoogapulse.com Assistant Editor Brooke Brown City Editor Alex Curry Music Editor Marc T. Michael Film Editor John DeVore Contributors Rob Brezsny • Kevin Hale Matt Jones • Ernie Paik Rick Pimental-Habib • Alex Teach Michael Thomas • Jason Tinney Editorial Interns Allan Duggar • Ethan Palmer Cartoonists Jen Sorenson • Tom Tomorrow Holiday Gift Guide Kelly Lockhart

ADVERTISING Director of Sales Mike Baskin mike@brewermediagroup.com Account Executives Rick Leavell • Cindee McBride Libby Phillips • Danielle Swindell

CONTACT Offices 1305 Carter St. Chattanooga, TN 37402 Phone 423.265.9494 Email info@chattanoogapulse.com Website chattanoogapulse.com Facebook @chattanoogapulse THE FINE PRINT: The Pulse is published weekly by Brewer Media and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on music, the arts, entertainment, culture and local news. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publisher may take more than one copy per weekly issue.

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8 4 20

Celebrating The Southside 24-hour segments seem to come and go at blazing speed, often with little distinction between a Tuesday and a Thursday. The hours of our lives flow on and it becomes all too easy to have a moment of clarity and wonder how it’s already autumn again.

THE NORTH SHORE

12

WIDE EYED PSYCHEDELIA

26

I have been a Chattanooga resident for nearly five years at this point in my life. Recently, my wife and I moved into a triplex in the North Shore and things are looking up.

Debuting in 2015 with Dark West, San Diego based Dani Bell is set to release her second recording, the LP Wide Eyed, on January 18th, and it's a very strong sophmore effort.

ILLUSIONS AND VISIONS

When you first meet Ryan Cooper Carl, you know you’re in for an interesting conversation. “I painted that mural,” he gestures. He is referring to a massive, trippy, pork-themed work.

FIGHT THE GOOD FIGHT

As I’ve mentioned many times over the course of my tenure at The Pulse, there are no new stories.

Everything that can be told has been told. There are new shades, new angles, new perspectives.

5 CONSIDER THIS

22 MUSIC CALENDAR

28 FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

7 DAY TRIPPIN'

24 MUSIC REVIEWS

29 JONESIN' CROSSWORD

14 ARTS CALENDAR

25 HEALTH & WELLNESS

30 ON THE BEAT

16 HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE

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CITY LIFE · BETWEEN THE BRIDGES

The North Shore Renaissance One of the most interesting parts of town keeps getting better

By Ethan Palmer Pulse Contributor

“

We fell in love with this street just about immediately.

We love the neighborhood, we like the look of the neighborhood, and we like the direction that everything is going.”

I

HAVE BEEN A CHATTANOOGA RESIDENT FOR NEARLY five years at this point in my life. For the majority of my time in this beautiful city, I have lived in Red Bank but recently, my wife and I moved into a triplex in the North Shore and things are looking up.

The walking distance and convenience of the area is a breath of fresh air.

So when I first moved to Chattanooga, North Shore is what really sold me on the city. I distinctly remember going to stores like All Things Groovy and Winder Binder and completely falling in love with the area.

Another big pull for me was the dog groomer slash treat bakery, it had such a sense of a mini-Portland to me that I couldn’t pass up the opportunity to put down roots.

During these five years of living in the downtown region, a lot of business has moved away from the North Shore area and migrated towards the south side of

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town, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that North Shore has lost all of its business or popularity. Recently, a lot of new and exciting things began happening on the other side of the river and I’m here to fill you in on all of the details.

I had a chance to sit down and interview two North Shore businesses, one being a well-established local hub while the other was a new up and coming vendor. First of all, Winder Binder has been a staple of the Chattanooga community for more than twenty years. Mandy Abercrombie, a manager at Winder Binder in the heart of North Shore, shared her

opinions on all of the changes happening around the riverside.

“I personally love it, but I am a little weary of some of the more high-end things like condominiums. I wish it was a little bit more centered around businesses,” Abercrombie said.

“I never saw a huge group leave from here, it’s more of two different types. The Southside tends to be more college oriented while we have more families around North Shore. I think now because of this boom the places that I like to visit such as Sluggos have a better chance of staying in business, which is really cool.”

Winder Binder has been a part of the North Shore community for quite some time, but I also wanted to get the opinion of someone who recently joined the north side scene. Scott Barnett, the owner of Tennessee Hemp Exchange, just recently set up shop on Cherokee Boulevard and his reasons on the choice of location for his shop were positive to say the least.

“When we researched the area we actually chose this place specifically. We fell in love with this street just about immediately. We love the neighborhood, we like the look of the neighborhood, and we like the direction that everything is going,” said Barnett. “The city has changed a couple of times, but it always seems to be for the better.”

There is no doubt that North Shore is the new place to be. Even if everyone is talking about the Southside the North Shore never left and it never will. Support your local businesses on the north side of the river and keep Chattanooga spinning!

Hiking, Drinking, Rucking Not your normal Saturday athletic endeavor

Cons ider This w ith Dr. Rick

“The key to serenity is trusting that the universe has your back.” — G. Bernstein

Do you like to put yourself to the test, if only occasionally? Have you got the drive to get the runner’s high and physically push yourself while having a great time?

Or do you just want to see others push it to the limit for you while you sip on that cold craft beer?

This Saturday comes yet another reason to get out and enjoy MAIN24. Chattanooga’s own GORUCK club hosts a brew ruck: a race with weighted backpacks, in teams of 2 or 4, to various breweries and bars throughout downtown.

Hoof it in whatever fashion you choose: running, walking, or both.

Complete the challenges, feel the burn, and drink the beer!

Men are required to carry 30 pounds, and women 20 pounds.

But this is team oriented and will not simply be a challenge for your legs, but also your liver.

It starts at the Tap House in St. Elmo at 10 a.m. with all teams meeting at 10:30 a.m.

At each of the stops you make, which the order is up to each team, there will be a unique and secret

team challenge.

Teams will need share a photo of the brewery and team members on a team Instagram page to check off each stop.

All participants receive a free beer of their choice from Heaven and Ale Brewing Co., and those who make the cutoff time of six hours earn a custom Chattanooga Brew Ruck Pack.

To find out more information and to register, head over to runsignup. com. And get ready to ruck!

— Allan Duggar

When we become clear about our wants and needs, we can then think about them, speak about them, write them down, ponder them and keep them in the front of our mind.

This is the moment when the universe hears you loud and clear and becomes your “senior partner” in showing you answers, working to help you manifest your desires.

The trick becomes catching the answers… being vigilantly aware of inspirational conversations, readings, ideas that are aligned with what you’ve been asking for. From billboards to fortune cookies, you’ll be surrounded.

So, think for a moment how very important it is to stay positive, to believe in your dreams, to imagine them already happening, and passionately continue to move ever forward.

And then, the most important part: To be grateful. Consider this, from Eckhart Tolle: “If the only prayer you ever say is ‘Thank You,’ that will be enough.

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COLUMN · DAY TRIPPIN'

The Tennessee Whiskey Trail Jason Tinney

Pulse contributor

“

Eleven distilleries make up the East, including Chattanooga Whiskey Experimental Distillery which brought distilling back to the Scenic City after a 100-year absence.”

Jason Tinney is the author of “Ripple Meets the Deep” and two collections of poetry and prose. As an actor, Jason recently starred in “Free To Go”, which premiered at the Manhattan Repertory Theatre this year.

I’m bound for the heartland of East Tennessee’s moonshine country. There’s enough bite in the late autumn air to warrant a weathered leather jacket and tastes from stills setting the Smoky Mountains ablaze. Robert Mitchum’s dark amber crooning, “…and there was thunder, thunder over “Thunder Road” / Thunder was his engine and white lightening was his load…” echoes off vintage hot rods lining the used car lots of these byways where “trippers” used to run their rare old mountain dew.

Eluding revenuers to oblige thirsty customers, moonshiners traced wild frontier footprints among these hills steeped in independence and rebellion where the spirits linger. The Tennessee Whiskey Trail gives us chase to those spirits.

Launched in 2017, the Trail is a selfguided adventure into the culture and craft of one our country’s oldest and most loved libations. Comprised of more than 31 distilleries across the state, from boutique-style operations to the big fellas who go by Jack and George, the trail highlights the diverse enterprises spanning three regions: West, Middle, and East.

Eleven distilleries make up the East, including Chattanooga Whiskey Experimental Distillery which brought distilling back to the Scenic City after a 100-year absence. Building upon the reform of Tennessee prohibition-era laws in 2009, Chattanooga Whiskey spearheaded further legislative change in 2013 that opened doors for craft distilleries across the state.

“Our saying on our wall is ‘Whiskey to the People.’ It’s all about being part of a movement,” says Tim Piersant, Chattanooga Whiskey’s Co-founder and President. “Chattanooga was one of the largest distilling towns in North America pre-prohibition. To be the first back with a history like that—we’re reviving our history not just for Chattanooga but for the whole state of Tennessee. It wouldn’t be nearly as cool of a story if we didn’t

have that history as our foundation.”

Holiday traditions are in overdrive at Old Forge Distillery in Pigeon Forge.

Small-batch rums, vodkas, and, yes, moonshines can be sampled—creations of Head Distiller Keener Shanton.

Mixologist Stacy Waters stamps my “passport,” a pocket-sized booklet for travelers to record distillery visits. Waters recommends her Santa’s Coffee, a coffee moonshine and ice cream liqueur blend topped with whipped cream and fresh, shaved nutmeg.

Kris Tatum, Old Forge’s general manager, is President of the Tennessee Distillers Guild encompassing the 31-member organization. The guild represents 99 percent of distilled spirits produced in Tennessee and 54.9 percent of all distilled spirits the state exports internationally.

“Tennessee whiskey is known across the world,” Tatum says. “You ask somebody where they’re from and they say Tennessee, you’re going to want to talk to them about Dolly, Elvis, or Jack Daniels.”

For Tatum, the personal connections strengthen the value behind distilling.

“It’s part of our fabric,” he says. “It seems everybody has a story. Somebody in their family or close friends used to bootleg, or they used to sell the corn, or they purchased some land and found some old stills. It touches every single generation I know.”

Tatum and Piersant are part of a younger generation carving new paths while also keeping products rooted to libation lineage. In Sevierville, Head Distiller Justin Holeman and Marketing Director Kyle Tarwater—high school buddies—operate Tennessee Legend Distillery.

“I think it’s a southern thing. It’s easier

to get that camaraderie when you’re sharing a glass of whiskey,” says Holeman. “I think if you’re from California you may feel that way about wine, but I think that speaks to the heart of this region. We’ve got whiskey in our blood.”

Kent Merritt, President of Thunder Road Distillery in Kodak, welcomes new ideas with the tried and true.

“The flavors aren’t something I remember from when I was young,” Merritt says of their array from watermelon to cinnamon. “But that’s what’s popular now. The straight corn whiskey is very good, it has its following.” He pauses, smiles. “That’s what I drink.”

It’s this living crossroads that calls so many of us to the trail. A 35-pound copper pipe still adorns a ledge inside Thunder Road. Lloyd Dwight Bearden helped build it when he was 17—fortysome-odd-years-ago.

“That little still you see out there, we’d run that ten-stillfuls a night to make enough alcohol we could sell to get a little extra money,” Bearden says. “Some people looked down on it. Most people back in the day had to do it because there was no work. It fed families even if you weren’t directly involved. If you ran a garage—most of the people who had the liquor cars—you souped up their motors and made them run faster.

And the people at the stores would sell the fruit jars. It gave a small old farmer a chance to be a businessman. That’s what it basically boiled down to.”

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COVER STORY

Celebrating The Southside MAINX24 is back, bigger and more exciting than ever before

By Alex Curry

“

Pulse contributor

2018 continues this trajectory, promising to be the biggest and most exciting yet. So much is going on that I barely had room to even begin.”

24

-hour segments seem to come and go at blazing speed, often with little distinction between a Tuesday and a Thursday. The hours of our lives flow on and it becomes all too easy to have a moment of clarity and wonder how it’s already autumn again. We see ourselves another year older, another year further into this inexplicable journey through each of our respective simulations.

It’s often easy to forget just how much can be accomplished in 24 hours. Have no fear, a reminder is on the way. MAINx24, Chattanooga’s annual 24-hour super-fest will arrive on Main Street on December 1st as a stark and wonderful reminder.

MAINx24 has, for the past 12 years, grown from a quaint bohemian celebration to a full-on street festival with parades, dancing, comedy, food, live

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music, and countless other celebratory pleasantries.

2018 continues this trajectory, promising to be the biggest and most exciting yet. So much is going on that I barely had room to even begin.

Hang tight for a multitude of snippets, a quick and rambunctious burst of just some of the possible delights that this single day will hold. And consider in the coming year; maybe a day

is a bit longer than we tend to give it credit for.

Main Line Ink will host a Harry Potter art show at their tattoo studio and art gallery. They will also participate in the annual parade with wizardly cosplay characters as they gear up for their upcoming festival in February. Special treats from Chef Christopher Adgate will please taste buds... while they last.

Think it’ll be too cold for Ice Cream? Shenanigans! Clumpie’s Southside location will host a fullon brunch founded in everything ice-cream. Ice cream cocktails, ice cream French toast, breakfast cereal ice cream sundaes, unique coffee beverages, the taste-bud-teasing list goes on.

This new-kid-on-the-block is coming out swinging with excellent options for a perfect MAINx24 kickoff. It starts at 7:30 a.m. on Saturday morning and is the de facto place to be.

Main Street favorite Clyde’s will host a block party that will last from early to late. They will present live music inside and out and will have drink specials galore. The SEC Championship will be on the tube as local musicians fill the air with fun tunes. Stop in, wander around, and stop in again!

Ever tried bubble tea? Here’s your chance to get behind the booming new tapioca craze. Stop in at Engel & Völkers and try Sugar B’s version during the festival.

Started in the ‘80s in Taiwan, Boba tea (more commonly known locally as Bubble Tea) is a milk tea with a base of tapioca balls and often shaved ice. It’s a sweet drink and a favorite of many tea connoisseurs. As is common with many legendary foods, the exact roots are debated. What isn’t debatable is

“

My absolute favorite part of MAINx24, the World Heavyweight Chili Championship will return at 11:30 a.m.

This year, they have added a category for cornbread, which thrills my heart!”

Bubble Tea’s massive success. Stop in and give it a try!

Alleia restaurant will host the Masquerade on Main beginning at 10:30 p.m. The Appalachian Disco Collective will be rocking beats until early in the morning. Come out and see DJ’s Ben Lee, Ian F, Paradiso Music, and Lukangg. Best of all, no cover charge!

My absolute favorite part of MAINx24, the World Heavyweight Chili Championship will return at 11:30 a.m. This year, they have added a category for cornbread, which thrills my heart!

This is a great opportunity to try as

many different kinds of chili as you can stand. It’s a chance to warm up and dive into Chattanooga’s heaviest hitters as they perfect years of making the succulent and hearty dish. Best to show up early before I eat everything in sight.

“The event provides support to the many programs of Greenspaces including Empower that teaches low-income residents low and no-cost ways to reduce their utility bills,” says Dawn Hjelseth, the organizer of the cook-off.

Another new-to-the-scene addition is the King Street Royal Ruckus.

Co-hosted by the new Moxy Hotel

and WanderLinger Brewing Company, several events will make for a grand introduction with live music, charity opportunities for the Chattanooga Community Kitchen, food trucks, and an adoption area from McKamey Animal Center. Come check it out and welcome Chattanooga’s newest neighbors!

In addition to their delicious coffees, Mean Mug will host arguably the most important special guest of the year.

Santa Claus himself will be available for photographs and wish collecting.

Come out, decorate sugar cookies, and use this chance to get yourself off of the naughty list before the big day.

Following the parade, The Flying Squirrel will host LoMeinx24, a feast of Chinese food, bloody Mary’s and drink specials. Danimal Pinson will be providing rhythms all day and at 5 p.m., the party pivots to adults only.

Perhaps the silliest and most intriguing event of Chattanooga’s entire year, the Adult Big Wheel Race is back to

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COVER STORY

scrape elbows and infect smiles. After the annual parade, head on over to the Choo Choo Gardens to watch the fun. A track of twists, turns, and obstacles will put 20 different teams of 21-and-up adults up against fierce competition.

The Forgotten Child Fund will hold their annual pancake breakfast starting at 6:30 AM on December 1st. We highly encourage you to bring a new toy or children’s jacket to donate to the charity to help make Christmas a reality for all children. Come out and help your community reach its potential of sharing and charity while you chow down on delicious pancakes.

How about showing off your sci-fi skills with a lightsaber? Con Nooga’s Saber Idol is your chance, 30 seconds with all eyes on you. Show off your combat skills, entertainment value, and rhythm with the music for a chance at true greatness. Lightsabers will be provided, or feel free to bring your own. 405 East Main, 7 p.m. Be 10 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

there. Be ready.

MAINx24 isn’t all rowdy fun and games. Chattanooga’s thriving art scene also makes a prominent appearance at the festivities. One such opportunity to support and appreciate Chattanooga’s artistic side will exist at Purple Sky Healing Arts from 3:00 to 5:00 PM. Robin Burk’s brilliant nighttime photography and crystal jewelry will be available for appreciation.

Have you been floating yet? After the wrap up of the MAINx24 Parade, stop in at Lucidity Float and Wellness Center and check out the amazing healing opportunities available in our own hometown.

Oh, and enjoy a free beer from Heaven & Ale while you’re looking around. Register to win a free float or a tour from ChattaBrew Tours. Treat yourself and book a float. You’ll be amazed at how you feel.

Have no fear, MAINx24 is no reason to miss the game. Feed Co. will show both the SEC and the ACC champion-

“

If you come out for one thing, make sure it’s from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m. for the funky, fabulous, and weird. A parade to shame all others. A celebration of a year gone by and a new year to come.” ship along with all of their other fun surprises for kids and adults alike.

One of Main Street’s newest additions, Bleu Fox Cheese Shop will offer cheese plate cones for wandering explorers. Artisanal cheeses, charcuteries, olives, crackers, and accouterments will be available for munching.

A vegetarian option is available, so there’s no need to pass up this opportunity.

“You’ll have everything you love about a great cheese plate in a cone so you can easily snack on it as you stroll around Southside. And also, it’s our birthday, so we certainly need your help celebrating!” commented the vivacious cheese shop.

And here we arrive, at the most important part of this and any other festival. Without a doubt, the parade is the focal point of any successful MAINx24.

If you come out for one thing, make sure it’s from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m. for the funky, fabulous, and weird. A parade to shame all others. A celebration of a year gone by and a new year to come. I’ll leave most of it a surprise, but of particular note is H.A.R.R.I.E.T, a self-propelled interactive robotic pay phone that will participate in the parade.

Andrew Rodgers, the robot’s designer, shares his thoughts on the concept: “H.A.R.R.I.E.T. seeks to create surprise and delight in the viewer by presenting a ubiquitous piece of our

public infrastructure in a unique and unexpected way, my hope is that the viewer is inspired to examine their own relationship with technology, and how the technology and what we do with it has evolved over time.” Come out and experience the many surprises for yourself!

It’s not only a fun-filled day in Chattanooga’s thriving revitalized Main Street neighborhood, but it has the ability to act as a prompt reminder.

A reminder that these hours that seem to be gone before they even begin, the hours lost sitting at traffic lights, or spent mindlessly browsing social media outlets, the hours spent sitting in offices chairs or whatever it is we do, these hours are important, precious, a gift, once here, gone forever.

It’s a reminder to treasure the time that we have. To spend more time happy and celebrating our friends and family. More time pursuing greatness in our lives and with those that we love. More time remembering why we’re all here.

Get a full schedule of all 24-hours of events online at mainx24.com

December 1, 2018 Line-up:

Alex Curry has explored the world as an entertainment technician and traveler.

During his three-year stint working in Asia, he fell in love with the cultural and culinary delights of the world.

11 am - 1 pm - Music by Lori Buttons 3 pm - 5 pm - Around the World in 120 minutes 7 pm - Midnight - GNOSTiK Soundsystem Cultures present

For more information check out our Facebook Page!

400 East Main Street adellescreperie.com granfalloonchattanooga.com

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • THE PULSE • 11

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT

Illusions And Visions Ryan Cooper Carl's art is undeniably memorable

Get To Know Your Neighbors The community of Chattanooga is diverse and popping with culture. That’s why it’s important to get out of your comfort zone, and why I am here to tell you if you care about this city and the people who live in it, you should come down to the Amani Chattanooga event titled “Our Neighbors”.

Photographer William Johnson has spent the last year capturing the images that often go unseen in certain areas of Chattanooga. That is all about to change now as “Our Neighbors” is all about showcasing the beautiful and unique people that live in Ridgedale and Highland Park.

Many of us who live in the city are unaware of some of our neighbors and William Johnson wants to change how we see things around these communities. That is why it is important that we truly know our neighbors, and understand the places that we live in as it helps us grasp what is going on beyond our usual scope, and how we can contribute.

This exhibit is presented by Chattanooga Neighborhood Enterprise and Johnson’s photographs will be sure to help us get to know our neighbors. The exhibit will be held at Amani Chattanooga located on 420 South Willow Street this Friday at 4:30 p.m.

Don’t miss such a special opportunity to broaden your scope of where your neighbors live, who they are, and what they stand for through the lens of such an incredible photographer. For more information, visit amaniafrica.org. — Ethan Palmer

By Kevin Hale Pulse contributor

“

His work could also be described as non-objective, with swirls, part illusion, hallucinogenic, bits and portions of arms and faces.

A patchwork really.”

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W

HEN YOU FIRST MEET RYAN COOPER CARL, you know you’re in for an interesting conversation. “I painted that mural,” he gestures. He is referring to the massive, trippy, pork-themed work that greets you on the main wall of Moe’s Original Barbeque on Market Street.

Carl got the opportunity from Mellow Mushroom’s Jason Jones, who also operates Moe’s.

Jones needed an artist to adorn the large walls in his restaurants.

So Carl broke out the scaffolding, acrylic paint and brushes to let the process begin. The mural is part galactic and psychedelic; part landscape with a pig looking blissed out.

“I want to convey particular ideas presented to me,” says Carl. “Simplistic, detailed, exotic woven canvases start raw in the center and become more de-

tailed as the image moves to the edges.”

His work could also be described as non-objective, with swirls, part illusion, hallucinogenic, bits and portions of arms and faces. A patchwork really.

“My work combines realistic detail with choppy brushstrokes,” says Carl.

He describes the opportunity to paint murals as random chance. Carl’s love of the galaxy and space infiltrate many of his works.

“I believe in life on other plan-

ets,” laughs Carl. “You are probably going to paint me as some weirdo but mathematically it’s impossible we’re alone in the universe.”

Carl is actually very down-to-earth and if he ever gets too far out, he always has his fiancé who is an accountant to keep him in check.

“I recently learned what hashtagging is,” says Carl. “It allows you to keep an eye on what your contemporaries are doing.”

It also allows the artist to know the right high-profile art shows to attend on the festival circuit.

Live music painting is another artistic avenue Carl loves. He was asked to participate in the Bonnaroo Arts and Music Festival Installation honoring Tom Petty last year.

“Matt Livingston with Lazy Monday Productions shot a great time lapse video showing me getting the piece ready for the live tribute,” says Carl.

The result is a painting of Tom Petty in all his psychedelic glory.

Carl also cites other live music events around town like Camp Chilla at Ziggy’s, JJ’s Bohemia, and MAINX24.

The New Year’s Eve Bassnectar show in 2017 is the kind of event where Carl shines. The event’s organizers’ intentions were to design a magical portal into an alternate universe.

“When you cross the Threshold, we intend to explore new undiscovered di-

“

When you cross the Threshold, we intend to explore new undiscovered dimensions using a time machine built out of human energy.” mensions using a time machine built out of human energy,” said organizers. “Sound unrealistic? We don’t think it’s unrealistic; we think it is inevitable.

A totally new physical space, a custom cut portal where we can converge as one big family to bring in the future together.”

The custom cut portal was at the Georgia World Congress Center in Atlanta, where Carl was thankful for the service elevator to avoid the crush of people ringing in the New Year.

He cites Irish graffiti artist Colon Harrington as an influence. Harrington started his career as a teenager tagging and doing graffiti anywhere he could in the streets of Ireland. Most of these nights were called hip-hop nights, where he would hang out with the DJs and MCs from around the country at clubs in 1990s Ireland.

Harrington uses realistic images of people and combines them with abstract elements that incorporate a meaning and story that relate to the events unfolding at the time. His pieces have been called dreamlike with the

balance between the senses and then the realism of the figures in the piece.

You might feel like you’re in a dream if you visit Hipster Vibes on Hixson Pike. This is where another large scale piece of Carl’s portrays a Rastafarian lion who greets clients to the head shop.

Carl also uses his interest in portraiture to paint and memorialize celebrities. Jeff Bridges’ The Dude from The Big Lebowski, Robin Williams and Bangerz-era Miley Cyrus are just a few realistic likenesses Carl depicts of these legends.

Carl faces the same dilemma many artists face: How to price your art.

“I would rather my art be in people’s hands rather than be stingy with it,” he says. “But if you price it by the square foot you’re not accurately valuing the piece. One square foot might be blank, the other very detailed.”

He thinks most artists tend to sell themselves short.

“I just hope to keep painting murals and spread the awareness; to share this visual storytelling.”

THU11.29

FRI11.30

SAT12.1

Holiday Firsts

Silent Disco Fundraiser

The Ugly Sweater Race

Support the Caribbean/ Tennessee Student Environmental Alliance while you dance!

7:30 p.m.

The Gear Closet 1510 Riverside Dr. gearcloset.org

Do we really need to explain this? Grab your worst holiday sweater and get ready to run.

7 p.m.

Harrison Bay State Park 8411 Harrison Bay Rd. tnstateparks.com

Come out and share holiday "firsts"—your first memorable gift, or anything that comes to mind!

6 p.m.

Chattanooga Workspace 302 W. 6th St. thechattery.org

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • THE PULSE • 13

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT CALENDAR

Ruby Falls Lantern Tours

THURSDAY11.29 Urban Farmers Market 3 p.m.

Miller Park 928 Market St. millerparkmarket.com Open Mic Storytelling Night: Holiday Firsts 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Workspace 302 W. 6th St. (423) 413-8978 thechattery.org Ice on the Landing 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Choo Choo 1400 Market St. iceonthelanding.com Hypnotist Gary Conrad 7:30 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com Alcoholics Not Anonymous Comedy Open Mic 8 p.m.

Barley Taproom 235 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 682-8200 chattanoogabarley.com Country Line Dancing Class 8 p.m.

Westbound Bar 24 Station St. (423) 498-3069 westboundbar.com Drop Up Video Comedy Show 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd.

14 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

(423) 266-1400 jjsbohemia.com

FRIDAY11.30 A Photo Exhibition of Highland Park and Ridgedale 4:30 p.m.

Amani Chattanooga 420 S. Willow St. (423) 531-6496 amaniafrica.com Out On 8th 5 p.m.

West Village 802 Pine St. (423) 424-1831 westvillagechattanooga.com Ice on the Landing 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Choo Choo 1400 Market St. iceonthelanding.com Hypnotist Gary Conrad

7:30, 9:45 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com Silent Disco Fundraiser 7:30 p.m.

The Gear Closet 1510 Riverside Dr. (423) 413-3298 gearcloset.org Improv “Movie” Night: Road Trip Movie!

8 p.m.

First Draft Theater 1800 Rossville Ave. (423) 843-1775 improvchattanooga.com Ruby Falls Lantern Tours 8:30 p.m.

Ruby Falls 1720 S. Scenic Hwy. (423) 821-2544 rubyfalls.com Good, Old Fashioned Improv

ENTERTAINMENT SPOTLIGHT

Imagine being immersed in a medley of holiday dreams and reverie, where childhood excitement with the wonder of Christmas merge with the modern celebration.

Hypnotist Gary Conrad The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. thecomedycatch.com

Show 10 p.m.

First Draft Theater 1800 Rossville Ave. (423) 843-1775 improvchattanooga.com

SATURDAY12.1 Signal Mtn. Nursery Christmas Open House 9 a.m.

Signal Mtn. Nursery 1100 Hubbard Rd. (423) 886-3174 Chattanooga Holiday Market 10 a.m.

Chattanooga Convention Center 1150 Carter St. 423) 648-2496 publicmarkets.us Brew Ruck Challenge Noon The Tap House 3800 St. Elmo Ave. (423) 682-8234 taphousechatt.com 56th Annual Singing Christmas Tree Noon, 5:30 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre 709 Broad St. (423) 757-5580 tivolichattanooga.com Red Wolf Feeding and Talk Noon Reflection Riding Arboretum 400 Garden Rd. (423) 821-1160 reflectionriding.org Ice on the Landing 6 p.m.

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT CALENDAR "The Public Image is Rotten"

E xperience the

Chattanooga Choo Choo 1400 Market St. iceonthelanding.com Autumn in West Village 6 p.m.

West Village 802 Pine St. westvillagechattanooga.com The Ugly Sweater Race 7 p.m.

Harrison Bay State Park 8411 Harrison Bay Rd. (423) 344-6214 tnstateparks.com Hypnotist Gary Conrad 7:30, 9:45 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com Holiday Jazz the Charlie Brown Way 8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 theatrecentre.com Whose Line Chattanooga 10 p.m.

First Draft Theater 1800 Rossville Ave. (423) 843-1775 improvchattanooga.com

SUNDAY12.2 Chattanooga Holiday Market 10 a.m.

Chattanooga Convention Center 1150 Carter St. 423) 648-2496 publicmarkets.us

Holiday English Tea 1 p.m.

The Houston Museum 201 High St. (423) 267-7176 thehoustonmuseum.org Family Fun Day: Sugarplums and Snowflakes 2 p.m.

Hunter Museum of Arts 10 Bluff View.

(423) 267-0968 huntermuseum.org "The Public Image is Rotten" 7:30 p.m.

Palace Theater 818 Georgia Ave. (423) 803-6578 chattpalace.com Ice on the Landing 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Choo Choo 1400 Market St. iceonthelanding.com Hypnotist Gary Conrad 7:30 p.m.

The Comedy Catch 1400 Market St. (423) 629-2233 thecomedycatch.com

MONDAY12.3 Autumn Belly Dance Session 5:45 p.m.

Movement Arts Collective 3813 Dayton Blvd.

(423) 401-8115 movementartscollective.com Ice on the Landing 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Choo Choo

1400 Market St. iceonthelanding.com Joggers & Lagers 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Brewing Co. 1804 Chestnut St. chattabrew.com Handlettering for Holiday Card Addressing 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Workspace 302 W. 6th St. (423) 413-8978 thechattery.org First Monday Improv Comedy 7:30 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347 barkinglegs.org

TUESDAY12.4 Wake Up & Run 6 a.m.

Fleet Feet Sports 307 Manufacturers Rd. (423) 771-7996 fleetfeetchattanooga.com Ice on the Landing 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Choo Choo 1400 Market St. Tuesday Night Chess Club 6 p.m.

Downtown Library 1001 Broad St. (423) 643-7700 chattilibrary.com Paths to Pints along the Riverwalk 6:30 p.m.

wonder !

The Tap House 3800 St. Elmo Ave. taphousechatt.com

WEDNESDAY12.5 Middle Eastern Dance 10:30 a.m.

Jewish Cultural Center 5461 North Terrace (423) 493-0270 jewishchattanooga.com Main Street Market 4 p.m.

522 W. Main St. mainstfarmersmarket.com DIY Holiday Themed Earrings 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Workspace 302 W. 6th St. (423) 413-8978 thechattery.org Ice on the Landing 6 p.m.

Chattanooga Choo Choo 1400 Market St. Naughty Knights Chess Meetup 7:30 p.m.

The Bitter Alibi 825 Houston St. (423) 362-5070 thebitteralibi.com Open Mic Comedy 8 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd.

Map these locations on chattanoogapulse.com. Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@chattanoogapulse.com

OPEN NOON TO 8 PM THURSDAY - SUNDAY, DEC. 1-9 DAILY, DEC. 13-23

423.821.2544 For tickets and details, visit:

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • THE PULSE • 15

Holiday

Shopping Guide

Some people just like cash for the holidays. With the Money Maze Puzzle Box, however, you can make them work for their money with a fun puzzle. Combine puzzle games and gift boxes into one with this gift holder puzzle box. It’s a fun, cool way to give a gift. $12.90 · agreatlifebrand.com

The AeroGarden Harvest Elite Slim is a simple, beautifully designed garden, versatile enough to fit almost anywhere, but perfect for the best room in the house…your kitchen.

It’s no secret homegrown veggies just taste better, and the Harvest will inspire you to discover the flavor of fresh no matter the season! $149.95 · aerogarden.com Go from workout to hangout with the VaporActive Atmosphere Jogger Pants, designed with a material that minimizes sweat and eliminates odor that’ll become their new go-to workout pants. $49.99 · mission.com

16 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

“I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.” Just recite the phrase and tap your wand to learn the location of every inch of Hogwarts with this Harry Potter Morphing Mug. The heat-sensitive, color changing mug transforms fas hot liquid is added from black to reveal a full color image of the Marauder’s Map. $18.99 · filmcellsltd.com Instead of putting photos in a locket, with the Essential Oil Diffuser Necklace, you can enjoy aromatherapy everywhere you go. Comes with eight reusable, highly absorbent round lava stones that will hold the oil of your choice for hours. $12.09 · megastore365.com

Not only is toting all your stuff in a backpack much easier on your body than using a shoulder bag, the AER Fit Pack 2 Backpack has everything you need to store gym clothes, a laptop, books...it even comes with a shoe compartment. $135 · nordstrom.com

Have a hankering for great chocolate treats from "across the pond"? This delectable Cadbury Selection Box comes chock full of ten of the top selling Cadbury British chocolate bars. You will receive all the chocolate bars in the 'Great British Treats' presentation box as pictured— guaranteed. And these are the full size UK products—not the smaller multi-pack bars, shipped direct from the United Kingdom. $13.99 · amazon.com THE PULSE • HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • 17

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18 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

Can’t figure out the perfect book, CD or game for that hard to shop for person on your list?

Problem solved! Get them a McKay’s Gift Certificate, good for anything in Chattanooga’s largest used books and more store. Get them online at mckaybooks.com or pick one up in person in the store at 7734 Lee Highway.

Can’t decided between a scented candle or body lotion for a gift? Get the best of both worlds with this 2 in 1 Body Lotion Candle. The hand poured soy candle turns to a soothing liquid lotion when burned, with an aroma of fresh figs and amber with a burst of floral notes. $24 · uncommongoods.com

Stay warm and cozy all through the holiday season with this festive Noble Mount lightweight Thermal Sleep Set styled for comfort.

Cotton rich blend makes it soft, comfortable and durable. The interior is brushed so it feels soft against the skin. $39.99 · noblemount.com

What’s better for brewing up a delicious cup of coffee than a beautiful Ritual French Coffee Press.

The glass body combined with the stainless steel frame and bamboo trim provides a beautiful, unique piece that is sure to impress your guests. Made with Thick thermal resistant Borosilicate glass that is durable enough to handle your everyday life. $21.97 · skysolutionsusa.com THE PULSE • HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • 19

THE MUSIC SCENE

Wide Eyed Psychedelia Dani Bell & The Tarantist impress once again

Homegrown Twang Time Of all the artists and music available to us at MAINX24 this weekend, there’s a local duo that stand out in a lovely way.

Playing from 11 to 1 p.m. at Slick’s Burger is the Brother and the Hayes: sibling musicians that serenade the ears with their old timey, yet original, sound.

Jennie Hayes Kurtz and David Bingaman hail from our beloved sibling state of Texas, but in recent years they’ve crafted their sound on stages in Chattanooga and Nashville. Both musicians share roles, as they’re both wonderful guitarists and singers.

But the banjo is another weapon of choice for Bingaman. When I heard “Pot and a Pan” at Barley Tap Room not that long ago, the twang and old school sound had me twisting my imaginary mustache in satisfaction (not to mention made for a damn good foot-stomping time).

To give the Brother and the Hayes a listen for yourself, head over to soundcloud. com/brotherandthehayes. If you like what you hear, then stick around and let’m know.

Other bands, such as R.A. and the Flames and Men of Soul, will be playing at Slick’s as well.

So come on down, get a burger and a beer, but please bring your dancing shoes.

— Allan Duggar

By Marc T. Michael Pulse Contributor

“

The band self-describes as ‘psychedelic pop’, and while that’s not an inaccurate description, it doesn’t do justice to the well-crafted tunes.”

20 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

D

EBUTING IN 2015 WITH DARK WEST, SAN DIEGO based Dani Bell is set to release her second recording, the LP Wide Eyed, on January 18th. Dark West was a strong debut, but many strong debuts give way to a less than stellar follow-up.

Such is not the case with Bell and the Tarantist.

Wide Eyed builds upon everything great about Dark West while adding a new and substantial emotional depth to the mix.

The band self-describes as “psychedelic pop”, and while that’s not an inaccurate description, it doesn’t do justice to the well-crafted tunes.

From the moment the sixties ended, folks have spoken with reverence (sometimes to the point of tiresome excess) of the music of “the sixties.”

No movie about the era is complete without a de facto soundtrack of Hendrix, CCR, Janis, et al., but this is a narrow view of a decade that saw the Motown juggernaut dominate the airwaves while pop music underwent a Renaissance that hasn’t been seen since.

This minor historical observation is necessary to provide the context for Dani’s music which draws from no one single influence but is rather an amalgam of the best of some distinctively different genres that spanned a

“

Though I question whether Dani and the band view it this way, I can’t help but hear the album as a loving tribute to an entire era of music, but with one very keen and important addition.” ten year period in the middle of the last century.

The band acknowledges the influence of early Motown on this record, and this is nowhere so evident as the second track, “Driving Me Crazy,” which could easily have been recorded by Ronnie Spector or Darlene Love.

Layer the vocals and it would be a dead ringer for Martha and the Vandellas.

On the other hand, tracks like the sitar-infused “The End,” and Iron Butterfly fuzztoned, “Mystery” are undeniably “psychedelic.” “Tension” and “Down” are Donovandreamy tracks with no small amount of Beatles/Stones hidden in the chords.

In fact, every track on the album draws from multiple influences, combining them seamlessly in new, and frankly, delightful ways.

Though I question whether

Dani and the band view it this way, I can’t help but hear the album as a loving tribute to an entire era of music, but with one very keen and important addition.

Bell’s vocals are achingly sweet, but that sweetness belies an underlying tension that, while not cynical, evinces a certain wariness absent from the source material.

It is this which makes the album so much more than a tribute or a clever mash-up of vintage styles because while the album is chock-full of sixties pop sound, that music was notoriously bubble-gum and naïve in its day.

This music is not.

While it’s not necessarily a “dark and gritty reboot,” it is the music of your parents or grandparents all grown up, reimagined for a time in which listeners are all too aware that the summer of

Redemption Comes To JJ's Bohemia

love gives way to the winter of our discontent.

Again, it isn’t cynical by any stretch, it is simply… aware, and this is a radical departure from its escapist forbearers.

Make no mistake, you could play this in the background all day and enjoy it simply as beautiful sounding music, but you could also delve deeper and see revealed a music much more firmly grounded in the reality of life in the modern age.

This synthesis of seemingly disparate elements, or at least the unconventional use of a musical style more commonly associated with “sunshine and lollipops” to express something deeper, at times darker, and certainly more “human,” is a stroke of genius and a testament to the artistry of Dani Bell and her bandmates.

Long the bastion of great local music, JJ‘s Bohemia, nestled in the heart of the MLK Blvd. creative district, once again demonstrates its commitment to bringing you the best of everything the scene has to offer with JJ’s Redemption this Friday.

Hosted by Rock Floyd and Kindora Camp, Redemption features some of the hottest rising hiphop stars in the region as Floyd and Camp are joined by Kay B Brown, Bbymutha, Chuck Bros, and Payday.

It’s an all-star lineup with reviews of Floyd, Camp and Brown found here in the archives of the Pulse while the reputations of Bbymutha, Chuck Bros and Payday speak for themselves.

The show is set to kick off at 9 p.m. Friday night.

If you’re a fan of hip-hop in general and Chattanooga hip-hop in particular, this is the one event you do not want to miss the season. w— MTM

THU11.29

FRI11.30

SAT12.1

Wild Child

West King String Band

Holiday Jazz the Charlie Brown Way

Heat up a cold night with original grassy folk music, clever songwriting, and some hot pickin'.

9 p.m.

HiFi Clyde’s 122 W. Main St. hificlydeschattanooga.com

Robert Crabtree & Friends bring the jazzy sounds of "Peanuts" to life for the holidays.

8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. theatrecentre.com

For seven years now this ensemble has carried its infectious blend of indie-pop and infectious melodies across the land.

9 p.m.

Songbirds South 41 Station St. songbirds.rocks

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • THE PULSE • 21

LIVE MUSIC CALENDAR THURSDAY11.29 Cat Man Smothers 2 p.m.

Virgola Wine Bar 608 Georgia Ave. chattanoogawinebar.com James Crumble Trio 6 p.m.

St. John’s Meeting Place 1278 Market St. stjohnsrestaurant.com Courtney Holder 6:30 p.m.

Westin Alchemy Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com The Daybreaks 7 p.m.

The Camp House 149 E. MLK Blvd. thecamphouse.com Toby Hewitt 7 p.m.

Backstage Bar 29 Station St. backstagechattanooga.com Open Mic Night 7 p.m.

Moccasin Bend Brewing Co. 3210 Broad St. bendbrewingbeer.com New Grass Express 7:30 p.m.

The Feed Co. Table & Tavern 201 W. Main St. feedtableandtavern.com Jesse James & Tim Neal 7:30 p.m.

Mexi-Wing VII 5773 Brainerd Rd. (423) 296-1073 Music for Flute and Guitar 7:30 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Keepin’ It Local 8 p.m.

The Social 1110 Market St. publichousechattanooga.com Wild Child, Future Generations 9 p.m.

Songbirds South 41 Station St. songbirds.rocks Open Mic Night with Jonathan Wimpee 9 p.m.

22 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

Lee Roy Parnell The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com

FRIDAY11.30 John Carroll 6:30 p.m.

Westin Alchemy Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Gino Fanelli 6:30 p.m.

Westin Dorato Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Tim Lewis 7 p.m.

El Meson 248 Northgate Park elmesonchattanooga.com Lee Roy Parnell 7 p.m Songbirds North 35 Station St. songbirds.rocks Silent Disco Fundraiser 7:30 p.m.

Gear Closet 1510 Riverside Dr. gearcolset.org Black Violin 8 p.m.

Walker Theatre 399 McCallie Ave. tivolichattanooga.com Goodie Mob 8 p.m.

The Signal 1810 Chestnut St. thesignaltn.com Road to Nightfall

8 p.m.

Barley Taphouse 235 E. MLK Blvd. chattanoogabarley.com Barrett Barber 8:30 p.m.

Puckett’s Restaurant 2 W. Aquarium Way puckettsgro.com Donna the Buffalo 9 p.m.

Songbirds South 41 Station St. songbirds.rocks Amber Fults 9 p.m.

The Feed Co. Table & Tavern 201 W. Main St. feedtableandtavern.com Jonathan Wimpee 9 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com West King String Band 9 p.m.

HiFi Clyde’s 122 W. Main St. hificlydeschattanooga.com Bbymutha, Kindora, Rock Floyd 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com Graham Winchester 9 p.m.

Tremont Tavern 1204 Hixson Pike tremonttavern.com Sullivan Band 10 p.m.

Bud’s Sports Bar

5751 Brainerd Rd. budssportsbar.com

SATURDAY12.1 Danimal 11:30 a.m.

Flying Squirrel 55 Johnson St. flyingsquirrelbar.com Bluegrass Brunch Noon The Honest Pint 35 Patten Pkwy. thehonestpint.com Behold the Brave 5:30 p.m.

Moxy Hotel 1220 King St. moxy-hotels.marriott.com 56th Annual Singing Christmas Tree Noon, 5:30 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre 709 Broad St. tivolichattanooga.com Preston Ruffing 6:30 p.m.

Westin Alchemy Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Megan Howard 6:30 p.m.

Westin Dorato Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Forever Bluegrass 7 p.m.

Westbound Bar 24 Station St. westboundbar.com Tim Lewis

Killswitch Engage 7 p.m.

El Meson 248 Northgate Park elmesonchattanooga.com John Cowan, Darin & Brooke Aldridge 7 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Killswitch Engage, Born of Osiris, Crowbar, Death Ray Vision 7:30 p.m.

The Signal 1810 Chestnut St. thesignaltn.com The Fumblebuckers 7:30 p.m.

Miss Griffin’s Footlong Hotdogs 847 E. Main St. missgriffinsfootlonghotdogs.com Holiday Jazz the Charlie Brown Way 8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River St. theatrecentre.com Christmas Pops 8 p.m.

Iles PE Center University Dr. southern.edu The Communicators 9 p.m.

HiFi Clyde’s 122 W. Main St. hificlydeschattanooga.com Swampwoofer Takeover 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com

Sullivan Band 10 p.m.

Bud’s Sports Bar 5751 Brainerd Rd. budssportsbar.com

SUNDAY12.2 Heart Hunters 11 a.m.

Flying Squirrel Bar 55 Johnson St. flyingsquirrelbar.com Carl Pmberton 11 a.m.

Westin Dorato Bar 801 Pine St. westinchattanooga.com Seaux Chill 1:30 p.m.

Flying Squirrel Bar 55 Johnson St. flyingsquirrelbar.com Katrina Barclay 3 p.m.

Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse 105 McBrien Rd. christunity.org A Classical Christmas 3 p.m.

Chattanooga State Humanities Theatre 4501 Amnicola Hwy. chattanoogastate.edu Bluegrass Jam 4 p.m.

Fiddlers Anonymous 2248 Dayton Blvd.

(423) 994-7497 Open Mic with Jeff Daniels 6 p.m.

Long Haul Saloon

2536 Cummings Hwy. (423) 822-9775 Mathis & Martin 7 p.m.

Backstage Bar 29 Station St. backstagechattanooga.com

MONDAY12.3 Open Air with Jessica Nunn 6 p.m.

The Granfalloon 400 E. Main St. granfalloonchattanooga.com Monday Nite Big Band 7 p.m.

The Coconut Room 6925 Shallowford Rd. thepalmsathamilton.com Very Open Mic with Shawnessey Cargile 8 p.m.

The Well 1800 Rossville Blvd. #8 wellonthesouthside.com

TUESDAY12.4 Live Jam Session w/ Freddy Mc & Friends Noon Granfalloon 400 E. Main St. granfalloonchattanooga.com Danimal 6 p.m.

Backstage Bar 29 Station St. backstagechattanooga.com Bill McCallie and In Cahoots

6:30 p.m.

Southern Belle 201 Riverfront Pkwy. chattanoogariverboat.com Open Mic Jam Session 7 p.m.

Crust Pizza 3211 Broad St. crustpizza.com Open Mic with Xll Olympians 8 p.m.

Barley Taproom 235 E. MLK Blvd. chattanoogabarley.com Open Mic with Mike McDade 8 p.m.

Tremont Tavern 1203 Hixson Pike tremonttavern.com

WEDNESDAY12.5 The Other Guys 6 p.m.

SpringHill Suites 495 Riverfront Pkwy.

Jesse James Jungkurth 7 p.m.

Backstage Bar 29 Station St. backstagechattanooga.com Jazz In The Lounge 7 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater 1307 Dodds Ave. barkinglegs.org Randall Adams 8 p.m.

The Office @ City Cafe 901 Carter St. citycafemenu.com Priscilla & Little Rickee 8 p.m.

Las Margaritas 1101 Hixson Pike (423) 756-3332 Killakeyz 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia 231 E. MLK Blvd. jjsbohemia.com Prime Cut Trio 9 p.m.

The Palms at Hamilton 6925 Shallowford Rd. thepalmsathamilton.com

APPEARING THIS WEEKEND

 THE MASTER HYPNOTIST COMING SOON December 6-9

RENO COLLIER

December 13-16

MR. SHOWTIME DAVID SCOTT BOOK YOUR HOLIDAY PARTIES NOW! Chattanooga’s Premier Comedy Club Tickets: (423) 629-2233 1400 Market Street on the Southside thecomedycatch.com

Map these locations on chattanoogapulse.com. Send event listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@chattanoogapulse.com CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • THE PULSE • 23

ERNIE PAIK’S RECORD REVIEWS

Wax Chattels Live at Part Time Punks (Captured Tracks)

Alan Courtis Buchla Gtr (Firework Edition)

T

ing of off-kilter rock that leaves the listener on edge and offbalance. This feeling of unease, wrapped up in throbbing outbursts, is what sets Wax Chattels apart.

While synth-punk forebears, such as Suicide or Métal Urbain, may lurk in one’s mind, the Screamers are a more apt comparison to Wax Chattels, but with a less bratty attitude and more brooding discomfort.

The new EP Live at Part Time Punks captures the group’s July performance at the Los Angeles radio station KXLU featuring five tracks from its deviously capricious and agitated self-titled debut album.

The opening track “Concrete” taps out a one-note keyboard Morse-code message with interjecting bursts that offer uncer-

he curse of having a reasonably good memory is remembering every ill-founded notion one ever had, and this writer recalls, briefly during early adolescence in an insufferable bout of music snobbery, having strong thoughts about the use of guitars (good!) and synths (bad!) in rock and punk music.

Certain ideologies should rightfully crumble with age and experience, purists be damned, and there’s a difference between being wise and being judgmental. So, in the year 2018, what to make of the Auckland, New Zealand trio Wax Chattels, stomping in a post-post-punk realm with drums, a bass and a keyboard?

Don’t overthink it; focus on what’s there, not what’s missing.

What’s there is a potent offer-

tain payoffs; tension builds as a sonic release oozes out, rather than bursting the blister, and the minimal one-note mystery eventually expands to two keyboard chords and echoing vocals.

Even more suspenseful is “Gillian,” named after Gillian Anderson from The X-Files, that simmers eerily before finally boiling over two-thirds of the way through the track. Going for more immediate gratification, the two-minute “It” uses a nervous keyboard skronk and machine-gun-fire snare-drum hits, amid both calm recitations and charged shouting, to get under the listener’s skin.

“In My Mouth” uses its Speakand-Spell toy tones and particular odd take on minimalism, punctured with stabs determined to disrupt any graceful poise.

Wax Chattels’ raw, primitive moments work well, but this writer can’t help but feel like the trio has potential yet to be unlocked—sort of like aural martial arts that both pummel and trip the listeners off their feet.

T

he late, pioneering electronic instrument inventor Don Buchla created devices that looked like panels from spacecraft with intimidating arrays of knobs, wires and sliders but no conventional keyboard, like a piano, in an intentional attempt to sway

musicians away from playing keyboard music on his inventions.

He represented the West Coast way of thinking in the ‘60s among electronic music proponents that frowned upon commercial, traditional music and favored the experimental. Buchla even said, “...if I made something that was too popular...I was doing something wrong...”

The non-traditional Argentinian musician Alan Courtis, known for his work with the outfit Reynols, explores the possibilities of one of Buchla’s inventions—the Buchla 200 modular synth—plus an electric guitar (and a multitude of processing effects) on the double-album Buchla Gtr, released on vinyl on the Swedish label Firework Edition.

It’s comprised of four sidelength tracks, and while Buchla wanted to discourage straightup mimicry, while favoring fresh, new sounds, articulating this music with words is difficult without earthly comparisons.

On the album’s first track, drones resemble revving spaceship engines, building power, while ringing tones and pulsing rays interact; squeals alternate between left and right channels in stereo, while the immersive sounds act like an aural pool of

Your Home For The Holidays 24 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

gel serving as a holding tank for medical experimentation from aliens.

The second piece uses abrasive sounds in the background and wavering hums that drift and bend, demonstrating the multitude of notes between the notes of a traditional western scale; at times the piece is even infuriating, with a sci-fi horror soundtrack vibe, resembling the growl of cybernetic wolves.

Part III begins with unusual chirping noises—not exactly from birds or insects—and bouncing sounds evoke the incessant ricocheting of a racquetball game; as the track progresses, it becomes more chaotic and nightmarish, like the noises of irritated ghosts.

The final part uses gentle boops before what sounds like a demon-possessed harmonica enters the scene; ornamental globes scamper and fall down a staircase in an aural cascade, before an artificial tornado provides a compelling episode.

One fear within modernism is that technology erases humanity in some way. This is a pessimistic and unimaginative view; while technology can offer shortcuts for lazy artists, it can also open up possibilities for expression and stimulate creativity, as demonstrated by Courtis’ ear-opening, inventive work.

HEALTH & WELLNESS

Cempa Community Care A

Brooke Brown

Pulse Assistant Editor

“

We pride ourselves on being champions for our community, champions for your health, and we want everyone who walks in this door to know we will be the champion for their cause.”

STAPLE IN THE CHATTANOOGA community for 32 years, Cempa Community Care (formerly known as Chattanooga CARES) started as an education organization founded by five members of the community that worked or volunteered for hospice and saw the ramifications of the AIDS crisis up close.

Since the organization’s inception, many members of the Chattanooga community have dedicated their time, energy, and careers to helping position Cempa as a source of education for locals battling AIDS and HIV. As the organization expanded its service offerings to meet the needs of those in the Chattanooga community—offering both education and treatment for not just HIV and AIDS but also Hepatitis C and other STIs—its team realized a rebrand was in order.

“We wanted to explore who we are, what we stand for, and Cempa is an old English word for Champion,” says CEO Shannon Stephenson. “We pride ourselves on being champions for our community, champions for your health, and we want everyone who walks in this door to know we will be the champion for their cause.”

Their vision will remain to lead the cultural movement to prevent and cure infectious disease with their resources and outreach.

“The biggest impact the community needs to be aware of is that being undetectable is untransmittable,” says CEO Shannon Stephenson. “What that means is if you are HIV positive and you are virally suppressed [taking medicine every single day], your viral load can be ‘undetectable’—which also means that per the CDC’s guidelines, you cannot transmit the virus to others. That’s huge, and a message we really need to get out.”

It’s a common misconception that from the time an individual is diagnosed with HIV, he or she will be capable of infecting others. But with routine care and a commitment to taking prescription medica-

tion every day, that individual’s viral load can become untransmittable.

Cempa is making strides in helping its patients achieve untransmittable status.

Nationally, the average for HIV suppression is between 40 and 60 percent, but Cempa’s average is 91 percent suppression.

“91% of our clients cannot transmit the virus anymore,” Stephenson says. “Obviously we’ve made real accomplishments, but the challenges are far from over.”

An issue Cempa is working hard to resolve is that minority communities are still disproportionately impacted with HIV and STIs. African Americans represent 12 to 13 percent of the nation’s population, and yet they account for over 44 percent of all HIV diagnoses. In Tennessee alone, African Americans account for 16 percent of the population and 56 percent of all HIV diagnoses.

Cempa’s minority outreach manager has been speaking with the Tennessee Black Caucus, and Stephenson herself spoke to the Congressional Black Caucus health task force team in DC, offering a congressional briefing on minority impact and what Cempa is doing to help.

Beyond education and treatment, Cempa offers a unique program—known as the Integrated Care Management Program—made up of team members who are dedicated to staying engaged in their

patients’ health. The program assists with everything from helping patients secure a bus pass to scheduling doctor’s appointments or helping someone who struggles to take their medications.

The program also provides admission for patients into Cempa’s Food Market, which allows access to fresh food, fruits, veggies, and more. Keeping patients healthy is the main goal, and staying engaged is a key factor in achieving that goal.

“We’re at a tipping point where we could cure this virus,” says Stephenson.

“With the undetectable viral loads, combined with prevention medication and PrEP [a daily medication that can reduce your chance of getting HIV by 99%], we could end the HIV and AIDS crisis.”

According to the CDC, STIs are at an all-time high, which is why Cempa offers completely free, and confidential testing for HIV and STIs. They administer what’s known as RAPID testing that delivers results in twenty minutes. If tested positive, they can immediately link you into free treatment, regardless of insurance or lack thereof.

Overall, there is so much more information than can fit into this article. Contact Cempa, visit their office, find your voice through them, and continue the movement to end this crisis with more education, prevention, and outreach.

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • THE PULSE • 25

FILM & TELEVISION

Fighting The Good Fight Again Creed II relives expected glory

TheHOWL.co Chattanooga’s animal advocacy and lifestyle website.

Featuring shelter links; adoptable pets; pet-friendly restaurant and trail reviews written by locals; Vet Talk; gift guide; a community calendar; emergency contacts; and oh, so very much more.

Looking for something petrelated in Chattanooga?

Don’t Google it.

Howl it. info@thehowl.co 26 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

A

S I’VE MENTIONED MANY TIMES OVER THE COURSE of my tenure at The Pulse, there are no new stories. Everything that can be told has been told. There are new shades, new angles, new perspectives, but all stories are repetitions of common genre tropes.

By John DeVore Pulse Film Editor As a people, humans need this repetition. Pattern recognition is key to human evolution and advancement— stories are no different. They provide comfort, teach lessons, bind groups together, and create shared goals and enemies, and allow us to relate to each other through a universally shared storytelling practice.

So, when a film is a repetition of

themes or motifs, it’s important not to dismiss them out of hand. Details may be different. Point of view may shift.

Endings may still surprise, especially if the storytelling is interested in subverting expectations. Always approach a film on its own merits and look for the craft of storytelling.

Sometimes, though, you have to watch a Rocky movie. Currently, there are eight movies involving the underdog from Philly. The first film was a wonderful tale about the triumph of the human spirit.

So was the second. And the third. The fourth was about the triumph of the human spirit in the face of Communism.

The fifth was about human spirit and street fighting and neglecting your children. The sixth was about human spirit in the face of growing old (to be fair, though, I really loved Rocky Balboa).

Then, in a combo breaker, the series shifted. With Creed, the series turned to the son of Rocky’s former adversary and friend Apollo, a young man wanting to make a name for himself in spite of his father.

It had the human spirit thing too, but it was different enough to be interesting while still hitting all the right beats. Creed II hits the same notes, without much deviation, making it a very Rocky sequel.

After his defeat by split decision

by Pretty Ricky Conlan in the first film, Adonis Creed Johnson (Michael B. Jordan) is well on his way to being the heavyweight champion. With Rocky by his side, Creed wins the title from an aging former star and begins the life as defending champ.

This attracts the attention of yet another weaselly boxing promoter who has had his eye on a fighter across the Atlantic Ocean: Viktor Drago (Florian Munteanu), son of

“

The film series continues to say the same thing over and over again. This doesn’t make the film bad, simply predictable.” former Soviet boxer Ivan Drago (Dolf Lundgren), who famously killed Apollo Creed in the ring.

Drago has his father’s size and power, as well as a record strong enough to fight for the belt. There is built in drama, of course, with each boxer having such a famous father. Creed wants the fight; Rocky doesn’t. The two part ways in disagreement, with Donnie finding a new trainer in order for these titans of the ring to clash.

There are other things that happen outside the ring—an engagement, a new baby, a damaged relationship, a long lost son. These are common elements to the Rocky saga, which has never been about just boxing.

But the film series continues to say the same thing over and over again. This doesn’t make the film bad, simply predictable.

The elements that made Creed work so well are present again, but there will always be diminishing returns. This isn’t to say the

film doesn’t stretch beyond itself.

In particular, the humanization of Ivan and Viktor Drago was excellent. I would have preferred to see more of that story.

In fact, I would have preferred to have left the Creeds and the Balboas out of the film almost entirely and focused on the downfall of the Ukrainian fighter and his struggle to rise again. That would have been a fascinating Rocky film.

But then who would wear the star spangled shorts?

Creed II is the sequel Creed was always going to get. It’s not bad, it’s not great, it is exactly what is supposed to be. The audience is looking for struggle, for training montages, for a final fight to “Gotta Fly Now” and a come from behind victory. Director Steven Caple Jr. gives them exactly that.

Anyone who wants to see a Rocky movie will get what they wanted from Creed II. It’s comfortable and comfort is all audiences should expect.

✴ NEW IN THEATERS ✴

Anna and the Apocalypse A zombie apocalypse threatens the sleepy town of Little Haven—at Christmas—forcing Anna and her friends to fight, slash and sing their way to survival, as best they can.

Director: John McPhail Stars: Ella Hunt, Malcolm Cumming

The Possession of Hannah Grace When a cop who is just out of rehab takes the graveyard shift in a city hospital morgue, she faces a series of bizarre, violent events caused by an evil entity in one of the corpses.

Director: Diederik Van Rooijen Stars: Shay Mitchell, Grey Damon, Nick Thune

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • THE PULSE • 27

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY and big-hearted as you take inventory of your ability to follow through on your promises to yourself. If people are quizzical about how much attention you’re giving yourself as you take stock, inform them that your astrologer has told you that December is Love Yourself Better Month.

ROB BREZSNY SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Blackjack is a card game popular in gambling casinos. In the eternal struggle to improve the odds of winning big money, some blackjack players work in teams. One teammate secretly counts the cards as they’re dealt and assesses what cards are likely to come up next. Another teammate gets subtle signals from his card-counting buddy and makes the bets. A casino in Windsor, Ontario pressed charges against one blackjack team, complaining that this tactic was deceptive and dishonest. But the court decided in the team’s favor, ruling that the players weren’t cheating but simply using smart strategy. In the spirit of these blackjack teams, Sagittarius, and in accordance with astrological omens, I urge you to better your odds in a “game” of your choice by using strategy that is almost as good as cheating but isn’t actually cheating.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): What has become of the metaphorical seeds you planted during the weeks after your last birthday? Have your intentions flourished? Have your dreams blossomed? Have your talents matured? Have your naive questions evolved into more penetrating questions? Be honest and kind as you answer these inquiries. Be thoughtful

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): If you want to play the drinking game called Possum, you and your friends climb up into a tree with a case of beer and start drinking. As time goes by, people get so hammered they fall out of the tree.

The winner is the last one left in the tree. I hope you won’t engage in this form of recreation anytime soon—nor in any other activity that even vaguely resembles it. The coming weeks should be a time of calling on favors, claiming your rewards, collecting your blessings, and graduating to the next level. I trust your policy will be: no trivial pursuits, no wasted efforts, no silly stunts.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In his song “Happy Talk,” Academy Awardwinning lyricist Oscar Hammerstein II offered this advice: “You gotta have a dream. If you don’t have a dream, how you gonna have a dream come true?”

Where do you stand in this regard, Pisces? Do you in fact have a vivid, clearly defined dream? And have you developed a strategy for making that dream come true? The coming weeks will be an excellent time to home in on what you really want and hone your scheme for manifesting it. (P.S. Keep in mind Antoine de Saint-Exupéry’s idea: “A goal without a plan is just a wish.”)

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Every year the bird known as the Arctic tern experiences two summers and enjoys more daylight than any other animal.

That’s because it regularly makes a long-distance journey from the Arctic to the Antarctic and back again. Let’s designate this hardy traveler as your inspirational creature for the next

28 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

Homework: Hug yourself as you tell yourself your biggest secret. eleven months. May it help animate you to experiment with brave jaunts that broaden and deepen your views of the world. I don’t necessarily mean you should literally do the equivalent of circumnavigating the planet. Your expansive adventures might take place mostly in inner realms or closer to home.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): When the American Civil War began in 1861, the United States fractured. Four years later, the union was technically restored when the northern states defeated the southern states. At that time, African American slavery became illegal everywhere for the first time since the country’s birth decades earlier. But there was a catch. The southern states soon enacted laws that mandated racial segregation and ensured that African Americans continued to suffer systematic disadvantages. Is there a comparable issue in your personal life? Did you at sometime in the past try to fix an untenable situation only to have it sneak back in a less severe but still debilitating form? The coming weeks will be an excellent time to finish the reforms; to enforce a thorough and permanent correction.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Does an elusive giant creature with a long neck inhabit the waters of Loch Ness in northern Scotland? Alleged sightings have been reported since 1933. Most scientists dismiss the possibility that “Nessie” actually exists, but there are photos, films, and videos that provide tantalizing evidence. A governmentfunded Scottish organization has prepared contingency plans just in case the beast does make an unambiguous appearance. In that spirit, and in accordance with astrological omens, I

recommend that you prepare yourself for the arrival in your life of intriguing anomalies and fun mysteries.

Like Nessie, they’re nothing to worry about, but you’ll be better able to deal gracefully with them if you’re not totally taken by surprise.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Does moss really “eat” rocks, as Cancerian author Elizabeth Gilbert attests in her novel The Signature of All Things? Marine chemist Martin Johnson says yes.

Moss really does break down and release elements in solid stone. Gilbert adds, “Given enough time, a colony of moss can turn a cliff into gravel, and turn that gravel into topsoil.” Furthermore, this hardy plant can grow virtually everywhere: in the tropics and frozen wastes, on tree bark and roofing slate, on sloth fur and snail shells. I propose that we make moss your personal symbol of power for now, Cancerian. Be as indomitable, resourceful, and resilient as moss.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Let’s shout out a big “THANKS!” and “HALLELUJAH!” to the enzymes in our bodies. These catalytic proteins do an amazing job of converting the food we eat into available energy. Without them, our cells would take forever to turn any particular meal into the power we need to walk, talk, and think. I bring this marvel to your attention, Leo, because now is a favorable time to look for and locate metaphorical equivalents of enzymes: influences and resources that will aid and expedite your ability to live the life you want to live.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Every dreamer knows that it is entirely possible to be homesick for a place you’ve never been to, perhaps more homesick

than for familiar ground,” writes author Judith Thurman. I’m guessing you will experience this feeling in the coming weeks. What does it mean if you do?

It may be your deep psyche’s way of nudging you to find an energizing new sanctuary. Or perhaps it means you should search for fresh ways to feel peaceful and well-grounded.

Maybe it’s a prod to push you outside your existing comfort zone so you can expand your comfort zone.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Venice, Italy consists of 118 small islands that rise from a shallow lagoon. A network of 443 bridges keeps them all connected.

But Venice isn’t the world champion of bridges. The American city of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania holds that title, with 446. I nominate these two places to be your inspirational symbols in the coming weeks. It’s time for you build new metaphorical bridges and take good care of your existing metaphorical bridges.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): To aid and support your navigation through this pragmatic phase of your astrological cycle, I have gathered counsel from three productive pragmatists.

First is author Helen Keller. She said she wanted to accomplish great and noble things, but her “chief duty” was “to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble.” Second, author George Orwell believed that “to see what is in front of one’s nose” requires never-ending diligence. Finally, author Pearl S. Buck testified that she didn’t wait around until she was in the right mood before beginning her work. Instead, she invoked her willpower to summon the necessary motivation.

Rob Brezsny is an aspiring master of curiosity, perpetrator of sacred uproar, and founder of the Beauty and Truth Lab. He brings a literate, myth-savvy perspective to his work.

It’s all in the stars.

JONESIN' CROSSWORD

“Talk Like the Critters”—”pet names” popularized by memes.

ACROSS 1 Prosciutto, for example 4 Arizona plants 9 Beginning 14 Suffix after pay or Motor 15 Verbally 16 “Today” weatherman Al 17 Oscar Wilde’s forte 18 1990 Mel Gibson movie, according to the Internet?

20 “Metamorphosis” poet 22 Bottled water brand owned by Coca-Cola 23 Mount McKinley’s national park 26 Pay no attention to 30 Easy swimming style, according to the Internet?

34 “Night Gallery” host Serling 35 Architect and Bauhaus School founder Walter 36 University official 37 Competed at Daytona 40 Istanbul title 41 “Better in Time” singer ___ Lewis

42 Olfactory stimulus 43 William and Harry, e.g.

45 Fleetwood ___ 46 Pet-related YouTube clip, according to the Internet?

50 Receipt figure 52 Half a quarter 53 Falco’s request to Amadeus, in a 1980s hit 57 Salt, chemically 58 Person who musically hypnotizes animals, according to the Internet?

63 Letter after pi 64 Actor Rami of “Bohemian Rhapsody” 65 Job reward 66 ___ voto (“at my own wish,” in Latin) 67 “___ Kitchen” (Gordon Ramsay show) 68 Tenochtitlan inhabitant 69 Request permission DOWN 1 “Strange ...”

2 Hyphenated word in “Cockles and Mussels” 3 Kind of call or season 4 One way to get

around town 5 “Green Book” star Mahershala 6 Electrical cable 7 Brass band instrument 8 Altar vows 9 Color of Philadelphia Flyers mascot Gritty 10 Like hopeless situations 11 Take to the slopes 12 Ending for mountain or auction 13 Three, in Torino 19 They should be nowhere near a chalkboard 21 Macbeth’s imagined weapon 24 “Little ___ Fauntleroy” 25 Google’s was in Aug. 2004 27 Cookie introduced to India in 2011 28 Horse with mottled coloring 29 Mode in “The Incredibles” 31 No longer linked 32 1 or 0, but not 10 33 ___ Reade (NYC

drugstore chain) 36 Pattern 37 Tomato variety 38 Driver who plays Kylo Ren 39 2017 Pixar film 41 Pants maker Strauss 43 Sales talk 44 Guevara on T-shirts 46 What opportunity does, hopefully 47 “___ & Greg” (1990s-2000s sitcom) 48 Scratches the surface?

49 “Check this out!”

51 “Family Matters” neighbor Steve 54 Former “American Idol” judge DioGuardi 55 “Waiting For My Rocket to Come” singer Jason 56 Give forth 58 “I can’t believe this,” in online slang 59 Scottish “no” 60 12th letter of the alphabet 61 Language suffix 62 DVR remote button

Copyright © 2018 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents perminute. Must be 18+ to call. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle No. 912 CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • THE PULSE • 29

COLUMN · ON THE BEAT

Tears For Fears: San Ysidro Edition Office Alex watches the news and has some teary thoughts

“O Alex Teach

Pulse columnist

“

There’s no ‘beer summit’ for that kind of thing man," I said, leaning in. “You wanna get prosecuted, man? Because that’s how you get prosecuted.”

When officer Alexander D. Teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he spends his spare time volunteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center.

H YEAH, HE REALLY GOT under that one,” I said while watching the news from a table in a local Chili’s with a few of my co-workers. Lunchtime is a real thing to cops, and we needed the break.

Radios were on, but we were tuned out it’s safe to say.

“Whaddya mean?” Ortega responded. “He didn’t even come close.”

“Look at the spread he got! Really made best use of the wind. Most guys just shoot straight in but a lateral shot creates a curtain, you know? Not some little cloud.”

“Yeah,” Ortega continued, “but he didn’t hit anyone with it.”

I’d tried to ignore him, but it wasn’t going to last. He was talking about pegging someone with the actual CS gas round, which of course was verboten in our line of work, but ‘Tega had this bizarre knack for making contact with the bad guys when we had to pop smoke into a house.

It wasn’t intentional on his part; the very first time he was handed the launcher he fired it through a small second story bathroom window with a curtain—he couldn’t have seen that’s where the guy was hiding—and next thing you know, the angry ginger that had barricaded himself inside his house after treating his wife to an especially aggravated beating was stumbling out dripping snot, his eyes squeezed shut, and awkwardly trying to simultaneously reach over his shoulder and around his back at the same time to touch the place that was going to soon be hosting a most spectacular bruise.

We were astonished, and ‘Tega drank for free that night I can tell you.

Since then? It’s just been a gift he has that others very much don’t want to

30 • THE PULSE • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

share. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s the ultimate bill to hand to someone for playing an extremely stupid games and I’d be lying if I said it didn’t make me laugh (bless their hearts), but it’s not a report I’d like to have to write.

“Yeah, that’s what he should have done. He should have fired a canister into an immigrant’s bean on national television,” I said sarcastically.

“There’s no ‘beer summit’ for that kind of thing man," I said, leaning in.

“You wanna get prosecuted, man? Because that’s how you get prosecuted.”

He actually got quiet.

“I’m just saying,” he muttered.

Tear gas, formally known as a lachrymator agent or lachrymator (from the Latin lacrima, meaning "tear") as well as my favorite name “mace,” is a chemical weapon that causes severe eye and respiratory pain and skin irritation.

In the eye specifically, it stimulates the nerves of the lacrimal gland to produce tears. Nothing has been more aptly named in my experience, and I’m not just talking about the colloquial name “mace”; I’m referring to the “weapon” part as well, because like waterboarding, if you’ve ever experienced it you’d

agree pretty quickly.

That said, do I consider it appropriate to use on families? Of course not. But when storming the gates to the point that people are impaling themselves on the fences after having passed uniformed officers there to begin the asylum process?

Yeah. There’s a time and place for less-lethal and this definitely qualifies.

Bring your kids to storm the literal gates to a nation, don’t blame the guards for making you all cry. Period.

That’s the thing really. What I like about “mace” doesn’t make me a monster; it makes me a nice guy. A darn nice guy, actually. Let’s just pretend for a moment that you’re not allowed to break the law (bear with me), and that I am tasked with preventing you from doing so: Do you want me to stop you with my hands or my gun…? Or juice that makes you cry? ‘Zackly.

It’s a tough world out there, but cause and effect is a real thing. Speaking of which? “Quit moping, brother. Here, have some more salsa.”

But alas…Officer Edwin Ortega would eat no more. Unless, perhaps, he’d like some mace on his nachos? Ah-HAH!

CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM • NOVEMBER 29, 2018 • THE PULSE • 31