Brighter Spotlight

By Madeline Muller

We all know someone who’s effortlessly stylish. They always seem ahead of the trends, never look boring, and consistently pull off even the most daring fashion choices. We ask, “Were they born with it?” In Ssiala’s case, the answer is yes.

According to her, she “came out of the womb like, ‘Mom, where is the mascara? Where is the stage?’” So it’s no wonder she did pageantry all throughout her childhood and got into modeling in her later years. In college, she went a step further and discovered styling. But a creative mind like Ssiala’s can not be tied to something she doesn’t truly want to do, and after attending four different universities and switching her major multiple times, she concluded that college wasn’t for her.

“I felt that fashion school was slowing me down, and I wanted to do my own thing,” she said. She began to question society’s definition of a “great education,” and she found that there was no one answer. For Ssiala, the best education she could receive was a real-world experience, so she began to focus on building her own business instead. “College has always been something I’ve being trying to force and mold into my life. But it’s not something I can stick with, to be honest.” Of course, another huge factor that turned Ssiala’s life upside down and motivated her to leave school was her diagnosis.

In 2018, doctors diagnosed her with a very rare form of uterine cancer. Normally, this cancer derives from an ectopic pregnancy; however, Ssiala had never been pregnant. A variety of tests proved this, but, still, some people - even a few doctors - did not believe her. “I was shamed a lot.” Ssiala said. She hesitated to tell people what kind of cancer she had because even some family members met her with judgment. “It broke my heart,” she told Brighter. While some friends and family did fall off in this way, many gave her immense support.

“My mom was my rock,” Ssiala said. Her mom stopped going to work to take care of her. Her brother, who had recently passed, was a “trailblazer,” and his spirit constantly reminded her to keep going.

When asked about her role models, Ssiala thought about her 4-year-old niece Ka’loni. “She spoke so much life into me,” Ssiala commented. Ka’loni was constantly full of joy and energy, no matter what challenges life threw her way. Ka’loni would tell Ssiala how beautiful she was and compliment her bald head. “When I shaved my head, she said ‘You look so pretty. You look like a Barbie,’” Ssiala told us. She would describe how she wanted to go into fashion and have Ssiala as her model or her stylist. “My niece was somebody that I could touch and hear from and hold hands with… Instead of looking at [celebrities], I focused on my niece.” Ssiala said.

Like her niece urged her to do, Ssiala kept modeling through cancer. And to her surprise, she actually got more model bookings than ever before. “Of course, sometimes I was very sick, but you couldn’t always tell that, because I would just be strutting.” She learned that you really just have to have confidence, regardless of whatever you are going through. But Ssiala noted something else as well. “The beauty and fashion industry has some work to do,” she commented. She found it concerning that she was praised for her thinness and unique bald head when she was going through toxic treatments.

Ssiala connected with her love of fashion in a variety of ways throughout her cancer journey, as it allowed her to retain her sense of self. “If I really wasn’t feeling good that day, I would wear black on black or grey on grey,” Ssiala noted. She said, “ If my niece was there, I would wear all pink.” She loved this denim dress her mom gave her and donned it frequently for its port accessibility. Ssiala believes her unique style pushed her doctors to see her as a person and not just a patient. “[Cancer] can break your independence,” Ssiala told Brighter. But fashion helped her to not just maintain, but elevate these qualities. Even though sacrificing her independence often felt a weakness, Ssiala found strength in vulnerability, in being able to open up and lean on others. She said, “I learned that strength and femininity and being a woman doesn’t really have a definition.”

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After three different prescription treatments and a partial hysterectomy, Ssiala was officially declared cancer free on August 5th, 2020. But it’s never truly over. “When they say you are cancer free, that doesn’t really mean the cancer goes away and you can just ignore it. I tried to for a very long time, up until a few months ago…” she commented. She now has a new point of view. “I want to be a voice and a light. I want to tell my story not through a point of pain, but through a point of thriving, not just surviving,” she commented. She even changed her name from Tatyana-Aaliyah to Ssiala to embrace her new approach with greater conviction.

Ssiala sees the world differently now. Her mind has been opened in a way she never imagined pre-cancer. She grew up Christian, but cancer made her question the things she had learned. “I started to see life as this huge bundle of joy,” she commented. While she may not be the most religious person, Ssiala has become increasingly spiritual. “[This experience] gave me an insurmountable amount of faith in God.”

She had not just a spiritual awakening, but a personal one as well. She emphasized finding peace within yourself and not just things or other people, and knowing who you are in a crowd full of people. “I feel in tune with the natural world, and God, and myself,” Ssiala told Brighter.

Now, Ssiala hopes to spread her light. As Ssiala came through cancer, she struggled to find clothes that looked right, made her feel really good, and worked with the port. Taking fabric sensitivity into account created a whole new battle. So, she now wants to create those clothes for other women. She said, “Women of all walks of life and illnesses really do need to be represented.” She is also writing a poetry book to give hope to those struggling. The best part: it doubles as a coloring book.

Ssiala showed us at Brighter her unique energy and resilient spirit. She prefers to describe her journey as “coming” through cancer, rather than “going” through cancer. So as we all come through various holiday season and winter struggles, let’s try to take a page out of her book.

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