The GULF COAST LUMBERMAN

HOUSTON, TEXAS

JACK DIONNE,

Pubusher

Joe Was Away Off

Two Osage Indians took onrtoo much fire water and wound up in twin beds in the fospital.

"How do you feel now?" " {ur"e asked one of them the next morning. I

"Me all right," he said, inrf Joe very sick. Joe he blind. Last night five turkey buz)#ds with plug hats on sit on foot of Joe's bed and Joe no can see um. Joe his eyes very sick".

Homes T

Some homes are just as bharmingp{a mausoleum, without a mausoleum's privilege of lettin'f you stretch out.\

Ten Marks Of An Educated Man

He keeps his mind open on all questions until the evidence is all in.

He always listens to the man who knows.

He never laughs at new ide

He never despises the opini s of youth.

He knows his stronc-poin and plays it.

He knows when to thil*, nd when to call, in an expert to think for him.

You can't sell him magic.

He lives the fbrward-looking, outward-looking life.

He cultivates a love of the beautiful.

The Sales Question

Customer-"Are these egg\s[rictly fresh?"

Grocer-"Just laid this mind\d. (To helper) George, are those eggs cool enough to sell yEt?"

Expertence Makes Characier

Seldom does one see character w{ittertd the face of youth. Only after the erosion of yea\"y'triving, responsibility, longing, disappointment, pain,-sorrow, losing, do our souls begin to show through in our eyes and faces.

Undergrown

Pat's boss was treating him to a thimble full of his best old pre-war stock, and thinking to impy/Ss him with the great value of the drink, he said: / "Pat, that whisky is seventy yea\ E[a."

"Well", said Pat, "it's dang smaif for it's age, I'll say that."

A Good Philosophy

Get up right in the morninC. Fo to bed right at night. Start your day with joy iq yogf heatt, confidence in your cause, kindness and toleran\e;6r others. If it's a dark day, brighten it up., If it's brightf make it brighter. Distribute your grins, warm grips, and friendly words. If we will just remember that happiness comes from within and not from without we'll start making our own. That thought is a wellspring of joy.

A Natural

First Darkey: "Whut's you b_aby's name?"

Second Darkey : "Elecnyl(y."

First Darker: "WhJl {ro" calls him dat?"

Second Darkey: "Catlfe, his mama's name is Dinah, an' mah name is Mose, an' its fum dynamos dat electricity comes, ain't it?"

Cooperation

Said a wise old bee at the close of day, "This col,ony business doesn't pay. I put my honey in that old hive, That others may live, and eat, and thrive; And I do more work in a day, by gee, Than some of the others do in three. I toil, and worry, and save, and hoard, And all I get is my room and board. ft's me for a hive I can run myself, And me for the s*/6ts of my hard-earned pelf." So the old bee fleufto a meadow lone, And started a fu$ress of his own. He gave no th{rJht to the buzzing clan, But all intent o{ fris selfish plan He lived the life-of a hermit free"Ah, this is great," said the wise old bee. But the summer waned and the days grew drear, And the lone bee wailed as he dropped a tear, For the varmints gobbled his little store, And his wax played out, and his heart was sore. So he winged his way to the old home land, And took his meals at the Helping Hand. For it's all for each, and each for all, United stand or divided fall.