The Pulse - Vol. 7, Issue 49 by Brewer Media Group

Chattanooga’s Weekly Alternative

FREE • News, Views, Music, Film, Arts & Entertainment • December 9, 2010 • Volume 7, Issue 49 • www.chattanoogapulse.com

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Contributing Editor Janis Hashe News Editor / Art Director Gary Poole Director of Sales Rhonda Rollins Advertising Sales Rick Leavell, Townes Webb Calendar Editors Bryanna Burns, Reginald Owens Graphic Design Jennifer Grelier Contributing Writers Gustavo Arellano, Maggie Behringer Rob Brezsny, Chuck Crowder John DeVore, Janis Hashe Joshua Hurley, Matt Jones Reginald Owens, Ernie Paik Alex Teach, Tara V. Editorial Cartoonist Rick Baldwin Editorial Interns Blake Hampton, Reginald Owens Contact Info: Phone (423) 265-9494 Fax (423) 266-2335 Email Inquiries info@chattanoogapulse.com Calendar Submissions calendar@chattanoogapulse.com The Pulse is published weekly and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publishers may take more than one copy per weekly issue. The Pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors.

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Brewer Media 1305 Carter Street Chattanooga, Tennessee 37402 Letters to the editor must include name, address and daytime phone number for verification. The Pulse reserves the right to edit letters for space and clarity. Please keep letters within 300 words in length. The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on culture, the arts, entertainment and local news.

cover story

Contents

Publisher Zachary Cooper

2010

President Jim Brewer, II

ee w xt ne

Chattanooga’s Weekly Alternative

AL SS e NU LE S uls AN ME IE e P R h HO IA in T

DECEMBER

12 WHY DO WE LOVE THIS CHRISTMAS STORY SO MUCH?

By Maggie Behringer It all begins with a department store window lavishly dressed for the holiday season and a small, red-cheeked boy glued to the glass with his eyes honed in on the gleaming Red Ryder BB gun. From there was born the tongue-twister answer to the perennial question, “What do you want for Christmas?”

news & views

feature stories 18 CAMP OUT WITH SOME GOOD MUSIC By Tara V. Seven people moved from the New York City area with an idea for building a space that not only housed a community, but also gave substantial and clean recording capabilities.

25 A DAY FOR McKAY By Reginald Owens Everyone has a movie that they fell in love with at some time but haven’t been able to find any trace of it since. There’s always that one book that took your imagination farther than it’s ever been when you were 12 years old—but it seems to be out of print, missing from every bookstore.

32 TANGLED DECENT DISNEY HAIR APPARENT By John DeVore My editor mentioned to me after my last review that some themes are timeless. Disney knows how to package those themes for a mass audience. They have the market cornered on traditional fairytales.

5 6 10 17 30 38

PULSE BEATS BEYOND THE HEADLINES INSIDE POLITICS ON THE BEAT LIFE IN THE NOOG ASK A MEXICAN

everything else 4 5 9 9 19 20 26 34 36 37

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR CITY COUNCILSCOPE POLICE BLOTTER THE LIST NEW MUSIC REVIEWS MUSIC CALENDAR A&E CALENDAR SPIRITS WITHIN FREE WILL ASTROLOGY JONESIN’ CROSSWORD

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Letters to the Editor Domestic Violence I would like to commend The Pulse for its bold and sobering cover regarding domestic violence. This cover and correlating article mostly definitely elevates The Pulse from its commonly regarded position as a local entertainment magazine, to a respected news publication. The tragic death of Shae Wiser rocked many people in our community, as it should. The issue of domestic violence is one that affects all of us, and awareness needs to be heightened to assist those victims in need. Thank you, Chattanooga Pulse, for presenting this issue in a way that makes us all PAY ATTENTION. Stacey L. Nolan, M.Ed. I knew Shae. She was a very sweet girl. Thank you all for not letting this kind of thing be swept under the rug. There is a “Fringe Benefit” planned for December 10th at Alicia’s Dance Cheer and Tumbling on Hwy 153 beside the WalMart. All proceeds will go to help those affected by domestic violence in the Chattanooga area. In addition to a great belly dance performance,

there will be a raffle for various local gifts and services. Shae was student of belly dance for awhile as well. Lacy Dickerson Please be a good neighbor. If an argument sounds like it’s getting physical, CALL THE POLICE. It’s not a guarantee things will get better, but it lets the beater know that someone thinks what he is doing is a crime. Karla Evans Corker vs. the UAW Good for Sen. Corker! No need for the UAW to bankrupt another company so their unskilled labor can get way more than they’re worth and the work rules causing even higher costs. Let the market play out and let VW turn a profit and take care of the employees accordingly. If anyone doesn’t like it, feel free to go and find a different job! Ray Burzynski Blaming the people who put the cars together is a misguided point of view. GM collapsed under the weight of ineffective management. They wanted to build gas-

guzzling SUVs and were unable to quickly shift their product mix to more fuel efficient vehicles when the market demanded it. They also sold off their finance arm, GMAC, which could have provided them with customer financing as the banks put the squeeze on credit. These critical errors occurred in board rooms, and not on an assembly line. Bob Corker is touting the party line and using this as a way to bash unions. Rick Fitzgerald Harry Potter Occult Silliness The only thing more laughable than the idea of Harry Potter turning the nation’s youth into occult magicians is the inability of certain people to separate fiction from reality. Sane people know there are no “real” spells or potions even if the Harry Potter series truly draws ideas from books written on those subjects, which I doubt. Though if our children are all as thick as some letter writers, then maybe we do have a problem on our hands after all. And it isn’t Harry Potter. D. Johnson

Send all letters to the editor and questions to info@chattanoogapulse.com We reserve the right to edit letters for content and space. Please include your full name, city and contact information.

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Pulse Beats

Quote Of The Week:

A rundown of the newsy, the notable, and the notorious...

“People have light bills higher than their rent and the housing authority is suing them and putting them out for that. Ever since I said something about that, all eyes are on me.” — Former East Lake Courts resident leader Deborah Henry, who claims the Housing Authority has singled her out for eviction for speaking out.

Amazon.com’s Christmas Present It wasn’t exactly the best-kept secret in town during the past month, but last week it become official that city and county leaders (both in Hamilton and Bradley) have been working closely with executives from Seattle-based Amazon.com to locate two large facilities in the region. Fred Kiga, Amazon’s director of policy, appeared before both the Chattanooga City Council and the Hamilton County Commission last week, seeking a package of tax breaks in exchange for a substantial monetary and employment investment in the community. And while the deal appears to be near completion, Trevor Hamilton with the Chamber of Commerce did clarify that it is not yet a done deal. “While we are very optimistic and encouraged by Amazon.com’s interest in the community, we still have things yet to do to complete the process,” he said. “The transaction is not complete,” Kiga confirmed. “We still have a few hurdles to overcome. However, we are very optimistic.” One of those hurdles was cleared as both the Chattanooga City Council and Hamilton County Commission, by unanimous votes, approved a number of tax incentives for the online retailer. Among the largest is an agreement that exempts Amazon from having to pay property taxes or taxes on equipment for 11 years. However, they will have to pay stormwater fees and school taxes, which officials say are necessary for the community as a whole. The plans are for Amazon.Com to build not one, but two, million-square-foot facilities

in the region, one in Enterprise South near Volkswagen, and another in Bradley County in its industrial park. The Chattanooga facility will employ nearly 1,250 full-time workers, and will serve as a fulfillment center. The Bradley County facility will have a much smaller staff, as it will focus on the larger, bulkier items requiring larger storage. If all the hurdles are cleared, the $100 million project could begin construction as early as next month, with company officials hoping the fulfillment centers will be up and running before Christmas of 2011. And in even more good news, city and county insiders say that at least three more

Here is one of the more interesting agenda items set to be discussed at the Tuesday, December 14 meeting of the Chattanooga City Council. 6. Ordinances – First Reading:

large projects are currently on the table, which could bring in several thousand more jobs, both to the various industrial parks but also to the downtown Chattanooga area, where more than a million square feet of office space remains empty.

Sen. Corker Warns VW About the UAW

Senator Bob Corker (R-TN) has given Volkswagen officials some advice. He says it would be in their best interest to keep the United Auto Workers union out of their shop. Sen. Corker, responding to a number of questions about his statement, insists he is not anti-union, but his experience in dealing with the UAW recently makes him think the group would not be a good fit in Chattanooga. The former Chattanooga mayor was on the negotiation team in 2008 when GM and Chrysler were asking for a federal bailout. He said union leadership was “less than helpful” in those talks. For their part, Volkswagen officials are staying neutral, saying it will be up to their employees as to whether the union will organize their workplace.

b) An ordinance to amend Chattanooga City Code, Part II, Chapter 38, Zoning Ordinance, by amending Section 38-502 and adding new Sections 38-13, 38-528 and 38529 to identify certain areas of scenic value and establish a special exceptions permit relative to the regulation of structure heights in such areas. The Chattanooga Planning Commission recently approved a proposed zoning amendment that would protect a number of historic city hillsides. The change would require special permits to construct any commercial building more than 35 feet tall on sections of Orchard Knob, Lookout Mountain, Missionary Ridge, Stringer’s Ridge and Billy Goat Hill. The proposal now goes before the city council for final approval, where it is has already received positive support. The Chattanooga City Council meets each Tuesday at 6 p.m. in the City Council Building at 1000 Lindsay St. For more information on the agenda and minutes from past city council meetings, visit www.Chattanooga.gov/City_Council

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Beyond The Headlines

Ochs Center Study Reveals State of the Economy By Janis Hashe

ccording to a major report released Tuesday, December 6 by the Ochs Center, “Economy: The State of the Region 2010”, the Chattanooga Metropolitan Statistical Area (MSA) has struggled through a difficult decade, with major job losses in traditional industry and manufacturing sectors. But the report also points to sustained growth in other sectors, and essentially reaffirms what other data has pointed out: The region is heading in the right direction to recover jobs, and is in fact ahead of much of the rest of the country. “Between 2001 and 2009, employment in the MSA declined by six percent—largely due to job losses that took place during the recession that began in December 2007. Between 2007 and 2009, three of the region’s largest sectors—transportation and warehousing (26.2%), construction (-22.7%), and manufacturing (-19.1%) —experienced declines in employment of more than 15%”, the report’s summary notes. But, it continues, “Employment in computer and mathematical occupations increased more than 120% between 2001 and 2009, up from 1,730 to 3,380—the fastest growth of any occupation category in the region. While employment in health care practitioner and technical occupations grew at a slightly slower rate (48%), there were over 5,000 more workers employed in these occupations in 2009 than in 2001. Between 2001 and 2009, private sector employment in Hamilton County declined by more than 10,000 jobs. Manufacturing sustained the greatest job losses—down from 29,990 in 2001 to 20,723 in 2009. During the same period, the number of workers in health care and social assistance grew by 52.8%, a total increase of 7,525 jobs.” The report surveyed opinions about employment across

the spectrum of the region’s inhabitants. “Almost threequarters of respondents to the 2010 Ochs Center survey respondents indicated that they considered the quality and availability of jobs in Hamilton County ‘fair’ or ‘poor’— with little change from prior surveys,” the summary states. “The percentage rating conditions as ‘excellent’ or ‘good’ declined from 28% in 2006 and 2008 to 22% in 2010.” This was not surprising in light of the impact of the recession and subsequent “jobless recovery.” Another major point made by the lengthy report is that “Economic opportunity frequently depends on educational attainment. A 2010 survey of Hamilton County residents found that 45% of respondents with a high school education or less rated job employment availability as poor, a rate more than twice the rate for college graduates. In Hamilton County, for individuals 25 years and older without a high school degree, the poverty rate is 26%—nearly three times the overall 10% rate and more than eight times the poverty rate among adults with a college degree.”

a high school degree ($26,894) and more than double the median earnings of an individual without a high school diploma ($19,405).” The individuals surveyed appeared well aware of this. “Respondents with a high school education or less were more than twice as likely to rate the employment situation as ‘poor’ compared to college graduates (45% vs. 20%). Similarly, 27% of college graduates rated job availability as excellent or good in the 2010 survey—down from a high of 32% in 2006, but higher than the percentage for those respondents with a high school education or less (20%) or some college (18%).” The race of respondents also influenced their perceptions of the job market. “As in prior years, whites were more likely to rate the availability of jobs as ‘excellent’ or ‘good’ and African Americans were more likely to rate availability as ‘poor’.” Again, the tie between jobs and education was obvious: “Based on American Community Survey data from 2006 to 2008, 26% of county residents 25 years or older have a college degree. Whites in Hamilton County were almost twice as likely to have a college degree as African Americans and nearly one-third of men held college degrees compared to only one quarter of all women.” Yet, the report points out, there is progress in gender equity. “In fact, it appears that the gender gap has reversed among younger residents, with female college attainment higher than for males in the 25-34 and the same in the 35-44 age groups.” Though the survey demands much further study to draw in-depth conclusions, some points are clear: The well-paying jobs that are being created in our region will demand an educated workforce. That Tennessee and Hamilton County have made major progress in graduating students from high school is significant—but those students, both black and white, will need additional education beyond high school, and had better be prepared by the schools for the demands of that education.

“Employment in computer and mathematical occupations increased more than 120% between 2001 and 2009…the fastest growth of any occupation category in the region.”

Later, the summary states, “Income and employment are increasingly associated with educational attainment… Nationwide, individuals without a high school diploma were approximately three times more likely to be unemployed over that time period than those with at least a bachelor’s degree…There is also a well-documented gap in income based on educational attainment. As of 2007, median annual earnings for workers 25 years old and older with a college degree ($46,805) were significantly higher than earnings for a worker with some college ($32,874) or

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

A weekly roundup of the newsworthy, notable and often head-scratching stories gleaned from police reports from the Chattanooga Police Department, the Hamilton County Sheriff’s Office, the Bradley County Sheriff’s Department and the Dalton Police Department.

• The rock band Styx once famously sang, “I’m tired of running and I’m so far from my home.” A 29-year-old Walker County inmate and his wife must have agreed with the musical sentiment and turned themselves in to authorities after the man escaped a work detail last week. The inmate was serving a 20-year sentence for a drug conviction, and will now add felony escape to his record. His wife borrowed an SUV to help in the escape, and not only does she now face charges of felony aiding escape, the woman who loaned her the truck was also arrested and if convicted of helping to facilitate the escape, could be sentenced from one-tofive years in the state penitentiary. • According to a mayoral spokesman, it was an “unfortunate thing to do” but it still had to be done. After receiving numerous complaints from nearby residents, city employees and police officers cleared out the vagrant camp underneath the I-24 overpass at Broad Street. Unfortunately, the homeless who had been sheltering there have few alternatives. The city has no emergency shelter, only what local charities can

provide, and those shelters simply do not have enough space for all the homeless currently living on the streets in Chattanooga. The city spokesman said that officers and workers did their best to treat the homeless with “dignity”, but the fact remains that there are very few places within the city for the homeless to go. • Two Hamilton County residents weren’t so lucky at Lucky’s Bar and Grill last week. They were charged with gambling when the place was raided by authorities. One was charged with gambling promotion and possession of drug paraphernalia, while the other faces charges of gambling promotion and possession of gaming devices. Law enforcement officers didn’t stop there, either. Three more people were arrested in a similar raid at The Willow Street Inn the same day. One was charged with possession of gaming devices, while the other two were picked up for gambling and possession of gambling records. Seriously, folks, if you really want to gamble, there are legal places to do so within a few hours drive of the city.

You Know You Live In Chattanooga…

• If police officers are one thing above all others, it’s patient. They know that eventually even the most elusive bad guys will come to justice. Such was the case last week when a man with a long criminal record, who had successfully eluded officers in a lengthy high-speed chase through East Chattanooga just days earlier, was taken into custody after a much shorter chase. Even better, the career criminal then helped to clear books on a dozen recent burglaries after confessing to police. During questioning, he admitted to a number of recent break-ins and officers recovered a number of stolen items from his residence. During the past 13 years, the man pleaded guilty to two dozen crimes, with the last leading to a three-year prison sentence in November of 2008 (which, obviously, he did not fully serve).

1. …if you think the “W” Road isn’t that bad. 2. …if you buy bread and milk whenever Paul Barys says it might snow. 3. …if you go to McKay’s to hang out with friends. 4. …if you give directions that include the Aquarium or the “big pink building”. 5. …if you buy beer on Sunday to take to your North Georgia friends. 6. …if you think of the Chattanooga Choo Choo as a hotel and not a song. 7. …if you think of North Georgia as a suburb but Atlanta as a foreign country. 8. …if you see goats eating kudzu on the side of the Ridge Cut, and don’t give them a second look. 9. …if you immediately call Luther as soon as a dog goes missing.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Inside Politics

Mr. Ramsey Goes To Nashville By Gary Poole

ven since Knoxville mayor Bill Haslam won the gubernatorial race to succeed Phil Bredesen as Tennessee’s governor, political watchers across the state have been curious about whom he would select for his immediate staff. And while the timing might have caught a number of people off guard, no one in this part of the state seems surprised that Hamilton County Mayor Claude Ramsey has been chosen to become chief of staff for Haslam when the latter takes office.

“People are very happy for Claude, though a little bittersweet [that he’s leaving]. I think that’s a good sign that I hired the right person,” Haslam said after a Friday morning news conference from the county commission chambers. “Every person up here said, ‘You hired a great person and we’re really going to miss him’.” The number of political leaders lined up to heap praise on the 67-year-old Ramsey, who had just begun his fifth term as county mayor, was impressive: county commissioners, city council members, local business leaders, even a sitting U.S. senator, who admittedly has a bit of personal experience in working with Ramsey. “Bill sought the best person in the state for this position, and in Claude, Bill has found that person. Claude Ramsey is a remarkable person and the epitome of a true public servant,” said Senator Bob Corker. “When I served as Chattanooga’s mayor, we began many mornings with a phone call. He was an incredible partner, particularly in economic development. He will be a tremendous asset to the Haslam administration as they work to recruit business and bring good jobs to Tennessee, and I look forward to him

replicating his efforts in Hamilton County in counties across our state. But it was more than just praise for past accomplishments, of which Ramsey has many. “I love change, and we will use this to our advantage,” said Chattanooga mayor Ron Littlefield. “I said to governorelect Haslam and to Claude, ‘Don’t change your cell phone number’.” Even in the rather unlikely case that Ramsey does get a new number, it’s certain that everyone in Hamilton County and the surrounding areas will have it. And the impact on the region of Ramsey becoming Haslam’s chief of staff, considered the most powerful non-elected position in state government, is major. For a long time, Chattanooga has been the “nice little city on the Georgia border” as far as many of the political movers-and-shakers in the state were concerned. The attention (and state money) was almost always focused on Memphis, Nashville and Knoxville. Being the fourth-largest city in a three-city state was often quite frustrating for our local political and business leaders. But one only has to look at the changes to the region in just the past five years to know that Chattanooga is not only transforming itself economically, but has arguably become the most important city in the entire state for economic development. Volkswagen. Alstom. Amazon.com. Those are the big industry names that have recently decided to make this area home, bringing with them hundreds of millions of dollars in investments and thousands of new jobs. And those are just the big names. Literally dozens of new businesses have located or re-located into the metro region during the past decade, and the influx of new development is accelerating. Certainly no one can dispute that Claude Ramsey has been one of the most important people behind this economic push. In the 16 years he’s served as county mayor, he has

“Being the fourth-largest city in a three-city state was often quite frustrating for our local political and business leaders.”

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traveled the country and the world, not on political “factfinding” trips, but on serious attempts to woo manufacturers and other companies to Hamilton County. One only has to drive by Enterprise South or down Riverfront Parkway to see the results of Ramsey’s efforts. Governor-elect Haslam, during his campaign, said economic development would be one of the most important goals for his administration. His hiring of Claude Ramsey shows that such statements were not just campaign-trail blather, but rather a serious statement of intent. Ramsey’s national and international contacts will serve the entire state well, as he helps shepherd even more business and manufacturing into a state that is fast becoming one of the stronger economic engines in the entire Southeast. Ramsey’s experience, combined with his knowledge and passion for this part of the state, means that Chattanoogans will no longer be considered as amusing but not-veryserious country cousins by Nashville. Instead, the eyes of the state will be focused on our accomplishments; at the same time they meet the man who personally oversaw so many of those accomplishments. “This community is poised for real progress,” Ramsey said after the Friday morning press conference. “Real opportunity is coming here, and that is important to me.” The words of a man who is taking on a new challenge— but not for a moment forgetting his roots.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Cover Story

Why Do We Love This Christmas Story So Much? By Maggie Behringer • Photos by Aaron Benjamin Ellison

“‘You’ll shoot your eye out,’ the hallowed triple dog dare, and the once-loathsome, now tacky-chic luminous leg lamp as bits of the movie have seamlessly become part of our collective memory.” 12

I t all begins with a department store window lavishly dressed for the holiday

season and a small, red-cheeked boy glued to the glass with his eyes honed in on the gleaming Red Ryder BB gun. From there was born the tongue-twister answer to the perennial question, “What do you want for Christmas?” uttered in rapid-fire succession by the same wide-eyed boy: a Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot range model air rifle.

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The department store is Higbee’s, the town is Hammond, Indiana, the boy is Ralphie Parker and the movie is, of course, A Christmas Story. Butting right up to the now traditional 24-hour marathon showing on TBS, the Chattanooga Theatre Centre is reviving its production of the Christmas classic. The Youth Theatre and MainStage collaboration opens on the main stage on December 10 and runs to the 23rd.

Cover Story “I think it’s something that’s been a part of our lives without us even knowing,” says Maria Chattin-Carter, now in her eighth season as the CTC’s Youth Theatre Director and also directing this show. She points to the parental admonishment “You’ll shoot your eye out,” the hallowed triple dog dare, and the once-loathsome, now tacky-chic luminous leg lamp as bits of the movie that have seamlessly become part of our collective memory. According to ChattinCarter, when the CTC presented A Christmas Story in 2004 and 2005, the mere sight of the crate housing the infamous leg lamp and the iced flagpole on which Ralphie’s friend Flick gets his tongue stuck elicited gales of laughter. What is it about the story that evokes such a warm familiarity? Chattin-Carter’s family has a long-standing tradition with the story. She and her husband, a true devotee who can recite the entire movie and played the Old Man in the CTC’s first production, watched it during their first Christmas together. After watching the play, Chattin-Carter’s son, 3 years old at the time, memorized Ralphie’s elementary-school teacher Miss Shield’s monologue. When asked about Christmas memories of the movie, people have a whole range of answers, more often than not accompanied by fully animated moments of acting out each section of the movie being referenced. They waddle awkwardly with arms stuck out to the side playing the younger brother, Randy, doomed each day to be stuffed and stretched in a full winter suit so ridiculous his range of motion is limited to a penguin shuffle. People wince as they protect their tongues from the excruciating scene of Flick’s encounter with

the flagpole. They likewise protect their mouths from a soap washing meant to clean out the Queen Mother of Dirty Words, F-dash-dash-dash. The clip reel goes on to include giggles over the leg lamp and the Old Man’s perpetual struggle with the clanking furnace, expressions of solidarity over Ralphie’s ultimate pummeling of the snot-nosed bully Farkus or surprise at the creepy Santa Claus and elf crew, and stories of similar Christmas turkeys or hams abducted by household animals. Posed on Facebook, the question of Christmas memories of the movie elicited the typed version of the above acting in breathless ellipses. One particularly amusing response was a memory of the movie’s “mischievousness” and a feeling of naughtiness when watching it as a child. “My memory of A Christmas Story is being snuggled up on a cold winter evening watching the movie on television and being transported to cold winters from my childhood in Illinois where the holidays always included playing for hours in the snow,” recalls CTC

“For the director, the focus is not so much on the literal translation of a 1940s house, but the fuzzy, slightly altered remembered version.”

Producing Director George Quick. For Jan Belk, CTC director of marketing and PR, it’s the play that takes the cake: “I first saw the stage production of A Christmas Story when the CTC did it in 2004 and I love the humor and fun of the live show much more than I liked the movie version. Since that Christmas, coming to the CTC has come to be one of my favorite holiday traditions.” While the memories are evidence of the remarkable place A Christmas Story has in today’s Christmas experience, leave it to a child to put words to the rather simple reason it remains such a vivid part of the holiday. “It’s a story that all kids can relate to in terms of wanting something parents don’t approve of,” says Isabel Dillard, who plays Esther Jane in the CTC production. We were all once that child so attached to that one Christmas present, which, against all (to us) plausible

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Cover Story arguments, a parent dismissed as the most improbable, outrageous gift imaginable. Remembering childhood is a pastime best enjoyed when the memories pit us against ridiculous parents in dramatic injustices like Ralphie’s quest for the Red Ryder. However, despite the fact that 2010 will mark the fourteenth year a Time Warner station has aired the 24-hour marathon event, the movie was not beloved when first released. It opened the week before Thanksgiving in 1983 and most critics were unimpressed, to say the least. New York Times reviewer Vincent Canby began his critique of the movie with this biting appraisal: “There are a number of small, unexpectedly funny moments in A Christmas Story, but you have to possess the stamina of a pearl diver to find them.” He lauded screenwriter Jean Shepherd’s humor and harped on director Bob Clark’s heavy hand, as well as taking issue with the fictional Warren G. Harding Elementary School’s curriculum choice of a George Elliot novel for 9 year olds. Though Leonard Maltin hailed it a “Top Screen Comedy”, the movie was out of every theater in the country with a handful of exceptions by Christmas of 1983. A Christmas Story, the movie, grew out of five short stories by Shepherd, three of which were originally published between 1964 and 1966 in the all-time family magazine, Playboy, while readings of the other two, titled Duel in the Snow, or Red Ryder nails the Cleveland Street Kid and Flick’s Tongue, were broadcast on a talk show on the New York City-area radio station WOR. Shepherd wrote the script with his wife, Leigh Brown, and Clark, in addition to guiding the audience through

the rose-colored look at his childhood as the adult Ralphie’s voice. Though rumor has it Jack Nicholson considered the Old Man role, Clark tapped Darrin McGavin for the part. McGavin had previously gained a following as the lead in the ABC series Kolchak: The Night Stalker and as a stage actor. The younger among us might also recognize him as Adam Sandler’s father in Billy Madison. Melinda Dillon, the one moment cooing, one moment shrieking mother, had worked with Clark in Close Encounters of the Third Kind. Peter Billingsley, who provided children with an eternal kindred spirit as Ralphie, is still in the business, now as an Emmynominated producer. HBO was the first to air the movie on television in the mid-1980s. Over the next decade, it bounced around several networks, including TBS, TCM, TNT, and FOX, and had a stint as the inaugural Christmas season film airing on Thanksgiving night. In 1997,

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

TNT launched its first 24-hour marathon, which was transferred to TBS in 2004. According to Clark, speaking on DVD commentary, one in six Americans watched at least one showing of the marathon in 2002. A Christmas Story mania now includes an online store, aptly named redriderleglamps.com, where authentic leg lamps, adult-and child-sized pink bunny suits, and collectibles such as decoder pens and soap, are all for sale. In 2000, playwright Philip Grecian adapted the screenplay for the stage and since then the CTC is hardly the only playhouse celebrating the holiday season with the “tribute to the original, traditional, one-hundred-percent, red-blooded, two-fisted, all-American Christmas.” This year, both the Actors Theatre of Louisville and Georgia Shakespeare Festival in Atlanta have their own productions. “We’re trying to keep it as close to movie as possible,” Chattin-Carter said at a recent rehearsal. “When you’re doing a show as iconic as A Christmas Story, you have to.” The set, influenced by a black-and-white palette, will be familiar to those who saw the previous CTC productions. For the director, the focus is not so much on the literal translation of a 1940s house, but the fuzzy, slightly altered remembered version. This interpretation fits with Chattin-Carter’s overall view of the play and one of the chords it hits with each audience member. “It’s not what the house looks like,” she explains. “It’s more what it feels like to him. What he remembers is a time when there was still this magic.” There are a few new characters in the play version,

Cover Story “Remembering childhood is a pastime best enjoyed when the memories pit us against ridiculous parents in dramatic injustices like Ralphie’s quest for the Red Ryder.” namely two female classmates, Esther Jane and Helen Weathers, and those keen on the Farkus storyline will miss his toadie. The CTC’s younger cast members are quick to point out the play has much more appropriate language than the movie and the “flow” is better. All self-professed believers in Santa Claus or as they have dubbed him, the Big Man and the High King, the cast is for the most part new to the CTC. Bennett Kutchins, playing Helen Weathers, Christopher Cooper, playing Farkus, and Dillard have appeared in Youth Theatre productions. Andrew Dickerson, who recently moved from Mississippi where he had performed in seven plays, as Ralphie, Alex Robinson as Flick, Dylan Tate as Schwartz, and Mathew Wesolowski are all new to the Chattanooga theater scene. “All of us now are having so much fun doing this and having this experience,” says Tate. Their fun is tangible, even in rehearsal. Just like catching any scene in the movie immediately draws a viewer back into the story, watching a rehearsal offers those instant moments of recognition. Chattin-Carter remembers several “ahha” auditions and that the group fell into place rather easily. Anchoring the cast, John Meldorf serves as the pitch-perfect narrator to tell the story as the adult Ralphie. His rich voice and nuanced inflection imbues the words with that nostalgic quality unique to A Christmas Story. A long-time attorney in Chattanooga, Meldorf saw the movie in the theaters with his late father and a friend the first weekend it opened. The Sterling, Illinois native also clearly remembers the Christmas parades and the trips to pick the right tree from the tree farm as part

of his childhood. Meldorf ’s youngest daughter puts up the same nativity scene today he arranged every year as a boy, and though he admits to having a plastic tree these days, its branches are decorated with antique ornaments. Also new to the CTC stage, Meldorf notably last appeared in a play in 1979. He acted as the Clarence Darrow character, the defense lawyer, in Inherit the Wind, the play depicting the 1925 Scopes “Monkey” Trial. It was the first year the play was performed in Dayton, Tennessee, where the real trial had unfolded 54 years before. As for A Christmas Story, Meldorf teases he didn’t know what he was getting into, but his clear fondness for the story belies his joke. “Beyond the religious significance, the traditions are the things that make Christmas what it is,” he says. While the cast anticipates the audience is likely to know most of the lines, the actors hope their production can offer a bit more than a trivia test. The younger players look forward to spreading the holiday spirit, as well as outdoing the movie. Meldorf expects that the audience will supply as much energy as the actors. Chattin-Carter is shooting for the laughs and the play’s ultimate Christmas message. “You can’t forget that it’s such as heartwarming story,” she says. “In the end, it doesn’t matter if you’ve got the BB gun or not if you’ve got love.”

A Christmas Story $30 opening night gala $20 - $25 depending on performance remainder of run December 10 – 23 Chattanooga Theatre Centre, Main Stage, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

On The Beat

By Alex Teach

A Cop’s Christmas Buying Guide I

“You can add anything to the list with black nylon and Velcro, and they’re in. IN. It could be an ‘Uncle Mike’s Hair Dryer Holster’— we don’t really care for some reason.” When Officer Alexander D. Teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he is an occasional student, carpenter, boating enthusiast, and spends his spare time volunteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center. To contact him directtly, follow him on Facebook at www.facebook.com/alex.teach

couldn’t sleep.

My normal response is to read, but I couldn’t flip on the switch to do so because I’d recently had my girlfriend move in and by turning on the light I might as well be splashing her with ice water or stabbing bunnies with an ice pick on an elementary school playground. I crept out of bed and went into the living room, taking half a minute to shut the door and slowly release the knob with the intensity of a bank robber listening for tumblers to click on a vault’s combination lock. From there I tiptoed over to my recliner, holding my breath, and flipped on the Xbox, but not before reducing the TV’s volume to level two. (It is a scientifically proven fact that sleeping women can hear a mouse pissing on a cotton ball from a football field away, and as you can imagine, I already give women enough things to be upset about; this is part of my genius in the ways of women, after all.) Despite my precautions, she awoke instantly, as if I’d been marching like a drill sergeant banging a garbage can with a baseball bat. She might have lain there gritting her perfectly aligned teeth for as long as 12 seconds, but after 20 seconds, she was in the doorway with one of the four additional blankets she had on the bed draped around her as she asked, “Is this really necessary?!” I sighed and turned off the television by remote, and she stomped back to bed fuming while I sat in the dark. (Again, I am a genius in the ways of women.) I was annoyed because I wanted to play; it distracts me and clears my head, but I cannot play it in the daytime because it indicates I am

ignoring her and creates a “problem between us”, so, being a genius, I don’t play it. That leaves the time when she is not there, during which I am usually working a perpetual cop “side job”, catching up on laundry, vacuuming (in perfectly straight lines lest I leave it to her and see vacuum wheel tracks all over the place, patches clearly missed, never mind the visual chaos…wait, what were we talking about?) or any number of the other things required of a civilized life. Trash doesn’t empty itself, shower scum doesn’t turn to dust, not everyone can afford to eat out for every meal, and laundry can’t all be fixed with Febreze and being hung outside in the wind overnight, you know? All of this leaves game-playing time to sleepless nights, and even those are a crapshoot as indicated above. The reason I’m saying all this is that ironically enough, the goddamn Xbox was a gift from her, “for all the hard work I do.” So long as I don’t play it, we’re golden. My best friend and Academy mate’s girlfriend bought him a Mossberg 500A 12 gauge with an anodized barrel. Anodized, people. The trunk of a cop car isn’t waterproof, and this little gift, credited to the British in the 1920s, is a blessing for folks such as myself who work with temperamental metals such as the common blued-steel of revolvers and shotguns from the last century…but I digress. My point is, she bought him a shotgun. (Anodized.) Another fellow received not one, but two of the evolutionary peaks of the K9 world: Labradors. They were black (unlike the truly perfected brown version). She bought him two dogs, people. Dogs! Jeans. Bass Pro Shop gift cards. Swim

trunks that can be wadded up into their own pocket, zipped up, and stored in a glove box in case you came upon something that needed swimming in but didn’t have the attire necessary or the ability to explain nudity if needed in a pinch, as in the case of a large residential fountain or downtown riverfront as has come up with unusual frequency (for me, anyway). THOSE are the things you buy guys. (I’ve had a pair of those shorts in my truck(s) for nearly ten years now and never once used them, but will I get rid of them? Oh hell no. Just in case.) And if they’re cops? You can add anything to the list with black nylon and Velcro, and they’re in. IN. It could be an “Uncle Mike’s Hair Dryer Holster”—we don’t really care for some reason. Add a D-ring hook to it somehow, and they’ll sleep with it like a teddy bear. But if you really want to make your cop happy? Get him a flashlight. Any flashlight, big or small. Again, I cannot explain it, but hand your man a Streamlight 180 Lumen LED flashlight and you’ll think the guy was just given a bar of gold signed by Arnold Schwarzenegger at a Swedish Bikini Team competition sponsored by Jack Daniels on Hooker Island. As for gift ideas for the female police officer in your life, you’re reading the wrong column, folks. But trust me on the flashlights. As for me this year? No real surprises, since I already accidentally stumbled upon her gift stash (she only recently moved in, making hiding anything admittedly difficult). It was a new version of Halo…for the Xbox. I should have seen it coming. (I am a genius in the ways of women, after all.)

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Music Feature

Camp Out with Some Good Music By Tara V.

even people moved from the New York City area with an idea for building a space that not only housed a community, but also gave substantial and clean recording capabilities. That city they moved to wasn’t Atlanta, Chicago, LA, or Miami. The city these NYC friends chose was our own Chattanooga. Are you kidding? I was stunned. Chris Sorenson and his band Even Song Rising are running a new venue, The Camp House, located at 1427 Williams Street on the Southside, and have already welcomed many of our local talents inside. Upon arrival, I was surprised and pleased to see some familiar faces on that Friday morning. Ms. Annie at the Windfarm Coffee Bar & Cafe made my uncultured self an amazing Rwandan brew that I didn’t even cover with Splenda. Enjoying my brunch to the point of forgetting I was there to work, I said good-bye to an excited music man, George Parker, and sat down with Chris Sorenson. On the big comfy leather couch we discussed the space and schedule of events. After hearing the names of performers throughout the week and watching local artist Lana Goodman and husband Steve hang her art on the walls, I started to get that fluffy feeling. Maybe it was double-shot espresso induced, but I began to see why George might have been so excited. Judging solely by the open-loft-style atmosphere of The Camp House, you might not imagine it has the qualities of a live recording studio. Yet every detail has been thought through to assure even the slightest buzz wouldn’t make it

into the tracks. This idea came when Chris and his crew realized the rising cost of studio recording for their own band and wanted to not only lessen it for themselves, but also others in what has become a true listening and live recording room. On Monday nights you can enjoy the sounds of Rick Rushing & The Blues Strangers. Tuesday nights, Troy Underwood provides a Songwriter’s Line-Up and on Thursdays, Noah Collins hosts an open mic. Friday and Saturday Nights are open to local and national acts, with this month featuring Infinite Orange on December 11 and Jettison Never December 18. Earlier in the week I sat down with Christian Collier, poet and host of an event every second Friday of the month entitled Manifest. This month, it’s December 10 and is themed “Sisters-in-Arms”. This evening will light the stage with an all-female round of three lovely ladies: Amber Fults, Holly Cross McCormack and Dana Rogers. Amber Fults of RossVegas has been playing in Chattanooga for a while now and I can still remember the first night she blew me away with her golden lungs. Her music is very personal and she puts herself in every song she writes—but make sure and request her cover of “Sweet Child o’ Mine “as it may cause a few teardrops. (Don’t tell her I told you that.) Holly Cross McCormack is another local songbird that has her finger in many pies around Chattanooga. Currently Holly is also organizing the benefit show “Tunes for Tonya” on December 13 at Rhythm & Brews for a fellow Big River veteran stricken with Stage 4 cancer. With her Ani DiFrancostyle melodies, she gives reason to stay true to your natural

“Chris Sorenson and his band Even Song Rising are running a new venue, The Camp House, located on the Southside, and have already welcomed many of our local talents inside.”

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

talents and love of music. Dana Rogers is definitely our veteran in this mix. Dana was encouraged to pursue music at a young age, and now at 33 years young is still picking away at her own style of Americana, jazz, and blues. She is collaborating with a two-time Grammy nominee and has received her first endorsement deal while also working on her first album in five years. Each lady has opened at Nightfall, played the Chattanooga Market and spread their inspiration to various venues around town—but this will be the first time they come together for one show. You can download a free digital sampler of each of the girls by visiting the Manifest Facebook page. Proceeds each month will be donated to a different local organization, with this month highlighting the Partnership’s Family Violence Center. When you are born and raised in Chattanooga, you may dream of traveling to the Big City or chasing those California dreams, but more and more Chattanooga is becoming a destination city. As one of the Big City dreamers, I sometimes wonder if I have tricked myself into thoughts of staying in the Valley and making home my career, but venues such as The Camp House and its new NYC-transplant family make me pinch myself and realize it may not be a conspiracy, but a truthful revelation.

New Music Reviews K.Flay K.Flay (kflay.com)

“The proceeds from the set go to three worthy charities, and it comes in a handsome fliptop package with custommade poker chips.”

By Ernie Paik & Janis Hashe

The verbal onslaught of “No Duh,” the opening track of San Francisco hip-hop artist K.Flay’s self-titled EP, is striking by being a bravado-infused torrent of somewhat ridiculous metaphors and references—an odd combination of posturing and self-aware, self-mocking hipster-dom. With a nimble tongue, K.Flay furiously dashes through mentions of graphing calculators, Flintstones vitamins, retainer molds, and gefilte fish and even comments on her own rapping ability with feminine hygiene imagery. Who does she think she is? K.Flay, a.k.a. Kristine Flaherty, is a Stanford graduate who took influence from forthright women in music, such as Liz Phair, and the peculiar breeds of off-center hip-hop musicians. Her album from last year, MASHed Potatoes, presented popular songs sliced-and-diced, upon which K.Flay would rap, twisting each song’s title into something new. This formula continued this year with “2 Weak,” reworking Grizzly Bear’s “Two Weeks” into her own concoction, and her latest is a 5-song EP, available as a digital download. With her words being the center of attention, K.Flay’s arrangements aren’t overstated, featuring a few key elements— the aforementioned “No Duh” uses a piercing drumbeat, descending piano chords, and a “la” vocal sample played back as a classical motif. For “Messin with My Head,” she leans away from hip-hop a little,

World Christmas Party Various Artists (Putamayo) I have a pretty good collection of Christmas music to play at my annual holiday dropin party (my favorite being a collection of tunes I bought on the Big Island during a Hawaiian Christmas junket), but there’s a new addition this year that’ll be getting a lot of playtime: Putamayo’s World Christmas Party.

singing her kiss-off anthem in the role of a torn-up lover, with pop-rock synthetics and a ’90s guitar chug. “Acetaminophen” goes into more dance-oriented, electro territory with weirdo, pitch-shifted vocals, but unfortunately it comes off as being more annoying than compelling. K.Flay clearly has a way with words and can convey her songs’ attitudes appropriately—from hotshot bratty to vulnerable; the EP could stand to have a few more stronger hooks, like the memorable ones in “2 Weak,” but K.Flay’s snappy, oddball rhymes and agile rapping— her most notable strengths—mark its high points. — Ernie Paik

Putamayo fans out there will know that this release is the fifth in a series, the previous collections being A Family Christmas, A Jazz & Blues Christmas, New Orleans Christmas and Christmas Around the World. All are good, but the current one is my top pick for sheer multiple listens. Tracks recorded exclusively for this album include Cape Verdean singer Maria de Barros’s Creole version of “Deck the Halls” and Cuban singer/songwriter Jose Conde’s “Winter Wonderland”—the last truly crosscultural, because of its Brazilian sound, snow being something new to the beaches of Rio. Cuba crops up again, this time paired with Venezuela, on the swingin’ “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” by saxophone genius Ed Calle and trumpet legend Arturo Sandoval. This track definitely gives the Bruce Springsteen version a run for its reindeer

money. If one version of this song is not enough for you, sample it again with New Zealand’s H.K. Crew featuring KIINA, who do it Maori-style. More Latin jazz is offered with Poncho Sanchez’s take on “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas”—but my absolute favorite on this collection is the Heritage Hall Jazz Band’s Mexican-flavored “Barra de Navidad Blues.” This one will get many, many plays at the party. Second favorite comes from, no surprise, a Hawaiian duo, Keahiwai, because there is not enough ukulele playing in the world, especially on songs like “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree.” I’m also loving “The Christmas Song” ska-style by Brave Combo. In sum, folks, pick this up, play it at your party, and banish the Vienna Boys Choir for another year. — Janis Hashe

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Music Calendar Thursday Spotlight

Holy Ghost Tent Revival Dirty jazz, roots, big band, rock—HGTR has it all. $7 9:30 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.com

Thursday Jimmy Harris 6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. The Chariot, Cancer Bats, Stray From The Path, Amity, Tir Asleen 6:30 p.m. The Warehouse, 5716 Ringgold Rd. www.myspace.com/warehousetn Open Mic 8 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081. www.thecamphouse.com Nathan Farrow 9 p.m. The Lounge at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. Mike Hammontree 9 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com Jonathan Wimpee 9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn). facebook.com/theofficechatt Video DJ Nick 9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. www.budssportsbar.com

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Friday Spotlight

Holy Ghost Tent Revival 9:30 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.com SOULEDOUT! Classic and Modern Soul with DJ K7 10 p.m. The Social, 1110 Market St., Ste. 101. can can 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. Find them on Facebook.

Friday Johnny Cash Tribute Band 5 p.m. Chattanooga Choo Choo Victorian Lounge, 1400 Market St. (423) 266-5000. Ben Friberg Trio 6 p.m. Table 2, 232 E. 11th St. (423) 756-8253. www.table2restaurant.com Jimmy Harris 6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com The Gist, Rough Work 7:30 p.m. Barking Legs, 1322 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347. www.barkinglegs.org Richard Giliwetz 8 p.m. Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse, 105 McBrien Rd. (423) 892-4960. www.christunity.org The Pool 8 p.m. Sugar’s Ribs Downtown, 507 Broad St. (423) 508-8956. www.sugarsribs.com KudZu ReVue 8 p.m. Giggles Grill, 3224 Brainerd Rd., (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com

Hegarty & Deyoung 8 p.m. Southside Saloon & Bistro, 1301 Chestnut St. (423) 757-4730. southsidesaloonandbistro.com Sisters-in-Arms: Amber Fultz, Holly Cross McCormack, Dana Rogers 8:30 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081. www.thecamphouse.com Dave Walters Trio 8:30 p.m. The Foundry, 1201 South Broad St. (423) 756-3400. www.chattanooganhotel.com Stevie Monce 9 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919. www.myspace.com/jimstriker Meghan Howard 9 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com Devine Jazz 9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn). facebook.com/theofficechatt Butch Ross Christmas Spectacular 9 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (433) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com DJ and Dancing 9 p.m. Spectators, 7804 E. Brainerd Rd. (423) 648-6679. DJ and Dancing 9 p.m. The Lounge at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. Monotonix, The Coathangers, Ghetto Bord, Fast Boys 9 p.m. Discoteca, 304 E. Main St. (423) 386-3066. Find them on Facebook.

Christobel and the Jons, Cutthroat Shamrock Christmas Special Get in the spirit with one of our faves, Christobel, the Jons, and friends. $7 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. Find them on Facebook. The Matt Stephens Project 10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.com Blake Morrison 10 p.m. Ziggy’s Hideaway, 607 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 756-4786. myspace.com/ziggyshideaway Crossfire Band 10 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. www.budssportsbar.com Christabel and the Jons, Cutthroat Shamrock (Christmas Party) 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. Find them on Facebook.

Saturday Benefit Concert: Strung Like A Horse, Tiffany Taylor, Foam Party, Mon Voyage Neon, ToneHarm, An Epic No Less 2 p.m. Outdoor Chattanooga, 200 River St. (423) 643-6888. www.outdoorchattanooga.com Johnny Cash Tribute Band 5 p.m. Chattanooga Choo Choo Victorian Lounge, 1400 Market St. (423) 266-5000.

Music Calendar

Send your calendar events to us at calendar@chattanoogapulse.com

Saturday Spotlight

T-Model Ford, Bill Abel, Mark “Porkchop” Holder All kinds of blues from the legendary T-Model Ford. $10 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. Find them on Facebook. Jimmy Harris 6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. Pickin’ For A Cause: Mountain Cove 7 p.m. Mountain Opry Auditorium, 2501 Fairmount Pike. (423) 886-3252. Stacey Earle and Mark Sturat 8 p.m. Charles & Myrtle’s Coffeehouse, 105 McBrien Rd. (423) 892-4960. www.christunity.org The Georgia Crackers 8 p.m. Barking Legs, 1322 Dodds Avenue. (423) 624-5347. www.barkinglegs.org The Pool 8 p.m. Sugar’s Ribs Downtown, 507 Broad St. (423) 508-8956. www.sugarsribs.com Muddy Mule 8 p.m. Southside Saloon & Bistro, 1301 Chestnut St. (423) 757-4730. southsidesaloonandbistro.com Dave Walters Trio 8:30 p.m. The Foundry, 1201 South Broad St. (423) 756-3400. www.chattanooganhotel.com

Sunday Spotlight

Paleface 9 p.m. Discoteca, 304 E. Main St. (423) 386-3066. Find them on Facebook. Tommy Davis 9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn). facebook.com/theofficechatt Critty Upchurch 9 p.m. Raw, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919. www.myspace.com/jimstriker DJ and Dancing 9 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. DJ and Dancing 9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.com Dr. Lancaster 9 p.m. Ziggy’s Hideaway, 607 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 756-4786. myspace.com/ziggyshideaway DJ and Dancing 9 p.m. The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. The Floating Men with Soul Crush 9:30 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.com T-Model Ford, Billy Abel, Mark “Porkchop” Holder 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. Find them on Facebook.

Sunday Open Mic w/Jeff Daniels 4 p.m. Ms. Debbie’s Nightlife Lounge 4762 Highway 58, (423) 485-0966. myspace.com/debbieslounge

Irish Music Sessions 6 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com DJ and Dancing 9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.com

Irish Sessions Music

Monday

Free. 6:30 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com

Old Tyme Players 6 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (433) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Big Band Night 8 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055.

Tuesday Ben Friberg Trio 6:30 p.m. Table 2, 232 E. 11th St. (423) 756-8253. www.table2restaurant.com Lightning Billy Hopkins 8 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (433) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Open Mic with Mike McDade 9 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com Tim and Reece 9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777.

Wednesday Jimmy Harris 6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055.

Sure and it’s time for a little holiday cheer and music from the Auld Country. Garb your fiddle and grab your bow and get ready to play in the season.

Ben Friberg Trio 7 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (433) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Sister Hazel with special guest Ingram Hill 8 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.com DJ Spins – Karaoke Contest 9 p.m. Bart’s Lakeshore, 5600 Lakeshore Dr. (423) 870-0777. www.bartslakeshore.com Channing Wilson 9 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. www.budssportsbar.com Old Number 7 9 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pike. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com Johnston Brown 9 p.m. The Lounge at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com Open Mic with Mark Holder 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. Find them on Facebook.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Arts & Entertainment

A Day For McKay By Reginald Owens

veryone has a movie that they fell in love with at some time but haven’t been able to find any trace of it since. There’s always that one book that took your imagination farther than it’s ever been when you were 12 years old—but it seems to be out of print, missing from every bookstore. What about that vinyl record your dad used to play every Sunday morning? Many of these gems have been dismissed and dropped out of bookstores, movie and music retailers over the decades; yet, for the past 20 years these personal treasures have found a home in Chattanooga at McKay Books, CDs, Movies and More. To celebrate its 20th anniversary, McKay Books will be hosting Customer Appreciation Day this year on December 11 at 1 p.m. Offering cotton candy, drinks, and food catered by the gourmet hot dog eatery Good Dog, McKay plans to show its Chattanooga customers how much they are appreciated. “We really want to reach out to our community,” says Celeste Whitmire, media store manager for McKay Books. There will even be a friendly competitive game of trivia on McKay history and products for which the winners get free store credit. They don’t want to stump anyone, though. “There will be questions like, ‘How many Steven Segal movies are there?’” says Whitmire. McKay Books has come a long way to be able to show such gratitude to its continuously growing, devoted customer

base. Beginning its trade business in North Carolina around 1978, the unorthodox bookstore arrived in Chattanooga in 1990. It wasn’t until three years later that McKay first began trading compact discs. Since then, they’ve changed locations twice after outgrowing their original spaces and advancing in technology, adding mountains of books, tape cassettes, vinyl records, CDs, DVDs, game systems and video games to the collection. “I remember when there was just one box of DVDs,” Whitmire says. “Now we have over 75,000 movies. and most of them are DVDs.” It’s hard to imagine how an establishment that started simply as a “free-enterprise library” of books could grow to become such an essential provider of all media. “We’re going to be what you want us to be,” says Dan Bockert, nonfiction director. “McKay continued the idea that the store would be a reflection of the community that the store was in. So the growth and success has come because we never dictated what the store would become. It was a representation of the interests and reading habits of the community. It’s like a mirror held up to that particular community.” That mirror shows the reflection of a thriving, literature-loving community holding McKay Books as a valued tradition here in Chattanooga. A reflection of the community is also shown within McKay’s employees. People from every part of Chattanooga and as far away as Cleveland all come together under one roof to get the job done, sorting out thousands of books and CDs every day. Though McKay is known for a wide range of employees of alternative views and lifestyles, their solidarity and unity is nothing less than uncanny. “What’s interesting is that such

“The growth and success has come because we never dictated what the store would become. It was a representation of the interests and reading habits of the community.”

a wildly diverse group of people can all come together and work in one spot and can all have tremendous teamwork in the sense of family,” says Bockert. What draws so many different types of people to McKay Books? There’s a certain magnetism about it that pulls you in, since every trip to the bookstore delivers a reward of treasures that seem like they were put there specifically for you. “Part of the McKay mystique is that it’s become a habit. Some customers we see several times a week,” says Bockert. And what keeps people coming back? Maybe it’s the fact that you can never accumulate enough of the wealth that is offered in every aisle, on every shelf. Or the easy process of trading in something that is old to you for credit to buy something that’s new to you. Some fall deeply in love with the “Free Bin”, a bin of literally free books that McKay set aside to open up space in its inventory. “Everyone gets to find something of their own,” says Bockert. “There’s something magical about that.”

McKay Customer Appreciation Day 1 - 5 p.m. Saturday, December 11 McKay Books, 7734 Lee Highway (423) 892-0067. www.mckaybooks.com

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

A&E Calendar Highlights Friday

Thursday

Library Holiday Book Sale

Find great book gifts and stocking stuffers. 10 a.m. - 6 p.m. Main Library Auditorium, 1001 Broad St. (423) 757-5310. lib.chattanooga.gov

Send your calendar events to us at calendar@chattanoogapulse.com

Rock City’s Enchanted Garden of Lights 6 p.m. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mountain, GA. Scenic City Women’s Network December Luncheon Noon. First Presbyterian Church, 554 McCallie Ave. (423) 698-6262. Hands on Hunter: Unique Wrap 6 p.m. Hunter Museum of Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944. www.huntermuseum.org “PIO (Pass It On)” Opening Preview 6 – 8 p.m. Tanner Hill Gallery, 3069 Broad St. # 3. (423) 280-7182. www.tannerhillgallery.com Mystery of the TV Talk Show 7 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839. Hunter Mash Up 7:30 p.m. Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944. www.huntermuseum.org Matt Mitchell 8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com

Times Square Angel

Charles Busch’s camp classic parodies ’40s Hollywood Christmas movies. $18 8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, Circle Stage, 400 River St. (423) 267-8634. www.theatrecentre.com

Saturday

Holiday Handmade in St. Elmo

Local artists and craftsmen offer unique items; coincides with St. Elmo Trolley Tour of Lights. 10 a.m. – 5 p.m. Vaughan Greene Studio, 4714 Florida Ave. (423) 309-0105

Rock City’s Enchanted Garden of Lights 6 p.m. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mountain, GA. Chattanooga-Hamilton County Library Holiday Book Sale 10 a.m. Chattanooga-Hamilton County Bicentennial Library, 1001 Broad St. (423) 757-5310. Chattanooga Market: Holiday Market Too 10 a.m. Warehouse Row, 1110 Market St. www.chattanoogamarket.com “PIO (Pass It On)” 10 a.m. Tanner Hill Gallery, 3069 Broad St. # 3. (423) 280-7182. Holiday Lights at the Zoo 5:30 p.m. Chattanooga Zoo, 1254 E 3rd St. (423) 697-1322. The Big-Little Holiday Party 6:30 p.m. The Chattanoogan Hotel, 1201 Broad St. (423) 424-3726. Happy Hollandaise 6:30 p.m. Oak Street Playhouse, 419 McCallie Ave. (423) 756-2428. Rent 7 p.m. Memorial Auditorium, 399 McCallie Ave. (423) 757-5156. www.chattanooga.gov

Silent Christmas 7:30 p.m. Ensemble Theatre of Chattanooga, 1918 Union Ave. (423) 987-5141. Honk 7:30 p.m. Tennessee Valley Theatre, 184 West Jackson Ave. (423) 365-7529. The Nutcracker Christmas Carol 7:30 p.m. Chattanooga State Humanities Theatre, 4501 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 697-3246. The Best Christmas Pageant Ever 7:30 p.m. The Gem Theatre, 700 Tennessee Ave., Etowah, TN. (423) 263-3270. www.gemplayers.com The Nutcracker 7:30 p.m. The Colonnade Center, 264 Catoosa Circle, Ringgold, GA. (706) 935-9000. Matt Mitchell 7:30, 10 p.m. The Comedy Catch & Giggles Grille, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. 2nd Annual Fringe Benefit Bellydance Holiday Hafla 8 p.m. Alicia’s Dance Cheer and Tumbling, 5706 Highway 153

Sunday Rock City’s Enchanted Garden of Lights 6 p.m. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mountain, GA. Chattanooga-Hamilton County Library Holiday Book Sale 10 a.m. Chattanooga-Hamilton County Bicentennial Library, 1001 Broad St. (423) 757-5310. Chattanooga Market: Holiday Market Too 10 a.m. Warehouse Row, 1110 Market St. www.chattanoogamarket.com “PIO (Pass It On)” 10 a.m. Tanner Hill Gallery, 3069 Broad St. # 3. (423) 280-7182. Georgia Winery Holiday Open House 10 a.m. The Georgia Winery, 6469 Battlefield Pkwy., Ringgold, GA. (706) 937-WINE. The Nutcracker 10 a.m. The Colonnade Center, 264 Catoosa Circle, Ringgold, GA. (706) 935-9000. www.colonnadecenter.org Mosaic Market 11 a.m. 412 Market St. (corner of 4th/Market). (423) 624-3915

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Silent Christmas 2 p.m. Ensemble Theatre of Chattanooga, 1918 Union Ave. (423) 987-5141. The Nutcracker 2 p.m. The Colonnade Center, 264 Catoosa Circle, Ringgold, GA. (706) 935-9000. “A Baroque Christmas” 4 p.m. Collegedale Church of Seventh-Day Adventists, 4829 College Dr. E., Collegedale, TN. (423) 236-2880. Shuptrine’s Open House 5 p.m. Shuptrine’s Fine Art & Framing, 2646 Broad St. (423) 266-4453. Holiday Lights at the Zoo 5:30 p.m. Chattanooga Zoo, 1254 E 3rd St. (423) 697-1322. www.chattzoo.org Madrigal Dinners 6:30 p.m. Covenant College, 14049 Scenic Hwy. (706) 419-2800. www.covenant.edu/tickets Happy Hollandaise 6:30 p.m. Oak Street Playhouse, 419 McCallie Ave. (423) 756-2428. www.oakstreetplayhouse.com

The Nutcracker

Chattanooga Ballet presents its version of the holiday classic. $15 - $29 2 p.m. Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad St. (423) 265-0617. www.chattanoogaballet.net

Rock City’s Enchanted Garden of Lights 6 p.m. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mountain, GA. “PIO (Pass It On)” 10 a.m. Tanner Hill Gallery, 3069 Broad St. # 3. (423) 280-7182. Honk 2 p.m. Tennessee Valley Theatre, 184 West Jackson Ave. (423) 365-7529. Gingerbread Workshops 2 p.m. Creative Discovery Museum, 321 Chestnut St. (423) 648-6043. The Nutcracker Christmas Carol 2:30 p.m. Chattanooga State Humanities Theatre, 4501 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 697-3246. Silent Christmas 3 p.m. Ensemble Theatre of Chattanooga, 1918 Union Ave. (423) 987-5141. Black Nativity 4 p.m. Chauncey Goode Auditorium, 1815 Union Ave. (423) 242-5156. Happy Hollandaise 6:30 p.m. Oak Street Playhouse, 419 McCallie Ave. (423) 756-2428. www.oakstreetplayhouse.com

A&E Calendar Highlights Monday Rock City’s Enchanted Garden of Lights 6 p.m. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mountain, GA. www.seerockcity.com Speak Easy: Spoken Word and Poetry 8 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. www.facebook.com/theofficehcatt Deck the Falls Ruby Falls, 1720 South Scenic Hwy. (423) 821-2544. www.rubyfalls.com Member’s Choice Photographic Art Exhibit The Gallery at Blackwell, 71 Eastgate Loop. (423) 344-5643. “Eternal” Exum Gallery, 305 W. 7th St. (423) 593-4265. “Heirloom” Shuptrine Fine Art Group, 2646 Broad St. (423) 266-4453. www.shuptrinefineartgroup.com “le deluge, après mao: China’s Surging Creative Tide” Cress Gallery of Art, Corner of Vine and Palmetto St. (423) 425-4600.

Tuesday Rock City’s Enchanted Garden of Lights 6 p.m. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mountain, GA. www.seerockcity.com Senior Neighbors Orchestra Christmas Concert 11 a.m. White Oak Baptist Church, 310 Memorial Dr. (423) 755-6100. www.alexianbrothers.net Chattanooga Writers Guild Annual Christmas Party 6:30 p.m. North River Civic Center, 1009 Executive Dr. Hixson, TN. www.chattanoogawritersguild.com “Christmas on the Mountain: Walking in a Winter Wonderland” 7 p.m. Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad St. (423) 757-5050. www.chattanooga.gov Rejoice! Choral Arts 7:30 p.m. First-Centenary United Methodist Church, 419 McCallie Ave. www.choralartsofchattanooga.org “Happy Holidays” Houston Museum of Decorative Arts, 201 High St. (423) 267-7176.

Wednesday Rock City’s Enchanted Garden of Lights 6 p.m. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mountain, GA. www.seerockcity.com Main Street Farmers Market 4 p.m. Main St. at Williams St. www.mainstfarmersmarket.com Dinner with Santa 5 p.m. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mountain, GA. www.seerockcity.com A Very Gay Christmas 8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. “Beyond Baseball: The Life of Roberto Clemente” 10 a.m. Bessie Smith Cultural Center, 200 E. Martin Luther King Blvd. (423) 266-8658. “Helping Hands & Winter Wonders” Creative Discovery Museum, 321 Chestnut St. (423) 648-6043. “a Pale; place into parts” by Glenn Herbert Davis 10 a.m. Sewanee University Art Gallery, 68 Georgia Ave.

Editor’s Pick: Featured Event Of The Week

Choral Arts Chattanooga: “Rejoice with Choral Arts”

Choral Arts celebrates the final event in its 25th anniversary season with a bill featuring “Rejoice, Emmanuel Shall Come” and a special appearance by the King’s Quire. $15 7:30 p.m. Tuesday, December 14 First-Centenary Methodist Church, 419 McCallie Ave. (423) 877-7050. www.choralartsofchattanooga.org

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Life in the Noog

By Chuck Crowder

O Christmas Tree T

“Every major local thoroughfare is dotted with lots containing trees of all shapes, sizes and price ranges. The bigger and better the tree, the higher the cost.” Chuck Crowder is a local writer and general man about town. His opinions are just that. Everything expressed is loosely based on fact, and crap he hears people talking about. Take what you just read with a grain of salt, but pepper it in your thoughts. And be sure to check out his popular website at www.thenoog.com

is the season. The month of holidays in which we chop down perfectly good trees, adorn them with tinsel and ridiculous glass balls and let them die a quiet death inside our living rooms all in the name of Christmas. It’s the most wonderful time of the year.

As arborists cringe at the thought, nothing lights up children’s eyes (and the den) like a good old-fashioned Christmas tree. It’s a tradition that was probably created by Ben Franklin, as all things “American” likely were when attribution is in doubt. Regardless, it’s the first thing on our minds to do when the last of the Thanksgiving turkey sandwiches have been devoured. There are, of course, a few different tree options. The purists feel that a real tree is the only way to go. Every major local thoroughfare is dotted with lots containing trees of all shapes, sizes and price ranges. The bigger and better the tree, the higher the cost. And it’s difficult to talk the family into a six-footer with a brown spot that can be turned towards the corner when there’s a perfect nine-footer with the greenest of full branches just three feet away —and (just!) $35 more expensive. I’m always skeptical of the slackers working these lots who (because they were lucky enough to have a buddy get them the gig) all of a sudden become “experts” on the type, quality and perceived life expectancy of a tree that was chopped down sometime “whenever” and is sitting in a pool of ice-

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

cold water. Shamelessly sporting remnants of green spray paint on their hands and clothes, they always seem to play up to your wife or girlfriend because they know she has the final say in which one will end up tied down to the top of the minivan. If you’re truly “green-minded,” you can choose a real tree with the root ball still attached. Taken care of properly, these trees may be replanted in the back yard after New Year’s. On my daughter’s first Christmas (three months after she was born) we purchased one of these trees thinking that we could replant it and watch it grow as she does for years to come. Now that she’s 15 years old, the tree has grown to immense proportions, totally taking over her mom’s front yard, and could now provide enough firewood for most of Red Bank if needed. A good investment at $40 back in 1995, even if you can’t see who’s coming up the driveway. Lately I’ve heard that if you don’t want to drag a root-bound live tree into the house, the one-time investment of an artificial tree is the greenest option. Growing up in the ’70s, we had a white artificial tree with blue lights and silver ornaments. Back then, artificial tree manufacturers didn’t even consult a photograph of a real tree when designing their gaping arrangements of twisted wire branches sprouting quarte-inch tinsel “needles.” You could spot a fake a mile away. But there was a sense of tasteless pride in every family that chose this perceivably easier option. These days, however, there are plenty of artificial tree options—many of which look and feel like the real thing. Giant spruces,

firs and pines with closely arranged, full branches that are perfectly symmetrical from tip to trunk. Some are even pre-lit, which is like buying a TV with a DVD player built in—as soon as one component fails it’s never the same. One family I know just discovered that one of the million once twinkling lights of their pre-lit tree had blown, rendering the whole string useless. Now they’re back to stringing lights again, hoping the kids don’t ask why the others aren’t “sparkly” any more. The daunting task of discovering the root cause of the problem by testing each bulb is likely the reason why light strands are so cheap these days. Out of convenience and my own childhood memories of Christmas (but mainly convenience), I’ve chosen to go artificial and purchased a Charlie Brownsize white tree with—you guessed it—blue lights and silver decorations. My daughter seemed to like the change of pace from the real tree her mom still decorates, and the cheesy looks of it tend to compliment my more modern decor. Whatever type of tree you choose, having one seems to really make Christmas, Christmas (unless you’re Jewish, of course). So gather ’round the family and friends and make the season jingle a little more with some hot chocolate, seasonal tunes and an evening of hanging cheap ornaments on a tree in your living room this year. And if it’s real, be sure and water it often. You don’t want to scrape fallen needles off the gifts Christmas morning, and you definitely don’t want Santa to appear in a bright red truck instead of his good old sleigh. Stay merry!

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Film Feature

Tangled Decent Disney Hair Apparent By John DeVore

y editor mentioned to me after my last review that some themes are timeless. Disney knows how to package those themes for a mass audience. They have the market cornered on traditional fairytales. Idyllic kingdoms, noble rulers, happy peasants, adventurous protagonists, naïve teenage love, and breathtaking, far-off lands are all represented by Disney’s most recent animated fairytale, Tangled.

Almost everyone has seen Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast, et al. For some reason, however, “Rapunzel” was too confusing a title for modernday Americans; the marketing geniuses at the most magical corporation on Earth felt they needed something snappier. If they had been in charge in 1989, we might have all gone to see Seashells! rather than The Little Mermaid. But despite the title, Disney has created an amusing little film, one that children will love and adults can tolerate. It isn’t classic Disney; I fear those days are over, replaced by the superior original storytellers at Pixar. But it is a throwback, one that is welcome and effective. There are definitely worse kids’ movies. The film starts the way any fairytale should: Once upon a time, there was a kingdom. The queen was with child, but sick. The entire the kingdom begins to seek a flower, grown from a drop of sunshine that, with the proper application of a song, can cure all ailments and restore youth and beauty indefinitely. The flower has been hidden by an old woman named Mother Gothel, who uses it selfishly. However, the villagers find the flower, taking it from Gothel’s hiding place, and cure the queen. She gives birth to a child, a beautiful girl born with long, golden hair.

Gothel, desiring her magic facelift, kidnaps the child and locks her in a tower, raising her as her own. The story begins the day before the child’s 18th birthday. Throw in a swashbuckling crown thief named Flynn Rider (voiced by Zachary Levi), and we have all the parts in place. Disney has written the book for taking a well-known fairytale and updating it for modern audiences. They do this with slapstick comedy, anthropomorphic animals, common slang, and musical numbers. In years past, their music has been top notch. Many Disney songs are indispensable parts of the American childhood, linking imagination and passive television watching together effortlessly. Over the years, we’ve heard powerful scores, saccharine sweet ballads, and genuinely incredible songs that have sometimes crossed the line from children’s entertainment to fine art. This is where Disney has always been strongest. However, the music in Tangled doesn’t quite reach even the most mediocre of traditional Disney songs. The opening song, sung by the talented Mandy Moore, is plagued by digitized backbeats in a decidedly pop arrangement. Mercifully, the music in the rest of the film doesn’t follow this pattern, but it still doesn’t measure up to what audiences are used to hearing in a Disney film. I am also wistful for a time before computer-generated animation. I want to see painstaking drawings that talented artists labored and agonized over. I want a stylistic, complicated artistic scheme applied to the entire film. I want things to look less smooth, more artful. I love the look of films like Sleeping Beauty and Cinderella. I would rather Disney set itself apart by retaining a distinct sense of style. The digital animation in Tangled is good. The landscapes in particular are beautifully rendered. I would suggest avoiding the 3D version so that you can get the full effect of the vibrant colors offered.

“Despite the title, Disney has created an amusing little film, one that children will love and adults can tolerate.”

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

The story is also strong. “Rapunzel” has lasted because it is quintessentially human. We understand isolation and fear. We have all at one time struggled with a need for independence in the face of self doubt. Disney does a fine job of tackling the themes of the story with humor, keeping it light for the children the film was made for. The cynic in me wants to argue about the wisdom of capital punishment for stealing in what appears to be such a happy kingdom; I wonder if the peasants celebrate the birthday of the missing princess out of fearful obligation enforced by an iron-fisted despot disguised as a wise, caring monarch. Sometimes being a critic makes movies less fun.

New In Theaters The Tourist

Frank Taylor travels to Venice to recover from a recent break-up, though he soon finds himself engaged by the beautiful and mysterious Elise—who happens to be an Interpol agent with a dangerous connection to a fugitive criminal. The first-ever pairing of two of the most beautiful actors on the planet, combined with the visually stunning settings of Venice (and not incidentally well accented by another solid performance by the always-dependable Paul Bettany) has box-office gold practically in its DNA. The only question is whether the pairing of Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie would have actual spark, when so many other seemingly “in the bank” pairings had almost no chemistry (the recent Tom Cruise/Cameron Diaz flop Knight & Day comes immediately to mind). Audiences can relax. The chemistry is not only there, but unlike other actors (such as the aforementioned Cruise and Diaz), Depp and Jolie also bring the A-game to the acting and script. While the plot in many ways seems little more than warmed-over Hitchcock, it’s elevated by the excellent cast and beautiful settings and may be one of those rare Oscar-buzz films that actually make a lot of money. Starring Johnny Depp, Angelina Jolie, Paul Bettany Directed by Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck

The Tempest

A power grab finds Prospera, the rightful Duchess of Milan, exiled to a remote island with her young daughter, Miranda. Asserting influence over the island, Prospera develops a new enemy: the slave Caliban, who looks to raise a rebellion against his foe. Yes, it’s another of Julie Taymor’s Shakespeare spectacles, which has been rather savaged on the festival circuit. But even with all the overwrought direction Taymor brings to the film, when one combines Helen Mirren, Djimon Hounsou and Alfred Molina (who plays the shipwrecked Stephano) in one of the Bard’s best stories, it’s very easy to overlook the many critical complaints and just let yourself go in the majesty of all that is Taymor, bombastic as always. Starring Helen Mirren, Felicity Jones, Djimon Hounsou Directed by Julie Taymor

The Chronicles of Narnia: The Voyage of the Dawn Treader

Lucy and Edmund Pevensie return to Narnia with their cousin Eustace, where they meet Prince Caspian for a trip across the sea aboard the royal ship The Dawn Treader. Along the way they encounter dragons, dwarves, merfolk, and a band of lost warriors before reaching the edge of the world. A new director (Michael Apted), a new studio (Fox), and a resurrection of a beloved children’s series that even Disney seemingly could not keep going sets the bar fairly high for success of the latest chapter in C.S. Lewis’ “Narnia” series. Working in its favor is that The Voyage of the Dawn Treader is considered by most “Narnia” fans as the best, and easily most exciting, of the seven books. What remains to be seen is how audiences will respond to the overt Christian allegory that at times hampered the first two films, and whether they will accept it as part of the storytelling that has delighted generations of children across the world. Starring Ben Barnes, Skandar Keynes, Georgie Henley Directed by Michael Apted

The Company Men

A drama centered on a year in the lives of three businessmen who look to what’s next in their lives after being laid off by their company. Television guru John Wells, the man behind ER and The West Wing, returns to film with a well-crafted take on economic hardship. Since debuting at the Sundance Film Festival, The Company Men has been compared with last year’s well-received Up In The Air, with most critics lauding the solidly alternative take to Hollywood’s usual offerings on the subject of the effects of a bad economy. The film is already being positioned for a serious run at all the big awards, and even more amazingly, no one seems to be focusing on whether or not having Ben Affleck in the film would hamper its chances. Affleck really has turned his career around, moving from the butt of many Hollywood jokes to now being considered a serious (and effective) actor and filmmaker. Starring Ben Affleck, Chris Cooper, Tommy Lee Jones Directed by John Wells www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Riley's Spirits Within Eight Great Spirited Gifts By Joshua Hurley

Now that December is here, you’re probably racking your brain over gift ideas. Is all this thought and stress making it difficult for you to get into the holiday spirit? Well, relax! Riley’s has it covered with eight Great Buys that offer something for every adult on your Christmas list. Spirits make perfect gifts—and they never seem to be returned! Remember, “Great Buys” is where Riley’s Wine and Spirits on Hixson Pike in Hixson picks something special from the area’s numberone wine and spirits selection and shares it with the readership of The Pulse. So here come eight great gift ideas: 1. Maker’s Mark Bourbon (750mL). Comes boxed with a Christmas ornament. This is the perfect gift for your boss or husband. Maker’s Mark Bourbon from Kentucky is considered one of the best. It is made with water from a limestone spring fed by a 10-acre lake on the property and carefully selected yellow corn, wheat and barley. All these combine to give Maker’s Mark Bourbon its unique mellow flavor. Includes a ball Christmas ornament to forever “mark” the occasion. $28.96 plus tax each. 2. Maker’s Mark Triple Set with Red, White and Blue Wax Limited Edition Box (375mL). This is something for the patriot on your gift list. This set combines Maker’s Mark premium bourbon whiskey quality with a onetime release of patriotic red, white and blue wax tops. It is truly a unique gift. $30.66 plus tax each. 3. Jim Beam Black Label 86 Proof with two glasses. Since its founding in 1795, Jim Beam has become the world’s number-one selling bourbon, family owned and operated for seven generations. Jim Beam Black Label 86 Proof is aged for eight years and combines The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

the smoothness of Jim Beam with the extra proof of, say, a Maker’s Mark. Includes two highball glasses in the boxed set. $18.63 plus tax each. 4. Southern Comfort 70 Proof with T-shirt (boxed). Since 1874, Southern Comfort fruit-andspice flavored bourbon whiskey has been considered the taste of New Orleans. Included in this set are a 750mL bottle of Southern Comfort and one black, large T-shirt. $14.99 plus tax each. 5. Old Forester 100 Proof (375mL). Comes boxed with a glass and commemorates the 75th Anniversary of the repeal of Prohibition. The 18th Amendment is the only amendment ever to be repealed. Old Forester, the first bourbon to be sold with a label in 1870, was uninterrupted by Prohibition. Neat box! $16.48 plus tax each. 6. Jack Daniels Black (375mL). Comes boxed with glasses. This is the original old Number 7 and comes with two Jack Daniels shot glasses. $15.10 plus tax each. 7. Jack Daniels Gentlemen Jack Sour Mash Whiskey (750mL). Comes boxed with glasses from the Jack Daniel’s Lynchburg Distillery. This is the Super Premium version of Jack Daniels Black—twice charcoal filtered for a smoother taste. Perfect for ladies or gentlemen. $26.99 plus tax each. 8. Jack Daniel’s Single Barrel (750mL). Duck’s Unlimited Package (Limited). The best whiskey Jack Daniel’s has to offer. Bottled from barrels personally selected by the master distiller as the best, then aged further to enhance flavor and smoothness. Includes one 750mL Jack Daniels Single Barrel Bottle, Duck’s Unlimited Tin and two collectable glasses. $44.99 plus tax each.

Chattanooga Street Scenes

Photography by Josh Lang An unusual afternoon on Main Street.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Free Will Astrology SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): You’ve arrived at a delicate yet boisterous turning point when oneof-a-kind opportunities are budding. I’m going to give you seven phrases that I think capture the essence of this pregnant moment: 1. wise innocence; 2. primal elegance; 3. raw holiness; 4. electrifying poise; 5. curative teasing; 6. rigorous play; 7 volcanic tenderness. To maximize your ability to capitalize on the transformations that are available, I suggest you seek out and cultivate these seemingly paradoxical states of being. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): For years I’ve had recurring dreams of finding treasure amidst trash. I interpret this to mean that I should always be alert, in my waking life, for the possibility that I might come across beautiful or valuable stuff that’s mixed in with what has been discarded or forgotten. Recently I heard about a literal embodiment of this theme. A sewage treatment plant in Japan announced that it has been culling huge amounts of gold from the scum and slop -- so much so that their haul outstrips the yield at the country’s top gold mine. I urge you to make this your metaphor of the week, Capricorn. What riches might you be able to pluck out of the dirt and shadows? AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Should you store up your energy, postpone your gratification, and withhold your full intensity for a more opportune time? Hell, no! Should you await further data before making a definitive conclusion, fantasize dreamily about some more perfect future, and retreat into a self-protective cocoon? Double hell, no! And if thoughts like those have been poking up into your awareness, exorcise them immediately. It is high time for you to grab the best goodies, reveal the whole truth, and employ your ultimate schemes. You are primed to make a big play, call on all the help you’ve been promised, and transform the “what ifs” into “no doubts.” PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In Taio Cruz’s mega-hit pop song “Dynamite,” he describes how excited he is to go dancing at his favorite nightclub. “I throw my hands up in the air,” he exults. “I wanna celebrate and live my life . . . I’m wearin’ all my favorite brands.” In advising you about the best ways to ride the current cosmic rhythms, Pisces, I’ll use Cruz as both a role model and an anti-role model. You should be like him in the sense of being eager to throw your hands up in the air. Right now it’s your sacred duty to intensify your commitment to revelry and find every possible excuse to celebrate your life. On the other hand, it’s crucial that you don’t wear all your favorite brands. To get the full benefits from this time of festive release, you will need, as much as humanly possible, to declare your independence from corporate brainwashing and escape the intelligence-sapping mindset of consumerism. ARIES (March 21-April 19): In the coming weeks, life will beguile you with secrets and riddles but probably not reveal as much as you’d like. I think this is an opportunity, not a problem. In my opinion, your task isn’t to press for shiny clarity, but rather to revel in the luxuriant mysteries. Let them confer their blessings on you through the magic of teasing and tantalizing. And what is the nature of those blessings? To enlighten your irrational mind, stimulate your imagination, teach you patience, and nurture your connection with eternity. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Butterflies recall at least some of what they’ve learned during their time as caterpillars. The metamorphosis they go through is dramatic, turning their bodies into a soupy goo before remaking them into winged gliders. And yet they retain the gist of the lessons they mastered while in their earlier form. I see something comparable ahead for you in 2011, Taurus. It’s as if you will undergo a kind of reincarnation without having to endure the inconvenience of actually dying. Like a butterfly, the wisdom you’ve earned in your old self will accompany you into your new life. Are you ready? The process begins soon.

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

By Rob Brezsny

Truthrooster@gmail.com GEMINI (May 21-June 20): What nourishes you emotionally and spiritually, Gemini? I’m not talking about what entertains you or flatters you or takes your mind off your problems. I’m referring to the influences that make you stronger and the people who see you for who you really are and the situations that teach you life-long lessons. I mean the beauty that replenishes your psyche and the symbols that consistently restore your balance and the memories that keep feeding your ability to rise to each new challenge. Take inventory of these precious assets. And then make a special point of nurturing them back. CANCER (June 21-July 22): Two-thirds of American elementary-school teachers spend their own money to buy food for their poor students. Meanwhile, there’s a 50 percent chance that an American kid will, at some point in his or her young life, resort to using government aid in the form of food stamps. Those facts make me angry and motivate me to volunteer to distribute free food at the local food bank. I encourage you, my fellow Cancerian, to summon your own good reasons to get riled up in behalf of people who have less luck and goodness than you do. It’s always therapeutic to stretch your generosity and spread your wealth, but doing so will especially redound to your advantage in the coming weeks. Unselfish acts will bring profound selfish benefits. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): According to some sources, the ancient Greek philosopher Socrates practiced the art of sculpture as a young man. But he abandoned it early on, deciding that he wanted to “carve his soul rather than marble.” Can I interest you in turning your attention to that noble, gritty task, Leo? It would be a fine time to do some intensive soul-carving. Soul-scouring, too, would be both fun and wise, as well as soul-etching and soul-emblazoning and soulaccessorizing. I highly recommend that you enjoy a prolonged phase of renovating and replenishing your most precious work of art. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): In her haunting tune “One Blood,” Virgo singer Lila Downs confesses that “the deepest fear [is] my desire.” I personally know many Virgos who make a similar lament. How about you? Is there any way in which you are scared of the power of your longing? Do you ever find yourself reluctant to unleash the full force of your passion, worried that it could drive you out of control or lead you astray? If so, the coming weeks will be prime time to face down your misgivings. It’s time to liberate your desires, at least a little. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Here are your words of power: hybrid, amalgamation, composite, aggregate, medley, alloy, ensemble. Now here are your words of disempowerment: welter, mishmash, jumble, hodgepodge, patchwork. Strive to accentuate the first category and avoid the second. Your task is to create a pleasing, synergetic arrangement from a multiplicity of factors, even as you avoid throwing together a hash of diverse influences into an unholy mess. Be calculating and strategic, not rash and random, as you do your blending. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): On my Facebook page, I posted this excerpt from a Pablo Neruda love poem (translated by Stephen Tapscott): “Our love is like a well in the wilderness where time watches over the wandering lightning. Our sleep is a secret tunnel that leads to the scent of apples carried on the wind.” In response, a reader named John F. Gamboa said this: “I once found a well in the desert. There was a rope and a bucket. The bucket had a small hole in it. While pulling up the bucket of water, about half of it drained. But I suppose a decent bucket would have been stolen. So a bucket with a small hole was perfect; I got what I needed!” I’m here to tell you, Scorpio, that like Gamboa, a bucket with a small hole is probably what you need right now.

Across 1 Actress ___ Longoria Parker 4 “I agree with that” 8 Made baby noises 13 Headroom of ‘80s pop culture 14 Says without doubt 16 Painter Matisse 17 Hoth, in the “Star Wars” universe 19 Very beginning 20 Item in a famous Dali painting 22 Grandmaster’s game 25 The White Rabbit’s frantic response 26 “___, I tell ya what...” 27 Shorten (a book) 32 Johnson of “Plan 9 From Outer Space” 33 Pervade 35 Come up short 36 Anatomical canals 38 Account that could be abused 41 Pregnancy test, familiarly 44 Before too long 45 Catch a baseball

49 “Lost” actor Daniel ___ Kim 50 Review 53 Batman villain Poison ___ 54 Like many short plays 56 Noodles for poor college students 58 Plane used for short commuter flights, slangily 63 Shire in the “Rocky” movies 64 Sci-fi subgenre featuring Victorian Era technology 68 Mountain range stats 69 Wilkes-___, PA 70 Homer’s barkeep 71 Curvy letters 72 Leader 73 David Sedaris’s sister Down 1 Radiohead record label 2 Sucker, for short 3 Swung weapon 4 Solidarity co-founder Lech 5 Race track shape

–step by step, it'll all be gone.

6 Rock musical based on “La Boheme” 7 Three, in Trier 8 Noodle dish 9 Kidney-related 10 Local, as opposed to across borderlines 11 ___ Set (classic toy) 12 Dagwood Bumstead’s boss 15 Train stop: abbr. 18 UK leaders 21 Band booking 22 Network that canceled “Cold Case” 23 Tool that helps break ground 24 Radial keratotomy target 28 ___-Ray (disc format) 29 “Arrested Development” actress Portia de ___ 30 “___ Andy Warhol” 31 “Robinson Crusoe” author Daniel 34 Next-to-last Greek letter 37 Super Bowl scores,

for short 39 Crude 40 Palindromic Burmese leader 41 One of three for Angelina Jolie 42 How-to booklets 43 Subject of many doctor-related fears 46 Finnish rock band with a “heartagram” logo 47 Many a Monopoly sq. 48 OB/___ (baby doctor) 51 Hgwy. 52 Like some anatomy students 55 Take ___ (go down) 57 Dada artist Jean 59 Major Baroque composer’s monogram 60 Sundance Film Festival locale 61 Being nothing more than 62 Prefix for “sailing” 65 John and Samuel’s “Pulp Fiction” co-star 66 ___ de guerre 67 Chain dangler

Crossword created By Matt Jones. © 2010 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #0497.

Solution To Last Week’s Crossword

JONESIN’

“Getting Hotter”

Crossword solutions every week at www.chattanoogapulse.com www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse

Ask A Mexican

By Gustavo Arellano

Fly, Buzz and Mistranslate

“What’s a little ice on the wings, some twisted wires? Who cares if the Federal Aviation Administration downgraded AeroMexico to the status of Third World airlines?” Have a question? Ask the Mexican at themexican@askamexican.net, be his fan on Facebook, follow him on Twitter or ask him a video question at youtube.com/askamexicano!

Dear Mexican, Why can AeroMexico Airlines fly through any kind of weather conditions to get to and from the United States, but any kind of little ice sprinkle or heavy wind and domestic airlines in the U.S. cancel two days worth of flights? For two consecutive winters, I’ve had Chicago-to-Houston-to-Leon, Guanajuato on Continental Airlines, and Chicago-to-Dallasto-Leon on American Airlines canceled with a call I received while getting the suitcases packed! — No Siento Turbulencia Dear I Don’t Feel Turbulence, You know us Mexicans—throw caution to the wind. We live in this country illegally under the specter of deportation—and we make it. We live in Mexico under the specter of the narcos—and we make it. We live in the shadow of El Norte—and we make it. We lived through the tyranny of Cortés, the Spanish crown, Santa Anna, the Porfiriato, PRI, Calderón, Carlos Slim, and the popularity of MASECA—and we make it. Floundering economy on both sides of la frontera? Repeat after me, class: MEXICANS MAKE IT! So, what’s a little ice on the wings, some twisted wires? Who cares if the Federal Aviation Administration downgraded AeroMexico to the status of Third World airlines? We still make it. Man, Ma Joad had nothing on us Mexis—we’re the cabrones that live (and, if you read the full quote, you’ll know she was advocating Reconquista!).

The Pulse | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | December 9, 2010 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Dear Mexican, Who puts the intense pressure on all adolescent Mexican boys to either shave or buzz their cranium hair, regardless of the number of scars, large ears, or folds of ugly neck skin revealed? — Dirty White Boy Waiting for Godot Dear Gabacho, That suffocating menace known as “youth culture,” with an assist from “prison culture” but not the “Mexican cultural expectations” your “pendejo ass culture” is insinuating. Simply put: like any teen trends, shaved heads started with youngsters imitating their friends, who imitated their older brothers and cousins, who imitated their peers. The two great historical fashion trendsetters in Mexican-American youth culture, according to James Diego Vigil’s Barrio Gangs: Street Life and Identity in Southern California, has been prisons and the military, and both subcultures prefer a close-cropped hair style for their men for efficiency’s sake. But if you ever see a baby with a shaved head, it’s most likely a kiddie shorn by their wabby parents in the belief that a thicker head of hair would emerge, a Mexican fable as laughable as the belief by children that the wrapped Xbox caja under the Christmas tree actually contains a gaming console and not underwear and socks. Dear Mexican, An Anglo public servant would be embarrassed to death (or at least should be) if he posted a public sign with bad English grammar or spelling. So how come the same doesn’t

apply to Spanish in the Estados Unidos? In Las Vegas, the caution signs on the bus doors have three words—recargarse, pararse, empujar—misspelled as recargarce, pararce, enpuja. In the Lowe’s hardware section free cutting service, on a huge letrero is translated “Liberte los Servicios Cortante” which is hilarious gibberish, incomprehensible to a Mexican. You and I couldn’t make up something like that if we tried! Why is it that bad written English is a sign of ignorance or stupidity, but Spanish…? — El Viejo Profe Dear Old Professor, You really think it’s a fully bilingual Mexican doing those translations? It’s either a worker pulling something off the Internet, a pocho who doesn’t know any better, or… no, it’s a pinche pocho who doesn’t know any better but draws a nice salary by fooling clueless, monolingual gabachos into thinking he does. But Mexicans don’t care about mistranslations in trivial areas (unless they’re custodians of Cervantes, in which case they deserve to froth at the boca), and the pochos and their gabacho supervisors don’t know any better—so the mistranslations stay. Laugh, I say! We do! GOOD MEXICANS OF THE WEEK: DREAM Act students—DUH. And not just the Mexis, but all the DREAMers who are more American than John Wayne, George Washington, and Lady Gaga put together. Support the most digestible form of amnesty, cabrones, and to all my Dreamers out there: keep the faith.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | December 9, 2010 | Vol. 7, Issue 49 | The Pulse