The Pulse - Vol. 6, Issue 44

Cover Story

Boo-Tacular!

Arts & Entertainment

The Art of Play Music

A Horror Story Film

Belgian Mobs?

Plus Halloween Events, Cops & Costumes, Swine Flu Hysteria FREE • News, Views, Arts & Entertainment • October 29, 2009 • Vol. 6 - Issue 44 • www.chattanoogapulse.com • pulse news 95.3 WPLZ

CONTENTS T H E P U L S E • C H AT TA N O O G A , T E N N E S S E E • O C T O B E R 2 9 , 2 0 0 9 • V O L U M E 6 , I S S U E 4 4

cover story

page 12

NEWS & VIEWS 6 BEYOND THE HEADLINES 8 SHRINK RAP 11 LIFE IN THE NOOG

19 SHADES OF GREEN 30 ON THE BEAT

ARTS & FEATURES 16 ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT By Michael Crumb Artists Christine Gray and Johnston Foster have mounted an inspirational show at UTC’s Cress Gallery. An enthusiastic reception to their works attests to folks’ recognition of these artists’ intense drives to produce work that is both playful and relevant to deep aesthetic concerns.

21 FILM FEATURE

By Phillip Johnston The Carmike Bijou will close its doors at the end of this week and Chattanooga will say hello to the beautiful new 12-screen Majestic next door. The Majestic is the nation’s first LEED-certified “green” cinema and includes a VIP theater and Ovation Room complete with gourmet food and electronic reclining chairs.

23 TABLE SERVICE By Rebecca Cruz Let’s get one thing straight up front…Cheeburger Cheeburger is nothing like the restaurant John Belushi ran in one of the funniest Saturday Night Live skits ever, where, regardless of what his customers requested, all Belushi ever offered was a “cheeboiger, cheeboiger, no Coke. Pepsi!”

24 MUSICAL FEATURE

By Hellcat As I find myself attending many of Chattanooga’s music venues to satiate my need for rock and roll, I can’t help but notice something that sends chills up my spine and makes the little hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. It’s the attendance.

Cover illustration by Simon Oxley

CSO PULLS OUT THE SCARY STOPS

By Phillip Johnston Halloween Night is sneaking up on us, and downtown Chattanooga will be buzzing with many a costume party and themed event. Given the times, we can probably expect a handful of friendly (and not-sofriendly) vampires, a smattering of Wild Things, and even a handful of Jokers left over from last year.

4 EDITOON 4 LETTERS TO THE EDITOR 5 PULSE BEATS 5 CITY COUNCILSCOPE 6 THE LIST 7 POLICE BLOTTER 14 SPIRITS WITHIN

17 20 22 22 25 26 28

A&E CALENDAR NEW IN THEATERS FREE WILL ASTROLOGY JONESIN’ CROSSWORD MUSIC CALENDAR NEW MUSIC REVIEWS HALLOWEEN EVENTS

The entire contents of this publication are copyrighted and property of Brewer Media Group.

No part of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the express written consent of the publishers. The Pulse utilizes freelance writers and the views expressed within this publication are not necessarily the views of the publishers or editors. The Pulse takes no responsibility for unsolicited manuscripts, photographs, artwork or other materials.

The

Editoon

by Rick Baldwin

Publisher Zachary Cooper zcooper@chattanoogapulse.com Contributing Editor Janis Hashe jhashe@chattanoogapulse.com News Editor Gary Poole gpoole@chattanoogapulse.com Calendar Editor Kathryn Dunn Advertising Sales Leslie Dotson Rick Leavell Leif Sawyer Townes Webb Contributing Writers Gustavo Arellano Rob Brezsny Elizabeth Crenshaw Chuck Crowder Michael Crumb Rebecca Cruz Hellcat Joshua Hurley Stuart James Phillip Johnston Matt Jones Ernie Paik Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D. Alex Teach

Letters to the Editor

Editorial Intern Tara Morris

instead of looking out for the region as a whole. The time has come for Chattanooga and Hamilton County to grow up. The question is will some politicians be willing (or even able) to pull their heads out of the sand long enough to see this fact.

Tyler Curtis

Art Director Kelly Lockhart Art Department Sharon Chambers Kathryn Dunn Damien Power Staff Photographer Damien Power Editorial Cartoonist Rick Baldwin Contact Info: Phone (423) 648-7857 Fax (423) 648-7860 E-mail info@chattanoogapulse.com Calendar Submissions calendar@chattanoogapulse.com Advertising advertising@chattanoogapulse.com The Pulse is published weekly and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publishers may take more than one copy per weekly issue. The Pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors.

The Pulse is published by

1305 Carter Street Chattanooga, Tennessee 37402 phone (423) 648-7857 fax (423) 648-7860 Letters to the editor must include name, address and daytime phone number for verification. The Pulse reserves the right to edit letters for space and clarity. Please keep letters within 500 words in length.

The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on culture, the arts, entertainment and local news.

Member

Metro Government It has been apparent for many years that in order for Chattanooga to keep pace with other cities in the region that we’ll need more streamlined and effective government. The current hodgepodge of cities and county government is a detriment to growth, which is why even though the powers-that-be in county government may be against the tide, Chattanooga Mayor Ron Littlefield is correct in calling for metro government. We have far too many chiefs greedily protecting their little pieces of pie

Native American Environmentalism The indigenous peoples of North America” practiced conservation?

Obviously they made less dent on the land than us white folks, and produced less stuff, but North America used to have some interesting animals that disappeared between the arrival of the “indigenous peoples” and the arrival of the white guys. And I think SOME of the “indigenous” would drive a herd of buffalo over a cliff, cut out their tongues, and leave the rest to rot. (Biodegradable, I guess.) Some of the indigenous would display their riches by destroying them: you can run your Ford over a cliff, but I can run my Cadillac, so to speak. The Aztecs practiced human sacrifice en masse. By all means take note of the Indians’ good points, but, like us, they could have been better stewards of God’s creation.

Andrew Lohr

Neither “For” Nor “Against” By over-using and ill-defining terms we thwart the very goals we wish to achieve. It seems many people think, by virtue of their political belief system, that they either have to be “for” or “against” taking care of the planet. And I’m not talking radical things here, just common sense things like not throwing out trash, etc. It’s been convoluted and therefore has lost credibility with many people.

I’ve seen kids (and adults) make fun of people who even mention cleaning up things, and that’s sad.

Dana Fly Officer Kenneth Freeman & Real Discrimination There are two broad types of police officers. One is the concerned citizen that is doing their part to make this world a better, safer place. The other is the schoolyard bully that is just in it for the power trip that gives the first types a bad name. Three guesses which one this guy is. Kenneth, it’s not because you’re black or white or Hispanic or anything else. It’s because you’re a bully that does not deserve to wear the badge, or be put in charge of anything more important than a drive-through window.

Chris Edymnion

Send all letters to the editor and questions to info@chattanoogapulse.com We reserve the right to edit letters for content and space. Please include your full name, city and contact information.

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Pulse Beats

Quote Of The Week: A rundown of the newsy, the notable, and the notorious...

“If choosing road repair over public art means some city officials ‘lack creative and aesthetic awareness,’ then count me in.”

—City Councilmember Deborah Scott, responding to a recent debate over mandatory city budgeting for public art.

’Tis The Season For The Swine Flu

By Gary Poole This past Friday, President Obama declared the current outbreak of the H1N1 Swine Flu to be a “national emergency”. This gives his health chief the power to let hospitals move emergency rooms offsite to speed treatment and protect noninfected patients.

So far, according to officials with Atlanta’s Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, more than 1,000 people in the United States, including almost 100 children, have died from H1N1 flu virus, and 46 states have widespread flu activity.

State Health Commissioner Susan Cooper welcomed the declaration, calling the announcement a proactive step in preparing for a potential increase in illness and facility demands related to H1N1 flu. “This virus is spreading rapidly, and there is the potential for healthcare systems to become overburdened,” she added.

Compounding the problems has been a very slow distribution of the vaccine, available in both nasal and injectable form. Dr. Valerie Boaz with the Chattanooga-Hamilton County Health Department said the appointments for their recent shipment of 1,300 doses of the injectable vaccine were booked almost as soon as it was announced.

However, she said there are still plenty of the FluMist vaccine doses available.

So far, only 11 million doses have gone out to health departments, doctors’ offices and other providers, less than ten percent of the original promise of 120 million doses that were supposed to be distributed by mid-October. The government now hopes to have about 50 million doses of swine flu vaccine out by mid-November and 150 million in December. The flu virus has to be grown in chicken eggs, and the yield hasn’t been as high as was initially hoped.

Another twist to the flu story has been a backlash among a sizeable percentage of parents who are unwilling to get their children inoculated. A recent poll by ABC News and the Washington Post showed that nearly 40 percent of parents were afraid of potential side effects and had decided not to get their children vaccinated. Adding to concerns are several national talkshow hosts who have suggested that the H1N1 flu vaccine may be unsafe

Here are some of the interesting agenda items set to be discussed at the November 3 meeting of the Chattanooga City Council.

VI. Ordinances – First Reading:

a) An ordinance adopting a Plan of Services and extending the corporate limits of the City of Chattanooga, Tennessee, to annex certain territory contiguous to the present corporate limits of the City of Chattanooga known as area 3C, which includes certain properties adjacent to Ruby Falls and the U.S. Park Service Land Resource Division, on the side of Lookout Mountain, within the Urban Growth Boundary of the City of Chattanooga, in Hamilton County, Tennessee, as shown by the attached map.

and questioned the Obama administration’s recommendation that Americans get vaccinated. Rush Limbaugh even went as far as to assert that “you’ll be healthier” if you don’t believe what the government says.

This type of fear-mongering upsets CDC chief Thomas Frieden, who stated very clearly that the vaccine is safe and was not “rushed” into production. “This flu vaccine is made as flu vaccine is made each year, by the same companies, in the same production facilities, with the same procedures, with

the same safety safeguards,” he said.

“That enables us to have a high degree of confidence in the safety of the vaccine.”

The simple fact is that while the vaccine has been delayed (someone in government almost literally counted the chicken eggs before they were laid), every reliable scientific report shows that the vaccine is safe and effective. The only question is: Will enough people get the vaccine in time to keep the pandemic from causing more deaths than would otherwise have been prevented?

Pondering The Passage It’s been closed since February 2008, but The Passage—one of the jewels in the crown of the riverfront renaissance—will reopen “in November”, according to TWH Architects, the firm contracted to design and oversee repairs.

The popular attraction was found to have improperly grounded electrical wiring, falling tiles and water seepage, leading to its closure and $1.25 million in repairs.

Questions (and lawsuits) remain about the lack of oversight that allowed what appears to be shoddy original construction—now being paid for out of taxpayers’ pockets. Yet another, major question, raised at the time of the closure, still generates controversy: Should The Passage, originally designed and intended as a tribute to The Trail of Tears and the tragedy of the Cherokee, be used as a water park? —Janis Hashe

b) An ordinance adopting a Plan of Services and extending the corporate limits of the City of Chattanooga, Tennessee, to annex certain territory contiguous to the present corporate limits of the City of Chattanooga known as area 6A, which includes certain properties adjacent to the western right-of-way of Highway 58 and Turkeyfoot Road within the Urban Growth Boundary of the City of Chattanooga, in Hamilton County, Tennessee, as shown by the attached map. c) An ordinance adopting a Plan of Services and extending the corporate limits of the City of Chattanooga, Tennessee, to annex certain territory contiguous to the present corporate limits of the City of Chattanooga known as area 6B, which includes certain properties adjacent to the western right-of-way of Highway 58 and adjacent to the right-of-way for Hickory Valley Road within the Urban Growth Boundary of the City of Chattanooga, in Hamilton County, Tennessee, as shown by the attached map.

Train keeps a’rollin all night long…

The Chattanooga City Council meets each Tuesday at 6 p.m. in the City Council Building at 1000 Lindsay St. For more information on the agendas, visit www.Chattanooga.gov/City_ Council/110_Agenda.asp

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Beyond The Headlines

Lie, Falcon, Lie

By Stuart James

Healthy Halloween Trick-Or-Treating 1. The smaller, the better. Buy only “fun size” or better yet, “mini.”

2. Select candy that offers sugarfree options.

3. Buy value packs of sugarless gum.

4. Buy the handy portion-control craze and hand out 100-calorie packs of snacks (look for fun Halloween designs).

5. Pretzels are always a favorite, especially when small bags are designed for Halloween.

6. Stock up on 100 percent fruit chews or fruit “leathers”. Dried pineapple rings (unsweetened) are super sweet and chewy—very satisfying.

7. Avoid the candy corn—it stays in molars and causes dental havoc.

8. Learn to like dark chocolate. It’s healthy and has less sugar.

Halloween is one of the favorite holidays for all children. The reason is simple: free candy!

But, as a responsible parent trying to help keep your kids from joining in the growing youth obesity epidemic, there are ways to keep trick-or-treating healthier.

Sure, your kids may not like getting sugar-free treats or other things from the above list, but candy is still candy.

Chances are they aren’t going to throw them away just because they aren’t the super-sweet sugarfilled candies we had back in our childhood.

The other thing you can do (and really should do) is to go through the haul your little costumed kid collected on his or her rounds of the neighborhood or mall. Not just to check for safety reasons, but to clear out the really bad stuff. One excellent parenting tip is to have a stash of “good” candy on hand to trade out for the treats you take from the bag.

F

alcon Heene, in a television appearance, revealed the truth about his “Balloon Boy” adventure. It was a hoax orchestrated by his parents with a single purpose—for the show.

Richard Heene, Falcon’s father, created a hoax, telling the world his son floated off in a flying saucer balloon. He created this hoax because he wanted a reality TV show—so he used his son to create a lie, a lie designed to get the publicity Mr. Heene needs for fame and fortune.

After “Balloon Boy’s” adventure ended, the Heene family appeared on Larry King Live. During the interview, Wolf Blitzer asked Mr. Heene about Falcon’s disappearance.

Blitzer queried, “Did he [Falcon] hear you screaming out, ‘Falcon, Falcon…’” Mr. Heene turned to his son and said, “He’s asking you, Falcon. Did you hear us calling your name any time?” Falcon responded affirmatively. Mr. Heene then said, “You did?” Mrs. Heene also added, “You did?”

Mr. Heene then asked Falcon, “Why didn’t you come out?” Falcon paused, and then said, “You had said that, um, we did this for the show.” Falcon revealed the hoax and the motivation was clear—the “Balloon Boy” adventure is “for the show.” The Heenes wanted that extra “it” factor to launch a reality TV show.

The Heenes now face potential criminal charges, so they hired lawyers.

Mr. Heene’s lawyer is making the rounds on the talk shows saying, “The Heenes are more than willing to voluntarily turn themselves in to face any charges which may be filed against them. I have sent... this message in an effort to avoid the public spectacle and humiliation of having the police publicly arrest two people who are presumed innocent, perhaps even in the presence of their children.”

Public spectacle?

The public spectacle is ongoing; parents using their child in a hoax, a hoax that brings national attention to the “Balloon Boy’s” flight, a flight that never takes place. The Heenes purposefully created a public spectacle, using their children as pawns for self-gain.

The truth is the Heenes want the public spectacle of the potential arrest. They want the attention, because the Heenes know that a plea deal may result in no jail time,

“They want the attention, because the Heenes know that a plea deal may result in no jail time, they know that the state might not take their children from them, and they know that their hoax generated public attention. ”

they know that the state might not take their children from them, and they know that their hoax generated public attention. Mr. and Mrs. Heene do not care how this impacts their children. They are willing to publically display the good, the bad and the ugly. It is all for the show.

In the end, the Heenes will attempt to negotiate a reality show.

They are seeking to benefit from their 30 seconds of fame—they want to join the ranks of reality TV shows like John and Kate Plus 8. Who cares about the kids, or the public spectacle—it is all for the show.

If the Heenes get a show, they should call it “Fly, Falcon, Fly— Learning How to Lie.” For a profit.

For the show.

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A weekly roundup of the newsworthy, notable and often head-scratching stories gleaned from police reports from the Chattanooga Police Department, the Hamilton County Sheriff’s Office, the Bradley County Sheriff’s Department and the Dalton Police Department.

• It is often what is not included in a police report that makes the entire report more interesting. An OoltewahGeorgetown Road resident came home around lunchtime last week, which apparently was a bit of a surprise to the young man who was inside the house. Said young man was not supposed to be there, and in fact was interrupted while attempting to burgle the residence. Where the report gets a bit more interesting is the part that reads the homeowner held the suspect there while dialing 911 and waiting for deputies to respond. No word on exactly how he held the suspect, but whatever method he used obviously worked, as the young man was taken into custody by officers and then taken to jail.

• One of the things officers are taught during training is that the vast majority of criminals are engaged in more than one crime. A case in point happened last week in Bradley County when a tip about a marijuana-growing operation led directly to the recovery of several thousand dollars worth of stolen goods and two arrests. Deputies served the marijuana search warrant

on two brothers staying at a house on Red Clay Road, and during the course of questioning them, discovered a veritable cornucopia of stolen property.

The goods in question were apparently stolen from the father of the boys. According to deputies, they also gave information about nearly 30 thefts from construction sites in the Ooltewah area. A good day’s work for law enforcement.

• Though we thought everyone in the entire country would have realized this by now, we’d like to remind everyone that no, you cannot take a handgun on an airplane. We feel this reminder is necessary after a Dalton man was stopped trying to go through a security checkpoint at the Chattanooga Metropolitan Airport with a weapon in his carry-on bag. TSA officials spotted the outline of the gun during routine xrays, and when they searched the bag, found a Glock handgun along with nine rounds of ammunition. The clueless gunslinger has been charged with violation of airport security and will go before General Sessions Court on November 4.

• Last month there was a lot of debate about police officers taking their cars home and using them for second jobs.

Chattanooga Street Scenes

Maybe some of the opponents of the policy will change their mind after an officer working a second job was able to make a traffic stop on a suspicious vehicle, leading to the arrest of three young men who had definitely been up to no good. Officer Brian Wood was working at Hamilton Place Mall when he was alerted to three suspicious men leaving the area. He pulled them over in a nearby parking lot where, after spotting a handgun in the car, he was forced to taser one of the suspects who tried to fight him. Recovered from the vehicle were a number of stolen items including cell phones, GPS units and prescription medication. The three were arrested and are also being questioned about a string of recent auto burglaries in the area.

Photography by Damien Power

The first signs of fall at the Chattanooga Theatre Center.

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Shrink Rap

Surviving Or Becoming?

By Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D www.DrRPH.com

“G

o out into the world today and love the people you meet.” That was said by Mother Teresa, and is one of my favorite quotes.

It’s also one of the hardest philosophies to practice on a daily basis. Love everyone…seriously?

Including your partner’s racist, bigoted uncle? And the mean woman across the street who complains if your yard needs mowing? And that brat who rides his bicycle over your monkey grass? Really? I gotta love them?

You might wonder: What’s the point? They certainly don’t love me.

And of course you might be quite right. Maybe their actions have you reacting to them in, let’s say, unlovable ways. So, you find that you’re pretty mean yourself, at least toward them.

Or you become intolerant of the intolerant bigot. Maybe you ride your metaphoric bicycle over their gardens, too, by how you think, feel, and act toward them in response to who they are. Now we have their behavior influencing your behavior, until the whole thing becomes a tango of animosity and resentment.

Well, that certainly won’t get us anywhere.

I saw a poster recently that said, “She didn’t just survive, she became.” What I love about this is the fact that we are all—every single

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one of us—survivors of something.

Maybe it’s cancer. Or child abuse.

Perhaps you’ve survived a divorce or particularly painful break-up. Maybe right now you’re surviving some family dysfunction, and can’t seem to find a way to navigate through it.

Maybe you’ve survived bottoming out with alcoholism or drug addiction, and are on the road to recovery. Or you’re in the midst of grieving over the recent death of a loved one. Every wonder what your partner is surviving, being partnered to you? A short temper…grouchiness in the mornings… financial problems.

Some of these might seem like small matters, and others more like large, life-altering issues. But they all share the same theme: They tell of a situation, event, or relationship that had to be survived.

Now let’s take this a step further.

What happened to you when you survived your problem? Did it make you bitter, increase the acid in your stomach and alter your outlook on other people, on life? Was a seed of prejudice planted because you viewed the problem as the result of another group of people, a group you don’t understand and therefore fear? Are you feeling emotionally battered, with nothing left to give?

Or did something else happen: Do you feel a humble wisdom, a sense that you’ve grown from the difficulties and emerged, not necessarily unscathed, but somehow better for it?

There is a Chinese character that says, “In adversity lies opportunity.”

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Did you discover an opportunity to become a better person for the adversity you survived?

The question becomes, did you survive? Or beyond that, did you become someone stronger, enriched, perhaps someone who’s now more understanding of others?

I’ve heard it said that harsh reality is a window to sweet liberation.

So who have you become? Are you liberated now, freed from hatred toward that racist, bigoted uncle? You know, maybe he suffered physical abuse as a child, or poverty, or really bad parenting. Are you freed from feeling meanness in your heart toward that mean neighbor? Perhaps she was beaten by her husband of 30 years.

Maybe she’s suffering a disease. Or maybe she’s just mean. So what?

That’s her karma, not yours. Are you liberated from impatience with the kids who still have some important lessons to learn about respect for others?

Teach them. Don’t bite when a bark will do.

Go out into the world. Today. And love the people you meet. Well, at the very least, realize that they, too, are trying to survive something, and are in the process of becoming someone new. Kindness is never wasted. You never know…they may become a future friend, or lover. Or, because of your kindness, they may simply become someone who’s going to pay it forward.

Dr. Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D., is a psychotherapist, minister, and educator, in private practice in Chattanooga, and is the author of “Empowering the Tribe” and “The Power of a Partner.”

“There is a Chinese character that says, ‘In adversity lies opportunity.’

Did you discover an opportunity to become a better person for the adversity you survived?”

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Life In The Noog

Will You Bring Me Back A Beer?

By Chuck Crowder

R

ecently the city council smiled at a proposal to allow beer sales in the lobbies of the flailing Tivoli Theater and Memorial Auditorium during concert events to boost revenues and alleviate some of the tax money it takes to maintain these city-owned facilities.

Seems that up to now the fact that both of these venues have received major facelifts since the last time Ted Nugent swung from the rafters, combined with the limited resources assigned to cleaning up the “wango tango” left behind, has those in charge a little paranoid about spilling anything on the new carpet.

However, concession sales are what drives events to (or from) a potential stop on any tour. Ticket sales generally don’t make up all of the cost of putting on an event. So if the venue (in this case, the city), promoters and performers want to profit from the show, they have to rely on extra money generated from concession sales (and t-shirts of course).

At times, Memorial and the Tivoli have given in a little and allowed concessions to be sold—and consumed—within the confines of the lobby areas (anything can be neatly mopped up from a marble floor).

However, they wouldn’t allow food or drink in the seating area—where visitors are located 99.1 percent of the time.

Maybe they recall the same days

I do. I remember when you could not only plop down in your seat at Memorial Auditorium with a chili dog and cold beer, but the first thing you smelled when the lights went down and the opening riffs of “Champagne Jam” were rockin’ the house was the ever-present aroma of pot smoke (yes, you could smoke in there back then, too).

Sure the place was a complete wreck when the show was over. When the lights came on, you could barely see the illuminated exit signs for the thick cloud of smoke as you shuffled down the sticky aisles, kicking aside drink cups and half-eaten boxes of pop corn with your ears still ringing from Kansas, Molly Hatchet, Cheap Trick or the aforementioned Atlanta Rhythm Section (with Mother’s Finest opening up).

But back then, there wasn’t any other place to see bands like that in Chattanooga. Bars were still meant for drankin’ and venues the size of the Roundhouse took the Stones to fill.

So across America, all of the oncenostalgic theaters of the olden days were utilized to deliver heavy metal to the masses. That was their purpose in the seventies and eighties and they did a great job of doing so.

And because we used our auditoriums for, dare I say, rock n’ roll events, they made money back then and we had some great musical moments in the ‘noog. The Who, James Brown and Prince all played Memorial Auditorium. Willie Nelson, John Prine and Jackson Browne played the Tivoli. And I will bet that every one of those shows either included some sort of concessions or someone lost their ass. That’s just the

way it is.

Why do you think we have trouble attracting quality shows now when we are located at the intersection of two major freeways and 150 miles from at least five major Southern cities that ARE getting this kind of entertainment? No one can make any money here—it’s as simple as that.

The proposal to the city council that I mentioned earlier reported that both the Memorial Auditorium and Tivoli combined earned $41,000 in concession sales last year. However, a case study of a similar historic theater in Knoxville—that does allow concessions in the seating area—reported more than $400,000 in concession revenues for that same year. For that kind of money, we could hire a professional cleaning company to spiff up the place after every event and re-upholster every single seat each and every year.

It doesn’t take Mr. Know-It-All to figure out that concessions mean money. Just look at the business model of the movie theater. Your ticket money goes to paying for the film, George Clooney, his manager, agent, bookie and girlfriend. So where does the movie theater make its money? On the $5 popcorn and $4 sodas, which they will let you enjoy right in your seat. And with that kind of profit, they don’t seem to mind cleaning up after you when the show is over. Maybe there’s a lesson here.

Chuck Crowder is a local writer and general man about town. His opinions are just that. Everything expressed is loosely based on fact, and crap he hears people talking about. Take what you just read with a grain of salt, but pepper it in your thoughts. And be sure to check out his wildly popular website www.thenoog.com

“Why do you think we have trouble attracting quality shows now when we are located at the intersection of two major freeways and 150 miles from at least five major Southern cities that ARE getting this kind of entertainment?”

vs Western Carolina, Sat. @ 2:00 p.m.

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Cover Story

CSO Pulls Out the Scary Stops

By Phillip Johnston

H

alloween Night is sneaking up on us, and downtown Chattanooga will be buzzing with many a costume party and themed event. Given the times, we can probably expect a handful of friendly (and not-so-friendly) vampires, a smattering of Wild Things, and even a handful of Jokers left over from last year. Whatever the costumes may be, crowds young and old will take to the streets this weekend in celebration of autumn’s key holiday.

An orchestral concert usually isn’t the first thing you think of to show off your brightest and best Halloween costume, but this year the Chattanooga Symphony Orchestra will present a pops concert on Halloween night that welcomes costumes of any sort—and audiences of any age.

It’s called the “Boo-Tacular!” and the CSO 12

is pulling out all the stops to make the Tivoli the place to be on Saturday night.

In addition to a program packed with movie music and spooky tunes, the orchestra will be dressed in Halloween costumes. The Tivoli lobby will be fully decorated to set the mood and a costume contest will take place at intermission with prizes for both children and adults. “I think it’s going to be very lively,” says Molly Sasse, the orchestra’s executive director. Or perhaps, “deadly”?

The “Boo-tacular!” is the Chattanooga Symphony’s second pops concert of the season, and it comes right off the heels of the Tchaikovsky Masterworks concert two weeks ago.

“I’ve been conducting pops and masterworks concerts for 30 years now and they are both of extraordinary value to me,” says Maestro Robert Bernhardt. “Nowadays, there is music of exceptional quality to play at pops concerts— challenging music that is written for a fullblooded symphony.”

There is a large body of work that has become associated with the spooky holiday, and Halloween concerts are often known to include

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popular pieces like Mussorgsky’s “Night on Bald Mountain”, Grieg’s “In the Hall of the Mountain King” and extracts from Bernard Herrmann’s legendary Alfred Hitchcock scores, but the music for the “Boo-Tacular!” is taken from a large group of scary sources. Scattered throughout the program are many film music selections, including memorable themes from Pirates of the Caribbean and the Harry Potter films.

“The program includes full choreography for many of the musical selections, an appearance by Lord Vader himself, and a climactic light saber battle.”

“There are also slots for just listening,” says Bernhart. “Some of the music is what’s expected from a classical concert, but it is also incredible music. We’ll have kids in the audience too, and we want them to hear really great music.”

Cover Story A lively Strauss polka makes an appearance and a jaunty tone poem by Saint-Saëns called “Danse Macabre” takes to the stage as well, but the bulk of the program is comprised of music by legendary film composer John Williams (Star Wars, Indiana Jones, Harry Potter).

Williams is known for his symphonic writing. His music is so prominent that it automatically conjures images—an important element for an event that relies so heavily on costumes and festive imagery. “I always try to come up with a reason [to showcase John Williams],” says Maestro Bernhart.

“His music is symphonic mastery.”

Even so, many of the musical selections for the “Boo-Tacular!” were chosen because of some special costumed guests.

Enter the 501st Legion. On first appearance, they seem to be a passionate group of Star Wars aficionados who pride themselves on elaborate costumes and parade around at events across the country, but Charleen Ellefson says this is only half of the story.

“The 501st Legion is a charity group,” she says. “We’re one of the top ten charities in the world and we specialize in appearances for children’s charities like the Make-AWish Foundation and the March of Dimes.” The group has also worked with the T.C. Thompson Children’s Hospital and will be seen this year in the Chattanooga Christmas parade.

Tacular!” isn’t a charity event per se, 25 of the Mos Nooga Squad will be in attendance to participate in the festivities. They’ve worked extensively with the orchestra to put together a program that includes full choreography for many of the musical selections, an appearance by Lord Vader himself, and a climactic lightsaber battle to accompany John Williams’ “Duel of the Fates” from Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace.

Before the concert starts, the Mos Nooga squad will be in the lobby to meet and greet guests. At intermission, they’ll officiate the costume contest and, after the evening’s big finale, will be out in the Tivoli foyer yet again with a full-size working R2D2 droid, Jango Fett, a Royal Guard, several Jedi, and an Imperial crew.

Each member of the 501st Legion is in charge of creating their own professional, movie-grade costume, some which can cost anywhere from $300 to $5,000. “Everybody loves Star Wars in the 501st,” says Ellefson, “but some of us have other reasons to be a part of it.”

For her, it was giving birth to a premature child 15 years ago

“I always try to come up with a reason [to showcase John Williams],” says Maestro Bernhart. “His music is symphonic mastery.”

Ellefson is head of the Mos Nooga Squad, the Chattanooga branch of the 501st Legion, a nationwide group of costumed volunteers and “the preferred Imperial costuming group” of George Lucas himself. Typically, the group only dresses up as members of “The Dark Side” since the 501st Legion is widely known in Star Wars mythology as “Vader’s Fist.”

Though this Saturday’s “Boo-

and receiving the love and care of the Ronald McDonald House.

She says being a part of the 501st Legion is her way of giving back to organizations that care about kids.

“Because of our costumes, the kids call us ‘the bad guys,’” she says, “but we’re really the good guys.”

Maestro Bernhart thinks that masterworks and pops concerts bring two different types of audiences to the Tivoli, and that people who try out the orchestra for the first time at a pops concert are at a particular advantage.

“If people come to pops concerts, they will most likely want to come back to them,” he says. With this in mind, the “Boo-Tacular!” is one of the most interactive events the Chattanooga Symphony has ever hosted and a perfect way for just about anyone to spend their Halloween night.

“People may realize how inviting the orchestra is,” Bernhart adds, “but what really matters is how we play—and the orchestra plays very well.”

CSO’s “Boo-Tacular!” $19-$79 8 p.m.

Saturday, October 31 Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad Street (423) 267-8583. www.chattanoogasymphony.org

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Spirits Within

Buffalo Trace, The Pride of Kentucky

By Joshua Hurley

L

ast week we talked about wines from Chile. The week before we discussed wines from California. Some time ago we went to Mexico and learned about 100 percent agave tequila. This week for our Great Buys, we’re going to talk about bourbon from Kentucky. ‘’Great Buys’’ is where Riley’s Wine and Spirits on Hixson Pike in Hixson picks favorite items from our large selection of wine and spirits from around the world and share them with the readers of The Pulse.

This week’s pick is Buffalo Trace Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey. Buffalo Trace is a new product in the Chattanooga market, and judging by early sales and customer response, it will become a permanent addition, along with Jim Beam, Jack Daniels and Maker’s Mark.

“Three hundred years ago, settlers were looking for a way to simulate the barley and rye whiskeys of their native lands.”

Did you know that in 1964 Congress passed a resolution naming bourbon whiskey ''the distinctive product of the United States''? Scotch comes from the Highlands of Scotland and rum from the Caribbean. Bourbon will always be from America, and it has also played a large role in our country’s heritage. Mark Twain was a devoted drinker and served it at his parties, President Lincoln sent a case to General U.S. Grant as a ''congrats'' present for his victory at Vicksburg, and spectators have been drinking mint juleps at the Kentucky Derby since it began. Bourbon is as American as apple pie and baseball.

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Even though nearly 75 percent of America’s bourbon comes from Kentucky, there is no law limiting its production to the Bluegrass State where it was first distilled. However, restrictions concerning the production of bourbon are written into Kentucky law.

According to the law, whiskey can only be called bourbon if it is a whiskey mash of at least 51 percent corn, rye, wheat, malted barley or malted grain. In addition, it must be distilled not exceeding 180 proof (most is distilled at between 125 and 145 proof) and then bottled at no less than 80 proof. It must be aged in new oak barrels.

Bourbon is as old as America itself. Three hundred years ago, settlers were looking for a way to simulate the barley and rye whiskeys of their native lands. As soon as the Indians taught the settlers how to grow corn, they began to try and make whiskey from it.

Whiskey made exclusively from corn was too sweet, so they improvised using wheat, rye and barley along with it. The Bourbon Information Bureau cites Baptist preacher Elijah Craig for distilling the first bourbon whiskey in 1789 and selling it. By 1811, there were more than 2,000 distilleries in Kentucky. Buffalo Trace is among the first, established in 1799.

Buffalo Trace honors the spirit of the buffalo, along with the first settlers and explorers who followed one another across the Kentucky River and westward. In fact, Buffalo Trace was the first to ship whiskey down the Mississippi River, the first to use steam power for distilling, the first to use organic corn and the first to market single-barrel bourbon whiskey.

The master distillers at Buffalo Trace make every effort to preserve the time-honored method of making great bourbon whiskey. They begin right at the bottom with picking only the finest corn, rye and malted barley available from Kentucky and Indiana. Second, they use only steam-heated mashing water filtered through Kentucky limestone rich in minerals. Once the water reaches the correct temperature, the rye, corn and malted barley are added.

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The third step is fermentation. ''Trace'' uses 12 fermenters, the largest amount in the industry.

Fermentation lasts anywhere between three and five days. The fourth step in the process is distillation, and ''Trace'' uses barrels made of oak from trees 70-80 years old. This is expensive, but it produces finer whiskey. Distillation lasts four to seven years and is done under the best conditions.

Buffalo Trace is light bronze in color with a touch of gold. It contains aromas of vanilla, mint and molasses. The taste is pleasantly sweet with touches of brown sugar and some spice, with a finish of toasty oak and vanilla. In 2008, Buffalo Trace took home bronze medals at the International Wine and Spirits Competition and The San Francisco World Spirits Competition and a gold medal at the Los Angeles International Wine and Spirits Competition.

Buffalo Trace is available at Riley’s Wine and Spirits, and coming in two to three weeks is a barrel chosen by the owners and staff. It will be proudly displayed along with cases available for sale by the case or by the bottle of a single-barrel bourbon aged exclusively in our barrel.

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Arts & Entertainment

Devotion: The Art of Play

By Michael Crumb

A

rtists Christine Gray and Johnston Foster have mounted an inspirational show at UTC’s Cress Gallery. An enthusiastic reception to their works attests to folks’ recognition of these artists’ intense drives to produce work that is both playful and relevant to deep aesthetic concerns.

Johnston Foster’s found material sculptures combine humor with complex concepts to produce effects that stun and satisfy. Christine Gray’s work, including paintings and painted gourd constructions, appears more cerebral as it invites viewers to contemplate the sources of imaginative vision. My strongest impression of this show reminded me how playful concentration strives toward expression that not only realizes complex forms, but also illuminates the impulse that provokes the artist to project such visions.

Foster and Gray are both faculty artists at Virginia Commonwealth University in Richmond.

They appear at the Cress Gallery as part of the UTC John and Diane Marek Visiting Artists Series. Comments that I encountered during the reception expressed excitement. I think that this is a particularly exemplary show for art students as well as the viewing public. Flashes of brilliance combining whimsy with depth remind me of innovative works lately at the Hunter’s NYU show and at the “Collaborations” exhibition at the Chattanooga African American Museum.

presents a small series of painted gourds and steel constructions.

The natural gourds are connected to steel with oils, using an intricate and energetic dynamic, as in “Black Zap” (2009). The painting connects the abstract to the real.

Gray also develops playful titles for her works that enhance their presence, a kind of extension of her method, probably best seen in her paintings.

She creates constructions of relatively simple materials. These real constructions inhabit her paintings, but, unlike a still life, her use of paint not only tends to alter these constructions, but also to connect these constructions to more abstract fields of light and texture. A fantastic cosmic energy drives the imagination forth from her constructed frames, indicating how the mundane remains connected to universal forces.

There is a common design known as “God’s Eye,” where a cross of wood supports a colorful diamond of yarn. Some of Gray’s frames involve wooden sticks that support yarn in open structures, suggesting portals to otherworldly energies, often combining light and darkness and the clarity of optics with abstract play. The effect often seamlessly merges the real and the unreal, a synthesis of the continuum of aesthetic vision.

Brava!

Johnston Foster’s surreal construction “Altered Beast” (2008), a dynamic strangeness of plastic

“All this play reveals the drive to revelation. Do not panic— it’s only art!”

These artists, each in their own way, produce synthetic works that merge what are often seen as divergent forms: realist and expressionist modes. Christine Gray, a native of Austin, Texas,

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feathering and other forms, vividly shows how a “static” piece can project great energy. His “Mob Scene” resembles the mob at Frankenstein’s castle, yet, paradoxically, proves in its onslaught to the viewer that the effect of the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. I found layers of subtexts reaching from the whimsical to the disturbed detritus of good times.

In “Good ‘N Plenty” (2005), a rubber cornucopia spews forth a wealth of consumer wishes. The excited “Big Tipper” (2008), a two-headed turtle, spills off its back a feast worthy of The Satyricon’s Trimalchio. The massive concentration of found materials, much plastic pretending to be real, call to mind a number of contexts that underlie our precarious existence. All this play reveals the drive to revelation. Do not panic—it’s only art!

A&E Calendar Friday

Thursday

A Sense of Wonder One-woman show about the life of Rachel Carson. $15 7 p.m.

UTC Fine Arts Center, Roland Hayes Concert Hall, corner of Vine & Palmetto Sts. (423) 267-1218. www.artsedcouncil.org

Send your calendar events to us at calendar@chattanoogapulse.com

“String Theory” 6:30 p.m. Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View.

(423) 267-0968. www.huntermuseum.org Opera In Cinema: Tchaokovsky’s Swan Lake 7 p.m. Rave Theatre, 5080 South Terrace Ave. (423) 855-9682.

Sick Around America Documentary 7 p.m. Jewish Cultural Center, 5461 Terrace Ave. (423) 493-0270.

AEC Independent Film Series: The Baader Meinhof Complex 7:30 p.m. Bijou Theatre, 215 Broad St. (423) 265-5320.

“From Hackman Hall to the West Wing” 8 p.m. Southern Adventist University, Ackerman Auditorium, 4801 Taylor Cir. (423) 236-2581.

Lorna’s Silence Part of AEC Independent Film Series. A woman is caught between love and rule of the mob.

Bijou Theatre, 215 Broad Street (423) 265-5320. www.carmike.com

Saturday

CSO’s “BooTacular!”

Music from some of your favorite scary movies (see this week’s cover story). $19 - $79 8 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad Street (423) 267-8583. www.chattanoogasymphony.org

Monday “Speak Easy” Spoken word and poetry 8 p.m. Mudpie Restaurant, 12 Frazier Ave. (423) 267-9040.

“Twenty Original American Etchings” Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944.

Art by Khambel Green Mosaic Gallery, 412 Market St. (423) 320-6758.

Works by Susan Dryfoos-Solo Show from New York Gallery 1401, 1401 Williams St. (423) 266-0015.

“Angels” by Mary Ferris Kelly Exum Gallery, St. Pauls Episcopal Church, 305 7th St. (423) 266-8195.

Friday Night Improv 7:30 p.m. Chattanooga State, Humanities Theater, 4501 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 697-3133.

Charlotte’s Web 7:30 p.m. Colonnade Center, 264 Catoosa Cir., Ringgold, GA. (706) 935-9000. www.colonnadecenter.org G.R. Goodwin & Matt Mitchell 8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com The Mystery of Flight 138 8:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839.

“Angels” by Mary Ferris Kelly Exum Gallery, St. Pauls Episcopal Church, 305 7th St. (423) 266-8195.

“Persona + Anima” Create Here, 55 East Main St., Ste. 105. (423) 648-2195.

“Magnificent Fifty” North River Civic Center, 1009 Executive Dr. (423) 870-8924.

“Maggie” Shuptrine Fine Art and Framing, 2646 Broad St. (423) 266-4453.

“Close to Home” Photography Covenant College, 14049 Scenic Hwy. Lookout Mtn, GA. (706) 419-1430.

“Sticky Situation” sculpture

by Johnston Foster & “Gazer” paintings by Christine Gray Cress Gallery, 752 Vine St. (423) 304-9789.

“Black Diamond Days: Life in the Negro Leagues” Chattanooga African American Museum, 200 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 266-8658.

“Small Works” Jewish Cultural Center, 5461 Terrace Ave. (423) 493-0270.

Sunday Charlotte’s Web 10 a.m. & 7:30 p.m. Colonnade Center, 264 Catoosa Cir., Ringgold, GA. (706) 935-9000.

Mosaic Market 11 a.m. 412 Market St. (corner of 4th/Market) (423) 624-3915.

Art Until Dark Noon. Winder Binder Gallery, 40 Frazier Ave. (423) 413-8999. www.artuntildark.com “Die Meistersinaer” Male Chorus Reunion Concert 4 p.m. Collegedale Adventist Church, 4829 College Dr. E (423) 396-2134.

The Mystery at the Nightmare High School Reunion 6 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839.

Halloween Swing Dance 7 p.m. The Clear Story, 400 E. Main St. (423) 316-7391.

G.R. Goodwin & Matt Mitchell 8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com Southern Night Live Talent Show 8 p.m. Southern Adventist University, Iles P.E. Center, 4801 Taylor Cir. (423) 236-2581.

The Mystery of the Red NeckItalian Wedding 8:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839. www.funnydinner.com “Reflections” Shuptrine Fine Art and Framing, 2646 Broad St. (423) 266-4453.

“Collaboration: Two Decades of African American Art” Chattanooga African American Museum, 200 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 266-8658. www.caamhistory.org

Tuesday

Wednesday

“Reflections” Shuptrine Fine Art and Framing, 2646 Broad St. (423) 266-4453.

“Magnificent Fifty” North River Civic Center, 1009 Executive Dr. (423) 870-8924.

“Close to Home” Photography

by Mark Wood Covenant College, 14049 Scenic Hwy. Lookout Mtn, GA. (706) 419-1430.

“Sticky Situation” sculpture

by Johnston Foster & “Gazer” paintings by Christine Gray Cress Gallery, 752 Vine St. (423) 304-9789.

“Small Works” Jewish Cultural Center, 5461 Terrace Ave. (423) 493-0270.

“A World of Glass” Houston Museum of Decorative Arts, 201 High St. (423) 267-7176. www.thehoustonmuseum.com “Collaboration: Two Decades of African American Art” Chattanooga African American Museum, 200 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 266-8658. www.caamhistory.org “Twenty Original American Etchings” Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944. www.huntermuseum.org Works by Susan Dryfoos-Solo Show from New York Gallery 1401, 1401 Williams St. (423) 266-0015.

Swan Lake Filmed version of the classic with St. Petersburg’s Mariinsky Ballet. $20 1 p.m.

Rave Motion Pictures, 5080 South Terrace, East Ridge.

(423) 855-9652. www.ravemotionpictures.com

“Echoes” 10 a.m. River Gallery, 400 E. Second St. (423) 265-5033. www.river-gallery.com “Christmas Creations” 11 a.m. In-Town Gallery, 26A Frazier Ave. (423)267-9214. www.intowngallery.com Free First Sundays Noon. Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View.

(423) 266-0944. www.huntermuseum.org Opera In Cinema: Tchaokovsky’s Swan Lake 1 p.m. Rave Theatre, 5080 South Terrace Ave. (423) 855-9682.

G.R. Goodwin & Matt Mitchell 8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233.

Art by Khambel Green Mosaic Gallery, 412 Market St. (423) 320-6758.

Editor’s Pick: Featured Event Of The Week String Theory Concert at the Hunter New series of onehour concerts kicks off with Anthony McGill, principal clarinetist with the Metropolitan Opera Orchestra. The Hunter promises the series is “a rich selection of masterpieces as well as rarely heard gems, and honors the Hunter’s renowned collection of American Art by performing selections from American composers throughout the year.” $18 6:30 p.m.

10 Bluff View.

(423) 267-0968. www.huntermuseum.org

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Shades Of Green

Green Build 2009: Indication of Progress

By Elizabeth Crenshaw

I

t’s that time of year again.

The leaves are changing, colder weather is moving in, and all over the country, architects, consultants, engineers, designers, planners, students, LEED APs and sustainability enthusiasts are gearing up for the environmental event of the year: Green Build 2009.

Green Build is the USGBC’s annual conference and expo. As a quick refresher, the USGBC (U.S. Green Building Council) sets LEED standards.

LEED (Leadership in Energy and Environmental Design) rating systems set the pace for sustainability in building design and operations. The organization is quickly expanding, now covering neighborhood development and healthcare. LEED and the USGBC may seem like a small niche in the sustainability movement, but the organization and its rating systems apply to many areas.

Americans spend most of their time indoors. We clear habitats to build our structures and we pour massive amounts of our natural resources into their creation. We cover the walls of our buildings with paint-emitting toxic fumes, causing headaches, dizziness and, at worst, damage to our nervous systems.

From these buildings, we throw 136 million tons of waste away annually.

Some of us drive long distances from the homes in which we spend our nights to the buildings where we will spend our days, emitting thousands of pounds of pollutants in the air.

Our buildings drain 14 percent of our potable water supply and utilize 72 percent of the electricity generated in this country. Our buildings can make us sick when we use harmful materials to clean and control pests. The conventional way of building and operating our infrastructure is the bulk of what

stands between a sustainable future and us. A business-as-usual attitude limits the reserves of potential innovation in this country.

This has not been written to prove that Americans don’t care about the environment or that we should all abandon what we’ve built and live in the woods. What this evidence proves is that we are capable of building something better. We can work with natural systems. We can continually invent better, healthier ways of living.

The outcome of operating with as little impact as possible does not have to translate into either we have our comfortable, 21st-century lifestyles or we sacrifice for the cause. Sustainability translates into opportunity for everyone. We can infuse the economy with products that are better for us and the planet, leaving more resources for those who come after us.

LEED standards are an answer to conventional building and planning.

The standards advise that problems can be solved if we are innovative, that technology is our friend, and that progress need not come at the expense of human health and the environment.

The Green Build conference is massive. In 2008, the event drew 28,000 people and 800 vendors. Being surrounded by thousands of people working toward the same goal, a sustainable future, is inspiring. With all those vendors touting the latest in green products and technology, it’s obvious that progress is being made in building the green market. Green Build has won a spot on the annual “50 fastest-growing trade shows in the U.S. and Canada” list for the past four years. Frame by frame, certification by certification, market transformation is taking place. Classes are held, equipping attendees to make a difference in their communities. But the standards aren’t perfect. Green Build provides an opportunity to trade lessons learned and recommend that

“The outcome of operating with as little impact as possible does not have to translate into either we have our comfortable, 21st-century lifestyles or we sacrifice for the cause.” changes be made.

This year, Green Build is being held in Phoenix, Arizona, but if you can’t make it, the USGBC makes many of the speakers’ speeches available online. For people under 25, the conference tickets are roughly 70 percent off. This year’s conference introduces a new event: the green building job fair, helping connect people to green-collar jobs.

Events like Green Build, when people come to together to advance this important transition, the shift to sustainability becomes less daunting. Yes, there is work to do; the problems are complex and the obstacles require perseverance, but with so many people invested, carving out a place for the green market in the global economy is possible. It’s more than possible. It’s happening.

Originally from South Carolina, Elizabeth Crenshaw moved to Chattanooga after graduating from Warren Wilson College in 2007. She is a LEED-accredited professional who believes sustainability can be achieved though applying the triple bottom line: people, planet, profit. In her spare time, she writes, takes pictures and practices yoga.

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New in Theaters This Is It When Michael Jackson died suddenly on the eve of what he promised would be a “transcendent” comeback series of concerts in London, untold millions of people around the world wondered what would have been. Jackson’s longtime concert director Kenny Ortega felt the same way, and knew he was sitting on a veritable gold mine—more than 80 hours of footage from all stages of the development of the “This Is It” concert. It’s easily the most anticipated documentary of the year. Ortega said bringing Jackson’s final work to the big screen ended up being relatively easy. “There’s a story there. There’s a story that’s alive in every frame of this film, that I didn’t have to fabricate,” he said in press conference last week. The film is also one of the most zealously guarded releases of the year, with no one but a few very select critics getting to see the complete work. Most reviewers were shown a 12-minute excerpt, but even from those scant few minutes, it’s evident what Ortega was talking about. The Michael we see is unguarded, real, honest in a way we might have never seen before.

Think what you will about Michael the person; Michael Jackson the entertainer is among the most talented and creative of all time. His death was a tragedy, but thanks to Ortega, Michael’s talent, creativity and vision did not die with him.

Starring: Michael Jackson Director: Kenny Ortega Rating: PG

Also in Theaters Astro Boy A young robot boy endowed with incredible powers embarks on a journey of acceptance and learns what it means to be a hero.

Amelia Hilary Swank stars in the story of pioneering aviatrix Amelia Earhart, the first woman to fly across the Atlantic Ocean.

Saw VI In this latest installment of the horror saga, Detective Hoffman emerges as the unchallenged successor to Jigsaw’s legacy of terror.

Cirque Du Freak: The Vampire’s Assistant A teenage boy finds his destiny when he stumbles upon a vampire and his traveling freak show.

Where the Wild Things Are A rambunctious boy named Max escapes to an island where he meets mysterious and strange creatures who crown him their king.

Law Abiding Citizen Gerard Butler stars as a criminal mastermind out

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for revenge, sending an entire city into chaos from the confines of his cell.

The Stepfather A young man grows suspicious of his mother’s new boyfriend—is he really the man of her dreams or could he be hiding a dark side?

Paranormal Activity A couple moves into a typical suburban house, but they become increasingly disturbed by a presence that could be demonic.

Couples Retreat Four couples embark on a tropical island vacation, only to discover that participation in the resort’s couples therapy is mandatory.

Zombieland A ragtag group joins forces to survive against worldwide zombie mayhem, and must determine what’s worse: the zombies or each other.

Capitalism: A Love Story Documentary filmmaker Michael Moore takes aim at the corporate and

political shenanigans behind the economic crisis.

The Invention of Lying In an alternate reality where lying doesn’t exist, Ricky Gervais is a downon-his-luck loser who suddenly develops the ability to lie.

Whip It Ellen Page stars as a teenage beauty pageant reject who finally finds herself after joining a fierce female roller derby team.

Toy Story & Toy Story 2 Woody, Buzz Lightyear and the rest of the gang from Pixar’s toy chest return for their original adventures— this time in 3-D! Fame At the New York City High School of Performing Arts, a talented group of singers, dancers, actors and artists strive for the spotlight.

Pandorum Two men wake up on a spacecraft with no memory of who they are or where they’re going, and must uncover the ship’s deadly secrets.

Film Feature

Everything Is Possible

by Phillip Johnston

T

he Carmike Bijou will close its doors at the end of this week and Chattanooga will say hello to the beautiful new 12-screen Majestic next door. The Majestic is the nation’s first LEED-certified “green” cinema and includes a VIP theater and Ovation Room complete with gourmet food and electronic reclining chairs.

The Arts and Education Council has one more film planned to screen on the tattered screens of the Bijou as part of the fall Independent Film Series and it is one of the most acclaimed of the season—Lorna’s Silence, a film by Jean-Pierre and Luc Dardenne.

The brothers Dardenne are some of the most notable filmmakers working today. They come out of a rich tradition of European filmmaking and their films will no doubt be catalogued on lists alongside the best of Ingmar Bergman, Federico Fellini, and Carl Th. Dreyer in the near future.

They have crafted a vigorously naturalistic film aesthetic that has garnered their films many prizes at the Cannes Film Festival including the Palme d’Or in 1999 and 2002 for their films Rosetta and L’Enfant (The Child).

Sokol. Before Lorna can open her doors, she unwittingly becomes an accomplice in the infernal plans of a mobster named Fabio— plans that attempt to strip her of her identity and her humanity It would be unwise to summarize the plot any further because Dardenne films hinge on moments of surprise. By this, I don’t mean jump scenes or revelatory plot twists—the very concept is far too American—but intensely personal emotional revelations that change our perceptions of the internal lives of the characters.

The apparent story of a Dardenne film is simple and very important, but the internal struggles of the characters are what make their films so unique.

In addition to the handheld camera, another reason a Dardenne film feels so natural is their method of working with actors. When filming begins, the brothers don’t feel pressure to direct their actors exactly the way they have rehearsed things.

“We pretend that we are starting over from zero so that we can rediscover things that we did before,” said Luc Dardenne in an interview with Cinéaste Magazine. “The instructions we give the actors are above all physical. We start working without the cameraman—just the actors and my brother and me. We walk them through the blocking [and they] say but do not act their lines. We do not tell them what the tone of their lines should be.” The directors then bring the camera in and shoot the scene in one long take, allowing them to subsequently modify details.

“The apparent story of a Dardenne film is simple and very important, but the internal struggles of the characters are what make their films so unique.”

The bulk of their work focuses on young people teetering on the edge of society in lower-class Belgium. Their latest film is the story of a young Albanian woman named Lorna who plans on opening a snack bar in Belgium with her boyfriend

Their signature method of approaching moral, spiritual, and psychological dilemmas is breathlessly subtle and provoking, even if one does not agree with their conclusions. Each film in their constantly expanding oeuvre is morally undergirded (yet never preachy) and deftly gives testimony to the human need for absolution and repentance. “[Lorna’s Silence is] about a young woman who has every reason to be desperate and who continues to believe that everything is possible,” concludes Luc Dardenne in the film’s press kit. “How can a woman who doesn’t believe in God believe everything is possible? Where does this crazy hope come from?”

These are the questions of Lorna’s Silence, the Dardenne Brothers’ story of a young woman caught between love and a world of crime and deception.

Lorna’s Silence Directed by Jean-Pierre and Luc Dardenne Starring Arta Dobroshi, Jeremie Renier, Fabrizio Rongione Rated R Running time: 105 minutes Bijou Theatre, 215 Broad Street (423) 265-5320. www.carmike.com

95.3 Pulse News www.chattanoogapulse.com 10.29.09 The Pulse

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Free Will Astrology SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Your anti-role model—the person you should be the opposite of—is the Scorpio warrior, U.S. General George Patton, also known as “Old Blood and Guts.” He once said, “Practically everyone but myself is a pusillanimous son of a bitch.” That’s an attitude you should especially avoid in the coming weeks, since your success will depend on you seeing the best in people—even if they sometimes don’t seem to warrant it. P.S. It may be OK to think of yourself as “Old Blood and Guts” if and only if you dedicate your ferocity to the service of smart love and ingenious collaboration.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Congratulations, Sagittarius! Free Will Astrology’s Task Force on Creative Suffering has confirmed that your current dilemmas are exceptionally interesting and useful. You have demonstrated an impressive talent for getting embroiled in riddles that promise to bring out your dormant reserves of vitality and ingenuity. The dumfounding questions you’ve been wrestling with are highcaliber tests that have drawn you closer to the heart of the reasons you’re here on Earth. Take full advantage of this beautiful mess, my dear.

Chaos this fertile is hard to come by.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): When Dante was nine years old, long before he became one of Italy’s supreme poets, he fell in love with Beatrice, an eight-year-old girl he met at a May Day party.

They never had a close relationship. In the years after their initial encounter, they met infrequently, and both eventually married other people. But Beatrice played a crucial role throughout Dante’s life, although she died at the age of 24. She was not just his muse, but also his “beatitude, the destroyer of all vices and the queen of virtue, salvation.” Dante even wrote her into his Divine Comedy in the role of a guide. Is there any person or influence in your life equivalent to Beatrice?

Any once-upon-a-time blessing that might be ready to give you the fullness of the gifts it has been waiting all this time to deliver?

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): I would love it if you could find a sword that could cut itself. Or a fire that could burn itself. Or some water you could wash. But even if you can conjure the magic to attract an experience that simply resembles one of those marvelous paradoxes, it would set in motion a series of epiphanies that would liberate you from an inferior paradox—a confusing absurdity that is not worthy of you and that has been draining your life force.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): The planets are aligned in such a way that suggests you may be able to experience an orgasm solely by meditating.

This rare cosmic alignment also means that it’s conceivable you could generate money or attract new resources by following your holy bliss, or that you might stumble upon the tricky treasure you’ve been looking for in all the wrong places.

But I can’t say for sure that you will actually be able to capitalize on any of these remarkable opportunities. It will depend on whether you can more fully express one of the skills that is your birthright as a Pisces: being wild and disciplined at the same time.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): There was a time when wetlands were considered dismal and unproductive. At best they were thought to be a waste of space, and at worst stinky breeding grounds for insect pests. For more than 200 years, many marshes, bogs, and swamps were filled with dirt and transformed into places suitable for farms, houses, and recreational areas. But all that has changed in the last 30 years. Science has rehabilitated the reputation of wetlands, showing how crucial they are. They clean toxins from water, help control floods and soil erosion, and are home to more biological diversity than any other ecosystem. The coming weeks would be an excellent time for you to make a comparable conversion, Aries. Something you once demeaned or underestimated could become an inspirational catalyst.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In the coming week,

22

By Rob Brezsny

JONESIN’

By Matt Jones

“2 Funny”

–i’z in ur crosswurd, makin u solv.

you will have the potential to articulate what has never been spoken before and to name truths that everyone has been avoiding. Uncoincidentally, you may also be able to hear what you’ve never been able to hear up until now and tune in to truths you’ve been oblivious to. As you might imagine, Taurus, you must fully activate both of these capacities in order for either to function at its best.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Nature’s rhythm is cyclical. Everything alive waxes and wanes. If you’re smart, you honor that flow by periodically letting parts of your world wither or go to sleep.

If you’re not so smart, you set yourself up for needless pain by indulging in the delusion that you can enjoy uninterrupted growth. According to my reading of the astrological omens, Gemini, this is your time to explore the creative possibilities of ebbing and slackening. Ask yourself the following question, which I’ve borrowed from the Jungian author Clarissa Pinkola Estes: “What must I allow to die today in order to generate more life tomorrow?”

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Pregnant women sometimes have unusual cravings. From the fourth to sixth month of her daughter’s gestation period, for example, my friend Marta was on occasion beset by the longing to eat toothpaste. I’ve known other women who fantasized about nibbling on mud, coffee grounds, and chalk. Fortunately, they all resisted the urge, which is what health practitioners recommend. Instead they tried to figure out if their bodies were trying to tell them about some legitimate deficiency of vitamins or minerals. I offer this to you as a metaphor to keep in mind. As your own special creation ripens, you may experience odd desires. Don’t necessarily take them at face value.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): It might be tempting to turn your home into a womb-like sanctuary and explore the mysteries of doing absolutely nothing while clad in your pajamas. And frankly, this might be a good idea. After the risks you’ve taken to reach out to the other side, after the bridges you’ve built in the midst of the storms, after the skirmishes you’ve fought in the Gossip Wars, you have every right to retreat and get your homebody persona humming at a higher vibration. So I say: Be meticulously leisurely as you celebrate the deep pleasures of self-care.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Hey Rob: I was having trouble finishing my novel—typical writer’s block. So I sidetracked myself into making silly creative projects—papier-mache chickens, masks made out of junk mail, collages incorporating bottle caps and dryer lint. I can’t say any of it is ‘art,’ but I feel creative again and my house is full of colorful stuff I whipped up myself. If you wait to be perfect, I concluded, you’ll never make anything. I tried something I knew I’d be bad at, so failure didn’t matter. Now I’m branching out with my inadequacy—not waiting for Mr. Perfect but having a beer with Joe Flawed, forgetting to be right all the time, admitting that I haven’t a clue. I’ve become smilingly, brilliantly dumb.

— Inappropriate Virgo.” Dear Inappropriate: Congrats! You’re doing exactly what I want to advise all Virgos everywhere to try.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): At a yard sale today, I paid a dollar for a stained, pocket-sized horoscope book with many of its pages missing. The reason I made such an odd investment is that it had a forecast for Libra for the first part of November 2009, and this forecast struck me as even more useful than the horoscope I had composed for you.

As a public service, I’m providing it here. “The graceful dragonfly lives for just a few months. But a sequoia tree’s time on earth can last 2,000 years.

In the same way, some bonds, some creations, some worlds, endure for a mere blink in eternity, while others are destined to outfox the ravages of time. What will be the lifespan of the dream you recently hatched, Libra? It is time to decide and take action.”

Homework: I invite you to launch a crusade to raise the level of well-being everywhere you go.

Report results to FreeWillAstrology.com.

The Pulse 10.29.09 www.chattanoogapulse.com 95.3 Pulse News

Across 1 Paparazzo’s need 5 Actor Sharif 9 Prefix meaning “one tenth” 13 Bread spreads 15 1990s electronic music party 16 Worst of the population 17 Insurance company with TV ads featuring cavemen 18 Rate Jennifer Lopez’s newest alter ego?

20 Like some marble designs on furniture 22 The clap, e.g.: abbr.

23 Porcine pad 24 Time to phone your nearest Nabokov character?

28 “Brother” of Bruno and Borat 29 Aromatic, oily substance 32 Grp. that issues fraud alerts 35 “Commander in Chief” actress Davis 37 Prefix meaning “one quintillionth” 38 Got lazy for the sake of worship?

42 Three-layered snack 43 Biden’s boss 44 Ed.’s submissions 45 Choir section 48 Panache

49 With 59-across, Kojak’s bootleg British porn title?

55 Bullfighting cheer 57 “The Office” character 58 Adjective for Porky Pig and Sylvester 59 See 49-across 63 Grandmas, to some 64 Jessica of “The Love Guru” 65 Former Israeli prime minister Olmert 66 Muse of love poetry 67 “In ___ of flowers...”

68 Uses finger paint, say 69 Actor Gold of the Fox series “Stacked” Down 1 Common sense 2 Verdugo of “Marcus Welby, M.D.” 3 Actor Sam of the “Jurassic Park” series 4 Orange County’s area, slangily 5 Nonprofit’s URL suffix 6 Damage the surface 7 “Stop,” to a pirate 8 Colorful identifier for some Levi’s 9 Cable Internet alternative: abbr.

10 Community of organisms 11 Extremely devoted group 12 “If ___ be so bold...”

14 Dirty condition 19 Old Icelandic saga 21 Portioned (out) 25 Deceive 26 Yearly parody prize awarded at Harvard 27 Jai ___ (fast-moving sport) 30 Four-wheelers, e.g.

31 Barney’s hangout 32 Amorphous mass of goo 33 When doubled, an island in the South Pacific 34 Wiccan salutation 36 Have ___ (party it up) 39 Come in last 40 It may have attachments 41 First designated spot at a swim meet, perhaps 46 Former Montreal baseballer 47 On the schedule 50 Mutual city?

51 “Sugar is sweet and ___ you” 52 Historic record 53 “That’s cool!”

54 Vacuum cleaner inventor Sir James 55 Shape of some hand mirrors 56 “Mystic Pizza” actress Taylor 60 Oui, it’s water 61 Place for a round of darts 62 Mag. bigwigs

©2009 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com) For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #0438.

Table Service

The Cheeseburger of Your Dreams

By Rebecca Cruz

L

et’s get one thing straight up front…Cheeburger Cheeburger is nothing like the restaurant John Belushi ran in one of the funniest Saturday Night Live skits ever, where, regardless of what his customers requested, all Belushi ever offered was a “cheeboiger, cheeboiger, no Coke. Pepsi!”

According to Charlie Eich, five-year owner of the Chattanooga location, whether or not the founder of the nationwide chain of restaurants (55 locations so far) actually got the name from the popular SNL line remains a mystery.

As a matter of fact, all Charlie Eich has been told about the name of the restaurant is that it was originally named “Images”, referring to the Wall of Fame pictures on the wall (we’ll get to that later), but renamed Cheeburger Cheeburger not too long after the first location opened in Sanibel, Florida back in 1984. Either way, good call on the name change!

My server, Jennifer, suggested I try her unnamed favorite combination, a Serious cheeburger with mozzarella cheese, chopped black olives, guacamole, and sautéed onions. It was seriously good! “We even keep some peanut butter in the back for customers who request it on their cheeburgers,” said Eich. Peanut butter on a burger?! What?!

Eww!! But, since I prefer to have choices, I support your right to add whatever-weird-ingredient-you want to your own burger!

For sides, I tried both the onion rings and french fries. Both are hand-cut, battered, and very good.

Now, those more-superior burger eaters might want to take the “Famous Pounder” Challenge.

Finish off a whopping one-pound cheeburger, and your picture goes up on the “Wall of Fame.” The burger is actually 20 ounces before it’s cooked…

I’m full just thinking about it! Younger folks can choose to try the half-pounder instead.

“Choose how well you want your 100-percent Angus beef cheeburger cooked, and then comes the fun part—choose any number of dozens of toppings to customize your cheeburger.”

Fortunately, unlike the SNL restaurant, Cheeburger Cheeburger is all about choices. Not only does your “cheeburger” come with a choice of eight different types of cheeses, if requested, the cook can be persuaded to leave the cheese off altogether. Choose how well you want your 100-percent Angus beef cheeburger cooked, and then comes the fun part—choose any number of dozens of toppings to customize your cheeburger.

The Chattaboogie Cheeburger-Cheeburger is decorated up like a ’50s malt shop, with antique memorabilia from the ’50s & ’60’s, neon lighting, swivel barstools, complete with music from the same couple of decades playing in the background. While Cheeburger Cheeburger is part of the chain of like restaurants, the downtown version still has a “Mom & Pop” feel about it, which I really appreciate.

Because I was sitting up on a swivel barstool at the ice cream counter, I HAD to try one of the handmade shakes…I just had to! It wasn’t an easy choice, though. There are 80 different combinations of shakes to choose from! Luckily, Eich suggested his personal favorite, the Oreo Cheesecake shake. Yummy!! And it was.

Contrary to popular belief, locals can get served in about 15 minutes for lunch. Be a bit patient, though. Your fresh, cooked-to-order, 100-percent Angus burger might take a little extra time—but it’s worth it!!

Cheeburger Cheeburger of Chattanooga, 138-A Market Street. (423) 265-4108. www. cheeburger.com.

95.3 Pulse News www.chattanoogapulse.com 10.29.09 The Pulse

23

Music Feature

Truly Scary

By Hellcat

A

s I find myself attending many of Chattanooga’s music venues to satiate my need for rock and roll, I can’t help but notice something that sends chills up my spine and makes the little hairs on the back of my neck stand on end. It’s the attendance.

With all the talent brimming over the edges of our little city, it’s a bit shocking to see the turnouts continue to dwindle. Whether it is a national act, an out-of-town band with a generally consistent draw, or a new face with all the potential to be the next big thing; attendance and numbers at the door are down.

Over the past few months, if you truly take a look, you’ll see venues going belly up left and right. We’ve seen The Low Down, Murphy’s Ale House (and then The Tin Can), slip quietly away into memory, replaced with a “For Lease” or “For Sale” sign. Some of the prominent venues in town are fighting to keep their heads above water, and a musician or band on the stage. It’s horrific. I see some of my friends and acquaintances, selling themselves short just to make a sale at all, as I watch door prices go from $10, to $7, then $5.

The incentives have gotten bigger, as we are promised prizes or drink specials, or free food just to attend, and yet the draft in the back of an empty place seems to have gotten colder, while you stand there hoping to use your Jedi powers to fill a room.

I know money is tight. You don’t have to tell me. Most of the time, I end up working for free, just in an attempt to bring something to the city that people will possibly become a fan of or at least enjoy. The outlook is grim, people.

Music, in any city, is its own little economy. You’ve got venues that are saved by the fact they sell booze.

Because let’s face it, when times are tough, people tend to self-medicate a little more. However, it seems, more so recently, that people are staying home. I can’t blame them. I’m broke, too. But it does break my little icy heart to watch.

Beyond venues, you have the musicians, who are struggling to break even, the music stores and equipment rental places, who are probably

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The Pulse 10.29.09 www.chattanoogapulse.com 95.3 Pulse News

“Some of the prominent venues in town are fighting to keep their heads above water, and a musician or band on the stage.” seeing less and less business, plus the sound and lighting guys who are now forced to play a game of “cut-throat” with each other to land even the smallest of gigs. When attendance is down, the shows go down in quality because they have no choice. A light show becomes more of a dream than a reality, and a sound rig may be reduced to just a few monitors, or whatever you can get by on without hurting people’s ears.

Producers, sound engineers, distributors, and album artists all take a hit too. If a band that was used to pulling at least $500 a show, is settling for $250, the album that was set to be recorded in the spring and released in the fall has just been delayed another six months. The people that do come out are watching with a cautious eye as their tabs add up, and seem to be more preoccupied with the bill than

dancing or shouting encouragements to their favorite band.

It bothers me so much, because I guess my biggest fear is having a music scene here for the taking but not being able to keep it supported, and aside from footing the bills myself (which I would if I could), we are running out of options. If you have any ideas, be sure and e-mail me. I would love to hear them.

I wrote on this topic because, in the spirit of Halloween, I wanted to address something that genuinely frightens me. The decline of show attendance is definitely my nightmare.

I’m not saying all shows are suffering.

Some are thriving like that little flower that found its way out through a crack in the concrete, but for the most part it’s bleak. So do me a favor, readers— trick yourself into thinking your bank account is unusually ample and treat yourself to some of the best acts our town has to offer! We’ve got a bunch going on this Halloween.

The Icons, River City Hustlers, and Planet will be kicking off the festivities at Parkway this Friday, followed by The Bohannons, Gringo Star, and Big Kitty on Saturday. The Unsatisfied will be at Champy’s with the Hustlers.

Night of the Wolf, Kissfits, Bring the Witch, Capt. Black, and Rock Biter will be at JJ’s Bohemia. Eris and The Tammys will be rocking The Riverhouse Pub, among many others!

Happy Halloween!

Music Calendar Friday

Thursday

Joe Bonnamasso The U.K. blues-rock star has played with Eric Clapton and is a six-string maestro. $24 and up 8 p.m.

Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad St. (423) 642-TIXS. www.chattanoogaonstage.com

Send your calendar events to us at calendar@chattanoogapulse.com

The Pool 5 p.m. First Tennessee Pavilion, 1829 Carter St. www.chattanoogamarket.com Charles Allison, Alexa Woodward, Tiffany Taylor 8 p.m. Lindsay Street Hall, 901 Lindsay St. (423) 755-9111.

Emily Grace and Billy Hopkins 8:30 p.m. Mudpie Restaurant, 12 Frazier Ave. (423) 267-9043.

Here Come The Mummies and The Distribution 9 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644.

Preston Parris Project 9 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202.

(423) 499-5055.

Gurle Haggard, The Tillers, Bill Harvey, Centrinela Massacre 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400.

Cadillac Jones, Digital Butter, Robosapien and more Boneyard Boogie brings it downtown this year with more than 15 live acts for a night of dancing and pure chaos. $25 at the door 8 p.m.

Loose Cannon, 1400 Rossville Ave. (423) 310-8949. www.jmjpresents.com

Saturday

Kissfits, Night of the Wolf, Rock Biter, Capt. Black, Bring The Witch Need a break from the dance craze? Bang your head at the Heavy Metal Halloween Show. $6 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia

Monday Hello Highwater, BTB, Tastydactyls, Apple Trees and Tangerines 7 p.m. The Warehouse, 5716 Ringgold Rd., East Ridge. www.myspace.com/warehousetn Old Tyme Players 7 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com DJ at the Palms 8 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202.

(423) 499-5055.

Fireside Lounge 4021 Hixson Pike, (423) 870-7078.

Lucky’s 2536 Cummings Highway, (423) 825-5145.

Tremont Tavern 1203 Hixson Pike, (423) 266-1996.

Taxicab Racers and Raenbow Station 7 p.m. Covenant College, 14049 Scenic Hwy. (706) 820-1560.

Starr Adkins 7:30 p.m. The Foundry, 1201 Broad St. (423) 424- 3775.

New Orleans Jazz Trio 7:30 p.m. The Original Blue Orleans Restaurant, 3208 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 629-6538.

Coathanger Abortion, Skew, Toe Tagged, Atrocious Abnormality 8 p.m. Ziggy’s Hideaway, 607 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 634-1074 www.myspace.com/ziggyshideaway Terry Smith 8 p.m. Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse, 105 McBrien Rd. www.christunity.org BackSeat Bingo, Rabidears 9 p.m. Riverhouse Pub, 224 Frazier Ave. (423) 752-0066.

Common Ground 9 p.m. Spectators, 8201 E. Brainerd Rd. (423) 648-6679.

Grassy Blue 9 p.m. Angelo’s Sports Bar, 810 Stuart Rd. NE. (423) 479-0522.

The Wrong Way: A Tribute to Sublime 10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.com Dexter Rommwebber Duo, The Rayons 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400.

Cadillac Saints 10 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com The Pool 10 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. www.budssportsbar.com

Sunday Baadmojo and more 10 a.m. Hales Bar Marina, 1265 Hales Bar Rd. (423) 942-9000.

DJ Gruv Johnny Z and Chaotic Suspensions 8 p.m. Ziggy’s Hideaway, 607 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 634-1074.

SCARYoke 8 p.m. Rhapsody Café, 1201 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-3093.

Starr Adkins 8 p.m. The Foundry, 1201 Broad St. (423) 424- 3775.

Dana Rogers 8 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202.

(423) 499-5055.

Kenny Meeks 8 p.m. Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse, 105 McBrien Rd. The Pool 8 p.m. The Tin Can, 618 Georgia Ave. (423) 648-4360.

The Bohannons, Gringo Starr, Big Kitty 9 p.m. Parkway Billiards, 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 265-POOL. Milele Roots 9 p.m. Northshore Bar and Grille, 16 Frazier Ave. (423) 757-2000.

Toneharm 9 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260.

Joint Effort 9 p.m. Spectators, 8201 E. Brainerd Rd. (423) 648-6679.

Sloppy Roast Beef 10 p.m. Midtown Music Hall, 818 Georgia Ave. (423) 752-1977.

Eris, The Tammys 10 p.m. Riverhouse Pub, 224 Frazier Ave. (423) 752-0066.

Moonlight Bride, MockinBird, Forest Magic, DJ SkiQueen 10 p.m. Lindsay Street Hall, 901 Lindsay St. (423) 755-9111.

Tuesday

Wednesday

Before There Was Roselyn, On Paradise Blvd.

7 p.m. The Warehouse, 5716 Ringgold Rd., East Ridge. www.myspace.com/warehousetn The Ben Friberg Trio 7 p.m. Table 2, 232 E. 11th Street. (423) 756-8253. www.table2restaurant.com Billy Hopkins & Friends 8 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Open Mic with Hellcat 9 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919.

Channing Wilson 9 p.m. Spectators, 7804 E. Brainerd Rd. (423) 648- 6679.

Open Mic with Mike McDade 9 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1966. www.tremonttavern.comBen

Friberg Jazz Trio 6:30 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Uncle Billy and Friends 8 p.m. The Tin Can, 618 Georgia Ave. (423) 648-4360. www.thetincanchattanooga.com Jeremy Leslie 9 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. www.budssportsbar.com Moonlight Taxi 9:30 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.com DJ GOP The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202, (423) 499-5055.

Tremont Tavern 1203 Hixson Pike, (423) 266-1996.

Kara’ORY’oke Around-town dude Ory hosts his infamous karaoke at the even more infamous JJ’s. $3 9 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia

Baadmojo Noon. First Tennessee Pavilion, 1829 Carter St. www.chattanoogamarket.com Open Mic w/Jeff Daniels 4 p.m. Ms. Debbie’s Nightlife Lounge 4762 Highway 58, (423) 485-0966. www.myspace.com/debbieslounge Rick Mayo 5 p.m. Champy’s, 526 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 752-9198.

Irish Music Sessions 6 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1966. www.tremonttavern.com Open Mic Gene’s Bar & Grill, 724 Ashland Terrace, (423) 870-0880.

DJ GOP The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd #202, (423) 499-5055.

Editor’s Pick: Featured Event Of The Week

Hell Comes to The House of God With a title like that, who needs an explanation—only an excuse. It’s hard to feel guilty in the 100-year-old church while Moonlight Bride, MockinBird, Forest Magik, and multiple DJs are tearing it up for your devilish pleasure.

Saturday, October 31 $10, 10 p.m.

Lindsay Street Hall, 901 Lindsay St. (423) 755-9111. www.lindsaystreethall.com

95.3 Pulse News www.chattanoogapulse.com 10.29.09 The Pulse

25

New Music Reviews Duet for Theremin and Lap Steel

OOIOO

Live

(Thrill Jockey)

By Ernie Paik

Armonico Hewa

(duetonline.net)

The Theremin is one of the most difficult musical instruments to master, because it has no tactile reference points—it has no frets, keys, open strings, or anything to guide the player toward discrete notes. This is not a stumbling block for the Atlanta outfit Duet for Theremin and Lap Steel; it’s actually the basis for the duo’s sound and approach.

The lap steel, used almost exclusively for country music, can actually be a versatile instrument, and it’s a perfect companion to the Theremin, as every note from either instrument glides smoothly and weightlessly, without being anchored to any construction.

At times, synthetic drum beats enter the duet’s mix, but I much prefer the rhythm-free style; then, the music is totally unstructured and has nothing to follow, making it some of the most wonderfully abstract music I’ve heard this year.

The duet’s latest CD features two live sets from 2008, with Scott Burland on Theremin and Frank Schultz on lap steel giving completely improvised performances. The recording is pristine, likely taken from the soundboard, and, if it wasn’t for the applause at the end, it could pass for a studio recording. Burland and Schultz both channel their instruments’ sounds through laptop computers for real-time processing, making their notes echo and bubble eerily, with fluctuating timbres.

Valid comparisons can be made to Brian Eno’s ambient music, but the music lies a bit closer to the Kosmische music of certain German bands like Cluster. The duet’s sound is generally easy on the ears, and one strength is being continually stimulating in a subtle, non-jarring way. There are a few conspicuous diversions, such as the aforementioned drum beats and some manipulated French language vocal samples, but mostly, the CD is the sound of two untethered astronauts with a strange and elegant sonic choreography.

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The Pulse 10.29.09 www.chattanoogapulse.com 95.3 Pulse News

The new, sixth album from the Japanese allwoman band OOIOO is entitled Armonico Hewa, which is a language mash-up: “armonico” means “harmonic” in Spanish, and “hewa” means “air” in Swahili. Similarly, the group’s music itself is an international blend, but it’s not so simple to define in two words. The outfit often gets called “tribal,” due to the upfront, tomheavy drum rhythms, frantic chanting in unfamiliar languages, and other peculiar vocal exclamations. The songs on Armonico Hewa typically feature short melodic fragments or guitar skronking, hammered out with a throbbing repetition; new wavestyle synth chords are prominent on “Ulda,” but usually, the electronic sounds linger in the background, as seasoning.

The front woman of OOIOO is Yoshimi P-We, best known as a drummer in the group Boredoms and the titular character of the Flaming Lips album Yoshimi Battles the Pink Robots. Few bands today are as intensely compelling as Boredoms, but OOIOO sometimes gets close to matching that adrenaline level, bearing certain similarities; at times, Boredoms deliver an updated, overcharged kind of primitivism, like the German band Amon Düül on uppers, but OOIOO seems to go more aboriginal, when it comes to its sources. The bass lines on “Konjo” and “Agacim” allude to African roots, but this is hardly Paul Simon’s Graceland.

Armonico Hewa is a restless album, although not to the level of early Boredoms material, with violently abrupt stops and starts. The flow of the album is a bit difficult, so it’s best experienced in manageable doses.

As wild as it sounds, the band seems confined and not quite spread out widely enough. There typically isn’t sufficient time to allow its rhythms to dig their hooks in deeply or to let the mounting intensity levels reach their full potential. The album may be about harmonic air, but it could stand a little breathing room.

95.3 Pulse News www.chattanoogapulse.com 10.29.09 The Pulse

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Halloween Event Calendar Haunted Houses Lodge of Fear $10 (coupon on website) October 30, 31 8 p.m. – Midnight The Ridgedale Lodge, Dodds Ave. www.lodgeoffear.synthasite.com Ruby Falls Haunted Cavern $22 at the door ($20 online) Thursday to Saturday 8 p.m. – 11 p.m.

1720 South Scenic Highway www.hauntedcavern.com Haunted CarnEvil : Revenge of the Vampires $20 (includes mini golf and other treats) October 29, 30, 31 7 p.m. – late 5918 Brainerd Road. sirgoonys.com/HCsite/index11.htm Haunted House on Broad Street $20 Through October 31 7 p.m. – Midnight 2201 Broad Street hauntedhouseonbroadstreet.com Clown Town $15 Through October 31 8 p.m. – late Eastgate Town Center www.darksidewrestling.net House of Horrors $9 October 29, 30, 31 7 p.m. – Midnight 140 Edwards Street, Cleveland, Tennessee www.wewillscareyou.com Forest of Fear – Voodoo Bayou $15 October 30, 31 7 p.m. – late 271 Chattanooga Valley Road Flintstone, Georgia www.thevoodoobayou.com Haunted Hilltop $15 October 30, 31 7 p.m. – 1 a.m.

8235 Highway 58, Harrison, Tennessee www.thehauntedhilltop.com Haunted Barn $15 (coupon on website) October 30, 31 7 p.m. – Midnight 5107 McDonald Road Mcdonald, Tennessee thehauntedbarnchattanooga.com

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The Chopping Maul $10 per head Through November 1 7 p.m. – Midnight Bradley Square Mall Cleveland, Tennessee www.terrortainment.com Enchanted Maize $9 Adults, $7 Kids Thur: 9 a.m. – 6:30 p.m.

Fri: 9 a.m. – 6 p.m.

Sat: 10:30 a.m. – 6 p.m.

Sun: Noon – 6:30 p.m.

271 Chattanooga Valley Road, Flintstone, Georgia www.enchantedmaze.com

Halloween Events Aqua Scarium at Tennessee Aquarium Family Fun Trick or Treat $25 (adults), $19 3-12 6:30 p.m.

October 30 201 Chestnut Street (423) 265-0695. www.tnaqua.org Hallowcon October 30-November 1 $50 for all three days Country Hearth Inn 6700 Ringgold Rd. (423) 892-8100. www.hallowcon.com Spooky Days at Creative Discovery Museum Stories, Cider, and Pumpkin Carving

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321 Chesnut Street Chattanooga, Tennessee October 31, 1 p.m.

Members free, $9.95 non-members www.cdmfun.org

Halloween Parties BoneYard Boogie Loose Cannon/Contrapasso 1400 Rossville Ave. October 30 at 8 p.m.

Over 15 live acts Costume contests 18 and up $20 in advance, $25 at door Midnight Mayhem on the River Southern Belle riverboat October 30 at 10:30 p.m.

Proceeds go to Ronald McDonald House $10 plus tax and gratuity Stage Fright Halloween Party $10 8 p.m.

October 31 Chattanooga Theatre Centre 400 River Street (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre. com CSO Boo-Tacular! $19-$79 8 p.m.

October 31 Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad Street (423) 267-8583. www.chattanoogasymphony.org

Halloween at The Hunter: A Magnificent Masquerade $35 9 p.m.

October 31 10 Bluff View (423) www.huntermuseum.org Aretha Frankenstein’s Halloween Party 8 p.m.

October 31 518 Tremont Street (423( 265-SOUL

Halloween Music Events Pre-Halloween ThrowDown Flannel Boy and Axis One 10 p.m.

October 29 Riverhouse Pub 224 Frazier Ave. (423) 752-0066.

Halloween Bash 2009 at The Warehouse All Hip Hop Rap Show 5716 Ringgold Rd., East Ridge www.myspace.com/warehousetn Parkway Billiards Halloween Haunting The Icons, Planet, and River City Hustlers $6 October 30 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 265-POOL www.parkwaybilliards.com Blue Orleans Halloween Party With Mark Merriman October 31

Halloween Events 3208 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 629-6538. www.blueorleanscreolerestaurant.com The Palms Halloween Party With Dana Rogers October 31 6925 Shallowford Road, #202.

(423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com Ziggy’s Halloween Bash DJ Gruv Johnny Z and Chaotic Suspensions $6 8 p.m.

October 31 607 Cherokee Blvd.

(423) 634-1074. www.myspace.com/ziggyshideaway RiverHouse Halloween Party with Eris 9 p.m.

October 31 224 Frazier Ave. (423) 752-0066.

Midtown Halloween Bash Sloppy Roast Beef $7 10 p.m.

October 31 818 Georgia Ave. (423) 752-1977 www.midtownmusichall.com All Halloweener at Market Street Tavern Toneharm $5 October 31 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com 9th Annual Hallows Eve at Parkway Billiards The Bohannons, Big Kitty and Gringo Star $6 9 p.m.

October 31 35 Patten Pkwy.

(423) 265-POOL www.parkwaybilliards.com Unaversoul presents Scaryoke at Rhapsody Café 8 p.m.

October 31 1201 Hixson Pike (423) 266-3093.

Halloween Swing Dance At The Clear Story Music by Sweet Georgia Sounds $5 7 p.m. till 10 p.m.

October 31 400 E. Main St. (423) 316-7391 www.clearstory.com Hell Comes to the House of God

DJ SkiQueen, Forest Magic, MockinBird, Moonlight Bride $10 9 p.m.

October 31 Lindsay Street Hall, 901 Lindsay St. (423) 755-9111. www.lindsaystreethall.com Kissfits, Night of the Wolf, Rock Biter, Capt. Black, Bring The Witch $6 9 p.m.

October 31 JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia Halloween at Northshore Milele Roots 9 p.m.

October 31 Northshore Bar and Grille, 16 Frazier Ave. (423) 757-2000. www.northshoregrille.com Halloween Party at Bud’s Bud Lightning 10 p.m.

October 31 Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. www.budssportsbar.com

Halloween Trick or Treating

Solution To Last Week’s Puzzle

Hamilton Place Mall Free Mall Trick or Treating 2100 Hamilton Place Blvd Chattanooga, Tennessee October 31 at 6 p.m. www.hamiltonplace.com Bradley Square Mall Free Mall Trick or Treating 200 Paul Huff Parkway NW Cleveland, Tennessee October 31 at 6 p.m. www.shopbradleysquare.com Northgate Mall Free Mall Trick or Treating 271 Northgate Mall Chattanooga, Tennessee October 31 at 6 p.m. www.visitnorthgatemall.com

Trunk Or Treat Trinity Lutheran Church 5001 Hixson Pike Hixson, Tennessee October 30 from 5:30 p.m. – 7:30 p.m.

St. Mark United Methodist 701 Mississippi Avenue Chattanooga, Tennessee October 31 from 5 p.m. – 7 p.m.

Never Worry About Losing A Copy Of The Pulse Keep Up Online at www.chattanoogapulse.com 95.3 Pulse News www.chattanoogapulse.com 10.29.09 The Pulse

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On The Beat

Halloween: Can’t We Just Let It Go?

By Alex Teach

M

y night began as innocently as any other with my grabbing a Styrofoam cup from behind a display rack in which to pour a complimentary cup of old, burned coffee—and that was it. That was exactly how long my night lasted before it went to what sailors and cop-rologists would call “shit”. (Google it sometime; it’s a strong word.)

You see, the cups were next to the creamers and the creamers were necessary to take the edge off of what should be coffee, but like a politician’s good intentions, mostly wound up poorly planned and misspent crap. I reached up to make my choice for the night (I was leaning towards cinnamon hazelnut, actually) when my hand froze in space: The top tier of the creamer rack was filled with Pumpkin Spice Coffee Creamers, and Pumpkin Spice Coffee Creamers meant Halloween. I nearly vomited on the counter, and after the dry heaves subsided, I left without a word for the solace of my patrol car. I never even filled my cup.

Let me explain. To the average person, Halloween is a fairly innocuous holiday for children that leads to an overabundance of tiny plastic outfits, sugar comas, and a great deal of toilet paper being lodged in trees. At worst, it leads to the thick smoke of burning tires from roadway drainage tunnels or someone’s decision to get wildly intoxicated at a bar while wearing a one-inchthick mummy costume and lapsing

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into hyperthermia, but for cops? It’s not just the one night. It’s a whole freakin’ month of people running around with “Scream” masks robbing and stabbing the shit out of people in general. Now, don’t get me wrong: Who doesn’t love a good stabbing now and then? But a whole month of them? No, thank you, buddy.

It’s like open season for anonymous crimes all month, and not even good ones. Does anyone remember the guy in the “Spiderman” mask last year who went on a string of ten convenience store and hotel robberies?

Halloween mask.

The worst car pursuit of my career?

On the one night of the year that sanctifies little baby chirruns being led everywhere after dark with obstructed vision and irritated parents: Halloween. Only the Fourth of July rivals it in annoyance for police, but that’s only because of the inordinate amount of humorless and obnoxious people calling in to complain about people shooting fireworks on the Fourth of July, of all shocking things.

(It’s off topic, but I firmly believe those 911 callers should be subjected to a quick but painful electric shock for making such a phone call. I mean, complaining about fireworks in general on Independence Day? Why don’t we just kick Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny square in the crotch, you bitter and cheerless flag-burning assholes?)

Even off-duty it’s an issue. My girlfriend asked me to take her to a haunted house one year and I thought, “I’m a great and sensitive guy; sure, I’ll take her.” What could be better for our relationship than waiting a few hours in a freezing cold line of people who would otherwise be at

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a monster truck rally that ends with spending $60 dollars on two tickets to enter a barn filled with fake smoke and folks jumping out at you wearing face paint? I knew this going into it, but while I thought far enough ahead to chew a few leftover Vicodin to ease my patience a bit, I didn’t think far enough ahead to remember that I’d spent the last eight or 12 years being trained to attack people that jumped out at me, with or without face paint.

So there I was, surrounded in darkness, forcing myself every 45 to 60 seconds not to lunge forward and choke the shit out of all these people coming at me from behind corners and fake coffins, violating years of instincts and muscle memory, and ultimately starting to freak out fairly badly because I was also instinctually defending my girlfriend from threats I perceived during working hours that usually ended badly for other folks in real life.

I left the place in a fine sweat and with gritted teeth I had to pass off as a “tired smile”.

Ah, yes, “October.” I am aware that it will eventually pass, but so do kidney stones, folks. Who am I to be a party-pooper though? Trick or Treat, beloved readers.

Next year maybe we can show you what’s under Officer Teach’s mask?

I’ll bring the gloves…you bring the gauze.

The coffee, of course, is always on the house.

When officer Alexander D. Teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he is an occasional student at UTC, an up and coming carpenter, auto mechanic, prominent boating enthusiast, and spends his spare time volunteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center.

“Ah, yes, ‘October’. I am aware that it will eventually pass, but so do kidney stones, folks. Who am I to be a partypooper though?

Trick or Treat, beloved readers.”