M I N I S T R Y
P A R T N E R
T R A I N I N G
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WELCOME TO SKI PATROL
SouledOut ski patrol is a team of people dedicated to see middle school students discover the wonder of a lifelong relationship with Jesus Christ. This book is a tool in your hand--a guide on your journey to becoming a powerful influence in the lives of students. After today’s training, keep this tool as an ongoing reference. Thank you for your willingness to follow God’s call in the lives of students!
Y C N E G R E M E H FAIT The Barna Group reports that of those who attended church during high school only one-fifth of twenty-something’s (20%) are actively involved in a church.
DANGER The Barna Group also reports the percentage of teens who are evangelicals has declined from 10% in 1995 to just 4% today.
SKI AT OWN RISK
Hoping to provide the first broad, multi on this trend, Fuller Theological Semina Family Ministry recently launched a three this problem. Initial results reveal that 1 students in a pilot survey had engaged ing alcohol use and sexua
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We are losing four out of five students who attended church as teenagers.
A recent study by the National Study of Youth & Religion titled Portraits of Protestant Teens found 63% of Protestant teens reported cheating in school, compared with only 58% of all teens.
i-denominational research ary’s Center for Youth and e-year longitudinal study of 100% of 234 church-going in at risk behaviors includal encounters.
d oun f h c sear se who e R ay tho 35% LifeW among h only c by that he chur stently nsi et 0% leav rned co other 3 . retu 30. An y attend age adicall spor hree
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HOW DID WE GET HERE? Why are we failing to develop a life-long passionate relationship with Christ in our children? Two primary reasons: The Church Too often church leaders and pastors attempt to replace the home as the primary place of spiritual influence in the lives of students. The Parents Too often families give the responsibility of “fixing” their children to church leaders and blame the church when their students are not following God.
pment cannot lo ve de er ct ra a Faith and ch be outsourced! program is not a r fo s id k f of Dropping l and tee the spiritua n ra a u g to h g enou of our children. on ti a rm fo er ct ). chara is does not work th n ve ro p ’s it , (in fact
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We outsource everything to professionals: how to play catch, how to read, how to dance, how to study. We even outsource developing a walk with Jesus. One problem...it doesn’t work.
The average church spends 40 hours per year with each student. The average parents spend 3000 hours per year with their student. The job of the church is to use our 40 hours to influence the parents’ 3000 hours.
Church Leaders 40 hours per year
Parent 3000 hours per year
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At the base of Peak 1, students make a choice. They either continue to grow only from Peak 1, or they get onto Lift 2.
BEGINNER RUNS SouledOut Service The SouledOut service has two purposes: 1. DOORWAY: where students enter into the ministry. 2. DEPTH: Biblical teaching to help students become biblically literate.
ReMix Groups 1. The purpose of ReMix groups is to help students process God’s Word and apply it to their lives. 2. ReMix Groups establish key relationships. The ReMix Leaders are “YOUTH PASTORS“ of average sized youth ministries.
Winter Camp 1. Winter Camp is an extended time of relationship building among students. 2. Winter Camp is an important time for life-changing decisions.
Parent Section 1. The parent section is our initial opportunity to connect parents to the vision of driving faith at home rather than depending upon the Church.
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INTERMEDIATE RUNS Freestyle THRIVE
T H R I V E
TRAINING PARTNERS HELP THOSE IN NEED READ YOUR BIBLE INTENTIONAL AT HOME VOICE YOUR HEART
ENERGIZE YOUR MIND
Baptism 1. Baptism is a choice students make to publicly declare their faith in Jesus Christ. 2. In order for students to be baptized at WVC they must watch the “Freestyle DVD” with their parents. This DVD introduces “THRIVE.” Then the student and parents meet with a WVC staff person before baptism.
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At the base of Peak 3, students make a choice. They either continue to grow only from Peak 3, or they get onto Lift 4.
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ADVANCED RUNS 360째 Groups 360째 Groups create and link significant adults as coaches in the lives of students while providing TRAINING PARTNERS (other students) for teenagers to grow alongside.
360째 Groups provide students:
ACCOUNTABILITY Openly sharing struggles with people who truly love them.
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ENCOURAGEMENT Breathing life and courage into each other. COURAGE Discovering they are not alone as they face giant hurdles.
ACTS Projects ACTS Projects are opportunities that Woodmen Valley Chapel provides students and leaders to use their time and gifts to meet the needs of our community.
Third Project The Third Project is a project to mobilize students and their families to impact those most vulnerable to the effects of HIV/AIDS in Swaziland Africa.
Dare2Share Dare2Share is a ministry conference held in November to train students to share their faith and then go out to the streets of Denver to do it.
Driven Events Driven Events are events in which we bring in parenting experts to equip parents as they raise teenagers.
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PRO RUNS One11 Challenge One11 Challenge is a challenge to parents and students:
• ONCE a week 1 parent and 1 child
Parents and their teenager meet together for intentional breakfast, coffee, ice cream, etc.
The purpose of the One11 Challenge is to build a life-long intentional relationship between parents and their kids.
Mission Trips Our mission trips allow students to experience the transforming power of the Gospel in various ministry experiences and settings.
Amazed Race The Amazed Race challenges parents and students to connect together in a significant way while experiencing great adventures all over Colorado.
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Sponsorship
Sponsorship is part of the Third Project. However, this is a step higher. On this run we challenge students to sponsor a child in Swaziland on a monthly basis.
Legacy Legacy is a one-on-one discipleship program where parents commit to being discipled for a year before taking their own child and another parent through the same material the next year.
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Signs a student is growing on PEAK 1
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• Consistently attends SouledOut Service (3 out of 5 weeks) or attends Winter Camp. • Brings a Bible and pen and takes notes during the message. • Shares during ReMix discussions.
Signs a student is growing on PEAK 2
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• Consistently read Bible on their own at least once a week. • Takes a Booster pack in order to memorize Scripture. • Makes a declaration of their faith through baptism.
Signs a student is growing on PEAK 3
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• Consistently attends 360° Groups (3 out of 5 weeks). • Participates in an A.C.T.S. service project. • Consistently gives money in offering for the Third Project.
Signs a student is growing on PEAK 4
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• Consistently meets with parent intentionally for the One11 Challenge. . • Sponsors a child in Swaziland, Africa. • Participates in either the Amazed Race or Mission Trip with parent or mentor.
SCOREBOARD PEAK 1 WIN The student takes a Freestyle DVD.
PEAK 2 WIN The student joins a 360째 Group.
PEAK 3 WIN The student or the parent initiates an intentional activity.
PEAK 4 WIN The student and parent continue an intentional activity in high school.
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PATROL CODE
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I will regularly check my motives and evaluate my heart.
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I will recognize that the health of SouledOut reflects the spiritual health of me as a leader.
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I will recognize that we are in a very real war and we are on the front lines.
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I will consistently seek to grow and walk with Jesus on a daily basis.
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I will recognize that ministering to students is hard work and we need to endure.
Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting—Psalm 139:23-24.
Woe to you, O land whose king was a servant and whose princes feast in the morning. Blessed are you, O land whose king is of noble birth and whose princes eat at a proper time— for strength and not for drunkenness—Ecclesiastes 10:16-17.
Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings—1 Peter 5:8-9.
Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers—1 Timothy 4:16.
But you, keep your head in all situations, endure hardship, do the work of an evangelist, discharge all the duties of your ministry. For I am already being poured out like a drink offering, and the time has come for my departure. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. Now there is in store for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will award to me on that day—and not only to me, but also to all who have longed for his appearing—2 Timothy 4:5-8.
KNOW THE CODE THERE ARE ELEMENTS OF RISK THAT A PROPER HEART AND PERSONAL AWARENESS CAN HELP REDUCE. REGARDLESS OF HOW YOU DECIDE TO USE THE SLOPES, ALWAYS ADHERE TO THE CODE LISTED BELOW AND TEAM WITH OTHERS FOR A SAFE SOULEDOUT EXPERIENCE.
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I will reject the hyped view of youth ministry and realize that ministry is demanding.
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I will realize that I represent Jesus Christ to these students.
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I will serve, even when it’s uncomfortable.
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So do not be ashamed to testify about our Lord, or ashamed of me his prisoner. But join with me in suffering for the gospel, by the power of God, who has saved us and called us to a holy life— not because of anything we have done but because of his own purpose and grace—2 Timothy 1:8.
For we are to God the aroma of Christ among those who are being saved and those who are perishing. To the one we are the smell of death; to the other, the fragrance of life—2 Corinthians 2:14-17. Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” —Matthew 20:26-28.
I will constantly keep my “lonely, desperate, hurting kid “radar” engaged.
But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart”—1 Samuel 16:7.
I will recognize that I am on a mission field and am entering into a foreign culture.
To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law ... so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law ... so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings. —1 Corinthians 9:20-23
If SouledOut is a SKI MOUNTAIN, and students are the SKIERS/RIDERS, then the we are the SKI PATROL. As SouledOut Ski Patrol you have three jobs on the mountain:
GUIDE TEACH FIRST AID
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GUIDE A guide’s job is to help the skiers...
EXPERIENCE the mountain Ski patrol is dedicated to helping skiers have an amazing experience on their mountain. Ideally, every action, word, greeting, and smile is geared toward the skiers’ mountain experience. • KEY WORD: Connection • GOAL: When students come to SouledOut they experience the love of Jesus Christ through our leaders (we want each student to walk into a wall of love). • KEY QUESTION: “What students are around me right now?” • RULE OF THUMB: FIVE-FOOT Rule: Meet or greet every student that comes within five feet of you.
ENJOY the mountain Ski patrol is dedicated to helping skiers enjoy their mountain. Ideally, every action, word, greeting, and smile is geared toward the skiers’ mountain enjoyment. • KEY WORD: Fun • GOAL: When students come to SouledOut they have a great time. • KEY QUESTION: “Is there something I can do or say right now to help students enjoy their time at SouledOut?” • RULE OF THUMB: FIRST-RESPONSE Rule: Be the first to respond to a distraction, kids that appear lonely or kids that appear stagnant.
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GUIDE A guide’s job is to help the skiers...
EXPLORE the mountain Ski patrol is dedicated to helping skiers explore their mountain. Ideally, every action, word, greeting, and smile is geared toward the skiers’ mountain exploration. • KEY WORD: Challenge • GOAL: Students decide to take the next SouledOut lift to more challenging sections of SouledOut Mountain. • KEY QUESTION: “What is the next lift for this student?” • RULE OF THUMB: CHALLENGE Rule: Always challenge students to the next lift. Students desire, respond, and grow as the result of being challenged.
EXCEL on the mountain Ski patrol is dedicated to helping skiers excel on their mountain. Ideally, every action, word, greeting, and smile is geared toward the skiers’ excelling on the mountain. • KEY WORD: Transformation • GOAL: Our desire is that students, and their families would be transformed as a result of participating in SouledOut. • KEY QUESTION: “Which student is on my radar screen who God wants me to walk with?” • RULE OF THUMB: RADAR Rule: Connect, as a guide, with those students that God has brought into your radar screen.
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GUIDE Orbital Ski Guide Which student is on my radar screen...
S5
S3 S1
Leader
S2
S4
Journey Ski Guide ...who God wants me to walk with?
S4 S5 S1
L
L S3 S2
Hostile to Jesus
Seeking Jesus
Salvation
Growing Believer
Mature Believer
As a guide constantly challenge students to go steeper and deeper on the Ski Mountain. Steeper = COMMITMENT Deeper = MATURITY
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TEACH The Job of the ski instructor is to help students become proficient skiers/riders...
“[Jesus] answered, ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and all your mind…’” Luke 10:27a
HEART = DESIRE SOUL = EMOTION STRENGTH = PHYSICAL MIND = INTELLECTUAL We are teaching them to love God in every aspect of their life.
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HEART =
DESIRE Teach them to apply God’s Word to their CHOICES. Help your students to discover… • ...what they yearn for deep within their heart. • ...fulfillment in God alone.
SOUL =
EMOTION Teach them to process what they are FEELING. Help your students to explore… • ...what emotions they are experiencing by being confronted by the truth of God. • ...godly passions that God has placed in their lives.
STRENGTH =
PHYSICAL Teach them to worship God by their ACTIONS. Help your students find… • ...power to apply decisions through the power of the Holy Spirit. • ...accountablity by following up on decisions they’ve made; confirm with them that they are acting on these decisions.
MIND =
INTELLECTUAL Teach them to wrestle with God’s TRUTH. Help your students think… • Biblically so they develop a biblical worldview. • Relevantly so they discover how God’s truth relates to their everyday life and circumstances.
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FIRST AID A ski-patrol member’s job is to apply first aid when there is a medical emergency. While working with middle school students, we will face spiritual, relational, and emotional emergencies. 1.
THE EMERGENCY
“To help in an emergency, the bystander first has to notice that something is wrong.” —National Safety Council First Aid and CPR •
90% of communication is non-verbal.
•
Keep your “hurting kid radar” engaged. Watch for kids that are off by themselves, crying, downcast, or with a crowd of friends around them in tears. Listen for “red flag” answers in discussions.
2.
TO HELP
“The most important time to make the decision to help is before you ever encounter an emergency. Deciding to help is an attitude about people, about emergencies, and about one’s ability to deal with emergencies.” —National Safety Council First Aid and CPR •
It is far too easy to see someone hurting and walk away.
•
As leaders and as human beings, times of pain and hurt are opportunities for genuine growth because our hearts are engaged and we are desperate for love.
3.
THE EMS, IF NEEDED
“Laypersons frequently make inappropriate decisions concerning the EMS. They delay contacting the EMS until they are absolutely sure that an emergency exists…such actions can present significant dangers to victims.” —National Safety Council First Aid and CPR •
The WVC Student Ministries and Pastoral Care Staff is your SouledOut EMS (Emergency Medical Service).
•
Never be afraid to ask for help or to bring students to the staff when you suspect an issue is beyond your abilities or experience.
•
Examples: suicide, clinical depression, abuse, threats of harm to self or others (such as cutting), threatening behavior directed toward them, eating disorders, etc.
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4. ASSESS THE VICTIM
“The bystander must decide what life-threatening conditions exist and what kind of help a victim needs immediately. ” —National Safety Council First Aid and CPR A: Open the Get them talking and LISTEN! • Reflect back what they’re saying so they know you’re listening. •
As you listen, don’t interrupt, but keep in mind the three assessments.
B: Assess Ask yourself, “What life and courage does this child need BREATHED into them?” C: Assess Ask yourself, “Is this child depending on the BLOOD of Jesus Christ for strength?” D: Assess Ask yourself, “What FAULTY BELIEFS are disabling this child that need to be replaced by the truth of God?” 5. PROVIDE FIRST AID
“Often the most critical life-support measures are effective only if started immediately by the nearest available person. That person usually will be a layperson—a bystander.” —National Safety Council First Aid and CPR •
After you have listened and assessed the crisis, and after you are sure that the victim knows they have been heard, begin to offer simple, non-preachy advice based on your own experience and God’s word.
•
Offer spiritual first aid out of your ABCD assessment:
A: Open the Airway Even while offering advice, continue to listen! B: Advise Breathing Breath life and courage into this precious child of God. C: Advise Circulation Share how you have learned in your own life to depend upon the power available by the blood of Jesus Christ. D: Advise Disability Help them to identify faulty beliefs and suggest biblical truths to memorize and replace faulty beliefs. Post-Care Response: Follow up. Give them a call at home and check in regularly in the next weeks, months, and years.
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Picture the warmth of a ski lodge; good friends, comfy couches, hot chocolate, and a cozy warm fire.
How to build a relational fire students will be drawn to:
O2
Fire is a chemical reaction involving rapid oxidation or burning of a fuel. It needs three elements to occur:
FIRE TRIANGLE FUEL
SKILL #1 BUILD A WARM FIRE
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HEAT
O2
OXYGEN SUSTAINS COMBUSTION In building a relational fire with students, the oxygen is dependence upon the Holy Spirit. •
Fires breathe oxygen; remove oxygen and the fire suffocates. Our relational ability to connect with students suffocates without the sustaining dependence upon the Holy Spirit.
•
To build a comfortable relational fire with students;
stop and pray before and during any interaction.
FUEL
FUEL CAN BE ANY COMBUSTIBLE MATERIAL In building a relational fire with students, the fuel is middle school hearts. •
Fires need combustible material as fuel to burn. Our relational ability to connect with students will be in direct correlation to our willingness to step out and connect in their world.
•
To build a relational fire of comfort with students,
drop your comfort zone & get into their comfort zone.
HEAT
HEAT IS THE ENERGY NECESSARY TO INCREASE THE TEMPERATURE OF THE FUEL TO THE POINT THAT IGNITION OCCURS In building a relational fire, the heat is the intentional actions leaders initiate to increase the relational comfort level with students. •
Without sufficient heat, a fire cannot begin. Our relationships with students will not build into a fire unless we take intentional action to build up heat.
•
To build a relational fire of comfort with students,
roll into their world. • • • •
Remember their name. Outside of SouledOut gatherings Letters, cards, or notes Look for ways to serve them.
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Picture the openness around the fire;
It starts with jokes and stories and leads to sharing and honesty.
First, remember First Aid Training: A: Open the Airway Get them talking and listen. B: Assess Breathing Ask yourself, “What life and courage does this child need breathed into them?” C: Assess Circulation Ask yourself, “Is this child depending on the blood of Jesus Christ for strength?” D: Assess Disability Ask yourself, “What faulty beliefs are disabling this child that need to be replaced by the truth of God?”
SKILL #2 BUILD OPENNESS
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How to have a conversation with a middle school student: 1. Pray before the conversation and meeting. Pray that God will help you to be authentic and loving. Pray that He would open up the doors of communication. 2. Get them to talk about themselves. 3. Don’t underestimate small talk. 4. Jump on interests that you have in common. 5. Share information about yourself: your likes, dislikes and experiences. 6. Purposefully make eye contact as you talk. 7. Practice presenting a friendly face; not goofy, but natural and relaxed. 8. Pay close attention to what they say. Show that what they say is important. 9. Respect boundaries. Allow them to signal when you can delve into personal matters. 10. Be yourself. Don’t try to use their jargon to fit in.
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How to listen to a Teenager
1
1. Listen with your EARS.
Does the student know you hear them?
Stop talking and start listening. Ask questions that show you’re listening intensely. Don’t finish other people’s sentences or give them quick-fix answers.
2. Listen with your EYES. Can the student see you care?
When talking with students, are you guilty of looking around the room to find another person? Or looking at your watch, at your notes? Have you ever had a conversation with another person who focuses on the hotdog cart behind you instead of focusing on what you’re saying? It clearly communicates his hunger is more important than your heart. Don’t let your eyes betray you. Focus on the person you are with.
3. Listen with your FACE.
Does the student believe you are listening?
When students share their hearts, your facial expressions should match the impact of the words. It’s not good enough to have your face directed at a student, but be expressionless. Be real. When your students are excited, reflect their excitement back to them. When they’re hurting, show concern.
4. Listen with your MOUTH.
Can the student hear that you understood their heart?
Reflecting words and emotion is a skill. Reflecting is a counseling skill in which you repeat back what they have said in your own words so they know that you fully understood them.
5. Listen with your HANDS. Can the student sense you care?
Appropriate touch is similar to good eye contact in its ability to communicate care and concern. When it’s appropriate to give a hug, a high five, a pat on the shoulder, do it! Relational youth ministry requires that you connect with students at a level many of them don’t experience from the world. You may be the only one who shows them genuine interest and care that day.
1 “How to Listen to a Teenager” adapted from Your First Two Years in Youth Ministry by Doug Fields. Pg. 92-93.
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People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care
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Picture the dialogue around the fire;
people begin to discuss ideas, beliefs, and viewpoints.
SKILL #3 BUILD DISCUSSION
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How to lead an effective discussion:
1
1. Encourage your students to verbalize their views and feelings, however unorthodox those thoughts may be. Nothing stifles a discussion faster then when kids don’t feel safe to say what they feel. 2. Be grateful for every answer. Your job is to create a safe place for kids to say whatever they want—and be appreciated for it. 3. Don’t be satisfied with the first response to your question. Go deeper with a follow up question. Avoid a question-answer-question-answer pattern. Ask for several responses to your question, and then provoke the speakers to dialogue with each other. Move them from merely answering toward discussion or conversing—with each other, not just with you. Start the ball in this direction by asking, “Why do you think that?” and “What do the rest of you think?” 4. Keep the discussions moving. Notice the tempo, and when kids are starting to lose interest, quickly move to the next question. 5. Be alert to the individuals in your group. Be aware of what’s going on with your kids as they come to your small group. Don’t be afraid to focus on what needs to be, even if it’s not the ReMix question. 6. Don’t be afraid of silence. If it’s quiet, they are thinking. Let them break the silence. If your question gets no immediate response from a student, don’t feel like you have to jump in and answer it yourself. 7. Turn difficult questions back to the group (especially if you don’t know the answer). The toughest questions may be your biggest tool to get a lively discussion going. 8. Let your group self-correct its tangents. Don’t just tell the student that he or she is wrong—ask instead, “What do the rest of you think?” Chances are as students give their input, the group will correct itself. 9. Stay flexible to the group’s needs. Don’t be afraid to put aside your agenda for the week. Leading a small group requires the judgment to decide when an issue is sufficiently critical. 10. Be prepared to learn from your group. Your weekly preparation, as well as the students’ feedback, can profoundly influence your own spiritual development. 1 “How to Lead an Effective Discussion” adapted from Help, I’m a small Group Leader! By Laurie Polich.
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M I N I S T R Y
P A R T N E R
T R A I N I N G
souledout www.woodmenyouth.com
Ski Patrol Handbook Š2009 Brian Carlson Questions contact bcarlson@woodmenvalley.org