T he L iberal Synagogue E lstree
Hakol
March/April 2018 Adar/Nisan/Iyar 5778
BAR-/BAT-MITZVAH
KABBALAT TORAH
RABBI’S WORD – MARCH 2018
Rabbi Pete Tobias
T
his is a special edition of Hakol. It examines the theory and practice of bar- and bat-mitzvah ceremonies at The Liberal Synagogue Elstree. It comes at the end of an unprecedented number of such ceremonies: in the past six months 14 young people have celebrated this milestone in their Jewish lives. What, I wonder, are their abiding memories of that special occasion? On Saturday 31st May 2003, my eight-year stint at the Glasgow New Synagogue came to an end. The final Friday night service, which would normally be preceded by a meeting of the Bar-/Bat-Mitzvah class, I decided to do something different. During my time, 34 young people had celebrated becoming Bar- or Bat-Mitzvah. So I wrote to them all and invited them to a service and supper at the synagogue. I’m not sure how many I expected to show up. But I was pretty chuffed when 28 young people, ranging in age from the 13-year-old, whose Bar-Mitzvah ceremony had been a couple of weeks earlier, to the 20-year-old who’d been one of my first victims, appeared at the synagogue. I also had letters (remember them?) from four others who were at university and couldn’t make it. At a certain point of the evening, that 20-year-old stood up and gave a little speech. In it he said, to nods of agreement all round, that the teaching they had enjoyed (or perhaps he said endured) was very different to that offered to their contemporaries in Glasgow’s other shuls. I had not attempted to indoctrinate (his word) but rather to challenge and to encourage my students to ask questions about their heritage. And I’d also shown them lots of Monty Python clips... What would be the response, I wonder, were I to issue a similar invitation to those members of TLSE who have endured the same teaching (now formalised in a book, but still full of Python)? I would certainly be contacting more than 34 people – a quick trawl through the database and my memory suggests that over 180 young people have celebrated becoming Bar- or Bat-Mitzvah on my watch! Almost half of those have gone on to study Kabbalat Torah, which also features in this edition of Hakol. What are their memories? And what of those who, like me, walked away from their synagogue as soon as their Bar- or Bat-Mitzvah celebration was over? Many questions about the significance of these coming of age ceremonies. Please read – and respond!
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TABLE OF CONTENTS Rabbi’s Word Co-Chair’s Word A Word from our Bar-/Bat-Mitzvah Tutor A Congregant’s View on B’nei Mitzvah Lunch Club Information Feedback from parents of recent B’nei Mitzvah My Plans for Teaching the KT Class Our Family’s Experience of the Bar Mitzvah Experience at TLSE Thoughts on Our Son’s Bar Mitzvah Experience at TLSE Upcoming Walks Welcome to our New Caretaker! Reflections on Kaballat Torah – Young Adults’ Perspectives Welcome to New Members Care and Welfare Page TLSE Contact Details
Rabbi Pete Tobias Lizzie Rabin Sharon Kaye
Page 2 Page 4 Page 5
Tina Shaw
Page 6 Page 7 Page 8
Brigid Hekster; Dani Zur Louise Green Mike Walton Lucy Isaacs
Page 9 Page 10
Marc Perilly
Page 12
Page 13 Page 14 Tom Savage; Adam Steinberg; Page 15 Nathaniel Samson Page 17 Page 18 Page 19
Table of Contents* *Items highlighted yellow are regular features
WELCOME TO THIS EDITION
Deborah Gabbay
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s you can see from the cover and Rabbi Pete’s Word opposite, this edition of Hakol is all about having a Bar or Bat Mitzvah ceremony at TLSE, and also about the Kabbalat Torah ceremony that should follow on from it at the age of 14 or 15. Considering how many B’nei Mitzvah have taken place at TLSE over the last two or three years, the number of KT participants is sad indeed! It is hoped that the articles herein, particularly those on pages 15-17, will perhaps inspire young people at TLSE to join the course. This year’s has yet to begin. There is still time for those who celebrated their Bar or Bat Mitzvah last year to decide to give it a try. Clearly, it has a profound impact on those who do participate and although it involves a commitment, and doesn’t usually result in quite such a huge party as the Bar or Bat Mitzvah ceremony, those I have spoken to who have experienced it have only good things to say about it. We hope that all those who are approaching both their Bar or Bat Mitzvah year, or that of KT, will find this edition of Hakol useful and inspiring. 3
CO-CHAIR’S WORD
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Lizzie Rabin
ith the theme of this Hakol being Bar/Bat Mitzvah and KT, I thought I would share the Rabin family’s experiences since over the last five years my children Joshua and Chloe have both studied and celebrated their B’nei Mitzvah at TLSE as well as participated in KT. They both joined TLSE Religion School aged five and have grown up within the TLSE community. They have numerous other priorities – including music and sport – but we always ensured that they found the appropriate time to commit to Josh Rabin’s Bar-Mitzvah understanding their Jewish heritage and following their Jewish studies. During their time throughout Cheder they made great friends from outside of school – and in fact the Chloe and Molly (Wingate) double act on Yom Kippur almost became as legendary as the KT trip to Berlin. They both found the mixture of learning Hebrew, combined with the social aspects of mixing with other young people very rewarding. Joshua now helps at Cheder and Chloe would if it wasn’t for the fact she is usually running around a netball court on a Sunday morning. They both value the support that Rabbi Pete has brought to their studies – including the studying of his book Never Mind the Bullocks.
The winning team.
Chloe Rabin’s Bat-Mitzvah
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Their Bar/Bat Mitzvah services were really great experiences for our entire family – including the large contingency of non-Jewish people who attended the services. For Joshua and Chloe, it was definitely more pleasurable attending B’nei Mitzvah at TLSE compared to the numerous United services they attended in order to support their friends going through the same experience. Not only is the TLSE service relatively short –but it is also partly in English – so you can actually understand what is going on! As a family we got a huge amount out of the entire experience, though we really did have to commit to the process – even if that meant changing our Friday night arrangements and working around sporting commitments. We usually spend Friday night at my in-laws – but once a month – as part of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah program we would come to TLSE –together with my in-laws to ensure we were fully a part of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah family. And often you would spot Joshua in Shul in rugby kit and Chloe dressed for netball!
Personally, I wouldn’t have done it any other way. My recommendations for anyone going through or about to go through the process is – commit to TLSE and Rabbi Pete as much as you can and then hopefully you will look back with the same fond memories as we do today. Good luck and enjoy!
Josh with his KT group after the KT service 2015
Chloe’s KT group
A WORD FROM OUR BAR-/BAT-MITZVAH HEBREW TUTOR Sharon Kaye
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have been teaching at the Religion School for 31 years, and for about the last 15 have taught the Bar-/Bat Mitzvah class the Hebrew required for them to be called up to read from the Torah at their Bar/Bat Mitzah service. As a mother of three sons who showed little interest in learning anything until well after they finished Uni, I know only too well that children of 12-13 are at a most difficult age to inspire. As they move to secondary school they have increased pressures with new subjects and homework. Many of them join knowing little or no Hebrew and appear to have reluctantly agreed to have a Bar-Mitzvah because everyone else is having one and they don't want to miss out on the celebration party. However, it is a huge deal for a child of that age to go up on the bimah in front of all their family and friends and read and sing in an unfamiliar language with confidence - many suffer nerves and anxiety. Whilst teaching them to decode the Hebrew alphabet and vowels (absolutely no phonetics!) my job is to coax the best out of every child, to assess their individual ability, encourage them to reach their potential and to try to instil a sense of pride in their achievements. Over the years, I have taught children of all abilities, some having learning disabilities and autism. No words can express the pride I feel watching them all as they read their portion from the Torah on the day. Mazel-Tov to all. 6
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A CONGREGANT’S WORD FROM OUR VIEW BAR-/BAT-MITZVAH ON B’NEI MITZVAH HEBREW TUTOR Tina Shaw
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s a regular attendee at Shabbat morning services, I have been experiencing the recent run of B’nei-Mitzvah with mixed emotions. They are both a blessing and a curse. They vary enormously: in size – anything from 20 to 120 guests, dressed fashionably – suits, hats and six-inch heels – or everyday casual and no ties, and attentiveness – everyone joining in, to disrespectful chattering. People should be individual and there is absolutely nothing wrong with families choosing to celebrate this important lifecycle event in their own way. I enjoy people-watching and many B’nei Mitzvah give me great pleasure, be they large or small. I particularly like to see the smiles of pride on the faces of family members when the youngster, especially if they are clearly appropriately nervous, successfully reaches the end of their portion, possibly concluding with an audible sigh of relief. I like listening to the young person’s interpretation of their portion, especially if they are able to inject some personal element that has meaning for them. I like that magic moment when they stand on the bimah with their family and read out the prayer of thanks. I don’t go much on the sweet throwing, or the occasional clapping, but at least it shows the congregation is involved and enjoying themselves. Those are some of the positives. Here are a few of the negatives: There is the feeling of the shul being taken over (not helped by the lack of regular congregants). There is the lack of respect shown by some of the guests, who either don’t deign to wear a tallit, don’t bother to follow the service in the siddur, or chatter throughout. It’s a very long time since I attended an Orthodox service, so I have no idea how prevalent chattering is these days, but it has reached an excessive level at several of our recent B’nei Mitzvah, resulting in Rabbi Pete having to ask people to be quiet, and on one occasion, asking a group of children to leave. I understand that if you are a 12- year-old attending a Jewish school, you are likely to be on a regular Bar-Mitzvah trail, which may well be tedious, but this is no excuse, and adds to my grave doubts about the value of Jewish schools (but that’s another story). I found this whole incident profoundly shameful. It’s not all ‘doom and gloom’. Twice recently, I have spoken to guests who have never experienced a Liberal service before. The first was a woman from a local Orthodox congregation, whom I suspect hardly ever goes to shul. She was clearly pleasantly surprised by the whole proceedings and, whilst I am sure she would never consider joining us, she is now more likely to speak positively about Liberal Judaism. The second was a man who regularly attends a small Orthodox congregation in North London. He came in with an open mind, asked if he could wear his tallit, and spoke to me at the Kiddush, saying how much he had enjoyed the service. For me, such visitors make it all worth it. I am glad we are having lots of B’nei Mitzvah. It suggests that Judaism, especially Liberal Judaism, has a future, but I am secretly looking forward to the next occasion when the usual 20 of us will turn up 6for a peaceful regular Shabbat service.
LUNCH
CLUB
Enjoy a great lunch! Make new friends! Be entertained! Venue: The Synagogue Time: 1pm TLSE members: £5 Non-Members: £6
Tuesday 27 March
Kristan Payne Explains what it does and who uses it Tuesday 24 April
If you are coming, please contact Shirley Tel: 020 8953 0416 or email: shirleybatley@gmail.com
FEEDBACK ON THE BAR-MITZVAH SERVICE AT TLSE
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rigid Hekster, mother of Nathan, whose Bar-Mitzvah ceremony took place last November, wrote to Rabbi Pete afterwards:
“Now that we have come back down to earth, we just wanted to thank you again for all your coaching and support to get Nathan ready for his Bar-Mitzvah ceremony. It was a very special day and we thought you would like to know that we had numerous comments from different guests about how much they had valued and enjoyed your sermon and the whole approach to the service with the booklet, which helped everyone feel included. As my Mum’s partner said:
Nathan reading from the scroll
‘It was the first time I have attended a service in a synagogue and it was most thoughtful of you to produce the running order and explanation which made a huge difference to my understanding. I found one or two sections moved me which says something coming from a non-believer.’ It will be Aden’s turn soon and we look forward to seeing what his process will be like. In the meantime we just wanted to send you a couple of pictures taken by our lovely photographer, Juliana.” Eva Zur celebrated her Bat-Mitzvah in January. Her mum Dani said: “Just to say a huge thanks for all the help and support we received throughout the run up to and during Eva's Bat-Mitzvah on Saturday. It was absolutely amazing. I think Rabbi Pete has converted quite a few members of our family to the Liberal view point! Looking forward to Eva continuing her TLSE journey in the KT group.”
Eva’s party
Louise Green, the mother of Miles, who celebrated becoming Bar-Mitzvah on 3rd February, wrote this: I’d like to let Rabbi Pete know that I thought his service was absolutely wonderful. I was so moved and, although not extremely religious, I felt his words resonated with me. I loved the guitar playing and I wanted to let him know that all our guests said what an amazing service he did and a few of our friends that have different religions were raving about him and his words, long into the afternoon over afternoon tea at our house! They absolutely loved it. He really did make such an impression and connected with so many people. 8
Miles on the Bimah
Editor’s Note: You can read Lucy Isaacs’ experience of shepherding a child through the Bar Mitzvah journey on page 10 and that of the family of Louis Perilly on page 12
MY PLANS FOR TEACHING THE KT CLASS
Mike Walton
What can be said about this object and what can it tell you about how we teach the KT students?
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lease take some time to look at these images, thinking about what you can see1. To guide your thought process here are some questions: What is the object? What materials is it made from? How much time has been taken over it? How skilfully has it been done? Who might have owned an object like this? Who do you think made it? Can we say anything about the wealth or social status of the owner or maker?
Try and come up with a narrative that supports your ideas and observations. If you are feeling particularly keen you might like to make a note of your answers to see how close you get to the story behind these pictures when I reveal it in the next issue of Hakol. Last year I attended a week-long teachers’ training programme run by an organisation called Facing History and Ourselves. Their mission to “help students learn about hatred and bigotry so they can stop them from happening in the future” speaks for itself. They provide extraordinary content and resource to help realise this aim. Suitably inspired, in my own small way, I am now a “watcher of the sky2” and the KT students are the stars. 1The images are taken from a lesson plan “Authentic Encounters” produced by the UCL Centre for Holocaust Education. 2A reference for those who attended the Holocaust Memorial Service. An explanation for everyone in future.
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OUR FAMILY'S BAR-MITZVAH EXPERIENCE
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Lucy Isaacs
riday nights are exceptionally important to me. As a child, Friday night dinner was the best part of the week, alternated between my grandparents’ houses, a chance to see my extended family come together, good food and lots of inclusive conversation. My brother and I looked forward to it. Later, my mother picked up the baton and then it was my turn to take the reins. Even though life had changed – divorced parents and family living outside London, I wanted to hang on to it. It was something that without putting in the effort, would easily be forgotten and I wanted to make sure my children still had the 'Friday night feeling' that I grew up with. After all, isn't that what 'tradition' is all about? So even today, I'm happy to say, Friday nights and High Holy Days are just as important as they were 40 years ago. Mike at 3 We still eat the same meal, use the same candle sticks, and drink from the same kiddush cup... and there is something incredibly comforting in that. So for me, Jed having a Bar-Mitzvah ceremony was a given, not even to be discussed. It was part of the tradition that we wanted to repeat as part of our family heritage. It's an amazing occasion, to stop and fondly look back over the past 13 years of memories, as well as gathering family and friends together to celebrate a happy occasion rather than a sad one. To Jed, it was important to celebrate his Bar-Mitzvah, for him being Jed leads the lighting of the shabbat candles part of a Jewish community feels familiar and comforting. He enjoys continuing the Jewish family traditions. He joined the Jewish society at his school and often is out during break times promoting it to others.
Jed reads his thanks
Rabbi Pete married Ben and me in March 2016. TLSE seemed the perfect Shul for us to begin our new journey together as Ben had his Bar-Mitzvah ceremony there in 1993. I always enjoy the services with Rabbi Pete, from Friday nights, to High Holy days and all in between. I find them so peaceful and enjoyable, and sometimes quite emotional too. Both my boys have a good relationship with the Shul and they feel very comfortable at TLSE. Nevertheless, I respect Jed’s father’s United traditions and assumed that Jed would have his Bar-Mitzvah ceremony in the same Shul as his father and grandfather.
To my surprise his dad suggested that perhaps Jed would feel more comfortable with Rabbi Pete’s programme, especially since prior to January 2017, despite our family traditions, Jed had never read a word of Hebrew in his life! One of the Shabbat tables
Jed started the Bar-Mitzvah programme at the beginning of 2017. He enjoyed Rabbi Pete’s Jewish history classes and from July also had weekly tutorials with Sharon Kaye, who taught him Hebrew from scratch. 10
Rabbi Pete leads the shabbat service
Mike at 3 Jed and Lucy after the service
He was so nervous and a little overwhelmed at his first lesson. He'd just started senior school and was settling in and making new friends, and now another new challenge. Sharon had a great way of introducing him to the Hebrew letters and sounds and after learning the basics, he was soon reading. Each week he'd focus on a new line of his portion and within a few months, he'd read it all. Now it was time to practise and practise and practise! For the celebration itself, we asked Rabbi Pete to conduct a service the night before, and it was the perfect way to start the weekend. Having the service followed by a Shabbat dinner meant the world to me and my family. The room looked so special, the table centres were focused on each family having their own Shabbat candles, Cholla and kiddush wine so that each table could simultaneously focus on bringing in Shabbat, coming together as family and friends, and carrying out traditions that we all usually do in our own homes, now creating our own little community. The room of 50 felt very intimate, so much warmth and support from our family and closest friends. At the end of the Bar-Mitzvah service, Rabbi Pete emphasised the continuation of Jed’s Jewish education through the KT course, which I agree is very important. I think Jed will be inclined to join the course if he has friends who will also participate. Asked afterwards about the experience of the Bar-Mitzvah ceremony, Jed said: "It was amazing. Better than I expected.” Our whole family enjoyed it and I hope Jed continues on to do the KT course. Jed’s father Andrew is not a member of TLSE and many of his family had not experienced a Bar Mitzvah service at a Liberal shul before, as he sent to Rabbi Pete below: “I had people coming up to me all weekend telling me how lovely the Friday night service and dinner was, the lunch after the service, and of course the mega party in the evening. But the most heart-warming comments were about the service that you made happen. My family and I all grew up going to celebrations at Orthodox synagogues, and wow what a contrast…. Jed's service was full of warmth, humour and love… The atmosphere you created in your synagogue totally relaxed Jed's nerves (what little he had) and helped the entire family to enjoy the day. Thanks so much for making such an important occasion so special for all of us.”
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THOUGHTS ON OUR SON’S BAR-MITZVAH AT TLSE
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t began a year ahead of time, with a meeting with Rabbi Pete at TLSE, where we discovered that Louis’ Bar-Mitzvah ceremony would actually fall on his birthday. Rabbi Pete explained the process of both learning for Bar-Mitzvah and the real meaning of it to us. At our next meeting Louis received his portion. The following months flew past – I can’t remember a year that passed so quickly – filled with weekend lessons for Louis at TLSE under the patient guidance of Rabbi Pete and Sharon, who tutored Louis. Lara and I sometimes attended services with him which was rather enjoyable. It is daunting and overwhelming for a boy to learn his portion and most stand on the bimah with nervous anticipation and fear. I remember my own in an orthodox shul but both times and I have changed, and the ethos of TSLE reflects and embraces this, so I felt that although it would be the same, it would also be different and better for my son. But at the rehearsal a few days before the ceremony, we looked at our son, smiled and asked if he was feeling ready.
Marc Perilly
A first look at the scroll
A first look at the scroll
He shrugged his shoulders and shed some tears. Rabbi Pete seeing the shock on our faces, spoke with Louis and we made another appointment. Rabbi Pete had arranged for a couple of other boys to be there. Instead of Louis reading his portion to us, Rabbi Pete produced a book of Jewish jokes and asked Louis to read the first one at the microphone on the bimah. After a while, Louis picked himself up and read it. We all laughed. It broke the ice and made Louis realise it wasn't that bad. That sums up Rabbi Pete: Not just a Rabbi, but an author, a musician, a comedian of sorts, a myriad of talents, but mainly a humble and caring man.
Marc and Lara asfter the service
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On his big day, our son read his portion eloquently, loudly and proudly. It was a deeply moving and spiritual experience. All our fears, concerns and worries vanished and were replaced with nothing but warmth and love. And you will find nothing but support, warmth, humour, knowledge and understanding at TLSE.
Judaism can follow many paths; we like the one we are on at TSLE. Come and be part of it, you won't be disappointed. Editor’s Note: Below is an extract from an email Marc sent to Rabbi Pete after the event: Louis and his brother
A relieved and happy Louis after the service
“We are still recovering from the euphoria of the weekend. We wanted to say 'thank you' for your support, guidance, patience and care with Louis. He blew us away in Shul and we are deeply grateful for everything you have done. We also wanted you to know that many of our guests were either from different faiths or otherwise orthodox synagogues and they ALL remarked that they found the service interesting, friendly and enjoyable and some were fascinated by you and your guitar! They really came away from there with some understanding and a smile.” Marc also extended his thanks to those behind the scenes, such as the caretaker, security guards, administrative staff and volunteers whose often unnoticed work is crucial to the whole process – thank you Marc, it is nice to be acknowledged and appreciated!
Upcoming Walks Date: Saturday 17th March Time: 2.15 for 2:30pm Meet: Tina and Michael Shaw’s house: 4 Little Acre, St Albans, AL3 5SG; about three miles around Batchwood and back to tea. Mobile on the day: 01727 862788 Date: Saturday 28th April Time: 2:00 for 2:15pm Meet: Woodfield Road, Radlett, close to the junction with Letchmore Road for a walk around the local countryside; everyone invited back to Ann Etkind’s house afterwards for tea. Mobile on the day: 07751 620626
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WELCOME TO THE NEW CARETAKER - Stacey Greenberg
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fter several very challenging months in which we have been managing without the services of a caretaker, we are pleased to welcome Stacey Greenberg to TLSE. As someone with a Jewish background, Stacey has a good understanding of what she is coming in to, and has already displayed the initiative and enthusiasm we have been looking for, taking it upon herself to wash out the interior of the kitchen bin and hefting tables and chairs around with aplomb. Stacey has lived locally in Borehamwood all her life, raising her two sons and spending several years as a Nursery Nurse at the Rexton Nursery. She is a self-starter, who likes to keep busy and is as delighted to be here with us as we are to have her. She will be here for Friday evening and Saturday morning services, as well as during Religion School and festival and other activities. Please do say hello and welcome her in to our community.
Zak, Connor and Jasper
If you need to reserve a disabled parking space or to contact Stacey for any other reason please contact her on her mobile: 07946 629769 or email her at staceygreenberg63@gmail.com
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MY EXPERIENCE OF KT
Tom Savage
I
took part in the Kabbalat Torah course in 2011/12 after having my Bar-Mitzvah ceremony in the summer of 2011. It was an unbelievable experience and I really enjoyed the course and learning more about my Jewish heritage. I did the courses with Sophie Cooper, Sophie Posner, Bradley Bishop, Josh Marcus, Harry Goodman and Adam Steinberg, with Rabbi Pete and Alice Tibble leading the course. We had a KT meeting once a month, which was the key time for discussion on our Jewish history. These meetings culminated in the KT service, which was on the environment and climate change. It was such a funny and enjoyable journey, with many highs and lows that allowed me to make friends for life. My favourite part of the course was obviously the legendary Berlin trip and our visit to the Berlin wall. Especially the time when I got stuck in a lift, which was a harrowing experience. My least favourite part had to be waking up extremely early to get to the synagogue for our flight to Berlin. I could not recommend KT enough, there is nothing else quite like it. It was a year that I will never forget and it really added to my time with TLSE.
Adam Steinberg
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The 2012 KT group with Tom standing second from the left standing and Adam wearing a cap sitting in front of him
he KT course is very much the 'rite of passage' for young Liberal Jews, and it has been ever since its inception. It is a lifechanging experience, taking place over the course of a year, but having an effect that lasts forever. I highly recommend any young person to take part, to learn more about not just their heritage, but also themselves. It's a chance to become a true member of our synagogue's community, and to contribute to its ongoing history. Our KT group had a better gender balance than had been seen in a while. I particularly remember us participating in the annual Shul Supper Quiz: not because our team did well, (quite the opposite in fact!), but the team spirit made it a good, memorable evening, in spite of our poor performance - without that evening, I'm sure we would never have grown so close as a group. And of course, who could ever forget their own brand of the Almost Legendary KT Trip to Berlin? 15
The amount of content packed into the two-day trip is frankly astounding, which I would encourage any young member of the synagogue to experience. The juxtaposition between sitting in some random German cafe enjoying some local 'delicacies', then walking just a couple of blocks into the largest Holocaust Memorial in the world, is beyond words. It's a confusing mix of emotions over the short period of time, such as Tom, who had a phobia of lifts, getting stuck in a lift going up a single storey, a random band playing in our train carriage, and the slightly bizarre double-decker trains. There's just so much that we did and saw, I'm sure that my experiences have influenced the course of my life since. The theme of our KT service was not all that surprising, and I suspect many groups over the years have done something similar. As with a large proportion of today's young people, we were worried about the possible impacts of climate change, and how it's influencing the world around us. It's scary, as we can't control it, and we need effort on the scale of countries to make any real difference. What can a group of 15-year-olds possibly hope to achieve? It was KT that helped me to understand that small groups are exactly who we need to act: we might not change the world, or our country, our city, or even our street, but we can make a difference inside our own homes. And if we all do this, then the result is obvious, and we have been totally successful. When I became Bar-Mitzvah, I went from child to adult. But when I did KT, I learned what I could do with this adulthood. I learned that I can make a difference, and how I can do it. I learned that as a group, we can achieve so much more than we can as individuals. And perhaps most importantly, I learned the true nature of Soylent Green (which I won't spoil for you here, don't worry). And of course, maybe you can finally find out why the Berlin Trip has been 'Almost' Legendary for so, so many years.
Nathaniel Samson
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t's already been a decade since I did my KT, and I remember being keen to take part for a couple of reasons. Naturally, the (absolutely legendary!) Berlin trip was a big part of this, but also to keep in contact with Shul and develop my personal understanding of Jewishness beyond what I absorbed while (nervously) reading aloud from the Torah for my Barmitzvah. The group I participated with doubled up with NPLJ for the trip. TLSE’s Asher Kenton was my Berlin roommate - a room which I remember Pete describing fairly as 'smelling of teenage boy' when waking us up. The trip to Berlin had a big impact on me, including the debates we had about the suitability of the expansive 'Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe' and observing the scars of the Berlin Wall, whose path is still marked throughout the city. I remember Pete being astonished that none of this inaugural KT group had even been born by the time the Wall fell!
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I've since been back to Berlin another three times, and always make an effort to look out for the understated brass plaques on the ground that record Berlin's lost Jewish residents and their fates. These vary from the hopeful notes of emigration to the forcefully stark 'ermordet in Auschwitz'. As they are found simply and melancholically outside shops and laundrettes, they remind us of how Berlin's Jewish community lived, fully embedded within everyday German life, and how Nathaniel standing second from the left with his KT group quickly such a community can be extinguished. We also explored sites significant to the development of Liberal Judaism, which connected up directly to our study of contemporary Jewishness as part of KT, from discussion of the symbols we use to the importance of questioning traditions and rituals - not to debunk, but to more fully understand their significance. Memorably, asking questions is itself written into the Passover service (as the youngest in my family, this naturally fell to me!), and KT really provides the opportunity to do this. So by the time we reached our KT Service (which I believe was themed around Make Poverty History, in the year of Live 8), our experience and knowledge of what it is to be Jewish, and how it squares for a teenager within contemporary society, had grown significantly. That, and sampling all the sauerkraut!
WELCOME TO NEW MEMBERS
Jason Shoffman and Simone Golumb
Katie Matalon and Jonathan Kaye
Rob and Michelle Davis and their daughters Jessica and Ariella
Sammy Jacobs and his son Adam.
Sheldon and Sue Flax
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CONDOLENCES TO: Daniel Owide on the loss of his father. Marcus Smullen on the loss of his father. Nick Belkin on the loss of his mother. To the family of Betty Saktreger who has passed away.
PESACH ANNOUNCEMENT
Carol Hurst
If any one requires home hospitality or can offer transport for Pesach, please contact Carol Hurst
Do you wish you had a job that made a real difference?
Jewish Care employs 1,300 people who work in 350 different roles. They are currently recruiting. Are you or anyone you know interested in a job with Jewish Care? Please look at doyouwish.org or contact their recruitment team on 020 8922 2446
MAZEL TOV TO :
AND MAZEL TOV TO:
Nicky and Neil Starkowitz on the birth of their daughter, Talya Pippa. Also to grandparents Estelle and Stephen Leigh. Congratulations to Maxim Samson on obtaining his PHD degree from the University of Leeds in Political Geography.
Brayden Fifer on the occasion of his Bar Mitzvah
GET WELL SOON: Rita Arno who has been unwell recently and we hope she is getting better now. We wish Gayle McCombe a speedy recovery after her recent surgery. Dena Glass after her recent hospital stay. We hope that Irene Marcus will have a speedy recovery after breaking her hip Get well soon to Alan Gordonfelt after his recent surgery
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO: Molly Berger, Isaac Cyzer, Renee Cyzer, Talia Jones, Leon Leighton, Zakary Levy, Jasper Morton, Olivia Ornstein and Ella Stevens.
CARE & WELFARE COMMITTEE
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A-B
BARBARA
020 8953 1369
N-Q
PETER
020 8953 1369
C-F
LEONE
07702 349350
R-S
RITA
020 8953 4439
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GENERAL INFORMATION Elstree High Street Elstree, Hertfordshire WD6 3EY Phone: 020 8953 8889 Email: office@tlse.org.uk www.tlse.org.uk Edited by Deborah Gabbay
T he L iberal Synagogue E lstree
Please note: Deborah is generally in the office on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday from 10:00am – 4:00pm. Would all those involved in arranging functions, services or meetings please contact the office on 020 8953 8889 or office@tlse.org.uk so that they can be scheduled in the Synagogue diary. This ensures that any physical set-ups in the Synagogue are arranged and that meetings do not conflict. Whilst every effort is made to ensure that details printed in Hakol are correct, no responsibility can be accepted for information misprinted or incorrectly given to the Editor. Please let the Editor know of any errors or corrections. The Editor reserves the right to edit material submitted for publication. The deadline for submissions to the next edition of Hakol is Friday 13th April but submissions will be accepted at any time and early submission is appreciated.
COUNCIL MEMBERS’ CONTACT LIST CO-CHAIRMAN Lizzie Rabin 07974 229607 lizzie.rabin2702@gmail.com
CO-CHAIRMAN Richard Boulton 07801 921218 rboulton@gmail.com
HONORARY TREASURER Harvey Adams 07760 666002 frinton43@outlook.com
HONORARY PRESIDENT Monique Blake 020 8953 4251 monique.david@ntlworld.com
Penny Beral 07979 800616 penny@pennyberal.co.uk
Jacqueline Bernard 07885 176417 goonergirly@live.co.uk
Peter Rabin Joanne Jones 020 8958 7783 07958 300247 joanne.jones2304@gmail.com peterrabin@talktalk.net Designed & Printed by
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Alan Gordonfelt 020 8950 6048 ritalan@hotmail.co.uk David Swarc 07767 788596 davidswarc@aol.com
020 8449 6688 www.brunswickpress.co.uk 19
THE FOLLOWING IS AN EXTRACT FROM A ‘SERMON' RABBI PETE GAVE SEVERAL YEARS AGO TO BE SUNG TO THE TUNES OF SONGS FROM ‘JOSEPH & HIS TECHNICOLOR DREAMCOAT’ 1)
Shabbat morning class was awful but what made it worse Were some of the things the rabbi read chapter and verse: ‘Sing praises to our God on high, Creator of the world Bestowing love and blessings upon every boy and girl Who gave us divine teaching which we read from every week And hear about some dietary laws and sacrificing sheep.’ This is not the kind of thing the children want to hear They rather wished the rabbi and his words would disappear ‘The prayers we say are ancient words expressing doubt & fear Of forces oh so powerful, which we ought to revere They try to help us recognise how fortunate we are To live upon this planet orbiting a minor star.’ The rabbi read and sang and prayed and struggled to explain The purpose of this Jewish stuff – but it was all in vain The kids sat impatiently next to their parents in shul And most agreed they didn’t really get this stuff at all. The purpose of our sitting here is a means to an end For bar-/bat-mitzvah to occur he says we must attend. The accuracy of his words we really do not know But once we’ve had our special day, it will be time to go. 2)
Once the bar-mitzvah is o’er, most of them head for the door Rabbi I’ve really had enough – I can’t take any more of this stuff. 3)
Close up your ears to me, you won’t listen to me Nothing I say can persuade you to stay You got to the special age, read from the sacred page But now that it’s finished you’ll be on your way And I will be left, completely bereft With this knowledge and wisdom that you’ll never hear Just turn away from me, enjoy your liberty We live in an age where we all have a choice Our age-old religion with its ancient opinions Tries to persuade us to hear our God’s voice But now you will leave, ‘cause you just can’t believe All the things that you’ve studied are somehow divine But listen to me, please stay for KT It will all become clear if you give it more time. 4)
I’ve turned around – I have decided (a-ah) what I derided (a-ah) might just be true I can go on, so I’m returning (a-ah) to go on learning (a-ah) – I’m a Liberal Jew I turned 13, I’m celebrating (a-ah) and I was waiting (a-ah) till this was through But I realise after bar-mitzvah (a-ah) comes Kabbalat Torah (a-ah) – I’m a Liberal Jew No crash of drums, no flash of light, just a sense of wrong and right I realise that my heritage is about how humans grow: Life is a quest, a search for meaning, (a-ah) our role is gleaning (a-ah) ancestors’ views Take what endures, reject what’s dated (a-ah) love what’s created: (a-ah) We’re all Liberal Jews. The songs (In case you want to sing them) This is our heritage, our Liberal Jewish faith. 1) Joseph’s dreams, 2) End of Potiphar’s song (1st line: “Letting out a mighty roar…’) This is our heritage, our Liberal Jewish faith! 3) Close Every Door to Me, 4) Any Dream Will Do.