The Pulse - Vol. 7, Issue 27

Chattanooga’s Weekly Alternative

Hot Time, Art

Simmers in the City

By Veronique Bergeron

FREE • News, Views, Music, Film, Arts & Entertainment • July 8, 2010 • Volume 7, Issue 27 • www.chattanoogapulse.com

President Jim Brewer, II Publisher Zachary Cooper Contributing Editor Janis Hashe News Editor / Art Director Gary Poole Advertising Manager Rhonda Rollins Advertising Sales Rick Leavell, Leif Sawyer, Townes Webb Graphic Design Jennifer Grelier Staff Photographer Louis Lee Contributing Writers Gustavo Arellano, Veronique Bergeron Rob Brezsny, Chuck Crowder Michael Crumb, Rebecca Cruz Chris Hillespie, Hellcat, Joshua Hurley Matt Jones, Ernie Paik Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D. Stephanie Smith, Alex Teach Editorial Cartoonist Rick Baldwin Calendar Editors Bryanna Burns, Josh Lang Editorial Assistant Sean Lee Contact Info: Phone (423) 265-9494 Fax (423) 266-2335 Email Inquiries info@chattanoogapulse.com Calendar Submissions calendar@chattanoogapulse.com The Pulse is published weekly and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publishers may take more than one copy per weekly issue.

The Pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors.

The Pulse is published by

Brewer Media 1305 Carter Street Chattanooga, Tennessee 37402 Letters to the editor must include name, address and daytime phone number for verification. The Pulse reserves the right to edit letters for space and clarity. Please keep letters within 300 words in length.

The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on culture, the arts, entertainment and local news.

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Chattanooga’s Weekly Alternative

AL NG L se NU WI AL Pul AN LO TB he L U T FO E F k in

JULY

10 HOT TIME, ART SIMMERS IN THE CITY

By Veronique Bergeron Summer in Chattanooga is no time to hop, and although many galleries close their doors for the season, there are quite a few offering rewards for those brave enough to battle the elements.

From emerging to established, local to international, in July, Chattanooga’s galleries feature work for every type of artists, for every type of viewer.

feature stories

Artwork by Kelly Jean Ohl from "Senations" at River Gallery

14 DOUBLE WHAT? RICHARD WHO?

By Hellcat If you are the kind of person the local cops recognize, or if they predictably show up at the majority of your parties, then you probably already know about the band I am about to speak of.

20 ACCESS TO KNOWLEDGE

By Michael Crumb We are living in the “information age,” and the accumulation of information, as well as the acceleration of that accumulation, continues to overwhelm us. Is it possible now to read all the good books?

26 THE OLD WEST THROUGH ITALIAN EYES

By Janis Hashe Even non-fans of the “spaghetti western”—the genre that emerged in the ’60s creating a European fantasy of the American West—recognize how iconic some of its images are. Seemingly, most of these films starred Clint Eastwood—and in The Spagehtti West, Eastwood is indeed front and snarling center.

news & views 5 6 8 18 24 30

PULSE BEATS BEYOND THE HEADLINES SHRINK RAP LIFE IN THE NOOG ON THE BEAT ASK A MEXICAN

everything else 4 5 7 15 16 21 25 27 28 28 29 29

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR CITY COUNCILSCOPE POLICE BLOTTER NEW MUSIC REVIEWS MUSIC CALENDAR A&E CALENDAR DINING OUT SPOTLIGHT NEW IN THEATERS SPIRITS WITHIN FREE WILL ASTROLOGY JONESIN’ CROSSWORD JOY STICK

Letters to the Editor Sandy The Flower Man This is a beautiful heartwarming story [“Sandy’s Pure-D Miracle”, Beyond The Headlines]. I live in Rome, GA so I have never had the honor of meeting Sandy, nor the pleasure of receiving a flower from him, but I do know him from across the miles through family who speak very highly of him. I have also read many stories of the joy he has brought people on Facebook. Yes, Sandy the flower man has a fan page! I only hope that all the people whose lives he has touched show up in droves to support this effort to help Sandy with his medical bills.

The world needs more people like him, people who light up the lives of others with the pure and simple love they so freely give. I also hope that his daughter Angela will be able to make the trip back to Chattanooga to spend some time with her father, because seeing the identical smiles on their faces and the thrill in their eyes is just pure-D beauty! Great story Cody, I always look forward to seeing Chattanooga through your eyes.

Jackie Hampton

Budget Priorities Instead of giving city employees their first raise in nine years, the City Council instead is raising their taxes, and ours.

Why? The mayor and council spend based on their priorities, not ours. That’s a lot of contracts and giveaways for their inner circle; and high-end jobs for the mayor’s cronies. And what about our priorities: schools, roads, emergency services and justly compensated city workers? Officials use our budget like a slush fund. Money for private contracts, parties, art and jobs flow in the form of non-budgeted “resolutions.” Despite having city departments staffed for engineering, laying asphalt and mowing, our politicians contract many of those services out.

Lana Sutton Reasonable Teach?

Closely reasoned, balanced and well thought out [“Public Perception”, On The Beat]. Your friends and admirers will be unsurprised. Your carping critics will be confounded...if they read the

whole column; attention spans are not equal amongst the peanut gallery. This thoughtful examination of police/the rest of us relationship is the best thing to come out of the Red Light Follies.

Felix Miller Bugs Are Biting The mosquitoes are eating us alive! They are all over the place. Why isn’t the city or county spraying for them?

Susan Nicholas No Hats, Just Bats Due to unforeseen circumstances, the Lookouts Hat Night Giveaway, which was originally scheduled for Friday, July 9th, has been rescheduled to occur on Saturday, August 28th. Fireworks, however, will still be featured at the conclusion of the game on July 9th.

The Lookouts would like to apologize for any inconveniences caused by this rescheduling.

Pete Intzá Director of Media Relations Chattanooga Lookouts

Send all letters to the editor and questions to info@chattanoogapulse.com We reserve the right to edit letters for content and space. Please include your full name, city and contact information.

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The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Pulse Beats

Quote Of The Week:

A rundown of the newsy, the notable, and the notorious...

“We tend to be a very inactive state, and Southerners’ diet is still heavy on fat and light on fruits and vegetables.”

—Dr. Gregory Heath, member of the Tennessee task force on obesity, after a national report came out ranking Tennessee as the second most-obese state in the nation, behind only Mississippi.

Volunteers Sought For Dizzy Dean World Series The East Ridge Baseball Association is seeking volunteers for the upcoming Dizzy Dean World Series to be held July 15 to 22 at Camp Jordan. The tournament is anticipated to bring 5,000 fans from 15 states.

Volunteers are needed for field preparation, trash detail, parking and other items.

Volunteers are needed from 4 to 9 p.m. on July 14 for opening ceremonies and from 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. July 15 through the 21 for the tournament. Four-hour shifts are open for volunteers, and citizens may volunteer for

more than one shift. All volunteers must be 18 years of age or older.

Those interested in volunteering should contact Shawnna Skiles, East Ridge Community Center Director, at (423) 867-6406 or via email at sskiles@eastridgetn.org, no later than July 12.

If you’re interested in learning more about the Dizzy Dean tournament itself, please contact Kevin Wright, Commissioner of East Ridge Baseball and Softball, at (423) 320-0001 or visit astridgebaseball.org

Moore for Less Music for the MLK Neighborhood (Lobbyists) The local chapter of MoveOn.org is sponsoring a screening of Michael Moore’s Capitalism: A Love Story on July 8. The film will be shown at green|spaces, 63 E. Main St., at 6 p.m.

According to MoveOn’s Harriet Cotter, “We’re showing the film as part of our summer campaign, ‘The Other 98 Percent.’ The campaign’s goals are to kick corporate lobbyists out of DC, hold our elected officials accountable, and fix our democracy to make Washington work for the 98 percent of us who don’t have corporate lobbyists.”

The screening is free and all are welcome.

Local music buff and neighborhood activist Collin Monk has been working with the MLK Neighborhood Association on M.U.S.I.C. Chattanooga. The initials stand for “MLK United Sound Investment Coalition”, and the plan is to bring music back to the neighborhood where it once thrived.

The “Proposed Action Plan” includes: • Acquire multi-use space for music recording and events.

• Use activities to attract attention and tenants to adjacent available space.

• Expand coalition to include other property owners in target area • Establish significant interaction with UTC and Hamilton County schools music programs.

To accomplish this, the group needs funding and support during a 2-to-5 year incubation period, so, it has registered the project with the nationwide Pepsi Refresh program, in which people vote online for projects they want to see funded. M.U.S.I.C. Chattanooga is hoping to secure a $50,000 grant.

To help, go to www.refresheverything.com, search for “Bring Music Back to the MLK Neighborhood” and vote. You can vote once a day during the rest of July.

For more information about the project, contact Monk at collinmonk@gmail.com

Here is one of the more interesting agenda items set to be discussed at the Tuesday, July 13 meeting of the Chattanooga City Council.

7. Resolutions: a. A resolution authorizing the Chief of Police to apply for and accept a grant from the Office of Community oriented policing services (COPS) which is funded under the COPS Hiring Recovery Program in the amount of $4,015,156.00 which will be used to hire twenty-three (23) police officers and pay their salaries for three years. The City of Chattanooga will be required to fund these positions one year beyond the expiration of the grant.

As it is well known by now, the Chattanooga Police Department is rather understaffed. Anything that can help bring the staffing levels back up is welcome, especially a program that would help add 23 officers at a quarter of the price. And hopefully four years down the road the economy will have improved enough that keeping all 23 officers on payroll won’t break the budget.

The Chattanooga City Council meets each Tuesday at 6 p.m. in the City Council Building at 1000 Lindsay St. For more information on the agenda and minutes from past meetings, visit www.

Chattanooga.gov/City_Council/110_Agenda.asp

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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Beyond The Headlines

The Idea is Only the Beginning I

t isn’t even my own idea I’m taking through the Stand and Deliver: Safety’s Action Lab later this month, it’s my coworker and friend, Keith Landecker’s.

Actually, it’s more than an idea. It’s a program already making an impact on kids in our community.

By Rebecca Cruz

“This is our community, they’re our kids, and it’s our problem to solve. The next biggest obstacle will be to get all the right people to the table.”

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Keith and another coach founded the Babe Ruth /Cal Ripkin Baseball League a few years ago, (described in a previous “Beyond the Headlines”), when they saw a huge need in their neighborhoods for positive activities for young boys, especially between the ages of 12 to 15 years old.

I don’t even know that much about baseball.

I know the basics, just enough to be able to enjoy an occasional Braves game, or to know that my 10-year-old son, Caleb, being a “switch-hitter” is a good thing, since it means he can hit a baseball right- or left-handed.

So what business do I have with this idea that expanding this Youth Baseball Program throughout Chattanooga will have any kind of positive impact on our youth, and, ultimately, reduce crime in our community?

I’m sure that seems a lofty goal to many.

But here’s the thing—it’s about more than baseball! The Babe Ruth/Cal Ripkin League is a brilliantly simple way in which positive male role models are building relationships with preteen boys who need them. As these boys are learning how to hit and pitch better, and run

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

faster, they’re also learning something much more valuable: life lessons of all kinds, such as how to be a team player, how to work hard on the field as well as in the classroom, how hard work is not only important, it’s essential, race relations, patience, respect for oneself, as well as for others…it goes on and on. I might have had a hard time believing one program could do so much—if I hadn’t already seen and heard the proof: the players who’ve raised their grades exponentially since they started playing baseball a few years ago, the kids who now are looking forward to their futures. They have futures. That, in itself, is priceless.

Most of the boys playing in the Babe Ruth/ Cal Ripkin Baseball League live in singleparent homes, many without a male role— much less a positive male role model—most don’t have a way to get back and forth to practice and games, so, Coach Keith transports many of his players to and from home, games and practices. They live in the “undesirable” neighborhoods... neighborhoods they need to get out of every chance they get.

There are others like them all over Chattanooga and Hamilton County. Don’t buy into the baseball program as a way to make a difference? Think about it this way: in its simplest of forms, a community-wide sports program would, if nothing else, give kids something positive to do with their time. Isn’t that, by itself, worth all the effort?

Since I took the organizers of Stand up on their offer that “everyone has something to contribute,” I decided my contribution would be to take the Babe Ruth/ Cal Ripkin Baseball League as far as it would go through the Action Lab process, with the ultimate goal of expanding this program communitywide.

So far, the process hasn’t been easy—but it

has been rewarding. On one hand, it seems like every path I take ends up at a wall and another reason it can’t be done. “We already tried that,” “We can’t even use the recreation center in our neighborhood,” “You can only use the field if you supply the field maintenance, as well as security,” are among things I hear on a fairly regular basis.

On the other hand, I have also discovered many other people who are attempting to launch similar programs. And even more want to have similar programs in their own neighborhoods, but don’t have the avenues to pursue such programs.

The bottom line is this: Right now, there are enough people in Chattanooga who realize we need to do something. We can’t just all sit back and expect incoming Police Chief Bobby Dodd to solve our crime problem, we can’t blame the city council and the mayor or the Parks and Recreation Department for not having enough staff to leave parks and centers open at all hours when kids most need a safe place to play, This is our community, they’re our kids, and it’s our problem to solve. The next biggest obstacle will be to get all the right people to the table—the people we’ll need to expand this program range from coaches who want to mentor kids, to lawn-maintenance workers who might be willing to volunteer their work, to organizations willing to let deserving kids use their fields to, not only to play baseball, but to use their free time to learn life lessons that will allow them, perhaps, to give back one day.

If you’d like to help with this program, or, if you have your own idea that could impact our community, or to find out how to get involved, e-mail rebecca@brewermediagroup.com.Visit createhere.org for more information about Stand & Deliver: Safety.

A weekly roundup of the newsworthy, notable and often head-scratching stories gleaned from police reports from the Chattanooga Police Department, the Hamilton County Sheriff’s Office, the Bradley County Sheriff’s Department and the Dalton Police Department.

• Most drug arrest stories these days revolve around methamphetamine, cocaine or marijuana. Which is why it was a bit surprising when Hamilton County narcotics officers concluded a four-month investigation into a local heroin distribution ring with several arrests. Three people were arrested this past weekend on charges of possession of heroin for resale. An official said the charges are the result of an undercover operation that led to a well-organized heroin ring located here in Chattanooga as well as other cities in the region.

And while heroin use is statistically quite small in the area, it is still a very dangerous drug that has seen a slight resurgence in popularity, especially among younger people.

• With the warm weather months here, a lot of people enjoy going to the local parks wearing as little clothing as possible to beat the heat. Some, however, have taken their clothing choices to an extreme. Such as the man who was discovered by park rangers at Chester Frost Park sitting completely

naked in the front seat of his SUV. Authorities say they found the 49-year-old wearing “only a newspaper” as he sat quietly in his vehicle at the popular county park. He admitted to officers that he had done this before but didn’t see how he was hurting anyone. He was taken into custody and charged with indecent exposure.

• When many of us were kids, our mothers would use the old line, “If your friends jumped off a bridge, would you?” Well, two young men apparently took that question to heart as they jumped off the north end of the Walnut Street Bridge “for fun”. Witnesses say the pair jumped into the river, swam to shore and then ran towards the Theatre Centre, where they got in a white sedan. Officers were able to stop the pair a few blocks away and called EMS. One of the jumpers was transported to the hospital, though one official noted that he wasn’t so injured after his jump that he couldn’t swim and run. As of press time, authorities were still undecided on whether to file charges against the two.

The List Top Ten Top Selling Video Games This Week

• And what would you do if you saw a man running after a woman on a busy road? Police were called out to Bonny Oaks Drive after a 911 call was made about a man apparently chasing a woman down the side of the street. After a short search, officers found both the man and the woman… and discovered that far from it being a chase situation, the two were merely exercising. Still, even though this was a case of mistaken intention, it is nice to know that people are still willing to “get involved” when they see something they feel is suspicious. Though maybe in the future, the 911 caller will learn to identify joggers.

1. Red Dead Redemption: An openworld, third-person, action-adventure game set at the tail end of the American West era.

2. Crackdown 2: Be judge, jury, and executioner for a huge, fully explorable city.

3. New Super Mario Bros: For the Wii crowd, Mario is back and better than ever.

4. Super Mario Galaxy 2: For an Italian plumber, Mario sure knows how to sell video games.

5. LEGO Harry Potter: Years 1-4: The entire line of LEGO games has become some of the most popular, and bestselling video games.

6. Just Dance: Shake your groove thing, shake your groove thing, oh yeah.

7. Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2: A first-person tactical shooter and the sixth entry in the popular “Call of Duty” series.

8. God of War III: The final installment of the extremely successful “God of War” trilogy.

9. 2010 FIFA World Cup: Maybe this time, the U.S. team will do better. Or not.

10. Mario Kart: Makes driving the Ridge Cut every day seem easy in comparison.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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Shrink Rap

By Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D

Doing What Feels Good!

Whenever I return home, I am met, as you all know by now, by my

“Turn toward

what feels good, and go fill up on that. Whether it’s something simple or grand doesn’t matter.”

Dr. Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D., is a psychotherapist, minister, and educator, in private practice in Chattanooga, and the author of “Empowering the Tribe” and “The Power of a Partner.” Visit his new wellness center, Well Nest, at www.

WellNestChattanooga.com, and his web site at www.DrRPH.com

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four-legged bundle of fur, goofiness, and nub-wagging, Miss Betty Lou. Even when she’s left all alone while I’m working or out for an evening, she couldn’t be more generous with her sloppy kisses and nuzzling—she’s just so happy to see me when I return. She’s not upset that I left; she’s glad I came back! I consider her an excellent model for human friends, a significant other, and any other human creatures we might spend a lot of time with.

One of the great benefits to having unconditionally loving people (and other critters) in your life is how they have the power to provide stress-relief…instantly and without medication. It’s why dogs are brought into nursing homes, and why studies now show the physiological benefits to simply petting your pet: lowered blood pressure and heart rate, relaxed breathing, and an overall feeling of wellbeing.

So aside from surrounding yourself with wonderful creatures, human and otherwise, let me ask you: What feels good to you? Curling up with a great book, having lunch with a pal, travel, bowling, an intimate evening with your sig other, a quiet bubble bath; hiking, watching old movies?

Find out and do that. And do it as often

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

as is realistically possible. What and who makes you laugh? Doesn’t it just make good sense to surround yourself with these people and experiences as much as you can? And to minimize what brings you down, hurts your sense of self-worth, fills your brain with negativity?

We know all this intellectually—it’s common sense, right?—but is there a “disconnect” between what you know in your mind and what you live in your life?

Work stress, money stress, relationship stress, health stress, on and on. I get it.

You get it. We all get it and have to deal with it the best we can. So my suggestion is that every chance you get, take a breath, and turn in another direction. Turn toward what feels good, and go fill up on that. Whether it’s something simple or grand doesn’t matter, because here’s what will likely result: Happiness instead of depression, and centeredness instead of fear.

A friend sent me the following and I want to share it with you: A lecturer when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, “How heavy is this glass of water?”

Answers called out ranged from one pound to four pounds.

The lecturer replied, “The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it.

“If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm.

“If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call

an ambulance. In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.”

He continued, “And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on.

“As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again. When we're refreshed, we can carry on. So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down.

Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow.”

And from another friend, a few humorous ways of dealing with the stressors of life: • Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

• If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

• If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

• It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to be kind to others.

• Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.

• The second mouse gets the cheese.

• A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

And until next week: “You may be only one person in the world, but you may be the world to one person.” — author unknown

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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Cover Story

Hot Time, Art

Painting by John Kelly

Simmers in the City

By Veronique Bergeron

Summer in Chattanooga is no time to hop, and although many galleries close their doors for the season, there are quite a few offering rewards for those brave enough to battle the elements. From emerging to established, local to international, in July, Chattanooga’s galleries feature work for every type of artists, for every type of viewer.

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Cover Story “Not all artists are running around, painting janky pieces on the walls of businesses or scribbling on churches or writing their name in etching fluid on a store window.”

Keeping It Alive: A Street Art Installation Asher Love Studio + Gallery 3914 St. Elmo Avenue, Suite G (423) 822-0289 July 10, 2010 – August 29, 2010 Opening Event: July 10, 6 –9 p.m.

Asher Love Studio + Gallery hosts a site-specific exhibition called “Keeping It Alive;” opening July 10 in St. Elmo and running through August 29. “Keeping It Alive” features the work of graffiti artist Sourone, who will paint directly on the walls of the space. The show also includes significantly more mobile pieces: signage, found object and canvas works, and a wall of broken televisions, tagged and stenciled.

Sour’s work starts with the common (if recently less-held belief) that graffiti is a singular act of vandalism. That stigma is what drives much of his work, both in process and exhibition. “Graffiti isn’t all about destroying things,” he says.

“Unfortunately, that’s the first thing that comes to people’s minds.”

Sour is a former Chattanoogan currently living in Atlanta, and “Keeping It Alive” is his first gallery exhibition. For Mary Barnett, the studio’s curator, and Sour alike, it’s an opportunity to push the art form into a conversation that legitimizes it locally.

“Not all [graffiti] artists are running around, painting janky pieces on the walls of businesses or scribbling on churches or writing their name in etching fluid on a store window,” says Sour.

“There are plenty of people doing great things in a respectful way.”

According to Barnett, Sour usually creates work in the off-the-beaten path environment of street artists: under bridges, on trains, and in other hardto-get-to corners of cities. For the

exhibition, he’s been given free rein of the space. Part of the studio will be dedicated to recreating the environment Sour works in, day in, day out.

In being true to graffiti’s birth in the urban environment, Sour’s work is inspired by architecture, the uncomfortable intersection of nature with the built world, and graffiti’s hallmark: the letter form.

“The goal is for the space to look like it’s been tagged over and over again for many years,” says Barnett. “Beautiful graffiti exists in places we don’t normally interact with. Largely, it’s appreciated by purveyors of street culture: they’re the only ones who can see it as artists look for new, untagged spaces.” For this exhibition, however, that will not be the case.

But Sour’s work is deeply personal as well. The son of a graphic and tattoo artist, Sour explains that he’s been interacting with the visual arts his whole life, even before he learned to write. “My father and I were lost in Atlanta, looking for a skate shop, and I happened to spot a HazeAM7 piece in a legal yard I’d later spend countless hours painting with my dad,” he says. “The colors, the shape, the structure—everything about the piece was so intriguing.” Three years later, he was painting.

Sour is quick to admit that his earliest work as a 13-year-old graffiti artist is laughable. Only after sifting through various letter styles and numerous names did he arrive where he is today. Even now, Sour is his own toughest critic and sees room for improvement in every piece he creates.

“I never want to just stop moving forward—I’d rather try 50 new things and fail 45 of those times than never try something new. Those five successes are why I do what I do.” www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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Cover Story “From the literal visualization of this concept in photography, Winn and Swenson collected objects, personal as well as found, to create a less palpable story that addresses journeys as well. ” Photographic Works by Swinnson Leo Handmade Gallery 22 Frazier Avenue (423) 634-7755 Through July 30, 2010 Leo Handmade is a retail shop and gallery on the Northshore featuring handmade (and often locally-made) products exclusively. The space features work from a different artist or duo monthly. This month, Laura Winn and Kevin Swenson, graphic design and painting/drawing majors at UTC respectively, team up to present photographic works and an installation piece under their collaborative pseudonym, Swinnson.

The show starts with richly layered photography, the staging of which involved huge skeins of white string and several wild landscapes.

The pair threaded themselves to rocks and trees, and both describe the experience of it as highly performative.

“A friend of mine inspired this work,” says Winn. “All of us understand the idea of paths in life, but this friend imagines them as ropes of white string. It is rare that we struggle to visualize something so shared. It really intrigued Kevin and I.” “We were out in the woods shooting and even just the process [of staging the images] was so closely tied to our concept. We’d each lead the photographs a certain way,” says

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Swenson.

As emerging artists, it is not surprising that Winn and Swenson’s work focuses on futures, known and unknown. “Kevin and I are both interested in the intuitive paths you take in life,” Winn says. “We can’t see time, and can’t see what five years from now looks like, but we understand the way to these things is a path nonetheless.”

From the literal visualization of this concept in photography, Winn and Swenson collected objects, personal as well as found, to create a less palpable story that addresses journeys as well. Among those pieces are letters, photos, and keepsakes. “It’s like visiting your grandparents’ house and finding a box full of secrets. That’s the atmosphere we wanted to create,” says Winn.

“The show is full of objects that are important to Laura, but also found pieces that could have been important to others,” says Swenson. “We won’t know, but what’s important is the evocative nature of the small things that surround us.”

The pair have worked together on creative projects for a little over six months, and though this is Winn’s second public exhibition, it is Swenson’s first, as well as the duo’s premier.

As for their nontraditional hosts at Leo Handmade, Winn said the venue is a perfect fit. “The fact that Leo is both retail and gallery is a good tribute to the use of space,” says Winn.

Cover Story Sensation River Gallery 402 East 2nd Street (423) 265-5033 Through July 31, 2010 The Bluff View Arts District’s River Gallery presents work from three nonlocal artists throughout the month of July.

“Sensation” features pieces by Tatiana Hill of Georgia, John Kelley of Alabama, and Kelly Jean Ohl of Minnesota. What connects these decidedly diverse artists is their preoccupation with different environments, and that is where “Sensation” draws its landscape theme.

Hill’s work is notable for its use of unusual glazing techniques, which lend significant luminosity to each painting. Originally from Venezuela, Hill’s work in “Sensation” is evocative of our own Tennessee Valley, in color, form, and temperature.

Kelley’s pastel paintings are full of optimism and traditionalism, with titles like “The Old Way” and “By The Bend.”

The exhibition pieces are all treescapes that draw their moods from a shifting, though sometimes singular palette.

Ohl’s work is distinct from that of the two other participants in “Sensation” in that she is a ceramics artist, and uses found objects and household items to cast impressions into clay. The result is a landscape evoked, rather than directly represented. Her sculptural work is organic yet foreign, almost submarine, but undoubtedly based in the intersection of mood and place.

Together, these artists bring an organic, and even muted, mood to a gallery space that just one month ago featured bright, industrial works.

Team Lump: Skins & Skeletons Association for Visual Arts (AVA) Gallery 30 Frazier Avenue (423) 265-4282 Through August 27, 2010 This summer, the Association for Visual Arts (AVA) presents work from Team Lump, an artist collective based out of Raleigh, NC. Founded by Bill Thelen 14 years ago, the team fluctuates on a project-to-project basis as new artists are “curated” into the group.

For “Skins and Skeletons”, a team of five artists

collaborated to produce a single, large structure that occupies the better part of AVA’s Frazier Avenue gallery space.

According to Tory Wright, Lump team member and one of the artists who contributed to the AVA exhibition, “Skins and Skeletons” is a response to the idea of a sculpture garden, as interpreted by each of the participants. “[In the collective] we tend to start very organically,” says Wright. “We’ll see who we want to work with, who’s around, and we’ll start to brainstorm. A few of us have always wanted to do a sculpture garden, but in a less high brow way.”

Each of the artists has struggled with the concept of public art, and the final piece speaks to that. The large table-like work features a mock-up of what a Team Lump sculpture garden would look like, with a built environment attached to it where viewers can watch a video installation. “We each had a lot of freedom with our practices,” Wright continues.

Team Lump has garnered a host of accolades, and the group’s work has been exhibited in London, New York, Philadelphia, Atlanta, and Seattle. The group is dedicated to supporting the work of emerging and mid-career artists, and is known for producing works that combine sculpture, paintings, drawings, and video, in addition to site-specific wall drawings and installation pieces. In their own words, the works are “laden with biting commentary.”

Wright has been working with Team Lump for eight years, and is joined in this show by Thelen, David Colgiavanni, Rich McIssac, Megan Sullivan, and Gerscin Crousy.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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Music Feature

Double What? Richard Who? I

f you are the kind of person the local cops recognize, or if they predictably show up at the majority of your parties, then you probably already know about the band I am about to speak of.

By Hellcat

“We’ve added keyboards to the band now, and are concentrating on being tight instead of destroying instruments.”

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Double Dick Slick as a concept was formed in 1995 and came together in 1997. The band started off as a drunken jam band. By jam band, I don’t mean dudes that wear visors and bracelets; I mean the type of band that forms by hanging out, drinking a few beers, and then picking up an instrument.

Jeff Daughtery, DDS front man, stated that they just wanted an “effed-up” band, which was hardcore but retarded. Striving towards the retarding of music is a goal that only DDS could get away with. Being the type of person that I am, I had to ask about the band name. Where did it come from? It sounds dirty…is it dirty?

Well, as the story goes, the original drummer, Tony, had seen an adult magazine that featured a man on the cover, with two packages, all to himself. Tony was impressed with this display and said the guy was “slick” before putting the name together. OK…so the name is exactly what it says. But here is the funny part. The guys, presently, 15 years after the name originated, have been faced with the hard reality of being grown ups and having families.

As you might have guessed, explaining the band name, what it means, and where it came from to your niece, grandmother, or in-laws, might prove difficult. It’s difficult for me to even write about. Most of the members just say DDS and offer no explanation to what it means. Jeff, at 34, has figured out a way to explain it to those who may be offended by the truth. He made

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

up an entire book that doesn’t exist to facilitate a more politically correct, or conservative alternative origin of the band name. The “book” is entitled Richard Slick’s Dual Identity.

In the story, Richard Slick is a schizophrenic who is battling with a multiple personality. The local people in Richard’s town, start referring to him as “Double Dick Slick”, which, of course, branches off into yet another personality of its own. I can only assume that this third personality likes to play hardcore music. I find it both clever and endearing that such a grizzly guy has gone to such lengths to protect the gentle hearts of his older fans and family. Personally, I think someone needs to just go ahead and write the book. “We thought about changing the name,” says Jeff, “but then you have to start all over. I think it has cost us some gigs out of town, but I mean, it was worth keeping for the local recognition. We’ve tried playing under other names, but we don’t get the same turn out. If we say the new band features members of DDS, then they want to hear DDS songs. So, we just kept the name.”

Yet another claim to fame, for this band, is the extremely “hardcore” nature of the fans. “We’ve always had problems with people trying to get a little too wild at our shows. We’ve actually had to stop playing and call 911,” says Daughtery.

Whoa. (Be honest—at least two of you reading this just got excited and decided to come out this weekend. I know it.) Moshing seems to happen, with or without the band’s approval, and I have personally had to throw an idiot or two away from the ladies. But it generally turns out to be an awesome time.

However, their reputation precedes them.

DDS has had moshing accidents that have left people unconscious. In 2000, they had four cop cars, two ambulances, and a rescue squad called out to one of their shows, after an enraged security guard beat down an unruly patron with

a mag light. Cops have shown up to more of their shows than not, and on several occasions, ambulances have been necessary.

As far as I know, they are one of the few local bands that are forever banned from Riverbend.

“We’re just a bunch of Soddy Daisy ruffians,” says Jeff, “so I guess, the fans think they are supposed to act like idiots at our show, which we really wish they wouldn’t. We’ve also gotten a bad rap for being tough on equipment. We aren’t so much anymore. I guess we’ve mended some fences and shown everyone that we’ve matured a little bit. We’re a lot tighter now, musically. The sound has changed. Matt played a very poppy, slappy bass, whereas Chris (Eves, bassist) plays a simple bass. My acrobatics aren’t as extreme, because I’m old and out of breath.

We’ve added keyboards to the band now, and are concentrating on being tight instead of destroying instruments. We’re going to keep this thing going, one way or another. We’ve been recording and then re-recording because ol’ Tim (Medlin, keyboards/recording) over here is a perfectionist.” Robert Oyer on drums, Jason Reed on guitar, and Rich Howell on sax, complete the band. Hopefully, we will soon see the fruits of their efforts. The band would like to let everyone out there know that they protest Van Irion, on the principle of “too much signage in East Ridge”, and urge everyone to come out this weekend, as Reed, will be celebrating his birthday. They are playing with Daikaiju and Not This Cowboy this Saturday at JJ’s Bohemia.

Double Dick Slick with Daikaju and Not This Cowboy $7 10 p.m., Saturday, July 10 JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia

New Music Reviews

By Ernie Paik & Stephanie Smith

Tracey Thorn

Grace Potter

Love and Its Opposite

Grace Potter and The Nocturnals

(Merge)

(Hollywood Records) Apparently, middle-aged romantic despair can induce as much anxiety as teenage romantic despair, as demonstrated on Everything But the Girl member Tracey Thorn’s third and latest solo album, Love and Its Opposite. Sure, the raging hormones of adolescence can intensify emotions, but Thorn sings “Yours are just kicking in, mine are just checking out,” as a parent to her daughter on the bouncy “Hormones,” later revealing an uneasy bewilderment. One expects to become wiser as one gets older, but things seem to just get more confusing.

Thorn ponders “Who’s next?” in “Oh, the Divorces!” and the messiness of child custody and legal bills, accompanied by a waltz-time piano, plaintive pizzicato notes, and string accents; the quasi-Broadway title and torch song style give it a sort of odd tragic-comedy feel, with lines like “He was a charmer / I wish him bad karma,” balanced with honest, universal sighs, like “I know we shouldn’t take sides.”

However, the track “Singles Bar” doesn’t quite work, with a lyrical obviousness that doesn’t enlighten the song’s desperation, with questions like “Can you guess my age in this light?”

One highlight, the closing number “Swimming,” offers a rare optimistic glimpse, with the line, “Right now we are just keeping afloat, but soon we’ll be swimming,” with hopeful cymbal swells, shimmering electronics, and youthful backing vocals from Cortney Tidwell channeling Björk. “Come on Home to Me,” one of the album’s two covers, is a Lee Hazlewood song sung with Jens Lekman; typically, covering Hazlewood is a safe move, but the mysterious, atmospheric number feels out of place here.

Love and Its Opposite follows 2007’s Out of the Woods and only occasionally borrows its electro-dance feel approach; both are far away from Thorn’s debut, the small-yet-perfect album A Distant Shore from 1982, with a strippeddown guitar/voice approach. The album sports a loose theme, but it doesn’t quite gel, with not enough distinctive features to really draw the listener into its jumbled world. Thorn seems to be conflicted, torn between her wistful, lyrically oriented side and her more insistent, electronic side. “Why Does the Wind?” leans firmly toward the dance-floor-stomper approach, but its lyrics simply don’t stick with the listener. Not taking sides can be difficult, indeed. — EP

If you missed her at Riverbend or, God forbid, you’ve never heard her before, then here’s your chance to be introduced to the talented rocker Grace Potter and her band, The Nocturnals. The band’s self-titled fifth album, Grace Potter & The Nocturnals, distributed by Hollywood Records was released on June 8.

Grace Potter & The Nocturnals is one of the best albums I have heard this year. Part of the reason is the talent of the band. Grace herself jumps from guitar to keyboards to organ with seeming ease, while the band is comprised of various talented versatile performers, each able to switch styles at the drop of a hat.

Another part is that voice. If Mick Jagger and Janis Joplin had a lovechild, her name would be Grace Potter. Soulful, pining, screeching and always sounding as if she laid her vocal chords out on the chopping block, Potter’s powerhouse voice is more than noteworthy; if I were a rock songwriter, I would want her to sing everything I wrote.

The rest of the reason I love this album is because of the frequent retro-rock stylistic changes. Unlike her first album, Original Soul, which, though complex, has a truly gutsy-bluesy sound, this album is more difficult to describe— rock’n’roll seems too broad a genre. The best way I can think of to describe this album is this: If you have liked any rock’n’roll music during the last 50 years, then you will find something to like on this CD. From Jim Morrison to Eric Clapton to The Thunderbirds to John Lennon, both the songwriting and instrumentals are fond tributes to the great legends that came before.

“Medicine” could come straight off a Rolling Stones album, while “Colors” is a contemporary “Imagine.” At times the guitar is a little Santana, the organ a little Deep Purple and the drums a little Max Weinberg (a la Bruce Springsteen).

This is what makes the album special: Potter’s ability to invent her own style while at the same time referencing great rock artists of the past.

The end result is an album of new and old, retro and contemporary rock music that is wildly appealing and a must-have addition to any rocker’s collection. — Stephanie L. Smith

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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Music Calendar Thursday Spotlight

Paleface, Frontier Ruckus, Ian Thomas Duo Paleface is anti-indiefolkie-Americana. Word. $7 10 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia

Thursday Jimmy Harris 7:30 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202.

(423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com Frontier Ruckus, Deadmalls & Nightfalls 9 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia Tim Lewis and Reece 9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.com Open Mic with Gabriel Newell 9 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com All Request Video Music with DJ Spicolli and Cat Daddy 9 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919 Karaoke Dance Party with DJ Smith 9 p.m. Bourbon St. Music Bar, 2000 E. 23rd St. (423) 697-9957 Soul Sessions 10 p.m. Table 2, 232 East 11th St. (423) 756-8253.

DJ ScubaSteve Fox and Hound Pub & Grille, 2040 Hamilton Place Blvd #150.

(423) 490-1200.

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The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Friday Spotlight

DJ Lucky Lucky’s, 2536 Cummings Highway, (423) 825-5145.

Friday MeloManiacs 6 p.m. Bluff View Art District, Terrazine between Tony’s and Back Inn Café, 411 E. 2nd St. (423) 265-5033.

Ben Friberg Trio 6 p.m. Table 2, 232 East 11th St. (423) 756-8253. www.table2restaurant.com Jimmy Harris 7:30 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202.

(423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com Rock N’ Roll Spectacular 7:30 p.m. Chattanooga Choo Choo Centennial Theatre, 1400 Market St. (423) 266-5000.

Booker Scruggs Ensemble 7:30 p.m. Blue Orleans Creole Restaurant, 3208 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 629-6538. blueorleanscreolerestaurant.com Raul Midón 8 p.m. Nightfall Concert Series, Miller Plaza, 850 Market St. www.nightfallchattanooga.com Camp Normal 9 p.m. Fireside Grill, 3018 Cummings Hwy. (423) 821-9898.

Soul Kracka 9 p.m. Riverhouse Pub, 224 Frazier Ave. (423) 752-0066.

Gabe Newell 9 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919 Camp Normal 9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.com

Paul Smith and the Bourbon St. Band 9 p.m. Bourbon Street Music Bar, 2000 E. 23rd St. (423) 826-1985.

Butch Ross 9 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Paleface, Frontier Ruckus, Ian Thomas 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia Winston & Dave 10 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com Butch Ross 10:30 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com DJ Spicolli Raw Sushi Bar Restaurant & Nightclub, 409 Market Street, (423) 756-1919. www.myspace.com/jimstriker

Saturday Kofi Mawuko, Tommy Cotter, Mike Hale, Elizabeth Miller 10 a.m. Lookout Mtn. Incline Railway, 3917 St. Elmo Ave. (423) 821-4224. www.ridetheincline.com New Binkley Brothers Noon. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd. Lookout Mountain, GA. (706) 820-2531. www.seerockcity.com Halcyon Jazz Trio 6:30 p.m. Blue Orleans Creole Restaurant, 3208 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 629-6538. blueorleanscreolerestaurant.com

Raul Midon Jazz, blues, R&B and folk combine in one distinctive voice.

Free.

8 p.m.

Nightfall, Miller Plaza www.nightfallchattanooga.com MeloManiacs 6 p.m. Bluff View Art District, Terrazine between Tony’s and Back-Inn Café, 411 E. 2nd St. (423) 265-5033.

Shotgun Lover 9 p.m. Discoteca, 304 East Main St. (423) 386-3066.

Jimmy Harris 7:30 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202.

(423) 499-5055.

Rock N’ Roll Spectacular 7:30 p.m. Chattanooga Choo Choo Centennial Theatre, 1400 Market St. (423) 266-5000.

Malcom Holcomb 8 p.m. Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse, 105 McBrien Rd. (423) 892-4960. www.christunity.com Hegarty and DeYoung 8:30 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn) Dangerous New Machine, Leverage 9 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919 Funktastic 5 9 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com Open Mic Night 9 p.m. Mudpie Restaurant, 12 Frazier Ave. (423) 267-9043. www.mudpierestuarant.com

Music Calendar

Send your calendar events to us at calendar@chattanoogapulse.com

Saturday Spotlight

Shotgun Lover with Future Virgins, Knifey Spoony, Goodnight Loving American rock and roll at Discoteca. $5 10 p.m.

Discoteca, 304 Main Street.

(423) 386-3066.

Cutthroat Shamrock, Molly McGuires, Murdergrass Boys 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia Dos Mojo 10 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Dead Confederate 10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.com

Sunday New Binkley Brothers Noon. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd. Lookout Mountain, GA. (706) 820-2531. www.seerockcity.com Joelle Maddyson 12:30 p.m. The Chattanooga Market, Miller Plaza, 850 Market St. (423) 265-3700. www.chattanoogamarket.com Wendy Jans 2 p.m. The Chattanooga Market, 850 Market St. (423) 265-3700.

Open Mic w/Jeff Daniels 4 p.m. Ms. Debbie’s Nightlife Lounge 4762 Highway 58, (423) 485-0966. myspace.com/debbieslounge

Sunday Spotlight

Irish Music Sessions 6:30 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com S.I.N. Night 7 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.com Open Mic 8 p.m. Gene’s Bar & Grill, 724 Ashland Terrace, (423) 870-0880.

Karaoke with DJ Stoll 9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878.

Monday Old Tyme Players 7 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Paul Lohorn and the Monday Nite Big Band 7 p.m. Lindsay Street Hall, 901 Lindsay Street. (423) 755-9111. www. lindsaystreethall.com Apache, The Cosmonauts, Cum Stains, Humms 8 p.m. Discoteca, 304 East Main St. (423) 386-3066.

Jimmy Harris 7:30 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202.

(423) 499-5055.

Karaoke with DJ Stoll 9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878.

Tuesday Ben Friberg Jazz Trio 6:30 p.m. Table 2, 232 East 11th St. (423) 756-8253.

Open Mic with Mike McDade 8 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com Lightning Billy Hopkins 8 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Spoken Word/Poetry Night 8 p.m. The Riverhouse, 224 Frazier Ave., (423) 752-0066.

Jimmy Harris 7:30 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202.

(423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com Spicolli-Oke 9 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919. www.myspace.com/jimstriker Blues Night: Tim Starnes, Husky Burnette, Jacob Newman 9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.com Karaoke with DJ Stoll 9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878.

DJ ScubaSteve Fox and Hound Pub & Grille, 2040 Hamilton Place Blvd #150, (423) 490-1200.

Wednesday Jimmy Harris 7:30 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202.

(423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com Johnny B. and Friends 8 p.m. Bourbon Street Music Bar, 2000 E. 23rd St. (423) 826-1985.

Jennifer Daniels, Wendy Jans, Joelle Maddyson Stellar lineup of great female singers. Plus fresh fruit and veggies!

Free 11 a.m. – 4 p.m.

The Chattanooga Market, First Tennessee Pavilion, 1826 Carter St. (423) 648-2496. www.chattanoogamarket.com Ben Friberg Jazz Trio 7 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Open Mic with Mike McDade 9 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919 Karaoke with American Idol’s Chase Guyton 9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn)

Got a gig coming up that you want to tell the world about?

All you need to do to get the word out for free is to send us your information (the basic when, where and time) and we will list it here in the weekly music calendar.

Email the particulars to us at calendar@chattanoogapulse. com at least ten days before the event.

And for last minute changes and updates, be sure to visit www.chattanoogahasfun.com

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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Life in the Noog

By Chuck Crowder

This Town’s Going To The Dogs I

“Dogs just want to be with you—whether it’s walking the bridges, playing in the park, riding in the car, watching TV on the couch or even shopping.”

Chuck Crowder is a local writer and general man about town. His opinions are just that. Everything expressed is loosely based on fact, and crap he hears people talking about. Take what you just read with a grain of salt, but pepper it in your thoughts. And be sure to check out his popular website thenoog.com

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’ve been keeping up with the recent trial over the mistreatment of animals at a Hamilton Place pet store. It seems that a local “watch dog” group (no pun intended) made unannounced visits to the store and took copious notes as to the cruel and unusual living conditions of the pups for sale.

Turns out that some of the doggies in the window had a disease called Giardia, which is extremely alarming since it’s not only contagious and deadly for dogs, but people can catch it as well. Despite that, nearly all of the dogs were subjected to filthy and cracked cages, extremely high temperatures and toxic air caused by the ammonia gases of urine and feces. It’s enough to make the dog pound seem like a Hilton.

Fortunately, we have many local animal advocates who are continually looking out for the wellbeing of man’s best friend, and one such proponent happened to be working at the pet store in question when she blew the whistle to the McKamey Animal Center staff.

Her tearful recount of the living conditions of the dogs, let alone her own working conditions, set into place a chain of events that eventually led to a court order allowing McKamey to remove the animals from the pet store, treat the sick ones, and hold them all until a judge ruled on whether or not the store was capable of improving conditions and responsible enough to take the animals back.

I’ve always been a dog lover. Although they’ve come and gone throughout my life, I remember each as a warm and loving addition to my family and a definite improvement to

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

my quality of life. However, I know when a dog is living the good life and when it isn’t. If you’re not a homebody, and that dog is alone most of the time, then deep down it’s probably miserable. Dogs are pack animals that need companionship (and preferably a yard). So a couple of times I’ve had to give a dog away in order to improve its quality of life.

The relationship with a pup gets a little selfish when it turns from simple pet into “child I never had so this furry one will do”.

That’s just weird. However it’s a phenomenon that is rampant, especially with ladies 25 to 35 years old who treat the substitution almost like a starter kit to actual child care.

Sometimes they’re just replacing the man who left them—or never came around in the first place—with something that will provide unconditional love (as long as they feed and pet it). But when their collection of strays turns from one or two into four or five, they’ve crossed the threshold from enthusiastic pet owner to “crazy dog person,” and tend to cease from participating in normal human social interaction as a result.

I think the perfect canine scenario would be the traditional “shop dog.” If your dog can accompany you just about everywhere you go—including work—then it’s probably the happiest pup on the planet. The shop dogs I’ve seen around town are quite lucky in many ways. They get tons of attention, and they might just feel like they are contributing to their person’s livelihood in their own special way.

Dogs just want to be with you—whether it’s walking the bridges, playing in the park, riding in the car, watching TV on the couch or even shopping. They’re not welcome in

restaurants and grocery stores for the obvious health code reasons and until recently, they weren’t welcome in some of our city parks either. In fact, just recently they were cleared to once again trot across the Walnut Street Bridge.

That’s due in large part to the fact that some dog owners feel that the organic fertilization qualities of the poop their pup produces is great for the environment. But it isn’t when found on sidewalks and stepped-in by nonpet owners. We’d like to think we’re hip and sophisticated but we’ve proven we don’t know enough to pick up after our pets. In big cities, there’s a hefty fine for refusing to scoop poop.

Maybe there should be here as well.

Speaking of penalties, let’s get back to the perpetrating pet store in the mall. After hearing all of the evidence, Judge Sherry Paty ruled that since the pet shop was part of a chain, then they could take back the healthy animals as long as they were transferred to other locations while the Hamilton Place store was being repaired to humane conditions. The sick pets however, will remain at McKamey to be treated for the time being.

There are two ways to look at this issue.

One would be that we should save these pets from the money-grabbing hands of these uncaring, mass pet retailers by buying them up or removing them. However, there’s more inventory where they came from, and soon the cages will be subjecting a new slew of pups to persecution. I prefer to boycott such establishments so they will go out of business, and stop the madness for good. Probably the best solution of all is to roll over and adopt a rescued mutt from a reputable shelter—but only if you can give it the life it truly deserves.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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Arts & Entertainment

Access to Knowledge knowledge.

By Michael Crumb

“The old adage of ‘not being able to see the forest for the trees’ has particular relevance.”

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W

e are living in the “information age,” and the accumulation of information, as well as the acceleration of that accumulation, continues to overwhelm us. Is it possible now to read all the good books and to see all the good movies? We need to develop precise and inclusive strategies that will obtain for us relevant information. The Hamilton County Bicentennial Library has evolved to provide Chattanoogans with more efficient services and a more comfortable environment for access to

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Library Director David Clapp is overseeing a long overdue reorganization that brings surprising changes to this familiar building. Some rearrangements are already in place. On the first floor, a music and DVD check out has been created, with more accessible displays.

Also, the government document collection has been moved to the third floor to adjoin Tennessee’s history and genealogy collections. These collections are more than a century old, and provide unique sources, including collections of the Cherokee and of the Brainerd Mission.

Probably because our library has been run jointly by the city and county governments, the pace of change has been slow. Also, our library receives less funding than the libraries in other cities in Tennessee. Still, participation in our library system increases, and participants have much to look forward to.

Currently, most of the second floor has been sequestered for work that ought to be completed by the October fundraiser.

(Incidentally, this fundraiser will feature the band Here Come the Mummies.) The excellent children’s section on this floor is still accessible, and this collection ranks in the nation’s top ten percent. The children’s section will also be redone post-October.

The new second floor will feature an Internet café “with benefits” (Clapp’s phrase) and “subject area collections for adults” in which aisles will be stacked with modern bookstore categories with which most people are familiar.

There will be computer touch screens to locate placements, as well as guides to help users.

This new arrangement of computers right next to shelves will be both more convenient and more efficient.

The old adage of “not being able to see the forest for the trees” has particular relevance to the organization of knowledge. One finds what one seeks, a proverbial “tree.” Logical “tree” systems are also involved with computer systems. People familiar with libraries will search for items, “trees” if you will, until they can find a common location. A shelf that holds many items and that can provide an idea of the “forest.” Computer search engines are developing this kind of search capability, and this includes search engines specific to libraries. In coming months, one of these library search engines will be integrated with the library web site.

The Internet Café places computers by shelves, making it possible for users to step over to the shelves. The “forest and trees” adage refers to the relationship of the particular to the general. So between new computer search mechanisms and proximity of shelves, users will be able to find areas that can provide both breadth of subject and balanced perspectives on that subject.

The new second floor arrangements will also provide conference rooms, another important convenience. New automated systems will help to provide new services. Dare we consider library deliveries? It will also become much easier to locate specific items if they don’t happen to be on the shelf.

Chattanoogans ought to applaud David Clapp’s persistence in pursuit of his vision to make our library system a reliable ally in our quest for understanding in this multifaceted world.

A&E Calendar Highlights Friday

Thursday

Back Row Film Series: The Spaghetti West Documentary on spaghetti westerns plus a spaghetti dinner. $15 6 p.m.

Lindsay Street Hall, 901 Lindsay St. www.artsedcouncil.org

Send your calendar events to us at calendar@chattanoogapulse.com

Chattanooga Market Thursday Plaza Party 4 p.m. Miller Plaza, 850 Market St. www.chattanoogamarket.com Wine Tasting Series 2010: “Pairing Wine with Food” 6 p.m. Back Inn Café, 412 East 2nd St. (423) 265-5033. www.bluffviewartdistrict.com Capitalism: A Love Story 6 p.m. green|spaces, 63 E. Main St. (423) 648-0963.

The Crucible 7 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com Avatar in 3D 7 p.m. IMAX Theater at the Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. www.tnaqua.org/imax Chattanooga Lookouts vs.

Huntsville Stars 7:15 p.m. AT&T Field, 201 Power Alley. (423) 267-2208. www.lookouts.com Killer Beaz 8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com

Chattanooga Ghost Tour Learn the haunted hangouts of the Scenic City. $13 8:15 p.m.

Meet at downtown end of the Walnut Street Bridge (423) 821-7125. www.chattanoogaghosttrours.com

Saturday

“Keeping It Alive” reception Street art installation by graffiti artist Sourone.

Free 6 – 9 p.m. reception Asher Love Studio + Gallery, 3914 St. Elmo Ave., Ste. G (423) 822-0289. asherlovegallery.blogspot.com

Hubble in 3D 11 a.m., 1, 3, 5, 7 p.m. IMAX Theater at the Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695.

Chattanooga Lookouts vs.

Huntsville Stars 7:15 p.m. AT&T Field, 201 Power Alley. (423) 267-2208. www.lookouts.com Killer Beaz 7:30, 10 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com The Crucible 8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com Avatar in 3D 8 p.m. IMAX Theater at the Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695.

Brigadoon 8 p.m. Signal Mountain Playhouse, corner of Rolling Way and James Blvd. Signal Mountain, TN. (423) 886-5243. www.smph.org Mystery of Flight 138 8:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839.

Female Impersonation Show Midnight. Images, 6065 Lee Hwy. (423) 855-8210. www.imagesbar.com “Growing up Jewish” Jewish Cultural Center, 5461 N. Terrace Rd. (423) 493-0270.

Chattanooga Professional Photography Group Exhibit North River Civic Center, 1009 Executive Dr. Ste. 102.

(423) 870-8924.

“Fresh Coastal Scenes” Shuptrine Fine Art Group, 2646 Broad St. (423) 266-4453. www.shuptrinefineartgroup.com Smith-Cleary Photography and Printmaking Exum Gallery, 305 W. 7th St. (423) 593-4265.

“The Myth of Mary Gregory” Houston Museum of Decorative Arts, 201 High St. (423) 267-7176.

Terri Zitrick Denny Art My Color Image Boutique and Gallery, 330 Frazier Ave. (423) 598-6202.

“Sensation” River Gallery, 400 E. 2nd St. (423) 265-5033.

Sunday Chattanooga River Market 10 a.m. Tennessee Aquarium Plaza, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. www.tnaqua.org SHE Expo 11 a.m. Chattanooga Convention Center, 1150 Carter St. (423) 756-0001 www.timesfreepress.com Hubble in 3D 11 a.m., 1, 3, 5, 7 p.m. IMAX Theater at the Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695.

Mosaic Market 11 a.m. 412 Market St. (corner of 4th/Market). (423) 624-3915 Brainerd Farmer’s Market 11 a.m. – 1 p.m. Grace Episcopal Church, 20 Belvoir Ave. Art Til Dark Noon. Northshore, (423) 413-8999. www.arttildark.wordpress.com Culture Shock 2010 5 p.m. First Tennessee Pavilion, 1826 Carter St. www.myspace.com/therealtran Chattanooga Lookouts vs.

Huntsville Stars 7:15 p.m. AT&T Field, 201 Power Alley. (423) 267-2208.

Killer Beaz 7:30, 10 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com The Crucible 8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com Brigadoon 8 p.m. Signal Mountain Playhouse, corner of Rolling Way and James Blvd. Signal Mountain, TN. (423) 886-5243. www.smph.org Avatar in 3D 8 p.m. IMAX Theater at the Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695.

Movies In The Park 9 p.m. Coolidge Park, 150 River St. (423) 265-0771. www.firstthings.org Female Impersonation Show Midnight. Images, 6065 Lee Hwy. (423) 855-8210. www.imagesbar.com “Southern Journeys” Chattanooga African American Museum, 200 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 266-8658.

The Crucible Last chance to catch the Arthur Miller classic. $10 - $20 2:30 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre, Main Stage, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com

Chattanooga Market 11 a.m. First Tennessee Pavilion, 1826 Carter St. (423) 266-4041. www.chattanoogamarket.com SHE Expo Noon. Chattanooga Convention Center, 1150 Carter St. (423) 756-0001. www.timesfreepress.com Book signing of On This Day in McCallie’s History with John McCall 2 p.m. Old Towne Bookstore, 3213 Brainerd Rd. (423) 648-0963.

All You Can Eat Comedy Buffet 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 East M L King Blvd. 423-266-1400. www.jjsbohemia.com Cherokee Stone Carvings Bill Shores Frame and Gallery, 307 Manufacturers Rd. (423) 756-6746. www.billshoresframes.com Stephen Rolfe Powell Glass Exhibition Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944.

“Keeping It Alive” Asher Love Studio and Gallery, 3914 St. Elmo Avenue, Suite G. (423) 822-0289

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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A&E Calendar Highlights Monday Literary Speed Dating 6:30 p.m. Chattanooga-Hamilton County Bicentennial Library, 1001 Broad St. lib.chattanooga.gov Avatar in 3D 7 p.m. IMAX Theater at the Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. www.tnaqua.org/imax Speak Easy: Spoken Word and Poetry 8 p.m. Mudpie Restaurant, 12 Frazier Ave. (423) 267-9040. www.mudpierestaurant.com Live Cabaret Show with James Breedwell 9, 11 p.m. Bourbon St. Music Bar, 2000 E. 23rd St. (423) 697-9957 “Transformation 6: Contemporary Works in Glass” Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944. www.huntermuseum.org “Skins and Skeletons” AVA Gallery, 30 Frazier Ave. (423) 265-1282. www.avarts.org

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Tuesday Chattanooga Writers Guild Meeting 7 p.m. Chattanooga-Hamilton County Bicentennial Library, 1001 Broad St. lib.chattanooga.gov Photographic Society of Chattanooga Meeting 6:30 p.m. Blackwell Gallery, 1815 McCallie Ave. (423) 591-2916. www.chattanoogaphoto.org Avatar in 3D 7 p.m. IMAX Theater at the Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. www.tnaqua.org/imax Live Cabaret Show with James Breedwell 9, 11 p.m. Bourbon St. Music Bar, 2000 E. 23rd St. (423) 697-9957 “Jellies: Living Art” Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944.

Lorrraine Christie Art Gallery 1401, 1401 Williams St. (423) 265-0015. www.gallety1401.com

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Wednesday Main Street Farmers Market 4 – 6 p.m. 197 W. Main St. www.mainstfarmersmarket.com Avatar in 3D 7 p.m. IMAX Theater at the Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695.

Whitney Nave Jones Art Mosaic Gallery, 412 Market St. (423) 320-6738. www.mosaicchattanooga.com “Raining Cats and Dogs” & “Chasing the Light” In-Town Gallery, 26A Frazier Ave. (423) 267-9214. www.intowngallery.com “Fresh Coastal Scenes” Shuptrine Fine Art Group, 2646 Broad St. (423) 266-4453. www.shuptrinefineartgroup.com “The Myth of Mary Gregory” Houston Museum of Decorative Arts, 201 High St. (423) 267-7176. www.thehoustonmuseum.com Terri Zitrick Denny Art My Color Image Boutique and Gallery, 330 Frazier Ave. (423) 598-6202.

Editor’s Pick: Featured Event Of The Week

Historical Bike Tour to Moccasin Bend National Archeological District Ninety-minute bike ride for riders ages 8 and up. Rangers will provide interpretation; loaner bikes available. Pre-registration required.

6 p.m.

Thursday, July 8 Free Begins at Outdoor Chattanooga in Coolidge Park (423) 643-6888. www.outdoorchattanooga.com

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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On The Beat

By Alex Teach

How Many Shots?

I

“The officers involved need to focus on healing their psychological wounds…but the Media Elite needs to be ashamed for not bothering to ask real questions.”

When Officer Alexander D. Teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he is an occasional student, carpenter, boating enthusiast, and spends his spare time volunteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center. To contact him directtly, follow him on Facebook at www.facebook.com/alex.teach

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woke up on a Tuesday morning to hear the lovely Mrs. Sarah Jennings on WTVC Channel 9 informing her viewers that police had been involved in a fatal shooting in the hours before this broadcast, and that they still were not certain how many shots had been fired. That was it. That was when the whole day went to shit for me…right at its beginning.

I never heard the condition of the offender specified, but I gleaned from the “fatal” aspect of the stories introduction that it was bad, and not getting better anytime soon. I also never heard the condition of the officers involved.

The only thing mentioned by our Media Elite from print to broadcast was that there was no word yet on “how many shots were fired.” Are you serious?

I will never understand this; at the same time, you may be on the other side of the fence and not understand my annoyance, so I’ll give you some examples for perspective: Four days prior to the shooting Mrs. Sarah spoke of, two Florida sheriff ’s deputies were shot during a traffic stop in Lakeland, Florida, the suspect being killed by return fire. One cop was shot in the stomach and left arm, the other in his hands.

On a more local level, police were involved in a shooting in the East Lake Courts in July of 2009 in which a 15-year-old “child” was shot after he fired several rounds into a passing car on 4th Avenue.

Do you know what was never asked in either incident (or any other I can locate or recall)?

How many times the suspect shot at those

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

cops, or how many times that “child” shot into that car with a neighborhood as a backstop for his bullets prompting his own ill-fated legal intervention. Do you know why that wasn’t asked? Because it is as stupid a question as it is irrelevant.

Yet when a guy points a rifle at six cops (7th Avenue, June of 2009) and they all defend themselves with an average of 10 shots each (59 fired with 43 hits), they are…what, evil?

Wrong?

A cop killer was found in Polk County, Florida after 21 hours on the run (during any of which he could have surrendered peacefully, incidentally) from shooting one cop in the head and killing another (and his police dog), and 10 deputies fired a total of 110 rounds at him, striking him 68 times (for an average of 11 rounds each) and they, too, are apparently in league with the devil. (No word, by the way, as to how many shots the late Angilo Freeland fired into the dead deputy and his dog, though eight wounds were discovered in the human officer’s body).

Why did each cop fire an average of 10 rounds? Because they didn’t get a “time out” to see who would fire. Ten cops trained the same way perceived the same threat at the same time and responded identically. It’s not rocket surgery, folks.

So anyway…you want a definitive answer to what I believe is a fairly stupid question? “As many as it takes.”

Cops are trained to shoot until the threat is stopped. Period. Why the perceived gray area? Because as it turns out, each shooting is “different.” No cookie-cutter experiences in my times at these scenes, anyway.

You see, we are trained to protect life and property, and to go home at the end of the shift. Contrary to popular belief “dying” is not

a part of our job requirements; it is merely an unfortunate outcome. And when someone who has already demonstrated a propensity to kill people (cops or not) is confronted and refuses to drop a gun, they do not get to “shoot first” out of some stupid sense of fairness inexperienced people apparently feel should exist. (And don’t start with the “Just shoot the gun out of his hand” crap, either. Any of you been in a car wreck? OK. If you saw it coming JUST before it happened, shoot the passengerside mirror off the car with a pistol just before impact. Sound easy now? Same thing.)

We can solve that problem so that you are “happier” with how we defend our lives by just giving us three bullets per cop, nationwide.

That’s all you think it should take, right? So if we screw those up, it’s just our ass and that justifies our being killed or wounded. After all…you watch TV. You think that each bullet, wherever it strikes, hits the “off ” button in people. I must be lying to say that when I’ve seen it in real life I’ve watched people merely look down at the slit (or hole) and proceed onward, two good minutes of usefulness until the oxygen in their brain and muscles runs low. Reporters are on TV, though and can’t lie, right?

How Many Shots Were Fired? “All of them,” or “As many as it took.” Either answer will do, but know that it is only being asked so they won’t have to ask the real question of “What led that man (or woman) to the point of having to be shot?”

The officers involved need to focus on healing their psychological wounds…but the Media Elite needs to be ashamed for not bothering to ask real questions. Because as the perpetrators know, cops are just easier targets for them.

Disgusting.

The Pulse • Dining Out Spotlight

Create Your FroYo Fantasy at Sweet CeCe’s

by Colleen Wade I scream, you scream, we all scream for…frozen yogurt? Sure! Why not?

Frozen yogurt is mostly fat free, and beyond that contains probiotic cultures which promote better digestion. So— why wouldn’t we all scream for frozen yogurt?

Well, for a while it wasn’t readily available to us. It was during the 1970s that frozen yogurt was introduced. H.P. Hood presented “Frogurt.” Then in 1978, a Bostonbased ice cream, candy and sandwich chain, Brigham’s, developed and introduced the first packaged frozen yogurt under the name “Humphreez Yogart.” Originally intended as a healthier alternative to ice cream, frozen yogurt initially met with criticism due to its slightly more tart taste. After manufacturers worked to find a sweeter-tasting recipe, which they did, frozen yogurt took off.

By the early 1990s, frozen yogurt sales comprised roughly 10 percent of the dessert market. Shops opened everywhere and “FroYo” became something of a household name.

Enter CeCe Moore. While most people are content to eat sweet treats, CeCe’s passion has always been creating them. She learned this from her family—grandparents, great aunts and great uncles in North Carolina— who at every family gathering dished up homemade ice cream with fresh fruit mixed in. As CeCe began to concoct her own creations, she opted for a healthier alternative, pairing frozen yogurt with sweet toppings for a taste few can resist.

CeCe believes this must be the sweetest job ever! CeCe and her husband, Brian, recently moved to Nashville from California with their four children and launched a new business: Sweet CeCe’s Frozen Yogurt. Sweet CeCe’s opened in Belle Meade Hill Center in Nashville and in downtown Franklin.

Along comes Stella Anderson—a Chattanoogan whose background is law.

Stella stumbled across a Sweet CeCe’s Frozen Yogurt and fell in love. Says Stella, “I

excited. I decided to take my friend’s 10-year-old daughter along. Who better to judge tasty treats than a 10 year old, right? Haley and I arrived at Sweet CeCe’s and set about getting our frozen yogurt. Stella says, “At Sweet CeCe’s Frozen Yogurt & Treats, we believe creating your own frozen yogurt dessert should be a fun experience, with the end result being your favorite creation.”

That’s exactly what we did—made our favorite creations! I went a little on the conservative side with Georgia Peach frozen yogurt and added walnuts and Nerds. Haley was a typical 10 year old: Country Vanilla frozen yogurt with bubblegum, Nerds, Skittles and sprinkles.

I’d have to say the outing was a success.

As we walked out of Sweet CeCe’s, Haley looked up and asked, “Can I have my birthday party here next year?”

Sweet CeCe’s changes their flavors every seven to ten days. Always on tap, though, are Country Vanilla, Chocolate and European Tart. You’ll find flavors like Banana, Irish Mint, and Pistachio rotating through Sweet CeCe’s. In fact, an already frequent customer to Sweet CeCe’s, Justin Allen, says pistachio is his favorite—it’s the buttery smoothness that appeals to him. Allen says he and his wife are immensely pleased with the opening of Sweet CeCe’s on Frazier. “My wife and I are both from much larger cities, and sometimes we lament the limited availability of things we’re used visited my sister in Nashville last December to. The addition of something as simple and she took me to Sweet CeCe’s Frozen as a soft-serve shop makes the city more Yogurt and Treats in Belle Meade. The shop appealing to us, and, I think, creates an was decorated in festive colors that created element that is inviting and adds character to a wonderful atmosphere. The yogurt came our community.” in a variety of flavors and was absolutely “At Sweet CeCe’s, you swirl your own yogurt delicious. The topping choices were fabulous. and add your own toppings,” says Stella, “and I fell in love with Sweet CeCe’s and contacted each time you come in, your creation can be a the owners about bringing the experience to new taste sensation!”

Chattanooga.” Sweet CeCe’s Frozen Yogurt Sweet CeCe’s, 330 Frazier Avenue across opened two weeks ago on Frazier Avenue. from Coolidge Park. Open Monday through Now, I have to interject a bit of personal into Thursday, 11 a.m. to 10 p.m., Friday and the story here. I get some great assignments Saturday, 11 a.m. to 11 p.m., and Sunday, through The Pulse. I thoroughly enjoy it. But Noon to 9 p.m. Call (423) 710-1633 or visit it’s assignments like this that really get me www.sweetceces.com online. www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse 25

Film Feature

The Old West Through Italian Eyes Series, Eastwood is indeed front and snarling center.

By Janis Hashe

“One spokesman estimates that for several years, 40 percent of Italian movies were westerns.”

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Even non-fans of the

“spaghetti western”—the genre that emerged in the ’60s creating a European fantasy of the American West—recognize how iconic some of its images are. Seemingly, most of these films starred Clint Eastwood—and in The Spagehtti West, airing Thursday night as part of the AEC Back Row Film

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

This 2005 doc “explores the genre’s rise and continued popularity over three decades with rare footage from dozens of classic Italian westerns, original trailers, and insightful interviews with cast and crew, including Clint Eastwood, Ennio Morricone, Ferdinando Baldi, Sergio Corbucci and Damiano Damiani,” according to docurama.com.

Glenn Erickson, on DVD Savant Review, notes: “The Spaghetti western genre is discussed at length by many of the personalities who created it. The Italian film industry in the late ’50s and early ’60s was enjoying international success with genre-based movies, and began experimenting with home-made westerns after several German-made efforts became popular. Sergio Leone had a breakout hit with 1964’s Fistful of Dollars, giving the Italian industry a major boost. One spokesman estimates that for several years, 40 percent of Italian movies were westerns…

“Clint Eastwood describes why he was enticed to Italy to star in a movie, and Leone’s screenwriter Sergio Donati explains that the outrageous copycat mentality resulting in 1,001 imitations of The Man With No Name was understandable, considering that the first film had been plagiarized from Akira Kurosawa’s Yojimbo…

“The docu then gets into the political Spaghettis, which paralleled the student and worker upheavals that swept Europe (and most everywhere else) in 1968; the mercenary nature of the typical Spaghetti anti-hero fit well into stories about class-warfare revolutions. Not much later, the genre morphed into comedies and self-parodies typified by the team of Bud Spencer and Terence Hill, who came off as a Spaghetti Laurel and Hardy combo.

“A hefty list of notables is interviewed.

For most viewers, the faces and names will be obscure, but even confirmed Spaghetti fans will enjoy remarks by directors they’ve seen rarely, if at all: Ferdinando Baldi, Enzo G. Castellari, Sergio Corbucci, Damiano Damiani, Sergio Martino, Giulio Questi, Sergio Sollima. Most are subtitled in Italian; they all seem to love to talk.”

Perfetto! And as part of this evening, you will enjoy a spaghetti dinner as well, thus incorporating another favorite Italian pastime— eating. Assolutamente perfetto!

The Spaghetti West Part of the AEC Back Row Film Series Directed by David Gregory With Clint Eastwood, Ennio Morricone, Ferdinando Baldi, Sergio Corbucci and Damiano Damiani $15 (reservations needed) 6 p.m., Thursday July 8 Lindsay Street Hall, 901 Lindsay St. www.artsedcouncil.org

New In Theaters

By Gary Poole

Despicable Me

The Kids Are Alright Two teenaged children (Alice in Wonderland’s Mia Wasikowska and Journey to the Center of the Earth’s Josh Hutcherson) get the notion to seek out their biological father and introduce him into the family life that their two mothers (Bening and Moore) have built for them.

Once the donor (Ruffalo) is found, the household will never be the same, as family ties are defined, re-defined, and re-redefined.

Starring Julianne Moore, Annette Bening Directed by Lisa Cholodenko

Predators A group of hardened killers are hunted on an alien planet. Mercenaries, murderers, gangsters, and convicts, they were the most feared men on Earth. But now they’re a long way from home, and when the predators become the prey, they prepare for the fight of their lives. Not a remake in any traditional sense of the word, but a revisitation to the world first seen through the eyes of Arnold Schwarzenegger in the original.

Starring Adrien Brody, Topher Grace Directed by Nimrod Antal

The Girl Who Played With Fire Mikael Blomkvist is about to run a story that will expose an extensive sex-trafficking operation between Eastern Europe

and Sweden, implicating well-known and highly placed members of Swedish society. On the eve of publication, the two investigating reporters are murdered and the fingerprints found on the murder weapon belong to Lisbeth Salande.

Starring Noomi Rapace, Michael Nyqvist, Lena Endre, Sofia Ledarp Directed by Daniel Alfredson

Cyrus With John’s social life at a standstill and his ex-wife about to get remarried, a downon-his-luck divorcée finally meets the woman of his dreams, only to discover she has another man in her life —her son.

Before long, the two are locked in a battle of wits for the woman they both love, and it appears only one man can be left standing when it’s over.

Starring John C. Reilly, Marisa Tomei, Jonah Hill Directed by Jay & Mark Duplass

Great Directors Original, in-depth conversations with nine of the world’s greatest living directors: Bernardo Bertolucci, David Lynch, Liliana Cavani, Stephen Frears, Agnes Varda, Ken Loach, Todd Haynes, Catherine Breillat, Richard Linklater and John Sayles. A fascinating look inside the myriad ways that films are being made these days.

Directed by Angela Ismallos

Solution To Last Week’s Crossword

In a happy suburban neighborhood surrounded by white picket fences with flowering rose bushes, sits a black house with a dead lawn. Unbeknownst to the neighbors, hidden deep beneath this home is a vast secret hideout.

Surrounded by an army of tireless, little yellow minions, we discover Gru (voiced by Steve Carell) planning the biggest heist in the history of the world: he is going to steal the moon. Armed with his arsenal of shrink rays, freeze rays and battle-ready vehicles for land and air, he vanquishes all who stand in his way. Until the day he encounters the something he has never had to overcome before: children.

Starring Steve Carell, Jason Segel Directed by Chris Renaud & Peter Coffin

Crossword solutions every week at www.chattanoogapulse.com www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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Spirits Within

By Joshua Hurley

No “Folie” to Sample These Napa Wines

JONESIN’

“Vow Your Head” –and keep on going

Editor’s note: This week, we reprint a favorite “Spirits Within.”

Faithful readers know—but if you’re just now joining us—each week, Riley’s Wine and spirits on Hixson Pike chooses a favorite from among our large selection of wine and spirits and shares them with our Pulse readers.

Folie a Deux Winery (FOHlee ah doo, which is French for “shared lunacy” or “shared fantasy”), is located in the Napa Valley, just northeast of St. Helena, California. It was founded

by Larry and Evie Dismang in 1981. The winery gained praise for its chardonnay wines, growing from 2,000 cases a year to 20,000 in three years. Today, chardonnay comprises half the winery’s production, cabernet sauvignon about a quarter, with the rest being chenin blanc, moscato, merlot, syrah, and some gewürztraminer.

Folie’s “Ménage a Trois” varietals have become some of the most popular wines at Riley’s and are available in four different blends: chardonnay, white, red and rose.

Ménage a Trois 2007 Chardonnay is something different from the usual ho-hum lines and rows of boring chardonnay, in that it’s a blend of three different types of chardonnay grapes.

Fifty-six percent of the grapes come from Monterey County, 37 percent from Santa Barbara and 7 percent from Mendocino County. French yeast fermentation enhances the fruit flavors, with aging in French and American oak delivering a creamy finish. Each of the three geographically different chardonnay grapes produce distinctive qualities: Fresh citrus aromas come from Monterey, lush tropical fruit flavors from Santa Barbara, and all-around great structure from Mendocino.

Folie’s Ménage a Trois 2008 Rose is an incredible blend of merlot, syrah and

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gewürztraminer. If you’re a fan of roses, such as white zinfandel or merlot, you’ll love this one. And if you’re not, then you will appreciate the skill with which it was crafted. The merlot and syrah grapeskins (peels) are cold soaked to give the wine its seductive pink color. Gewürztraminer adds some exotic spice missing from plain rose, while the syrah rounds the spectrum with full ripe fruit. This rose explodes with strawberry, raspberry and flowers, and has a smooth finish that’s not dry.

Folie’s Ménage a Trois White 2008 marries muscat, chardonnay and chenin blanc. Each varietal has been individually harvested, crushed and fermented cold into steel casks to preserve the fruity aromas of each grape. The chardonnay is rich and firm, the muscat is wild and exotic and the chenin blanc is soft and supportive—together they make another perfect trio. This wine is fruity, easy to drink, works well alone, with or without food.

The Folie Ménage a Trois Red blends zinfandel, merlot and cabernet sauvignon together after separate fermentation has added even more character to these already distinctive red grapes. First you’ll taste the zin, with its rich blackberry and raspberry flower. Next comes merlot, with its red fruit and one-of-a kind smooth mouth feel, and last but not least, comes cabernet sauvignon with plum, plums and the expectant, gigantic tannic finish. Cheers!

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Across 1 Fictional dieter Jack 6 May honoree 9 Hutt in the “Star Wars” series 14 Refrain heard with animal noises 15 Lawyers’ gp.

16 Company that makes “Dial Up” mascara 17 Don’t buy it, in a way 18 Peppermint Patty, to Marcie 19 Hangman’s knot 20 “___ all come out in the wash” 21 Freezes the twos out of a deck of cards?

23 “OK, now I’m ready to play!”

25 ___ Aquarium (Chicago attraction) 26 Obligation 28 “Te ___” 29 Only Norwegian band to do a James Bond theme song 32 “National” mag for celeb breakups 36 “The ___ Sanction” 38 Rakish fellow 39 Home to the National Bunraku Theatre 42 Movie vampire, for short 43 They need wind 45 Brad Garrett sitcom that

ended in June 2010 47 Gossip site 48 Toward the stern 51 Generation ___ 52 “Gawwwd, how boring” 54 Pearl Jam leader Eddie 58 Picture scribbled while talking on the phone?

62 It’s fought by willpower 63 “You Got It (The Right Stuff)” boy band 64 By way of 65 Old saying 66 Uttar Pradesh’s country 67 “Plus a bunch of other stuff” 68 Bricks for kids 69 Breaking even 70 That anonymous lady over there 71 Together Down 1 Baseball commissioner Bud 2 Michelangelo marvel 3 Empire 4 Fencing showdown in a grocery store?

5 Corn site 6 Like some nouns, in Ger. 7 “Village Voice” awards 8 Warfield of “Night Court” 9 That anonymous lady over there 10 Fun way to read 11 Frat leader, maybe 12 Two, for binary

13 Enthusiastic votes 21 Opening bars 22 Rep.’s counterpart 24 Cannes-sent?

27 “90125” band 29 Taj Mahal’s locale 30 Firearms, slangily 31 Make like an angry cat 32 Prefix for “while” 33 Linguist Chomsky 34 It may be unwelcome when popped 35 Chinese New Year animal for most of 2008 37 Guys who only celebrate mid-month?

40 “Kid-tested” cereal brand 41 Tylenol rival 44 Temporary flood stopper 46 Dr. of “The Chronic” 49 “To Wong ___ Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar” 50 Piles of booty 52 Take effect 53 Singer Piaf 55 “Rocky IV” rival Ivan 56 Goad 57 Witherspoon of “Four Christmases” 58 Letter in the middle: abbr.

59 Letters on fashion labels 60 City south of Sacramento 61 It may be untied 65 Words before carte or mode

Crossword created By Matt Jones. © 2010 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #0475.

Free Will Astrology CANCER (June 21-July 22): Have you ever observed the rising moon with such a steady gaze that you’ve actually seen it move? Have you ever sat yourself down in front of a rose bud during the hour it exploded into full bloom? Those experiences have resemblances to a slow-motion burst of graceful growth that’s unfolding in your own sphere. I hope you have the patience to give it your full attention, because that way it’s more likely to express its potential completely. To enhance your chances of nurturing the subtle magic, remember and ruminate on the images your nightly dreams give you.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): I’m not necessarily saying that you have superhuman levels of courage these days, Leo, but you do have more than usual.

What’s even more important for the task at hand is the fact that you have an exceptional capacity for identifying the fantasies that frighten you and finding fresh and practical ways to deal with them.

That’s why I say that you now have an excellent opportunity to achieve a major victory over your fears…to outwit them, outflank them, and even dissolve them. To get started on this glorious quest, chant the following ten times: “I am a crafty, compassionate warrior who finds amusement in every challenge.”

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): One of my Virgo readers, Mariann Grace, is conducting a research project. It’s rooted in two assumptions. The first is an idea of mine: that everyone alive has an inalienable right to a steady supply of fresh omens.

The second assumption comes from the writer Angus Stocking: “Always interpret every omen favorably.” With these two ideas as her theses, Mariann is testing the following approach: “Interpret absolutely everything that happens as a favorable omen.” This would be an excellent game for you to play in the coming week, Virgo. Synchronicities are about to rain down upon you, flood toward you, and bubble up from below. Judging from the astrological configurations, I’d say it really does make sense to regard every one of them as meaningful, useful, and invigorating.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): It’s high time to banish the excuses you think you have for not doing your best. There is no longer any valid reason to hide from your true calling or deny yourself more profound happiness. You are ready to see that the supposed “obstacles” to your success are actually instrumental to your success—prods that will make you so much smarter and stronger that you cannot be defeated by circumstances. Why is this happening now? It’s because a force working behind the scenes—you can imagine it as God or destiny or karma if you like -- is clearing away the illusions that have held you in thrall to false ideas about who you are. If I were you, I’d shout “hallelujah!” as I pinch myself in the butt and pat myself on the head.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): For the foreseeable future, it’s fine with God (and with Nature, too) if you put all your eggs in one basket—as long as the basket is well-woven and beautiful to behold.

You’ve also got cosmic permission to forget about all but one of the tempting targets in your field of vision—as long as the bull’s-eye you choose is very worthy of your sacred longing. To sum up, Scorpio, be single-mindedly focused almost to the point of manic obsession— as long as you’re reasonably sure that the object of your devotion is your personal version of the Holy Grail.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): In the next few weeks, the odds are higher than usual that you’ll inherit an amusement park or a tropical island or a profitable pig farm. There’s also a slight chance that you will win a Dutch lottery, find a diamond ring on the sidewalk, or be picked to star in a new reality TV show, How Would You Use a Gift of Ten Million Dollars? But what’s far more likely than any of those possibilities is that you will be able to capitalize on a legacy whose cash value is hard to estimate. Is there any birthright you’ve been

By Rob Brezsny Truthrooster@gmail.com neglecting to exploit? Any part of your heritage that may be ready to bring you a boost?

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): So it turns out that the “blemish” is actually essential to the beauty.

The “deviation” is at the core of the strength. The “wrong turn” was crucial to you getting you back on the path with heart. I have rarely seen a better example of happy accidents, Capricorn. You may not realize it quite yet—although I hope this horoscope is bringing it all into focus—but you have been the beneficiary of a tricky form of divine intervention. One good way of expressing your gratitude is to share with friends the tale of how you came to see that the imperfections were perfect.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Your anger is potentially a valuable resource. At least in theory, it can be a motivating force that gives you the clarity and stamina you need to make constructive changes. But how can you make sure that your anger serves your generous urges? What should you do to keep it from being just a self-indulgent thrash that leads to no productive action? Here’s one thing you can do: Express your rage very selectively; don’t let it leak all over everything.

Here’s another thing: Cultivate loads of empathy, joy, and appreciation for beauty. Then when you do unleash your rage, it will be conditioned by love.

Now would be an excellent time to try out these ideas.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Have you fallen in omnidirectional love these past few weeks? Are you swooning with such reckless splendor that at times you feel like you’re swimming in mid-air? By my reckoning, you have an urgent need to be caught up in a vortex of free-form affection. Your receptivity to being tickled and spun around by an almost insane outpouring of libidinous empathy is crucial to your education. If for some reason this has not been the case, please find out what you’ve been doing to obstruct the boisterously tender feelings the cosmos is aching to fill you up with.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): Have you added some bulk and stability to your foundation any time recently, Aries? Have you grown your roots deeper and asked for more from your traditional sources and recommitted yourself to your primal vows? I hope so, because this is a perfect time, astrologically speaking, to strengthen your link to everything that sustains you. You have a sacred duty to push harder for access to the stuff that builds your emotional intelligence and fuels your long-range plans.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): I like the way you’ve been contradicting yourself, Taurus. I appreciate your ability to be inconsistent, paradoxical, and upside-down. It has allowed you to wriggle free of the rut you had been stuck in. You’ve stirred the affections of people who had been frustrated about your narrow focus. Yes, it’s true that you have also sown a bit of confusion in a situation that had formerly been clear and concise, and that may have rankled the sticklers. But in my opinion, this is a fertile, healthy confusion that will ultimately lead to an unexpected breakthrough.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “We’re all in ‘sales,’ selling our personalities, our accomplishments, our charms.” That’s a quote from Richard Grossinger’s new book 2013. I share his view of human nature. Is there any interaction between people that doesn’t involve a bit of hustling? The subtext of every encounter includes at least one of the following: 1. “I want you to like me.” 2. “I’m trying to get you to believe I am who I say I am.”

3. “I’d really like you to see how interesting and important and unique I am.” Given the fact that this is a ubiquitous phenomenon, there’s no need to be shy or embarrassed or secretive about it. That’s especially true for you these days. So get out there and sell yourself, Gemini. With brazen innocence and relaxed enjoyment, show the world who you are and why you matter.

Joy Stick

By Chris Gillespie

Red Hats, Mushrooms and Turtles in Space Every hundred years, there is a shiny star shower on the Mushroom Kingdom. Mario thought it was romantic when he brought Princess Peach to see it—but that’s when Bowser, one of Mario’s greatest foes, decided to crash the show by bringing Giga Bowser. He snags Peach before flying out into space, leaving Mario with his usual task of rescuing her.

With the addition of new powerups and the help of old friends, our favorite Bowser-bashing-brother is back in Super Mario Galaxy 2 to try to defeat this monster once and for all.

Who else could travel the universe, visiting bizarre planets in a spaceship resembling his own face? Such a feat wouldn’t be possible without the assistance of his Luma friends and an abundance of star bits scattered across the galaxy that help you discover new planets, daze lesser enemies, and feed the always-hungry Luma. Special Luma actually transform to helpful items for enough star bits. Some are more greedy than others, but they will give extra health or 1-ups.

The worlds that you explore are like no other—some having vanishing floors that follow certain beats and saws that cut away the board as you progress; some even cover with lava and have snow. Every planet has a power star you need to retrieve to complete it, in order to power your ship and unlock new worlds, but as you advance in the game, the more difficult this becomes.

With new worlds come new power-ups.

As we are all familiar with the Fire Flower and Bee Mushroom from previous games, the new abilities are something else. When you’re high above the clouds, falling is the last thing you want to do, so the Cloud Flower will work wonders, creating a cloud right under your feet. The coolest part is that with just a flick of the wrist, up to three fluffy clouds save you from death, or help you reach higher places. We’ve all heard “a rolling stone gathers no moss”—that’s proved with the Rock Mushroom powerup, which lets you have a boulder to crush

everything in your path.

One power-up, Boo Mushroom, allows you to turn into a boo ghost. Being able to pass though walls was helpful, but floating around with the help of fans was slow paced, in my opinion. However, you can get power-ups for Yoshi to help you get through tough situations. That’s right: Yoshi, the lovable green dino is back to help Mario. Who wouldn’t want a dinosaur that can eat anything and pop out star bits?

Yoshi also has special foods that give him crazy powers. The Dash Pepper rockets him forward, while the Blimp Fruit fills him with enough hot air to reach those hard-toget-to spaces.

Whenever you think about Mario, Luigi isn’t far behind. Certain planets allow you to tag out and play as the younger brother as you’re spinning star to star, but you can’t play as Luigi in multiplayer mode. Instead, you play as a Luma following Mario around, helping him collect star bits and daze enemies. But in the end, after beating Bowser and his minions, you call it a day in the Mushroom Kingdom.

This was a very fun—yet extremely frustrating—game to play. Once you got used to the controls and how the world worked, it got better. If you can’t beat a part, give it another shot. There were times when I thought some challenges were impossible, especially after losing nearly all my lives. If you enjoyed the first game, you’ll love Super Mario Galaxy 2. It almost made me want to buy a Wii…almost.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 8, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | The Pulse

29

Ask A Mexican!

By Gustavo Arellano

Special Bowdlerization Edition

“I believe the last senator who questioned that law was a cartoon senator on the The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show. Am I correct?”

Ask the Mexican at themexican@ askamexican.net, be his fan on Facebook, follow him on Twitter or ask him a video question at youtube.com/askamexicano!

30

Dear Mexican, I’m a (poor) white girl myself, but I have to ask: What’s the deal with all the rich white girls playing such a big role in Fiesta?

Why is it always rich white girls that get crowned? Don’t you think the majority of them should be Mexican girls since it’s Fiesta? Why has this gone on so long? Time for a change in the royalty!

— Poor Confused White Girl Dear Gabacha, A bit of context for the readers is needed before I proceed. Cabrones: Poor Confused White Girl refers to Fiesta San Antonio, an annual springtime celebration in the River City dating back to the late 1800s that, like the city, has undergone many transformations over the decades.

It’s quite the spectacle but originally served the specific political purpose of romanticizing the city’s contentious past with its Mexicans, from that whole Alamo desmadre to the simultaneous romanticizing and demonizing of the “chile queens,” the original Mexican street food hawkers immortalized by writers as diverse as Stephen Ambrose and O. Henry. The best treatment of Fiesta is Laura Hernández-Ehrisman’s 2008 book Inventing the Fiesta City: Heritage and Carnival in San Antonio, and it’s a worthwhile read for socio-historical nerds like me.

But why should non-San Antones

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 27 | July 8, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

care about Fiesta? Because it illustrates America’s eternal bowdlerization project with ethnics. Here in the Southwest, we’re used to gabachos celebrating their vanquished wabs, from Olvera Street in Los Angeles to the cactus-leaning sleeping peons of Tucson to the Hispanic histrionics of Santa Fe and the gabacha queens of Fiesta. But at least those civic boosters liked some aspect of us, no matter how twisted or “Spanish” their fantasy heritage for us was; that was better than the reverse whitewashing happening now, where we see the swarthy masses of the past now lionized as the antiMexicans: the immigrants who came to this country greeted with open arms and no discrimination because they were legal.

The historical record disproves those narratives no matter how many weepymoany chain e-mails Know Nothings send contrasting the immigrants of the past with the Mexicans of today. I say, give me the gabacha Fiesta queens over any romanticized Sicilian any day of the semana.

Dear Mexican, How come all the really hot girls are on the Mexican television stations? I watch the Spanish talent shows, news reports, and soap operas to see the really hot girls.

Compared to the gabacho stations, there is no comparison. Just last night, I compared the average women on the local stations,

that look like the majority of out-of-shape girls I see every day, to the hot sexy Latin chicks. It’s a bit of a problem in that I end up sitting watching television, not knowing what the hell the people are saying, and not really caring.

— More of a Paulina Rubio Guy than a Thalia One Dear Gabacho, Because Mexican television executives bowdlerize our culture even better than gabachos. The day a telenovela or nationally aired program casts a darkskinned, chubby woman as a lead who’s not playing an Indian maid, is not a comic foil, and isn’t a saintly mother—you know, a gordita portrayed as an actual person—is the day Arpayaso joins MEChA. Dear Mexican, I read that Arizona State Senator Russell Pearce is questioning the 14th Amendment, which states that anyone born in the United States is a citizen of the United States. I believe the last senator who questioned that law was a cartoon senator on the The Rocky and Bullwinkle Show. Am I correct?

— J.T. Ready is a Pendejo Dear Wab, No, I think you meant Benjamin Tillman, the South Carolina Democrat who liked lynching the way Mexican men like gabachas.