The Pulse - Vol. 8, Issue 27

FREE • NEWS, VIEWS, MUSIC, FILM, ARTS AND ENTERTAINMENT JULY 7, 2011 • VOLUME 8, ISSUE 27 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

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The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

Nightfall 2011 - Friday Night!

Mia Borders

JULY

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2011

ontents C

VOLUME 8, ISSUE 27 • CHATTANOOGAPULSE.COM

Want to watch a video of this week's Nightfall headliner? Download the FREE "QR Reader" on your smartphone and scan this code.

“We have our music snobs and equal-opportunity genre hoppers. But when it is all said and done, there is no other feeling that beats hearing your song and learning new ones.”

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— Tara Morris-Viland on at look at the past, present and future of the local music scene.

“The additional dimension of aesthetic effect situates these works in a contemporary setting, suggesting how thoughts about art have developed.”

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— Arts writer Michael Crumb waxing poetic on a new gallery showing at 1800 Main.

“Knowing how much support Gucci Mane was getting from Mad Decent, it was obvious that picking Heroes & Villains as the opening act would be the perfect choice to combine a diverse crowd of party animals.”

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— Music writer Dave Castaneda on a rare performance from the hip-hop legend.

“The website features daily entries of wolf art drawn by strangers, collected by someone who mysteriously signs off his posts simply as ‘J’.”

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— Cole Rose on a most unusual website art project.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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NEWS Chattanooga’s Weekly Alternative President Jim Brewer, II Publisher Zachary Cooper Contributing Editor Janis Hashe News Editor / Layout Gary Poole Director of Sales Rhonda Rollins Advertising Sales Jaye Brewer, Rick Leavell, Michelle Pih Calendar Editors Bryanna Burns, Leanne Strickland Graphic Design Jennifer Grelier Photography / Videography Josh Lang Contributors Gustavo Arellano, Rob Brezsny Dave Castaneda, Chuck Crowder Michael Crumb, Janis Hashe Matt Jones, Louis Lee Kelly Lockhart, Tara Morris-Viland Ernie Paik, Rick Pimental-Habib Cole Rose, Alex Teach Editorial Cartoonist Rick Baldwin Editorial Interns Lauren Haynes, Crystal Kishimoto Contact Info: Phone (423) 265-9494 Fax (423) 266-2335 Email Inquiries info@chattanoogapulse.com Calendar Submissions calendar@chattanoogapulse.com The Pulse is published weekly and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publishers may take more than one copy per weekly issue. The Pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors.

The Pulse is published by

Brewer Media 1305 Carter Street Chattanooga, Tennessee 37402 Letters to the editor must include name, address and daytime phone number for verification. The Pulse reserves the right to edit letters for space and clarity.

Please keep letters within 300 words in length.

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Pulse Beats

“I am excited about the opportunity to play a role in this administration as we continue to move forward creating a better Hamilton County.”

“Move Over Law” Is Expanded in Tennessee The next time you see an electric utility vehicle working on the side of the road, slow down and give it room. The workers will appreciate your courtesy, and a new Tennessee law requires it.

Legislation signed by Gov. Bill Haslam on April 5 expands Tennessee’s Move Over law to include electric and other utility vehicles. Police, fire and highway construction vehicles were already covered before the law’s expansion. However, the Tennessee Electric Cooperative Association and its member cooperatives recognized the need to include electric and other utility vehicles.

Taking effect on July 1, the new law says that motorists approaching a utility vehicle with flashing lights are required to move over if safe to do so, creating an empty lane buffer. When changing lanes is not possible, motorists must reduce speed.

“Electric utility workers have a dangerous job,” says Mike Knotts, director of government affairs for the Tennessee Electric Cooperative Association, “and the expansion of the Move Over law makes their working environment safer.”

Roadway crashes are the leading cause of occupational fatalities in the United States. The Tennessee Department of Safety reports that more than 100 highway and street construction workers are killed each year as a result of vehicle crashes or equipment accidents on the job. Another 20,000 are injured.

Tommy Campbell, a lineman for Duck River Elec-

The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

—Newly appointed Hamilton County Chief of Staff Mike Compton, who had previously served as chief of staff to then-Chattanooga Mayor Bob Corker.

tric Membership Corporation in Decherd, knows all too well the dangers of working near traffic. Campbell was struck by a vehicle while retrieving a tool from a bin on the side of his truck. The impact threw him over the hood and windshield of the oncoming vehicle and into the air before landing in the street.

His injuries required major surgery.

“I knew my foot was severely injured,” says Campbell about the accident. “I worried I would not be able to climb poles anymore. My father was a lineman, and that is what I love doing.” Fortunately, Tommy resumed climbing poles one year after the accident.

“This is a great law for utility workers,” Campbell says. “We have to get the word out and make the public aware. Drivers must slow down when approaching utility vehicles.”

“We appreciate the Tennessee General Assembly and Gov. Haslam for protecting Tennessee’s utility workers, and we are especially grateful to Sen. Steve Southerland and Rep. Phillip Johnson for sponsoring the legislation on our behalf,” says Knotts.

The Tennessee law is the first-of-its-kind in the country. North Carolina’s Move Over law includes utility workers but only during emergency situations such as storm restoration. Tennessee’s law applies anytime utility vehicles are working with flashing lights.

Additional information on the Move Over expansion can be found at moveovertennessee.org.

News Briefs • Public Art Chattanooga is seeking qualifications from artists or artist teams for the commission and installation of a work of public art at the Bluff View Overlook. Up to five finalists will be selected to develop concept proposals for this project.

Each will be paid a $500 proposal fee. The project budget for the selected commission is $55,000. This is open to all professional artists and artist teams over the age of 18. Applications must be received by August 1, 2011. Complete details, site photos, and an application can be downloaded at www.publicartchattanooga.com/ about/callstoartists.htm • Are you surviving or thriving with diabetes? Stress getting the best of you? Learn how to choose healthy responses by join Partners & Peers for Diabetes Care in their interactive, experiential workshop series. Enjoy the fun and connection as you learn Advanced Diabetes Management Skills. The next workshop is Saturday, July 16 from 9:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. at the Brainerd Crossroads BX Center, 300 Brookfield Ave. $15 registration or $10 each when you come with a buddy. Workshop details at www.partnersandpeers.org or call (423) 505-0558.

NEWS

Opinion

Futbol Fanatics While most sports shows seem to almost completely ignore soccer unless the U.S. is in the World Cup, it was refreshing to see The Pulse give such great coverage to the fantastic Chattanooga Football Club and its loyal fans, of which I am one. The team plays with skill, passion and a great sense of fun. And best of all, the team, coaches and owners make it a point to interact with the fans at every opportunity. Chattanooga is blessed with a number of great sports teams—the CFC, the Lookouts, and of course the various Mocs teams—and we should all be thankful for them and support them all.

Bill Haskell Fireworks and the Law What is the point of having anti-fireworks laws in Chattanooga and Hamilton County when law enforcement does nothing to enforce it? Any law that is not enforced weakens the rest of the laws. One of my neighbors held a fireworks party on Sunday night that involved nearly as many fireworks as Riverbend has, expect he had a lot more drunken friends and barely supervised children running around. I was amazed

Send all letters to the editor and questions to

info@chattanoogapulse.com We reserve the right to edit letters for content and space. Please include your full name, city and contact information.

to not see an ambulance visit the house considering how unsafe everyone there was with their beloved explosives. In years past, I had called police to report such parties and was told they were too busy to respond to every single fireworks complaint. This year I didn’t even bother, but it does make me wonder why the laws even exist if they

aren’t going to be enforced.

Gene Coe Multicultural Chamber?

I heard last week that the Hamilton County Commission had voted to strip their financial support of the Multicultural Chamber of Commerce after learning the director makes over $100,000, has another very well-paid assistant and yet barely spends any money on their membership. To make matters worse, it’s 2011 and I find it insulting to all business owners, regardless of skin color, to have an organization who believes that white business owners would not treat all businesses equally. This is not the 1960’s anymore, and the time for special treatment needs to end.

Sabrina Farley Thanks Chattanooga!

The recent “Jack’s Chattanoggins” event at the Chattanooga Market was an amazing event that couldn’t have been executed without the wonderful support of friends and community. We were able to raise over $17,000 to help kids fighting cancer. Thank you, Chattanooga!

Dawn Skowronnek www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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NEWS

Politics & Crime A weekly roundup of the newsworthy, notable and often head-scratching stories gleaned from police reports from the Chattanooga Police Department, the Hamilton County Sheriff’s Office, the Bradley County Sheriff’s Department and the Dalton Police Department.

Here is one of the agenda items to be discussed at the Tuesday, July 12 meeting of the Chattanooga City Council.

VII. Resolutions: e) A resolution authorizing the Chief of Police to apply for and accept a grant from the Office of Community Oriented Policing Services (COPS) which is funded under the COPS Hiring Recovery Program in the amount of $4,363,491.00 which will be used to hire twenty-three (23) police officers and pay their salaries for three (3) years.

The City of Chattanooga will be required to fund these positions one (1) year beyond the expiration of the grant.

For those that complain about their tax money being “wasted”, here is an example of your federal taxes being used to benefit us right here at home. What the grant all boils down to is the opportunity for the Chattanooga Police Department to add 23 more officers for one-quarter of what it would cost otherwise. And considering that it is highly unlikely the city will release all 23 officers after the expiration of the four-year deal, it still gives the city a three-year break on salaries, a nice, long-term savings.

The Chattanooga City Council meets each Tuesday at 6 p.m. in the City Council Building at 1000 Lindsay St. For more information on the current agenda, and past minutes, visit www.Chattanooga.gov/City_Council

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• Why do burglars think scrap metals dealers are ignorant? In today’s economy, a lot of people are converting unused metal to cash at several of the local scrap metals dealers. But the owners of these operations are also vigilant about noticing when things do not appear to be on the upand-up. Such as when a man tries to sell several pieces of expensive jewelry. Bradley County deputies were able to use the info provided by the dealer to arrest a man and charge him with the recent burglary of a Mill Creek Trail residence. The man had assisted the homeowner with making minor repairs and had obviously used the time to case the home and returned later, stealing jewelry, several hundred dollars and two bottles of prescription medication.

The man remains in the Bradley County jail under $25,000 bond.

• When she says it’s over, just let it go.

Breaking up is always difficult, no matter the situation. But even so, that is not enough of an excuse to express your heartbreak by trying to run down your ex-girlfriend. Yet that is exactly what a 22-year-old Chattanooga man is accused of doing after breaking up with the object of his affection. The good news is that the woman was able to avoid being run over;

The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

the bad news is that he lost control of his car, plowed through a chain-link fence and into a house. Luckily no one in the home was injured and the house didn’t suffer major damage. The jilted ex did suffer some harm from the impact, but refused medical treatment and walked away from the hospital.

• The numbers are out from the Chattanooga Police Department on Riverbend 2011.

During the entire nine days of the festival there were 55 arrests for everything from public intoxication and indecent exposure to assaulting police and inciting a riot. An additional 32 people were asked to leave the premises during the festival. Most of the arrests were for DUI as festival-goers left the riverfront. The most active night for police was during the Bessie Smith Strut, where they made eleven arrests and asked two people to leave the area. Faith and Family night, on the other hand, saw no arrests and no ejections. And as of press time, there were no reports of any beer vendors selling alcohol to underage buyers, a problem that had plagued the festival in past years.

• Shoplifting is all too common, but sometimes a deputy is in the right place at the right time. A woman was seen trying

to leave a large Highway 153 retailer with nearly $300 worth of unpaid merchandise in her cart. When store officials attempted to stop her, she ran out the doors towards her car. Unfortunately for her, she also ran right in the direction of a Hamilton County sheriff’s deputy, who told her to stop.

Instead, the woman decided to try and put up a fight, which ended very quickly when the deputy took her to the ground and held her there until city officers arrived to take her into custody. The woman now faces charges of theft under $500 and resisting arrest.

• And on a final note… A North Concord Road homeowner called police and reported that someone had come into his backyard and stolen all the apples off of his apple tree. It’s so sad to see that Johnny Appleseed has turned to a life of crime.

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

OPINION

Shrink Rap

Finding Courage When It’s Most Needed N

otice how from time to time there are parts of ourselves that need “tune-ups?” I’m not referring to extra work on your core at the gym after a carnivorous weekend, or finally going in for a long-overdue haircut so you can feel better about how you look, although such things have their place in our lives and in our self-esteem.

I’m referring to parts of our inner selves. For example, the attention and care we’re able to give to our relationships; our level of generosity toward others; our responsibility to our own needs; our connection with our spirituality; our self-awareness and ability to be present. You get the idea. As kids, our inner selves formed at miraculous rates, as we absorbed childhood lessons like little sponges. Now, in adulthood, of course, the need for reflection and introspection takes on a much deeper level of importance, and requires conscious effort to listen, to be awake to ourselves.

Lately I’ve been thinking about courage and the experiences we have in life that require great reserves of inner strength—and how we go about tapping into those reserves when we need them.

Most of us have at least an abstract idea of what we feel our life is supposed to be like. And then something happens, an experience throws us for a loop with fear and anxiety and the unfamiliar. Perhaps we bring it upon ourselves. Perhaps it blindsides us because we weren’t listening, weren’t paying attention to the adult lessons. What we’re really up against is the pain and disappointment of trying to live up to promises we make to ourselves—and the shame we feel when we fail.

So what do we do with this?

How do we convince ourselves that we will be OK? Last year, a friend gave me for a birthday present a CD of the lecture “The Great Unknown” by English author, poet and lecturer David Whyte. What a gift! It is so dense with inspiration that I knew I would want to revisit it from time to time for my own “tune-ups” as well as share it with you here.

This particular lecture deals with courage, with stepping off from that place of comfort and placidity into the unknown. He poses many questions—and no answers. And if you’re a regular Shrink Rapper you know the importance of discovering your own answers and honoring YOUR truth, which is not your parents’ or your partner’s or your children’s…but yours.

Whyte defines courage as the ability to cultivate a relationship with the unknown, to engage in conversation with those things that are yet unfamiliar. The first question to arise may be: How can I be sure there will be safety there? And of course, you can’t.

The big question becomes: How will your courage appear? Will you be more courageous when all the conditions are “perfect?” When the boss gives you time off, the kids are out of college, the house is paid off?

THEN you’ll be courageous? THEN you’ll step into the life you promised yourself? The catch is that perfection of conditions never occurs. And if you’re honest, you already knew that.

One of the best ways I’ve found to tap into those inner reserves of strength is to talk to ourselves, kindly and without judgment. To remind ourselves that whatever

Dr. Rick

we’re going through is simply an experience. It is not good, not bad—just an experience. And indeed, one we will survive. A week from now (or a month or a year) this will all be behind us, and we can get back to the business of our life’s freedom, and continue our journey knowing that we survived, now stronger and more aware, yet again.

Author Betty Mahalik, who wrote Living a Five Star Life, talks about the fences we erect in our mind. By this she refers to those limitations we put on ourselves, based upon erroneous beliefs, fear, self-esteem issues, uncertainty, self-doubt, the need to self-sabotage, etc.

She encourages us to remember that the real limitations are not external. They exist within us.

And if they are within, we have the ability, whenever we need, to give them their “tuneups”—to breathe, and find the courage to survive; to explore and grow beyond our self-imposed limitations.

Until next time: “Give wine, give bread, give back your heart to itself, to the stranger who has loved you all your life, who knows you by heart.” — David Whyte

“What we’re really up against is the pain and disappointment of trying to live up to promises we make to ourselves—and the shame we feel when we fail.”

Dr. Rick Pimental-Habib, Ph.D., is a psychotherapist, minister, and educator, in private practice in Chattanooga, and the author of “Empowering the Tribe” and “The Power of a Partner.” Visit his web site at www.DrRPH.com

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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COVER STORY

Music, Past To Future

Ten on the Last Ten

The city’s music lovers talk past, present and future scene

By Tara Morris-Viland, Pulse Contributing Writer

Ten years ago I was 16, barely able to decipher

the world, where my life was going and up to things that will more then likely keep me from becoming president. With this said, the only thing I remember about the music scene in Chattanooga 10 years ago is sneaking into The Local to see my friends play and blaring 36 Mafia as we rode around the ridge exploring the freedom that comes with your friend’s mom’s car.

There is no doubt our city has changed in many ways since the ’90s—but I wanted to take a step back and ask around about how it has changed in the past decade. We each have our own experiences to bring 10

The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

to the dance floor when it comes to music. Classical, punk, or hard-core rap: Each produces a love that stretches across all backgrounds, and while each style may differ, one must respect the other. We have our music snobs and equal-opportunity genre hoppers. but when it is all said and done, there is no other feeling that beats hearing your song and learning new ones.

We can go into history all day but I wanted to hear what our peers have to say; what they love, their favorite memories, and what they wish to see in our future.

Here are 10 in the past 10 right out of your own Scenic City.

COVER STORY

Music, Past To Future Travis Christian Upton Mr. Chattanooga/Hat Model

Jeni Brown Backbone Superwoman to JJ’s “I haven’t always been Downtown Jeni Brown. As a very young Jennifer Brown, I fondly remember my mother taking me to Miller Plaza, in the middle of a week day, to see plays. My family moved to Ft. Oglethorpe in 1984, where we found Pops In the Park. This is where I met and fell in love with the Chattanooga Symphony and Opera and the Purple Lady.

“A decade later, I was back downtown to see more shows. Yesterdays, the Sand Bar, and the Blue Angel were my favorite hangouts. Now with two daughters who are becoming more interested in music and the social aspect of gathering with friends to enjoy it I am especially thankful Miller Park is still here for our entertainment.”

“Ten years ago, Chattanooga was still very much a club city with DJs mixing the hits of the day, People went out to dance. Dancing was as much of an activity as the type of music being played.

I must admit I still miss the variety of the clubs that were in the city at that time. Now Chatty is more of an event city from a electronic standpoint; however, live music now fills the halls of bars and clubs more than I have ever seen, which I really appreciate. What has not changed much is how segregated the music/ entertainment/ events scene still is. This bothered me then and it bothers me a great deal today. There is so much beauty in music and culture and everyone should experience each other’s. If there is anything we need to focus on above all else, it is how to resolve this still perplexing issue.”

the best indie bands! Leticia Wolf bartended and Marty Bohannon was the manager. Mike McDade hosted the open mic and Kellye Johnson did some of the bookings and always brought the most cutting-edge bands. I remember seeing Syrup, a band out of Florida there. They were all 6’5” and dressed in cowboy boots and boas. It was true cock rock! I’d love to see more clubs bringing live music in, better pay for the musicians and get rid of the karaoke!”

Jen Gregory Track 29 Booking Lady/Nonprofit Musical Beauty “Ten years ago I was serving cocktails at Rhythm & Brews and watching some amazing shows with wide-eyed wonder. Nickel Creek right as they hit it big, Sam Bush, Victor Wooten with his entire family and Speech from Arrested Development in tow, to name a few. I’ll never be able to thank Mike Dougher enough for exposing me to all the wonders of the music industry.

I also watched some very talented local Gail Lindsey musicians looking for ways to make the Mama Bird to Open Mic Singer/ Chattanooga music community a betSongwriters ter place.

“Fast forward to today, and we’ve “The Attic was by far the best place come a long way, with still more strides to see live music 10 years ago. They had www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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COVER STORY

Music, Past To Future

to be made. Our local music scene is blossoming nicely with the help of multiple organizations and new venue arrivals. I’m proud to be a part of the Chattanooga music community as it grows, and I can’t wait to see it another 10 years from now!”

Chris Willis Chattanooga State Media Professor/ Indian Cuisine Supporter

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Adam Foster Punk Metal Daddy/Teenage Dream “I booked my first show in my grandma’s garage a decade ago. The line up was Blisstap, Man vs. Tree, Smoke Choke Croak, Lowline Destruction & The Gromptkins, a diverse mix of bands playing to an all-ages crowd who enjoyed every second of it. Unfortunately, the police don’t appreciate underground music; my 80-year-old grandma was arrested for operating an unruly household. In the past decade, the underground music scene has taken off in many directions. Gone are the days of musical diversity. Shows are genre-specific. The smoking ban passed in 2007 killed many all-ages venues. I’d like to see an all ages multi-genre event where everyone is supportive of each other.”

“During the last 10 years, I’ve been pleased at the progress in many genres of popular music, but also amazed at the stale repetition of others. As a child of grunge, musical greatness for me pretty much died with Kurt Cobain, even though the best part of that band lives on in The Foo Fighters. The late ’90s were a dark time of boy bands and commercial rock, but bands like Linkin Park, Outkast, and others around 2000 were a breath of fresh, rockin’ air. Most importantly for me, the last 10 years have brought changes in the ways we Jonathan Susman discover new music, breakin’ away from Man Face for Chattanooga Presents charts and TRL to finding whatever you and Beyond want on YouTube and Pandora.”

“I apologize. I was one of the people 10 years ago that riddled your windshields with my band’s handbills touting some show at The Attic, Rhythm & Brews or wherever. We had to. There wasn’t Facebook. That was the music scene to me 10 years ago. Bands. Pushing. Forward. After more than six years in Nashville, I returned to an incredible scene with more organization than anything I left behind. Truly remarkable The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

COVER STORY

Music, Past To Future

and growing by the day! Chattanooga will become an even Brett Nolan bigger music city if the people that are doing what they’re Musical Engineer/Baby Maker to a Belly Dancer doing keep it up. It’s inevitable. Bands. Pushing. Forward.”

“Looking back over the past decade in Chattanooga music, I can’t help but wonder if we’ve become more of a musical city or if a lot of us have just been involved so long we’d like to think it so. I cannot speak on how things were before I came into ‘local musical consciousness’ but I can comment on where I and others involved believe local musicians could benefit in further diversifying and organizing the force that is Chattanooga music. I only hope we can continue to grow to support each other more, taking into account that to be taken seriously we should be serious and on the same page as to what it is (if anything) we are trying to accomplish, both as individuals as well as a community.”

Pris Simmons Retired and Ready to Groove!

“Chattanooga is revolving into a more cosmopolitan city, and it is reflected in the live music now available in restaurants, bars and other indoor and venues. I love that it is eclectic selection…something for everyone. Country, jazz, bohemian, classical, pop, soul, bluegrass, gospel, opera—some is so new I don’t know what is called. I think the opening of Sugar’s Ribs on Broad Street with their live music every weekend flowing out into the street is awesome. We all need to support the businesses that bring the live performers.”

Brandy Burgans Tattoo Goddess/Weekend Jager Yoga Instructor “I’ve been attending live shows at local Chattanooga venues for 15 years, so I’m pleased with the influx of new styles of music outside the typical Chattanooga ‘rock’ scene that was so prevalent in the ’90s. Though small in size, JJ’s Bohemia is a shining jewel in the rough, and the definitive answer to Chattanooga’s music diversity conundrum. We also need more larger acts to bring more diversity in the crowds, and under the same roof. Our city is evolving and growing, therefore our music scene should as well. I believe Track 29 could be the newest venue to deliver those bigger names, and therefore more diversity in the masses. Finally.”

To add to the conversation, myself and everyone here at The Pulse want you to email us, comment online on our Facebook page with your decade memories and dreams for the future.

And don’t forget to post that awesome Y2K picture! www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

ARTS

Feature

Depth of Vision

By Michael Crumb, Pulse Arts Writer

S

haun LaRose has a major show at the new 1800 Main Street venue, which includes not only his paintings, but also interesting home furnishings pieces. Of these, there is an impressive mirror with a wood collage frame, an elegant example of interior design.

LaRose has a number of paintings in house, and these works demonstrate a wonderful aesthetic sensibility. Folks who frequent Greyfriar’s coffeehouse have some familiarity with LaRose, since he did their signature painting, and he has other works on display there. When CreateHere did their “Scary Stuff” show a couple of years back, LaRose’s “Dorian Gray” was arguably the best piece in that show.

The 1800 Main Street location presents an unusual mix of fine artwork and quality furnishings. Proprietor Rachel Conn invites folks from Chattanooga and the surrounding region to discover how they may upgrade their home environments with a wide range of available works.

Besides LaRose’s featured show, other artists include Denice Bizot, a metal sculptor who has moved the Chattanooga, having grown up in New Orleans, and Christopher Mosey, who is familiar to Chattanoogans from his Ignis Glass Studios. Anderson Bailey presents a number of interesting pottery pieces, and other artists are represented by both fine arts pieces and furniture designs.

“Enclosed pieces of chain-link fence material are suspended by chains, and his paintings are affixed to either one or both sides of these industrial constructions.”

An impressive rock called “Raspberry Alabaster” presented by Dale McEntire from Salvida, North Carolina provides an interesting example of individual pieces placed by artists at 1800 Main. The range of offerings here is also broadened by collaborations with Set in Stone artisans, who are located on West Main Street, and by Peggy Patton, from this same West Main neighborhood, who provides both fine art and antiques.

Denice Bizot’s work impresses through her multi-dimensional approach to production. She often works with found objects, but her technique tends to transcend the material’s origin. An excellent painting on a piece of sheet metal or a car hood worked in an elegant filigree with very precise torchwork indicate her versatility and her vision. Bizot has a number of pieces at 1800 Main.

Mosey’s work remains both imaginative and impressive. His creative attitude toward his materials developed his media into fascinating objects.

A unique quality of the LaRose paintings has to do with how they are hung. Enclosed pieces of chain-link fence material are suspended by chains, and his paintings are affixed to either one or both sides of these industrial constructions. The additional dimension of aesthetic effect situates these works in a contemporary setting, suggesting how thoughts about art have developed.

Also, they provide a material, textural context to the paintings themselves, which have wood frames with the paint on wood panels. Metal and wood are basic elements of our cultural environment.

Kathryn Faulkner-Lindley, who hung this show at 1800 Main, pointed out a painting by LaRose that she particularly liked called “Pandora’s Box.” Clearly a mythic subject, LaRose’s treatment suggests a more contemporary situa-

tion in the archetypal surreal mode. The figure of a young girl, avid in expression, with green fingernails, holds the box. The background is complex. La Rose has developed a paint technique that shows paint splotches against other colors. Throughout this painting, a whole rainbow of color tones works through balanced tonalities. I wondered if this background suggests the girl’s sensorium as she holds the box of a kind of diamond motif. There are arches and windows in the background, a bit of sky paradoxically interiorized behind the girl. Two enigmatic birds occupy the lower foreground. This painting expresses well a sense of wonder.

This sense of wonder thematically connects the other paintings as well. Two paintings, “Painted Lady” and “Fourth Turning” seemed fairly complementary, somewhat suggestive of feminine representations found in the Tarot, with complex geometric backgrounds that seem to combine lunar and solar themes and color tonalities.

Another involved surreal subtext. “The Escape Plan” combines the figures of a girl and a bird into a quite worthy classically surreal treatment. The diptych “Landscape I” presents a natural paradox of the simple and the complex.

See these paintings!

1800 Main 1800 E. Main St. (corner of Hawthorne and Main) (423) 718-2543.

Artists’ Reception 5:30 – 8 p.m.

Friday, July 8

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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ARTS

Arts & Events Calendar FRIDAY

THURSDAY

Jeff Dunham: Identity Crisis Tour Puppet-loving comic takes over the Memorial. $48 7:30 p.m.

Memorial Auditorium, 399 McCallie Ave. (423) 642-TIXS. chattanoogaonstage.com

Thursday

Dynamo of Dixie Downtown Tour 10 a.m. Sheraton Read House, 827 Broad St. (423) 228-0448. www.chattanoogasidewalktours.com All American Summer Music Series 6 p.m. Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944. www.huntermuseum.org Bluff and Bridges Downtown Tour 7 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 1 Walnut St. (423) 228-0448. www.chattanoogasidewalktours.com Mystery of the TV Talk Show 7 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839. www.funnydinner.com Hairspray 7 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, Main Stage, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com Lookouts vs. Huntsville Stars 7:15 p.m. AT&T Field, 201 Power Alley. (423) 267-2208. www.lookouts.com Jeff Dunham: Identity Crisis Tour 7:30 p.m. Memorial Auditorium, 399 McCallie Ave. (423) 757-5156. www.chattanoogaonstage.com

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Patrick Deguire 8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com Chattanooga Ghost Tour 8:15 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 100 Walnut St. (423) 821-7125. www.chattanoogaghosttours.com

Friday

Dynamo of Dixie Downtown Tour 10 a.m. Sheraton Read House, 827 Broad St. (423) 228-0448. www.chattanoogasidewalktours.com Born to be Wild 3D 6, 8 p.m. IMAX Theater, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. www.tnaqua.org Ultimate Wave Tahiti 3D 7, 9 p.m. IMAX Theater, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. www.tnaqua.org Mystery of Flight 138 7 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839. www.funnydinner.com Bluff and Bridges Downtown Tour 7 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 1 Walnut St. (423) 228-0448. www.chattanoogasidewalktours.com Patrick Deguire 7:30, 10 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com Shakespeare’s Love’s Labour’s Lost 7:30 p.m. Ensemble Theatre of Chattanooga, 1918 Union Ave. (423) 987-5141. ensembletheatreofchattanooga.com Disney’s Beauty & the Beast 8 p.m. Signal Mountain Playhouse, Corner of James Blvd and Rolling Way, Signal Mountain. www.smph.org

MANIFEST: The Storms of Summer Poetry Slam 8 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081.

Rent 8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, Circle Stage, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com Hairspray 8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, Main Stage, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com Chattanooga Ghost Tour 8:15 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 100 Walnut St. (423) 821-7125.

Stand Up Comedy! Tim Kidd 9:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839.

Female Impersonation Show Midnight. Images, 6065 Lee Hwy. (423) 855-8210. www.imagesbar.com

Saturday

Dynamo of Dixie Downtown Tour 10 a.m. Sheraton Read House, 827 Broad St. (423) 228-0448.

Brainerd Farmers Market 10 a.m. Grace Episcopal Church, 20 Belvoir Ave. (423) 458-6281.

Chattanooga River Market 10 a.m. Tennessee Aquarium, 1 Broad St. (423) 648-2496. www.chattanoogamarket.com Enrichment Day 10 a.m. Chattanooga Zoo, 301 North Holtzclaw Ave. www.chattzoo.org Bridal Open House Noon. Georgia Winery, 6469 Battlefield Pklwy., Ringggold.

(706) 937-WINE. www.georgiawines.com

Hairspray

The musical based on the John Waters film. $17.50 - $25 8 p.m.

Chattanooga Theatre Centre, Main Stage, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com Arts Live: Cooking on the Rooftop Noon. Creative Discovery Museum, 321 Chestnut St. (423) 648-6043. www.cdmfun.org Art till Dark Noon. 40 Frazier Ave. (423) 413-8999. www.arttildark.com Rock City Summer Music Series Noon. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd. Lookout Mountain.

(800) 854-0675. www.seerockcity.com Shakespeare’s Love’s Labour’s Lost 2 p.m. Ensemble Theatre of Chattanooga, 1918 Union Ave. (423) 987-5141. ensembletheatreofchattanooga.com Mystery at the Nightmare Office Party 5:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839.

Born to be Wild 3D 6, 8 p.m. IMAX Theater, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695. www.tnaqua.org Bluff and Bridges Downtown Tour 7 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 1 Walnut St. (423) 228-0448. www.chattanoogasidewalktours.com Ultimate Wave Tahiti 3D 7, 9 p.m. IMAX Theater, 1 Broad St. (800) 265-0695.

ARTS

Arts & Events Calendar

SATURDAY

“Who’s Your Civil War Ancestor?”

Workshop at the Library explores family on both sides of the conflict.

Free 10 a.m - noon Auditorium, Downtown Library, 1001 Broad St. (423) 757-5310. lib.chattanooga.gov

Chattanooga FC vs. GA Revolution 7 p.m. Finley Stadium, 1826 Carter St. www.chattanoogafc.com Patrick Deguire 7:30, 10 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com Disney’s Beauty & the Beast 8 p.m. Signal Mountain Playhouse, Corner of James Blvd and Rolling Way, Signal Mountain. www.smph.org Rent 8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, Circle Stage, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com Hairspray 8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, Main Stage, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534.

Mystery at the Redneck-Italian Wedding 8 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839.

An Evening with Comedian Faizon Love and Friends 8:30 p.m. Tivoli Theatre, 709 Broad St. (423) 757-5050. www.chattanoogaonstage.gov

SUNDAY

Movies in the Park 9 p.m. Coolidge Park, 150 River St. www.firstthings.org Chattanooga Ghost Hunt 9:30 p.m. Patten Chapel, 615 McCallie Ave. (423) 821-7125. www.chattanoogaghosttours.com Stand Up Comedy! Tim Kidd 10:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839. www.funnydinner.com Female Impersonation Show Midnight. Images, 6065 Lee Hwy. (423) 855-8210. www.imagesbar.com

Sunday

Dynamo of Dixie Downtown Tour 10 a.m. Sheraton Read House, 827 Broad St. (423) 228-0448. www.chattanoogasidewalktours.com Chattanooga Market 11 a.m. First Tennesee Pavilion, 1826 Reggie White Blvd. www.chattanoogamarket.com Rock City Summer Music Series Noon. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd. Lookout Mountain.

(800) 854-0675. www.seerockcity.com Shakespeare’s Love’s Labour’s Lost 2, 7:30 p.m. Ensemble Theatre of Chattanooga, 1918 Union Ave. (423) 987-5141. ensembletheatreofchattanooga.com Hairspray 2:30 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, Main Stage, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534. www.theatrecentre.com Bluff and Bridges Downtown Tour 7 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 1 Walnut St. (423) 228-0448. www.chattanoogasidewalktours.com

Patrick Deguire 8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Rd. (423) 629-2233. www.thecomedycatch.com Movie Night 8 p.m. Sluggo’s North Vegetarian Cafe, 501 Cherokee Blvd.

(423) 752-5224.

Chattanooga Ghost Tour 8:15 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 100 Walnut St. (423) 821-7125. www.chattanoogaghosttours.com

Monday

Dynamo of Dixie Downtown Tour 10 a.m. Sheraton Read House, 827 Broad St. (423) 228-0448. www.chattanoogasidewalktours.com Bluff and Bridges Downtown Tour 7 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 1 Walnut St. (423) 228-0448.

Chattanooga Ghost Tour 8:15 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 100 Walnut St. (423) 821-7125. www.chattanoogaghosttours.com

Tuesday

“Southside Casual Classics” Monthly Recital Series 8 p.m. The CampHouse, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081.

Chattanooga Ghost Tour 8:15 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 100 Walnut St. (423) 821-7125. www.chattanoogaghosttours.com

Wednesday

Dynamo of Dixie Downtown Tour 10 a.m. Sheraton Read House, 827 Broad St. (423) 228-0448. www.chattanoogasidewalktours.com Main Street Farmers Market 4 p.m. Main St. at Williams St. www.mainstfarmersmarket.com

Ice Cream Social at the Market Time once again for the giant plastic Mayfield cow!

Free 11 a.m. – 4 p.m.

Chattanooga Market, First Tennessee Pavilion, 1826 Reggie White Blvd. chattanoogamarket.com

2nd Annual Tasting for the Tatas 6 p.m. Terra Nostra Tapas & Wine, 105 Frazier Ave. (423)326-4624.

Bluff and Bridges Downtown Tour 7 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 1 Walnut St. (423) 228-0448. www.chattanoogasidewalktours.com Lookouts vs. Mobile Baybears 7:15 p.m. AT&T Field, 201 Power Alley. (423) 267-2208. www.lookouts.com Chattanooga Ghost Tour 8:15 p.m. Walnut Street Bridge, 100 Walnut St. (423) 821-7125. www.chattanoogaghosttours.com

Ongoing

“Dinosaurs!”

Chattanooga Zoo, 301 North Holtzclaw Ave. (423) 697-1322.

Chattanooga Fiber Arts Group Exhibition North River Civic Center, 1009 Executive Dr. Ste. 102.

(423) 870-8924.

All Member Salon Show AVA Gallery, 30 Frazier Ave. (423) 265-1282. www.avarts.org “Between the States” Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View. (423) 266-0944. www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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OPINION

On The Beat

The Right Place At The Wrong Time “Y

ou can’t tell me,” I said, “you’re feet ain’t movin’.” My partner stared at me blankly.

We were investigating a shooting in a nightclub. That is, to say, “a” shooting.

Specifically, it would be more accurate to say “our” shooting since we were the victims. I can explain.

We worked in a part of town where the few clubs that were open required metal detectors at the door and Kevlar in the parking lot. We’d left the district this night to eat per policy, and simply decided to make a stop on the way back…not so much in policy, but rather a “gray area”, and being a bit ashen in my state of mind those days, I figured nothing could go wrong, and it didn’t. Right away.

The place we stopped in required a collared shirt (as opposed to an HMO), a wallet full of cash and a large credit limit. By some freakish coincidence this was also the night that the wait staff was to rip out the soiled carpet from the bar and dance floor areas after hours, and as it happened this wait staff was wearing high heels, short shorts, and a variance of fishnet stockings seen few places outside of a Frederick’s of Hollywood catalog.

I’m serious; “wide chevron”, “Aire diamond”, “Aire fence” fishnet styles…who’d have thunk so many variances could exist? What I was seeing transcended inappropriate late-night cable television; this was something new, something being born right in front of me and after years of bored numbness and a general inability to be shocked (much less surprised), I was unexpectedly watching a herd of stupid-hot chicks

ripping up carpet in porngrade outfits. I wasn’t excited, mind you; this wasn’t foreplay—I was witnessing art, possibly even some sort of bump up the evolutionary scale that amazed me right up to the point a bouncer across the room dropped a .32 cal. Derringer he’d taken off a customer earlier and it discharged, filling the establishment with a very unexpected “boom”.

Silence enveloped the room, and the hottie-chicks froze like the emotional deer that they were. I did too because in my first instinctual glance I saw no wounds on my partner, and feeling nothing myself, I decided I’d probably been hit.

I wasn’t supposed to be there and I felt no sting; prior experience had taught me that I would most likely feel the coldness of blood seeping into my clothes rather than traumatic pain, and that chilled clothing would be the indicator that I’d been perforated…but the longer I waited, the sooner I realized I had not, in fact, been popped—and Winston Churchill said it best when he pointed out there being no greater thrill than having been shot at…and missed.

Music was still playing and no one was falling down so I allowed myself a few seconds of relief when I reminded my partner (also a frozen yet observant Gollum) that his feet HAD to be movin’ to this music (see above) while I began to sway my hips and extend my thumbs at elbow-level to communicate my

Alex Teach

feigned-comfort. It worked.

He looked at me stupidly, then over at the nearest fishnet-coated thigh, then back at me, and stated, “We gotta GO.” Bless his heart.

We actually did a little checking to make sure the gun wasn’t stolen and appropriately disposed of (and another check to make sure no one had been hit, of course), but still fled the place with due haste, and as we pulled out, I began to laugh anew, prompting my partner to ask me, “Seriously? This is STILL funny to you?!”

“We ducked in there to get away from fireworks,” I pointed out. It was the Fourth of July, the bane of existence to most law enforcement, and the “booms” had followed us inside a den of inequity.

No, this wouldn’t be lost me, not at all.

“Happy Fourth, partner. Now let’s head back to the Hood.”

(Where it’s safe, of course.)

“The longer I waited, the sooner I realized I had not, in fact, been popped—and Winston Churchill said it best when he pointed out there being no greater thrill than having been shot at…and missed.”

When Officer Alexander D. Teach is not patrolling our fair city on the heels of the criminal element, he is an occasional student, carpenter, boating enthusiast, and spends his spare time volunteering for the Boehm Birth Defects Center. Follow him on Facebook at www.facebook.com/alex.teach

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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MUSIC

Feature

The Emergence of Trapstep

By Dave Castaneda, Pulse Music Writer

T

he worlds of electronic music and hip-hop go so crazy fast that so many different artists and subgenres pop up left and right in the blink of an eye. One particular subgenre I’m fascinated with is “Trapstep,” which takes that Dirty South hip-hop (a la Young Jeezy, Gucci Mane, Ludacris, etc.) and combines it with the dirty, grimy sounds of dubstep.

This subgenre of music has been around for a minute but has particularly gotten major exposure in Atlanta when prominent bass music producers decided that it’d be fun to mix in music from their own hometown.

Music enthusiast that I am, I always get random opportunities to work on unique events. This week I got to select Heroes & Villains as the dubstep producer to perform at the Gucci Mane concert at Club Fathom on Friday, July 8.

I had to think about many ways to approach this story because of the amount of controversy that surrounds “Mr. Zone 6.” However, subjects like music are always open to discussion and we encourage anyone to write into The Pulse with their own personal opinions.

peaceful, genres of music. He not only has the support of the hiphop community but he has massive support coming in from the indie dance scene as well. Give me a second to explain this how he has major crossover appeal that no one seems to fathom.

Gucci Mane has performed with the likes of Andrew W.K., Diplo, Kid Sister and more. Why Diplo is important to mention is because he is one of the major players, having production credits alongside M.I.A., Chris Brown, Major Lazer, Robyn, Shakira, and Snoop Dogg just to name a few.

The “Free Gucci” mixtapes released by Diplo’s record label, Mad Decent, have also garnered major media attention with remixes from top electronic producers such as Memory Tapes, Flying Lotus, Salem, Zomby, and Teenwolf. The Atlanta rapper has also gotten attention in the UK through Sinden’s remix album, featuring remixes from UK bass producers such as Toddla T, Rude Kid, Lele, and Hudson Mohawke, to name a few. These mixtapes are available for free on MadDecent.com and are recommended for listens before the show.

Gucci Mane’s influence in the electronic music circles is massive!

Knowing how much support Gucci Mane was getting from Mad Decent, it was obvious that picking Heroes & Villains as the opening act would be the perfect choice to combine a diverse crowd of party animals. Heroes & Villains also reside on the Mad Decent record label and have released a free mix tape on the imprint that is hosted by Atlanta icon Lil’ Jon.

“Knowing how much support Gucci Mane was getting from Mad Decent, it was obvious that picking Heroes & Villains as the opening act would be the perfect choice to combine a diverse crowd of party animals.”

Gucci Mane is arguably one of the most notorious Southern rappers of this decade. He is most known for being in and out of jail on a consistent basis. This means that his shows are very rare these days. However, I would not let that scare you, considering that a majority of his fans crossover to other, more

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Heroes & Villains hails all the way from Atlanta and focuses on production that combines elements of house, punk rock, dubstep, electro, rap, and hardcore. Having a remix portfolio that reads more like the playlist of Power 94 guarantees that this event will send the dance floors into a frenzy. Their work includes remixes for Roscoe Dash, Waka Flocka, Gucci Mane, Travis Porter and Lil’ Jon. What I am most excited to see is how the crowd reacts to this new take on the Dirty South sounds that they are already used to. I love it when people are exposed to new categories of music.

After interviewing and talking to the promoter of the show, Steve Matherly, I’ve come to find out that he is setting out to make a unique experience. There will be a separate VIP floor where guests will be treated to their own bar area and exclusive posters from the show. Safety is a huge thing for the producers of this event and they have assured me that there will be plenty of security and hired police officers at the show to ensure a safe and fun show. The diverse lineup is rounded out with new hip-hop artist Kafani and DJ Hollywood Oompa. If you’re into any sort of hip-hop or bass music, then this one will be the one to watch this weekend.

Gucci Mane with Heroes & Villains $40 ($60 VIP) 9 p.m.

Friday, July 8 Club Fathom, 412 Market Street www.tennesseepushers.com

MUSIC

New Music Reviews

The Spits

The Midnight Eez

(Thriftstore/In the Red)

(All City)

Kill the Kool

Musical satirist Tom Lehrer referred to rock and roll as “children’s records” way back in 1959, before the arrival of punk music cemented that notion. Punk is the music of youthful rebellion, and its embrace serves as a sort of rite of passage for any adolescent who didn’t take the pop or metal path toward peer acceptance. Yes, punk is still good for a kick in the britches, although limited and sometimes awkward— The Clash’s declaration to “burn down the suburbs” just seems cheeky today—and it’s sad to see anyone over the age of 25 dressed like a punk rocker. Maybe this is why the members of the Seattle punk explosion The Spits dress in costumes.

The Spits’ latest vinyl-only release, Kill the Kool, is a tour-only full-length, chock full of demos, outtakes, and single tracks, providing perhaps the best (and most generous) yet recorded document of the group, which never takes itself very seriously. Although the band’s song structures are squarely in the “classic punk” realm, a la Ramones, there are several off-kilter elements to its lo-fi agitation; the singing goes from hardcore barking to resembling a dopey, possibly mentally deficient version of Joey Ramone.

Attitude-wise, there’s a kinship with British D.I.Y. punk bands and outfits such as Crass, and the occasional keyboard parts bring to mind the sci-fi terror of Chrome or the proto-synth-punk of the legendary L.A. group The Screamers. The punk formula can wear out its welcome quickly, so the inclusion of the wacko 7” single Spend the Night in a Haunted House with the Spits is a good choice, featuring samples from Halloween sound effects albums mixed with choice bits of potty-mouthed girls screaming, taken from a tape found at a garage sale. If a deteriorating Sex Pistols T-shirt hangs in your closet and there’s room in your heart for one more punk record, give Kill the Kool a spin and rock on in your youthful abandon.

— Ernie Paik

The Midnight Eez

Almost nothing is known about The Midnight Eez, an instrumental hip-hop duo from the Bronx—not even the members’ names. There are artists such as the Residents and Question Mark (of Question Mark & the Mysterians) who have veiled their identities on purpose, but the case of The Midnight Eez is different. As the story goes, All City Records co-founder DJ Splyce from Dublin, Ireland (not to be confused with the American DJ Splyce) was visiting NYC in the mid-’90s and was approached outside a record store by the duo, which presented him with a demo tape with scant contact information: the band name and a pager number.

The tape was rediscovered recently during a house move, and All City was impressed enough to give it a proper release on vinyl and as digital downloads, despite not being able to track down the artists; needless to say, the pager number doesn’t work.

Neat story, sure, but does this demo tape from an unknown pair of hip-hop producers merit attention? Recorded at the tail end of the Golden Era of Hip-Hop, the 14 tracks of The Midnight Eez employ loops of some oftused rhythms, clearly placed in the realm of mid-’90s hip-hop, but despite this, the potential of the duo is apparent. What’s striking is a keen talent for composition, making the pieces and samples flow together in a logical manner, with a sense of balance and restraint.

Among the full-length tracks are a few fragments and sketches, suggesting the scrapbook nature of the release, but although it’s a homemade demo tape, it also has an air of sophistication, with soul and jazz nods, piano and electric piano flourishes, and smatterings of horn and sax passages to set a smoky, late-night cool-down mood. One can hear some effervescent inspiration, and if All City ever tracks down this twosome, a careful match with the right MC and some studio resources could lead to something even more impressive. — Ernie Paik www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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MUSIC

Concert Calendar FRIDAY

THURSDAY

Itchy Hearts

Let’s just say that one of their songs is “Paulo and Stinky.” $7 8 p.m.

JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd.

(423) 266-1400. myspace.com/jjsbohemia

Thursday

Ben Friberg Trio 7 p.m. Table 2, 232 E. 11th St. (423) 756-8253. www.table2restaurant.com Audience Choice Night 7 p.m. McHale’s Brewhouse, 724 Ashland Ter. (423) 877-2124. www.mchalesbrewhouse.com Open Mic Night 7:30 p.m. The CampHouse, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081. www.thecamphouse.com Blues Jam with Rick Rushing 7:30 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Soul Survivor 8 p.m. The Lounge at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com Summer Hullender 8 p.m. Acoustic Café, 61 RBC Dr., Ringgold, GA. (706) 965-2065. www.ringgoldacoustic.com Jimmy Harris 8 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com

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McNary, The Black Cadillacs, Elk Milk 9 p.m. The Honest Pint, 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 468-4192. www.thehonestpint.com Troy Underwood 9 p.m. The Office (inside Days Inn), 901 Carter St. (423) 634-9191.

Soul Crush 9 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. www.rhythm-brews.com Itchy Hearts 10 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia

Friday

Johnny Cash Tribute Band 5 p.m. Chattanooga Choo Choo Victorian Lounge, 1400 Market St. (423) 266-5000.

Jimmy Harris 6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055.

A Plea for Purging, Unspoken Triumph, Encounters, Alive for a Day 7 p.m. The Warehouse, 412 Market St. www.warehousevenue.com A.J. Valcarcel’s Bitter Lesson 7 p.m. Nightfall Concert Series, Miller Plaza, Downtown.

Live DJ Party 7 p.m. McHale’s Brewhouse, 724 Ashland Ter. (423) 877-2124. www.mchalesbrewhouse.com Mia Borders 8 p.m. Nightfall Concert Series, Miller Plaza, Downtown. www.nightfallchattanooga.com Davide Facchini and Anite Camarella 8 p.m. Charles and Myrtle’s Coffeehouse, 105 McBrien Rd. (423) 892-4960. www.christunity.org

Elk Milk, Raenbow Station 8:30 p.m. Barking Legs, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5547. www.barkinglegs.org The Power Players Show Band 9 p.m. Sugar’s Ribs Downtown, 507 Broad St. (423) 508-8956. www.sugarsribs.com/downtown Live Music 9 p.m. Raw Sushi Bar, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919. www.myspace.com/jimstriker DJ and Dancing 9 p.m. Spectators, 7804 East Brainerd Rd. (423) 648-6679.

DJ and Dancing 9 p.m. The Lounge at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055.

Gucci Mane, Heroes & Villains 10 p.m. Club Fathom, 412 Market St. (423) 710-6922. www.tennesseepushers.com Butch Ross 10 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Wrong Way: A Tribute to Sublime 10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. www.rhythm-brews.com Karaoke & Dancing 10 p.m. Chattanooga Billiards Club East, 110 Jordan Dr. (423) 499-3883. www.cbcburns.com

Saturday

Butch Ross 10 a.m. Incline Railway, 3917 St. Elmo Ave. (423) 821-9056. www.ridetheincline.com New Binkley Brothers Noon. Rock City Summer Music Weekends, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mtn.

Elk Milk, Raenbow Station

Fave bands in a different, nonsmoking show. $5 8:30 p.m.

Barking Legs Theater, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347. www.barkinglegs.org Kate Klim 12:30 p.m. Chattanooga Market, Tennessee Aquarium Place, 1 Broad Street. www.chattanoogamarket.com Johnny Cash Tribute Band 5 p.m. Chattanooga Choo Choo Victorian Lounge, 1400 Market St. (423) 266-5000. www.choochoo.com/localevents Jimmy Harris 6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com Pay the Sky 7:30 p.m. The CampHouse, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081. www.thecamphouse.com Milele Roots 8 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 2 31 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia Roger Alan Wade 8 p.m. Acoustic Café, 61 RBC Dr., Ringgold, Ga. (706) 965-2065. www.ringgoldacoustic.com Psych Factory with DJK7, Flux, Machines Are People Too 8 p.m. The Crash Pad, 29 Johnson St. www.facebook.com/event. php?eid=235077093188126

MUSIC

Concert Calendar

SATURDAY

Psych Factory with DJK7, Flux, Machines Are People Too

Dance, dance, dance dowtown. $5 8 p.m.

The Crash Pad, 29 Johnson St. (423) 648-8393. www.facebook.com/event. php?eid=235077093188126 Mark Stuart 8 p.m. Charles and Myrtle’s Coffeehouse, 105 McBrien Rd. (423) 892-4960. www.christunity.org/events Live Music 9 p.m. Raw Sushi Bar, 409 Market St. (423) 756-1919. www.myspace.com/jimstriker Skin Deep 9 p.m. Sugar’s Ribs Downtown, 507 Broad St. (423) 508-8956. www.sugarsribs.com/downtown Mark “Porkchop” Holder 9 p.m. The Office (inside Days Inn), 901 Carter St. (423) 634-9191.

Flibberty Gibbett 9 p.m. McHale’s Brewhouse, 724 Ashland Ter. (423) 877-2124. www.mchalesbrewhouse.com DJ and Dancing 9 p.m. The Lounge at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com Nuff Said: DJ Dara, Era-Step, Drug Money, Boogie B 9:30 p.m. Sluggo’s North, 501 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 752-5224

WEDNESDAY

Steam Boars 10 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Blake Morrison 10 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pk. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com Matt Stephens Project with Barnstormin’ 10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. www.rhythm-brews.com

Sunday

New Binkley Brothers Noon. Rock City Summer Music Weekends, 1400 Patten Rd., Lookout Mtn. Chris Hale 12:30 p.m. Chattanooga Market, First Tennessee Pavilion, 1829 Carter St. www.chattanoogamarket.com Alexa Woodward 1:30 p.m. Chattanooga Market, First Tennessee Pavilion, 1829 Carter St. www.chattanoogamarket.com Michael Jacobs 2 p.m. Chattanooga Market, First Tennessee Pavilion, 1829 Carter St. Ed Snodderly with Brandon Story 3 p.m. Barking Legs Theatre, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347. www.barkinglegs.org Free Range Mystics 3 p.m. Pasha Coffee and Tea, 3914 St. Elmo Ave. (423) 475-5482. www.pashacoffeehouse.com Open Mic with Mike McDade 7 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (inside Days Inn). www.facebook.com/theofficechatt Slim Pickens 8 p.m. The Honest Pint, 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 468-4192. www.thehonestpint.com

Karaoke with DJ Salt 9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. www.budssportsbar.com

Monday

Old Tyme Players 6 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Music Mondays 7 p.m. Pasha Coffee and Tea, 3914 St. Elmo Ave. (423) 475-5482. www.pashacoffeehouse.com E.T., The Greatest of These, Strip District 8 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia Big Band Night 8 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055.

Karaoke with DJ Salt 9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878. www.budssportsbar.com

Tuesday

Double Dealer, Will to Die, Bruteforce, Late Night Rage, more 7 p.m. The Warehouse, 412 Market St. www.warehousevenue.com Poison Control Center, Mythical Motors 7:30 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400. www.myspace.com/jjsbohemia Open Mic with Mike McDade 9 p.m. Tremont Tavern, 1203 Hixson Pk. (423) 266-1996. www.tremonttavern.com Karaoke with DJ Salt 9:30 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Rd. (423) 499-9878.

The Cleverlys, Bluegrass Pharoahs

Bluegrass meets The Office in The Cleverlys. $7 8:30 p.m.

Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. (423) 267-4644. www.rhythm-brews.com

Wednesday

Jimmy Harris 6:30 p.m. The Coconut Room at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055.

Ben Friberg Trio 7 p.m. Market Street Tavern, 850 Market St. (423) 634-0260. www.marketstreettavern.com Open Mic Night 8 p.m. Acoustic Café, 61 RBC Dr., Ringgold. (706) 965-2065. www.ringgoldacoustic.com Prime Cut Trio 8 p.m. The Lounge at The Palms at Hamilton, 6925 Shallowford Rd., #202. (423) 499-5055. www.thepalmsathamilton.com The Cleverly’s, Bluegrass Pharaohs 8:30 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. www.rhythm-brews.com Nouveaux Honkies with Jordan Hallquist 9 p.m. The Honest Pint, 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 468-4192. www.thehonestpint.com DJ ScubaSteve hosts Jenntastic Wednesdays 9 p.m. Holiday Bowl, 5518 Brainerd Rd. (423) 899-2695. www.holidaybowlbrainerd.com www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

OPINION

Life In The ‘Noog

Band Aid, Chattanooga Style L

ast Saturday there was a benefit concert and silent auction for my good friend John Johnson. You may remember late last year I wrote a piece about his being diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.

And because his medical bills continue to pile up, this was the third in an ongoing series of benefit concerts by local musicians who’ve rocked alongside John since the mid-’80s.

Back in the day, John was the hellraising lead anarchist/singer of the legendary outfit Feast of Pigs. Cutting his musical teeth on Schlitz Malt Liquor and loaded questions, John led Feast amid infamous peers such as Hank, The Kreed, The Abstracts, The Value and others in seedy underground haunts like The Brew n’ Cue, Hollywood’s, The Go-Go Club, Nucleus, and The London Connection.

John moved on to bigger and better things in the early ’90s, working in the film industry in San Francisco and Chicago before settling down in Austin, Texas where he lives today. In fact, we don’t see too much of John, although social media and good old-fashioned telephone calls keep the distance a little shorter. But even so, it’s nice when the old crew can all get together these days, and that’s just what happened last Saturday.

Pancreatic cancer is one of the most outrageously difficult hands one can be dealt in life. It’s like gambling on a pair of twos with nothing showing. The odds aren’t really in your favor, but at least you’ve got a pair. So when John announced he was making the trip from Austin to appear at this benefit in person, we knew it was going to be special.

Since all of the bands playing that night were made up of musicians John knows well from his time behind the mic, the night’s soundtrack had familiar sounds coming from familiar faces. That coupled with a “this is your life” audience made up of those who’ve loved John their entire lives made this gathering one none of us will ever forget—especially John.

Chuck Crowder

“When John announced he was making the trip from Austin to appear at this benefit in person, we knew it was going to be special.”

The last time since 1990 that I can recall this exact crowd of nearly 200 old friends in the same town, let alone the same room, might sadly have been just two years ago when John’s sister suddenly died. Like the celebration of Kelly’s life, this day we were celebrating John’s life still in progress, and paying living tribute to someone who’s touched our lives like few have or will. In a way, we were gathered to return some of the love he’s given us over the years, and just when he needs it most.

Speaking of sharing the love, it wasn’t hard to convince even those outside of our ranks that we needed to do everything in our power to make the financial burden a little easier on John and his wife Dawn.

Richard Lloyd of the legendary New York

band Television donated two free guitar lessons to be auctioned off. Chris Franz and Tina Weymouth of Talking Heads and Tom Tom Club donated autographed CDs and instruments for the auction. And everyone among John’s friends bid heavily on crap the others had lying around in their closets just to exchange memorable items and have an excuse to give John a little green.

Priceless though, is the feeling of love for John that swelled JJ’s Bohemia (nearly) beyond fire code limits and engulfed everyone lucky enough to be around him that night. All night everyone embraced John and each other as if we’d just then realized that the memories, friendships and people we sometimes take for granted won’t be there forever.

The last band to take the stage in John’s presence was The Unsatisfied, who he’d helped nurture early in their career some 25 years ago. Lead singer Eric Scealf directed just about every second of his performance toward making John smile and cheer just like the old days. At the end of their set, they played the song that—at least in local band folklore—was purely John: The Stooges’ “I Wanna Be Your Dog.” As the band flawlessly blazed through the song’s seemingly endless three chords, Scealf summoned the spirit of Iggy Pop’s voice and stage moves just like John had done more than two decades before. As he looked on smiling, we all knew that this would be a shining memory John would carry with him through every shitty moment of his struggle with cancer.

When the song was over, and John gave his last few hugs before turning to leave, there wasn’t a dry eye on even the toughest exterior in the house. We all knew that wherever life takes us, it might not ever be in the same direction again.

Chuck Crowder is a local writer and general man about town. His opinions are just that. Everything expressed is loosely based on fact, and crap he hears people talking about. Take what you just read with a grain of salt, but pepper it in your thoughts. www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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OPINION

Beyond The Headlines

Strange Like the Wolf

By Cole Rose, Pulse Contributing Writer

W

alking on Frazier Avenue on the Northshore, I was recruited by multiple hot-pink flyers imploring me to draw a picture of a wolf. This seemed like an odd request.

“Cartoon wolves, real wolves, small wolves, tall wolves, happy wolves, angry wolves, in color or black and white, wolves in the desert, wolves in the snow, wolves eating people, wolves flying planes, whatever!” The flyer answered all of my immediate questions.

“Because I collect pictures of wolves drawn by strangers.

Come on, you know you want to submit your own picture.”

I didn’t know if I wanted to submit a drawing as the flyer claimed, but I did know I didn’t not want to submit a drawing either.

The flyer implored me to mail in my art to a Red Bank P.O. Box addressed simply to: Wolves by Strangers.

I plucked a strip from the bottom of the hot-pink flyer and decided I would make no rash decisions. Aided partly by my newfound curiosity and largely by a Google search of “Wolves by Strangers,” I was immediately surprised to find that this local grassroots campaign had gone viral.

The website features daily entries of wolf art drawn by strangers, collected by someone who mysteriously signs off his posts simply as “J.”

“The website features daily entries of wolf art drawn by strangers, collected by someone who mysteriously signs off his posts simply as ‘J’.”

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The wolf art varies in aesthetic palatability from oilbased masterpieces to quick drawings that appear to have been concocted with Microsoft Paint. However, every piece is thoroughly examined and each ounce of value is extracted from the confines of the frame. J offers a substantial commentary on each drawing, incorporating references as far ranging as music videos from New Kids on the Block to the creative theories of Salvador Dali.

Although the concept of a wolf art website composed entirely by strangers is certainly intriguing, the whole concept raises the question: Why would a person go to such lengths to accumulate wolf drawings?

After conducting e-mail correspondence with the curator of this furry, four-legged extravaganza, things only seemed to get weirder. “J” is a male between the ages of 13 and 75, a lupine enthusiast, and “certainly a man who has a number of secrets.” He may be some sort of post-modern Robin Hood, robbing people of their self-obsessed lives and giving them back a little piece of childhood.

But still…wolf pictures? What’s in it for me? Is this some sort of scam? Why should I waste my time just to satisfy some weirdo’s wolf obsession?

I have to admit, these were my thoughts when I ini-

The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

tially saw the hot-pink wolf flyer. Surely this wolf-drawing collector is collecting return addresses for a giant mailing list for a new hobby shop or something.

That seems to be a common reaction for potential contributing artists, and this idea is exactly what J is trying to combat with what he views as a “social movement.”

“Realistically, the person who draws the picture has absolutely nothing to gain.

But, this project IS actually creating a level of fulfillment for people that this ego-fueled culture is failing to.

He certainly has a point.

Communication is becoming increasingly easier through media that allow the user to create a universe that is absolutely egocentric. J has tried to create an outlet that is not only selfless, but can also be completely anonymous; quite a change of scenery from modern communication.

I certainly wasn’t looking for social commentary or a new life philosophy when I happened across a Wolves by Strangers flyer, but J has helped me see that maybe we need the spirit of the wolf. We need to unleash our inner yearning to howl at the full yellow moon simply because it feels good to yearn. It feels good to howl. That isn’t so strange, is it?

And even if it is, I still had a lot of fun drawing this!

SCREEN

New In Theaters

Hush Hush, Voices Carry lights in taking massive bites out of the screen when it comes to overacting by talented actors.

Spacey, Aniston and Farrell all seem to delight in playing oversized baddies.

Starring Jason Bateman, Charlie Day, Jason Sudeikis Directed by Seth Gordon Project Nim A documentary on a 1970s experiment that aimed to show that a chimpanzee, if raised and nurtured like a human child, could learn to communicate with language. The man who brought us the amazing Man on Wire documentary somehow improves on his documentarymaking skills, using the setting of the attempt to teach a chimpanzee how to be human to take a deep look at 1970s sexuality and morals.

Directed by James Marsh

Zookeeper A group of zoo animals decide to break their code of silence in order to help their lovable zookeeper find love, without opting to leave his current job for something more illustrious. Let’s see...cute animals that talk? Check.

Rotund sad-sack comedian? Check. Familyfriendly movie in the midst of mindless action flicks and adult comedies? Check. In other words, it looks as if Kevin James has another hit on his hands, and is positioning himself as a more family (and waistline) friendly version of Adam Sandler. And considering that Sony Pictures rescued the film from MGM’s impending bankruptcy and paid to the distribute the film, Hollywood studios have high hopes for James’ future career prospects.

Starring Kevin James, Rosario Dawson, Leslie Bibb Directed by Frank Coraci Horrible Bosses Three friends make a pact to rid the world of their respective bosses. And while technically this film stars Jason Bateman, the main reason people are interested in the movie are the titular horrible bosses, played by a gleefully sadistic Kevin Spacey, an outrageously amorous Jennifer Aniston, and a nearly unrecognizable Colin Farrell with what may be the worst combover in Hollywood history. In many ways, this is a guy version of the classic 9 to 5 (without a catchy theme song, unfortunately) that de-

Beats Rhymes & Life: The Travels of a Tribe Called Quest A documentary on legendary hip-hop troupe A Tribe Called Quest, from their formation in the mid-1980s, through their 1990s heyday, to their troubled reunion and unclear future.

Director Michael Rapaport has crafted a hardscrabble look at one of the most influential bands of the ’80s who helped shape the future of pop music and the commercialization of hip-hop into modern culture. Alas, it becomes clearly apparent about midway through the documentary that it is highly unlikely the group will ever reunite, which is a loss for all music fans.

Starring Q-Tip, Phife Dawg, Ali Shaheed Muhammad Directed by Michael Rapaport The Ward In the isolation ward at the North Bend Psychiatric Hospital, a troubled new arrival is spooked by a ghostly presence that no one else will admit to seeing. As her peers begin to disappear, she takes it upon herself to uncover the ward’s dark secret. A lot of people were hoping that John Carpenter’s first feature since Ghosts of Mars would rehabilitate the now-tired horror/thriller genre that has been dominated by reboots, sequels, and an overreliance on handycams.

Unfortunately, a promising story is undone by low-budget production values and even lowerbudget special effects.

Starring Amber Heard, Mamie Gummer, Danielle Panabaker Directed by John Carpenter

facebook.com/chattanoogapulse www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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ENTERTAINMENT

Free Will Astrology

CANCER (June 21-July 22): While listening to the sound collage radio program “Over the Edge” on KPFA, I learned that a new primary color has been detected. Quite different from red, yellow, or blue, it has its own distinct hue that’s impossible to describe. You really have to see it to appreciate its essence. The discoverer of this marvel is Dr. Wohan Squant, who has named the color “squant.” (Full details here: bit.ly/Squant.) I wish I could predict you’re about to create or find something equally revolutionary, Cancerian, but I can’t go quite that far. Nevertheless, you’ve entered a phase when you have the power to tinker with and even transform fundamental laws of your universe. So who knows? Maybe you’re on the verge of a shift almost as revolutionary as the discovery of squant.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Are you feeling the sting of disappointment, railing at life for reneging on one of its promises to you? Are you in the throes of unleashing a great accusation, suffering the twisty ache that comes from having your pet theories disproved? Maybe you should consider the possibility that you are simply getting an opportunity to correct a misunderstanding—that life isn’t being mean to you and you’re not being punished. I’d like to propose that you are, in fact, in the first phase of your healing. Listen to Bengali writer Rabindranath Tagore: “We read the world wrong and say that it deceives us.”

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “The more one dwells on oneself,” says psychoanalyst Adam Phillips in his book Going Sane, “the more one is likely to suffer.” He thinks people need encouragement to avoid excessive introspection. “My project as a psychoanalyst,” he writes, “is to free them to not have to think about their lives so much.” While I feel he overstates the case, I do suspect his message would be good for you to heed in the coming weeks. For maximum success and robust mental health, take a generous portion of your attention off yourself and focus it on living your life with compassion, curiosity, and concern for others.

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The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): If there were a useful website with the domain name AmIAGoodPersonOrNot. com, I would advise you to go check it out. The same is true if there were websites like AmIAuthenticOrNot.com, AmIYummyOrNot.com, AmIEnlightenedOrNot.com, or AmIAGorgeousGeniusOrNot.com. What I’m trying to tell you, Capricorn, is that this would be an excellent time for you to find out more about yourself from objective sources -- or any other kind of sources, for that matter. Solicit feedback, my beautiful darling. Ask for updates on how you’re doing.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Ninety-six percent of all adults say they would change something about their appearance if they could. That statistic is one factor that leads philosopher Jonathan Zap to make this observation: “Suffering associated with body image has reached such epidemic proportions in our culture that it must be counted as one of the greatest spiritual plagues ever to be visited upon mankind.” That’s the bad news, Aquarius. The good news is that the coming months will be an excellent time for learning to be at more peace with how you look. I invite you to formulate a three-point plan that will help you come to a perspective in which you will love your body exactly the way it is.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): On her website Reuniting. info, Marnia Robinson reported on a discovery she made that may be useful to you. Wandering around a county fair, she went to a reptile exhibit where she encountered an animal trainer who had an alligator resting serenely on his lap.

She asked him why the creature was so well-behaved. “I pet it daily,” he said. “If I didn’t, it would quickly be wild again, and wouldn’t allow this.” Apply that lesson in your own life, Pisces. Bestow regular tenderness and loving touch to the feral, untamed, primitive influences in your life—including any that may reside within you.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “One must choose in life between boredom and suffering,” proclaimed author Madame de Staël (1766-1817). I beg to differ with her, however. As evidence, I present the course of your life during the next few weeks. After analyzing the astrological omens, I expect you will consistently steer a middle course between boredom and suffering, being able to enjoy some interesting departures from the routine that don’t hurt a bit. There may even be pain-free excursions into high adventure mixed in, along with a fascinating riddle that taxes your imagination in rather pleasurable ways.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): It’s my observation that women find it easier than men to tune into their natural rhythms. The menstrual cycle helps cultivate that ability.

We men experience less dramatic physical shifts, and that seems to give us license to override messages from our bodies for the sake of ambition, laziness, or convenience.

Having acknowledged that, I must say that I know men who are highly sensitive and responsive to somatic cues, and women who aren’t. Whatever gender you are, I believe that in the coming weeks it’s crucial for you to be acutely aware of what’s going on inside your beloved flesh-and-blood vehicle. This is one time when you need to be intimately aligned with its needs.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): I accompanied a friend and his family to a small fairgound where a local school was having a fundraiser. There were rides and games for younger kids. Right away we came to a challenging activity that involved climbing a ladder made out of rubber and coated with some slippery substance. One girl, about seven years old, was having a moment of rowdy bliss as she tried to ascend. “It’s impossible—but fun!” she cried out to her mom.

Your assignment in the coming week is to find an adventure like that: one that’s impossible but fun.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): One of the greatest kings of the ancient Persian Sassanid Empire was Shapur II (309379). Shortly after his father died, he was made king while still in his mother’s womb. Since he could not yet wear his crown, officials set it upon his mother’s pregnant belly. He ruled from then until the day he died, 70 years later. I’m naming him your patron saint for the second half of 2011, Taurus. My sense is that the seed of some great accomplishment is already germinating within you. It may take a while to be fully born, but I suggest we consecrate its bright future now.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “It is not always needful for truth to take a definite shape,” wrote Johann Wolfgang von Goethe. “It is enough if it hovers about us like a spirit and produces harmony; if it is wafted through the air like the sound of a bell, grave and kindly.” With this quote, I’m alerting you to the fact that a new truth is now floating into your world, Sagittarius. It’ll be misty and sparkly, yet somehow also decisive and lucid. It will comfort you and yours, but also be a bit shocking. It will be sharply tonic, like good, strong medicine that has a pungent yet oddly delicious flavor you’ve never tasted before.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): I’ve got no problem with the real world. I spend a lot of time there, enjoy its chewy riddles, and take it quite seriously. But I also consider myself a militant lobbyist for all the Other Worlds—the domain of everything that’s invisible to the naked eye and irrelevant to the schemes of the rational ego. These alternate realities consist of the unconscious, the dreamtime, the spiritual sphere, the intelligence of nature, and the realm of the ancestors. In my astrological opinion, you’re due for a major upgrade in your relationship with these dimensions in the next 12 months. Now would be a good time to get started.

ENTERTAINMENT

Jonesin' Crossword — "Better Living Through Chemistry" Across 1 Stirs (up) 6 The Emerald Isle 10 Far from appetizing 14 Go with the flow 15 “___: First Class” 16 Matty or Felipe of baseball 17 Result of The Hulk’s first press conference?

19 Darkness 20 Toilet paper layer 21 Two-___ (some bathing suits) 23 Wanna-___ (poseurs) 24 Half of zwei 25 Font close to Verdana 27 Where a journalist’s stories get turned in 31 Iditarod finish line 32 Analgesic target 33 Rather than 37 Greek letters that look like P’s 38 Shoes near the Reeboks and Nikes 39 Ceremonial act 40 Come out on top

42 Yours and mine, in the sticks 43 “I screwed up” 44 Jon running for president 47 Chinese fondue 49 Indie rock band ___ Riot 50 Tool paired with a bucket 51 Huffington behind the Huffington Post 53 ___-tai (cocktail) 56 Working away 58 “Let’s see who can prepare for their colonoscopy first,” et al.?

60 Jupiter’s Greek counterpart 61 Scott Baio co-star Moran 62 “Moon Over ___” (original theme song for “The Drew Carey Show”) 63 Muppet who speaks in the third person 64 Stunned state 65 French section of the

Alps Down 1 “Rent” star Anthony 2 Adam Lambert was on it 3 Word before Gaga or Antebellum 4 Prefix for dermis 5 “I’m with ___” (T-shirt phrase) 6 Over the top 7 Candy-colored computer 8 Stopwatch button 9 Contest participants 10 “___ the lizard king” (Jim Morrison) 11 Nightspot where you can’t be too big or too small?

12 Asian peninsula 13 Big laughs 18 “I got dibs!”

22 Jimmy Choo specialty 24 Viewing range 26 Brash contestant on “The Apprentice” 27 Sales rep’s handout 28 Number learned on

“Dora the Explorer” 29 Drug that’s only smoked in pictures?

30 Jewish delicacy 34 Gloomy 35 ___ vez (again, in Spanish) 36 Actress Sherilyn of “Twin Peaks” 38 Soaked up 41 Early baseball Hall-ofFamer ___ Rixey 45 Word said a lot by Mork 46 Vagabonds 47 Baltic Avenue building 48 Headwear for Miss America 50 Activity on a placemat 52 Tombstone locale: abbr.

53 Game show producer Griffin 54 Sphere start 55 Words before “old chap” 57 1800s Chinese general now found on menus 59 Lamb lament

Jonesin' Crossword created By Matt Jones. © 2011 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+ to call. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #0529

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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OPINION

Ask A Mexican

Special Soccer Edición Dear Readers, Ever since the Mexican national soccer team thrashed the American side, 4-2, in last month’s Gold Cup final, Know Nothings have railed about how Mexis in the U.S. root for El Tri against the norteamericanos.

They’ve invaded the Mexican’s mailbox with preguntas sobre fútbol, so rather than answer them, I’ll just reprint my two favorite soccer questions from the past—no need to reinvent the quesadilla, you know?

us in every socioeconomic category, even beat us in soccer—the United States has finally become Mexico’s worthy adversary instead of perpetual whipping boy.

So instead of wielding knives, our best revenge is the clever insult, the well-timed chinga tu madre whistle, and the beer poured upon Landon Donovan as he triumphantly exits the stadium.

All the great soccer-playing nations draw rabidly nationalistic fans, and the United States will remain a third-rate country until Americans cry “Tacos!” next time Mexico’s squad invades el Norte.

Gustavo Arellano

Dear Mexican, Why do Mexican soccer fans chant “Osama!

Osama!” when their side plays the United States? You don’t hear American soccer fans yell, “¡La migra!”

— White Boy Dash

Dear Gabacho: You think hurling bin Laden’s name is tasteless? How about the Daily Mail columnist who, on the day England faced West Germany in the 1966 FIFA World Cup final, wrote, “West Germany may beat us at our national sport today, but that would be only fair. We beat them twice at theirs”? Or the hooligans who greeted Jewish fans during a Lazio-AS Roma Italian league match with a banner that read, “Auschwitz is your town, the ovens are your houses”? This is soccer we’re talking about, not Wimbledon.

Offensive jeers are part of the game, and anyone who can’t take the heat should leave la cocina. Jingoism is the main reason fútbol is the world’s most popular sport and a global Two Minutes Hate: countries and regions can spill their aggression toward one another out on the pitch and in the stands instead of on the battlefield. That’s why Mexicans love to trash the United States when the two countries play. Ustedes exploit us, humiliate us, dominate

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Dear Mexican, Why do the Mexicans HATE American soccer and “hate” (bolded, underlined and italicized) Landon Donovan?

— Uncle Sam’s Army Brat Dear Gabacho:, Because Mexicans hate Americans—DUH! Geez, this is the literary equivalent of taking a penalty kick with no goaltender—but I also want to plug Gringos At the Gate, an upcoming documentary answering this very question with game footage and interviews with Mexican and American fútbol fanatics, former soccer stars and your humble scribe. I gave your question un cabezazo over to director Pablo Miralles, who delivered a bicycle kick of an answer (OK, OK: a yellow card for me for too many bad soccer metaphors).

The Pulse | Volume 8, Issue 27 | July 7, 2011 | www.chattanoogapulse.com

“On the first part: The average American doesn’t give a shit about fútbol, so how can they be as good or even better than us Mexicans, who are the most passionate and loyal fans?” Miralles asked the Mexican. “As for Donovan, Mexicans will say that the hatred comes from when, in 2004, he pissed on the field of the sacred Estadio Jalisco, home of the revered Chivas de Guadalajara.

But the truth, I believe, is that when he won the Golden Boot at the 1999 Under-17 World Cup (being the first player from this part of the world to win such an honor) and later the Best Young Player at the 2002 World Cup, the realization for Mexican fans set in that, for the first time, the best player on the field when the United States played Mexico was NOT a Mexican.

“Offensive jeers are part of the game, and anyone who can’t take the heat should leave la cocina.

Jingoism is the main reason fútbol is the world’s most popular sport.”

It’s one thing to be beat by a bunch of overeducated, hard-working, physical brutos, but the talent, the technical skill, the style—these are the attributes of El Tri. So how can it be this güero is winning these awards, think Mexican fans? Unacceptable!” Pablo, your answer was a GOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL! GOOD MEXICAN OF THE WEEK: El Tri—DUH! ¡Viva México, cabrones!

Have a question? Ask the Mexican at themexican@askamexican. net, be his fan on Facebook, follow him on Twitter or ask him a video question at www.youtube.com/askamexicano!

www.chattanoogapulse.com | July 7, 2011 | Volume 8, Issue 27 | The Pulse

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