ARE LIMITING BELIEFS HOLDING YOU DOWN?

------------ BY DAVE KAHLE

“IN YOUR TRAINING, do you focus on instilling new skills, or do you try to remove the hindrances to people using their existing skills?”

It’s one of the best questions I’ve ever been asked. I recall it clearly. I was having lunch with the CEO of a large non-profit, for whom I was training their social workers in sales skills. As a professional trainer, it is a question I have considered for decades. It really speaks to the heart of the task of helping someone improve and develop. And, while it is a deep question that I’ve considered, I never expected to hear it from a client.

The answer is that we (the teachers and trainers in the world) do both. We teach the practices and competencies that are proven and fundamental for success in sales and leadership. In many cases, these are new skills, new ideas and new practices for the learner.

At some point in the process, though, a very predictable phenomenon occurs. While the learner accepts, intellectually, the value of what was been taught, he/she makes no—or a very limited—attempt to actually put it into practice.

The Process

It’s a two-step process: First, the learner needs to become aware of some practice, process, idea or skill. Then, they need to intentionally work to put it into practice.

The first step is the easiest. It only takes a small amount of effort to identify practices, processes and skills which have been proven to be effective in your job or profession.

For trainers, the real challenge lies in helping the learner to actually use those practices. For someone intent on helping people develop, tap into their potential, and become more successful, it is the primary hurdle. I call it the “gap between idea and action.” It is relatively easy to transmit ideas; it is incredibly difficult to help the individual put them into action.

It is a complex problem, with lots of reasons that dissuade people at different times and places. For example, they can be as simple and superficial as not having the time: “I was so busy with other things that I just didn’t have time to give it the thought necessary to make the change.”

Fear of the discomfort that comes with any change in behavior is one of the most common. “I’m not comfortable doing that new thing. I’m not an expert at it, and I’ll feel foolish for a while. I’d rather not pay that price to gain a new skill.”

The Most Potent Obstacles

That list of reasons why the gap between idea and action is a difficult one to traverse can go on for pages. For now, I’d like to focus on a class of obstacles to changed, and better, behavior: our pre-existing beliefs.

As an educated and experienced practitioner in the profession of helping people change their behavior, I’ve come to the conclusion that our set of pre-existing beliefs supplies the largest and most potent set of obstacles to self-improvement, and is the most difficult hurdle preventing greater success and fulfillment.

Human beings naturally make observations and conclusions about our experiences as we grow up and experience life. Eventually, some of these become hardened into beliefs. These beliefs that form our base set of assumptions about the world, and we make choices and live our lives based on those beliefs.

For example, a child can have a difficult relationship with one of his parents and begins to think that all people of that sex are arbitrary, aggressive and can’t be trusted. He forms a “confirmation bias,” which leads him to look for those things in others of that sex. After a couple of experiences that seem to confirm his bias, that thought coalesces into a belief, and then begins to influence all his behavior.

This belief becomes buried into the deeper layers of his heart. And it burrows into the subconscious level. He doesn’t even know that he believes it, he just operates on the basis of it. So, when he is dating, for example, he sees his potential life mates through the lens of this pre-existing belief. And that hinders his relationships with the opposite sex.

He may go to an excellently presented workshop on “Communicating with the Opposite Sex,” for example, and learn some of the best practices of communication, but is unable

(Continued on page 30) to put them into practice because the gap between idea and action harbors his belief, and that belief prevents him from turning the good idea into action. With the best of intentions to implement his newly found practices, his belief trumps his intellectual ascent, and prevents him from following through. His potential for a loving, life-long relationship is hindered because of the unconscious belief he developed along the way.

This process is such a part of human life that every human struggles with it. The Bible, for example, calls these unconscious beliefs “strongholds” and indicates that they are destroyed through the spiritual power inherent in Christians.

Cultural Beliefs

Limiting beliefs are not just an individual issue. They can be distributed among affinity groups of people and become part of the culture of that group. Families have limiting beliefs that they share, as do larger communities.

One of our travel experiences that made a life-long impact on me occurred in the ‘90s when Coleen and

I were visiting Soweto, a township on the outskirts of Johannesburg, South Africa. On the day that we were there, the children were on strike, refusing to go to school. Even stranger than that was the reason they were on strike: they objected to being graded as individuals. Their tribal belief system promoted the idea that they not to be respected. As a result, family members are regularly in trouble with employers and the courts. were a closely connected group, and that any attempt to recognize that one person did better than another was an attack on that belief. Either the whole class passed, or the whole class failed. The individual had value, not as an individual, but only as a part of the larger group.

In my Soweto example, the belief holds people down, and prevents individual achievement that would lift up the entire community. As a result, the community lives at the level of subsistence generation after generation.

While these two examples illuminate some life-changing and societyimpacting beliefs, not all limiting beliefs are so potent. We all have a host of them that impact our on-thejob performance. They can impact professional salespeople and hold them back. “Salespeople are good talkers” is one. “I have great relationships with my customers” is another.

As with all such cultural components, these beliefs have consequences. A family can share a belief that all authority figures are arbitrary and

Overcoming Limiting Beliefs

Beliefs can be both positive and negative. Martin Seligman’s great book, Learned Optimism, describes the impact that positive beliefs can have in bringing success to one’s life.

Not everyone is hindered by the gap between idea and action, for example. Some—typically about 20-30% of a training class—go on to incorporate the new practices into their routines and enjoy the positive outcomes as a result. My focus here is not on developing positive beliefs, but rather on overcoming negative ones. It’s not the minority who seamlessly incorporate the training that is my focus; it is the majority who don’t.

In many ways, our development as humans is dependent on our ability to eliminate or overcome our limiting beliefs. Since limiting beliefs are subconscious, and influence our behavior, the way to identify them is to study our behavior. Patterns of behavior that seem to be unreasonable, that often lead to negative outcomes, are often indicators of a limiting belief that prompted that behavior.

Back to our example of the man raised with a limited belief about the opposite sex. If he sees himself acting unreasonably in multiple situations, then that behavior indicates a pattern, and that pattern of unreasonable negative behavior indicates a limiting belief. For example, he may get overly angry at the slightest perceived insult, when none was intended, and other reasonable people would not have acted that way.

A little introspection indicates that this is a pattern of behavior. That it has become habitual. Those are indications that there is a limiting belief prompting that behavior.

So, the first step is to identify patterns of unreasonable, negative behavior. Friends, family members, and colleagues can provide some insight into this.

The next step is to identify the belief that prompted that behavior. This is where a professional consult can help. If you’re working by yourself, ask the question, “Why” and as objectively as possible, search for the belief. See if you uncover and label it. Give it words and describe it.

This is difficult work. Multiple books have been written on various aspects of it. It is much more complex than my few words indicate.

Once you identified the negative behavior and the underlying belief, you can attack it at both levels. You can become aware of the behavior, and whenever you find yourself in that situation, follow one of Seligman’s techniques: Simply tell yourself to “Stop” and then “Switch” to some other behavior. Do that enough, repeat it enough times, and you will have built a more positive habit.

Or you can attack it at the level of the belief. Now that you have uncovered and labeled it, argue with yourself. Think through all the reasons why the belief is false. Convince yourself that the belief is unfounded and leads to negative behavior, Defeat the belief itself. You may find it helpful to formulate a positive rule and substitute that every time the old belief expresses itself.

If you can successfully bridge the gap between idea and action, you’ll have gained a self-improvement tool that will serve you well for the rest of your life.

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Huttig Folded Into Woodgrain

Woodgrain is combining its Huttig Building Products and Woodgrain Distribution Division into a single entity known as Woodgrain.

The formal consolidation comes 11 months after Woodgrain purchased Huttig and began to unite the two companies.

“Since the acquisition of Huttig, our combined teams have been hard at work building a stronger future,” said Todd Dame, president of Woodgrain’s Distribution Division. “We have been identifying the best of both companies, standardizing business processes, investing in facilities and equipment, and collaborating to deliver more value to our customers. We are excited to go to market as one company and continue Woodgrain’s growth. We also want to acknowledge and celebrate Huttig’s long history as a leading distributor of millwork and building materials.”

Tal Holdings Buys Rental Shop

TAL Holdings, Vancouver, Wa., has agreed in principle to acquire Harbor Rental and Saw Shop,

Friday Harbor, Wa., complementing its Browne’s Home Center branch, which is also in Friday Harbor.

Harbor Rental has been a trusted name in the San Juan Island community since 1974, providing equipment and tool rental, small engine repair, and lawn mower sales.

“The acquisition of Harbor Rental is a key component of TAL’s growth strategy,” said TAL CEO Jason Blair. “This acquisition will allow us to diversify our business profile, expand our service offerings, and better support the San Juan Island community. By incorporating Harbor Rental and allocating millions of dollars towards the renovation of Browne’s Home Center, we demonstrate our dedication to helping build better communities for many years into the future.”

Owned by the Olshefsky family for 36 years, Harbor Rental has operated under a commitment to excellence and customer satisfaction. Darren Olshefsky, current manager and one of the owners, said, “We are excited for this partnership, as it will provide our employees with additional resources and growth opportunities, benefiting all parties involved—employees, customers, and vendors.”

Effective May 1, Harbor Rental officially joined the TAL family of companies and continues to operate under the same name. With the acquisition, TAL now has a total of 30 locations in Idaho, Montana, Oregon and Washington.

ABC Supply has opened new branches in San Bernardino, Ca. (Kevin Banfield, branch mgr.), and Durango, Co. (Zachary Wynne, mgr.).

J.M. Thomas Forest Products is now distributing MoistureShield’s full composite decking portfolio from its branches in Ogden, Ut.; Denver, Co.; and Boise, Id.

Foundation Building Materials, Santa Ana, Ca., has completed the purchase of 32-unit Marjam Supply Co., Farmingdale, N.Y. Foundation has also signed on as the first “jersey patch partner” of the Los Angeles Angels for the 2023 Major League Baseball season.

McCoy’s Building Supply now offers customers Simpson Strong-Tie Deck Planner, Pergola Planner, and Fence Planner software on mccoys.com.

Westlake Royal Building Products is introducing PROS Perks, a contractor loyalty program for its 13 brands, including Zuri decking, Royal siding, Versetta Stone, Celect, TruExterior and Kleer.

ODL, Zeeland, Mi., has expanded into exterior doors by purchasing Tru Tech Doors of Ontario, Canada. It will roll out steel and fiberglass ODL Doors, built by Tru Tech, in the U.S. and Canada.

Fiberon issued an Environmental Product Declaration (EPD) for its Wildwood cladding.

Simpson Strong-Tie received the 2022 Specialties Vendor of the Year award from LBM Advantage.

Roseburg Expanding Big In Oregon

Roseburg Forest Products, Springfield, Or., will invest $700 million over the next four years to upgrade and expand its manufacturing operations in Southern Oregon, where the company was founded nearly 90 years ago. The investment includes the creation of two new, state-of-the-art manufacturing plants at its Dillard Complex, and technological upgrades at existing plants in rural Douglas and Coos counties.

The total project represents the largest known investment in manufacturing in rural Oregon, and one of the largest private capital investments of any kind in the state’s history.

“Across the business, Roseburg is embracing advanced manufacturing and leveraging new technology and methods to make our current products and develop new ones, with the goal of ensuring we remain competitive in the global market,” said president and CEO Grady Mulbery.

Dillard MDF will use wood residuals from Roseburg’s local mills and other regional mill suppliers to manufacture standard medium density fiberboard panels, as well as thin high density fiberboard, often used in cabinetry, doors and other applications. The plant will produce panels with a thickness range from 2mm to 28mm.

“HDF is a new product for Roseburg that meets growing customer demand for domestically manufactured panels of increasing thinness and strength,” Mulbery said. “Dillard MDF will be one of the most technologically advanced plants of its kind in the world, and it alone represents $450 million of our $700-million investment.”

Dillard Components will convert specialty MDF panels from Roseburg’s MDF plant in Medford, Or., into Armorite Trim, a finished exterior product for residential and shed use. It’s an innovative, new product currently unavailable within the industry or market. Roseburg will invest roughly $50 million in this plant.

The new plants will have a combined annual capacity of 175 million sq. ft. of MDF, 70 million sq. ft. of exterior trim, and 90 million ft. of interior moulding.

MDF is an engineered wood product made from softwood residuals combined with wax and resin and formed into panels. It is denser than plywood, and stronger and denser than particleboard. HDF is a thinner, denser version of MDF. Roseburg currently owns and operates three MDF plants in North America.

The company anticipates that both new plants will begin operations in 2025, and will employ approximately 120 people once completed.

The remaining $200 million of the investment will go toward improvements at existing Roseburg plants in Oregon over the next four years, including a new dryer at its plywood plant in Coquille and significant upgrades at its plywood plant in Riddle, including two new lathe lines and a new hardwood plywood line.