EU Trainee Bible BRUSSELSBRIEF.EU
Contents
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WELCOME ALL ABOUT THE CREDITS Welcome to the EU Trainee Bible and an introduction to Brussels Brief, the EU’s freshest weekly digest explaining the EU.
BEFORE YOUR TRAINEESHIP PREPARING & WONDERING Where do I live, breathe? Where am I? What is an EU? Answers to the elementary questions, covered.
DURING YOUR TRAINEESHIP BEHAVING AND PLAYING How do I act? What do I say? What do I do? Making the most of your traineeship both in and out of the office.
AFTER YOUR TRAINEESHIP DEVELOPING & THRIVING What’s my life’s purpose? How can I get on the gravy train? You get one shot at the Eurobubble...Mom’s spaghetti.
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Welcome Hello, Hola, Bonjour, Blá, Hallo, Hej, Guten Tag, Tere, Ciao, Здравейте, Jó Napot, Sveiki, Γεια σας, Bok, Ahoj, Moïen, Hei, Hallå, Cześć, Salut, Živjo, Congratulations for making it to your EU traineeship (and through that greeting). Whether you are fresh out of your European Studies bachelors / masters or looking for a way of getting a taste of the gravy train life of a Eurocrat, you have done well in overcoming the notoriously difficult selection process and wonderfully convoluted red tape to confirm your place among the EU institutions in the next few months. “The Bubble”, as it is often referred to, is a place of European diversity, of people coming together to work for, in and around the EU. You will experience what this is all about as you meet other trainees, colleagues, heads of units and more. Be ready to get your conversation skills up and running because the multitude of languages spoken here is impressive. You are one of over 900 people who will undergo a traineeship in the Commission along with some 300 Schuman Parliament trainees, not to mention the Council and Committee trainees, NGO’s, PermReps and many more. Rest assured, your unit and the European Quarter will certainly be ready to host you. You, on the other hand, may not be so ready. Several hundreds of you will be scavenging to open bank accounts, register your residence and maybe even find a home. But don’t panic. To get you started, we at Brussels Brief bring you our indispensable insider tips to give you a head start on your traineeship. We hope you’ll enjoy your time here and maybe even get a job out of it...? Bonne Chance! The Brussels Brief Team
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What is Brussels Brief? Brussels Brief is a weekly newsletter about the EU and European politics. It is no secret that we live in an age of news and media saturation and fake news. This is why we made Brussels Brief with our own millennial generation in mind, keeping things informative but infused with a healthy sense of humour and bringing a myriad of perspectives. Every week we provide an ‘executive summary’ so you can stay in the loop with the most important and interesting stories of the week in European politics in a fresh, concise and irreverent newsletter. It only takes 5 min to read so why not try it out - you can sign up here. On top of that, with all trainees in mind, we made the ‘EU Trainee Bible’ to provide the fraternal advice we needed but wasn’t available to us at the time of our own traineeships. Following on from the success of our previous edition, we decided to update our ‘EU Trainee Bible’. Combined we have experience from all the major institutions, so we hope our experiences can be of help to you no matter where you’ll be. You can subscribe to Brussels Brief here, like us on Facebook or follow us on Twitter and Instagram. We hope you’ll enjoy it.
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Introduction to Eurocracy You are now officially a Eurocrat. Congratulations! Everyone hates you. Being a Eurocrat is an unloved job. You make too many rules (not as a trainee, you won’t), you are paid fat salaries (nope, not even close as a trainee), and you spend all day drinking wine with lobbyists plotting to remove democracy from real people (if only). The EU bubble is a world far removed from most ordinary people’s lives and you will have a full time job ahead of you trying to explain the difference between the Council of the European Union and the European Council, and why the EU is not 21st century Stalinism and/or Neoliberalism run amok (often to the same person). Good luck with that! Brussels is a fascinating place with most of the 30,000 Commission staff working here; the 751 egos (MEPs), and their assistants, not to mention much of the 6000 strong European Parliament staff; the 3500 Staff working for the Council, the 28 (at the time of printing!) member states, permanent representations and an army of lobbyists (that includes both private sector suits, NGO hippies and everything in between). Did we also mention that NATO has its headquarters here?! Point is, you’ll get to meet a lot of different people as long as you try to reach out. This ‘Bible’ has, as its mission, the Herculean task of easing your way into the brave new world of EU intricacies, unspoken rules and constant hustle for jobs. Hopefully, it will bring a little clarity for your new work, explain a bit about the context you are working in and give you some useful tips and tricks in order to land that sweet gig as an overpaid lobbyist when you finish your traineeship.
1. Before Your Traineeship
Brussels Brief
Before Your Traineeship
If there is one thing you should have learnt from your high school literature class, it is that every story has a beginning, middle and an end. The same applies to traineeships but in this case there is a bunch of work to be done even before your first day on the job.
1.1 Accommodation Brussels is a bustling city with hopeful politicians, young (and sometimes idealistic) professionals, evil lobbyists (and a few benign ones), journalists, students and many more moving in and out all the time. So there are always rooms, apartments and houses opening up for new tenants.
Also, it’s important to note that it is likely that your landlord will ask you to create an account to ‘block’ between 1-3 months of rent as guarantee. This is quite common in Belgium, although it does vary from landlord to landlord. Your new Belgian bank is familiar with the procedure and it only takes a few minutes to make a blocked account and fill out the documents. Once you leave the apartment, your landlord signs off on a similar document to release the deposit, and the money should be transferred within a few weeks (as long as you didn’t tear things up during your birthday houseparty).
Short term rentals (perfect if you’re only staying for 6 months) are possible across the board but there are a few things you need to be aware of. The standard rental contract is 3 years, so make sure you clarify the length of your contract even before you walk into the viewing. Shorter rentals are available at the discretion of the landlord, or under a sublet agreement with someone on a three year contract. This latter option is quite common and perfectly legit. However, you may have some issues on registering with your local commune (more on that later) if you opt for this. The options vary depending on preferred location and budget. However, what’s important to know is that Facebook groups specific to the Brussels housing market, such as Bruxelles à louer, are extremely useful, with a frequent exchange of places and details. Rooms typically rent between €400 and €600 and it is usually easy to find a place close to the “European Quarter”. Look out for whether or not charges (water, electricity, gas, heating) as well as internet are included in the total rent price and watch out for those scammers. As the old adage goes, if it looks too good to be true, it probably is, and if you’re asked to make a bank transfer through sketchy payment option before you have even seen the room, send them a turd sandwich instead.
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In general, many landlords can be both accommodating and understanding of short term rental needs. However, make sure to have agreed on an arrangement as some might want you to find a replacement to take over your room or require some form of guarantee that you won’t trash their house.
be a good solution if you want to have a base in Brussels before you settle on a permanent new home.For those who need an extra night lamp, dinner table or just a more practical shoe rack, we can recommend using Facebook’s marketplace where people sell interior decor at very low prices, and often for free.
“Rooms typically rent between €400 and €600 and it is usually easy to find a place close to the European Quarter” Useful websites for accommodation searches include:
This can save you both money and a lot of time in going all the way to IKEA for that Güngla you’ve been needing.
• Bruxelles à louer • Bxl à Louer - de bouche à oreille ( II) on Facebook • Immoweb.be on the World Wide Web.
Need help to feed your fish or move a sofa? Try the app Hoplr which connects you with people in your neighbourhood and helps spread relevant information, build a community and allows you to borrow a cup of sugar from your neighbour. Who said you cannot have a village community in the big city?
If you wish to establish yourself for a short period while you go apartment hunting, a temporary option is Brusselsdestination.be where you can rent rooms or apartments on a weekly basis. While this is a bit more expensive, it can
A typical trainee housing block
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1.2 Transportation A well-functioning transportation system is the life vein of any 21st century metropolis, ensuring that people and goods can move from point A to B with ease and avoid unnecessary loss of time in transit limbo. But how does Brussels fare on this point?
such as bus, train and metro, make sure to get a MoBiB card with either single trips or a commuter subscription early on. A monthly subscription for the network costs €49. A single ticket costs €2.10, while a 5 jump ticket stands at €8 and a 10 jump ticket currently at €14.
Not all metro stations are this pristine Ask a Neapolitan if they think the Brussels transportation system works well and they’re likely to praise it like you did Britney Spears in the 1990s. Ask a Nordic, and they might refer to Britney in 2007.
As of 2018, the Brussels metro lines have started requiring you to both check yourself in at the tolls and out when you exit. Make sure to keep your ticket on you because turnstile jumping twice is not a good look. This is also necessary when exiting the train at Brussels International To be fair, Brussels transportation takes you from Airport (Zaventem). Be aware that there is an one place to another with certainty. They work additional ticket fee of €5.40 for taking the train efficiently and run frequently enough. They’re to the airport. also not the dirtiest! Metro, buses and trams are packed, and get particularly tricky during rush There are two MoBiB cards available: one is a hours. A major setback, however, is the fact that basic card that you can buy over the counter the metro closes after midnight and night buses and the other is one with your mugshot, for (Noctis) run at a reduced interval. monthly or annual subscriptions. If you don’t have a picture ready, it can be taken at the ticket In order to navigate the transport system in a counter in Gare du Midi when you buy a card. It cost-effective (and legal) way, several options only takes a few minutes. Google Maps can tell are available to you. For traditional transport you how to use the network but you can also
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download the official STIB-MVIB app to get updates on which bus connects to your metro line (or not). If you want to go out of the city and visit “the real Belgium”, the Belgian rail service SNBC has several discount options offering cheap 10-journey tickets, weekend discounts (half price) and cheaper options for those so young they don’t remember a time before WiFi.
Bikes Want to go green? Forget the Villo city bicycles, for which you will need a subscription. Instead go for a Billy Bike. Push bikes with electric assistance for Brussels’ uneven landscape, these e-bikes allow you to cruise the European capital in a smooth manner and avoid arriving to work without being all sweaty.
“Brussels traffic is both notoriously congested and rowdy. Be mindful of where you are going” Other options that have seen increasing popularity in the last few years include the omnipresent electrical scooters. Rented by the minute, the Brussels landscape is dominated by the shocking green Lime e-scooters. To get started, you simply download the app and use your phone to unlock the many e-scooters around the city for a short and speedy trip. Make sure to look up and around because these things can be dangerous if misused.
Alternatively, one of the shiny red Uber Jump bikes, which you will see scattered across the city, are a good option too. Its as simple as the click on your app and off you go with an electric assisted kick.
Pro-tip: Dutch startup Swapfiets has emerged in several European countries in record time and with good reason. You rent a bike for 18€ per month and that’s it. No deposit to pay and all issues with your bike like flat tires, bad brakes or a loose kickstand are taken care of by the Need to look good for you date and want to ar- swipe on your app after which they come and rive with a bit of swagger? Try Scooty, a Belgian swap your bike with a fresh one. No questions startup that allows you to rent scooters (Vespa asked, zero hassle. A great option for the trainee style) around the city of Brussels in a use by use in town for a few months. basis all via your smartphone. You need a valid driver’s license for either scooters or a type B car license in order to drive these (normal car You decided to buy your own bike but need driver’s license). Charged by the minute, they parking spaces? Well there is a solution to that are a godsent in the warmer months. now. Several communes have the iconic green cyclo boxes where you can park your bike safely If you are picking up grandma at the airport or and with ease of mind. A subscription will only need to go shopping big for your housewarm- cost you €60 per year. That’s not a bad price for ing, car sharing app Ubeeqo is an option to rent bike safety these days. a car by the hour with prices starting at €3.5/ hour. Another option is Zencar, which has an If you do take a bike though, be warned that exclusively electric car fleet. Even a trainee can Brussels traffic and air quality together don’t afford a Sedan these days. make for the ideal match.
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One last but important note: Brussels traffic is both notoriously congested and rowdy. Be mindful of where you are going as cars come turning around narrow corners at high speed. Similarly, cyclists and pedestrians have little regard for traffic lights. Most importantly, due to the many different people gathered here, there is no clear traffic culture which means it is particularly difficult to understand the daily traffic patterns and the hazardous pedestrian or cyclist risks getting more action than they bargained for.
Out of Belgium Staying in the heart of Europe isn’t cutting it for you? Do you need to breathe some fresh(er) air in another city? There are some alternative escape routes you can use without having to sell your plasma at the nearest blood bank.
Flixbus offers budget-friendly trips between most major European cities and with more than 150 destinations served from Brussels it is probably the best thing to happen to youth travels since the interrail-pass. Prices can go as For the big spender: Taxis are present close to low as €11 for a single journey to other major your preferred watering hole but might cost you cities but remember to book well in advance to more than your meagre pay can bear. Alterna- save the big bucks. tively, Uber is still alive and kicking in Brussels. If you go with a group of 3-4 people it can even pay off rather than each buying a ticket for the IZY Train: Paris is a wonderful city and so close. metro. But we know how it is being short on cash and a Thalys ticket for €99 one-way just doesn’t cut If you arrive from Charleroi Airport (the low- it. Rejoice for there are other options for the fare airport in Brussels) the only transportation travelling youth. IZY trains offers cheap tickets option into the city is the Flibco bus. The Bus between Brussels and Paris going all the way arrives and departs at Gare du Midi. This bus down to €10 if you don’t mind standing up for a service costs €17 at the counter and €14.20 if few hours. Regular seats can go as low as €29, purchased online. leaving your wallet intact and allowing you to focus on the really important things in life: pasPro-tip: if you want to take an Uber from Gare tis and pétanque. du Midi beware that the app is blocked around the station. You will therefore have to go around a corner before you can hail a ride for you and your luggage.
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1.3 Getting Started - As Soon as You Arrive Opening A Bank Account: If you want to get paid, you will need a Belgian bank account. There are numerous options including BNP Paribas, KBC and Belfius. For convenience, we suggest you try ING, a Dutch bank conveniently located in Schuman and Place Luxembourg. They are familiar with welcoming new trainees and setting up an account quickly and painlessly. ING will offer you a Maestro debit card which works perfectly well in Belgium. However, it makes online shopping a bit of a pain as you need a separate card reader. For this and for a venture into fintech, we recommend Revolut, an app where you can add funds onto a prepaid (Visa card) and has a bunch of other benefits such as spot foreign exchange rates and the ability to transfer and receive funds to and from your friends instantly. A few things to remember when getting your bank account: it is important you head there bright and early to schedule an appointment. Lunch and after work hours are likely to be packed with people so do try to get an early squeeze. If possible, go before your traineeship starts. Your monthly salary and drunken withdrawals will thank you for it (you avoid extra fees for operating from a Belgian account). Remember to bring your trainee contract with you (and of course some picture ID) as the bank will require some form of documentation for your employment. Other than that it’s pretty simple and can be done in less than 30 minutes.
Registering in Your Commune: Registering at your commune helps keep track of your residency and allows you to be added to a system that holds you accountable for paying two taxes: transport and recycling trash. Brussels is divided into 19 semi-autonomous units: communes. Each of these are responsible for keep
ing tabs on their residents and administering a range of public services like garbage collection or the super-local police force. But with great diversity comes even greater differences. Some communes have a good reputation for being well organised while others have a, shall we call it somewhat lagging reputation for efficient public services (we’re looking at you Bruxelles-Ville). To say that there are any uniform experiences when dealing with the public authorities in Brussels would be as close to a Trumpian lie as we could go. In fact, we have both heard and experienced all kinds of services ranging from the expedient and pleasant to the outright nightmarish ones queuing in line for hours in the morning only to be sent home with nothing to show for it. At the time of printing there are still 19 communes: Anderlecht Auderghem (Oudergem) Berchem-Sainte-Agathe (Sint-Agatha-Berchem) Ville-Bruxelles (Stad Brussel) Etterbeek Evere Forest (Vorst) Ganshoren Ixelles (Elsene) Jette oekelberg Molenbeek Saint Jean (Sint Jans Molenbeek) Saint-Gilles (Sint-Gillis) Saint-Josse-ten-Noode (Sint-Joost-ten-Node) Schaerbeek (Schaarbeek) Uccle (Ukkel) Watermael-Boitsfort (Watermaal-Bosvoorde) Woluwe Saint Lambert (Sint Lambrechts Woluwe) Woluwe-Saint-Pierre (Sint-Pieters-Woluwe)
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To register you head to your commune’s office (see the relevant link above for address and opening hours). We recommend you start the process online if your Commune allows this or call them to set up an appointment in order to avoid wasting hours standing in queues. When you go to the commune office you will need to bring: An ID (Passport or similar); 2 ID passport sized photos (there are photo machines available at Gare Centrale and Gare du Midi) and your rental contract. The clerk assigned will help you register in the system. It is worth noting that all bureaucratic processes are in French and Dutch only.
cy. Make sure to have your name on the door. If this step goes well, you can return to the Commune office in the coming days to pick up your residency card. Job complete and what’s more, you can actually consider Brussels ‘home’ from now on.
One word though. Although not legally kosher, many (if not most) short term residents in Brussels never bother to register. Even some long term residents find the whole process too cumbersome to be bothered. But we advise that you do register in order to have your arrangements in place should something unforeseen happen. And as a representative of both your A somewhat peculiar feature of the registration home country and the glorious European Union, is a follow up by the police. They will come by we shouldn’t be the ones to encourage breaking your house in the coming weeks (making sure the rules. At least not while we are merely humyou are home at the same time as the police is ble trainees. That stuff is for the big shots... the tricky bit) to confirm your place of residen-
Gym Membership It goes without saying that physical exercise is great for the body, burning off those Belgian fries, but also for the brain, activating just the right kind of dopamine to keep you going through a dreary working week. So if you feel like staying active off-work hours, here are some options: BasicFit is a decent gym that has several spaces across the city. The convenience lies in the membership being valid for any one location. You can go to the ones in the European Quarter on work days and have the option of other ones, for instance closer downtown, on the weekends. Bonus feature: they have locations in 5 countries with universal access to members. Jims is also another feasible option with several locations across the city, although the same rule of free entry doesn’t apply. JIMS often run promotion campaigns so check if they have an offer that suits your needs.. Wildcard option, there is also another option right by the parliament: World Class. Although this one has only one location, its indoor pool makes it all worth the while. Winners Club is a less conventional option for those keen on spending a little extra money on a less crowded, more varied gym option. From indoor rock climbing to aerobics and yoga, this place will soothe any tight muscle knot. Membership can vary between gym and depending on the package you choose, but you are safe in estimating anywhere between 20-30 euro per month one most of the above.
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Yoga & Pilates studios
Running events
If you are more into mind and body workouts, Brussels is increasingly growing its yoga studios presence. It doesn’t matter where you live, you’ll quickly find one of these restorative places near you.
For the runners in you, Brussels is a great place! If you’re a long time fan of the sport, this city will introduce you to a multicultural environment of fellow runners from all over Europe and more. If you’re only beginning, Brussels is a good place to train over flat and hill-like terrains.
Yoga Room is a renowned classic, with 4 locations (Saint Gilles, Uccle, Stockel and most recently Schaerbeek) this studio offers a vast 20 km of Brussels: this event is held every variety of yogas: rom yoga for beginners, to de- May. For many, it’s the motivation they didn’t tox flow, to hot yoga you’ll find it all. know they needed to get their summer body on. With an average of 40,000 runners a year, If you are looking for pilates or gyrotonic - a it’s typically a city-round events with crowds form of exercise that uses a specific apparatus gathering to chant, drum and tempt the runto help you move in a circular motion and open ners into sugary-stacks to keep them going to the hips - Corpus Studios is the place to be. the end. Watch this year’s 40th anniversary With 2 locations in the city (Place de Londres video for inspiration. and Flagey), it serves much of Ixelles population. Brussels Half Marathon & Marathon occur simultaneously in the fall of every year. Less popAlso with 2 locations (Chatelain and Tromberg), ulated, both of these events are typically lived Brussels oga Lo is an alternative option for with a little more seriousness than their 20 those looking for a yoga studio with a variety of km counterpart. A good opportunity for those classes and hours. looking for a little challenge and a chance to stay fit through the colder months. Decently priced, Bikram Yoga Louise offers only hot yoga classes for the truly dedicated. Serendip Spa & Yoga is situated in Place Stephanie and is the best of both worlds, bringing together an ample choice of yoga courses as well as a spa center. Treat the mind, body and soul all in one here.
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Phone With EU roaming finally abolished, rejoice, you can actually use your phone while abroad without bleeding money. But should you want to get a local Belgian number (good idea if you want to get called up for a job interview post-traineeship) then try out one of these options: Mobile Vikings: an easy solution that allows for you to top-up as you go, with different packages heavy on either data, calling or texting. They can send you a sim card for free and you just take it from there, easy-peasy. Proximus: The legacy company in Belgium (they had a monopoly). Unfortunately we haven’t had the best experiences with Proximus, so we suggest you try someone else. Monopolies just aren’t very EU’ish (preach to Vestager). French hegemon Orange is also available but might be the better choice if you want to go for a full package of TV, Internet and phone subscription.
Internet If your new home doesn’t have internet then you might be in for a rough ride. Most Belgian operators are slow and expensive, with a cap limit on your amount of surfing. That is not ideal when you are trying to binge watch Borgen. On top of that, most try to bundle you with a TV and phone subscription. That’s a load of beeswax if you’re only here for 6 months, so check if your apartment has some kind of internet. Should you need to acquire your own internet package, then try out Telenet. It takes about a week for them to come by, but you can schedule an appointment for either the morning (9am-1pm) or the afternoon (2pm-8pm), which is as good a service as we have experienced here.
“With EU roaming finally abolished, rejoice, you can actually use your phone while abroad without bleeding money”
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1.4 The City Brussels is in some ways an international cosmopolitan city and beacon of multiculturalism. In other ways, it’s the worst of Europe. It has all the chaos of the South and none of the infrastructure of the North. Equally it has all the climate of the North and not much of the friendliness of the South. In any case, you’ll grow to love the place, much like an ugly child of yours that you just can’t help to see as cute.
Practical Information - Lost in Translation Being a bilingual city, remember that all proper names in Brussels, for example street names, parks, landmarks etc. have both a French and Flemish moniker: Bruxelles-Ville = Stad Brussel; Ixelles = Elsene; Port de Namur = Naamsepoort and so on. Sometimes it is more obvious than others (maybe Rue des Deux Eglises is obviously Tweekerkenstraat to you), but people almost exclusively refer to the names in French. However, a bus or tram might have the name written in Flemish, so it is helpful to remember a few places (your address) in both tongues. This is also a good thing to keep in mind when you write down the address of your newest crush on Google Maps and feel helplessly lost.
Neighbourhoods There is a reason they put the EU in Belgium. They’re quite used to politics being complicated. Not only is the country divided in Flemish north, Walloon south and love child Brussels stuck in the middle (yes we left out the tiny German enclave, sorry), but Brussels is itself divided into 19 communes as described above.
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What Brussels lacks in city wide management it makes up for in diversity. The city is a sprawling amalgamation of Belgian society combined with immigrant neighbourhoods, influences from Belgium’s less than stellar colonial legacy, university areas, EU institutions, parks and recreational areas and much more. The European Institutions i.e. The European Parliament, the Council and the Commission’s headquarter (the Berlaymont building) along with most of the other DGs (see the EU 101 section for more information) as well as most Permanent Representations and the vast landscape of NGO lobby offices, are all located in the “European Quarter” colloquially named so, for fairly obvious reasons. The majority of these offices lie within the Etterbeek or Ixelles neighbourhood and have a distinct “Eurobubble” feeling with very little French heard, but a surprisingly high rate of Spanish and Italian. The most popular areas among students and young professionals are Ixelles, Etterbeek, Bruxelles-Ville, Saint-Gilles and Schaerbeek. They are all close to the main EU buildings around Schuman and it is relatively easy to find affordable accommodation on a trainee budget. Bruxelles-Ville is the so-called centre of Brussels that reaches all the way to the outskirts (the Atomium belongs to Bruxelles Ville). Nonetheless this is where the Grand Place is and where Brussels’s favourite couple, Manneken and Jeanneke Pis, live. It will probably become the place where you spend most of your time, especially when you have visitors over, as the hotspots of Saint Catherine, Dansaert, Mont Des Arts and Marolles are all within the scope of the 1000 postcode.
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Schaerbeek lies to the area opposite of Ixelles and Etterbeek. A slow burner these days but perfect walking distance to the EU institutions at Schuman. A very young neighbourhood with a diverse population, it is a common go-to area for new trainees looking to find their first Brussels flat. It also holds family friendly Parc Josaphat and borders Parc Cinquantenaire, a good spot to go for a run. Ixelles hosts the dubious honor of being the youngest area of Brussels, popular with university students, undoubtedly because it hosts the UniversitĂŠ Libre de Bruxelles (ULB) and the Vrije Universiteit Brussel (VUB). Ixelles also hosts subsection Matonge which takes its name after a neighbourhood in Kinshasa. You get a truly African vibe here at the many bars, hairdressers, groceries as well as the wonderful restaurants which lie side by side on Rue de la Long Vie. The Perfect place to get some succulent mutton or a whole fried fish. Beware of the chili though. It is not for the faint-hearted.
Sandwiched in between Ixelles and Schaerbeek, is Etterbeek. Densely populated with Eurobubble migrants as any place, but with fewer natural splendors such as lakes or parks it is perhaps not the place you will settle in in the long term. Etterbeek does, however, come with both a close proximity to the EU institutions and hosts legendary Maison Antoine on Place Jourdan, thereby offering its inhabitants the best fries available in Brussels, at least judging by the queue ever present there. Saint-Gilles is the up and coming trendy wunderkind of Brussels where we all hope to move someday when we get that permanent contract. Parts of Saint-Gilles have a distinct affluent vibe while others are a microcosm of Brussels and in many ways it is a real reflection of the city. It is also the home of a significant Portuguese community as seen by the number of restaurants and even the local church which does special services in Portuguese. The summertime sees Saint-Gilles host a number of small markets making it the perfect place to go for an after-work drink.
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Weather — The Belgian Tax You’re Paying Oh, Bruxelles ma belle, what is there to say? We learn to love you at your worst, so that we can enjoy you at your finest. You might not be paying any taxes on your EU wage, but the tax you’re paying is the Belgian weather. Brussels has a lot to offer but blue skies and sunshine are not always on the menu. When they are though, it is bliss. The rest of the time, cover up, wear waterproof shoes, and forget your umbrella. The wet, windy rain ensures your umbrella does not survive over a week. Don’t believe us? Try your luck.
Need to go full on Nigel Farage and must have your home products in order to satiate the eurosceptic in your stomach? Place Jourdan hosts several nationality specialty stores including a Polish; a Sicilian; a Russian shop and the infamous Scanshop for all Northerners. For the post-structuralist consumer, try bio-supermarket Färmer at Saint Catherine which also has a wide selection of vegan and gluten-free products.
If you haven’t had the time for groceries all week, the Chasseurs Ardennais market in Schaerbeek on Friday afternoons will save you. Groceries and Home Goods A well-rounded supply of produce, meats and For all the little things in your new home, Hema fish. Plus, a chance to have a snack and a good and Zeeman are fantastically utilitarian; spoons, local beer while you’re at it. towels, glasses, sheets. Any utility for your new house can be found here and you’ll most likely A great farmer’s market if you are keen to start become great friends with the staff after 5-6 re- the week right on Mondays is the one located in peat visits. Enjoy the treasure hunt. For a more the square of Saint Gilles’ commune: the Markt eclectic and less useful trip, go to Flying Tiger, Van Meenenplein. While there is ample choice the Danish superstore of wondrous eclectic ev- of food, it is also a good chance to start the week with a social drink. erythings. Brussels is home to a few supermarkets, some of which are dominant in the francophone world, but not well known outside. Carrefour, a standard supermarket with most basic goods, is ubiquitous. Good croissants and baked goods for that homemade brunch. Local champion, Delhaize, is similar although less ubiquitous. Good place to go if you’re having a crémaillère (housewarming).
The Barn bio market located in both Etterbeek and Saint Gilles is a great place for some indoor organic produce. Highly recommended if you are into sustainable grocery shopping. Having your gluten allergic uncle visiting? Take a trip to the gluten-free bakery Chambelland in outer-Ixelles.
German socialist paradises Aldi and Lidl offer the shopping prices most friendly to your trainee level income. They also have the best gin and whiskeys in the world. So this is likely the place to go for an early weekend start. Need to go heavy shopping? Colruyt is a good option for the trainee who needs to buy by the bulk.
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Pro tip : If you want to shop like a pro go to the outdoor bazaar at Gare du Midi on Sundays (6am2pm). The bazaar is one of the biggest outdoor markets in Europe, so if you have the stomach for haggling a bit you can get a good deal on vegetables, flowers, clothes. Basically anything you could want for your new home in the Capital of Europe, straight out of all the other capitals of Europe. Poetic and cheap.
Pro tip : Marche des Tanneurs is a fruit and vegetable market that sells coveted bio products that are very in right now. All joking aside, most if not all of their products are locally sourced and reasonably priced
Pro tip : A tech solution that will save the world is the app TooGoodToGo. The idea is that restaurants and supermarkets post portions of food in the morning that they are likely going to have left over by the end of the day for a tiny fraction of the price. All in the name of reducing food waste you need to be ready to be quick to the mark in purchasing the portions on that day, and a tad bit of patience while you wait for the closing time in order to go and pick up your well-gotten gains.
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1.5 EU 101 The EU is a strange beast. More of a federal state than an international organisation giving people some nervous twitches, but not enough of a state to make others happy. What matters in the EU is compromise and getting legislation through, which is a long process involving multitudes of partners, institutions, political and cultural considerations and some finely honed political skills. But you’re here to change the world, so go ahead. But don’t be surprised if your policy document gets stuck in a heari ng for 6-8 months. Below we briefly go through the main EU actors, and most likely your new boss.
This building is known as the Berlaymont. Not to be confused with Berlaymonster
The European Commission The European Commission is the EU’s executive arm. Nobody knows what that means exactly, but basically it is the EU’s government. It consists of 28 Commissioners (one from each country) lead by the President (sort of like your Prime Minister at home). Known as ‘the Guardian of the Treaties’, it is exclusively responsible for proposing laws, checking that member states are doing what they should be doing in implementing EU law and running the day to day EU affairs. But there’s a limit to the joy. The Commission has wide powers when it comes to market regulation, notably competition policy (anyone in Google or Apple noticed recently?). Meanwhile, it is far more restricted by Member States in other areas like taxation, education and foreign policy.
The Commission employs around 30.000 people. That may sound like the Persian army, but remember these people service the EU’s 500 million citizens, so it’s more like Sparta. In comparison, the US federal government employs around 2 million people. What’s more, the EU only has about 1% of the Member States total GDP. Compare that to 20% in the US or 57% in France and the Commission immediately looks much less enormous. Of all the EU budget, 94% is spent back in Member States (that means less money for trainees), placing some restrictions on what the Commission can implement in terms of utopian EU rules. The Commission is accountable before the European Parliament, and its President is practically elected by the Parliament by the beautifully onomatopoeic ‘Spitzenkandidaten’ procedure. If It sounds like democracy. New Commission President, Ursula Von Der Leyen who is set to take over as of 1 November was surprisingly not chosen through this process...
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The European Parliament The only directly elected EU institution, so it’s basically your guarantee for democratic participation. It has grown from a symbolic place with virtually no influence to a political powerhouse equal to the Council of Ministers and has since 2014 decided that it elects the Commission president by a cheeky interpretation of the Lisbon Treaty.
by us citizens, so fair enough). Made up of 751 MEPs (Member of the European Parliament) elected by somewhat proportional voting in the member states, it consists of several political groups, the biggest ones being the conservative EPP the Social Democratic S&D and the liberal, uhm, ‘centrist’ Renew Europe group.
The EP has equal say in almost all legislation and never misses a chance to let anyone know that it feels it should be more involved (it is elected
For legislation to pass it usually requires a majority, which no single political group has, meaning that compromise is not just a virtue, but unavoidable.
This is where the democracy sausage is made
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The Council
The European Council
The Council of the European Union. We’ll just say Council, thank you very much. This is where Member States meet and vote according to national interests with final say belonging to, you guessed it, the national ministers.
Wait what? didn’t you just mention that? Well not exactly. The European Council is where the EU heads of state (presidents, prime ministers) meet a few times a year to discuss the general direction of the EU. It’s sort of a parent version of the Council.
Technically 10 council formations exist (one for agriculture, one for foreign policy and so on) who then work together with the European Parliament on finding a compromise on legislation. This is similar to the process in the US, with the Council being similar to the Senate. Each country votes according to population size. For a law to pass it needs a double majority representing: 55% of the countries and 65% of the populations. This ensures that neither many small states nor a few large ones can trump the rest of them. And although you can be forgiven from not hearing this in your daily news bulletin, it ensures that most legislation is passed with all countries on board as everyone has something to gain by being in the process. What comes out of Brussels really is what we all agreed to in the end.
Although the European Council is not part of the daily legislative process, it is important because nothing can be done without the member states (they pay the bills). Its president is elected for a 2.5 year period and can be re-elected once. The current president is former Polish Prime Minister, Donald Tusk with Belgian prime minister Charles Michel set to take over on 1 November. The president shares the role of representing the EU with the president of the Commission in international settings. This makes it really messy to figure out who is the leader of the EU, not to mention the obviously confusing names of the institutions. The EU might be expertly skilled at ensuring balance of power but could definitely use an American branding agency when it comes to making up new job titles.
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Committees
Agencies
The Committee of the Regions (CoR) and the Economic and Social Committee (EESC) are two EU bodies charged with bringing together stakeholders and representatives from society to feed input to the EU. Each consists of 350 members but share little political power between them. They do however give valuable input on what is needed on the ground and can set the agenda for future legislation.
There are a number of EU agencies spread out across the 28 Member States. The agencies perform a range of monitoring, technical and scientific tasks, thereby helping and supporting the Commission in areas where a high degree of technical expertise is needed.
The Economic and Social Committee, similarly, is made up of “social partners” meaning representatives of businesses and labour unions and other social partners like NGOs in order to have their voices heard in Brussels. The well-functioning of the Single Market is paramount to the EU and all Brussels bureaucrats fear being told they have ignored the people.
Feeling as paranoid about the prospects of global extinction as Elon Musk or do you have an inner Captain Kirk in your belly? The European Space Agency (ESA) employs around 2200 people. Although technically not an EU agency, the EU does have a space policy and with 22 EU member States participating in the EAS, it is a rather technical difference for anyone but the accountants. Who said the EU was limited to the Single Market and tariff collection? To infinity and beyond!
The most commonly known are Europol (the EU’s police cooperation organisation), Eurojust (the body which ensures cooperation between judicial The Committee of the Regions is comprised of lo- officials such as prosecutors and judges), the Eurocal and regional politicians from around the 28 EU pean Medicines Agency (which is leaving its Lonmember states. They weigh in with opinions on don offices to move to Amsterdam this year) and EU legislation since most EU law affects their local The European Food and Safety Authority (EFSA) work and has to be implemented by local officials. located in Parma, because when it comes to food Mayors of the world unite! safety we can only trust the Italians.
What happens in Justus Lipsius stays in Justus Lipsius
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2.1 Work time First Day - First Impressions Being the newbie in the office isn’t always so bad, especially when you know the environment you are coming into. Information, however, might not be offered to you within the first day of walking in. So we recommend you find a moment with a colleague you feel comfortable with to ask about the “do’s and don’ts” of your unit. Supervisors are made out of the same organic material you are, and they don’t bite. If they do, let us know your story after you’ve let the police know.
Some end up overloaded. Other times trainees end up being lost in the office with little management devoted to making your time useful. If you end up having no work assigned to you, a good idea is to simply write your colleagues and ask if you can help out with something. It never hurt anyone to show initiative and it will go a long way in earning you that promotion you were looking for.
Get in tune from the first day and keep playing to that groove for the rest of your traineeship. Think of yourself part fiddle player in a large Jazz band. Fiddler on the Berlaymont.
There is no official dress code in the EU Institutions. Yes, you will see a bit of everything, and are free to do almost all that you like, but being the new kid on the block, it’s not a bad idea to overdress a bit (you can always scale back) and take cues from your unit.
One last word of advice. Traineeships can be a varied experience. Some click with their unit on day one and have interesting work to do.
Dress Code
Sure, it’s not fair but you’re also the last one on the ladder so learn to make your way up with
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respect and with fine etiquette. It’s the little Remember to give yourself a few extra minutes things that can help you stand out (for better or to pass through security, much like a standard for worse). airport check. Also be aware that when the big 28 are in town, Schuman is a “no-go” area so One thing to keep in mind: will you be partici- be prepared to adjust your morning commute to pating in meetings with people outside your in- make way for the motorcades. stitution? In that case, remember that you are also representing your unit and first impressions For those of you working around Schuman, you go a long way (you might want to apply for a job will receive an email in advance explaining how led by the people you encounter at meetings). to deal with the extra security precautions. Procedures can vary from place to place with the main buildings, like the Berlaymont (where Recent years of terror attacks around Europe all the Commissioners are) being extra heavy on and in Brussels has left its mark on everyone’s security. One annoying feature is the fact that consciousnesses and on the face of many capi- you cannot necessarily go from a Commission tals, now teeming with extra police and military. building to the Parliament or Council building.
Security
This applies to Brussels in particular. When you Even senior staff have to go through security at host the EU and regularly have 28 heads of gov- the other institutions. That is stupid and wasteernment come by for coffee meetings, security ful. But that’s how it is. is tightened. In daily practice, you’ll manage. Sorry champ.
LGBTI Life Brussels is generally an open city towards sexual orientation and it is frequent to see same-sex couples in public spaces. The European institutions are also an inclusive workplace, however, some staff do not feel comfortable to talk openly about their sexual orientation. The Blue Book Trainees’ LGBTI+ association (Queer Stagiaires) aims at raising awareness about queer culture and rights and gathers trainees interested in these topics. Egalité represents all LGBTI+ questions in the EU institutions and organises conferences and events. Outside the institutions there are other organisations with the same scope, Rainbowhouse being the best-known by EU trainees.
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Etiquette The world is beautiful because it is varied, but only up until a certain point. Your educational and cultural background may differ from your neighbour’s, and that is not to say either one of you are in the wrong. However, in the workplace there are a series of unspoken rules that should be accounted for.
course). A few minutes won’t kill anyone, but avoid being the last one to show up and the first one to go.
Social media etiquette is key in modern work settings. Suffice to say posting about your job can be fun, but an Instagram picture of your office is of no one’s interest, let alone of use to These are considered appropriate etiquette for your office. When it comes to adding your colleagues on social media, play it by ear. the context you may find yourself in.
“Remember to give yourself a few extra minutes to pass through security” What do we mean? For instance, in writing or responding to an email from a colleague, always use formal and adequate language. Address the person with respect and authority, kindly ask them for clarifications, do not dismiss them or talk in abbreviated, slang terms (TTYL). There is no need to demand a response, or abruptly request things such as a foot massage (stranger things have happened).
The usual good practice is to add them on LinkedIn. Twitter is the next best logical step and save Facebook and Instagram for your BFFs.
Humility
There is no doubt you have managed to make it through a selection of tens of thousands of candidates to secure a spot as a Bluebook or Schuman trainee within the EU institutions. Etiquette also refers to the way you behave in Still, there is much you have yet to learn and the office. Perhaps it is not absolutely neces- there isn’t a boss, a unit, or a working environsary to ask for your days off on the very first ment that cannot teach you something about day of work. That can be done as you settle human nature, professional realisation, or your into the new workplace, and get to observe the very own life. behaviour and the work patterns of other colleagues, as well. Just because you have half a dozen degrees, went to the College of Europe and your uncle is Show up on time, and in the first, few weeks, Jose Barroso, doesn’t mean you can go around notice how others go about the day. Of course treating people like they are inferior. Brussels is you can ask for the precise working hours. In a small town and stink spreads quickly. Take it doing so, you set yourself to those hours (in the all in like a sponge and remember, humility will limits of human and/or transport error of likely get you a few extra friends too.
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Ask Questions You are new to your position, probably new to Brussels and so you will need to ask questions. And your new colleagues know this so don’t be shy. It is a much better strategy to ask a one more question than making a preventable mistake. Besides, asking questions just demonstrates that you are interested in your work, your colleagues and are taking your job seriously. That’s a good way to start your career and will pay off.
know exactly what someone is talking about when they are introducing themselves and what they do. The intranet is also a good source for internal institutional news and a valuable tool to find out which unit to contact on that inter-group report your unit has been struggling with for the last 12 years. The intranet is also a treasure trove of opportunities to sign up for special training sessions.
Second, traineeships vary a lot depending on the DG, agency, and the individual unit you will be Use the opportunity to go and learn something working in. Some have too much work for you, new and impress your head of unit with your so speak up in case you’re drowning, and oth- newly updated knowledge of the most obscure
ers, well others forget to delegate enough work. If you find yourself in that situation remember this: it never hurts to ask an extra time if you can help out with something, it only makes you stand out even more.
KYU - Know Your Unit An organigram is not a musical instrument. Rather it is the source of context in an organisation. Every decent intranet should have a copy of the organigram showing your unit and its relation to the other units within your DG. The fun thing is that you can see who your boss’ boss is and
budgetary procedures or the latest gossip from the agency with which your DG is in a constant turf war.
KYP - Know Your Peers
A stranger is a friend you don’t know yet, and a fellow trainee is a future colleague. No one is better to help you out than your fellow trainees, because they know exactly what kinds of problems you are facing and probably have some good advice to share, albeit where the next bar is. It is easy to fall into the trap of hanging out only with trainees from your own office, and unit.
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There can be a great camaraderie with these people, but there is also a shared feeling of fraternity with trainees in other DGs.
business cards like they’re rare Pokemon. Business cards are like seeds, they tend to sprout when you least expect them to. People don’t know your name or your background unless you tell them, and a business card is a good way to spur interest in you and make sure your email doesn’t slip the mind.
So make the most to reach out, join trainee organised events such as those from the EC Trainee’s Committee and Schuman Trainees Committee. Your time as a trainee will absolutely fly by so do it right and make the most of The most effective way to get a job after your it, just as you did during your Erasmus. traineeship is to be referred by someone. That person could be the boss of your boss. It could also just as well be your fellow trainNetworking ee, your supervisor or your landlord (no jokes, Network network network is an age old cli- turns out eurocrats have some spare change to che... that works. To most people a dreaded invest in property and such things). thing, but no (wo)man is an island, especially in Brussels where you’ll find yourself creepily Make yourself visible and be honest about your sharing Facebook friends with everyone, let interests. Even though you might not get the first dream job, there will be an opening somealone LinkedIn contacts. where soon and having shown your face and That being said, don’t worry. You’ll network all talked about your background is the best way the time even if you don’t know it. Networking to get ahead. That being said don’t be overly is asking questions, showing up at conferences interested. It is wise to flatter people with powand explaining who you are and your back- er but remember Machiavelli’s magnum opus ground. Use your time as a trainee to gather ‘The Prince’ was advice to people already with information and get to know people. Hand out some power, not trainees. business cards like it’s free candy and collect
“Network network network is an age old cliche... that works”
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Harassment If you need people to talk to, the MeTooEP people are doing a stellar job in providing a pla orm for debates, support and making current and future MEPs sign a manifesto to prevent creepy practices in the future. Nothing as of yet in the Commission but feel free to work If anyone starts to get handsy, invites you to on that. one-on-one social occasions or makes inappropriate comments, don’t fret in talking about it Suffice to say any type of harassment is not whether that is to your peers, other colleagues to be tolerated. Bullying is another workplace or, if need be, human resources. The test for plague and can happen equally from superiors identifying any of this, is your own level of com- as well as other trainees. Same as with sexual fort. There is no objective standard for harass- harassment: discomfort + repetition is usualment, other than that stipulated in law and in ly the way to go about assessing whether the specific HR guidelines, so use the golden rule: nickname ‘Brexit Bobby’ is a witty assessment if you feel uncomfortable and the behaviour is of your political inclinations or actually a xenophobic trope against Brits called Robert. repetitive, it’s time to act. Time’s up! Unless you’ve been living under a rock, the MeToo campaign has taken hold of Western consciousness as the long suffering of workplace sexual harassment has been put in the centre of social and political conversation.
“If you feel uncomfortable and the behaviour is repetitive, it’s time to act. Time’s up!”
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Stay Informed Of course, a successful trainee is an informed trainee. We don’t have to spell out to you at this point that this section is a shameless plug to sign up to Brussels Brief and follow us in all social media channels, not necessarily to be better informed, but to be informed and entertained. Infotainment if you like. For when you’re not browsing through the Brief, we recommend both newsletters and podcasts as the most efficient (and millennial) way to keep informed during your traineeship. Thankfully, the past few years have seen an explosion of EU-related content in that regard.
“We recommend both newsletters and podcasts as the most efficient way to keep informed during your traineeship”
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Newsletters
Podcasts
Politico Brussels Playbook - this is the standard bearer of daily newsletters. With over 60,000 subscribers (we’re working to climb to these heights) it is the digest that begins the day. Released every day at 7am, the newsletter formerly run by Brussels giant Ryan Heath has been taken over by German Florian Eder after Ryan got tired of waking up at ungodly hours just so Angela Merkel’s Chief of Staff could have something to report to Mutti in the morning. Dense and packed with info, skim and skip to the end of the newsletter if only to see whose birthday it is on that day (a strangely addictive element). ‘Jacques Delors turns 150 today’ is exactly what I want to know as I’m waking myself up from my coma with my morning coffee.
EU Confidential: Politico’s flagship audio product and self-described No. 1 EU podcast. Previously hosted by honorary European Ryan Heath, it is now run by triumvirate Annabelle Dickson, Rym Momtaz and Matthew Karnitschnig. The podcast discusses the week’s news stories in EU and Europe in general. Each episode features interviews with the high rollers such as MEPs, Commissioner so and so and other leading people from the EU bubble and beyond.
Remainiacs: The UK’s leading anti-Brexit podcast. Hosted by Dorian Lynskey with staple contributors like Ian Dunt (and his infectious laughter) Alex Andreou (and his sweet, sweet bass), Best for Britain Crusader Naomi Smith, Brexit truther Ros Taylor and resident Merkel Whisperer, Nina Schick. This is the podcast Euractiv’s The Brief - the awkwardly titled newsletter for all British citizens who need to laugh at the Brexfrom Euractiv is an end of day wrap up of the news in it bonanza and keep sanity throughout the emerging Brussels. Focusing on Euractiv’s more detail-oriented, decades as the UK finally becomes an independent wonky style, it is a good dessert to the day if only to Singapore off the coast of France. As Churchill willed see what to look out for in the next morning’s Play- it. book. Previously in Europe: Hosted by Irish duo Hugh and Eurotopics - A little-known but very useful gem of a Kieran they discuss the big events of Europe with an newsletter rounding up the press from multiple mem- emphasis on covering the stories which the English ber states on the major thematic issues of the week. media overlooked during the week and make some The neat thing about this one is that they take the sense of this strange phenomenon we call “Europe”. trouble of translating excerpts from these different media that would otherwise be inaccessible to you The Europeans Podcast: A relative newcomer on the unless you happen to speak Bulgarian, French and bloc. This “moderately amusing” programme is hostLithuanian and read the press in all those countries. ed by British AFP journalist Katy Lee dialling in from Good for you Glotzilla. Paris with partner in crime Dominic Kraemer usually tapping in with his beautiful baritone from AmsterQuartz Daily Brief - If you need to burst the bubble, dam. The pod talks about European culture and pocheck out firebrand internet media startup Quartz’s litical developments across our beloved continent in Daily Brief for a morning roundup of what’s important general. It takes people beyond the narrow Brussels around the world. It is an easy digest and will make bubble and looks at interesting stories you might not you sound smarter around the water cooler by bring- have heard of while browsing through Le Monde over ing up topics not usually visited by the Brussels policy breakfast. nerd.
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TV Television and European affairs have long been a dull affair but new winds are on the horizon. Euronews have recently significantly upped their mojos from a dire and dull newsreel of faceless news to a young, sexy and intrepid programming centred around news anchors covering European politics. The flagship show is Raw Politics, a daily round up of the news of the day in a conversational format feuring journalists, MEP and NGOs representatives shot in the majestic (and hitherto underused) studios in the European Parliament. A must watch if you want to recognise faces in and among the Brussels Bubble.
Nina Schick: Tweeter extraordinaire on all things Brexit and usually on a UK TV show to throw cold water on Brexiteers screaming that Germany wants to sell the UK cars which is why the EU has to surrender unconditionally. The best choice if you need someone to bridge the gap between how things play out in the UK and among the rest.
Donald Tusk: The more you get to know The Tusk the more you like him. Not only did he appear in a Polish song contest programme in his youth, he also fought for Democracy during the Cold War and these days speaks truth to wannabe autocrats in Europe when Other options for TV include British ‘Sky News’ (avail- needed. Maybe the Americans mistook another Donable free on Youtube) to witness the Brexit gasoline ald for him?.... We also recommend his Instagram dumpster fire burn in real time and fun times in the which is a treasure trove of sour Polish humour and amazing poses. House of Commons. Ordeeeer. Mehreen Khan: The Financial Times’ star reporter is the one to follow if you want to know what the budThe EU Twittersphere - Yes, we know that everyone get implications for the Common Agricultural Policy has a twitter account with 3.5 followers. But Twitter is will be over the next decade, if there’s some high leva treasure trove for EU commentary and personalities el intrigue between the French and German finance to go full monty. It shows off the incredible range of ministers brewing or want to get the latest health uphumor and nerdiness readily available for the hungry date on the Euro. EU consumers. And importantly, it is an indispensable place for journalists to get and deliver information Kereto Gormsen: Our managing editor throws out a (thank you Laura Kayali you copyright Dauphin). Here few well-placed barbs on occasion. Even former Finnis an assorted list of some of our favorite Tweet Ex- ish Prime Minister Alexander Stubb appreciates his analysis of the Belgian weather. Help him break 200 traordinaires: twitter followers before the UK leaves the EU. Jon Worth: We have a special place in our hearts for Jon Worth. He is possibly the person who singlehand- Berlaymonster: Without the Beast from the Berlay edly kept EU-Twitter alive for years. He constantly there would be no reason to stay in Brussels. By far tweets as if there is no tomorrow about EU politics the best satirical take downs of all things EU related. and recently, Brexit, and somehow also makes time So much so that our furry friend was named the No. to write posts on his blog where he brilliantly dissects 2 EU influencer in 2018. EU and UK politicians. If you’re new to twitter give JW a go first.
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Ahead of our friend Jon Worth and French baladeur so as of August 2019 he will be based in the US but and Commission slayer Jean Quatremer from Libera- there is no doubt the might of his tweet will be felt tion (worth following if you dabble in French). from across the waters. DG Meme: Newcomer on the satirical EU carrousel but quickly becoming an indispensable daily source of catharsis in an absurd world. Trainees and Europeans exiled to Brussels have a special place in the heart of this beloved government institution.
Femi Oluwole: Feeling down about Brexit? Breathe! Femi is here to help. This millennial twitter machine has single-handedly become one of the most influential spokespersons for the anti-Brexit youth in the UK. All done through sheer will power and optimism.
Ryan Heath: Not only leading Politico Europe but named the top EU influencer the last two years. Often saying what everybody is thinking Ryan Heath has managed to inject some much needed discussion into EU politics. And he has managed to keep Berlaymonster in a sulky second place. Sadly, he’s become a point of attraction for the other side of the pond too,
His video on how Brussels works has well over a million views and has easily explained the EU better than 40 years of BBC coverage. And of course we would be remiss if we didn’t recommend our very own Brussels Brief. Account. Come here for the irreverence, stay for the tribe.
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2.3 Down time Lunch tips Much like the Common Agricultural Policy, the EU’s canteens are subsidised. No butter mountains or wine lakes in the institutions though. If you decide to go for lunch in your DG’s canteen it’s usually a good idea to go before 12:30 when the internal clock of all EU officials cries out for sustenance. It is worth asking if your canteen does trainee discounts (this varies across canteens) and if so, always show your badge. Canteen workers have no mercy when it comes to charging you full price, it’s your job to remind them. Most Trainees will work in the European Quarter fairly close to each other. So where to go for that networking lunch you’ve finally managed to set up? At Brussels Brief we like bagels and Art’s and The hungry trainees’ favourite canteen Bagels in Schuman or Karsmakers close to Place Luxembourg are known for some mean bagels (did The type of place that is a good compromise on someone say bagels?!) location (situated between the European Parliament and the Berlaymont), The Office is a large scale canAlternatively, as a last resort, there’s always an Exki teen style hipster eatery in the European quarter. close by or try Pulp or Paul if you want an extremely The specialties are bagels and baked potatoes. standard sandwich. With 2 locations in Porte de Namur and Place de Londres respectively, Jean Bon is the place to go to for the best sandwiches in town. Freshly-made with the tastiest cheeses and cold cuts and rather large baguettes, this place will have you full for the rest of the day and craving for more from the next.
If you want to pay homage to the beloved Central European staple of Schnitzel, try Maxburg for a pricey yet worthwhile piece of breaded meat heaven. They had a bit of an incident recently when the restaurant caught on fire so your patronage will go a long way to keep this fried meat Brussels institution alive. BeBurger at Place Luxembourg is one of infinite places you can procure gourmet burgers. Don’t go any day other than ‘Crazy Monday’ where you have all you can eat burgers for the price of one. Also, try the fries with truffle sauce. You won’t regret it.
Pro tip: If you want to bump into some Commissioners, buy pricey meat and get eavesdropped on by foreign spies, then be sure to check out Meet Meat next to the Berlaymont. Probably way out of your Trainee budget but good to know when your boss takes you out for lunch.
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Brunch While a good city has brunch, great cities have great brunch and Brussels is no exception. Following the nights when Brussels has taken your soul over for too many GnTs, consider these places the body and mind revivals that will still have you able to enjoy a decent weekend.
Brussels’ greatest antique furniture shops and art galleries, both of which are unlikely to align with a trainee’s budget but one can dream.
If your head is spinning faster than you can think, Peck 20 is an easy choice with classic brunch dishes like eggs florentine and pancakes, plus a La Fabrique en Ville is a cosy and stylish place few originals like chicken waffles and revisited with two locations: one situated in the middle of breakfast wraps. Parc d’Egmont, a green oasis situated in downtown Brussels and the other is in Châtelain. It’s Feeling like something cosy in a neighbourhood best when the sun is shining - yes, we promise that you can then take a walk in to digest it all it does occasionally here - as you can sit outside away? Then give Hinterland a go! An urban esand indulge on a Pimm’s while watching dogs cape with all the lunch classics from pancakes and their owners partake in a lively game of to açai bowls and of course,egg overloads. Esfetch. You can treat yourself to a EUR 29 unlim- sentially all that you need upon to wake happy ited brunch, making rounds and rounds of fresh (albeit hungover) in one single place. quinoa salads, scrambled eggs and an ample choice of bread and pastries. If a hangover has Grand Central hosts a not-so conventional taken the best of you, refer to the À La Carte brunch made up of fresh quinoa salads, pastries, menu that will provide you with some brunch bread and scrambled eggs that’ll give you the sense you’ve made it to an early lunch in one classics, i.e looking at you, eggs benedict. piece. It’s a large place so you won’t ever have If you are keen on a more refined type of awak- to limit the invites. It also has an à la carte menu ening, head over to Créme smack in the middle incase you’re in the mood for a more classic of Sablon. Inspired by Australian breakfast fa- brunch. And should you be in the mood for an vourites, you will have your fair share of avo- alternative thursday night, Grand Central even toast variants, egg dishes and pancakes. Given transforms into a top-notch apéro spot. its location, Crème is a walk away from some of
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Coffee You’re going to want to resort to a professional barista to restore your faith in coffee after the instant coffee or Nespresso you’ll be drinking all week in the office. Brussels, much like every other city in the world, has been invaded by the hipsters and their creepily uniform ‘Brooklyn’ style cafes.
Fika is an incredibly minimalist (see Swedish) cafe tucked away in the area of Saint Boniface which is tiny in the winter and has a relatively large coffee garden for warmer temperatures. If you prefer tea, the ballin’ tea room Comptoir Florian will give you the chance to explore the eclectic world of tea and get your sencha on.
Cafe Velvet in Saint Catherine is a small hipster cafe which is so hip and authentic that it has an- PWDs - Post Work Drinks other location in Medellin Colombia. No Pablo Escobar jokes here, just good reliable, energis- Place Luxembourg on Thursday. ‘Plux’ is the ing powerful powdered coffee. new centre of your life and you’ll learn to hate it and live to love it. It is the centre for young EuOr Coffee in Jourdan is the best bet for good robrats such as yourselves to go socialize after coffee within a one mile radius of the Berlay- work and it is where you will try desperately to mont. They roast their own coffee and have lo- get news about a contract agent position in the cations in Brussels city centre and Ghent if you DG of your dreams. feel like going on a long caffeine run. From time to time the place is crawling with real Italian Caffè Vergnano in Square Schuman is a Eurocrats so don’t miss the opportunity to pick glimpse of Italy and its culture coffee, even in them apart and ruin their evening by asking for the greyest darkest working hours. career advice. With Silvio Berlusconi having arrived in Brussels shortly after the European ParMix coffee, large spaces, art and retail and you liament election in May, we expect Plux to be have a description of L’ Atelier En Ville. With even more crowded and rowdy. What a wonthree locations, L’atelier is a great place to hang derful world... out on Saturday and enjoy the warehouse surroundings and creative vibes.
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Remember that happy hour is from 6-7pm only where most beers are 2 euros which become 4 just when you are getting happy enough to not care about the price. If you do care about the price (and you will), the Delhaize in Place Lux is open until 8 pm and there is a nightshop just around the corner (opposite Luxembourg train station) which is notoriously popular servicing thirsty drunk trainees with €1.50 Jupiler and questionably delicious samosas until late. These of course are to be consumed in the grass area and under no circumstance to be smuggled into the bars...under no circumstance...never ever. Ever. Chatelain on Wednesday. Wednesday (or hump day) is one of those days which is hard to form an opinion on. You’re half way through the working week, but you’re also only half way through the working week. Luckily, Brussels has given Wednesdays a spin that perhaps can give you a boost as much as it has done for us in the past. The Chatelain farmer’s market takes place
every day from 1 pm to 7 pm. Its location is in a rather London-esque neighbourhood of Brussels and a place to see and be seen. Pro tip: Stay at home all week and go out in the weekends like an adult. Chasseurs Ardennais in Schaerbeek is only ten minutes from the Commission and could be considered the Belgian Plux on Fridays. Much like Chatelain, it is an outdoor market the star feature of which is an Alsatian bar serving cremant wine and Strasbourg beer and pretzels.
Nightlife You didn’t just come to save the world by day - no, you’re also here to shake some serious bureaucratic booty by night. Brussels has a decent and varied nightlife spread, something for every type, taste and budget. We recommend the places where we hang out and that way it’s more likely you can buy us a drink.
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Maison du Peuple for a drink, or two, or five. It’s a great spot, decorated with exposed brick and it gets crowded on Saturday nights with some of the best company. Not only that, it’s also located in one of Brussels’ trendiest and most upcoming neighborhoods, St Gilles. Also known as ‘Traveller’s Cafe’, Via Via is a massive space in the heart of Saint Catherine that has ample indoor and outside seating and cheap beer to boot. Part of a network of bars and hostels around the world (locations in Africa, South America and Asia), it is where the cool kids hang with the occasional live gig and event livening an already busy environment.
Cafe Belga is the holy grail in a Brussels trainee’s rite of passage. Equally, A great place to spend sunny afternoons on the terrace looking at the Etangs d’Ixelles as well as a place where you’ll find yourself at 3am sloppy drunk with your tongue down a stranger’s throat as Katy Perry blasts from the speakers. Fuse. Work life got you feeling dull? Need a techno release? Fuse will make sure to fix that. Among Brussels biggest clubs, Fuse is an alternative way to spend your weekend out (because realistically you won’t make it home before 4am and then there goes your two-day rest period).
Kumiko. Much like Brooklyn cafes, Japanese ‘Izakayas’ are all the rage in Western capitals fusing the concepts of a bar, restaurant and club all into one. In Kumiko, have a donburi bowl, drink some sake and dance the night away with a live DJ all in the same spot without a Japanese person in sight.
Pro tip: Centro Cabraliego This Spanish piece of heaven is not an actual bar but more of an expat association. Run by a crew of seniors citizens, they serve fantastically cheap beer and delicious cider. But the main attraction are the tapas which easily come in as our favourite food in town.
Brewdog. Part of the global Brewdog brand of craft beer, the one in Brussels is set right in the heart of Brussels next to Gare Central with tasty (non-Belgian) beer and even tastier burgers. Check out all you can eat Chicken wings on Wednesday evenings for the win.
Please note, this a real Spanish place. You can only pay in cash, the bill won’t be spelled out to you before the end and ordering is only possible between 19:30-21:00, so be on time and bring some friends for a chaotic but amazing night. Camarero!
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LGBTI Nightlife Brussels nightlife also has plenty of gay-friendly venues and parties. The area surrounding Rue Marche au Charbon with Chez Maman (Rue des Grands Carmes) is a classic between queer trainees.
Rainbow Nation and Merhaba work in the intersection between ethnicity, religion and LGBTI culture.
Place Luxembourg on Thursdays is also a very open and gay-friendly place. And of course, the annual Other parties are organized on a non-weekly basis Pride happens every year in Brussels around May (Los Ninos and Vicuna, Gay Haze or La Demence). and gathers most of the city for a parade through the “village� in Mont des Arts. DJ-sets included, and Mothers and Daugthers organise pop-up bars for plenty of after parties. lesbians while Mon Cul Ta Praline parties take place irregularly and focus mainly on the female public.
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Weekends
Culture is food for the soul. Luckily Brussels offers a full banquet.
Museums House of European History - A new museum dedicated to “enhance understanding of European history in all its complexity, to encourage the exchange of ideas and to question assumptions”. Visitors traverse five floors each exploring the many factors that have shaped European identity. From the birth of the Myth of Europa and European Heritage over Industrialisation, Imperialism and war, to modern-day consumerism and the era after the Cold War. Remember to bring an ID card with you in order to use the visitor tablets which guides you through the visit and displays text, sound and video on all the installations, in all 24 official EU languages. A good place to ponder European identity and history. Free entry all day every day.
Pompidou Kanal- As part of the legendary Paris museum of modern art venture into the world, this old warehouse turned museum offers an eclectic mix of exhibitions, live events and even a street food market. A trendy option in a location that is host to a beach festival closer to the summer months. Magritte Museum - Magritte, the pride and joy of the Belgians and man who is famous for saying that a pipe is not a pipe, has his very own spot. Located right next to one of Brussels’ most iconic views, you will find the hours spent inside fly by. Organised so you, the viewer, can experience his life through his art pieces, the museum has some of his most original work.
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Africa Museum: Formerly holder of the dubious honor as Europe’s “most racist museum” (quite a feat considering what Europeans have dabbled in), the museum reopened in December 2018 after years of undergoing reconstruction. The museum now takes a more serious look at the Belgian heritage in Congo and Central Africa and wishes to be a world leading institution in research and knowledge dissemination. With a new exhibition in place the museum promises to take a sober look at Belgium’s past and hopefully can fulfil part of its role of healing wounds and bring discussion and enlightenment to the public.
Parks Parc Cinquantenaire - If you’re keen on going for a run while staying in the midst of the (political) action this is the place for you. Right by the EU headquarters, Parc Cinquantenaire is a fine reflection of the city’s best. Characterised by the monumental arc that brings inspiration just by looking at it, this park is a great place to take a lunch break, too. It also holds a reasonable track field and a mosque. Common sights include people practicing Tai Chi, Acro Yoga and riety of options for family Sunday picnics, runners passed out revelers from Friday night. showing off their latest techniques, as well as youngParc Royal - Class and melancholy characterise this sters giving the old frisbee a go or just having a repark that faces what was once the Royal Palace, now laxed day under the sun with a chilled glass of rosé only used for official state visits and tourist ones, too. before the week resets. Parc Royal is a centrally-located green space to walk through as you head towards downtown. It is often home to food and music festivals, which are always an excuse to toast to remaining a monarchist in the 21st century. Parc Leopold - a favorite of ours. With large weeping willows, green hills and a pond, this is a great place to lie in and spend hungover Sundays at. It’s also home to a basketball court but more importantly, the House of European History (see above). The park is also strategically located between Place Jourdan (where the fries are made) and the European Parliament (where the sausages are made).
If you live downtown, Parc d’Egmont is a tiny jewel squeezed in between old style baroque Bruxelllois architecture and modern tumult. The garden hosts a nice cafe too in case you feel too bothered to move for an iced coffee or something hotter. Bois de la Cambre - a runner’s favorite. This much larger park is a great getaway location for those who want to stay in Brussels but escape the urban setting. It’s great for walks, picnics, occasional music festivals and marathon runners.
Concerts / Live Music
For residents of Saint-Josse and Schaerbeek, Park Bozar: The centre par excellence for the audiovisual Josaphat is a marvelous getaway which offers a va- arts, Bozar hosts an array of festivals that will blow
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your mind, from the Afropolitan festival to Flamenco Festival and the ever popular Balkan festival. They also host bands and cultural events throughout the year so a membership might be a good idea if you are an avid culturiste and want some discounts to the events.
about but didn’t know had a place. Its beers are sold all over town and have a distinctive modern twist on traditional Belgian beer. Its brewery is in the hip Dansaert area and although small, is a must visit for lovers of beer not necessarily made by Abbots.
Brasserie de La Senne beers, equally served in a lot Forest National is the Madison Square Garden of of bars around Brussels. However, its brewery is less Brussels concerts. With a capacity of 8,400 this are- well known being located slightly outside the centre na is host to some of the world’s biggest acts, that is in Molenbeek. In any event, it provides a more tradiif you consider Maitre Gims to be at the same lev- tional brewery setting and its beers on tap are easily el as Beyonce. Located a bit further away from the some of the best out there. city centre, it’s programme of concerts at times pales in comparison to rival Antwerp Sportpaleis which is sometimes preferred by divas. Ancienne Belgique hosts some of the top acts from around the world that are just as talented but not as popular as those that play at Forest National. The good thing is that ticket prices are generally affordable and it is bang in the centre of town. Sounds Jazz Club: a small intimate jazz club which also offers an Italian menu for the hungry with the kitchen serving from 8pm. Located in Ixelles, it is a great choice for the Eurobrat who wants to inject a dose of culture but hates moving through town on a rainy evening. Concerts are available Monday-Saturday. Entrance fees are €7-10 (bring a student card for a discount if you got one). Pro-tip: try Arsene 50: this site offers tickets at half price for same day events on all cultural activities to the benefit of the cultural trainee snob who needs a weekly fix of ballet and opera or Korean cinema experience at proletarian prices.
Breweries Belgium is famous for its beer and should you want to try a beer a day for a few years you are likely not to taste all of them. However, Brussels itself has its own array of breweries which are unique to the city and will leave a mark on your experience here. Brussels Beer Project is the place you always heard
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So much culture to explore. Yum!
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Beerstorming. If you want a true squad bonding experience or want to make the most of the unit away day, Beerstorming is a tiny Brewery in St Gilles which allows you to do a beer tasting session or indeed a more comprehensive (and costly) session where you and your friends can brew your own beer together and come back a few weeks later to pick some up for the next house party.
Explore Belgium
photo is laced with a gruelling climb (unless you want to pay 9 euros for a two minute ride). It is also the birthplace of the inventor of the Saxophone whose name was...wait for it...Adolphe Sax. Namur is the place where you don’t go, but end up for some reason. A place famous for its lack of attractions, there are some cool bars and restaurants to drink away the fact that you are in Namur.
Liege is the jewel of Wallonia known mostly for its Best of Flanders - A trip to Flanders will feel like a waffles and its football team. If you don’t like waffles trip to a different country. Clean streets, cycle lanes or football, a visit to Liege will be surplus to requireand no French is spoken. In fact, if you want to an- ments. noy a Flamand speak to them in French and watch them explode. Ghent is an easy win for where to take your parents when they come to visit. A cool 30 mins by train you get the best of Flanders in a small and manageable city Antwerp is a bit further afield and futuristic, a visit to Antwerp might make you not to want come back to Brussels in its trifecta of beauty, efficiency and attractions. Also, for burger lovers there is a Five Guys there, which makes the 45-minute train ride worth it. Brugge is the place where you have to go whether you like it or not. Its canals make it the ‘Venice of the North’. Made infamous by the mediocre movie, In Bruges, you are bound to bump into an insufferable College of Europe alumnus waxing lyrical on how they used to live there. Best of Wallonia - Wallonia, the French part of Belgium, is similar to France in many ways and very Belgian in others. It is also where the landscape becomes uneven in Belgium, much like the political situation in the country. Dinant is the type of place where Insta-worthy photos of the view from the top of the rock will win you likes galore and make people back home think you live in a wonderland. In reality the work to get that
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3.1 Staying in the EU Institutions “I arrived in Brussels almost 26 years ago to do a 5-month internship. I’ve been trying to leave ever since. Unsuccessfully.” - Gareth Harding The best aspect of pursuing a traineeship within the European Institutions is that it gives you a taste of the sweet Brussels gâteau. Once you’ve tried it you want even more of it but for some reason, you just can’t seem to figure out how to get to that precise bakery again. If you are at the end of your traineeship and your experience has proven to not be awful, maybe even mildly motivating
your prospective career in the EU and, to many, it is the first step towards climbing the Babel tower that is the Berlaymont. In order to get started, pay a visit to Randstad, an agency which services as a middleman between you and the EU Institutions, particularly the Commission. Go in to see them or write them an
“While passing the EPSO concours is the only definitive, long-term strategy to stay employed in the EU institutions, there are other ways to get one foot in the door” or inspiring enough to want to continue working for the EU then it turns out that you can. While attempting (and passing) the EPSO concours is the only definitive, long-term strategy to stay employed in the EU institutions, there are other ways to get one foot in the door - at least further in than a traineeship can get you.
email informing them of your background (briefly, no need to let them know what you had for dinner), your latest employment and your interest to work for the EU. You must be determined and persevere, despite what may seem like an initial disregard from their part. They will invite you in for an EPSO-styled computer-based exam (see more below on EPSO). Should you pass this, you will be placed on a list that they will send to the Interimaire - ‘The Glorified Trainee’ Institutions on a monthly basis. Depending on the The most common way to stay on after your need or available vacancies of a unit, you could be traineeship. Interimaires are the most basic form contacted. of employment in the Commission most trainees obtain, if they continue working in their unit after As with any ‘temp agency’, many of the benetheir traineeship. An interimaire (or interim con- fits that you would be receiving as a regular emsultant) is a short term contract and certainly not ployee of the EU Institutions are not in the cards a luxury position. They normally don’t last longer (healthcare, tax-exclusion, etc). Nevertheless, you than 6 months and can bring little security, as in- can make it off pretty well with weekly contracts terimaires are contracted on a weekly basis. How- (hence, weekly paychecks) and a chance to explore ever, it does provide a much needed foothold for the life of an EU official without all the elements
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that makes the job actually attractive. Think of it work permanently in the EU institutions must pass like non-alcoholic beer or decaf coffee. the European Personnel Selection Office test (or EPSO in the common tongue).
Contract Agent / CAST - ‘The Mercenaries’ Tired of the weekly contracts as an interimaire and ready to go one step further? You sound like a contract agent. This position allows you to work within the EU Institutions for a total of 6 years maximum and is quite possibly the sweetest gig out there. Under this title, you are a full-fledged employee of the EU, which means you receive all the benefits (and all the responsibilities) you could expect from an EU official. To do so you must place your personal and background information (name, passed academic and professional experience, etc.) onto the EU CV online database. From here, interested units can find you using keywords. Should they find your profile potentially suitable for their vacancy, you will be called and asked to take an EPSO-styled computer-based exam, with an added competency-based section. If you pass this exam, you will be called in for an interview(s) until the perfect match is made. At that point, once a unit has chosen to hire you, the paperwork procedure takes approximately 1-3 months. You are then employed and initially on probation for the first 9 months and, should your employer be as satisfied with you as you are with them, your contract is potentially extended to 2 years after the first year and for 3 years after that first renovation (consider this a type of *terms and conditions apply* offer as this extension depends on financial availability and necessity of the unit). Jumping through hoops never had such great consequences.
EPSO - ‘Fool’s Gold’
EPSO is to some a part time job, a second partner, a first child and all of the above. The main thing you need to know is that the odds are stacked against you. Firstly, if studying the notorious tests including numerical, verbal reasoning, abstract exercises doesn’t break your spirit then passing them will be like finding the lost ark. If you do manage then the next step is an interview round at the EPSO assessment center where they separate the wheat from the chaff amid interviews and competitive
“EPSO is to some a part time job, a second partner, a first child and all of the above” arm slinging worthy of some of the toughest in the private sector. For each type of applicant profile there are some common and different elements depending on your background. The entire selection process takes between 5 and 9 months from the date the competition notice is published. If you pass EPSO, you are put on the internal reserve list where the different units draw new officials from when they need to fill new positions. Therefore, it is important to note that you do not apply for a single specific job but a general profile. You may later on transfer to a different unit and make your career within the EU institutions.
You think studying for your degree was hard? Now comes the real challenge. All people who wish to
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This can also mean moving from Commission to the Parliament or to the Council. The entry level position for general administrators is the AD5 level which goes all the way up to AD16 for heads of DGs.
Commission seems to have realised that asking people to enter into a year-long process with no guaranteed results is a bad idea. In fact, it has begun to launch new programmes in an effort to retain talent. And luckily, trainees are one of the target groups. There is some good news and bad news out there: The Commission’s new talent retention proif you are Danish, Swedish or one of the other na- gramme, the Junior Professionals Programme tionalities which are currently underrepresented (JPP), has two annual sessions where Blue Book in the EU institutions (sorry Brits, this one is clos- trainees, CAST staff (function group IV), tempoing rapidly) you just need to pass EPSO and you rary agents and officials can apply. are basically guaranteed a job. After a pre-selection interview in your DG, you will However, that means it is hard for Italians and have do a computer based test followed by a final Spanish people to get in as they are continuous- interview by a Commission-wide selection panel. ly over-represented in EU institutions compared The entire JPP programme lasts two years during to population size (maybe you took notice of that which you are employed as a temporary agent. during your traineeship?). That being said there You will be placed in two different DGs during the are no formal quotas, only an attempt to have a first year (2 x 6 months) in order to get experience balanced composition of EU public officials. from different parts of the Commission. During the second year, candidates are placed back in There are plenty of help out there to make sure their home DG. you don’t have to face the Everest that is studying for EPSO alone. One recommendable treasure to In parallel, you will undergo a training programme get your hands on is the Ultimate EU Test Book of about three days per month which will teach
“Even the Commission seems to have realised that asking people to enter into a year-long process with no guaranteed results is a bad idea” which goes through all the basic tests you will have to do. It provides plenty of tests and explanations of how and why the correct answer is correct especially when you disagree or couldn’t possibly see through the logical train of thought.
you competencies needed by the Commission. At the end of the programme, you will have access to an internal EPSO competition to become an official. You go girl!
Applicants who pass a competition are placed on Internal Graduates - ‘The Insider’s Cheat a reserve list from which the institutions draw recruits as and when they need them. The aim of a Code’ competition, then, is not to fill a specific post, but If you managed to read through all that congrat- to constitute a reserve pool for recruitment needs ulations. EPSO really isn’t for beginners. Even the as they arise.
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The format of these competitions varies depending on the profile being sought. Each competition is announced by what is commonly referred to as a competition notice, giving full details of the profile, the eligibility criteria and the selection procedure.
and which languages or nationalities are required also depend on the MEP, not to mention the size of team he or she is hiring.
MEP Assistants - ‘The Unloved Spouse’
Most MEPs want and need people from their own country (or at least people who are fluent in their language) but there are hundreds of opportunities, to take a look around. One thing you’ll have to keep in mind: this is a political office, so there will inevitably be things you work on you do not agree with. That’s how it is. But most MEPs are swayed by good arguments and if you put in the effort you can have a direct impact on the legislation you are working on.
Some MEPs keep a small team of 4 or 5 people while others literally have dozens of unpaid trainees on retainer and stuff as much money in their Generally, it takes 5-9 months to complete the se- own pockets as possible. Democracy can be ugly lection procedure, starting from the date of publi- at times we must admit. Thus, you need to figcation of the competition notice. Reserve lists for ure out how the conditions are in the office of the generalist competitions are usually valid for 1 year. MEP you want to work for. A good way to do that For other profiles, the length may vary. The validity is asking around or simply writing one of the existof reserve lists can be extended. ing assistants.
MEP Assistants also known as ‘Accredited Parliamentary Assistants’ or ‘Policy Advisors’ as they call themselves on LinkedIn. These are the hottest, most overqualified people in town. The power behind the person, the brains to the brawn, the people who help MEPs from wetting their pants and, when they do, pick up some dry cleaning. Being an MEP assistant is a deeply personal venture. You work directly for your MEP and therefore there are 751 different bosses and over 2000 MEP assistants with varying job experiences. Some are glorified coffee makers. Some literally write EU legislation and sit in on crucial negotiations. We have known both but most do anything in between those two extremes. Work hours, wages
Something to remember that although you work for an MEP you are technically an employee of the European Parliament so that comes with a lot of perks in itself but the downside is that you can’t go campaign on behalf of your MEP in your hometown. At least during working hours.
“These are the hottest, most overqualified people in town. The power behind the person, the brains to the brawn, the people who help MEPs from wetting their pants and, when they do, pick up some dry cleaning”
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The EEAS JPD Programme - ‘Your Friendly Neighbourhood Spies’ The European External Actions Service (EEAS) is the nascent diplomatic service of the EU. Envisioned in the Lisbon Treaty, which entered into force in December 2009, the EEAS was formally established 1 January 2011. Being less than a decade old it is still a part of the EU which is undergoing rapid change.
In addition to this, it also provides the SNEs with practical experience of working in the EU and a better understanding of the way EU decision-making takes place. Increasingly, the use of SNEs has
“It is a smart step for those who are interested in moving their careers from the national to the EU-level but want a taste of the EU life before fully committing”
The EEAS staff headquarters is located in the Schuman roundabout while holding 140 representations around the world. For aspiring young diplomats the EEAS has set up a Junior Professional in Delegations (JPD) programme which offers young qualified professionals the chance to work for the EU worldwide and gain first-hand experience working with in diplomacy. The traineeships last for 12 months with a possible extension of an additional 12 months.
Calls are open every 24 months and positions are highly competitive. You must be a national of an EU member state and the application should be been a way for Member States to ensure deciaddressed to your national ministry of foreign af- sion-making includes their national voices. It has also given an opportunity for curious officials to fairs. work within the EU beast without having to comSeconded National Experts - ‘Spies without mit fully to both living abroad permanently and giving one’s soul to passing EPSO. the Thrill’ An increasingly common feature of the Commission machinery is the deployment of Seconded National Expert (SNEs) who are posted by their national governments in the EU institutions for a temporary period of time. This achieves several goals: staffing the EU with people with the right technical skills, cultural insight and understanding of the political positions of their home governments.
On the other hand, it is a smart step for those who are interested in moving their careers from the national to the EU-level but want a taste of the EU life before fully committing. A secondment lasts between 6 months and 4 years. However, you can only return for a second period of secondment after 6 years has passed in between. Contact your Permanent Representation or relevant national ministry for more information on available SNE positions.
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Job Platforms You’ve had this great work experience for 6 months or maybe, if you’ve been lucky, even longer and now you’re thinking you don’t actually want to leave this rainy but terribly addictive city. There are a variety of ways in which the EU network in Brussels makes it possible for you to stay, or at least try to.
They publish vacancies currently offered by a variety of firms, agencies, consultancies, NGOs and others seeking employees. Check these websites out just to see the ridiculous array of job listings and the insane job conditions required: 3 year experiences in managing projects for a internship? You got it.
To start off, it is important to regularly check websites like: • EuroBrussels • Euractiv Jobs • Politjobs • Global Jobs.
Don’t despair if it seems you are relentlessly applying to postings with little to no feedback. Give it enough time (and a couple of hundred emails later) you will receive some response, possibly even a chance for an interview.
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3.2 Staying in the Eurobubble
Private Sector & NGOs Public sector isn’t for you? Did you come to Brussels with the dream of becoming a hotshot lobbyist earning 6 figures a year and working 12 hours a day? Then your most logical next step is to head towards the over 30,000 ‘lobbies’ or ‘interest representations’ that are present in Brussels.
energy transition to new transport fuel efficiency targets for the road haulage sector. Among the notable consultancies are:
Hill+Knowlton Strategies: The ultimate mercenaries of the Brussels lobby landscape. You come to These are mostly made up of big international H+K to get experience and learn the trade. Most consultancies, industry associations, NGOs, Think of their staff is young and staff turnover is notoTanks and individual companies’ lobbies. There are riously high meaning that this might not be the place you will stay forever but it can be a good ample opportunities to kick off. stepping stone in your career and the place that teaches you the hard realities of Brussels lobbyConsultancies ism. Consultancies provide a wide range of options for the eager young professionals who want to get Burson Cohn & Wolfe (formerly Burson-Marsteller): their hands on new and challenging tasks. Often BCW have changed their name recently but not they are catch-all offices and you can easily end much else has changed. One of the world’s leadup following files as divergent as digital economy, ing Public Relations and Communications firm
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with over 4000 people spread Across all the continents save Antarctica (who knows for how long). BCW works in most areas and with most clients and with a dozen of open positions at anytime. Apply now before your neighbour.
Industry Associations With over 2000 registered business and trade associations and 1300 associations with a permanent presence in Brussels, there is hardly any interest group with respect for itself which doesn’t have an office or umbrella organisation in Brussels.
Deloitte: Equal parts accountancy and public relations company, Deloitte is one of the true global behemoths in the consultancy world and is known From the fearsome farmers’ union COPA-COGECA for its dedicated work force and strong Esprit de which can tumble the mightiest of empires, to the Corps inculcated through plenty of afterwork ac- unseemly Envelope Producers Association. tivities and amenities. Everything is available here. So regardless whethIn Brussels, Deloitte’s headquarters are located er you’re focused on renewable biofuels, want to outside the city by Zaventem airport (practical for represent disabled people or have an interest in when consultants have to go on business trips) your national finance system in the wider Europeand they will likely give you a car before a pay raise an context, there is surely an option for you here. to ensure you show up on time. The advantage of working for an association is FleishmanHillard: With offices in over 20 coun- that you speak on behalf of a diverse group and tries around the world FleishmanHillard is a stan- make a lot of contacts both with national as well dard bearer in the Public Relations jungle. Their as European actors which is a great way to enBrussels office has a staff of over 70 people and hance your network across sectors and learn the manage a wide range of topics, meaning you can insights of your sector. get experience in any field here. But beware, if Monsanto or JP Morgan isn’t your cup of tea, bet- A good way to get an overview of what might be ter think it over twice. available is to scroll through the EU’s Transparency Register which has a near complete list of all RPP Group: RPP is a specialized agency focusing association working at the European level. on health and consumer policy. Operating in 8 cities across Europe and Australia, RPP is a mid- Here you can also put in specific parameters like sized consultancy, smaller than FleishmanHillard which policy area or what kind of association, be and H+K but still large enough to be a household it volunteering or profit oriented, you are hooked name in Brussels with career perspective for the on. young starry-eyed trainee. Other notable mentions include EPPA, Grayling, Edelman and many, many more. Worth noting that these tend to work for the highest bidder, so it is likely you might be working for some large corporations and not-so-democratic governments so as to keep the account cash flowing.
NGOs Non-Governmental Organisations are as diverse as the name would suggest. What they have in common is being independent from states, a non-profit based goal and typically work in the fields of environment, education, health or the social sphere in the furtherance of a broader goal like the fight against climate change, stopping domestic violence or enhancing transparency in the EU (ehem, Council).
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What makes NGOs stand apart then is the fact have a PhD student in your stomach but want to that they generally have more limited resources give the researcher’s life a go before committing, than industry associations and rely on member- maybe CEPS is the place for you. ship fees and other funding. Bruegel is a Think Tank that specializes in ecoWhat you might miss in pay you will be able to nomics. Established some 15 years ago, it is not make up for in diversity as many NGOs are true the oldest of think tanks but it has garnered a lot melting pots of people coming from all EU coun- of attention and hosts a range of events with top tries (and beyond). All depending on which focus ranking politicians on the issues of the day (often area you have. Many NGOs also work closely with euro related). EU institutions, allocate funds or participate in EU programmes. An NGO can therefore not just be a Bonus: they have a podcast where you can get all rewarding place to work but also a way for you to the latest monetary policy gossip you never knew get to know people in other parts of the machin- you had interest in. ery before taking that definitive leap that is EPSO. The Lisbon Council: A think tank with a green and sustainable economic ethos, the Lisbon Council Think Tanks has been ahead of the political curve and seems Think Tanks have been multiplying in recent years like an ideal place for the environmentally woke and function as a mixture of academic research, Eurobrat to start digging into the complex quesideas lab and a political communications agency. tions like the economics of climate change and Brussels hosts quite a few think tanks including Universal Basic Income models. big weights and smaller ones. Political Think Tanks: Each political group in the Keep in mind that think tanks have more or less European Parliament has its own think tank which explicit goals and objectives and tend to favour supports policy making of MEPs in furtherance of some interests over others even if their publica- their agenda and work as ideas labs. This makes tions are presented as neutral research. Another the political think tanks slightly different from oththing to ponder before sending out applications is er think tanks as they are honest about their powhether you like to do research and write policy litical bias. heavy analyses. People with a background in academia often find think tanks interesting places to The best known of these is the Wilfried Martens look at concrete ideas and deliver policy solutions Centre, the official think tank of the European while others can drown in the details of a statisti- People’s Party (EPP), named after the former Belcal regression analysis of comparative labour sta- gian Prime Minister of the same name. tistics. To each his own, as the saying goes. For the S&D group, FEPS does the thinking while the Greens are supported by GEF, the Green EuA couple of noteworthy mentions include: ropean Foundation. Before applying, consider if Centre for European Policy Studies (CEPS): you want to make your career in the EPP’s think Founded in 1983, CEPS is a powerhouse in the tank if you voted for the far-left, and vice-versa. EU Think Tank Dimension. Employing over 60 researchers and hosting well over a 100 events per Not satisfied by our choices? There are many year, CEPS does research in all areas pertaining to more. European policies from interbanking-finance regulations to EU asylum and migration policy. If you
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Regional & National Representations When You Don’t Get the Job
Journalism
tem that to most people remains deeply strange Many of these institutions are small but many and incomprehensible. can be large operations such as those of the German länder which can rival some Permwith Reps You have worked in a complex organisation in terms of staff and real estate. Of course, it helps to be from the region / country when you apply to one of these but it is not a strict prerequisite with many of these looking to expand their horizons with foreign staff.
Nonetheless, in Brussels, there are bureaus of most of the major world newspapers have some sort of presence here. Politico Europe, of course, is the home grown superstar and is a profitable business with reporters working a variety of policy areas. Expect long hours, low pay and freelance contracts before you get that Pulitzer.
The emergence of cities and regions has been something of awith phenomenon in recent gets decades We’ll be honest you, not everyone the with their own institution in the Committee of dream job, or even any job. Many of our friends the Regions. Although not technically diplomatand indeed some of us have had to move back institutions, offices represent opat ic some point, but that that shouldn’t keepregions you down. erate much like their biggerexperience siblings, thethat national You have acquired valuable your representations, without the spy work. peers back home don’t have, you now know a sys-
The Fourth Estate has had a rough time of late. With layoffs in new media companies such as Buzzfeed and Vice worldwide and legacy newspapers struggling to adapt to the digital sphere, the profession of journalist is as unstable as the politics that they cover.
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3.3 Moving Back Home - Thank You, Next When You Don’t Get the Job
and indeed some of us have had to move back at some point, but that shouldn’t keep you down.
We’ll be honest with you, not everyone gets the dream job, or even any job. Many of our friends and indeed some of us have had to move back at some point, but that shouldn’t keep you down. You have acquired valuable experience that your peers back home don’t have, you now know a system that to most people remains deeply strange and incomprehensible.
You have acquired valuable experience that your peers back home don’t have, you now know a system that to most people remains deeply strange and incomprehensible.
You have worked in a complex organisation with multiple languages being spoken at meetings, sometimes at the same time and different culYou have worked in a complex organisation with tures working together. That kind of experience multiple languages being spoken at meetings, is valuable in any organisation, the only thing is to sometimes at the same time and different cul- highlight it so that your future employer undertures working together. That kind of experience stands what you can bring of value. is valuable in any organisation, the only thing is to highlight it so that your future employer under- Sell Yourself and Your Traineeship stands what you can bring of value. You were one of only a few people to make it through. Even if your country doesn’t have that Sell Yourself and Your Traineeship many applicants, don’t mind, you focus on the You were one of only a few people to make it positive aspects. Thousands, sometimes tens of through. Even if your country doesn’t have that thousands of young professional apply for trainmany applicants, don’t mind, you focus on the eeships in the EU and only a few hundred get to positive aspects. Thousands, sometimes tens of go. So use that as a case in point when you need thousands of young professional apply for train- to demonstrate why you can be a valuable team eeships in the EU and only a few hundred get to player and co-worker. go. So use that as a case in point when you need to demonstrate why you can be a valuable team EU Trainee Ambassador is a trainee-run initiative born only last year that intends to prepare those player and co-worker. interested promoting EU traineeships and, incidentally the EU in their home countries. It is also When You Don’t Get the Job a good excuse to keep in touch with the EU inWe’ll be honest with you, not everyone gets the stitutions by becoming a de facto agent for them (pro bono, of course). dream job, or even any job. Many of our friends
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3.4 The Internship Hustle - Advice for Professional Interns Another Internship or Contract? So what do you do if you can’t get an actual position in any of the above, is another internship an option? That question will depend on your age, how many internships you have done before, and whether mum and dad are willing and able to bankroll your life in a European capital. It has become almost an unspoken rule between all organisations in Brussels, either through lack of funding or pure capitalistic callousness to have permanent trainee positions where they can get away with having a high turnover of overqualified people at a low stipend (if any).
while there are fewer people hungry work in organisations linked with the EU, when the price for that is their free labour.
Others use internships to suss out who is worth the ink on their CV, as an extended interview of sorts to hire future employees. What is an inevitable reality is that Brussels, and particularly the Eurobubble, is filled with an abundance of overqualified, intelligent people willing to work long hours for low wages with the prospect of success, status, Europhilia or all of the above as their goals. It works out for some, but it has been said that there is an entire ‘golden’ generation of professionals that are wasting away in the Brussels internship (vicious) cycle.
Intern Organisations
Know Your Rights If you are to pursue another traineeship, and you probably will, it is worthwhile noting that there are many different options out there, in other words, an unpaid internship can be avoided if done properly. The attention on both a national and international level towards this issue is ensuring that the public and private sector together take note,
The EU has made some kind of declaration on traineeships, however, in the 2014 Council Recommendation on a uality Framework for Traineeships. You can read that for yourself but it doesn’t take a genius to deduce that they do not address the issue of pay and conditions of traineeships strongly enough. They are evidently had some good legal trainees.
Thankfully, you’re not on your own. If you do find yourself in a traineeship situation and are looking to get some dedicated advice on whether you’re getting short-changed in any way, direct your attention to the various grassroots organisations looking to lobby for and help interns in their struggle. Brussels Intern NGO (B!ngo). Started in 2013, they have a substantial team are behind a lot of the initiatives and marches you’ll see around Brussels in defence trainee’s rights. EU Interns 4 Interns is another more EU focused organisation with a significant following. If you are looking to find a quality internship, the organisation Interns Go Pro only advertise internships that pass their stringent quality standards on their pla orms. Communaute Europ enne du Stage is a french language Facebook group where internships of all types are posted but are usually sieved naturally by the power of the crowd.
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End Note Thanks for reading all the way through. Congrats! For doing so you have earned a spot in #Wonderleyen’s cabinet (terms and conditions apply, don’t read the small print). We hope you got as much information / enjoyment from reading this as we did writing it. Our aim is to keep this ‘Bible’ updated for every cohort of trainees so that each one is passed on generations of trainee knowledge and wisdom in a single document. In order to do so, we would love your help. If you loved this edition, send it to your friends. If you hated it, keep it to yourself and shoot us an email at editor@brusselsbrief.eu. to tell us what you would keep, what you would get rid of and, most importantly, what you would add to the next edition. In any case, we want to hear about your best experiences, anecdotes as well as embarrassing work stories and drunken Plux nights on social media. Use the hashtag #EUTrainee on Twitter or send us a picture with #EUTrainee on Instagram. Also why not DM us on our Facebook page or check out our Instagram. If you have a good story or picture, we’d love to feature it. We also want to hear of pet peeves, horror stories and cliches on #EUTraineeProblems. It might even become a feature in the next guide. Good luck for the rest of your traineeship and career start in Brussels. We hope to have been a good friend in the beginning and hope to maintain the friendship as you go through your journey.’ If you would like to keep us in your life and, in the meantime, get informed on what is being reported on and about the EU then please do us a solid and sign up to Brussels Brief so that we can send you our weekly update with everything that people are talking about, along with some things people aren’t discussing. À bientôt, The Brussels Brief Team
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